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boyczar · 7 months ago

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#everything is coming together exactly as it should #everything is literally happening best case scenario for me all the time #shadow work illuminates so much #you can transmute any negative trait into a positive one #thank you to my parents #thank you to all my old friends #thank you to everyone in my life currently #it has all been for a reason #the suffering is never in vain #trauma gives rise to your excellence #only people suffering from post-traumatic STRESS will disagree #but as soon as they turn that into post-traumatic GROWTH they know the truth #if you are suffering from PTSD or C-PTSD i wish you endless healing #i know it hurts now and there’s nothing i could say that would instantly change that #but you have a gift for this world #waiting to be understood and utilized #i wish you nothing but happiness and growth #and clarity to see the gift and see your true Self #i am grateful for the things my parents taught me directly and indirectly #i have a parent with a personality disorder and another parent that is the most intensely critical person i’ve ever known #(also i recently learned that the term ‘Cluster B’ personality disorders is not often used anymore #it’s referred to as the ANTAGONISTIC Personailty Disorders which i feel like is way harsher than cluster b lmao #but it’s what psychology is finding to be more accurate #anyway…#i’m grateful to have grown up with people who were stunted emotionally bc it’s shown me how to recognize it in myself and others #i can help myself heal from it and i can walk away from those who are still struggling with it (and wish them well)#everything that has happened has seriously been for my absolute highest good and i didn’t see it in my moments of turmoil #but now it’s all abundantly clear #heaven is a place inside me #mine

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vaguely-concerned · 2 months ago

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the more I play the more I think lucanis basically knows it's illario who betrayed him right from the beginning (he's had a year in the ossuary to think. not that many people knew where he was going. when you ask him 'did Illario know you'd be on that ship' his only answer is the hardest flattest 'yes' you ever heard). so it's not so much about figuring out who the traitor is (because that's ludicrous. we all know. immediately. they didn't really bother to hide it lmao) as about methodically closing off every single avenue of denial lucanis has clung to that whole time with as much or little gentleness as you might prefer until he has no choice but to admit it. because the moment he has to admit it, he'll have to do something -- feel something -- about it. and that's such a catastrophic event in lucanis' inner landscape (he has had TWO people in this whole entire world up until now and will do anything to hold on to them with a heartbreaking child-like desperation, even at and especially through the detriment of his own self) that he'd rather just. not. what if we quite simply. didn't. what if we just stayed here in the emptiness where we can both pretend you didn't hurt me in a way I should never forgive. I have so much practice in that with caterina already it's always worked out great for everyone so far. (press x to fucking doubt but that's trauma logic for you lol)

after everything illario did, so much of the storm of lucanis' emotions around it is 'what the FUCK did you get yourself tangled up in this time and how do I get you out of this mess safely'. what's worse: the fact that your brother murdered you, or that he put himself in horrible danger doing so and thus exposed you to the risk of losing him forever. lucanis' heart certainly has an opinion here and it's fucking unhinged (affectionate)

the themes of dissociation in lucanis' character in general makes me feel nuts. allllll these contradictory messy things he needs to cut off from each other because they can't coexist or be easily reconciled inside him. but all remain stubbornly true separately anyway and will have their due one day. love and resentment. tenderness and fear and rage. terror and longing. love and freedom don't coexist. the burned out golden child anthem is playing in the background. he was always caterina's favourite and he has to keep striving to deserve that dubious honour with every breath he takes and then, presumably, mercifully, some day he will die and be excused and can rest. and until now he's suppressed all the -- natural, healthy, protective! -- negative feelings that threaten the few attachment relationships he actually has, at the cost of ever actually having his needs for connection and safety met and leaving his core self imprisoned and compromised. and spite goes 'what. no. that's dumb fuck that' (*spite voice* I do not understand that and even if I did I would not respect it) and does not allow him to fall back into that, which I think is what saves his life, ultimately. it took being possessed by a demon for lucanis to even contemplate telling anyone he loves 'no' in any way, but hey. whatever gets you there right lol

lucanis is dealing with the freeze response allll the way down baby. and he was even before the ossuary, that just turbo powered it and brought it to a breaking point way before it could happen naturally. but something was going to break eventually no matter what, and I'm just glad that in the end, through the power of friendship and also pure spite, it doesn't have to be him

#I am worried about him all the time. but also: his found family of godslaying maniacs and also the power of love. there are reasons to hope #when there was only one set of footprints in the sand that was the veilguard party holding lucanis in their arms #and going 'excuse you he said no FUCKING pickles!!!' while he's like '🥺should you guys really be -- ' 'YES'#dragon age #dragon age: the veilguard #dragon age: the veilguard spoilers #dragon age spoilers #lucanis dellamorte #dragon age meta #there's some messiness to his arc but what mary kirby managed to capture here about how this works. is everything to me #he is so exactly for me. I'm sorry for all the people he turned out not to be for. but not for him being for me #the gift of looking at him and hearing 'you're more than what you're going through' and be forced to annoyedly go 'okay #MAYBE that could be also be true for me. maybe.' he's going through it. and also so much more and the funniest person in the world #he's so worth it to still have in the world!!!!#I'm so glad we don't get to 'fix' his relationship with his family and especially caterina actually #that is stuff that would need to happen on a time scale waaay outside of the one in this game #and there's Something very real in having to go 'this is not for me to decide for you. who you love and what you do about it is yours'

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canisalbus · 7 months ago

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uh hi hello!! first i wanted to say i am deeply in love with your art (god those shapes, these lines, texture, anatomy, expression, EVERYTHING) and your latest drawing just moved something in me i cant quite grasp it, been thinking about it for a couple days. sooo i felt inspired and made myself a smol little machete out of uh wild clay so i could kiss him on the forehead before going to sleep, i hope you're ok with that? (also sorry he's kinda wonky, me and acrylics hate each other haha)

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#oh man are you seeing this??#little clay chete #that's absolutely precious you captured his rounded puppy shapes so well #those floppy ears especially #and the worried look on his eyes #really good likeness with facial proportions and snout shape #I really like the simplified form of his body it's so visually appealing #and I think your paintwork is just fine! you managed to include his pink gradients too #the inside of his ears looks almost like watercolor #and that nose detail!#also wild clay?? as in you harvested it from the nature yourself? that's so impressive #I've never used wild clay I've done ceramics before but only with processed and packaged clays #getting extra coolness points for that if you ask me #he's so terribly cute! thank you for showing me #please take good care of him he's just a little lad in a big world #gift art #putridcrow #own characters #Machete #also having a little crisis here atm because how come it has never crossed my mind to make something like this myself?#I think I should try that sometime

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jkvjimin · 7 months ago

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❝The lights we saw in each other Were saying the same thing The starlight that shines more in the deepest night❞

happy birthday, em! @jinstronaut 💜

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artharakka · 11 months ago

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Beautiful, But Broken

#bg3 #tiefling #tw blood #c: Viivi #so I redid my bg3 character because I wasn't feeling durge that much. So now my sibling does durge and I regular tav Viivi #(changed her to tiefling for funs)#at least I meant to do regular tav but uhhhhh things have gone very unfortunately very fast #anyway. Viivi is an artist; she does painting sculpting poetry and some prose. Experimenting with this and that #unfortunately she is deaf which made making connections a bit hard in the fine arts world #fortunately she has a patreon with one very generous patron (she's fey warlock)✨ who has bestowed some gifts of charms for her #which have opened doors of many art galleries #She's not a fighter so although she is confident in her own lane she is also very aware of her mortality #so she avoided any fights she could #which might have saved her but also got her into the mess of her lifetime #you see she couldn't fight the entire goblin camp and their leaders. She would've just not survived that. So she convinced them #that she is a True Soul. She is good at convincing people. It worked. They thought she is on their side. Good #Halsin also though Viivi was on their side. Halsin attacked Viivi's party. Now Halsin is dead.#So Viivi and her group were still alone deep within enemy fort. Viivi made new plans. She frees the prisoner who says he will warn the grov #Good thinks Viivi now they know to flee. I will go to Minthara and tell we got the information from prisoner of the grove location #she will trust us and we walk off #when we get back to grove they have not fled and Minthara is at the gates #Minthara wants Viivi to sound the horn. Zevlor wants Viivi to sound the horn. Viivi asks Zevlor to please tell this plan in detail.#Zevlor says just blow the horn already. Viivi does that. Minthara thanks Viivi for leaving the gate open as planned #Zevlor does not thank Viivi for that. Viivi is confused as she did not leave the gate open. (for real the damn gate was left open)#So I did a Massacre.#now Karlach is gone Wyll is dead. Lae'zel is also dead #but apparently Minthara is ready to be very loving and sincere with Viivi. The most helpful person she has met in very long time.#Viivi might love her #so that is how she's doing.

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batfossil-fr · 2 months ago

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one of the many aethers I've finished lately

#and a new addition to the “vaguely christmas”-y gang #as an aether F lover. ornaments was a gift to me personally #thank you asmo for the skin (have used it on like 5 different dragons already)#dragon share #flight rising #see I am the world's biggest fan of shara ishvalda and that's what these guys remind me of. how can I not love them

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inkskinned · 2 years ago

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it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.

yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.

it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.

how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.

chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?

how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.

"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.

i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.

#writeblr #warm up #i can't write rn but i have SO much words in here bc im reading the chorus of dragons books #(just started book 4)#and this woman's writing is just LIVING in my brain. let me out!!!#(i read roughly like 2-4 books a week usually bc i go on long walks with my dog but when a book is REALLY good like. it eats my life. )#anyway ...... so like here's a story that idk i've tried to explain to other people as being wild #but maybe im the only one who thinks it is wild???#so i play pokemon go (i just started in jan) bc i love pokemon and as i have mentioned i walk goblin for like an hour in the morning #and i don't like a lot of fitness trackers due to the fact it makes me .sad. but i also wanted the little digital rewards. enter pokemon go #anyway so they make you make friends to complete quests. so i used a reddit thread. i do not usually use reddit. i don't have an acct #i lurked. i just googled like ''pokemon go reddit '' and randomly added a bunch of numbers #i was on that page for all of 15 minutes. there are THOUSANDS of responses on that page.#here's what's wild: in that group of people. even though i am not on reddit and it was one random event once #it turns out one of those people lives in the town i live in. or at least very close. i only know this because #when we send each other gifts. it's from the same freaking area.#i can't ask them to meet up bc pokemon go doesn't have a messaging app lol but like . what are the fucking chances that #a random person posts in a random reddit thread and HAPPENS to get added by someone ELSE from their SAME TOWN #who by pure fucking CHANCE is ALSO playing pokemon go and looking for friends #i googled it there's only 42000 people in my broad region. the .......... smallness ! of the world!!!

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moeblob · 7 months ago

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A lil guy !

#honkai star rail #dan heng #genuinely have a million things i wanna draw and then zero energy #so dan heng in a hoodie #now i gotta go get dinner sooooo maybe that will give energy and then i can draw more of what i actually wanna draw #but i kinda spent like ... hours ? talking to my mom earlier today #since shes been in the hospital for many many days #so i was catching her up on whats been goin on and showed her silly lil videos #and telling her how hyped i was for summer hrid and she (very patient with my fe talk)#was like you always tell me about banners being bad so it must have made you REALLY happy to say the whole banner is good #and im like yeah and i had multiple people on multiple sites like hey salmon/moeblob did ya see the banner #and she was like thats so cool that people acknowledge who you like and im like yeah it is p cool #and then i told her how mad i was at the absolutely criminal act of limiting how you can watch clue (1985 hit movie)#like i told her yeah sure i own it twice on dvd and once on itunes and that the only way to watch those #are either desktop or ps2 and how i dont have access to my itunes email #and i dont have it on my laptop so i sadly would have to rebuy the movie on itunes under a new acct #then i said how i loved that it was free to watch with ads on yt and id watched it twice that way #but then recently wanted to watch it on there but laptop and hoo boy you have to buy or rent it now #so i v angrily was like fine whatever ill do the thing and leave my room and go watch it on my moms tv #while she isnt around and use her amazon prime where it should be included except ! IT WASNT!#YOU HAVE TO HAVE PRIME TO BUY OR RENT IT NOW TOO!#HOW ARE THEY DOING THIS AND WHY ! who in the world is watching this movie so much that isnt me that they have to charge for it now #on all platforms unless you straight up pirate it #and hey why would i of all people be needing to pirate a movie i own physically two times and digitally once #this is literally a personalized attack to me #and my mom was like i understand how you feel cause yeah thats really weird to do to a 1985 movie #and im like yes exactly i have morals and principles that make me opposed to this and its v maddening #and she said she understood and its ok next time we are having power issues and i have to shut down #that if i really wanna watch it i can rent it on her amazon account and i looked at her and shes like oh you feel v strongly about this #and i do! I HAVE HAD IT GIFTED TO ME TWICE ! I BOUGHT IT ONCE! WHY DO I HAVE TO RENT IT FOR MORE MONEY!

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unlimitedhearts · 9 months ago

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RIP Tumblr you would have loved Psych 😭

#psych #shawn spencer #burton guster #psych could have been as big as SPN on peak tumblr ngl #but that era of tumblr could have never handled psych #not in the least bc one of the mc's is a black man #im so so sorry gus #bruton gaster #Methuselah honeysuckle #ghee buttersnaps #they could not handle your unstoppable rizz #and dont even get me started on shawn #shawn spencer was not only BUILT to be a tumblr sexyman #HE WOULD HAVE REVELLED IN IT #james roday rodriguez would have worn that LIKE A BADGE OF HONOUR #how DARE you JETTISON his GIFT #anyway psych is perfect go watch psych #a show too perfect for this world #too pure #AND ACTUALLY HAS A SATISFYING SERIES FINALE #IMAGINE THAT #AND THREE MOVIES #CONTINUING THE STORY W/O BEATING A DEAD HORSE/COMMITTING CHARACTER ASSASSINATION #WHO'DA THUNK IT #Im not still salty about spn why do you ask?

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choccy-milky · 5 months ago

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tag nine people you want to get to know better!

ty for the tag @myokk and @theladyofshalott1989 !!💖💖

LAST SONG? - i deadass don't know💀i don't really listen to music i just always have streams/youtube vids on (I KNOW IM SORRY DONT @ ME) ....does the baroque noble party ambience i was listening to while working on my oneshot count??? shoutout to that video btw

FAVORITE COLOR? - yellow!!💛⭐

CURRENTLY WATCHING? - i also don't really watch shows💀....do 6 hour video essays on youtube count? in which case i love action button if you haven't watched his stuff (his boku no natsuyasumi video and his tokimeki memorial video are amazing, and his pacman video), and also super eyepatch wolf & hbomberguy (especially hbomb's 'pathologic is genius' video). also i listen to a podcast called '372 pages we'll never get back' that i highly recommend

LAST MOVIE? - 💀💀💀this is just a meme at this point💀💀💀I DONT EVEN REMEMBER....me and my roommate love watching crappy adam sandler movies so probably one of those??? or my neighbor totoro since i forced my niece to watch it 😍

SWEET/SPICY/SAVORY? - SAVORY BABY I LOVE SALT IM A SALT FIEND!!!🧂🧂🧂i put my grubby little hands straight into the olive jar and FEAST...also when i was in uni i used to keep a little ziploc bag of salt on me for when i ate out LMFAOOO and i always steal the salt shaker and bring it to my room and my roommate is always like DO YOU HAVE THE SALT AGAIN???......what can i say i love salt........(tho i still love sweets and spicy foods as well. and im addicted to coke zero btw. my body is comprised of 50% salt and 50% coke zero)

RELATIONSHIP STATUS? - almost 2 years in my poly relationship with seb and clora😍😍

CURRENT OBSESSIONS? - girl do u even have to ask........

LAST THING YOU GOOGLED? - probably timezones for when im talking to mutuals LMAOO...i just like to know what hour it is there no pressure tags: @the-ozzie @sparxyv @ccelicaa @kaviary-blog @siboom777 @boxdstars @versailles-black @limonnitsa @dwightschrute11 @ethniee @celestinawarlock @moonstruckmoony @syaolaurant @bassicallymaestra @lilac-ravenclaw @vienguinn @noelles-legacy @4ever2000lover @lamieboo @magic-in-onyx (NO PRESSURE FR FR I HATE TAGGING PPL BC I FEEL LIKE IM BOTHERING YALL BUT I ALSO DONT WANT TO LEAVE PPL OUT AT THE SAME TIME...SO IF YOURE READING THIS U CAN CONSIDER YOURSELF TAGGED AS WELL🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️OR CONSIDER YOURSELF UN-TAGGED IF YOU DONT WANNA DO IT BAHAHA)

#omg i yapped so much #ive also been watching Any Austin i love his videos especially his skyrim ones where he goes around critiquing skyrim taverns LMAO #him acting like some government bureaucrat in these fantasy worlds is just amazing #but i cannot recommend action button enough. tim rogers is a gift to this world PLEASE go watch his videos if you have the time LOL #also god i cannot stress enough how stressed i am in regards to tagging people BAHAHA #sorry for bothering you but ALSO im sorry that i DIDNT bother you #im like that keanu meme #sorry to hear that. OR happy that happened #ask #this isn’t an ask but i’m tagging it as one anyway bc it’s about me LOL i make the rules here

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loversmore · 2 years ago

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art by jimin. for @avizou ♡ by mona & ems.

#bts #jimin #btsedit #btsgif #park jimin #btsdaily #dailybts #pjmdaily #credit: namuspromised #dailybangtan #trackofthesoul #armysource #awi 🥺 happy birthday to our favourite artist 🥺🤍#we hope you'll have the most amazing day and that you'll have fun and that you will be surrounded by so much love :(#and also little treats and all the best things in the world!#we thought to make you a little something to give you as a gift because we love and adore you and #your creative and lovely and kind and supportive soul :(#the initial idea was to draw something but then a jimin gifset idea popped up (moni's) so here we are!!!!#we tried to combine your love for art (which is one of the things we love so much about you) with the one you have for jimin :( and we hope #that this little set will make you smile!!!!#we love you awi 🤍#alles gute zum geburtstag & buon compleanno <3 #*🎀📮mm

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esteville · 7 months ago

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when the world turns its back on you on misconstrued stories and orchestrated lies, I hope you are warm in the arms of your parents.

#the world is too unkind. may you persist anyway #esteban ocon #just having thoughts #his parents gave him the world and so he gifted them a future #and isnt that the purest form of love #dvoyd

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mel-loly · 16 days ago

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-Merry Christmas!💗✨

the tags (↓) are more important!!!

#I couldn't prepare anything for Christmas other than this... which I didn't like but ok. that's fine. that's what I have for now..!#*sigh* I'm very tired and still. it's not even the end of the year. it's christmas.. a date that I really like. by the way. I'm just tired..#but anyway. like I say every year. today. I'm going to say the same thing! christmas is not santa claus.#It's not mother claus and MUCH LESS “mel creator claus”.#christmas is not a “simple celebratory date” and it is also not a day just to think about gifts/food #(even if we want/like these things a lot and it is difficult not to think only about them)#at christmas. the birth of jesus. the birth of christ. is celebrated! a more than important date!#It is a special date and should be celebrated with those you love or at least “have some affinity with”.#or if you want to celebrate alone. that's fine. but don't forget to celebrate! christ was born and there is no better news than that!#celebrate. enjoy and make the most of this thought. don't forget to remember that this day is important.#that it is not just another “simple commemorative date”. but rather. a more than special date.#the birth of a person who came to save the world with his miracles..💛#a kiss and a hug. I love each one of you very much and I hope you will be patient with me if I don't answer you...... thank you very much!🫶#mel creator #my oc character #oc stuff #merry christmas #christmas art #i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog #art #my art #my art <3 #art mel #my art style

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cowgirls-blues · 3 months ago

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One of them knows how to install a doorknob.

#what if we were young and powerful witches and I gave you a portal to my place as a housewarming gift #which could mean nothing #(I know it's not specifically to her place but SHHH)#local cottagecore lesbian and her high femme gf #*grabs your face* listen to me what if they were exes #what if they had a thing when Indri joined the coven that failed as they each assumed more and more their station #and tbh as Indri started her murder plot #anyways I want to believe they fucked #and somewhere in her cold heart Indri has some memories concealed #and she's been bitter about wren stalling and opposing her for so long #do you see the vision #wbn #won pod #worlds beyond number fanart #the wizard the witch and the wild one #indri #morning wrensong #granmother wren #worlds beyond number #wwwo fanart #wwwo #coven of elders #witch of the world's heart #witch of the wind and stars #what would be their ship name #witch of the wind's heart? lmao #can't resist that 5'2 baddie #this is very simple and not rendered and I wanted it to be a fun quick thing so I have to be ok with it not being perfect #there will maybe be more art of them coming up so yeah maybe more rendering there #for now let's see if people are on board with this ship

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ilumel · 7 months ago

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not to be dramatic about crow’s haircut but it marks such a beautiful moment of character development for him. he finally met cayde, the man uldren killed, whose memory crow carried for years with a crushing sense of guilt, grief, and responsibility…and crow was welcomed by him instead of hated.

it allowed him to move forward. at least to an extent.

crow considered cayde to be one of the last pieces of his past life that he could never allow himself to be forgiven for—he was trapped by the knowledge of what his hands had done when they had been uldren’s. he kept uldren’s haircut like a punishment, an eternal reminder of the pain he had caused. i don’t think it’s a coincidence that the moment cayde embraced him as freely as he did, crow finally allowed himself to let go of that last physical tether to uldren.

he cuts his hair, and sees a new face in the mirror. his own. one that looks like him, not cayde-6’s murderer. he will always carry that pain, just as he will always honor cayde’s memory with newfound fondness…but now he meets his grief with the warmth and understanding that cayde gifted him. crow is free at last to allow himself to embrace his own identity, having finally been given permission to do so by the only person in the whole galaxy that could have granted it.

#i truly believe that only cayde could have given him that gift of freedom #he’s the one Uldren killed so to have him specifically encourage crow to walk his own path….it’s huge idk #and he’s still trying to make things right #trying to find fikrul :’)#crow means the entire world to me can you tell #messily written because i have spent the past ten hours crying on and off about the final mission SORRYYYY #there is some headcanon in this ofc but still #augghhhhh #forgive the rambling please :’))#the final shape spoilers #final shape spoilers #destiny 2 spoilers #crow destiny #my posts #.txt #crow tag

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violent138 · 3 months ago

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You guys remember when Alfred made Bruce think he killed his parents in that alleyway as a child and that Bruce was crazy and all his rogues were his caretakers at the asylum he was rightfully locked up in? So that Bruce wouldn't go out batmanning during a newfangled apocalypse?

#And then to add to this shenaniganery this Bruce was a clone that Diana gifted Alfred so he could have his son back during the end of the #world that Bruce original brought about. Super sweet.#never let anyone tell you Alfred is normal #batman last knight on earth #last knight on earth #dc comics #dc spoilers #alfred pennyworth #batman #bruce wayne #personal #batfamily

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