#couldnt finish school
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She's planning to go to university :) and study art history :)) with museum curation :)))
#it hurts to see other people living your literal dream#especially when they live in the same house as you#and are you younger sister#i get to be stuck at home forever. unable to get a job. taking care of our grandparents and parents. and never have graduated high school.#im never going to get to do what shes doing#literally never#might as well just settle into the fact im doomed to lead a lifeless life of serving others amd never getting to do what i want#couldnt finish school#cant get a job#will never move out of home#no romantic prospects#will never have enough saved to travel anywhere that requires a passport#why am i even living#why am i here#something in the universe just come and kill me now bc heaven knows ill never be strong enough to do it myself#and HURRY UP ABOUT IT#im so sick of this life
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AGH happy (definitely-not-late) bday to mr jamil viper 💖🐍 and thank u harveston jamil for coming home as well as two of his bday cards 💖💥
#i put WAY too much effort into this and;; i dont even like it 100% 😭#i gave up on the patterns </3#but anyways#thank u jamil for ruining my life ily#also happy holidays everyone (it’s literally still back-to-school season)#actually technically it's already christmas in the philippines#so uhhh#it fits???#thank u harveston sledathon for the perfect timing#[—✦-#-✧ my art#twst#twisted wonderland#twst art#jamil viper#harveston sledathon#-✦—]#also also i havent??? posted art in almost a week???#das crazyyy#i got sick the day after his bday when i was supposed to be finishing up his art >:[#then i just lost all energy for a bit i couldnt do anything 😭#anyways it’s like. 4am i cant sleep#so i decided to just finish up his bday art 😤#who knew drinking thai boba milk tea at 5pm wouldnt be such a good idea#i feel like i’m unnecessarily rambling more than usual lmao sorry 😭
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Very late and unfinished part 2 of yellow tulip
#qsmp#qsmp fanart#qsmp forever#qsmp baghera#yellow tulip because of symbolism to make someone smile#also sunshine#couldnt finish because school life
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♡ jaide, it's me! ♡
finally did that meme that was going around awhile back <3 i had to draw all of his cool costumes at some point and this was the perfect theme to do this hehehehe <3
source of their outfits + original image under the cut c:
credits to @/cafekitsune for dividers
#O9DUFUSUUDHDHSUDD I FEEL SO HEALED . SO REVITALIZED. SO POWERFUL#IM SOOOO STRONGGGGG (is having the shoulder aches since last night. drawing grind goes crazy bro)#WKWKWLLSSKKS WHATEVER RAGAHSHAHA guys lookie i worked very hard on this 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💚💚💚💚💚💚💚#its so PINK!!!!#i went my way to use a different brush and pen for the lineart which is why i struggled A BIT here#i wanted it to be super clean since this was gonna be a big piece#and i wanted to preserve that sticker like/comic book styled presentation more effectively sooo hehe#shojo manga moment real. stevaide shojo real#~ art#♥ memoryshipping#💚 memoryshipping#selfship#selfshipping#pokemon selfship#safeshipping#selfship community#ocxcanon#dude i woke up very early today to go to school but they postponed the rehearsal to 1pm so i stood there like “huh” with wet hair#since i couldnt sleep with wet hair. i went straight to finishjing this hehehehe. well im going to nap a little more now...#ive been itching to finish this im so happy how this turned out fdngkgkdngkdn win for me today <3
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THANKSGIVING BREAK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can DRAW
#or try to#couldnt draw the entire week cuz i had to focus on my schools dance showcase#for like three days#which made me get ahome at around 8-10#and had to finish homework the rest#but i am FREE#soul spouts#i do gotta start my aceable tho smh
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"Are you alright, Miss?"
#crow's scribbles#d4dj#d4dj groovy mix#yukaeso#yuka jennifer sasago#esora shimizu#happy birthday yuka#fuck it im gonna ramble about this drawing#this was originally supposed to be just the spotlight drawing but i felt that it was too empty. i decided to put some panels before it to--#give some oomph to the drawing. hope it can be felt!#i tried something a little different and decided to be a little bit more messy and act like it's a sketchbook drawing? which i think--#helped a lot w finishing this drawing in 3 days. heh#this was supposed to be more... erm. “yaoi-ful” but i couldnt figure out how to draw people on the floor or them tangled up in ms paint yet#so i went w this.... kinda disappointed w myself on that part but oh well! their hair was taken from my ikemen peaky designs from before#also YES! yuka has custom peaky shoes! she got them from esora as well#i still feel this doesnt compare to last year but i think i did well considering the fact i worked on this while i did my school production#i'll stop talking now. bye bye!
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I drew all of my historical AU Sebs!!!!
In order they are(with relevant links to lore info if you are curious!!): Napoleonic Hussar Seb(x), Renaissance Muse Seb(x) and Boy King/Emperor Seb(x)
Let me know which you like best!!!
#oh my fucking god this was truly the endurance race of drawing sessions#i just drew for four hours straight or so......FUN!#and it is now almost 5 am on a school night so pls wish me luck in school haha#basically this spawned from me seeing if i could sketch all 3 of my Sebs easily and then whoops 4 hours later they are finished!#i think now i can draw the hussar uniform with my eyes closed. it was so comforting to draw honestly ;;;;#this is actually the first time ive drawn boy king seb with colors!! so i think it turned out pretty well?#hey guys do you notice what all of the Sebs have in common...? they all have a gold motif...GOLDEN BOY CODED!!!#anyways i think the most developed of these AUs is boy king seb which is funny bcs its the one ive created most recently#but gaahhhhhh ive done so much research and im literally brainrotting over it constantly#now i need to draw fernando in his 3 AUs hahaha but drwing Seb is sooooo much more easy/comfy for me#did you guys also notice i have a fondness for a specific seb hairstyle? malaysia 2010 my truly beloved youve served me so well#i mentioned this already but like i dont get how drawing these kinds of clothing is far more preferable to me than drawing racesuits#well anyways i have so much fun researching into these different eras!! and then very fun to mix it with the drivers#im very surprised i was able to draw this. im not usually able to draw good chibi anatomy#but like seriously i think i was posessed by my thoughts of boy king seb and i just couldnt stop drawing#in didnt really have any mental roadblocks which is surprising#but then again these drawings are me mixing my two major interests atm so ofc it'll come to me easily and make me passionate!!#anyways time to go sleep pwease dont let this flop my hands literally are overheated from drawing LMFAO#catie.art.#sebastian vettel#f1#formula 1#f1 fanart#formula 1 art#formula 1 fanart#f1 art#boy king au#renaissance muse au#hussar au
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i told people over and over again that i wanted to go by a different name and they wouldnt listen, i got in trouble when i told people a name that wasnt my assigned name. i tried telling people i didnt have a name and i got in trouble. they sent me to the fucking principles office.
why wouldnt they just change my fucking name? convincing someone theyve been raped is ok but changing their name isnt?
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good ol fashioned razzmatazz
SO I wrote more... :) ive wanted to do a series of scenes from Gideon's life for a while now- moments in time we didn't see in the show. mostly past, maybe some present or future, depending. wanted to explore his life a little more, and the headcanons ive got surrounding it. drabbles is the best way to solve this because i cant write one long cohesive plot very well haha
ive got a handful of ideas in mind but this is the first one that i finished to any degree. just a little scene from his childhood. gideon makes his first sale, and learns something about himself.
‘What are you up to, sweetie?’
‘Shh- it’s a secret.’
Gideon hushed his mother as he ran over to the back door and shoved his face up against it, peering out through the frosted glass window into the car lot. His mother, Florence, turned her attention away from the oven for a moment to squint at him. He was wearing his favorite dress shirt, the dark blue one covered in golden stars- shorts and sandals for the weather, and his long hair was pulled back into a white braid. The sun caught on his hair through the window, and she could have sworn she saw it sparkle. What a strange little boy they had, she thought.
---
She remembers how tiny he was when she first held him, and how odd his shock of white hair had been. Odder still when she first saw the icy blue eyes he had- not like hers or Bud’s, not at all. Neither of them had even heard of what the doctors diagnosed him with before then. Some sort of ‘congenital condition’, for whatever that meant. All that fancy medical talk was a bit out of her area of expertise. All that mattered to her was that their little boy was alive- and now, at least on his way to better health.
Their little Gideon had been much more adventurous these days. Ever since the doctors had given him the OK during his last hospital visit, he’d seemingly been itching to get outside. He hummed loudly, like he was deep in thought.
Florence smiled. She reached over to the fridge.
‘Well, if you aren’t too busy with your secrets, could you do me a favor?’
‘Hm?’ He whipped his head over to look at his mother, who was holding a little tupperware container.
‘How about you go across the lot and take this to your dad for me?’
The wheels turned for a moment, and Gideon perked up instantly.
‘Y’mean it? On my own?’
‘Of course, hon. As long as you’re careful-’
He nodded, a smile creasing his face. Oh- she couldn’t help it, every time he smiled, she smiled too. Surely every mother thinks their child is the cutest kid on the planet, but well… she KNEW hers was. And she knew that they’d been very protective of him these past few months, what with the hospital scare and all. As much as she fretted about his health- she made a mental note to deep clean his room again this weekend- she couldn’t squash that spirit behind his eyes. It couldn’t hurt to let him out on his own for a little bit.
He took the container from her hands and tucked it under one of his arms, nodding solemnly.
‘Ah’ll handle it, ma’am!’ He stood up straight and gave a little salute, his face faux-stern, and she couldn’t help but laugh. He’d been watching too much TV lately, bless him.
She waved him off as he skittered out of the door, turning her attention back to the oven.
---
Gideon shielded his eyes from the afternoon sun. The worst of his sensitivity to it may have gone away with the treatments, but it still got awful bright out in summer. But he’d power through it. After all, he had a mission.
He took off at a run down the winding garden path, rushing through the gate onto the concrete car lot. The weather was hot, but there was that fresh summer breeze blowing in his face that made him glad to be out of his room. He liked it in there plenty- he had books and instruments and more toys than he knew what to do with- but being cooped up in bed for so long had him yearning for the outdoors. He squinted, spying the towering figure of his father through the light glinting off the windows of his work building.
Giggling, he sprinted across the lot as fast as his legs could carry him into the shop.
‘Dad!’ He burst through the door, startling his father. Bud Gleeful whipped around from where he was sat across a little plastic table with a skinny spectacled gentleman, poring over a contract. He wore a battered looking old suit but held himself with an oddly aristocratic air. He seemed out of place on a used car lot.
‘Woah there, sunshine-’ Bud started, his sentence cut off with an oof- as Gideon jumped onto his lap. ‘Heavens, boy! What’s gotten into you?’
Gideon looked up at him- and then across the table to his latest customer. He had put the contract down and was looking down at the two of them, a smile creasing his cheeks. Bud raised a hand, a little embarrassed. ‘Oh my, I’m mighty sorry for the interruption, sir-’
‘Oh, no. It’s quite alright.’ He laughed- he had that fancy city-folk accent, Gideon noticed. He tilted his head to the side to get a better look at him. ‘Now who is this fine little fellow?’
‘Oh, well this is-’
‘Gideon!’ He piped up, folding his hands across his lap with a smile. ‘Gideon Charles Gleeful!’
‘Haha- yep. That’s my lil’ Gideon.’ Bud finished for him, resting one big hand on his son's shoulder. ‘This is my son. Little fella ain’t been too well recently, but he’s lookin’ fit as a fiddle now. Acting it, too! Well now, why’d you rush over here in such a hurry, boy? Does your mother know you’re-’
‘Oh, yeah! I brought ya’ this from mom.’ He held out the container to Bud, who picked it up- turned it over, then hummed in understanding.
‘Hah, oh yeah. I s’pose I did almost forget about lunch, all caught up in negotiatin’.’ He mused. ‘Thank you kindly, sweetheart.’ He leant down to kiss his forehead, which Gideon responded to by playfully swatting him away.
The moment was interrupted then by the man across the table clearing his throat. Gideon and Bud both turned their attention back to him.
‘Mr. Gleeful, I have to be honest- I wasn’t sure if this was the right car for me, a few minutes ago. Forgive me for my bluntness, but I was worried this place might not be… on the up-and-up, if you catch my drift.’ Gideon felt his fathers hand slip off his shoulder, a subtle change in his demeanor.
‘But… well, seeing you here- you seem like a real family man, Mr. Gleeful. Trustworthy. I’m sorry for doubting you.’ He chuckled. ‘I suppose I thought this contract might be too good to be true for a moment there.’
‘Nah, dad’s the best at this stuff!’ Gideon piped up- he felt Bud tense up for a second, about to hush him, but he carried on. ‘I’m gonna learn to sell cars just as good as his, someday! So you can tell yer kids to come buy from me!’
Bud held his breath a moment, but then the customer burst out laughing.
‘Oh- goodness, how sweet. You know what, Gideon? I’ll have to remember that.’
‘That’ll be Mr. Gleeful to you!’
Bud picked him up then, lifting himself out of his chair and carrying his son high up to perch on his shoulder. ‘Okay, that’s enough teasing, boy-’
‘Haha! No, no, he’s got it right.’ The skinny man stood too, pushing his glasses up his nose. ‘You know what? You’ve got yourself a sale, Mr. Gleeful.’
He held his hand out- up, above Bud’s, to Gideon. He grasped it firmly, grinning ear to ear and shook his hand. The gentleman nodded his head, then reached into his pocket and pulled out a crisp 20 dollar bill.
‘Forgive me for being forward- but may I give the young man a commission?’
Bud startled, glancing at it- then back to Gideon- then back to the money. ‘Oh, my- that’s awful kind of you sir, it certainly is! Of course you can.’
Gideon’s eyes lit up. He eagerly took the twenty, held it up to the light- then slipped it into his pocket. He squirmed- a sign for Bud to pick him up and let him down on the floor again- and stood up straight with his arms folded.
‘Thanks, sir!’ He chirped, and Bud leant down to pat the top of his head.
‘Now Gideon, do you think you could let the grown-ups handle the borin’ part of all this paperwork?’ He crouched to smile at his son.
‘Sure thing.’
‘Alright, sweetpea. Don’t spend your money all in one place, y’hear?’
‘Okay, dad!’
His mission complete, Gideon padded over to the door- leant over his shoulder to wave at the man his father was now pushing a pen into the hand of- and left the room.
Stopping on the sun-soaked car lot, he reached into his pocket and felt the dollar again. Thought about the look on that man's face when he gave him the money, for nothing but a few words and a smile. His dad had a pretty easy job, he figured. But he didn’t really understand the whole sales thing- not yet, at least.
---
Gideon would spend the rest of the day playing in the garden- until he got too hot and tired, and retreated back to his shaded room for a nap. He wouldn’t think too much about what happened that day.
But that night, his father would take them out to the diner and boast loudly about how his son- barely in his fifth year!- had made his first ever sale. He’d let him order dessert- seconds, too. And he’d ask Gideon to stop by the lot more often, especially if he wants to learn to be a salesman someday. He was one talented boy, his parents told him. Showered him with that notion, really. He was destined to be a big shot one day with a personality as glowing as his.
'You have a face folks would never say no to!' His father told him. He didn't mean much when he said it- more of a joke than anything. But something about it settled with Gideon, still learning about the world. Nobody would say no to him, huh...?
He figured that sounded pretty nice.
#gravity falls#gideon gleeful#fanfiction#i was going to structure these drabbles as one of those 5+1 things but uh. i couldnt come up w a cohesive throughline#and also idk if ill write all the ones I have planned. so its better for me to just post em whenever I finish one haha#PLEASE ENJOY... this isnt much rly just. a little scene. gideon is a precocious kid people think hes cute#hes sheltered a bit and spoiled. but generally a Real Sweetheart at this age. hes only beginning to learn about the concept of deception#things will undoubtedly Get Worse since this is before he goes to school in my timeline haha#honestly most of this was me wanting to write a lil about gideons parents#i dont think either of them Intended anything bad in their raising of their son. they just wanted their little angel to be happy#but they do end up enabling some things they reeeeeally shouldnt as time goes on#anyway hes gonna spend that twenty on soooo much candy
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the interest WILL be coming back, actually
#rambling rambling...#ace attorney#I CAN FINALLY PLAY ALL THE GAMES (the chronicles have been sitting there bcs i couldnt finish dual destinies)#shoutout to a mutual in here that made all the ace attorney art it revived my 2022 self#(i'll probably be unable to play them cus of school but whatev)
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Happy late Valentines day!!!! :D (if you are in the same timezone as me this would be late)
Also sorry for not posting any art recently I have been drawing a lot of doodles but every new year I go through a crisis, basically I want the first art posted for the new year to be special to me and luckily Maranzalor (this is what I'm calling the ship for now hehe :]) is very special to me so yippee!!!!
#marx kirby#marx kirby fanart#magolor#taranza#my art#The day before Valentines day I forgot it was going to be Valentines day tommorow and I couldnt finish the drawing because I had school#and because my mom dragged me to the gym with her for like an hour and I had to go to sleep#im going to post a version with shading later because I have schoolwork to do again sorry for not posting in a while#Maranzalor#Im still coming up with a ship name for them hehe :]#marxanza#marxolor
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buncha leon doodlez i did at school:)
#get so god damn bored i hate this school LOL but leon is my guy n he makez me happy he helps me thru it👍 somewhat#spooky month#leon manson#SORRY 4 not postin a lot shits hard rn lmaoo got loads of ideas tho so mayb if stuff gets easier ill get 2 it:)#scrawlz#ALSO SORRY 4 NEVER POSTING MY TEEN HAUNTED HOUSE GANG DESIGNS💔💔 ik i said id do it a While ago#but i just couldnt finish em:(( mayb ill post em as silly individual doodlez someday💔
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oops! all wips
#dndads#1st img is morgan . tried to solidify the type of person that would marry glenn & jodie and its like#manic pixie dream girl meets wife under bedsheets. fun loving carefree extremely irresponsible i imagine shes as much a bad mom as glenn is#a bad dad#close family dinner for each day of the week#i imagine its very depressing cool for kids sad for adult/college life meals#i had like a pmv/animatic of tmbg erase to nicks everything but ill never finish it sadge!#comic in the middle i was gonna do like a immediately after the final where willys defeated and schools out for summer norm and scary run#into eachother while theyre walking home#and scary would ask whats wrong and normal would be like#well knowing that the entire world ended because of me has been sort of weighing#on me yeah“ and then scary would go ”normal...do you wish that *was* the reason?“ which would lead normal getting dumbstuck cuz she hits#the nail on the hammer. and then hes incredibly defensive and hes like uh b buh NO !!! MAYBE !!! and scary would share her experience#but itd make normal more resentful cuz hed be like well it all worked out for you in the end with you and your dad and you mom who all love#you. and then scary would get irked and start to call him out but then now that the bottles been uncorked his resentment would start#spilling out.#“you burned my house down! i thought it was *my* family that had the connection with the doodler ! but why- when- ”#and normal would be so frustrated and he couldnt get his words out and hed refuse to look at scary while she looks at him w/ the hardest#look of conflicted sympathy and pain#and all she could say would be stop comparing yourself to me and shed mean that in the most compassionate way possible and norm would just#be like i know#and then the bus would come and scary would have to go but shed look back and then be like “am i still coming over saturday to play#and him busy crying would just give a thumbs up#god now that i write this out maybe i will draw it i have a little bit of time left why not#to me i think scarys someone normal would have the easiest time being mean to#one because of his latent misogyny and this like unconscious superciliousness he holds towards her yet shes the one receiving the#validation he sorely craves and knowing if theres anyone he could talk to and whos understand what hes going through its her so though he#isnt able to be emotionally vulnerable or engage in a deeper level but he does feel comfortable enough to lash out at her#last pic is if nick woke up post doodlerized and found himself on cassandras couch (where the teens placed him) and shes there to greet him
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inktober day 17
prompt - sitting pose
#COULDNT FINISH BC SCHOOL#twisted wonderland#twst#hcs#twst hcs#hc design#leona kingscholar#twst leona#im so burnt out#dieing#inktober#day 17
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fuck I need to continue that one wip but I don't feel like writing rn >_>
#its devotions.. zam comforting mapicc when hes getting Weird and Anxious about zam abandoning him.#started it for lstober possession day but couldnt finish bc school >_>#its just. very relevant rn. and kinda applies to how theyre acting#godddddd they hurt me#devotion posting#rambles
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It's getting more and more certain that I'm gonna get straight As this semester. For the very first time in my college career. My persuasion class is entirely graded, & I got a 95.88% in it. My data governance class still has the final paper to grade, but we got a 97.33% on the presentation, so the paper probably won't be much lower than that, & my current running grade in that class is a 96.53%, so. We'd have to do Pretty Badly to get that below a 90%, so it's almost a guaranteed A. Then there's my gender communication class, which doesn't have a listing on the homework website (bc my professor in that class is real old-school) BUT I got full points on my final essay exam too, which means the Only thing in that class I got points taken off for was my presentation, which Even Then I still got a pretty good grade. So that one's almost certain to be an A as well.
Which leaves UX design class, which is still missing a grade for the project we turned in back at the start of November 😭😭😭😭😭 but they say they're grading them this week so. Sure, I guess. (Still don't know why they graded the more recent project before that one but Oh Well). Anyways, we've been getting really good grades on all our projects, bc it's a level 100 course and their grading criteria is really easy 😂😂😂. So really good grades on all the projects. Not as good grades on the class participation stuff bc I kept forgetting to do my reflections and the readings, but that's not very many points overall. So unless we do badly on the project that has yet to be graded (unlikely), I'm Proooobably going to get an A in this class too. At worst, a B. But I'm hoping for an A.
It'd just be really cool to have straight As for the first time in college. And then maybe, just maybe, I'll do it all over again next semester too >:]
#speculation nation#usually i have at least one class i struggle with more#but i Also have spent every semester before this also working a job.#which that's the key difference i think. it's Impossible for me to keep a job without making sacrifices.#and yknow my dad and my old advisor would tell me that school's more important#but when you gotta work to eat and pay ur way thru school. u kinda Have to prioritize work?#when it comes to staying in ur boss's favor and keeping regular attendance etc etc etc#there were a number of times i ended up so tired from work id get home and look at an assignment and go 'do i Really need to do this?'#check the syllabus to see how much it's worth. and if i think i can get away with it then i skip it.#but not this semester. i finished every stupid fucking assignment bc there Were no work conflicts like that.#(minus the One quiz i forgot which got dropped anyways. and then the readings and reflections i mentioned above lol)#and as it turns out. when u do Every damn assignment. well that directly translates to better grades.#and see even without working a job. full time school is still fucking punishing.#i kept at it but there were a number of times i felt myself cracking.#held it together thru determination alone. one foot in front of the other. i kept going. i finished. and i did a damn good job of it.#couldnt live that way for too long though. it's no wonder i kept having breakdowns in previous semesters#with me trying to do school while also working. full time school just does Not work for me with that.#and even part time school was more than i could handle well.#but i Can be a good student when i can actually Focus on it. my grades here are evidence enough.#so im feeling pride. and im feeling certainty.#i have 3 classes left to complete before i graduate. and im gonna.#i WILL do well on those classes too. and i WILL graduate in may. im speaking it into existence. i WILL do it.
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