#character-driven zombie story

[joncronshawauthor]

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[writers-potion]

Vampires, Werewolves, Zombies

They are human, but not quite. Although these entities are deeply embedded in the human psyche, they have not single definite form.

Here are some notes about these paranormal creatures of 'The Universal Unconscious', and ideas about how to tweak them.

Vampires

First stories about vampires as we know them appeared in the 18th C and developed in the early 19th C.

In 1819, a young English doctor wrote The Vampyre, featuring the character Lord Ruthven. An aristocratic fiend, immortal, seductive, and dangerous, he soon became popular.

It inspired Bram Stoker's novel Dracula. Count Dracula then became the archetype from whom most literary vampires evolved.

Sparkling vs. Traditional

Broadly, vampire would fall into 2 types:

Sparkling ones where vampires are more or less benevolent/heroic, less of a monster but a tormented human.

Traditional vampires who are creepy and dangerous.

It doesn't matter which of these you write!

Vampire Tropes

is 'undead' in a state between living and dead

drinks human blood

has an adverse or strange reaction to sunlight

sleeps in a coffin

needs to sleep on native soil, therefore carries some soil with him

remarkably handsome

seductive

pale

low body temperature

has two long retractable fangs

averse to garlic and silver

cannot bear the sight of a crucifix

suffers pain or injury when touched by holy water

cannot enter a home without being invited

can hypnotize humans

can impose his will on humans

not reflect in mirros

can fly

may be a loner or part of a hierarchical society

drains human's life force to replenish its own

immortal (almost)

superhuman strength

can be killed with a wooden stake through the heart

vampires are former humans, "turned" by a bite

when bitten by a vampire, a human weakens, dies, or becomes a vampire.

Werewolves

While wolves are the most common were-humans, humans turning into other animals are also popular.

Werewolf Tropes

normally lives as human, but turn into a wolf with certain triggers

the full moon is a common trigger

superhuman strength

possessive

loyal

dangerous

jealous

organized in hierarchical packs

may be able to change shape at will

lives an ordinary human life and keeps the turning a secret

can be killed with a silver bullet

a bite from a werewolf infects, and the bitten person becomes a werewolf.

immortal

Zombies

Through flesh-hungry undead have been a feature of ancient stories like the epic of Gilgamesh, the zombie as we know it today is rather modern, stemming from George A. Romero's 1968 film Night of the Living Dead.

The word "zombie" stems from the Haiti Vodun tradition, but was not applied widely to flesh-eating undead corpses until the second half of the 20th century.

Zombie Tropes

reanimated corposes

infected as a virus (often in a worldwide pandemic)

mindless, cannot be reasoned with

hunger for human flesh

appetite for brains

craving for salt

relentless, purpose-driven

retains some physical features and personality traits of the person they used to be

sickening smell of rotting flesh

body slowly rots, with parts dropping off

move in hordes

keeps living in this undead state despite injuries that cannot be survived.

besiege human dwellings.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* . ───

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[toaarcan]

What does Mephiles want?

So, Mephiles is my favourite Sonic villain and has been for a while now. His vibes are simply off the charts. But his schemes within schemes are generally considered overly convoluted and nonsensical, and while there's an element of the former, the latter is, in my opinion, an unfair angle.

I know Sonic 06's writing is not the best in general, but I genuinely think Mephiles is one of the best-handled parts of it. So I thought I'd break down why I think he does what he does.

1) Why didn't he just fuse with Iblis in the future/immediately kill Elise to free Iblis in the present/do X more logical and straightforward path to his ultimate goal?

I'm getting this one out of the way slightly out of order because this is another of the many examples of "Audience expects characters to be rational, logical actors who never make emotion-driven decisions."

I can sit here and make theories as to why fusing in the future doesn't work, or argue the toss over whether Elise's death is really a means of releasing Iblis, but the simple answer here is that Mephiles is not a logical actor. He is a spiteful, sadistic monster who could do things the quick and clean way... but he's a time-travelling immortal with power enough to equal the Ultimate Life Form, why not have some fun along the way?

It should also be noted that during the events of Sonic 06, Mephiles has existed as an independent entity for ten years. He spent all ten of those years trapped in a vessel roughly the size of a soda can. Your facetious "Hurr durr why doesn't he just cut onions under Elise's eyes" gotcha can be easily countered by asking "At what point in this man's very short and limited existence would he have learned about the ocular effects of chopping onions?"

2) Mephiles and Shadow: Revenge

Well firstly we need to set aside most of what he does in Shadow's story. Yes, really. The only parts of Shadow's story that are actually part of Mephiles' big plan are the following:

Trying to break or corrupt Shadow in the future.

Acquiring a Chaos Emerald so he can use it to summon the others once Iblis is free.

Shadow actually thwarts that last one, but it doesn't matter, because as we see in the Last Episode, he simply goes and gets another one once he realises that the green and yellow ones are out of play for the moment.

See, Mephiles' attempts to mess with Shadow's head have nothing to do with reforming Solaris. They're a separate, more personal agenda. Because Mephiles isn't single-mindedly focusing on reforming Solaris. He's also out for revenge.

Mephiles' interactions with Shadow are often read as him attempting to corrupt Shadow and turn him over to the dark side, but I'm not sure if that really matters all that much to Mephiles, besides as a means to an end. We see Mephiles really manipulating people in Silver's story, after all, and he has a different approach.

While manipulating Silver, Mephiles presents himself as a benevolent ally, who offers a desperate Silver a means of stopping Iblis once and for all.

Once Silver starts to question him, Mephiles is evasive, not giving Silver a straight answer but instead applying time pressure, reminding him that if he fails in his mission, Iblis' rampage will continue unabated, and implying that time is running out before Sonic triggers the end of the world.

But that's not how he approaches Shadow. Instead, upon meeting Shadow for the first time since he was sealed, Mephiles laughs his mouthless head off, shambles around like a zombie, and promises him "a one-way ticket to oblivion."

I don't think he's trying to get Shadow to join him, guys.

And sure, when Shadow confronts Mephiles in Flame Core, he does extend an offer to Shadow, trying to tempt him to turn on humanity for their future betrayal. He positions the idea of Shadow avenging himself on humanity again as a reasonable thing, as justice.

But when Shadow doesn't bite, he doesn't press it. He just shrugs it off, goes into his crystalline form, and proceeds to start trying to kill Shadow. But why try to make this offer at all?

Easy: This is before Shadow saves Sonic from Silver at Radical Train. If Shadow doesn't intervene, because he's either evil or broken, Silver kills Sonic right there while Elise is watching, helpless in the grip of Eggman's hovercraft, and she probably cries and releases Iblis a few days early.

That's why he switches focus to trying to break Shadow's spirit after this point: Any benefit he could've gotten from corrupting Shadow no longer matters.

Revealing more of Shadow's fate in the future, and everything else he does after this point, isn't about trying to turn Shadow to darkness again. It's about hurting him. That's it. He just wants to hurt Shadow, make him feel like his heroics are futile, because all those ungrateful humans will turn on him in the end anyway, even one of his closest friends will betray him, ordered to hunt down, defeat, and seal Shadow in a prison for a crime he didn't commit.

Past their encounter in Flame Core, this isn't remotely part of the Solaris plan any more, it's purely about Mephiles wanting to torment Shadow, it's revenge for what he does in Aquatic Base in the past. Shadow sealed him in the Sceptre of Darkness ten years ago, and the vast majority of their interactions are Mephiles trying to do exactly what he promised after he escaped.

And that desire for revenge rather neatly explains why he goes about targeting Silver and Elise the way he does too.

3) Mephiles and Silver: For Iblis

Despite his monstrousness, there is someone that Mephiles cares about deeply: Iblis. True, that's technically just another part of himself, but they do exist as separate entities for most of the game, and Mephiles refers to Iblis by name and as a separate entity to himself when Iblis is freed.

And this, combined with his vengefulness, neatly explains why he sends Silver after Sonic.

Because Silver fights Iblis every day. Because when he and Iblis were newly-separated and trying to escape from Aquatic Base, Silver hunted Iblis down and captured him, enabling the Duke to seal him (more on that later). Silver was the instrument of Iblis' sealing, and desperately wants to kill Iblis. What would be more ironic (and we know Mephiles has an appreciation for irony, it's literally in his first line in Shadow's story) than using Silver himself to bring about Iblis' liberation?

How does Mephiles know that Silver is responsible? Time travel, of course. Like, he had to learn where Iblis was sealed, and that crying was the key to the seal on him somehow, he almost certainly hopped back to Aquatic Base to see what went down on Silver's side of things.

That Silver is a good (if desperate) person, but Mephiles is trying to manipulate him into killing another hero only adds to the satisfaction Mephiles would get from watching this all play out.

And though Silver fails, and realises the truth, his interference with Sonic's side of the story only helps push Mephiles closer to his goal, and the third aspect of his vengeance.

4) Mephiles, the Duke, and Elise: Sins of the Father

Let's talk about everyone's favourite Sonic character, Princess Elise III.

Elise is Iblis' vessel, and is incredibly emotionally repressed, having somehow not cried since she was about seven years old, despite both of her parents being dead, the pressures of being a monarch, and the general hormone-driven emotional instability of being a teenager.

As the one thing holding Iblis' rampage back, Elise's death in the crashing Egg Carrier at the end of Sonic and Silver's trip through Kingdom Valley is the point where Iblis broke free and ruined everything. Setting aside whether her death caused it or if she shed a single tear before impact. But this isn't enough for Mephiles, apparently, and despite her being Iblis' vessel, he takes very little interest in her throughout the story... or does he?

Mephiles could take Elise's death as a W, hop over to the crash site and fuse with Iblis there. But he doesn't? Why?

Because he specifically wants to break the seal by making her cry.

This is why Silver's failures play into Mephiles' hands anyway. Because by trying to kill Sonic, Silver keeps opening the doors for Elise to get captured again, forcing Sonic to rush to her aid once more, and generally making their time together much more dramatic and emotionally-tense. This almost certainly helps get Elise, uhhhhh... let's just say attached to Sonic, meaning that when, at the beginning of the final act, Mephiles hits Sonic with the ol' "Nothin personnel kid", Elise's overstressed emotional repression finally fails and she breaks down, releasing Iblis.

But why does he want to do this? Why go through all the extra hurdles of piling more pressure on Elise until she snaps, when he could theoretically just kill her and set Iblis free, or literally just be there for her death?

You guessed it, it's revenge again. But not against Elise, against her father, using Elise as a proxy.

I think if there's anyone in the entire universe that Mephiles outright despises, it's this guy.

The Duke of Soleanna was responsible for the original Solaris Project, during which he attempted to control Solaris' power in order to give himself and his people power over time. However, it's heavily implied that the experiments weren't exactly a pleasant experience for Solaris, given that they ultimately destabilised him, resulting in him being explosively torn into two parts.

This event is the entire reason that Solaris, and his two fragments, are hostile. Before the Solaris Project, Solaris himself was a benevolent and benign entity. As the Flame of Hope, he was genuinely worshipped by the people of Soleanna, and was said to have once saved the city from a great fire, while in the form of an eagle.

Now, it's been theorised that Solaris actually caused that fire, but there's no actual evidence to suggest that beyond association with fire, and engineering a false-flag disaster to force people to worship him generally isn't in-character with what we know of Solaris pre-Project.

That said, their faith wasn't without its darker side, as prophecy foretold that one day, Solaris' wrath would be incurred, manifesting in the forms of the Flames of Disaster. And this is exactly what the Solaris Project ended up doing, driving Solaris berserk and resulting in both of his halves becoming monsters.

So for Mephiles, hatred of Duke, and Elise by proxy, would already be extremely personal. But it doesn't stop there, because the Duke is also the one to seal Iblis within Elise, putting him in the line of fire for the same reasons as Shadow and Silver.

And how better to exact a posthumous vengeance against the Duke than by emotionally breaking his beloved daughter, and in doing so, directly undoing the seal he made, in precisely the way he tried to prevent?

Mephiles' mind was probably made up on how he'd free Iblis from the moment he learned what the key to the lock was.

5) Mephiles' actual goals.

With that in mind, here's my simplified list of what Mephiles wants to achieve in 06.

Re-fuse into Solaris.

Free Iblis by emotionally devastating Elise.

In destroying Elise, achieve vengeance on the Duke by ruining his plans and tormenting his daughter.

Make Silver the one to free Iblis by killing Sonic, an ironic punishment for sealing Iblis to begin with.

Torment Shadow with the terrible future ahead of him as vengeance for sealing him to begin with (Side project).

And hell, here's a flowchart.

It's a bit small, but it should be the right size if you open it in a new tab.

So yeah, I don't think Mephiles' plan is overly convoluted. Most of his actual plan to reunite with Iblis is straightforward enough. Everything other aspect is either a contingency or a side-project, and any inefficiencies are the result of his sadistic need for vengeance on Shadow, Silver, and the Duke.

[ughigottaheadache]

Some prefaces if I ever do post anything about the zombie apocalypse meljayvik au-

There is no magic, no hextech.

As this is a modern au, through child welfare channels, Viktor was able to get earlier treatment for his disease and eventually physical therapy which he was doing regularly until the world went to shit.

So just as a launching point, this Viktor is already a lot more healthy and medically cared for than canon!Viktor.

Just to avoid any confusion when I write this and Viktor is capable of doing more things than he could in canon.

Next up, it wouldn’t be a one character point of view, Mel, Jayce and Vik would each have their own unique character and plot driven arcs. I might toss some POV’s around to fill out space and keep readers engaged, but this story IS about Mel, Jayce and Viktor.

Also, this is still very much a drafting stage, I need point A to B before I can fill in the gaps. Some of the story beats will mirror the events of Arcane, some will be skipped over completely, and there will be new story elements completely original to my fic.

[dragonfly0808]

Please please please make the winx rewrite playlist on Spotify

Mkay so… I got way too invested and wound up making a 5 1/2 hours long way-too-detailed playlist

This is the link:

Veiled Wings and Shattered Panoramas Official Playlist

And if you want to know why I chose each song, down here is the way-too-detailed-explanation of the playlist!

First off; I chose 2 songs to represent each season

Season 1- Wings by PIXY and Faerie Soiree by Melanie Martinez

Season 2- What’s up Danger by Blackway and Black Caviar and Different World by Alan Walker and Sofia Carson

Season 3- This is War by 30 seconds to mars and Nightmares Never End by JT Music and Andrea Storm Kaden

Season 4- Tiller’s Prayer by Sabrina Jordan and Ribs by Lorde

Subsection here for the main song of each arc for s4

Arc 1- Generation Why

Arc 2- The Old Therebefore (the singing to snakes version cause it’s more dramatic)

Arc 3- What Was I Made For? By Billie Eilish

Arc 4- Spinnin by Madison Beer

Season 5 will be… Nightmares Come to Life from HSMTMTS and Long Live by Taylor Swift

Next I chose 2 songs for each member of the Winx

Bloom- Rising by Julia Lester and The Albatross by Taylor Swift

Stella- Sober II (Melodrama) by Lorde and skinny dipping by Sabrina Carpenter

Flora- Envy the Leaves by Madison Beer and Mouth of the Eden by Sabrina Jordan

Musa- Whispers by Halsey and the grudge by Olivia Rodrigo

Tecna- Invisible Chains by Lauren Jauregui and idontwannabeyouanymore by Billie Eilish

Aisha- The Tradition by Halsey and Comfort Crowd by Conan Gray

Subsection for my 3 main songs I associate with the girls:

A World Alone by Lorde

WOKE UP by XG

For Good from Wicked

Continuing with the boys

Sky- Lie by Jimin and In My Blood by Shawn Mendes

Brandon- Something Big by Shawn Mendes and Thumbs by Sabrina Carpenter

Helia- Cough Syrup (the Glee version) and Speak Out (Acoustic) from HSMTMTS

Riven- Boy in the Bubble by Alec Benjamin and BLUE by Billie Eilish (cmon ‘I thought we were the same birds of a feather now i’m ashamed’ is so Driven coded it’s not even funny. And the whole final part from ‘you were born bluer than a butterfly’ is just so perfect for him.)

Timmy- The Other Side and Summer Child by Conan Gray

Nabu- Wool by Flatland Cavalry and Die Alone by FINNEAS

Subsection for my 3 main songs I associate with the boys:

Youth by Shawn Mendes and Khalid

ON by BTS

The Story by Conan Gray

Next, songs for the couples!

Skloom: lovely by Billie Eilish and Khalid, Surrender by Natalie Taylor (and in the future) Maybe this Time by Joshua Basset and Sofia Wylie

Stella and Brandon: There’s no Way by Lauv and Julia Michaels and R.E.M by Ariana Grande

Flora and Helia: Canada by Lauv and Alessia Cara and Venus Sunrise by Lia Marie Johnson

Rivusa: Ain’t No Doubt About It from ZOMBIES 3 (partially as a joke but also cause that song is absolutely so them) Alley Rose by Conan Gray and ESPECIALLY Vermillion by Sabrina Jordan

Tecna and Timmy: Someone You Like by the girl and the dreamcatcher and Tell Em by Sabrina Carpenter

Aisha and Nabu: Tornado Warnings by Sabrina Carpenter and safety net by Ariana Grande and Ty Dolla $ign

Next, songs for different characters and a few couples!

Icy- 28 Reasons by SEULGI

Stormy- The Lighthouse by Halsey

Darcy- Partners in Crime by FINNEAS

Darcy and Riven- Getaway Car by Taylor Swift and Astronomy by Conan Gray

The Trix- Lightning by Little Mix

Daphne- Can’t Catch Me Now

Valtor- Burn the Witch by Shawn James and Castles Crumbling by Taylor Swift and Hayley Williams

Daphne and Valtor- Dynasty by MIIA

Now Roxy’s squad!

Roxy- Control by Halsey and How Villains are Made by Madalen Duke

Shirley- Matilda by Harry Styles

Naten- Kid in Love by Shawn Mendes

Alexa- Follow the White Rabbit by Madison Beer

Chimera- Wandering (Don’t Go) by Hues and Lia Marie Johnson

Chimera and Naten- The Alchemy by Taylor Swift

Roxy and Shirley- On My Way by Sabrina Carpenter and Alan Walker

The Sibling Squad- Grow by Conan Gray and Warriors by Imagine Dragons

Then I put a bunch of songs that just remind me of the Winx or help me get into a writing mood, I’ll just put the title here cause I’m getting tired

Rise

odd eye

run for roses

untouchable

ringo

s-class

thunderous

lion

secret story of the swan

panorama

centuries

voltage

flesh & bone

legends never die

lifts

Finally, I put a song for Selina and what will be the main song for season 6

For Selina: Fall Little Wendy Bird Fall by Lydia the Bard <- this is exactly the vibe future Selina will have for reals

And finally, the main song for s6:

Til Forever Falls Apart by Ashe and FINNEAS

Wow… I def put way too much thought into this.

Anyways, hope u enjoy!

[raeynbowboi]

Playing a Heroic Necromancer in DnD 5e

Necromancy is one of the most evil-skewed powers in just about any fantasy setting. However, unless you're running a villain campaign, most DnD parties are made up of heroes who won't like having an evil character in their midst. You want to play a necromancer, but you also realize that DnD is a very collaborative game. So, how do you make your party more amicable towards the thought of you raising a family? Here's some possible backstory ideas that can fuel a heroic necromancer for your next campaign.

The Scholar

The taboo, illegal, or forbidden nature of studying necromancy drew your interest. Whether you studied with a secret sect, uncovered a grimoire of necromantic magic, or made a deal with a devil for profane knowledge, you were driven by a desire to study magic. The sparse availability of necromancy forces you to remain mobile, making party formation easy. You may be hunted by law enforcement, clerics of Kelemvor, or other necromancers angry at you for stealing their arcane secrets. And now that you know what so many tried to hide from you, it's your choice how to use it.

The Chronicaller

History is written by the victors, the rich, and the powerful. But every life holds valuable knowledge and secrets. Ancient bones know things lost to time. Knowledge that was never written down. Stories which have not been spoken in centuries. Opinions of the common people during a historical event. Experience with phenomenon that can no longer be encountered. The Chronicaller wishes to unearth the secrets of the past already laid to rest.

The Physician

The Frankenstein of Necromancers wishes to understand the medical and scientific elements of life and death itself. To understand the body by inspecting it and digging into it. They may study how to cure diseases or how to spread them. Try to find a way to slow or even halt the slow decomposition that turns the body elderly and frail.

The Thayan Rebel

Once a Red Wizard of Thay, you have left Thay and the Red Wizards, letting your hair grow back slowly as you seek to expand your arcane talents beyond the limitations of Thayan conquest and oppression. The Red Wizards and Szas Tam become personal antagonists for your character and party as a result.

The Undead

Be they a Revenant, a Dhampir, a Vampire, a Lich, or something else, they are already imbued with undead power. They simply embrace their anti-life energy already flowing through them, channeling a power most others would avoid. You may be undead, but you desire to staunchly defend the living from other undead who are less compassionate.

The General

A wizard with a soldier background and optional martial multiclassing, your undead horde is your army of loyal soldiers, putting their lives on the line again and again to serve their general. An Oathbreaker 7/wizard 6 adds your CHA mod to undead within 10 ft, and proficiency bonus to all undead you control. But the steep dip into paladin locks you out from higher level spell slots for stronger undead minions.

The Noble

Similar to the general, the undead serve you out of loyalty, not fear or force. But where the general commands their soldiers, the Noble may command their staff of servants, their commoner citizens, their knights and soldiers, or their own noble ancestors. The Noble utilizes their horde to fulfil the services and duties of their noble house. They're just as likely to conscript skeletons to pave a road or build a bridge as they are to form a wave of zombies to break up a smuggling ring in their city.

The Immortal Guardian

You have or want to become immortal not out of power hunger or greed, but to protect the innocent forever as an unwavering guardian against evil. Everyday people can't protect themselves, and even legendary heroes die eventually. Only an immortal protector can be an eternal defender of the people.

I hope if nothing else, this gave you some ideas for some good and noble necromancers you could bring to your next table. Did I miss any Heroic concepts that you thought of? Let me know, and help make the world a more morbid place.

[maverick-werewolf]

Daily Werewolf Thoughts - Days 17-23

Day 17- So how about this idea that werewolves are unholy? It's a load of bunk, if you ask the old legends. That's right, even in the Early Modern Period as werewolves became associated with satanic magic, the werewolf itself still wasn't unholy - because the werewolf was a victim. And older than that, they simply weren't at all.

Traditionally, werewolves were never considered unholy and, in fact, were often considered associated with God. We see this in the Werewolves of Ossory, among others, and if you believe Thiess or Thies of Kaltenbrun, the Werewolf of Livonia, there were also the Hounds of God who became werewolves and went into Hell to retrieve grain stolen by demons and battle Satan and his witches*. True, he was basically considered a crazy man, but it's a fun concept to discuss. Likewise, werewolves in antiquity were never turned by Satan, as he does not possess such power. God, however, could turn people into werewolves for various reasons (I will discuss this further when I talk about the Werewolves of Ossory, one of my favorite tales). Those who became wolves by a satanic power were also still considered victims, such as Jean Grenier. As printed in records of his trial, preserved by Sabine Baring-Gould (shameless plug: https://www.amazon.com/Book-Werewolves-Superstition-Annotated-Translated-ebook/dp/B0CK4YY16Z )… "The president went on to say that Lycanthropy and Kuanthropy were mere hallucinations, and that the change of shape existed only in the disorganized brain of the insane, consequently it was not a crime which could be punished. The tender age of the boy must be taken into consideration, and the utter neglect of his education and moral development. The court sentenced Grenier to perpetual imprisonment within the walls of a monastery at Bordeaux, where he might be instructed in his Christian and moral obligations; but any attempt to escape would be punished with death."

Werewolves in legend were never driven off or harmed by holy artifacts, holy words, or holy ground - unlike vampires, demons, and other forms of undead, etc. Obviously, popular culture has had them now frequently associated with demonic imagery and acts, but I personally have never liked it, because I love werewolves and I think it's pretty awesome that they actually -weren't- associated with that kind of thing.

There's a (an old, actually) Werewolf Fact on this and more, of course: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-facts/how-to-kill-a-werewolf/

*: It is extremely noteworthy that werewolves were NOT considered witches at any point in antiquity or the Early Modern period. They were different, and the difference remained important including and up to the famous werewolf and witch trials of the 1600s-1800s. I will discuss this some more in future thought posts, as it's extremely important to my research and arguments and how modern scholars have spread so many outright inaccurate concepts as "fact" just to scrounge out more "arguments" for the "academic conversation."

Image: the werewolf from Red Riding Hood (2011), shockingly one of my favorite werewolf movies, despite the werewolf doing the whole "werewolves are unholy" thing. Don't let the teen romance fool you, it's actually really good, and the werewolf is awesome!

Day 18- I am really sick of this concept of "millions of werewolves" like a zombie plague, no puns intended. You see it everywhere these days and have for over a decade, and it's gotten very old. There's a brand spanking new B-movie coming out later this year based on this concept, too.

Back in my day, werewolves came in 1's. One werewolf, one story, very character-driven - made things dramatic and interesting and kept the werewolf horrific, not to mention unique. It also kept the werewolf as a relatable character, which is hugely important for such a story. Today, more often than not, werewolves come not only in "packs" (I will rant about this another time) but also in massive zombie hordes. In such a state, they aren't even dangerous individually. One werewolf isn't even a threat. They're just a plague, like rats. In WoW, you have an objective in the worgen starting zone to "kill 80 worgen" in one go because there's a blue million of them and they all absolutely suck (you have several objectives like this). It's a terrible way to approach werewolves as a concept. At this point, especially with modern zombies being some infectious disease, why isn't the story just about zombies? Why not just make it about some infectious rat-people plague, since that's what it is?

If you see the scary monster in question slaughtered in droves, it lowers your perceived danger level of one as a threat. No matter what occasional thing has managed to arguably pull this off well regardless of seeing dozens on the screen at the same time (I have heard all the Aliens arguments*), it still ultimately works to make the single thing less intimidating. Especially when, in the case of werewolves, they're largely only talked about as dangerous because they might infect someone… you know, like how modern zombies are handled.

Again, I have to say: if the werewolf is just a plague-carrier that comes in hordes, why not go with rats instead? Call them wererats if you must. It'd still be better than using werewolves.

I want to overall be positive in these posts, but often I cannot help myself. I hate the "werewolves as zombies"/"werewolves as rat monsters" trope, and after zombies already stole the "infection by bite" straight from werewolves. Today, it often takes an army of werewolves to do even one small thing. It's just stupid and terrible. Use zombies for your zombie plague and leave werewolves alone.

image: worgen in Gilneas, the worgen starting zone (pre furry redesign)

*: I love Aliens, before you ask

Day 19- One of my all-time favorite werewolf stories is a Breton lai by the wonderful Marie de France. You guessed it: it's Bisclavret, the Lai of the Werewolf. I adore this story.

I relayed the entire story and discussed it in depth in this post here: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-fact-67-the-lai-of-the-werewolf-bisclavret/

But for the sake of brevity (although this will not be incredibly brief), I just want to say again that I adore this story because it's such a classical tale of chivalry, knightly code, and a noble werewolf. I've always enjoyed that although the tale opens with a description of werewolves and what they are/how they are perceived, the werewolf in the story defies this description - and why? Because he's a noble knight (and baron). Even when turned into a beast, he holds true to his chivalry and fealty. But frankly, such a concise description of werewolves is something I really enjoy too-- “a werewolf is a man who suffers a change and runs wild in the darkest wood, horrible to behold, and devours men.” Solid gold. That's a werewolf, right there.

Bisclavret is one of several similar tales of treacherous wives, a theme of more than a few medieval stories, who betray their good husbands. In this case, when she is told the truth of his being a werewolf, she is horrified and hides his clothing so he cannot return to human form. Guess there was a good reason he didn't tell her the truth - but at least he found out she's a terrible person, right? Treat your werewolf knight husband right. I mean, come on.

Similar to the tale of the Werewolves of Ossory, a moral of Bisclavret is not to judge a book by its cover, essentially. Bisclavret behaved noble and true even as a beast, and his king saw this and recognized it, sparing his life. The wife, however, was told the truth of her husband and was disgusted by the idea of him becoming a beast. In the Werewolves of Ossory, we see people who have been turned into wolves by God, and it becomes a test of others as well as the werewolves themselves - for others to recognize that even those beastly in appearance who behave in good nature should be treated in kind. More on this later when I discuss the werewolves of Ossory and the priest who met them.

If you've never read Bisclavret, it's a wonderful story, whether you're reading it for the werewolf or not. I highly recommend it. Someday in the future I'll publish my own collection of old werewolf tales, with my own thoughts and translations etc. throughout… it's on the backburner.

I've almost kept this up for the entire month! I'm so happy people actually read my ramblings. Thanks to you if you've stuck with them.

Day 20- One of the biggest tropes of modern werewolf media when they aren't a rat plague, though sometimes these go hand in hand, is a "werewolf pack" and/or "werewolf family." This insanely popular trope has taken many werewolf stories by storm, although especially the "shifter romance" genre. I confess I have never read a single book in this genre. I wouldn't be ashamed if I did and would admit it, but instead I am confessing I actually have no experience with it, so anything I say can be taken with the biases of someone who's never read one but has heard a gracious plenty through osmosis. They won't be a focus of this discussion, though.

The focus of today's thoughts are the concept of the werewolf pack and/or family. It seems like a fun idea in theory, although I still prefer focus on an individual character and back in my childhood they were called "werewolf clans" and I think that is VASTLY preferable, because a group of werewolves should be insanely frightening. Trouble is, it's almost never done well. I have seen far too many instances of a werewolf requiring a "pack" to even survive (because werewolves suck, apparently?), even to the point of the lore stating a werewolf will outright die if they don't have some werewolf buddies hanging around because that's just how their biology works ("biology" and "werewolf" in the same sentence loses me pretty fast anyway though)…

The concept of werewolves having packs and families that they do or must live in is an extremely modern one, for the record. Back in folklore, werewolves weren't so directly equated with wolves on a biological and behavioral level that they are driven to seek out or live in or create a pack.

I think it could be interesting - and in fact I do plan to tackle the concept myself, in a horror way - it just… usually isn't. Nine times out of ten, for instance, a "werewolf family" is just a bunch of dog jokes bouncing around on trampolines, chasing frisbees, calling each other "pup" and other such terminology, biting at water sprinklers, and barking at the mailman.

There is, as always, a Werewolf Fact for this: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-facts/packs-communities-and-families/

Image - Sketch artwork for Wulfgard of a group of werewolves, by Saber-Scorpion (our setting in which we create a lot of fiction)

Day 21- Remember how werewolves didn't used to be considered "diseased" or insane? All that came about in the Early Modern Period, and actually, it's where we also started using "lycanthropy."

The word "lycanthrope" in itself is derived from Greek "lykos," meaning wolf, and "anthropos," meaning man - which I mentioned before as well. It's why "lycan" doesn't make any actual sense and is just word butchery, etc. But referring to the curse of the werewolf (or disease of the werewolf, in most Early Modern cases) as "lycanthropy" became almost the standard, and it was recognized as an illness of the mind rather than a physical affliction that caused transformation. This is one of the many cases of scientific thought attempting to rationalize older stories and beliefs - which, by the way, also led to a great deal of organized and purposeful wolf slaughter (as in, real wolves, the animals) in this time period, far moreso than existed in the past.

When popular culture took the word "lycanthropy" and ran with it, medical institutions started using a different word to refer to those with "wolf madness," and that's how we have "clinical lycanthropy" today.

There is, as always, a Werewolf Fact for this: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-fact-70-werewolves-in-medical-history-clinical-lycanthropy/

Day 22- I've mentioned the tale of the Werewolves of Ossory a few times now, so it's about time I discuss it. I enjoy this one a lot.

This tale comes from Topographia Hibernica, written by Giraldus Cambrensis (c. 1146-1223), also called Gerald of Wales, a Welsh cleric and chaplain. In the story, a priest is traveling when an enormous wolf stops him along the way. The wolf, speaking, humbly and kindly beseeches the priest to help his companion, displaying all good Christian manners. Though reluctant and frightened, the priest follows the wolf back to his companion, a wolf who is sick. The wolf - "using his claw as a hand" - pulls back the wolf skin of his companion to reveal she is an old lady. The priest assists the old woman werewolf, who then returns to her wolf form.

The werewolves explain they are from the land of Ossory, whose people become werewolves as a form of trial; a man and woman take the form of a wolf once every seven years. Mention is made that they were descendants of an Irish warrior, Laignech Fáelad, ancestor of the kings of Ossory. He was the first of his kind to assume the shape of a wolf and go “wolfing,” and his people followed after him.

The first werewolf says he will watch over the priest and his companions for the night and protect them from danger. In the morning, the werewolves bid them on their way, and the priest leaves. He later relays this tale with a moral: do not judge others by their appearance/form, if they be good and kind.

As always, there is a Werewolf Fact for this, in which you can read passages from the story in detail: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-facts/werewolves-of-ossory/

Day 23- One of the most fun things to a werewolf story is that the werewolf must hide the curse, even from the closest of family and friends. Once everyone else finds out the truth, if they do, it just isn't as interesting anymore.

This goes back to folklore, too, of course - being a werewolf wasn't exactly desirable, so even in the stories where the werewolf reveals it to someone else, the other people generally react with horror and fear. Niceros's Tale, Bisclavret, and many others are examples of this. Sure, there are other examples (like how the king wasn't bothered in Bisclavret because he saw the goodness in the knight's heart and behavior), but generally, it wasn't exactly a good thing. It isn't super uncommon for the werewolf in the old stories to end up badly, same as in the classic werewolf movies where the werewolf was actually scary*.

Storytelling-wise, it's just very fun and interesting. It leads to a lot of character questions, moral questions, and generally dramatic situations. If you were turning into a monster, you wouldn't want anyone to know, either - if you even knew, yourself. More on that part later, though. I just really love stories where the werewolf has to hide the truth from everyone. It's always so good.

*: The werewolf dying is far from a necessity for a scary werewolf, but the werewolf has traditionally died in the things that are conveying them as truly terrifying, even in some things where the werewolf wasn't really all that bad or was even a force for good. I'm talking about all those mountains of films that were ultimately offshoots of The Wolf Man (or, it could be argued, offshoots of The Wolf Man because The Wolf Man was an offshoot of Werewolf of London [1935])… anyway. The werewolf dying has become so predictable I just assume it will happen in most of the type of werewolf media I even theoretically enjoy. Not saying I like it, though.

image: concept art for the werewolf from Morrowind: Bloodmoon, just because I love it

[fictional-orphan-smackdown]

ROBIN VS. ROBIN, GO!

All propaganda and what each competitor is from under the cut

Dick Grayson (DC Comincs)

So a bunch of Robins are orphans or orphan adjacent but Dick has the strongest case in his birth parents, whom he was raised by, being very very dead. The kind of orphanhood that sticks in the characterization marrow. Plus in some versions he was carted off to the orphanage and everything, starting his "what if I fist-fought my parents' killer myself" arc early until Bruce ultimately decided to pluck him off his warpath and adopt him.

Dick Grayson is truly the orphan of all time not only is he the ward of another famous orphan (batman) but he really was able to surpass his mentor after being orphaned and used that anger towards his parents death to immediately start fighting crime under the Robin Moniker. The other orphans in dc wish they could do it like him. Plus his name is Dick which is objectively funny.

Dressing like a stoplight and kicking people in the face under a bat furry's direction was the MORE reasonable coping strategy than his original plan. Of singlehandedly taking down the entire mafia even though he was a baby.

Think Batman had issues? Well, consider what happens is he raises his mini-me. This guy is waaaayy too tactically driven and ambitious for a thirteen-year-old. And awesome. And the adult version is —- somebody append a photo.

Okay I submitted Bruce Wayne but like I can’t not submit my beloved boy as well! Anyway his parents have the nebulous honor of being so fucking dead, like literally never coming back to life ever. They died in that circus and the only time I can possibly think of them as ‘coming back’ in any way is in Darkest Night, where there were zombies everywhere. So even when they return to the story they’re still fucking dead! Anyway Dick is like super orphaned, I love him but you look at him and you know his parents are dead.

Please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please

Trust me bro

Tim Drake (DC Comics)

An early reader-insert character, Tim had all the traits the average comics fan at the time wanted: money, martial arts skills, cool skateboard tricks, lots of girlfriends, secret knowledge about Batman and Robin. He volunteered to be Robin, because what comics fan wouldn't in his place? Continuing to be relatable, he's now bisexual, depressed, and living in a crappy apartment. Which is also a boat, because comics readers think it would be cool to live in a houseboat.

His biological mother, Janet Drake, was murdered in the carribean. In the same attack his biological father was hospitalized for injuries and in a coma. Janey Drake was buried on Christmas Eve. During the period that Jack Drake (his biological father) was in a coma he was temporarily under the care of Bruce Wayne. When Jack got out of the coma he was confined to a wheelchair while he went through physical therapy. He would meet his future second wife, Dana Winters through the physical therapy. The two would get married later, Tim having a good relationship with Dana. Her mediating between the father and son during some of the misunderstandings. Jack would find out that Tim was Robin, then realize Bruce Wayne was Batman, threaten Bruce with a gun, and order Tim to quit being Robin. Though later, Tim would get approval from his father to be Robin again and the two would start improving their father son relationship. During the event of identity crisis Tim's indenture would be at stake and Captian Boomerrang would break into the Drake's house and murder Jack just as Tim arrived. Tim having heard his last words over Comms. His stepmother Dana Winters would be hospitalized in Bludhaven for the mental trauma this inflicted on her, and would soon find herself a victim when Bludhaven was bombed/nuked. Tim would then be adopted by Bruce. Though in 2008 Bruce would be supposedly killed by an Omega Beam, leaving 17 year old Tim as a three times over orphan. Though Tim didn't believe Bruce to actually be dead, but lost in the timestream and would go on a Brucequest to get him back. On this trip he would lose his spleen, and nearly die multiple times.

Doomed by the narrative to become an orphan. Tim had a good thing going for a while, but after he started getting involved with the Bats, his life went downhill from there. He became Robin on the day of his mother's funeral. (I should note that the racism I mentioned in her cause of death is that the person who kills her is an awful racist caricature, NOT that she's canonically a POC.) From there, he spent a while balancing Batman (mentor) and his biological father (who was rendered comatose in the incident that killed his mother, but woke up not long after). Both the Robins that came before him were orphaned. As one Tumblr user put it: while Tim Drake managed to beat the odds and remain not an orphan, eventually, the writers succumbed to the calls of orphanhood. His father dies after he finds out Tim's identity, and it is because he knows the secret that he is ultimately targeted and dies. In the aftermath, Tim attempts to get revenge by assassinating the culprit, but ultimately is unable to betray his personal values and go through with it. He has one of the more realistic parent-child relationships among the Bats because it is down to earth in spite of the eventual doom. Really, it comes down to this: Robin isn't just Batman's sidekick, he's Batman's child. And that meant it was only a matter of. time before Tim Drake was orphaned

[joncronshawauthor]

Listen to Punks Versus Zombies (1-24) - FREE zombie survival audiobook

🎸 Punk’s Not Dead…But The World Is! 🧟‍♂️ Join Tommy’s Thrilling Fight for Survival! 🎤 Brace yourself for an adrenaline-fueled, gore-soaked adventure as Tommy and his punk band battles hordes of undead while on tour! 💀 When a zombie apocalypse strikes, Tommy, Laila, and Micky must navigate a crumbling world fraught with danger at every turn. Can they make it back home to Philly alive? 🌎💥 This…

[heesdreamer]

SILENCED (1)

MASTERLIST

GENRE ➩ enhypen zombie apocalypse au!

SUMMARY ➩ navigating life 1 year post end of the world was already difficult as you avoided rotting corpses with hefty appetites and groups with various bad intentions. things get harder when you run into a group of survivors, 7 boys who make it impossible to run away.

WC ➩ 10.7k

WARNINGS ➩ all things that zombies bring like gore and death lol, sexual content, main character death etc

AUTHORS NOTE ➩ this was originally a one shot story but under request from people that read my stories before i post it’s going to be a multiple part series! hope you enjoy the first installment as it builds up the world and characters plz let me know your thoughts and guesses (NOT PROOFREAD)

Whenever you pictured the apocalypse, the end of the world that people often talked about over drunken hypotheticals or PG-13 level horror, you pictured it loud.

Thunderous even, a deafening mixture of screams and cries behind the roar of fire and destruction.

You imagined utter chaos and it was never quiet in your head when you did so, a clear built scenario that you never paid too much mind to, considering the absolute fantasy of it all.

So now that you were almost a year deep into the official end of humanity, you were a bit thrown off by how different it was from your previous assumptions. Sure, there had been fire and screams and it definitely wasn’t lacking chaos, but most days you found yourself in complete ear ringing silence.

The soundtrack of your day to day life rarely extended past birds chirping, the crunch of leaves and loose sticks under your boots as you attempted your way through forest filled terrain.

It’d taken you a while to leave Seoul, first being held back by fear and panic and then not wanting to leave the comfort of your known surroundings.

It was easy to figure out how to survive there after a while, knowing when it was safe to leave your apartment and scavenge the nearby stores and when it was time to draw the blinds and let’s hoards pass by undetected.

You’d sit with bated breath as you listened to soft groans and bodies bumping against your front door as they mindlessly made their way down the hallway and eventually off to find something that had made a noise or distracted them.

When you imagined the apocalypse before you hadn’t really considered the different types that could occur. You suppose chemical outbreak or maybe even a world war could’ve been possible, far fetched but possible nonetheless. Maybe even multiple waves of natural disasters, wiping out cities and land masses in its wake.

Somehow, the dead rising hadn’t crossed your mind.

The creatures that had lingered outside your door all those months ago weren’t like anything you could’ve possibly dreamed up in your anxious mind, defying science and all rationality with their mere existence and hunger based drive.

It didn’t bother you as much now, having spent weeks frustrated over the mechanics of their mobility, the reasoning for their immortality.

Now you felt somewhat close to them, these days hunger being your main reason for existence and almost your entire train of thought from the moment you woke up to the second you fell asleep. This was the same thing that had finally driven you from the city, the stores running dry eventually and leaving you no choice but to turn to nature for nutrients.

You thought about this comparison now as you came to a slow stop, lowering yourself down into a crouch as you listened to the branches snapping off in the distance.

The knife in your hand felt heavier than normal, eyes darting around the forest as you took in your surroundings and made a quick escape plan in case it was more than one undead, in case you needed to run and run fast. You didn’t want to leave just yet, having followed a deer into the woods a few hours ago and you were in desperate need of an actual meal.

Shifting your weight onto your heels, you listened to the sounds come closer and then stop when they reached a bush a few yards ahead of you.

Your head was cocking in confusion, grip tightening around the leather of your knifes handle as you waited for it to continue its approach. The bush rattled a few times, keeping your attention tightly locked on it as you held your breath.

“Put it down.” A low voice was sounding behind you and you froze, feeling the cold metal pressed against the back of your head before you even registered the fact that somebody was speaking.

It’d been weeks since you’d heard something so real, something so human other than your own voice and you felt a sudden wave of dizziness at the fact you were clearly stuck.

For a brief moment you considered spinning in place and attempting to disarm him, relying on your own swiftness taking him off guard and beating his reactionary speed that would cause him to pull the trigger before you even saw what he looked like.

This plan was put to rest quicker than you could think it through, the bush rattling again as another figured pushed its way through the thick leaves. You watched his face pull into a wince when he saw you and you furrowed your eyebrows.

“Hyung.” He muttered and you heard a sigh from behind you, their plan clearly not entailing this interruption. “She doesn’t have anything on her.”

The one behind you didn’t say anything about this, still not taking his gun off you considering the fact you’d made absolutely no move to lower your own weapon like he had originally instructed you. You remained still despite a wave of fear washing over you at the realization you had nothing of value for them to take other than yourself, a sudden reminder that the apocalypse was scary but being a woman was scarier.

“Go.” He was speaking again, still in that low timbre and the boy from the bush winced again, shaking his head like he wanted to deny the order but also taking an instinctive step forward like he was accustomed to taking them.

You couldn’t get a grasp on their dynamic or what they exactly wanted from you, the boy stood in front of you looked nervous like he had a thin idea of what would happen and he didn’t agree with it. You considered for a second if this was a situation worth trying to talk your way out of, eventually deciding to just let things take their course with your limited options.

“You don’t need to kill her, let’s just leave her here and go back.” He was taking another step forward and he continued to look over your shoulder, eyes only darting down to yours for a second in a silent plea for your cooperation. “She doesn’t know which way we’ll go”

“She was tracking.” The boy behind you was immediately noting and you almost cursed under your breath at the fact he was right. If you wanted to follow them you could, their tracks in the dirt obvious to you now that you’d spent months learning the skill.

“Then we tie her up and leave her, but we don’t need to kill.” He was shaking his head in exasperation and you could hear the boy behind you let out a frustrated sigh.

You had no doubt in your mind that if he was alone he would’ve killed you without a second thought, swift and silent in the way he had approached you from behind and keeping his gun firmly pressed against your skull. Despite your confusion you were silently thankful for the others boys resolve, although it came off as weak to you.

“If you’re going to tie me up in the woods you might as well kill me yourselves.” You were speaking for the first time and both boys reacted immediately.

The one behind you was shifting on his feet to stand firmer, pressing his metal into you while the other in front was giving you a helpless look, clearly upset you had immediately undone any progress he was making for your release.

It was silent for a few moments after that as they looked at each other and you wondered what conclusion they were coming to with just their glances. You hadn’t done yourself any favors in your statement but it was true, leaning you defenseless this close to dark was more of a death sentence than a bullet in your brain.

“We can take her back with us.” The boy from the bush was eventually whispering in a last attempt at keeping you alive, hands coming forward in a plea. “Not as a guest just as a prisoner for now, until we figure out what to do with her.”

You almost laughed at him but decided against it although figuring there was no possible way that would be allowed considering two seconds ago they were about to kill you. However the silence, and lack of immediate rejection, from behind you made you second guess.

You were being pulled to your feet before you even could process him moving again. “You’re explaining it to him, I’m not taking the heat for this.”

His tone was harsh but tired and you were startled at the fact he was actually taking you with, even more fear sinking in as you realized the ‘him’ he was referring to meant they weren’t out here alone. For some reason you hadn’t considered them being with a larger group.

The other boy didn’t say anything but you imagined he gave some form of silent acceptance considering the fact you were suddenly being moved forward harshly with your hands held behind your back.

You hadn’t seen the second boy yet but you were unnerved considering he was able to hold both your wrist together with a single hand, still keeping his gun pressed between your shoulder blades as you moved clumsily through the woods.

From their dynamic you had assumed they were alone, your first mistake, and that he was the leader out of the two of them. Hearing his words about explanation you realized the hierarchy wasn’t that simple and there was clearly somebody they both answered to outside of each other.

“Are your hands okay?” You looked to your left to see the kinder boy following you as you walked, staying at your side with his gun tight in his hands now.

The boy behind you sighed at his question and you weren’t sure exactly how to answer. They were hurting and if you saw any way out of this you would’ve complained, made a sarcastic comment that could potentially get your ass kicked if they weren’t feeling up for jokes at the moment.

Instead you offered him a small nod and turned back to face forward so you didn’t trip.

Your options now were to die here and now, act out and become more of a hinderance than their willing to deal with. Or go along with them and most likely end up being killed eventually anyways, maybe after at least one more night of sleep. You kept your mouth shut for the time being and kept walking.

“We should’ve blindfolded her.” The boy behind you was muttering after an hour or two went by and you vaguely heard the sounds of chatter and fire crackling off in the distance now. “He’s going to lose his shit.”

“Maybe we have Jake talk to him first.” The other one was whispering from beside you as the three of you slowed to a stop, accessing the situation before approaching with a stranger in toe.

It was clear to you now that this group was far larger than you had anticipated. They continued to whisper new names and you listened to the overlapping conversations off in the distance, your heart beating so fast it hurt as you skimmed through the different scenarios this could end in.

While they were distracted you were taking your chance, throwing your shoulder backwards to hit the first boy and taking off in a sprint back the way they had taken you from. You ignored his cry of shock and the others frantic plea for you to stop and come back as you whipped through the trees.

The sun was setting now so any tracking skills you had was completely useless, relying on nothing but your feet and the surrounding terrain as you attempted to put as much distance between you and the others as possible.

You could hear the two who had brought you back with them starting to yell out for help and despite cursing under your breath in frustration, you didn’t blame them and saw it coming before you even ran. You were a stranger and now you knew exactly where they were located, going from a hostage to a threat in seconds.

It had only been 20 minutes of running before you had exhausted yourself from lack of pacing, slamming against a tree and bending over with your elbows to your knees to try and catch your breath.

You could hear shouts in the forest behind you along with groans that brought on the harsh reminder you had more than one enemy in the woods. Their yells and loud feet over leaves and sticks were going to continue to bring more of the dead down on you and you were starting to panic completely.

Before you could think about it anymore or start running again, something heavy was slamming into your side and you were hitting the ground hard.

You flew across the leaves and mud before flipping over onto your back with a shout and scrambling away from whatever had rammed you before you even registered what it was. Another boy, not the one from the bush, was bouncing back to his feet considering he’d also hit the ground after he tackled you and was approaching you swiftly.

He looked furious but you couldn’t tell what type of weapons he had in the dark, kicking you feet out as he gained on you and hitting him in the knee.

A groan fell from his lips and he bent to grab his leg as you pulled yourself off the ground and instinctively reached down towards your thigh for your knife, finding the holster empty and immediately remembering it’d been taken from you hours ago.

He chuckled at your obvious dilemma although it lacked humor, an annoyed expression on his face like you were wasting his time. He was suddenly lunging at you again and although you were fast, he was definitely bigger and you let out a scream as he pinned you back down onto the floor.

Your stomach was pressed tightly against the dirt and you felt his knee land on your back, holding your arms tightly so you couldn’t break free from his hold again.

“Stop fucking moving already.” He was grunting from above you as you continued to thrash and attempt to kick at him despite slowly coming to the realization there was no getting free.

“Hyung.” Another voice was screaming out, obviously following the sounds of your cries and screams to find you. You twisted your head against the dirt to see the boy from the bush approaching you with a few others behind him.

“Sunoo go, you’ve done enough.” Your attacker was spitting from above you and you saw a flash of hurt over the others face, immediately taking a step back towards the rest of the boys who were watching the scene with varying expression.

Sunoo, the one who had brought you here in the first place, was clearly experiencing guilt as he looked down at you but you weren’t sure if it was for you or for causing an issue for his group. One of the boys behind him was reaching a hand up to grab his arm, pulling him backwards softly so he didn’t have to watch.

“Heeseung it wasn’t his fault.” You didn’t recognize the boy who was speaking now, approaching from the side, but you immediately could tell from his low timbre that he was the one who had held you at gunpoint. “I fucked up, we didn’t know what to do.”

“You kill her.” Heeseung was forcing the words out through gritted teeth and you were squirming again underneath his knee, the pain in your back excruciating as you started to find it difficult to breathe. “Or you leave her to the rotters, but under no circumstances do you bring her back to camp.”

Sunoo was glancing at the boy who had said something with a furthering expression of guilt and upset considering the fact those ideas had both been rejected by him. You thought about saying something, about pleading for your life or negotiating a deal where they could bring you far away and leave you somewhere you couldn’t find your way back.

You quickly decided against it considering how serious the boy above you was speaking, also piecing together this was clearly who was in charge and was being discussed in the woods previously.

The others boys were watching in the distance and you were trying to count them to see how outnumbered you were, eventually giving up considering how dark it was and how dizzy you were getting from being pinned against the floor. It was definitely more than you could handle and there was clearly no use in trying to out run them again considering how silently and quickly Heeseung had caught up to you the first time.

You hadn’t even heard him before he came out of the trees and it’d only taken him a second to bounce back onto his feet despite the tackle almost completely knocking the wind out of you.

He had you beat in all aspects and you didn’t feel like poking the bear would be the best move if you wanted to survive the night. That might not be up to either of you however considering the low groans that were starting to fill the forest.

Between the darkness and the almost echoing night air you couldn’t quite tell which direction it was coming from and judging by the way the group of boys starting to look around with their weapons raised, they couldn’t either.

You were being pulled up off the floor before you could think for another second and you sucked in a big breath now that your lungs were no longer restricted, immediately faltering when you were aggressively yanked around as Heeseung started to move towards the boys.

He was flinging you around like a rag doll and you heard him give out a low whistle, the others immediately forming a semi circle defense while everyone started to move in sync through the forest back towards where their camp was. It was a practiced routine and you would’ve been impressed if you weren’t technically their opponent right now.

“Pick your damn feet up.” He was speaking lowly into your ear with irritation and you let out a grunt as he continued to drag you.

“If you gave me a fucking second maybe I could.” You were spitting back and thrashing your torso forward slightly so his grip on your arms would loosen, he didn’t say anything about this and just glared at you as he let you get your balance so you could travel back to the base faster. “Thanks.”

He scoffed but didn’t reply to your sarcastic comment, traveling swiftly in silence on guard in case more than one dead came out from the dark woods.

By the time you got back to the camp, the fires were put out and nobody else was around. You weren’t sure if that’s because it was late or because everybody who lived here was apart of the group trailing behind you.

The camp was mainly made up of tents, some smaller like they were only fit for a pair and some large with big wooden stakes to hold them up. There was a few RV’s you could see from where you were standing and some trucks that could possibly run but for the most part they were large rust buckets littered with blood and dirt residue like the rest of the worlds vehicles.

You were being pulled into the largest tent before you could finish your observation and sat down in a chair furtherest away from the opening. You almost made a comment about them thinking you’d run again but you decided it wasn’t the best idea.

Only two of the boys followed you inside after Heeseung, the one from earlier who had attempted to take the blame off Sunoo and another you didn’t recognize.

“So what’s the plan then?” He was the one who spoke first and you glanced at him from under your messy hair, shifting uncomfortably as Heeseung tied your hands behind the chair tightly.

“First this idiot needs to tell me why he brought her back in the first place.” After he was finished and confident his ties were strong he was circling back around and approaching the familiar one, you couldn’t see his face anymore but his back was tense and straight. “What were you thinking?”

He cocked his head slightly but he didn’t seem deterred or intimidated by Heeseung’s demeanor, only breaking eye contact to spare you a quick glance.

You wondered if he was worried you’d give up the fact it was Sunoo who had practically insisted they bring you back. It was interesting that despite telling him he had to be the one to take the heat originally, he had immediately stepped up for the blame once he realized Heeseung was truly angry.

“She’s a tracker.” He brought his gaze back to the other boy as he spoke calmly. “She would’ve found us if we just left her and I saw no other option.”

The boy you didn’t recognize was looking at you now with a curious expression and you turned your head to look at him for a second, not able to get a good read on what he was thinking or what side of this argument he would be on. You wondered if this was the one mentioned earlier, Jake.

“You should’ve killed her Jay.” He was holding your gaze as he said it and you were taken back by his comment, not expecting him to be so blunt and cold.

Jay, despite being the one to originally put a gun to your head, also looked thrown off by this and faltered in his calm expression for a second and he looked at him. “Are you serious?”

“Jake’s right.” Heeseung shook his head, confirming your previous suspicious and Jay let out a small laugh of disbelief, taking a step away from the two boys back towards the entrance.

“I’m just supposed to blow her brains out right in front of Sunoo, just because there’s a slight chance she’d follow us?” He was holding his hands up in frustration and you shifted uncomfortably in the seat again, causing their heads to turn towards you.

Heeseung was approaching you swiftly and you watched him as he took large steps, gasping when his hand was reaching up to grab a solid chunk of your hair in his tight grip. He pulled slightly to make you look at up him, bending slightly so he could hold eye contact with you.

“How many people are in your group?” He was speaking steadily and low but you could feel the warning in his tone.

You were shaking your head in denial and confusion but stopped when he tightened his grip and repeated himself louder and more agitated. “How many?”

“I don’t have a group, it’s just me.” You were wincing and trying to hold his gaze, failing miserably due to the pain and intensity. Your eyes went over his shoulder to look at Jay and you gave him a desperate look. “Tell him it was just me.”

He didn’t say anything and you didn’t expect him to, only asking out of pure panic and as a last ditch attempt to plead your case. You weren’t afraid to die but if you could help it, it wouldn’t be in some random groups tent just because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Heeseung was loosening his grip on your hair as he looked at you but keeping his hand on the back of your head, a silent warning in case you decided to act out in any sort of way. You watched him with your breath held as you waited for him to say something or react in any sort of way. He was just studying your expression like he was attempting to seek out some trace of a lie on your face.

“You can track.” He was stating suddenly but you took it as a question and nodded repeatedly as best as you could with how close he was to your face. “Can you hunt?”

You were nodding again but slower this time, not quite understanding where this was going. He was looking over his shoulder back at the other boys and Jake gave him an incredulous look that only confused you further before you slightly pieced together what he could he implying.

“You’re not serious.” He was laughing but it was devoid of humor, glancing at Jay who was stony faced as he looked at you. “Heeseung, you can’t be serious right now. Let her stay?”

You felt a wave of sickness pass by as he confirmed what you were thinking and you hoped you didn’t look too appalled visibly. You didn’t like this idea anymore than the thought of them killing you, never being in a group by choice. You didn’t necessarily play well with others and certainly not after they held you hostage and tackled you in the woods.

“She hunts.” He said it like it was obvious and you couldn’t deny the fact it was a valuable asset nowadays as human-made resources slowly died out. You’d noticed it yourself back at your apartment, having to venture out further and further every time you went for a run.

“Riki hunts.” Jake was quickly shutting him down and your interest piqued.

“Riki is learning to hunt but it’s not enough.” Jay was adding into the conversation now, still looking at you as he spoke like he had been since he entered the tent. “It’s almost winter and we can’t keep taking these day long trips every time we’re low…. and we’re always low.”

It was silent for a few moments while they looked at each other in frustration and you once again tried to understand the hierarchy and dynamics at play here, falling short every time. Eventually Jake was scoffing and exiting the tent, slamming the flap down as he left in anger.

Heeseung swiped a hand at Jay, dismissing him too and you didn’t miss the small nod he gave you before turning on his heel and following after the other boy.

That left you and Heeseung alone in the tent and he was taking a step away from you finally, watching you curiously as you took a breath finally and held his gaze tight in yours. You felt a dull ache in your back from his knee and your wrist were screaming for release from your constraints.

“Think of it as a trial.” He was turning away from you for a second as he started to talk and you stared daggers into the back of his head. “I don’t kill you now and in return, you don’t do something stupid.”

You watched him as he started to face you again with a stern look on his face, a hint of youth underneath the hardened exterior, and his eyes shot down to your feet and then back to hold your gaze. “Don’t give me a reason to kill you.”

——

You hadn’t spoken to him again but he didn’t seem too bothered by your silence, only muttering small commands as he dragged you out of the tent and towards one of the RV’s.

You were being left there for the night and you tried not to move much after he cut your restraints with a warning full glance, not wanting him to mistake your movements for another attempt at an escape. Despite not wanting to be there any longer than you had to, your chances were slim out in the woods by yourself.

You figured it wouldn’t hurt to stay a few nights, slipping out whenever you had gained their trust and didn’t need to sleep in a guarded metal bucket.

He’d left you with one of the boys you recognized from earlier in the woods, the one who had gently pulled Sunoo back after he started to get scolded. He looked the opposite of gentle now as he glared at you from the foldable table on the other side of the RV, gun hanging loosely on his lap and he watched you.

“Is there something on my face?” You were eventually muttering, not able to stop yourself as irritation bubbled to the surface.

You hadn’t asked to be brought back here, not even remotely putting yourself in this situation, yet everybody was acting like you were purposely causing issues or trying to harm them.

“You shouldn’t be here.” He was shaking his head and the deep tone of his voice threw you off slightly considering how young he looked.

Despite his youthful features, you could tell he was just as weathered and worn by this new world as everybody else was, you included. His eyebrows were pulled tight and his skin was darker in random sections like he had permanent dirt stains.

He was watching you as you observed him quietly, fidgeting slightly the longer you scanned his features and frame.

He was tall, a lot taller than you and even the other boys you’d encountered long enough to get a good sizing up done. You tried not to focus in on the tears in his clothing or the blood stains surrounding his knees and hands, not wanting to make him more uncomfortable than you already were.

“If you don’t want me here, why not just let me go?” You were shrugging like it was a nonchalant thing to ask, feigning ignorance that he clearly didn’t buy judging by his scoff and annoyed expression.

“And get in trouble for no good reason? Are you stupid or do you think I am?” He was letting his gun lean against the table, deciding you were more of a bother than an actual threat.

You shrugged but didn’t talk to him again for a minute of offer him a response to his question, knowing it would just further upset him. Considering the two of you were clearly stuck with each other for the night you didn’t see the point. “I’m Y/N.”

He was sighing as you spoke again, your voice softer than before as you shifted on the uncomfortable half bed Heeseung had sat you down on. You watched him watch you for a few seconds before he finally responded.

“Riki.”

——

You weren’t sure when you had managed to fall asleep, at some point just laying flat on your back and listening to the sounds of the forest off in the distance as they mixed with Riki’s soft breaths on the other side of the RV.

Apparently you had considering the fact you were being shook awake aggressively, jumping up with a start and reflexively striking the person who had woken you.

“Dude what the fuck.” Jake was standing near your bed and shielding his face from any further assault, a pained look on his face. You gave him an incredulous stare at his reaction, not quite sure how he expected you to react to being vibrated awake by a stranger who had encouraged your death last night. “Make yourself useful.”

He was turning and leaving after that quick statement and you groaned, flopping backwards onto the uncomfortable mattress for a second before kicking up and out of the bed, following him outside before he got too far away and you were lost in the camp.

“You’re going out with Heeseung today.” He was explaining as you jogged to catch up with him, trying to ignore the stares and whispers from the other boys as you passed.

“Does that mean I get my knife back?” You were asking him despite already knowing the answer and he shot you a quick glance at the sound of your voice, looking away as you furrowed your eyebrows.

“First piece of advice, don’t ask stupid questions.” He was stepping forward towards a different tent than last night, holding the flap open with a raised arm until you got the hint and ducked underneath it with a muttered word of thanks. He followed behind you and you saw Heeseung and two other boys sat around the tent, gearing up.

Sunoo was there and he faltered for a second when he saw you, another look of guilt washing over his face as his shoulders tensed. You gave him a small nod but it didn’t seem to appease him in anyway.

The other boy wasn’t looking at you, instead focusing on the disassembled gun in his lap as he meticulously cleaned it and cleared his throat. His hands were fast and swift, no hesitation or question in his expression.

“They’re going on a run too.” Heeseung was speaking and you looked up at him to see who he was talking to, surprised to see him already watching you. “We are heading off in the other direction.”

You were nodding and fidgeting in place, not quite sure how to respond to him in a way that didn’t immediately showcase your frustration. You weren’t thrilled about going out into the world with no weapons and no clue if this guy had good intentions, maybe this was his way of killing you as quietly as possible. He obviously wasn’t expecting you to hunt with your bare hands so you weren’t sure why he was bringing you along.

Still, you didn’t bother arguing with him and after a few more minutes of prep you were following him into one of the trucks off away from the main camp.

“There’s a town about an hour away.” He was muttering eventually as he drove, the heavy rumble of the old engine almost putting you to sleep if it wasn’t for the aggressive way the truck jerked every time he amateurly changed gears. “We cleared it for food but at the time we weren’t thinking about other types of supplies.”

You were watching the side of his face as he spoke and he spared you a glance at your silence. “You think there’s still stuff left now?”

“Possibly but it’s worth a shot. There’s a reason you’re out here and not in Seoul just like us, a lower populated town means maybe less survivors passed by when everything went to shit.” He was sighing as he spoke but seemed hopeful as he tried to convince you.

He wasn’t wrong for the most part, you had traveled to a more rural area in hopes for less of the dead and more towns left undiscovered. You figured if this didn’t end soon then there would be no place left that wasn’t completely cleared out.

Heeseung was large and sturdy but you didn’t miss his sunken in cheeks and darkened eyes, clearly lacking vital nutrients and a healthy lifestyle. It wasn’t that jarring considering you hadn’t met anybody who was doing particularly well but being in a group with larger numbers certainly made things a bit more uneasy.

You took a second to study him as he drove, trailing your gaze from his black long sleeve down to his matching cargo pants. His weapon holster was tightly pulled around his thigh similarly to how yours normally sat and you were suddenly reminded how defenseless you currently were.

“How do you know I’m from Seoul.” You didn’t necessarily feel like talking to him anymore than you had to but if you were going to be stuck with him in charge of your life, maybe some small talk wouldn’t hurt.

“Riki.” He spoke bluntly but it answered your question considering the fact you’d spent most of the night talking to the younger boy after the tension between you had calmed down. “Nice to hear you actually talk occasionally.”

“Maybe I’m more inclined to speak with people who haven’t tried to kill me.” You were quipping back and he let out a small chuckle at your sudden change in tone, not taking any actual offense.

You understood why he had done what he did and he knew you understood but that didn’t mean you were happy about the way things had went down and were continuing to go. You didn’t want to be with them and that much was clear but at some point he had figured if you had somewhere to go, you would’ve put up more of a fight.

The truck jerked particularly hard around another turn onto a dirt road and he swore under his breath, yanking at the shift knob until it slightly smoothed out again.

He gave you an awkward glance out of the side of his eyes and you tried not to chuckle at his terrible manual driving skills. You figured eventually everybody would adapt to things they hadn’t needed to before but it was slightly amusing to know most of the world was desperately trying to adjust to things you’d always had available to you.

You didn’t bother telling Heeseung you could drive a stick shift better than anything else, having been taught in one back in high school. He didn’t need to know how good you were at setting camouflaged rabbit traps or that you weren’t half bad with a bow. Your skill set was better kept a secret until you could get as far away from this group as possible.

By the time you were finally pulling up to a small town, if you could even call it that considering it was just a few old wooden buildings and shops in a U shape, Heeseung seemed to have relaxed a bit.

“We’ll be in and out.” He was carefully instructing as you got out of the car and you nodded although you were feeling frustrated about having no weapon. “Stay close by in case you run into an issue okay?”

Despite your upset and undeniable feeling of vulnerability, the run was going smoothly for the most part. You were quick to enter buildings behind Heeseung as he checked for undead and you had actually managed to get a bag full of supplies that could help the group through the winter.

Your guard was lowering slightly considering you’d come across little corpses, the small town seemingly sheltered from the horror the rest of the world had been subjected to.

Neither of you talked much, the mission being at the front of your minds and you were thankful for the lack of distraction.

It wasn’t until you were on your fourth building, some old auto shop with a connecting garage, that you realized how mistaken you had been. Heeseung was still outside the front door, fidgeting with something old and rusty that you couldn’t quite place.

Whatever it was, he seemed determined to unearthed it from the weeds that had grown around it and you impatiently shoved past him into the store. He offered a small scoff as you pushed through but didn’t bother chasing after you or demanding you wait, also making the mistake of being relaxed.

The second you entered the shop and the door closed behind you, a small gap left open considering the door was also subjected to the growing nature that almost converted the entire building, you smelt it.

Throughout the many months you’d been getting accustomed to the apocalypse and all it’s trials and faults, you still hadn’t adjusted to the overwhelming stench that came along with awaken corpses. It was especially murderous when they moved in masses or were left rotting since the start.

“Heeseung.” You were calling out in a hushed voice, slowing down your steps and looking around the store with confusion. You ignored the fact it was the first time you’d said the boys name and how casually it slipped out, listening in to his small hum of acknowledgment from outside. “Do you smell that?”

You could hear him setting down the metal thing he was obsessing over and pushing the door open swiftly, looking at you with a worried expression.

Before he could speak or confirm your senses, you were hitting the floor with a shriek.

It took you a second to realize why you had fallen but the moment you started to think straight again you could feel the tight bony hand wrapped around your ankle, having dragged you down onto the dust covered floor. You sucked in a sharp breath and scrambled back the best you could, kicking at the walker who had gripped your pant leg.

You could see it now, halfway stuck underneath one of the fallen shelves and desperate in the way it’s jaws snapped around nothing.

You were still kicking it when you realized the groans suddenly starting up were far too loud to be coming from the single walker in front of you, understanding with a wave of panic that your shriek had clearly awaken whatever amount of dead it was that was causing such an odor.

“Fuck.” Heeseung was entering the store swiftly and rushing over to you, immediately stomping the rotted skull of the dead that was holding you with his boot.

Ignoring the amount of blood and brain matter that sprayed out on your face at his action, you accepted his hand and let him pull you up and off the floor.

There was no time to dust yourself off as you both heard crashing and groans coming from the connected auto garage, clearly full of dead that had been starving for far too long. They were pouring out in pairs from the small doorway and you and Heeseung stood frozen as you tried to think of a way out of this.

They were coming from both sides of the aisle, filling up the only exit route back to the open door and sufficiently trapping you in the store.

Your fingers were twitching and reaching down to your empty holster, cursing once you remember you had no weapons on you and turning your head to glare at Heeseung who was already watching you with a panicked expression.

His eyes shot behind your head and you almost jumped out of the way, expecting something dead and hungry behind you, before he was reaching a hand out to grip your arm and pull you with him.

You didn’t object despite your confusion and you followed him swiftly, groaning loudly when you understood he was leading you towards the back of the shop where a small maintenance closet was hidden behind some tool carts and brooms.

“Hurry up, help me.” He was shouting back at you as he started to throw things out of the way and you unfroze, helping him clear the way to the door.

You were spinning around once finished to see the hoard closing in on you, a flustered shout pushing past your lips. “Heeseung.”

“I’m trying.” He groaned, his leg propped up against the wall as he kept trying to pry open the old rusted door with all his weight.

Finally, he was stumbling back in your direction and you grabbed his arm to stop him from falling into the awaiting arms of the dead that were now only a few feet from being able to grab onto you. He was immediately catching his footing and ushering you into the closet before closing it tightly behind the two of you.

You sat with bated breath and you waited to see if it would hold, the bodies of the corpses smacking against it as they clawed and practically shrieked with hunger.

Heeseung was holding the doorknob tightly so it wouldn’t spring back open and although it was dark, flashes of light that managed to break past the dozens of shoes outside the door, revealed to you his fearful expression that didn’t help calm your nerves.

You opened your mouth to speak and ask him about what you were supposed to do but his eyes were shooting to your in a glare, his free hand coming up to cover your mouth as he shushed you.

Your eyes widened at the fact he was suddenly touching you, looking down at the hand over your face and then back up at him as he swiftly ripped it away and shook his head, gesturing to the door like you were stupid for trying to make any noise.

He didn’t look at you again as you furrowed your eyebrows in annoyance but nodded in understanding, realizing he wanted to wait until they had settled before showing any sign of life. They could definitely smell you and had no reason to give up, only driven by hunger, but you figured eventually something would come by and distract them.

Which gave you some hope that you could get out of here safe, not wanting to die stuck in a smelly auto shop closet with Heeseung, but you also let out a small sigh knowing you’d be waiting here for a long time.

For the first time since you’d been rushed inside the small space, you took a second to look around. It was tiny, so small that if Heeseung was standing straight and not bending slightly to keep the door held shut, his shoulder would be touching the other wall.

To make matters worse the opposite width wasn’t any bigger, the toes of your boots smushed against his with no room to scoot backwards or make less contact.

Eventually he was slowly letting go of the metal door knob, moving barely an inch every ten seconds as you both waited to see if they were going to suddenly rip the door open and devour you whole. It was clear after a few minutes that it was sturdy enough to keep you hidden behind it for now, you’re not sure you could say the same about the next few hours however.

Heeseung sucked in a much needed breath and leaned backwards against his side of the closet, his knees pointing out towards you in result.

He was watching you with a curious expression and you glared at him in silence, not sure if you were allowed to talk yet or if it would result in his large hand over your mouth again.

“In and out.” He was whispering it so quietly it almost looked like he mouthed it. You could still barely see him but you could hear the smile in his voice as he joked about your failed plan, the light catching his eyes as he peered down at you. “You good?”

You were nodding but shifting uncomfortably, suddenly remembering how close of a call you’d had now that things were calmed down enough for you to think properly.

“It really had me for a second.” You whispered back to him and shook your head, avoiding his gaze as you looked at the vibrating door. “I shouldn’t have let my guard down like that, it was stupid.”

“Then we’re both stupid.” He was muttering back and you tried not to be too curious why he was being so nice to you despite his harsh leadership within the group. “At least you weren’t alone.”

You were scoffing and shaking your head, his boot scooting forward towards yours in a warning to keep your noises at a low volume. He couldn’t exactly make out your expression considering you were placed lower than him and getting less light on your face but he could practically feel the death stare you were sending his way.

“It’s easier to be alone.” You were countering in a stern tone. “If I’m stupid alone I’m just dead but if I’m stupid in a group then I’m guilty. It’s on my hands.”

“It would’ve been on mine if you’d gotten bit back there.” He was cutting you off and you stopped abruptly, looking at him with parted lips. “But the same thing goes for if I die out here, if I don’t get back to camp, back to my family then that’s on me too. Not trying just because you’re alone isn’t an excuse.”

His tone was heavy now and you felt bad for getting him so frustrated considering how carefree he’d been for most of the day, possibly enjoying not having to direct orders and commands for a few hours. You imagine that if he was able to he would’ve stormed off and left you with his heavy statement.

Instead the two of you sat in the silence of what he had said and listened to the groans only a few inches away from your heads.

You were shifting suddenly and he looked back at you in question when you accidentally bumped against his stomach, not having room to move your arms anywhere.

“Is that why you lead them then?” You tried to keep your voice soft and questioning, not wanting him to mistake you for accusatory.

You didn’t want to fight with him again especially since he had saved your life not too long ago, potentially twice with his quick thinking to get the two of you into the closet.

“It just happened.” He was whispering back and his tone was slightly guarded. “We knew each other before and when.. everything went to shit they came to me one by one.”

“I was scared shitless, I mean sure I’ve chauffeured them around for a few years and I’d handle calling in our takeout orders but now I’m supposed to keep them alive?” He sounded flustered and you listened to him quietly, letting him talk.

For some reason it hadn’t occurred to you to wonder how long they’d known each other. They seemed comfortable and they worked fast and efficiently like they had experience with it but you’d seen similar things in groups who met only at the beginning of all this, being forced to learn how each other works to survive.

You briefly remembered Riki saying something about high school and Jay but you didn’t fully make the connection, maybe you just didn’t want to.

But listening to Heeseung so earnestly talk about the responsibility he carried as the leader and the eldest you felt a wave of understanding, immediately followed by the desire to run far far away from the inevitable care that comes along with a group this tightly knit.

“We left Seoul the first week in Jungwon’s old van.” He was continuing on and when you raised an eyebrow in question he was nodding in realization. “That’s the one who was cleaning the gun, he’s out with Sunoo right now.”

“How many more of you is there?” You hoped he didn’t think you were asking him in an attempt to get information on the group that would assist you in your escape, although you halfway were.

“Just Sunghoon, I don’t think you met him.” He was mumbling and you thought for a second before shaking your head.

That made a total of seven and a wave of fear washed over you at the thought. As of now you were leaving no matter what and as of now they weren’t going to let you just go easy, meaning in some form this was your opponent. Seven men who were capable and seemingly willing to kill you if necessary with the exception of one or two.

Heeseung’s silence made you think he knew what you were thinking and he shifted so he was standing again, no longer leaning against the wall.

This put him even closer to you and you held your breath at the proximity, only letting it out in a moment of shock when his hand was coming up suddenly and touching your face like it had earlier.

You were jumping backwards, at least as far as you could in the tight space and he was shushing you with furrowed eyebrows and a finger to his lips, glancing at the door in worry and then back to you as he continued what he was originally doing.

It took you a few seconds to remember the walker he had stomped on, to remember the blood and rotted skin that had splattered all over you.

Heeseung was gently wiping your face off with his hands, using his sleeves at times for the areas that were particularly covered. You felt your cheeks flush in embarrassment, his large hands stiffening for a second when he realized how awkward this situation was.

He was taking his hands away swiftly and clearing his throat, shuffling backwards again and avoiding looking at you. It was silent for a few minutes and you felt suffocated by it.

“You didn’t lose anybody.” You broke the thick air by speaking again and he flinched before looking down at you. “Since Seoul, did you lose anybody?”

His eyes flashed with something heavy and sad and you imagined he was thinking about his family, slightly curious why he had left without them and what had happened before the other boys showed up alone at his doorstep. Then he was shaking his head to answer your question.

“Then maybe you’re more fit to lead than you thought.”

——

“Was he scared?” Riki’s voice was ringing in your ear again and you groaned softly, leaning back on your pillow and trying your hardest to ignore his constant questions. “I mean, I’ve never seen Heeseung scared. What was it like? Did he cry a little bit?”

After a few more hours had passed in the closet, your suspicion was correct and eventually something passed by that caught a few of the undeads attention. The stragglers had wondered outside the auto shop and the rest immediately followed the noise and movement.

Heeseung and you had waited another half an hour just to be sure before slipping out finally, backs aching from standing straight and rigid for so long.

You’d gotten in the truck with the supplies you found earlier in the day and headed back to the camp, not wanting to risk your luck any further and needing to beat the night as the sun slowly set.

The boys had affectionately greeted the two of you when you arrived, or more so Heeseung as you hovered awkwardly behind and watched them all. You saw a boy you didn’t recognize and figured he was Sunghoon, finally having faces to all the names.

They all carried different expressions of worry and upset and you watched them scan his skin for injuries or scratches, eyes crinkling with relief when they saw he was safe and returned to them. Your heart felt heavy and your stomach turned as you watched the display of care and love towards each other.

You’d caught Jake’s eye for a second and he narrowed his at you, causing you to swiftly give him a nod and slink back into the RV you’d been assigned to.

The same RV that you were now groaning in as you listening to the young boy, the youngest boy as you had found out yesterday, talk your ear off with questions about what it was like to be stuck in a closest with his hyung.

“He cried like a baby.” You were muttering and he laughed softly before shaking his head, able to tell you were lying to him. “I’m serious, my shoulder was soaking wet by the time we got out of there.”

“You know you’re funny when you’re not glaring at me.” He was remarking and you scoffed softly. “The others don’t joke around anymore so I don’t either.”

He sounded younger than he looked when he said it, voice steady like he didn’t even process the weight and sadness of what he was saying. Maybe he’d already started to forget what it was like to be a teenager with no responsibilities.

For a second you zoned out picturing him before the apocalypse, a younger Riki wearing a school uniform and excitedly chatting with the older boys. Maybe he was shy or maybe he was just as talkative and mischievous as he seemed to get the few times you’ve talked to him.

You were abruptly broken out of your daydreams when you heard shouts coming from outside the RV, immediately sitting straight up in the bed and locking eyes with Riki as his widened in fear and concern.

As far as you knew, everybody had turned in for bed. Heeseung didn’t like any one leaving their tents after dark, a heavily suggested curfew seeming to be followed religiously and you couldn’t think of good a reason for the boys to be disobeying this.

You were standing up swiftly and making your way towards the small door, being stopped by a hand wrapped around your arm.

Riki was shaking his head with a panicked expression, pushing you back into the RV. “What are you doing? You can’t go out there.” His voice was urgent and he took a step between you and the door.

His protective expression was making you feel sick and your expression turned stony, moving to push past him but stopping as the door was flung open without either of you touching it.

Sunghoon was stood panting, looking up at you guys from the surface level. He took a step up the RV’s metal steps and glanced behind him with a hard look on his face. Now that the door was open you could hear the shouts louder and also the groans that accompanied them.

“We have to go.” He was rushing out and your mouth parted slightly, looking between him and back to Riki who Sunghoon had been watching since he opened the door.

The younger boy was shaking his head as his shoulders dropped and you felt a wave of upset and guilt for him wash over you, knowing this had been his only home for the past year considering the fact he wasn’t permitted to runs as often as the older boys.

“I’m sorry Rik, there’s too many we don’t have any choice.” Sunghoon was shaking his head sternly but his eyes were soft as he looked at his friend. “You need to pack and we have to go, both of you.”

His eyes moved over to you hesitantly and he lost the affection in his gaze, you didn’t take any offense to it and nodded your head as he turned to rush back to help the others buy some time. You touched the younger boys arm and he jumped slightly before looking down at you with a heavy expression.

“Let’s pack your stuff okay?” You whispered and your unusually gentle tone just made him feel worse, curling in on himself slightly as he nodded and started to grab what little belongings he had scattered around the RV in an attempt to make it feel more like a home.

He was done quickly and you were getting ready to exit the vehicle and join the others when he was grabbing your arm again to stop you.

You almost turned to scold him for wasting time and not letting you go but stopped in your tracks when you realized he was holding a gun out in between your bodies, gesturing for you to take the weapon.

You considered saying no for a few seconds, knowing Heeseung and the other boys wouldn’t be happy with you for accepting and most likely would also scold Riki for giving it to you in the first place. The need to survive overtook this and you took the gun from him, nodding in appreciation.

The second you stepped outside you understood why the only option was to abandon the camp. The dead were pouring in from every side of the forest, their groans mixing together and attracting more and more every minute that passed.

Your eyes were darting around try and spot the other boys but you couldn’t see them in the chaos, feeling frustrated and panicked as you heard Riki’s breathing getting more strained from beside you.

Eventually you spotted Sunoo at the same moment he saw the two of you as well as he was rushing over to you with a serious expression, eyes bouncing around to check if it was safe to stop and talk.

“They’re out past the river.” He was explaining swiftly and you nodded despite having no idea how to get there. It seemed to make sense to the two boys however because they were quickly turning on their heels and disappearing into the woods, looking back a few times to make sure you were following behind them.

Sunoo was running ahead of both of you and your heart clenched watching him take out a few stragglers that were making their way towards the over run camp, his knife effortlessly going into their rotted skulls as he kept rushing through the woods.

Eventually the groans got quieter and you could hear the light splash of a stream, catching sight of the other boys huddled together before the saw you.

“They’re here.” Jake was announcing when he picked his head up and saw the three of you approaching. He stood up and rushed to meet you halfway, checking Sunoo and Riki for injuries before his eyes landed on you.

His gaze trailed down to the gun clenched in your hands and for a second you thought he’d take it from you, demand you leave or maybe try to kill you here and now so they didn’t have another thing to worry about. Instead he took a step closer and briefly scanned over your body, similar to the way he was doing to the others.

“I’m okay.” You breathed out and you weren’t sure why you said it, just wanting to get his concerned look off of your frame as soon as possible. He nodded his head but lingered on your for a second before turning and walking back over to the others.

You followed behind him to see what the boys were surrounding, watching as they all pointed at a crinkled map and spoke in hushed voices. They carried bags on their shoulders and you vaguely noted that Jungwon’s was full of the guns he was always taking such intense care of.

“We’ve been that way man.” Jay was sighing and shaking his head and he pushed Jake’s finger away and moved it further down the map. “From here to here it’s not clear, dead ends or there’s just nothing left.”

“Well we can’t go north.” Sunghoon was countering and you could see a large red X over the area he was referring to. You wonder how long they’d been planning an escape plan with no luck.

You listened to them talk for awhile with a sick feeling in your stomach, wondering if you should help and throw out the idea that was brewing in your mind. On one hand this was your chance to escape considering they had no home to even protect anymore, you could sneak out or hold the gun in your hands to one of their heads until you were far enough away that they wouldn’t follow.

This could be your only opportunity to be back on your own, not owing any sort of debt to a group that was dealing with their own conflict.

Riki was looking back at you suddenly with a worried expression and that thought was immediately out the window as you let out a small sigh, upset at yourself for what you were about to do, before stepping up towards the boys.

“I know a place.” You were rushing out and they all turned to look at you. Heeseung’s eyes were softening at your sudden want to help and you nodded at him. “It’s a few hours south but I stayed there for a few weeks before I kept moving away from that area.”

“You think it’s still there?” Jungwon was asking, his first time speaking to you directly since you’d arrived to their group. His voice wasn’t as harsh as his glare though and he seemed genuinely curious, not suspicious of your motives.

“It was gated.” You shrugged and bent down, bumping into Heeseung’s side and causing him to sway in his crouched position. You were touching the map and felt relieved to see the area you were referring to wasn’t crossed out or circled. “It might not be but it’s worth a shot. Plus we don’t have many options.”

“We?” Heeseung’s voice was soft from beside you and you turned your head to look at him, flushing slightly when you realized how close to each others faces you were.

“Yeah.. we.”

——

[another-goblin]

Random thoughts on Sunday and new Tingyun

Now that they officially teased playable Sunday, I'm worried about something. The game tends to introduce important things about characters to then completely disregard them (I think Blade is the biggest victim of this; I might make a post about it. I mean, currently he's just like a grumpy but harmless socially awkward uncle. He might have been a bit mean to our friend, but it's all in the past, right? Nothing bad worthy of addressing. Not like he was teased as a cosmic-level threat, a spirit of vengeance fueled by pain and madness who subjected DH to decades, if not centuries, of exquisit torture and killed thousands of innocent people).

So Sunday is basically a typical "morally-grey" vilian, doing a very bad thing "for greater good." And let's not forget what he did to Aventurine. He prodded into his past, knowing that it's a very painful topic to him, with no reason basically, just to show that he has an upper hand. And then just doomed him to 17 hours of absolute torture and inavitable death in the end, knowing full well that he isn't responsible for Robin's "death." Again, vilian behavior.

How is the game going to deal with it? My prediction - by completely ignoring it. He's going to be just a normal chill guy who just loves his sister. The story will handwave everything he did off as his mentor's fault or something. I really hope I'm wrong. A character being forced to face and process the bad things they did and achieve character development through it would be a first for this game. But just wait and see them completely neuter one of their most interesting, complex, and morally-grey characters.

BTW, they really have a tendency to remove responsibility from characters. 

Whatever Blade did, it's not his fault because he was driven crazy by mara and Jingliu's torture. But it's not her fault because she was driven crazy by mara and whatever Yingxing and Dan Feng did to Baiheng. But it's not their fault either, because although they kind of still exist enough to create some kind of connection with these past events, it's not enough to bear any responsibility for what their past selves did. A lot of very bad things happened, but nothing is anybody's fault, how convenient. Similarly, what Cocolia did isn't her fault because she was controlled by stellaron. I hope they won't do something like that to Sunday.

Speaking of new characters, not gonna lie, I'm very excited to see new Tingyun (also glad to see a new version of a non-Astral Express character).

I hope she's not some messed-up zombie reanimated by Ruan Mei, but our good old actual Tingyun. But her return to Luofu is going to be awkward. I mean, we had a whole sad little event, everybody saying their heartfelt goodbye to her and stuff, giving her postimous gifts. A bit impolite of her to return alive now. 

But that finally puts an end to the idea that there are stakes and that playable characters can die. After so many fakeouts, it loses its impact; even if they actually kill a character for good one day, nobody will believe it. My prediction: next they'll find a way to make Misha and Gallagher "real boys."

btw isn't it weird how they make very similar characters sometimes? First we have two 5-star young barefoot girls, who are physical destruction and have very similar mechanics. Now two 5-star fire nihility foxians with pink tails.

[fake-married-my-dead-fiance]

My favourite Kdramas (so far)

Currently watching: When the Phone Rings, The Rebel Princess (cdrama), and Vincenzo

My to watch list, Venn Diagram of my favourite kdrama things, favourite male and female actors, my parent trauma tracking, my Truck of Doom tracking, and my Text Posts

My Main is about Jane Austen

For tracking purposes. But feel free to suggest me new Kdramas

Alchemy of Souls: Visually beautiful, wonderful soundtrack, casting is amazing, story is very well thought-out, world-building is on point, loved all of it.

Trope subversions, Love Maps, Plot driven by fear

Moon in the Day: The most angsty enemies to lovers you will ever find in your life. It's completely enthralling. The past scenes with Do-ha are amazing. There are some plot holes and the secondary characters aren't very well developed, but I don't care. It was so good!

Text Posts, On the ending, the emotional journey, Webtoon vs. Drama

Doom at Your Service: The world-building is really well done, as is the symbolism. Doom is so weirdly lovable. Also has a great soundtrack.

Extraordinary You: the story gets a little drawn out in the middle episodes, but the concept is so gripping that I forgive it. The main character is really spunky and fun and the villain is probably the most interesting character in the show.

Lovely Runner: This is one of the cutest dramas I've seen in a while. Top tier cuteness. The story was really fun and I laughed a lot.

Text post, Another, Google Searches

W: Two Worlds: So good! So unpredictable! So Male Lead who was smart and actually acted smart! This is the dark companion of Extraordinary You and I loved every minute.

Happiness: the whole point of zombie horror is that the humans are the real monsters and Happiness delivered on that 100000%. Turns out Park Hyung-sik can also be serious and very good at punching people! Han Hyo-joo was also amazing. The slow burn romance was so cute. Loved it so much. Also, more of a murder mystery than a zombie show.

Zombieland Rules, Webtoon vs. Drama

Sh**ting Stars: the voluntarism in an unnamed African country wasn't great, but the rest of the show was so heartwarming and cute! There were lots of lovable characters, mature relationships, very cute friendships, and hilarious antics.

The Forbidden Marriage: The plot had lots of fun twists and the resolution was satisfying. I wish we got more So Rang hijinks in the later episodes, the hunting episode was my favourite with her running around everywhere like a maniac.

It's Okay to Not be Okay: My only critique is I wish they did more of the animations for fairy tales, but it's so good. The female lead had the most amazing outfits. The story is so good and the way they portrayed the brother's autism.

Revenant: I'm not usually into horror, but this wasn't too scary. It was very well written, the threads in the mystery all came together well. The characters were interesting and the supernatural stuff was cool. Really great acting.

Flower of Evil: Everyone was right again, it was really good. So many twists and turns, such good romance, so many good reveals. Loved it. Loved it enough to forgive the amnesia part.

Cdramas:

The Double: I came for the Very Extra Fan Boy (ML) but I stayed for the really interesting villains. Justice for Princess Wanning! Smart characters who stay smart the whole time my love!

Text posts

Love Between Fairy and Devil: it was as good as everyone said. I really liked the Dragon/Scammer romance, the mains were amazing, and it was a fun fantasy plot. I liked that the two weddings were predicted early but came true in the weirdest possible ways.

Fangs of Fortune: this drama is so fun! Found family demon hunters solving demon murder mysteries with a ton of queer sexual tension and banter. Also, VERY pretty, like the costumes are all works of art and I don't know how they did it. The scenery, the CGI, it's all top notch.

Text posts, Wen Xiao, Zhu Yan

Blossom: Historical rebirth where a wronged woman goes back in time and tries to change the past. I liked that the male lead was almost always about five minutes from regicide or patricide (justifiably). The intelligent female lead stayed smart throughout

My Journey to You: it's enjoyable but it didn't blow me away, I think I like xianxia better than wuxia (which this is if I understand the terms). The Serial Killer Vibes Poison Brother was my favourite.

Kdramas I have liked:

Light Shop - it was pretty and creepy and well-acted, but I was left wanting more depth.

Family by Choice - this drama always felt so calm and happy, even when something terrible was happening, because Noodle Dad was always there to make everyone feel better. A great comfort watch.

The Judge from Hell - very interesting premise and solid execution, Justitia was believable as a demon and I like that she an Da-on met in the middle. The ending kind of dragged and it had some unexplained plot points (like the defeat of Satan)

Text post

Penthouse War in Life (S1 - 3): This is an over-the-top rich people problems revenge drama and it delivers. The writing was surprisingly good, the acting was great, and the costumes were very fun. Seasons 1 & 2 were very cohesive, S3 jumped the shark right away and everything that followed was nonsense, especially the ending. But hey, what a ride!

Twinkling Watermelon: It's good, it just wasn't for me. I enjoyed the female characters more than the main male characters (especially young Yi-chan, he really annoyed me). Eun-gyeol was too unrealistically perfect at everything. But it had nice character development and I shipped all the couples.

Kingdom: Loved it! But I refuse to put it in my top kdramas since S2 ends on a huge cliff hanger and apparently they aren't making any more. Boo to Netflix. This was more gory than Happiness, but I loved having zombies in a historical setting. (This one doesn't go in my terrible ending category because it's just the last ten minutes that suck, not the last one or two episodes)

Ending fix, why the ending sucks

A Shop for Killers: an interesting action drama. I was surprised by one or two of the reveals but they were well written, I liked the non-linear storytelling and Jian as a character. The backstory about Bale got a bit too dark/gory for me but I should have expected that with this genre.

Haechi: Really strong beginning, lots of action, I enjoyed the court drama and the action bits. The only problem was that once the main character stopped being a scrappy underdog, it was just a lot of him winning which got slightly boring. The ending was very pro-monarchy, but from everything I've been able to read in English, this guy was a good king so good for him I guess? Also, the female lead went from interesting to doing nothing with heart eyes.

The Atypical Family: A very interesting superhero/time travel story with a fun ensemble cast. I didn't love any particular character (except I-Na), but the story was really fascinating and I was never bored.

Doctor Slump: Very cute and relaxing watch. The FL's family was really cute, especially her mom! The focus on mental health was nice, though there was a bit too much of an idea that a relationship can fix your depression/PTSD. But still good!

Text post

Daily Dose of Sunshine: this made me cry multiple times. The visuals for how different disorders feel was fascinating. Good resolutions for the characters. I loved it all despite the unrealistic endings.

Extraordinary Attorney Woo: I'm blown away by their portrayal of autism. They don't shy away from making her ticks and mannerisms off-putting, awkward, and even somewhat annoying, but Young-woo has joy, she has imagination, she loves life. It's so much better than anything with an autistic character that I've seen in Western media. Not 10/10 because I did get a bit uninterested in the later cases when I wanted to know where the love story was going.

Choi Su-yeon

Oh My Ghost: I loved this one! Park Bo-young did an amazing job playing an oppressed shaman and possessed-by-a-ghost. It was very well written: there weren't any ridiculous sideplots and I was never bored. I did think the ending dragged a little bit, but overall I loved it.

The King's Affection: I think it probably could have been cut down to 16 episodes instead of 20, but very good. The female crown price is so scared all the time and I want to hug her, but also badass! It's a very hard line to walk but they do it well. Also, the bodyguard who is also an assassin is so hot and the costumes are great.

My Lovely Liar: very cute and occasionally very scary. Probably one of the most normal relationships I've seen in a Kdrama, no destiny or fate just two people who like each other. The murder mystery was well done, though I'm not sure how I feel about the final reveal.

Hospital Playlist: The epitome of slice of life. I enjoyed all the characters, especially Lee Ik-jun, The Ghost, and Long Winter (Jang Gyeo-ul) and the cute kid! I love the mom and the hospital director hanging out together. The band! I cannot stop listening to their songs!

What's Wrong with Secretary Kim: I liked that for once the big trauma didn't come from the parents, what a twist! I actually loved how ridiculously narcissistic the ML was and I loved the competent and mature FL. They didn't have any ridiculous misunderstandings and they never broke up. And the ML's friend was very funny.

King the Land: The show got better as it went on. The female lead was so competent and sure of herself. The parts about the friends' struggles was heartbreaking a lot of the time. I also loved how positive the female relationships were.

Kdramas with Great Beginnings and Terrible Endings (I don't mean sad, I mean they squandered their potential):

No Gain No Love: this drama barrelled through every sexually conservative expectation for Kdramas. They really defeated a bad guy with glow-in-the-dark dildos. Who would have ever imagined? I loved the leads, but the ending was lacking in that Hae-yeong never achieved her career ambitions. The love story was great though and I've rewatched parts of it already.

Text posts

Because This is My First Life: The ending was terrible and gross, but the female characters were so well written and fleshed out that I can almost forgive it. I related so much to all of them. Also, the best explanation ever for why a woman would choose a marriage without love.

Queen of Tears: I loved the set-up but for me it lost it's way at the end. Too many dramatic moments and the Magic Cancer surgery and Magic Amnesia Month were just too much of a strain on my ability to suspend my disbelief. But the performances were very good, from the leads and the secondary characters, and the premise was good. I enjoyed like 80% of the show.

Text posts

Captivating the King: I'm struggling to rate this one. The ML was amazing, but the FL seemed to just always be wide-eyed scared/worried. The writing was great for the first half, but the ending was ambiguous in a way I didn't enjoy. The intimate scene in Ep 8/9 was awesome, but then we didn't really get more. I wish they had stuck the landing. Smart character became dumb.

Marry My Husband: very fun drama, I especially enjoyed Su-min and Min-hwan, who were some of the most deep villains I've seen portrayed. However, I hated the Yu-ra storyline and I felt like the ML kept the secret of his death for way too long. Also, no happy ending for the secondary couples! I wanted more screen time with them.

Webtoon vs. Drama, Text Post

The Story of Park's Marriage Contract: It was fluffy and fun, I loved Sa-wol the maid, we should have had more of her! I hated the ending though, so much. Just so bad.

Kdramas that are So Bad They Are Somehow Good:

Perfect Marriage Revenge - This show did exactly what it set out to do, be completely over-the-top dramatic. The male lead looks like a Ken doll dressed by an eight year old, the mothers have the most over the top outfits and hairstyles ever, someone eats DNA test results, it's a delight to watch.

Hwarang: really great acting despite a mediocre script, but man so many plot holes and unresolved plots. I never totally decided if the Queen Dowager was actually trying to help her son or just holding on to power and I feel like they should have made that clearer. Also, what was that love triangle??? But I did enjoy myself the whole time.

Dreaming of a Freaking Fairytale: the acting was good enough that except for the first episode, I enjoyed myself the whole time. Also so many good kissing scenes! Fun subversion of the Cinderella trope.

Other Kdramas I've watched:

Cinderella at 2am: It was cute, but I ended up liking the second couple more and I wish they'd had more screen time. I don't think the male lead is a very good actor either.

Perfect Family: the story was engaging enough but it had such a weird ending. Like not dissatisfying, but just strange? Also, my favourite actor was dead basically the whole time, which I knew going in but it still made me sad.

The Red Sleeve: full review here and also here, but basically, I loved the Crown Prince's story, but the female lead fell flat. They never sufficiently explained the FL's emotional journey and they also kept ruining female characters. Justice for the Queen Dowager!

Soundtrack #1: I hate endless, hopeless pining and that's all this was. It had it's cute moments, but I always felt like the male lead was in pain and I didn't enjoy that.

Hospital Playlist 2: Somehow it wasn't as good as the first season, I found myself actually getting bored. But it was nice to see all the couples get together.

Goblin/Guardian the Great and Lonely God: The roommate stuff is hilarious! It did move slowly at times, I wanted the Grim Reaper/Sunny stuff to move faster. I got really annoyed at Kim Shin for not being honest with Eun-tak. Sometimes the product placement annoyed me. But it's very beautiful and I was very invested in everyone. Problem is, I don't think I ever want to watch it again.

Tale of the Nine Tailed + 1938 - It's fun, but the lore/world-building don't make a whole lot of sense. The Serpent is pretty over powered in S1 and really ought to have won. 1938 was better but the female mountain goddess made zero sense as a character. Lee Rang is probably the best part of the whole series, and his little murder fox girl in S1 or mermaid girl in S2.

Castaway Diva: I love the songs and the found family parts, but the story was lacking. Especially the older singer's story made very little sense and didn't come to a satisfying conclusion. And why not show us a little of the main couple being together?

Hotel del Luna - I enjoyed the ghost parts but the dynamic between the main couple was a mess. He is so unconditionally nice and she is such a jerk to him!

Strong Girl Bong-Soon - I loved all the parts with Bong-Soon and Min-hyuk, like he was the cutest, sweetest boy ever, but everything else was kind of annoying. And the kidnapper parts were really creepy! I just wanted Bong-Soon to smash more things. I also hated Guk-doo and I wanted all the women to dump his ass.

Business Proposal - It was cute, but it bothered me that Ha-ri wouldn't just talk to Tae-moo about her concerns about dating him. Ha-ri may be the only female lead ever with a healthy family dynamic, yay for her! The secondary couple was fun.

Death's Game - I enjoyed the genre and actor switches at first, but then it seemed to veer into being about the serial killer CEO and then back to being about suicide and the resolution left me unsatisfied.

Webtoon vs. Drama

My Demon - It was fun, but the world-building wasn't great and the ending was fine. I felt like it tried to be Doom at Your Service but failed (there were many, many references/thefts).

Destined with You - I really liked some parts of it, especially the leads and I actually liked the office romance with Hong-jo's boss (until the last episode), but they left so many things unanswered that I wish were revealed! It's like the writers forgot it was a fantasy drama halfway through and just went in a totally different direction. It makes me angry.

The Uncanny Counter - The concept was good, the actors were good, the chemistry between the actors was amazing, but the story went way off the rails. So Mun just became way too over-powered and the plot needed more balance. I wanted more demon catching and less mayor stuff. I did like the bully being saved and reformed.

100 Days My Prince - I hated the main couple, he was just too distant and she should have figured out who he was like 10 minutes in. It felt like they only got together because he was obsessed with her, I would have preferred the nice face-blind guy. I ended up liking the peasant friend couple and the murderous princess and her assassin boyfriend better.

Started but not finished:

Hometown Cha Cha Cha - I hated it. Dropped at 9/16. Review. Frustration. Moving - I started it, it seems really slow. I think I'm four or five episodes in. The Crowned Clown - First episode was way too dark! Live Up To Your Name - Acupuncture is magic? Moonlight Drawn by Clouds - the first episode seemed bonkers Strong Girl Nam-Soon - could not even force myself to watch it. Total mess The Impossible Heir - Even Lee Jae-wook couldn't save this messy plot. My Sweet Mobster - stopped watching at Ep 10, I couldn't handle the jealousy and I found the FL really boring. River Where the Moon Rises - the pacing is bad (always seems like they are running around) and for some reason I cannot with the ML's super white teeth in the year 500 A.D. Ep 11/20 Our Blooming Youth - it has it's moments, but it started out creepy and most of the time is just silly. I do want to know how the mystery unravels but not enough to care right now 12/20 Fated to Love You (You are My Destiny) - I really liked the first episodes but after the miscarriage, it just seems like unnecessary delay of getting them back together. 14/20

[asoiaf-source]

GRRM wanted to subvert the usual tropes

Remember GRRM started out his series with the intention of writing something that didn't follow the typical tropes and conventions of previous works. GRRM wanted to subvert the usual tropes like the secret hidden 'prince who was promised' perhaps by having that person be illegitimate - Jon fulfills some prophecy by blood, but not through a legal marriage, he is the 'hero' but not the true 'king' at least by rights of succession.

GRRM will not pull a book out of a dark ancient library that gives us all the answers to the past that make everything easy for our characters, or have a weird political marriage between 'siblings / cousins' be what is needed to unite a kingdom (how? everything is fractured, the land decimated, why would the people care about a political marriages in the aftermath of a zombie apocalypse?)

Remember GRRM promised or forewarned a bittersweet ending, not all the mains or favorites will survive or have a typical happy ending, and I'm assuming that is especially true for the tortured and much suffering 'hero' - at least that is my gut feeling. To me the two most prominent characters Tyrion and Jon are also the two most likely to die by the end - at least one if not both, driven there by circumstances: blinded by love, rage, or perhaps a noble sacrifice.

Tyrion is already blinded by his hatred and rage, will his better nature win out or will he continue to feed his hatred until his end? GRRM had Jon suffer 'death' and gave us clues that resurrections can happen, but they also alter a person, no matter how Jon manages to remain intact after resurrection, he will not come back the same, there will be notable changes, otherwise why do it in the first place? (the show did this very poorly!)

If they survive they will be much altered, as in not the most well adjusted people, lots of trauma to deal with, to take on the role of the clear-sighted leader needed to rebuild a nation and inspire/lead its people. They maybe able to help and/or advise, but I don't see them as the main leader on top. Both have really been through the most changes physically and mentally and you know it will only get harder and worse by the end, GRRM isn't don't with them yet.

As much as the Stark kids have suffered, I still get a feeling of hope and sense of future with them, they are working hard for some kind of future in mind, they are young and being tested and learning how to be resilient people. They don't know of the larger dealing happening in the world yet, only bits and pieces, but it does feel like GRRM is preparing them to deal with it when their time comes and they finally have full agency to do something. Not sure all will work out, but I just can't see any of them dying or coming to harm by the end of the series. I don't feel any of them have had 'big' player moments yet, so I find it harder to sense a future for them beyond what others speculate on and most of it feels wishful.

As for Dany, she started out subjugated, but quickly found her power and has exerted that power within the story. She is by far the most powerful POV in terms of making changes in the world with large consequences. She means well, but things do not always go well or as she expected. She is learning, but also doing at the same time which makes the outcomes all the more complicated as it affects so many people, and not all of it is welcome change. Dany brings hope, but she also bring chaos, Dany makes friends, but she also makes lots of enemies...

I go back and forth on Dany's ending, mainly because of GRRM trope subversions and with Dany it could go either way. GRRM is building her up for something good and great, but whether she survives or is acknowledged for it? That would be bitter sweet indeed, but also in character for her - well meaning and doing something for the greater good, but often misunderstood or politically attacked by her enemies so that only a few close to her know of her true noble intentions and sacrifices. I want her to live, but I could also see her dying or being killed. She is a symbol and and icon and that is an attractive target for people like Varys or even Cottington, could go either way... I just acknowledge the possibilities.

[tobiasdrake]

Do you think Dragon Ball would be better if it was less obsessed with every new villain being so much stronger than the last?

Better? That depends. Dragon Ball's emphasis on each mountain being higher than the last works for the story of Son Goku, which Dragon Ball is.

In any given story, the villain drives the plot but the hero sets its tone. Goku's tone is one of personal growth, the constant desire for self-improvement, and to never stop developing your abilities. Consequently, the plots his villains drive need to match that tone by creating obstacles suitable for Goku's story.

This is the problem that derailed Gohan's ascension to protagonist, as Dragon Ball continued to try and tell Gohan's story by creating a villain suitable for Goku's. It didn't know how to change direction and let Gohan set the tone instead, and instead kept going with Goku's.

Gohan could be a fantastic protagonist in a story driven by Gohan's tone. But he's not very good at being Goku. There's only one character who's good at being Goku, and that's Goku.

Which creates further problems into Super, because Goku's story kinda. Already. Ended satisfactorily. Like, it reached an organic conclusion, and has now become something of a zombie trying to keep doing the things that Goku's story did in the past at the expense of both other characters and Goku himself, who has no further story left in him to tell.

Goku's story worked for Goku but that story is over. Meanwhile, there are a wealth of other stories that could be told in the Dragon Ball universe. Those, however, would be stories best told through the lens of their protagonists, and not through Goku's.

[maesfics]

𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑑 '𝑒𝑚 . . . ᥫ᭡

OUTER BANKS.

↬ jj maybank. from the nextflix series "Outer Banks," is a charismatic and impulsive troublemaker with a heart of gold.

↬ rafe cameron. from netflix series "Outer Banks," is a troubled and unpredictable rich kid grappling with deep-seated issues and a desire for approval.

SEVENTEEN.

↬ boo seungkwan. better known as Seungkwan from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is celebrated for his powerful vocals and dynamic stage presence. His quick wit and humor make him a standout personality both on and off stage.

↬ lee seokmin. better known as DK from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is a talented singer with a bright personality and a heartwarming smile.

↬ hong jisoo. better known as Joshua from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is a gentle and soft-spoken singer with a serene presence and a knack for songwriting.

↬ kim mingyu. from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN is a charismatic and visually striking member, known for his model-like appearance and easygoing, friendly demeanor.

↬ choi seungcheol. better known as s.scoups, the leader of K-pop group SEVENTEEN, is known for his strong leadership, deep voice, and caring nature, often acting as a supportive pillar for the group.

↬ yoon jeonghan. from the K-pop group SEVENTEEN is known for his angelic visuals, playful personality, and soothing vocals that add a unique charm to the group's dynamic.

↬ xu minghao. known as the8 in the K-pop group SEVENTEEN, brings a unique blend of martial arts-inspired dance moves and a soft, ethereal vocal style. His artistic sensibilities and fashion-forward image add a distinct flavor to the group's performances

THE LAST OF US (VIDEO GAME).

↬ abby anderson. from the video game "The Last of Us Part II," is a fiercely determined and physically strong character, driven by a deep sense of loyalty and a quest for revenge.

↬ dina woodward. from the video game "The Last of Us Part II," is a brave and compassionate survivor, known for her witty sense of humor and supportive nature.

↬ ellie williams. from the video game "The Last of Us I & II," is a resilient and complex character, marked by her toughness and emotional depth in a post-apocalyptic world.

ALL OF US ARE DEAD.

↬ lee su-hyeok. from "All of Us Are Dead," is a resourceful and athletic high school student, known for his bravery and quick thinking during the zombie crisis.

↬ choi nam-ra. a character from "All of Us Are Dead," is depicted as a mysterious and intelligent student, who harbors a secret strength amidst the chaos of a zombie outbreak.

↬ lee cheong-san. from the series "All of Us Are Dead," is portrayed as a brave and selfless high school student, who emerges as a protective figure during a zombie apocalypse.

XO KITTY.

↬ minho. from the series "XO, Kitty," is a charming and thoughtful character, known for his kind heart and the sweet, supportive role he plays in the story.

TRUE BEAUTY.

↬ lee suho. from the series "True Beauty," is a handsome and aloof high school student who harbors deep emotional scars beneath his perfect exterior.

↬ han seojun. from "True Beauty," is a charismatic and tough-looking character with a warm heart and a hidden passion for music.

masterlist will be updated frequently.

[intersexbookclub]

Book review: Cattywampus

Our pick for July 2024 was Cattywampus, a children’s novel featuring a main character with AIS. The story focuses on two young witches, Katybird (intersex) and Delpha (perisex) as they come of age and develop their magic powers. Katybird being intersex is relevant to the plot as the magic system in the book has a gendered component.

Overall impressions:

Elizabeth: it was a fun little adventure that handled the AIS part very well. I was underwhelmed about it turning into a zombie story, but I still enjoyed the book and felt it advanced intersex representation.

Bnuuy: I thought it was pretty good, could imagine myself reading and liking it when young. It was a fast read and I think it would be a great book for school libraries.

Emily: I didn’t finish it, but middle grades aren’t my cup of tea. But I think I also would have liked it if I’d read it when I was that age. 

Michelle: the AIS felt a little shoehorned in terms of terminology, but lots of great casual representation. Very charming, loved the dialect and representation particularly. The class and socioeconomic issues were depicted particularly well. Great, strong characters.

Remy: I liked how much more chill this book was about AIS compared to Across the Green Grass Fields! It also has me thinking about two other stories. Demon Copperhead by Barbara kingsolver for Appalachian rep, and Muted (a webtoons comic), about magic families that magic also gets passed down matriarchally.

The intersex representation

Emily found it jarring that there was medical jargon in a book whose tone tries to be very folksy, and Michelle agreed that it stuck out. However, Elizabeth felt the language is realistic: people who are diagnosed young often understand ourselves through medicalized language at that age. 

We talked about how the book had to explain so much about intersex because of how little the general public knows, and it would be nice if not so much exposition is necessary - but we all understood the need for it.

Elizabeth liked how the book teaches people that intersex (and disabled) people do not generally want pity. The book highlights how Katybird was uncomfortable with people at school praying for her, how it was unwanted and actually hurt her. 

Bnuuy liked how the book included intersex representation in a way that mattered to the story, but it wasn’t a book specifically about being intersex. The intersex themes integrated well with the other themes (coming of age, disability, etc). 

Bnuuy pointed out out that when Katy gets control of her magic, she is identifying with poison ivy. Other books we’ve read in this book club have drawn a connection between being intersex and plants, and it was neat to see that theme emerge here!

Remy liked how Katy was more chill about having AIS than the character Regan from Across the Green Grass Fields. Cattywampus was just a whole lot more chill about AIS. Bnuuy pointed out that it was unusual how chill Katy’s family was about her having AIS, but that it’s important for children who are intersex to have this frame of reference of how they should be treated.

Elizabeth added that it’s also a good example for parents. The book mentions how Katy’s mom was described as doing her own research on AIS and speaking to people from intersex organizations at length before telling doctors: “no surgery for my child”. 

Early in the book, Katy remembers going to a “moon party” where girls were talking about their first period stories. Katy casually shared that doesn’t happen for her, not seeing anything wrong with it. And it became a negative experience because of how the others reacted with horror and pity. Elizabeth could relate - not to this specific experience but to the sort of experiential disconnect.

What else we liked

The plot is driven by a spell which goes wrong, and Remy liked that the solution to the spell problem was not “try harder” as that is a common trope in stories where magic is tied to emotions.

Bnuuy liked how Katy’s family and Delpha’s family had different approaches to deal with the social ban on doing magic in public. Katy’s family did magic in secret, whereas Delpha’s mother had a policy of “we never do magic”. Both characters felt shame about their magical abilities: Katy faces deep anxiety about her magic puberty powers awakening not happening the way it is "supposed" to, whereas Delpha feels shame for wanting to use the powers at all. While Delpha’s mother meant well, the total ban on magic created stigma for Delpha that actively contributed to her not asking for help.

Elizabeth appreciated how the book reminded zer the extent to which children do what they think adults want them to do. A reason the main characters’ problems escalated was every time they tried to ask for help from adults, the adults implied they didn’t want the kids doing magic, and so the girls each lied and told the adults what they thought the adults wanted to hear.

Bnuuy liked how the preacher’s wife was actually cool with magic/difference and a useful ally to the kids - nice to see a positive Christian representation. Bnuuy also liked how the geographic location felt connected to the spell that the preacher’s wife helped the kids with.

Bnuuy pointed out the Deaf representation was also good. We all liked seeing an example of a family putting in the effort to learn ASL for their Deaf child. (We then wound up on a tangent about Plains Indian Sign Language, the lingua franca of most of North America before European hegemony.)

What we struggled with

Elizabeth felt uneasy about how the Appalachian history was presented as “a bunch of Celtic people were here for hundreds of years” and wanted the bare minimum of acknowledgement that this is Native land and these families were not the only people in the area who had roots there. Ze didn’t feel a Native character was necessary, just that the depiction of the regional history included the relevant Nation(s) for the setting (Muscogee? Cherokee? Shawnee?). 

Remy was concerned the (audio)book presented a classist/racist depiction of Appalachian people in the audiobook. The author of the book is from Appalachia, so most of us are inclined to believe this is done with sensitivity. Most of us are not from (or live in) the USA, and most folks felt unable to assess this. Elizabeth found some of the dialectal choices to be confusing, but accepted that ze was not necessarily the audience and there is value in books featuring dialects/registers other than Standard English.

The character Delpha starts the book without a father in her life, and yearns for one. Michelle was disappointed that Delpha’s biological dad came back. Xe had hoped that the Dad character would be a father figure, and she’d build a new family. Xe felt it would be more productive to have a positive representation of healthy step-parents and/or non-nuclear families than how the book instead resolved Delpha’s desire for a father by having her biological father return.

We all agreed that it was weird that Katy’s 6-year-old Deaf brother was so comfortable with an unplanned sleep over at a new house with an adult that they seemed only vaguely acquainted with. 

Mixed reactions

Remy felt the small town attempt didn’t land: everyone knows everyone but they’re also big enough for tourists? Elizabeth has spent time in small towns that are tourist destinations so that felt plausible to zem. The actual geography of the area was confusing for a lot of us, and how long it took for various characters to arrive at different destinations. A map would have probably helped a lot.

Michelle would have liked Katy and Delpha to couple up because they had good chemistry, and would add to the queer rep. Elizabeth disagreed, and personally wants less romance and coupling in children’s literature - feels like there’s already too much cultural pressure for kids to form romantic bonds.

The maturity of the characters prompted mixed thoughts. Remy brought up a feeling that the main characters didn’t act like they were 12. We talked about how maturity in kids isn’t so much a consistent thing: development doesn’t mean somebody is always “acting 12” but might act like they’re 6 at one thing and act 14 at another. It’s a challenge for writers to pull off realistic children.

Elizabeth had mixed feelings about how neither family had done basic magic safety training, which seemed like a kind of obvious thing to have done. But the plot required that to not happen, so was resigned that it was a suspension of disbelief thing. Elizabeth was confused that the kids didn’t go to the preacher’s wife for more help after she was established as a trustworthy adult.

Delpha is revealed to be part Yow. Remy hoped that the Yow thing isn’t a male-specific thing, and was concerned this would undermine the intersex rep.

What we would want in a sequel

Bnuuy posed a fun and constructive question: what would we want to see in a sequel? 

Remy would like a character who is both Yow and Witch

Elizabeth wants to see if Delpha’s mother has had character development

Bnuuy suggested one or more Native characters

Remy suggested a third magic family that finds it odd that Katy’s family and Delpha’s family have a gendered pattern to who is magical. 

Elizabeth thinks it would be fun if it turns out all genders had magic ability and just nobody thought to train the men. Remy added: “ooh yes and they just repressed it with their feelings!”

Michelle pointed out there was already a hint of that in the text. Bnuuy pointed out the possibility that the magic maybe wasn’t genetic so much as the sharing of knowledge and training, and this aspect of how it works just got lost over the generations.

Remy would like adopted character(s) who can do magic.

Overall, this was a fun romp suitable for the middle grade (age 8-12) audience that may be enjoyable for folks of older ages. The book handles the AIS representation in a way that is productive and educational while also feeling integrated with the plot. We’d definitely recommend this one for parents reading to their kids!