#but you all deserve only the very best in this world

[ennabear]

Gentle/soft sevika… im starving, lord have mercy

^also im the important exam anon! I dont know how i did in that day since the results would take 2 more weeks minimum, but im pretty sure whether it turns out too good or too bad than usual its thanks to you, imma keep you updated! I also think i did good because replaying what you wrote in my brain was just a the best kind of rewards^

IMPORTANT EXAM ANON HAIII!!!! i’m sure you did good hehe idk who you are or what you’re going to school for but i believe that you’re very smart… BUT THANK YOU!!! i’m so honored heheheh 😭 here’s some soft sevika 🤎🤎

everyone always thinks that sevika is aggressive and scary, especially because she can be on occasion. but in reality, you’ve never really seen her that way.

all of sevika’s violence and crimes are done outside of the walls of your shared home, as far away from them as she can manage. most of her killings and fights are done in a dark alleyway in the middle of nowhere, or closer to topside, where although it’s risky to be so close to those stuck ups who’ve never witnessed a crime before, she always gets away with it.

and she never does it out of cold blood. she only lays her hands on someone if they’ve wronged her first.

to you, her hands are the softest thing in the world. well— hand, technically, because she only has one human hand left. but both of them, whether flesh or metal, treat you with the greatest care possible.

late at night, they can be found wrapped around you, either holding you to her chest in a tight snuggle or pinning you to the bed while she snores on top of you. sometimes her metal fingers will trace little shapes into your back, the pointy tips of them making you shiver as she slowly lulls you to sleep.

sometimes she forgoes her mech arm completely, you being the only person she feels comfortable enough to be vulnerable with. still, her human arm will cling to your hips or your waist as you move around the house. whether that means doing chores or washing yourselves up or taking a well deserved afternoon nap on the couch.

sometimes she’ll even cry in front of you if she feels safe enough— which of course she does around you. you’re the only person on the whole planet who knows about her past and the things that still do scare her. like losing you, for example.

her favorite thing in the world is crying with you, although it seems dark. but to her, it’s like she finally feels seen. whether you’re crying over the same thing or just being mutually sad together, she loves to comfort you and feel it back at the same time. neither of you can even stay sad for long, because the other is trying to cheer you up by making you laugh or crack a smile, and it always ends in two teary-eyed giggles bubbling through the room.

[alt3rnata]

Going to answer them all :)

How many fics have you worked on since January? 

11 not including translations. 

What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year? 

Everything. This is the first time I've written anything this year since I tried to write a Dragon Age Origins fic in school (that was a long time ago). 

What piece of media inspired you the most? (This can be the fandom you wrote the most for, the one that spawned the most ideas, the one you thought about the most, etc.) 

Xenoblade Chronicles 3. God bless Monolith studio.

How many fandoms did you write for this year? 

Two. The second one is a micro fandom around some black metal band albums I listened accidentally, but that was fun.  

What ships captured your heart? 

Oleg/Ashera (XC3) is the main one, which is funny because in my head it has nothing to do with True Love Till Death. 

What characters captured your heart? 

Oleg (Teach) from XC3, James Sunderland from Silent Hill 2, Lann from Pathfinders WOTR.

Did you write for any new fandoms or ships this year? 

Yeah, see question 2. 

What fic meant the most to you to write? 

“Slayer and the Beast” because it was the first, and I wrote it with the best intentions, without putting anything dark into it, as I sometimes like to do.

What fic made you feel the happiest to work on? 

This one isn’t published yet. It’s working title is "The Element of Chaos" and it’s XC3 post-canon. 

What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing? 

“What You Deserve” because I had to keep some quite violent details in my head, and I was glad to finally let them go. But in the process I learned a lot of new things. Hardly anyone can guess how much is put into this text.

What fic was the most difficult to write? 

“The Glitch” because it was a self-challenge and I had to fully rewrite that bitch 5 or 6 times, I don’t remember… But I had some fun there as a game developer writing fic about XC3 as a game.

What fic was the easiest to write? 

“Intersecting Lines”. I made it to relax (and now it's my work with the most kudos). 

What were your shortest and longest fics posted this year? 

“Slayer and the Beast” is the longest and “Intersecting Lines” is the shortest. I tried to express my thoughts briefly and throw out everything unnecessary. Although sometimes this leads to me presenting events too truncated. 

What were your go-to writing songs? 

Esoterica’s “In Dreams” and Guilt Machine’s “On this perfect day” whole albums. 

What was the hardest fic to title? 

“It's a small world. It's a vast world.” Still not sure if it’s good. 

What's your favorite title of the year? 

“Slayer and the Beast”, proud of it. 

Share your favorite opening line 

“At first, everything is dark. It is silent, the only sound you can hear is the ticking of a clock. Then the sound of footsteps becomes audible, getting closer. A key turns in the lock. And suddenly the darkness is cut by a narrow strip of bright light, and then it grows into a rectangle as the man outside opens the door and steps inside. He closes the door behind him and flicks the switch. Let there be light.”

— "The Element of Chaos" 

Share your favorite ending line 

“Say hi to Rex and A. Someday we will all meet again, if you weren’t kidding... But now I have to go home. I think boys are already making breakfast.”   She gets out of the water, picks up her stuff, and takes one last look at the horizon. Then she walks barefoot down the path, humming to herself, until she disappears from sight.  In the very heart of Origin, all three hear that distant greeting. A is the one who smiles. 

— “The Glitch” 

Share your favorite piece of dialogue 

He loosened the noose. Ashera took a shuddering breath and coughed.    “Was it enough like me? Did you have your fun?” he asked. His own voice sounded hoarse.    “I would rate this nine out of ten,” Ashera answered when she finally caught her breath and was able to speak. Not what he expected to hear from a person he had just nearly killed. 

— “Slayer and the Beast” 

Share your funniest line 

Well, I have a weird concept of ‘funny’. 

“But Oleg no longer had hundreds of years of life in store for him, only a measly 150 years at most. He remembered well the feeling that had appeared immediately after the Intersection, as if time had suddenly sped up. For those races that had previously had a longer lifespan and had grown up with this knowledge, the worry that they would not have enough time for anything had become commonplace. Against this background, the carefree way in which the short-lived races of both worlds, whose lives had, on the contrary, lengthened on average, spent their time, even caused some envy.” 

— "The Element of Chaos" 

What's something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story? 

Every time when the characters just do something I did not intend for them and the story takes an unexpected turn. 

What writing programs did you use? Did you write by hand? 

I use MS Word + I write by hand some notes, plans, timelines, etc. 

If you had to choose one, what was THE most satisfying writing moment of your year? 

I have one piece of writing that I can reread without thinking that "I could have done it better, but my skills weren't good enough." It's very satisfying.

Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic? 

Just re-reading it and looking at stats. 

How did you recharge between fics? 

I don't need to recharge, it is my leisure. I'm constantly reading other people's work, fiction and non-fiction, and I have a life to gain new impressions. 

Did you create fanworks other than fic? 

Nope. 

How many events did you take part in? (bangs, exchanges, ship weeks, zines, prompt memes, they all count!) 

Hmm, Kinktober 2024, I guess. 

If this were an awards show, who would you thank? 

My audience of me, myself and I. And that one reader who left so good, thoughtful comments under “The Glitch” and appreciated my silly tech jokes and weird ideas. This made me feel that my work was worthwhile. 

What's left on your to-do list for 2024? 

I don’t have a plan, actually, things will be done when I have time. 

What would you like to write next year? 

I wish to work more on non-romantic and original things or AUs to practice working on storylines. Because I often find myself making up a storyline around a romantic line and fitting the events to it, rather than thinking them through as something independent. Of course, that doesn't mean inspiration won't take me in a completely different direction. 

A slightly revised version of last year's questions! Two ways to play: Reblog and have your followers send you numbers, or answer the whole list!

How many fics have you worked on since January?

What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year?

What piece of media inspired you the most? (This can be the fandom you wrote the most for, the one that spawned the most ideas, the one you thought about the most, etc.)

How many fandoms did you write for this year?

What ships captured your heart?

What characters captured your heart?

Did you write for any new fandoms or ships this year?

What fic meant the most to you to write?

What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing?

What fic was the most difficult to write?

What fic was the easiest to write?

What were your shortest and longest fics posted this year?

What were your go-to writing songs?

What was the hardest fic to title?

What's your favorite title of the year?

Share your favorite opening line

Share your favorite ending line

Share your favorite piece of dialogue

Share your funniest line

What's something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story?

What writing programs did you use? Did you write by hand?

If you had to choose one, what was THE most satisfying writing moment of your year?

Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic?

How did you recharge between fics?

Did you create fanworks other than fic?

How many events did you take part in? (bangs, exchanges, ship weeks, zines, prompt memes, they all count!)

If this were an awards show, who would you thank?

What's left on your to-do list for 2024?

What would you like to write next year?

[artbyblastweave]

Is it weird that, the more posts you make about how being a genre fiction protagonist would suck and ruin your life (posts I love and think are great), the more I want to go full "No, suck eggs, Alan Moore, being a superhero is cool and good, actually?" I can't tell if it's mindless contraiantism or an actual point.

I think it's an understandable impulse, because there are absolutely strains of very-online genre-fic and cape-fic critique that, if taken super seriously as a blueprint for how fiction ought to be written, would basically amount to the Wertham Scare with a social justice gloss, and we don't need a second one of those. If a person bins the entire superhero genre as "irredeemably fascist" or anything similar, for example, I start paying extremely close attention to the implicit back half of that proclamation, the part where they lay out what part of that condemnation they consider actionable. The censorious should be made to eat their own black markers. You can do whatever you want forever.

On the other hand, you really can't get around what happens to a lot of escapist genre-fic- cape-fic in particular- if you apply any kind of scrutiny or big-boy grown up emotional or moral logic to it whatsoever. It wasn't built to survive that level of scrutiny, it wasn't built to still see publication 80 years after the fact- and indeed, stuff in that space that isn't seeing active mass-market success, John Carter and the like, that tends to get judged basically as harshly as I think it deserves. There really isn't any way around the fact that we're all playing Frankenstein with the innards of mass-market children's stories. And moreover I feel like there's an offputting mealy-mouthedness to a lot of the contemporary big-two output that notices the cracks in the foundation and tries to have their cake and eat it too, having capes that beat bad guys up but in a markedly progressive way. A certain level of pessimism and cynicism is often the only believable way to get those wires to connect if you're trying to make your spandex crowd interface with real-world cynicism. (Superman is ironically one of the Big-two properties that I think most consistently threads this needle. Batman has a harder time due to the billionaire thing. The X-Men are turbofucked and have been for a while.)

Astro City is one of the capethings that I think hits the best balance on all of this, and nonetheless one of the worldbuilding beats that does a lot of the heavy lifting on believability for me is that the Nixon Admin executed the setting's Captain American analogue on trumped-up charges as a show of force and as a distraction from Watergate. Because he would! He would do that! "What about Nixon" is a fantastic litmus test for this kind of thing IMO- even if the answer is that he was the head of a cult that built a mutant-powered flying saucer to take over the world with, that's still better than dodging the question entirely, or having Superman suck off Reagan like Byrne did.

[see-arcane]

When it comes to the question of 'Would polyamory have saved them?' in terms of Nosferatus (Thoseferatu), the ranking goes like this:

Nosferatu, 1922: Orlok is way too interested in the Hutters, but in like. A weird bug way. All the plague stuff might have been avoided if the Hutters just let him cling ominously to a wall in their house. Maybe give him a little sippy cup of blood once in a while. He mainly just stares at them all night. It's fine. They're fine.

VERDICT: Polyamory would have saved them, if only on paper. Orlok is not their third, but he is there. Staring. No telling if it actually makes him happy as he has no expressions, but it's chill. The rats are just hanging out. The Hutters are very careful with their bread knives. It's fine, it's cool.

Nosferatu the Vampyre, 1979: Everyone's names are Draculafied, but for all intents and purposes, they're filling the same roles as Orlok, Ellen and Thomas of 1922. That said, Orlok (called Dracula) is the saddest wettest most soggy and mournful death-bringing immortal ever put to screen. He undeadifies Thomas (now Jonathan) and begs Ellen (now Mina sorry, 'Lucy') for a scrap of love rather than just blood. Acts like an elementary schooler with a crush. Wanted to collect the full Harker-Hutter duo so so bad, it's the first thing he's wanted in centuries p l e a s e

VERDICT: Polyamory might have saved the three of them specifically, but it'd be hell for everyone else as evidenced by Thomas-Jonathan turning full Nosferatu by the end and riding off to sow more death. The full polycule would have been a tripled plague on the world. But it'd be almost worth it to have all three of them still kicking.

Nosferatu, 2024: Oh man. No. No no no. At best, Orlok introduced the Hutters to the concept of antique BDSM, but the cadaverous bastard himself is a terrible dom. All aggro, no aftercare, no safewords, no acknowledgment of consent beyond some bullshit ~but we have a covenant~ technicalities to coerce both Hutters into a corner. Also, textbook abuser beats in threatening loved ones and assaulting Thomas and Ellen as shows of power. The Hutters deserve a better third, with or without the supernatural super-death plague.

VERDICT: Polyamory might have saved the Hutters if they had a better undead addition to their situation--I recommend Gautier's hedonistic dream-trysting Clarimonde, she'd show them a good time--but with Orlok? Fuck no. He's just in it to plant a flag of 'I'm owed access to you because you pinkie promised as a teenager!!' ownership on Ellen and be weird at Thomas in full 'It's not gay if I'm the top/I will prove I am more Man by making you the Woman' mode. Utter trashfire of a relationship in the works there.

That being said, the very rancidness of that hypothetical throuple is such an enticing gothic trainwreck to envision.

Orlok: "This is my contractually entrapped undead forever-bride, Ellen, and our wife, Thomas." :)

Dracula, wishing he'd stayed home on his end of the Carpathian mountain range: "You mean groom?"

Orlok: "I said what I said." :)

[agirlwithglam]

embarrassment is a choice.

so today i was feeling a bit tormented by something that happened a while ago (a year ago i think even!) and t

bh idk why it came up so randomly now, but it just makes me cringe and feel so embarrassed by what happened. so i'm taking it as a sign to write this post for anyone who needs it.

embarrassment is a choice.

i know how icky it can feel to recall a past memory about something that happened, but let me just tell you one thing; the past doesn't exist. the past only exists in your mind. it only exists because you give it your attention and your energy. so if you don't like the way something unfolded out in the past, change it! go into your mind, go through the whole situation and then just change what happened. this exercise is just something to give you a peace of mind so you're not bothered by what had happened.

but whats important to know about embarrassment is that it only exists if you choose it. if you choose to be embarrassed.

listen honey, the only time someone would judge you is that either a) they want to be at such a high place that you're currently at & their insecure, or b) they're to afraid about what other people think to be doing what you are doing right now. c) or they're just really sad with their own lives. no one listens to what this person has to say so the only time people do listen is when they talk about you.

in fact, you should seriously applaud yourself for doing something so daring, so scary something outside of your comfort zone instead of just simply staying quiet and small.

this also links into exposure therapy. the more you do something that scares you and its outside of your comfort zone like being alone, or going after an ambitious goal, the more you start to become used to the feeling. you start to become more numb to it so it means that you're not as affected or sensitive to it as you used to be.

right now, the best thing you can do is just do it anyway.

"they're gonna judge you anyway so you might as well just do it"

and think: will this matter in a year? will be a big deal in 5 years? chances are, it won't be. and plus, anyone who does make you feel ashamed or cringy for doing you and being yourself, they don't deserve a space in your life anyway. you're being GUIDED on a higher path to a life with better people, better environment. so girl, unless you're not hurting anyone, GO!! LIVE YOUR LIFE!!!

its not your life if you're living it based on other people!

at the end of the day, we all die. we're on this earth for a limited time. you will grow old, the haters will grow old, then, we will all leave this earth. and that is a very peaceful thing to understand. nothing matters at all. you'll be 90 on your deathbed one day and you want to be thinking "i lived. i lived an amazing, happy, fulfilling. authentic life." so right now, you do everything that will make you feel that way when that day comes without another care in the world for what someone else things.

love you always, have a beautiful day. xoxo, Vanilla <3

[thereoncewasagirlnamedjane]

deck the halls.

‣ pairing — ransom drysdale x f!reader

‣ contents — oneshot, coarse language, fluff, xmas/holidays, mutual disdain but it’s actually just mutual not-so-secret shameful pining

‣ synopsis — for the first time, you think that working for linda drysdale the night before christmas might not be such a bad thing after all.

‣ word count — 3.4k

‣ notes — tbh i’m not very happy with how this turned out but whatever, i’ve been stressing about this for way too long because it’s my first ransom fic, and i’m just done lol. shout out to @intrepidacious though for chatting with me about this fic all winter while i struggled, doing her best to motivate me and letting me vent my writing frustrations through the entire process. ilysm nika 💕

✩ read on ao3 ✩ janie’s masterlist ✩ library blog

Christmastime is here Happiness and cheer Fun for all that children call Their favourite time of yea—

You angrily jam the pad of your finger against the speaker’s power button, cutting off the quaint holiday music and plummeting Linda Drysdale’s normally busy real estate office into silence.

For someone who consistently prides themselves on being so sensible and logical, you sure can be stupid sometimes.

Because you drag a free office chair towards you, anchoring it against the wall as best as you can before climbing on top of it. You teeter precariously, cursing under your breath as you strain to loop a gaudy red and green garland over the push pins above the office doorway.

Linda, however, is even stupider, asking you to put up these god awful decorations before going home, not even providing you with so much as a step stool to do so—even though you obviously aren’t tall enough to reach on your own, even though she said you didn’t have to work overtime today (why, thank you Linda, considering it’s Christmas Eve and all), even though it was already 4:45 when she asked.

One phone call would be all it took to have OSHA crawling up her ass, but because you were only ever a badass in your own head, long after the conversation was over and there was no longer anything you could do about it, you just nodded meekly at your boss instead of telling her exactly where you thought she could shove her precious decorations.

Besides, she’d probably walk away with nothing more than a slap on her wrist anyway—if that.

“A bit to the left, Cindy Lou Who,” comes a voice, the low dulcet baritones that are the bane of your existence, like a persistent under-the-skin itch you can’t ever seem to scratch. You take a deep stabilizing breath upon hearing the nickname, a heat flaring in your cheeks that has nothing to do with the whiskey-spiked hot chocolates you’ve been secretly sipping all day.

You shoot him a withered glare over your shoulder. Ransom, the devil-spawn of your she-devil boss, is lounging lazily in your chair, leaning back with his arms casually linked over his abdomen as he observes your efforts to stay balanced and graceful.

Trust the smug little brat to show up tonight of all nights, when your patience is already wearing thin. No doubt he’s just here to piss you off before swanning over to the posh holiday party happening at his mother’s place tonight—one you’ve never been invited to despite all your years working for Linda, by the way—while you trudge home to a dark and empty studio apartment, with not even so much as a goldfish to welcome you back.

Ransom just smirks back at you through a mouthful of white chocolate chips and macadamia nuts, his hand already rummaging for another cookie from the package he’s stolen right out of the bottom drawer of your desk.

You release a huff of frustration.

There he sits, without a care in the world in his perfectly tailored wool coat and immaculately styled hair that somehow remains untouched by the howling winter wind outside, looking like he’s just stepped out of an issue of GQ.

He doesn’t deserve it, you lament, his coat already starting to pill at the undersides of the sleeves and his sweater probably just a tug at one loose strand away from unravelling completely.

Whoops. You almost fall off the chair for the fifth time since you started this ridiculous endeavour, trying to shake off the mental image of a very shirtless Ransom, tangled in a web of soft white yarn.

What? You can hate someone down to their grimy little bones and still think they’re hot.

Besides, the devil wouldn’t be the devil if he weren’t tempting, would he?

“A real piece of work… the both of you…” you mutter to yourself now, your colourful vocabulary back in full working order now that Linda is holed away in her office and well out of earshot. “She could cut me some slack, you know… Christmas, for crying out loud… and I haven’t eaten all day!”

The asshole nepo-baby just peers up at you past the phone he’s been holding up in front of his face, blinking lazily and not offering any kind of response or assistance—not that you’d expected him to.

“Right, I forgot who I was talking to,” you speak slowly and deliberately, like you’re explaining something rather complicated to a small child. “You see, us humans need to eat food regularly for sustenance.”

“Wow,” Ransom deadpans, his voice muffled through cookie crumbs.

“Yeah, it is terribly inconvenient,” you shrug exaggeratedly, “but not all of us can subsist on the shards of broken souls and children’s nightmares, can we?”

“Calling me the devil again?” He scoffs, rolling his eyes. “You’re so original; how about you get a new thing?”

“Don’t you have some place to be?” You sneer, your grip tightening on the garland, the plastic biting into your palms as you twist a string of fairy lights around the rest of it. “Why the fuck are you even here?”

It’s a perfectly valid question. Linda is always threatening to cut her son off, but that hasn’t prevented him from skipping out on work as much as possible and galavanting around the city, maxing out her credit cards every chance he gets.

But you know she’ll never actually follow through; He shows himself here just often enough to keep her from seriously considering it, doing his small part to show off a carefully crafted picture for the masses—showing the scions of Boston’s wealthiest family in a united front.

And if there’s one thing Ransom likes more than he hates his family or earning an honest wage, it’s the weight of green lining the deep but frayed pockets of his expensive designer pants.

That shiny Drysdale veneer is all that matters, after all, and you know very well that Ransom’s only real job is to keep it nice and polished. But you’ve been working long enough at this soul-sucking place to notice the telltale signs, to see the cracks beneath the varnish.

The way you swear you see a flicker of something that looks a lot like dread whenever Linda calls his name.

The way his signature smirk twitches with just a hint of irritation whenever some angry coworker, once again passed over for a long overdue promotion in favour of giving Ransom a hefty allowance bonus, calls him a talentless, hopeless, literal son of a bitch.

The way he cracks those self-deprecating jokes about how the only real ambition he has in life is finding new ways to disappoint his relatives, and squander as much of the family fortune as he possibly can.

It’s no surprise, really, that Ransom’s turned out the way he has. You’ve heard the way they all talk about him sometimes, his family seemingly oblivious to your working-class existence.

Never mind the fact that whenever you happen to glance over at him, Ransom’s eyes are almost always on you—watching and assessing with that same inscrutable expression on his face.

Not that you pay close attention or anything.

Not that you care, either.

And never will you admit that it unnerves the hell out of you, almost like he’s trying to see through you—right down to the restless person who hides beneath a false bravado, a sarcastic sense of humour, and mountains of paperwork piled up high on your desk.

The feeling of being seen, so terrible and stirring at the same time.

And yet, you shiver, there’s something about it that rivets you. Something electric, like a live wire running just beneath your skin. It’s the feeling you get when he looks at you with those icy blue eyes, his expression going from scathing to almost inquisitive within seconds, when the two of you are trading jabs and insults like his mother isn’t the one who signs your paycheques.

If you are carbon, then he’s the igniting flame.

But you know better, don’t you? Ransom is trouble, plain and simple—the kind with zero direction in life, the kind with a new girl on his arm every week, leaving them to wake up in the mornings to cold bed sheets and memories of promises he’d never intended to keep.

You will die a fiery death before you come another notch on his bedpost. Not that you even care whether he thinks of you that way at all, because even the idea of doing that with Ransom is—

Shit. You shiver again.

You’re playing with fire by even thinking about him at all, even though you feel the incredibly annoying pull of his presence like a magnet, even though you know you need to stay as far away from him as possible, and even though you are very keenly aware that there’s something here.

It looms large yet goes unacknowledged whenever your eyes lock, when he’s looking at you like he wants to bury you and devour you at the same time, when you’re itching with the knowledge that you’re only keeping him at as much of a distance as you can physically stand.

Why else haven’t you told him yet, in no uncertain terms, to fuck right off?

Because there’s a part of you that can’t help but wonder what it would be like to let yourself burn—to feel the heat of that passion you can see in his eyes that he never seems to give into, to feel whatever warmth he might muster from beneath the complicated layers of that thing beating in his chest, to feel him next to you as that terrible something you won’t ever name finally erupts and consumes everything in its path.

Ugh. You absolutely loathe yourself for it, and it makes you want to bash your forehead repeatedly against the wall.

“Someone’s going on the naughty list,” Ransom snickers, the sound infuriatingly close now. You do your best not to startle at the new proximity; he’s put his phone away, unfolded himself from your chair with that unexpectedly languid grace, crossing the room to toss your now empty package of cookies into the trash. “And is that any way to speak to a valued coworker?”

“You? Valued? Coworker?”

“Oh, don’t be jealous, Cindy Lou,” he chides, leaning against the edge of an empty desk barely a step away, crossing his arms over his broad chest, then lowering his voice to whisper conspiratorially, “I hear it’s a sin.”

“Jealous?” You laugh humourlessly, snorting in a way that is decidedly very unladylike. “Of what? The fact that you’ve never worked a day in your life and have the soft white hands of a geisha?”

“Oh yeah? Been thinking about my hands a lot, have you?” He smirks again, and you bite back an exasperated moan—er, groan.

“Namely,” you say sarcastically, turning away from him and reaching up for a particularly high spot. “Breaking all the feeble little bones in your tiny rat-like claws, preferably with a nice sturdy lump of coal.”

“I’m not the one who’s gone on a rampage,” Ransom gestures to the office, now adorned with shiny little baubles, bundles of sparkly tinsel, and rolls of satin ribbon, “and vandalized the office.”

“Vandal—it looks festive, you heartless ghoul!” You whip around to glare at him again, momentarily forgetting your unstable position. But instead of rolling away from the wall and taking you with it, the chair beneath you stays firmly in place. Confused, you glance down to see Ransom’s outstretched feet casually braced against the legs.

Your head snaps up so quickly you think you might get whiplash, eyes narrowing accusatorially only to see him looking away, feigning nonchalance despite the fact that his ears are turning red.

Blood rushes to your cheeks, a traitorous warmth spreading through them. You curse mentally for the umpteenth time, feeling the corners of your perfidious mouth threatening to curve up into a smile.

The bar really is in hell, isn’t it?

“You…” you squeak, clearing your throat a few times to get your voice back to normal. “It’s five. You should go get your mother now.”

“Why, am I distracting you?” Ransom replies, tucking his hands into his pockets and still not making eye contact. “And don’t rush me. I’d rather eat glass than sit through another one of Linda’s fuckin’ Christmas parties.”

“Right, because of your repellant personality?” You quip only half-sarcastically.

“So I’m told,” he drawls, but strangely he sounds more pleased than offended by your observation. “But then again, you’re no picnic either, are you Cindy?”

“Excuse me?” You finally climb off the chair, the last of the garland securely in place. You ignore those stupid feelings stirring inside you at the sight of him retracting his legs a second too slow, and only when both your feet are firmly on the floor.

“You can’t tell me you work so hard because you like your job,” he chortles, his smirk twisting into something just a tiny bit meaner this time. “Aw, sweetheart, do you not have any friends?”

You snort so loud it almost hurts, trying not to focus on just how much you and Ransom have in common—a fact he also seems content to leave unaddressed. “Oh, like you do?”

The mental image of Ransom sitting in his mother’s living room, laughing and sharing wine with a bunch of people in front of a roaring fire like he isn’t a raging sociopath makes you shudder.

“Although, I guess I am curious,” you relent with an inquisitive tilt of your head, ignoring the weight of his heavy gaze on your back as you rummage through the last of the decorations.

“Hm, do tell,” you hear him chuckle.

“About Christmas, you bumbling idiot,” you retort, rolling your eyes. “Can’t picture you and Linda decorating a tree or opening presents together.”

“Okay, that’s not even funny,” he grumbles, his expression twisting into something sour.

“Never? Not even when you were a kid?” You ask before you can stop yourself. Dangerous territory. You know too much about his personal life as it is, and this would only humanize him and that’s the very last thing you want.

“Sometimes,” he admits after a few seconds of agonizing silence, his voice uncharacteristically quiet, your eyes meeting, as always, when you look up at him. “Only ever at Harlan’s.”

You stare, unsure what to do with the underlying hint of something in his voice that doesn’t really belong. Harlan is the only person in his family you actually like, who exudes warmth and care even towards a spoiled and ungrateful grandson, and it takes you a moment to realize that the thing in Ransom’s voice might be affection.

It’s alien and unnerving, to say the least, but you still feel a traitorous tug at your heart strings.

“I can’t picture you as a kid,” you say, somehow managing to keep your voice from trembling as you quickly change the subject. Sweet Christmases with his adoring grandpa shouldn’t be something you associate with this overgrown man-child. And even if it is, it doesn’t change the fact that Ransom is a giant, gaping asshole. “I just see you, but… smaller.”

“And I bet you were just a naive little princess,” he smirks when you glare at him, “doting parents, thoughtful presents, cookies for Santa—spoiled in your own way.”

“Oh, don’t get it twisted,” you shake your head, putting up a defensive hand, “we aren’t sharing. That’s not what this is.”

“But you know what they say, Cindy,” he says as he leans in closer, stopping just inches away, so close you can smell the lingering scent of cinnamon and nutmeg on his breath, mingling with the saccharine aroma of peppermint and artificial pine clinging to his sweater. “Sharing is caring.”

His eyes blaze in an unspoken challenge, but before you can do anything else, like maybe start thinking that the bad idea that’s been plaguing you ever since you met this infernal man isn’t such a bad idea after all, the sound of Linda’s voice cuts through the air, as sharp as the diamonds she wears on her fingers.

“What are you two doing?”

The spell is broken, and Ransom looks away with that same infuriating smile that makes you both want to punch and ki—

“Hello, Mother,” Ransom all but sneers.

You step away with considerable effort, wringing your hands in front of you. Linda narrows her eyes in thinly-veiled suspicion, but doesn’t say anything as she begins walking towards you.

Ransom steps in front of you, shoving his hands into his pockets and jingling his keys, “We’d better get going. Your chariot awaits.”

“Have a nice evening, Mrs. Drysdale,” you pipe up, watching nervously as her eyes sweep across the office and your carefully placed decorations with cool indifference. She nods slightly and you breathe a sigh of relief; that’s as close to a thank you as you’ll ever get.

“Ransom, be a dear and go start the car,” Linda says, urging him towards the door with a sweep of her hand. Her son hesitates for only a millisecond, not even looking back as he turns on his heels and leaves.

Only you notice that his hands are clenched at his sides.

“Merry Christmas, dear,” she smiles tightly as she hands you an envelope likely containing your holiday bonus, and you snap back to attention. You take it from her with a quiet thank you, but then her smile quickly turns into a stern frown. “But don’t make a habit of having food delivered here.”

“Food?” You repeat, your brows coming together in confusion. Linda puts on her fur coat, pointing a single gloved finger at the doors. There is a delivery person standing on the other side of the glass, lifting and pointing at a plastic bag heavy with takeout containers.

“Air the place out before you leave,” Linda says as she breezes past him, not even turning back while she lifts a hand in dismissal.

Confused, you follow in her tracks, staring after her as she makes a dissatisfied face at Ransom’s car pulled right up next to the curb. You see him roll his eyes, leaning over to unlock and push the door open for her. Linda doesn’t look too thrilled, but steps in anyway. They drive away, a hint of a smile on Ransom’s face even though it looks like Linda’s already started in on him with her usual longwinded lectures.

You tell the delivery boy you didn’t order anything, but he looks just as puzzled. He checks the receipt and says your name, the office address, which you confirm are correct. He then recites the order: scallion pancakes, rice noodle rolls, steamed crystal dumplings, and a small black sesame latte—your standing order from your favourite restaurant in Chinatown, reserved for nights when you were working late.

“It’s already paid for,” he says, “you might as well take it.”

You do, locking the doors once he leaves and set the bag down onto a nearby desk. Before you’ve even untied it and opened the containers to check their contents, the grin that’s been brewing all night finally breaks free.

Because there’s only a handful of people in the world who know you’re here at the moment, but only one who knows you haven’t eaten yet today, and who knows that despite having permission to leave for the night, you’ll probably settle in for another few hours of tedious paperwork.

Still, you finish every last crumb of your dinner feeling lighter than you have all week.

Maybe you’ll ask him next time, despite all the reasons you probably shouldn’t, whatever happened to sharing is caring?—even if it sounds like an invitation.

And maybe you feel cheeky enough to send him a quick email before logging off, cackling to yourself when he finally fires back a scathing reply a few hours later, likely still sitting in a room full of people just like his mother, trying not to be absolutely miserable.

From: “El Diablo” <rdrysdale@drysdaleproperties.com> To: Reception <reception@drysdaleproperties.com> Subject: RE: Merry Christmas Oh fuck off, I don’t know what you’re talking about. ——————— From: Reception <reception@drysdaleproperties.com> To: “El Diablo” <rdrysdale@drysdaleproperties.com> Subject: Merry Christmas …and thanks for dinner, Drysdale.

And if, when you’re finally home long after the midnight hour, you’re tucked into bed feeling full and warm with the temptation to raise your lips into a smile as you drift off to sleep?

Well.

That’s really nobody’s business but your own, is it? 

fin.

[pleasantphantomhologram]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Y/N 

Warning: NONE, PURELY FLUFF <3

Summary: Adulting as a girl in this shitty world means that every single bare minimum thing that your soon to be boyfriend/crush did is such a treasure for you. You easily impress by this type of man because all men in your life including your dad are very shitty. But, with Jason Todd, your new boyfriend, everything has changed and HE teaches you more than that. 

A/n: hey bare minimum gurl, how is your day lately? Yes, i am still on my holiday, and I want to write this things that happened around me. Yes, many of my girlfriends are having a boyfriend, but they are easily impressed by all this bare minimum act that their boyfriends did. All i could say is… please don’t ever settle for bare minimum, gurl. You deserved so much more 🥰 

Being a girl is hard. That’s the only fact that you know since you are in school and now an adult working woman who has lived in Gotham city for almost 3 years. Yes, you are working so hard to be here, and now all of your hard work is paying off. You are a copywriter for some big agency here. It’s not that you are having this ‘Sex and The City’ dream, at some point you hate your job, but at least, the pay is not bad and you can afford this small studio apartment with your furry pet, a british shorthair cat named Zach. 

It seems that your life is perfectly fine, but, of course it’s not because you are just a girl. You love reading romance novels, it’s like an escapism of your sometimes shitty boss. You have this certain type of favorite trope and dream boy, but, in real life you are very easy to impress by the bare minimum thing that every bumble match guy does to you.

You have many ex-(shitty)boyfriends, and there are also shitty crushes and it seems you never learnt from your previous relationship. But, when you meet this 28 year old man named Jason Todd from one of the parties that your friends held, everything seems different.

He is not just asking about how’s your day, or how he is always checking you out (and you are not even in a relationship yet!), but every once a week he send you a bouquet of your favorite flowers (He asked you this when you two were on your first date). 

On your second date, Jason, who initiated everything, he researched the most favorite cafe to go on a date and made a list of what to do after that. He did bring you to your favorite book store and said he knew this information because he saw your Instagram story gushing over new books here. 

“ To be honest, I know that you like this place because I saw your IG story a week ago.”

“You remember that?” Y/N asked with a disbelief tone. It surprised you that this man remembered the nonsense IG story that you made sometimes.  

“..Shit, am I wrong? So, sorry I don't know if it made you uncomfortable.” he said. 

“No.., no, it is fine. It is just… No one besides my friends is paying attention to my nonsense IG story.” You said. 

“It is not nonsense, I think you are just being you and that’s cute.” You blushed at his words. Damn you Todd, she cursed in her heart. 

At the end of the date, Jason Todd took you to the front of your apartment and said that he is so happy to spend time with you and surprise-surprise he said…

“Hei, Y/N i.. uhh, i like the way our conversation goes from the first time we’ve chatted, and… uhh, can we take this to another level. i … I like you. a lot, actually. and this is my first time that i felt this. And.. I don't know what’s the best time to ask you to be my girlfriend? shit, is it too soon?”

You can’t help but giggle a bit, oh my why he is so cute. 

 “Jay…, I like you too.” You confessed to him.

“Really? But, I think I just did the bare minimum things the guy did. You deserve more than this. Okay, I will show you how a man should treat his partner  more than bare minimum.” 

From the moment he told you that, you two were in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. Every weekend he visits your apartment and bring your favorite snack and food, and snacks for Mr. Zach! The first time he visited your apartment, he even steals Mr. Zach attention with his charming smile. For your information, Mr. Zach is not like you, he is hard to impress by humans, but with Jason, everything seems easy for him. 

“Hello, who is this gentleman? Wow, he is so majestic.” Said Jason. 

“His name is Zach.. he is..” You are stunned a bit when Mr Zach is already on Jason’s lap purring over him. 

“Oh my God. he never does that to any stranger.”

“Well, I think Mr Zach approved of me as your boyfriend? Right, Mr. Zach?” Zach kept purring on his lap. 

If your cat approved of this man, how can you not melt on his hand then? You thought, you will fallin so hard to this man, and you don’t even know if you will recover if you two break up.

 True to his word, he always shows youi how much he care about this relationship. He posted about you on his instagram and never try to hide his relationship with you. he is fuckin smitten with you. When he is at your apartment he always listens to your rambling like…

“Guess what..” you said

“What is it babe?”

“You remember Samantha, the project manager that I told you about..”

“The girl you said is so useless and not very helping.”

“Yes….  Today someone found out  she is the mistress of our Art Director.” Jason gasped with an excited tone.

“No waaaaayyyy..”

“Yes waaaaaay.. I can't believe that the tea is boiling.” you chuckled. Jason smiles at you.

It feels so natural the way this dynamic with Jason, he always listens to what you say, he genuinely cares about you, and you just realize that this is how it feels to be loved by someone.

---- 

He likes to spoil you rotten, you are totally his queen and he doesn’t stop to show how much he loves you. Every little things he did always made you melt, like for example that time when the weather is getting cold, he always remind you to wear your jacket and when he pick you up from your office, he always make sure that you wear your jacket neatly so that you don’t get cool when he takes you on his motorbike. 

“Wait, let me fix your jacket first.” he said. 

“It is already good.”

“It doesn’t hurt to check again.” he smiled at you. Ugh, you love him so much. 

When you two are officially one year together, He asked you if you want to move in with him to this apartment that he newly bought. It’s an apartment with three bedrooms and one of the room he designed to be your mini library and cozy place to read with a big sofa on the corner. 

HONESTLY, YOU WANTED TO SCREAM AT THIS POINT, IS IT A DREAM? 

“You are lying right?” You asked with a disbelief tone. 

“No baby, it is the truth. I am so sorry if this is too sudden. I.. I just want to be with you and wake up next to you every single day of my life. But, if you are still not ready yet, it’s okay baby, you can just visit it whenever you like.” He said while caressing your face. Now, you are totally crying. 

“Oh my God, Jaybird you are totally peace of shit,” and then you kiss him and hug him. 

“Okay.. I will move in with you.” when he heard the yes, he is smililng widely and kiss her again. 

“Thank you, Y/N. Thank you for bring so much happiness to my life.”

“Jaybird, I love you too.”

[agent-44mc]

a mission of liberation. 1995. part one

Pairing: Winter Soldier x Red Guardian

Warnings: none, so far.

Summary: Four years after meeting the Winter Soldier, Alexi Shostakov finds himself face to face with the man he once knew. SHIELD assigns him the mission to find and liberate him.

Word Count: 1k

notes: I don’t know where exactly this is going, I usually don’t do this, but I’m so excited about this ship I had to do something. I'm shrugging right now but in a way that i definitely know instead of what the shrug implies. tee hee. because it's so clear they should fuck so it will happen, trust. also this is unedited. i don't have time for that.

┌── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──┐

Alexi had a good life, doing what he loved. A nice house, a dog, a job that he loved more than anything in the world, students that maybe hated him, even a potential girlfriend. Everyone knew him to be a kind spirit, maybe annoying at times with his loud personality, but after he walks through the doors of his beautiful house, feeds his dog, eats his homemade all american meal, and lays down to sleep in his goose feather bed, he thinks of someone he misses so dearly. 

Someone he knew as his best friend. 

And it didn’t feel good to think about him , like Alexi would die for it to be. His chest eroded anytime his existence was uttered by his subconscious while his mind was at rest. His “good life” kept the thoughts of him at bay, but every night, the guilt only made it worse. 

A smile shouldn’t haunt a man. Often, when the Red Guardian thought of the brutal brainwashing his lost friend had been subjected to, he couldn't help but think of his smile when he resisted it. 

The worst part, somehow, was that he didn’t even know his name. Neither of them did- but at least “The Coney Island Hero” wasn’t subjected to remembering that someone had given him that nickname. Alexi was left to suffer that. 

But there are many distractions from this- one being that he now leads a double life, working for SHIELD, doing hero-work, an umbrella term to describe anything from shutting down Nuclear Cold-War weapons and saving people from burning buildings- sometimes even cats. The bastardly things. 

Until one day, on a mission, he saw someone he’d been dreaming about. 

Alexi never went a day without seeing the shadow of The Coney Island Hero, which is why he almost brushed it aside, but then, he slapped him right in the face- which proved nothing. He was seeing The Winter Soldier now. The Shadow of The Coney Island Hero laid in him, even if he might not remember it. 

There’s one who does though, and Alexi knew that this time, he wasn’t going to lose him. He was going to liberate him, in a true American fashion.

 Brainwashing goes both ways. Alexi was going to brainwash the winter soldier back to the man he knew. The man that deserved to live a life free. 

And for reasons unknown to him, there was something deeper stirring under the surface of this fundamental belief. Something… personal. 

MISSION REPORT. 1995. 

“Get that crying baby out of here, I’m trying to talk to the woman,” Alexi ordered, slamming a fist on Peggy’s  desk with a scowl. “This is important, little girl!”

The baby mirrored his scowl. “I’m thwee,” she said, sticking out her tongue and holding her Dad’s hand a little tighter.

“You are a  very cute baby, I cannot stay angry for long,” Alexi gave in, waving as she walked out, grinning ear to ear at the sight. “Goodbye baby.”

Silence wavered between them as Alexi smiled silently, staking in the sights of the stuffy brown office that overlooked the streets of New York City, various noises fading into white noise as he let himself drift away to another place. It was subconscious at this point. 

Coney Island. He’d been there several times hoping to run into its hero. 

He stayed there until a British accent woke him back up. “Alexi, you came here very passionate about something, would you like to… elaborate further on what you saw?” 

“Uh, what?” Alexi stuttered, “oh, yes. The Winter Soldier. I saw him there, Agent Carter. I knew him, yes I knew him well. He liberated me.” 

“The Winter Soldier? He’s a myth.. An urban legend. What makes you think you know him?” Peggy inquirered, grabbing her reading glasses from the desk in front of her, holding her files out far enough to see. 

Alexi laughed. “You cannot fool me, Agent Carter. I know you know what you say isn’t true. You may be the supreme leader of SHIELD, but I was a supreme leader of the Red Room. I knew of the Winter Soldier. But then, I knew him. He didn’t know himself though.”

She looked at him through her glasses. “Alright, fine. He does exist. But you aren’t supposed to know that. It’s what we’d all like to keep a secret.” Peggy became somber, setting down her files. “What do you mean he didn’t know himself?” 

“I mean,” Alexi began. “We bonded. He got us French fries, we had jokes, and I tried to help him remember what his name was. The best he could do was Coney Island. That means he was the hero, no?” 

“The hero? I doubt he was ever a hero. I don’t know who-“

“But he doesn’t remember. He used to be someone! Someone who is no one wouldn’t remember Coney Island,” Alexi said in confidence, his eyes traveling to outside the window once more. “Even if he wasn’t, he deserves to live free.”

“You’re saying that the Winter Soldier was brainwashed?” Peggy asked, practically in disbelief as her soldiers squared, only slightly looking down at her feet when Alexi earnestly nodded his head. 

She got up and walked around the room, seemingly deep in thought about something, in such a manor that made him twist his fingers anxiously in wait for whatever she was going to say next. Perhaps “you’re crazy, we’re taking your job and your money.”  or worse, “there’s nothing we can do.”.

 Finally, she said, “Alexi, I’m giving  you a mission.”

Alexi shot up like lighting to his feet, turning around the face Peggy, who had her hands neatly clasped behind her back, a serious look of final determination on her aged face. 

“Yes ma’am?” Alexi asked, his heart practically breaking through his ribs. 

“Find and free The Winter Soldier.” 

[dollypopup]

"Colin should have grovelled more!" "Penelope folded too easily"

I think statements like this typically come from people who like Penelope. . .but don't really understand her. And don't really understand just why she cares for Colin, and just why him groveling would not in any way bring her peace.

Penelope and Colin are kindred spirits in their loneliness, in season 3 more than any others. Penelope had lost her friendship with Eloise, and Colin didn't really have a close friend circle to begin with. Except with Pen. Pen was the person he could put the mask down for, could open up to, (in particular with their 'dreams' discussion) and that's why he couldn't even entertain the idea of giving up talking to her in Season 2. She is a vital part of his life, and holds so much significance and importance to him.

I imagine that's what made their silence over his travels especially painful for him. They spent such a long time talking after Season 1, and he even informs her that her letters were so encouraging, that it helped him heal something inside of himself. That if she could see him in a gentle way. . .so could he. (And he repays this, because he is honest to god out here acting and looking at her like she hung the moon in the sky). But without her presence in his life, he spiraled. Didn't feel confident in being who he is, and thus put on his persona more firmly. We know this because he wrote in his journal that "I want to be less needy, less insecure, while still maintaining the core of my vulnerability that makes me who I am". That he misses his family, that he misses home.

And we know, from the books, that Home? Home is Penelope. Penelope is his North Star, is his guiding force, and who I argue he feels he needs. In his very first scene, he looks toward her house, tries to find her in the window. When he does not, he returns to his family. In the outdoor gathering, he looks for her and finds her, eager to talk. He states aloud that he misses her, and I imagine he wrote it, too. Not hearing back from her over the course of his travels was surely something that hurt him, but he doesn't hold any ill will toward her for it, only wants to reconnect again. In fact, the one and only time he brings up how he misses her and that she didn't respond, she makes very clear the reason why: she heard what he said and it hurt her. And he's ashamed of it.

Colin hears her call him cruel, and instead of ruffling his feathers about it, instead of getting upset, instead of having a chip on his shoulder as I feel so many men would about it. . .he understands why she does so.

Penelope is a woman who has been largely treated poorly in her society. She feels unheard, she feels undesired, and in her circumstances, and I can't help but ask myself. . .has anyone ever truly apologized to Penelope for hurting her, before? Her mother? Her sisters? Eloise, likely, but. . .anyone else? And the way Colin did? Because of all the characters in the show, Colin? Colin knows how to apologize. He has a lot of practice in it. And very importantly: Colin, a man of privilege in his society, apologizes. . .predominately to women. To Marina, to his mother, and multiple times to Penelope.

Ultimately, Penelope wants to be heard, Penelope wants to be understood, Penelope wants to feel desired.

And Colin checks every single one of those boxes. He informs he is not who he was before, and then he proves it to her. He hears that he hurt her, and he comments on it directly. An entire night apart, and he comes back to her 'Because I embarrass you' with 'I am most certainly not ashamed of you', replies to her 'I am a laughingstock' with 'you are clever, and warm, and I am proud to call you my good friend'. He hears her proclaim her own insecurities, and empathizes so deeply with her. He listens. He understands. He makes clear that he cares for her, and that she *is* desired. 'You lift my spirits' 'I seek you out at every social assembly'. That she helps him see the world in ways he loves, that he sees HER and how much she has cared for HIM, that she makes him feel appreciated, that he appreciates her, in turn.

And then? Then? He shows her. He tells her, and he shows her. His actions all throughout Season 3 reinforce this apology. He continues looking for her in every corner of every ballroom, he continues complimenting her, he laughs at her jokes and respects her boundaries, he is ever so gentle with her, he listens to her with an attentiveness that no one else has ever given her. To Lady Whistledown? Sure. But to Penelope? Who else in the entirety of that ton has listened to Penelope the way Colin has?

Absolutely no one.

Penelope Featherington ghosts Colin Bridgerton for months with no explanation, and Colin comes back wanting to reach out to her, and she finally tells him why.

And he apologizes. Because he listens. Really, truly listens. And really truly cares.

I need you to understand how rare that is, even nowadays, but especially back then. That Colin is the kind of man who can put his hurt to the side and realize he made a mistake, that he said something callous, and he adores her, and he can't lose her, and he has to see her and make it right.

Because that's why Penelope fell for Colin. Not because he's beautiful, not for his charm, not for his family. But for his heart. Because he shows her kindness in a world that so often disregards her. Because he seeks her out and tries to understand her, truly hears what she has to say and compliments her, says he's sorry and looks at things from her perspective.

Because he saw her when she was invisible.

Penelope Featherington, who grew up in a house that made cruel jabs at her, has Colin Bridgerton come to her and say he regrets what he said, and that he was wrong, and that he understands why she's mad at him. Penelope Featherington who has so rarely had much of anyone tell her that they're sorry for what they said about her, sits before Colin Bridgerton as he professes how much she means to him. That he cannot even spend a full day away from her knowing they're on bad terms with each other without making it right. That he sees how she is hurting and he has to in any way he can amend it. She is lonely, with no one really in her corner at the start of season 3, and she feels like she lost it all, and Colin comes to her and says 'no, I'm here and I appreciate you and you are special to me, please let me in and let me prove it'. Is it any wonder why after she shakes his hand, she stands in the sun, and she feels the warmth of it, she can smile? That she can breathe, again? That she can be truly content for the first time in the season?

Because Penelope Featherington does not want Colin to beg. She knows him. She knows the tender, full heart he hides behind the new cavalier persona. She knows the soft underbelly of Colin Bridgerton.

He never had to grovel. All he had to do was love her. Assuredly. Fervently. Loudly. Unapologetically.

And he does.

[thebestusernamepossible]

I’m mostly staying off the Mouthwashing fandom bc I personally don’t want to put myself through whatever discourse is ever going on there. But know I love Anya and Mouthwashing is one of the best games I’ve played that had an SA survivor AND was respectful about it!! The abuse Anya suffered is never portrayed as a spectical for the audience to leer at. They use the art of implication VERY well, and in the end Anya gets to go out dignified. She’s not just Jimmy’s tradgic victim, she’s her own character who makes her own decisions. Jimmy doesn’t get to kill her, she expresses her own agency to do so. She’s also the one who kept the gun away from him for so long. Also she’s SO fucking strong, she’s so cool. Anya I love you.

Also the game’s overarching (but subtle) commentary on rape culture, enabling, and how capitalism almost makes a set dressing for it is peak.

[florida3exclamationpoints]

.

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

"Two years. We are all here 🇺🇦"

[askshivanulegacy]

THIS. This is why your vote MATTERS.

There are bigger things at stake than your feelings over not having the perfect candidate.

You're not voting for a candidate. You're voting for a party, which is nothing but a TOOL to do things with. You're voting for the US, and you're not voting for anyone else.

Did you know?

Democrats have won the popular vote in seven out of the last eight presidential elections going back to 1992? The only time the GOP has won the popular vote in the last 36 years in a presidential election was in 2004, and it was a pretty narrow margin. This was a wartime election and the first election post-9/11. The Democratic candidate was the unfortunately uninspiring John Kerry, who had been lied about. You know how in politics we say someone has been "swiftboated" when a successful lie is told about them? That term originates with the 2004 election because a bunch of people concocted an elaborate lie about John Kerry's military service. He wasn't super inspiring as a candidate, but that was the worst thing he did. He wasn't a bad guy. He was just running in a very gross, jingoistic time after the worst terror attack in American history, and had a bunch of successful lies told about him to the point where a whole word about a specific kind of lie was invented about it. THIS is the only time since 1988 that the Republican party has won the popular vote. George W. Bush did not win the popular vote in 2000. The Supreme Court ordered that votes stop being counted in Florida and handed the victory to Bush.

Donald Trump has never ever won the popular vote. The electoral college handed him the victory in 2016, less than 15,000 votes across three states decided the election. Hillary Clinton in total won about 3.7 million more votes than Donald Trump. Trump HATES hearing this number. He hates even more that Joe Biden got about 7 million more votes. He hates even more that you bring up the fact that he lost his midterm elections for his party in 2018, badly. And that the "Red Wave" in 2022 did not happen because of backlash at his Supreme Court. Or that in 2023 voters continued to reject his Supreme Court at the polls.

He knows, the Republicans know, that if more people vote, they lose. They don't want small d democracy. They want authoritarianism. They want to suppress it.

So when you get cute about not wanting to vote, you're not doing activism. You're surrendering.

[chronicbitchsyndrome]

i have been in community with profoundly developmentally disabled peers and peers with brain damage my whole life, bc i had a childhood diagnosis. i have also been leftist my whole life; my mother was a marxist and raised me that way, and while their politics were absolute dogshit, they were lefty dogshit.

my entire life, i have seen leftist educators throw mentally disabled people away as "lost causes" because they couldn't engage with the material the way it was being presented. leftist outreach and education does, genuinely, have a massive lack of accessible material. to be blunt, people are not interested in retrofitting their leftist outreach to be accessible to people who learn best through episodes of sesame street.

as in, i have repeatedly faced outright laughter and cruelty over the idea that this could be a priority. or even something that we consider doing at all.

"people who are that mentally disabled don't need to know about these things," the kindest interpretation goes. ("people who are that mentally disabled don't interact with the world, anyway, they're all in institutions or monitored 24/7 by their parents," the uncharitable underlying assumptions go. "they wouldn't be a worker who needs a union. or a library attendee. or a member of the community garden. or a volunteer at the food bank. or or or")

the people i have seen this hurt the worst, over and over again, are profoundly mentally disabled people of color whose lack of access to accessible antiracist education is causing real danger in their lives. institutionalized disabled people of color who have learned racist ideology and behaviors from white authority, whether they were adopted by white families or incarcerated in care institutions run by white staff. who are treated lower than garbage by leftist educators, who view them as "lost causes," as unworthy of time and effort and attention, as deserving of their abuses because they... what... internalized the abuses that make up every aspect of their lives since birth?

i see people saying things in this conversation like "disability isn't an excuse for racism or transphobia or whatever, people have the obligation to improve themselves." oh, believe me, i have seen again and again how many privileged disabled people utilize their disabilities to punch down on others, try to escape accountability for their punching down by citing disability. but individual weaponization of identity is just that: weaponization of identity.

the power structures at play are what they are. it is a noble and admirable goal to want leftist outreach and education to be more accessible to all. if that is truly your goal, you must eventually reckon with the existence of people who do, actually, really need it presented in a picture book. or an episode of bluey. or a conversation where you only use examples of people they know in real life, using things that happened to them personally. the existence of people who cannot grasp forms of abstract reasoning, who need information presented as rules, or as guidelines, or as categories. the idea that yes, fully grown adults who need daniel tiger to explain racism to them are human beings who not only deserve access to that very thing, but who also deserve to be a part of leftist spaces and benefit from leftist organizing. are people for whom it might be INTEGRAL they get to be a part of leftism. are victims of racism themselves and suffering without access to antiracist spaces and community and support.

and you will need to reckon with the abject cruelty of your peers who laugh and mock the very idea of this. you need to reckon with the fact that a lot of people you respect, a lot of leftists doing genuinely good work, will respond to this by making fun of the people you're serving, even outright telling you their violent fantasies about these people. that is the experience of organizing in leftist spaces for profoundly disabled people. that is why so many of us burn out so fast. there IS a structural problem with mentally disabled people being seen as disposable and not a part of community. and it is EXTREMELY present in leftist organizing and outreach efforts.

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[tonycries]

A ranking of JJK men from best to worst during your period (absolutely no one asked for this):

Nanami - Are you kidding me? In what world would this perfect husband NOT be number one?? Doesn't even need that lil' app on his phone to track your periods, bro remembers. He has it mapped out in his brain AND on his calendar. You don't even have to tell him when it starts, he'll be home with chocolates, your fav movies, and enough heating pads to last a lifetime going, "Hi, my love, I hope m'not too early but I got you these." He's never too early. Never.

Geto - Bro has been through the whole process twice already with his daughters. He KNOWS exactly what's going down when you get just a lil' too sensitive, when your cravings become just a tad sweeter. Would lay you down and give you the most soothing massages whispering about how it'll "all be over soon" and "his girl can tough it out." 10/10 is so patient, even has a period tracker on his phone.

Choso - Y'know he's a lil' confused but he's got the spirit. Curses don't have periods so trust he'll be MAD confused wondering whether you've somehow developed the same jujutsu technique as him. When you teach him though, he's gonna be the sweetest babygirl. Let's you cuddle and use him all you want, throw him around to your hearts content until you have the perfect pillow!! Only minus points would be for that little intrusive thought in his brain that just wants to.....experiment......with his technique....

Gojo - Now, you'd be confused about who has the period - you or HIM? Which, honestly if distraction is your go-to then it works out pretty well. Every cramp you get, Gojo just hates to see his pretty baby in pain, so he'd be crying out. He'd be right there moaning and groaning along with you until you're crying tears of laughter because what the fuck?? Extra points because he's a sweet connoisseur and knows ALL the best places to get you everything you want. Trust, bro doesn't skimp out either he'd be diving IN to that Gojo Estate old money just to get you more than everything you need. Much more.

Toji - Now, hear me out it's not that man doesn't know what to do. It's just that he doesn't want to. Not to bully his cute girl, but does he really have to get out of bed and walk the treacherous block down to the convenience store to get you extra pads? Really? He'd much rather stay in bed cuddling you and kissing every inch of your face he could reach - seriously, his old bones are creaking at the very thought of moving. But, eventually, when you do bribe him with a dollar convince him to go, he'd be pampering you and more with your own money.

Sukuna - Bro definitely tells you to "just suck it back in wtf." -3878473 aura for him, but at least Uraume is on your side and gives him a good whack to the head. When he realizes a bit tho would be a bit softer than usual, at least he'll stop calling you his usual names after your sensitive self tears up at them. Mhm, definitely take him to try out a cramp simulator, though he deserves it.