#cause it's not socially acceptable
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Not me having a breakdown past midnight because I have to go back to work Monday and I don't want to.
#misc#what if the concept of working didn't exist uh?#joke aside#i hear older people close to retirement saying they don't want to work anymore#and im like that in my early 30s lmao#and i can't publicly that i don't want to work#cause it's not socially acceptable#but it's the truth#i haven't done shit to find any other job#because in all honesty#i feel no desire towards any work whatsoever#i don't care about discovering x or y#it's all shit#anyway#this just hit me randomly right now#my brain reminded me of that#i mean every time it's hard#it's hard when it's after a break week where i did absolutely nothing whatsoever and come back with guilt#but it's hard after travelling too#starting to think travelling is just the more expensive adult version of escapism#like i don't want to kill myself anymore#but i like to absolutely forget i have a shitty life anyway for a few days#and i had a good time#(well not this week I'm just sick for the whole week)#but i am hitting the wall of reality#and the guilt will come too cause yeah i haven't cleaned my shit#and i absolutely don't want to come back to work#but i haven't done shit to put myself out of this situation#cause this requires working somewhere else#short story long story there's no possible escape road
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Happy Birthday!!
TYSM FOR ALL THE BIRTHDAY WISHES! YOU GUYS ARE TOO KIND 😭💜
#ask reply#IM ACTUALLY floored over how much love and support yall have shown me#I WOULD of been happy with one birthday wish but yall blew it out of the water 😭#I can’t possibly reply to all of you but know I’ve read each one!!#I can never gage how much I am apart of a community#especially seeing I’m not particularly a social person which always worries me#BUT GUESS those worries are squashed cause I feel very accepted in now 😭#TYSM to all of you again#I hope I can keep making art yall enjoy for many years to come! 💜💜#it’s the very least I can do for all your kind words and endless support 💗
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also remember that no form of resistance is ever acceptable to the colonizer. and that includes non-violent resistance (the great march of return) + non-violence is only successful against a force that has a conscience. but if your opponent had a conscience, he would not be oppressing you in the first place.
#its a bit weird how people who have been oppressed for decades are held to this moral standard that not even their oppressor is held to tbh#also yeah agreed w the person here like if i was a part of such a group being oppressed i would not just sit and take it#there's only so much pain and loss you can take#israelis want to cause so much destruction that it debilitates the palestinians but it ends up fuelling their desire to fight back even mor#i was just reading up on how initially the people who made up hamas focused on social services#and only became interested in developing a militant wing after israel's brutal occupation of south lebanon#and the plo's retreat#even before oct 7#hamas fighting back was never acceptable to Israel#even if they were only using rockets made of scrap metal. no form of resistance can ever be acceptable to the occupier.#free palestine#palestine#gaza#israel#israeli war crimes#death to israel#long live palestine#glory to the martyrs#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#long live the resistance
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It is amazing to me that the show has a character who:
Explicitly says “my father forced me to kill and I was good at it, but I hated it”;
Makes multiple efforts to walk away from a fight where his opponent is doing the absolute most to provoke him and, upon finally snapping, handily beats him;
Stabs a dude with a pair of scissors in self-defense and immediately looks horrified at himself; and
Can stomach all kinds of gross and scary shit unless it involves harm coming to his little brother, whom he obviously has a lot of baggage about protecting.
And a not-insignificant number of people are like “his neurosis is that he feels bad about not being a fighter or a badass.”
#jonathan byers#it also feels like a very…meta? insecurity to give him#people who watch tv shows with a lot of action care about characters being badass#in real life most people have other concerns#that’s kind of my problem with how Eddie is written#that’s the problem of a tv character who knows he’s a TV character#also I didn’t grow up as a boy so I didn’t have the same experience#but as a girl who was really far away from being a socially acceptable girl for most of my childhood#I don’t think a lot of people get how that experience can cause you not to value what the in-group values#because it’s not attainable and you’re not getting to experience the rewarding part#I remember a friend’s mom telling me some mean girl was just jealous because I was smart#and I thought ‘I don’t think she really cares about being smart. we don’t value the same things’
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I would honestly call the left's inability to accomodate people with morality-based OCD compulsions an accessibility issue at this point.
#coming under this: black and white morality thinking!#constant guilting about posting on social media showing your true values and personality!#shitting on people for their alarm about protest suicide! (with bonus 'how dare you insinuite mental illness was a factor!')#glorification of making yourself suffer mentally by viewing uncensored war imagery in 'solidarity' for those suffering in war!#unquestioning acceptance of all of the above as good and right!#promoting the idea that the individual self is expendable and that focusing on yourself (even to survive) is a reflection of your character#seriously this website cares so much about mental health until suddenly it doesn't- fuck the left so much for this i'm so triggered by this#not to be graphic but if i ever take my own life and claim it is for activism- this is not out of the realm of possibility#i DO NOT want anyone to justify my decision with it being activism and indirectly encourage others to do the same#i want people to instead look at the kind of rhetoric that causes people to choose this as a way out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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I was talking with some friends today about hats, and one of them said that in a human au gum gum would wear a bucket hat, so take some gum gum in a bucket hat doodles
#Cause its like a wizard hat#But more socially acceptable#Not to say gum gum wouldn’t wear a wizard hat anyway#I drew these while I was trying to come up with ideas for the start of kyborg week tomorrow#I think I’ll just end up drawing something basic#tftsd#tales from the stinky dragon#gum gum#my art
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why is it that i love socializing on my own terms and go out of my way to talk to strangers (when my paranoia isn't seriously acting up at least) and get excited when my friends message me or ask to arrange to hang out and love dressing in weird outfits that i personally think look nice even if everyone else finds them weird and judges me but the second i get invited to a party my brain goes full carrie white about it
#🐉#i guess its probably because being invited to a party means i owe it to the organizer and the person its for#not to make them feel uncomfortable or draw attention away from them by being weird and strange and myself#whereas in public people have the option to ignore me if they dont like my deal and my friends of course accept me and love me for who i am#but still. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#like i dont need social approval but i DO need to make sure i dont 'cause a scene' at someone elses special event#ALSO!!! i hate the concept of overdressing why the fuck is that a thing im gonna kill you just let me wear my little outfits
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Okay but also because I'm a pedantic bitch...in relation to that post I just reblogged explaining part of gay-on-gay bigotry...what if some people are just assholes who happen to be gay, or bi or trans? And they're all for oppression or just plain cruelty as long as it's aimed at other people? Like that's also something to consider.
I don't actually think, any longer, that "internalized self-hate projected outward and also suppressed envy for someone who's doing and being all the things you were convinced into not allowing yourself" is...all there is to this phenonemon. And I wish we'd stop fixating on that quite so much just because we want to be frankly, nicer than some of these people have ever deserved. It's always more satisfying on some level, to imagine your enemies as Tortured deep inside (whether it's because you feel a bit malicious or you just want to believe that there's a way to reach out and heal them with kindness.) than to admit that Sometimes They're Just a Shithead.
Now, do I think that complex can be a big part of it? Oh yeah. And of COURSE, different people have different motivations in different amounts and yadda yadda yadda. No group of people, ethnic, gender, political or otherwise is a Monolith. (For one thing, when it comes to these Pick-Me Gay/Trans pundits and Influencers, money and clout should never be left out as an explanation. Just saying.) But that's the point, isn't it? Any ONE explanation can't explain them all completely.
Tbh, I think we need to consider some people are just bullies who happened to be born not cis or straight. And even if they were bullied at one point for their identity, they learned absolutely nothing from the experience except Don't Be On the Social Reject Side. So they moved their thinking just enough that "woman who likes women" "man who likes men" "I just happened o want to be a woman instead, or a man instead despite how I was born" could be put in the Safe category and they fight for that. Everyone else though, is still fair game and even a fair target. Some people don't just want power to escape oppression and live their lives in peace, they WANT to BE the ones oppressing. Like, do we ACTUALLY understand that LGBT people are humans too and that that includes the bad side?
It tracks a lot better too, when you consider that a lot of people like the masc4masc gays are openly racist and fatphobic. "No fems" Yes but also "No fats. No Asians." Christ, I could think of countless examples of white thin (and sometimes but not necessary cis) queer people doing that sort of thing. I'm sure y'all can too. This idea of some poor lost soul Tormented by Self Hate and Envy of the Freedom of Others doesn't do shit to explain that. Like, even if the two things coexist and they can, it doesn't explain that part.
I honestly just think the uglier but more accurate truth is that lot of queer people aren't all Hashtag Gay or Trans Rights or aren't Liberal out of any sense of justice AT ALL but only self-interest. Being an activist because you're a member of an oppressed group is like, entirely normal and fine of course BUT it becomes real clear when someone's framework of ethics and politics is PURELY "I think me (and people I personally like and approve of) being oppressed is bad" and literally not one inch deeper.
You can tell because if it was deeper, why would they find it so easy to turn around to a fellow queer/trans person to jeer at and humiliate and throw them under the bus if they think they're a Deadweight to the group by being a Weirdo I Don't Want to Stand Next to, Eww...or if they just don't personally like them? Why have you clearly spent absolutely no time unpacking any of the prejudice and biases around gender sexuality (or GOD FORBID race) that society throws at you.. at least no more time than it takes to rationalize yourself out of the category of Should Be Destroyed and Oppressed?
We are not immune from this sort of terminally self-interested activism. I just feel like we'd get a lot further as a society, as a community, if sometimes our analysis of bullies and assholes didn't fixate on finding some deep pain and trauma inside them, to explain their actions in a way that makes them look more tortured and less malicious (even if we say, even mean, that it's not supposed to be an excuse). Sometimes people are just racist, or fatphobic. Sometimes lesbians or gay men or bi or trans people just want to be judgmental bullies too.
Sometimes the reality isn't Tragic Villain Backstory. Sometimes, its just a selfish, deeply pathetic person refusing to become any less, because it's easier not to; even if you had a unique chance to see how the other side lives, a chance your straight cis bully peers didn't get by virtue of their identities.
#(same mentality as women who think every abortion is evil besides theirs. Freedom for me not for thee#ppl act like that's so shocking I used to. But now I'm just like...well have we considered Selfishness?#these women only rationalized and unpacked enough to make an exception for themselves.#and then actively refused to learn a thing from the experience. They carried on being as misogynistic as ever#judging all other women and claiming pregnancy is an appropriate punishment for not doing Everything Right#(except when its me). you can tell by that. They just happen to be misogynists with self-interest#human beings have an AMAZING ability to do all kinds#of mental gymnastics to believe things that contradict each other#we're not rational creatures. Accept this now and many more things will make sense this is an order. ANYWAY)#plus imo this Self Loathing theory fails to explain that not every feminine woman or masculine man#hates their gender presentation? Like yeah a lot of the makeup and diet culture is awful but#there are always gonna be ppl who want to dress a certain way regardless of societal pressure#making it exponentially harder to detangle where your Genuine Wants end and that begins.#the downsides of being social animals. And I guess I just don't know who's served#by pretending that's not a thing. The older i get the more i think we need to be careful before#our honest attempts to explain why peoole fight for systems/things that cause them trouble turn into infantilization#it's very possible to turn condescending and infantilizing going all Oh People Don't Know What's Best For Them#They're All Brainwashed. Give oppressed people the agency to be assholes too#plus it just leaves these ppl the opportunity to go I Don't Hate Myself#lmao loser.' Whereas 'you're just an asshole who doesn't care about anyone but yourself getting hurt'#is while not something they might be swayed by or care about a lot harder to refute.#we can't always know what goes on in people's heads. Going by their actions is helpful tho
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Beginning to think that there are some parts of my history that are best kept in history.
#I talk very openly about most of it but I do realize that I am from SecCom#and that the project I was developed for was highly secret for a very good reason as we were deployed most often as shock troops#or for heavily extrajudicial purposes#Maybe it is for the best that I do not speak of my deployments. I never mean to make anyone uncomfortable#I do not wish to be obtrusive or to cause issues but without APMS I do not have a reliable way to judge what is socially acceptable#lancer rp#oc rp blog#lancer rpg#oc rp
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“omg I have stuff to do today I need to get up why am I so tired”
the leif i absentmindedly doodled past 11pm because I suddenly found the airbrush tool to be Very fun:
#not really tagging this as anything cause this isn’t art I put any effort into#I am just pissed off at myself lmao#spoilers in the upcoming tags#the majority of this post’s content is gonna be in the tags lmao#I watched a vid yesterday abt cordyceps. what a terrifying thing#iirc ants will actually carry away infected ants to protect the rest of them. isn’t that insane#ants are social bugs and I don’t think moths are (look I love bug fables but idk shit about bugs)#but it got me thinkin#ya think that if anyone else found out abt the whole leif cordyceps thing they might try to quarantine him or smthn?#his cordyceps couldn’t infect anyone else but moths so it’s not like the greater public is in danger#but idk if it would be seen as acceptable for him to hang out around muze and tod when he has a parasitic fungus that could kill them#eh who knows!! i am just spitballing.#my brain was just tossing around fic ideas. fics I will never write#like what if zasp knew. like when he was trying to save him from the scorpion attack he realized#‘oh shit there is a fungus in this guy’#like that wound was pretty deep right. he’d probably definitely see some cordyceps hanging out in there#even if he didn’t know exactly what it was#anyway idk what I’m talking about. I’m gonna shadow at the vet clinic in like. four hours#so I should probably get out of bed and stop thinking about parasitic fungi#but rambling abt bug fables while I sit in bed listening to pop music is so fun……
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Shut up about reading comprehension and media literacy, shut up about picky eaters, shut up about people who only watch cartoons or read fanfiction, shut up about poor hygiene and the frequency at which you should shower/brush your teeth in order to be treated like a person, shut up about people who can't order their own food at a restaurant, shut up about bad social skills, shut up about people who can't "read the room" and aren't able to get jokes/sarcasm that you think should be obvious, shut up about autistic people that literally have actually noticeable traits associated with autism that they don't/can't mask that you might consider annoying and a nuisance. Consider, that you, in fact, may have it better than other autistic people. And I'm also here to remind you that autism is a disability since I'm starting to believe a lot of you forgot or just don't consider it one for some reason
#saw a post in a similiar vein but it was unrebloggable and also i needed to make my own. arrggghhhh.#also the people that act like it is now socially acceptable to be autistic and we have it ''better'' than other disabled & neurodivergent#people only cause more people are aware of it lmaooo.....#''autism and other such destigmatized disorders-'' are you fucking serious. WHERE#WHERE do you live that autism is apparently that well accepted and respected. Literally where.#mine#actually autistic
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Women’s self-image is as negative as ever despite the “body positivity” wave of choice feminism. Why?
I think one of the biggest reasons as to why women’s beauty standards and self-image are worse than even is because you can preach about unfair beauty standards all you want and tell women not to make fun of another woman’s looks but you can’t take away the social status and praise that women who are “beautiful” get from society (both men and women). You give them clout and praise them. Something both “body positivity” and “body neutrality” feminists do btw despite all the talk about acceptance.
It’s like saying you don’t support the ethics behind a product and yet still consume and buy it. In this case “beauty” being a luxury achieved via consumerism where women become the products (objects) that other women admire and obsess over. There is a demand so there is a supply PERIOD.
Women might not directly pursue beauty (“I do it for myself”) for men but nonetheless it’s definitely ingrained as a sign of status and that’s enough to cause a negative self-image in women who don’t participate. Men might have been the original perpetrators of installing unrealistic beauty standards for women but the victims (women) have also turned into perpetrators who can’t let go of the misogynistic status symbol of having value from appearances because it’s considered “culture”.
#ic.text#this goes for many spaces and#why I low key have little faith that women will every be free form this hyper fixation on looks#so you support hairy women and healthy eating but look at the own you praise#even if you’re not shit talking may women and saying positive words#it doesn’t go unnoticed how certain women are still valued#men don’t have a these self esteem issues because they are largely INDIFFERENT towards even handsome men#and this is why this whole ‘body positivity”’ from libfems to ‘body neutrality’#from radfems is just fake and two sides of the same coin#as long as you have have a constant steam of praise and clout for women#then women WILL be hella self-aware and conscious about their looks#how can’t they when ‘oh women pretty’ is constantly throw on their faces#that’s why women self monitor and all your ‘ x feature is pretty’ or ‘ have a neutral opinion on X feature because we’re human’ will never#work when you turn around and praise ( so raise the status of and regard) conventionally attractive women who perform femininity#it’s the leading cause as to why women pursue beauty - for praise and status - so of course the incentive will always be there#and to me it makes a lot of sense because if tomorrow there arose a kind of culture within society where attractive men who#really groomed themselves where praised to high heavens#whether women finally having standards for men or men casually valuing super handsome men#( without putting any ‘ugly’ men down for their looks)#a lot of men would subconsciously pick up on the new valored social status and want to peruse it#but they don’t have that culture that surround them AT all ( unlike with wome) so you don’t see men#with the bajillion complexes that women have - men have no incentive#they hardly ever get reminded that handsome men are valuable#the way women are valued by BOTH men and women for their beauty#tldr: both body positity or body neutrality are ineffective if you still give status into women who DO fit the standard#women and girls aren’t blind and will absolutely go for whatever gets them praised when if it’s harmful because the feedback/acceptance/#praise/money etc is WORTH it
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having mommy issues be like I hate that you know me I hate that we’re related I hate that you birthed me I hate that you don’t know how to love me properly I hate that you can’t see how much you hurt me I hate that I’m expected to love you
#cy says stuff#I moved out when I was 17 for a reason#but I do still go back to visit when schools out sometimes and I regret it every single time#every time we talk I’m like damn is it time to call it quits because this is not it#I literally feel like I’m constantly on the brink of being disowned or kicked out of the house when I’m there#but it’s also for things like. bringing a single bottle of wine to a Christmas party that I did not even drink#or like. moving in with my partner of 4 years. because we are going to the 2nd most expensive city in Canada and girl I cannot pay the rent#or being upset when she reads my diary ?? or reads my credit card statements without permission and also just like behind my back??#like do you think I’m not going to find out when you bring up information you only would’ve known if you had read those things#I can put two and two together…#also I’m literally almost done my university degree. i am fully an adult. these should not be issues !#ahhhhh!!!#anyways I will speak to my therapist about this lol#also y’all my friends are always like oh I love my mom and it just seems to be a socially accepted thing that you should love your mom#but what if your mom sucks what then#I genuinely cannot relate to them I’m like literally what does that feel like#the first time I felt loved was when I was 15 lol there is 0 love in my family#anyways !#it’s okay I am out of it and I have been out of it#just#always on the brink of cutting her off forever lol#some ppl just never change as much as you want them to and that is tough to accept.#it is also harder because society is telling my that I need to stay loyal to my family cause they’re blood#but if this were anyone else I would’ve blocked them so long ago 😭
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it's so embarassing when people can tell you have anxiety and are generally reserved and awkward like fuuuuck you can tell i'm a prey animal and you move slowly towards me looking away and not making loud noises
#thoughts#i really appreciate it tho like they're trying to make me comfortable and i do NOT hold it against them at all. love u#i guess it embarasses me cause people infantalize me enough cause i have no social skills and also look like im 17#also hard to accept genuine kindness lool
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Friendly reminder that your friends aren’t obligated to contact you every single day.
If you see your friends out and about or active online and they haven’t jumped to contact you: you have no right to make them feel bad about it. They’re your friends not extensions of yourself, their lives don’t revolve solely around you.
And another friendly reminder: you don’t owe your friends constant contact! This applies both ways people!
#social courtesy#friendly reminder#just a little reminder#cause people seem to forget this#and it’s like huh???#sure if someone ignores you for months that’s problematic#but someone going even a week without contacting you (or only talking in small intervals) is fine#and shouldn’t be as hard to accept as some people seem to find it
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so many people on that post about wishing to be rich so i could be insane in peace like "omg literally me" yes my loves it is all of us. thats sort of the point
#the point was not I Want Money#the point was rich people have access to resources that make it a lot easier to accommodate their needs#regardless of whether those needs are considered socially acceptable#they only call it a disorder if it causes disorder in your life!! well guess what makes it a lot easier to maintain order#even at times when your functioning is impaired
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