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jjscrybaby · 18 days ago

Note

rafe or jj request!

his girl gets into a minor car accident and she calls him because she needs him.

maybe while he’s away for work or after they got into a fight — honestly anything angsty where he takes care of her 🤍 love your writing xx

jj maybank x fem!reader | hurt & comfort | (car accident, blood, stitches.)

thankyou baby!!! hope this is okay, i’m sick atm so not got a whole lot of energy to put into finding out info and stuff so i tried to rush past the hospital side of things😭

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

You’d never gone this long without talking to your boyfriend; three days. You felt ridiculous at this point, but at the same time your point had been valid. You and JJ hadn’t gotten to spend any time together over the last few weeks, not since he started this ridiculous treasure hunt with John B and his other friends.

It wasn’t that you weren’t friends with the Pogues, you were, but not close enough to be involved. You’d tried, and even Kiara had invited you over with them a couple times too, but JJ always said no. It was dangerous, he’d say. It wasn’t the kind of thing you’d enjoy — and maybe he was right. Except, not getting to be apart of it meant you didn’t see him, and your final straw was when he was late to your anniversary dinner.

That was three days ago, and you hadn’t spoken since. The blowout had been crazy, you accused him of not putting in enough effort and he went on the defence and said you were being dramatic, that this was for John B. You understood that, you did, but you hadn’t gotten in this relationship to be second place.

Kiara ended up drinking too much at a kegger, and you had the honour of going to pick her up and drive her home. You were on your way back to your place, still wearing just your pyjama pants and one of JJ’s shirts, when a car swerved around the corner and hit right into you. Your head smacked against the wheel and you groaned in pain, pressing your fingertips to the place you felt blood oozing from.

“Shit, shit! Are you okay?” There was a girl banging on your window, whilst also turning back to the car and yelling at the boy behind the wheel.

“I’m fine,” you groaned, you didn’t feel fine. You felt dizzy and nauseous, your neck ached and your head hurt even worse.

“You’re bleeding pretty bad, let’s get you to the hospital and then we’ll deal with insurance.”

She drove you to the hospital in her car, leaving yours on the side of the road. She gave you her details and then left, leaving you alone in the chemically smelling place with blood covering your face. You got seen almost immediately, they needed to check for a concussion or brain damage. You did have a concussion, and you had to get stitches.

“Do you have anyone you can call, sweetheart?” The nurse asked you once she’d finished up.

“Yeah,” you nodded. You didn’t care that you were mad at JJ, you needed him right now. You pulled your phone out and dialled his number, praying he’d answer.

“Hello?” He sounded irritated, he’d probably put it on just to talk to you.

“JJ?” A wave of emotion hit you, your voice coming out shaky.

“Hey, you okay?” The irritation washed away, he sounded worried now. Worried and guilty; he probably thought you were crying over him, maybe you were.

“I’m— I’m in the hospital, can you come and get me,” you croaked out, wiping your tears with the back of your sleeve.

“What?” He exclaimed. You could hear him rustling about, presumably trying to find the keys to the Twinkie. “What’dya mean, baby? What happened?”

“I got in an accident,” you explained quietly. “A car came out of nowhere, I hit my head on the wheel.”

He cursed under his breath, the sound of the door slamming closed came through the phone as he ran outside the Chateau. You could hear the engine to the camper-van start up, spluttering to life.

“Gonna be there soon, alright sweetheart? Want me to stay on the phone?” He offered gently, although you could hear the anger in his voice that he was trying to hide.

“Yeah,” you agreed quietly.

JJ talked to you as he drove, telling you how much he loved you, how sorry he is for not being there with you. You weren’t really listening, to focused on the pain you felt in your head and the anxiety over being in the hospital. It didn’t take long for JJ to be walking into the room, a worried expression on his face as he knelt down in front of you and held your face gently in his hands.

“Hi, baby,” he greeted softly, eyes scanning the stitches just above your eyebrow. “How many did y’have to get?”

“A few,” you murmured, not wanting to talk about it anymore. “How bad does it look?”

He shook his head, giving you a reassuring smile. “Still hot as hell, baby. Don’t gotta worry about that.”

JJ spoke to the doctor, booking an appointment for you to come in and get your stitches out, and the two of you left. You complained about your car and having to go and get it, but he reassured you it would still be there in the morning; “the thing’s a piece of junk, no one’s gonna want to steal that.”

He took you to the Chateau, instantly dragging you into his bedroom before John B could see you and go protective-mode over the stitches. He figured that would just give you a headache, and that was the last thing you needed right now.

“C’mere, honey,” he murmured, opening his arms for you to crawl into. You wanted to be stubborn, continue with your fight and refuse, but you didn’t have the energy. You laid on his chest, his arms tightening around you. “I’m so fucking sorry, baby. I should’ve been there, if we weren’t in this stupid fight I would have.”

“It’s not your fault, Jayj,” you soothed, reaching up to stroke his messy hair.

“I’m really sorry, about the other night,” he said quietly, voice emotional. “I— I fucked up so bad, baby, I know I did. You mean everything to me, fuckin’ everything. If you want me to drop this whole thing, I will. I’ll tell John B I can’t be apart of it anymore.”

You forced yourself to sit up, his hands guiding you as if you were made of glass. “I never said I didn’t want you to do it, JJ. I just never get to see you anymore. I miss you, that’s all. I don’t get why you won’t let me be apart of it.”

“It’s dangerous—”

“You’ve said that. I don’t care if it’s dangerous, I want to join in. I want to be with you and your friends. I want to be apart of your life, not on the sidelines,” you explained, crossing your legs.

He hesitated, the room silent for a few moments before his arms wrapped around your waist and dragged you back into his arms. “Okay. Next time we go on another mission you can come. If you promise to stick by me.”

“Mission?” You snorted, earning a swat on the thigh.

“Shut up. I’m serious, promise me?” He urged, although a small smirk played on his lips.

“I promise,” you nodded, leaning up to kiss his cheek. “Already got stitches, what’s a few more?”

“That’s not funny, dude!”

#jj maybank #outer banks #jj maybank prompt #jj mayback imagine #jj mayback x reader

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stvrnioloslvt · 11 days ago

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bestfriends? - matt sturniolo

genre: fluff / t.w.: none / check masterlist to keep reading ficmas '24 fics / pt.2 here

③

yells echoed through the house as the triplets were playing on stream, loud bangs heard from below you as chris lost a life in the game, hitting the desk in frustration.

you were sprawling on their couch, a blanket wrapped around you while you watched a film on the tv. your ears perked up as nick's yelling seemed to break the barrier of sound, making you chuckle.

despite not wanting to interrupt them, you couldn't help but be curious to witness the scene yourself in first person, checking out what all the commotion was about. you knew they wouldn't have any problem with you joining them, and the viewers kinda knew you already as matt's bestfriend, but they weren't always welcoming and you feared their reaction.

you sighed, trying to keep your eyes and ears trained on the tv, but you couldn't help yourself from getting distracted every few minutes. in the end, you decided that you had enough — no one should control your life, not even your fear. and that's how you found yourself looking for your phone, unlocking it and going immediately to matt's number.

❛❛dumbass💙❞

can i come in? wanna see what you up to

yeah sure thing

you tossed the blanket aside, stretching your numb limbs before checking your reflection in the mirror. you were already all dolled up, waiting for your friend to text you the meeting spot for your hangout. the only problem was that you were ready a good half an hour ago, and your friend had just woken up from their daily nap, which led you to have to find a way to kill time.

just then, another ping echoed in the room. you snatched your phone from the couch, seeing a notification from matt.

❛❛dumbass💙❞ ②

bring me a Dr.pepper

pretty pleaseee :)

you shook your head, opening the fridge and retrieving the drink requested by the boy. you also poured him a glass of water, hoping that it may wash out all the crazy chemicals and sugar he ingested through those shit-tasting drinks.

you headed towards his room, pushing the door open with your hip, placing the liquids on his desk, careful not to spill any drop.

"chat, say hi to y/n," he exclaimed, patting you behind the knee to signal you to bend slightly so that you were completely in frame. you did as requested, waving and smiling happily to the camera while your bestfriend opened his can with his teeth, winching in pain when the lid scraped his lip.

"are you serious?" you asked rhetorically, sitting down on the edge of his bed. you reached for his chair, pulling him back so that he would be closer to you. you spun him around, inspecting the little bloody scratch on his lower lip, finally commenting with a sarcastic "oh no yeah, this is definitely a red code." and then, turning towards the screen you called his brother: "yo chris, get in the car your brother needs your F1 pilot skills."

just then you noticed the viewers going crazy, swarming the chat with comments about this little interaction that was so normal to you and the guys, but so new for them. a comment in particular caught your eye, making you blush:

@chrisleftball: am i the only one sensing some tension? matt's looking at her funny

you turned around rather flustered, straightening your back, trying to act like nothing had happened. matt's hands reached towards you, pulling you up to your feet so that you could stand beside him while he played. your hand naturally went for his nape, your fingers gently scratching him just as he liked.

you were aware that you two's interactions weren't always what bestfriends would do, a lot of times being teased by chris and nick about acting all lovely like couples do and "needing to get a room".

you couldn't lie, more times than not their teasing only fed your delusions, but you knew that it wasn't safe for you to step up — a small risk could cost a big loss, and you weren't ready for that yet.

you jumped startled as a notification from your phone brought you back to earth, your friend finally telling you where to go after almost an hour of waiting.

"i have to go, i'm meeting up with a friend," you told him, caressing discreetly his hair to say bye to him. "bye chat! i have to go now i'm sorry... have fun! oh and matt, drink some fucking water please — i love you!" and just like that you were out of his room, sprinting towards the front door.

if only you had stayed a couple more seconds you would have noticed your bestfriend's cheeks color of a rosy tint, his hand flying to his mouth to cover a smile that he was trying so hard to bite back, failing.

somewhere, imprinted forever on the internet, a lonely comment was drowned out by the others:

@user56439721: bestfriends?

𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐏𝐘 𝐀𝐍𝐃/𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐋 𝐌𝐘 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊. 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐏𝐎 𝐈𝐒 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐄 𝐀𝐒 𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐓

❃ a.n: merry christmas everybody, I wish you happy holidays and a shit ton of happiness🎄✨️

love, bree ☾

taglist: @shadowthesim @sturnioloszn 🤍

#© stvrnioloslvt #bree's [sturniolo ficmas]#sturniolo triplets #sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo #matt stuniolo fanfic #matt x reader #sturniolo fluff #matt x y/n #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo x you #matthew bernard sturniolo #mattsturniolo #matthew sturniolo x reader #fluff

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tennessoui · 4 months ago

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incredibly self-insert at the moment but

silly lil completely normal and understandable au where anakin moves to a new country and he's got most all of the complex paperwork and documentation sorted so he thinks he's doing great but for some reason he cannot for the life of him figure out how to use the appliances in his apartment. and this is doubly gutting because he's usually very good at this sort of thing! he has a degree in chemical engineering for gods sake, why can't he logic out how to turn on his shower or unlock the washing machine after a wash cycle???

not one to admit defeat, he googles basic questions like 'how turn on radiator stewjon' and 'common oven hieroglyphs stewjon' and finds this youtube channel where this older (hot hot very attractive hot) man named obi-wan films himself doing basic things like going to the store and messing about with his car's oil and also explaining basic appliances and how they work in stewjon

and anakin is addicted. he is in love. he watches all of them. he doesn't even own an iron but now he knows how to use a stewjoni one and obi-wan even gave him tips about how to look his best (like what colors go together and how he should never wear brown shoes with black pants, etc)

meanwhile obi-wan kenobi had to make these videos like five years ago as community service for some minor crime (like murdering his neighbor's plants because they kept getting pollen on his car) and he's very confused when he opens his mailbox one day to a piece of...fan mail?

#kit's silly lil aus #obikin #obi-wan of course is old and crotchety and knows nothing about internet safety #so his address was incredibly easy for anakin to find #for fanmail purposes #surprisingly mr kenobi is not reassured by this fact #when anakin tells him earnestly #anyway yeah ive had to google all these questions #to different levels of effectiveness #my radiator is still not on tho #al on youtube has failed me #or even worse #i have failed al on youtube

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lisafication · 1 year ago

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Digging Graves for your Morals; Or, The Ethical Problem of Outlawry

Hello, yes, I am here again. This one is shorter, I swear (it’s under four thousand words, even). If this is the first post from me you’re seeing, this is a follow-up to my prior essay posted here on the game The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, although it should be able to mostly stand alone.

At the end of my last essay, I touched on both the game’s nearly uncompromising moral scepticism and relativity, but I didn’t really dig into it. I outlined that the game only textually frames actions as ‘morally bad’ in the context of a morality set by the society and the world that has treated them as no better than farm animals raised for the slaughter. Well, I have a lot to say on the topic of ethics on the topic of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, so buckle in, this one’s going to talk about the social contract, moral scepticism and everyone’s favourite topic: Mrs. Graves.

As usual, this was originally posted and formatted for on Sufficient Velocity and you can perhaps more easily read it there. Spoilers abound, and my content warning from last time still applies.

She’s not too hot on either ethics or her mother

The Meat of the Matter

Since a lot of this is optional or otherwise missable information, let’s review the premise the game gives us. If you’re already aware of all of this, I apologise, it won’t take long.

First off the bat, the quarantine at the start of the game was a hoax-driven money-making scheme of which you can pick up more-or-less all the relevant details of. This is entirely missable and by the time it’s possible to discover, our protagonists have better things to dwell on and have dialogue about, so I’ll give you a summary of what you can deduce from reading the notes and thinking about it.

The quarantine is an organ harvesting operation, as per some documents you can discover in the wardens’ office. They entrap the residents, test their blood types and starve to death those they deem surplus to requirements — alternatively the starvation itself could be their method of ‘preparing the harvest’, there’s evidence in both directions and it hardly matters — harvesting the organs of the others for sale. As our protagonists are AB-typed, the ‘universal recipient’ or ‘most selfish blood type’, they’re some of the first on the chopping block.

If you read through the newspapers and the documents in Mr. Washing Machine’s car, you can discover that ultimately ToxiSoda are responsible, and a similar thing is happening in a different city under the guise of a ‘chemical leak’. Should you further investigate matters, you will find mentions of the ‘man behind it all’, the doctor, or the Surgeon, as the fandom have been referring to him — you may recall Mrs. Graves mentioned someone similar! Yeah, he’s the guy who runs ToxiSoda, who are themselves partners with the water company that faked the parasite outbreak in the first place.

It’s all a life insurance scam, apparently

How much the details of the operation matter is something open to interpretation — it might just be something for players to figure out and Episode 3 will not cover the Surgeon at all, or he might play a major part; it's not particularly relevant to this essay. What matters is that it happened at all — indeed, it’s fairly easy to justify Ashley and Andrew in everything they did in Episode 1 (flashbacks aside), arguing that if they’d made any other decisions they’d have died — an argument that the victims dug their own graves, even if the Graves siblings put them in them. How correct that is is a matter of debate, but that you can make the argument at all matters, and we’ll be returning to this later. In my last essay (and again in the introduction here), I made an analogy to farm animals, raised without love and for slaughter. Let’s put a pin in the ‘for slaughter’ part for now and take a look at the ‘without love’ part.

That’s right, it’s time to meet the parents.

As Andrew notes, there are significantly more compelling reasons for you to say that

They Fuck You Up, Your Mum & Dad

They really do.

Our charming protagonists are, as with many things depicted in this game, an exaggerated, almost farcical example of this phenomenon — one that’s just grounded enough to still feel very real, just like the siblings themselves.

The late and lamentable Mrs. Graves is just the same: originally a teen mother, hopelessly out of depth with two difficult children — even if one was good at masking it — and an unreliable, emotionally unavailable (at least to their children) partner who can’t hold down a job, ends up foisting them off on each other and doing a Parental Negligence because she simply Cannot Cope. That’s the real part. The part where she gets paid off by an organ harvesting operation to leave them to die, that’s the borderline-farcical exaggeration that throws all the nooks and crannies of her character into sharp relief.

Mrs. Graves does not have a good relationship with either of her kids. Having self-admittedly fobbed the job of raising Ashley off on her son, to the degree that they did not even celebrate her birthday as kids, both of them hold differing degrees and types of resentment for her.

For Ashley, it’s hate — perhaps not quite so clear cut as that, as it’s her that calls for the eulogy and she shows some potential signs of discomfort while cleaning up her parents’ corpses, but by and large, it’s fairly simple and straightforward, as usual for Ashley. The sentiment is not exactly unreturned, either.

This brings Ashley’s heart great delight!

The most clear incident raising her from everyday ‘neglectful’ to ‘wow she wanted nothing to do with this kid’ is the optional ‘birthday cake’ scene, obtained by finding the present in Ashley’s first ‘transitory world’ dream, in which we see Ashley’s birthday and the founding of a lemon cupcake tradition between Leyley and Andy. She has received nothing from her family, notes that her ‘friends’ would say they were busy before she even told them the schedule and Andy takes her out to buy cupcakes with his pocket money.

This scene gets a callback in Andrew’s dream later. Just remember to Ask Nicely, rather than Kill Her.

Parents of the year, everyone.

So with Ashley it’s as straightforward and obvious as she herself is — she hates her mother, her mother hates her. With Andrew, as with Andrew himself, it’s a fair bit more complicated. His mother is a much more nuanced figure, who is believable in her role as an unfortunate teen parent who was trying her best. He has a degree of trust in her against, seemingly, his own good judgment In her conversation with Andrew, she acknowledges her fault in raising him and seemingly sincerely tries to offer him a ‘way out’, an olive branch.

I think many people have had relationships where they might say this

This scene in particular intrigues me, because she is acknowledging fault in a way that Andrew strictly avoids doing — and well, there’s nothing Andrew likes more than a good way to avoid acknowledging any fault of his own. With her dominant relationship over their father as a model for Andrew to draw comparisons to his own relationship with Ashley with, it’s no surprise that the narrative resonates with him to the point of ‘Accept’ being many people’s first completion.

Of course, that’s not all there is to it. There is a fascinating contrast with her later conversation with Ashley, where she — despite accusing Ashley of brainwashing Andrew — refers to Leyley and Andy as ‘two psychos’ and states that she always knew they were responsible for Nina’s death and that, implicitly, they owe her for not turning them in.

There's something about mother-daughter relationships here that I just do not have the time or reading to dig into, unfortunately.

Meanwhile, when Andrew interrogates her on her possession of their death certificates, she has… an interesting, plausible story about a life insurance scam and claims that she really did think they died in the fire, implicitly denying the claim that she sold them. It’s entirely possible that she’s describing the details of the ‘scam’ correctly — you can even buy that she genuinely does care for Andrew in some way, if not Ashley, but her claim about being an honest, grieving parent shocked at their deaths… doesn’t add up?

This is a very normal reaction to your supposedly dead children showing up in your house.

As Andrew himself notes after hearing her story, she’s full of shit. This gets into speculation, because there are a few ways to read this, but the most plausible ‘gist’ is that she and her partner were paid off in money and jobs to not raise a fuss — the surgeon she mentioned is almost certainly the founder of ToxiSoda, remember?

The overwhelming difference in presentation between how she speaks to Andrew and Ashley invites investigation — and when Andrew turns down her offer and tells her he isn’t interested in her offer in Decline, her reaction isn’t… despair, it’s shock — and well, there’s a good reason for that.

Why do you think she did it in the first place?

This is the happiest we see her

Well — it’s so she can finally fit into society. That white picket fence, that idyllic 1950s life — hell you can call it the American Dream. She wants that, or as close to it as she can get — the working-class teen mother, living in poverty, aspiring to the middle-class. It’s a very common, very real and very grounded motivation.

And to that end, she effectively sold off her children. It’s no wonder she can’t fathom why Andrew wouldn’t choose the same.

That’s the part that makes you think — just like the deaths in Episode 1, well- maybe the siblings are justified here, too. It’s a weaker argument, but it’s still one you can make under many common moral paradigms today — what goes around comes around, all that jazz. Just look at how awful she was to Ashley.

She’s finally found what she’s been striving for.

Here’s the thing, here’s the thing though — what, reasonably, could she have done? Andrew and Ashley briefly highlight this in conversation about Ashley’s ‘friends’ in Episode 1 — was she supposed to fight gunmen to try and break them out? Throw food to the balcony from four stories?

Moreover, as she herself says to Andrew… would anyone really have been able to do better than her in her position? She was seventeen when Ashley was born, living in poverty with a partner who couldn’t even remember Andrew’s name when he was a kid. Anyone would have had difficulty, let alone with these kids.

Her evils are — they’re not any deliberate action, but rather… prompted inaction. She didn’t have the emotional energy, resources or plain capability to properly parent her children, she didn’t have any solutions to their murder of Nina in a state so blatantly hostile to its underclass, she didn’t have a way to connect with Ashley and she took the money rather than fight a futile and likely suicidal battle against a corporation and its armed goons in a dystopian setting.

Ashley, notably, does not deny this.

Her sin is the one we’re all, I think, guilty of — that of not trying hard enough, that of inaction in the face of difficult tasks, of not standing up on principle because it’s just too much that day and you don’t have the spoons, you’ll do it tomorrow (no you won’t). It’s a petty, everyday kind of evil — that of not doing enough.

Is that enough to condemn her? Certainly, there’s a pretty manipulative read of her that likely has some truth to it — in the locked door in Ashley’s dream in ‘Decay’ you can discover that she has a ‘not-hatched’ tar soul — but consider that lens — the game won’t make up your mind for you, so you’ll need to choose that for yourself.

The dad is interesting in terms of negative space — but he’s mostly important in that he doesn’t matter, so I decided to not fit him in here. He has art, though — just no sprite, because, well, he’s never mattered to either sibling.

The Contract We Call Society

Right, it’s time to get a little bit Theoretical in here. Not much, but a little. Social contract theory is a complex topic with a lot of nuance, much of which I will be eliding in the name of not writing a twenty thousand word paper on semiotics, law, and anthropology, but the short analogy is… the idea that as long as you play by society’s rules, as long as you are a good citizen, a good person, the state, or the community, will take care of you.

In a number of ways, the harshest penalty levied by many historical states and legal codes was not death, but rather the criminal status of outlawry, a practice that’s cropped up a number of times in history — the practice of no longer being protected by the law. This meant one could be killed or worse with impunity — you were no longer protected by mob justice and, while overexaggerated as a term of reference, certain texts from Medieval England refer to outlaws as bearing a wolfshead, ‘for the wolf is a beast hated by all folk’. Never minding that wolves are actually delightful, this was a time when wolves were actively hunted and sold by people — and the same was intended to happen to outlaws. They were ‘fair targets’ as far as society was concerned, no longer to be treated as your fellow citizens.

This was the gravest punishment on the books, for most of these legal codes — something saved for those who had broken the social contract so completely that there could be no turning back (civil outlawry is… a bit different, that’s not the topic here). Among others, a modern critique of the concept is that it offers no incentive for improvement, no incentive to change or to cease harming society — if an outlaw has none of the social contract’s protections, what reason do they have to obey… any of the social contract? If that seems familiar, well, let me ask you this:

What if the state or community fails its end first? What responsibility does the innocent outlaw have to that contract?

It’s an interesting phrasing, that the world is better off.

It’s time to talk about the incest, and part of why it��s there. The cannibalism too, but that’s less impactful here. If you’ve seen me elsewhere, you might have seen me say that the incest is a load-bearing narrative pillar — in large part due to it being a critical facet of the siblings’ relationship, but in another large part due to it being an equally critical part of how the game uses taboo.

A taboo is in this context something that is considered repulsive and to be avoided by society. It’s a more complex term than that — you can also use it for certain sacred actions or utterances that are only permitted to certain people, for example — but that’s what it is here. Swearing, premarital sex, BDSM and murder are, approximately from weak to strong, some example taboos held in modern Anglospheric society.

Strong taboos are a staple of horror — they shock, they disgust, they draw people’s attention and it’s that last one that’s critical here. Incest is a very strong taboo — while I am absolutely not segueing into its historical context, the very well-established Westermarck effect gives it a certain timelessness and immunity to desensitisation that most other taboos don’t have — murder, to contrast, is a taboo we’re largely desensitised to in modern media and works of modern media have to put in actual work to make a murder seem horrifying — through atmosphere, cinematography, evocative prose etc.

And this is important because the use of taboo I’m covering in this essay is that the incest is used to invite judgment — it is so ingrained as a ‘wrong thing’ in people’s brains almost regardless of background that it forces the player to engage with the work morally. And that’s where the fun starts.

I’ve mentioned before, very briefly, about the juxtaposition of tone between the Burial & Decay endings, contrasting with the very monstrous difference in morality. Burial is remarkably light-hearted — they play around with the drain blockage, they joke about their mother’s personality and this is further exaggerated on the Love path, where Andrew is much more comfortable with casual contact and the two make a game out of how far they can throw their parents’ skulls, the humour is directly contrasted against their abhorrent actions.

I’ll be real Ashley is far more merciful than I, I’m shuddering at the thought of that gunk in my hair

In comparison, Decay is… bleak. I’ve seen it being referred to as being ‘emotionally sandblasted’ and, yeah I think that’s fair — it’s uncomfortable, it’s heavy and it’s just not fun. And this is the route in which, if you chose Trust into Accept, Andrew has bought into the narrative that his mother’s offered — that he can fit just fine into society if he wasn’t stuck, if not for Ashley — the route that ‘fits’ most closely to the social contract, to Andrew feeling the guilt that we think he should and hating the monsters that they’ve become, as the social contract deems them. Given the pains the game takes to attach the player to the protagonists, this normative moral ending is very easily interpreted as the bad ending.

And well, isn’t it?

Thing is, as mentioned above, the social contract has never held up its end for them. The game takes careful pains to point out to a viewer that they’ve never had the life that society promises people, so why do its moral standards apply?

The game invites you to judge the characters, and in the same motion, asks you from what principles you judge them, making a pretty good guess in that, like most people who haven’t spent a large amount of time navel-gazing and reading some very boring books by very dusty old men, they come from the society around you.

Love even has Ashley express this sentiment directly after the incestuous dream — she asks you — well, Andrew, but this is also something for the player to mull over — why this is what’s engaged your morality or sense of revulsion, rather than the desecration, cannibalism or murder.

Andrew and Ashley are both very funny and very fascinating in this scene.

And that’s the framing that it casts all of its own moral judgement in — even the ‘tar-soul’ aspect is… well, it’s unclear what it even means. Mrs. Graves was a ‘not-hatched’ tar soul, after all. Other than that, it’s society and the world being better off without them, rather than any kind of assertion of objective morality. Due to the present of ‘soul colour’, we’ll presumably see the game make some moral statements in Episode 3, but as it stands?

It’s nearly completely morally sceptical, in and of itself — it’s not interested in moral assertions or education, it’s interested in making you question your own morals. Deconstructive (not that kind), rather than dialectic, to be mildly pretentious.

It uses taboo and shock to invite moral judgement, but then uses tone, charm and our instinct to look for the happiest end for our blorbos to get you to recognise that these are principles you yourself brought into the game, rather than any it’s handed you.

To summarise: you’ve brought these principles in from society, but what do the siblings, the protagonists, the villains to the world, owe society? Enough that they should follow them? It failed them first, after all.

Closing Thoughts

This one is a bit less energetic than the last, tragically — my sleeping schedule is the stuff of nightmares recently, I love windy weather. Wait, no the opposite. Huge thank you to everyone who commented on the last one, you are the wind beneath my wings and the main reason I managed to get this out this week.

This essay is a bit more interpretative than my last one — certainly, there are alternative readings and I’ve been toying with the idea of deliberately taking a reading I don’t like very much and writing from that perspective as a demonstrative exercise recently — mostly that you shouldn’t just take my word for things!

Otherwise, if the last bit at the end seemed murky, I apologise — I did try to write a more detailed version, but firstly, it was three thousand words and secondly, I re-read it the next day and I could not understand what the fuck I was talking about. Personally, I blame Derrida — suffice to say that I strongly recommend playing through it with an eye towards considering culpability, morality and why you think certain characters are more or less forgivable than others, and for what deeds. See what you get out of it.

I managed to keep one particular thread open to wrap up with here — I try to keep speculation on Episode 3 content to a minimum in the main essays, but it should be fine here — you might have noticed that I refer to Episode 1 and Episode 2 being on something of a spectrum of justifiability, with the siblings’ actions being ‘more’ justifiable in Episode 1 and ‘less’ justifiable — but still justifiable if you try — in Episode 2.

To continue the thought of the happiest ending being the one in which they step the furthest away from common morality and to further jar the viewers’ sense of morality by contrasting societal morality and blorbo-oriented morality, Episode 3: Burial could continue this trend in having a major victim be someone who, well, has done nothing wrong and isn’t even guilty of bystander syndrome.

I wonder if there’s any good candidates, someone who’s sweet, harmless and will indisputably be an innocent victim…

…I’m sure she’ll be fine

#the coffin of andy and leyley #tcoaal #analysis #essay #ashley graves #andrew graves #mrs graves #nnnnot sure what the next topic will be #might do a deranged take on purpose #this one and the last one have been very grounded #I'll get to my asks tomorrow #probably #I've been busy sorry

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chemicalsgreenz · 6 months ago

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Car Wash Chemicals

#car wash chemicals #car care products

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rustedhearts · 4 months ago

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the one where steve is a hometown lover from the past that you’ll never outgrow (also mechanic!steve, also the same steve as in asleep)….

moodboard

“hey.”

he’s on the front steps of your trailer with a cigarette between his lips. the afternoon sun has gathered and festered under the weight of thin cotton down your back. it’s glowing bright orange on his bronzed cheeks. he spent a lot of time outside this summer. he spent a lot of time away.

but here he is, at 5:00. just off work. just like you, holding your keys in one hand and an empty lunchbox in the other. holding pulsing aches in your feet, suffocating in a pair of high heels.

“hey.”

one eye shutters closed when he tips his head back to see you. to inspect you the way only he ever does. his lips curl sideways to release a furl of smoke.

“uh…what are you doing here?”

steve pats the rickety wood beside him. his knuckles are scabbed, fingertips dirtied with soil and grease. 5:00. just off work. the navy blue collared shirt hand-stitched with his name.

your lunchbox swings when you step forward, whirl around, and sink down. it clunks with a hollow tupperware container when you set it on the concrete.

steve pulls the cigarette away from his mouth and rests his elbows on his knees. a fleck of ash flings toward the patchy grass near his feet. he reeks of chemical car exhaust. when the wind whispers through the park, it wafts the cheyennes toward your just-washed-hair.

just like old times.

"wanted to see you," he says.

you kick your legs out and cross one over the other. steve's eyes wander their way, hazel mutating into amber in direct sunlight. you haven't seen them this close in ages. haven't felt the solid heat of him in months. longer, if you thought about it.

you aren't sure what to say to him, and the quiet sound of lips latching to paper fill the space. he sighs the next cloud of smoke out. the sheen of sweat on his skin makes it glitter.

"how’s, uh…how’s your mom?”

you glance at him, lip between your teeth. “better. been clean a couple months now.”

he hums, mouthing at the cigarette butt. it’s getting smaller and smaller by the second. the crackle in his lungs feels better than the silence.

“how’s your brother?” you offer.

another bout of ash springing toward the concrete. it lands on the toe of his boot. they must be sweltering cages in this heat.

“back home.” you know that means not good.

using the pointed toe of one, you kick off your heels and wiggle your swollen toes. the cheap, glossy shoes scrape the sidewalk where they fall.

a few rows over, the hiss of charred meat erupts into a stream of smoke. the grill lid slams. a dog yips until someone snaps at it.

“we should’ve gotten outta here.”

it’s steve that says it and he’s shaking his head. head tipped back to the sky like it might be different elsewhere. but it’s always been the same shade of blue above the trailer park.

you watch his bicep spill over his knee. a bead of sweat drip to his elbow. you can’t help but lean forward and drop your head to his shoulder. above you, his head snaps aside with the swiftness of lightning.

the cigarette is gone now. steve stubs it on the porch and flings it toward the grass. you watch it nestle between overgrown blades, just behind a dandelion.

he folds his arms together over his tucked-up knees.

“it wouldn’t have been different,” you tell him.

steve turns away. tufts of hair cling to the back of his neck with sweat. patches grow dark where it’s damp. the chain of a dog tag peeks above the navy collar.

it’s his brother’s. the one who didn’t make it home.

a gust of wind rushes through the park. it flutters through your hair, flaps through the bottom of your skirt. steve tips his head back to feel it. you watch the sun gather and sit glowingly on his nose. he has a new freckle under his jaw.

“i think it would’ve,” he murmurs. it seems like a remark mostly for himself.

you felt your hand sneaking through the warmth under his arm before you knew it. worming through the gap, looping over his forearm until it comes back to you. once intertwined, you feel a relief waiting to be released. balled up for months in your chest, soothed only by steve.

steve drops his head down on yours. the weight of it like a paperclip, holding you together. you let your eyes close and imagine what he always said leaving his mouth right now. i love ya, kid.

you hum against his arm, cheek pressed into soft, slick flesh. in your mind, it mimics the same sounds of your usual response. i love you too.

"wanna stay a bit?" you say instead.

steve shuts his eyes. "okay," he says back.

when the pair of you finally move a few minutes later, you hook your fingers in your heels and steve takes your lunchbox. he kicks his shoes off near the door on the outside, sets the lunchbox on the coffee table.

he takes the hand that reaches for him, angled behind you at the base of your spine. your feet journey toward the bedroom without question.

he forgets the dog tags around your bed post when he leaves.

a familiar excuse to return again.

#rolly!#steve harrington #Spotify #mechanic!steve harrington #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington angst #steve harrington x reader #rolly’s blurbs #steve harrington blurbs

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sarafinaparvez · 4 months ago

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The Ultimate ˎˊ-

In this post I share every single step you'll need in order to create a proper skincare routine for both the day and nighttime; as well as extra tips for a variety of skin needs, while also bringing attention to certain steps that may just be optional and those that are necessary for everyone.

Starting with your daytime routine :

Step 1 “Cleanser” :

Cleansing the skin in the morning with a cleanser is *actually* not always necessary (though a good idea in some cases such as if you use hair oils/hair products at night and have acne prone skin) OR in the case of having a lot of residual skincare from the night before, that is sitting on the surface of the skin in the morning. Otherwise it's fine to just rinse the skin with water and pat dry.

Step 4 “SPF” :

The only “mandatory” skincare for the AM is adequate application of Sunscreen. No cleanser or moisturizer necessary (as mentioned above). When applying sunscreen however you want the spf to be able to absorb and penetrate the skin directly as chemical sunscreen filters need to touch the skin to be most effective (it absorbs UV and converts it into heat). This is also why if you do choose to use a moisturizer before sunscreen in the AM (Step 3) it’s best to use one that also contains spf or, pick a moisturizer that is highly absorbent (such as a water based moisturizer) compared to one that is highly occlusive; so that it’s not interfering with the sunscreen penetrating the skin. Reapply as often as needed especially if out doors or in contact with sun exposure (like indoor windows). Every 2 hours is suggested from day to evening.

As for Step 2: “Vitamin C“ :

Is also optional, and most dermatologists I have researched or spoke with generally say to “decide’ for yourself whether or not you want to add it in your routine. This is due to the fact that it’s quite difficult to “prove” the efficacy of the L ascorbic acid with aiding in sun protection and even skin tone complexation etc. (This is ingredient your looking for to get the benefits of what Vitamin C products claim to do on the skin). This questionability is due to various factors that contribute to the Vitamin C product being “stable” and effective. I myself am not currently using a Vitamin C product in my routine (but have in the past) and will update this page on my previous/new experiences when I do reintroduce it. I will recommend that you only purchase a Vitamin C that firstly has “L ascorbic acid as its main form of vehicle. (This is the most reliable stable form of Vit C) and, that you also purchase it from a ”Derm Brand” which may make it an expensive purchase. (More info below in my personal products and recommendations section of this page soon).

Other Tips and notes for skincare in the AM:

Avoid SPF sticks and sprays as they do not nearly have enough coverage to protect you from the sun and remember that makeup containing SPF (though better than makeup that doesn't) does not contain nearly the amount of “Sun Protection Factor” to protect your skin as a regular sunscreen lotion would typically. Although I love makeup I try not to wear it very regularly in the summer if not an event; just so that I can apply SPF instead. Also keeping hand sanitizer with you is a good way to disinfect your hands if you do not have access to a wash station/soap/water etc.

If your short on time in the morning just apply spf after rinsing the skin with water and/or take your spf bottle with you! Remember to keep your sunscreen out of hot cars, humid bathrooms or freezing environments to keep the product effective.

For the Nighttime :

If wearing eye makeup treat this as Step 1, and remove with micellar water first (or product of choice) and cotton pads. Hold cotton pad to eye for about 15 seconds minimum and swipe across gently back and forth to remove makeup. This avoids harsh tugging of the skin which may effect skin elasticity or cause irritation. I like to take an extra cotton pad after, fold it in half and drench the “outer fold” to remove makeup from the upper and lower lash line diligently. Ignoring this area can encourage old makeup to enter your eyes. The reason why I prefer having this step in routine, as opposed to just using the same cleanser or balm as I would my face to remove eye makeup is because it’s more thorough in removal, requires less effort and is less messy which makes me more inclined to do my skincare routine on time when I need to. (That’s important!) But if you don’t tend to wear a lot of heavy eye makeup that requires some effort to remove it’s definitely fine skipping this step.

1. Cleanse rest of the face from sunscreen/make up/lotion/daily dirt and grime as need be with any making removing oil or balm cleanser. Make sure to double/triple cleanse as needed. I will often use cotton pads and micellar water to remove my first layer of makeup just as I did with my eyes and then follow through will the oil/balm cleanser as the second step. If i’m not wearing makeup, I don’t use micellar water on my face and just my cleanser of choice once or twice.

2. Apply serum/hydrating product all over face, neck and eyes. I consider this “the supplementary skin step”, similar to taking a supplement, you can choose to add extra serums, toners, essences etc. to aid in extra hydration, or even introduce products that may address certain skin textural issues etc. There’s a boat load of products you can choose for this step but you will never go wrong with a hydrating serum or essence to give your skin a boost that will make a visible difference than just using your moisturizer alone. Some choose to layer multiple products in this step and if you do the thinnest is generally what you would use first. Overcomplicating this step is common; especially for skin care lovers which may lead to various issues such as irritation from too many products. I left more details on my skincare page in the section below where I touch of various products causing irritation if you want more direction or tips on how to choose the right type of serum/essence/toner for you based on the intended outcome you are trying to achieve.

3. Apply a small amount of eye retinol to the under eye area only.

4. Apply moisturizer all over face neck and eyes (lightly dab over the eye area too, where you placed the retinol (optional). Dabbing is important so you do not move around the eye retinol. Alternatively, you can use eye moisturizer first and eye retinol on top. I prefer the way around, as eye-retinols are quite gentle on my under eye area so I benefit from that direct retinol-to-skin contact.

5. Apply Tretinoin/other related product everywhere *except* the eye area (both the under eyes and lids). Be careful not to bring the tretinoin to close the eye area where you may have spread the eye retinol product out so that you are not layering multiple retinoids on top of one another. Use cautiously around sides of nose, chin and mouth as these area tend to be too sensitizing of a location for many people to tolerate the use of this product. Any area that has repetitive dryness or flakiness (long-term) past the initial “purging adjustment” stage is too sensitive to tolerate the product. Using tret/other in these areas may be causing inflammation of the skin or barrier damage.

*** Optional Step apply an extra layer of any simple occlusive face/body lotion over the entire face if you’d like to seal in the hydration (optional)- when implementing this step after retinol its considered the “sandwich method” (moisturizer, retinol, moisturizer) which some claim helps the skin better tolerate retinoids but I use just to help to keep the skin’s hydration sealed overnight; particularly in the winter season when my room is blasting hot air throughout the night. I also found it helped when I was previously on 0.05 tret (a concentration that I felt was a bit too sensitizing for me at the start).

6. Always remember chap stick & Vaseline for the lips. Any petroleum jelly product ontop of chap stick of choice can be applied for extra protection. Petroleum jelly is optional but the chap stick is recommended.

Other tips and notes for skincare in the PM :

If you find a night in which you are tired before bed just cleanse and moisturize. This is the only mandatory step of your nighttime routine as the skin regenerates and “builds” itself during sleep and simply needs to be kept clean and protected. Just as failure to not address adequate sun protection in the morning with lead to premature aging and other potential complications- so will not sleeping with a clean face at night; so both steps need to be done committedly. Even if you chose not to wear sunscreen in the daytime (though I doubt someone taking that option is reading this page) washing your face at night is a basic hygiene practice if anything just as taking a shower is. So don’t be disgusting. 😂

In essence, products that will makeup your routine include :

* Moisturizer

* Cleanser that can remove makeup & be gentle on your skin

* Eye makeup remover (if you need it)

* “Hydrator” (essence/ampule/serum etc.)

* Night Active for FACE (Retinol/Retinoid/Tretinoin/Vitamin A derivative of choice etc.)

* Night Active for EYES (Retinol/Retinoid/Tretinoin/Vitamin A derivative of choice etc.)

* Lip Balm

* Lip SPF (non drying)

As mentioned above, for the entire detailed and thorough guide where I touch on :

My Favourite Products/Recommendations

Acne Prone Skin

Starting Retinol

Korean vs French vs Japanese products

Seasonal Skincare Tips + More!

Follow this link below to be Guided to my Skincare Site :

Please reblog, like, and share this post if you found it helpful at all 💖

Love, Sarafina

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