#chai is literally the only thing keeping me going

[i-want-to-be-spaghettified]

chai is my comfort drink

[ramons-elevator]

*SLAMS HANDS ON DESK*

FUCKING PHILS POV

Everything about his POV was bone chilling holy shit. Also fucking shoutout to the admins for picking Chayanne and Tallulah bc that was a really smart move.

For some context for those who arent Philza watchers:

Tallulah and Chayanne obey Phil. Yes they can be divas sometimes and be dumb and silly, but they arent like their siblings like Dapper and Richas who will just be dramatic and do dumb and dangerous stuff when their parents dont feel 100% okay with it. They will throw a fit but still be respectful of Phil’s word.

Phil said multiple times to them, especially Tallulah, to not go to the dinner no matter what. That as soon as it hits 2pm PST, they get tucked into bed and they can wake up after if they want. Chay and Lullah both agreed bc they both fear dying. Tallulah wants to see her dad and Chayanne knows how hard his dad works to make sure they are safe.

Let me fucking tell you how creepy it was seeing Tallulah walk into the dinner.

Phil immediately questioned her and was like “what the fuck you doing? We both agreed you would stay in bed.” and when ‘Tallulah’ just stared at him and shook her maracas, you could feel the air still.

Personally, it felt like a bucket of ice water got dumped on me. Phil literally froze. Because thats not fucking Tallulah. Tallulah is calculated, gentle, and slow moving. The ‘Tallulah’ at the dinner was shaking her maracas without a care in the world, running around. Also Tallulah will talk to Phil and they check in on each other. The ‘Tallulah’ at the dinner didnt put down a sign once.

Then as Phil was realizing that Tallulah wasn’t Tallulah, then ‘Chayanne’ comes in. At this point Phil realized that both ‘Tallulah’ and ‘Chayanne’ dont have cracks. Phil straight up looks at ‘Chayanne’ and says “You are fake, you arent my son.” Also same thing with Tallulah, Chayanne and Phil check in with each other. They are a well oiled machine. Phil knows Chayanne like the back of his hand and vise versa.

To be fair, Chayanne isnt an egg of many words. He likes action and just nods/shakes of his head when talking. If need be he will place a sign down, but he doesnt talk as much as Tallulah. So it isnt hard to impersonate him.

But the second, ‘Chayanne’ started punching Phil was again bone chilling. Chayanne rarely hits Phil, maybe once or twice from the top of my head. Again, Chay and Lulah are very respectful of Phil. If they need his attention, they do other ways. They dont hit.

And thats when Phil let Fit know that something was wrong. Those werent his kids. That they are fakes. Around that time, Phil runs home and sees that his actual kids are sleeping. He takes a photo, runs back, and fucking shows ‘Chayanne’. Phil lets the fakes know that he knows and he doesnt give a shit.

At some point, Phil and Fit talk again and ‘Chayanne’ runs up and tries to take the photo from Phil. Phil basically said fuck off and went back to his seat.

The part I find so fucking eerie was that Fit and ‘Chayanne’ had a lil talk. ‘Chayanne’ put down a sign that said something along the lines of “My dad doesnt love me anymore”.

That sign literally made me start to freak out because thats the fucking last thing the real Chayanne thinks. The real Chayanne knows that his dad loves him to death. That Phil would burn this server to the ground if anything bad happened to Chayanne. Chayanne knows that Phil does everything in his power to keep his son alive. He knows how much Phil worries about him and Tallulah (both the characters and the admins).

Going back to what I said at the start, the admins were so fucking smart for picking Chayanne and Tallulah to be the ‘Code eggs’.

People outside of Phil, Fit, Bad, and maybe Forever/Cellbit dont really spend time with Chayanne and Tallulah. Yes, other people do care after them and know them, but they really dont know their mannerisms and quirks. They dont know that Tallulah only shakes her Maracas when she is very excited or have something to say. They dont know that, while Chayanne can be hyper, he usually is very obedient and stays close to Tallulah when he can.

So putting them in a party where the attention isnt on them 100% time is so smart. They can run around and people dont think about it. They just see two eggs running around and having fun. They dont know how wrong it is to see them like that.

Then when the ‘Code eggs’ made themselves known, Phil got kicked. Again very smart from the admins because no one wanted to kill ‘Chayanne’ and ‘Tallulah’ even though they were obviously Codes. Even Fit, who Phil told over and over again that those arent his kids, hit the Codes once or twice but stopped because he didnt wanna take that risk. No one wanted to take the chance of hurting an egg. It gave the ‘Code eggs’ time to kill Charlie and try to kill others.

But the second Phil joins back, he is screaming that those arent his kids and to kill them. That they were impostors. Even then, they let Phil kill the Code eggs.

Then when Code Tallulah died, everyone stepped back and let Phil 1v1 Code Chayanne.

Im so impressed with the admins and the people who played the fake Chayanne and Tallulah. They did such a good job of putting a spear of ice through my heart. 100/10 Bravo

[redstarwriting]

the clash | v. ever fallen in love

hobie brown x goth!reader

word count: 3.1k

genre: enemies to lovers

warnings: language, insults, hobie hating you, you hating hobie, mentions of death, demonic names, mentions of injuries, giving and receiving stitches, geniuses being dumbasses

a/n: these keep getting longer LMAO which is wild too bc i literally had an idea to make this chapter even longer, but i had to end up splitting it up. thank you to everyone who’s reading the series, i appreciate you all more than you will ever know. please enjoy this chapter, the next should be out either late tonight or tomorrow :)

previous chapter: iv. london calling

now reading: v. ever fallen in love

next chapter: vi. (with someone you shouldn’t’ve)

───────────────────────────────────

It’s been a few months since you’ve become a part of Spider Society, and much to everyone’s disappointment, you and Hobie still hate each other. Even though on any given day the two of you will be seen around each other, you’re always arguing. Yelling. There have been multiple times where the two of you almost fought, but someone always breaks it up before it gets to that point. “Ready to go, Hobie?” Gwen asks, and he scoffs. “Can’t believe ‘m bein’ forced to go to that dickhead’s world by you of all people,” he grumbles, and she rolls her eyes. “C’mon man, we all know that you’ve both been way more irritable towards everyone because you haven’t seen each other in what? Like two days?”

“I’ll be a lot worse when I see them, I can promise ya that, mate,” he snaps and Miles shakes his head. “Yeah, sure. Whatever, Hobie,” he says as Gwen pulls up the portal to your world. “Are you excited to see them? I haven’t seen you two apart for this long ever, you’re always together,” Pavitr says, side-eying Hobie. He keeps trying to tell Gwen and Miles the two of you only hate each other because you have strong feelings for one another and don’t know how to face them.

“I’m telling you, they’re obsessed with each other,” Pavitr says as he, Gwen, and Miles sit in his home, sipping some chai. “Obsessed with wanting to kill each other maybe, but that’s about it,” Miles says, and Pavitr groans. “No! You’ve got it all wrong! Neither of them knows how to express their feelings and that’s the only reason they act the way they do!” he tries to convince them, but Gwen and Miles just glance at each other. “I don’t know, Pav,” Gwen says. “I picked up on the romantic tension between the two of you immediately, why are you doubting my genius social cue reading now?”

“You need to stop being such a romantic, Pav. The two of them would rather eat glass than be romantically involved in any way,” Gwen responded, but Pavitr was not convinced.

He still isn’t. Hobie laughs. “Excited? You must be mental to think I’d be chuffed to see them,” he responds, and Pavitr sighs. One day. One day he will get Hobie to admit he cares for you.

Gwen was honestly a little nervous for this little meet-up. The two of you had a really bad fight recently, and trying to get the two of you back to talking level seems a little ambitious.

“You what?” he yelled, causing you to roll your eyes. “I’m being mentored by Miguel.” Hobie stares at you, not saying anything, with his mouth slightly open before he shakes his head. He’s very angry, but you simply don’t care. “He’s helping me, Hobie. We both have the venomous bite thing, so he’s trying to help me out with it and helping me adjust to–”

“Don’t you dare say adjust to fuckin’ Spider Society like I ain’t been here the whole time.”

“You never necessarily helped, Hobie. Unless you count constantly insulting me and–”

“Nah, don’t gimme that fuckin’ rubbish, (Y/n),” he growls, and you cross your arms. “Why are you so mad about it anyway?” He laughs. “Why am I mad? Seriously?! You’re the right fuckin’ hand of the pitch and toss!”

“The what?” you ask and he groans. “The fuckin’ boss, (Y/n)! The man!”

“So what, Hobart?! In case you forgot you’re a part of this society, you listen to Miguel too!”

“I fuckin’ don’t!”

“You fucking do!” By this point, you’d pulled attention from several other spiders, not only because of the yelling but because their senses were going off. The two of you were too focused on each other to realize they were all ready to pounce on the two of you. “Fuckin’ piss off before I do somethin’ we both regret,” he growls, and you laugh. “Make me.”

The two of you were separated after that and haven’t talked to each other since. Granted, it’s only been two days, but that is long for the two of you, honestly. And it’s been making everyone a target of Hobie’s rude remarks and your cynicism. The two of you need to talk because clearly, not talking just makes the two of you feel worse.

Even though Hobie’s acting like this is the worst thing his friends could possibly do to him, he does kind of sort of miss you. Which he hates. It’s been two days and he’s already missing you? Disgusting. He can’t wait to yell at you about it. He’s able to keep his cool and pretend like he really doesn’t want to go, but in reality, he’s so anxious to see you. “Alright, come on,” Gwen says, motioning for Hobie to enter the portal. He glances around at them. “Makin’ me go first?”

“Can’t have you run off at the last minute,” Gwen says and he sighs. “Whatever,” he says, walking a little too fast into the portal. He only stops when he’s enveloped in a familiar darkness. He feels something brush up against his leg, and he lets go of a breath he didn’t even realize he was holding. “Good seein’ ya, Shadow,” he says, bending down to give your cat some attention. Shadow headbutts him and he scratches between his ears. Your cat loves Hobie, much to your disdain.

“You hurt him, I kill you,” you said to him the second time he was at your place. He picked up Shadow while you were in your room, and when you came out and saw him holding your baby, you were ready to fight. But you were ready to fight him at any given moment anyways. “I won’t hurt him. He’s much cooler than his owner anyways,” Hobie says, petting his head. You roll your eyes. “Yeah well– wait is he purring?” you say, and Hobie smirks at you. “Looks like he likes me better than his owner too.”

“Shut the fuck up. Shadow!” you call your cat, your voice going from a tone that screams ‘I hate you’ to one that screams ‘I love you.’ Of course, Shadow’s ears perk up and he hops out of Hobie’s arms and right over to yours. You stick your tongue out at Hobie, who rolls his eyes and looks away to cover up the dusting of a smile on his face. “What are you, 12?” he asks, and you scoff. “Can I hold Shadow?” Pavitr asks, and you hand him to him without a second thought. But no matter who you passed him to, he’d either end up in yours or Hobie’s lap.

He's so lost in the memory that he doesn’t even sense you approaching. “So, you decided to actually show up. I’m surprised,” he hears your voice and looks up at you. “Wasn’t exactly by choice, love. If I had it my way, I’d never be in this hellhole again,” he retorts, and you just shake your head and say nothing. That’s strange. You thought for sure you would mention something about him being forced to do something even though he always does what he wants. “What? Have you lost your spitfire after only two days of not talkin’ to me?” he asks, standing. You sigh. “I just… I don’t have the energy to fight today, Hobie. Okay?”

Don’t have the energy? You literally always have the energy to fight with him. Before he can say anything else, Pavitr comes through the portal.

“(Y/n)! How have you been?” he asks, excitedly, hugging you. Hobie doesn’t like that. But what he doesn’t like even more is the slight look of pain that spreads across your face for a split second. He observes silently as you play it off like nothing happened, and Pavitr is none the wiser to it. Gwen and Miles enter shortly after, and the dynamic you all had before yours and Hobie’s attempted murder of each other returns. Except for the constant bickering between you and Hobie. Instead, it’s just a lot of silent glaring, and subtle reactions. “Okay, hold on. What the hell is this?” Miles asks, and you both look at him. “What?” you say at the same time, ending in a side eye to each other. “That! That right there, why aren’t you two threatening to tear each other’s heads off because you said the same thing?” Miles asks, and Hobie shrugs. “I got nothin’ to say to them.”

“Ditto,” you say, and the three of them look at you two like your heads just got cut off. “Are you serious?”

“Do I look like I’m havin’ a laugh, mate?” Hobie snaps at Miles and he puts his hands up in surrender. “This… is odd. I can’t recall the last time it was quiet between you two.”

“Because it never was. They always went for each other’s throats like their own lives depended on it,” Pavitr says to Gwen, and you clear your throat. “We’re right here, you know,” you say with a forced grin. “Yeah, care to save the talkin’ bout us til we aren’t around?” Hobie grumbles and the three glance at each other before nodding. “Sorry, you two…” Gwen says, and you shrug. “It’s whatever. Dealt with worse,” you say, and Hobie nods. He glances over at you again. How is no one else noticing how weird you’re acting? Is he the only one who pays attention to you or some shit?

This isn’t the first time he’s picked up on your odd behaviors. Within the time he knew you, he was able to notice your behaviors unlike anyone else.

He wasn’t necessarily looking for you. He’d never go out of his way to look for you in a million years, yet here he was. In your world because you didn’t show up at the allotted time everyone was gonna meet up at in his world. He webbed up to the tallest building, the Ember Stake Building. It resembled that of a wooden stake, except all black and metal instead of wood. Sure enough, you were there. “You’re late.”

You turn and look at him, but don’t say anything. Instead, you just turn away. He frowns. “What’s that all about, then?” he asks, plopping next to you. You sigh. “I think I’m just gonna stay here tonight.”

“What? Why? Because you’re too borin’ to do anythin’ fun? Gotta work late tonight?”

“No. Personal reasons,” you say and he cocks his head to the side. “Such as?”

“Fuck off, Hobie. I’m not telling you.”

“Yes, you are. What’s goin’ on in that empty head of yours?” he asks and you give him an unamused look. “It’s the anniversary of my Uncle Belial’s death,” you mumble. He frowns. “Ah. I see.”

“...Yeah.” The two of you sit in silence, the wind the only noise happening before he sighs. “Well then, you’re definitely comin’ tonight.” He stands. You look at him. “I just said-”

“And I don’t give a shit. Come on, your friends are waitin’ for you. Besides, they can help ya get your mind off of it. Chop-chop.” You ended up going because you were forced to. But you did have a good time. Hobie was right, it helped you get your mind off of things. And maybe you were reading into it, but he seemed just a tad bit nicer to you that night than normal.

And you could tell his. 

“And what the hell is your problem today?” you appear behind Hobie who is angrily restringing his guitar in his common room at Spider Society. “Well now you’re a part of it,” he responds. You sit on the floor across from him. “As much as I’m happy just my presence can reduce you to a massive asshole, I don’t think I’m the only reason this time.”

“How could you even tell?”

You shrug. “You busy your mind and hands when you’ve got something on your mind,” you say, and he looks at you. He clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “Didn’t realize you were obsessed with me.”

“You wish,” you say. He sighs. “New group of fascist assholes showed up today,” he begrudgingly opens up and you nod. “Told you so.” He glares at you. “Had to say it,” you say, “But you’ll beat them. You always do.” He glances at you. “And if you can’t, I’ll just take care of it for you.” He laughs, unamused. “I’d like to see you try.”

He’s unsure why so many memories are flooding back to him at this moment in time. The answer is that he’s obsessed with you and Pavitr is right, but we don’t need to talk about that until he realizes it for himself. Maybe not seeing you has made him think about you more for some reason. He shakes his head, rejoining the conversation. Everything goes surprisingly well for the rest of the time you all are together. Unfortunately, Gwen gets a notice that something is happening in her world, and she has to go. Miles follows, and Pavitr is torn between going with them or staying with the two of you to make sure no one gets murdered. Or to see some romantic shit.

“We been behavin’, haven’t we?” Hobie says, a bit relieved they were leaving so he could find out what was up with you. You were close with the others, but even they’ve commented on you two only opening up with each other. “You actually have… and maybe it’d be good to leave them alone. Talk out whatever issues they’re having,” Miles says to Pavitr and Gwen, who look at each other but reluctantly agree. Miles and Pav rush into Gwen’s world before her. “I swear if you two kill each other I’m going to kill both of you,” Gwen says, walking backward into the portal to her world and pointing at the two of you. “We won’t.”

“Probably,” Hobie finishes, and Gwen rolls her eyes before disappearing. There’s a silent tension between the two of you before he speaks up. “What happened?”

“I don’t know what you’re–”

“Don’t play dumb with me, now. What happened?” he pushes, and you frown at him. Shadow leaps up into your lap and nuzzles you. You sigh and gently pet him. Hobie stays silent, watching and waiting. “Just… bad day,” you mumble. “Bad day, how?”

“Bad spider day.” He hums. “That why you looked like Pav stabbed ya after that hug?” You look at him, surprised. “You saw that?”

“Course I did. ‘m not fuckin’ daft,” he responds, and you look at Shadow. “Yeah… it’s nothing, though. Just a few scratches, typical Spider-Person shit,” you say, and he nods. “Let me see, then.”

“What?”

“Let me see.”

“Why?”

“Cause you’re lyin’,” he shrugs, and you glare at him. “Have I told you I hated you?”

“Not recently, but yeah.” You glare at him but sigh. “Fuck you, Hobie,” you mumble, but shrug off your oversized cardigan. His eyes widen as he sees deep lacerations and bruises spread across your shoulder and onto your back. He stands up and approaches you without even realizing it. You watch him as he studies your injuries. “Who did this?” His voice sounds darker than you’ve ever heard it. You look away from him. “Does it matter?”

“Yes,” he responds immediately. You turn your head to look at him again, only to have him staring directly into your eyes. “Prowler,” you mumble, and he frowns. “The worst of the worst in your world,” he whispers to himself, recalling a conversation the two of you had months ago. He glances around. “Where’s your first aid kit?” he asks, and you look at him with a side-eye. “Why?”

“Cause I wanna get high off the painkillers in it, why do you think, you dolt?” he snaps, and you point to your bathroom. “Under the sink.” He gets up and walks into your bathroom, grabs the first aid kit, and walks back out to you on your couch. “Turn round and move a bit,” he says, and you do. He sits behind you, starting to clean and stitch to your injuries up. You wince slightly and he frowns. “Why haven’t you done this yet?”

“I can’t reach back there myself.”

“Then ask someone else to do it.”

“I don’t have anyone to ask anymore.”

“Yes, you do,” he says without missing a beat. You turn your head to say something snarky to him, but he looks at you at the same time. Your faces are closer than the two of you expected, causing you both to quickly look away. You can feel your face burning, and you’re grateful the injuries are mainly on your back and not close to your heart because you don’t want to hear his comments about how fast it’s beating. On an equal note, Hobie’s happy you aren’t looking at him because he has his jaw clenched and swallows hard. His heart is beating just as fast, but he pretends like it’s nothing, just like you. He finishes the stitches, placing bandages over top of them. “Done,” he says, and you mutter a quick ‘thank you’ as he tosses the first aid kit onto your coffee table. “Should be healed by tomorrow,” you mumble, and he nods. “When did that happen?”

“A few hours before you all got here,” you admit, and he frowns. “And you were just gonna pretend nothing happened?”

“Yes. I told you earlier, I’m too tired to deal with any bullshit today, okay?” you confess, and he frowns.

“He get ya that good cause you’re tired?”

“I guess.”

“When’s the last time you slept?”

“Dunno.”

“Stop lyin’ love,” he says, and the nickname you hate oh so much sounds just a little sweeter to you than it should. “Couple days ago.”

“You haven’t slept in two days?” You shake your head, and he sighs. “Go the fuck to sleep. Now.”

“But–”

“Go,” he demands, pointing to your bedroom. You groan, “You’re so fucking annoying,” you mumble, getting up and dragging yourself to your room. “Yeah, yeah whatever,” he says, following you. You flop onto your bed as he leans against the doorframe, arms crossed. “Come to tuck me in?”

“You wish,” he watches as Shadow hops up onto your bed, curling up against you. You immediately put your hand on him and pet him. Hobie frowns as he feels a pang of annoyance toward your cat. “Gonna stand there and watch me sleep or something?” your voice pulls him out of his ridiculous thoughts, and he scoffs. “Gonna stand here and make sure you don’t try to get up as soon as I go,” he says, and you sigh. “Fine,” you mutter, rolling away from him. He stands there until he’s sure you’re asleep. He glances at Shadow, who is still awake and staring at him. He puts his finger to his lips to say “shh” as he pulls his mask over his head.

He and the Prowler of this world need to have a bit of a chat.

───────────────────────────────

『 tag list 』

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*if you are italicized - i am unable to tag you for whatever reason, feel free to reach out and see if we can fix the issue

if you asked to be on the taglist and i forgot, i’m sorry :( feel free to leave a comment on this or message me separately and i’ll get you right onto it!

[sturnad]

NIGHT SHIFT p1

Pairing: y/n and Chris Sturniolo

Summary: a girl that just started working in a local cafe in her small town and a boy who just moved into her town because of his dads job.

Warnings: none

Finally, the last costumer before i close up..Atleast thats what i thought. My eyes flashed before my mind as i saw a tall brunette boy walk in. He closed the door behind him and as he walked over to the counter i quickly jumped behind my coworker and whispered to her while holding on to her apron.

"omg omg...can you please serve himm?" i whispered. She rolled her eyes at me and noded a no as she slightly pulled her apron out of my fist. "get up." she said motioning me to serve him. I sighed and walked over to the front. I put on a fake polite smile even though my stomach was doing flips. He finally walked over and looked around thinking what he should get before he finally spoke up.

"Hello.. could I get a chai tea please?" he said.

I noded while trying to get my words out. "Yeah..coming right up."

I quickly walked over to make his order. He just sat down on a chair behind the counter, patiently waiting while scrolling on his phone.

...As i waited for the water to boil i noticed my coworker walking up to me in the corner of my eye. She moved my hair out of her way and whispered. "Ohh do you like him??" she said.

My face turned PALE. I noded a no. God i was bad at lying. She chuckled at me and shaked her head before returning back to work.

I made his tea and awkwardly walked up to him. I slowly placed his order on the counter he was sitting behind. "Here you go.." i said quietly with a small grin on my face. I tried asking if he needed anything else but i stuttered so i just gave up.”U-m w- would- you like anything e-else?..” i said with my cheeks RED. He just laughed it off and smiled.. “you’re cute.. no im good tho..”. After i heard the words that came from his mouth i blushed so hard before smiling politely and walking away.

I quickly made my way to the “workers only” room and pulled my phone out of my back pocket and texted my bestfriend;

"Omg girl you wont believe it im literally shaking right now. Theres a boy who came into the cafe right before we closed up. Hes soooo cuttee!! Ive never seen him before though.." i quickly typed in before turning the phone off, shoving it back into my pocket and returning back.

As I washed the dishes from the last costumers my mind was full of the worst scenarios and things;

Should I ask if he moved here?

No why would you do that dumbass.

Hes so cute.

Omg what if i embarrass myself right in front of him!

..and suddenly my coworker snapped her fingers in my face. "Are you even washing the dishes y/n?" I snapped out of it and noded as i looked down at the running water.

He finished his drink and left the money on the counter before he just disappeared. I picked the money up and noticed that he left a tip, I smiled to myself, looking at the money before putting it in the register.

...Who is that boy?

-

We closed the cafe and i left to go home.

For the whole ride home i was thinking about him.

..but really who is he?

PART TWO coming soon

first time writing i hope its alright..

Im going to make multiple parts of this cause it will get interesting (i hope). If yall do not like the story keep scrolling.

TAGS:

@imwetforyourmom

[chaifootsteps]

Hi hi! It's me, Concerned Anon (Directed to the Anon who had expressed feeling threatened.). The doc I created is NOT meant to harass people. I am fine with regular people in the fandom, it's extended to people like DJ and the like. I scrolled through the Doc and there's nothing of the sorts threatening people to off themselves.

If that's the case, then I would remove it. This is towards Chai as I treat him as a source. I feel like most people assume the Doc has content that's "Extreme as all hell" when in reality my language is only directed at people who commit actual crimes, I am not that extreme with my beliefs and anyone who name drops me on twitter for "threatening behavior" is only spreading false narratives and this ask is meant to clarify some things.

I do not care for the tame side of the fandom, as long as your not doing anything shitty and bad then it's fine by me.

The beginning of the Doc has stated numerous times to not harass others or send any hate. Hence: "If you are reading this with the full intent to harass anyone in the critic community or even outside of, then don’t. Especially if you follow Viv’s work and worship her. This will only further add more to the document and cause more issues than not. This document is meant to inform and educate/help others and make sure that Viv doesn’t get away with anything, as much as you like to not listen to what has been said, just act civilly and don’t act like it’s the end of the world because someone says VivziePop’s writing is bullshit. This will also serve as an open letter of some sorts, a walking, living, reading example of what the fanbase has done, that if VivziePop tries anything, we can show this document. You can still like her work and be critical of it, no one’s forcing you to not like it. "

The end of the Doc has a harsh message to the more "messed up side" as usual, most of us cannot control who comes to who, but we can also tell people to NOT harass others.

I do not intend to spread hate, if anything I am harsh on people like DJ, Dani and the creator.

My blog is not a Critic Space, nor do I intend for it to be that way. People who clarify this post as me being "harsh" hasn't read the full doc and are going off what Fans are saying.

I am simply only harsh to people who harass others for opinions, Dox, send death threats etc. Anything as a result of my Doc is my bad. But it's not in bad faith. I am simply doing my due diligence of cleaning up the Fandom, and if you haven't done anything wrong then I see no point in worrying.

I know this ask targeted to Chai, but this is for everyone whose worried. I am not some crazy "Critic" I am just someone whose Mentally Ill, with several disabilities who have been mistreated by the fandom and keeping archives.

By all accounts I am a normal human being. I just want to post Dragon Ball, not be called someone who wants to "hurt others" (trust me, the last time I did I ended up in the loony bin. I literally had the FBI shown up to my place."

So yeah, Doc isn't meant to sent any harassment, and if there's people doing that, cut that out. I am not dealing with this shit right now, as I already got alot on my hand.

I once again want to apologize if my "posts" causes issues. Not my intentions.

--Cooler's Malewife, Anon

Passing this along even though I have absolutely no idea what doc you're referring to. It sounds fair to people who enjoy the shows though, which is the way it should be.

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 16

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

Hello! Another day, another chapter!

I really don't have much to ramble about today, but I am back on my tea. This is a new one from the ren faire this year- vanilla chai with sugar and milk. The cup is from the same ren faire (but purchased last year).

let's go let's let's go- I am already impatient to get into this chapter.

Last chapter we ended on a cliffhanger with Luo Binghe totally unconscious- we start this chapter with Shen QIngqiu ready to rescue his man and escape!

It's really so upsetting that he is going back to trash (two bar) spiritually energy in this body when he was so used to his mushroom Unlimited Power p65

RIP Luo Binghe's skull LOL he is really being tossed around like a rag doll. SQQ needs to be more careful. p66

MXTX said forget the only one bed trope, I raise you -> There Was Only One Coffin p67

Fuck. This is actually so scary 10/10 I would pee myself if a little skeletal arm was worming it's way into the coffin I was temporarily occupying (really anything in this book's reality would make me die of fright. as an aside I was talking to my partner about this while watching MDZS donghua yesterday, in the world of cultivators I would be a dumpling stall owner. I could never with the sword training and literal corpses). pp67-68

I CANT 'extenuating circumstances'. SQQ definitely: I just HAD to kiss his cute little forehead to save our lives. p68

i'm crying LOL "a person's abdomen is supposed to be the softest spot on their body, but Luo Binghe's was uncomfortably hard against Shen Qingqiu's stomach. The farther down he pulled him, the more he was sure that Luo Binghe had an eight-pack. Was that a rock slab down there?" p70

this keeps getting worse LMAO

OOOOO Meng Mo is back! Is it weird that I kind of love this guy? He has such a cool power and is a bit of a dick, but in the best and worst of ways. Him and Airplane give similar energy and I am not mad about it. p72

oh gosh! LBH is either "fatally ill" or "close to death" p72

wait- adding to the above point. he could also be mentally very unwell :( poor buddy -> it's likely this option. p72

so even though SQQ is processing nothing , I think SQQ admitting (not naming the feeling but admitting) that he is feeling a mess of emotions about Luo Binghe is a big step for him! p73

Meng Mo seems to have a lot of feelings about LBH. I am not sure if it's just pride or what but whatever it is he is correct here, "The way this elder sees it, he (LBH) should either kill you (SQQ) or do you!" p74

PLEASE OH NO

I AM WHEEZING

+1000 Protagonist Satisfaction Points for touching LBH's "Heavenly Pillar" p76

IM DYING OH NO

WHY IS THIS EVEN A THOUGHT IF HE THINKS HE'S STRAIGHT "He couldn't exactly help Luo Binghe jerk off under these circumstances, right?!" p76 But like if not these circumstances he is cool with doing it in other circumstances???????????

oh no! SQQ blocking the blades with his bare hand for LBH p79

Dang. the Old Palace Master has been through some shit. p80

Are we getting more of Shen jiu's story??? We have Qiu Haitang here too! p81 (just as an aside because my notes did not revisit this, we do not get more of his story just weird little hints. That I hope Shang Qinghua clears up later). p81

What a terrible combo. Old Palace master is just butthurt Luo Binghe doesn't want him as a teacher or to marry his daughter and Qiu Haitang seems to be just a vile woman with a grudge against SQQ for some reason. pp82-83

Okay but as horrible as OPM is, that cultivation he's doing with his voice is kind of cool. p85

Wait. Did the Old Palace Master have a thing for Su Xiyan? This is so fucking weird for LBH and he's not even conscious pp86-87

reading further the above point got so much worse omg :(((((((((((( I'm so upset for Su Xiyun. p87

It got even worse with the implications of what it meant for Luo Binghe in that sect. That terrible terrible man deserved that horrifying death. Fuck that guy! pp 89-90

OMG SQQ, basically half dead carrying LBH, barely got away from the death flower room, and here we have Tianglang-jun back on his bullshit. p94

SQQ is in such a bad state :o pp94-95

Is this another dime??? Our demon blood piggy bank for SQQ is now at $0.40 p97

YAY! Luo Binghe is awake! (is he going to be okay mentally though??)p 99

Why is Luo Binghe so mad? Like this man just nearly died trying to get you the fuck out of there p100

Fucking finally okay, it got better LBH is realizing what SQQ did while he was unconscious pp102-103

I'm glad they cleared that up (even though there was the other added miscommunication about LBH thinking SQQ was crying when he was actually just in a fuck ton of pain). p104

I am actually so glad that the discussion was interrupted before LBH found out about the dick touching being real LOL p108

MORE DEMON BLOOD. -> SQQ's dime bank is at $0.50

How many times does this man get kidnapped?

We really ended with him being kidnapped again and with Luo Binghe being conned by his own dad. That was so rough. -500 dignity points (not really but it sure feels like it)

[dksw0rld]

How I Achieved Glass Skin Without Trying

Yes, you read that right. I achieved glass skin literally without trying at all. With glass skin being pretty much the last thing on my mind actually. Partly because I was never insecure about my skin as I really didn't have any acne issues. I had smaller bumps on my forehead and a little bit on the other parts of my face but no big breakouts or chronic issues. Also partly because I was so focused on something else...want to learn how you can also achieve clear skin without actually trying to achieve clear skin? Keep reading for all the deets.

Okay, so, as I mentioned above - clear skin was not my focus. It was genuinely the last thing on my mind. My focus was on something better. My focus was (and is) on my overall health. Women nowadays are so focused on 10 step skincare routines to achieve clear skin and retain youthfulness. This is not me putting anyone down, if a 10 step skincare routine makes you happy than by all means continue on! I'm merely pointing out that women don't need to do all of that to heal their skin. The key word in that last sentence is heal. But enough of me talking, here's what I did to completely clear my skin by focusing on my overall health. **Everything I name below are things I still do.

Diet

I focused on consuming nourishing foods

I have veggies and / or fruit at every meal. No exception. I don't go a day without consuming them. I focus on foods that nourish my body from the inside out. I don't eat processed anything. I consume other types of carbs, not just bread or pasta.

2. I began to drink coconut water and pure pineapple juice first thing in the morning

I drink 8 - 10oz of coconut water mixed with pineapple juice every morning. I've seen a big difference with my hydration levels throughout the day.

3. I severely limited fizzy drinks

There's a specific brand of sparkling water I love (it's called Clear American) and I used to drink it regularly. There's nothing super unhealthy about this brand but it's still carbonated. When I began to limit drinking sparkling water, I noticed a difference in my body and skin. I also very rarely drink soda, and if I do it's always Ginger Ale. I mainly drink water with lemon, organic lemonade and hot tea.

4. I limit bread to one meal a day

I always eat a type of carb during breakfast as they give me the energy I need to go through the day. *Side note* carbs are not bad for you. Your body needs them! Processed carbs are what should be avoided. Anyways, I only eat bread one time a day and then I'll eat other types of carbs throughout the day. The bread I eat is always the least amount of processed possible. I only eat sourdough or whole grain bread. I like going to famers markets to purchase my bread. If I don't eat bread for breakfast then I'll potentially eat a slice or two at lunch but I avoid eating bread for dinner. I like to consume things my body can more easily break down at dinner.

5. I cut out alcohol

I never drank a whole lot. I've always been a 'glass of wine while hanging with my best friend' type of woman, but if I was out on the town I would drink cocktails. I cut mixed drinks out completely. If I go out I'll order a pineapple juice or ginger beer (which despite its name, is nonalcoholic). I will very occasionally have a glass of wine but that's about it.

6. I limited my caffeine intake

I have a cup of coffee with creamer and sugar in the morning and that's it for coffee. If I'm slowing down in the middle of the day I drink water first and make sure to get up and take a walk around my office to get my blood flowing. If I'm still dragging after a full cup of water and 30 minutes, I'll drink a chai, other caffeinated tea or a matcha.

Lifestyle

1. I shortened my skin care routine to 2-3 steps

Your skin does not need a lot. It needs to be taken care of from the inside out way more than it needs products on it. In the morning I do a serum, very very light exfoliation and a moisturizing hyaluronic acid lotion. At night I cleanse, put on eye cream and use the same lotion. Once or twice a week I'll do a face mask. That's it! When I switched to this simple routine and focused on my overall health, my skin began to thrive.

2. I began to walk more

I sustained an injury so I wasn't able to walk as much as I was before. Once my injury healed and I was able to walk again (in the midst of all the other changes I was making), I noticed a difference in my energy level and changes in my body. Walking is so great for you, including great for your skin!

3. I began to sleep with a satin pillowcase every night

I ditched the regular pillowcase and switched to a satin one. I did this switch for my hair, not my skin but I've noticed it's helped with my skin a lot as well.

That's it! Once I made these simple changes and was consistent with them, I began to notice how much more amazing I felt. Then one day I looked up and my skin was completely clear. Not a small bump in sight. You don't need to buy all these acne products off of Amazon to get rid of your problem areas. Focus on nourishing and healing your body from the inside out. That's the secret.

[janglingargot]

The last couple of weeks have been a whirlwind, and Peppermint is only just starting to catch her breath. She knows how important it is to put out the fires they set in the process of taking down Kale. And of course, it's on them to clean up the messes that he and his lackeys left behind, as unfair as that can seem. But their little team has been keeping so busy that it feels like they hardly see each other, some days.

It's not hard to catch Chai, of course. (He literally sleeps on her couch.) But Macaron, true to his word, has thrown himself into helping her mom rebuild Vandelay Technologies, overseeing a full refit of the R&D department to turn the page on what he's calling the "Zanzo era"--and CNMN is being incredibly patient about the repair process for his legs, but in the meantime, he has to be carried anywhere he wants to go--and Korsica…well. Korsica is a model of responsibility and sterling-silver work ethics, and she seems really determined to make amends for the past and earn her place as part of Vandelay's future, which unfortunately means she's been working almost non-stop.

Things seem to be finally calming down, thank god. When Peppermint finished fixing up her mom's old truck the other day, she'd asked Macaron to drive them all down to the water, specifically because it felt like ages since they'd just hung out together.

And that evening was everything she'd hoped for, really! (Well, almost everything.) It was a perfect break from the daily grind; just their little band and the sunset over the ocean. She actually caught herself wishing they didn't have to drive home again, when it started to get dark.

It's strange to find herself seeking out anyone's company. She'd gotten used to thinking of herself as a loner. But…Peppermint misses her friends.

(AO3 link to the rest)

[obscurecurse]

Because I just looooove the "trying to protect you from something by keeping you in the dark about it only led you directly into it - I have created a monster" trope.... CONCEPT: AU where Porchay gets involved in minor organized crime elsewhere in the city as a way to get back at both Porsche (for not telling him the truth about his line of work) and also to get back at Kim (for lying to him/breaking his heart)? Chay is pretending to be all tough and bad but barely knows how to hold a gun at first. He's smarter than his brother though, so he works his way up the evil crime ladder pretty easily. Kim finds out first. He's furious, obvs. The potential for angst is crazy here - and not that far from the canon angst - because Kim only pushed Chay away to protect him, but now, if Chay is like this, maybe he doesn't need to? But Kim also fought so hard to extract himself from the family business - it took him a lot of hard work - and here Chay is doing the fucking opposite and messing everything up for himself.

Kim tries to blackmail Chay. He's like, "If you don't stop this right now, I'll tell your brother." and Chay is like, "I literally don't care what you do." Which is a total lie, but Kim believes it so he goes for plan B and just takes Chay as a hostage to get him out of there/put him in a time out. Chay is pissed, obvs. He's in the back of the van banging on the walls like, "You don't even like me, why the fuck do you care what I do?" etc. Kim does not realize how much power Chay has on the other end of the city so now Chay's gang is going after the Theerapanyakuns for taking their leader. Kinn calls Kim and is like, "For someone who claims to be uninterested in the family business you sure are making big fucking business decisions this evening. Where is Chay?" (Kinn, of course, already knew about all Chay's antics and didn't tell anyone but quietly kept an eye on things to protect Chay bc he is a good quasi-brother-in-law.) Kim is like, "What?" Kinn is like, "Bring him to me. I'll clean up your mess." Chay is still yelling at him from the back seat about how he's a shitty friend and a liar and a manipulator as Kim tries to decide what to do. He doesn't want to give Kinn the satisfaction of fixing this for him. Eventually Kim snaps he's like, "i LoVe YoU oKaY i HaVe AlWaYs LoVeD yOu pLeAsE sHuT tHe FuCk Up" and Chay is quiet for a minute and then he's like, "...Untie me right now."

[sagescented]

Reading messages of hope isn't helping. Telling me "I have to turn to my community and neighbors" does nothing when all my neighbors literally have giant Trump flags hanging from their porches. No amount of "you have to keep living" and "we will survive this again" is making things better this time. Saying "I have to keep going" just makes me more despondent.

I want to believe better of people. I want to believe the world is good. I want to believe there are good people with good intentions. Because I know it's true ... But how do you continue to believe in better when they just keep doing this kind of shit so incessantly- fuck the rest of anyone else?

Maybe if I cut myself into tiny little pieces — put my skirts back on, grow my hair back out and stop headcovering, do my hair and makeup again, get rid of my Cane and Rollator, hide my tattoos and my Chai necklace, and basically go Converso and pretend to be "the good little TradWife" for the next 4 years — I'll actually survive.

But I don't want to. I'm a physically disabled, chronically ill, multi-neuroatypical, queer, Eco-Judeo-Pagan ... I'm tired of surviving being my only fucking option in life.

[tubborucho]

Yeah, I am pretty sure he thought of it as a light-hearted way to explain Sunny why Tallulah is moody. Doesn’t change the fact that it was a fucked up thing to say and genuinely hurtful for a literal toddler.

This and your point about people not being able to let go of the whole Dadza thing are two of my biggest problems with q!Phil. I know it's not cc!Phil's fault how people treat him but the way people overhype his parenting does make it more irritating as a viewer. It's not just fans, though, most characters seem to share this view of him as an amazing Dad. The fact that he stepped up for Tallulah when Wilbur left is great and the effort he puts in is great, but his parenting skills are just okay.

It feels like every time he talks to or about Sunny he ends up doing something bad that's brushed off because "that's just how Phil talks" or "he's just protecting his kids".

His reaction to Sunny's train was awful. I know he has a banter-y relationship with Tubbo but he was criticizing her father and her own choices right in front of her. It felt like he didn't even absorb any of what Tubbo was telling him. Like, why did he keep complaining about it feeling sterile when it was a brand new build and Sunny chose the white blocks themself?

The morality test about stealing the panda was completely unacceptable. Genuinely horrible thing to do to a child especially when he told her point blank at the end that it was a test that she managed to pass. Why would she trust someone who might be secretly testing her?

The talk in the museum was bad for both Sunny and Tallulah. Tallulah isn't "in a mood," she has genuine concerns but has still been making an effort with Sunny even while trying to maintain some distance. For Sunny he was playing up a very real insecurity to make a point. It's not really fair to Tubbo either, his game was having issues and he left his daughter with two of the people he trusts the most. I went to watch from the vod for slightly more context and chat reactions and Phil did not waste any time at all. The moment Tubbo was gone he rolled straight into it with Sunny.

There was also a point a few days ago where Tallulah showed some discomfort over Empanada and Phil responded with this:

Empanada’s nice, you like Empanada. You like Em. It’s Sunny you’re not a fan of. Sunny’s just all in your face with money and sunglasses and shit. But, like, Sunny’s fine too. Sunny’s just a bit much though. Sunny takes a while to get used to.

Sunny was not around for this but it's still a terrible way to talk about a child. They weren't even the egg Tallulah was concerned about at the time. And I do believe that q!Phil wasn't trying to be mean here but he still was. He is consistently unkind to Sunny even when he's trying to make a good point or a joking.

Wait, is the last thing a genuine quote? Because I haven’t heard this one before.

And yeah. Listen, Phil is a good parent. He takes care of Chayanne and Tallulah very well. He is a good parent, but it doesn’t mean that he is good that way for every other child ever. I think people forget that Dad figures in stories don’t mean that they are perfect in every adult-child relationship ever.

He is a great dad for Chay and Lullah. He is genuinely very condescending towards Sunny. It’s like every time they interact he just refuses to even try to see past his initial impression of them. Phil wrote her down for no reason as a shallow and tolerable at best kid in his books, and acts on that judgement in a way that he doesn’t care about her in any way past their basic safety and sometimes teaching them stuff if they need it immediately.

The only reason he pays Sunny any mind at all is that he cares for Tubbo. Also not in a parental way that people (and Tubbo lmao) seem to try and picture it as, but he cares. Sunny is just a tag along.

And don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that he should love her like his own or even really like her. It’s fine. I am saying that he still should treat her with the same grace as other kids that are not his – she is a child, you are speaking of and with a child, being mean about and to them is not okay. Especially because this child did literally nothing wrong.

[divorcedmalewife]

KP Anniversary Week 3; Prompt "Confession"

also posted on AO3!

Kim has never been very forthright. Very rarely is he ever direct and honest about anything in his life. 

Porchay, Kim is quickly realizing, is the exception. 

It’s been weeks since they tentatively started talking again and Kim likes to think they’ve become friends, in a weird sort of way. Kim wasn’t too sure he could be “just friends” with Porchay. But he would try. He would do anything to keep Porchay in his life. To keep his warmth and love as close as possible. 

Has Kim said any of this out loud? Of course he hasn’t. Kim has learned from a very young age that you should only tell someone the truth as a last resort. That trusting someone with your true intentions and thoughts is dangerous. 

Porchay is the opposite of Kim in that respect. He has always worn his heart on his sleeve and preferred telling the truth over a lie. Even if they lie would make his life easier. 

Kim isn’t used to the kind of honesty that Porchay brings to his life. It’s… refreshing in a way. It’s simple for Kim. He knows that no matter what, he can rely on Chay to tell him the truth. To be honest with him. 

Even in everyday life, Porchay just says what he wants to; say’s what he‘s thinking. 

“I love hia but I swear if he asks me one more time if I’m okay, I may have to punch him.”

“I don’t know if it’s just because I’m in a pissy mood but Khun is being annoying today.” 

“Your dad fucking sucks.” 

“You should wear the denim jacket more, it looks good.” 

“I like your apartment way more than the compound. I hate it here.” 

Kim finds himself replying honestly and not just saying what he thinks Porchay wants to hear. It’s a change — saying what he means and meaning what he says without worrying about what the consequences are. But that’s the effect Chay has on him. 

“Your brother can be irritating. He’d probably let you punch him though.” 

“Khun is literally always annoying. Want me to pick you up?” 

“Yeah…. He does.” 

“I like it more than the leather, actually.” 

“On my way.” 

Each time Kim lets himself be open and honest with Porchay, it feels like a secret confession. 

When Porchay reached out to Kim for the first time, asking for answers, Kim readily gave them to Porchay. He was ready to lay it all out for him. And he did. The moment Porchay asked questions, Kim gave him the honest truth. 

“Yes, it was me who left all those bodies at the bar.” 

“Yes, I loved your song, it meant everything to me.” 

“All the time we spent together was real to me too.”

But there is one thing Kim is still keeping close to his heart. He hasn’t told Porchay that he loves him. 

Porchay probably knows; he’s smart like that. But Kim knows he deserves to be told the whole truth. 

Although, Kim doesn’t think he deserves reciprocation, but he’s working on it. And Kim knows better than to make decisions for Porchay. Kim will tell him eventually and he’ll let Porchay decide where they go from there. Porchay will decide if he wants to keep being just friends or if he wants to try again. 

So they keep texting. They keep hanging out. They even play music together again. It’s everything Kim ever wanted since he realized he had fallen for Chay. All that’s missing, in Kim’s opinion, is being able to kiss Porchay and wake up next to him every morning. 

In the end, it’s not even Kim who first brings their relationship status up again. 

One lazy afternoon, Porchay has his head in Kim’s lap and he’s scrolling through social media while Kim reads a book. Kim has a hand in Porchay’s hair. To Kim, the position doesn’t seem entirely platonic; not that he’s going to complain about it. This is where Kim wants Porchay to be anyway. Kim doesn’t give a single fuck that they’re straddling the line between “just friends” and something that isn’t “just” anything.

Porchay could never be “just” anything to him. 

“P’Kim,” Porchay says quietly. 

Kim makes a questioning hum but when Porchay doesn’t say anything else, Kim puts the book down to Look Porchay in the eye — only to find Porchay is already looking up at him. He looks so soft, with his hair askew from Kim’s ministrations and the threadbare t-shirt that he borrowed from Kim’s closet. Kim feels his heartbeat quickly as he stares into the pair of eyes that made him question everything in his life. 

“Yes, Porchay?” Kim asks. 

“You love me,” Porchay says.

He doesn’t phrase it like a question. Like the statement itself is an answer. Kim supposes it is. It’s the answer to why Kim let Porchay in. It’s the answer to everything. Why is Kim doing this? Because he loves Porchay. Why is Kim acting like this? Because he loves Porchay. Why does Kim feel like he’s safe again? Because he loves Porchay. Why does Kim feel like he can be okay again? Because he loves Porchay. 

“Yeah,” Kim replies softly. “I do love you.” It’s just one more honest statement that Kim makes because he knows he can. Because he knows Chay won’t use the truth against him. 

Porchay’s bright smile in response is enough to make Kim know that every vulnerable moment with Porchay is worth it.

“I love you too,” Porchay says. 

[soulofapatrick]

Country Step - Joel Miller x Reader

Summary: Ellie and Tommy help Y/N reignite that southern cowboy in Joel during a ‘Jackson Cowboy Night’ ( I literally had a thought about Joel and Tommy line dancing)

Words: 1.5k

Warnings: make out (?) can cowboys be a warning

Joel’s POV

It’s Friday which means the barn is lit up and full of people dancing and letting loose to music that is thumping through the building. I’m not a fan of these things but Tommy and Maria insisted I came, a suspicious amount but then again it was a good excuse to catch up with them having missed so many years with my baby brother. It’s why I’m currently sat in the booth, swirling a beer as most of the teenagers and young adults are on the dance floor, having the time of their life but I don’t see Ellie anywhere. I can’t find Y/N either but that’s not as surprising because she’s so shy and-

I’m choking on my beer when Ellie enters the barn, dragging a barely recognisable Y/N. Y/N’s wearing extremely tight jeans that show off her curves while she’s only got a flannel on her top half, the flannel tied right under her chest. Her hair is falling around her shoulders in manufactured waves, her hair usually being deadly straight and she looks gorgeous. She looks like she belongs in a country movie and it dawns on me why Tommy was so persistent for me to come tonight: it’s cowboy night as he calls it. 

The pair join us and I try to keep my eyes to myself but oh fucking hell this is going to be difficult. She’s like a wet dream and I want to leap over the table and eat her up. Ever since I met Y/N while trying to get Ellie to the fireflies I’ve had feelings for her but it’s only recently I’ve been realising they’re not bad feelings. They’re dangerous, feelings like love are a weakness and no one can have weaknesses in this day and age. 

The familiar tune that is Footloose has Y/N’s head flying up, glancing at Tommy before her  eyes search for someone in the bustling barn. They light up and she’s grinning bigger than I’ve ever seen her when she catches Chai’s eyes and he’s sending her an equally big grin. 

“Gimme your hat cowboy.” She’s snatching the cowboy hat Tommy insisted on wearing, placing on her head as she meets Chai on the dance floor. Ellie; Dina and Jesse seem to understand what’s happening and makes people back up, giving the pair space. Oh fuck, I think my jaw hits the floor when the pair begin to dance. That quiet and reserved young woman I’ve travelled with for over a year now is swinging and rolling her hips in moves that is very much line dancing. Soon enough others are copying the pair and joining in, everyone laughing and just having a great time. 

I can’t stop the smile at the sight of Ellie next to Y/N, copying her every move with her head back and laugh escaping her lips. Y/N grabs Ellie’s hand, spinning the girl that has become a daughter figure to us both, causing the latter to shriek with even more laughter as Y/N lets her go and Ellie crashes into Dina. 

Y/N’s eyes find mine and she’s beckoning me over with the pull of her finger. I’m shrugging my jacket off and joining her, hands migrating straight for her hips as she gets every step correct. If I didn’t already secretly love her I think this is where I would have fallen because she is not from any state that includes line dancing of any sorts yet here she is. It’s like muscle memory for me and soon enough I’m back in the swing of it, eyes never once leaving her as she grins up at me. There’s that familiar shyness behind the excitement in those forest green eyes as she pulls my hands off her hips and I spin her into my chest. We seem to shift from line dancing in the side step, her back against my chest and my hand on her hip as the song changes to one that I think I remember being called ‘Fake ID’. 

Most people leave the dance floor after Footloose ends not knowing the moves without Y/N or Chai to follow. I don’t care because Y/N’s spinning around me, footwork perfect. I have to pull her back into my arms, hands on her waist again, pulling her close, “Do you know what you’re doing to me darling?” 

“Absolutely no idea.” She sends me a cheeky grin so I grip her tightly, one hand moving from her waist to the back of her neck as I suddenly dip her as the song ends. She lets out a shriek, hands grabbing my shoulders as if I’d drop her. It’s as if the world slows when I realise just how close our faces are, noses almost brushing. Her chest is glistening with a light sheen of sweat as it rises and falls rapidly. I’m pulling her back up, wanting to kiss her so badly but I don’t want it to be a big thing in front of everyone so I keep her hand tightly in mine as I lead the way back to our booth. 

She seems dejected, not understanding why I didn’t kiss her when it was obvious we both wanted it. I stay quiet, sliding into the booth and pulling her onto my lap as there’s no more space with Tommy; Maria; Jesse; Chai; Dina and Ellie already squashed in. Y/N’s breath catches in her throat but she settles, leaning forwards to grab her beer from earlier and I almost let out a moan as her perfectly round ass is pressing into my crotch as if she knows exactly what she’s doing. 

“Keep the hat.” Tommy sends Y/N a cheeky smile before going back to talking to Maria while the kids gush to Y/N and Chai how good they are at dancing. I just listen, wrapping my arms around her waist and pressing a kiss to her shoulder causing her to relax back against my chest. We stay like that for the rest of the night as the party carries on, the others going up to dance every so often if a song they like comes on. 

“Where’d you learn to dance like that?” I ask as I walk her home, the winter air freezing and the lights not doing much to illuminate the streets. 

“I may have asked Tommy for a few lessons,” She mumbles and my heart swells, “I wanted to impress you. I love seeing you happy and smiling.” 

“I fucking love you.” It slips out and she’s stopping walking, forest eyes wide and full of so many emotions. She doesn’t move when I approach her, cupping her face in my hands and pull her chin up so she catches my lips in a kiss. It seems to snap her out of her shock because her hands are in my hair and on my shoulders, melting into the kiss and pressing herself as close as she possibly can. It’s a sweet and hot kiss, not exactly how I had imagined our first kiss but that doesn’t matter as I can just recreate that idea another day. Right now her body is reacting to ever little move of my hands and my lips and it’s heaven beneath me. 

“I love you too.” She gasps out as we pull away for air and all control I have snaps. I’m picking her up by her thighs and slamming her against the nearest wall, groaning as she complies by wrapping her legs around my waist and yanking me into a kiss dirtier than I ever thought she had in her. My scalp twinges with pain but it just adds to the moment, thinking I might be hallucinating because she’s here, kissing me back with just as much heat and want.

I don’t want to do more than just make out at the moment as I have been waiting months to even get this far and I’m not ruining it by rushing her and making her think I want a quick fuck. It means I’m having to pull my lips away from hers, a chuckle rumbling in my chest when she tries to follow my lips with hers. She’s letting her head fall back against the wall, looking utterly ruined with her hair a mess, the hat lost somewhere between here and there and her lips shining and kiss swollen and we haven’t even done anything yet. This woman is going to kill me. 

That’s when two figures walk past and I shield Y/N’s body from whoever it is but it’s just Tommy and Maria heading home. Tommy meets my gaze, raising at eyebrow as he catches a glimpse of Y/N.

“Oi! Get a room!”

“Fuck you too Tommy!” 

[daeyeol4you]

The Chay Rewatch Ep. 4

As part of my KP Rewatch, I’m going to be commenting on each episode and analyzing the different Chay scenes. He’s my favorite character, and I thought I’d put down my thoughts (as well as timestamps for his scenes) as a fun way to express that.

Ep 1 & 2, Ep 3

This one is gonna be two-parter because Tumblr has character limits, please look at the reblog for part 2

Episode 4 - The Chay Drought ends, KimChay begins

Gang we are finally back to seeing Chay outside of the previously on segment

Y’all when I tell you I was so excited for this episode

I’m so intrigued by what Porsche says in the sauna. Nampueng why the hell did you say that to baby Porsche? It does develop her character beyond the silent attic wife trapped by Korn though. Clearly, growing up as an adopted child in the mafia world hardened her enough that she felt okay saying this to a child.

Also her saying this about Chay is very telling. Porsche is the heir, the one trapped by parental expectations in a world he doesn’t like (like Kinn???). He has the responsibility to bear whatever he has to in order for Chay to be free. Chay was always meant to be outside of the mafia narrative and escape in a way Nampueng knew her first born never could. Or maybe she wanted to raise a fighter and a strategist, who knows.

Time: 26:00 – 31:19 – Return of the Best Boi

Our longest Chay scene yet, this scene is so long and I kept pausing it to write down every thought in my head.

Chay, I thought we’d never see you again

Sidenote, what’s the name of the friend Chay is with? I think the fandom named him Ohm? Because I’ve seen that name used in fanfics

 “We’ve got a kind graduate that will share his experience with us.” – I know this may be a translation thing, but isn’t Kim still a student at this university? We see him on campus later on in the series getting ragged on for not going to classes, so did the MC actually mean senior? Or maybe he graduated and then is doing his master’s at the same school?

Also, very glad we somewhat got an age on Kim since if he’s a graduate or a senior that puts him in the 21-24 age range, and since Chay is looking at schools to apply to, he’s probably 18/19 age range (yes I know Barcode was younger than that at the time of filming, but Jeff is definitely older than 21-24 so I’m not going to go by actor age). Not the worst age difference, but definitely one that exists.

Chay’s Outfit: Chay immediately stands out in the crowd with his baby blue school uniform and khaki pants. Almost every other student is wearing a very, very pale pink or blue shirt with dark shorts or skirts. The viewer is immediately capable of picking out Chay among the crowd and keeping an eye on him, a hard thing for costuming to achieve when the scene is meant to be a bunch of students all dressed nearly the same. Also, Chay’s school crest says BOC International and he doesn’t have his name sewn onto his shirt like the rest of the students (I’m assuming those are names, if I’m wrong please correct me)

“Who’s that?” “It’s Wik. How could you not know?” – Chay babes, please don’t attack your bestie like that.

Chay’s friend not knowing who Wik is when Chay literally has a whole obsessive fanboy thing going on, very interesting. I understand this is to tell the audience who Wik is, but it also says a lot about Chay’s relationship with his friends. Chay is really good at hiding things when he wants to, we see that throughout the series. The only person he doesn’t really hide anything from is Kim, and that’s honestly partially because Chay has the self-confidence of a god and Kim likes ferreting out secrets.

“I want to study here because of him.” – Oh Chay, you cute little delulu stalker. I know this gets ignored because there are so many other, bigger red flags in this story, but Chay deadass stalks Kim. And no joke, Kim falls for him because of it and later stalks him back. Soulmate behavior I guess. Chay’s red flag is a high school story red flag instead of a mafia storyline red flag so it gets buried. And Chay’s friend 100% sees that. Bro nods his head while internally going damn the delulu runs deep in this one.

Kim’s Wik Outfit: The brown leather jacket with the red lining and silver studs, the insane amount of silver jewelry, the white pants! This is such an outfit. The tendrils of hair artfully hanging in his face. Good shit. Did I stare at Jeff’s hands to see if he was wearing his family ring? Yes, and I won’t be taking questions about it.

“I’ve realized that you’re my good memory. The empty calendar is now full of your name.” “Your laughter that makes me feel like it’s Friday.” - Now I want to dissect this song because this song foreshadows the KimChay relationship so hard, and you don’t really pay much attention to it during your initial viewing because obviously the viewer first time round has no idea what kind of angst KimChay is headed for. Why Don’t You Stay gets all of the praise (obviously she’s the work horse of this drama) while this song gets crumbs. Kim singing this song in front of the person he’s going to fall in love with, who turns into the one good thing in his life, who’s ‘tutoring sessions’ (i.e. the two spy missions and medley of dates afterward) take over his calendar, and who’s laughter makes his heart warm (and 100% haunts him after he makes Chay cry)

I’m really interested in how big of a star Wik is. Chay’s friend doesn’t know him, but he’s obviously popular enough that his university (probably in exchange for some extra credit since Kim skips so much) has him as a headliner for their open house. He even draws a good-sized crowd who seem very knowledgeable about his work not just randoms who are touring the school like Chay’s friend.

I’m sorry bowl cut, drumstick boy has the best reactions throughout this scene. During Wik’s performance, dude is rocking out, and his exuberant thumbs up to what Wik says kills me. He may not be as wild as Chay, but bro is a big Wik fan so I support him. In comparison, Chay is very calm and quiet while watching his idol. He only shows his emotions when he can’t answer the questions and rants about Wik’s MVs.

Kim comes off so cold throughout this scene. The look on his face after he finishes his bit and the MC comes back on stage is dead inside. He is done. He does not want to be here. He wants to go write some songs and add pictures to his conspiracy board. I’m not saying that Kim dislikes performing and being Wik, no. I just think Kim likes the music more than he likes the performance. The public persona of Wik definitely helps him stay away from Korn’s machinations, but I think if Kim could have his music without the people aspect of being a musician he would in a heartbeat. But he puts up with it to stay away from his father.

Chay knowing all of the answers and correcting people. The looks he give the people who answer instead of him is as close to murderous as he gets in this series. If not for the laws of this land and the fact that Porsche doesn’t let him have a knife, he would have stabbed a bitch.

Anyways, there’s my obsessive fan boy! I am not joking when I say Kim fell for him because of his obsessive stalker tendencies. And his friend hyping him up, saying he’ll get the next question, and even trying to get the MC to pick Chay when literally less than an hour ago he had no idea who Wik was or the scale of Chay’s obsession. Need me a friend like that.

Speaking of, the absolute change in Kim’s expression when Chay goes on his little tangent. Bro deadass finally had some life in his eyes. He is shook and falling in love all at the same time. MC has to nudge Kim to get him out of his heart eyes moment.

I maintain that if Kim hadn’t gone all Kimlock Holmes about Porchay being Porsche’s brother he still would have obsessed over the cute boy who has the same obsessive red flag as him. KimChay are freaks who love a bit of stalking.

Bowl Cut’s “Even I didn’t know that. Who the hell are you?” – bro does Wik only have obsessive fans? Also yes, fear Chay’s power Bowl Cut Boy.

I am not gonna lie Barcode towering over people around him is so funny to me. He is baby, but that baby is six feet tall.

Chay is so happy when Kim offers to give him something else!!

[chaifootsteps]

I have to apologize Chai, because I don't want to use your askbox as a way to talk to morons who don't understand how badly they just doxxed certain people.

The things I deleted off my blog were personal. Things like, selfies, my professional/private accounts, and whatnot. I'm not deleting my internet history or possible kinks because I do not give a fuck. I also changed my Tumblr name entirely and may or may not have stopped liking Chai's posts because I'm afraid of getting doxxed and harassed.

I've had death threats sent to me before in the past for completely unrelated things, and I've had to call the FBI for people stalking me and my boyfriend in the past. Some whackjob thought movies my partner made were "real" and knew our location and said my partner would "star in a real snuff film." I also have author friends who have been stalked and harassed by crazy fans of theirs.

Fun fact! One of my friends received a letter from the BTK Killer years ago from prison saying how he liked my friend's books. I do NOT fuck around with being doxxed and harassed.

You claim that "You're not dragging anyone into this" while you LITERALLY POSTED A SCREENSHOT OF OUR TUMBLR NAMES and said to "sniff around" our accounts for the crime of *checks notes* liking Chai's posts.

I had to call my therapist yesterday because this brought up bad memories, and this fandom has a bad habit of harassing and doxxing people they don't like, all for a creator who doesn't know or care that they exist.

I'm fine now, but I really wish you would take down that screenshot. It's a complete violation of privacy, and none of us, especially Ken (who you keep misgendering by the way), deserve to be harassed.

And we're not roaches. We're human beings with lives and only want to see justice for the people who Viv has hurt. I could give 2 fucks about her shows. I care more about real people. Chai, myself, and tons of others will never stop fighting for the justice that these people deserve.

And Chai? Unless screenshots of you grooming minors or your internet history comes up with real animal dick, I know you're not a pedo or zoo.

But Viv has tons of characters with animal dicks and named her rapist character after her beloved dead cat.... not mention the long history of pedophilia type shit in her work. Berghaus.

Also if you screenshot this to gloat? Make sure you post the whole thing, okay bud?

I'm so over all this shit, man.

They'd better screenshot the whole thing if they're going to. This fandom needs to realize there's a consequence to their playacting.

[the-catboy-minyan]

I feel like venting.

I have a chronic illness, I'm not going to share what it is, but it's partially influenced by stress (as in, getting stressed worsens my condition but it's not the only thing that affects it).

when 7/10 happened, it was a Saturday, I just had a really good week since it was Sukkot and I celebrated it with friends, I had my first date ever (kinda), I hanged out with my sibling and their friends in Dizingof Center, and I was about to have a relaxing weekend with my little brother while my parents go on a trip overseas.

then I got a call from my sibling.

apparently there were bombings all over Israel, I wasn't even that surprised, this wouldn't be the first time Hamas attacked on a holiday. my parent's flight got delayed but other than that it was fine. I have a friend that keeps Shabbat so I couldn't reach them for the entire day, and we were worried sick because they live in a more dangerous town. then I found out my parents are stuck overseas until the next weekend (they were only supposed to go for 3 days). then I learned about the kidnappings. and oh no are we in a war right now??? this isn't just a regular bombing spree (as depressing as that thought is)????

the stress really got to me, I got really sick, and couldn't go to work. a few days turned to a week, my parents got back, my sibling stayed weekends in the military due to increased workload. the week turned to two, my friend got kicked out of the house for a couple of weeks because their mom is a manipulative bitch. everyone in our friend group were looking for ways to help them, offering their place to stay and almost calling child support (they're still a minor), until their mom finally calmed down enough. then it became a month, I entered the hospital for some time, then back to house rest I went. then two months, then three.

I'm finally back to work but I'm still sick as fuck from everything, I can't open the news, I can't stay in the room if people talk about politics, I can't open most social media sites, every time I see the colors red green white and black I can feel my heart start racing, I don't have access to a therapist because they're all booked as fuck and expensive, even being on jumblr can get me too stressed sometimes and I had to mute all notifications from this blog.

why do I even have this blog then? because venting about the situation actually kinda helps, seeing support from diaspora jews and other israelis helps, and as much as I can't physically watch the news, I still want to be in the loop even slightly.

so yeah, am yisrael chai and stuff. I'm not saying this like "oh woe is me", I luckily haven't lost anyone in this war and the people I know who do have only lost distant relatives. it's not a "I'm literally neurodivergent and a minor" thing, I'm aware that just by having this blog I'm inviting hate to my front door, but if I'm ignoring instead of confronting hate well then now you know why.

I have no idea who this is going to reach, and I don't really care, I just wanted to get this off my chest. this war had affected my life so much even though I was never close to the front lines, the only thing I want is for it to end.