#central driving position

[carsthatnevermadeitetc]

Lotus Theory 1 Concept, 2024. The first example of The Lotus Theory, a new design manifesto that will form the foundation for all future Lotus cars. The car's wedge design clearly references Giugiaro's original Esprit concept from 1972 but has a dual-motor all-wheel drive powertrain that produces a total of 986hp. Inside the Theory 1 features 3 seats abreast and a central driving position with haptic feedback through the seats and steering wheel for a more visceral driving experience

[blujayonthewing]

my favorite type of characters are always sidekick type of characters so that's the only type of character I ever make but they still somehow KEEP... FUCKING.... ENDING UP IN CENTRAL/ LEADERSHIP/ FACE ROLES IN THE PARTY

[queen-scribbles]

#look I'm not saying they can't make it work but boy do they have their work cut out for them#at least let's hope it gets handled better than star wars

@prettypajamassuitedsoldier HARD agree

[esotericalchemist]

𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 - 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐫

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

In Vedic Astrology, Amatyakaraka is a significant planet that represents your career, ambitions, and professional path. It is determined by identifying the planet with the second-highest degree in your birth chart. This planet provides insights into your work, the kind of roles you are drawn to, and how you achieve success. Essentially, Amatyakaraka helps you understand your professional life, guiding you toward your ideal career and the path to fulfillment in your work and public life.

𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐎 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐈𝐓?

Amatyakaraka is found by looking at the planet with the second highest degree in your birth chart. The planets that can be your Amatyakaraka are: The Sun, Moon, Mars, Mercury, Jupiter, Venus, and Saturn. Rahu and Ketu are NOT considered.

Step 1: Convert the birth chart to Vedic/Sidereal.

Step 2: Find the planet with the second highest degree

Now that we have converted the birth chart to the sidereal system, we can identify the planet with the second highest degree. Remember, only the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn are involved. In the birth chart above, the planet with the second highest degree is Mercury.

NOW THAT YOU HAVE FOUND YOUR AMATYAKARAKA, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING!

☉︎ - 𝐒𝐮𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When the Sun is your Amatyakaraka, it indicates that your career is closely linked to leadership, authority, and personal expression. You’re likely drawn to roles where you can step into the spotlight, take charge, and make a significant impact. Whether it's through leadership positions, creative endeavors, or areas where recognition is key, your professional life is a stage for your unique talents and vision.

In your work, you naturally gravitate towards opportunities that allow you to lead and inspire. The Sun as your Amatyakaraka suggests that you thrive in environments where you can express your individuality and pursue goals that resonate with your sense of purpose. You’re driven by a need to make a meaningful contribution and to be recognized for your efforts.

Your path to success involves embracing roles that challenge your leadership abilities and allow you to shine. The energy of the Sun encourages you to approach your career with confidence and integrity, staying true to your personal values while taking on responsibilities that showcase your strengths.

Ultimately, with the Sun as your Amatyakaraka, your career isn't just about achieving success—it's about fulfilling your potential and making a lasting impact. Your work reflects your inner drive and desire to lead, guiding you toward roles where you can truly shine and inspire others along the way.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Leadership roles, politics, public speaking, entertainment (acting, directing), entrepreneurship, management, military officer, and diplomat.

☽︎ - 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When the Moon is your Amatyakaraka, your career is deeply connected to your emotional sensitivity, intuition, and ability to care for others. This placement suggests that you are naturally drawn to professions where empathy, understanding, and emotional support are central. You may find yourself thriving in fields such as healthcare, counseling, education, or any role that allows you to nurture and connect with others on a deeper level.

In your professional life, you excel in environments where you can create a sense of security and comfort, whether through direct care, creative expression, or providing emotional guidance. The Moon as Amatyakaraka encourages you to follow a career path that resonates with your inner emotional world and allows you to bring a sense of harmony and compassion to your work.

Your journey toward success will likely involve roles that require emotional intelligence and the ability to adapt to the needs of those around you. This placement emphasizes the importance of listening to your intuition and finding a career that aligns with your emotional values. You may find fulfillment in jobs that allow you to care for others, express creativity, or create environments where people feel safe and understood.

Ultimately, having the Moon as your Amatyakaraka means that your professional life is not just about achieving goals but about creating meaningful connections and making a positive emotional impact. Your work becomes an extension of your natural ability to nurture, providing you with a sense of purpose and satisfaction as you support others in their journey.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Counseling and therapy, nursing, childcare, teaching (especially early education), hospitality, writing (especially emotional or creative writing), social work, and interior design.

☿ - 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When Mercury is your Amatyakaraka, your career is strongly connected to communication, intellect, and adaptability. You're likely drawn to professions where quick thinking, problem-solving, and the exchange of ideas are essential. Whether it's through writing, teaching, technology, or any role that involves connecting with others through words and ideas, your professional life revolves around your mental agility.

In your work, you excel in environments that are dynamic and mentally stimulating. Mercury as your Amatyakaraka suggests that you thrive on variety and enjoy roles that require you to be flexible and resourceful. You’re driven by a curiosity to learn and a desire to share knowledge, making you a natural in fields that involve information, networking, or teaching.

Your path to success involves embracing opportunities that challenge your intellect and allow you to communicate effectively. The energy of Mercury encourages you to stay adaptable, to think on your feet, and to use your communication skills to navigate complex situations and connect with others.

Ultimately, with Mercury as your Amatyakaraka, your career is not just about what you do, but how you think and communicate. Your work reflects your intellectual curiosity and ability to adapt, guiding you toward roles where you can use your sharp mind and articulate ideas to make a meaningful impact.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Writing and journalism, teaching, communication specialist, marketing and advertising, public relations, editing and publishing, technology and software development, and sales.

♀ - 𝐕𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When Venus is your Amatyakaraka, your career is closely tied to beauty, relationships, and harmony. You’re naturally drawn to professions where aesthetics, creativity, and interpersonal connections play a significant role. Whether in the arts, fashion, design, or roles that involve diplomacy and relationship-building, your work reflects your love for balance and elegance.

In your professional life, you thrive in environments that allow you to express your creativity and cultivate beauty. Venus as your Amatyakaraka suggests that you excel in roles where you can create harmony, whether through artistic expression, fostering positive relationships, or enhancing the quality of life for others. You're driven by a desire to bring joy and pleasure into the world, often through your keen eye for aesthetics and your ability to connect with people.

Your journey to success involves embracing opportunities that allow you to showcase your creative talents and your ability to build meaningful relationships. The influence of Venus encourages you to pursue work that feels beautiful and fulfilling, where your contributions not only meet practical needs but also elevate the experience for others.

Ultimately, with Venus as your Amatyakaraka, your career is about more than just work—it's about creating beauty and harmony in everything you do. Your professional path reflects your deep appreciation for art, relationships, and the finer things in life, guiding you toward roles where you can make a positive impact through your unique sense of style and your ability to connect with others on a deeper level.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Art and design (fashion, interior, graphic), beauty industry (cosmetics, hairstyling), music and performance arts, event planning, relationship couseling, luxury goods sales, hospitality and tourism, and culinary arts (chef, sommelier).

♂ - 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When Mars is your Amatyakaraka, your career is driven by action, ambition, and a desire to conquer challenges. You're naturally drawn to roles where your energy, determination, and courage can shine. Whether in fields like entrepreneurship, sports, the military, or any profession that requires assertiveness and decisive action, your work reflects your dynamic and competitive nature.

In your professional life, you excel in environments that demand initiative and resilience. Mars as your Amatyakaraka suggests that you thrive on challenges and are motivated by the opportunity to achieve and overcome obstacles. You’re driven by a strong sense of purpose and a need to see tangible results from your efforts, often gravitating toward roles that allow you to take charge and make an impact.

Your path to success involves embracing roles that require strength, leadership, and the ability to take decisive action. The energy of Mars encourages you to pursue your goals with intensity and focus, using your natural drive to push through difficulties and achieve your ambitions.

Ultimately, with Mars as your Amatyakaraka, your career is about harnessing your passion and energy to achieve success. Your professional journey is marked by your ability to take bold steps, confront challenges head-on, and lead with confidence. Through your work, you channel your inner warrior, making a significant impact and achieving your goals with determination and strength.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Military and defense, law enforcement, sports and athletics, surgery, engineering (especially mechanical), firefighting, entrepreneurship, construction and architecture.

♃ - 𝐉𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When Jupiter is your Amatyakaraka, your career is deeply connected to wisdom, growth, and a sense of purpose. You’re naturally drawn to roles where teaching, guiding, or expanding knowledge plays a central role. Whether in education, law, spirituality, or any profession that involves mentoring and sharing wisdom, your work reflects your desire to inspire and uplift others.

In your professional life, you thrive in environments that allow you to explore big ideas and make a positive impact on the world. Jupiter as your Amatyakaraka suggests that you excel in roles where you can pursue truth, justice, and personal growth. You’re driven by a need to contribute to the greater good, often gravitating towards careers that involve helping others grow and expand their horizons.

Your path to success involves embracing opportunities that allow you to share your knowledge and inspire others. The influence of Jupiter encourages you to approach your career with optimism and a broad vision, always seeking to learn, teach, and contribute to the well-being of those around you.

Ultimately, with Jupiter as your Amatyakaraka, your career is not just about personal achievement but about making a meaningful contribution to society. Your professional journey is guided by your commitment to growth, both for yourself and for others, leading you toward roles where your wisdom and generosity can have a lasting impact.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Teaching and academia, law (judge, lawyer), religious or spiritual leadership, counseling and life coaching, writing (philosophy, self-help), foreign affairs and diplomacy, publishing, and humanitarian work.

♄ - 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚 ⋆˙⊹

When Saturn is your Amatyakaraka, your career is deeply tied to discipline, responsibility, and long-term commitment. You’re naturally drawn to roles that require perseverance, structure, and a strong work ethic. Whether in fields like management, engineering, government, or any profession that involves building and maintaining systems, your work reflects your dedication to creating stability and enduring results.

In your professional life, you excel in environments that demand patience and attention to detail. Saturn as your Amatyakaraka suggests that you are likely to thrive in careers where hard work and consistency are rewarded. You’re driven by a sense of duty and a desire to achieve mastery in your field, often gravitating towards roles that require careful planning, persistence, and the ability to handle significant responsibilities.

Your path to success involves embracing roles that require structure, discipline, and the ability to work within established frameworks. The influence of Saturn encourages you to take a measured, steady approach to your career, recognizing that true success comes from sustained effort and the ability to overcome obstacles over time.

Ultimately, with Saturn as your Amatyakaraka, your career is about building something lasting and meaningful through dedication and hard work. Your professional journey is marked by your commitment to achieving long-term goals and your ability to create stability and order in whatever you undertake. Through your work, you bring a sense of reliability and structure, making a lasting impact through your perseverance and wisdom.

Possible careers/areas you would excel in: Engineering (especially civil or structural), government and public administration, accounting and finance, law (especially corporate law), project management, real estate, agriculture and farming, quality control and auditing.

[kleopatra45]

Asteroid Pallas (2)

Asteroid Pallas (2) in astrology symbolizes strategic intelligence, problem-solving skills, and wisdom. Its placement in a birth chart indicates how one approaches challenges with foresight and analytical thinking. Pallas represents the ability to devise effective plans, negotiate, and find creative solutions. Understanding Pallas' position provides insights into one's strategic strengths, decision-making style, and leadership potential in various areas of life.

Pallas in the Houses

Pallas in the 1st House: This placement suggests that strategic thinking and problem-solving are integral to your identity and self-expression. You may approach life with a sense of strategy and foresight, and others may see you as someone who is wise and insightful. Pallas in the 2nd House: Values, resources, and personal possessions are important themes in your strategic approach. You may apply your intelligence and problem-solving skills to financial matters or to enhance your sense of security and stability. Pallas in the 3rd House: Communication, learning, and intellectual pursuits are emphasized in your strategic thinking. You may excel in fields that require logical analysis and clear communication. Siblings and neighbors may play a role in your strategic plans. Pallas in the 4th House: Family, home, and emotional security are central to your strategic approach. You may apply your intelligence to create a harmonious home environment or to resolve family conflicts. Real estate and property matters may interest you strategically. Pallas in the 5th House: Creativity, self-expression, and children (if applicable) are emphasized in your strategic endeavors. You may approach creative projects or hobbies with a sense of planning and purpose. Romantic relationships may involve strategic thinking and problem-solving. Pallas in the 6th House: Service, routines, and health are integral to your strategic approach. You may excel in organizing and optimizing daily tasks or in fields related to health and well-being. Your work environment may benefit from your strategic insights. Pallas in the 7th House: Partnerships, relationships, and collaborations are key areas of strategic focus for you. You may excel in negotiating and finding solutions that benefit both parties. Legal matters and contracts may interest you strategically. Pallas in the 8th House: Intimacy, shared resources, and transformation play significant roles in your strategic thinking. You may apply your intelligence to delve into deep psychological insights or to manage shared financial matters effectively. Crisis management may be an area of strength. Pallas in the 9th House: Philosophy, beliefs, and higher learning influence your strategic approach. You may excel in fields related to teaching, law, or philosophy, where strategic thinking and broad perspectives are valued. Travel and cultural exchanges may interest you strategically. Pallas in the 10th House: Career, public image, and achievements are important in how you express strategic qualities. You may apply your intelligence to leadership roles, long-term goals, or projects that enhance your professional reputation. Strategic planning may drive your career success. Pallas in the 11th House: Friendships, groups, and social causes are emphasized in your strategic endeavors. You may excel in organizing collective efforts, advocating for social justice, or leading community initiatives. Networking may be a strategic strength. Pallas in the 12th House: Spirituality, hidden strengths, and unconscious patterns influence your strategic thinking. You may apply your intelligence to explore metaphysical realms, psychoanalysis, or charitable endeavors behind the scenes. Healing and spiritual growth may be strategic goals.

Pallas in the Signs

Aries: Pallas in Aries strategizes with courage, initiative, and independence. You approach challenges with a direct and assertive style, often pioneering new paths and solutions. Taurus: Pallas in Taurus strategizes with patience, persistence, and practicality. You excel in planning for long-term stability and security, applying a methodical approach to achieve tangible results. Gemini: Pallas in Gemini strategizes with versatility, curiosity, and adaptability. You thrive on gathering information, brainstorming ideas, and finding innovative solutions through communication and networking. Cancer: Pallas in Cancer strategizes with empathy, intuition, and nurturing care. You excel in understanding emotional dynamics, nurturing relationships, and creating secure foundations for growth. Leo: Pallas in Leo strategizes with creativity, confidence, and leadership. You approach challenges with a bold and charismatic style, focusing on inspiring others and achieving recognition. Virgo: Pallas in Virgo strategizes with precision, analysis, and practical problem-solving. You excel in detail-oriented planning, organization, and implementing efficient strategies for improvement. Libra: Pallas in Libra strategizes with diplomacy, balance, and fairness. You excel in negotiating agreements, promoting harmony, and finding win-win solutions in partnerships and collaborations. Scorpio: Pallas in Scorpio strategizes with depth, insight, and transformative power. You approach challenges with strategic intensity, delving into hidden truths and leveraging psychological insights. Sagittarius: Pallas in Sagittarius strategizes with optimism, exploration, and philosophical insight. You excel in strategic planning that broadens horizons, promotes growth, and aligns with ethical principles. Capricorn: Pallas in Capricorn strategizes with ambition, discipline, and long-term vision. You excel in strategic planning that emphasizes responsibility, achievement, and building enduring structures. Aquarius: Pallas in Aquarius strategizes with innovation, humanitarianism, and progressive thinking. You excel in strategic planning that fosters social change, embraces diversity, and promotes collective goals. Pisces: Pallas in Pisces strategizes with compassion, imagination, and spiritual insight. You approach challenges with a strategic focus on healing, creativity, and transcending boundaries.

Pallas in Aspects

Conjunctions: A conjunction of Pallas with another planet intensifies the influence of that planet on your strategic thinking and problem-solving abilities. For example, Pallas conjunct Mercury emphasizes strategic thinking in communication and decision-making, while Pallas conjunct Mars highlights strategic actions and assertiveness. Sextiles and Trines: These harmonious aspects indicate ease and support in integrating the energies of Pallas and the other planet involved. For example, Pallas sextile Venus suggests strategic planning that enhances relationships and creative pursuits, while Pallas trine Jupiter indicates strategic growth and expansion through optimism and opportunity. Squares and Oppositions: These challenging aspects can indicate tension or conflict that needs to be addressed in strategic planning and problem-solving. For example, Pallas square Saturn might indicate challenges in implementing long-term strategies or facing limitations, while Pallas opposition Uranus could highlight a need to balance innovative thinking with practical considerations.

©️kleopatra45

[pprodsuga]

never to keep | heeseung

summary: heeseung was always a natural scene stealer, capturing the hearts and attention of those around him. it seemed predestined that he'd pursue a life that would take him beyond the cosmos and leave behind the constellations he once treasured. it's too bad that you were one of them.

warnings: angst and typos, probably.

word count: 8.6K (shorter than previous works, forgive me)

notes: ahahah. this is a therapy piece ... currently dealing with similar themes of a friend prioritizing work and people who don't care for her over people who do, and i feel veryyy conflicted as of late. i, like yn, am not a plaything. why not turn it into a fic. anyway, enjoy and happy reading! x

masterlist + taglist

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

If you love someone, they will always come back to you. 

There’s no logic in love, only strong emotions that make people disregard all they know to chase the feeling of reckless abandon. Love is a wildcard that can catch even the most self-protective person off guard. You’ve read it in stories from childhood fairytales to watching strangers fall in love in your favorite books and television shows growing up. You believe the people who kiss on the screen must surely find an ounce of love, even if only for a brief moment. 

It’s no surprise that you’ve come to love Heeseung the way you do. To love him is to know him, even if he’s too tired to see you on the weekends or too occupied to sit next to you at the lunch period because of his days training to become an idol. What you know at this point in your life is that love is unconditional; supporting your best friend to pursue a dream he’s talked about since he could speak feels right. 

To love somebody doesn’t necessarily mean to devote oneself to the fullest extent, but somehow you feel as though this way of thinking never quite aligned with how you’ve come to love. Heeseung’s parents are a surrogate for your own, especially when it’s just you and your mother in the small, two bedroom apartment that sits on the edge of town and away from the city. They tuck you in at night during holidays and other special occasions when you’ve become too tired to drive back to your home. 

Minjun, Heeseung’s younger sister by four years, warmed up to you quicker than anyone had expected. The fierce girl had a protective streak over her brother once he grew into his height and learned that winking at pretty girls could get them to do whatever he asked of them within reason. Minjun doesn’t recall when she met you for the first time because she was likely too young to remember, but her sweet nature towards you speaks louder than you could’ve ever anticipated. 

Growing up with a single parent as an only child provides enough time to befriend loneliness. There are days spent idly in the apartment waiting for someone to keep you company, often wishing that the house was filled with people to keep the void full and lively. But now, because of the Lee family and how close you’ve become to their two children, it seems as if the idea of a central family is closer than you think. 

Heeseung didn’t expect for you to become a prominent fixture in his life when the two of you were partnered for a science project at the ripe age of thirteen. He’d experienced a growth spurt and acne for the first time simultaneously, growing insecure in himself with every day that passed by. Heeseung hadn’t anticipated you sitting with his family at the dinner table five years later, listening to a mundane story about his mother’s workday at a boring corporate-level position Heeseung doesn’t bother to remember. 

He never thought you’d be cooking with his father in the kitchen upon returning home from his training practices, talking about the art of seasoning as the meal preparations come to a finish. He doesn’t remember when you started coming over without the pretense of coming to see him either. Heeseung surely does not anticipate Minjun waiting for your arrival by the front windows just to insist on being the first person who welcomes you into their home. 

Naturally, Minjun becomes a recognizable face in your life because of how often she spends time with you and Heeseung. The young girl sets up her homework as the two of you begin yours, her schoolbooks significantly lighter than yours but you make conversation anyhow. 

“I think she likes you because you don’t treat her like she’s thirteen,” Heeseung says as he dries the dishes from dinner as you scrub them clean. “She hates it when people baby her.” 

“Sometimes I think I need to watch how I talk to Minjun.”

“No, you don’t. Minjun likes that you talk to her like a friend.”

“That’s what she is, no? A friend?”

“More than me?”

You flick water towards Heeseung. “Yes, if you keep teasing me.” 

“Seriously, though. Thanks for being nice to her. She complains that she’s the youngest out of everybody all the time.”

“I used to be like that.” You close the tap water and hand the last dish to Heeseung. “I hated being at the kids table when everybody else got to be an adult. Minjun’s at the age where she’s aware of it.” 

“God, we sound like her parents, or something.”

You bite back a smile. 

Caring for Heeseung is arguably the easiest thing you’ve ever done. He makes it simple when you receive a text from him hours before you wake up and just before you go to bed despite his busy schedule. You wonder at all how he manages to fit you into his life with all of his dreams and responsibilities, but Heeseung always tells you it’s because there’s room for you. 

Being so close to his family helps internalize the fact that you are a permanent fixture in his life. Mrs. Lee drops off baked goods on Saturday mornings most times because she knows your mother likes to eat a sweet treat with her bitter coffee. Mr. Lee goes out of his way to fix faulty ceiling fans or kitchen drains when he has the time to spare your income. Minjun gives you drawings from her art classes that sit on your refrigerator. Integrating their life within yours feels natural. 

Heeseung has always been somebody you’ve looked up to, poised for success after deciding he loved singing enough to make a career out of it. The eight-year-old boy who loved to choreograph dance numbers to famous songs carries this humble beginning when he talks about what life might look like for him when he’s crossed the threshold that separates his life from now. 

It seemed as though Heeseung’s dream of becoming an idol never seemed too far out of reach, even if he had his moments where he felt like giving up. Things always worked out for him in ways nobody could explain, like moving to a new city because of his mother’s job and making friends within an hour of transferring to a new middle school. Or the time when he’d auditioned to train under a management company and hadn’t heard back from them for weeks–Heeseung prepared to stop giving himself false hope for his future as an idol until the fateful email sat at the top of his inbox, welcoming him to the company. 

Life was always easier on Heeseung than it was for everybody else. 

You don’t see him much between classes because he’s on a special path created for people who are like him. People who are destined to debut as an idol are given certain exemptions to ensure quality education while having enough time to train in all areas of performance art. It took a while for Heeseung to get used to his new life and the new routine set in place for him but you were always there to remind him that this is what he wants more than anything in the world. All of the stress and frustration that comes with change, no matter how brutal or unnerving, will be worth it when he sees his dream to the end. 

You’re a young adult at this point in your life but it feels like you’ve aged beyond your peers because of circumstance. Spending time at the Lee residence when your mom’s at work or visiting her friends prevents you from feeling as lonely as you do in between four white walls that barely feel like home without someone else in it. Growing up quicker than your peers feels like something expected of you. Oftentimes, you wish you could maintain childlike innocence as Heeseung does, dreaming so big and far that everything seems like a possibility if you dreamed hard enough. 

Watching him dance and hearing him sing feels like a reminder that there’s more to life than what you know. Your best friend is your confidant and the person you see yourself in the most. The boys and girls who befriend him because of his good looks and potential stardom don’t matter much to either of you when the promise of lifelong friendship looms in the future. You can’t imagine Heeseung not being in it. 

Mr. and Mrs. Lee sit at the dining table over a cup of post-dinner coffee while Minjun scrolls through her phone by the couch with a Netflix show you’ve never heard of on the television. Their soft murmurs have become a familiar background noise. You sit next to Minjun and peer over her shoulder. 

“I like these shoes a lot,” she tells you as she turns the phone for you to see. “All the girls in my grade are wearing these.” 

“Do you like them because you like them or because everyone else does?” 

She frowns. “What’s wrong with liking what other people like?” 

“Nothing, but if you’re going to buy flats just for them to sit in the back of your closet, that doesn’t seem like a good reason to have them.” 

Minjun has approached the age you’re all too familiar with. When you turned thirteen, the impending doom of fitting in hit you like a truck when you realized all of the girls in your grade had expensive clothes while you wore hand-me-downs from your cousins. Your backpack, which you had been using for three years because the straps weren’t broken, felt like a burden to carry when everybody else had pretty satchels. You felt juvenile in your too-worn sneakers and the two pairs of jeans you had sitting in your closet. But you were thirteen and your mother made enough money to make ends meet and put dinner on the table. Clothing and new school materials didn’t matter compared to eating before bed. 

Part of this insecurity has always followed you throughout childhood, especially when you were old enough to be aware of the fact that you were one of the few people in your grade who didn’t have a nuclear family. The kinds of families you’d see on the television didn’t exist in real life because while these programs taught its audiences the value of a good, stable home life, you’d been watching them alone while you waited for your mother to come home from work. There would be no dinner at the table with both of your parents because you knew there would be just her.

Watching Minjun grow up with two parents who dote on her feels bittersweet. It feels like watching a version of what could have been if only your father had chosen to stay in the picture instead of abandoning his family for a promising career in entertainment. Minjun’s petulance often reminds you that you were not privileged enough to have this kind of grace because of how rapidly your circumstances forced you to grow up faster than your peers did. 

There’s a small part of you that envies her life when you think about what yours could have been if he had stayed. Maybe you wouldn’t have had to watch your mother slave away at odd jobs to keep the lights on before finding a good, stable job after years of searching. Maybe you wouldn’t have felt so lonely in your adolescence because he’d take you to ice cream after school. Maybe the hollowness that remains inside of you would have been filled with joy and laughter on the holidays. 

“You’re right,” Minjun sighs, pulling you out of your thoughts. “Seri told me my outfit would’ve looked prettier if I wore these.” 

“People should keep their opinions to themselves.” 

Minjun nods. “Agreed.” 

Heeseung emerges from the kitchen a moment later and sits next to you on the couch. The dip in the cushion and his thigh being pressed against yours isn’t a new phenomenon, but the heat that creeps up your neck can’t be helped when he looks like a model from the corner of your eye. You swallow until your mouth feels dry to keep both Lee siblings from asking why you look like you’re about to explode. 

It’s easy to fall in love with Heeseung. All of the girls fawn over him already, a promising sign that Heeseung will likely be just fine when he debuts as an idol. He’s always been good with people and speaks in a way that makes people root for his success even if it was unintentional to begin with. He’s charming in a way that seems humble. Heeseung has a skill for making you feel like you are the only person in the room when he talks to you. You’re sure it’s why people feel drawn to him and why everybody loves being around Heeseung so much. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel the same way. 

Sometimes, you grow envious of how easy it is for Heeseung to get people to like him. Career prospects aside, it’s almost as if he can convince anyone he’s somebody worth being friends with. Cashiers love him because he doesn’t make small talk awkward. He’s not afraid to talk to strangers and strike up a conversation with somebody while waiting for his coffee order. Heeseung is bashful enough to come across as sincere and it seems to reel people in. 

He inspires you in ways that you can’t fathom but simultaneously reminds you that you’ve got no future or prospect. It’s unfair to compare yourself to your best friend, but being in such close proximity where people praise him next to you are constant reminders that your life hasn’t begun and you don’t know if it ever will. Your life feels stagnant compared to his exciting one. While Heeseung spends his days and nights perfecting his dance techniques and vocal skills, you sit in your room and wonder what life would be like if you could touch the moon. 

There are days where you wish you could be as suave and charming as he can be. You feel awkward around people you don’t know and limit yourself to new experiences when it feels too intimidating. You’re not somebody who’s confident enough to start a conversation, let alone with somebody you aren’t familiar with. Where Heeseung excels in the socializing department, you find yourself playing catch-up every time you see him befriend yet another person you aren’t familiar with. It’s a wonder how you two became as close as you are.

Meeting him had been by chance. You knew him from friends of friends and saw him in the hallways between class periods but never had a reason to talk to him until the two of you were partnered for a class project. The newfound partnership felt oddly comfortable from the minute Heeseung introduced himself to you with that same charming smile everyone knows him to have. His wit and humor brewed the perfect potion for you to feel like caring for him as deeply as you do would become inevitable. It wasn’t a bet on if you would fall for him as hard as you did, but when. 

You’re inclined to believe you keep it hidden well. Heeseung is far too oblivious most times to see you as anything other than his best friend. You’ve treated him like a friend far longer than you’ve liked him romantically, so acting as if you don’t have feelings for him is easy when you remind yourself that having him in your life would be better than the alternative. Still, you have moments where you yearn to hold his hand and kiss him before he leaves for practice. 

“Do you want to come to the next showcase this weekend?” Heeseung asks, nudging your side with his elbow. You pry your attention away from Minjun’s phone to look at him. “It’s gonna be a small one in the company theater. There’s going to be a bunch of important people in the industry. Allegedly.” 

“Of course I’ll come, Heeseung. This is you we’re talking about. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 

The smile he gives you is blinding. 

“I really appreciate you supporting me, you know that? I don’t say it often, but I should. Thank you for always supporting me.” 

Your heart bursts. 

“I wouldn’t be your best friend if I didn’t do at least that,” you tell him. 

“My parents and Minjun are gonna be there too so you won’t be alone.” He smiles at you like he knew you were worried about who to sit with, let alone if there’s going to be important people that could determine Heeseung’s career. 

“Thanks,” you mumble, an overwhelming feeling of shyness overtaking you. “It’s silly that you have to look out for me all the time.” 

“No, not silly,” he says immediately, pushing his head to your shoulder. You don’t imagine this position is very comfortable for him, but Heeseung seems keen on staying in this position. “We’re kids, Y/N. You don’t need to have your life together. I’ll always look out for you and walk you through it if that’s what you need.” 

You sigh. “You know, one day, you’re going to become so famous that you’ll inevitably be too busy for me.”

Heeseung shakes his head. “No I won’t. Who checks up on me every day after practice? Who do I come to when I need to cry? Who do I invite to my home when I’m not even here?”

“Technically, your parents invite me over when you’re not here.” 

Heeseung pinches your thigh. “I’m serious, Y/N. You’re not getting rid of me. It’s like, scientifically impossible to separate the two of us.” 

“Thanks, Hee.” You feel him nod against you before he lifts his head from your shoulder. “I just feel like I get in my own head sometimes. You know what you want to do for the rest of your life and I barely know what I want for breakfast tomorrow.” 

“We don’t always have to figure it out. I know saying that feels like bullshit because I’m training to become an idol but I’m serious. There are so many people we know who don’t know what they’re doing with their lives.” 

“It feels like my life could very well be over.”

“You’re being dramatic.” 

You make a face at him. “I know.” 

“You’ll find something for you, okay? You’re barely an adult anyway. You still have college and all of that shit to figure it out.” 

“You’re right.” 

“As always.” 

“Don’t push it, Heeseung.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Mr. and Mrs. Lee drive you to the showcase. They pick you up and the four of you have a quick dinner before heading over to the company’s theater and you feel somewhat like an important industry person when you’re given a badge with ‘VIP’ on it to signify that you’re part of the family and friends entourage. You see a group of people with clipboards and pens at the ready, dressed like they’ve just come from important meetings that determine the futures of each trainee. Perhaps that’s who they are. Some of these well-dressed individuals have younger people standing beside them, presumably assistants or something as such. 

It feels very formal and you’re wondering if the long skirt and long sleeve top you’re wearing is too childish. Everybody who looks important seems to be donning suits or dresses that make them look like they stepped out of a drama show. It doesn’t matter how many times you remind yourself that you’re young and not here to mingle with corporate executives. You still feel like the floor should swallow you whole and spit you out with a new wardrobe that matches everyone else’s. 

Heeseung’s parents chat with a few people they recognize and leave you and Minjun to fend for yourselves (or, rather, it feels that way). The young girl beside you hooks her arm with yours when you’ve been quiet for a moment too long and starts to lead you down the aisles. 

“Everyone in here looks so stuffy,” she whispers. “People working in entertainment should look like they’re having fun.” 

“I feel a little silly in this skirt,” you admit.

“You look great,” Minjun tells you as she bumps your hip with hers. “My mom made me wear this stupid dress that I can barely breathe in.” 

“I happen to think you look very cute, Minnie.” 

“But I don’t want to look cute,” she whines quietly. “I want to look like an adult.” 

“Yeah, well you can look like an adult when you are one. For now, just be happy that somebody finds you cute enough to do things for you.” 

Minjun wants to argue but doesn’t. In the time that she’s known you, there hasn’t been a reason for her to distrust anything you say to her because you’ve never had a reason to lie. It’s why she’s likely to listen to you over her own brother, a fact that Heeseung holds a mild grudge over. 

“I guess you’re right. I can’t even drive. I need people to drive me places.” 

You stifle a laugh. “Yeah, driving can be a pain sometimes. Enjoy your youth while you have it, okay?” Minjun rolls her eyes in a way that lets you know she’s joking. Being outwardly affectionate doesn’t seem to run in the Lee sibling genes, but you’d like to think you know them well enough to tell when they’re being genuine.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say.” 

You try to tell yourself that, too. When everybody finds their seats and when the showcase begins, you’re in awe of how many talented people there are in the room when you hear their incredible vocal abilities and make performing in front of a crowd look easy. It’s easy to spot Heeseung when he’s dancing with a group of people you’ve never seen before. He always looks as if he’s floating on air, moving his body in ways you can’t fathom and he makes learning difficult choreography seem like a walk in the park. You’ve heard him sing before but not to this extent. The steady tone he delivers when he dances amazes you beyond comprehension and Minjun would later swear that she saw stars in your eyes when you watched her brother perform like this for the first time. 

What Heeseung neglected to tell you was that he secured a solo spot after months of impressing his coaches. He performs one of his favorite songs and moves across the stage like he was always meant to be dancing on it. From here, Heeseung looks like a celestial being with the lights cascading down his body. You hold your breath the entire time he sings on that stage and clap the loudest when everybody gives him a standing ovation. You peek to the side to see the same, stuffy executives nodding after his performance and write down things on their clipboards that you can only hope are praises and nothing but. 

Heeseung’s parents make their way to the front of the stage when the house lights turn on. They talk to people you don’t recognize and you find yourself following them instead of looking like an awkward mess, as everybody else has chosen to stand from their seats and greet the performers that have come out from backstage. 

Your best friend looks magnificent with his makeup and the outfit he last performed in. He looks like a real idol in this light and pride swells within your chest when people applaud him for his incredible performance before he reaches you. His smile turns bigger when he sees you and Minjun approaching him behind his parents and makes his way to engulf you in a hug. 

“You’re here,” he breathes. 

“I’d always said I’d be here for you, didn’t I?”

“I think this was the most important showcase of my life.” 

It would be hard to ignore Heeseung’s arm wrapped around your waist like he’s done it a thousand times before. It’s true that the two of you aren’t strangers to physical touch, but he never lingers on you like he is now. Still, you chalk it up to overflowing happiness and you can sense that Heeseung is genuinely pleased with himself. He isn’t pretending that he performed well like he does when he avoids going home after practice in lieu of spending time with you in your mother’s apartment. 

“You’re fucking incredible,” Minjun praises. 

“Language,” Heeseung chides, removing his arm from your waist to pinch her cheek. “Thank you for coming too. Where are eomma and appa?” 

Minjun points to where they are. “I think they were waiting for you to come out and started talking to the coaches.” 

“We should make our way there.” 

“You should,” you tell him, pushing Heeesung towards his parents. “I’ll be here when you’re done.” 

“Nonsense.” Heeseung shakes his head and grabs your wrist as best as he can with multiple bodies trying to squeeze past the three of you. 

When Heeseung pulls you away, you’re sure to grab onto Minjun’s hand so she doesn’t get lost in a sea of people either. Mr. and Mrs. Lee beam when they see their son approaching and Heeseung drops your wrist in favor of being smothered with affection by his parents. You can tell he feels embarrassed to be doted on in front of his peers because of how his ears are turning red, but you sit back and laugh with Minjun when she points it out loud. 

You let them talk and watch as people clad in business attire approach Heeseung and his parents. You're not sure if Heeseung knows them or not but he smiles and shakes their hands, going so far as to bow to their assistants as well. He talks to them like he’s been in this business for decades, making people laugh and remaining as humble as ever when people praise his performance skill. You’re not sure how Heeseung handles all of this attention and praise at the same time, or even what it must feel like to be talented enough to have people approach you. 

As you observe everybody else, it’s clear that Heeseung is the star of tonight’s showcase. The other performers did a fantastic job as well, but something about your best friend draws executives to him, and you’re sure everyone who hasn’t spoken to Heeseung is waiting for their turn. It feels exhausting to watch people socialize. You can only guess how exhausted Heeseung might be. 

Minjun joins her parents a little while later at their request, leaving you alone for the time being. You pull your phone out and text your mom that you’re still at the showcase and will let her know when Mr. and Mrs. Lee drive you back to the apartment. You use this as an excuse to look busy, replying to a few friends that you didn’t have time to respond to before coming to the showcase. But those conversations are dry and leave you without a distraction. 

“Y/N, come here!” 

Heeseung calls your name and your head snaps to where he’s standing. He beckons you over with a wave and you awkwardly waddle to where he’s standing. His family aren’t with him and you wonder just how long you’ve been looking at your phone for. 

“This is my best friend, Y/N,” Heeseung says as he pulls you closer to him. “Y/N, meet Kim Namjoon. He’s the president and founder of Big Hit.”

“It’s lovely to meet you.” The bow is almost automatic and you’re sure to put on a good first impression to help any reputation Heeseung has with Namjoon. You bow at an angle that’s deeper than a common greeting but just shy of ninety-degrees. 

Namjoon returns in kind. “Nice to meet you, Y/N. Heeseung’s a talented one, isn’t he?” 

“He’s the best at what he does,” you say earnestly. “I’ve never seen anybody work as hard as him in my entire life. Pardon if I’m overstepping, but I think Big Hit is incredibly lucky to have him.” 

He laughs at your politeness. “I feel the same. It’s not every day you come across someone who’s skilled at, well, everything.” 

“You know, when Heeseung and I were younger, we had this ongoing joke that he could master anything on the first try. I think it’s what makes him special, you know?”

“Guys, please don’t talk about me like I’m not here,” Heeseung whines. His cheeks are red but both you and Namjoon laugh in good fun.

“There’s a reason why I chose Heeseung to be tonight’s soloist,” Namjoon informs. “This showcase is meant for people in the industry and if I’m being honest with you, I think you’ll be getting good remakes on your review.” 

Heeseung beams. “Wow…I don’t know what to say.”

“He says ‘thank you,’” you answer for him. “I can’t imagine what training must be like but I do know that all of it has paid off. Thank you for giving Heeseung a chance to prove himself.” 

There’s a glint in Namjoon’s eye. 

“Have you ever considered working in publicity?” Namjoon asks you. 

“No, why do you ask?”

“I think you’d have a real talent for it.” Namjoon says it in a way that feels too casual for a showcase, especially if he’s the one in charge of the company Heeseung is training under. “You speak well for Heeseung.” 

“Oh…thank you.” 

He turns to Heeseung and claps him on the back. “There’s more to being an idol than training and performing. You need people who know you and know the business. It’s important to make your career thrive because you can be the most talented person in the world, but if you don’t have the right people around you, none of that will matter.” 

Heeseung nods. “Y/N’s always been my champion.” 

“I can see.” Namjoon smiles at you. “Entertainment is not for the faint of heart and there’s more to it than being photographed. You need to be in the right places at the right time and know the right people who can get you there. That’s what publicity does for you. Y/N’s already doing it and she’s not working in entertainment yet.” 

Somehow, his words feel comforting. “I haven’t thought about what I want to do with my life but that seems like something I could do.” 

“It’s important work. Heeseung can perform the shit out of his solo but it doesn’t mean anything if he has nowhere to perform it.” 

Namjoon smiles at the both of you before his name is being called from behind him. 

“Great job on your solo, Heeseung.” He turns to you. “It was nice to meet you, Y/N.” He bows once more to the both of you before departing. 

“I feel like I’m buzzing,” Heeseung says as he puts an arm loosely around you. “It was like I was the only person in the room when I was performing, you know? The dance with the other guys was amazing and all of that but I feel like I was on another level when it was just me up there.” 

“You were incredible, Hee. I mean that. I don’t know a single person more talented than you.” 

Heeseung smiles down at you. 

“You know, it means a lot that you come to see me. Sometimes I wonder if people talk to me because they know I’m training to become an idol but you never make me feel like that. It feels natural and genuine. So, I guess what I’m trying to say is, thanks.” 

You push him away from you, a giddy smile tugging on the edge of your lips. Heeseung is affectionate but less so in his vocabulary, choosing to tease you because it’s his way of letting you know he cares for you. Hearing him be so open and vulnerable tugs at your heartstrings and it makes you feel like you could achieve anything. 

“I’ll always be here for you, remember? You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Heeseung’s life changes for the better after the night of the showcase when Namjoon tells him he’s secured a debut spot underneath their brand new label, Belift. Happiness flows within the Lee household and you’re nearly in tears when you realize all your best friend has worked for has finally paid off. 

But with it comes uncertainty and your fears are slowly becoming a reality when Heeseung stops talking to you as frequently as he used to. 

It comes with the job and you’re more than aware of how much Heeseung has on his plate between preparing for his debut and trying to fit in with the industry. You can’t imagine what life must be like for him now that his dream is just a few weeks away of becoming a reality but part of you wonders if it’s too difficult for him to keep you hanging on a leash. 

He calls his parents and Minjun as often as he gets. You know because Minjun swings by your mother’s apartment with Mrs. Lee on Saturday mornings to drop off baked goods, updating you on the latest she’s heard from her older brother. You try your best to quell your jealousy because they’re his family after all, but part of you feels like you have a right to call yourself his family too after all he said to you during the night of the showcase and all you’ve done for him. 

You’re sure Mr. and Mrs. Lee can sense it too. Heeseung no longer lives at home, having moved into his own dorm in the heart of Seoul, thirty minutes from you. You aren’t a stranger to their household without his presence but you’ve gradually stopped coming by unless Minjun calls you from Mrs. Lee’s phone to ask you to hang out. 

Texts and calls slowly diminish with his new line of work. You went from hearing from him every day to every other day, to nothing at all.

Seeing the blue delivered messages without any indication that he’s acknowledged you, makes you feel like a second priority. But you don’t know if you get the right to feel like this when you know how busy he is and the weight of his debut. Heeseung’s got one shot to make a good first impression and the last thing you want is to distract him from achieving his childhood dream of being a successful idol. 

Still, the silence stings.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

Heeseung knows you’re waiting on him and ignores the pit in the bottom of his stomach that tells him to text you back. 

His new life has changed in ways he couldn’t fathom. When Namjoon told him the news about his debut and all of the details surrounding it, Heeseung felt as if the weight of the world was no longer a burden for him to carry, and that all he has ever wanted would eventually come to fruition. His new friends, namely the three guys around his age who have trained to become musicians, are people he gets along with more than he thought he would. Heeseung’s newfound excitement about the next chapter of his life takes him to new heights and he finds himself spending more time with Jay, Jake, and Sunghoon as they prepare for the debut showcase. 

Heeseung knows you’re waiting for him back at home but it’s so hard to focus on you when he’s wrapped up in his new life. Making time to see you is hard enough as it is and he knows you’re as patient as can be. In the years he’s been friends with you, Heeseung knows that your resilience knows no bounds and all that you’ve experienced in your lifetime has built the strong-willed, confident person he knows you to be. 

But his new life gets him caught up in the feeling of the present success. The three guys have known each other far longer than Heeseung has known them, only greeting each other in passing since all four of them were training in different areas of performance art. It wasn’t until they were living together that Heeseung started befriending them beyond practice and rehearsals. Jake’s the one who includes Heeseung the most on group outings or spending time playing video games in the living room. His entire life he’s been alone or with just you, seldom having a group of guys who just gets him. 

Heeseung tucks away the nagging feeling in the back of his head when he and Jay are preparing a meal for the four of them when he sees a text from you. 

hey hee, are you busy right now? it’s been a while since we hung out and i thought it would be nice to go get boba, or something. my treat !! <3

He shoves his phone in his back pocket before Jay can notice him staring at the screen. The message goes unanswered for the rest of the night as he basks in the company of his friends-slash-coworkers, the thought of getting boba with you far removed from his mind. Playing video games and getting to know the people he’ll likely be working with for the foreseeable future takes precedent. It’s what Heeseung keeps telling himself. 

After a while, the guilt no longer eats him alive. You’re busy focusing on graduating and preparing to attend university in the fall while he’s made his debut with his newfound best friends. It’s no surprise to anyone that Heeseung’s fanbase grows at a nearly alarming rate after he makes his debut. He grows popular with each day that passes and it feels like Heeseung has become the face of the newest generation overnight. 

He’ll wonder what you’re up to from time to time and let you know how he’s doing. Heeseung first sends a text to apologize, lying about not seeing your text sooner and that he’d love to get boba with you when he has the time. You tell him not to worry because you know he’s busy. He texts you pictures of his first performance and scenic pictures of the cities he visits because of his travel and promotion schedule. You update him on the end of the school year and how your mother is dealing with you moving away for college. 

The texts become sparse as the two of you resume your separate lives and Heeseung doesn’t realize that you don’t text him until the day of your graduation–the day that he was supposed to graduate if he hadn’t deferred to the trainee program–wishing him well and that you’re thinking of him. You send a video of yourself pulling your tassel over the graduation cap and he feels nothing for the lost time when he’s on his way to promote his first album overseas.

It’s for my career, he tells himself when he realizes how much time has passed since he thought of you. I’m doing what’s best for me and everybody else needs to get used to it.

It isn’t until Heeseung is permitted a few days off that he comes home per his parents’ request. He doesn’t tell them that he’s a bit homesick even though his dorm is a thirty minute drive, but it feels oceans away when his days are packed from morning until night. He tells his parents about his travels and what kinds of food he’s been eating when he’s overseas. Heeseung gifts Minjun all of the trinkets and souvenirs he bought from his time promoting his album, and what his future holds for him when he returns to his life as an idol. Mr. and Mrs. Lee applaud their son’s hard work, yet they can’t help but feel like there’s a piece of a puzzle missing because you aren’t here to celebrate with them. 

You make a visit at Minjun’s request. When you arrive, you’re stunned to learn that Heeseung is back at home and only has the evening until he needs to return to work. Heeseung can see the disappointment that festers in your eyes and the way your shoulder droops as you smile at him for his family’s sake, although he knows it’s false bravado because your grin doesn’t quite reach your eyes.

 He leads you upstairs to his bedroom when Mr. Lee insists that the two of you spend some time together after not having seen each other in ages. It feels awkward to be in his childhood bedroom with the door just slightly ajar at this moment, but it isn’t anything completely new.

What is new, however, is seeing that you’ve dyed your hair a different color and that you’ve gotten your ears pierced.

“You look good,” he says, lifting his hand to toy with the end of your hair. “It matches your skin tone nicely.” 

“Thanks.” 

“Did you do it recently? It looks fresh.” 

You don’t note that Heeseung also has a different hair color than his natural jet black. 

“Two weeks ago. My cousin did it for me.” 

He nods. “Nice. It looks good. I see that you’re wearing necklaces too.” 

“Yeah. I decided it was time to stop being a child and get it over with.”

“You know, you don’t have to do things if you don’t want to.” You throw a pointed look at Heeseung and it’s an expression he’s unfamiliar with. 

“I know. But I like earrings and that’s why I wanted to get them pierced.” 

Heeseung wipes his hand on his pants at the awkward tension in the room. He knows he’s to blame. His schedule and priorities have pulled him away from you and the life he’s built prior to debuting, but can anyone blame him? Can anyone blame him for not being able to balance his life when he’s been given the keys to a new empire? 

“Well, it was nice seeing you.” You throw a cheap smile in his direction and motion to open the door until Heeseung grabs your wrist, causing you to turn around. 

“You’re leaving?” 

“Yeah,” you nod. “You have an early day tomorrow.” 

Heeseung sharks his head. “It’s fine. I don’t have to be back in Seoul until ten anyway. I’ve missed you and I want to spend time with you before I absolutely have to fall asleep.” 

You scoff. “That’s real funny, Heeseung. You missed me but all of my texts and calls go unanswered.”

He frowns. “You know that I’m busy most days.” 

“And nights?” 

“I’m with the guys back at the dorm.” 

You poke your cheek with your tongue. 

“See, I would know all of this if you bothered to talk to me at all but it sees that your new life is treating you just fine.” 

You make another move to leave his room but he closes the door, startling you with the loud noise. He apologizes quietly and uses his body to block you from leaving for the time being. 

“I’m sorry, I’ve just been so busy between promotion and rehearsal that it’s hard to keep track of who I keep up with and who I don’t.” 

“You’re talking to me like I’ve never seen you cry before,” you say with a disappointed sigh. “You act like I’m somebody you once knew in a past life.” 

“Not true. You’re my best friend.” 

“Best friends would bother to talk to each other. You know that, right? I don’t exist just so you can pick and choose when you need somebody to talk to. It makes me feel like you don’t actually care about me, Heeseung. It makes me feel like you’ve ever cared about our friendship unless you needed a shoulder to cry on and I was the first person who would listen to you.”

“That’s not true. I’m just busy.”

“I get that, I really do. But it’s been months, Heeseung. I know that I can’t have your attention all the time and I know I can’t see you as often as I did. But would it kill you to let me know you’re alive? The only time I hear about you is when other people talk about you or when I see you on billboards. That doesn’t feel like a friendship to me.”

His fists ball at his side and his frustration surfaces. Heeseung is frustrated at everyone–himself for being unable to say ‘no’ to his new friends, you for expecting so much of him, and his company for keeping him as busy as he is. But he doesn’t know how to communicate that, not when you’re standing in front of him, looking like he’s the villain in your life when he feels like he’s not. 

“Well that’s life, Y/N,” Heeseung settles. “Sometimes we need to learn when to prioritize things over others.” 

You laugh humorlessly. “Is that the hill you’re going to die on? You’re too busy to send a simple text back or let me know that you’re, I don’t know, okay?”

“You can’t be a priority all the time.”

“I know that. I’m not asking you to drop everything for me just because I called you. I’m asking you to treat me like somebody you care about, Heeseung. Is that too much to ask?” 

The anger Heeseung feels within him feels misplaced, but your inability to hear him about makes him even angrier. It’s unfair for you to demand such things of him when he’s pursuing everything he’s ever dreamed of.

“Yes, it is too much to ask,” Heeseung bites back. “You don’t understand the gravity of what I do for a living and it’s hard to appreciate it when you’re breathing down my neck. God, when did you become such a clingy person, Y/N? The world doesn’t revolve around you and I don’t owe you shit just because you can’t handle that I’m busier than you are.” 

“You’re kidding me, right?” 

“I’m being dead serious.” Heeseung steps away from the door. “You of all people know how badly I want this and now it’s like you’re not letting me enjoy what I’ve worked for. What kind of friend does that make you?” 

The words tumble out of his mouth before he can catch them. His need to be the victim in an uncertain period of his life causes him to misdirect his frustration with adapting to his new life and the proof is written all over your face. 

“Y/N, I didn’t mean–”

“Don’t,” you say sharply. “Just don’t.”

Frozen, Heeseung watches you open his door with such force that it nearly slams into him. He’s quick on his feet to follow you downstairs where he sees his family looking perplexed when you’ve opened the front door without saying goodbye. 

“Y/N, I didn’t mean it!” Heesueng yells when you’ve crossed the threshold of his household. “Please come back inside.”

“You made it very clear that I have no place in your new life. Congratulations, I hope you’re happy.” 

You walk away while the deep feelings of disappointment and uncertainty settles in Heeseung’s chest. He walks back inside and closes the door behind him to see Minjun and his parents in a deep stupor, trying to make sense of the scene that has just unfolded before them. 

“What happened?” Mrs. Lee asks. 

“Y/N and I…” his voice cracks. “I don’t think we’re friends anymore.” 

The room is silent, save for the ticking of the wall clock. 

“Maybe it’s for the best,” Minjun says without a smile. 

Heeseung wants to tell her that she’s wrong and whatever conversation they must’ve heard was a product of two friends having their first serious argument. Heeseung’s own frustrations towards his new life is something he doesn’t talk about often because he’s worked so hard to become the person he is, and it would be ungrateful to complain about what he has yearned for his entire life. It bottled up so much that hearing you accuse him of being a poor friend caused him to unravel and say things he doesn’t mean. 

Mrs. Lee beats him to speaking.

“Don’t say that, Minjun.” 

The young girl remains quiet and refuses to meet Heeseung’s eye.

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ

In the few years that follow, you resist rolling your eyes when you see Heeseung’s face in magazine ads and billboards across the city. Life takes you to university where you spend the next four years deciding on the rest of your life before you settle on something everybody said you’d be good at. 

Graduation approaches far sooner than you’d like and it becomes bittersweet when you see the Lee family, sans Heeseung, in the stadium next to your mom, who are all equally shedding tears as your name is called. Heeseung being absent feels hollow, like another reminder that people choose to leave your life without a moment’s notice but for the sake of keeping up appearances, you smile at the camera when you accept your diploma. 

It’s not a surprise to you when you find yourself working in entertainment like Kim Namjoon said you could all those years ago. 

A job is a job, but he was right when he told you this would be something you’d excel at. Day in and day out, your responsibilities differ as you begin working at Hybe, formerly Big Hit, to manage the profiles and public appearances of idols and other public figures alike. 

Heeseung doesn’t hear from you much. His parents update him on your coursework and send him photos of you at graduation. He cries every so often when he feels the urge to call you and tell you about his day, but doesn’t know whether he has the right to do that anymore. The years in his position has taught him what true life balance is, especially with the media and paparazzi taking an interest in his personal life. 

It feels so exhausting to have nobody you can depend on. These days, it’s just him and the three boys he met at the beginning of his career. Heeseung’s popularity has grown so much that he can’t tell up from down. It drowns him in a way he never anticipated and the politics of fame and the industry wasn’t something he accounted for when he began dreaming about a career in the performance space. 

Perhaps it’s why he spends his days feeling listless, like he’s got no real potential after achieving his dream. He knows his managers worry for his health and that the other trainees in the building can sense something has been off for a while. Maybe it’s why he roams the halls with headphones on to drown out the noise that’s become his everyday life, with talks of meetings and promotions and everything Heeseung wishes to get away from, if for only one day.

When Heeseung bumps into somebody on his way out of the company elevator, his first instinct is to lean down to collect the papers that have fallen haphazardly on the floor. He pushes his headphones until they rest around his neck and stands to hand them back to the person he bumped into. Only, he feels his body freeze when he sees who it is. 

Like Heeseung has always believed, if you really love someone, they will always come back to you. 

“Y/N?”

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ 

potential part two ft. the rest of enha … this was a therapy piece lol

*✧･ﾟ─────────── *✧･ﾟ 

taglist: @enha-stars @karinasbaby @baevsxii @lillotus17 @syzavxy @mrmld @nikilvrfvr @luvyev @notevenheretbh1 @wvnkoi @seungiesgf @kgneptun @judeduartewannabe @iheartjayke @wonsbubble @ilyjxdz @foggysfrog @oddracha @haechansbbg @tobiosbbyghorl @ryunjin0 @sharksandminhos @jungwoneez @alex-is-sleeping @minjaexvz @woninluv @engeneeee-168 @friendlyuser57 @moony-mari @trdhgg @sleepyhoon @sunghoonsgfreal @i02hoonz @riksaes @021894s @zeeloveshee @jwnghyuns @vhuteryh @cloudiesblog @awsome209 @fleurixzs @xiaoderrrr @marshwatz @aeripark0703 @bambangan @papichulomacy .

apologies to all tumblr wouldn't tag. :)

[w2sology]

DOING THE PRANK WHERE U PRETEND TO GET SOMETHING FROM THE BACK OF THE CAR BUT INTENTIONALLY SMACK YOUR S/O WITH HARRY PLEASE!!!!! would love if u included the comments at the end

cut it out, harry lewis.

summary: harry's been a bit sick of you hopping on tiktok trends, but this one leaves him a little more than baffled.

warnings: none

notes: this trend had me giggling so bad omg 😭😭😭 guys it's been ages (like a month but still) since i last wrote something writer's block was KILLING ME 😀 feel free to send in some prompts or reqs <3

harry had told you to get ready in the next half an hour, that you'd be going on a little date in central london. well, he didn't tell you, rather he sprung the idea up on you after you complained about being bored for the last two days.

it took a lot more than he thought it would've to convince you to leave the house, with harry going as far as telling you that he'd drive. that's how you knew he was being serious.

so as he was getting ready after you, you scrolled through the obsession of your life that was tiktok, laughing every so often and sending some to your friends who had yet to respond to the others that you sent.

stopping on one video that you couldn't stop giggling at, a thought formed in your mind. the tiktok was of a girl who wouldn't stop "accidentally" hotting her boyfriend whilst trying to get things out of the backseat of the car.

it had been ages since you last pulled a joke on harry, yet only the other day he pulled one on you with the help of the boys.

"are you ready yet or are you still laughing at your phone?" harry came back into the bedroom, pulling his navy blue nike hoodie over his shirt.

"i am ready, in fact," you got up, tiptoeing to gently grab a hold of his face, pressing your lips to his. "and the things on my phone will always be funnier than you."

"good joke," he smiled a false smile at you, squeezing your waist before grabbing the keys off of the dresser.

"i still can't believe you're driving. wait, pose with the keys, let me get a photo for your mum."

"don't get too used to this..."

harry walked out before you to put his shoes on, but seeing as you already had yours on, you asked him to unlock the car for you. to him, it seemed you were just eager to leave but really, you had to make sure that there were items in the backseat.

placing one of your tote bags in there, you evenly spread out one of the jellycats that you left in your car and another bag full of spare things. putting the camera at an angle that was able to capture both you and harry, you smiled giddily. soon enough, harry joined you in the driver's side, about to start the car.

"wait!" you called out. "i think i forgot something in the back."

"can't you get it whilst i drive? it's not me you forgot, right?"

"ha ha ha," you rolled your eyes. "no, i might rip it apart by accident."

harry shook his head, nonetheless not starting the car before he looked dead into your camera. he did wonder why you were recording, yet he never actually brought it up.

messing about in the back, deciding which item to use first, you decided on the jellycat.

it was an octopus, one that faith had got you from a trip in florida that she and ethan went to.

"here she is!" you smiled, pulling the jellycat back and purposely hitting it into harry. you did it gently, but not too gentle to the point where he didn't get irritated.

jumping as it made contact with his arm, harry frowned. "ow?" he said, looking at you, but you were too busy dusting off the jellycat.

"hm, actually no." you turned back around to put the stuffed animal back, this time reaching for the tote bag.

luckily, it didn't have anything too sharp in it, so you wouldn't actually hurt harry.

again, you pulled it back with enough force this time slightly jolt harry out of his relaxed position. "are you alright?" he asked, blinking at you.

"huh? what d'you mean?"

"you've just... full on wacked that into me?" he said, more so asked, in shock.

"did i?

"yes?!" you could've sworn you saw his eye twitch, having to restrain your laugh.

"oh," was all you mustered out, looking into the bag as if you actually needed something from it.

harry shook his head, running a hand through his hair as he waited for you to finish. "can we go now?"

"un, not yet actually," and you turned again to the backseat, this time grabbing the last bag.

pulling it back again, it hit harry in his arm, but this time he grabbed the bag from you, tossing it back in the backseat.

"harry! i needed that," you gasped, again to hide your laugh.

"no you didn't, y/n, unless you were using it to target me again" he mimicked your whiny voice.

you didn't know what had you more speechless, the mimicking or his reaction to your silly little prank.

"i wasn't targeting you..."

harry turned to you, giving you the most dead straight look ever. "cut it out, you hit me in the arm three times."

"maybe you were just too close to me."

"i— what?!"

you both stared at each other; harry with a look of shock and slight irritation and you with a serious look that you couldn't quite hold, bursting out in laughter soon after.

"oh my god!" you managed to say in between laughs. "you should see your face!"

"right, let it out. it's not that funny," harry shook his head at your state.

you leaned forward to grab your phone from where you left it, rewinding the last part where harry three the bag in the back. "oh, this is gold."

"you're a right wind up, you know that?" harry said, refusing to give you the satisfaction of know your trick worked on him.

"oh, i know," you smiled at him. "but you live me regardless."

"unfortunately."

"hey," you pushed a hand in his face, instantly groaning when you felt his tongue poke the same hand. "god, just drive."

[n3ptoonz]

mk1 hcs: how the earthrealm guys react when you ride them

this broadcast is brought to you by getting inspired from @dirtymortalkombatconfessions tysm for fueling my raunchy mind 🙏🏾 outworld guys here

all the guys here are submissive in these hcs cause i don't see it enough!!! and reader is GN

Smoke

first of all it's his favorite position. nothing he loves more than holding his partner in his arms while they have power over him at the same time

HE. WHIMPERS. A LOT!!!!

CANNOT keep his hands still he's always massaging or caressing some part of your body

begs. he begs. if you stop moving? he will deadass start tearing up and whispering pleas all in your ear

hold his face while you do it. look him in the eyes and give him praise && give him kisses 😔 he's got enough shit from bi han and this the only way he properly relaxes 💔

Raiden

he's not very vocal at first, but he does sigh and grunt a lot

when he's vocal? he's not loud, but curses up a storm. his eyes get all hazy and glossed over too like you gotta tap him back to reality sometimes

he can get handsy but prefers to either keep his hands in place or have them restrained in some way

speaking of which if you do restrain his hands there's a good chance he'll start bucking once he's close and try to pull free. silly goose, we know how to tie knots around here!

if you get really close to his face like holding it or just looking at him he can and will just start mumbling about how good you make him feel/how you're the only one who makes him feel like this

Kung Lao

(turns on self indulgence beam) ahem taps mic is this thing on??

lao is a praise kink BITCH you understand??? and since he's full of himself he for sure will not shy away from whimpering and groaning loud as hell just to hear his own voice

you give him praise and BOOM suddenly it's upturned eyebrows and beads of tears at the corners of his eyes. he will ask you to repeat what you said over and over

once his pride wears out he's a begging mess like smoke. he's super handsy but in the way where he's acting like you're gonna disappear before he nuts. i cracking up at the thought of that

afterwords "did i do good?" or "was i a good boy?" AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHG hey im normal don't give me that look. ALSO PLAY WITH HIS HAIR he's a sucker for it (glad i can say that now he's not bald)(love you mk11 lao i swear)

Kenshi Takahashi

oooo this sensual romantic ass man. sensual romantic ASS man (he likes ass)

he's not a loud guy or it's just rare. his hands aren't gonna go anywhere but your ass though. MAYBE your thighs, but it's always back to ass!

less on whimpering more on grunting but there's occasional cracks in his voice when feels really good. he only full on whimpers if you go fast and gets closer faster from the pace

please for the love of god leave some sort of marks on this man's neck. it drives him CRAZYYYY he'll be cursing like he's never done before especially cause he WILL return the favor

like raiden if you give his face more love especially around his eyes it's up for him you're going to be told how perfect and how good only you can make him feel for the next 72 hours

Johnny Cage

BRAT. he's a brat. Johnny John Carlton Cage is a B R A T

you will have to physically shut him up and that was his mission accomplished. don't let his hands be free either cause he'll keep trying to take control (and keep failing every single time)(again, this was allll part of the plan)

when he's completely helpless at your disposal...bottom bitch alert! whiny whimpering grunting sighing giggling you name it CENTRAL. he the type to whine about being restricted when it was literally his own idea in the first place

he's a praise kink bitch too i mean come on THE johnny cage ik you weren't expecting otherwise. tell him he's a good boy but also call him your bitch oh how he loves it

and by the way... record. everything. he'll watch those tapes back like they're old school vhs memories

Liu Kang

how you got a god to submit to you is beyond anyone's belief. but who cares?! drain that mf (balls)

he absolutely positively loves loves LOVES eye contact. you look him in the eyes long enough it's like your souls are fuckin too (literally that scene with him and titan kitana except you're looking down at him everybodyshutthefuckup)

give him a bunch of kisses pls pls pls he craves it he adores it CARNALLY. very very handsy man there's no part of you that goes untouched.

he's too calm to be loud but he does grunt and will have dragged out moans that result in a higher pitched tone

surprise, even a god could use some praise every now and then!!! he blushes the most whenever you call him perfect or tell him he's doing great even with all that's on his plate on the daily <3

Sub Zero

this stubborn fucker. just pull his hair and give him the same look he gives everybody and he's all yours cause then he'll look like this (i cannot stop referring to this picture)

in the privacy of your shared room (idc if this is ooc this is tumblr god damn it) he's a stuttering mess and cannot keep his hands off your hips and thighs for anything so prepare for those areas to have frostbite

there are times where his hands slide up your back when he's close, and by this time his furrowed brows and sharp gaze are completely gone. he's looking up at you like you've descended just to give him the ride of his life (bc you did obviously)

if he whimpers it's raspy and deep. he generally grunts and groans and a lot of profane language coming from them lips

however comma it's rare he'll shudder and whine like a lil bitch if he can't touch you oooo and he's a bucker too

Scorpion

last but certainly not least this sexy mf. i fully fully believe that he would not hesitate to submit to someone he's in love with (you hahaha)

you don't even need to pull his hair just glide your fingers through it he's set for life. he sighs and just smiles, you're so good to him

he's not very vocal but he certainly whines and has shallower breaths when he's close. when he looks up at you he has to try his hardest not to bust right there cause damnnn you fine as hail

thigh man thigh man thigh man. oh, did i say thigh man? i meant to say HE'S A THIGH MAN. and neck, like kenshi don't even think about getting up off of him without a bunch of marks on his neck and shoulders if ya feelin freekie

if you pull his hair he will cum. and you heard that from me.

ask box is open! <3

[tobiasdrake]

Fun Fact: Even in space, ACAB.

Let's talk about Jaco: The Galactic Patrolman, a somewhat more obscure manga compared to Dragon Ball that Akira Toriyama wrote in its setting.

For the most part, this is a short and fairly simple story. It's primarily a character drama, with the developing relationship between Jaco and the scientist Omori as its central focus.

The manga is surprisingly vague about its connections to Dragon Ball for nearly all of its length, until its final chapter. Jaco is here on Earth to thwart some vague threat sent to the planet from a world of hostile aliens. It's only at the end of the manga that we learn he's talking about Goku.

Galactic Patrol detected an Attack Ball leaving Planet Vegeta and making its way to Earth, so they sent Jaco to... assess the situation and then make a decision about whether or not to do anything.

In his defense, the Saiyans are the most powerful race in the universe. I can understand why he doesn't want to fuck with a full-grown Saiyan warrior. Nobody wants to fuck with a full-grown Saiyan warrior. The most that the finest police force in the universe can do against Saiyans is to try and nip them in the bud when they're babies.

It's interesting that Galactic Patrol doesn't have Scouter technology. I wonder if that proprietary? Frieza might have a patent.

But at the same time, I don't want to be too sympathetic to Jaco because. Well. He sucks.

Galactic Patrol sucks. That's kind of the bit. Jaco is a self-absorbed little shit, utterly devoid of empathy or compassion for the people he polices. He's stranded on Earth right now because he wasn't watching the road while driving.

Jaco's a prick, but what little we learn about Galactic Patrol as a whole doesn't make them sound much better.

This one time Jaco accidentally pressed the Extinction Bomb when he wasn't supposed to and wiped out a planet. Hoo boy, was his boss mad! Gave him a real talking to before giving him another Extinction Bomb and putting him back on patrol.

Universe isn't going to police itself, y'know. Someone's gotta be out there very occasionally trying to stop those real estate genocides.

For his part, Jaco's in it for the aesthetic. He likes the image of being a cop, and he spends his time practicing looking cool for when he presumably dispenses justice upon the criminal element.

But his interactions with the common people are filled with condescension and menace.

Like I said, this is the bit. Jaco is a self-important thug with a badge, with the initial conflict stemming as much from trying to keep him from doing something awful to the community under his jurisdiction as from trying to solve his problem.

Ostensibly here to protect Earth from the impending arrival of a Saiyan threat, he is as much a threat to this community as the invader he's here to assess. Without Omori there to guide him, he'd be killing people left and right.

He fits in pretty well with the cast of Dragon Ball, many of whom at least begin their tenure with a degree of amorality to them. Omori himself is a bitter misanthrope ironically thrust into the position of having to convince Jaco not to kill people.

And then there's the manga's biggest Dragon Ball connection: The introduction of Tights.

Any reader who's been picking up on the Dragon Ball-ness of this universe will know immediately where Tights came from. Her name pun gives the game away. Just like how the final chapter clarifies Jaco's target as the young Goku, we get to see the familiar faces of Tights's family as well.

Bulma basically solves the entire plot singlehandedly.

Even as a little kid, the universe's greatest heretic remains unparalleled in the field of game-breaking super-intelligence. Bulma OP do not nerf.

Again, this speaks to how little of the manga is actually about the plot. If this were a story-driven manga, having a character from another manga show up in the final issue and solve the plot in the span of two pages would be pretty disappointing. But since the plot is just an excuse to make these characters interact with one another, it doesn't really matter.

We aren't here for the story; We're here for the relationship between Jaco, Omori, and Tights. With that in mind, Baby Bulma waddling up and going "I fixed the spaceship; Are you stupid or something?" is hysterical.

For her part, Tights lives up to her family legacy of being super-brilliant.

She graduated from college at 16. She's a genius like the rest of the family. What she's not is interested in science and technology. Possibly as a justification for why we've never heard of her before, Tights goes against the mold for her family.

She honestly seems like something of a free spirit. She lives in East City when we meet her, famously the city that Nappa wiped off the map, while Capsule Corp and Bulma's family are out in West City. Rather than a scientist, she works as a body double for a famous pop idol.

As a publicity stunt, they're going to launch an idol into space. Tights's job is to impersonate the idol so she can die in the inevitable disaster instead. She is bizarrely chill with being paid a huge sum of money to get stupidly killed. Much like Bulma, Tights has a terrible sense of self-preservation and is willing to take on incredible risk for the sake of achieving a personal goal.

Tights is the best character in the manga. An aspiring sci-fi novelist who agreed to probably die in space for the sake of the experience. This family gives zero fucks.

And then there's Omori himself.

Despite its title, Omori is basically the main character of this manga. He's the one whose life situation is most heavily scrutinized. This is his status quo that Jaco and Tights enter. Similarly, Omori is the character who undergoes personal transformation as his experiences with Jaco and Tights help him find hope in connections with other people again.

The three characters click really well together. So well, in fact, that Dragon Ball would end up recycling the setup of Super Alien/Crotchety Old Man/Spunky Young Woman for one of the best dynamics they ever wrote.

This is not a copy/paste; Cheelai, Leemo, and Broly are all distinctly separate characters. but you can still feel the barebones aesthetic of Tights, Omori, and Jaco in their dynamic.

So. Yeah. Overall, for what it is, it's a cute little short story about a group of characters just living lives in the world of Dragon Ball. It's the kind of thing that the franchise needs more of, and still does to this day: An opportunity to flesh out the universe a little but also just to let us live in it through the eyes of someone else.

[venusianpulp]

What Type of Lover Do You Attract Natal Chart Edition Con't...

This is a fun way to reveal the type of lover or type of energy you naturally attract into your life based on specific placements in your chart. Since I am not including specific transits, just keep in mind that this is on a broad & more thematic scale that doesn't include what you, yourself may actually want and need from a lover. It is tapping into the type that YOU ATTRACT based on natal placements

I will be honing in on Venus sign & house, 7th house ruler & descendant, and Mars' sign & house placements, and lastly 5th house ruler

This is a continuation from the previous post

7th House Planets:

The planets that fall into your 7th house in your natal chart can offer insights into the type of lovers and partners you may attract or the qualities you seek in a relationship. The 7th house represents partnerships, marriage, and significant others. Here's a description of each planet in the 7th house and its potential influence on the type of lover you may attract: if you do not have any planets in the 7th house, thats okay, there are other signs in both of these posts you can reference. We all have a 7th house ruler so that just be the dominant theme of partnerships etc in your life and you can refer to that signs planetary ruler for more insight.

Sun in the 7th House: You attract partners who are strong-willed, confident, and seek recognition. These individuals may play a central role in your life and encourage personal growth through their presence.

Moon in the 7th House: You attract partners who are emotionally supportive and nurturing. These individuals offer a deep emotional connection and seek harmony and understanding in relationships.

Mercury in the 7th House: You attract partners who are communicative and intellectual. Conversation and mental connection play a vital role in your relationships, and you value a partner's ability to engage in meaningful discussions.

Venus in the 7th House: You attract partners who embody Venusian qualities such as beauty, harmony, and love. These individuals bring a sense of grace and charm to your life, and you value relationships that are balanced and harmonious.

Mars in the 7th House: You attract partners who are assertive, dynamic, and passionate. These individuals ignite your own passion and drive, and you value a partner who can challenge and inspire you.

Jupiter in the 7th House: You attract partners who bring positivity, expansion, and growth into your life. These individuals may have a larger-than-life presence, and you value relationships that encourage exploration and learning.

Saturn in the 7th House: You attract partners who are responsible, stable, and may have a serious demeanor. These individuals value commitment and long-term goals, and you appreciate the sense of security they bring.

Uranus in the 7th House: You attract partners who are unique, unconventional, and independent. These individuals may bring excitement and change into your life, and you value relationships that allow for personal freedom.

Neptune in the 7th House: You attract partners who are sensitive, spiritual, and dreamy. These individuals may bring a sense of mystery and idealism to your relationships, and you value emotional depth and connection.

Pluto in the 7th House: You attract partners who bring intensity, transformation, and a deep emotional connection. These individuals may challenge you to confront your inner depths and seek profound changes in your life.

Mars Through the Houses:

Mars plays a significant role in attraction and the type of lover someone might attract in a natal chart. Mars represents desires, passions, and how you assert yourself. Its placement by sign and house can offer insights into the qualities you seek in a partner and the type of energy you're drawn to. Here's an overview of how Mars in different houses and ruled by each of the 12 zodiac signs might influence the type of lover you attract:

Mars in the 1st House: You attract partners who admire your confidence and assertiveness. They're drawn to your dynamic energy and your willingness to take the lead.

Mars in the 2nd House: You attract partners who appreciate your determination and practicality. They're drawn to your focus on security and your ability to work hard for what you want.

Mars in the 3rd House: You attract partners who value your communication skills and intellectual stimulation. They're drawn to your curiosity and your ability to engage in lively conversations.

Mars in the 4th House: You attract partners who appreciate your protective and nurturing qualities. They're drawn to your dedication to family and your ability to create a comfortable home.

Mars in the 5th House: You attract partners who enjoy your creativity and playfulness. They're drawn to your passion and your ability to bring excitement to the relationship.

Mars in the 6th House: You attract partners who value your diligence and your willingness to be of service. They're drawn to your practicality and your ability to contribute positively to their lives.

Mars in the 7th House: You attract partners who appreciate your assertiveness and your ability to stand up for yourself. They're drawn to your energy and your willingness to engage in balanced and fair relationships.

Mars in the 8th House: You attract partners who are intrigued by your intensity and passion. They're drawn to your depth and your ability to explore the deeper aspects of life.

Mars in the 9th House: You attract partners who value your adventurous spirit and your willingness to explore new horizons. They're drawn to your enthusiasm for learning and experiencing different cultures.

Mars in the 10th House: You attract partners who admire your ambition and your determination to succeed. They're drawn to your leadership qualities and your drive to make a mark in the world.

Mars in the 11th House: You attract partners who appreciate your uniqueness and your ability to stand out. They're drawn to your progressive ideas and your willingness to contribute positively to your social circles.

Mars in the 12th House: You attract partners who are intrigued by your mystery and spirituality. They're drawn to your compassion and your ability to connect on a deeper, spiritual level.

Mars Through the Signs:

Mars in Aries: You attract partners who are assertive, independent, and passionate. These individuals are drawn to your dynamic energy and enthusiasm. They appreciate your directness and willingness to take the lead.

Mars in Taurus: You attract partners who are stable, sensual, and practical. These individuals value loyalty and appreciate your grounded nature. They're drawn to your reliability and dedication.

Mars in Gemini: You attract partners who are communicative, intellectually stimulating, and curious. These individuals enjoy your lively conversations and appreciate your ability to engage them mentally.

Mars in Cancer: You attract partners who are nurturing, emotional, and sensitive. These individuals value your caring nature and are drawn to the emotional connections you provide.

Mars in Leo: You attract partners who are confident, expressive, and charismatic. These individuals enjoy your playfulness and the attention you bring to relationships. They're drawn to your passion and creativity.

Mars in Virgo: You attract partners who are practical, detail-oriented, and helpful. These individuals appreciate your organization and your willingness to contribute to their lives in meaningful ways.

Mars in Libra: You attract partners who are charming, harmonious, and value fairness. These individuals seek balance in relationships and are drawn to your diplomacy and willingness to compromise.

Mars in Scorpio: You attract partners who are intense, passionate, and transformative. These individuals value deep emotional connections and are drawn to your magnetic and mysterious nature.

Mars in Sagittarius: You attract partners who are adventurous, open-minded, and enthusiastic. These individuals enjoy your love for exploration and seek a partner who shares their sense of freedom.

Mars in Capricorn: You attract partners who are ambitious, responsible, and value stability. These individuals appreciate your dedication to your goals and are drawn to your strong work ethic.

Mars in Aquarius: You attract partners who are unconventional, intellectual, and value individuality. These individuals enjoy your unique perspective and seek a partner who can engage them intellectually.

Mars in Pisces: You attract partners who are compassionate, sensitive, and spiritually inclined. These individuals value your empathy and are drawn to your ability to connect on a deep emotional level.

5th House Ruler:

the ruler of the 5th house in a natal chart can provide insights into the type of romantic and creative relationships a person may encounter. The 5th house is associated with romance, self-expression, creativity, and fun. The planet that rules this house and its placement in the natal chart can offer valuable information about the nature of relationships and experiences you might have. Here's an overview of each planet ruling the 5th house and its potential influence:

Sun in the 5th House: You may encounter relationships that are centered around shared interests and creative self-expression. These relationships often emphasize fun, playfulness, and mutual admiration.

Moon in the 5th House: Your relationships might be emotionally fulfilling and nurturing. You seek partners who provide a sense of security and emotional connection. Creative pursuits are often shared with partners.

Mercury in the 5th House: Your relationships are likely to be intellectually stimulating and characterized by lively communication. You connect through conversations, shared ideas, and mutual interests.

Venus in the 5th House: Romance and artistic expression play a significant role in your relationships. You're drawn to partners who bring creativity, beauty, and a sense of enjoyment into your life.

Mars in the 5th House: Your relationships are often passionate and dynamic. You're attracted to partners who are energetic, assertive, and share your enthusiasm for life.

Jupiter in the 5th House: You seek expansive and joyful relationships that offer growth and adventure. Partners bring positivity, optimism, and a sense of adventure into your life.

Saturn in the 5th House: You approach relationships with seriousness and a desire for commitment. You may encounter partners who encourage responsibility, stability, and long-term planning.

Uranus in the 5th House: Your relationships are likely to be unconventional and dynamic. You're attracted to partners who embrace uniqueness, individuality, and who bring excitement to your life.

Neptune in the 5th House: You may experience romantic relationships that are dreamy, spiritual, and emotionally deep. Partners might share your artistic and creative sensibilities.

Pluto in the 5th House: Your relationships can be intense and transformative. You're drawn to partners who challenge you on a deep emotional level and bring profound changes to your life.

5th House Signs:

Aries in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are energetic, spontaneous, and adventurous. These individuals enjoy your boldness and share your enthusiasm for life. They value your ability to take initiative in the relationship.

Taurus in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are sensual, stable, and value comfort. These individuals appreciate your patience and reliability. They enjoy the cozy and nurturing atmosphere you bring to the relationship.

Gemini in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are communicative, intellectually stimulating, and playful. These individuals enjoy your wit and lively conversations. They seek a partner who shares their curiosity and versatility.

Cancer in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are nurturing, emotional, and seek emotional security. These individuals value your empathy and sensitivity. They appreciate the emotional depth you bring to the relationship.

Leo in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are confident, expressive, and enjoy the spotlight. These individuals appreciate your charisma and creative self-expression. They value the excitement and passion you bring to the relationship.

Virgo in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are practical, detail-oriented, and value stability. These individuals admire your attention to detail and your willingness to contribute to the relationship in practical ways.

Libra in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are harmonious, diplomatic, and value balance. These individuals appreciate your charm and your desire for fairness. They seek a partner who can create a harmonious and equal partnership.

Scorpio in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are intense, passionate, and seek deep emotional connections. These individuals value your intensity and are drawn to your ability to create profound emotional bonds.

Sagittarius in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are adventurous, open-minded, and enjoy exploring new horizons. These individuals share your enthusiasm for life and seek a partner who can embark on exciting journeys with them.

Capricorn in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are ambitious, responsible, and value stability. These individuals appreciate your determination and your dedication to long-term goals. They seek a partner who can provide security and support.

Aquarius in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are unconventional, intellectual, and value individuality. These individuals are drawn to your unique perspective and your ability to engage in intellectually stimulating conversations.

Pisces in the 5th House: You attract lovers who are compassionate, sensitive, and spiritually inclined. These individuals value your empathy and your ability to connect on a deep emotional and spiritual level.

Remember, there are other factors that play into this like skews in the personality type of you and the other person, such as disharmonious aspects or if the planets are in their fall in certain signs such as Mars in Cancer, which brings up themes of possessiveness and jealousy. If you want another post going further into detail - you know what to do, drop a comment or if you want one specific to yourself, message me for an astro reading. I also offer Astro Remediation which will help transmute any negative effects of planets & signs in malefics or in their detriment or fall in your chart. These remedies really help to stabilize your energy as well as the manifestations of what is meant to come toward you in a positive way!

[carsthatnevermadeitetc]

Duo & Bento by Mobilize, 2024. Renault's new mobility subsidiary has revealed a pair of electric urban quadricycles. As the name suggests Duo is a 2 seater with a central driving position and the passenger squeezed behind the driver. Bento seats only the driver with a 649-litre cargo box at the rear. Both vehicles have a generous range – up to 161 km for Duo and 149 km for Bento and include over 40% of recycled materials and are 95% recyclable. The Duo will be available to order from 14 October 2024.

[write4cench]

distractions.

summary: central cee and you decided to collaborate together on a track together, but when things get a little too heated your minds drive… elsewhere

pairings: single!central cee x reader

genre: smut.. just smut

word count: 2.6k+ (unedited)

a/n: this is my first smut lmao can't believe i've done this, i mean i couldn’t help it central cee too fine. i’m not the best at it though.. 😁😁🙏🏾

central cee and you both spend your time in his private studio, located in his apartment. it's decently sized but not too spacious, regardless it gets the job done and the both of you manage to produce and record your lines for the track.

you've both wanted to work with one another on a song together and so have your fans, they've been awaiting this for so long that your management team decided it was the best decision.

you stand on inside of the booth looking down at the lyrics sheet that lies in front of you, humming the rhythm before the track plays within your headphones and you begin to sing along over your back vocals.

cench sits in front of you layed back in one of the wheely chairs that sit behind the booth, he watches you sing nodding his head to the rhythm of the song but also impressed by your vocal abilities.

it's the two of you alone in the studio which is quiet unusual considering the fact that during the last studio sessions the studio was filled with friends of central cee who decided to show up.

but instead this time, it's only the two of you. but it feels far from awkward it feels comforting and you both focus on getting the work done.

the song's chorus comes to and end and he stops the instrumental from playing again, upon finishing you glance at him and put a thumbs up asking him if you did good enough of a job, he nods and you do a small celebration that makes him laugh.

he begins to speak but it's too muffled due to the soundproof booth so you take your headphones off and open the door slightly to hear him better, "you did great, we don't even have to run it over again." he admits and you smile.

"you sure, i feel like some of it was a little off." you tell him but he shakes his head in refusal so you decided to leave it since it is his song after all.

"can i hear it over?" you ask him and he nods playing it over again, you put the headphones back onto your head and listen to it carefully.

the song starts off with central cee's wonderful rap that as usual never miss, the song then slips into the chorus that you sing and the beat drop before it sounds perfect.

the booth of you glance at one another in satisfaction at the song so far, sharing a smile as it continues before stopping at the progress so far.

"i think it's great so far." you say with a sigh as you sit behind the booth on one of the wheely chair turning yourself side to side.

"it's more than great." he mumbles.

the room is quiet and you decide to take out your phone, you glance at the time to see it read 10:43pm, it's getting later and you consider leaving within the next 20 minutes.

he finds an interest in the piano in front of the two of you, playing random notes that don't even sound too great together, you watch him finding the sight hilarious he notices so and shrugs embarrassed.

"i'm not too much a piano player," he sighs shaking his head trying to save himself, "i took lessons for a week and gave up on it." he clarifies and you nod your head numerously in a joking manner.

"can you even play any instrument?" you ask him genuinely and he shakes his head, your mouth drops in disbelief.

"maybe it's something i should get into, i don't play anything." he admits before smiling sheepishly.

"i'll show you something."

your hands find a placement onto the keyboard, testing out the position by pressing down on the notes to get the right keys. you begin to play something small and watch how his face turns into full surprise.

you smile as you continue before you get to distracted by him watching you and pause, "i can't focus with you watching me like that." you tell him annoyed and he laughs.

"forget i'm even here." he sighs closing his eyes and leaning back into your seat; you watch him do so frowning.

"how am i supposed to forget your there." you tell him but he doesn't respond so you exhale deeply before continuing to play the piano.

you'd admit, it's been a while since you've last played the piano but you've impressed yourself by still remembering the notes to the piece you play every single time.

you continue to play the piano forgetting he's even there until you come to an end, when you turn to look at him he's still laid back into his seat with his eyes closed, his hood lying over his head.

is he sleeping?

you hit him on the side of his arm and he winces before sitting upright, his hand rushing to soothe where he was attacked, "that fucking hurt." he groans and you smile to yourself.

"were you sleeping whilst i was playing?" you question him and he sighs still whining over the punch you just gave him.

"you didn't need to punch me like that," he starts watching how you only smile, "i wasn't sleeping, i was just resting my eyes innit."

you hum in response and watch how he sits upright in his seat rolling the chair over to stand beside you, he glances over the keys on the piano before speaking. "teach me something." he says.

"what am i supposed to teach you." you question him, he shrugs his shoulders with a yawn not helping you one bit.

"i dunno, maybe a chord or some shit." he utters and you bite your lip in thought of watch chord to do. he watches as your hand runs along the keyboard thinking of a position before it plays a chord.

he watches you carefully and when the pleasing sound rings he glances at you only to find you looking at him already, "did you see that?" you ask him and he shakes his head.

you roll your eyes in response, "what, am i supposed to get it on the first try?" he questions you confused only to see you nod.

you watch as his tattooed hand reaches over attempting to do the same hand movement that you did, but it doesn't succeed to make the correct sound.

"no, your supposed to do it like this." you mumble, your hand reaching over to correct his. you move his hand one down along and place it on top of his getting him to push it down as it sounds the correct chord.

"what chord was that?" he asks you curiously, you glance to look at him and it's only then you both notice how close you are to one another.

"c." you say. upon hearing your response he laughs to himself and you watch him confused, after seeing your confused face he stops laughing.

"it wasn't a c, for central cee." you mumble.

"yeah, definitely."

"you're not that special." you joke to him as you move your hand away from his and he nods gazing at you, it's only when you look up that your eyes meet his.

"mhm."

silence. you don't know what to say to him and you won't lie the way that his voice sounded when he hummed did something to you. you feel your cheeks begin to redden and you mentally curse at yourself.

luckily, the room is tinted dark blue so it's impossible for him to notice a thing; or it could just really be due to your melanated skin.

it's obvious that he notices how he's caught you out of words as a smirk grows upon his face, you watch his lips do so until he brings you out of your thoughts. "i got you quiet, i won." he mumbles.

you remain quiet not saying anything until the space between the two of you becomes smaller, before you could think of anything your lips press against his.

you can feel his smirk widen against your lips wider before he kisses you back, deeper but not too desperate. you don't even notice the fact you've just kissed central cee, your mind is just completely filled with.. desire.

the kiss runs long and you feel his arms wrap around your lower waist bringing you close to him, but the inconvenience of the chairs makes you get up from your chair and sit up on his lap instead.

it's then that everything hits you and you pull apart from his lips, your chest heaves numerously in sync with his and you eyes glance all over his face as you realise what's happening.

his gaze reads something completely different, his once playful eyes have turned dark and hazy showcasing lust instead it makes you ache for more and the position of you siting up on him creates even more need within your lower region.

"fuck." he says and before you know it, he's kissing you again. the kiss is more desperate and you fall into it, he takes the dominance but you try to keep a hold of everything by wrapping your arms around his neck.

you feel him grow harder and harder beneath you just how you grow desperate and desperate, you need him badly just as bad as you need him. you'd never ever think that tonight would turn out the way it did.

your hips subconsciously begin to move slowly against his but he grabs a hold of you stopping you, his lips part away from you and you frown at him, he sees this and smiles.

he kisses your neck and you lean your head back giving him even more space, you don't care that you'll probably end up with hickies all over your neck when you feel him slightly bite you, all you need is him.

"i need you so bad." he mumbles against your neck before pecking your neck all the way up to the side of your face, you look at one another before it hits and you share a smile.

before you know it your up from his lap and your hands occupy themselves into pulling his sweats down, when you see the sight of his harden self through his pants you glance back up at him only to see him covering his face with his hand.

you pull down his boxers and he springs free his member hitting you against your nose catching you aback, you stare at him for a moment but a moment too long and he peers down at you.

"don't just stare at it." he groans and you smile, you lick the tip of his cock and the pleasing sensation sends a moan to leave his lips. you tease him, your tounge running around the tip where he's most sensitive and he moans.

he grows to desperate and before you know it his hand comes up to your head, he finds a comfort in your hair before he pushes your head down his shaft slowly.

you breathe through your nose as you take in his size before growing used to it and beginning to pump your head slowly down his shaft continuously causing him to groan quietly.

he uses your head to help him reach his high, pumping you slowly down him but also muttering how good you are occasionally. you feel your eyes begin to water slightly but luckily you don't have to much of a gag reflex.

"fuck, you're so good." he groans as he watches you take him, his hand helping to move your hair away from your face, he closes his eyes tightly as he approaches his orgasm.

his moans become shorter and more intense and it's then you can tell that he's about to release any minute. perfect. you pull away from him and he looks down at you confused.

you watch as he glares at you annoyed, "what the fuck was that for?" he asks you but you don't say anything rubbing your mouth clean with the back of your hand.

his eyes don't leave you once, reading nothing but pissed at the interruption of his orgasm, he watches you as you take off your trousers and pants; his cock twitching ever so slightly as it pleads for your attention.

"you think i'd let you cum first?" you ask him and he furrows his brows in complete denial.

you approach him as you kick away your lower clothes that pool around your feet, glaring at him "fuck me then." you tell him, he watches you with his mouth agape never expecting to see you turn into a completely different person.

you lean against the producing equipment waiting for him expectantly, but when you feel his presence behind you and his hands hold your ass you let out a moan.

he slaps your ass, making you gasp at the sudden pain before he rubs your cheek to soothe it. he pulls out a condom from the inside of his pocket and you turn around to glance at him at the sound of it opening.

"you had that on you all along?" you ask him and he grins taking it out before pulling it over his cock.

"knew i'd need it." and with that he pushes himself into you slowly without warning making your mouth agape.

he waits for a moment until he's all the way in you before he starts to move, thrust in and out of you each time causing you to moan.

your bodies are in sync as he fucks you getting turned on by the sight of you bent before him as he fucks you senseless. he gradually becomes more faster and his thrusts become stronger.

"shit." you moan although your words sound all messed up due to the rocking back and forth you experience from his thrusts.

your hands hold onto the bumpy toggles in front of you trying to find something to hold onto as you take each thrust that runs through you. you're floating in ecstasy and it all feels too good.

he moans many things under his breath that you can't pick up on too busy by being engulfed in the intense pleasure you experience as you gradually approach your high.

you feel his hand reach over underneath you, rubbing your sensitive clit whilst he takes you; the feeling of him inside you, but his hand rubbing on your sensitive bud makes it all eventually unbareable.

your moans become louder and more desperate as you feel your high approaching; once again his hand slaps your ass earning another loud gasp from you.

your hair is held up my his hand and it's obvious your makeup is probably fucked up by now, but at this point that doesn't even matter to you anymore. everything just feels too good.

you reach your orgasm and pant vigorously, he notices this and pulls out of you rubbing himself with his hand as he releases himself inside of his condom.

you rest your head on the equipment in front of you as you both catch your breath, it's only then that you feel your legs become to grow all achy and weak.

"shit, my legs." you laugh to yourself as you wobble; he notices this and laughs tying the condom and obviously throwing it into the bin.

"good luck." he jokes and you roll your eyes.

"i need to shower." you complain feeling all sticky as usual after sex, he hums in agreement.

"i'll shower with you." he smiles.

you attempt to push him away but due to your growing weak legs you fail, instead complaining about how sore they are. seems like central cee has won in keeping you quiet.

"so are we gonna work on the track again?"

"probably not for now."

[tuiccim]

Lost in the Dark

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Word Count: 485

Warnings: Dark content! Somnophilia, Non/DubCon, and other dark elements. This fic contains dark themes and may include potentially triggering topics. You are solely responsible for your media consumption.

Summary: Bucky comes home after a mission and can't wait to be with you.

A/N: Special thanks to my beta readers @whisperlullaby and @fandomsaremylifeline.

The house was dark as Bucky bound up the stairs late in the night. He had been gone for two days and you weren’t expecting him back until tomorrow night. He smiled as he entered your bedroom to find you sound asleep. Naked and laid out on your stomach, you had your arms wrapped under your pillow and your ass was on display making Bucky lick his lips. 

Bucky steps into the adjoining bathroom and strips. He smirks in the mirror at the wicked idea that had crossed his mind. Heading back to the bed, you hadn’t moved an inch and he chuckles lightly at the deep sleep you were in. He had rarely seen you like this and he enjoyed watching you so comfortable in his bed. 

Climbing onto the bed, he straddles your legs and positions himself. He had applied a generous amount of lube to his cock and slid inside of you with little resistance. 

“Fuuuuck, I’ve missed you, Doll,” he whispers as he feels your muscles clench around him. He moves slowly at first but the little whine you let out has his cock throbbing. It had been too long for his tastes and feeling you wrapped around him was intoxicating. His hips began pistoning, driving deeper, and he knew you were fully awake when your hands wrapped around the metal headboard. 

His hand slides under your body to find your clit and make swift circles, “Couldn’t wait till morning, doll. Had to feel this tight cunt squeezing me. Two days is too long to be away from you.”

He knows your body and plays it as a skilled master. Your body tightens and breath hitches as the waves of your orgasm break over you. Unbidden, a high pitched moan escapes you and you feel Bucky tighten above you. 

“Fuck, that’s what I needed,” he whispers in your ear as he thrusts sloppily, meeting his own end. He lays on top of you for a moment, catching his breath, and occasionally thrusting inside you with the aftershocks. Flipping you over, he looks deeply into your eyes with a sweet smile before bringing his lips to yours. He kisses you thoroughly, reminding himself of your sweet nature and softness. “Couldn't wait to get back to you, doll,” he smiles as he slips out of bed. “I’m gonna start the shower. You know I have to have you at least one more time before I can sleep.” 

You watch his naked form as he walks to the dim light coming from the bathroom. When he goes through, you wipe a tear from your eye and your hand trails to feel the collar around your neck. A delicate chain attached it to the bed frame. All made from vibranium. You had been sleeping soundly for the first time in months knowing that he was away on a mission but, now, your captor is home. 

Part 2

Updates and taglist: Due to the unreliable nature of tags, I no longer keep a taglist. Updates for series will be made on Sundays Central Time Zone. Please follow my sideblog @tuiccimfanfiction and turn on notifications for updates. All series and new stories will be reblogged to it. You will only receive notifications when a new part or story is out! Nothing else will be blogged to the page. I can’t thank you enough for your support!

[esotericalchemist]

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐙𝐨𝐧𝐞 - 𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐱 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐲 ☆

TikTok - Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

The Character Zone in the Matrix of Destiny represents the core traits and behaviors that shape an individual’s personality. It reveals inherent strengths, weaknesses, and tendencies that influence how a person interacts with the world. Each energy in the Character Zone defines distinct qualities, such as courage, empathy, creativity, or spontaneity, providing insight into personal growth and life lessons. Understanding these energies helps one align with their true nature and navigate life more purposefully.

Calculate your Matrix of Destiny here:

Matrix of Destiny calculator

( if that one does not work, use the following link: alternative calculator)

! --- LOOK AT THE NUMBER IN THE MIDDLE --!

< image source: here! >

3. The Empress

The Third Arcanum in the Character Zone represents the core energy of femininity, beauty, and nurturing. This energy shapes the individual’s personality by emphasizing a deep connection to the feminine qualities of care, sensitivity, and creation. People with this energy in their Character Zone are often strongly influenced by their relationship with their mother or the maternal figures in their family.

The Third Arcanum fosters a desire to nurture and protect, whether that means raising children, taking care of loved ones, or nurturing creative projects. For women, it highlights the importance of embracing their femininity and taking care of their appearance and overall well-being. For men, it may manifest as gentleness, flexibility, and a nurturing personality, often leading them to prioritize family and relationships.

This arcanum encourages an individual to find fulfillment in the act of caring and creating beauty in the world around them, with a strong emphasis on maternal energy and nurturing instincts. The Third Energy pushes them to live in harmony with their feminine side and to use it to foster relationships and personal growth.

4. The Emperor

The Fourth Arcanum in the Character Zone represents the core energy of leadership, strength, and responsibility. People with this energy embody traditional masculine qualities, including being protective, decisive, and strong-willed. Their sense of duty and the need to control their surroundings are central to their personality, driving them to take charge in life, family, and work.

These individuals often see themselves as leaders and heads of their household, naturally assuming responsibility for others. They are pragmatic, self-sufficient, and focused on achieving their goals. However, if this energy isn't harnessed positively, it can lead to issues such as over-aggression, an inability to accept help, or a tendency to dominate others in unhealthy ways.

The Fourth Energy pushes individuals to be the anchor in their family or community, taking on the role of protector and provider. Success and self-actualization for them come from accepting responsibility, being independent, and using their strength wisely.

5. The Hierophant

The fifth arcanum represents the core traits of learning, teaching, and passing on wisdom. People with this energy at the heart of their Destiny Code are naturally inclined to seek out knowledge, traditions, and truths, and they often feel compelled to share what they learn with others. They may be seen as teachers or guides in their communities, embodying the role of those who preserve and pass on the wisdom of the past while creating new traditions.

This energy pushes them to continually grow in knowledge, ensuring that their learning is not just for themselves but also for the benefit of others. They are often driven by a need to make sense of the world, and this intellectual pursuit becomes a defining feature of their character. For those with Knowledge in their Character Zone, faith in something greater, whether it be in God, the universe, or simply in their purpose, is crucial to their personal growth and fulfillment.

6. The Lovers

The sixth arcanum in the Character Zone represents a core energy that revolves around love, communication, and making choices. People with this energy are driven by a deep desire to love and be loved, and this energy shapes their personality, making them charming, graceful, and often very attractive to others. They are naturally inclined towards socializing and forming connections, which they value highly in their lives.

One of the main lessons for individuals with this energy is to learn how to love themselves. The sixth arcanum requires them to focus on self-acceptance, as their ability to love others and attract love from others stems from their capacity to embrace their true selves. When this energy is well-balanced, it radiates beauty, emotional maturity, and honesty, allowing these individuals to build harmonious relationships with those around them.

In the Character Zone, this energy often presents challenges with decision-making, as people with this arcanum may struggle with choices in life, both big and small. However, once they learn to confidently make decisions and love themselves without constantly seeking validation from others, they unlock the full potential of this energy.

7. The Chariot

The seventh arcanum represents a driving force of action, speed, and achievement. People with this energy in their Destiny Code Matrix are natural achievers, constantly striving to move forward and hit their goals. They thrive on action and momentum, always feeling the need to progress, and can be frustrated by anything they perceive as slowing them down.

This energy provides immense stamina and drive, pushing them to act swiftly and decisively. However, Sevens must ensure they have clear goals, as aimlessness can lead to chaos and restlessness in their lives. When they have a target in mind, they excel at focusing all their energy toward reaching it.

In the Character Zone, this energy shapes a person who is always on the move, both mentally and physically, and motivates others around them to take action as well. Their strength lies in their ability to inspire movement and create momentum, but they must also learn to balance their speed with thoughtfulness, ensuring they don’t rush blindly without considering the consequences.

8. Justice

Arcanum 8, known as Justice, represents responsibility, law, and karma. Those with the energy of the Eighth Arcanum in the Character Zone are guided by a strong internal code of honor and an innate sense of fairness. They have a deep connection to karma, understanding that every action carries consequences, and they strive to act in alignment with the laws of both the physical and spiritual world.

People with this energy are often seen as reliable and responsible, setting high standards for themselves and those around them. Their sense of justice drives them to take responsibility seriously, whether in relationships, work, or personal matters. They thrive in situations where there is structure, law, and clarity, and they often pursue roles that require a strong ethical foundation, such as in legal or official capacities.

However, the energy of Justice can also become rigid if not balanced. These individuals may struggle with flexibility and may become overly principled or stubborn. Their focus on responsibility can lead them to overwork or become emotionally disconnected from others. It is important for them to find balance, allowing room for emotional expression and adaptability while maintaining their strong sense of justice and duty.

9. The Hermit

Arcanum 9, known as The Hermit, represents self-sufficiency, wisdom, and depth. Those with the energy of the Ninth Arcanum in the Character Zone are introspective and often prefer solitude. They are deep thinkers, constantly seeking knowledge and understanding of the world. Their inner world is rich, and they spend much of their time contemplating life's truths and complexities.

People with this energy are self-reliant and do not depend on others for validation or support. They value independence and may appear distant, but this is due to their focus on inner growth and wisdom. They are driven by a desire to uncover deeper meanings in life and often engage in intellectual or philosophical pursuits.

However, the energy of The Hermit can sometimes lead to isolation. These individuals may struggle to connect with others, believing that their depth of thought sets them apart. It is important for them to strike a balance between solitude and social interaction, allowing themselves to share their wisdom without becoming entirely withdrawn.

10. The Wheel of Fortune

Arcanum 10, known as The Wheel of Fortune, represents cycles, luck, and fate. Those with the energy of the Tenth Arcanum in the Character Zone are deeply connected to the flow of life and destiny. They are often seen as adaptable and open to change, understanding that life is full of ups and downs, and they are meant to ride these waves with ease.

People with this energy tend to go with the flow, trusting that life will take them where they need to be. They are often lucky and find themselves in favorable circumstances, seemingly by chance. However, they must learn to trust in this process and not resist the natural cycles of life. Their path is one of surrender to the greater forces at play, allowing fate to guide them.

At times, the energy of The Wheel of Destiny can lead to unpredictability. These individuals may struggle with control, wanting to direct their lives but needing to accept that much is beyond their influence. Finding peace in the uncertainty and embracing the cyclical nature of life is essential for their growth.

11. Strength

Arcanum 11, known as Strength, represents labor, energy, and effort. Those with the energy of the Eleventh Arcanum in the Character Zone are endowed with immense potential and power. They possess an extraordinary capacity for hard work and can achieve anything they set their mind to with dedication and effort. This strength is both their gift and their challenge, as it requires self-control and direction to prevent it from becoming overwhelming or destructive.

People with this energy are driven by a need to succeed through effort and hard work. They often face more demanding life tasks than others and are compelled to take on challenges that push them to their limits. Their strength manifests both physically and mentally, giving them the endurance to persist where others might give up. Elevens often thrive in roles that require leadership, responsibility, and the ability to motivate others.

However, the energy of Strength can become problematic if not channeled properly. When left unchecked, it can lead to aggression, domineering behavior, or even burnout. Elevens must learn to balance their energy by finding productive outlets for it, ensuring that their strength serves to uplift rather than oppress. This balance is crucial for their personal growth and fulfillment.

12. The Hanged Man

Arcanum 12 represents service, altruism, and creativity. Those with the energy of the Twelfth Arcanum in the Character Zone often find themselves drawn to helping others, sometimes at the expense of their own needs. They have a natural tendency toward self-sacrifice, often taking on the role of the giver or caretaker in relationships and life situations.

People with this energy feel a deep need to be of service, motivated by their strong sense of empathy and compassion. They may devote themselves to causes, volunteer work, or helping others in various ways. Their altruism is genuine, as they are often more focused on the well-being of others than their own personal gain.

However, the energy of Sacrifice can become complicated. In its negative expression, Twelves may adopt a "victim" mentality, feeling powerless or overly dependent on others. They might also become trapped in self-pity or martyrdom, struggling to balance their own needs with those of others. It is crucial for them to recognize their own worth and learn to say "no" when necessary, to avoid falling into patterns of self-neglect.

13. Death

Arcanum 13, known as Death, represents transformation, the end of the old, and the beginning of the new. Those with the energy of the Thirteenth Arcanum in the Character Zone are driven by constant change and the need to let go of the past to make way for new growth. They often experience several phases of transformation in their lives, embracing the idea of renewal and starting fresh.

People with this energy are natural transformers, capable of shedding their old ways, thoughts, and relationships to become something new. They thrive on change, and for them, it’s essential to release what no longer serves them to open up to new opportunities. This can make them appear mysterious and unique, as they are not afraid to embrace the unknown or move forward when others might hold back.

However, the energy of Death can also bring challenges. When out of balance, Thirteens may struggle with letting go, holding onto the past or clinging to material possessions and old memories. Their fear of change or attachment to the familiar can block their natural energy flow, leading to stagnation. Learning to accept endings as a necessary part of life and embracing the cycles of transformation is crucial for their growth.

14. Temperance

Arcanum 14 represents balance, harmony, and patience. Those with the energy of the Fourteenth Arcanum in the Character Zone are characterized by their calm demeanor, refined manners, and ability to find the middle ground in any situation. They are patient, tactful, and always strive for peace, preferring to take a measured approach to life.

People with this energy have an innate ability to stay grounded and avoid extremes. They value quality over quantity and prefer simplicity, whether in material possessions or relationships. Their life path often requires them to seek balance and compromise, patiently working through challenges rather than rushing or forcing solutions.

However, if out of balance, Fourteens may struggle with impatience, becoming argumentative or stubborn. They may lose their usual calm and find themselves overwhelmed by indecision or mood swings. To thrive, they must embrace their natural inclination toward harmony, learning to act with patience and moderation in all areas of life.

16. The Tower

Arcanum 16, known as The Tower, represents destruction, growth, and reconstruction. Those with the energy of the Sixteenth Arcanum in the Character Zone are destined for intense experiences, often facing abrupt changes or sudden upheavals. They live eventful lives, filled with challenges that force them to rebuild and adapt, whether in their careers, relationships, or personal endeavors.

People with this energy are natural builders and planners, always striving to create something substantial. However, they must also learn to accept that the structures they build, whether literal or metaphorical, may collapse unexpectedly. This constant need to rebuild teaches them resilience and the ability to grow from their trials. The Sixteenth Arcanum pushes individuals to embrace change, accept failure, and start anew with greater strength and insight.

However, if this energy is not balanced, Sixteens may struggle with fear of failure, avoid taking risks, or experience recurring losses. They might find themselves in a cycle of building only to see their efforts crumble. To thrive, they must embrace the process of growth, understanding that destruction is a necessary part of their path toward creating something stronger and more resilient.

18. The Moon

Arcanum 18, known as The Moon, represents genius, magic, and insanity. Those with the energy of the Eighteenth Arcanum in the Character Zone possess an extraordinary ability to manifest their thoughts into reality, for better or worse. This energy is deeply connected to mystery and illusion, as the Moon reveals hidden truths, unspoken fears, and subconscious desires.

People with this energy are often introverted and live in their own world of imagination and intuition. They are gifted with powerful creative and psychic abilities, but must be careful, as their fears and negative thoughts can also materialize. The key challenge for Eighteens is to gain mastery over their inner world and harness their magical abilities in a positive and constructive way.

If this energy is not controlled, it can lead to self-deception, illusions, or even destructive behavior. These individuals may struggle with mental instability or difficulty distinguishing between reality and their fears. However, when balanced, the energy of The Moon allows them to tap into profound wisdom, creativity, and spiritual insight, making them true visionaries in the world.

20. Judgement

Judgement symbolizes family, patriotism, and vocation. Those with the Energy of the Twentieth Arcanum in their Destiny Code Matrix are called to uphold honor, dignity, and family values. This energy is deeply connected to resolving ancestral karma, mending family ties, and restoring the bond between relatives. The ultimate goal for Twenties is to elevate their family line and fulfill a higher purpose tied to their lineage.

The Twentieth Arcanum is about purification and renewal, urging individuals to restore justice, preserve their homeland’s traditions, and remain devoted to their family and country. People with this energy must guard their family’s honor and never speak ill of their kin or homeland. Doing so weakens their energy, blocking their path in life and bringing harsh karmic trials.

Those with Judgement energy often find themselves as protectors and advocates for their family, standing firm in their principles. Their duty is to defend what is right, ensure justice is served, and bring unity to their family. They thrive when they devote themselves to a cause larger than themselves, making significant contributions to their family, community, or nation.

22. The Fool

The Fool represents freedom, spontaneity, and living in the present. People with this energy are often open-hearted, optimistic, and full of childlike wonder. They are unbound by societal expectations, living their lives in the "here and now" without overthinking consequences. Their approach to life is often light-hearted, and they tend to see the world through the lens of innocence and joy, preferring simplicity over complexity.

The Fool, however, can struggle with responsibility, making them vulnerable to being easily manipulated or caught in negative situations like addiction or recklessness. Their love for freedom and thrill can sometimes lead them astray, causing financial and personal instability. Despite these challenges, Fools can live incredibly fulfilling lives when they learn to balance their free spirit with some form of structure or grounding.

In relationships, they value independence and are often drawn to partners who allow them to roam freely without heavy obligations. They seek playful, light, and passionate relationships but can easily walk away if they feel restricted. Their karmic lesson is to learn to enjoy freedom without hurting others, remain grounded in reality while maintaining their joyful nature, and embrace responsibility when necessary.

TikTok - Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

You seem like an incredibly well read person, plus someone with a lot of insight into intimacy because of your work. So, in light of your romance book reviews, which are an absolute highlight on your patreon, do you have any insight into what is needed/suggested for a good romance novel?

g o d this is so fucking hard and also really fun to chew on. I want to preface this by saying this is ENTIRELY subjective and based completely on what I *PERSONALLY* find that I enjoy in a romance. this isn't, like, an objective guide on how to write a romance that doesn't suck. that doesn't exist because people like different things, and I'm speaking from one perspective.

also I should say that my preferred flavor of romance novel is solidly contemporary. I haven't read many historicals, certainly not enough to opine well on them, I don't do those mafia dark romances or whatever the fuck, and I've barely dabbled at all in any kind of fantasy romance, whether they're full high fantasy or witchy urban fantasy stories. (although I'm about to do one of the latter next month, you can vote for a book on my patreon rn!)

having gotten all of those caveats out of the way, here's some shit I like and dislike:

there are exceptions to this but broadly, I prefer a POV for everyone involved in the relationship. to me a romance where we're only seeing events from the POV of one member of the relationship automatically makes it seem like one person matters more in a dynamic where everyone should be of equal importance. also, god, if the plot's really going to hinge on not knowing what's going on in one partner's head suggests that miscommunication is going to be a pretty critical part of the plot, and I hate that shit. TALK TO EACH OTHER. I'LL KILL YOU.

on that note, there needs to be an actual compelling reason why the characters can't be together, okay? the #1 driving tension of every romance is "why the fuck can't they be together yet" and you BETTER have a good answer. whether it's interpersonal or external forces, if there's a very easy solution to what's keeping them apart then your characters look dumb and I'm bored. one of the most frustrating romances I've ever read involved two characters who were mutually attracted to each from the JUMP, who refused to act on it because they were coworkers (neither of them in any position of authority of the other, nothing unprofessional or inappropriate about it) and they were "only" living in the same state for A YEAR. A FULL YEAR !!! shut up. get a grip and kiss each other.

now, having said that: whatever your bullshit reason is for these two characters to be interacting with each other, you need to COMMIT to that shit so hard that I, the reader, will feel silly for even questioning the logic. the worst offender I've ever seen on this front is D'Vaughn and Kris Plan a Wedding, which pulls its protagonists together via a reality TV competition and then just... promptly loses any interest in really dealing with the actual realities of being filmed 24/7? it's insanely distracting how little the book engages with its central hook, and was a huge point deduction for me. whereas you have, like, The Bride Test, a book with a premise that skirts dangerously close to a little bit of human trafficking but embraces the whole premise so wholeheartedly that you completely forget about the potentially horrific elements in there. who cares that Esme was bribed here with the promise of a green card if she seduces a man she's never met? there's whimsy happening! we've moved on! it's literally fine and she's in no danger except the danger of a BROKEN HEART.

this one is going to seem SO obvious but like. I need them to be actually like each other. I'm not saying they can't be mutually bitchy while they grow to like each other or anything, they don't have to always be NICE to each other, but there are so many M/F romances where the dude is just flat out fucking MEAN and condescending to the girl until he decides he wants to fuck her. and sometimes even after that! stop it! after a certain point I don't want her to fuck him I want her to run him over a car!!!! there's suuuuch a line between "guy I butt heads and exchange banter with but could fuck if we just got to know each other" and "man who hates me and is for real fucking bullying me."

"kisses only," "doors closed," whatever term they use for a romance novel without any sex scenes on page, I don't like it. listen: I know that they're not everybody's cup of tea, and I FULLY recognize that a lot of romance novel sex scenes are unfathomably cringe. and yet, I need them. partly because they're funny, but also because if this book wants me to be invested in the developing relationship between two adults who are supposed to be WILDLY sexually attracted to each other, then I want to see the damn sex. no matter how many bad similes or unfortunate adjectives it entails. and if you're not going to show me the sex, don't you dare have the characters gushing about how great it is. I'll be the judge of that, thank you very much. (I'm looking at you, Sorry, Bro.)

related: there's this thing that I call "Horny Wolf Syndrome," which is derived from this tweet:

initially I used it to refer to when previously sweet-tempered male romance protags inexplicably started talking like horny wovles during sex scenes - "LET ME SEE YOUR PRETTY CUNT ON MY COCK" and the like - but now I more generally use it to refer to scenarios in which characters of any gender completely dispense with their established personality while they fuck in order to fulfill a more broadly appealing, one-size-fits-all sexual fantasy. I hate that shit; if your characters act like completely unrecognizable people during sex, you didn't write very strong characters. one of my favorite things about writing sex scenes is that it's so SO interesting to see how their the characters' personal quirks translate into a setting that's very different from most other contexts, and it's deeply disappointing when authors take the easy route in favor of some pornhub dialogue.

one of the things that actually won my most recent read, Raiders of the Lost Heart, a HUGE amount of points with me was how frank the female lead was about initiating sex for the first time. it was completely in character for her and felt really different than any other book I've read, and honestly? it was a breath of fresh air.

[aduckwithears]

I was so distracted by the Bentley playing Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy as Crowley raced back to the bookshop this season that it didn't occur to me that we'd been in this position before.

Spat with Aziraphale?

Check.

Threatened by demons?

Check.

Rushing back to the Bookshop with the Bentley playing something overly romantic?

Check and check.

Friends, it is ENTIRELY POSSIBLE that Crowley was having major flashbacks to the bookshop burning and Aziraphale being gone, which is why he was setting new records for the drive through central London. Maybe everyone else already thought about this but I didn't until right now and I am not ok.