#coincidentally is also something else about me

[bisnes-socks]

i have a lot to say about this one so pack a snack and let's make sex moneyyy

i think this is one of the most openly culture and media (and social media) critical songs he has. i think it's a super daring song that probably makes the likes of certain helsingin sanomat music critics a little bit uncomfortable, because he is spitting facts - and because he has a relationship with sex for show that people for some reason are still quite weird about.

to start a little further back: we all know sex sells. we all know the music industry uses sex to sell their products. but for some reason, in the year of our lord 2024, a musical artist verbally recognising that they are using their sexuality and sexual themes to build their brand is somehow scandalous. it's like.. it's okay to use sex to sell your art, if it's like "accidental" MTV sexuality or like agreeing to looking objectifiable. the media will call you hot and sexy and wow. but if you own your sexuality, make it obvious that yes this is sexual, i'm being very deliberately sexual and i am trying to be sexual..? oh no that won't do! scandal! we've seen it with so many artists, especially female artists. like WAP is a great example! how scandalous that suddenly these women had agency in their own sexuality! but no-one said a word when their sexuality served the usual male gaze agenda. it's like people are so much more comfortable being peeping toms who sexualise and objectify artists when they're not looking, but as soon as the artist does it as part of their whole thing? well now it's inappropriate actually.

he talked about this in a helsingin sanomat interview, saying how he does actually think things revolve too much around sex in the music industry, even though he uses sex and sexual themes himself to sell things as well, and that he sees the irony in saying that. but the difference, in my opinion, is that the way he, or someone like erika vikman for example, is so open and upfront about the sexual themes, that it becomes carnevalistic, it becomes camp. it's not insidiously using sexual and heteronormative objectifying imagery to get people horny. what käärijä does is playful and fun sexuality, and for whatever reason that is so unusual it needs to be talked about separately as something a bit wild and scandalous, and he needs to be asked to explain his actions.

and that's what this song is. he's very clearly saying none of this is accidental. the visuals of his brand, the social media content, the onlyfans thing, none of it is coincidental, accidental or anything other than his perfectly deliberate way of selling sex. and he has talked about these themes before, he has talked about like the rammstein live stuff that inspired him (some of it is pretty hardcore stuff) so to his fans it's nothing surprising that sexual themes are present in the brand and interest him. but he has also talked about how, even if this song is a bit tongue in cheek, he's also serious. and he is right. and for some reason calling people out about the fact that sex makes them buy things, even when it's true, is still.. scandalous somehow.

and he's basically calling people easy lmao. like, i needed to figure out a lil boost to my career and well, i know what will make you throw money at me. and i won't be shy about it either.

i'm getting sidetracked. the song.

and then that is enough to warrant lyrics such as "koko perheen käärijästä koko perheen krapula" meaning "käärijä for the whole family turning into a hangover for the whole family".

but it was all already there! let's not for a second pretend CCC was some sort of family show and a family song. it's not. but people were okay with that, because they could happily confuse the camp and carnevalistic sexuality of käärijä with the campness and carnevalistic nature of eurovision, and because it wasn't more than the suggestive sexual nature of everything else around them. and it was all just fun, when kids came up with their own lyrics to the song because they couldn't understand the references to drinking. so then people took their kids to see him at shows and became scandalised by the adult nature of it all. it's like.. people were fine letting their kids see the everyday media sexuality that we see in every eurovision, fine letting their kids get used to that, and then just sort of didn't think käärijä would be anything different. but he's only different in that in his show and brand, sex and sexuality aren't denied while still blatantly obviously there.

but again, a lot of this is to do with media, and what media normalises and what it doesn't. what it deems newsworthy and what it doesn't.

if in ready to go he's telling haters that i know you want to see me try and fail, maybe even be too embarrassed to try, but baby i'm ready to go, then in sex = money he's saying i know you want to see me naked and i know you want sex from all of this, so here you go, i'll sell you some sex. and then he stands there holding eye contact like what are you going to do with it. what a cunty king.

and there are so many fun and funny little details in this song.

right in the first verse we have "kieli taittuu sköödi föödi." good old sköödi föödi. i tried to find the earliest example of sköödi föödi, but i'm starting to think it might predate the internet, or at least social media. not to bring up köpi kallio again, but they use sköödi föödi a lot in viki ja köpi show, and köpi just happened to tweet about it in 2020, saying he believes sköödi föödi has been around for at least 20 years (someone tried to credit viki and köpi for it). so, what does sköödi föödi mean, you ask. it does not mean anything at all. sköödi föödi is just a sound, a noise you make, when you need it, usually in place of something in a foreign language but not exclusively. in this instance, sköödi föödi is him demonstrating his excellent english skills. sköödi föödi (pronounced almost like a sterotypical tv american would say skirdy-firdy) means nothing and it means everything, whatever you need it to mean.

it is also noteworthy to point out that "kieli taittuu" can be a reference to two different things here. the finnish word kieli means both tongue and language. so he could also be saying that he has a very bendy and flexible tongue, like literally. which, of course, all of europe has already seen. taittua literally means to fold or bend, but it's a common phrase to say, that if you can do something, you bend it (or more like it bends as a result). so literally the line translates to "language/tongue bends sköödi föödi".

the first verse ends in "sekö jos mikä on varma nakki" meaning "that, if anything, is a sure thing". nakki literally means a sausage, a hot dog sausage, weiner sausage, you name it: a small sausage. so translating literally: "that if anything is a sure sausage". it's a common phrase in spoken finnish, nothing unusual about that, but i love that he used it, because it makes the next line hilarious on a first listen, when the chant comes in. so when they start chanting NAK- NAK- i really thought they were gonna shout NAKKI. but no, it is nakuna, naked.

okay still with me? good. let's look at the "tein onlyfans bägin, koko suomen daddy" section next.

i remember when the song came out, people did explain who danny is, but in case anyone missed it, danny is a singer from finland, and he was a MASSIVE star back in the day, especially in the 70's. so to say he is bigger than danny is indeed quite the flex, because danny was like.. the finnish equivalent of elvis, basically. but danny is not just a flex, he turns danny into a clever thematical scheme here (more on thematical schemes in the bananas post, if you're interested). he says "kadulla on kuumaa, ne pyytää mua hätiin" and this is a reference to one of danny's most popular and famous songs, kesäkatu. smart, smart, smart! and then of course "kadulla on puumaa, mut mulla on jo täti" meaning there are cougars on the street, but i already have an aunt. which, that to me reads like both a cunty quip and a himbo line all at once. like shutting down some man wanting to be your daddy by telling him "but i already have a father". i nearly choked laughing the first time i heard the line.

also can i just say, calling himself the daddy of finland? like, thinking about the whole context i talked about at first, how people are comfortable with sexual stuff and sexualising, but not comfortable recognising it or being real about it or celebrating it? yeah knowing all that, he just called himself EVERYONE'S daddy in a song called sex = money, and he's not even wrong 😭

in conclusion: i love this song. and i love the attitude in it. it's like he is looking everyone, from every uncomfortable insecure hetero man, every scandalised parent to every tabloid journalist, straight in the eye and saying "yes, i'm selling sex. why? well i couldn't think of anything else, but then again, why should i? isn't this what you want? this is what you want. i know what you want. i'm your daddy."

like if he truly wanted to, he really could have this country on their knees for him, don't tell me last independence day didn't prove it. as much as he gets crap as well, at the end of the day, he has people under a spell by simply being, well, bigger than danny. and he-man.

now. the placement of the song on the album, right after autiomaa.

i personally don't think that the album builds one cohesive narrative from beginning to end. but i think this can be read two ways: a sad way and an empowering way. the sad way to read it is that he means it when he says he couldn't come up with anything else and his creativity is fried, but sex sells so he does that, and it's a bit mindless. but given the context of what he has had to say about this song, i'm more inclined to read this the empowering way: he has worked on himself and found a way to see things more clearly, and he has found it in himself to even be confrontational about things. the whiplash of the song order i think is more to highlight the fact that autiomaa is a rare glimpse into something different, and now here we go again. to me, sex = money makes autiomaa even more powerful, but autiomaa doesn't change the interpretation of sex = money all that much for me.

you really can't be upset about the song without proving his point. and you can't love the song without proving his point. facts have been spat and points have been proven. absolute king behaviour.

and if you read through this whole thing, i owe you money. cash money, not sex money. well, we'll talk about it.

++

bonus: i absolutely love that he knows how to say "make some noise" on this track, but continues to say "give me some voice" or some sort of a hybrid word between voice and noise, something like.. woise, at his international shows. the king of in through one ear, out through the other. he, she, noise, voice, he doesn't know the differences and does not care.

bonus bonus for the sad bojere bitches:

second verse: "täl alal ei sua kukaa huomaa" meaning "nobody will notice you in this field (of work)". maybe my brain is rotted but this moment reminds me so much of the famous liverpool bojere lunch date video where bojan tries to parrot jere, who is saying "tääl ollaa nyt, tota" and bojan goes "talalaiteta" and then they both proceed to giggle about it like it's the funniest thing anyone has ever said. "täl alal" goes out to you, bojan titanic.

[hkayakh]

15

If you stayed the age of your birth DAY forever, how old you would be?

[egginfroggin]

Snippet of a fic currently languishing in my drafts. I'll be posting it on Thursday next week, for day 4 of @bananacreamphi's Dojoshipping Week.

---------

He was smiling, she noticed in the light of the lanterns on the street corner and the soft glow of his eyes. It would be a slight thing on anyone else, mouth barely even curving, but it was equivalent to a blinding grin coming from him, and she wondered what had him so excited.

Especially considering the hour.

“I have something to show you,” he said. Ah, now his hands were fidgeting. Pent-up energy. She blinked a bit more awake.

“Now?” she asked, tilting her head. “Where?”

“Preferably, though it might happen again soon,” was the reply, oddly cryptic. “In the Fieldlands.”

Bafflement settled on her expression, and he edged a scant inch back, almost wilting. “Though it – it can wait, certainly.”

She shook her head, trying to force some lucidity back into her skull, and stepped away to slide on some sandals. “No, no, I’m curious. How far?

The spark was back again, and she found herself smiling at how bright he was.

“Not far,” he said, almost subconsciously reaching to take her hand as she stepped out and shut the door. “Just past the base camp.”

She blinked at their joined hands, almost stumbling as he pulled her along, and she held back a bemused laugh at the forwardness of the act.

“Somewhere further north would be better,” he said, hand still wrapped around hers, fingers still warm around hers. “The Icelands would be perfect, or the Temple of Sinnoh, but those are much too far now. Though it would be spectacular there," he mused, almost as an aside. "But the Fieldlands will work.”

Zisu did laugh, then, and she waved off the guard at the gate when he went to stop them.

“And what is this thing?” she said. “You’re ecstatic, Warden.”

He looked back at her, slowing slightly, perhaps noticing just how fast he’d been pulling her along, and ducked his head sheepishly.

“It’s –” he cut off, glancing up, and she went to follow his gaze only to be stopped when he made a distinctly protesting tut. “It's a surprise.”

[lindenmori]

maybe its linked to how the mbti thing turned out to be made up by eugenicists, and maybe also the monsther getting into some such pseudo psychological cultlike bullshit and trying to drag me down too, but i am automatically suspicious whenever theres some personality test that puts people into some kind of personality type role boxes. i feel like it immediately stunts further inspection.

and maybe if you, for example, feel the need to fix everyone and shoulder everyones problems, its not because you are some kind of predestined supportive angelic healer type whos meant for helping others, its more likely because you dont have firm boundaries and dont know how to say no, or maybe you had everything blamed on you and think everything is your responsibility, or something else. or if you often push all of your needs aside to plow through to your goal even to your own detriment its not because youre some destined trailblazer hero type. it might just be because you had someones ambitions dumped on you, and your needs were often disregarded and/or you were not treated as worthy unless you did these grand accomplishments, so you learned to disregard your own needs. or something else.

and if i, personally, for example, always daydreamed of different or better worlds, its not because i am some destined inspired visionary type. its because this world has been cruel to me so i have constantly yearned for better.

it might just be very human nature to try to end our confusion (and subsequent thinking, research and discovery) by putting the subject we are looking at in some convenient box, but this also makes us miss out on so much nuance and truth. life is unfortunately not an rpg and no one picked you a class.

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

All I can do until we see what happens with this election is hope, distract myself, and try to get others to vote, because if I think too hard about it my anxiety and depression gets worse and the voice in the back of my head that tells me to hurt myself and go hide in the woods or something gets louder

[triglycercule]

i come up with ideas based on the most random things because wdym i just rambled on about fucking fingers and decided,,,, heh,,,,, yeah. this is a good idea. well i mean i do think it IS a good idea but also like in hindsight and out of context i do think its totally fucking stupid. angel92 ahh post 💀💀💀

anyways i was thinking about mtt and fingers and which ones they would lose as a result of being with eachother but then that also means that i'd have to give specific meanings to the fingers (ughhhh,,,,,) ok lets see. pointer finger would represent precision and clear vision because you literally use it to specifically gesture to things. middle finger is like ughh vulgarity and hatred because its the middle finger. the ring finger (heh! i already spoke about this one because of the myth that its connected to the heart and also holds wedding rings) represents love and the pinkie represent promise (PINKIE PROMISE!) and the thumb represents basic functioning and interpretations (because the thumb helps us literally hold things and also thumbs up and down shows your view on things)

i think if i just tack this idea onto the other post about ring fingers then it would be kinda unrealted + plus too long SO ITS GOING HERE. all the mtt are missing ring fingers because i said so. dust is missing an index finger because if the trio break up he's the only one that wouldnt have anywhere/one to go. also he'd struggle to smoke and i think that horror would always complain about him smoking so it'd be like horror's still kinda there warding him off from smoking even though he's not there anymore. horror would lose his middle finger because he'd probably be the most agressive against kist in mttpoly and now without them there he's kinda chilled out. but also the agression and spark isnt there and now he's stuck in plain old boring regular horrortale again which isnt all that fun,,,, even if dust an killer sucked fighting was a way to pass time. but horror would never admit that. and i think killer could lose a thumb (ill be fr im just running out of fingers to use here. next thing yk i'll start talking about TOES) and then he'd struggle to hold knives normally now. he literally can't hurt others the way he hurt horror and dust (but also that could also mean that killer just has to come up with more creative ways to main. or also his reduced actions could result in him causing less trouble and therefore having less threats. depends on if killer wants to be a bit more knife happy or just chil,,,,,, you KNOW i gotta go with the knife happy idea mtt NEVER get a break and if they do i immediately forget about it)

dude imagine them with all these missing fingers 💀💀💀 that shit would lookd SO weird

[novelbear]

"maybe you'll feel it, too" -best friends to lovers prompts

a prompt list by @novelbear ᵔᴥᵔ

lingering hugs and stares

"you know i'm always going to be there for you, right? always."

compliments that are borderline (sometimes just blatant) flirting but they cover it up as just being a really supportive friend

^ "you sure this looks fine?" "trust me, you look fine as hell..."

being overly protective of the other (especially when it comes to relationships)

showing displays of affection that might seem questionable to others around them (ex. kissing each other on the cheek/ hands)

hand placement when hugging or guiding them also being a little more on the questionable side

"i'm always thinking about you."

being unable to tear their eyes off of them, especially when watching them excel at something they're best at

sharing clothes

"why are you looking at me like that?"

unconsciously including them in conversation when they're not even around

"there's no one else that makes me laugh the way you do."

noticing them blushing coincidentally after making a comment. but they can't be blushing because of what they said. they wouldn't. would they? no, of course not...right?

holding hands and neither of them knowing when (or wanting to) let go

when that realization hits that they really wouldn't rather spend their time with anyone else the way they do with their "best friend"

rambling on and on and on and wait are they looking at my eyes or my lips?

"if we were dating i'd take you to all the best places.." "what's stopping you?" "excuse me."

"can i kiss you?" "you have no idea how long i've waited to hear you ask that."

the relief that washes over both of them when the feelings are finally out there

"why didn't you tell me?" "the same reason you didn't tell me. i didn't want to lose you."

[kaciebello]

Delivery fees

Slytherin boys x Hufflepuff! reader (use of she/her, no use of y/n) Masterlist Delivery Express ✿ Summary: The reader sees an opportunity to run an untapped market in Hogwarts. Business opportunities arise and brands need to be made. warnings: mention cigarettes, nothing else really Authors note: English is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes beforehand. I want to spread this into a one-shot series. Proofread by me and me only :( • Previously: Don’t shoot the messenger • Next part: Left on delivered Word count: 1262

Notes to deliver - 14

The group of boys was relaxing in the courtyard, some sitting on the uncomfortable stone benches, one individual was leaning against a tree that provided them shade and two more sat on the floor forming a semi-circle of their friend group. Nobody dares to approach the ‘ dangerous’ group of individuals for their own sake. Well, nobody but a certain Hufflepuff girl with a bright yellow bow in her hair.

Who, coincidentally, was making her way over to them. As fast as she appeared she sat down and made herself comfortable between her friend's legs who was sitting on a bench. A string of greetings could be heard from the group but the girl paid them no mind. She had business to take care of.

“ Hello, Sunshine. All good?” Asked Lorenzo leaning over the girl nested between his legs hoping to catch a glimpse of her face. She shook her head and dug out her trust notebook from her bag. “ I can't come up with a name.” she just says and ignores the stares the group gives her. Lorenzo gives up and just plays with the bow in her hair. 

“ Name for what?” Asks The boy leaning on the tree, Theodor. Now too, sitting down at the base of it. She looks up from her notebook with a sigh.

“Isn't it obvious? My delivery business. I can’t go nameless for long.”  Nods and hums of agreement sound from the boys yet no suggestion in sight so she continues.

“ I was going to name it Badger Express, but my muggle friends informed me that something called Panda Express exists and that they deliver Chinese food. I simply can not rival that.” She whines and crosses something out of her notebook.

“ You talk to muggles?” Asked Draco, seemingly offended by even being in the existence of the word. To his dismay no answer just a pencil is thrown his way.

“Royal Mail is also taken, so that's that one crossed out.”  A huff makes them all turn their heads to Blaise, making his eyes widen with all the attention.

“ Hogwarts express?” He suggests with a sheepish shoulder shrug.

“ You mean like the train that takes us here and back every year?” argues Mattheo on behalf of the girl.

“ What else was I supposed to say?” Snaps back Blaise.

“ A better idea” whispers Draco and some heads turn to him immediately. A laugh can be heard leaving Theodor as a playful argument breaks out between the boys. 

The girl just sighed and turned her head up to look at Lorenzo. “ Your friends lack creativity love, we shall find you new ones.” Lorenzo just nods wordlessly after observing them himself.

“ I think badger delivery could work nicely.” He suggests, the girl just nods, as this is as good as it’s gonna get from any of them.

“ The name does not matter right now. I have gotten complaints about the charge.” She announces effectively stopping the fight as all the heads turn to her. Confusion on their faces and pure despair of hers.

“ How much do you charge?” Asks Mattheo opening his cigarette packet and passing it over to Theodor. 

“ 5 galleons.”

“Pocket change.” Ignoring his remark and declining the cigarette Theo was offering to her.

“ I think I am going to charge depending on what they want. Because if I have to deliver one more love note dosed in amortentia my head will burst” She wonders aloud, not looking for an answer from them. Her hand searches for a pencil that now rests behind Malfoy's ear and immediately gives up when she notices its place.

” What does it smell like to you?” Asks her Theodor as if they were girls at a sleepover doing facemasks and sharing who their crushes are.

“Wouldn't you like to know.” She answers her eyes narrowing at the boy.

“ I bet I can guess who it smells like.” Says Mattheo with way more confidence than needed. A sigh leaves her, fully aware she can no longer stop teenage boy shenanigans. Wild-named queues are thrown into the circle as it looks more like a game of Guess Who at this point.

“ I guess it's one of us.” Answers Blaise who, in the meantime, managed to pull out a book and actually read some words. ‘ This tomfoolery…’ she whispered and leaned into her friend sitting behind her.

Silence falls upon the group, the sun decides to peek from behind the could blanket and expose them to direct sunlight for a few seconds. Lorenzo declines a cigarette from Matthew as he continues to play with the girl's hair. A little ‘aha’ from her breaks the silence and they all turn to her like lazy cats disturbed from their sunbathing.

“I can ask the twins if they wanna partner up!” She says with excitement, almost jumping from her spot with it.

“ The twins?” Asks Blaise.

“ Weasely Twins.” Scoff can be heard from the blond of the group before he lays down to soak up more of the sun, seeming not aware of what sunburn is.

“ No think about it, I can distribute their little trinkets and get some money from it! It's a brilliant idea!” The girl gets up and brushes her skirt with newfound determination. Few eyes followed her, some didn't even bother to pick up their gaze from a book or opening their eyes. 

Taking a few steps to the blond she snatches her pencil back before he even registers a shadow is now covering him. Packing her bags she hears her friend.

“ Why are you even doing this?” He asks with genuine curiosity.

“Money.”

“Why?”

“ Merlin, not everyone comes from old wizard money, Berkshire.”

“ You do tho.” Silence falls upon them again as the girl has no valid answer to the argument. Deciding to pack her bags instead when a few notes fall out of her bag.

“ You have something for us there, mail girl?” Asks Mattheo with a raised eyebrow and points to the notes. Frantic nods are her answer as she picks them up and starts distributing the right notes.

“ Each of you have one, well, not you Theodor you have two, for some reason.” She says.

“ Maybe I am just that popular with the ladies."

“ I don't know man, one was really pissed when she gave it to me.” His smile flatters a bit before returning to the smirk he normally wears.

Her friend forms a pout on his face and grabs her wrist from his sitting position. “ Nothing for me?” He asks.

“ Boy, you told me not to deliver you anything, the only notes you're getting from me are the ones I take in potions.” A smile spreads on his face and he lets go.

“Oi, sunshine. Do you think I can get those potions notes too-”

“Oh Is that Fred and George? I've got to go, bye!” She grabs her stuff and hurries to the ginger twin boys that heard her calling. An offended scoff can be heard from Blaise before the group remembers that they actually have potions homework and all scurry like mice in a hurry.

Notes to deliver - 9

[hyperballart]

last nite

art donaldson x patrick zweig x reader !

art and patrick aren’t exactly subtle, and you are the push they didn’t know they needed.

(18+ pls!!)

author’s note: that one bitch (me) who doesn’t play about homoerotic friendships… this is mostly artrick but they all get nasty trust!

the swishing of the cheap beer from art’s mini fridge overlaps the song playing from the radio. it was something you recognized from this new york band you really liked—your friend had gifted you that record for your birthday a few years prior—you hummed out the tune as you sat on the desk chair of your friend’s dorm room, periodically lifting your gaze to the two boys also sharing the space.

you and patrick met at a local band’s show, that same night ended with you being pushed into the dark bathroom of the bar it was held at and you nearly swallowing each other’s tongues. he whispered into your ear about how good you tasted, how nice your ass felt in his hands, how fucking sexy you looked dancing out there. and after he bent you over the sink to get a taste of your sweet cunt and you returned the favor, the brunette gave you his number—it surprised you, that he wanted to continue seeing you and maybe take it further. it wasn’t until a couple hangouts that you met art.

he was by definition a good boy. always respectful and cordial around you, sweet, and even bashful at times. you coincidentally attended the same university—even shared common friends other than patrick. the three of you became well acquainted quickly. movie nights in art’s dorm when patrick came to visit, night drives to the beach, it was all simple and fun.

of course you and patrick hooked up whenever he came around, which seemed to frequent as he was on a month-long break from tour. on one of those particular nights, as you were riding him, somehow the topic of art came up.

“saw him at practice last week,” you take his earlobe between your teeth and slightly tug, “he’s really good.”

patrick stutters his hips and unwillingly twitches inside of you, as if images of his best friend playing flashed through his brain in those few seconds, “fuck, yeah he’s always been good.” his brain is too foggy to comprehend that he’s given away something you’ve been suspecting for a while—and you’ll keep digging to find what you really want.

you look down at him on the bed and notice how his mouth has dropped a bit further and his eyes become more slanted, you push your fingers into his mouth which he automatically starts to suck, and you ride him until he’s whimpering around them and filling you up. you’ll get something else out of him soon.

the next time happens to be the night right after, you’re at your favorite ice cream place and decide it’s the right time to keep prodding.

“you and art—you seem pretty close—how long have you known each other again?” you scrape the sides of your cup from the melted treat and look at him eating his.

“well, we went to boarding school together,” patrick speaks with some waffle cone bits crunching in his mouth—a horrible habit of his you have come to detest from the few months of knowing him—“we shared a room since we were 12, i think i’ve mentioned this,” he swallows everything in his mouth down and continues, “we are pretty close. we’d get teased for it a lot in school—i never really gave a fuck but you know art. he takes things to heart.”

“right, i can see that,” you didn’t exactly plan out how you were going to lead him to where you wanted but you get an idea, “i wanna know more. tell me some fun stories, i can imagine you two got up to a lot of trouble,” you fully turn to face him in your seat.

he racks his brain for a while and eventually, “one time i got caught with porno magazines under my bed and i blamed art. it was this whole thing—his grandma gave him an earful over the phone—god she was pissed,” a chuckle leaves him as he recalls the story, “anyway, we almost got kicked out and he didn’t speak to me for weeks. can’t remember how we made up or how i even got in possession of those magazines but we definitely learned our lesson.”

you’re giggling, “god you’re awful, what else have you put poor innocent art through?”

he turns to face you now, “i taught him everything he knows,” a smug smirk slowly takes over his expression, “ taught him how to kiss and how to jerk off. poor thing didn’t even know how to handle morning wood before i showed him.”

and there’s your chance, “so you two have like…”

he pauses and takes in your assumption, “oh god no, not like that,” a hand runs down his face quickly as a laugh of disbelief leaves him. “we’ve never—would never go there, you know? no shame to anyone who does we just—it was practice before we started dating and all that. was just helping him out.”

and well, that gave you enough of an incentive.

now you’re all in art’s dorm, a little buzzed from the alcohol and tired from a day at the beach. patrick sits on a small couch with his legs spread. both boys have decided to forgo their shirts, only in their swim trunks—patrick’s much shorter than the blonde’s. you still in your bikini top and tiny jean shorts.

“what about that girl you were seeing, what’s her name again?” patrick interrogates a clearly agitated art who sits on the floor rolling his eyes.

“i told you that’s over, she wasn’t looking for anything serious and i found out the hard way.”

“he means he saw her making out with one of his buddies at a frat party,” you add smirking over your bottle.

“okay, fuck off first of all—“

“hey, man calm down, look—“ patrick interjected, “there’s lots of chicks that would bang you, i’m sure a pretty boy like you has no problem getting laid. go charm up some nice girl that volunteers at the soup kitchen on her free time and—“

“fuck you patrick.” there’s no malice behind his words though—and you can spot the blush that takes over his pale complexion at the previous remark as he shakes his head. “it’s easy for you to say,” he looks up at you as he says it, “you guys fuck like rabbits any chance you get.”

“is that what it is then? you being pent up?” you cut in. “there’s lot of girls here who would love to fuck you, artie. you’re telling me none have caught your eye?”

art is silent, looking to see what patrick was thinking, but the latter simply looks curious—excited almost— and so he just sits picking at the hem of his shorts.

“oh i get it,” you continue, “you’re jealous. you think i’m taking your precious best friend away, don’t you?” you slide down from the chair to take a spot right next to him and whisper the next thing so only he hears, “you are jealous. don’t worry, we can share him.”

you pull back to see his pupils dilated and his mouth slightly parted, in shock and arousal—maybe even in acceptance. you can’t help the small grin as you look from him to the other still sitting on the couch, you can see his chest rising a bit heavier now.

you feel that as an agreement from both as you perch on the bed and call them both to follow at each of your sides. you can feel them eyeing you and for a split second, you see them staring at each other in a way that surpasses anything platonic they insist on having.

when you feel them both lean in to opposite sides of your neck you halt their movements. a look of confusion passes through their faces as they wait for you to explain.

“i think you guys have some making up to do,” the look on their faces creases further, “art, aren’t you curious to feel what his lips are like again? i have a feeling he has improved greatly since you were 13.”

art’s face falls, he looks at patrick in annoyance, “you said you would never tell, dude what the fuck.”

patrick just shrugs, still wanting to proceed. “i told you, that was only for practice. we’re grown now.”

“sure,” you pretend to let it go and you have on a stupid smile that he just wants to kiss off your face. you start leaning towards patrick and grant him that wish, using your hand on his jaw to give you access to his tongue. it quickly becomes heated, you land on his lap and grind yourself on the hard bulge in his trunks. his big hand gropes your ass and he moans greedily in your mouth. you pull away and let him suck and nip on the length of your neck before looking at art, who looks pitiful with his mouth hung open and his eyes lingering on the spot where patrick is occupied. a smirk returns to your swollen lips.

you tug on patricks hair and swivel even harder on his dick, leading to him groaning out a fuck me baby, and you swear you see art’s cock twitch under the layer of thin clothing. you leave patricks lap despite his efforts to keep you there, now sat on the pretty blonde who can’t seem to figure out what to do with his hands. you stop his stressing when you place both of his palms on your hips, trailing them up to your barely-covered tits where he gives a soft squeeze and lets out a little whine. you finally lean down to kiss him and it’s as you’d expect from him—tentative and soft. a kiss you’d get from a boyfriend after a nice dinner date—not from whatever this was.

he lets out hums and low moans, but you can tell he’s getting desperate. god knows how long it’s been since he’s fucked something other than his hand. you pull away and return to your spot between them. they instantly both try to catch your lips, it’s messy with all three of you licking and sucking and kissing. at this point no one knows whose mouth is whose, and it doesn’t even matter because suddenly you’re pulling off. you lean back to catch your breath and then you see them.

they lick into each other’s mouths, art is mewling and patrick grips his curls to hold him in place. they seem to catch on after a ridiculous amount of time but when they do, they stare at you while they’re heaving breaths.

“are you guys gonna take care of that?” you look down at their laps, both having matching leaks of pre bleeding through their shorts. “come on get them out, you’ve seen each other plenty before right? nothing to be shy of.”

they both listen, each erection slapping up and standing on its own. it’s obscene and you dont think you’ve ever been this wet in your life. art’s cock is so pretty—you think—pink and curved. he is smooth, you always had assumed he would be anyway. you can tell he takes good care of himself, his balls the same flushed pink he gets on his cheeks when you tease him. the tip of him is so red, a dribble of white streaming down when he notices your attention on his cock—you almost coo at it when it twitches.

then you look at patrick. that same cock you love and worship. he’s thicker in girth, your pussy pulsates when your mind trails to the stretch he gives you. his balls are heavy, and he doesn’t ever fully shave them. you like them like that—the musk and how they give friction to your clit when hes fucking you. he’s also drooling from his tip. you decide to start off slow.

you scoot forwards and extend your arms to their laps. each one of your hands holds them and at the contact, they can’t help but buck their hips. you think it’s adorable to see them synchronized like that.

“ah, shit!” patrick throws his head back and looks down at you jerking him off, then looks to his right at the other cock in your hand and shakes his head in disbelief, “i can’t—fuck—i can’t believe you’re doing this.”

“i see the way you look at him, pat,” you quicken the speed of your hands and both of them cry out, “i gave you both what you wanted, handed on a silver fucking platter. i think you should be a little more grateful. in fact, my hands are getting tired,” and with that, you cut all contact with them and you can quite literally see them wilt.

“wha- no, please,” art manages to get through a whine, “my hand doesn’t—it doesn’t feel as good i’m so hard it hurts, please—“

“who said anything about using your own hand?”you cut him off.

patrick hesitantly stretches his arm over his friend’s lap, “we’re just,” his fingers make contact with art’s dick and he almost drools, “helping each other out.” an experimental tug has his back arching and makes him shut his eyes tight.

“pat-patrick—oh fuck.”

one would think art already came by how much he’s wetting his friend’s hand, and patrick seems to be mesmerized by the sight. “holy fuck art, look at how much you’re spilling,” as if on cue, that makes him squirt out more. art is gripping his sheets and his eyes dart from the hand stroking him fast and the boy in front of him.

“i’m—don’t go so fucking fast,” art tries to get out, “it’s been a while if—nghh—if you don’t slow down i’m gonna—fuck!” patrick clearly enjoys this as he can’t help laughing at his state.

“don’t tell me you’re a virgin, artie,” he slows down but continues teasing, “thought i taught you how to hold off better than that.”

and while you’d love to keep watching art squirm under his torture, you stop him, “i got an idea.”

patrick reluctantly pulls away and they both now stare expectantly, “push both of your cocks together, here like this—“ you direct them to sit with their legs spread in front of each other, overlapping and then you position them how you want them.

they can’t even speak, they’re just panting and looking down at the contact until you continue, “come on pat, hold both of them together,” you watch as he does so and grimaces trying to hold off, “look at that, your tips are kissing—how cute.”

they both whine and patrick mutters a shut up under his breath.

after a minute of heavy breathing, patricks large hand slowly strokes down on both of their cocks. it’s so wet, the sound of the slicking lewdly filling up the room but the sound of their cries is almost enough to drown it out. art is almost sobbing at this point, you’ve never heard someone sound so desperate. they almost can’t bare the friction of each other, their tangled legs twitching and shaking.

you almost start to get annoyed at how slow patrick is going for the sake of making the feeling last, but in a way you think it’s sweet. the years they’ve held off on each other finally leading to this—they deserved it. you’re still annoyed tho.

“go faster,” as the words leave your mouth they both mewl and shake their heads, “you look so hot like this, i’m so wet. i’m thinking of letting you both fuck me��at the same time. just like this, both in my cunt,” patrick’s hand loosens his grip he is almost shivering now, he has to hold off, “why’d you let go, hm?” you pull his hand back on, “i want you both to imagine it, it’s gonna be a tighter fit than this,” you pull your hand over patrick’s and tighten the grip hard, “there you go.”

art can’t even make out words anymore, the second he heard you say you wanted them both at once, his ears started ringing. as if that wasn’t enough, the tightened grip made him moan out pleas over and over. when he looks down, he knows he can’t hold longer and he lets you both know, “i’m gonna, i can’t it’s too much, too much, too tight i—“

you take this as your chance to do what you wanted since you saw the tent in his shorts, you lean down to where they are connected and suckle on his tip and that does it. he sobs out a curse and starts twitching, he cums all over your lips and patrick, you can’t believe how much is coming out of him.

patrick just about loses his mind when he sees it all happen. it’s a miracle he lasted over two minutes like this and he’s about to pass out, “oh fuck me, yeah fucking soak that dick—oh god— you’re so wet—how do you get this fucking—“ he suddenly yanks art by his neck and fucks his tongue into his mouth again, and even tho he is still dizzy from his orgasm, he kisses back just as messily. that’s the final straw for patrick to cum all over them and squeeze their tips together for the last time that night.

you watch it all happen with a lazy smile. they both lay down, still out of it while you scratch their heads gently and murmur sweet affirmations to them. you’re between them and it feels just right. you don’t need to talk about what happened just yet. just sleepily kiss each other until you knock out.

they’ll make up not making you cum tomorrow, you can picture them both licking between your legs and when they take turns suckling your clit, you’ll pretend not to notice how they’re jerking each other off out of your sight <3

[fallingdownhell]

Hi it's me again 😅

Is it okay if I request something very specific and angry cause I'm bad at writing fanfics.

Well if it's okay could you do a Ayato x Reader

«Where Reader is in an arrangement marriage with Ayato but despite this fact she somehow ended up falling in love with him. But for Ayato the Marriage was nothing other than a political stunt. So when you get a sickness you keep it a secret from him until Thoma had a enough tells Ayato but before Ayato could rescue you, you had already succumbed the illness. And lay on the floor in your own pool of blood. That was the day Ayato regretted he's life decisions the most. Had he just listened to he's heart instead of his brain, just maybe you would have told him»

Is this too much to ask?

Of course! I'm so sorry I'm so late with your request. Still hope that it's what you imagined it to be. Pairing: Ayato x Reader Content: female reader; arranged marriage; unhappy marriage; Hanahaki AU; blood; major character death; unhappy ending (if I forgot to mention something, please tell me and I'll add it!) Word count: 2,1k words Requested by: @smaika Hope you enjoy<3

Catching your breath again, you stare down at the bloodied tissue in your hands, mind empty.

It's gotten even worse now. The petals, that were smeared with blood, were now also accompanied by a few thornes scattered here and there.

Now you knew where that scratchy and uncomfortable feeling in your throat came from, at least. It was those thornes, most likely.

With shaking hands, you grab the headboard of the bed, sitting down on the bed while you try to calm yourself down again. The coughing fit has gone by, but there was still blood dripping from your lips. At least you didn't stain the bed sheets, or it would probably have rosen suspicion from the housekeepers.

It has been a few weeks now since this whole thing has started. It began with just a general feeling of getting sick. Just some slight nausea and a sore throat, nothing to wrack your brain too hard about. But then the coughing started, and nothing, no medicine or whatever else you tried seemed to help against it.

And then the blood and flower petals came into the mix. When you coughed up the first red petal, you instantly realized what it was you were suffering through. Coincidentally, that was also the moment when Thoma walked in on you and figured it out, as well.

He had been worried sick about you, seeing as you didn't seem to get better at all. That day, he returned from the city with a new medicine he had planned on giving to you, but when he walked in and saw you, hunched over the sink in the bathroom, blood and bloodied petals in there, it didn't take him long to figure it out.

He was already halfway out the room, hellbent on telling the Master of the estate, and your husband. But you begged him not to, pleaded to him to keep it between the two of you.

Thoma did not understand your reasoning behind this request, but he saw the desperation behind your eyes, and he just couldn't bring himself to act against your wishes. Because no matter the professional relationship you two had, you were also friends. And he just couldn't betray a friend like that.

So he reluctantly agreed, promising you not to tell a word about this to Ayato. But that didn't mean that he wouldn't still go out and try to find a cure for you.

And here you were now, weak and sick, sitting on the bed you shared with your husband and contemplating how you got to this point in your life. But deep down, you already knew how this all came to be, and also, how this whole thing would end..

Your marriage with Ayato was by far not the happy fairytale you had always dreamed it would be. The arrangements of the marriage had been taken care of years prior, without any of you two having a say in it in the first place.

You did only get to meet Ayato a total of three times before you were married of to him. And despite all those facts, you couldn't bring yourself to mind it all that much. The Ayato you got to know over the course of those few meetings was a kind and gentle one, respectful of your wishes, although a bit too caught up in matters of work and politics.

It didn't take much for you to actually fall in love with him. A few nice words and compliments from him, a nice gesture there and you were head over heels for him. And then seeing how kindly he treated his staff and his sister only sealed the deal for you.

You couldn't wait to get married to him and recieving that same loving and respectful treatment from him as his wife, looking forward to the days that would be ahead of you, together with him by your side as your husband.

What you didn't expect however, was the complete turn he did one the marriage ceremony was dealt with.

Every time you tried to engage in conversation with him, trying to get to know your husband better, he would shut you down or just flat out ignore you. Every time you tried to touch him, even as innocent as laying a hand on his shoulder to get his attention, he would push you away from him.

You were attending social events with him, though he never held your hand and didn't bother to keep you around him. You slept in the same room together, in the same bed even, and he has never made a move on you even once this entire time.

Often times, he comes to bed long after you've already fallen asleep and is already awake again by the time you get up in the morning. At first you brushed it off as him being crowded with work, or even a bit shy about this new arrangement. However, since his behaviour towards you never changed, you couldn't help but begin to think that there was an actual intent behind it. Wether that was because he didn't like this marriage, or you specifically, you couldn't tell, because he wouldn't talk to you.

But you were certain that those events are what led you to your current situation at hand.

Hanahaki disease..

A disease stemming from unrequitted love towards another person. One that would kill the affected person if those feelings were not returned.

No one really knows how this disease came to be and there wasn't really much that could be done about it, either. Once affected with it, there were only really a few ways to handle this situation.

One. You could simply do nothing at all, but that would lead to your certain death.

Two. There were surgeries available, though these procedures are still very much experimental, and a huge side effect would be loosing any and all feelings towards the person that the affected one had feelings for in the first place.

Or three. You could tell Ayato about your predicament. But knowing him by now, he wouldn't care about it, which would only result in you nearing your end sooner.

You appreciated Thoma for going out there and trying to find some form of other cure, but you and him were both well aware that there wasn't any. He was reaching for solutions that just weren't there.

You had briefly considered the option of undergoing such an experimental surgery, but ultimately decided against it. It just didn't feel right to you, staying married to a man that you wouldn't feel anything for. No joy, happiness, sadness.. nothing. But, were you really ready to give your life for him...?

A moment later, your train of thoughts got interrupted by the opening door of your bedroom, a familiar blonde head poking through the opening. You looked at Thoma, who carefully entered the room and closed the door behind him, kneeling down in front of you.

He looked at the bloodied tissue in your hands, noticing the thornes mixed in there.

"It got worse..", were his quietly spoken words. You couldn't muster a respone, only a small, weak nod. Thoma then gently pulled the tissue from your graps, throwing it in the trash, before he returned to your side.

"I'll help you lay down. You need to rest, (Name)."

You just nodded again, not having the energy to argue with him right now. He helped you to lay down on the bed, a warm hand brushing over your forehead and almost immediately after that, you blacked out from pure exhaustion.

........

Thoma has had enough. He had no idea why you were so hellbent on not telling Ayato about your condition, but he couldn't take it anymore. Even if it meant breaking his promise to you, he could no longer just stand by and watch his friend wither away and die while he could do nothing about it.

If there was a chance that all this could be fixed, he just had to take the risk now. He's waited far too long already, the guilt eating away at him more and more with each passing day.

Quick, determined footsteps echoed from the halls as the blonde aimed for the office of the head master of the Yashiro commission, knowing that he usually locks himself in there the entire day to get his work done.

Out of pure politeness, Thoma still knocked, though he did not wait for an answer from his Lord this time around. Instead, he swiftly opened the door and entered the room, quickly closing the door behind him again as to not cause too much attention from the other staff.

Ayato, sitting at his table, hunched over many papers, did not even look up when the blonde went and stood right in front of the desk.

"Did something important come up, Thoma?", he asks, though the tone in his voice is void of any actual interest in his answer.

"Yes, my Lord. It's about (Name)."

At this, Ayato sighed heavily, dropping his pen and squinting his eyes, rubbing his temples like the topic brought him great pain.

"Look, I know what you want to say, but we've been over this. It was an arranged marriage that was mutually agreed upon by both our parents. Just because she's my wife does not mean-!"

"She's dying, Ayato!", Thoma interrupted him and that sentence quickly shut the Commissioner up. Would he not have been so shocked over the statement itself, he would have been shocked about the untypical rude behaviour displayed by Thoma right now.

"..What do you mean by that?", he asked instead after a few beats of pure silence, in which Ayato tried to comprehend what was just said to him.

"Exactly that. (Name) is dying if you don't get up and finally talk to them about everything. I know you like to tell yourself that you don't feel anything for her and that you're keeping her out of things, but you're just making it worse for her.

I.. I don't think she can make it much longer."

Ayato wanted to laugh. Surely, this was all just a cruel joke the both of you decided to play on him, maybe your newest strategie to get him to pay attention to you. But this is Thoma standing in front of him. He doesn't joke about this kind of stuff.

Realizing now how dire the situation must be, Ayato quickly got up and headed towards your shared bedroom, where Thoma told him you were resting at the moment. The sooner he got this all handled with, the better.

Soon after, he stood infront of the bedroom door, gently knocking on it. He didn't want to startle you in case you were still sleeping in there. When no response came, he gently slid the door open, only to freeze in shock because of the scene that played out in front of him.

There you were, laying on the floor, your body pale and almost lifeless, as a puddle of blood was next to your head, blood still dripping from your lips.

"(Name)!" Without even realizing what he was doing at first, Ayato rushed right over to your side, turning you to your back. When you didn't show any reaction however, he began shouting for help while tears began to form in his eyes..

This couldn't be happening..

Not like this...

He didn't even notice when Thoma and a bunch of other people, who had also heard his desperate shouting, entered the room. They were gathering around you, Thoma frantically dropping down and searching for a pulse from you.

And Ayato knew..

He knew that you were gone, even before he saw that sad look in Thoma's eyes and the slow, little, almost unnoticable shake of his head.

But... this had to have been just a dream, right? A nightmare, that he's going to wake up from soon.

Surely, this wasn't really happening... he couldn't just have lost you like this..

He thought he was doing the right thing by keeping you at a distance, keeping you out of the dangers that dealing with certain people does involve. He didn't want for you to corrupt like him, to stay your pure and unapologetically kind self.

To know now that this was the wrong decision, that he basically killed you himself...

He should have just induldged you, talked to you, treating you like he should have, like you really were his wife..

Maybe then all of this wouldn't have happened..

Maybe then, you'd still be alive right now...

But now it's too late. And all he could do right now, is to hold you in his arms, right here with Thoma, and mourn the way things went...

[cthonic-bunny]

2. Personal Synastry and Composite Experiences and Observations

Do not interact if you are a minor. (18+)

Venus in 1H synastry: This one is full of compliments. You both love staring at each other, and telling the other how attractive they are. The house person can be the perfect example of what aesthetic the Venus person’s dream person would follow. The Venus person can try to embody that aesthetic more than they did before so they can show they are a good physical match for the house person. “You would look good with me.” Bonding over shared music taste(s). I think the Venus person will want to romance the house person even if that isn’t something they normally do. Venus could love how the 1H person displays their feminine side. Venus likes to ask for pictures and selfies from the house person, and can create a dynamic where you send one another photos regularly. The house person likes to look at photos from the Venus person to gush about what they look like, because they are also supremely attracted to Venus (I think Venus just has a more natural way of expressing that desire). Also as the house person who identifies as a woman, venus’ compliments and pursuit of me has made me feel more feminine than I ever have in a romantic dynamic. Even my mannerisms are coincidentally more feminine and gentle in Venus’ presence. Venus definitely increased my self esteem.

Mars in 1H synastry: I think you two could make very good gym partners together because you love each other’s bodies. Some people say this is a “s*x on the first date placement,” and I concur. You find each other sexy! You compliment each other’s physical appearance and bodies often, and very much so during the act. The Mars person is very very direct with the house person that it’s almost overwhelming or intimidating. Being the house person, I did often feel like they had just wanted me for my body or that’s what they found to be the most interesting part about me until the interaction progressed. If there aren’t other good “soft and sweet” placements in the synastry chart or in the composite, this could be a pretty annoying placement. The Mars person did admit to me that they would bring up sex or something that would irritate me just to get a reaction because they didn’t know if they stimulate me outside of those vibes. If you’re in a relationship with someone else, or show interest in other people, the Mars person can want to fight your partner so they can be the one next to you LOL. This placement also involves a lot of staring. Being touched, even regularly, by Mars turned me on more than other people ever touching me the same way even if I liked them. Mars can love to grab the house person’s face a lot during sex. Maybe for some people who are into it, Mars can want to consensually slap the house person during sex. The Mars will like to be publicly “disrespectful” about you, because they want to mark you as theirs or will for real fight for you. They can see you as someone they want to protect, or you trigger some protective instinct. They might be a lot more physically stronger than you. Sending each other pictures of your body’s changes. You both like how the other defends themselves or bond over your argumentative or aggressive sides. As the house person with the Mars person being a man, I find his masculinity so attractive it hurts. He has slowly changed my perception on what I want a man to look like 😩

Sun in 11H synastry/composite: You guys get along almost immediately. This is a low maintenance friendship, because the vibes make up for all the times you don’t see each other. You just like how the other one approaches friendship. Very open-minded. Probably met through mutual friends, and these friends probably didn’t immediately notice certain similarities you have to one another. Once they see you guys link though, they can be surprised they never noticed it before. You guys may have automatically assumed, even if flirting was involved, that this interaction would remain generally platonic more than anything. People who are not in your friend group can also notice you two becoming friends immediately, because for some reason it stood out. As the sun person, I really liked listening to the house person’s dreams. Hearing the house person speak about how they handle their interpersonal relationships made me value my boundaries more and reminded me to focus more on myself than giving too much of my energy to other people. Essentially you can help each other dismiss certain people pleasing tendencies in one another. You don’t have to try to please one another either, your authentic self is enough to give each other pleasure. A natural sense of familiarity between you two. It’s funny hearing about each other’s quirks. You are encouraged to show your eccentricities around one another. Instant bestie vibes! You can feel like evil twins together in some cases LOL

Venus in 11H synastry: Honestly, in some cases, I feel like you may have met this person because they were previously involved with a friend or ex-friend. The friend you’re attracted to, but don’t need to pursue because you also get the same joys and benefits from your friendship. Friends with benefits. Friends to lovers. You may have started dating or flirting online for a while before meeting. I think this is another sign of shared music taste and interests. As the Venus person, I first grew some sort of interest because the house person posted a video of themselves online playing guitar and I found that super attractive. Maybe the Venus person can be an online supporter or promoter of the house person’s creative outlets. Never meeting in person but having a lot of the same mutuals you both know in real life, and then meeting in person later on by yourselves, maybe in a “date” setting.

Moon in 9H synastry: Here, the house person can introduce the moon person to different religions, or likes to talk about religion with the moon person. The house person can held guide the moon person on the importance of higher education or on the acquisition of knowledge. Long distance relationship. Wanting to be together but you somehow met once you two no longer lived in the same city. The moon person can feel like the house person is one of the smartest people they have met, and can feel somewhat intimidated by the house person because of it. You two can feel really free in one another’s presence. You can talk about anything. You two can turn casual conversation into something philosophical together. Sharing your personal philosophies with one another. Having drastically different life circumstances that have shaped you, but also having some foundational similarities. The moon person might be contradictory to the house person’s beliefs, but this can just stretch curiosity. It can also make the house person analyze different gaps in their previous opinions on certain organizations or institutions. Disagreements on certain topics doesn’t seem to escalate into arguments, but rather into informed discussions. Feeling out of reach to one another. I have seen a post referencing how the moon person can feel like the house person is out of their league, and I think this can stem from, in some cases, not being intelligent or well-rounded enough to stimulate the house person long term. This can just be a feeling and not at all be the case, because the house person learns a lot more from the moon than the moon realizes. You guys can spark the other’s adventurous side. You guys maybe only get to meet while the other is vacationing in your area. The Moon person can unconsciously inspire the house person to teach others about their speciality, such as getting you into blogging about an interest you talked to them about.

Composite Virgo Mars: Having to schedule when you two can have sex (maybe it’s long distance for a period of time). Arguments aren’t aggressive, but rather a hyper-analytical discussion that can be equally as irritating. Cleaning each other after sex. Being attracted to the other person abdominal area. When you guys start taking action towards advancing your connection, you stop eating out of nervousness. Maybe your fights stem from making one another nervous rather than a real issue itself. Bickering when you’re not with one another more so than when you’re in person. Having high expectations of one another once you become intimate partners. Wanting to come off as perfect for the other. Being extremely attentive with one another and immediately responding to any shift in energy because it can make you nervous. Really wanting to know what the other person is thinking and feeling in times of silence or during sex. Different sources have made this placement out to seem “sexually repressed,” but that is not always the case. Maybe circumstances can suppress the frequency they get to go at it, but if time permitted it could be on sight all the time. Not wanting to do anything that upsets the other or makes them uncomfortable, so lots of checking in on each other during the act to see if it’s mutually enjoyable and adapt accordingly. After sex with this person you might get extremely productive in your own personal life! Their presence in your life encourages you to get your life together and not be “messy.”

[love-byers]

discogate, revisited

the stranger things directors are freaks about centering and symmetry. go watch any episode i promise you'll see loads of shots where everything is perfectly centered to the point it can't be coincidental. so when a stationary shot is so obviously not centered, it probably means something.

so why is that disco ball not perfectly in the middle of the screen. why. it's literally making his head shine. all of the other lights above the rink meet at the discoball, so it draws even more attention to it.

a disco ball is the center of attention. it shines brighter than anything else in the room.

to me this is a clear representation of what was going on that day between the love triangle. on the surface it seems like mike isn't paying attention to will and has all his attention on el, will is a third wheel being ignored by the couple. but we later learn that wasn't true at all, at least for mike. he was watching will all day and wanted to talk to him. "You were moping, you were rolling your eyes, you were barely talking you basically sabotaged the whole day."

all of mikes attention that day was on will. he was talking to el, but he wasn't truly paying attention to her because if he was, he would've noticed el was lying and definitely would've noticed el's entire demeanor shift when angela showed up. she so clearly didn't want to go with angela, but mike just let it happen. because that wasn't his focus. we're talking about the same dude from

"He's quiet today."

"He's always quiet:"

also notice how as the camera zooms on el the ball is between mike and will.

and as that happens, el is trying to hide how upset she is at her situation, her lie. literally forcing a smile. i think this is meant to show the reality of the day. el and mike we're not focused on each other. el wanted to come off like a popular cool girl, lying about parties and friends. her goal of the day was not to bond with mike, but convince him that she was super cool and her life in lenora was great. mikes gay ass was pretending like he didn't care about will and wasn't paying attention to him. i did an elaborate analysis on mike's behavior that day here. and both of these lies were exposed. el's because of angela, and mikes because of will. mike got so fed up with will not paying attention to him that he literally could not hold up the act anymore. it got under his skin so bad he literally couldn't take it anymore.

and both mike and el five reasons as to why their day was ruined.

el, to angela: You ruined my day.

mike, to will: You were rolling your eyes, you were moping, you were barely talking, you basically sabotaged the whole day!

there are several examples of lights surrounding couples in ST, but the first one i think of is jopper.

no, that lamp was not there coincidentally, it was on purpose

no, the discoball was not there accidentally.

and this comes back to what i talked about first, symmetry and centering. joyce and hop on either sides of the screen, the lamp perfectly in the center, and they even chose a place where the wall has a straight line so the lamp could fit perfectly in it. and it looks super nice. and there's also the association of st couples with electricity and sparks of romance.

so i ask again, what the fuck is up with that discoball. cause something is UP.

discogate you will always be loved by me

[neil-gaiman]

Dear Mr. Gaiman,

I hope you are doing well. I'm sending this ask again for the fourth time because the first three don't seem to have reached you. It's OK if you don't answer though.

1) I keep plagiarizing accidentally and it's frustrating me. I came up with "Crying has always fascinated me as a concept. It is the first thing humans do after getting out of the womb. I wonder why they think it’s a sign of weakness, when it’s what proves that they’re alive!” and was rather proud to have written it only to find out some weeks later that Charlotte Brönte wrote a similar thing in Jane Eyre. I'm certain that I have never read this line before in my life, let alone the book. I also wrote the line "I loved you like a blind preacher in a godless temple", then realized that I came up with it while thinking about this comic called, The God of Arepo. And then I found out from your reply to an ask that you have a gay character called Foxglove. Coincidentally, my main character has the same name and the same sexual orientation. If all my new ideas are just other people's ideas recycled, am I still a writer?

2) Now, a sillier question: I was in a state between awake and asleep and for some reason, when I heard Aziraphale's voice whisper, "Sometimes it takes more than a snap of the fingers to perform a miracle." I don't understand how or why or if this is grammatically accurate. Have you ever written such a quote before? (If not, can I keep it?) If yes, what does it mean?

Please forgive me for wasting your time with a long ask.

Sincerely,

A confused, teenage writer

It's not plagiarism when you notice that someone else said something similar to you after you wrote it. That's just you living in world in which lots of people have made a lot of art for thousands of years. Plagiarism is when you read something and then write that thing pretending it's yours.

And the quotes you bring back from dreams are free.

[lunartuness]

Spoilers for Book of Bill

Thoughts on Bill talking about Ford

I was not prepared for canon Billford in the year 2024 and yet here we are.

But seriously, I'm kinda surprised how much Bill actually liked and valued Ford? Obviously it's in a horrible, toxic, never come within the same continent as them kind of way but it's just, I always kind of figured their relationship (while obviously adoring from Ford's end due to Journal 3) was mainly just Bill humoring Ford long enough until he no longer needs him. Like, 'yeah, sure, of course you're special, I definitely believe in you' sort of nonsense.

But in Bill's book it's implied multiple times he had as close to a crush on Ford as he's probably capable of. I mean, the whole 'love cage' section is literally verbatim what he did to Ford (and just wait until they're mentally broken enough to confess their true feelings! Fear and love are basically the same thing!) And in the valentine's section he talks about leaving mice, which again, he did for Ford's birthday, and then when he wasn't happy about that, got him drunk enough to have a good time (implied kinda forcibly? since Ford declined beforehand). Then there's the fact he literally calls Fiddleford a third wheel (also coincidentally after we just learn Fiddleford spent hours on handmade gifts for Ford and forgot to get his wife anything).

And when Ford finally does catch on and things go bad? Bill tries first to talk with Ford through the zombies (to manipulate him, of course, but also Admit it, you'd miss me. I have missed you, and Bill actually smiles.) And then leaves little sticky notes asking nicely to talk. When he finally gets mad enough to escalate, he still does so in a very not-violent-for-Bill-way. Sure, killing Ford wouldn't help him but we know how messed up Bill can get. And yet what does he do? He leaves Ford's body to almost freeze, only to have a warm fire and a love song playing when he wakes up. He causes mild public disturbances and gives him an obnoxious tattoo. When he finally, finally snaps is when we start to see more of the Bill we got in the show when he tortures Ford a bit. But even that is mild?

Like, Bill rearranged a man's face for fun and takes joy in destroying the Nightmare Realm. But after threating Ford he leaves him unharmed. Very mentally scarred, yes, but safe and intact. He even gives him three days to get his life together. And then treats it like a messy breakup when Ford finally breaks free. Hell, it seems like he was more upset about losing Ford than losing the portal.

All this is to say that I think from Bill's point of view he was being genuinely kind to Ford. He gave him gifts, complimented him, and tried to work things out peacefully when Ford started pulling away (again, his very messed up version of peaceful, but the point still stands).

So when they do finally meet again? Bill still offers Ford a spot next to him. Again, I originally thought this was more playing into Ford's ego while taking a cheap shot at him (i.e. you'll fit in great with the freaks!), but by now it's obvious he wants Ford. He's petty and cruel and horribly abusive about it, but in his own twisted way he likes Ford. A lot. Enough to show mercy (or at least not be as violent as he could be) and to try and give him multiple chances to come back, no apology needed!

And the worst part is Bill knows this. Bill's trying to make this relationship work. He feels connected to Ford in a way he quite possibly hasn't felt with anyone else. And he knows its doomed to fail. In his mind he has to destroy everything he touches and everything he cares about. Any other connections he has are either superficial or dead to him (usually literally). This relationship will end the same way, it's just in Bill's nature. To him, that's all his relationships are capable of being.

All this just makes me sad and adds so much depth and I'm obsessed. There's just something about self-destructive and truly cruel characters having moments where they wish they weren't that way. Where they'll come the closest they ever can to apologizing for how they are.

(Also Bill literally wanted Ford to get a tattoo saying 'If lost return to Bill' like we cannot just ignore that oh my god)

[featguler]

it made us restless ────── my god, this reminds me of when we were young.

lewis hamilton is seen reconnecting with an old lover.

⌗ pairing : lewis hamilton x reader ⌗ tags : reader is female, and her faceclaim is established. reader is a singer. not proofread, possibly shitty. ⌗ notes : this is my 200 followers special!! a different sports!! i haven't done a 100 followers special because i'm technically supposed to write for a football athlete that is not from real madrid, but i haven't decided who i wanna do for that so... you get this first :3 also i tried doing something different with the header!!! title and description is from 'when we were young' by adele ♡ masterlist.

FACECLAIM 𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑ yura yunita ( instagram )

DISCLAIMER 𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑ 𐙚 i am not affiliated with yura yunita, lewis hamilton, or anyone mentioned in this fic 𐙚 any similarities in name, time, and place is purely coincidental 𐙚 do not mind the time stamps 𐙚 click on the pictures if it seems blurry

ynusername

liked by hamiltonsource, ynluvr, lewishamilton, and others

ynusername some of that ldt (long distance tennis) 🤪 @.lewishamilton tagged lewishamilton view all comments

lewishamilton <33 ❤️ by author

ynusername <33

username okay so anyone else got recommended this post on their timeline... seven years later...

username let me tell you about the heart attack i got... username i fr thought they were getting back together

lewishamilton i totally beat you though ❤️ by author

ynusername liar liar pants on fire → lewishamilton my pants aren't on fire?? → ynusername i wouldn't know you're half the world away → lewishamilton aw sorry pretty baby :( <33 username oh... this relationship wasn't a hoax... → username ??? 😭😭😭 username they were CUTE cute huh..

username i love you my mother and my father please adopt me

username wow seeing my comment from 7 years ago here is crazy... → username 😭😭😭

username this must be a sign from the universe huh...??? HUH???

username it's literally just the instagram algorithm fucking things up again calm down username REAL i'm not even following y/n

yourfriend cutiessss! ❤️ by author

ynusername i love you! 🥺

ynsource

liked by ynfanaccount, ynluvr, hamiltonsource, and others

ynsource my sources say that y/n is rekindling with an old lover 🤭 tagged ynusername view all comments

username and what sources are these

ynsource trust me → username LITERALLY "trust me bro" SOURCE???

username creating unnecessary drama

username i feel like it's been a few months ❤️ by author

ynsource 🫣

hamiltonsource wait can u tell me ❤️ by author

ynsource ofc baby username not the ship going so strong that their fan accounts are also in a love affair

username that's a dinner for TWO...

username she's allowed to have friends you know → username or other men idk → username no other men → username ?????

ynusername

liked by ynsource, lewishamilton, and others

ynusername some fresh air before the tour 🤝 which dates will you be going? :-) <33 view all comments

username oh she's teasing us

username guys.......... they're obviously talking again right

ynusername i'll see you all!!!

username I'LL SEE YOU I LOVE YOU username SEE YOU SEE YOU SEE YOU username vitamin SEE YOU!!! ❤️ by author → ynusername ohh that's cute → username WAIT ILY THANK YOU FOR REPLYING → ynusername <33

username I'M GOING TO THE ARLINGTON SHOW QUEEN ❤️ by author

ynsource work those hamstrings 😍

username i feel like i'm in a cult

hamiltonsource we will... be seeing you <33

ynusername which dates? xo <33 ynsource HOW DID YOU GET A REPLY BUT NOT ME??? @.hamiltonsource → hamiltonsource i'm just better baby

username london 2nd night! <33 ❤️ by author

username she's fucking with us right

georgerussell63 monaco date ❤️ by author

ynusername which obviously exists → georgerussell63 🤣 ❤️ by author username great now we have both of *****' ex interacting with one another

username why are we so afraid to say the word lewis

username SHHHH THAT'S FORBIDDEN AROUND HERE → username wtf??? i'll @ him idc @.lewishamilton → username real → username @.lewishamilton

ynusername

liked by ynsource, ynluvr, yniloveu others

ynusername found some gems for a couple of years ago 🥰 view all comments

username were you getting married 😹

ynusername 🤫

ynsource to WHO!?!?!?!?

username happy bday queen

username it's not her bday yet 😭

ynluvr oh you are GORGEOUS gorgeous ❤️ by author

ynusername <33

username white is fr her colour

username whoever is going to marry her will be so lucky to see her walking down the aisle... 🥺

lewishamilton

liked by ynusername, hamiltonsource, and others

lewishamilton First paddock birthday in a while 🎂🥳 <33 tagged ynusername view all comments

ynusername happy birthday to me!!! ❤️ by author

lewishamilton Birthday girl! → ynusername :-)

username HARDLAUNCH?????

username me when the world didn't end in 2015

username my mom thinks i'm insane for tossing my phone across the room after seeing this

hamiltonsource happy birthday mom @.ynusername

ynsource go away that's MY mom??? → hamiltonsource OUR mom 🥰

username HEEELLLLLLOOOOO??

username OMG.....

username wait why am i emotional

username seeing lewis post y/n gave me such intense whiplash i think i was transported back to 2011

username i have no one to send this to

[panic-in-the-multiverse]

B-u-c-k-y? Bucky

Pairings: father!Bucky Barnes x child!reader, featuring Steve Rogers x child!reader and Tony Stark x child!reader (all platonic)

Imagine: The beginning of your relationship with your father and a glimpse at the progress

Warnings: angst, fluff, mention of Hydra, mention of child mistreatment, mention of experiments, reader describes as tiny to clarify more that hydra treated them bad, mention of medical equipment such as syringes, not proofread, if you find anything else please tell me

A/N so don’t know where this came from but I haven’t been able to write something in months so I’m just happy to be able to write again hopefully, don’t know if I like it or not but here we go anyway enjoy

Kinda short, dunno about 2000 words or so

might make more parts to this

Sparks lit up the dark corridor as Bucky and Steve walked down the stairs to be met with red lights flashing above each door as the alarms blasted their annoyingly high pitched sound that made your ears ring afterwards. One look at each other, they gave a nod and split up as they took one side each of the corridor.

The first room Bucky opened was filled with cabinets made of plastic and in each was different kinds of test tubes with what looked like some kind of poisonous liquid. Syringes were spread out over the desks neatly. Bucky felt chills run down his spine as he saw the hospital bed (or more like a table with white a quilt?) in the middle of the room. Handcuffs made to restrain a person laid neatly on the bed. Blood covering the sides of the bed and his mind went back to 1945, when Arnim Zola experimented on him. Which had coincidentally also been at a hydra base. His gun raised as he searched the room for any kind of lifeforms, when he found none he went on to the next door.

This continued for at least five more doors, some of them being lab rooms and some what looked like prison cells fortified with extra protection, meaning whoever had once been inside couldn’t have fled on their own.

When he opened the sixth door, Bucky scanned the room and had it not been for the red lights flashing once in a while and the lamp that flickered out a dull light he would've missed the tiny child in the room. Knees pressed to their chest. Hospital gown clinging to their skin from blood and cold sweat. The room had cold chills and even for Bucky who tolerated the cold more than others he could feel the freezing temperature in the room. He lowered his gun and put on the softest expression he could muster during these circumstances. Bucky glanced out the door and yelled out with a soft voice (to not startle the child) once for Steve, Bucky’s gaze not soon after fell back to the quivering child, that was you, who stared at him with wide scared eyes.

Bucky took a careful step towards you as he kneeled down slightly to put his gun onto the floor. He gave you what was supposed to look like a kind smile but looked more like a grimace as he thought about what you must have been through. As soon as you saw Bucky coming closer he watched as dark blue smoke covered your tiny frame and not a second after you were gone. Bucky stopped in his tracks and looked around the room for you. His eyes fell on the coroner farthest away from him. You had covered your ears with your hands and your eyes were shut. Your body was tense and knees still pressed to your chest as you quivered further into the corner. Bucky stayed in place not knowing entirely what to do. At that moment he saw Steve walk through the door sparing a glance towards you before back at Bucky his shield raised as they both heard people run their way. With a sigh from Bucky they both left you for the time being as Hydra soldiers started to fill the end of the corridor.

As soon as you heard the sound of shots (your hands not able to muffle out the sounds that came right outside of the room you resided in) die down you opened your eyes. You watched with curious eyes as Bucky (not that you knew his name) walked into the room once more. Like before he put his gun down and gave you a kind smile, this time his hand slowly reached out for you. He watched as you pressed yourself girder into the corner as you stared at his hand.

“hey, hey, okay, it’s okay” Bucky raised both his hands into the air to show he meant no harm as he cautiously took another step closer. “I won’t hurt you” Steve watched from the door opening as Bucky interacted with you. His gaze shifted to the metal objects (or what looked like toys for children) in the room that had started to slightly hover over the ground, including Bucky’s gun.

Bucky’s eyes glanced towards the hovering objects and was a tiny bit glad that you hadn’t done anything to his left arm. “What's your name?” he let out a sigh as you didn't answer knowing you probably wouldn't answer anything he asked you, hell he didn’t even know if you could understand him. His head tilted slightly as he took slow steps forward until he knelt in front of you. The metal objects (except his arm) are rising higher into the air.

“are you alright, you hurt?” He said clearly as he watched you start to pick at the side of your arm where blood was running down onto your hospital gown. He watched as you picked at multiple wounds, some of them he could clearly see were from syringes and his eyes saddened. Both Bucky and Steve watched as you pressed yourself deeper into the corner, as you tried to hide the many bruises that littered your body.

“can I-we help you, can you let us help you out of here?” Bucky gestured with his hand to him and Steve as he said the word us. Once more he didn’t get a verbal answer but instead he got you to move out of the corner slightly. Bucky held his hand out to you once more and watched as you carefully placed your tiny hand in his much bigger one. He couldn’t help but to give a soft smile once more towards you.

"Can you walk?” And yet again there was no answer. Bucky looked at you with an uncertain expression as you stood up. Your body swaying from side to side. He carefully and slowly to make sure you could stop him if you wanted to, took you into his arms. Making sure you wouldn’t fall he stood up straight and started to walk towards Steve who smiled slightly at Bucky as he watched you shut your eyes and bury your head into his chest. The metal objects all crashed to the ground with a loud clatter of noise in various directions.

This had all been four months ago and Bucky had finally started to get you to trust him enough for you to let him teach you how to talk, write and read. By now you also trusted the rest of the avengers enough so that you wouldn’t try to hide from all of them except Steve (excluding Bucky). Tony would most days let you sit beside him as he made new iron man suits and at some time along the way he’d let you help him by using your powers to bend a metal the way he wanted it to be. This would in the end result in you running up to Bucky proud of your accomplishments and for Bucky to ruffle your hair and tell you how proud he was. These interactions with Tony also led to you having more control over your powers at least one of them. You still tended to teleport yourself unintentionally to the other side of the room if you were scared.

Today it just so happened that Bucky held another lesson with you to help you speak. So far you were able to say yes and no and some other basic things such as “hungry” and “tired”. However even though you were starting to learn you still most of the time stuck to being nonverbal and only shook your head yes or no or shrugged your shoulders when you didn’t know.

At this moment Bucky had tried to teach you to say his name and so far your tries had been good but as he knew you were a slow learner which he realized the first time he started to teach you, he knew you wouldn't be getting his name right in a while. For Bucky however this was just a minor setback as he felt he had to teach you everything after all as it so happened he was your father.

As soon as you had gotten to the Avengers base they tried to find out if you had any family that had filed a missing child’s report and to know what your name was as you refused to speak (them not knowing you didn’t know how to). Bucky had to promise you that he would be there for every test they did to you to make sure you were as healthy as you could be at that moment for you to let them be near you with any medical devices. As it turned out Hydra had somehow created you from Bucky’s DNA meaning he was listed as the father in the old Htdra records they found at the Hydra base they had attacked. They had also found out that you were around 8-9 years old. There wasn’t a specific date listed anywhere on when your birthday was, only what year you were born. This had shocked all of the heroes as they by the way you looked were way younger. All the more information they gained only made Bucky feel more guilty. Even if he didn’t know about your existence he still felt guilty over the things you had suffered with Hydra. The fact that you looked so much younger made him feel more guilty as it showed how poorly they had taken care of you. If he just looked at you he would assume you were around 5-6 years old and maybe your powers helped your appearance look younger but it still made him feel guilty.

Bucky had to shake himself out of his thoughts as he watched and heard you try to pronounce his name correctly.

“B-b-a-b-a-ck-y” You fumbled over the words as you hugged the Iron Man plushie Tony had given you a few days prior after he saw you holding a Captain America plushie. Ever since you hadn’t let go of the new plushie, much to Bucky’s demise and Tony’s ego.

Your father couldn’t help but to smile at you, it had been a long time since he smiled as much as when you came into his life and he hoped that maybe you could heal the part in himself that he found to be broken.

“not A” he pointed to the letter a in the book you held in front of you “sweetheart, it’s b-u-cky” Bucky pointed at each letter as he said them. He had originally wanted to teach you to call him dad first but as you had no idea what that word meant yet and only ever heard people call him bucky that's what he went with to for now to not make you confused.

“ba-cku?

Bucky chuckled slightly and remade his actions as before. He pointed to each letter as he said them. “b-u-c-k-y, bucky”

“B-u-c-k-y?”

“That's right sweetie, B-u-c-k-y” Steve spoke from beside you as he took the other seat next to you as he brought you a plate with different types of sliced fruit as they were still trying to see what you liked to eat.

You took fruit from the plate and tasted it. Munching on it you smiled slightly up at Bucky. “Bu-cky, Bucky? Bucky”

Both super soldiers let out encouraging smiles as you repeated Bucky’s name as if it was a chant. Bucky’s smile held more pride than the others who had heard you as he ruffled your hair. He smiled more brightly as he watched you stand up and ruffle his own hair mimicking his actions. With that he let out a small laugh and kissed the top of your head as you sat down once more, ready for Bucky to teach you other words.