#cue rinse and repeat the they/them thing.

[theguardianace]

gender my beloved behated

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Spoilers for Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom

I haven't actually finished the game but I was thinking, what if Zelda never returns to being a hylian and just remains a dragon forever? Who would be the next in line for the throne?

That's right.

Link. Why?

1. Link is from a long family of knights and one of the only known and confirmed nobles in the game

2. Link is one of the only people in Hyrule to know many classified secrets of the royal family (especially if he regains all his memories from his time as Zeldas personal guard and whatnot)

3. Link has saved and aided all of the different tribes on multiple occasions and united them under him.

4. He has personal friendly relationships with all the tribes leaders aka the chiefs and Zora king

5. Link is pretty good as descalating conflicts and finding middle grounds

6. Link is cononically just as compassionate and lovable as Zelda is and would be beloved as Prince

Theres more but I think you got the picture. Just imagine Prince Link, uncomfortable about this turn of events but willing to do what is best for his people.

So I propose a plot for the new DLC: Of course theres a new Big Bad (maybe a sorcerer like Vaati or something) who makes themselves a castle of thier own in the Depths and is trying to take over hyrule but in a different way than we've seen before. Sure they still create monster and cause havoc but they also do political stuff like scandal and slander

Link gathering alliances with the people of the different tribes and trying to clear his name after he's been framed for crimes he did not commit maybe? He, that doesn't really fit the vibe with what I'm going for, but what if the new Big Bad tried to make the people of Hyrule like him more and use thier love of him as a way into power?

Maybe disasters keep happening and the new guys servents/knights keeps saving the day but things keep getting worse and worse. Maybe there could be a new game mechanic where there's a ward or talisman that stops dark magic/ evil entities from entering the city and most of the disasters in that area stopping entirely and when the servent/knight tries to enter the city they hit a magic barrier and it sounds like a mosquitoe getting zapped by a bug zapper and they scream, revealing themselves to be a monster who had been the one causing all the disasters in the first place. The civilians freak out and the monster flees.

Link and the sage of that area believed in Link the whole time/was suspicious of the servant/knight follows the monster with Link and they find a maze like nest the monster has created

Cue dungeon

Cue boss battle

Rinse and repeat for all the sages people (maybe there are some previously unknown Zonai survivors that Minaru is awed and excited to find and she takes them in idk) maybe they were lost in time or something. Maybe thats where the big bad came from and the the Zonai children interrupted the Big Bads spell and thay wound up in the distant future, the children later running away in confusion and terror. So new tribe and dungeon? Just a thought

DLC features:

1. MASSIVE main quest to renovate the castle where you get to redecorate it however you want. Like you get to choose the furniture and decorations and have things restored to thier former glory. Granted you have to pay for repairs out of your own pocket (taxes can only go so far and thats going towards rebuilding the towns and stuff) and you get to put up your own pictures to replace those torn apart portraits and stuff you see around the castle in BOTW and TOTK. You can put up pictures of Hyrules former royals, the champions, the sages, ect. Or you can go the painting route where someone paints the photos you have on your Purah Pad like in your house in Terry Town. I would buy the DLC just for this to be honest

As you renovate the castle and dig out all the collaped pathways you get new memories of Links time as a soldier and get to see his family as well as memories with Zelda

I would throw so much money at Nintendo just to be able to renovate the castle to my liking. Like, so much you have no idea

2. Link getting a freaking crown and royal armor sets. One for prince and another after he's corinated as king near the end of the game

Armor sets based off of the new and old boss monsters

Armor sets based off of the mini-boss monsters including Gloom Hands (this one looks horrifying btw) and you get some kinda boost from each that represents that specific monster like a Hinox set giving you a food affect boost and Gloom Hands set boosts the power of the Phantom Ganon drops

Maybe a sage set that boosts the powers of the sages a bit

Forest dweller set that increases the durability of wooden weapons

3. Rebuilding the town ruins and creating homes for people all over hyrule like the Deya village ruins and Tabantha ruins and you can do it Lurelin Village style (I loved that side quest it was actually pretty fun)

Anyway, this is me officially releasing this idea to Nintendo it they want it so long as they credit me for the ideas they use from me. They don't even have to pay me (but hiring me would be nice)

Here's a poll to maybe help convince them this is a good idea

@nintendo :)

[fayeandknight]

This post is about teaching potty on cue for dogs.

Tagging @ringchollyandfriends

Potty on cue is one of the first things I teach, but it's still applicable to older dogs. I used a mark and reward method for this.

Things you need: a clear marker that means the dog did the right thing and will get paid for it and something the dogs finds valuable as a reward.

For a marker I use both a clicker and the word yes. These are paid 100% of the time. If you already have marker you use great. If not, take a few training reps to condition it. Easiest way is to have the dog do something simple they already know how to do and introduce the marker that way. For example cue the dog to sit, mark, and reward. Rinse and repeat until the dog understands the marker.

Start with times you know your dog is most likely to go to the bathroom when taken outside. When they go mark and reward. Do this consistently until you feel the dog understands that going to the bathroom outside is what's being rewarded.

Name your cue. I personally use "potty" but it can be whatever you want. Right before they are about to go say the cue. When they go, mark and reward. Again, consistency is key. How long you do this depends on the dog and how fast they pair the verbal cue with the action.

Next put it on cue. I typically do this by taking the dog when they most likely need to go, but not urgently. I say the cue while they're sniffing but not having displayed literal about to go signs. As soon as they go, mark and reward. In the beginning I give a lead time and so may wait a few minutes for them to go after being given the cue. If I've given the cue and they don't go within a reasonable time, we go back inside and the dog goes in the crate or a confined area I know they won't have an accident in. Wait five minutes, then bring them back out and cue again.

Once they have it on cue I use it to make sure the dog relieves themself before going into a space I definitely don't want them going to the bathroom. For instance if we're going into a building I'll have the dog go right before we enter.

The other thing I do, specifically for males who pee multiple times before being empty, is give them ample time to sniff and go outside. I also watch them carefully for signs that they are looking to go again and hustle them outside. This builds a history of them knowing I'm going to take them out to go.

For example - I get to agility class fifteen minutes early and let Forte sniff around, pee on everything (within reason) and poop before going inside to class. After his first run we go back outside so he can pee again. There are times when we run twice in a row so he's technically not going outside after his first run. But he is conditioned to know that he'll taken outside once we leave the ring. This has lead to no marking or inappropriate peeing in the ring, even when another dog does it in the run before us or he runs after a BIS has been on the course.

Hopefully this is helpful. Feel free to ask questions.

[bionicle-ramblings]

Something I wish was touched on more in the books:

Vakama's mathematics skills. We know all Ta-Matoran are mathematicians, which they needs to be so they get the right angles and measurements for masks, and we know math for them is like a second language

Imagine if, while the Toa Metru are in the archives due to the flood, someone asks how big the archives really are. Whenua says they span across Onu-Metru, mostly, but there are some linked to other Metrus. When asked about the size in miles, EVERYONE is shocked to hear Whenua AND Vakama answer, the two also surprising each other because they get the same answer. Whenua asks how Vakama knows and Vakama admits he just estimated how long the tunnel they were in was, then estimated the size of Onu-Metru and some other Metrus like Ga-Metru and even the Coliseum, and then converted the feet into miles. Everyone has their reactions. Onewa is quietly impressed and annoyed at having a sometimes genius on his team, Matau thinks Vakama is a nerd but is trying not to fall head over heels, Nokama and Nuju are impressed, and Whenua has some more respect for Vakama

Imagine Matau, Nokama, and Vakama seeing the squad of Vahki in Po-Metru and when Matau says there are hundreds, Vakama murmurs that it's actually just two hundred and fifteen. Cue some, "For real? Right now?" Eyesnfrom Matau and Nokama before Vakama gives his plan for how they get past them

Imagine if, during the Hordika arc, in the way Bomonga uses the archives and the knowledge of them to help Whenua not give in to his urges, Norik does a similar thing by wondering what angles the rafters are on from where he and Vakama are standing. Vakama, knee deep in his pain and despair, doesn't want to indulge the Rahaga's "nonsense," but Norik plays coy and half-lies that he's a little rusty on his math and just wants to see if his guess is a good one. Vakama relents and gives the angle as they walk. Rinse and repeat with Vakama growing more reluctant to partake in Norik's game, but Norik ultimately reveals that he's only doing it because he knows it'll help them both; rather than stewing in something emotional and digging a hole that can't be climbed out of, focusing on something more cognitive like the mathematics that comes so easily to Ta-Matoran and Ta-Metru locals will help Vakama focus because he will not be able to save anyone, let alone himself, if he's mulling over what's happened to him and what he did to cause it. After a while of more walking, Vakama, seeing Norik stop by a statue, asks NORIK if he knows the height of the statue, getting petty because he suspects Norik was possibly BS-ing and genuinely curious to see what Norik still knows, and Norik admits he has an estimate, and that's based off of how tall a Toa is and how many of a single Toa it would take to be as tall as the statue. When Norik gives his answer, he asks Vakama about his method of estimating and how it compares. Vakama, not to gloat, uses a similar method, but it's based on how tall a Matoran is and how many Matoran heigh it is. Regardless, the two get a similar answer, as Vakama "swotches" to Norik's method and gets an answer close to what Norik had. It's Norik's turn to try and not gloat, as he asks Vakama how he feels, now that he's more or less been distracted. Vakama, realizing he got played, begrudgingly admits he does feel a little bit better, but doesn't appreciate being tricked. Norik only tells him that he didn't really trick Vakama, just gave him a tool to help him, if he needs it

Imagine, while he sees the horde of visorak, Sidorak gives the number of roughly a thousand, but when his back is turned, Vakama says there's actually MORE than a thousand, much to the surprise of Roodaka. He doesn't give his reason for how he knows, only saying he just does

Idk, I just love the idea of Vakama being so attuned with math, mainly because I hate math🤣

[writing-whump]

Nightmare

Isaiah is sick after a nightmare. Cue some fluff and comfort from Seline. Warning for emeto.

Isaiah was pretty sure their pack was ruined before it even formed. And that he had ruined his chances with Seline.

Since that difficult afternoon, things have changed between the trio. Matthew and Seline apologized to each other right away - her for not letting them know earlier of having guests over and him for scaring her. They both acknowledged partial guilt for the incident and resolved to be more tolerant in the future.

Seline promised to always message them if someone came over and ideally warn them a few days in advance. Matthew expressed deep regret over raising his shadow at her and promised he would never hurt her no matter how angry he was and reassured he wasn't being angry with her in the first place.

This did not, however, achieve the effect Isaiah had hoped for.

Seline was cold and avoiding them. She would greet them and act politely, but she hurried over to the second floor to her room any chance she got, excusing herself from sharing meals with them. She waited until they left in the morning to come down, came home late and her answers to any initiations or invitations were "don't know if I'll have time yet". Which Isaiah knew was a lie, cause she kept a calendar for months in advance and because her assistant job was flexible and confusing to understand without it.

Matthew and Isaiah both had an unspoken agreement to initiate contact on neutral ground in the shared spaces only. The second floor became Seline's exclusive territory - her room, her personal boundaries and her safe space. They were not going to breach it without explicit invitation, hoping to soothe her that way.

Except the invitation never came.

Isaiah didn't think it was necessarily him she was avoiding, but since he had comforted Matthew, shared a room with him and tried to mediate their first apologetic interaction after the incident, he had inevitably taken "his" side and fallen into the "enemy" camp.

He shouldn't have been explaining so hard that wolves needed their territory and were touchy about new wolves that invaded it without warning and that the whole thing would have been much easier if they had just become a pack. His suggestion was met with a disbelieving stare, asking him if he was insane. Yeah, he should have held his mouth shut.

But he couldn't precisely abandon Matthew to the issue either.

Isaiah got to know Matthew's stress reactions very intimately in the following weeks. Matthew asked him to train with him outside of their sparring for fun to work on his shadow's temper. He also kept up with his daily runs, waking up even earlier to go to the gym and do some boxing workouts before and after school. When he got home, the redhead usually switched on their Google Chrome on the smart TV, a clear indication he was open to having a movie night, whatever anyone picked.

Their evenings looked exactly the same since. Seline declined his offer to watch something without even giving him a look or a thought. Matthew promptly dosed off, only to stumble over to bed around midnight and get up at 4 am again for his run. Rinse, repeat.

Matthew's stress reaction was to sleep and be quiet. Coaxing a conversation out of him took a herculean effort. Then again, he could also be exhausted from all the additional workouts. Isaiah thought Matthew was working on the issue diligently and seriously enough to win some sympathy points, but Seline seemed set on not seeing any effort Matthew was making.

He also thought she had come a bit calmer from her visits to her mom over the weekend. Except afterward, she started going home every weekend, sometimes even taking Fridays and Mondays free to go home sooner. Completely shutting them down.

This left Isaiah alone in a very tense and silent apartment. He hadn't realized before how much he looked forward to coming home after they started living together. How much he cherished the afternoons cooking for everyone or sharing a glass of wine with Seline to talk over progress on their respective research projects. Or the way they would debate and laugh about movies, always switching in introducing their favourite ones to each other. He missed Matthew's good-hearted grumpiness and Seline's playful complaints and the heated discussion about that or another scene. It really felt like a home, in a way the empty vast place he had before never did.

Now living in polite charming illusions he knew alright and he hated them. Masks may have been his thing, but he only became what he wanted to be, what he wanted people to hear - because he genuinely wanted to give them something and not because he was hiding what he knew was terrible to do to someone else. His masks were heartfeltly crafted pieces of art, of himself, of things he was shaping himself to become.

But whatever this terrible silent tension was, it was too close to home in an unexpected way.

Maybe that was when the nightmares started. The foreboding feeling came right in the evening, his stomach feeling like it was hanging on water as he watched Matthew turn his face into the pillow and Seline gathering food to eat in her room, so she wouldn't have to spend even that minimal time with them.

Retiring to their shared room with Matthew didn't help much either, cause he couldn't sleep and when he did, he dreamed. He wasn't sure what he dreamed about, just that he woke up confused, nauseated and sweaty and like he didn't get any rest at all.

Matthew's sleep was very deep though. Nothing seemed to wake him once he was out, so Isaiah at least didn't have to worry about his night terrors being witnessed.

It was the same that night as well.

Isaiah woke around 3 in the morning, sweaty and breathing hard from a dream he didn't want to remember. A string of faces of all the people he had failed, that he had left behind. Familiar enough.

Except now Seline's and Matthew's faces showed up there too.

He must have had a real heavy dinner today, cause he wasn't just feeling vaguely nauseated. His mouth was actively flooded with saliva and gulping down just made his stomach twist more.

Isaiah scrambled from the bed as fast and queit as he could, though Matthew didn't even stir, and headed for the sanctuary of the bathroom.

He turned on the light, closed the door and dropped to his knees in front of the toilet. His stomach was in turmoil, roiling restlessly inside him. The nausea felt like claws, black and long running up his back and Isaiah leaned over the toilet, bracing against the rim.

Taking deep breaths didn't seem to help at all. He let drool drip from his parted lips, when a sudden heave surprised him. His whole body rocked and vomit rushed out of him, hot and thick. The horrible guttural sound accompanying it was even worse.

He took some more breaths, but they were coming fast and shallow. His stomach hurt and twisted further and he knew this wasn't the end. Another terrible sound came and another thick wave of vomit with it, chunks of undigested rice and meat from dinner spluttering noisly against the water.

This was horrible and intense and he didn't even understand the cause! Surely his stomach wasn't so weak as to react to stress that wasn't even rightfully his.

His stomach shot up his throat again, but he managed to swallow it down this time, moaning the bitter taste burned his throat. Isaiah let his head fall down against his folded hand on the toilet, exhausted to the bones.

Time seemed to have stopped and slowed down at the same time. The nausea was still there, not as intense, but ever present, so he didn't dare to leave his post. His shirt was cold and sticky with sweat, making him shiver. He should buy a thicker carpet in front of the toilet, this one did miserable job sparing his knees...

The door creaked open. Isaiah didn't feel like lifting his head, it seemed to weigh a ton.

A hesitant gentle hand touched his upper back.

The contact felt electrifying, his head finally shooting up to see Seline kneeling next to him, bathrobe open around her blue PJs.

"Oh," he creaked, his voice hoarse. "Hey." Just when he thought the night couldn't be any worse.

"Hey yourself," she said, not letting her hand fall. "What's wrong with you? Are you sick?"

"It's nothing. Had a nightmare. Nothing serious." He let his head dropped back against his folded elbow, wanting to hide. He always felt like hiding when he felt like crap. Especially from her.

"A nightmare can make you this sick?" Seline asked, horrified. "What was it about?"

Isaiah made a helpless gesture up with his free hand, then let it fall limply beside him again.

"Go to sleep, please. Nothing fun to see here."

She reached behind him to flush the toilet. Isaiah reddened at the reminder he forgot to do it himself.

Seline rubbed his back slowly, feeling him tense and shiver as she touched the sweaty stains. "Anything I can do?"

"Just go back to sleep," he said quietly, not wanting to argue. Why did she always have to see him at his most disgusting and pathetic? Why couldn't he just be his normal, strong, tidy self, like he could with everyone else? Couldn't she come down from her fortress during the day, when he was fine and in control?

The anxiety spiked a reaction in his stomach. He groaned as the nausea made him shudder and he leaned over the toilet again, spitting into it. His stomach roiled in preparation like he was on a boat.

"Please leave, Seline. I don't feel good," he warned, brows furrowed as he rode out the next wave. His teeth clapped together, but he didn't think that would help.

"That's okay, I don't mind."

"Seline-"

"You can't seriously expect me to leave you here like this-"

Isaiah wanted to argue that was exactly what he wanted her to do, when the new wave of puke had him heaving over the toilet violently. He braced against the rim with both hands, mind going blank as his body purged in several waves after each other, leaving him breathless.

He lifted a little, his hands hurting from the coldness digging into his palms. This was so humiliating...

It was then that he noticed the warm presence against his back. Seline had her forehead pressed to his shoulder blade, hands digging into the fabric of his shirt from behind.

"Please, don't send me away. I want to help you," she said.

He reached for toilet paper, wiping his mouth clean of the drool and sighed heavily. "I don't want you to see me in this state."

"Why can't you let other people help you? Why can't I help you?" Peaking up from her place against his back, she added in a smaller voice: "Why do you not want me here?"

He couldn't stand the hurt in her voice, like he had somehow put it there. "Because I want to be perfect for you and this is the exact opposite of it," he said in exasperation.

The silence that followed was deafening. It made him realize what a terrible thing he had just said.

Isaiah groaned, pushing his face against the inside of his elbow again. "I'm so sorry."

"For what? Saying that you like me?" she said in a stunned voice.

"Yes. No. I'm sorry I said it here, at such a disgusting place and at such stupid time. I had a whole plan of how-"

"Shhhhhh," she said, leaning against him again. He could feel the place where she buried her face into him burning through his shirt. "It's alright."

"But you-"

"I like you too."

It was his turn to be stunned. He blinked, hoisting himself up, trying to turn enough to look at her.

"And you help us with embarrassing, stupid stuff all the time," she said quickly, "so it's no fair to try to prevent us from doing the same."

"This is such a terrible confession," he said, raising an eyebrow at her. She leaned back as well to meet his eyes. Despite what he said, her blushing cheeks, her tangled hair in a loose ponytail, her eyes flashing with indignation - he thought he never saw anything more beautiful.

"Shut up! I thought you would never say anything."

"I was waiting for your signals!" he protested, "I wasn't going to force-"

"Signals? I was giving you plenty. You think it's easy for a girl not to look like she is chasing the man-"

Isaiah chuckled. He was freezing, his mouth surely smelled terrible, just like the whole bathroom and it was almost 4 am and there they were, arguing. His chest felt so light and fluttery though like not in several weeks. Not since the argument.

Seline's eyes widened in surprise as she tipped back against the wall, watching him. "Hahaha. Glad you are feeling so much better."

Isaiah ran a hand through his hair. "I'm still very sorry."

"If you apologize one more time, I'm going to hit you," she threatened. He wondered how exactly she was going to do that, when he was the one trained in martial arts and with a deadly shadow.

Her hand reached forward to press against his forehead, gently brushing some hair out of its way. "You don't have a fever."

"I told you. It's just stress," he deadpanned. But he truly was feeling a lot better. His throat was still raw and his stomach was tender, but he didn't feel the weight gnawing him or the nausea at his spine. He allowed himself to lean a bit into her touch, eyes closing momentarily against the exhaustion that hit him as a ton of bricks.

Seline rocked closer to him again, face almost touching his neck.

"Stop that," he chided in a resigned tone. "I'm disgusting."

"You better stop with that talk," she said. He blushed, squirming self-consciously as her hand slid from his forehead to his cheek. "I couldn't find you disgusting if I tried," she whispered.

He wrinkled his nose in disbelief, but he was too tired and confused from the adrenaline crash to argue further.

Seline leaned away, but tugged at his sleeve. "Come up to my room to sleep with me?"

Isaiah forgot about the embarrassment entirely. "Oh?"

Seline's whole face reddened, waving her hand at him adorably. "Not like that! Just...I thought it might help against the nightmares. If you want."

Isaiah watched her in amusement, realizing slowly what she had just offered. Breaching the ban. She just invited him over to her room, her territory, her kingdom.

He smiled at her, blinking tiredly. "I would like that."

---

@bellysoupset

[monstermoviedean]

it's honestly beyond wild how easily dean lets cas off for some pretty irredeemable, unforgiveable stuff with no understanding or even acknowledgement on cas' part of the kind of incredible actual-no-strings gift he's been given (and thrown away, rinse, repeat). i can appreciate the take that it just goes to show how deeply braindead in love dean is (and i might still be able to find the romance in it if there was ever any kind of equal or at least comparable weight on cas' end) but he can do (and has done) (and deserves) so much better! rip!! on a list of all dean's boyfriends ranked in order of how well they treated him cas would come in dead last.. can't even rate him over the ones that tried to kill dean because uh cas has not only done that too but also done that more than most (without even factoring in the mind control) lol wanky maybe but that doesn't make it untrue womp womp

anyway the trap effectively killed many of my charitable feelings for cas and despair took care of much of the rest. i know you're not there yet and still manage some warmth for cas besides (plus my post s15 cas/destiel opinions probably trend significantly more harshly than even the rare and wonderful few who have been openly critical of both that aren't br*nly/c*sties, i can acknowledge that lol) but after the trap and knowing what's still to come, it's very difficult for me to see cas-as-dean's-endgame being a positive thing for dean. that may be what he wants but like please for the love @ him: want better!!! i mean, s6 was tough but also so crunchy and opened the door for a world of (tragically unrealized) possibilities. the shadow that s15 and everything leading up to it casts over all of that is just.. so so long. there's been so many opportunities for cas to be better and he just. wastes them.

i'm so interested to see what your takeaway from despair is because it left me feeling kind of hollow on destiel and deeply skeptical of cas when stacked up against everything else. cas may be in love with his idea of dean but he's proven over and over again that he's either incapable of or unwilling to be and see dean as an equal, loving partner. idk if it's a fault in the writing (feels like a cop out to pin things on that though, especially when cas is actually written fairly consistently compared to most other characters) or just that mc isn't as dynamic/effective an actor as jackles but i find myself less and less convinced of cas' sincerity as time goes on. he's wildly selfish. i think it's far easier to make the argument in canon that everything he's done, including that confession, has been far more selfishly motivated than motivated by any genuine love or care for dean (or jack for that matter). maybe an uncharitable assessment, but not an unfounded one.

what dean says about angel's caring and cas playing sorry in 7x21 and cas insisting he's "a lot like people" to rowena's (very apt) assessment of him in 10x22 are always top of my mind when i try to make sense of cas in the aftermath. he's not sorry, he's playing sorry. he's not people, he's performing people. angels don't have souls and i'm not sure i really buy grace as a substitute but, even if i did, cas' has been waning for a very long time (which i wish had been explored more considering all of the weight the canon puts on having a soul). cas isn't that far removed from donatello who, in his soullessness, turned to mr rogers for behavioral cues. cas holds dean in that role, he's just not especially good at emulating him. or maybe just doesn't understand what it is he should be emulating. all of that to say that i really, truly believe cas wants to feel people feelings (feelings is dean as people is dean as humanity is dean etc etc etc), i'm just not sure if i buy that it's ever more than performance for him.

like fanfic is great, i love fanfic! post s15 fix-its moving further and further away from the "dean pulls his head out of his ass" model is such a gift!! but in actual canon?? ough. cas' very long, very well established patterns make canon destiel a super hard sell for me in a post s15 world. there's no reason to believe that things would ever change because, to the bitter end(?), they never did.

anyway anyway, i'm sorry for using your inbox as a rantbox and i fully understand if you ignore this, i know parts of it might be kind of a powder keg lol it's hard to not be cynical and frustrated by so much squandered potential i suppose, especially when so much of the fandom popular opinions on these things have been just so. bad and wrong. for so long. it's been a relief to see some of those tides turning as more people revisit the source material, though! please just know that i really have enjoyed following along on your rewatch and appreciate how much thought and care you put into understanding this show and these characters. i'm looking forward to seeing where what's left of the journey takes you!

there are some points here i agree with and some i don't, but i can entirely see where you're coming from. i just want to extend some love to you because yeah, sometimes this story is really incredibly frustratingly sad and bleak. also no need to apologize, i love inbox rants <3

i'm publishing this because i think there are a lot of interesting points of discussion about cas and his relationship with dean. blanket statement for anyone who might read it: i am not interested in cas-bashing or anon-bashing. don't do that here. or anywhere, frankly.

to start off: it IS beyond wild that dean lets cas off for some things. breaking sam's wall is the first example that comes to mind. i mean wow, good for dean for being the bigger person and forgiving there, but holy shit.

i'm gonna politely disagree with you on cas treating dean badly. i do see where you're coming from! this is something i've talked about before re: cas actually - that sometimes the way dean treats cas is viewed as poor treatment, but in actuality cas doesn't receive it that way at all. so cas' tendency to put the mission first, for example, is something that dean GETS. dean doesn't feel like cas is neglecting him by doing this. i think there are also circumstances in which cas' actions are understandable, even if i don't like them. and a lot of the "constant apocalypse" problems lead to responses that don't have a real-world equivalent. all that being said, i think one thing cas could fix/address is answering his phone when dean calls him.

on dean doing better - i think people in dean's life could and should treat him better. i also think he loves and cares about those people and would not trade them out, and i respect that.

on cas being better - mixed feelings on this. i totally understand where you're coming from and don't want to invalidate you here or at any point! i think cas is trying to be better. i think he's locked into a pattern where he only sees one option for being better - fixing things / getting wins / sacrificing himself / otherwise protecting dean and sparing dean harm. i feel for him there, i really do. smarter people than me have pointed to heaven brainwashing/upbringing as the reason this pattern exists. so i don't expect him to break out of that pattern, but i do think it's reasonable to wish he had come to recognize that this DOES harm dean. i think cas often believes he knows how dean feels. sometimes he's right, sometimes he's wrong. and in this case while dean can understand why cas is doing what he's doing and respect his decisions enough to not put up a fight about them, it does hurt dean to watch cas walk away into certain danger over and over. it especially hurts when dean has no power in the situation and is left with nothing to do but to hope cas comes back.

so i have actually seen 15x18 and have some feelings about it but i don't want to comment until i see it again. i know i missed a ton of context the first time i watched it (november 6 2020 after not having watched the show in a few years), and i'm interested to see how my interpretation changes!

one opinion i have that i don't think will change: i believe cas' pattern of keeping secrets to protect dean, then having those secrets blow up, causing dean pain and/or causing cas to leave, is not disrupted. i believe 15x18 reinforces this pattern, in fact. and i do not like that. i do appreciate that cas did it for love and he was backed into a horrible corner, and at the same time, from dean's perspective, it's another example of cas leaving.

on cas not seeing dean as an equal partner. hoooo boy, this one gave me pause. i am very conflicted about this, to be honest. i think cas THINKS he sees dean as an equal partner, but i'm not sure he actually does. i'm also not sure he treats him like one. consistently, at least. i think they're equals when they're dealing with "ordinary" problems (monsters, people), but when the problems are angel-level or higher, i think cas thinks he has more ability to solve those problems than dean does. sometimes he's right (cas should be the one talking to michael in 15x08, for example). but not always. and i could see that coming across as patronizing. i want to think more about this one!

on cas' selfishness. this is tough because i think cas is trying to be selfless in a way that comes across as selfish. he wants to be the hero. he believes he can be the hero. he wants to spare others from being the hero. and while that's usually well-intentioned (taking on burdens so others don't have to), it can read as "no one else is capable of this but me." and i think the major problem is that cas looks at things from a 30,000-foot level. he is often less concerned with the ground-level impacts. so when he's, idk, saying yes to lucifer, he's thinking "someone has to and it may as well be me" but he's not thinking "oh shit dean is going to have to watch lucifer parade me around and then kill me." while i understand his reasoning in these high-stakes no-win situations and i'm not mad about it, i do wish he would consider the impacts of his small decisions on others more often. sorry to bring up the phone thing again but it's the best example i've got - it would be nice if cas made it more of a priority to answer his phone when dean calls because it's important to dean, even if it isn't important to cas. it will help dean feel more secure and they will have a nice conversation because they enjoy talking to each other. we have hints of this kind of thing happening but i would like to see it more clearly and consistently. or like. icing sam out during the rupture was pretty shitty. he could have at least texted back. (yes he was in a bad spot, no he doesn't have to respond to sam all the time, but a little 'i'm not dead' text would have made a big difference)

i think "uncharitable but not unfounded" is very understandable. i, personally, believe cas loves and cares about dean. i also could come up with some examples of cas' actions that, regardless of intent, communicate to dean that this is not true. i think if you want to make a case that cas doesn't care, you can. i wouldn't agree with it, and i think there's a better case that cas does care, but i do recognize that the show itself leaves that door open. and it does bother me. i would feel better if cas showed more consistent and obvious care for dean TO dean.

i think cas does confuse/equate feeling guilty with feeling sorry. i think he does both, but sometimes he is playing sorry. i think his defense of jack at the end of s14 contradicts his claims of being sorry, for example. but i'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he is actually sorry most of the other times.

on cas' feelings - i see where you're coming from, and i disagree here. i think cas does have feelings, even if he doesn't always know what they are or how to process them. someone (i think ilarual?) made a cool post about cas growing a soul that i thought was a neat idea. but i can certainly sympathize with wanting the show to do more with angels, grace, angel feelings, etc.

i do believe cas is sincere in his care and in wanting to do better, and that's one reason i have faith in dean and cas being able to work it out and be good for each other! i think that's a major difference between our perspectives. and i don't have an answer here, because again, i see where you're coming from. if you're open to it, i might suggest considering cas' actions from a perspective that he's 100% sincere 100% of the time. it might be interesting to try, even if it doesn't change your opinions at all (and you definitely don't have to try it or change your opinions).

one million billion trillion percent agree on squandered potential. there are so many problems we've discussed here that i think could be fixed with attention and goodwill. but will they be fixed? sigh. i don't know. i like to believe so, but cynicism is also a fair response. i think a lot of my feelings come down to this question: if the show had continued, would 15x18 have been a turning point? would it have finally allowed dean and cas to change their relationship? or would it have set it in stone, never to be changed again? i think it's a matter of interpretation. i tend toward the former - that 15x18 would have changed everything and allowed them space to finally get it right - but i can also see why the latter works, especially because the show ending DID set it in stone that way.

it HAS been a relief to see shifts in conversation, and i hope they continue. and thank you so so much for your very kind words! they are not necessary but they are appreciated :) i often feel like i'm just fumbling around in the dark compared to a lot of others, and it's nice to hear i haven't completely mucked it up. also i really enjoyed answering this, so thanks for giving me so much to chew on!

[unusual-raccoon]

okay then i will spam you <3 <3 just thinking about what you said about jace gaslighting lucerys when he starts suspecting jace is his stalker! with the ask i sent you about social media and them, i just feel like Jace would have a private random account that he uses just to follow lucerys and send him the most deranged messages ever. like, he picks lucerys from school one day and sees him flirting with that arryn boy from his bio class. that night, the random anon sends lucerys a lengthy message describing very explicitly and with detail all the ways he could kill the arryn boy and how lucerys was wearing the sweater he sent as a gift so that means lucerys is his and he should know better. lucerys cannot block him because the anon has already told him that he will post all lucerys' private pictures if he tries (jace would never share such pictures anywhere, with anyone, because he doesn't want to cause his baby so much distress and he doesn't want to share lucerys either, but lucerys doesn't know this ofc ;) ).

Oh. OH. Unhinged stalker Jace 🫣. God, he’d be so deranged. Like sending the most long-winded, possessive rants about Luke being his fucking property. And then ten he’d switch apps and text Luke that he forgot his lunch at home💖.

I cannot even imagine how stressed Luke would be though, poor thing. Bet you the only thing keeping him from having a whole breakdown is being able to spend time with Jace 👀.

Also sorry if the social media angle wasn’t what you hoped, I was trying to keep it generic! But yeah, stalker!Jace would have an account to (lovingly) harass Luke. Also, yeah those nudes are fucking hard earned (and ofc they’re of his bby he’d rather die than let anyone else see them)

Maybe the minute Luke starts to connect the dots his stalker sends him a photo of Jace, like sleeping or just something candid. However it’s proof that his stalker has access to the people (the person™️) that he cares about more than anything.

Cue Luke being extra paranoid and SO attached. He’d bust right through their adjoining bathroom and ask Jace is he can spend the night. Threatening someone he cares about brings out another side of Luke (I’m looking at you Aemond 😌).

The gifts might eventually become more sexual - like yes the previous gifts were possessive and suggestive, and yes he’s sent compromising, reputation-shattering images of himself, but sex toys are another ball game for him.

Remote. control. vibrator 🫣 - it’s really his pièce de résistance, at least Jace happens to think so.

Luke would rather eat glass than put that thing anywhere near him, but his stalker sends a message and another photo of Jace. So, Luke agrees to do what his stalker wants.

Jace edging himself all day while Luke is at school and playing with the vibrator’s setting via an app on his phone. Cranking up the speed and slowing it down in long intervals. Dragging the dial to the max for brief 3 second pulses and Luke is utterly sobbing in the bathroom, resigned to failing his bio test because there’s NO way he can go back to class

He’d take his sleeping meds after scrubbing himself raw in the shower, crawling into bed with Jace, and knocking out - rinse and repeat.

[shadowcatzone]

1.xingyue child: here's this giant powerful opponent they sent to kill the general. i'm gonna prove myself using that. *sneaking out to take it on despite the others clearly being in the middle of coming up with a strategy*

2.the old men™ (aka whatever remains of the hcq) realising xingyue child is trying to take on giant abomination by themself. Running after them.

3.xingyue child honestly putting up a good fight until they forget about one(1) thing dangerous about that abomination. Or throwing caution in the wind to begin with idk. Almost gets killed/grievously wounded.

4.hcq (aka the old men™) stepping in, killing the bad evil powerful abomination in a single hit. The others keeping xingyue child safe from attacks/debris/falling abomination.

5.oh you are in so much trouble young man/woman/n/a . Cue lecturing. From four three people, while jingliu stands, unsettlingly, and nods after every point being made.

6.xingyue child won't do it again. *teary eyed* they're "so sowwy. I pwomise i leawned my lesson"

7.cue next time. Rinse and repeat.

Bonus step 7.5 dragging yanqing into it, although he should know better than to listen to xingyue child.

[mooniety]

sometimes when i see how a lot of people interpret susie being a girlboss & still a big bad, i worry that my own interpretations may be a bit too out of character, so here's my interpretation!

i want to make her conflicted, feel constantly ostracized, naive, overly defensive, anxiety ridden, lack an understanding of modern social cues, have a witty sort of awkwardness, & waste literal days doing heavy research on how to make friends only to later realize that said research was wildly incorrect & unnecessary to a humorous degree

she's definitely intelligent, but getting 100s on all of your exams doesn't exactly equate to being the most street smart, i'd say she's the equivalent of an overly sheltered stem kid, perhaps even a madonna of some sorts - work is the only thing & friend she knows

even if she's lived in a pseudo hell for what i imagine was a majority of her life, despite the largely popular idea that she fought back with the hopes to just live another day, what if she instead hid like a coward the entire time & ate whatever scraps she could find after the persecutors finally left? after all, she didn't come back home with many physical scars, if any at all

& despite being disgustingly rich, her wealth is just a shield - classism as a form of confidence she aggressively douses herself in like gasoline to hide all of the mental trauma she's obtained over the past years, shown through an immature mindset of how wealth is spent: ugly items she purchases because it has easily recognizable luxury branding displayed all across it, stupidly big gold diamond jewelry you'll never see her wear because it goes against work policy, & expensive food & drink that is specifically popular on social media platforms when it barely fills her nor really fit her tastes

yet, she manages to hide this all, gatekeeping her true emotions with a ridiculously arrogant, nefarious crackle she's been taught through multiple encounters with others will basically guarantee her a 100% chance of escaping her current situation, fancy yet crude teases & remarks built from words she doesn't understand the true impact of, & a simple venomous smile. she's on the verge of breaking, but you wouldn't even know it.

everything about her is running away. hiding. fearing. cowering. crying. begging. rinse & repeat.

she's a liar to herself & everyone around her-- & she knows it.

she's definitely still morally ambiguous, don't get me wrong - good, heartfelt, maybe even heroic intentions, disgustingly horrible & overly grandiose ways of carrying them out, but no matter what, she's still a coward at the end of the day

she's a young girl stuck in an adult woman's body - forever stuck in the past yet forced to live in the present

she's no black swan. she's the purest, most innocent, white swan you've ever laid your eyes on. & if you've seen the swan lake, you know how it ends - a tragedy.

maybe someday she'll gain the confidence she needs to get over her fears, but for now, she's nothing but a coward that desperately clings onto her wealth as if it were a white knight in shining armor. maybe that's why a lot of people like to headcanon that she has a massive crush on meta knight. but hey, i'm guilty of that too.

anyways she's still best girl of 2024-beyond because i have a thing for villainesses, please don't ask me further about that part... ^^;

tl;dr: my headcanon for susie is not very girlboss but instead a wimpy rich chick, & i REVEL in that.

[spiderh0rse]

arlen's mind notes! all ten episodes in here, mostly because i don't feel like splitting them up at All. w/e we vibe

e1

oh i HATE that alarm

does Not remember the prior night

,,,shares a room with Barney. gazes sidelong at Ryan. who says the same "I'm not his dad" thing. Only two beds in the room. What Is Going On Here.

Lives on-site, keeps his gun in his room. The room is pitifully small for two.

The background music is diagetic.

Thinks he may hate mornings more than anyone else in the world

The sink doesn't turn on but there Is a pool of water not draining from the sink. Rinses his hands in that.

Apparently slept in his uniform.

The vending machine ate his money D: At least tries to get breakfast.

Slur count one.

beeps out the swears but not the slur. Okay.

Complains about the ramp in the dorms. Says they won't have any handicapped security guards, and it's only guards and scientists in that specific hall. Clearly does not know about Keller.

Lampshades the Rescas ahead of time

Does seem to have a unique model.

Not a computer expert, he just presses keys and they work

New security guard swagger Disgusts him

falls asleep at his post

One of the other people at his station is named C.J.

INCREDIBLY concerned at a helicopter exploding and killing people right next to him, as well as some aliens arriving. Reasonable response!

Calls for backup.

middle initial is J!

A C G and F all have been giving reports of aliens

Kate is in Sector F

ah his name is spelled Tod. One d.

e2

maintains what I'd consider realistic reactions to corpses and aliens

inspects a dead vortigaunt

very sharp reflexes

screams when he sees zombies unexpectedly

Figures out the mechanics of the headcrabs but refuses to linger on it

calls some pipes gay??

finds the room that had music going. There's a lot of beds in here.

mumbling SO badly. I can barely hear him

stops to watch a zombie fiddle with a vending machine before killing it

shoots a vending machine for soda!

"sprite is fucking awesome"

slur count TWO

shoots a box open. Three boxes

delighted to have a shotgun. Considers himself invincible while having one

SUDDENLY REMEMBERS KATE

the instinct of every mindverse character: wait for the houndeye to finish charging up and get ear blasted

the houndeye very well may have ruptured his kidney. He keeps going around like that anyways

pool cue weapon,, does he know how fragile those things are? Very! I love pool.

seems to casually call things gay as an insult

questions half the things he says making sense

gets electrocuted and complains loudly about the pain

he wants to break physics too!

busts into the women's washroom with no comment

seems to think he's at risk of a heart attack if he doesn't calm down

e3

"okay, I'm calm now i think. I hope." Chat, I don't think he's calm

repeating to himself to be calm, calm... Briefly interrupts with a I WANT TO KILL EVERYBODY and then calms right back down

finds the target range calming. Possibly because of the ammo

"not barely anything"

takes the alien issue as an excuse to go into places he's not meant to be

"security... is everyone's job" enters the security only room

absolutely delighted to use grenades at any opportunity

watches the nature channel. Frequently sees thing spraying goo everywhere

just. So lame. He's great.

tells a door closing on him is Not Polite

PAC MAN

ARCADE IN THIS PLACE FUCK YES

he isn't sure if he wants to be upset over the money wasted on the arcade or that He wasn't invited in

he is working on a gun that he seems to think needs replacing

despite asking for a replacement two months ago, he has not been Issued the replacement gun

seems to enjoy talking through the things he's physically doing

FLYING HEADCRAB

has schizophrenia and admits it acts up sometimes. Mmmmay be another joke? Feels literal to me.

wonders what a barnacle will do to him if he touches it

jeez he can kill a barnacle with a single pool cue hit

gets headaches after being choked

stresses to the soldiers that he is Not evil, it's. It's Him. Tod Jarley Arlen. Says that's not actually his name he's just very scared.

cuts a couple gs off the end of his words

delights in gunning down the soldiers while it's happening (seems very mad they're trying to kill him) but follows it up with

"I just killed two people. That's nice to know. I'm going to hell."

e4

describes himself as a "homicidal maniac" and says it's going to be hard to take that in

seems to be in shock, actually!

avoids killing the next soldiers he comes across and just Runs

hits his nose trying to get into a vent

thinks he broke his nose!

he is still trying to forget that he's murdering people

immediately has to kill more soldiers. Plaintively expresses that this Isn't fun and he Doesn't like murdering people

thinks watching the blood splatter is fun. Immediately asks what's wrong with him

turret. He officially loves his life

happy to destroy the turret!

the cliffside is Also not fun!

usually flat affect except when his life is in active danger

wishes Kate was here :(

has played Minecraft! Which. Was first made playable by the public in 2009. Full release was 2011, I think.

gman!! Tod knows him! He's seen him, anyways. Tod doesn't want a thing to do with him, "even if it is an alien apocalypse." Clearly has some understanding of what he is.

if he misses an exit behind a door he's going to cry

you just shot a SNOT MONSTER, sir

sounds like he's about to cry when he finds a body a bullsquid tore up

tells things to go to hell pretty frequently

tad hurt by falling from a height

doesn't hesitate overmuch to do something dangerous when it's his only option

OH. oh he has BADLY injured his legs that sounded deeply unpleasant

laughs a bit while in pain

okay the way this mod is made he is blatantly taking hits but doesn't comment at all so we shall just kindly hold kayfabe

seems less bothered by killing people right now. Course corrects from wanting people to approach him to telling himself to calm down

doesn't actually Want to become a homicidal maniac

e5

HE-ROLLED

just keeps using grenades every chance he gets. I don't blame him the blast radius on these are NUTS

"on three. One. Three!"

never learned how to use the railcars

amazed at the car's still functioning after multiple explosions

pondering the implications of the aliens overrunning Black Mesa despite their heavy armemants

always thought conspiracy theorists were idiots

very happy that he Isn't a conspiracy theorists

yells at himself to Wake Up just. To test if he's asleep. Doesn't seem too bothered that he isn't

BULLSQUID SPIT TO THE EYE. even after it mostly clears his sight is a bit fuzzy

the acid in his eyes hurts more than when he broke his arm. Most pain he's ever been in!

slur count... Stays at two. Barely.

screams and runs from an alien grunt in the MOST visceral and personlike way I've seen ANY mindverse character do

tries so hard to convince himself he's dreaming and that none of this is real. Drops it when he sees someone hurt but possibly not dead

doesn't know if ducks have assholes

no longer remembers the way out after that panic

did NOT realize vortigaunts were lethal enough to explode people

seems to dislike people being quiet all the time

this is the First time he's been bothered by blood, picking something up off the ground

gets a BIG ol infodump of the half life lore

there's some Secret Radio the guards can use to do stuff and. Help people with I guess????

convinced fate wants him dead

deeply afraid of the special forces

Jordan? Whos- OHHH from sector G!

Rachel? Ohhhh she's the onw that exploded

Tod has got to get to the loading bay and warn gordon freeman about. Special forces I think?? What even is this plot

no matter the subject matter, Tod speaks in a very flat manner over the radio

he has been working at Black Mesa for five minutes

very afraid of the entire united states military

OH HEY he's the guard at the end of Apprehension!

that's sick one of the snipers gets him!

e6

impressed by the training course hologram

has no idea how the HEV suit knows his health. Finds it tight. Why is he getting HEV training??

dealt with Positive Parents mail in high school. Poor kids school, he says

"who in the world called running and jumping commands"

ohhhh he's getting training in case scientists trained with it are all too busy for something that needs it

baits someone into thinking of an innuendo. Then makes a yo mama joke

well! Well that wasn't a slur! But it is rude!

think the long jump module looks like a jetpack that goes on his arm

ponders stealing the HEV suit. He likes it.

he is Not jumping onto that target. Misses it instead.

he hates the hologram now >:(

thinks the medkits feel nice. A bit drugged. He's very calm.

tries to crush a roach. They annoy him

sees the intended route and bypasses it

crate madness

thinks he's been hearing scientists crawling through the vents

slenderman reference... First made in 2009. Has never found him scary.

happy to lay hands on a gun. Confused as to why the scientists need guns

very good in the target range. Drops his gun once he's done

hates swimming and being wet

underwater mumbling!!!

thinks having the charging unit right after a bunch of water is a bit foolish

black mesa green goop! Explosion hits him! Incredibly!! Bothered!!!!

goop on his foot

sick the day they were taught how to use the trains

smokes, listens to the radio. Thats his idea of relaxing

plans to kick Barney out for the night, send him to his girlfriend's house.

Barney hates snakes.

e7

oh he's coming back from being shot

where IS he, yeah

they TOOK his RADIO and FLASHLIGHT

YELLING IN PAIN MY FAVOURITE :D

SO scared

snarks towards the military for a bit in anger

knows he can get morphine from the first aid kits but that's not his highest priority

priorities: find gun, get Kate/find car. Whichever of those comes first

yells every time he shoots something right now

getting a bit of an adrenaline rush killing stuff right now. That IS dulling the pain. He wonders if it's bad that he wants to keep that rush going

thinks having an alien as a pet would be sick

vulgar man. Vulgar.

AUGH ALIEN GRUNT. shot BEES at him

sees aliens being gunned down by turrets and decides he Isn't Doing That.

out of ammo... Oh boy.

wants a pet houndeye :> calls them dogs and creepers at once

freaks the fuck out at hearing military radio chatter

didn't realize how much pain he was in until he got painkillers

other than the painkilling seems entirely unaffected by the drugs

no longer avoiding killing people.

slur count three.

cars!!!

"hard as all living cunt" you have a way with words, Arlen

wh. Why is there a dead survey team member out here. why is anyone here wearing an HEV.

has no clue how he's in a relationship with Kate

slur count four.

"what the pancake"

e8

just got hit in the head with a brick because of a FLY

gets higher-pitched when he yells. sounds like most interps of karkat

"beep. Beep. Beep. BEEP." (anger in his heart)

amazed at how fragile black mesa security is

tod arlen says acab! well. well i think he is trying to quote a john mulaney bit but yknow still counts

tells the scientists to pick up guns

"you wouldn't blow up your mother like that!"

got some glass in his arm :( hurts less than the shredded cheese

dry shredded cheese is a deadly weapon

a bit shocked at a talking vortigaunt. wonders if he's going insane. does try to talk back to the guy

oh boy how. how is this plot going

whoevers voicing the the vortigaunts here is great. unless these are voice lines im not familiar with being clipped here? well either way very nice arrangement

hes always been freaked out by corpses but thinks after today that either wont be a problem or hell have ptsd

the scientists expect the security guards to do everything other than science proper.

he did NOT go to enginering school

just keeps knockin back morphine

fails to consider shotguns decreasing accuracy across a distance

shuffles his way along a really small ledge. very good at that! seems to know to keep his center of balance low

doesn't injure himself! woo!

he got called to work on computers in biology once. the scientists there had managed to plug a power strip into itself and were then wondering why it wouldn't work.

oh hey the zombies can open doors

simmons and walter! they have Not heard from Kate :(

weird goop in scientist tubes! does make him feel a bit better after the multiple gunshot wounds

calls simmons "sims" once- twice! more! just very often.

keeps getting syringes of science goop

simmons seems to have been kidnapped. tod hopes he gets out alright.

gets kicked off a platform and takes a head injury. pretty sure.

e9

has adjusted to the cycle of shoot people get shot eventually get knocked out

has no clue what day it is and is very confused overall

very confused about how he isn't dead

wonders vaguely if he's only alive because the alien overlord wants him alive for some reason

"front horse of a macadamia nut"

telling himself to stop thinking logically because it clearly does not mesh with the situation

avoids flickering lights

loud noises make his headache worse

he is just SO uncomfortable

sings Some song about cap guns

forced to stand in front of an eye scanner while getting shot

"that wasn't your average military. that was advanced military"

he makes a ton of very sexual metaphors and only means then that way some of the time

calls himself TJ with the ease of someone who's been called that for much of his life

doctor roleplay,,,,

worries about alien illnesses and if humans can handle the new diseases

it's night! It is Not tomorrow yet

dislikes loud noises right now

OHHHH this is the landing pad from the tram ride in hl1? Maybe? Yeah it is!

explosion RIGHT next to him

he'd rather freeze than burn

e10

WHAT IS THAT VOICE YOU'RE DOING. ARLEN

shocked at how easily he can kill military

slur count four :(

genuinely hopes he isn't god

HES GOT A CHOCOLATE BAR

it's not good chocolate

he. He thinks it's 2016????? Huh??????? Okay that sure is a year.

this room reeks of special forces

YOWLS

I WAS RIGHT IT IS LOUSY WITH NINJAS

Donald Duck noises,,,

can't get his mind off the year, says he can't remember anything other than Black Mesa, isn't sure how long he's been here...

tries to blow up the morphine. It doesn't work.

rationalizes that with everything hes been seeing the past few days being however his brain has been choosing to interpret it all. That's why the clocks don't have hands

"I'M SMARTER THAN YOU, BRAIN. I HAVE A GUN."

ponders that he may actually be in hell. Wonders how he'll bust out if that's the case

giving up on finding Kate. Or despairs that he won't find her

stares at him in the eyes. He is so interesting.

doesn't care about Kate as much as he wants to, but won't pretend he cares more because that'd be lying

scared of his dad. Hated him once

hurt a lot of people while addicted

face-heel turn he's trying to figure out how to get Deeper into hell now

oh man he is deeply suicidal good lord

starts spitting word salad for fun

figures he may as well embrace insanity

rhymes decently well!

mmmm credits

SECRET BONUS - HE'S IN A TUBE I GUESS. UNDERWATER MUMBLING. KATE FISHES HIM OUT AND THEN DOES NOT TALK

[treewithabark]

WOW im really impressed with Juno’s loose leash walking skills. do you mind sharing the method you used to go about getting those results? my puppy Loves to pull and i suck at teaching llw

Ahhh thank you! And YES absolutely!

I will preface this by saying that she does still pull. It’s very much a work in progress, but with consistency (a lot of consistency) she doesn’t choke herself anymore and we are seeing more moments of walking to heel or walking with a beautiful slack lead. We are still actively working on the loose lead walking while out and about.

I’m also very lucky to have some great dogblr friends that I can discuss these things with. And while I was struggling with the training one of them actually walked me through how she teaches loose lead walking and I managed to figure out where I was going wrong in the method.

No one is perfect! And if you’re tackling this on your own without someone to spot you it can be really really easy to make mistakes!

Taking videos of your sessions can be super beneficial for this reason. When you watch them back you can see the training from an outside perspective. I’ve noticed that I talk a lot in my sessions, which can be confusing to the dog. So I’m trying hard to talk less and be clearer in my cues.

What I use;

-A collar - I personally use martingales, I like the wideness of them for comfort and weight distribution, plus the safety of knowing they can’t back out of this style of collar.

-A 6ft snap lead - this can be shorter! But the idea is that it’s a fixed lead, not a flexi that changes length all the time.

-Lots and lots of treats

-Two clear verbal cues

So I use two methods. Circle method, in which I walk Juno around in a circle when she starts pulling, or I change direction with her.

I really love the idea of circle method, I watched a great online seminar about it but I find it really hard to describe it in just writing. I’ll have to see if I can find some sources on it to reblog at another time!

The thing that worked best with Juno though, especially at the beginning, was simply changing direction. This worked best if I didn’t have a route planned ahead. Just keep walking and see where you end up! The first day I really knuckled down on the training, we didn’t even leave my road because she’d pull in all directions before we actually managed to make it somewhere. But that’s okay!

So you leave the house. I try to leave the house first. Not because “hurr durr I’m the alpha” but to start the walk off where she isn’t dragging me out of the door before we’ve really begun.

Pick a direction, start walking. Dog starts to pull. You say “ah ah” (think Victoria Stillwell - a short snappy sound that captures the attention and clearly marks a mistake) and you lead the dog around 180 degrees and start walking the other direction. Calling out “let’s go” to the dog. When the dog follows you in this new direction reward with a treat with your chosen marker. Whether that’s a clicker, or a verbal cue. I use “yes!” As my reward marker.

Rinse and repeat.

Walk, dog pulls, ah ah, change direction, let’s go, yes good girl/boy, treat. You are only moving forward when the dog isn’t pulling.

You might go through a lot of treats in the early stages. That’s also okay!

If the dog is lurching forwards again after taking a single treat from you, you can try tossing the treat on the ground away from you, to the side or slightly behind, so the dog then has to come back to you for another treat while you’re still in their sight.

If you find that your dog is hitting the end of the lead quite hard when they pull forwards, shorten the lead so they have less of a chance to jolt their neck. You don’t want it too short though as the dog needs to be able to feel when the lead is slack, a constant tight lead won’t teach them anything.

Same goes for changing directions, don’t let them hit the end of the lead hard, we want to lead them not play ping pong with our pups. Try and lead them in a semi circle instead of changing direction too rapidly and having them get a sharp tug.

You may have to change direction a LOT. As I said, the first day we didn’t even make it off my road. But once they start to realise that they don’t get anywhere when they pull you should be able to go longer distances without the pulling.

Remember to also mark and reward when they’re not pulling. At the beginning this could be just a few steps. They’ve walked a few metres without pulling? Yes, good dog! Have a treat. Hopefully over time you can go longer without rewarding, say going 15 meters instead of just 5.

The trick with both this method, and the circle method, is that the dog is constantly moving. With constant movement and engagement they have less chance of letting frustration build. While the stop start method (red light green light for some people, stopping dead when the dog pulls) doesn’t allow for that constant movement and lets frustration build up over time instead of letting the dog burn off that excess energy.

You can also start teaching “heel” in quiet spots, like your house, garden, secure areas etc. Juno was learning heel in a tennis court where she could be off lead in a gated area with high fences. And coupled with her loose lead walking I began praising her and rewarding her for heeling when out walking. So if she’s walking with a loose lead but then pulls back to walk in line with me I start heavily praising with “good girl, good heel! Good heel!” Then mark and reward with “yes! Heel!” And deliver the treat. It’s nice to incorporate different parts of your training into one once you have the foundations built separately.

I often see people trying to teach their dogs to walk nice, but all they’re doing is tugging on the lead and saying “no, heel Fido, heel” but it’s clear that the dog doesn’t understand the cue and is just being tugged back into position with no indication that they’re doing the correct thing.

Wow I’m so sorry this turned into a long response and I still had to cut things out! I really hope these ramblings made sense, I’m happy to elaborate further if anything was confusing, or point you towards other blogs that I know can explain it better! I’ll try and grab a video today of the method in action but I’ve found that it’s hard to show with only one hand free.

Big up to @taylor-luna who walked me through her tried and tested method and helped me figure out what wasn’t working! Self training is possible with a dog but having the knowledge from trusted dog trainers is invaluable. Public thanks for the aid!

[lgcseojin]

SOCIAL CUES ✱ @lgcakio

Lather, rinse, repeat.

The stagnant rhythm of the past number of months had already put Seojin in something of a rut — a plateau, one could call it. More training, endlessly, tacked on to an already intensive three months. Having to learn over two years of choreography was no small feat. A dozen songs both of them hadn't originally been part of. ( That's the thing, isn't it? The detail that really makes him itch. )

He has reached a certain point of exhaustion, pushing through day after day, repeating moves and staying well into the hours of night to get things right. ( And it's here that he learns Versus choreographers are quite fond of them sweeping the floor with their shirts. ) He swears he can hear his bones creak when he stands. His muscles throb harder than any intensive leg day could ever put him through. To think he swore he would be used to it by now.

Grimacing, he stands, hiding any pained expressions and stiff movements where Akio could not see them. Losing face in front of one who looks up at him with admiration and for guidance would add a layer of failure to his already mixed feelings. No showing of frustration.

Seojin grabs for his water bottle, flipping it open a bit too hard. A plastic bit—whatever part it's from—flies against the wall and scatters to the floor with a rattle.

"Shit..." he sets the water bottle down roughly. "I just bought this thing, too. Cheap ass...—" He halts his muttering to look over at Akio, sigh slipping from his lips when the intense waves of deja vu wash over him. Here we are again. However, if anything would allow their bond to strengthen, it would be this. He's decided on sticking by him no matter what. No matter how his inner impulses urged him to flee. ( And that moment has long since passed. )

"Let's stop for the day." A quick check of his FitBit blinks up at him: heartbeat elevated, an exorbitant amount of steps, 1 am. "Fuuck..." More despondent swearing. He's tired. So utterly tired that his eyes burn. He combs through his hair, the black roots growing out like tar fingers on his scalp.

"I think we should ditch the dorm and spend the rest of the time at a jjimjilbang... at this rate."

[muttfangs]

story time (jk im just venting)

v. funny to see posts by this dude on my tl who I went on a few dates w/ and then would fall off the face of the earth (rinse repeat) still obsess over me months after ......................................... trying to hide the fact that he's seriously dating someone now lol like. i'm not gonna judge him harshly bc he has a lot of life circumstances going on, and clearly needs to work through a lot of stuff still. but I am gonna judge him a little lmao what happened was: > on off talking / dates sporadically for like idk. a couple years at this point now > reconnected this past summer, he became very interested in me while in IOP (we bonded over our experiences w/ therapy & IOP and it was def nice to be understood and also help him w/ his fears about treatment) >  I was giving him some time & space to adjust to IOP (bc I know that shit is DRAININGGGGGGG rough as fuck AND HE ALSO TOLD ME HE NEEDED SPACE :))))) ) > he’s a terrible communicator (this has been an issue in the past), so he interprets me giving him space as ignoring / abandoning him and never told me how he felt about it > instead I find this out bc he’s posting stuff like “I’m hotter than the boys I cry over” “this is what I get for opening up to someone” “I don’t care” etc on his tl when I check in on him here and there > I’m too old for the “teehee come chase me wait don’t chase me but actually chase me or I’ll be mad at you” high school shit so I decide I’ll keep in touch w/ him as friends, but I’m not pursuing him romantically anymore > keep in touch for the next few weeks (bc I still care about him as a person and IOP is a rough go of it), ask him how IOP is, do the usual “fall out of contact rinse & repeat” cycle again > check his tl about 3 weeks after some radio silence to make sure he’s ok in IOP since he posts about it a lot & I notice someone consistently commenting on all his posts > click their name, scroll down………………………………….. their most recent post is them saying how he “gave me permission to post about this” (YUCK :) ) and that they’re in love with him and they’re officially together as partners now (????? lol, lmao, etc) > wait a minute. > check his tl again………….. relationship status is HIDDEN FROM ME and so is the post this other person made **tagging him in it**. He went out of his way to block me from seeing both of these things lmfao > bitch, you really thought, huh :))))))))))) > send him a DM because I need him to know that I know. It’s shitty to not only me, but to the person he’s dating, to pull weird shiesty tomfoolery like that > “congrats on the relationship dude!” > “thanks bruh” he’s clearly freaked out that I know bc his response is not nearly as cheerful or warm as usual lmao > cue another 1 month and some change of radio silence > check his tl today (because I remembered him saying he’s graduating from IOP around this time of august) > mfer is **still** posting about how he “doesn’t care” and vagueposting about me > (very!) weirded out but still send a congrats DM to him regardless bc I know he’s been through a lot > no response > ok! bye I guess hey???? how come I can’t attract people who are normal about relationship shit lmao

[gittetj]

-CHAPTER 16 OF THE END OF THE WORLD SPOILERS - NOT SURE IF IT'S NECESSARY BUT IT JUST FEELS RIGHT-

I feel like there are others curious about this as well, but what was your thought process behind the kiss scene? Did you think of it when you were just planning out the story or did it come up later? Did the idea surprise/terrify you at first? (i'm beginning to sound like i'm obsessed with it but it's just the last thing i expected of the fic so it delights me endlessly lol) It would actually be cool to know more about the trials and tribulations of how the writing process for the whole chapter went, so if you're willing to share, pleaseee?

(also a random one, but how old is ootsuki?)

Ootsuki is 23. I'll put the rest under the cut~

The kiss was actually something I decided on very early and then debated whether I should get rid of a million times, because yeah, it's out of my comfort zone to write about teenage (non-)romance, and it's so at risk of being taken the wrong way in several different ways. If I hadn't had 3 people with very different perspectives beta-read it and tell me they got what I was going for, I probably would've found some lame way to chicken out of it.

Anyway, the reason I decided to go down that route was that I have a rule that every canon scene with Shou must go in the fic. By no means do you have to make adaptations that way, and there are things later on I'll twist a bit, but I like rules and challenges, so there.

This meant I had to do something with that fucking maid café scene, which, let's be frank, is very gay. It's a weak joke and has no purpose other than to be gay fan service. So what can you do with that? I could either pretend it isn't gay and didn't happen (glaring at ONE here), I could lean into it and make it the start of something romantic, which would derail the themes of this particular story, or I could use it to support my points about all manner of relationships often being weird and difficult and full of mistakes that are sometimes forgivable and sometimes not.

Shou and Ritsu try to figure out if it's a big deal to kiss someone, but there are other more or less explicitly romantic-leaning relationships in this fic, none of which feature any kissing, and meanwhile the person who is the most blatantly physically affectionate with Shou is so in a way that's 100% platonic, and meanwhile, I've given Shou very strange reactions to multiple of the grown-ups in his life which, on a surface-level, you'll often find in fanfic/young adult fiction as cues that something romantic is going on (blushing, stuttering, general awkwardness) although I sincerely hope it's clear that's not where I'm going with that either. I don't know, I just find it very interesting to dig my claws into that whole mess.

But you asked about the writing process, and it wasn't really the kiss that forced me to rewrite chapter 16 like 8 times, but rather that A) I knew Okura had to be in the chapter, but wasn't sure how to use him, and B) I had to construct a scenario where Ritsu would not flip the fuck out and never talk to Shou again after being told about the burning dummy corpses. (Also a lot of other things I don't remember anymore since some of those rewrites happened long ago)

When you have long chapters like this, if you want it to feel cohesive and avoid mood whiplash, you have to pick one high tension point that everything else can build up to. In this one, I wanted the kiss to be that point, which was really fucking difficult with so much other drama happening around it. I don't have enough experience with writing to have a great feel for these things when I have to write them myself, so it was a loop of trying one approach, asking someone, "does it work now?", them saying no and making some suggestions, rinse and repeat.

[delicatebluebirdruins]

This is an amazing fic and I was listening to music that just made it so much better

Until the End by Kelley McRae from the Glory OST (I did watch the show no one ask me when this song played as idk sadly)

And I shared this in my comment and the lyrics that stood out to me but then I thought more about and well I'm going to talk about lyrics. This is a ramble written at 10 in the evening after I spent some time crying after a... thing that happened today. So like yeah enjoy.

[Verse 1] Still one thing puzzles me inside Why can't I live a normal life? No matter how hard I try to change myself I know this much is true

All agents know is ghosts, offence and defence, how to work in a team even when that team dies and they get put in a new one rinse and repeat depending on their luck. They also know that one day their Talent starts to fade and one day they will be shadows of what they once were sidelined or abandoned it makes no difference there is little to no chance their life's will be normal after their years of service. And that's just the agents what about the Night Watch kids?

[Verse 2] How can I bring peace to my heart? I think about it everyday I don't want to pretend to be good anymore No longer

show shout out here Lucy feeling like she's drowning and wishing she were dead from episode 2 after the interaction with Barnes. Lucy came all the way to London to fulfill a shared dream but is still haunted by those she left behind and lost

[Chorus] I've been through a lot my whole life I feel like there's no second chance Whenever I'm frustrated I recall the day

cue the interviews where Lucy got turned away because of every reason under the sun

[Verse 3] They taught me how to live again I'll never fall into despair I just want to live a normal life From now on 'till the end

Lucy meeting Lockwood and George saved her from the Night Watch, and herself she found a family for herself. But she did despair it was that love for them especially Lockwood that lead to her fear of herself

[Chorus] I've been through a lot my whole life I felt like there was no more chance Whenever I'm frustrated I recall the day

[Verse 3] They taught me how to live again I'll never fall into despair I just want to live a normal life From now on 'till the end, oh-oh From now on 'till the end

[analviel]

That Arkham psychiatrist Jazz and guard Danny, but with Corpse AU, Eldritch!Ghost King, and Ghost!Gotham.

So Danny heard Jazz got a job she really wanted, visited the city she moved to, but suddenly felt someone or something call for him. Gotham asked his help to wake her from Slumber and Danny had to stay to help her so he applied as a guard. Cue Danny being the best guard Arkham has ever had.

But it just so happens that when he moved to Gotham Joker was already inside Arkham and when the clown broke out Danny was just getting settled and when Joker performed his latest crime, he's being dragged back to Arkham with a relatively established Danny who now patrols deeper in the building.

So first time Danny sees the clown he stops cold while everyone watches.

Joker is a tresspasser, unwelcomed in Gotham's city-state. Wait, no, Danny realize that Joker must've belonged once, but he was rejected by Gotham along the way. He doesn't really know and can't care about the specifics of what went down there but this thing isn't human and it must be contributing to poor Gotham's state. So Danny beelines to the Joker, and Danny is pretty harmless in his human guise, but then he starts shedding it.

"I am Phantom, invited here by Gotham herself, I belong here for as long as she will allow but you have outstayed your welcome and in my right as the Ghost King, you will be removed." And proceeds to devour it whole.

The rest of the rogues are silent.

Then Danny is back to his usual guise and the Rogues are relatively well behaved and Jazz is loving her job and making so much progress with the other psychiatrists without the Rogues repeatedly breaking out and coming back worse and rinse and repeat.

So, Corpse AU enters along the time the buzz of the new guard reaches the Bats. They interact with Danny as their vigilante persona, sometimes they cross paths as civilians, Gotham adores them. But Joker's disappearance is suspicious and everyone wants to look into it if nothing else because they need peace of mind and closure.

They pick up pieces here and there from the Rogues. So they now inch towards the supernatural genre and about this Ghost King. With their resources and their investigative might, they get the idea of its existence from the scientific community (which is its lack of mention except from a line or two here from two Dr. Fentons interesting that), the records from the Al Ghuls, and the interactions from the magic/supernatural community. I don't know how the realization goes down but Danny profess to his reason for staying, that he's heard the same voice they had to, and is just here to help Gotham. The Bats didn't think it was Gotham's voice or that it (her) even had a voice so that's a thing.

Danny confess to eating Joker. Bruce bristle at the blatant nonchalance at killing and says something about the idea of death may be different for them. Danny answers that he didn't kill the Joker, because killing the Joker wouldn't work because it'll just posses another suitable host, which probably had already happened multiple times, the malicious wraith one of the largest parasites on Gotham's own ectoplasm. Gotham probably voluntarily gave it a part of herself once upon a time and then it started taking and taking and Gotham realized too late. Or something like that.

Anyways, the kids and the Fentons get along swimmingly, Jason particularly pleased by their presence maybe for more than one reasons.

Then someone, probably Tim, I'm putting my bet on my nosy boy, realizes Danny is a ghost and Jazz is his sister and just one of those 'ghosts were alive once and he's definitely the alive before type so what happened' and looks to Amity records and it doesn't take much digging before he finds the case of Phantom. Or Phantom's ghost and his body.

And the ensuing investigation. And Phantom's own hand in the progress of the investigation, or rather his hand in stopping the progress.

It's up to you what the official records say, but one of my fave fics (that one with the relic and written from Maddie's perspective) os that Danny (or his body) was officially killed by Vlad.