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astrolovecosmos · 1 year ago

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The 5th House + Romantic Themes/Tropes

Aries in the 5th House: Knight or hero saving their damsel in distress, competitor suitors, "bad boy/bad girl" with "nice guy/girl" dynamics, queen/princess saving the king/prince, a hard to catch chase, red roses and red lipstick, athlete or warrior connected love story, second chance love stories, couple vs. nature or unknown as they pioneer a new frontier, lingerie, things move fast, "no one else like you", fated lovers, lover's quarrels, innocent love, first loves, love at first sight.

Taurus in the 5th House: Worshipping each other's bodies, making love in nature, paradise themes, fancy venues, luxury, secret prince/billionaire stories, Cinderella-like stories, seduction, sensuality, aphrodisiacs, massages, the fastest way to their heart is through the stomach, willpower, ugly duckling themes, silk and cashmere, kisses on the neck, serenading, rose petals on the bed.

Gemini in the 5th House: Friends to lovers, pretend relationship tropes, sexting, online dating stories, pen pal lovers, long distance relationships, romantic academia, coffee dates, study dates, eloquence, unexpected softness, talking dirty, rivalries to lovers, Kama Sutra, twists and turns, love letters, vocalness, teasing, arguments.

Cancer in the 5th House: Old friend or flame love stories - maybe similar to second chances, parent trap themes, moonlight, waterfalls, ocean waves, baths, intimacy in the shower, cuddles, feeling wanted or needed, private or secret lovers, waterbeds, remembering and celebrating important dates like anniversaries and birthdays, sentimental love, nurturing their lover back to health themes, pearls and silver, traditional love themes, Romeo and Juliette, Titanic vibes, homecooked meals or lunches, long hugs.

Leo in the 5th House: Holiday romances or flings, everyone else can see how fated or good they are with someone - but they themselves are oblivious, wine, dance floors, flattery, adoration, gold, luxury, sex on the beach, roleplay, hot-blooded passion, romance that involves royalty, center of attention, turns heads, strip tease, mirror on the ceiling, professing undying love, great adventures, drama galore or a love worthy of the stage.

Virgo in the 5th House: High School sweethearts, devoted lover who does a service or keeps a promise for a dead partner, defending someone's honor or being defended, saving their lover from a bad partner or ex, loyal servant and royalty loves, light tracing, tickling, taking care of someone or nurturing them back to health, sexy outfits, plenty of praise and appreciation, couple's spa day or massage, attentive, caring, the details in love matter.

Libra in the 5th House: Love triangle stories, masquerades, balls, Parisian love stories or themes, opposites attract, wedding related romances (meeting at a wedding or stopping a wedding), lovers against the odds, love potions, star-crossed lovers, matchmaking, sunsets, pastels, clouds, rivals or enemies to lovers but with grace or focus on making peace, sensual moments, biting lips, charm counts for something, perfume, candles, oils, flower petals, champaign, strawberries or cherries, feathers, cliche seduction, inspirational love, love and art, love songs.

Scorpio in the 5th House: Enemies to lovers, dark romances, horror and romance, forbidden love, secret romances, "if I can’t have you, nobody will", vampires, magic or the occult, Phantom of the Opera, passionate kisses and touch, lingerie, naked, bondage, power, vulnerability, jealousy or possessiveness themes, leather, being by or in water, strong taste and fragrances, avenging your hurt or dead lover or being avenged, dark fantasies, secluded romantic places, overcoming fears or challenges together, psychology, villains and heroes, transformative love stories.

Sagittarius in the 5th House: Lovers from very different cultures or backgrounds, eloping, loveable rogue themes, fish out of water stories, deep thoughts and discussions, speed dating, daredevils and calling bluffs, adventure, "I can show you a whole new world", exotic romantic places, escaping with your lover, hotel rooms, casino or game nights, learning together, discovering something new about their lover frequently, lucky to find each other, free-spirited love, surprises and passion.

Capricorn in the 5th: Force proximity stories, love that grows or takes time, time-travel romance, historical romances, secret romances, age gap themes, gothic themes, consistency, lotion and oils, romantic music, power dynamics, fine wine, wealth and luxury, secret prince/billionaire stories, earthy and erotic, punishment and submission themes, respect and grace, powerful libidos, leather, antique or fine jewelry, beautiful crystals or gems, great smiles or teeth, unique bouquets, careful lovers.

Aquarius in the 5th House: Sci-fi romance themes, unconventional dynamics or roles, time-travel romance, beautiful minds and/or beloved geniuses, light touch, substances to enhance experiences or feelings, incense or candles, anything goes, the unexpected, unique gifts or romantic gestures, romance that shows how much their lover knows them, rebel lovers, acceptance, deep talks, mind melds, fetishes, spiritual and/or mental challenges, unique beauty, each partner doing their own thing, their lover being the only one to arouse passion in them or vice versa.

Pisces in the 5th House: Running to catch up to their lover at the airport, amnesia related love stories, hopeless romantic, poetry, daydreaming, soulmates, finding a muse or being one, kissing in the rain, foot massages, love songs, satin sheets, skinny dipping, oysters, champagne, roses, making fantasies come to life, eternal promises and fidelity, loving life and love, overly idealistic love stories, fairytales, healing themes, intuitive lovers or psychic connections.

#5th house #zodiac #astrology #romance #natal chart #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces

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vivmaek · 1 year ago

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STYLE AND AESTHETICS: Astrology Observations

Within this post, there are three different sections.

The Ascendant (physical appearance, character)

The Venus Sign (relationship to aesthetics)

The 5th House (self-expression)

SECTION ONE: THE ASCENDANT

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Aries - Known for their distinct facial features and athletic builds. They look younger than they are and always have bright smiles. Risk takers and adrenaline junkies. Always prepared to jump into something new. Their energetic aura is hard to miss.

Archetype: The Warrior

Tarot Card: The Emperor

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Taurus - It's all about symmetry. They have pretty faces and usually have round eyes. Something about them looks delicate despite their strong postures. Down to earth individuals and connected to nature.

Archetype: The Sensualist

Tarot Card: The Hierophant

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Gemini - You can read these people like a book, one of the most expressive rising signs. There's always a smirk on their face. They walk fast, talk fast, and think quickly. They lure people in with their charms and fun stories. They’re mischievous little fairies.

Archetype: The Jester

Tarot Card: The Lovers

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Cancer - Something about their appearance makes them easy to trust. Their soft features are beautiful and they move gently. You never know what mood they’re in. Elusive individuals who flourish within the private sphere.

Archetype: The Healer

Tarot Card: The Chariot

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Leo -Their high level of confidence is always noticed first. They have a domineering presence that looms over others, everyone knows when they’ve entered a room. Big smiles and loud laughs. They’re here for a good time and will go out of their way to make sure other people are having fun.

Archetype: The Hero

Tarot Card: Strength

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Virgo - These types intimidate people through their subtle expressions. They have bright and clear eyes that are always observing their surroundings. They look clever and are always put together. Understated beauty when it comes to their physical appearance. I think of pixies with this placement because of their sharp, edgy features, and cutting remarks.

Archetype: The Sage

Tarot Card: The Hermit

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Libra - They glow with beauty. Very charming. The most conventionally attractive. They’re sort of everybody's type. Girl next door vibes. The person giggling and flirting at the back of the classroom.

Archetype: The Princess/Prince

Tarot Card: Justice

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Scorpio - It's all in the eyes. That is the first feature everyone notices within a Scorpio rising. They make eye contact and want people to know that they see them for who they are. Did I mention intense? They have a heavy energy.

Archetype: The Alchemist

Tarot Card: Death

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Sagittarius - So cheerful and ready to join in. They have bright and happy facial expressions. They carry themselves with confidence. Always moving, they use their whole body to express themselves. Wild stallions.

Archetype: The Explorer

Tarot Card: Temperance

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Capricorn - Something about them looks resilient. Their strength as a person is immediately evident. This is the person you go to when life gets too chaotic. They look older than they actually are. People rely on them and they carry this weight with them everywhere they go.

Archetype: The Queen/King

Tarot Card: The Devil

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Aquarius - Odd-balls. They look different compared to everyone else. Calm, cool, and collected. They look detached. Awkward in an endearing sort of way. They surprise people with their eccentric ways.

Archetype: The Rebel

Tarot Card: The Star

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Pisces - Sometimes they look half asleep. Wherever they are, they’re not here. Always staring off into the distance. Large, emotional eyes. Old souls who have already seen too much.

Archetype: The Mystic

Tarot Card: The Moon

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SECTION TWO: THE VENUS SIGN

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Aries - These people know what they want. Very decisive about what sort of aesthetics they enjoy, and they tend to stick to it. They’re all about being authentic and they want their appearance to reflect this. They love bright colors and flashy prints, especially animal prints. They don’t care if other people don’t like what they like. They’re not highly influenced by fashion trends like other Venus signs. They’d rather try something new and completely original. Obviously, they like to present themselves with a lot of sex appeal.

Colors: crimson, bronze, canary yellow, admiral, eggplant, hot pink

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Taurus - The most likely to stick to fashion trends. People with this placement are probably going crazy over the “clean girl aesthetic,” because it's right up their alley. They want to enhance their own natural beauty. They enjoy the routine of self care, and you can tell just by looking at them that they take good care of themselves. They have an innate understanding of what's currently in, but they’re not experimental. They want to look pretty, not odd or strange. They’re also not trying to make any statements with their appearance, they’re only looking for admiration.

Colors: ruby, honey, dijon, basil, cerulean, mulberry, peach

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Gemini - It's hard to define the aesthetic and style of a Gemini Venus because it’s always changing. I actually think this is quite exciting, and I wish more people were willing to try things they normally wouldn’t. They learn about themselves through the ways in which they dress. They want to explore their own identity. They’re not afraid to embrace the multi-faceted person that they are. They’re always changing up their look based on where they’re going, who they’re seeing, and what place in life they’re currently at.

Colors: blush, tangerine, buttermilk, chartreuse, sky blue, periwinkle, strawberry

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Cancer - Being comfortable is important for a Cancer Venus. They pay a lot of attention to the weight and textures of fabrics. They might feel more drawn to high quality pieces because of the way it feels against skin. They love oversized clothing, and might even try to hide themselves through clothing. You won’t catch them putting on skin tight clothing just to look sexy. They’ll probably opt for more sensual pieces that move and flow naturally with the body. They’re also the most fond of outdated clothing trends and often bring them back into style.

Colors: garnet, amber, sepia, crocodile, ocean blue, iris, cherry blossom

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Leo - People with this placement are on a mission to always look their best. They dress for an audience. These are “it-girls,” who are always with the trends. They garner a lot of attention and praise through the ways in which they dress. London Tipton vibes. The types of people who never wear an outfit twice. They love expressing themselves through their sense of style, this is something that brings them a lot of joy.�� They’re drawn to flashy pieces that make big statements.

Colors: carmine, merigold, sunflower, emerald, cobalt, magenta, punch

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Virgo - Oof, these people get picky when it comes to the clothing they wear. They have a keen eye for detail and notice when something has been poorly manufactured. They have high standards and they put a lot of thought into the ways in which they want to portray themselves aesthetically. They’re all about accessories, which really elevates their look. They probably own lots of interesting trinkets that they use to adorn their appearance. They’re fond of handmade clothing, such as crocheted sweaters and upcycled fabrics. They can sniff out all the good clothing items within a thrift store.

Colors: sangria, clay, hazel wood, sage, aegean, grape, crepe

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Libra - People with this placement are prim and polished. They understand the power of beauty and glamor. They can think of things that other people wouldn’t when dressing themselves. Perfume and the way in which they smell is important, they understand this influences how people will visually perceive them. They balance makeup, jewelry, accessories, and fine clothing all within one look. Nothing appears to be out of place. Other people are incredibly attracted to the aesthetics that they craft. They make it seem so easy.

Colors: rose, deep saffron, macaroon, pistachio, sapphire, lilac, rouge

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Scorpio - If anyones going to have an extensive collection of lingerie, it's going to be a Scorpio Venus. They think about what they’ll wear underneath their clothes before anything else. Underwear creates shapes and silhouettes, and they understand how this influences the appearance of outer wear. They love it when clothing has intimate details, and they want their pieces to present a seductive quality. Leather, lace, and mesh are right up their alley. They go for looks that are dark, moody, and dramatic. They get a kick out of making people uncomfortable through their appearance, they like having that sort of power over people.

Colors: mahogany, spice, sand dollar, seaweed, peacock, raisin, baby pink

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Sagittarius - These types are going to feel more drawn to athleisure in comparison to other Venus signs. They like to move around, the clothing they wear needs to support this. Someone with this placement might dress like they’re going for a hike everyday, even if they’re not. They don’t stick to the same thing all the time though, they know how to dress up for an event. They’re probably all about the cargo pants trend, they love having lots of pockets for storage. They're the most likely to carry around a purse with them everyday. Mini skirts or anything showing off their legs looks especially good on people with this placement.

Colors: currant, ginger, tuscany, moss, indigo, plum, magenta

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Capricorn - The “old-money” aesthetic comes to mind when thinking about this placement. These types are incredibly chic. They’re trying to garner respect through their appearance and will opt for looks that highlight their elegance. They’re also very picky about what they wear, they won’t buy something unless they absolutely love it. They don’t pay too much attention to trends and are more drawn to timeless silhouettes. Much of their style is centered upon whatever career field they belong to.

Colors: wine, sandstone, beige, pine, navy, english violet, rosewood

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Aquarius - They want to be the most unique person in the room and will use their aesthetic to achieve this. They’re not afraid to present bold looks and they want their sense of authenticity to be evident. They’re inventive with their style and are always willing to try something new. They don’t worry too much about the judgments of others, they don’t care if people think they look strange. They don’t participate in clothing trends because they’re the ones setting trends.

Colors: brick, cadmium orange, pale goldenrod, persian green, teal, heather, salmon

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Pisces - People with this placement channel their inner fantasies into their appearance. They don’t set boundaries for themselves and will wear whatever inspires them the most that day. Their favorite tv shows and movies hold a major influence over their style. They can see themselves within fictional characters, and through this they develop their taste for aesthetics. Because of this, they appear otherworldly. Their inspirations are not based within reality. They treat their everyday outfits as if they were costumes.

Colors: berry, coral, pastel yellow, mint, arctic blue, lavender, ballet slipper

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SECTION THREE: THE 5th HOUSE

Within this section, I used fashion designers as examples. However, the amount of designers with accessible birth charts is incredibly limited. For Venus, Mars, and Neptune, I used different examples still related to fashion and self-expression. I also noticed that Uranus within the 5th house was the most common placement for fashion designers. If you don't have any planets placed within the 5th house, I'd recommend using its planetary ruler.

Sun in the 5th House: Alexander Mcqueen

“I design clothes because I don’t want women to look all innocent and naïve… I want woman to look stronger… I don’t like women to be taken advantage of… I don’t like men whistling at women in the street. I think they deserve more respect. I like men to keep their distance from women, I like men to be stunned by an entrance. I’ve seen a woman get nearly beaten to death by her husband. I know what misogyny is… I want people to be afraid of the women I dress.”

provocative, romantic, regal, striking, theatrical, dignified

Alexander Mcqueen is a highly celebrated fashion designer who defined what fashion could look like for women within the 21st century. Mcqueen felt a need to protect women and did this through the clothing that he created. He knew that women were deserving of respect and wanted to present them in a dignified manner. Alexander Mcqueen's aesthetic demands attention, it is majestic and imposing.

Moon in the 5th House: Oscar de la Renta

“There is always an emotional element to anything that you make.”

delicate, feminine, intimate, graceful, gentle

Oscar de la Renta cites his mother and sisters as his greatest source of inspiration. He grew up surrounded by women, and deeply admired them. In turn, the women within his life supported his artistic endeavors and pushed him to embrace his creativity. La Renta felt that each and every women deserves to feel beautiful. He wanted women to embrace their personalities through clothing. He took the time to understand his clients on a personal level so that his designs would stay true to who they were as people.

Mercury in the 5th House: Betsey Johnson

“Making clothes involves what I like...color, pattern, shape and movement...I like the everyday process...the people, the pressure, the surprise of seeing the work come alive walking and dancing around on strangers. Like red lipstick on the mouth, my products wake up and brighten and bring the wearer to life...drawing attention to her beauty and specialness...her moods and movements...her dreams and fantasies.”

playful, energetic, quirky, colorful, unique, tacky

Betsey Johnson took the high-femme ideal and made it comical. Johnson wanted to have fun with her designs, and she wanted women to have fun when wearing them. She was all about creating sexy silhouettes rooted within mischief. Johnson describes her aesthetic as “pretty and punk.” Girlish elements juxtaposed with edgy qualities. Betsey Johnson was especially popular amongst teen girls in the 80s. Johnson was the one who crafted the stereotypical puffy, pink, 80s prom dress. Betsey girls embrace their playfulness because being sophisticated is too boring.

Venus in the 5th House: Naomi Cambell

“I don't think I was born beautiful. I just think I was born me.”

dramatic, glamorous, magnetic, exclusive, luxurious, sensual

Naomi Cambell has held major influence over the fashion industry. Campbell was one of the first black models to reach supermodel status, was the first black woman on the covers of British and French Vogue, and was the first black woman to appear on the cover of Time magazine. She challenged beauty ideals within society, and opened doors for other women of color. Campbell is the ultimate fashion icon and was a muse for many designers, especially Azzedine Alaïa. Campbell is now an editor at British Vogue, and her influence remains powerful.

Mars in the 5th House: Jonathan Jony Ive

“If something is going to be better, it is new, and if it’s new you are confronting problems and challenges you don’t have references for.”

innovative, crucial, unobtrusive, thorough, minimalistic

Okay, who is this guy?? I didn’t know until I started doing research for this post, but after reading about him I think everyone should know his name. Ive served as senior vice president of industrial design and was the chief design officer for Apple Inc. This man crafted design motifs that have held major influence over the aesthetic of the 21st century. He brought focus to all white color pallets, translucency, dark aluminum, and slate. Ive played a vital role within the designing process of the iPod, the iPhone, and the iPad, plus much more. Ive believes that function and aesthetic go hand and hand, they are not two separate entities.

Jupiter in the 5th House: Vivienne Westwood

“I’m not terribly interested in beauty. What touches me is someone who understands herself.”

rebellious, independent, bold, irreverent, maximinimalism

Vivienne Westwood wanted her clothing to be life-enhancing, she put a lot of effort into developing the philosophy of her brand. She was also adamant that the only way a person could develop personal identity is through intellectual pursuits. Westwood claimed that carrying The Catcher in the Rye under an arm is one of the most fashionable things a person can do. Westwood believed that you develop style through the process of truly knowing yourself.

Saturn in the 5th House: Isabel Marant

“You can’t put together a formula for how to look gorgeous �� it's a question of personality.”

nonchalant, classy, understated, parisian, timeless

Marant is focused on crafting clothing that will last for a long time, she wants people to wear her pieces for years on end. Marant doesn’t follow trends and sticks to classic silhouettes that will always hold relevancy. Her clothing has integrity, and she wants people to feel independent and strong when wearing her pieces. I also think it's interesting that Isabel Marant has a code of ethics displayed on her website, she is committed to holding her company to a high standard. This isn’t something I saw when exploring other fashion houses.

Uranus in the 5th House: Pierre Cardin

"The clothes I prefer are those I have created for a life that does not yet exist, the world of tomorrow."

futuristic, unconventional, sculptural, clean, revolutionary

Pierre Cardin is an absolute legend. Cardin developed the aesthetic of the space age during the 50s and 60s. He embraces the avant-garde and holds a love for geometric shapes and patterns. Cardin completely disregarded the female form and was one of the firsts to craft gender non-comforming clothing. Many of his pieces are unisex. His clothing is not practical, but it is thought provoking. However, Cardin did pave the way for our modern day athleisure aesthetic. Cardin crafted the foundations for athletic clothing, which was something not seen before his time.

Neptune in the 5th House: Sandy Powell

"Costume design isn’t about fashion. Fashion is fashion. Costume design is characters and costumes, so nothing to do with whether you’re fashionable or not, or understanding fashion.”

imaginative, whimsical, dream-like, eccentric, sensitive

Powell is not a clothing designer, she's a costume designer. She has won 43 oscars for her contributions within the film industry. You’d know her from The Wolf of Wall Street, Shakespear in Love, and Interview with a Vampire, plus much more. What makes Powell such a legend is her understanding of how character and story come into play when developing designs. She is not trying to make statements through her costumes, she is trying to enhance the personality of the characters. The costumes she's crafted are influential upon fashion trends outside of film. We all need a little fantasy within our daily lives.

Pluto in the 5th House: Donatella Versace

“I know fashion is not something that can change the world, but it can change the woman. It can empower the woman. It can make her strong, in herself, and to believe in herself more.”

seductive, dynamic, subversive, spectacular, powerful, daring

It is no coincidence that Donatella Versace became an important figure within the fashion industry after the death of her dear brother, Gianni. Donatella has faced many tragedies within her life. Within her own fashion philosophy, Donatalla tries to combat insecurity through clothing. There is no way a woman will ever appear timid when wearing Versace, and that's exactly what Donatella wants. Being a shy woman herself, Donatella is able to transform herself through the clothing that she wears. She understands the power of fashion, and wants to remind every woman that something truly fabulous resides within them.

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enkvyu · 2 years ago

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two-faced — jjk smau

in which gojo pisses off a famous streamer (you 🫵) for funsies and unleashes a legion of loyal fans who want him dragged, doxxed, or dead. fortunately for him, you have your own secrets that you’ll take to the grave, perfect for him to take advantage of. when the two of you meet, an unlikely love story for the ages blossoms aka a lighthearted smau abt gojo n the gang!!

pairings: gojo x f!reader

genres: social media au (smau), crack, fluff, strangers to enemies (?) to lovers

warnings: profanities, dark humour, sexual jokes, mentions of death and suicide, very stupid jokes don’t take anything too seriously!! ignore timestamps. will contain jokes / references from the manga !! you will be warned of spoilers on the posts that have them 🤍

this is my first smau so if it’s not funny i Apologise 😨 just for the shits n giggles !! upload schedule will probably be based on how well this is received 🤍 note all characters are in uni (ages 18-20)

unread notifications !

profiles one | profiles two

01: hit tweet this, hit tweet that, why don’t you hit the gym?

02: hot girls pay the government 2 b a citizen

03: nanami’s right titty tingle

04: What Ever Major Loser

05: let him in, LET HIM IN

06: it’s “save the turtles” until i drink boba with my hands

07: silence of the lambs

08: god giving me my greatest obstacle and it’s a man

09: would u still love me if i was a chip floating around in ur stomach?

10: deny that instead

11: twitching eyes and clenched fists

12: getou’s bang grease

13: spring loaded penis bomb

14: first date options and gojo picks spit boba (it works?!)

15: lactose intolerance, biggest killer since cancer

16: unknown mysterious reason unravelled

17: i wish i could have at least (1)

18: beautiful princess disorder

19: GOGOGOJO GONE !

20: tba

pinned accounts !

@whats-humanity-lol @vduxx @saltypuffin1040 @porridgesblog @justpuddinglol @sleezzsister @fadingpalacebonkpsychic @iluv-ace @realestalphamegathugd4ddy @invisible-mori @mimiqz @hyuckworld @wheredidmycrowngo @ericupid @satorukissr @rumi-rants @milza12 @nymphsdomain @thunderimpulse @waengyknow @err1vki3 @nerdiel-has-no-braincells @whatamidoing89 @aboveasphodel @doughnuts-eater @archer-fb @giannitaa @leathernourishingshoepolish @poisonnuggies @cotton-eee @postmancat @yoontaedotin @crushed-satellite-stars @polartrident @starsfilm @etsukis @bladeismine @the-fab-killjoy @a3th3rrr @alatuskaleidos @emii4evr @trcomedump @usermins @ancientimes @aelynaneedsalottathing @jaynawayna @milceslv @lvryeager @sukisprettyface @kissezfornamjoon @satoryaa

couldn’t tag account (make sure your settings allow u to be tagged!)

( being added to the taglist means you will be tagged at every new release ! ask 2 be added / removed 🤍 )

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world-of-wales · 3 months ago

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❥ 28 OCTOBER 2024 || The Princess of Wales wrote a letter to the Bollywood star Manisha Koirala, expressing her joy at learning that Manisha is cancer-free after her cancer diagnosis and has been able to continue her professional and charitable work.

Manisha was diagnosed with stage IV ovarian cancer in 2012 and underwent treatment at the Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York. She successfully recovered in 2013 following surgery and chemotherapy.

“I wanted to reach out to HRH The Princess of Wales to send my good wishes, particularly due to my own experiences. I am deeply heartened to receive such a warm response from her and wish her the very best of health” - Manisha

#this put such a big smile on my face #princess of wales #the princess of wales #princess catherine #british royal family #british royals #royalty #brf #royals #royal #british royalty #kate middleton #catherine middleton #duchess of cambridge #about catherine #letters #28102024 #manisha koirala #ManishaKoirala24

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halles-notebook · 9 months ago

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stress smokes

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pairing: mattheo riddle x fem!reader

summary: the rule-following perfect student snaps and resorts to a late night smoke session with the infamous mattheo riddle.

warnings: marijuana, stress, slight angst, and that’s it?? super fluffy ౨ৎ⋆ ˚｡⋆

a/n: this is my first time writing on this…. apologies if it’s bootyhole😞

the library was nearly empty, most students chatting in their common room with their friends. exams were still a moderate distance away, not near enough for the tables to be full of stressing teenagers.

you were one of the few there, tucked in the corner everyone knew was yours, hidden behind two bookshelves full of dust. the words had started blurring on the pages nearly an hour ago and your frustration nearing the point of a mental breakdown.

you re-read every sentence multiple times, yet your brain seemed as though it just couldn’t retain the information. angry tears swelled in your eyes and you slammed the book shut before any could drip onto the parchment pages.

this was bound to happen at some point. one person could only take so many books about lacewing flies and ashwinder eggs before they snapped. for the first time since you arrived at hogwarts 6 years ago, you were giving up.

your favorite professors always warned you to take care of yourself before you burnt out, yet you never listened. now you were screwed. aggressively shoving your belongings into your bag, you decided that you were going to be have fun tonight.

you were going to get your mind off of textbooks and study sessions, and do something you’d never done before. despite your irritation, you still gave madam pince a small smile and wave before exiting.

the moon was already high in the sky, stars appearing by its side, but you knew where he would be. you’d ran into him at this time on many occasions. with your bag clutched over your shoulder and a determined mind, you made your way up to the astronomy tower.

just as you expected, he was there. mattheo had a small joint dangling from his fingers, the end lit with small sparks of fire. you sat down next to him silently, and he lazily turned his head to look at you.

“hey princess, care to join?” you rolled your eyes at the pet name, snatching the roll out of his hands and inhaling swiftly. his eyes widened as he tried to steal it back from you. “what the hell?” he asked, finally pulling it from your grasp.

you exhaled the smoke into the air, coughing up a lung as you did. he watched you with an annoyed expression, waiting impatiently until you were done wheezing. once the coughs subsided, he flicked you. “ow! what’s your problem?”

he shrugged carelessly, “just making sure you’re real and not some weird hallucination.” you scoffed and turned your head to look back at the sky. he flicked you again, “okay, seriously? what the hell? what happened to ‘smoking is bad for you. your gonna get lung cancer and die.’” he mocked, raising his pitch to imitate a girly voice.

“stop flicking me!” you exclaimed, rubbing the skin of your arm tenderly. you tried to grab the joint again, but he pulled it back and raised his eyebrows in a way that communicated ‘you’re not getting anything until you explain whats going on.’

you sighed, rubbing your temples tiredly. he watched you the whole time, his confusion morphing to slight worry. “i just want to have fun. i want to stop thinking about stupid studying for one minute and be relaxed. i want to have a night where i think im worth more than academic success, so can you just help me out here?”

he stared at you with an unreadable expression, making you fidget the longer his gaze was on you. finally, he puffed out a breath of air, hesitatingly passing it to you. “thank you.” you muttered quietly, raising it to your lips. he stopped you before it met your mouth.

“don’t inhale a lot. you’ll start coughing again.” you glanced at him, nodding before following his instructions. true to his word, it worked, and you passed it back to him. you two sat in silence for a while, taking turns before it was gone.

the effects soon started to hit, making you let out a tiny laugh at the weird sensation. he looked at you with raised eyebrows, amused, as your tiny laugh developed into a full blown giggle attack. “if i didn’t know you’d never smoked before, i would now.” he murmured to himself. you chose to ignore that.

you soon stopped laughing, opting to stare at the moon instead. it was quiet once more, until you spoke up, almost too low for mattheo to catch. “thank you.” he nodded, and you turned to look at him.

“no, i mean thank you.” he tilted his head a little, bemused. “sometimes i feel like your the only person who doesn’t look at me like a walking cheat sheet. i like that. you’re real, you don’t just talk to me when you want something.” you grinned, not realizing the true depth of your own words.

he was quiet for a couple a long moment, his heart pounding faster in his chest for the oblivious girl next to him. “your a lot more amazing than people give you credit for.” your cheeks heated, and you looked to your knees timidly.

you and mattheo both had a feeling that you’d be seeing a lot more of eachother.

#mattheo riddle #mattheo x you #harry potter #slytherin boys #oneshot #blurb #mattheo riddle blurb #fanfic #fluff #light angst

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aryxchse · 10 months ago

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can i request relationship hcs w jason pls? ur writing for him is so cute

jason grace dating headcanons

a / n ; ur so sweet wtf?? i love u, keep complimenting me n my ass will be floating soon girlie 🫶🏻🫶🏻

warnings ; cursing and i said sexy like once, also female reader AGAIN

- alright here's my favorite gentleman

- scary dog privilege fr

- he's cold to everyone but you

- everytime you hug him he'll spin you around in the air with him

- cloud dates

- he's your personal fridge in the hot weathers

- likes carrying you in his arms

- and like he does it so often

- will tie your shoes for you

- and will help you with your homeworks

- if you guys go different collages, he'll drop you off first

- carries your stuff for you

- do ya'll know that one korean boy who has the biggest heart eyes? yeah he's jason

- since he knows what a sith lord is even though he lost his memory, he'll watch star wars with you

- and recreates the romantic anakin scenes

- "from the moment i met you-" boy stfu i'll literally fall in love

- please teach him how to have fun, he's a very sarcastic guy inside

- will cry if you buy him lightsaber

- if you're a booktok girlie like i am, he'll be happy to buy you your books

- and traumatised after reading the first page

- also yeah, he's paying everything

- likes buying you sexy clothes to see you wearing them

- he's like a little kid in love actually

- he thinks he should give all the pleasure to you but when you returned the favor and like- idk listened to him ramble about something with lovey eyes he almost cried

- girl you make him cry sm fr

- cancer men ppl

- anyways

- he'll buy you matching rings, clothes, anything. he loves matching with you

- will make your hot chocolate a little bit colder for you be able to drink it with his wind

- carries an hair tie for you

- always holding you, ALWAYS

- a hand on your waist? check, on your shoulder? check, backpocket? double check

- mr grace the acts of service guy

- will hold your hand if you're going upstairs like a princess

- he usually sleeps better if he's laying on your chest

- he has one of your plushies with him and spreys your perfume on it regulerly

- it helps him when you're out on a quest okay??

- will watch you do your makeup with doe eyes

- he learned how to braid hairs from piper just to braid yours, bcs he loves playing with your hair

- likes holding your hand

- but not like intertwined, maybe holding your pinky or your fingers lazly, he just needs to feel you

- colarbone 👏🏻 kisses 👏🏻

- he'll just bow you like you guys doing a tango and boom, kisses your colarbone

- buys you flowers and keeps one of them with him to know when he should buy you new ones

- writes you poetry

- he maybe can't say it out loud too much, but he can write it down or show it through actions

- he's actually very talkative and funny around you, leo was mesmerised when he first saw jason all chatty like that

- blushed the first time you wiped his glasses for him

- let's you style him however you want

- and like, pick his glasses for him

- he always pairs up with you in practices

- fucks the rules and makes you sit with him on the zeus table

- he can't just stay away from you too long and he's kind of obsessed atp

- but we love him for that ladies

#i ran out of ideas #hope u like it darlin!#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the heroes of olympus #percy jackson series #pjo hoo toa #percy jackson imagine #jason grace x y/n #jason grace x you #jason grace headcanon #jason grace imagine #jason grace pjo #jason grace

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thepastisalreadywritten · 10 months ago

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Inside William’s Next Act: Tatler’s May issue goes behind the scenes as the Prince of Wales is rising above the noise — and playing the long game

The burden of leadership is falling upon Prince William, but as former BBC Royal Correspondent, Wesley Kerr OBE, explains in Tatler’s May cover story, the future king is taking charge

By Wesley Kerr OBE

21 March 2024

When I first met Prince William in 2009, he asked me if I could tell him how he could win the National Lottery.

It was a jokey quip from someone who has since become the Prince of Wales, the holder of three dukedoms, three earldoms, two baronies and two knighthoods, and heir to the most prestigious throne on earth.

He was, of course, being relatable; I was representing the organisation that had allocated Lottery funding towards the Whitechapel Gallery and he wanted to put me at ease.

William is grand but different, royal but real.

At 6ft 3in, he has the bearing and looks great in uniform after a distinguished, gallant military career.

He will be one of the tallest of Britain’s kings since Edward Longshanks in the 14th century and should one day be crowned sitting above the Stone of Scone that Edward ‘borrowed.’

William, by contrast, has a deep affinity with Scotland and Wales, having lived in both nations and gained solace from the Scottish landscape after his mother died.

He’s popular in America and understands that the Crown’s relationship to the Commonwealth must evolve.

The Prince of Wales has long believed that ‘the Royal Family has to modernise and develop as it goes along, and it has to stay relevant’, as he once said in an interview.

He seeks his own way of being relatable, of benefitting everybody, in the context of an ancient institution undergoing significant challenge and upheaval, as the head of a nation divided by hard times, conflicts abroad, and social and political uncertainty.

We might recognise Shakespeare’s powerful line spoken by Claudius in Hamlet: ‘When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but in battalions.’

With the triple announcement in January and February of the Princess of Wales’s abdominal surgery and long convalescence, of King Charles’s prostate procedure and then of his cancer diagnosis, the burden of leadership has fallen on 76-year-old Queen Camilla and, crucially, on William.

The Prince of Wales’s time has come to step up; and so he has deftly done.

In recent months, we have seen a fully-fledged deputy head of state putting into practice his long-held ideas, speaking out on the most contentious issue of the day and taking direct action on homelessness.

Last June, he unveiled the multi-agency Homewards initiative with the huge aspiration of ending homelessness, backed with £3 million from his Foundation to spearhead action across the UK.

He is consolidating Heads Together, the long-standing campaign on mental health, and fundraises for charities like London’s Air Ambulance Charity.

He was, of course, once a pilot for the East Anglian Air Ambulance services – a profession that had its downside: seeing people in extremis or at death’s door, he found himself ‘taking home people’s trauma, people’s sadness.’

Tom Cruise was a guest at the recent London’s Air Ambulance Charity fundraiser, William’s first gala event after Kate’s operation.

And more stardust followed when William showed that, even without his wife by his side, he could outclass any movie star at the Baftas.

There’s also his immense aim of helping to ‘repair the planet’ itself with his Earthshot Prize: five annual awards of £1 million for transformative environmental projects with worldwide application.

This project has a laser focus on biodiversity, better air quality, cleaner seas, reducing waste and combating climate change. Similar aims to his father; different means to achieve the goal.

On the issue which has caused huge convulsions – the Middle East conflict – William’s 20 February statement from Kensington Palace grabbed attention.

He said he was ‘deeply concerned about the terrible human cost of the conflict since the Hamas terrorist attack on 7 October. Too many have been killed.’

There were criticisms – along the lines of ‘the late Queen would have never spoken out like this’ or ‘what right does he have to meddle in politics?’ – but it was hard to disagree with his carefully calibrated words.

His call for peace, the ‘desperate need’ for humanitarian aid, the return of the hostages.

The statement was approved by His Majesty’s Government, likely cleared with the King himself at Sandringham the previous weekend and also backed by the chief rabbi of Great Britain, Sir Ephraim Mirvis.

Indeed, William and Catherine had immediately spoken out on the horrors of 7 October.

William followed up the week after his Kensington Palace statement by visiting a synagogue and sending a ‘powerful message’, according to the chief rabbi, by meeting a Holocaust survivor and condemning anti-Semitism.

This is rooted in deep personal conviction following William’s 2018 visit to Israel and the West Bank, says Valentine Low, the distinguished author of Courtiers and The Times’s royal correspondent of 15 years, who was on that 2018 trip.

‘William was so moved by his visit to Israel and the West Bank, he found it very affecting, and he was not going to drop this issue – he was going to pay attention to it for the rest of his life,’ says Low.

‘He must feel that… not to say something on the most important issue in the world [at that moment] would be a bit odd if you feel so strongly about it.’

There was concern from some commentators about politicising the monarchy, but this rose above the particulars of party politics.

As Prince of Wales, like his father before him, there is perhaps space to speak out sparingly on carefully chosen issues.

On this occasion, his views were in line with majority public opinion.

On homelessness, news came that same week that William was planning to build 24 homes for the homeless on his Duchy of Cornwall estate.

‘William’s impact is very personal,’ says Mick Clarke, chief executive of The Passage, a charity providing emergency accommodation for London’s homeless.

‘Two weeks before Christmas, the prince came to our Resource Centre in Victoria for a Christmas lunch for 150 people.

He was scheduled to stay for an hour, to help serve, wash up, and talk to people.

He ended up staying for two and a quarter hours, during which time he went from table to table and spoke to every single person.’

Clarke continues:

‘William has an ability to listen, talk and to put people at ease. During the November 2020 lockdown, he came on three separate occasions to help.

It gave the team a boost that he took the time; it was his way of saying: “I support you; you’re doing a great job.”’

Seyi Obakin, chief executive of Centrepoint, one of the prince’s best-known causes, adds:

‘People associate his patronage with the big moments like the time he and I slept under Blackfriars Bridge.

The things that stick with me are smaller in scale and the more profound for it – in quieter moments, away from the cameras, where he has volunteered his time.’

It is a different approach from the King’s.

As Prince of Wales, he was involved in the minutiae of dozens of issues at any one time, working into the night to follow up on emails, crafting his speeches, writing or dictating notes.

Add to that much nationwide touring over 40 years (after he left active military service in 1976), fitting in multiple engagements, often being greeted formally by lord lieutenants.

This is not William’s style. He has commended his father’s model, but he does things his own way.

Although patronages are under review, William has up till now far fewer than either his father or his grandparents.

Charles is sympathetic to William’s approach and his desire to make time with his young family sacrosanct.

They are confidantes, attested by the night of Queen Elizabeth’s death.

They were both at Birkhall with Camilla, reviewing funeral arrangements while the rest of the grieving family were nearby at Balmoral, hosted by the Princess Royal.

Charles has had almost six decades in public life and is the senior statesman of our time, with even longer in the spotlight than Joe Biden.

After Eton and St Andrew’s University, where he met Catherine, William served in three branches of the military between 2006 and 2013, finishing as a seasoned and skilled helicopter rescue pilot.

His later employment as an air ambulance pilot stopped in 2017, when he became a full-time working royal.

At that time, not so long ago – with Harry unmarried, Andrew undisgraced, and Philip and Elizabeth still active – William shared the spotlight.

Now, after the King, he’s the key man.

He can look back on the success of his first big campaign initially launched with his wife and brother in 2016: Heads Together.

‘We are delighted that Prince William should have become such a positive and sympathetic advocate for mental health through his Heads Together initiative and now well-established text service, Shout, among other projects,’ says the longtime CEO and founder of Sane, the remarkable Marjorie Wallace CBE.

‘It is not always known that he follows in the footsteps of his father, the King, whose inspiration and vision were vital in the creation of our mental health charity Sane.

As founding patron, he was instrumental in establishing our 365-days-a-year helpline and was a remarkable and selfless support to me in setting up the Prince of Wales International Centre for Sane Research.’

'Indeed,' says Wallace, 'this is where Prince William echoes the work of his father, showing the same ‘understanding and compassion for people struggling through dark and difficult times of their lives and has done much to raise awareness and encourage those affected to speak out and seek help.

We owe a huge debt to His Majesty and the Prince of Wales for their involvement in this still-neglected area.’

Just as I saw all those years ago at that early solo engagement in Whitechapel, William still approaches his public duties with humour and fun.

‘He defuses the formality with jocularity,’ says Valentine Low, citing two public events in 2023 that he witnessed.

In April last year, while on a visit to Birmingham, William randomly answered the phone in an Indian restaurant he was being shown around and took a table booking from a customer – an endearing act of spontaneity.

On his arrival later that day, the unsuspecting diner was surprised to be told exactly whom he had been talking to.

In October, Low reported, William ‘unleashed his inner flirt as he hugged his way through a visit with Caribbean elders [in Cardiff] to mark Black History Month.

As he gave one woman a hug – for longer than she expected – he joked: “I draw the line at kissing.”

And while posing for a group photograph, he prompted gales of laughter when he quipped: “Who is pinching my bottom?”’

Low believes that when William eventually becomes king, he will be more ‘radical’ than his father but wonders if people will respond to ‘call me William’ when ‘the whole point of the Royal Family is mystique and being different.’

However, William has thought deeply about his current role and is prepared for whatever his future holds.

For now, there is a decision to be made on Prince George’s secondary schooling. It’s said that five public schools are being considered, all fee-paying.

Eton is single-sex and boarding but close to home. Marlborough (Catherine’s alma mater) is co-ed and full boarding. And Oundle, St Edward’s Oxford and Bradfield College (close to Kate’s parents) are co-ed with a mix of boarding and day.

As parents, William and Catherine aspire to raise their children ‘as good people with the idea of service and duty to others as very important’, William said in an interview with the BBC in 2016.

‘Within our family unit, we are a normal family.’ Which may be one reason why he is so resistant to their privacy being compromised either by the media or close family members.

The 19th-century author Walter Bagehot wrote:

‘A family on the throne is an interesting idea also. It brings down the pride of sovereignty to the level of petty life… a princely marriage is the brilliant edition of a universal fact, and, as such, it rivets mankind.’

If hereditary monarchy is to survive, it must beguile us but also demonstrate its utility, that it is a force for good.

William said in that 2016 interview, ‘I’m going to get plenty of criticism over my lifetime,’ echoing Queen Elizabeth II’s famous Guildhall speech in 1992 ‘that criticism is good for people and institutions that are part of public life. No institution – city, monarchy, whatever – should expect to be free from the scrutiny of those who give it their loyalty and support, not to mention those who don’t.’

William saw close up his mother’s ability to bring public focus and her own personal magnetism to any subject or cause she focused on.

He admires his father’s work ethic, the way he ‘really digs down,’ sometimes literally (I understand that gardening is giving the King solace during his cancer treatment).

But the biggest influence for William was Her late Majesty, as he said on her 90th birthday.

As an Eton schoolboy, William made weekend visits to the big house on the hill, being mentored by Granny rather as she had been tutored in the Second World War by the then vice-provost of Eton, Sir Henry Marten.

William said in 2016:

‘In the Queen, I have an extraordinary example of somebody who’s done an enormous amount of good and she’s probably the best role model I could have.’

That said, his aim was ‘finding your own path but with very good examples and guidance around you to support you.'

Queen Elizabeth II had a brilliant way of rising above the fray and usually being either a step ahead of public opinion or in tune with it.

If you are at the helm of affairs in a privileged hereditary position, your duty is to serve and use your pulpit for the benefit of others.

In a democracy, monarchy is accountable.

The scrutiny is intense, with an army of commentators paid for wisdom and hot air about each no-show, parsing each announcement, interpreting each image.

William takes the long view. He has ‘wide horizons,’ says Mick Clarke.

‘There are so many causes that are more palatable and easier to achieve than ending homelessness, but his commitment and drive are 100 per cent.’

The prince seeks a different way of being royal in an ancient institution that must move with the times. His task? To develop something modern in an ever-changing world.

He faces all sorts of new issues – or old issues in new guises.

Noises off from within the family don’t help – Andrew’s difficulties, or the suggestions of prejudice from Montecito a couple of years ago (now seemingly withdrawn), which prompted William’s most vehement soundbite: ‘We’re very much not a racist family.’

William is maybe a new kind of leader who can keep the monarchy relevant and resonant in the coming decades.

Queen Elizabeth II is a powerful exemplar and memory, but she was of her time. William is his own man.

He must overcome and think beyond ‘the unforgiving minute.’

Indeed, he could seek inspiration in Rudyard Kipling’s poem, If.

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch[…]

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,

And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

This article was first published in the May 2024 issue, on sale Thursday, 28 March.

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thoughtspresso · 2 years ago

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Oshi No Ko was about Arima Kana all along.

And I think there’s a real possibility she may die at the end.

Or be placed in the way of grave danger.

I was reading some AquKane shippers say something about how they don’t understand AquaKana, and why the writers and directors keep clearly pushing Kana towards Aqua when they barely share any chemistry. Whereas, in their belief, his relationship with Akane is more honest, deeper, whatever. I’m not here to argue about that. But I get where they’re coming from. And the simple explanation is this:

It’s because this whole story was written for Arima Kana.

I’ve seen some Youtubers talk about how this whole story was meant to be fulfillment for Ruby/Sarina’s dream to become the next great Idol, something about Amaterasu favoring her.

And that’s near what I thought of it. But I really think if the God of Entertainment wanted to bless a child with cancer a second life as the world’s great idol, they’d also give her a great singing voice, y’know?

Spoilers for the manga, of course as we go along on this explanation. So anime onlies, get caught up before you start reading me ramble.

Here we go:

1. Arima Kana is the embodiment of Amaterasu, not Ruby.

Or at least, Amaterasu’s appointed representative, or her favorite daughter.

To give you a run-down of some of the core Shinto/Japanese Mythology that is important for the story, the Creator God Izanaki had three children:

Amaterasu, Goddess of the Sun.

Tsukuyomi, the Moon.

Susanoo, the Storm.

The story goes that Amaterasu and Susanoo had a competition about who could create better gods. So Amaterasu took Susanoo’s Totsuka-no-Tsurugi* (longsword) and split it into three, from which she birthed the three Munakata goddesses.

And woncha knowit, there are three great actresses born in that year?

*A reminder that Kana plays the character Tsurugi, which literally just means Sword. And Akane’s character Saya-hime just literally means Sheath or Scabbard Princess.

In this bet, Amaterasu got clever with the rules and won on a technicality. Susanoo went on a rampage, destroyed Amaterasu’s ricefield, and flayed Amaterasu’s favorite divine horse*, and then threw its body at her loom.

*The name Arima is spelled with the Kanji of Horse & Exist/Live.

Amaterasu, in her grief, flees into a cave, believed to be Amano Iwato cave, right in the town of Takachiho, Amamiya Gorou’s hometown, and the death place of Tendouji Sarina.

The being that draws Amaterasu out of there was the Goddess of the Dawn, known also as the Goddess of the Revelry & Arts, a being that Aqua says he knows well, and believes there’s a grain of truth to:

And how does Ame-no-Uzume draw Amaterasu out of her grief?

By throwing an absolute rager, and dancing really wildly that it catches her attention and makes all the gods around them laugh so hard. Just like:

Ame-no-Uzume will later on marry a diety who tried to block her passage before, Sarutohiko, who in Ise is worshipped as the god who illuminates the world.

That’s some divinity-level AquaKana shipping right there.

Just like how Aka Akasaka wrote the story of Kaguya-sama: Love Is War about two lovers who couldn’t be together just like in the myth of Kaguya, but having his characters overcome all odds to defy divine fate, I do believe that apart from the parallels to the mythology like he did in Kaguya-sama, there is very literal divine intervention this time in Oshi No Ko.

I think what’s happening is that the gods, particularly Amaterasu and Susanoo are quarelling again about who could create better gods, just like before, but now more of whose favored child will shine the brightest and be worshipped by the most humans. But just like last time, Susanoo may have been enraged, especially at the sexual assault of his chosen Hikaru Kamiki, that he possessed him with a corrupting force that urges him to destroy shining stars before they reach their peak, hence the murders of Himekawa Airi, Hoshino Ai**, and Katayose Yura.

Which by the way, the name Hikaru means Radiant Light!

And Hoshino means Field of Stars!

Whether it’s because Amaterasu is angry that every daughter she sends to earth is slaughtered by Susanoo’s chosen, or just because she wants to win their competition, she appoints Ame-no-Uzume to assist in safeguarding her new favored one from Kamiki’s clutches. Her new favored one being Arima Kana.

And therefore, Ame-no-Uzume takes the souls of two motherless humans who had passed before they could shine and sent them to become Hoshino Ai’s twin children. It was all anyway happening in her territory of Takachiho at the most opportune time.

Ame-no-Uzume is also known as The Goddess of Dance, as well as The Great Pursuader. And wouldn’t you know, that’s exactly the gifts that the Hoshino Twins received.

An energetic performer who takes the stage with dance:

And a deceptive, persuasive, extremely believable actor, who:

fooled his own sister into believing she had been rejected from an audition

pretended to scout an idol from a competing agency to research them

get Director Gotanda to raise him and train him

make Akane not just date him, but follow him down a destructive path

convince Kana and Mem to join IchigoPro

impersonate Pieyon for several days straight

Anyway, I truly, truly believe that unbeknownst to Aqua, his true mission is just to keep drawing Kana out of her darkness until she shines the brightest. Which is what he keeps doing anyway:

2. The Timing of the whole Oshi No Ko plot is aligned with Arima Kana’s rise to unprecedented stardom.

The story of Ai Hoshino’s pregnancy and meeting of Gorou Amamiya in a quaint hospital occurs at the beginning of Arima Kana’s life, just after she is born.

She meets Aqua Hoshino around age 4, already talented, and already extremely arrogant which could have easily been the demise of her career. But meeting Aqua and seeing his acting was a necessary wake-up call for her, that it brings her to tears. She never forgets this experience that she brought that lesson with her to her adulthood: that she can’t be satisfied and keep working harder, and to be a better communicator with her colleagues. At their first point of contact, Aqua already becomes the reason why Arima Kana’s acting career survives the slump.

They meet again in high school, when Arima Kana has one acting job in a lackluster production of Sweet Today. The ratings had plummeted, if not for the fact that Aqua came onto the set to draw out the best acting Arima Kana could deliver. After this, Arima receives much more respect and recognition from her colleagues in the industry beyond just being cast to bring some legitimacy to their production.

It’s because of Aqua and Ruby that Kana joins IchigoPro’s Idol Division, and her career is reborn anew. Such that, even after quitting B-Komachi, Arima states she never regretted the decision to join, because otherwise the career of Arima Kana would have been already over.

It’s because of Aqua’s presence that Arima trains to become better and better as an idol. Aqua kept drawing out the light from Kana’s eyes, to the point that it catches the attention of the crowd who previously had no interest in her.

It’s because of her experience as an idol that she regains the confidence and sense of greed necessary to grab the attention of the audience when on stage, such that even Akane recognizes this change in her when Arima takes the stage as Tsurugi for the 2.5 Adadptation of Tokyo Blade.

And it’s because of all of these that she captures the attention of award-winning Director Masanori Shima, who lines up some roles for her when her acting schedule had dried up. It’s once again because of Kana’s dedication towards Aqua that Shima D finds her so interesting that he was most willing to promise her the best role possible.

It was as if Ame-no-Uzume-no-Mikoto appointed Aqua and Ruby to come draw Arima Kana out of her Cave, and bring the Sun out again, just like how the deity drew out Amaterasu.

If you think about the title of the show, Oshi No Ko, it literally means The Favorite Child. God’s favored child. Arima Kana had been born chosen by Amaterasu from the very beginning. And Ame-no-Uzume is sending Aqua and Ruby to aid on this quest.

Which explains why it seems like there had been a mission communicated to Aqua from the very beginning. And why Ai was never going to be reincarnated at all.

You would think that if The Crow Girl, which we assume is the divine guide Yatagarasu, was communicating with Aqua about his revenge plan or helping him find Kamiki, that Aqua would hold a more favorable relationship with The Crow whenever it appears to give advice, no?

But it’s exactly the opposite. Because The Crow is guiding him into something that is different from his personal goal that Aqua doesn’t understand.

And this is where I think Arima Kana could be put in danger.

3. Arima Kana is Hikaru Kamiki’s next target.

There were earlier theories that thought Kurokawa Akane was the one to die next, because of what people have now learned of Kamiki’s serial murderer profile targeting big celebrities before their peak, and because Akane had received a bouquet of white roses from him when she won an award.

The chapter when it was expected to happen was a fake-out from Aka Akasaka, and some people think it’s still possible that she’s the target. In fact, I keep seeing recent theory videos who discount Kana and say she’s “the safest”. Hah! If only!

The scenes with Shima D weren’t just a mere plot point to bring scandal to Arima’s name, and threaten her career and life enough that it pushes Aqua to reveal his mother’s secret in exchange. But it’s there because this is the upward path for Arima Kana. So far, the only people who have witnessed her dazzling star power have been fans of the Sweet Today manga, idol otakus, and people who attended Tokyo Blade. That’s not really masterpiece-of-the-century, performing-at-the-dome level. None of these gigs have placed her center stage in what could be Film of the Year, and a Best Actress spot. Now, the chance is here, and it’s real:

I think, The 15-Year-Lie will attempt to draw out Hikaru Kamiki, or that Aqua intends to reveal himself in the movie looking like him, and reveal the identity of his father.

But I also think what would happen is that they would be unsuccessful at taking him down completely. Instead, from the movie, he would be interested in Arima Kana, and target her through the course of her Shima D movie, and plan to kill her before an important awards night.

Alternatively, now that Kana is changing her focus to film, she may consider moving agencies, and ask Frill Shiranui about her agent. And if we’re right, she is likely represented by Kamiki Productions.

Either way, Kamiki will pay attention to her and try to kill her just before she reaches her highest.

But I don’t think Arima Kana will die. I think instead of being saved by Aqua, it’ll be Kana who takes Kamiki down. Echoing back to her getting mad at Aqua for thinking that avoiding her was protecting her, and Aqua believing that Kana doesn’t need help since she’s strong enough to take care of herself.

And then maybe, it’s Arima Kana who draws Aqua out of the darkness too.

And, just like with Kaguya and Shirogane Miyuki, Aka Akasaka is once again writing a story about two people who will defy a fate of divine tragedy, and come out of it being more truthful with each other than they’ve been with themselves all along.

#oshi no ko #oshi no ko spoilers #arima kana #aqua hoshino #japanese mythology #shinto #shintoism #aqua x kana #hoshino aquamarine #onk spoilers #aquakana

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rabiosantologia · 1 year ago

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⸻ 𖤓 | VEDIC ASTROLOGY MASTERLIST (Vol. 2)

→ Volume 1

KARAKAS OF PLANETS AND THEIR HOUSES

THE PLANETS AND THEIR EXTENT OF RULERSHIP

THE 4TH HOUSE EXPERIENCE: PART 1 •

THE 8TH HOUSE EXPERIENCE: PART 1 •

THE 9TH HOUSE EXPERIENCE: PART 1 •

NAKSHATRA'S AND BIRDS THROUGH MYTHOLOGY AND INTERPRETATION

AMATYAKARKA AND PROFESSIONS

KEYWORDS • THE ASTROLOGICAL HOUSES: PART 1 || PART 2

✺ ASPECTS OF EACH PLANET

ᘛ RAHU DOMINANT THEMES: PART 1 | PART 2 |

MOON-RAHU-KETU: TRUE VAMPIRISM

KETU DOMINANT

D1 & MOON CHART

KETU PLACEMENT AND YOUR MOST CORE SELF

WHAT NAKSHATRA REPRESENTS YOU!?

JYESTHA NAKSHATRA: INTENSE BEAUTY (PROFILE)

THE PRINCESS DIARIES - COMING INTO YOUR POWER

JYESHTA: THE BATTLE, THE LONELINESS AND THE COST OF VICTORY

THE DARK SIDE OF JYESHTA - ALL AGAINST ONE, ONE FOR THEMSELVES

ASHLESHA: THE VILLAIN ERA NAKSHATRA

THE SPECTRUM OF FEMININITY & CANCER RASHI: A STUDY

★ THE ASTROLOGY OF APPEARANCE: #1 | #2 | #3 | #4 |

| RAHU IS YOUR MATRIX, KETU IS YOUR OUT FROM THAT MATRIX

SHRAVANA NAKSHATRA: CELEBRITY CONSERVATORSHIPS & ABUSE BY THE ONES WHO SHOULD CARE MOST

THE "BOND GIRL" NAKSHATRA

🐯 CHITRA AND VISHAKHA WOMEN: STRIKING ENERGY (TIGRESS BEAUTY)

MAGHA NAKSHATRA: PITRI SECRETS

MAGHA NAKSHATRA OBSERVATIONS

♀ BEAUTY & THE BEAST: THE PATH OF VENUS

DECODING VENUS ⋆ A JOURNEY THROUGH THE NAKSHATRAS: BHARANI, PURVA PHALGUNI, PURVA ASHADA

THE ABSORBENT NATURE OF VENUS: AN ASTROLOGICAL EXPLORATION

THE UGLINESS OF VENUS

★ 🐍 | ASHLESHA OBSERVATIONS

WHY JYESTHA, ASHLESHA, AND REVATI PEOPLE USE SNAKES IN A LOT OF THEIR WORK

• SYMBOL: PURVA BHADRAPADA · SHATABHISHA ·

LEARN SIDEREAL ASPECTS

EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE & SHATABISHA NAKSHATRA

☰ VEDIC ASTROLOGY SYMBOLISM & RECURRING MOTIFS: PART 1 • PART 2 • PART 3 • PART 4 • PART 5 • PART 6 •

SWATI NAKSHATRA: THE SELF-GOING STAR

BEYONCÉ & CHITRA NAKSHATRA

EXPRESSION OF ENERGY: RAHU | KETU

4H PLACEMENTS | 8H PLACEMENTS | 12H PLACEMENTS | ALL ABOUT THE 6H ·

CELEBRITY EXAMPLES OF DIFFERENT PLANETS IN THE ASCENDANT (SIDEREAL ASTROLOGY)

NAKSHATRA CONVERTOR

UNLOCKING THE SECRETS: THE ESOTERIC MIND OF THE MOON

COLORS AND PLANETS

⬤ | ASTROLOGY OBSERVATIONS

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celticcrossanon · 1 day ago

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BRF Reading - 21st of January, 2025

This is speculation only

Cards drawn on the 21st of January, 2025

Question: What are The King's three main areas of focus this year?

Interpretation: Improving Queen Camilla's public image, helping Harry restore his reputation, and healing the reputation of the BRF.

Card One: The Queen of Cups in Reverse

The Queen of Cups is the card for a Cancer Person. Here it is giving me Queen Camilla energy (not Prince William or Princess Diana, the two other Cancers in the BRF). In the reverse, it indicates that the person is either overshadowed or not acting out of their higher character.

The energy from this card tells me that King Charles is unhappy about the current popularity of his second wife. He thinks she is being overshadowed, overlooked, unfairly put down etc. He wants to reverse that trend so she is seen by the general public as he sees her - a kind, loving, compassionate person who is a very supportive and whose presence is healing for him. He wants her to be as loved and adored by the public as Princess Diana was, and I get the feeling that he can't quite understand why people don't see her as a wonderful person. He wants to turn her popularity around so she is beloved by the general public (to put the Queen of Cups card upright).

I asked the tarot for confirmation on this, I asked "Does King Charles want to reverse the unpopularity of Queen Camilla" and the card I got was The Empress, which is a resounding Yes to my question. The Empress is a woman who is beautiful, abundant, warm, generous, loved, nurturing, creative - the archetypal female/wife/mother to The Emperor's male/husband/father archetype. This is how The King wants people to view Queen Camilla, and one of his foci this year is to make that change happen.

Card Two: The Wheel of Fortune in Reverse

This card represents your fortunes taking a downwards turn. It can be your finances, your popularity, your credibility, your respect - any or all areas of your life have taken a turn for the worse. One of the meanings of this card is bad luck, and I get the feeling that The King thinks the downward turn in fortune is due to bad luck, and not e.g. the consequences of past actions.

This card applies to Harry. I asked, and got a No for it applying to the BRF, and I drew The Hermit, the major arcana card for Virgo, when I asked if it applied to Harry, which is a big Yes as Harry is a sun sign Virgo. So, King Charles wants to reverse the downward slide of Prince Harry's fortunes, and that is one of his major foci for the year. The underlying energy when I drew The Hermit card was the Seven of Pentacles, the card of harvest and reward for hard work, which tells me that The King thinks that Harry has been working very hard and it is only bad luck that he hasn't succeeded. He may not want Harry back in the UK, but he certainly seems prepared to lend him a hand to reverse the downward trend in his public image and his finances (from the Seven of Pentacles, Pentacles represent money and status). I would not be surprised if there was some behind the scenes stuff to boost Harry's image and reputation.

This answer actually surprised me, as I was expecting this card to be about the BRF, and instead it turned out to be about Harry.

Card Three: The Star in Reverse

The Star is a card of hope, healing, having your dreams come true. It can also literally mean being the star of the show. In the reverse, this is not happening - no healing is taking place, their is a lack of faith in the person or institution, people feel hopeless or despondent.

The energy of this card is of healing. The King wants to turn things around and heal the damage done to someone's or something's reputation. I asked if this card was about the BRF and The Hierophant flew out of the deck as I was shuffling, which is again a big Yes as The Hierophant is the card for institutions and for the BRF as an institution, The King wants to heal the BRF, he wants to restore people's faith in the monarchy, he wants the BRF to once again represent a stable institution which is both reliable and a beacon of hope in troubled times. I'm not sure how he is going to do this, but it is his third main area of focus for the immediate future,

I'm not sure if The King sees the BRF as an institution as separate from himself as King or not, so it may be that he plans to restore faith in the BRF by boosting faith in himself, i.e. increasing his popularity or presenting himself as the healer of X divisions by doing Y - which is a fair enough strategy, as he is the monarch and the BRF is judged by the perception of its monarch by a lot of people.

Underlying Energy: The Ace of Cups

Aces a new beginnings or new opportunities. This is a card of new beginnings in the area of relationships. In this reading, it is a card of love - I can feel the energy of love pouring off this card. The King is focusing on these three areas out of a genuine love for the people involved - his wife, his son, and the institution of the BRF - as well as an affection for the people of the UK. He is not trying to create trouble or doing things out of malice - he is focusing on these areas out of love and in the belief that achieving his goals will be the best thing for the monarchy, for his family, and for the UK.

Conclusion:

The King has three main foci for the immediate future - to increase the popularity of his wife so everyone sees her as he sees her, to reverse the downward trend in the fortunes of his hard working (in his eyes) second son, and to restore the BRF to a beloved and respected institution, possibly by making The King (himself) beloved and respected. He has made these choices out of the love he has for his wife and his son and the affection he has for the UK public, and he is hoping to create a new relationship between the UK public and his wife, his second son, and the BRF/himself that will reverse the negative ideas/reputations*trends of the past.

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verspia · 5 months ago

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Can you do a Angst Arda ff story where he has a bestfriend and a girlfriend but he only hangs out with his bestfriend and the reader starts to feel left out.

And it went on for about 2 months and the reader couldn’t hold it anymore because Arda barely spent time with her at her worst days and she leaves him at the end.

But there’s a plot twist.

She wanted to spend time with him because she was diagnosed with cancer but he obviously couldn’t so she left him with a goodbye letter where she confesses her feelings and he eventually feels guilty and regret.

WITH LOVE, • ARDA GÜLER

( pairing ) arda güler x reader

i actually love this request esp the best friend part because, real.

warnings - character death, maybe slight grammatical errors

Everyone had warned you about the girl best friend, that it was a world wide experience to most, if not all, girlfriends where they would be a third wheel in their own relationship.

You had been warned by everybody, a collection of stereotypes thrown at your way and your only way to refute them was, “well, the boyfriend wasn’t arda.”

You were so confident that Arda would never replace you, would never prioritise anyone else above you and at first, this confidence hadn’t been misplaced.

Arda made you feel like you were the moon in a sky full of stars. You were charmed by him, why wouldn’t you be?

Unfortunately you should’ve listened to your friends when they told you about the three month rule and the inevitable consequence of dating a man who had a girl best friend.

You should’ve listened when they said that a guy is only friends with a girl they find attractive.

You should’ve listened to them, when your dates became group hangouts, where your usual passenger princess seat was designated for Arda’s best friend because Arda had picked her up before he’d come to get you.

You should’ve heeded the warnings when you were left there blinking owlishly while Arda laughed himself off to an inside joke shared with another girl. With the best friend. With a girl that wasn’t you. He was laughing. At an inside joke. Something you couldn’t understand.

You had never felt more lonely, knowing that someone else had discovered the secret parts of Arda, your person, when you had only just began to scratch the surface.

You knew what he liked and what he didn’t, but she knew the stories behind his preferences, was there when he made these decisions. And it hurt, it felt like a knife twisting around your gut, because even though you were the one who held Arda’s hand, even though he was always there, he still managed to feel so far apart. Out of reach for you.

At first, it was easy to brush off the unease. They were best friends, after all, and you knew better than to be jealous. Arda was charming in his own right, with that effortless way of making everyone around him feel important. But as time went on, the charm began to wear thin, replaced by a growing ache in your chest that you couldn’t quite name.

It started with the little things, because it was always the little things, wasn’t it?

The way Arda’s eyes lit up when she walked into the room, a brightness in his eyes that you had noticed only rarely when he looked at you, a look that you had to work hard for that she so effortlessly attained.

The way he would talk about her, his best friend, and it was indisputable the way his voice would soften, laced with fondness and warmth that made your heart twist with something bitter.

You tried to ignore it, telling yourself it was nothing, that you were being paranoid, but the doubt lingered, gnawing at the edges of your happiness.

You remember the first time you truly felt like a third wheel. The three of you were out for dinner, and it had scared you, how fast date night had turned into more than just you and Arda alone.

The conversation flowed easily between them, a rhythm you struggled to keep up with. You laughed at their jokes, nodded along to stories you weren’t a part of, but it was like watching a movie you weren’t cast in. Arda made some offhand comment, and her laughter rang out, loud and free, and the pride in Arda’s eyes at eliciting that very reaction made you want to claw out your own. You had tried to join in, but the moment had already passed, leaving you feeling awkward and out of place.

It escalated to the point where you felt like you were watching them from behind a glass wall, there but only barely. You were only an onlooker, watching but never part of the moment.

You began to wonder whether Arda even realised you were there.

It hurt, but you swallowed the pain, telling yourself it was just your imagination. But the cracks in your relationship widened, little fissures that deepened with every glance, every shared moment you weren’t a part of. You tried to bring it up once, tried to tell Arda how you felt, but he brushed it off, laughing softly as he assured you there was nothing to worry about.

“You’re being silly,” he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead and then it was back to her again.

The kiss had meant to be warm, but you only felt a deep bone chilling cold, freezing you in place.

The little kiss on your forehead, a gesture of comfort, had brought more pain to you in that moment than anything else.

The pain had begun to grow so egregious, it had begun to affect you physically, that when you began to cough up blood, you had felt at first that it was only your bleeding heart. It wasn’t long after that when you started to feel the changes in your body. The fatigue that wouldn’t go away, the bruises that appeared without reason, the weight loss you couldn’t explain. You tried to ignore it, chalking it up to stress or exhaustion, but deep down, you knew something was wrong. You could feel it, a quiet dread settling in the pit of your stomach, growing heavier with each passing day.

Arda had been so caught up with her, he never noticed.

Of course a visit to the Doctor, alone, confirmed that you had a diagnosis of terminal cancer, and not just a severely broken heart.

You had sat there, in the cold sterile room, resigned at your fate, the doctor’s words echoing inside your head.

“We found something,” he had said, his voice gentle but firm. The words that followed blurred together, a litany of medical terms and probabilities, but the meaning was clear enough. It was cancer—aggressive, late-stage, the kind that doesn’t leave much room for hope.

You decided that you would keep this to yourself. Finding that telling Arda to be something more difficult than the entire ordeal you had been subjected to.

All you felt was if, when, your presence would disappear from Arda’s life, would he miss you? And then you shook your head, how could he, because you had already disappeared from Arda’s life ages ago.

You came to the realization that though you had still a beating heart, you were a ghost now, haunting the edges of a relationship that no longer felt like yours.

You went home that day, walking through the door as if nothing had changed. Arda greeted you with a smile, asking how your day was, and you answered with a lie that came too easily, your voice had remained steady, betraying nothing. You sat with him on the couch, feeling their warmth beside you, but all you could think about was how much time you had left—how many more moments like this you’d get,

You felt selfish, knowing that you weren’t breaking up with him even if your relationship had come to an end ages ago. You wanted to delude yourself into thinking that Arda, some part of him atleast, still loved you.

And when the pain became too much, when your body started to betray you with weakness and exhaustion, you found excuses. You were tired from work, you said. You weren’t feeling well, maybe just a cold. Arda would look at you with concern, but he believed you—why wouldn’t he? He had no reason to doubt you, no reason to think that something so terrible could be lurking just beneath the surface.

The days blurred into weeks, and the cancer spread, a silent invader you couldn’t stop. You could feel it inside you, gnawing away at your strength, your hope, your future. The pain was constant now, a dull ache that radiated through your bones, but you bore it in silence, hiding the worst of it behind closed doors. You were familiar with heartache, what was a little more agony?

But Arda was perspective, at least somewhat. He noticed how you’d down a pill after every meal, the pallor of your skin, and your ghostly complexion. He noticed the bags under your eyes, and how frail you’d gotten, but it was too late.

You felt the day arrive, the day you knew that your life had reached its end, and it had took all your energy to muster up the strength to write everything you had wanted to say into a letter.

Dear Arda,

I don’t know how to begin this letter, and even if I did, I’m not sure it would be enough to say all that I need to say. But I’m running out of time, and I need you to hear this, even if it’s only in the words I leave behind. By the time you read this letter, you’ll know why I’ve written it.

First, I want you to know I’ve always admired you, Arda. From the moment we met, I knew there was something special about you—something warm and bright that drew people in, like a lighthouse in the dark. I’ve watched you bring so much joy to those around you, and it hurt me incredibly when I realised that I never did the same for you, rather it was your best friend, but now that I’m going, i’m happy that you have someone who makes you just as happy as you do with everyone else.

I have told you this, but i’ll say it again,I love you, Arda. Even though loving you hurt me more than anything, i’m grateful to have met you, and I wish nothing but the best for you, I wish you happiness for eternity.

I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. I’m sorry for keeping you in the dark about what was happening to me, but I couldn’t bear the thought of you looking at me with pity, of you worrying about me when you already had so much on your shoulders. I didn’t want you to see me like this, broken and scared, knowing there was nothing you could do to stop it. You were always so strong, so solid, and I couldn’t bear to take that away from you.

By the time you read this, I’ll be gone, Cancer does that. I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye in person, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold it together if I did. I wanted you to remember me as I was, not as I am now. I wanted you to keep that image of me in your mind, whole and happy, instead of the person I’ve become.

Anyway, I’m asking you to live your life, Arda. Don’t let my passing weigh on you. Don’t let it stop you from being the person you’re meant to be. I want you to be happy. I want you to find joy, even if it takes time. You deserve that. You deserve everything good in this world.

I loved you, Arda. I still do. And I’ll carry that love with me, wherever I’m going. Please don’t cry for me. Just remember me, and remember that I wanted you to live, really live, even after I’m gone.

With love,

You signed the letter and then, finally, you allowed yourself to cry.

Sobs wracked through your body, all the pain that you felt flowing out like a waterfall and that’s how you left, tear stained cheeks and curled up in bed.

It was pitiful, but it had been how you felt, Helpless.

When Arda came home that evening, he found the apartment eerily quiet. The air felt thick, heavy with something he couldn’t quite place. He called your name, but there was no answer. He knew you had been feeling off lately, more tired, more distant, but he never expected this. His heart pounded in his chest as he made his way through the apartment, a creeping dread settling in his stomach.

And then he saw you.

You were lying on the bed, your body still, too still. He rushed to your side, his breath catching in his throat as he called your name again, louder this time, but still no response. His hands shook as he reached out to touch you, his fingers trembling against your cold skin.

“Please,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “Please, wake up…”

But you were gone.

The realization hit him like a freight train, knocking the breath from his lungs. He collapsed beside you, his hands clutching at you desperately, as if he could somehow pull you back from the brink. Tears streamed down his face, hot and unrelenting, as the full weight of your loss crashed over him.

He found the letter on the nightstand beside the bed, your handwriting scrawled across the paper, shaky but familiar. With trembling hands, he unfolded it, his eyes scanning the words you had left behind for him. As he read, his tears fell harder, soaking the paper, smudging the ink.

The letter was like a knife to the heart. Every word was a reminder of how much you had suffered in silence, of how you had loved him, even as you were slipping away. He could barely breathe as he read your confession, and when he reached the end of the letter, regret consumed his being, enveloping and guilt drowned him.

He cried, his sobs wracking his body as he clutched the letter to his chest. He cried for you, for the time you didn’t have, for the things he never said. He cried for the feelings he hadn’t realized you felt, for the guilt that now gnawed at him, knowing you had kept this burden from him, from everyone. He cried because he couldn’t save you, because you were gone, and there was nothing he could do to bring you back.

But he cried most for his blindness, how couldn’t he have noticed how you had felt, how had he let you feel so unloved, so ignored.

Self loathing plagued him as he sat there, pondering whether he could have saved your life, only if he hadn’t been so stupid.

He wished for time to turn back, he wished to change the way he had treated you, but it was too late.

fin.

#fanfic #football #real madrid #turkiye #arda güler #arda güler x reader #arda guler #football wags #angst #character death #sad poem #love #romantic #turkish #heartbreak

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gatheringbones · 1 year ago

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[“Terry’s hair was long & thick, bleached blond, perhaps because she wanted to be a princess in a fairy tale instead of real. We wrote letters to one another, passionately declaring our eternal love, which the technicians stole. One night when she was sitting on my bed in the dorm after lights out, as I brushed her hair, they threw on the lights in a frenzy of disgust & separated us for being lesbians. We were too drugged and too frightened to do more than hold hands. The head nurse was a lesbian, who called Terry’s mother, who came the next day to take her home to her psychiatrist father, to whom she had not spoken in over four years. I was sent to the old women’s ward for punishment, where my job was to feed the bed-bound ladies, some of them in restraints all the time. The stench of urine & untreated cancer was overwhelming. I wrote long, intense letters to Terry, which I could not send, hiding them under my green plastic mattress. Terry’s stars are deep burgundy, & I bleed into the other colors when I mourn that we never made love.

Then Maggie was dragged onto our ward, in hot pink tights & purple smock, her teeth glittering with mischief Far from being depressed by the surroundings, she sang bawdy songs to the old ladies she fed, opening our misery with laughter. She was from a wealthy Marin family who sent her there to straighten her up & scare her into agreeing to marry the man they wanted to sell her off to, although they wouldn’t say it like that (she did). Somehow her wedding veil was among her belongings. She liked to wear it to the vast dining barrack because it annoyed the nurses so much. It was very beautiful, expensive lace which she trailed behind her like indifference. One day Maggie & I decided to get married. The guy who thought he was jesus was happy to perform our ceremony, held in the courtyard of our adjoining wards, surrounded by hundreds of old glass windows barred with iron grates. I wore Maggie’s veil & my Napa State Hospital white cardigan tied to make a train. We both carried huge bouquets of lilacs, which were blooming wildly in that hot, dry country. All our patient guests cheered & clapped so loudly that we couldn’t hear what jesus was saying. We only got to stroll down the sidewalk, showered with rice that Edith had filched from the kitchen where she was one of the cooks, before our union was rudely interrupted by burly male guards straining with anger in their white uniforms.

Everyone was locked down, some of us in solitary, & the bells went off for riot alert. Maggie’s poor veil was ripped apart by their feet & rage & arms. The head nurse (another lesbian) called Maggie’s mother that night, & before I had a chance to kiss her hello & goodbye, Maggie was driven away the next morning in her father’s limp-dick limo (her words again), as we ate our powdered eggs, silently depressed.

However, Maggie was a very sneaky & smart girl. She calmly arrived the following day in her VW bug (custom-painted purple, as are her stars) & said she had come back to collect her belongings, which no one had thought to pack up. Her mother, a master materialist (probably hoping for the veil), was very understanding. The hospital wanted to be accommodating in hope of future funds. So Maggie surprised me by returning to busily pack up not very much. We weren’t allowed to talk, & the nurses were watching us sharply until Ursula, understanding our need, threw her tennis shoe at the TV, screaming. Maggie palmed me a note to meet her by the lilac hedge behind the building, where she had conveniently parked. I left as though going to my new job at the dairy (cow shit apparently being a step up from human shit). The other women realized Ursula’s intentions & took off their keds, too. My last sight of that day room (where I had been declared incurably schizophrenic) was of flying sneakers, screaming technicians, breaking glass, & laughing patients—a really lovely melee. Because, of course, Maggie had returned to rescue me. We pulled out the backseat of her bug & I lay down across the battery. She laid a Mexican blanket over me, while I tried to project looking like a backseat. She piled her boxes, mostly empty, on top of me. The guards at the main gate were distracted by another call from the ward where the women who weren’t strapped down could not be contained. Maggie smiled, they gave her back her driver’s license, & off we went. On the other side of town, Maggie freed me from my seat charade & I tasted the wind in my hair for the first time in more than a year. She drove me to Big Sur, where I’d never been & they wouldn’t look for me (I had seven previous escapes, which is why I was on the violent ward so often, a curious juxtaposition—is freedom indeed violence, for lesbians?). In her trunk she had a sleeping bag, some food, money, & clothes that didn’t say Napa State on them for me. She dropped me near an overpass under which fellow fugitives of all kinds were camped, driving back to Marin, where perhaps she did escape marrying him. My belongings & three cartons of writing may still be in a dusty storage room at Napa. I guess I’m AWOL. Freedom’s worth the loss. If not for Maggie, I’d still be in the loony bin, incurable & terrified, not allowed to be a lesbian except with technicians. But I ripped that nurse out of the quilt.

Big Sur was rich with empty summer houses we raided for canned goods as a gang of teenage runaways, Vietnam War deserters, Rez escapees & drug dealers. We caught and roasted a wild pig. We hid out from the park rangers. We flirted with soldiers from the base for bags of potato chips, Hostess lemon pies, & chocolate bars. It was my theory we wouldn’t get scurvy if we ate the pies. We dropped acid & had orgies & stole into the mud baths at night. I was in a fog & detoxing from the nuthouse drugs, until one dusk when my eyes became diamond sharp at the sight of a thin young guy getting out of a hitchhiking ride at the convenience store near the campgrounds. He had black wavy hair cut in a DA falling forward over his face, wearing a leather motorcycle jacket that oozed sex. Our eyes caught across the parking lot & I fell in love like slamming into earth. I walked over, offering my open bag of BBQ pork rinds. Her reaching hand made me laugh & I blurted out, “I thought you were a guy.” She looked me up & down intensely, startled me by stroking my crotch with a quick secret movement, & growled, “Good.”]

chrystos, from cherry picker, from a woman like that: lesbian and bisexual writers tell their coming out stories, 2000

#chrystos #lesbian literature #terra preta #cw abuse #mad pride

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