#cba to list em all

[dilutedh2so4]

Oenone had the gift of prophecy, she knew what would happen from the start, and yet she still loved Paris for the time she had with him. The main reason she sent out Corythus (to guide the Achaeans to Troy / to plot against Helen / to seduce her) is because her father had taunted her about having “lost” Paris to a “more beautiful” woman.

It varies with her intent in not healing her husband (Lycophron says his wound was incurable; Parthenius makes her still set out to save him just after rejecting the messenger; Quintus gives her that whole speech wholeheartedly spurning him; Conon has her praying for him to be wounded and forced to come back to her) yet the stories all end the same. After hearing of Paris’ demise, Oenone ends her life - out of grief, or regret, or both. Morbidly, this is the one of the few consistent things about her portrayals.

Oenone loved Paris even after all he had done, that she would go so far as to lose her will to live when he died.

[ghoultrifle]

Ghost on Taskmaster !!

Copia is Alex Horne and you cannot convince me otherwise. Awkward rat boy who's subservient to his master? Yeah, rings a bell.

Honestly I don't think any of the papas have the right vibes to be the taskmaster, in my mind it's Omega. Big, strong, kinda mean and takes no shit.

Okay now here's my ghoul-by-ghoul analysis on what kind of contestant they'd be and which past contestant i'd compare them to !!

Aether - Definitely a Jo Brand or Julian Clary. Couldn't give less of a shit, just here for the free food tbh. Will occasionally try but can't be fucked to do anything physical. Everyone loves him for it, too.

Cirrus - Kiell Smith-Bynoe. Ultra competitive, has beef with another contestant (Rain). Effortlessy hilarious in everything she does.

Aurora - Charlotte Ritchie. Dressed appropriately (dungarees). Tries really hard but doesn't always succeed. Very optimistic though :)

Mountain - A mix of Bob Mortimer and Mark Watson. He's a prize task extraordinaire with hundreds of unbelievable (but true) stories. Will also get bullied by the Taskmaster though.

Phantom - Lucy Beaumont and Judi Love vibes. Just doesn't seem to understand what the fuck is going on at any point. A good laugh though and will always fight for points.

Sunny - James Acaster. She's chaos incarnate ("My eyes are circles?"). You think it's a character but as time goes on you begin to question that assumption ajskldfkh.

Rain - Mae Martin. Gay and good at it. No notes.

Cumulus - Al Murray. She's focused but also really cheeky. Always looking for loopholes. Will throw money at the tasks like it's nobody's business.

Dewdrop - Nish Kumar or Katherine Parkinson. People think he's going to be a half decent contestant, but he's actually incredibly shit at everything. Gets annoyed frequently.

Swiss - Ed Gamble. Once again very competitive and will throw a fit if he doesn't win. Can also laugh at himself but secretly dies inside when he does badly on a task. A great podcast host for the after-show interviews.

tagging people who expressed even the tiniest bit of interest so this incredibly niche post doesn't flop @sphylor, @thesunhatesme, @chapel-of-rizztual, @ghouletteanon, @cheerycherrycandy-resurrected, @mikorsghouls

Thank you for listening, have some homoeroticism :)

[apollo-likes-writing]

Some tips for my fellow fanfic writers who like to write with the Call of Duty lads! I'm not in the military myself (next year I'm going in the army as a combat medic tho) but I come from a military family. Older brother has served in the RAF for 12 years, my ex-stepdad for 22. My biological father served in the US Army and one of my mums was military police. I know a fair amount of shit that goes on (not saying I know everything though. I definitely don't). I'm gonna write a list of the stuff I have read in COD fiction that I've read that isn't entirely accurate and how to make them accurate. If you got any questions feel free to ask! Can't say I'll be able to answer everything though.

Please note that I'm mainly going to be using my knowledge about the Air Force and the Army in the UK. Some things I talk about may be different between the branches so take what I say with a pinch of salt.

Male and female accommodation are separated and if someone is found in the opposite sex's accommodation for any reason (with the exception of maintenance) there will be SERIOUS consequences (like you can get kicked out the military for that shit).

If any SA happens in the military and is brought to court it does NOT go down well. If the accused is guilty it's an immediate dishonourable discharge (and you don't want that because then your pension and shit you've worked for will go down the drain).

I've seen this in a lot of fics with König and Ghost and it really annoys me but Colonel is a higher rank than Lieutenant by a long shot. Like by five ranks (which doesn't sound like a lot but a colonel is one below a brigadier and those guys are fucking evil I swear).

Linked to the above but higher ranking officers do not call lower ranking officers by Sir or Ma'am. Being called that is a compliment and is to be payed by lower ranks when talking to higher ranks. If a high ranking officer talks to a low ranking officer, they'll call them by their rank or their last name/callsign.

Relationships between officers and their subordinates is basically a court marshall in the military if you're not careful. Unless you can prove that the relationship can work out (doesn't usually work) they'll usually move the couple into different sections/squads to keep them separated so they don't become hindered by personal issues. Either that or they'll kick em out. Relationships between two officers is very very very vaguely okay but is still very much frowned upon.

There is a funky term the military use to describe people between the ranks of Lance Corporal and Warrant Officer called "NCO". It's an acronym that stands for "Non-Comissioned Officer". If you're not commissioned that means you're not to be saluted because only commissioned officers can be saluted. Remember that people aren't saluting the person, they're saluting the cap badge on their beret because (if we use the UK as an example) the commission is given by the reigning monarch and you're saluting them instead as a sign of respect. Soap and Gaz are examples of NCOs because they're both Sergeants!

If you're caught bullying someone in the military you'll be immediately kicked out the military within the day so don't even try it.

SAS soldiers are medically trained even if they weren't a combat medic before they signed up for it. Every single member of the SAS is able to perform emergency first aid.

There's actually a bunch of Special Forces in the UK! One is the SAS which we've all heard of but another example is SBS (there's more but I cba to explain all of them). They are of the exact same calibre as the SAS except they're the naval version. They specialise in aquatic shit. There's also the Paratroopers (the guys who jump out of planes and are generally super badass) and the Commandos (also badass, but usually without the plane jumping), as well as a bunch of other acronyms that you're gonna have to research yourself because I can NOT remember them all.

Whenever you enter the Mess (the official name for the canteen or dining hall) headdress of any kind must be taken off as a sign of respect. It's basic mess etiquette. As well as this, you aren't supposed to go on your phone. Also, do not under any circumstances disrespect the chefs. You will regret it immediately. If we go back to the first point though even though Ghost, König, Horanji and all the other mask-wearing folks hide their faces, they're still supposed to remove their masks when they enter. So maybe adapt that into your stories by instead getting a companion of theirs to get food for them!

Sort of links to the above point, but whenever you're at a military base and you're outside, you need to put headdress on. It's compulsory. If they're in civilian clothing they don't (and it's discouraged) but if they're in their in uniform they're supposed to have their berets on.

With the exception of mask-wearing people probably, whenever you go inside you're supposed to take your berets off.

Lower ranks stand to attention when talking to a higher rank as a sign of respect.

You're supposed to be super polite to officers, so if for whatever reason you need to speak your mind or elaborate an idea you can say "Permission to speak freely/bluntly." If your officer is being a dick you can say "Please excuse the tone Sir/Ma'am, but..." but try not to because they'll probably be even more of a dick to you afterwards.

Gambling is a literal no-go unless you're off-duty and off base.

If military personnel go to an event such as a wedding or funeral, they are able to wear their formal parade uniform (if that's the correct term. Please correct me if I'm wrong). Also if someone is receiving a medal they'll also wear their formal shit with the rest of their medals. They would NOT wear civilian stuff like dresses or tuxedos.

This is first aid related but if someone is stabbed do NOT take the weapon out because that thing is the only thing keeping the casualty alive cuz it's blocking up the hole. Take it out and they'll bleed out in seconds.

Salute every officer within 2 meters/6ft of you unless you yourself are not wearing your headdress. If you aren't (e.g you're inside. You're supposed to stand to attention.

If you go inside and you go into an officers office, you put your beret on before you go in and salute them at the door. When you leave you salute them again, leave, take your beret off and go about your day.

If there are multiple officers in one room and you enter, when saluting you need to look at whoever has the highest rank in the room. In most cases in COD fics it'll be to Price, König or Alejandro.

Captain is a lower rank than Colonel.

Officers salute higher ranking officers. E.g- Ghost would salute Price but Price would salute Alejandro if they're deciding to be formal for some fucking reason.

When you salute an officer, the officer should salute back as a way of accepting the compliment.

During official parades, officers carry fucking SWORDS (I'm not joking, look it up).

Punctuality-wise, if you're early to something, you're on time. If you're on time, you're late and if you're late I will send flowers to your gravestone.

Damn this was long. If you got any questions feel free to drop them in my inbox! I'm always happy to answer queries about them. Please reblog so more people can see this!

[what-if-doctor-who-was-yuri-yaoi]

OK HOES IM BACK AT IT AGAIN

i am triweilding hyperfixations rn (dnd, bg3 + hwfwm) so i decided that it would be fun to smoosh them all together into a fucking mess so i proudly present: a shitty jason asano char sheet for dnd (w a ver for bg3 bc the subclass isnt in bg3 (might need to change spells idk havent checked)) (also this is just for mechanics i would reccomed speaking to ur dm if u wanna add flavour items also idk how the equipment would go w bg3 so) this is not in the same order he gets his powers (aka he takes the mage hand cantrip even tho the powers it emulates (shadow hands and physical soul) dont come till book 4 and also he gets revival ish powers at level 6 just ignore it dnd has diff balance to hwfwm its no biggie heres how you make it!

first step: we r gonna take the high elf for the powers BUT we r gonna reflavour it so he looks human

for the cantrip w r gonna take message to emulate his vc power

then we take a background: urchin! (but change 👏 the 👏 flavour 👏)

this is mainly for the proficiencies and also the mouse which we r gonna reflavour as a colin leech (ask ur dm)

u can drop all the other flavour items or ask if u can change em since yk the lore dont add up if ur playing jason fr

now time for ability scores since here u go:

str: 8 (-1)

dex: 13+2 = 15 (+2)

con: 14 (+2)

int: 10+1 = 11 (0)

wis: 12 (+1)

cha: 15 (+2)

step four is to choose a class so im going with warlock since 1: i like it 2: its a spellsword form level 1 just like jason 4: the flavour is nice

ok time for the good stuff:

start by grabing arcana and deception as ur class skills (replace one w stealth and maybe sleight of hand too if u didnt take urchin)

equipment: any simple weapon, an arcane focus, a scholar's pack, Leather armor, any simple weapon, and two daggers

(u can take whatever simple weapon u want or maybe even ask ur dm for a sword (short or long bc u get those proficiencies from high elf)

next we wanna take the undying subclass for all its nifty death defying undead fucking powers

(if ur playing bg3 or ur dm wont let you use SCAG content then take the great old one)

now for the spells and cantrips:

cantrips at first level we r gonna grab will be mage hand and poison spray (on top of message (high elf) and spare the dying (undying))

spells will be hex and comprehend languages

at second level we grab the armour of shadows and eyes of the rune keeper eldritch invocations, grab arms of hadar, and dump comprehend languages for cause fear

third level is time for the pact boon! take pact of the blade (though if u really want a familiar take pact of the chain instead) (some ei's we take have potb as a prequisite so then just pyf) and also misty step

level four we r gonna take the skulker feat (or +2 cha if u arent using optional feats) as well as finally picking up eldritch blast (it doesnt suit the flavour ik it makes him worse but it also makes him quirkyer) and also grabbing ray of enfeeblement

level 5 we grab ray of sickness (undying expanded spell list) or if not then remove curses and also the one with shadows invocation

level 6 we grab vampiric touch

level 7 you wanna take blight and grab the thrsting bade invocation (pyf if u didnt take potb)

level 8 we r grabbing +2 charisma and also dimension door

level 9 its contagion (hold monster for u tgoo guys) and also theif of five fates invocation

level 10 blade ward babyyy

level 11 darkness + circle of death mystic anacrum

level 12 take lifedrinker and another +2 charisma

level 13 grab counterspell and finger of death mystic anacrum

after that youre on ur own kid bc i cba to take it into the realms of trully unbalanced

feel free to use this (lmk how it goes havent tested it yet) and change anything up (id love some feedback!!!)

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Tommy

Ali: I am SO glad this holiday centres around drinking beyond reason

Tommy: Me too, like, But why are you?

Ali: I wouldn’t even wanna get into it if it weren’t for the fact I couldn’t with her

Ali: Obvious clue is obvious

Tommy: Oh darling, Kitty, what’s she done now?

Ali: It’s not even what she’s done

Ali: It’s her total lack of desire to try

Ali: I know I shouldn’t take it personally and it’s symptomatic of the bigger picture

Ali: But that’s the problem, it’s so hard to watch, to see it so clearly when she has no front to put up

Tommy: Yeah, it always puts a lovely, thick layer of extra dread onto my homecoming

Tommy: the regularly scheduled updates are bad enough & it’s not like I can do more for being back under the same roof

Ali: Oh God, please don’t start, it’s like no one wants to be here, pure depressing, like

Ali: That’s how I ended up feeling, it wasn’t like she wanted to come but you know, anxiety, strangers etc

Ali: Because my suggestions to alleviate those problems were shot STRAIGHT down

Ali: So she just doesn’t want to

Ali: but not just that, I should feel like shit for going and leaving her alone...which put like that, should I? I don’t even know now

Tommy: Honey, fuck that! I’ve had to veto Fi going full Elphaba on all our faces so that diva maybe this close to not, but there’s no stopping me, Will, Gwen or Steph 🥳🥳🥳

Tommy: she’s getting worse, I dunno what any of us are meant to do

Tommy: other than being certain that I’m not gonna let you have an utter shit time

Tommy: That’s what she wants, that way you’ll stay with her forever 💀🥀🕷🕸

Ali: Nice to hear some genuine enthusiasm, which is fecking ridiculous considering this is apparently every fucker’s fave holiday as standard, I swear everyone but Da is in a right mood atm

Ali: Thank God that everyone’s gotta let tourists be tourists for the 💸🤑 or your mates would need some serious babysitting 😏

Ali: Little green men is fully my groupies’ aesthetic so you’re welcome to out yourself any time, like

Ali: I dunno, I mean, she’ll be alright won’t she? It’s a fairly long sesh, I know…

Ali: Hence my life’d be a lot easier if she’d come for a bit but there we go

Tommy: My honoured guests have got it in spades & buckets tbh 🧶🧚‍♀️🍀🎩🌈 dress up is already well underway just can’t let ‘em also start 🚗💣🍺🥃 or they won’t last to see it in

Tommy: cba to stick in it a 🍼 you know

Tommy: how many groupies you got now? Only 👏 while it’s still underground, avant-garde & super niche, naturally

Tommy: What’s she got planned? Other than putting a 💔 hex on you and Carls

Ali: Sensible

Ali: And not in a scrooge debbie downer kinda way

Ali: Found out the tents for yous to sleep in but I’m taking ‘em out first

Ali: 🌄 are calling, obvs

Ali: Naturally 🙄 just don’t click instead that shit is TOO pretentious even for your lot

Ali: She said she was WELL busy, but you know, the usual I imagine 📚💭

Ali: Drew won’t pay her no attention way too busy with the tourists etc 💸🤑

Tommy: 👍 cheers 😸👼 you are

Tommy: 🍀 are calling, is what you mean

Tommy: 🙄 be a waste of a 🙏 I know it’s 1 of her other highly rated activities, like, but still, I don’t need to imagine the two of ‘em getting together rn

Ali: They make NO sense

Ali: Unless his thing is dating a girl like his sister, in place of the standard wanting a mum 2.0, which understandably is not his vibe

Ali: Suspect don’t cover it but we’ll see

Tommy: It’d make more sense if I dumped Will for Fi & suss wouldn’t cover that & that’s a NO from us all

Tommy: Excuse you whore! That’s Meena slander

Ali: You know what I mean though

Ali: Where did this come from, like 🤯

Tommy: 🤯 over straight boy behaviour since forever

Ali: I usually find them so boringly easy

Ali: not the brag it sounds

Ali: I’d rather get her again… I’d know what to do, before

Ali: It was safety, for her and us

Tommy: Before she would’ve followed you anywhere, you can’t keep her safe if she ain’t even gonna try to meet you halfway at anything

Ali: Like you said, nothing to be done, I suppose

Ali: At least today

Ali: I’m going to mass with her, she’s helping to set up, it’s something

Tommy: & I’ll squeeze in a 1 on 1 for me & her before I leave 🩰👒🎹🎤✨

Ali: Tah

Ali: If only getting people to spend time with her was the issue

Ali: Be fully booked if she wanted

Tommy: But like you said, it’s something & if anyone can talk her out of an unsuitable romance, it’s me 🧚🏼‍♂️

Tommy: don’t have your track record

Tommy: there’s at least a chance she’ll take my advice about doing better than a dealer 🤞 now I’ve got myself the “happy ending” of decent hair & only petty crime

Ali: None of my romances have been unsuitable

Ali: You underestimate how discerning her taste is when it comes to other people’s partners

Ali: He might not be Carly levels of demon but don’t mean you’ll find a nice word to be said, like

Tommy: put your claws away, Kit, talking Ro’s POV, Carls is my angel

Tommy: & I guarantee I’ve heard worse than she can dish from the other bitchy ballerinas who couldn’t get their 💅 in first

Tommy: simply not quaking, sorry

Ali: Just saying, if it were that easy, it’d be done by now

Tommy: just saying, I’ve not taken a turn yet

Ali: If there’s any day for luck…

Ali: It ain’t one where she’s decided to be in the worst mood ❌🍀

Tommy: I’ve only got the weekend, like

Ali: I understand her a bit better than that tah

Ali: as well as the appeal of prohibition

Ali: the more everyone weighs in on her being wrong, the more bolstered she feels in how right she actually is

Ali: one fuckboy mistake she’ll have to learn from

Tommy: & I don’t? PLEASE 🙄 No notes needed for this performance

Ali: She always gets worse when Bea comes back

Ali: I’ll be the one dealing when you all fuck off again

Tommy: I know

Tommy: so let me deal with her this time, Will, Gwen & Fi have all been here enough & they’ve got each other

Ali: Sorry, the moods catching

Tommy: She can run but the house ain’t grown any new hiding places & I remember ‘em all

Ali: She’s still small enough to fit in all the gaps and cracks, you less so

Ali: Anything is worth a shot

Ali: The party will be enough, loads of my mates are coming, yours won’t get bored 🤞

Tommy: True but when she gets in one she ain’t got the strength to get to another quick as I can 🐁🩰

Tommy: yeah, yeah the party don’t stop when I walk out, I know ☹️😏

Tommy: & Carls isn’t just my angel, she’ll save that bit of the day if needs

Ali: Tourists love St Paddy’s

Ali: and no one does it better than da

Tommy: if I were gonna disagree it’d only be to annoy him

Ali: @ the family group chat for that hilarious bants, Tommo

Tommy: 🐻👈

Tommy: 1st time I’ve used those not as a euphemism? Oh definitely

Ali: Please, you’re a couple of 🧚🏼‍♂️🧚🏼‍♂️s

Tommy: Tah, Darling

Tommy: flattery will get you an invite to the next teddy bears picnic

Ali: Bit rude to Carly that you think that’s my type

Ali: no 🧔s here

Tommy: It’s not me trying drive a wedge, she’s invited too

Ali: Thoughtful 😏

Tommy: You shall go to the ball

Ali: Glass shoes is an idea… 🤔

Tommy: One way to keep hold of your drink or stop a fight

Ali: Me and my shoes are keeping well out of any more fights, fuck that

Tommy: What is your outfit plan then?

Ali: I’ve got all the material to construct it now, I think

Ali: See what it comes out like 🤷‍♀️✨

Tommy: Fi don’t believe you can top last year’s

Ali: I love a challenge and a chance to impress, obviously

Tommy: chop chop 😼

Tommy: shameless distraction tactic I’m throwing at you, who?

Ali: Christ knows I’m running out of time with the to-do list never ending, hey ho

Tommy: Same tbh

Tommy: we’d better get back to it 🧹🎃

Ali: Fuck being a middle kid, right? 💔

Tommy: Honestly

Ali: You know what you’re getting Rocky yet, speaking of the little shit

Tommy: Probably that bow with the glowing arrows that stick to windows & shit, he keeps seeing the ad & reckons they’ll fly over the house

Ali: Alright, going for 🥇 sib, fair play 👏

Tommy: Sure you’ll have me beat with whatever you’re planning

Ali: I’ll think of something

Ali: Once this is all out the way

Ali: If ma will let us, we’ll take him camping with his 🏹

Tommy: Once all the 🍬🍫🧁🎂🧃 hits she’ll be glad to be rid

Ali: not the baby though 🙄

Tommy: thank god for daddy’s girl, yeah?

Tommy: you’ll never lose that 👑

Ali: try as you might, yeah yeah 😉

Tommy: 😏

[puppetsoftomorrow]

tagged by @ginger-canary sorry it took me like ten years to do it!! 

playlist shuffle rules: hit shuffle on your media player and write down the first 20 then tag 10 people, no skipping!

okay so i’m using my cowboy songs yee haw playlist for this so. its all gonna be country. i don’t listen exclusively to country. but its gonna be a lot of country lmao

don’t cry joni - conway twitty

is anyone going to san antone? - charley pride (not at the moment king theres a fucking pandemic)

how could i love her so much - johnny rodriguez 

set em up joe - vern gosdin

skip a rope - henson cargill

don’t call me your only sunsine - the kendalls

san antonio stroll - tanya tucker 

pick me up on your way down - charlie walker

lost highway - johnny horton

if you’re gonna do me wrong, do it right - vern gosdin

pretty belinda - chris andrews

the end of the world - carpenters 

i wouldn’t change you if i could - ricky skaggs

waltzing mathilda - slim dusty

stand by your man - tammy wynette

don’t squeeze my sharmon - charlie walker

some broken hearts never mend - don walker (an all time fave tbh)

how can i unlove you - amber digby

poor folks town - porter wagoner, dolly parton

sunflower - glen campbell

list 10 songs i’ve been listening to lately

lots of glen campbell recently with yesterday when i was young, less of me and mary in the morning, then some things from my playlist of songs reccomended to me by u guys, especially die from a broken heart and hole in the bottle

then five more so we’ll go with -

texas when i die - tanya tucker

the masters call - marty robbins

abilene - bobby bare

roll muddy river - george hamilton iv

sea of heartbreak - don gibson

(not doing the albulm question idk what albulms are lmao)

cba to tag so if u wanna do it, you should! assume i tagged u lmao. then tag me!! i should expand my music taste!!

[ghostsandmirrors]

"Bucky! What are numbers 3, 7, 9, 13, and 27, on your playlist? Those are all lucky numbers, by the way 😉"

Muse Music Association!

"Don't know why you're askin' me; I didn't pick 'em."

I took this meme to be ooc so... answer pog. You literally got the least interesting ones, though. Could've gotten I'll Be Good by Jaymes Young, but instead we have;

3 - Bad Guy by 3OH!3

7 - Fake Happy by Paramore

9 - Gasoline by Halsey

13 - I'm a Wanted Man by Royal Deluxe

27 - Everything I Wanted by Billie Eilish

---

3 Just because of this fanvid, ngl. It's a really good fanvid, though. I know I said I was excluding fanvids but it's the song, the reason is just this one really good fanvid. Also I can't be bothered to look up the lyrics and start analysing but this is the only time I'm being lazy.

7 Depression. That's it. That's the reason. It's mostly the overall vibe and specifically the chorus, especially, 'don't ask me how I've been/don't make me play pretend' because do you think this man has ever answered 'hey! how've you been?!' honestly? Of fuckin course he hasn't. This ties very much into Everything I Wanted's reason so just know all depression songs are connected.

9 'You can't wake up, this is not a dream/you're part of a machine, you are not a human being.' I know Halsey lyrics on rp accounts became a meme back in 2015 because they were fuckin everywhere, but this one works for him.

Like, I could easily write an entire essay about Bucky's canonical treatment both with HYDRA and after HYDRA and how much he is dehumanised not only by the 'villains' but also his allies? And how the narrative just doesn't fuckin care and treats it as normal and right even while the character himself seems bothered by it? And I started to the other day but I forgot to add 'canonical' so it didn't read correctly... but I'm not going to do that right now. Just know I have a lot of angry feelings and Gasoline works for Bucky.

13 Fanvids strike back. This one in particular. It is also just a song that really describes him, though; between TWS and CACW he is a wanted man. SHIELD wants him, HYDRA wants him, Steve wants him, Sam probably wants to charge a bill to him for that fuckin steering wheel... but also there's a lot of lyrics that work outside of that, including shit like, 'the law ain’t never been a friend of mine,' and 'I've got blood on my hands.'

Again, I could write an essay. I'm not going to for the sake of brevity, but I could and that threat is going to hang over everyone.

Also this: 'If you ask me to change/I don’t know if I can,' which I know is a giant red flag but I associate it in a non-red flag way of just, 'yer man will never fully unlearn the training and lessons and TFATWS can fuck off pretending otherwise; I will fight Marvel.'

27 Depression V2: Electric Boogaloo.

Sebastian Stan once said that the only reason Bucky hasn't kermit sewer side is because of Steve and... this is a song about someone having a dream where they kermit sewer side and in the dream no one cares... and I'm just saying, it fits. Again, this has been vaguely looked at before (this edit) but not in a proper way? I'm just creating a To-Do list of essays to write, aren't I? Fuck.

But anyway, Bucky Barnes is depressed, the only reason--at the time of CACW--he hadn't kermit sewer side was Steve's existence and the entire song is about maybe kinda wanting to die but also having someone who'll cling to your very being to keep you going and that's why I hardcore ship Stucky. Welcome to my TED Talk; the essays are here--

that's a joke, I cba with that.

---

yaaay happy happy fun times.

[hotdogjumpingfrog5]

Another tag

Rules: answer 20 questions then tag 20 bloggers that you want to get to know better

I was tagged by @eddie-toziier

Thanks :)

Name: Emma

Nicknames: Don’t rlly have one, though Em, Ems, I will go by

Height: 5′5″

Sexual Orientation: Straight

Nationality: Canadian (Half Russian/Irish-Canadian, there are Polish/Austrian/German in there too)

Favorite Fruit: Oranges or mangoes 

Favorite Season: Autumn

Favorite Plant: Lavender, Roses, Lilacs, Sunflowers

Favorite Scent: your mum (jk, i really like the smell of lilacs, lavender, burning firewood, and wet grass after a rain shower)

Favorite Color: Yellow

Favorite Animal: Owl

Coffee, Tea, Or Hot Chocolate: Hot chocolate and tea

Average Sleep Hours: 6-8 hours

Dog Or Cat Person: Cat

Favorite Fictional Character: I have more than one favourite fictional character is this a trick question 

Number Of Blankets You Sleep With: 1

Dream Trip: UK, NYC, South Africa, Australia, Netherlands, Russia (there’s more I just cba to list them all)

Blog Created: December 

Number Of followers: 743

Random Fact: I’m hot that is all (writing this at 12:30 am so idkkk)

i tag: @prongs-mileven @mileven-and-contemplation @caseyk112  @richie-tozier-posts @reddie-to-mileven-it @steves-bisexual-hair @evieismissing @freshxbloom @theloooosersclub @bitchin-promises @princess-chocolate-drop @bubblynancy @nancy--theslut--wheeler @snack-that-smiles-back-goldfish @creamy-brown-eyes @ghostbuster-henderson + too lazy too add more but anyone else who wants to do it/that I may forgot to tag

[hey-heichou-suz]

Top 10 Female Character Tag >.<

I was tagged by @attack-on-stalking​ (the best bean)

Rules: list 10 of your favorite female characters from 10 different fandoms and tag 10 people) (I put pictures on so it’s under the cut ;) )

1) Attack on Titan - Hanji(Hange) 

2) Tales of Xillia - Milla

3) Persona - Futaba

4) Legend of Zelda - Zelda 

5) Final Fantasy - Princess Garnet/Dagger

6) Life is Strange - Chloe

7) Kingdom Hearts - Kairi 

8) Tokyo Ghoul - Touka

9) Noragami - Hiyori

10) Corpse Party - Seiko 

Ok, that’s em all ;) I tag @noodlesforlyfe​ @shinjekinootp​ @kraium​ @summer129​ @margri3t​ @theredstarassassin​ @yanderr02​ and anyone else, fuck it - say I tagged ya. I cba with anymore :’)

[awful-roffle-archive]

Music Shuffle

My bae @kimmmygibbbler didn't tag me (dick) so w/e im tagging myself also im not find in links for these so look 'em up ur self br0

1) Island of Yours - Social Repose

Good song, highly recommend. Can't believe he actually shaved his head.

2) All My Friends Say - Cimorelli

Good song but one of the more annoying ones on my playlist because I cba to clean it out, listened to it too many times

3) My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark - Fall out Boy

What, did you not expect any FOB songs on this list? Pft

4) Elevator - David Archuleta

Good song, dunno where it came from. More mellow and guitar-y. Probably something from my discover weekly.

5) Neverland - VanLadyLove

No idea where this came from?? Good song so w/e Ig. Love song I think, sounds like it anyways lmao

6) You're the Voice - John Farnham

Of course the one time I put Spotify on shuffle to skip through it gives me all the songs I actually wanna hear, smh. Oldie but goodie.

7) Home - Maccabeats

a heckin JAM highly recommend, sing out loud every time 👌

8) Back Home - Andy Grammer

Probably another discover weekly one idk where it came from iDkK

9) i hate u, i love u - gnash, Olivia O'Brien

p sure this one was recommended by @simuus !! anyways, another love song type deal I believe

10) Blame It On The Night - Don't Blame It On Me

👏👏👏👏 BLAME IT ON THE NIIIIGHT 👏👏👏👏

[skillzme]

Ad Blocker and Why Google Wants to Build Its Own [Infographic]

Google has reportedly created��its own ad blocker—an "ad filter"—for Chrome and will launch it next year. That may leave marketers and brands wondering how ad blockers are used today, how Google fits in, and what it all might mean for their ads.

"I know what you did in your last Marketing campaign, do you?" Those questions and more are answered in today's infographic by Internet marketing agency TechWyse. The first ad-blocker was released in 2002, the infographic explains on a timeline of the technology. Fast-forward over a decade, and browsers, as well as users, have implemented ad blockers in widespread ways. Ad-blocking means lost revenue for publishers, but the reasons people use ad blockers are clear and mostly avoidable. The infographic cites the data: 35% of users who block ads do so because the ads are "annoying," yet 60% of people would turn off ad blockers in return for receiving content. Ad blocking can be a complex problem for marketers, so check out the infographic to see what's going on in the industry, how it may affect your brand, and what you can do about it All You Need To Know About Google’s Built-In Adblock For Chrome According to the latest report by the Wall Street Journal, Google is planning to introduce an ad-blocking feature in the mobile and desktop versions of Chrome web browser. This feature can be switched on by default within Chrome and can filter out certain ad types which may provide a bad experience for the users as they scroll through the page. Ad blockers, which are also known as content blockers, are a simple software designed to prevent advertisements from being shown on websites. It is one of the fastest growing phenomena in internet usage. They are typically browser add-ons which are available for Chrome, Firefox, Opera, Safari and Internet Explorer web browser. Pop-up ads are one of the least preferred ad experiences by mobile users, according to an extensive survey of 25,000 by the Coalition for Better Ads. Google’s Chrome browser supports various extensions. But these extensions may no longer be necessary because Google is planning to build an ad blocker directly inside Chrome itself. The search engine giant is likely to announce this in the coming weeks. This move would fundamentally change how we consume media. This feature will not filter out all ads, only the ones which don’t comply with the list of standards set by the Coalition for Better Ads. It includes formats such as pop up’s, videos that play automatically or ads with countdown timers. These pop-up ads are just getting worse. And in light of this growing problem, Google has come up with a solution. This may turn out to be effective and may even provide users with a better experience. As of now, 26% of American users have an ad blocker installed on their desktop. It is one of the fastest growing phenomena in internet usage. They are typically browser add-ons which are available for Chrome, Firefox, Opera, Safari and Internet Explorer web browser. Pop-up ads are one of the least preferred ad experiences by mobile users, according to an extensive survey of 25,000 by the Coalition for Better Ads. Google’s Chrome browser supports various extensions. But these extensions may no longer be necessary because Google is planning to build an ad blocker directly inside Chrome itself. The search engine giant is likely to announce this in the coming weeks. This move would fundamentally change how we consume media. This feature will not filter out all ads, only the ones which don’t comply with the list of standards set by the Coalition for Better Ads. It includes formats such as pop up’s, videos that play automatically or ads with countdown timers. It includes formats such as pop up’s, videos that play automatically or ads with countdown timers. These pop-up ads are just getting worse. And in light of this growing problem, Google has come up with a solution. This may turn out to be effective and may even provide users with a better experience. As of now, 26% of American users have an ad blocker installed on their desktop. And along with Google, Microsoft is also working to bring a built-in ad blocker to its Windows 10 Default browser, Microsoft Edge. The infographic below summarizes all you want to know, check it out or read a lot more after the Infographic.     As for Google’s approach, they can go one of two ways: One option is to block all advertisements on a website, even if it includes only one offending ad. The other option is to only block the offending ad and leave the other ads visible. It’s not yet clear how Google will proceed, but it will be interesting to follow the company’s announcements in the coming months, given how significant AdWords revenue is to Google’s business. Why this feature? Everyone on our team is certainly questioning the reasons behind Google’s decision to create an ad blocker in the first place. One major reason must be to minimize the losses the company suffers as a result of ad blocking. If bad ads are filtered out, internet users will be more receptive to good ads and thus less inclined to block them. Another reason is browser competition. Most of the browsers like Opera and UC Browser have already accepted ad blocking and provide users with their own built-in version. Chrome does not do so on mobile, they have this feature only on the desktop. Users have come to expect this feature on mobile, which is also turning up the pressure on Google. Though not directly, Chrome does already block some ads. A feature enabled by default in the browser prevents the pop-ups from being shown unless the site is specifically whitelisted. This may come as good news for the millions of people who use AdBlock to keep their browsing experience safe from malware, intrusive advertising, and tracking. But this inbuilt ad browser for Chrome may not be a good announcement for the online publishers who are struggling to drive revenue on digital platforms. There have been mixed reactions to this news and a lot of people are raising antitrust questions. There is also a strong argument to this – some believe this is an anti-competitive move to suppress the competing ad firms. Chrome has nearly 60% share of the internet browser market and Google is a major player in the paid search and display industry. But why would Google do this when it makes billions in online ad revenue? While there are a lot of speculations, Google has a reasonable argument for this move. The Wall Street Journal reports that this has something to do with the growth of third-party ad blockers, which may be starting to make Google nervous. Starting their own ad blocker gives Google greater control over the situation. This is likely the strongest motivation for developing the Chrome ad blocker. Also, by deterring users from installing third-party blockers, Google will be able to ensure that at least certain ads are reaching more consumers. It takes some of the control away from consumers and gives it back to Google, which generated more than $60 billion in revenue from online advertising in 2016. What publishers should be doing to prepare: This is the best time to assess your ad environment and understand how this impacts your ad blocking rates. Think beyond a potential Chrome bad ad filter and ad blocking in general. The publishers need to navigate the ad blocking era by growing visitor relationships beyond monetizing eyeballs. Unfortunately, the rumor isn’t confirmed yet, and Google could still decide “not to move ahead with the plan”, according to “people familiar with the company’s plans.” Google passed along a statement: “We do not comment on rumor or speculation. We’ve been working closely with the Coalition for Better Ads and industry trades to explore a multitude of ways Google and other members of the Coalition could support the Better Ads Standards.” So we’ll have to wait until the company officially announces this new feature. Why does Google want to Build Its Own Ad Blocker? The Wall Street Journal recently reported that Google plans to build its own ad blocker for Chrome, but why would Google decide to build its own ad blocker, since the company itself is an advertising company? Not surprisingly, Google won’t be blocking its own ads since those ads comply with the standards specified by the Coalition for Better Ads (CBA). According to the CBA, problematic ads for mobile users include pop-ups ads, prestitial ads, flashing animated ads, autoplay video ads, etc. For the desktop users, they include pop-up ads, autoplay video ads, prestitial ads (with countdowns), large sticky ads and more. The use of Ad Blockers has increased rapidly over the years and it presents a challenge to publishers and content creators who make money from advertisements. People won’t have to opt-in to Google’s Ad Blocker since it is a browser and therefore it will turn on by default. As a leader in digital advertising, Google’s plan to create its own ad blocker will help the company further strengthen its influence across the web. Google has many reasons and motivations to create its own ad blocker, particularly given the growing use of third-party ad blockers. The stats and information gathered in this infographic demonstrate that Google is right to take action because ultimately, ad blockers aren’t going anywhere anytime soon. So if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em! Have a look and let us know your thoughts in the comments.  #Advertising #CustomerBehavior #Google #MarketingChallenges #MobileMarketing Read the full article

[punkscowardschampions]

Joe & Ronnie

Joe: how much you got on you rn Ronnie: enough for me Ronnie: you aint piggybacking Joe: enough for me then Joe: not suggesting you send it first class Joe: 'less you know how to do that Ronnie: I do but in what world mckenna Joe: however much you reckon you'd need to do it Joe: i'll double it Ronnie: use that ingenuity for your own score Joe: yeah whatever Joe: all chat Ronnie: like ive got anything to prove to you Ronnie: least of all how well i can be your bitch when you holler at me Ronnie: cry is more accurate Joe: fuck sake Joe: forget about it Joe: it's a stupid idea Joe: you gonna give me a better one Ronnie: not one for the scrapbook was it cunt Ronnie: dry your eyes & do your own running Ronnie: you need me to hold your hand everytime now Ronnie: big enough to take it go find it Joe: ha ha Joe: like I'm running anywhere Ronnie: this where we play doctor yeah Ronnie: you tell me how bad it hurts & I make it better for you Joe: exactly Joe: now we're on the same page Ronnie: nah you think you can tear out some pages & spit ball em at me to get my attention but why should I give a shit bout these playground games boy just 'cause you heading back home to your mammy Ronnie: im sound Ronnie: dont care how loud you're crying she's the one who's gotta show up for that Joe: i don't want yor attention Joe: i want some heroin Ronnie: maybe she's still got old school connections Ronnie: find her little black book son Joe: maybe Joe: one of you could be useful like Ronnie: wounded & bleeding Ronnie: shit junkie you are house full of people to shake up & shit to steal but you coming to me Joe: just looking for that big sisterly advice Joe: obviously Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: you sound like the littlest one what is he 4 like Joe: feel it Ronnie: trying to make my heart bleed now yeah Ronnie: grow a fucking pair before it really hurts Joe: if you wanted to scare me you shouldn't have given me the gear Joe: realistically too late anyway but who wants to hear or think about my idyllic childhood yeah Ronnie: if you couldnt hack it you shouldve cried off then Ronnie: save the tears now Joe: and i thought i was the only one with obsessive thought spirals Joe: when i get some i'll remember to feel good about how much you miss me Ronnie: like youre special baby Ronnie: please Ronnie: weve all got mad minds hows that not clicked in yours Ronnie: how many kids shes squeezed out & you reckon were the only self medicating Ronnie: hit up another sibling to fix you Joe: am though Joe: she's always told me Joe: ⭐ boy Ronnie: talk her up with that foreplay Ronnie: be good for £££s Joe: no tah Joe: not my type Joe: and it's only ever worked on you Joe: but you've given me another idea so cheers Ronnie: i dunno whats funnier that youre trying to tell me you dont wanna slip your mum one or you reckon you know what works on me Joe: lemme know when you work it out Joe: 👍 Ronnie: let me know when youve stopped playing happy families Joe: you reckon i wanna be here Ronnie: didnt see no fingernail marks on my floor or walls Ronnie: still reckon you were dragged though yeah Joe: check your thighs Joe: ain't all perks being the favourite 💔 Ronnie: [sends him pics cos that bitch haha] Ronnie: grow a pair whipping boy Ronnie: before she says jump youre on the ledge Ronnie: its pathetic mckenna Joe: see Joe: ain't been that long Joe: only feels it, babe Ronnie: you'll need all that sweet talk for the local dope dealer Ronnie: but if you wanna think of me when you're turning tricks for them it'll go easier Joe: lovely as that'd be Joe: not in progressive london now Joe: gonna have to pay like the rest, worst luck Ronnie: go beg for your pocket money then kidda Ronnie: before she picks a new fave Ronnie: younger & prettier like Joe: nah Joe: we want her to Joe: remember Joe: then me and more importantly my student loans can come back Ronnie: bullshit if you wanted her to you wouldn't have gone Ronnie: you love it Joe: can't just go way uni and never come back Joe: send out a search party Ronnie: use your ⭐ as a beacon cant they Joe: let's hope not Joe: i come here Joe: keeps 'em away rest of the time Joe: yeah Ronnie: if you want em to fuck off commit to it Ronnie: stop being such a pussy Joe: ain't that easy Ronnie: find a ditch to lie down in Ronnie: it ain't hard Ronnie: youre a junkie motherfuckers don't support that Joe: far as they know Joe: i ain't Joe: let 'em catch up Ronnie: do it yourself if you wanna slam the door Joe: see how this goes Joe: not really thinking about them right now Joe: you know Ronnie: youre on one about that lot constantly Joe: just on one constantly full stop Joe: why else would i need the shit Ronnie: dont need to go that hard playing doctor baby Joe: 💘 Joe: you always know just what to say Ronnie: not used to you talking Joe: i know i know Joe: in an ideal world neither of us would be here Ronnie: like not born yeah Ronnie: but she cant keep her legs closed Joe: such a dreamer, you Ronnie: not the one who cant get high without their hand held Joe: n'awh Joe: that's the dream Joe: so romantic too Ronnie: yeah im living it loads of gear close & you far as Ronnie: greedy prick Joe: miss you too baby Joe: in a bit tho, gotta go pick up Ronnie: fuck off soft lad Ronnie: you miss me spoon feeding you Ronnie: you cant talk to me with a dealers cock in your mouth I know Ronnie: multitasking hard enough pretending not to be junkie scum yeah Joe: sure the whole mummy kink ain't your thing Joe: i'll try and get involved but kinda a mood killer Joe: which is kinda rude, know you don't want me to score Ronnie: thats all yours but I'll try anything once Ronnie: 'cause a whinging dope sick baby is really a turn on for me like Ronnie: just gotta keep that going Joe: no judgment here Joe: gotta do what you gotta do Ronnie: you gotta Ronnie: im sound Joe: and i'm happy for you Ronnie: lie to them don't lie to me Joe: alright Joe: will be a bit when I get mine but still Joe: you don't have to be here so Ronnie: you dont Ronnie: grow up & cut the fucking apron strings Joe: you've stopped being helpful for the day? Joe: right then Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: not flying over to fuck you cos your ma aint in the mood & thats as helpful as it gets Joe: why not Ronnie: youve got another sister Ronnie: see if shes into it Joe: but you're so special yeah Ronnie: but shes a good grooming age Joe: leave it out Ronnie: or what Joe: or what Ronnie: asked you first joseph Joe: alright veronica Ronnie: alright weak cunt Joe: probably Ronnie: pick up before you make me sick Ronnie: jesus Joe: waiting on the man Joe: as per Ronnie: if id known rattling had made you shit out your whole spine id have sucked his dick for you & sped things along Joe: so sweet Joe: one of the many things I like about you Ronnie: list just gets longer the longer youre away yeah Ronnie: dont come back & maybe you'll fall in love Joe: i know you want that less than you want me back Joe: don't lie Ronnie: you care what I want now Ronnie: 💘 Joe: only when it benefits me too, darling Joe: junkie scum 101 Joe: was on my timetable like Ronnie: theyve really done a number on you if youre on your knees for my truth Joe: who Joe: mummy dearest or my school Ronnie: take your pick Joe: ain't tryna hide it Joe: just doing my bit to be the whiny baby you want rn Ronnie: cheers then Ronnie: nailed that Ronnie: tell your ma i finally get how she feels 'cause its too late to get you scraped out Joe: 😂 Joe: on it Joe: assuming i ain't 'bout to get kneecapped Joe: or worse Joe: stood up 💔 Ronnie: i'll cross my fingers for raped & robbed Ronnie: standard Joe: you know i ain't gonna have that much of a good time without you 💘 Ronnie: stop trying to make me say I hate you so you can rub one out Ronnie: i dont do sexting Joe: worth a shot Joe: just killing time here Joe: trying not to puke Ronnie: hot Joe: mhmm Joe: like that attempt at enthusiasm Ronnie: you really know how to make a girl wet what can I say Ronnie: gotta romance my dealer out of want instead of need now Joe: thought I'd return the favour Joe: just how I roll Ronnie: course you do golden boy Joe: you ain't that mad about it Joe: i know Ronnie: i aint as fucking thick as you so again course Joe: true Joe: [time for drew to show and not deliver] Ronnie: made up about all these compliments Ronnie: who knew you could be this much on my tits from this distance Joe: just that good Joe: obviously Ronnie: you aint shit Ronnie: don't lie Joe: whatever Joe: can't touch me now Ronnie: only your ma is turned on at the sight of you Ronnie: but she will Joe: alright Joe: cba rn Ronnie: how are you still crying Ronnie: did he not show Joe: he did Joe: but he was about 12 and had no gear Joe: got enough tranqs to knock out an elephant but still Ronnie: when i told you to hit up your siblings i meant the freckled one not one of the toddlers Joe: yeah right Joe: like he knows a great smack dealer, even if we did talk Ronnie: hes a coke head Ronnie: give him 5 Joe: nah Joe: opposite direction Joe: only way is up Ronnie: whatever just get on a plane Joe: yeah Joe: i'm gonna Joe: fuck this Ronnie: ill be waiting with shit that aint a fucking joke Ronnie: you can owe me Joe: yeah? Joe: good Ronnie: don't talk me out of it Ronnie: christ you're annoying Joe: 🤐 Ronnie: only want you back on your feet so I can kick em out from under you myself Joe: hot Ronnie: like you said, it ain't been that long Ronnie: you know I am Joe: yeah Joe: where was this distraction when I really really needed it tho Ronnie: baby when have I ever been good for you Ronnie: selfish to my core Ronnie: we're here for me Joe: works for me Ronnie: just get to the airport & stop fannying about Joe: I've already taken 'em so hold on Joe: no packing now never mind going through customs Ronnie: fuck's sake Joe: i had to Ronnie: when then Joe: still today Joe: just later Ronnie: fuck you Ronnie: call me Ronnie: maybe i'll answer if it ain't too late Joe: can i call you now too Joe: i gotta stay awake Ronnie: I'm good but no guarantees I'm that good Joe: they ain't kicked in that good yet either Joe: just keep my eyes on the road yeah Ronnie: how much did you pay for baby aspirin mckenna Joe: was cheap as fuck at least Joe: just a kid Joe: barely broke a 50 for all of these so Joe: [photo] Ronnie: not as green as you feel yeah Joe: want me to bring some back Ronnie: too late to rob the boy now Ronnie: & you'll take em yourself before you see me I know you Joe: yeah Joe: i will Joe: but had good intentions, babe Ronnie: take em to church Ronnie: what use is that shit to me Ronnie: gimme bad ideas or don't come around Joe: got plenty of those come on Ronnie: like what Ronnie: come on Joe: what Joe: tryna focus here Ronnie: you wanna stay awake Ronnie: play the game Joe: alright Joe: yeah Joe: you gonna come back to mine Joe: flatmate's gone home Ronnie: are you gonna make it worth it if she's not there to kick in the teeth Joe: won't need to miss her once I'm back Ronnie: fucked her yet? Ronnie: we could do it together Ronnie: I dont normally slip one to virgins but I already made the exception for you Joe: no and funny Joe: keep me as the only exception Joe: how else will i feel special Ronnie: keep hitting up preteen dealers that'll help Joe: he was pretty Ronnie: if im ever in the area like Joe: i wish Ronnie: you & your ma both Ronnie: my turn to feel special Joe: weird ain't it Ronnie: for me Ronnie: you love it Joe: nah Ronnie: not a question Ronnie: you do Joe: don't Ronnie: liar Joe: maybe from you Joe: I'll allow it Ronnie: those pills better be kicking in Ronnie: if youre chatting this much shit sober you can stay in ireland Joe: 😂 Joe: they are Ronnie: book a flight Ronnie: i ain't your ma im not doing it Joe: lemme get home, like Joe: be more obvious you're tryna kill me Ronnie: what im trying to do Ronnie: you gonna call that your home now Joe: you know what i mean Ronnie: yeah Ronnie: i know youre full of shit, mckenna Joe: nah Joe: just bars Joe: make it up to you Ronnie: bullshit Ronnie: x it as many times as fits Joe: k Joe: prove it when i see you Ronnie: you reckon Joe: not a question Ronnie: nah just bold claims for someone who still fucks like a virgin & has to check in with his ma Ronnie: can you without her permission Joe: get the slip signed if you're so worried Joe: chill out Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: couple of chewable vitamins & you're chill yeah Joe: you said you got loads Ronnie: I said enough Ronnie: & that was before babysitting you Ronnie: you make me need to spike every vein Joe: need Joe: want Joe: same diff we both know it Ronnie: not trying to make it matter baby Ronnie: put any words in my mouth you want Ronnie: or need Joe: here Joe: wish me luck on telling 'em i'm off Joe: or don't Ronnie: i'll do it for you Ronnie: point me at the relevant mckennas Joe: even stoned Joe: know that ain't a good idea Ronnie: pussy Joe: love u 2 Ronnie: 💋 Joe: [suitable amount of hours for the shit to wear off to a manageable level, avoid the parents and get out on the sly] Joe: [airport photo] Joe: tada Ronnie: we reckoned you'd bottled it Joe: taken a poll like Ronnie: yeah know you like to feel special Joe: warms my cold dead 💘 Joe: honest Ronnie: walk your corpse to me then Joe: and she says she don't sext Ronnie: you wanna be the only exception so bad or what Joe: you know how bad i want it Ronnie: dont leave again & maybe I'll buy it Joe: being dopesick was almost a nice distraction from thinking about you Ronnie: that warms my 🖤 Joe: thought so Joe: nothing does it quite like me being near-death yeah Ronnie: i do like you pathetic Ronnie: but don't think that any of it comes close to me yeah Joe: you saying you're better than heroin Ronnie: im saying you think you were hurting earlier Ronnie: ill show you pain Ronnie: all you have to do is fuck off again Joe: i won't Joe: i need to be there Joe: with you Ronnie: leave me & I will fucking break you Ronnie: i mean it Joe: i know Joe: i'm not gonna Ronnie: how did you get out Joe: parents weren't in but i said a uni friend was in a car accident and they couldn't get hold of his parents Joe: going hell anyway Joe: and someone on my course was hit by a car so if any of them are that concerned to go snooping Ronnie: thats beautiful Ronnie: you're not as much of a useless waster as youve sounded for most of the day like Joe: steady Joe: was almost not an insult Ronnie: who isn't turned on by a good lie Joe: only when I lie to you Joe: got it Ronnie: don't you fucking dare lie to me Joe: couldn't if i wanted to Ronnie: think about what kind of welcome back you want Ronnie: 'cause I can be nice or not nice Ronnie: its on you & what you say to me Joe: baby Joe: already told you I basically missed you more than heroin, how nice can one boy be Ronnie: you wont be saying that when I hand the gear over Joe: yeah i will Joe: been on you longer Ronnie: its fucking good though Joe: yeah Joe: ain't gonna say otherwise Ronnie: paid more & got better so you won't wanna leave Ronnie: dont have to rely on pretty preteens around here Joe: you know i didn't wanna leave in the first place Ronnie: i know you keep saying it like it makes a difference Joe: tell me what will and i'll do it Ronnie: i'll burn your passport that will Joe: burn my passport Joe: that's what you want? Ronnie: what do you have to go running to them for Ronnie: that's what I wanna know Ronnie: what the fuck is there for you Ronnie: cant even get a fix Joe: nothing, never has been Joe: it's obligation though Joe: you get it, i know you've done some shit just 'cos charlie wants to Joe: or 'cos bronson need it Ronnie: that's different Joe: why Ronnie: I ain't going round bullshitting how much i hate 'em on the one breath & in the other dropping everything for the pair of 'em Ronnie: ride or die is that Joe: okay so it is different Joe: it's more complicated Ronnie: fuck complicated its black & white Joe: nah like Joe: whatever i reckon about them Joe: i still owe 'em Joe: for now Joe: debts to pay like Ronnie: how ain't it been paid Ronnie: they ain't done you right since you were a kid Ronnie: if ever Ronnie: a roof & food that's easily totalled Joe: i dunno Joe: shit ton of interest Joe: learnt from the best debt collectors in liverpool, like Ronnie: write it off Ronnie: is when youre dead Joe: tell 'em that's my payment plan Ronnie: talking it out is your first mistake Ronnie: when the fuck has that worked on anyone who comes to collect Ronnie: dont even buy you time just makes you look a doss cunt more than you are Joe: maybe i can convince my da but you know she's biased Joe: all i have to do is get uni done and they can tick it off as a success Ronnie: i dont know jack about her Ronnie: how i want it Ronnie: if i aint read it off a file as a kid i don't need to hear it Joe: yeah Joe: but i ain't telling you i'm golden boy 'cos it seems cool am i Joe: whatever i'm gone now Ronnie: you're telling me 'cause you wanna trade wounds since I won't have your stories off you Ronnie: burn it into your arm deeper & maybe I'll pay attention Joe: you know it ain't about you, babe Joe: anyway, if we were still being nice I'd tell you none of the usual shit works to get you outta my head so thanks for that one Ronnie: ive been saying all day it's about her & I ain't competing with your fucking ma alright Ronnie: she smothered you poor baby Ronnie: you wanna try neglect its real easy Ronnie: feels better too Joe: you're the one who keeps bringing her up, yeah Joe: you want me to be that cunt Joe: easy Joe: I bet it was better, lucky you Ronnie: youre the one who ran home to have her tuck you in again Ronnie: youre that cunt Ronnie: mama's boy Joe: fuck's sake Joe: yeah alright Ronnie: you're the cunt who has the nerve to come crying to me when your mommy would shoot you up if you asked her to Joe: you reckon Joe: considering her dad was and she don't even hate yours as much i'll go with a no on that one Joe: plenty of sad stories I've heard and you ain't need to Ronnie: I reckon golden boy Ronnie: loves you as much as I love gear yeah Ronnie: & not trying to throw another baby away so you're welcome for the free pass Joe: cheers Joe: feels great Ronnie: you gonna cry again mckenna Joe: if i do i'll send you photos, don't worry Ronnie: 💘 Ronnie: send me some either way Joe: you're a headfuck you know Ronnie: yeah Ronnie: dealer said it last time I fucked him Joe: you want fresh line Joe: 👌 Ronnie: give it to me then Joe: give me the flight to think of something you ain't heard before Ronnie: it ain't long enough Joe: fair there's plenty of shit i can say that you ain't heard for real before Joe: but it'd be a copout so i'll keep trying Ronnie: like what Joe: how many of your brothers you fucked lik4 Ronnie: don't reckon freckles is interested Ronnie: leaves me the gay & the kid Ronnie: what about your sister that'd be hot like Joe: they're all kids, just so you know Ronnie: no they ain't Ronnie: i know you lost your virginity to me but don't reckon they're waiting Joe: you wish Joe: hopefully just on the first count Ronnie: you're a sick boy Ronnie: 💋🖕 Joe: you too baby Joe: 💘 Ronnie: thats not some shit I ain't heard before Joe: just truth though Joe: no lying Ronnie: feels like one Ronnie: I'm good Joe: what you want me to say to that Ronnie: say what you wanna say Ronnie: again not your ma Joe: i'm good then Ronnie: truth or lie Joe: lie but not a big one Joe: true once i'm off this plane Ronnie: you out of sweeties or they're just that sugar free Joe: i'm trying to time it just right Joe: then i can actually just a decent amount and not be in a coma for you Ronnie: alright fuck Ronnie: you win Ronnie: nobody's said that to me before Joe: i mean it Joe: i want you first Ronnie: don't say this shit when you're on the wrong side of a plane ride Ronnie: jesus mckenna Joe: gotta make sure you miss me too Ronnie: you're such a cunt Joe: yeah Joe: you still want me though Ronnie: shut the fuck up Joe: why Ronnie: what do you want me to say Joe: you don't have to say anything Joe: but I ain't gonna shut up about how I ain't been able to get you out of my head this whole time Ronnie: yeah you said im a headfuck Ronnie: more than your family & the gear Ronnie: I'll take it Joe: better though Joe: you know Joe: so I'll take it and all Ronnie: you're a headfuck Ronnie: what are you being nice to me for Joe: you said it could go one of two ways Joe: you want me to be mean Ronnie: I want you to be here Ronnie: but you ain't Joe: I'm coming Ronnie: & I'm waiting on you Ronnie: what the fuck Joe: I know Ronnie: I hate you Ronnie: I'm losing it, do you know that Joe: I'm sorry Ronnie: what am I gonna do with that Joe: I don't know Joe: what do you want me to do Ronnie: what can you do Ronnie: can't even score by yourself Ronnie: worse than a fucking kid Joe: was desperate Joe: and it was your idea Ronnie: thats how it is every time Ronnie: you don't have any fucking idea 'cause I'm here cupping your balls & wiping your arse for you Joe: you've been giving me an easy ride of it yeah Joe: alright Ronnie: youre gonna try & call bullshit on that yeah Joe: nah i just had no idea you were being so generous Joe: would've got you a keychain at least Ronnie: fuck you Joe: you too Ronnie: get one with sharp edges we can make a blood oath or some shit Ronnie: maybe after you'll grow the hell up Joe: sure Joe: it's my speciality yeah Ronnie: cutting's more mine but you can have it Ronnie: same old shit gets boring yeah Joe: we can share Joe: she'd be proud Ronnie: my aspiration in life Ronnie: cheers Joe: obvs mine too Ronnie: you brought her up then not me Joe: reckon you owed me that one so Joe: even Ronnie: 💋🖕 Joe: you're cute Ronnie: say that again & you'll be swallowing teeth Joe: don't worry, that was hot Joe: you won it back Ronnie: go to hell mckenna Joe: you wanna be with me forever Joe: 💘 Ronnie: just reckoning you'll get there quicker than you will this fucking airport Joe: just be glad I didn't try to get back in at rush hour Ronnie: be glad im still waiting Joe: ain't gonna waste words on it Joe: show you Ronnie: 💘

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali

Carly: last nite was good of you Carly: saying thanks cuz i read my text from last nite & it was Carly: I cudnt read it k thats facts Ali: nah, don't mention it, no bitch left behind Ali: plus, I know the cunt doing the ditching, been there, like Ali: was trying to translate but yeah, you were pretty fucked 😂 Ali: how you feeling this am? 💚 Carly: yea? hes not that bad Carly: im a slag like he said tbh Carly: feeling like i had a decent nite all things considered Carly: you? Ali: Gurl, yes he is and no you ain't! Ali: Probably Ali: Who cares if you are, he is, and the rest Ali: I dated him for a bit, so there's no shady, tryna steal your man on the sly going on, don't worry Ali: much the same, my head feels like someone took my eyes out and shoved 'em up my arse, you know? Ali: standard sunday vibes Carly: aw you're sweet but it's no diss on me Carly: like ive cheated on him a few times Carly: but he does it too you're right w that Carly: hes a good fuck when he's not too wasted tho which you kno if you got it too Carly: you're single now tho? Carly: can have him back if you want Ali: Fair play Ali: why not call it open and call it a day? Ali: Probs 'cos he likes fighting as much as he likes fucking Ali: Meh, yeah, was passable, gotta have some reason to keep him around, like Ali: Nah, going out with the girl that drove us back Ali: Remember? Dark hair, angry Carly: yea Carly: you know Carly: shit my bad Carly: she was scary is what i've got in my head Carly: idk my head is sketch cant trust it Ali: That's a fair assessment, I reckon Ali: She wouldn't hate it either so you good 😉 Carly: pretty tho Carly: call it a trade up Ali: Yeah, she's cute Ali: you need any more of the night filling in lemme know, I'll do my best Ali: it was pretty standard though, nothing too wild Carly: no faking it w her cuz shes too drunk Carly: designated driver be like Carly: last i see i was getting with his friend lowkey and he went off about it im blank from then Ali: its a fucking gay crime to ever fake it, no matter what Ali: I can get behind that one tho, not got the time or energy tbh Ali: yeah i think him and his friend then got in a scrap and then they left Ali: bros before hoes mentality hardcore, like idk, have fun jerking each other off then, if that's ur vibe boys Carly: k that sounds legit from what i caught on his socials Carly: didnt upload the circle jerk bless Carly: gay crimes must of been committed Ali: sad face Ali: coulda spat on his back Ali: protip Carly: ill let him know when he texts me later Carly: how did you kno where i live? state of me Carly: sorry to drag you this way Ali: plottwist, i'm a massive stalker with bad intentions Ali: I truly don't know, but I'll tell Lene she should be a cabbie 'cos she managed and I don't think we got any puke in her car Carly: k big lesbian crush on me yea Carly: ioher lots Carly: stealing her girl and wrecking her car in one Ali: Naturally, you cute Ali: I'll give you her number if you like, or just pass along the thanks and soz Carly: awh you're cuter Carly: probs still drunk tho Carly: giving me those kind words Carly: you handle the now ex if you love me Ali: Hahaha, he'd LOVE that Ali: ghosts of gf past Ali: Let me and I'll love you forever Carly: go for it Ali: let's see if I've still got his number Ali: this contact list is a minefield of mistakes but the real embarrassment would be getting them muddled up, fo'shame! Carly: i can give it Carly: used it more recently than you Carly: up there at my top Ali: won't be tellin' him that Ali: don't need the ego boost Ali: but tah Carly: makes it more fun to fuck him over if you praise him first Carly: but maybe thats me Ali: like a shit sandwich Ali: I get it Carly: hungry for anything but that rn Carly: [Sends the number tho] Ali: wanna come for brunch Ali: now you are newly gay Ali: that's what they do, fucking sex in the city up in dis bitch Carly: yea? weird Carly: not what i thought Carly: awh first date tho Ali: forreal, even the butch ones, don't let 'em fool you, its all fancy fucking eggs and screwdrivers by 11am Ali: you call 'em mimosas tho, gotta pretend you're being classy Carly: wtf is a screwdriver Ali: Babe! Ali: Vodka and orange juice Carly: i call it that Carly: gays and their labels Ali: save it for the rant sesh honey Ali: love you talking about how men ain't shit as well Carly: thats the ones i fuck Carly: cant be bringing no poshos to a caravan Ali: Posh boys are only good for the money anyway, I'm sure Ali: not finding any in 24 like regardless Carly: not gonna find out if they do drive by now im a lesbian wife Carly: sorry lads Ali: they had their chance Ali: unlucky boys Carly: should prob tell me your name again if im taking it Ali: Ruins the mystery a bit but alright Ali: Its Ali Ali: Ali McKenna if we're being formal Carly: k you've got the hot brothers Carly: makes sense Ali: 🤔 Ali: I think you're thinking of someone else, babe Carly: not trying to have our first fight but you coulda told me before we got hitched, bitch Carly: you're still hot tho don't be sad Ali: so you could run off with one of my brothers? i think not Ali: unless you meant Tommy 'cos he's very single but that's unlikely because he's never here Ali: stuck with me for now, hoe 😘 Carly: a slag like me could do worse Carly: has Ali: bitch, same Ali: we can compare notes, see how many regrets we got in common Carly: yea Carly: doing it Ali: Good, save it for brunch 'cos I'm coming forreal Ali: we don't have to deal with a gaggle of gossiping gays tho, bring you a maccies breakfast? Carly: k Carly: be fun Carly: you are from what i remember Ali: I like that Ali: No bullshit Ali: Imma start all interactions like be fun please or I'm out Ali: ✌ bringing the fun and the bacon babe Carly: you're not bringing your gf are you Ali: Nah, how awkward, meet the missus, honey Carly: like there's usually a lad in my trio sorry Carly: still learning this lesbian life Ali: oh, are you bi legit? Ali: she's way too jealous for threesomes, you're good Carly: nah i just know what lads want Ali: Oh gurl Ali: that's why Lene ain't coming Ali: the lecture you're avoiding Carly: idc Carly: youre my wife now bitch Ali: 💍💍 Ali: Productive morning, if I do say so myself Ali: and we're hanging, fuck with us Carly: good influence of you cuz i havent done fuck all this week Ali: Hard work being a bi icon, babe Ali: wait 'til I get you on the yoga hype Carly: wtf Carly: is that a joke Ali: nah, I've already done half an hour this morning Carly: bitch i had my fingers crossed you mistyped yogurt Carly: i love you but its a no Ali: 😂 lets be really into yogurt, not fancy stuff, like fucking froobs Carly: phallic Carly: slurping on my dick shaped yogurt Ali: exactly Ali: what do men love more than a representation of their genitals shoved in your mouth? nothing, is the answer, bar the real thing Ali: so seductive Carly: they don't like food in bed tho, but maybe thats my technique Carly: thinking you could use whatever Carly: k just gonna dump this curry out yea bear with Ali: spicy Ali: imagine the yeast infection you'd get from a fromage frais Carly: like sorry but if i can handle cum in my eye you can deal with some saag aloo boy Carly: googling those symptoms would be a laff tho Ali: ugh, now i want indian Carly: date 2, babe Ali: 😍 Ali: this is all moving so fast Ali: 'bout it Carly: thats all i kno about lesbians k Ali: Its so true Ali: Can confirm Carly: is your gf gonna be mad that im flirting with you Carly: cuz im scrappy but she's scary Ali: 😂 Ali: Probably but when I tell her you're straight she'll have to chill Ali: yeah, we're married BUT SHE'S STRAIGHT, BABE Carly: can't tell her how many girls ive fucked cuz i dont remember Carly: convenient Ali: Best keep that on the DL, yeah Ali: like your blatant gay feelings for me Carly: k Carly: been a secret before no big Ali: Awh babe, ain't nothing dirty about this Ali: I shall tell the world Carly: you're sweet Ali: Probably not if you still wanna be getting that D but you know, noblest intentions, like Carly: im over it Carly: go off Ali: when your pussy's the cure Ali: how can I be humble now? 😏 Carly: dont be Carly: proud slags who fucking love froobs Carly: its a mood Ali: that is a whole ass mood Ali: put it on a t-shirt, babe Carly: earn some bread for my table Ali: solid business plan Ali: we can't be the only ones Carly: independent women who don't need no dick Carly: anymore Ali: hell yeah! Ali: unless that dick wanna pay the bills, in which case we'll let 'em Ali: so we can get more froobs Carly: point Ali: oh no, someone put a pic of Molly Briggs vomming on Insta Ali: 1. gross 2. who hasn't been there, poor bitch Carly: sad Carly: hope she's alright Ali: I'd ask but don't really know her and her phone must already be blowing up Ali: plus she threw a netball right in my face once and I don't forget, bitch Ali: jk, I'll just report the pic 😂 Carly: they all call me a whore cba to keep track of which mollys or other bitches Ali: She is a bit of a bitch, ain't gonna sugarcoat it so probably Ali: not saying Karmas real but posted on that friggin' TallaghtSlags page so 🤷 Ali: grab a froob, darling Carly: her name makes me wanna party with her dad but thats as far as im fucking with that family Carly: or mum i dont know who picked it like Ali: Init, proper old skool ravers, obvs Ali: think I'm out of eccies, sadly Ali: last night depleted me Carly: Watch me call my son Bennie cos I got anxiety, baby Ali: Cute tho, whole medicine cabinet of babies Carly: why not im married now Ali: We'll get on that, date 3, like Carly: where you taking me? Ali: up the wheyyyyyyyyyy Ali: well, we had brunch, indian, obvs we're fat bitches Ali: get on that chinese buffet life Carly: you can get on your yoga mat tho Carly: im fucked Carly: letting myself go so soon my bad Ali: Please, you're perfect Ali: I'll have all the kids if you want Carly: blushing is what i am Carly: how many you want? Ali: how many people names are there for drugs? molly bennie mandy charlie umm Ali: and our preachy child, frank Carly: ha Carly: tina that's one Ali: Ooh, yes, a gay icon Carly: billy, bud our weak child, cosmic kelly who's gonna have to style that out Ali: oh kelly, I hope you have the personality to match or we've really fucked you over there, soz babe Carly: can't forget dimitri, lucy or mandy Carly: sweet sweet mary joy Ali: My fanny hurts just thinking about it Carly: christine and tina are obvs twins thats a relief Carly: how manys that? Ali: 13 Ali: Unlucky for some but my actual lucky number! Ali: Fated Carly: ha Carly: it's love and keeps being proven Ali: can't fight what's clearly so right Carly: true Ali: you want a milkshake Ali: i'm having one Carly: yea Carly: strawberry Ali: 'cos u so sweet 💚 Carly: awww Ali: I shall be right there, with brunch fit for a pair of proud slags Carly: k Carly: my parents arent here no need to break the news of wedded bliss Ali: Would be a weird first impression but I could rock it Ali: new fave in-law? I think so Carly: yea Carly: cant fight fate like Carly: been said Ali: forreal, catch me outside if you got something to say, lads Ali: alone time with the bae is always good tho Carly: you kno Carly: love you bitch Ali: love ya 😘

[punkscowardschampions]

Joe & Ronnie

Joe: Where you been lately? Joe: I just got some good shit in Joe: Come over Ronnie: Around Ronnie: You want coordinates? Ronnie: Who from? Joe: So mysterious Joe: just a clue Joe: been bored Joe: I went down Tavy Bridge Joe: Happy? Ronnie: devil's in the details you deviant Ronnie: a who not a where like Ronnie: reserving judgement til i get my taste Ronnie: trust you as far as I cba to throw you, mckenna Joe: could say the same of what i asked you but likewise, cba Joe: can hardly afford for it to be bad down that way, can they? but its that turkish bloke, never heard him called anything but boss Ronnie: got me interested Ronnie: how much you get Joe: more than you got by the sounds of Ronnie: touchy Ronnie: missed you too cunt Joe: right Joe: believe that when i see it baby Ronnie: you want a show, yeah? Ronnie: Must be bored Ronnie: Shoulda joined us. You'd have been about it I reckon. Was good Joe: I am, got a mountain of work to do and no will to do it Joe: Distractions needed Joe: I don't need an 'us' to have a good time Joe: but glad you had fun Ronnie: You know that's what I'm good for, baby Ronnie: take your medicine Ronnie: you'd have had a good time with her Ronnie: Tick another sister off the list like Ronnie: she's a better fuck than I reckoned she'd be Joe: No arguments here Joe: bring a lighter I've exhausted all of mine Joe: What are you talking about? Ronnie: Worn 'em out on your skin again you fuck Ronnie: State Ronnie: I'm talkin bout the princess bowing down to fitzy and me Ronnie: hell of a night Joe: Yeah don't know where I'm gonna shoot up now Joe: Oh well, I'll find a way Joe: Bullshit Joe: You're as sick in the head as me Ronnie: Get creative Ronnie: Plenty of veins Ronnie: And she's the sickest of the lot Ronnie: Believe it Joe: Your genius knows no bounds Joe: I don't Joe: Why would she do that? Ronnie: Fuck off Ronnie: Why not? Ronnie: Name a better fuck than yours truly Joe: 'Cos you and Charlie bragging is not a good enough reason to fuck up your life to find out if its unfounded Joe: Nah Ronnie: you want pics pervert Ronnie: it happened and she loved it Joe: No Joe: What the fuck Joe: If it did Joe: why would YOU do that? Ronnie: Why the fuck wouldn't I? Joe: because she's off-limits Joe: for fuck's sake Joe: what's wrong with you? Ronnie: not to me Ronnie: you're such a pussy Ronnie: cry it out Ronnie: how long you got? Joe: yes to you Joe: jesus christ Joe: you're not allowed to do that Joe: and you can forget coming over to mooch off my stash Joe: fuck! Ronnie: who the fuck says? she didn't Ronnie: I can do whatever the fuck I want Ronnie: get with the fucking program, mckenna Ronnie: you dont tell me shit Joe: She's a kid Joe: a fucked up one at that Joe: you wouldn't be happy if someone took advantage of Bronson like that Ronnie: what do you know bout it you doss cunt Ronnie: she ain't been a kid since her grandaddy raped her Ronnie: I've never taken advantage of anything but her student loans Ronnie: fuck you Joe: I was there, I fucking remember, and I've known her longer than you have Joe: You shouldn't have done it and you know it Joe: Dead wrong Joe: Charlie too Ronnie: You knew her Ronnie: you don't know shit now Ronnie: she came to us Ronnie: to get what she needed Joe: And you do? Joe: Don't front like you care about what she needs really Joe: You're full of shit Ronnie: I'm not trying to know her Ronnie: Or pretend to care Ronnie: I could give a fuck Ronnie: It ain't that deep Ronnie: It was one night Joe: For you Joe: My Brother is probably gonna fucking leave her Joe: You just wanted to help her fuck up her life Joe: 'cos you hate 'em all, right? Ronnie: Can't blame her if that's what she wanted Ronnie: well rid of that cunt] Ronnie: i did her a favor, yeah? Ronnie: unexpected bonus Joe: Shut up Joe: You know even less about him Ronnie: like your the expert Ronnie: so full of shit Ronnie: when did you last talk to him Ronnie: you hate him as much as i do Joe: Doesn't matter, I have reasons Joe: you don't get to have an opinion Ronnie: I got my own Ronnie: you don't get to tell me what i can and can't have, baby Joe: Well keep 'em to yourself like I do Joe: Yeah I do Joe: your share for starters Ronnie: make me Ronnie: like to see you try Ronnie: if i want it i'll come take it, you're not gonna stop me Joe: wanna bet Ronnie: yeah Ronnie: whatever the fuck you think you're gonna do you won't Ronnie: you don't have the ball like Joe: Try me Joe: but don't, 'cos I don't wanna see you Ronnie: Gonna grow a pair before I get there Ronnie: don't think so Joe: More likely than you growing the fuck up Ronnie: sick burn Ronnie: you've done too many on yourself, nothing left to hurt me Joe: Trust me, I'm holding back all the things I could say to you right now Joe: because that's you, not me Ronnie: do your worst, baby Ronnie: I love it Ronnie: You might like it if you let yourself Ronnie: go on Joe: Exactly why I won't Joe: I want you to suffer Ronnie: Good fucking luck Ronnie: You don't have the power Joe: Just the smack withdrawals like Joe: what a charmed life Ronnie: that'll be why you were begging me to shoot you up Ronnie: forgotten that first time already, yeah? Joe: didn't say I don't suffer Joe: I'm not that much of an idiot Joe: wear it on my sleeve like Joe: you do too but you shouting otherwise now 'cos you know you're wrong Ronnie: I don't need you Ronnie: I got gear before you Ronnie: will after Joe: Yeah but no one to give a shit Joe: sad washed up junkie nobody Ronnie: 'cause you do? Shut the fuck up, mckenna Ronnie: plenty of other warm bodies, Bea for one Joe: You know I do Joe: Bullshit all you want, can't change it Ronnie: Don't be pathetic Ronnie: I can match you damage for damage Ronnie: So what? Ronnie: You're not that good of a fuck even Joe: Yeah well if I could change it as well, I would Joe: didn't say otherwise Joe: You're the last person I'd wanna give a shit about for obvious reasons Ronnie: Kill the feeling Ronnie: bored and boring Ronnie: chatting this much shit like Joe: go fuck Charlie then Ronnie: gotta let him recover Ronnie: only fair Joe: considerate Joe: least you care about someone Ronnie: don't be jealous it doesn't suit ya Joe: not jealous Joe: impressed you can be vaguely human Joe: well done you Ronnie: you're well easily impressed Ronnie: never over it Joe: luckily for you Joe: don't take it for granted Ronnie: don't flatter yourself that anything I do is for you Joe: whatever you say baby Ronnie: that it? Ronnie: anything else you wanna come crying to me about like Joe: trust, that's not the kind of sympathy anyone is coming to you for Joe: don't flatter yourself Ronnie: says you but you're still trying it Ronnie: poor baby Joe: I came here to get fucked but you know Joe: you're worn out already so it's chill Ronnie: nah you're fucked up thinking you've been fucked over when it ain't about you Ronnie: I've got energy for days Joe: everything's always about you Joe: understood Joe: i'm not going to not stick up for Bea, say what you like about it and me Ronnie: calm your tits Ronnie: I wasn't putting her down Ronnie: no need to play the hero Joe: Yeah you were Joe: dragging her down Joe: why do you even let her hang around with you in the first place Ronnie: not taken her anywhere she didn't wanna go Ronnie: why the fuck do you care? Joe: because i care about her, obviously Joe: and the rest of my family Joe: that gets fucked over if she goes off the rails Joe: you don't like her so just leave her alone Joe: its not hard Ronnie: I'm begging nobody to come around Ronnie: take it up with her Ronnie: if you care that badly Joe: well don't let her Joe: jesus would that be such a difficult thing to do Ronnie: why do I want the grieve Ronnie: for you Ronnie: fuck off Ronnie: if she's got the cash or the gear she's coming in Joe: like its any grief for you to be a bitch Joe: i have the cash you don't need to tap her up Ronnie: Maybe she's more fun than you Ronnie: wouldn't be hard Joe: i don't wanna see you Joe: just take the money Joe: what have you got to lose here Ronnie: like i said, pleasure of the princess' company Joe: fuck you Joe: i'll make sure it never happens again myself if she's still out her fucking mind Ronnie: fill your boots Ronnie: love a project, don't ya, mckenna Joe: if you think i was trying to fix you Joe: then you're flattering yourself again Joe: big time Joe: we both know what this is Ronnie: had to find me Ronnie: try and fix it for your ma Ronnie: remind yourself how that worked out before you try that shit with bea Ronnie: you're a joke Joe: Might've started that way Joe: but I'm still here for me Ronnie: more fool you Joe: No arguments Joe: Oh gotta go Joe: Don't message me tonight k Joe: Laters Ronnie: where the fuck are you going? Ronnie: don't ignore me prick Ronnie: say something or I'm coming over Joe: Becky wants me to go out with her and her friends Joe: going to an exhibition so I can't have my phone buzzing that's all Ronnie: forget that slut Ronnie: she's even more boring than you Joe: I think the latter cancels out the former there then Joe: Some of her friends are alright, dunno, might be fun Ronnie: Shut the fuck up, mckenna Ronnie: we've got plans Joe: Who have I been having this conversation with since then? Joe: I told you no Ronnie: And I told you ya can't stop me Ronnie: stop whining fucking hell Ronnie: I'm on my way Joe: Neither me or the drugs will be here so don't bother Joe: you think I'm that dumb Ronnie: you think I won't kick your door in again Ronnie: try me Joe: Why bother? I'm telling you, nothing to find alright Joe: I'll slip you a key, save the door like Ronnie: you and some skank Joe: What, you get to be jealous now? Ronnie: I can be whatever the fuck I want Joe: You've been telling me all about your threesome Joe: all night Joe: you're crazy Ronnie: and you've been telling me you love me Ronnie: a soft lad like you fall for whoever you put your dick in Joe: You've got me wrong there Joe: I do love you but not them Joe: I have needs too though Ronnie: I told you I was on my way Ronnie: Wait for me and stop being a pussy Joe: its not just tonight though Joe: never know where we are Joe: you got other people, i can too Ronnie: Fuck off Ronnie: I'm about. You know where I am Ronnie: I can't be waiting around at yours with my legs open Joe: Yeah now you are Joe: but tomorrow you'll be telling me to fuck off Joe: Not asking you to but that's what it is Ronnie: So what you want me to wake you with a fucking kiss now like? Ronnie: I can't be running around holding you hand, you get that Joe: Obviously not Joe: So why are you mad? That's what I don't get Ronnie: 'Cause you're full of shit Ronnie: That is what you want Ronnie: And some other bitch is gonna give it to you Joe: So what if it was? You don't wanna do it so its none of your business is it Joe: but it isn't, a little normality every once and a while is nice but I'd never be able to keep it up so I'm not trying to Ronnie: You brought me here, you don't get to throw me away Joe: I'm not Joe: That's not what I'm doing Ronnie: You're leaving me out in the cold to go to some art gallery or whatever the fuck Ronnie: Lying prick Joe: Because you've fucked me off today Joe: that's all Joe: I piss you off all the time Ronnie: I hate you Joe: No you don't Ronnie: Fuck you Joe: See you later, yeah? Ronnie: Will you fuck Ronnie: I'd rather suck your brother's dick than be anywhere near you Joe: Why not get the full set Joe: Good luck with that one Ronnie: Why the fuck not Ronnie: Not getting what I need from you Joe: not tonight you're not Joe: you'll survive Ronnie: Like you give a shit either way Ronnie: Get the fuck out and take your limp dick to the gallery Joe: Don't put that on me Joe: I do care and I know you're fine Joe: You only have to ask and I give you what you need Ronnie: You're full of shit Ronnie: You know I'm not fine Ronnie: you're still going Joe: You aren't rattling is what I mean Joe: if you're serious I'll drop yours off on the way Joe: Will that make you happy? Ronnie: piss off, joe Joe: is that a yes or a no Joe: what do you want Ronnie: Go away Ronnie: if i see you i'll kick the shit out of you Joe: Okay if that's what you want Ronnie: I want you to stop micro managing me you fucking cunt Ronnie: like Ronnie's had her fix job done Joe: I don't mean it to sound like that Joe: I'm just trying to help Joe: to give you what you need Joe: I'm sorry, yeah? Ronnie: Your help is a kick in the teeth, mckenna Ronnie: If I'm not rattling you couldn't give a shit Ronnie: Fuck your pity parties Joe: That's bullshit Joe: I've got as much of a saviour's complex as I do a hero's alright Joe: You know why I'm still here, I've told you enough times Ronnie: But you aren't fucking here Ronnie: I haven't seen you for ages and you don't wanna see me Joe: I do but Joe: you fucked Bea, Ronnie Joe: then was a total bitch about it, call me what you wanna but yeah, it doesn't make me wanna rush over straight away to hear more Joe: still want you though so yeah, you got me, I'm beyond reproach fucked up Ronnie: What the fuck does that matter, it was fun, that's it Ronnie: I was off my head the 3 of us were Ronnie: I'm not gonna feel bad bout it but you're making it something it ain't Ronnie: It's only sex Joe: It matters because Joe: Never mind Joe: It doesn't matter to you let's leave it there Ronnie: Don't be a pussy Ronnie: Say what you wanna say Joe: Why? For you to take the piss? You're alright Ronnie: 'Cause I wanna know Ronnie: and you wanna tell me Joe: Alright, 'cos if her then why not Fraze or any of the others? Joe: I get that you don't like them and you wanna hurt them but I dunno Joe: Its my fault for thinking you wouldn't go there, 'cos maybe you gave just an inkling of a shit about me Joe: I don't want them involved in us, its meant to be just you and me, not them tainting it or us tainting them, yeah? Ronnie: Fuck's sake Ronnie: not everything I do is about them or you Ronnie: we were fucked up and we did what we did Ronnie: call me full of shit if you wanna believe I masterminded some kind of black sheep vengeance bullshit but it ain't Ronnie: if I was looking to fuck up your precious family I'd just tell them about us Ronnie: Bea used Charlie and me to get him to leave her 'cause she can't hack it anymore Ronnie: she's fucked up. You don't wanna hear it but she is Joe: Being fucked up still isn't an excuse though Ronnie: I'm not making one. I don't need to, I didn't do anything wrong Joe: Alright Joe: it still hurt regardless so Joe: I'll catch you later Ronnie: Don't go Joe: Ronnie don't Ronnie: don't fucking go Ronnie: I can take the pain away, yeah? Joe: I wish you could Joe: the smack barely touches it some days Ronnie: I'll get more Ronnie: the good shit Ronnie: Be there til it works Joe: I've got to try and get them to leave without me then Joe: got any good excuses? Ronnie: I'm dead Ronnie: You've gotta mourn for the next 40 years Joe: Not funny Joe: but might work Ronnie: Believable that you'd find me rotting in the gutter Ronnie: go with it Joe: Shut up Joe: not happening Joe: I'll go with the shits like a normal human Joe: off-putting enough Ronnie: has she seen trainspotting? Ronnie: arrange a viewing Joe: Surely she has Joe: Probably read it too, pretentious students after-all Ronnie: and you were gonna spend your tonight with these cunts over me Ronnie: priorities, mckenna Joe: you drove me to it woman Joe: i wasn't pretending it wasn't gonna be painful Ronnie: you love the pain, you twat Joe: Looks like it Ronnie: let me know when the coast's clear Ronnie: I'm only a couple of streets away like but in no mood to chat with your normie mates Joe: aww whaddya mean you don't wanna come and claim me and scare them off? Joe: rude but there ya have it Joe: i'm not the only one 'breaking hearts' tonight, Becky is devastated, like Ronnie: I'd love it Ronnie: But you've gotten pissy enough already Ronnie: Not worth you being a cry baby all night Ronnie: You've never broken a heart in your life, mckenna Ronnie: other than her own the fuck has she either Joe: I dunno, reckon it was true love with my high school gf, and where is she now Joe: also, i was a pretty cute kid, i'll have you know Ronnie: Shut the fuck up Ronnie: I'll find her and kick her teeth in too like Joe: Poor girl, she's definitely not invested enough to deserve that beatdown Joe: Its been 2 years, little late to the punch baby Ronnie: True love or uninvested, which is it you lying bastard Joe: I was joking, there's no way she's not over it by now like Joe: even if she was a little highkey Ronnie: Cover your arse now I'm about to deck ya Ronnie: yeah yeah Ronnie: They fucked off now? Joe: you can stalk her socials if it'll make you feel better Joe: probably engaged or got kids idk Joe: yeah, now putting their coats on Ronnie: I'm outside testing the lighter you wanted Ronnie: Be in when they ain't Joe: want me to come out and join you or we skipping right to main course Ronnie: go for it Ronnie: freezing like but not gonna care for long Joe: i'll bring my coat Ronnie: Pussy Joe: for you moron Joe: gentleman Ronnie: clearly a save Ronnie: I see ya Joe: i see you shivering like Joe: no need to thank me Ronnie: Unlucky, I had some ace ideas for how I was gonna Joe: Damn Joe: Can't catch a break Joe: You defs owe me for the gear still, yeah? Ronnie: Gentleman my arse Joe: You caught me Joe: but you gave me a lot in this conversation I've gotta prove wrong Joe: so its really your fault Ronnie: whatever you say, baby Joe: S'whatever shit YOU been saying Joe: but I'm ready Ronnie: I'll keep my mouth shut til you want it open like Joe: Yeah, you're no lady either Ronnie: thank christ Joe: Join you on that one Joe: Amen Ronnie: Join me out here Ronnie: Any slower you could say you're dead Joe: Feeding the cat Joe: not the only girl in my life Ronnie: Don't tell Charlie bout all the pussy jokes I coulda made and didn't Ronnie: not trying to piss anyone else off Joe: Secret's safe with me Joe: I'm sure he'll find another way to be dramatic Ronnie: you and him both Joe: Oi Joe: I'm not as bad as Charlie, you take that back Ronnie: no take backs Ronnie: who the fuck is though like Joe: aw, you love him really thought Ronnie: take that back Ronnie: soft lad Joe: can't Joe: i don't make the rules but you enforce them hard Joe: alright, if a guy comes and asks for a light, its me Joe: so be nice Ronnie: who the fuck is friendlier Joe: if you want me quicker you won't ask me to make that list Ronnie: fucking fine Ronnie: only 'cause I do want you now Ronnie: you're still wrong Joe: Coming