#cause i dont want to kill myself yet i have to do the things

[manicali]

The weekend isn't enough I've literally been passing out on the bus.

[solar4seekstron]

Before and So Forth Chapter One: Megatronus

TransformersOne!Megatronus x Cybertronian!GN!reader (Bit of Starscream x reader- kinda)

Solars Indie Series

Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight

Introduction Indie Series

Content: 16+

Trigger warning: 16+???, Megatronus and Starscream want you, Sentinel eventually. Nonconsensual touching at first…I think that’s it 030

(This is going to be a long one. The story takes place before the events when Sentinel kills the primes and all th High Gaurd have to hide and plan to destroy sentinel. In this story because I enjoy tat sort of yandereish crap I wanted to make it x reader where everyone basically wants that reader cake lmfao. But not in an extreme way. There isn’t many females but I can add a few if so requested. I’m not sure about Solus Prime but I‘ll talk about that at the end. For now it’s mostly Megatronus, Starscream, Soundwave Shockwave, and Sentinel. I’d love to add more females I swear. My DM’s are a safe place if you wish to request any females. Or other males. I’ll do my best.

The plan is once it comes to the death of the Primes. (Weirdly excited to write how that’ll go) I’m going to give myself more work and write different path for the reader like if she doesn’t know what happened and Sentinel lies to them or the reader does know and hides with the high guard. Eventually with the sentinel timeline the reader ends up with Megatronus cause of course. It’s going to be a long one so please be patent….like with this chapter lol.

This chapter won’t have smut but it is spicy. Close to the end. If you don’t like don’t read this page and account is only for people who enjoy these to come to . Dont bully or harass anyone and leave.

Anyway my loves please enjoy and I shall release Chapter two next week. So every Tuesday :D)

Being a part of the High Guard who fought alongside and for the Primes.

Have always been something you felt pride but at the same time almost guilty for. As time in the years went by you began to wonder if you’re even a true part since there were so many others above and even better than you.

Such as Starscream, Shockwave, and Soundwave. You were a jet. Someone who seeks and plays as a scout most times.

You did the Quintessons hunt most of the time. Sort of gaining a reputation with the others even the ones who didn’t know you that well.

You were in some ways close to Megatronus Prime along with Starscream, Shockwave, and Soundwave. Megartronus like the other primes would have his own little group of the high guard.

All from his own picking and hopes to have them join him in his deception cause for the far future after the war was over.

Much like how the other primes have their own group of the high guard.

You always had a smile and softness in your voice. And yet you always showed time again and again of your strength.

Along with how you always executed your missions as you often enjoyed either sparring or training by yourself before and after. These brought you joy even as others didn’t understand. You also knew of sentinel but wasn’t that close to him.

You two know each other mostly on speaking terms and after the past cycles as you two continued to work for the primes. He always kept trying to get you to be his. Believing someone “easy” and so “strong” should stay by his side. And not with others who disrespect him.

A guard who uses swords that resides on your side and on your back. You were almost as tall as Starscream. Being a couple inches shorter.

Over time there was a sort of rumor going around. That Megatronus and Solus Prime were currently courting each other but were trying to keep it professional. You didn’t pay much mind to this as although you care for both deeply as they are who you follow.

That feeling of a sort of affection and even lust was something that you know should be buried and kept to yourself. You admired Megatronus as a leader besides Zeta Prime. Same thing to the trio but you never felt the same with sentinel.

At times you and other High Guards would train with Megatronus. Though you notice you were at every meeting and Megatronus seems to enjoy sparring with you most.

One morning as you walked from your recharge. You head to the training area believing you’ll see the other High Guard as you make your way. Once you entered you were greeted by the others as a few have already started training.

Starscream was standing watching the others train as he had a stern look on his voice. Once he noticed you his almost frown turned into a smile. he then greeted you with open arms

”Ah, Y/N glad you can join us. As always, I would appreciate it if you would come early.” You would chuckle and put your hands on your hips as you stand next to him

”Sorry Starscream, but I try to enjoy any amount of time to recharge I can get. My backstrut has been killing me lately.” Starscream would hum and sets his hand on your waist, pulling you a bit closer as his other one rests on his own hip.

”You and me both. All part of being in the high guard. But at least we have you instead of these slow seekers who just keep WASTING MY TIME!”

”Starscream when did we talk about?”

”That energon is meant to eat not to shove down someones-“

”The other thing!”

”Don’t bully other High Guard just cause they’re not as good as me..” He rolls his eyes

”Starscream!”

”To be nice! Ok ok must you scold me every time?” You nod and and put your hand on his shoulder. You two continue to watch the other do their training

After a few mega cycles over the direct private comm was Soundwave reaching you. You then excuse yourself as you walk out. Starscream already sparring 3 v 1 as he yells at them to do better. As you walked out answering within 3 seconds

“Soundwave?”

”Y/N. Needed at Megatronus training quarters.”

”Affirmative.” The call then ends and you make your way over to Megatronus training quarters.

He makes his way to the room. Soon seeing that you were alone. You look around as you look deeper and a begin to wonder where the Prime was.

As you were about to turn around the door you came through then opens showing Megatronus walking in. He stands to be very tall as he towers over you his hand resting on the door frame as he stared down at you. He then speaks, his voice deep and almost roaring as he finally spoke to you.

”More early then I expected. I only hope the others will start taking your lead.”

He finally passes you as you had bowed your head. Your arm and hand over your chest to show respect.

”My Prime-“

”Haven’t I told you, you mustn’t be so formal around me when we’re alone. I thought we were friends.” You two were sort of friends in secret. He respects you as a companion in battle. At least that’s how far you believe his affections is towards you.

”My apologies, Megatronus.” You look down your arm still over your chest. But Megatronus only glances at you as he then puts his spear down and does a few arm stretches. You stand there unsure of the others if they were to join anytime soon

”Remember what I taught you when thundercracker was able to hold you down after an hour long fight?”

”Don’t forget ones weak point around the arm?”

”Yes..I soon found after my last battle with those Quintissons basterds that the same is almost the same with them but it’s with those mouths. Pull at the outer armor hard enough.”

”Uh.. Sir?”

”I wish for you to try your best to defeat me Y/N.”

“So the others?”

”Won’t be joining us. You’ll be at a disadvantage with the large size of the creatures. You know this.” He walked up to you. Staring down at you.

You only stare up at him and just nod your head.

Looking away before backing up to put your swords down. You can feel Megatronus eyes on you. Once you turned around he was soon throwing a punch at you.

You were able to dodge it sort fo flying to the side and quickly grabbing his fast lifting up your body to use your legs to kick the side of his head. You can hear him frown as you then push yourself up on his arm and land on his back. Getting on your arms and pushing yourself far behind him as he turns and look at you in a fast motion.

When he charges at you, you only got on fours moving in a quick motion to left and right dodging his punches as he stands over you.

He was close to fully grabbing your waist. But using you body strength to move yourself. Grabbing his arm with both hands you turned youself upside down your legs landing on his arm.

Then jumping up high so you’re over him about to kick him over the head until he catches your leg.

”Had enough?” He asks his voice booming

”Not even close.” You respond as he then throws you into the ground. But you were fast on your arms and feet again.

Taking in the impact. Something you grew use to whenever you trained under him. A couple mega-cycles go by as you and he keep at it. He was able to throw in a few good punches into you as you did as well. Though he did put in a bit more blows but seems to always avoid your head

Then before you know it your shift for the evening to midnight was in one mega cycle. He had you pinned down by your chest as you tried to catch your breath. He was over you almost out of breath as well

”As always you’re the only one who can get as much of a punch in me as the other Primes. Maybe there’s a Prime in your spark….after all.” You two stay silent for a little while longer until you let out a small sigh

”I should…start heading for my lunch before my shift….Megtraonus..” he seemed almost disappointed. Though it was hard to tell with his mask. But you can see he narrrowed his eyes and leaned down

”Tell me….” He said in almost a whisper. His mask only inches away from your face as he glared

”Do you believe that silly rumor…Of me courting Solus.”

”It’s not my place to care and worry of such things-

“I’ve seen the way you looked at me Y/N. And that ridicules could not be more false…” He uses the hand that was on your chest to move to you face gently cupping the side of your face

”And yet you still said nothing. Do you truly fear me for being a Prime?” You shake you head

”No I-“

”Silence.” He put his thumb over your eyes. You put your hands on his arm only to hear him remove his mask. You then stop. He leaned his head down to be right next to yours as you then feel his breath on your neck

”Megatronus?-“ You’re startled as you feel his lips on your shoulder. You try your best not to move but also wondered if you can even stop him. He kisses your neck slowly making his way past your jaw to your lips. Before he touches you lips he stops for a moment

”Megatronu-“ He interrupts you. Kissing your lips finally as his other hand rests wrapping almost around your waist.

His thumb gently rubbing over your chest. You took note he was very gently givin his large size. Basically covering you with his body as he continues to press kisses on your lips.

You tried your best to not return the kiss but when he gently squeezed his hand around your waist you gave in leaning up closer to return the kiss. He smirks carrying out the kiss.

You the get a direct comm from Soundwave as you tried you best to gain your self control. Your hands gently squeezing his arm. The one that has his hand over your eyes. When you tried to turn your head and even back with the little space you have.

His hand over your eyes only stay firm to keep you in place. Your hands find their self on his chest. He stops lifting his head a little but only a few inches.

”Megatronus I must meet Soundwave. A-and this. We shouldn’t- I- I can’t-“

”You deny my affections, Y/N?“

”No Megatronus I-“

”Will you allow me to court you.”

”Sir-”

”Answer your Prime. If you so deny me..” You struggle with your words. His lips then touching yours once more. This even more passionate in a way. After a moment he pulls away using the hand that rested on your waist to put his mask back on

”Quite lovely. Waited over centuries to finally have you in my hands Y/N. Tell me do you regret our moment. Are the feelings to show daily not so how you feel? Do you not feel these “affections” towards Your Prime.” He removed his hand from ver you eyes as he helps you up.. Him now kneeling as he looked down at you

”…..I do..But it’s not my place to-“

“I shall see you on our next training. Oh and don’t forget.” One of his hands rested around your waist. Bringing you a bit closer

”This stays between us. Although in secret. I shall court you and make you one as a Prime. My word is Truth.”

You just stare up at him. You nod slowly and try to pull away a bit. But he kept his firm grip until he eventually lets go. Letting you go. You bow your head and make your way to retrieve your swords.

Once at the door you look at him. His back to you as only his head was side ways. Glancing at you. You bow your head once more then walk out the door closing behind you.

You then make your way to Soundwave your fists clenching as you scold and continue to overthink what just happened. he was right you loved it and wished for it before. But you wished for it with your other closest friends.

But you disciplined yourself for centuries and now that one of your friends, no your Prime Megatronus has made this move and revealing of his feelings towards you. You start to feel your heart racing. What are you to do if he does make you a prime.

What about your friends. Is he really this attracted to you or is he just using you because of his power. Could he just be doing this to any other High Guard. You stop for a moment knowing you’re alone and let out a breath

”He’ll get bored…..soon enough..” You continue to walk making your way to Soundwave. On 40 minutes (Not sure what the transformers word for minutes is sorry) until your next mission.

Yay first chapter! I swear my writing will get better. I definitely missed something or messed up somewhere. Hope y’all enjoyed it. There will be smut soon. Be patient my dears. NOW REQUESTS!!!!

I also take requests in my DMs. Have a good Morning/Afternoon/Night!

[cxndiedvi0lets]

Looking for help

TW: Verbal and Physical Abuse, Suicide, Self-Harm, Eating Disorder, Sexual Harrassment, Mental Health, Animal Abuse

For anyone who's reading this, I just want to say thank you, and even if I'm desperately seeking for help. I'm not tagging anyone. You may know me as Violet or CxndiedVi0lets on Tumblr, and I've been blogging a lot in a while.

I've had severe episodes in the past where I may have been acting too extremely or even at this rate suicide. I've already had the mindset at the age of 5, and honestly, I'm really tired of pulling this act.

I honestly just don't want to be in this household anymore.

Over the years, my mental health has become progressively worse, and I've tried to seek help from a psychiatrist and a psychologist and have been diagnosed with severe depression along with psychotic episodes which well knownly for my anxiety and impulsive nature of BPD which of course, my impulse is no excuse but I'm not saying its not hard to control.

I stopped seeing a clinic because of my brilliant and intelligent father, who simply seemed to know everything. Then, continues to mock me for my condition.

So, I stopped on medications and everything else even if I was progressively getting worse, not only mentally but as well as physically.

I begin to fail a lot of my subjects and further have been neglecting my health but, Its not what im going through details.

The part where I've really finally snapped is when he threatened to kill my cats, and I've stopped telling them everything because they always use my past against me or remind it as a "safety precaution." I was sexually assaulted at the age of 7, which lasted until I was 12 before my grandfather was kicked out. To say the least things weren't going smoothly, I thought to myself it never affected me but didn't realized it had affected me in ways of self-destruction thinking it was just a normal cycle of a hormonal teenager which I won't elaborate my acts on which you can decide on.

I've had a lot going on in school. I've been sexually assaulted by a classmate recently, but I never elaborated on it, and his acts on me because I didn't wanna make a biggee deal of what I'm going through, even if it is over. I still see his face every day in school, passing by, he was just changed courses and I tried my best to make myself unrecognisable by changing how I dress and my looks which also kind of resulted me getting bullied lol and having my name written on those ridiculous smash or pass books degrading me and objectifying me. It didn't bother me... or at least I think it didn't. I've had a lot of rumours spread around me, and I have been oversexualising myself and making up stories to sound like im a whore. Stereotypical american netflix high school stuff huh?

And yet, I go back home to be used as my father's punching bag (literally) even when it's my mom's fault. It's always the case, and he always justifies it that me being beaten up despised getting bruised was for lecturing me or whatever, lol.

I also hate the fact that they'd even keep more pets like dogs just to have as a toy then neglect them once they begin to have health conditions and continue to get more than complain about them. They don't even have any remorse if they're dying or sick.

Same way of how my father used to lock me up and forced me not to eat cause I dropped a plate accidentally once lol.

I rarely eat, especially when they're around, and they like to complain about why I don't eat with them. I just like to say im not hungry, and now I dont actually feel any hunger at all, and some point that stress led me to gaining weight and overeating which of course led into other health complications. Like bleeding. Anyways skipping on that.

I honestly don't know what to do trying to hide a façade like this anymore, I just want to die or run away im never happy with literally anything. I can't feel anything, I've gotten used to so much pain, I just don't even react to it even when they start swearing at me or calling me names or anything. I don't feel human at all.

I just wish someone could help me maybe leave me advise or maybe send me something on my paypal just so I can earn to get out of this place. I honestly don't care if they think im selfish, I've had enough of this life.

[4pfsukuna]

Enemies to f⭐️cking lover Toji

Ok so ive been thinking about releasing a 3-5 part enemies to lovers(or something along those lines) for toji although i know the most common works on here is one shot smut. Trust smut will be involved… its toji

You used to be an american spy but japan pays nearly tripple. The jobs were quick easy taking 2 days at max. You had climbed the interest ladder for your ability to get things done in a quick and neat fashion with minimal mess and uproar increasing your salary from 4 figures to six in only a couple of months. Unfortunately theres another assasin whos getting in your way and hes the exact opposite of everything you stand for. 

Not only does he not wear a mask to cover his identity, he lets his targets know exactly who he his just so they can have his name as their last thought before death.

Toji fushiguro.

The biggest jackass youve ever met.

This wasnt your typical one sided beef where youd get mad at him and hed flirt no he had beef with the number one assassin who was stealing his target which means his money. It truly grinded his gears and yours when they made you split a salary.

“Might as well go home princess” you hear his raspy voice though princess was said in a derogatory way hes made it clear several times he hated the way you did things. Why be so… clean. Death is death.

“Fuck off pretty boy go back and crawl into whatever shitty little backroom of a laundry mat and return to horse betting” you seethe having done your research on him. Its not like he needed the money for anything important unlike you who wanted it for taking care of responsibilities back home.

This mission had been one of your biggest yet and you did not need to blow your hiding spot nor cover by arguing with his big ass over nothing.

You're grabbed from the crouching position your in and slammed against the brick wall not hard enough to hurt but it does press into your all black outfit.

“You can do whatever research you want on me but you dont fucking know me… you dont know shit.” he snarls lip on his scar stretching further yet you shove him off. “And im not a pretty boy”

“Please youre not the threat you think you are” you scoff attempting to bruise his ego and the way he steps forward lets you know you did but you never let your guard down to your surroundings and youre quick to pull out your gun aiming in his direction.

He chuckles crossing his arms over his broad chest and you may be uninterested but youre not blind to how his compression tee squeezes him in a way thats… satisfactory to the eye.

“Going to shoot me princess? I thought you were too good to get your hands dirty. Squeemish at blood even” he pokes until you release six shots shooting the men slowly approaching that he failed to notice.

“You fucking shot me!” He growls touching the tiny drip of blood from where the bullet grazed the tip of his ear just enough to break skin not cause any definite damage. 

Taking a bow you smirk before making eye contact with him the only gap in your mask being the slot for your eyes.

“Oh sorry about that pretty boy, ill do you a solid and let you tell shiu you got this one all on your own.” you tease knowing his pride wouldn't let him take the credit for something he wouldn’t do. 

“No i don’t want your pity kill” he seethes looking as if he’s ready to throw a tantrum yet you can only smile knowing you won this battle.

“Great more money for me” you grin running past him the location no longer serving you any purpose. It was time to cash in and Shiu didnt stay up past 2am.

Toji grabs your arm stopping you from escaping though before he could speak the faint sound of sirens in the distance growing closer.

“What? You goin’ to hold me here until the cops get here with these other dead bodies how do you think that’s going to look? A big, strong and muscular giant holding a petite young woman like myself” you victimize yourself and you watch the frustration grow in his eyes knowing he has to let you go.

“Its not fucking over” he hisses releasing you with a slight push making your smile grow even wider.

“Great more chances for me to teach a pup like you what not to do” you tease tearing off a piece of his shirt and pressing it to his ear. “Wouldn’t want your blood at a crime scene would we fushiguru”

And youre dissapearing into the darkness of night and he watches your silhouette slip down an alley until he no longer can. 

You may have thought you had the last laugh but he was best friends with Shiu. So when you near you third week of no assignment you figure its time to reach out to the former and see what the issue is. Learning that Toji somehow convinced him you wanted a break you decided it was time to cut your ties temporarily with the man and find a new “project manager”

The next assignment is the most you’ve ever been offered so high in the six digits it’s close to seven and for a simple retreival mission.

So when youre standing surrounded

“Toj

Waking up with a throbbing headache youre confused when you meet the eyes of a spikey haired 5 year old who is playing with a toy truck a black puppy not to far behind. He must feel you stairing since he turns to face you and gives you a toothy grin.

“My dad must like you, he doesnt let us wear hats in the house but let you keep your mask on” he stutters slightly and you reach up feeling the mask

[jermer10]

Hello👋 i dont know if you can but, can you do a drabble of yandere Sniper [tf2] stalking and kidnapping the reader[gender neutral]? And that he keeps them locked up in his camper van?

And uhhh, if you can the reader loves him right back?👉👈

If you cant do the stockholm syndrome thing, i get it. But at least do yandere Sniper please.

TF2 yandere sniper drabbles

suggestive, gn reader | this prompt was so fun!! tysm for the ask :)

tw: stalking, kidnapping, obsession, depictions of wounds and blood, drugging, abusive relationship, reader falling in love with yandere

drabbles under the cut :P

- you were aware of his existence a long time before meeting him, and whilst you had dealt with creeps and weirdos before, this guy was....different... - waking up during the night and feeling a presence in the room, yet finding no one once the lights were turned on; catching a glimpse of someone from the corner of your eye, and turning around to see nothing - for the longest time you had felt insane! "you're just paranoid!" you'd hear from friends and family - and then you had your first encounter with him at your local cafe whilst in the lineup ordering your coffee - okay, well, you weren't certain that it was him, but the way his bluish-grey eyes bore into yours with such an obsessive, aching, needy want caused you to put two and two together - and much to your dismay, he had realized that you knew - you brushed past him, hoping he wouldn't follow you, hoping that you could make it home in time to pack a bag or two so you could stay with a friend for the night - but you only made it half way down the street before being pulled into an alleyway and feeling the sharp jab of a needle in your shoulder

- you must have fought for several minutes before finally passing out, because upon waking there were bruises and scuff marks littering your skin - the second thing you noticed once you gained consciousness was the leg of camper van pull-out table you were tied to - if you had the strength, you would have kicked the table upwards and slid your ducktaped wrists off of the leg, yet your drowsiness and the numbness of your legs told you that trying to escape would be futile - for a second you considered screaming out - someone, anyone must be able to hear you, you couldn’t have gone too far out of town - you hear the stifled laugh of a man from the other side of the van - you turned sharply to look at the man, when an overbearing wave of nausea and dizziness rushed over you. “fuck!” you hissed, squeezing your eyes shut - the man chuckled, and from what courage you could muster, you glanced up at him. he was….handsome? - ‘fucking gross y/n! don’t think that about this guy! he KIDNAPPED YOU!’ the reality of the situation had finally set in - “who are you?! where am i?! please, please just let me go and I wont tell anyone about this! I’ll give you whatever you want! please don’t kill me!” you had started to sob - through the blurry tears you saw him get up and walk closer to you, his brown boots clacking against the floor rung in your head like gun shots - “shut up. I took ya because you’re the thing I want. I’ve been followin’ you for a while and I know you know about it. I got tired of waitin’, so I made myself known, that’s all.” his face was serious, his voice condescending, as if it were obvious - you felt hopeless, pathetic, and manic. you started to scream, cry, thrash around pathetically whilst he stood over you. he lit a cigarette and blew some smoke down at you - “we are a looooong way away from any people darl’, so it would be easier for both of us if you played nice” the man spat, and walked towards the exit of the camper van, grabbing a sniper rifle out of a locked compartment in the wall - “if you’re not here when i get back, i will kill you, y/n.” and with that, he left.

- months had gone by, and eventually you had grown placid, sitting under that table on your makeshift bed day in, day out while the man you had eventually grown to know as Mundy monitored you, fed you, bathed you, and clothed you - you had gained his trust, therefore he decided it would be best to remove your constraints - while he was at work you would rummage through his belongings to find out more about him; what hobbies he had, where he was from, his likes and dislikes - you found a photo of his parents and casually asked him about them one day. he was taken aback by your curiosity, yet he told you stories about his childhood and you shared some of your own - you couldn’t even hate him anymore, you had actually grown fond of the man in your time spent with him, but there was no fucking way he could know that. you still wanted to escape from this sicko and return to your old life - but what even was your old life? your 9 to 5 job, coming home to an empty house every day, the constant feeling of being watched with no one to believe you - suddenly your situation seemed a lot better than what you were previously stuck with - that night you had awoken, startled by a wounded and bloody Mundy stumbling through the camper van doors. “holy shit, are you okay?” you hated how it came out so earnestly - luckily for you, the concern had seemingly gone unnoticed as he had sat himself on the floor next to you, peering into your eyes for some kind of permission with a guilt and bashfulness you hadn’t seen from him thus far - you didn’t know what to do or say, so you nodded slightly, and on cue he pressed himself into your side, burying his face in the crook of your neck - he smelt like cigarettes, dirt, and gore - you didn’t ask, and he didn’t tell, but you knew he had a hard day at work. no matter what his job was, you knew all too well the feeling of coming home after a shitty shift and sobbing into your pillows. you often wonder if Mundy ever saw that side of you, sides you hadn’t shown anyone - you held each other in this awkward side hug for what felt like both hours and seconds, you honestly didn’t want to let go, but he was still bleeding out and you had been dirtied - “wanna shower?” you asked chastely. it felt uncomfortable asking your captor for something so….sweet? he glanced at you, attempting to hide the shock in his face - “yeah, okay.” he mumbled, slowly letting go of your warmth and standing up shakily, you followed in suit and head into the cramped bathroom

- by this point you had already been naked around Mundy, he refused to let you shower by yourself and most days you had been so exhausted you had looked forward to him washing you - but you had never caught a glimpse of what was under his work uniform or the red plaid pyjama slacks and white t-shirt he wore around the van, and a small part of you was nervous, but a huge part of you anticipated the reveal - you stripped yourself and climbed into the tub, chin resting on your knees, hugging your legs, and staring up at the tall, lanky man - a red tinge glossed his dirty face, clearly this was a vulnerable spot for him, and you couldn’t help but respond with your own red cheeks in turn - “….are you jumping in or what…?” you couldn’t look at him, the only sound louder than the thumping of your heart in your chest was the water spilling from the tap filling the tub - “ah- yeah just uh, gimme a second,” he murmured, removing his jacket and unbuttoning his top - his chest and back were scarred, some old, some new. you felt a pang of sadness. the irony of this situation was not lost on you, feeling more remorseful over hating this man than he does for kidnapping you, but you couldn’t help it. he was so raw, so genuine - he had stripped bare, and climbed into the tub facing away from you, handing you a bar of soap, you absentmindedly washed his back, it felt all too natural to you, maybe it was the steam of the shower, maybe it was the exhaustion that came from sleeping on the cold, hard floor of the camper every night with nothing but a blanket and pillow to keep you comfortable, but something about being here now, with Mundy, felt so right - “I think I’m in love with you,” you spoke softly, so softly you were sure he couldn't even hear the whisper, and before you could react, Mundy turned and pulled you into a rough kiss. you melted into it, running your soapy hands through his auburn hair. eyebrows furrowed and face burning, he pulled away - “wanna sleep in my bed tonight?"

[biohorror-human]

what are some other “dogshit” takes you used to hold but dont anymore?

When I was in middle school I was pretty transphobic and anti-feminist because YouTube sent me down the conservative "crybaby lgbt needs special treatment" "feminist destroyed compilation" pipeline.

Used to think capitalism was "not great, but the best we have right now" up until like a few months ago. Which doesn't sound like much but I'm 18 so I was basically a different human 6 months ago compared to now. Cause like relativity or whatever.

Really, really recently I started using Tumblr. And I had never heard of TERFs before I got on here (I don't use ANY social media except YouTube which, let's be honest, doesn't count- and discord, which I only used to find people to game with / group call with friends. I was not active in any social servers.) and so when I came across "radfems" I was like "women's rights are super important, and there's not enough happening right now. Let's see what the RADICAL feminists propose as a solution" and basically it was just me trying to sympathize with their ideas and being called a moid and told to kill myself but still sympathizing with their movement because I thought they were just untrusting of men and I could prove myself somehow. After a few weeks of that I said "y'know what fuck this I don't want to be your punching bag anymore" at which point I got picked up by the tirfs (trans inclusive radical feminists) which was good for a bit but they're basically just intersectional feminists who are detrans and think that it's trans people's fault that they transitioned instead of their own, so I stuck around them from a distance and ultimately ended up leaving after I got into an argument with the user "tirfpikachu" (large name in the tirf community) which went like this:

Me: (long argument in the form of a reblog that basically just says "I don't think your analysis of this post is right and you're blaming this person for things that aren't happening")

Tirfpikachu (in dms): (*sends like 15 increasingly angry messages back to back to back and then blocks me)

Then I realized "wait, I never actually got info from the "TRA's" that the tirfs and terfs hated so much" and sure enough the "TRA's" are actually way fucking better than both of those groups. They're also not even a group, it's literally just trans people and all the terfs do is see a trans person with a bad take and then assume that everyone else believes that. So yeah I probably could've skipped a lot of pain if I just believed the trans people at face value. But I like getting hurt I guess.

That's all the big ones I can remember. I've only been doing my method of "getting into arguments to better understand things" since a few months ago (basically when I made this blog) so there's not much I've grown out of yet. Basically I just learned what Marxism was and with that lens a lot of my views changed practically overnight.

[sidesteppostinghours]

posts that took me 6 months to finish making. so anyway,

its too late in the night for me to be coherent about this but

"I don't distrust you," he admits since you've gone silent. "You're allowed to be here." He feels guilty. Guilty over how he's been treating you, but also over how things turned out.

"I take that as you've done some things you regret." "Many." Her brows draw together. "And some I blame myself for, even though I know I shouldn't."

There's more here. You can feel it simmering under the surface. He looked away last time. It couldn't be that bad, could it? He could have, he should have…[i]not this time.[/i]

"I feel like I actually got a chance to move on now that you're back in my life. I don't want to be the marshal that messed up and got half ${his} team killed; I want to change. But it's…hard. Harder than I thought."

"Good." The laughter sounds genuine. "I'd hate it if that part still showed."

thinking about fhr and second chances. about characters that live and make mistakes and regret and have to move on anyway. and maybe they do, or maybe they dont. thinking about how it reflects on sidestep, on all different versions of sidestep, and the ways they can handle their rebirth. thinking about sidesteps that try to fix things with the people theyve hurt, or find new people to help when they cant make it up to the people they need to. about steps that have to bury their regrets to have their new lease on life, and the ones who manage to lock up the skeletons in the closet vs the ones who still have the past hounding at their heels wherever they go.

theres the way it all interacts with eachother too. like, take argent, for example, somebody who cant afford to do anything but move on and hope that she can still be better this time around as a matter of survival. compare that with herald, that lived his life constantly thinking about the needs of others and so has to apologize for every minute problem he might have caused. or chen, who has such an understated self-loathing for the mistakes hes made in one lifetime and yet reaches the same conclusion of pushing aside his guilt so it doesnt crush him, so he can Get Things Done. ortega and mortum are different in the way they approach regrets too, where mortum cynically accepts it as part of life and ortega has to find literally any way they can make it right.

just like. man. fhr is a story about regret, huh.

also have a bonus hg quote from the 4.2 about it because it literally inspired this insanity and itd feel wrong not to include it LMFAO

[i]The arms around you pull you into a hug as you try to think. Smother you in caring and worry. Loss. Fear. Not letting you go. Not this time. Not again.

FUCKED UP SIBLING RELATIONSHIPS YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS!!!! TO ME!!!!!!

[arundolyn]

relevant to nothing, but i wanna hear your thoughts on the natlan archon quest. am i the only person who's kinda salty with how it ended? i know they can't kill off mavuika cause they wanna make the archon playable, but it felt a little too convenient to me that capitano was just there to solve the problem. maybe i'm just coping since i wanted playable capitano. just wish the whole archon quest was written differently cause i'm so indifferent to mavuika. i still think she's cool, but there could have been more. hoping they make the second act of her character quest a banger. eh maybe it's just a me issue and i'm just burnt out from all the dense lore bombs in natlan -🍵

see. listen. its really funny. cause im a fatuihater on principle. i just Havent liked them. this made me like capitano. i was SEVERELY not vibing with him when he showed up and literally went "fuck it we're doing my plan". that was just Typical Fatui Shit to me and i was already rolling my eyes and sick of it. capitano actually gained my respect by having a genuinely interesting plot purpose and actually having principles he stuck by. i fully did not buy into him being all chivalrous and just like his lackeys talked about him being because the thing with just about every harbinger and in general fatuus so far is we're told one thing and shown a whole nother. this is probably the first time we had a genuinely altruistic harbinger, and also the first time we're shown The Bad and then Actual Good. every other time its been either Good no wait theyre Bad or Bad and then Worse. cant stand childe. dottore is just flat and lame because theres no substance to it other than He Feels Like It. arlecchino could be compelling but its severely hampered for me by her lack of self awareness. her and wrio are interesting character foils but the fact that she Genuinely believes shes better than crucabena and doing something good for Her Children is just such a HARD turn off because functionally she's in the same boat but with worse and deeper emotional abuse rather than flat out violence. i wouldnt mind as much if she like. admitted this. but she truly does seem to believe grooming kids into being soldiers is good when she does it so its like... nooooo.. nope. its So clear to me narratively she doesnt actually care for anyone in the house of the hearth on an individual level so much as theyre Her Property. her pawns. if someone gets hurt theyre messing With Her. this is just neatly dressed as the whole idea of Being Family. anyway thats not the point

^ i said that like a week before actually playing the last bit of the archon quest and like. i live in a hole so i dont really know how everyone Felt about the ending by and large but like. they won me over big time with that! not only was the scene really cool and the entire concept of no matter what happened there it was going to be cheating death was REALLY sick. that was a satisfying narrative arc 100000% and it was pretty well foreshadowed. im a sucker and told myself when i started the game like a month after it came out i was GOING to like the pyro archon and natlan no matter what bc something something native american vibes and i do genuinely love mavuika and enjoy natlan so like. im for sure biased. and it made narrative sense for her not to die yet even if she had already accepted she would. its also a satisfying end for capitano cause he actually achieved his technically impossible goal. he won against death! by dying anyway! and giving all the souls he had inside him somewhere to rest!

im also super biased bc the way capitano tried to kick the door down and say HEY we're doing things my way and didnt look like he wanted to defer to the people that Lived There that he PROFESSED TO CARE ABOUT simply did not sit right with me. heavy colonizer vibes. ESPECIALLY after the reveal that everyone would functionally lose their cultural identity if he did what he intended. and saying he cared about the people and land in question. like that simply Did Not Track. first harbinger ever to sit his white ass down and listen when mavuika told him to knock it the fuck off and honestly that was so real. they didnt fully win me over pretty much until he showed up in front of ronova and i knew Exactly what i was about to happen. they started to get me around the time he showed up at the flower feather clan but i was still suspicious. unironically him dying made me like him so much more cause it was actually. like. cohesive and sensical. some parts of natlan felt like a slog up to that point for sure but that was an Extremely good payoff for some things set up since the beginning. kinda makes up for the gosoythoth fight being pretty lackluster. i had also figured ahead of time they were gonna subvert the mavuika death bit and this kinda feels like the only way it couldve been done without being a total cop out. but tbh i get it and i doubt youre the only one since natlan has been pretty unpopular for various reasons

maybe capitano being there was some degree of contrived and convenient but idk. to me it felt pretty well thought out and when you think back on certain things even before he flat out tells you what his deal is they did foreshadow the whole being a vessel for other souls thing. interesting foil with both ororon and mavuika that way. he actually felt like a driven and consistent character when i was instantly under the impression when he showed up and started throwing punches at a god that he was just gonna be another guy here serving his own mystery agenda consequences be damned but he did kinda actually back up the fact that he cared about natlan and its people as well as his homeland and its remaining inhabitants so i do have to give props for that. like extremely. maybe its cause hes one of the only harbingers who doesnt give a fuck less abt the tsaritsa idk lmao. it was kinda sweet that mavuika conceded to him after he died as a sign of respect. cause like clearly after they werent opposed they had a lot of mutual respect for each other as leaders! refreshing to have a harbinger capable of listening to other people idk the M.O. of the fatui is really just wreck shit in a foreign land until they comply rinse and repeat kinda nice that was Fully not what he was going for. felt organic

[aannonn]

★ ─。colorful text , strong colors , bold text , brief mention of suicide , implied/referenced grief , swearing

okay i know we are all excited about the actual short that just came out but let me ramble a bit about Red cause im getting emotional about this stick ... ( before my motivation to type all of this ends and i dont feel emotional anymore lol )

Red in season 3 went through so much istg ;; not only did he and Sec went through a very tense (and needed) fight which almost caused the end of their friendship (+ Sec was clearly in the winning side here, or Red was just really terrified of her at that moment given to how he tried to run away from her - of which i will probably talk about it in a later post maybe), but he was also really fucking tormented in monster school (i felt so bad for him in this episode i legit wanted to cry)

+ after all of this fiasco he really went ahead and carried this thing (of which, given to how he hit it on the ground and it made a soft thump, it must have been heavy asf) all the way to the other side and??? fucking smashed King's chin which made him fly to so fucking far ;; which means he literally used all of his strenght to carry this staff, and dropkick King with it, even if it was so hard he almost even dropped it at first

AND THEN HE JUST. PROCEEDS TO PASS OUT ON THE FLOOR CAUSE HES SO FRICKING TIRED AND EXHAUSTED AAWRGHWS

there are also other moments where i think he really deserves a break tbh ;;

he lost a pet. i have a pet myself and just the thought of ever losing him hurts so fucking much to the point i can feel my oof'ing urges coming back.

;; granted; it was a minecraft pig and it was high with all the potions, and also tried to kill all of them, but he clearly atleast had some care for that pig ... (the fact that he immediately stood up and spawned another animal makes me think about that one post/tiktok (i dont remember the user) i've seen ; which talked about Red possibly hiding/bottling up his sadness from others , in order to stay happy and positive or because he doesn't think his struggles are important enough compared to the others' - which i think it make alot of sense since you rarely see him cry or something, just going numb and/or looking down in despair - the only ever time we ever saw him cry was when Green supposedly died.)

i haven't talked about this actual short before since i had no desire to , but damn bro the way i felt bad for Red in this(っ °Д °;)っ he just wanted to have red stuff for him aswell, since apparently it wasn't dropping for him for some reason???? okay he should have included green and blue stuff aswell instead of possibly removing them but. still. Green and Blue were so fricking wrong in this

and !! his and Sec's tense relationship in the past seasons ... i love Sec he's literally my fav out of them all but i cannot defend xem on this. i know she had her reasons and im not saying Red was in the right either but, gosh ... pretty ironic given he's the one who inspired xem to break in in their site and join them in their battle

... i dont even need to explain do i

he lost a pet ... again. and because of his own fault aswell ! he knew the possible dangers of fusing the command block and the staff together , given how he almost got possessed alongside his friends the first time something like this happened , and yet ... he did it anyway . and beeper died as a consequence . i cant imagine how much guilt he must have felt .. (probably one of the main reasons why he didnt put up a fight when they put him in the timeout box)

i think he wanted to cry at this scene ngl ,,,

thinking about this ; they are all really tragic characters tbh ,,, stepping away from the heavy angsty all of c!Alan's stickfigures go through , rygb goes through a lot of shit aswell , and tbh i just feel bad for all of them ; they are all such tragic characters that deserve a very well-needed break break/_ \

since we are in this topic aswell , i would like to mention how i really love Blue and his immediate rush in being a comfort for the others<3

i used to think Yellow was the therapist friend but we only ever saw him comfort Blue lolll ( i love him anyway ;; i think Blue is more of a therapist friend than he is though )

[krzdragon]

So i need to talk about Dragon Age Veilguard.

I really liked it and im fucking sick of all the complaints and criticism.

Look i get it, i had some when i first started especially in regards to some of the lore handling of the different religions and faiths (thats a personal beef i have with fantasy media in general). And the constant obsession of elves/ancient elves is boring and tiring in terms of lore but this also has me hopeful we are done with the elves for the most part.

Am I disappointed that nothing really carried over? Absolutely. But i understand the why and the way they chose to do so makes sense. Yeah they needed a reboot but knew people would complain without cameos. (People are complaining anyways).

I personally wished i could yell at Solas more; i dont like him very much and having Solas and Sollelaven constantly in my face from the fandom has made certain convo choices my favorite ones. I like calling him out and ill keep doing that shit.

But i found myself loving the game the more i played. I like that my companions get along and i dont have to listen to them squabble every time i bring them along. They have disagreements but they listen to you and work it out cause THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS LIKE SAVING THE CONTINENT/WORLD. On that note i appreciate that i can have a temper and be a hardass without being a supreme grade A asshole. You would not want someone who is obviously evil/not a good person being the lead runner of the people fighting Armageddon.

Does the Tevinter Imperium and Crows seem softened and almost retconned into “not that bad?” Not really. We deal with maybe two of the talons and their elites, a completely different ranking compared to Zevran who was taken from the streets. And its still implied that its fucking horrible for training, your rook refers to training as torture. And it never once makes killing for money a good thing. As for Tevinter; the shadow dragons save slaves, you still have to deal with blood magic and slaves and people on the bottom of society being nothing more than collateral damage at best. Nothing has changed at all.

I really loved the battle mechanics; especially for a console set up (dont know how i feel about it pc wise yet). I like being able to choose between button smash or pausing and choosing special attacks for my targets. I loved the rouge mechanics the most as well.

Really all the constant complaints sound like every time something new comes out that i really love. Its exhausting and frustrating and i just need more positivity.

[endomentendo]

Now before you read this, please know I want to get through this on my own. Don’t read my essential crisis right now if you don’t want my goober self depressing you. I just need to vent, I’m okay… I think.

You wanna know why I like wonderland? Why I say absurd things or confusing remarks towards anything? Why I like the spiral from the Magnus archives?

Well it’s because I think I might be in a more confusing state of my life, mentally I think. My life is normal, fine, wonderful! I love my friends and family, I love my parents, I love my family.

But why do they love me? What did I do to deserve it? Am I selfish and unpleasant? Am I just a selfish man who won’t get a life? I don’t know. And this is where my mind keeps playing tricks on myself. It’s not helpful when I’m stuck in two life’s to which only one of my parents is aware. Understand I’m apart of a religion and was raised believing in god. But after the split, my world was shattered, only for a while. But after a few years I’ve now gotten into a double life, and was given a different world view. Tugged on one side to the other back and forth. I’m struggling trusting each of my actions. And understanding who I am.

This lead to me getting more and more confused. Now I’m asking questions what’s real or what isn’t? I’m questioning the start of the world, I cannot comprehend how a start is possible. Call me dumb because maybe I am, but why did the Big Bang explode? What even caused it? And if there was a cause, where do they come from? Why were they there to begin with?

Then questions became only assumptions of whatever came to mind. Then more questions. Why is there color? What even is past the color wheel? Why do specific food kill or support us? Why do we need food? Why are there germs, tiny things, MICROSCOPIC THINGS!? Why do they serve their purpose, are they even aware? Do I unconsciously crush an entire ecosystem, invisible to the naked eye, KILLING what were innocents who never knew I never knew of them.

Now I’m realizing how made up everything really is. There is no such thing as a name, we give names in order to know who is in front of us, to announce. Shouldn’t we remember by faces? Or mentioning a feature? Then again familiarity is also made up. Everything is made up! History made for us to remember, but that’s all it does. Capitalism is for order amongst chaos, but all we’re doing is making a made up system of passing cotton paper to each other just to feel like we earned something. It’s useless, pointless.

I’m afraid to go back into the dark of my eyes, to sleep and see nothing, yet be able to look around. Sweating as my anxiety grows.

Time doesn’t exist, it’s just there for us in order to comprehend age. Birthdays are pointless since we don’t grow up on one day, it’s every day. It’s pointless to show appreciation of your birth. Even my death is pointless. Even if I did something that is know in the world, no one would care after a year or day. It’s pointless and it doesn’t make sense. Why do we exist? What purpose?

To live? To have freedom? To serve? To feel like we are important in an empty impossibly vast universe that it too could be made up?

I don’t know why I’m afraid of pleasures, is it fear of god or disappointing others? Everyone else does these things, but why do I feel ashamed? Why do I hate myself when my actions would be forgotten once I’m gone. Why would we be gone?

WHY?

Why am I bringing this up? For affection? For others to suffer as well? Or for someone to say how hypocritical I am? Or how selfish and nonsensical it all is?

Please dont respond. I just want to understand…

[ladylaviniya]

Tw dead parent post

I keep dreaming about my dad again. Not bad dreams/nightmares thankfully but-

I'll be hanging out with my dad or just being in the same room with him, he sits at his computer, illegally downloading movies and I'm laying on his bed or sitting on the floor near his feet just scrolling on my phone.

Sometimes it's totally silent and sometimes we are just chatting about random things.

But you know what fucking stings everytime?

I forget he's dead in the real world while I sleep in these dreams and start having a really fucking great time with him 🥹

But suddenly I'll remember something, I am 23 and now renting and have a great life (when my dad died, I was 19 and from ages 19-21 I was homeless or couch surfing). And just before I go to tell him about it or ask if he could do me a favour like "Drive me home, come see where I live, come meet my housemates and their cats which I know you'll say you hate but you'll fall in love with those kitties." I remember in a big hit- he's dead.

And that really sucks guys.

I then think to myself "Dont say it, don't ask it. Just enjoy the dream while you're here." Yet suddenly I feel so overwhelmingly compelled to ask things like:

"How did you survive? How did you fake your death? I saw your body in the coffin, I have your ashes. Where have you been? Was it a lie, a fake, a trick? Are you really dead. Why did it have to be suicide, why did you do this, don't you love me?"

And he just stands in total silence and stares with an expression that's like 'woops, just been caught, jokes all over'

And then I wake up feeling exhausted because I've had these kinds of dreams more than 4 times. And everytime I still get tricked.

Not to sound crazy but If ghosts and supernatural elements are real, am I being haunted, is he maybe not even my real dad, like is it actually a demon or something- like he feels SO REAL until I ask about how he fakes his death.

He doesn't answer, doesn't even talk. Just looks at me and I wake up.

I feel so angry after too. Like fucking answer me please! IM BEGGING YOU TO JUST TELL ME. I WANT YOU TO BE ALICE SO BAD, WHY CANT YOU LET ME KNOW FROM THE START THAT.ITS A FUCKING DREAM AND YOURE NOT ALIVE ANYMORE.

Please dad. I want to see you but stop blindsiding me, stop making me forget youre dead. Can't you just go "Hey this is a dream kiddo, so enjoy what you can okay?"

I can't breathe.

Fuck you! I love you so much! Damn it! I fucking hate it!

Why did you have to do this. You were depressed and were going to therapy, what the fuck happened, why didn't you talk to me! What did I do wrong! Was there any fuckong lifetime/universe where I could've said something that would've made you choose to stick around.

You abandoned me and I miss you so much you prick. I want to hug you so bad and feel your warm skin and comb my fingers through your thick soft hair and hold your callous hands in mine and hear your voice for real for real and not in a dream.

Um

Anyway.

When they invent a time machine, someone hook me the fuck up. Cause I'm crazy enough to go back in time to kill 19 year old me and take her place.

I just want my fucking father back. I want to start again. I want to go back! Way back! Back to being 6! Back to being his only thing. His little goose! His daughter who he dresses like a boy because he doesn't know how to dress a little girl cause he wanted a boy and bought too many boy clothes. Back to when things felt like they made sense, back to when he was my whole world and I was his... maybe.

Why couldn't I be his whole world when I was 19? He was still mine, my world. He was still my dad.

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

diplomats son by vampire weekend is lowkey sirius/barty though(i forget the shipname)

HI okay idk why i havent answered this. YES SO TRUE !!!

the meanings r frm genius so if im wrong im not dumb its their fault ><

it's not right, but it's now or never / and if i wait, could i ever forgive myself? - 'it's not right' for bcjr cd mean internalized homophobia n for sirius internalized homophobia + hooking up w a nazi but like this is a once in a life time opportunity and whoo is giving that up bfr

cause I'm gonna cut it where i can / and then i'm gonna duck out behind them - "sex w no strings attached" ... or is it ??? "im gna fuck off when im done w you" but like you cant ghh ,,, and like the behind them part too like its v secretive-ish -

if i ever had a chance it's now then / but i never had the feeling i could offer that to you - they r insecure boys <33 !!! they both feel so strongly about one another yet can't reciprocate it

to offer to you would be so cruel / when all i want to do is use, use you - this. this is deathstar at its finest right here. its fucked up enough that they both know how they only want the other to use them - for sex, to shed emotional baggage, to get their aggression out, to fight to whatevr but they offer the smallest kindness which is not letting the other in fully ever bcz what they think is love rn will then definitely turn into love (but like their own fucked up ver of love)

he was a diplomat's son, it was '81 - self explanatory i fear,

with my car keys hidden in the kitchen - okay genius says this is abt getting some1 drunk and raping them but um !!! i will . i will choose to ignore that bc that lowk doesnt make sense,

and the sight of your two shoes sitting in the bathtub / let me know that i shouldn't give up just yet - rare soft deathstar?? aw theyre in love !! :3 (or they killed someone idk)

'cause i'm gonna take it from simon / and then i'm gonna duck out behind them / if i ever had a chance it's now then / but i never had the feeling i could offer that to you / to offer it to you would be cruel / when all i want to do is use, use you - okay so according to genius + my brain is that simon (sirius!) is a friend (wellll not in deathstar context , but in the context of the song (i think)) and 'it' is sex? i think virginity but like nawr not here. so like if deathstar were ever friends this goes crazy bc barty (the one saying this) is like omg ive wanted to sleep w him for so long and now im realizing that i might be able to do it ??? + sexually incompetent barty is lowk a treasure to me soo.. and yeah then theres a little bit more guilt where bartys like i dont want HIM i want to sleep with him , i want to use him ! ofc sirius is just as apathetic and detached as barty is but barty doesnt know that !

i know, you'll say i'm not doing it right / but this is how i want it / i can't go back to how i felt before, there's / that night i smoked a joint with my best friend / we found ourselves in bed, when i woke up, he was gone - okay !! i've been thinking abt this in sirius pov . like post-deathstar w whoever he's with he's used to it (it=sex) being painful and quick and dirty and it's how he's used to it, how he wants it. 'before' is all the quick dangerous pleasure he felt with barty and the night he smoked a joint with his best friend which is JAMESS <333 because PRONGSFOOT <3333333 but i fear this may have been unrequited .... because sirius woke up alone ,,, which could have been the reason he strayed along outside of his social circle in the first place . on the other hand i like this in bartys pov where the not doing it right is sirius telling him how to fuck because kjskg its funni, . the best friend is sirius because ouchers !! angst ^^ !!! sirius wakes up and he's been thinking about leaving this toxic thing he has w barty for a while now but he decides if he doesnt leave now he never will (+ barty is obsessiveee he will nawt let sirius go.) so he leaves wo explaining anything to barty at all

looking out at the ice-cold water all around me / i can't feel any traces of that other place / in the dark, when the wind comes racing off the river / there's a car all black with diplomatic plates - post deathstar , both sides ? unhealthy coping mechanisms core they dont want to be back with one another but they cant exist alone . they remember each other forevr <3

[thatjaxgirl]

Rose goes to a stupid ball with a bishop and has an awful time featuring bishop, gore,Taliesin .

Ros: I feel silly in this dress

Taliesin: it does look rather gody

Gore: yeah blood dress isn't you thing

Rose: at least I can get drunk at this ball I hope .

At the ball

Rose: Sighs* no alcohol I'm sight

Casiver: you look stunning this evening I fear to gaze at you that I might lose myself

Rose: that but creepy to say

Casiver: sorry my lady

Rose: just call me rose please

Casiver: May I have this dance?

Rose: I mean sure got nothing else to do

As they are dancing rose step on Casiver feet many times. but guess who show up to crash this party

Bishop: May I have this dance? Appearing out of nowhere, without asking taking rose hand and begins dancing with her

Casiver: unhand her at once!

Rose slaps bishop away:

Bishop: ow what is that for!?

Rose: I'm not some prize to fight over !

Rose storms out

Taliesin: so how did it go?

Rose: let's just go

Bishop: princess wait!

Rose: not one word out you mouth again do you understand me!

Bishop sighs

Bishop: whatever be like that see if I care cause I dont

Rose: fine by me

Gore: *whispers to rose* want me to kill him

Rose: *whispers* not yet he is on thin ice

[scoy-supremacy]

Pit Babe Ep 7

I might not be able to type as much while im watching this episode, jsyk. (I've been typing too many thoughts down for each episode anyways maybe, It seems like they get longer every time.)

This is what I was saying last episode. Way and Babe never had a chance even before Charlie showed up. Im sure it hurts. But hopefully he'll be ok.

Wait that's their investor guy right?

Way, baby, its going to be okay. Look a suitor. That whole sequence was both really sad and bittersweet. I dont know much about Pete yet. Hes sweet so far, but also hes their investor, their boss kind of. Idk how I feel about it yet but I dont mind.

Also I saw that little smile Way. You've had your break down. Time to move on 😘

Oh no Kim went to Daddy Tony, this feels concerning. Is he gotta get yelled at or lied to. (Or killed)

Ahaha there he isss talking to Daddy Tony. I love Charlie, hes protecting Jeff so there's clearly something going on that Tony doesn't know about yet with Charlie. Im kicking my feet and preparing to cry bc Babe is very head strong. Even if he likes Charlie, hes very sensetive about him too.

Okay, so. This means Charlie has a super power though right? I wanna know what it is.

Poor Babe T^T hes going through it

Charlie is also upset

So they're telling me that maybe he doesn't have superpowers right? At least Babe is listening to him, and maybe we're learning the truth? Maybe?

Wait but didn't Charlie reference enigmas before? Does that mean he is one? I'm so invested im worried ill start biting my nails.

Sorry I guess I was getting ahead of myself (unless hes lying again). But now we know that Daddy Tony didn't know and doesn't approve of whatever Charlie is doing. But we still dont technically know what Charlie is doing either. Well I dont, I hope you're enjoying my nonsense if you're reading this. I sort of see these as me shouting to the void about dramas.

Im very curious about Kenta too. Hes not doing well.

Ahahaa I knew he had some kind of alpha powers. I suspected a Rogue thing but dismissed it too quickly, dang.

That flash back to the different moments Charlie touched Babe was very distressing. (And also the actor that plays Charlie is very pretty.)

Jeff had that vision of probably Charlie in a pool of blood and I remembered what id seen about this before with Charlie having to die for Babe to get his powers back. And now Babe does love Charlie and won't want to kill him for this. But I bet Way would... Way doesn't know that Babe is missing his powers yet either right?

I keep pausing it to freak out a little and ramble. I love Charlie, but maybe Babe needs to think for a little bit before just accepting him back. They're very cute and im really happy that Babe is so happy, he was so grumpy and upset all the time before and now he can be happy. Even being willing to let go of his powers to stay with Charlie, its very very sweet.

But also... doesn't Babe not having super powers put him at higher risk for shit with Tony? Or would it be less risk with out the powers?

Oh Way, baby... he needs to be hugged and told that its over. He needs to stop those flowers better not be for Babe.

Oh so they'll just fuck in the car while Way gets stood up. Yeah. That tracks actually. That seems to be a common theme for Way. He has been coming second to Charlie a lot. And I cant blame Babe really bc Charlie is cute and sweet and sexy (and maybe still a liar in some capacity) and clearly makes Babe VERY happy.

I wouldn't be surprised if this causes Way to have a villian arch actually.

I was worried about Kim, I hope they dont fuck him up or kill him. I really like him.

I like how I said I'd probably type less but im typing just as much if not more for this ep, whoops.

[tempest-talks]

irl quotes <3

hayyyyyy y’all, i’m back and if you want to see some of my irls here on tumblr C is @some-horse-gurl and Titi is @jarondont

one more thing, if you’ve read these before you’ll have seen E but she’s annoying and decided she will now be ‘slayer of dance’ so keep an eye out.

Me: “baby shot glass would murder the world” lady floutist: “i would thank it”

idk where the baby shot glass came from but i don’t trust it

C: “my beautiful water bottle i dropped down the stairs and hit two children”

C: *southern accent* C: “i don’t know what i did wrong to little Suzie”

C, who is Suzie? we don’t know one

lil miss muffin: “why do they have faces?”

C: “cause some of us aren’t creative” Me: “who’s some of us?” C: “me”

goth leaf: “dude is pizza real food?” lady floutist: “i don't know...i think pizza is just...pizzaaaa”

C: “that’s unfortunately my child” lady flouist: *offended* C: “i love you slightly less than my other child”

C: “i’m sorry but my other child makes my school papers look demonic.”

tomato: “tomatoes go on your shirt”

truer words have never been spoken

C: “what like .01% of the time?” slayer of dance: “No, no be nice” C: “I’m talking about myself” slayer of dance: “oh then carry on”

once again, i present, the ‘married’ couple

Me: “ew leap day” C: “lake be nice” Me: “the last one was in horror year i will not be nice”

C: “that’s too bad because you kiLLED EVERYBODY ELSE”

you believe me if i said this is about the oregon trail?

C: “have any of us died yet?”

again, oregon trail

lil miss muffin: “slayer of dance drowned” C: “YES”

still oregon trail

C: “that’s too bad because you kiLLED EVERYBODY ELSE”

oregon trail!

lil miss muffin: “C are you being greenist?”

watching the wizard of oz with your friends is fun, i promise.

C: “I hate when they describe a place like it’s so old and beat up” C: “I DONT GIVE A FUCK”

C: “my entire family has brown eyes including me, except for my dad like whAT DO YOU THINK MAKES YOU SPECIAL”

i don’t think she likes her dad much

C: “you can’t help people by bashing their head in”

slayer of dance stole C’s water bottle

slayer of dance: “i thought you were gonna say you can’t help people by bashing their head in” slayer of dance: *hits C* slayer of dance: “i think it’s working”

with a paper. i think.

Me: “… and you’ll die” C: “slay”

tomato: “why do i kinda want a lockdown to happen” Me: “because it would be exciting and you could possibly die” C: *gasp* C: “i wanna die”

we are very concerning

C: “when in doubt divorce it out”

Me: “i’m aliv-“ *coughs* *dies*

C: “kindness doesn’t matter” C: “Be a mean person”

lady floutist: “here C, try this” C: “HOLY SHIT”

istg lady floutist carries bricks in her backpack

C: “leave no space for other citizens”

Titi: “i am actually sobbing” Me: *doesn’t look up* Me: “are you sure? that doesn’t seem true” Titi: *offended* Titi: “i WAS sobbing”

she’s reading the oddest because she’s obsessed with Epic: the musical

C: “please just flip people off”

lady floutist: “what’s with all the ruffles this isn’t the 1800s, burn it like the witches that wore it”

goth leaf: “i love witchcraft”

i do too!!!

lovely, this was fun but i shall see you all again in the future, adieu!