#but yeah. i want closeness. i'd prefer it if it wasn't romantic but like. i just wanna be someone's number 1 who's my number 1

[ikeberry]

daily affirmation of the fact that i have in fact experienced romantic attraction (in a prophecy) and Know for a fact that i am aro (god knew i hated it and saved me from experiencing that hell ever again) even though i crave intimacy and close relationships (we live in amatonormativy, boo) it can be whatever the fuck i want it to be (qpr, romantic, platonic, unlabeled, it's up to me and whoever) !!!

[barcaatthemoon]

serial heartbreaker ii || alexia putellas x reader ||

whether it was intentional or not, there was definitely something going on between you and alexia.

part i

you woke up in a bed that definitely wasn't yours. the sheets were by far the softest that you had ever felt in your entire life, but the mattress itself was firmer than you preferred. groaning a little, you turned onto your stomach and pulled a blanket up over your head. almost immediately, you were hit a wave of perfume that definitely wasn't yours.

confused, you lifted your head up to see that you were not in your bedroom. suddenly, you were hit with the memories of what had happened the night prior. anger and sadness threatened to wash over you, only held back by a feeling of optimism. yes, you and leila were definitely over, but there was definitely room for something between you and alexia.

it was stupid to be thinking about getting in a reltionship so soon after your last one had officially ended, but you couldn't help it. you hated being single, something that most of your friends knew already. besides, you'd be a liar if you said that you weren't interested in alexia. she was alexia fucking putellas after all.

"buenos dias," alexia said as she climbed back into bed with you. you could smell coffee, a cup held by the hand that wasn't gently shaking you awake. alexia had heard you moving around, so she knew that you weren't fully asleep. "(y/n), it's time for you to wake up. come on, it's almost two."

"in the afternoon?" you lifted your head a little to see her nod. you shot up, nearly knocking into alexia as you did. she chuckled, smiling as she watched you try to blink away your tiredness. "you let me sleep until two in the afternoon?"

"you had a rough night, and a rather fitful sleep. i wanted to make sure that you were rested today. now, we can stay in bed all day if you'd like today, but tomorrow, we have plans," alexia told you.

"oh, and what would those be?" you asked.

"mapi wants everyone to go to the beach," alexia said. you liked the sound of that, not having gotten to hang out at the beach with your friends in quite a while. "so, what do you want to do today?"

"first, i'd like to drink that coffee," you said as you reached for the cup. alexia handed it to you, rolling her eyes at your little grabby hand motion. you leaned into her side as you sipped on the coffee, both of you discussing some lunch plans. alexia ordered some food in, promising that you didn't have to leave her bed until tomorrow.

…

"hello gorgeous!" mapi exclaimed as she pulled you in for a hug. you laughed as she dragged you down onto the sand, the two of you rolling around a little. you were careful of her knee, much more careful than she was. behind the two of you, ingrid and alexia set up a little area to relax for a bit.

"she looks happy, considering," ingrid said as she watched you run around with mapi. "is she still staying with you?"

"yeah, we didn't leave my bed at all yesterday. i haven't had a lazy day like that in forever," alexia said. she ignored the look on ingrid's face, a question she didn't dare ask her captain about you just yet. that was the sort of thing mapi would have done for her. it wasn't that ingrid was shy, but she had a bit more respect for alexia's boundaries than mapi did.

"i didn't know the two of you were that close," ingrid said. it felt like a safe option, something that could be expanded on in whatever way alexia felt comfortable. that was the sort of thing that ingrid had learned at her time in barcelona. it was tricky to navigate certain conversations and topics with alexia, you being one of them.

"she's easy to be close with. there's something about her, it puts me at ease," alexia said. mapi had mentioned alexia possibly having a crush on you. she had definitely joked about alexia getting jealous whenever leila started talking to you romantically. however, the captain had brushed all of it all, denying it all vehemently.

"well, whatever happens, i wish you good luck," ingrid said. alexia blushed as she turned away from ingrid, who was smirking at her with a knowing look. mapi liked to say a lot just to get a rise out of alexia, but it seemed that the defender hadn't been inaccurate with her comments about alexia having feelings for you.

…

"when are you going to make a move on ale?" ona asked as she sat down next to you on alexia's couch. she was staring at you expectantly, like she already knew your feelings. it wasn't that hard of a conclusion to come to, most of the locker room had figured it out already. since your breakup with leila, you had spent maybe a total of four days at your own apartment in the span of a month.

"ona, shut up," you hissed. alexia was in the kitchen, chatting away to her mother on the phone. ona laughed at the look of pure panic on your face.

"hey, i'm happy for you. lucy won't admit it, but she's looking forward to double dates. all you have to do is say something. ale likes you too, she's letting you practically live here already," ona pointed out. you blushed as you realized that ona had no idea that you'd been sleeping in alexia's bed with her at night.

it seemed that your first night here had set the tone for the rest of your extended stay. alexia had you going to bed about three hours earlier than what you were used to, but you didn't mind it. she'd get ready for bed with you, let you sleep in her clothes at night, and hold you until she had to wake you up for training. it was nice, something that you hadn't gotten even whenever leila was still at the same club as you.

"i don't know if i'm ready for a relationship, and you don't even know if alexia likes me," you told ona. she rolled her eyes, scoffing at your statement. a part of her was proud of you for not rushing in, but alexia definitely had a thing for you.

"well, don't let her pass you by. i'm sure that ale won't stay single forever," ona warned you. the thought had crossed your mind, but you always tried to ignore it. if you thought too much about alexia getting another girlfriend, someone to take your spot in her bed, you always got sick.

"lo siento-," alexia sat down on the other side of you, her hand landing directly on your thigh, "-what are we watching?"

"it is your tv," you said nervously. alexia gave you a look, knowing that you had been monopolizing control over her remote while you'd been over. alexia had opted for watching matches on an ipad while you flipped from tv to tv show.

"hmm, i almost forgot," alexia joked. you rolled your eyes as you forced yourself to look away from her. alexia squeezed your thigh as she reached forward and grabbed the remote. she put on some old game footage, ona groaning and getting up to leave.

"i will see you both later. bye cari." ona pressed a kiss to the top of your head. alexia retracted her hand at the little token of affection. you frowned as she did, immediately reaching out to take her hand in yours. alexia smiled down at the two of your hands. she missed the look that ona shot the two of you as she put her shoes on. "remember to use protection!"

"ona!" you yelled as you twisted to throw something at her. the smaller woman was already out of alexia's apartment, leaving you to sit there awkwardly. "i'm sorry about her, she's being ridiculous."

"she is right, protection is important," alexia said. you laughed as you settled back on the couch with her. "you have been spending a lot of time in my bed, so i guess it's not a terrible conversation to be having."

"alexia, we aren't fucking each other," you reminded her. alexia let her hand fall away from yours. you didn't notice, but she watched as you frowned again, this time not reaching out for her.

"you want us to be, though, don't you?" alexia asked you.

"no," you answered confidently. alexia's face fell, having been certain that you liked her. "i am not good at casual sex, and i don't see the point of trying to be now."

"so… you want something more?" alexia asked.

"i want to be with someone who will love me," you said. alexia perked up a little, turning her body towards yours. "i'd like someone who cares for me like you do."

"i can do you one better," alexia said. she gently cupped your cheeks as she leaned forward. you felt her nose brush against your face. it drove you a little crazy having her so close, but purposefully not kissing you. "what if i love you? would that be okay?"

"just promise me that you won't break my heart, please." you sounded dangerously close to begging, something that you hated.

"i could never," alexia promised you. you leaned in to close the distance, letting out a sigh as alexia kissed you back. you melted into her arms, finally getting to do something that you had been wanting to for so long. a part of you felt like it should have happened earlier, but you had always needed a little outside help to make any sort of move.

[always-and-forever-alone]

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[ABC HEADCANONS]

[Sdv shane x reader]

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TW: [nsfw, mdni,]

I have dyslexia

[I thought doing some of these would be fun! I know i said I was gonna post on the 15, but who cares]

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A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

The first few times, I think he'd be a little rusty, but he would try to have good aftercare because he thinks you deserve the world and doesn't want to lose you.

After a while, he'd figure out what's best for both of you and be pretty chill, but not in a way that makes it seem like he doesn't care. More like it isn't doing too much.

–

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

His favorite body part that is his own is probably, hair(on his scalp). Which isn't a body part, but is a part of his body, so...... I think it just looks good and he likes that.

His favorite body parts of you are your eyes and your legs, They are probably pretty strong because you constantly work on the farm. And people's eyes Are always pretty :) I mean just look at you

–

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

I think he'd get (more) turned on if you cum, especially if he's the reason.

–

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He's always found you hot, like the moments he saw you. He had to make himself mean, like when you guys first met, he wanted to talk and became friends. But in his eyes, there's no way you'd like him so he pushed you away.

–

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

Yeah, I'd imagine in high school, he was more "hot" (he is still hot) and got more girls, he probably wasn't so depressed. I think he'd be good at flirting if he wasn't so nervous. Because the idea of flirting makes him flustered and nervous.

–

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He's a sleeping person; with that, I think he'd like any position that would let him kinda lay down or be close because he loves being close.

But if he's jealous or there's a special event, I think he'll put a lot more effort

–

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Serious, can't convince me otherwise

–

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He probably cleans up nice for the first 3 times, but then after that, he worries less. But he's overall a clean person. And if you don't like it, he'll shave; he doesn't care. Yes the carpet matches the drapes

–

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

I feel like he'd be really sweet, and romantic. Sometimes, he's the couple opposite; it depends. But that doesn't mean he's not rough.

–

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Before you guys dated, he would do it more, and he'd always have to push the image of you out of his mind. Because he felt guilty and like he was disrespecting you.

When you guys move in, he still does it a little bit, just because you're busy a good amount of the time, but he doesn't feel so bad using your image to help. And he doesn't need to most days because you're around enough

–

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Free use maybe

Him being dominant (idk how to spell)

I really idk:( sorry

–

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Bed/couch

If he is desperate then anywhere on the farm is free game

–

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You. You being turned on.

I feel like if he's stressed it might make him want to.

Or if you put extra effort into your appearance, a part of him wants to mess it up, but no matter what you're Pretty/handsome to him.

–

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Hurting you, you could ask over and over and I don't think he'd do it. He doesn't want to hurt you.

He'd checks before and after to make sure you're good.

–

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He wouldn't be bad at it. I do think he could be a mucher. He'd like to get oral more but does want you to feel good, so he'd want to give in that sense.

–

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Rough and sensual, he likes it rough but also wants love to still be there. Don't get me wrong tho, if you want hard he'll go hard

–

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Could never replace the really thing, but definitely loves them.

–

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He's a private guy, but I feel like he'd get a kick out of whispering things to you in public or giving you hickeys that are hard to hide.

–

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

3 at most, very rare. Usually, 1 or maybe 2 for him, but I will try to get you to have more, using what he needs because he wants you to enjoy it.

I feel like he could last long, 30-40m, the key word being could. Usually, he's done within 15 or 20.

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T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Doesn't have any

Not for him

Will if you want him to

–

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

75% tease 25% praising. He likes to tease and see how you react. I feel like that would also trun him on.

–

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Not much, but definitely groans close to the end.

–

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He kinda likes it when you pull his hair

–

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

I'd say like, 6.5

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Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Its up there. like 3-5 times a week. Your just so good looking

He is pretty flexible and will do what you want for that; worst-case scenario, he goes solo.

–

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

One round he's a little sleepy

Two wants to sleep

Anything over 3 and he's out

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Hope you guys enjoyed this, have a good day

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[xxlady-lunaxx]

I love you; I don't | {SaneGiyuu}

Theme: Angst? It's not bad but there's no fluff lmfao

Note: Spoilers<33

A little UzuRen mention

Idk but when I tell people my oneshot ideas somehow they always make me get angst ideas from what they say abt it, my sister told me i should end this in angst 🫡

btw the part 2:

part 2

×××

"Tomioka."

Giyuu turned at his name, tilting his head at the Wind Hashira who stood there, his arms cross and eyes averted.

"Yes?" 

Sanemi bit his lip, as if contemplating his life choices. "I like you. Romantically."

Giyuu gave a start, his eyes widening and cheeks flushing. "What?!"

"That's what I said," Sanemi snapped, embarrassed. He looked up, glaring at Giyuu through his bangs. "Do... you want to go out??"

"I... I-" Giyuu was at loss for words and his mouth opened and closed several times.

"Take your time," Sanemi said, rolling his eyes.

Giyuu looked down. He wanted to say yes, really, he did. But. But, if he dated Sanemi, he would end up losing him. It wasn't like he could protect Sanemi—one, Sanemi was at the same level (if maybe less or more) of strength as him, and two, he would never let himself be protected, really. Which just increased the chance of losing him, paired with the fact that they were both Hashira and were always sent on missions that were considerably harder. Dating Sanemi would only make Giyuu grow fonder and closer to him, which would make the loss... a thousand times more devestating. So...

"I'm... sorry, Shinazugawa," Giyuu whispered. "I... can't."

Sanemi blinked, speechless for a second, before nodding rapidly. "It's fine. Alright. See you around." Then he turned and seemingly disappeared.

Giyuu sighed, raking a hand through his hair. He felt bad but... he'd feel worse if he lost Sanemi. Which was practically destined to happen if he had accepted, given his luck. People seemed to die away like flower petals on a picked rose when they got close to Giyuu.

×××

"I don't fucking know! It's like... I was getting mixed signals, it's just... Fuck," Sanemi groaned, banging his head on the table. "But he said no. And now there's not fucking way I can show my face to him again."

Obanai sighed. "We should go somewhere else, people are staring," he said. 

"Right..." Sanemi grumbled, standing. "Let's go to an ocean so I can drown myself."

Obanai rolled his eyes and stood, grabbing Sanemi by the wrist and pulling him down a road. "Walk, bitch. We'll go find a place we can train so you can let off some steam."

"Mm."

After Sanemi got ahold of himself, the two walked down the path side by side in silence. Obanai spoke up after a couple minutes.

"Just forget about Tomioka. It won't happen in a flash but... try? If he said no he probably means no and he's just stupid for acting like he likes you then rejecting you. For all we know he might not be into men. I don't know, just try leveling your own feelings with his and see what you can get from it. But... yeah, I would ignore Tomioka too," Obanai said, glancing at Sanemi. "It's not like you two talk much in the first place, so it'll be fine."

Sanemi rolled his eyes. "Comforting. But, I guess. I'd prefer just to not think about him, to be honest."

"That too," the ravenette said, nodding. "Anyways, relationship are tedious things when you're a Hashira. Or just in the Demon Slayer Corps, period."

"Mm. And yet we have Uzui—in the Demon Slayer Corps, a Hashira—somehow married. To three people. And you can't convince me otherwise that he doesn't have his eyes set on Rengoku too," Sanemi said, scoffing.

Obanai laughed. "He's just built like that. The little fuck is more interested in romance than saving people's lives."

"Eh, wouldn't we be too if demons didn't exist?" Sanemi asked, crossing his arms. 

"Fair point. Or not. I don't know if I'd exist if demons didnt," Obanai murmured thoughtfully.

"The hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing."

"...Right."

"...Back to Tomioka," Obanai said, quickening his pace.

"No, not back to him. There should be a clearing up ahead, wanna spar?" Sanemi offered, unsheathing his katana.

"Bet. Loser has to buy the other something?" Obanai proposed, grinning. 

"Count your money, I want ohagi," Sanemi said, racing ahead of him.

"HEY-"

×××

Years had past—yes, years—and Muzan was killed and Hashira were lost. Amongst the living Hashira were Giyuu and Sanemi. Tengen, as well, although he had retired a couple months before. And now that there was no obvious constant threat on their lives, they could live more freely, think more freely.

Paired with the knowledge of when they would die, Giyuu felt as if he could act upon whatever he wanted to. Befriend whom he liked, grow closer to those he wanted to. Somehow, throughout the years, he had loved Sanemi all the same. The feeling had wavered sometimes, but would come back in full bloom only a few weeks later. Since he no longer felt as if he would lose someone immediately because of himself, he decided to tell Sanemi of this. 

So, one day, he sent a crow to Sanemi, asking if they could meet together, maybe eat lunch. The letter was messily written as his dominant(is he right-handed?) hand was gone, but he hoped that Sanemi would be able to read it alright.

Luckily, he seemed to have been able to, as he arrived at noon at the park Giyuu had invited him to. The two had both brought their own lunches and quickly found a place to sit and eat. It was quiet for a moment as the two got their bearings together. The weather was nice, warm with a light breeze, and there was a soft scent of sakura flowers in the air.

Giyuu ate clumsily, not yet used to using his left hand as he struggled with his chopsticks.

Sanemi tilted his head towards him, an amused smirk growing on his face. "You eat messier than Rengoku."

Giyuu huffed. "I'm trying!"

"Mhm. What did you me to come here for? Just to eat?" Sanemi asked, putting down his chopsticks. 

"Ah. You know when... you said that you liked me?" Giyuu said hesitantly.

"Well fuck, going right in. Yes. I don't want to remember that," Sanemi said pointedly, sighing. 

Giyuu gave him a small, lopsided smile. "Alright. Well, I told you 'no,' not because I didn't like you, but because I didn't want to lose you. You understand, yes? I'm sorry... for that. And for not explaining. I just... panicked. I didn't want to risk losing you, then blaming myself forever," he murmured. 

Sanemi stared at him. "That's... Fuck you," he said, grumbling. 

Giyuu sighed. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you telling me this now, though??" Sanemi asked, raising an eyebrow. "It's really out of the blue."

"Ah... About that," Giyuu said, his voice lowering. "So..."

"Hm?"

"About what I said, that I said no, not because I disliked you? Well. Well, I did like you. I... do," Giyuu mumbled. "I like you." He cast his eyes down as he waited for a response. When he didn't get any, he looked back up at Sanemi.

Sanemi looked hesitant, his eyes down at his food on his lap. 

"What's wrong?" Giyuu asked curiously.

"I just..." He trailed off, his eyes meeting Giyuu's. "I don't like you like that anymore. I stopped, after a while. I figured I had no chance, so..."

Giyuu blinked. God. Of course. He should've expected this. "Oh."

"Sorry," Sanemi murmured. 

Giyuu shook his head, forcing a smile. "No, no, like you said before, it's alright. It's fine. You don't have to apologize, it's completely my fault. Uhm... I have to go now, I just remembered I promised to meet Tanjiro later, see you around..." he said, fumbling with his food and standing, quickly rushing off.

"TOMIOKA-" Sanemi shouted, his food falling to the floor as he stood.

Giyuu didn't look back, pressing a hand to his mouth to stop a sob that threatened to spill out. He should've expected this. There was no way in hell Sanemi would've stayed in love after years, it was a miracle he'd loved him in the first place. Of course.

×××

« Word count: 1380 »

[lunabug2004]

You said that according to you there is a way to make Mileven stay together and have all the characters have a good arc at the end of the show. Could you develop that? cause in my opinion if Mike's arc is about falling in love , changing his personality after meeting a girl and at the end being the protective paladin to "fix" his bad behaviour then it's really bad writing (coming from a straight person)

I'm going to be completely honest here, which I hope is what you want lol, I do think I say this (sans the "good arcs" part bc I don't think I've ever said that there's a way to make Mileven happen where all the characters have good arcs) to more-or-less make myself feel better bc I have so much Byler doubt (& Mike love) so yeah, take this as you will, this is just what my brain has come up with as an arc(?) I could mostly cope with. I mean, there's a reason I put "(mostly) happy" but yes, I'll try to expand.

I love Mike and I have a feeling I will continue to love Mike whether Mileven or Byler is endgame. This is purely because I do not believe Mike is a bad person or bad character just bc he's made some bad decisions/said some things he (canonically) regrets. I don't think Mike would be a protective paladin to simply "fix" his "bad behavior". While I do agree that this wouldn't be the best writing choice, I think, in-context, he would be trying his best to keep everyone he loves alive. He is an extremely traumatized teenage boy whose biggest fear is losing those he loves. He has been smack-dab in the middle of the action until s4. Finn Wolfhard himself has said Mike is depressed and pushing everyone away bc of it.

Anyways, all of this to say that I don't think it'd be too farfetched to say all of his "bad behavior" is simply untreated trauma symptoms. And yes, you could say something about other characters being traumatized and them not acting like Mike, but trauma, and this is a fact, effects everyone differently. One person may lean into their life before going through said trauma, like Will in s3, while another may block it out, like it's shown with El in s4, and another may completely change themselves while being stuck in a loop of wanting those he loves close to him but also wanting to keep them at a distance bc he is so terrified of losing them. Dr. Owens even says in s2 that a sign of PTSD is change in personality and lashing out, which we see both in Mike. Plus all the parallels bt him and Max in s4, it's safe to say this boy is struggling mentally.

I do think it would make sense, when we finally get Mike's POV in s5, for a lot of his controversial moments to be fueled by his mental health struggle. Now, do I think this is an excuse? Not necessarily, but it does make sense, and as far as I know, anytime Mike's actively made anyone upset he's apologetic (like I said earlier, lashing out). I believe that if the show solely focuses on Mike's mental health issues, then Mileven wouldn't be out of the question.

I do want to add that this is not how I want the story to go, I would much rather his story go the Byler route, but I've said before that his character is not solely dependent on either Byler or Mileven, and I still stand by that. He should not simply be seen as a 'romantic interest' character bc he is more than that and he has his own problems (that we aren't necessarily shown) that have nothing to do with who he's in a romantic relationship with.

Now, again, this is probably mostly just something I've convinced myself I'd be alright with, but I am aware that this in and of itself would be boring and not very good writing. I also do not know, in this case, what would happen on the Byler side of things, this why I say "(mostly)". I am fully a Byler shipper and would prefer Byler endgame to anything really, but I'm a Mike-stan first and foremost.

Sorry if this wasn't too clear, I feel like I just rambled and repeated myself a lot. Thanks for the ask, though! And pls if you or anyone else has questions about anything I said, pls ask me! Trust me, I know this isn't foolproof and I'm probably just dumb 😂

TLDR: I think it's possible they could go more towards untreated PTSD and trauma/mental health related route for Mike in a way that would make Mileven possible. Doesn't mean I'd think it's necessarily good writing, but I could see it going that way.

[chvoswxtch]

Hiii

ik your requests are closed but if you have time n feel up to it, could you write a fic, blurb or even just head canons about how Frank would celebrate you and your birthday? Hes seems like the “anything you want is yours” kinda guy, even if it’s getting coffee then spending the day at home he would still make it special. Its my birthday haha and i dont want a big celebration just a low key day doing little things i love with the ppl i love. Omg this is sappy hahah but yeah if you have the time, thank you!! And I totally understand if you dont ❤️❤️

-Max 💥

OMG ANGEL

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAX !!! ❤️

my fic requests are currently closed, but i'd be more than happy to whip you up a little birthday treat! i'm gonna go with a headcannon if that's okay bc I have a lot of thoughts about frankie & birthdays I don't think I can properly translate into a blurb right now so please find my rambling below the cut :)

frank castle & your birthday

frankie strikes me as someone that is a hopeless romantic at heart, and I feel like his love language is physical touch but also acts of service. I think we've seen that he pays a huge attention to detail, so he might not go like all out for your birthday, especially if he knows you prefer something small and intimate, but he would definitely make sure it felt special

he would probably start by taking you to your favorite coffee shop, getting you a little birthday breakfast treat with your coffee, and it would probably be the one time he doesn't criticize your drink order (he definitely thinks plain black coffee is real coffee) or comment on how much espresso you added to it (i'm on that pedro pascal shit myself, & I know the only time frankie wouldn't give me shit about it is my birthday bc he's legally required to be extra nice that day)

"you're gonna be hoppin' around like the goddamn energizer bunny with all that. it's your day though. get what you want, sweetheart."

he would insist that you sit down at one of the cute little tables so you can enjoy your coffee and little breakfast together, while you try to get hints from him about what he has planned (he'd resist as long as he could but it's really hard for him to say no to you)

I could see him taking you to do something that you had been begging him to do for awhile. something he kept putting off, or there wasn't time, or he acted like he didn't wanna go, but really he was just saving it for your special day. maybe a trip to an art museum, the aquarium, some botanical gardens, or the zoo even

or maybe a romantic stroll through central park. he'd bring a blanket and your favorite book, let you cuddle up in his lap as he read to you, play with your hair and point out all the cute dogs you saw to each other

even though he'd already gotten your birthday gifts weeks ago, he'd take you to your favorite store and let you pick out anything you wanted

"what? i'm not allowed to spoil my girl on her birthday? if that's a crime, it sure ain't the worst one i've ever committed."

as far as the evening, I see it going two ways: frankie either makes a reservation at your favorite restaurant and invites your closest friends and family to keep it intimate, or he surprises you with a special dinner he cooked himself (your favorite meal) along with a homemade birthday cake (it might not be the prettiest, but it would be delicious) because we know frankie can throw down in the kitchen

if you went out for dinner, he would insist on giving you your gifts & card at home because they're special and sentimental and he's shy when it comes to things like that, and he likes it better when those moments just consist of the two of you

if you had dinner at home, he would roll his eyes when you begged him to sing you happy birthday, but he would oblige because he can't tell you no

"alright, fine. but you're patchin' up your own ears when they start bleedin'. you know I can't sing for shit."

he would ask you several times throughout the day if you were having a good birthday, because he wants to make sure that you are because he thinks you deserve nothing less than as close to perfection as he can provide

he'd also continuously tell you how pretty he thought you were and how much he loved you and how lucky he felt to get to spend your special day with you

I could see him putting your favorite song on and asking you to slow dance with him in the living room to it, drawing out every single minute of your birthday all the way up to 11:59 and making sure you spent every second of it feeling loved and special

"today's one of my favorite days. know why? cause it was the day you were brought into this world, and I think that deserves a goddamn celebration. happy birthday, sweetheart. I love you."

[mouwrites]

uh hello- I'm nervous as I'm not used to this since I usually just read your stuff without suggesting things! Congrats on 100 followers, you deserve more tbh. I saw your matchup post! For the fandom it's ninjago, my gender preferance is uh... idk? I use she/them pronouns tho. Idm if it's platonic or romantic but I'm lonely irl so I would prefer romantic! I like kids cartoons and I'm pretty energetic and bubbly but uh- very shy and I get nervous very easily (if this wasn't an indicator) okay tysm! congrats on the followers (again lol)

Thank you for your kind words!! Now onto the matchmaking… I match you (romantically) with:

Jay Walker!!

Some headcanons!

You guys totally geek out together all the time

He loves being able to talk about his interests with you

And he loves hearing about your interests

He also appreciates that you can match his energy level with your bubbly personality

Most people have trouble keeping up with you guys

You’re just on your own wavelength

On that note, you guys have SO MANY inside jokes and little references

Sometimes it’s like you’re speaking a different language

You both enjoy the confused looks you get almost as much as you enjoy making the references

You just get each other so perfectly,, you definitely call each other “my other half”

You can frequently be found just talking to each other, all alone, in your own little world

He totally relates to your anxiety; though his is less social, so he has no problem fronting for you in public

Actually, he enjoys it

He gets to be your knight in shining armor :)

He’s very protective of you because of your shyness

It makes him anxious to see you alone in a crowd, so he always tries to keep physical contact in public

Hand holding or pinky locking are his go-tos, but he’s not against putting an arm around your shoulder or waist

This is also how he shows that you’re together

It’s less of a gesture he does out of jealousy, more of something he does to say “hey, I’m with her”

He doesn’t really get jealous over you

He knows that you’re his and he’s yours, that’s all he needs

A little Drabble!

You perked up when Jay walked in, sending a beaming smile his way.

“Hi!! And what are you up to, beautiful?”

You felt your cheeks go a little pink. “Uh, nothing.”

“Are you watching something?”

“Yeah… it’s a kids show,” you said quickly, trying to dismiss him as you half-closed your computer on your lap.

“Cartoons?”

“Yes. But how was your d—”

Before you could finish your statement, Jay dived onto the bed and propped himself up on his elbows next to you. He looked up at you with sparkling eyes; it was a look that he always got when he was excited about something. “Can I watch too?”

You blinked at him, your own eyes wide as an owl’s. “Do you really want to?”

“Obviously!! I freaking love cartoons. And what better way to watch than with my other half?”

A rosy-cheeked smile found your face. “Okay then.”

Jay scooted closer, draping an arm around you and bringing your head against his chest. You nuzzled into him, pressing play on your laptop and watching the cartoon with a newfound giddiness.

And a song!

Meteor Shower (Cavetown)

meteor shower! quick, take cover

But the hues in our hair compliment one another

I'd sell my own bones for sapphire stones

'Cause blue's your favorite color

…

My heart and the earth share the same rule

It starts with love and it ends with you

But don't go outside, it's dangerous tonight

Without me right here by your side

I hope you like this!! This is my first ever matchup hehe ^^ but thank you for your support, I can’t tell you how much you mean to me!

(divider by saradika)

[somethingclevermahogony]

OC Questionnaire

Thank you for the tags @winterandwords, @paeliae-occasionally, @pluppsauthor, @tildeathiwillwrite

I'm gonna use the questions for each of the tags for a different character, just to make things easier.

Ninma (Young)

Costume parties. Yes or no? Why or why not?

"What's that? I like parties! I haven't been to a party since I left home! Do I wear the costume or someone else? Is it a nice costume? Can Narul wear a costume too?"

What was the last thing that made you smile?

"Otilia brushed my hair. It still hurts sometimes but she's getting better at it. And she tells me stories when she does! She told me about a girl in...Kal...Kalmanaki...or whatever the city she is from is called (Kalmanati)." Ninma looks around conspiratorially to make sure that Otilia isn't listening and grins, "I think she liked that girl...like...kissed her maybe."

Do you hold grudges?

"Uh huh! My paba said that forgiveness is... the umm...its not for...us. Like nobles...forgiveness isn't for nobles. Yeah, that's what he said."

Otilia

If you had a pet, what animal would it be?

"Well, back when I was still in Kalmanati with that...awful man, I had a dog. It was a mongrel, but I was always pretty sure that it was at least part Agrikolic Hound. He had those long legs you know? We called him Bawebor (Korithian "barker"). I'd love to see him again...but I doubt that will ever happen. But, I'd love to have a new dog."

How long would you like to live? Why?

"Hmm...my grandmother was 77 when she passed. No teeth or sense left in her head, personally I'd prefer to go before I get that bad. I'll say 70? That seems like a good age to me. Plenty of experience to bring for my reincarnations. But lets be honest, I'd be happy with anything past 45. As long as I outlive my mother and my husband."

When will you be done?

"Done...hmm...I don't know if I ever will be? I've never been all that good at being idle. At least until I die. And then of course who knows what my other lives will be like. But I guess it sort of depends on what you mean by, done, I might be completely misunderstanding your question."

Narul

What's your favourite way to pass the time?

"I like going for walks. You can see the flowers and the trees. Even in winter, you can see the snow and the spirits. Sometimes I like to go alone, or just with Bop, but sometimes I convince Ninma to come with me. Those walks never last all that long before she's running after some poor butterfly or lizard...but I still enjoy them."

If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?

"I can't decide, I feel greedy when I think about that. I could save Ninma's parents and all of those people in Labisa, but then I would still be a slave. I could wish to have never been a slave at all, but then I would've never met Bira or Suru, and I wouldn't have been there to save Ninma and...well." He grimaces. "I could wish to not be a spiritblood, but then what use would I be to anyone? I think...I think I would save Bira. She'd be angry if she knew that's what I wasted that change on but..." He shrugs.

How many hours do you sleep?

"As many as I can. If I could I'd sleep ten hours a day if I could, but most days I actually sleep about four or five."

Akard

What genre of story would you rather be in? (as opposed to the one they are currently in)

"As long as Zenit can come with me, romantic poetry. Something flowery, tucked into a big book of other poems. The problem is what I want is a story where everything starts out good and ends good as well...not the most exciting, huh? Not what most people would expect from a king, right?"

Do you think you'd survive the movie A Quiet Place? (must stay as silent as possible or alien creatures hunt you down)

"Learning silence is a requirement of the Apunian court, and the marshes of Namut. My father wasn't much for words, aside from cursing my uncle. I think that I would do just fine."

What's your idea of a quiet get-together with a close friend?

"A close friend, you say? There was a Namutian, Qiruk. I beat him in battle and took him as a slave. He was a pain, bull-headed and clever. I still don't know how he managed it but we became friends and after some time I freed him and we have been good friends ever since. We used to spend evenings together, playing hanhat (an Apunian board game somewhat similar to checkers), eating dates, and drinking red beer. We would try not to talk the whole game, the first person to do so would be responsible for buying the beer for the next game. I never bought the beer."

Tagging

@illarian-rambling, @mk-writes-stuff, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @willtheweaver, @patternwelded-quill

@elsie-writes, @elizaellwrites, @the-ellia-west, @the-golden-comet

Your Questions Are:

1. What would you say is your greatest weakness?

2. Who is someone in your life that you like but that you don't trust?

3. If you could magically learn any mundane skill right now (cooking, a particular dance, a language, singing, sewing, etc.), what would it be?

[ren-rambles-often]

Hello.... If you don't mind me asking, who are your favorite romantic relationship's couples in books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series (can be canon or non-canon)? Feel free if you want to write the reasons or not of why you love them...Thanks if you want to answer....

Thanks for the ask and damn I'm always so excited when it comes to these so ofc I don't mind, also warning I'm about to kinda go off. It's a pretty long list so I'll only talk about the ones that left the biggest impression on me.

Warning for mentions of twincest, incest and age gaps.

Starting off with the ship that indoctrinated me into the bl life style *drumroll*

Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (aka Drarry); enemies/rivals to lovers, blond x ravenette, they basically set the precedent for every ship I pick up like a stray cat these days.

Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku (Bakudeku): Enemies to lovers, plus constantly on each other's mind as a motivation in one way or the other. I love them so much.

Mikage Reo/Nagi Seishiro (NagiReo): one of my current hyperfixations, mainly cuz they're one of the few ships I have that wasn't introduced as rivals from the start as well as being extremely close canonically. They click so well despite their miscommunication (more like no communication but I'll probably get to that another day).

Gojo Saturou/Itadori Yuuji (GoYuu): Most of my blog will you a clue already lol.

Sukuna/Itadori Yuuji (SukuIta): Number one toxic ship rn, but would you believe I prefer their siblings falling in forbidden love trope?

Mikaela Hyakuya/Yuuichiro Hyakuya (MikaYuu): Found family lovers that will give anything for each other? Sign me up.

Tyki Milk/Allen Walker: I walked into the D.gray man fandom late and I will never not regret it, I need more people that at least know who they are (〒﹏〒)

Eren Jeager/Armin Arlet & Eren Jaeger/Levi Ackerman (Eremin & Ereri): Getting these two out of the way at the same time cuz while I think Eren is undeniably his best self a lot with Armin, I love the thought of Levi being there as his inspiration.

Itoshi Rin/Itoshi Sae: Their beef is adorable but they need to fuck.

Roy Mustang/Edward Elric: I love their banter and they've both been through way too much together.

Bruce Wayne/Clark Kent (Superbat): one is batman the other is superman...Need I say more?

Dick Grayson/Tim Drake: I watched Titans and they had me.

Luka/Adrian (Lukachat): I stopped watch Miraculous at like S3 but these two are the only salvageable treasure from that mess to me.

Sherlock Holmes/William James Moriarty (Sherliam): From Moriarty the Patriot not any other adaptations please. There was that one movie tho. I love how they're constantly teasing and trying to outsmart each other like yeah babes, burn that city down to get his attention.

Kageyama Tobio/Hinata Shoyo (Kagehina): I haven't finished Haikyuu S2, spare me.

Kagami Taiga/Kuroko Tetsuya: what's with sports anime and K names, that aside, I don't know but their separation leaves me in tears everytime.

Yukio Okumura/Rin Okumura: Rin cares so much, Yukio stop being a yandere you closeted brocon! I know you!!!

Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji: I have a thing for broody possessive tops and oblivious bottoms and they were my awakening.

Hideyoshi Nagachika/Ken Kaneki (Hidekane): Receiving Tokyo ghoul spoilers of how things ended kept from finishing the show or starting the manga, what even is the point .·´¯`(>▂<)´¯`·.

Draken/Mikey/Takemichi & Draken/Mikey: DraMiTake is something I'd consume if I find it cuz I read this one precious fic I will forever cherise but DraMikey has way too much angst potential on its own. Tugs my heart to know Draken keeps Mikey grounded.

Baji Keisuke/Chifuyu Matsuno: Kazutora I will never fucking forgive you.

Hanma shuji/Kisaki Tetta: psychotic boyfriends, we love to see it (✿ ♡‿♡)

Reinhard Van Astrea/Natsuki Subaru: They are literally my banner plus he's one of the few people that doesn't give Subaru a hard time (I only watched S1)

Sebastian Michaelis/Ciel Phantomhive: Butler x master, what else do I need to add. I do absolutely adore the thought of Sebastian being cheeky when putting his young master in his place. I also love soft Sebastian, go figure.

Carnegie/Jonathan Sterling: No one remembers Darkside so I won't even dive into it. These two are the reason I'm trying to finish the series right now, book girlies, read Darkside by Tom Becker and come find me please ಥ‿ಥ

Dante/Vergil: It just makes sense ngl.

If you made it this far...why did you lollll, but honestly thanks for reading, talking about ships is one of my things and be free to ask again if you want me to expand upon or analyze any of these, that or if you just want recs. I'm down for anything.

[reggies-eyeliner]

𝐌𝐔𝐋𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐌 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐏𝐒 (CLOSED)!

OPEN 7/14-7/30!!

-> matchups + moodboards + playlists + headcanons! please read all of the rules listed below and pop into my ask box! if you need an idea on what my past matchups look like please check out these links! :DD

THIS IS LIKE A BUFFET. PICK AND CHOOSE WHAT YOU WANT BABES MWAHAHAHA

FANDOMS (up to two*):

across the spider-verse*

most animated movies (httyd, bh6, rotg^^)

lockwood & co*

stranger things

avatar: the last airbender

the legend of korra

rottmnt**

voltron: legendary defenders

* i've only watched the series so far + i'm about to start the comics/books (and very excited to omg) !! just an fyi that my pairings will most likely revolve more around the characters featured in the series IM SORRY I SWEAR I'LL GET TO THE BOOKS/COMICS ASAP

**exclusively platonic matchups preferred/qpr!

* if you are requesting two fandoms, please tell me which one to prioritize more! the first one will be the full-length, but the second will be around a half of the content in the prioritized fandom.

TYPES OF MATCHUPS:

the classic: submit in matchup information + get paired with (a) romantic partner(s)! in return for the matchup information, you will receive: a 1x3 moodboard, one song + a hefty list of headcanons + a mix-and-match randomized trope explanation! (ex: a blurb about sharing a bed, first time meeting, fake dating confession scene ; ~100 words!)

the platonic machup: platonic matchups (my personal fave MWAHAHA)! you'll get paired with as many characters as you'd like<3!! in return for matchup information, you will receive: a 1x3 moodboard, one song + a hefty list of headcanons + incorrect quotes describing your dynamic between you and your found family/best bro<3

customized schedule: submit what your schedule looks like throughout any day of the week (up to two) + matchup information (platonic or romantic), you will receive: an hourly schedule on what life is like with said character i match you with + the aspects of your life with them! (ex: 8am, wake up by their side + they make you coffee blah blah blah), + a song for each moment of the day to describe your dynamic :D

MATCHUP INFORMATION:

name + preferred gender(s) to be paired with + preferred age group(s)

preferred fandom (up to two are okay, but please let me know which one you'd like me to focus on more!)

platonic and/or romantic + polycule preference etc + preferred age group!!

you can include your sexuality if you'd like to (only if you want me to touch on the aspect on how your matchup will support you because. yeah<3)

giving + receiving love languages

hobbies, talents, things that make you you (think: if this wasn't in my life, how different would i be?)

mbti/zodiac (optional)

personality, how you handle difficult situations

what consist of a good memory for you

favorite songs + music taste/colors/any kind of aesthetics!!

anything that brings you comfort/anything that doesn't give you comfort (can be about a relationship or just in life :-D)

OTHER RULES?

preferably off anon! i'd love to talk to you more after the matchup submission as well MWAHHAHA<333 if you're planning on being anon, an emoji anon would be p cool so we can chat more!

as i'm also a busy student, i will prioritize school-- if you submit a matchup, please be prepared to have up to anywhere from a 1-14 day wait! i'll send you a message that i got your ask hehe

i will also be mostly inactive writing-wise from 7/18-7/23 as i will be on a trip, so please keep that in mind!

you should totally use a pick up line in my ask box i enjoy pick up lines so much. or one of those "less than one minute" videos on youtube those are the best man

please know that i absolutely love writing and talking to people, but i also have my own limits to what i can/cannot do for people! if you send nsfw content, pedophilia, violence, gore, heavy vents, all that not-so-great-stuff or an ask comes off as rude or demanding, i have all rights to avoid doing it and dismiss it without any warning. ASJCHS JUST be a decent human being in short that's all i'm asking RAHHH

OTHER THAN THAT MAN write as much/little as you'd like!!

#send a request here! :D

[beevean]

Hey Beev! Glad to hear about your driving going well. You know? I feel we share many things together. I dealt with a breakup not so long ago due to my possessive ex and his way of putting me down (despite my insecurities) (Don't think that was exactly your case, though) and now I'm trying to "rebuild" myself. Just wanted to ask (if not impolite) : Since you are now single and seem to "rebuild" too. Was your ex supportive in your dreams or desire to achieve something? Or did he sometimes ever belittle you?

Greetings!

Thank you! And I'm very sorry that happened to you, I hope you find your way forward by fighting your insecurities 🫂

I'd say yes. We didn't talk much about my dreams because... I really didn't have any, and it weighed on me, and he knew it so he rarely brought up the subject. The only time he did was in a context of "we've been together for six years now, I have a job now, I would like to think about our future: what about you?". But when I expressed the idea of plans, he was very proud.

At worst, he didn't seem to care much about my competitions, when to me they had become important. He could have come to see me since it would have taken him max half an hour in some places, and he never did. His opinion of me going to the gym was more or less "you don't need to build muscles when you're already so pretty" :^) yeah, people policing how feminine I am is a common theme, let's just say.

Anyway. We broke up for many reasons, but it was mainly incompatibility as lovers and people (both of us are stubborn asses lol). And there have been times when I didn't feel supported enough because he'd rather side with his mother than me, or wanted to push me in the general direction of his preferences. But never in the matters of life, and he never belittled me intentionally - sometimes I felt talked to like I was a child, but generally he had nothing but good words for me, and wanted to come from a place of "I can see that you're wonderful, why can't you?".

It's complicated. I can't really put here everything that happened and I don't want to paint myself as a poor victim. But no, he wasn't an abuser or toxic or anything, just very stubborn and passive-aggressive when angry, but always coming from what he thought was the right place. But I'm sadly just as stubborn and my insecurities made me a bad person and I was tired of the arguments that would stretch for days until one of us (me) caved in to apologize, so yeah, it had to end.

I wish he accepted to remain friends because I still care about him and we were very close, but he said he still loves me romantically and can't imagine to "go back" to friends status. So I'll just become a better person by myself. I don't really feel the need to be around people rn anyway.

I'm not really sure if my ramblings helped, but once again I extend my wishes that things get better for you, whether you find another person who truly loves you and supports you or you find your happiness by yourself <3

[losrtphu]

LOVE&HATE VICIOUS MAY 1999

FROM  A SHY SPEECHLESS BOY TO TODAY'S MOODMAKER DIE, WHAT MADE HIM CHANGE? IT SEEMS HE NOW ADMIRES PEOPLE WITH A COOL AURA

-Die what is your type in girls? and what type of girl do you not like?

if we're talking about personality, I think I like girls who are themselves, and I'm more interested when I talk to them and they're a bit strange. if I were to say it rougher I like girls who are kinda stupid (laughs) when they're not normal I'm more interested. it makes you want to know more about them right?

- I see, it makes it more intriguing. then on the other hand what girls do u not like?

someone who is strong-willed and people who lie. well, when I mean lie I mean lying about their relationships with other guys

- why do u not like strong-willed girls?

it's because I'm faint of heart (laughs), but that's also why girls who cry easily, or are just weak/delicate are also no good, I prefer feminine girls, girls who are boyish on the outside are fine too, but on the inside are feminine. but I easily fall in love.

- eh, really? like if they do something small you're easily charmed?

head yea exactly. but I can't pull the people that I'm into at all (laughs), I'm not purely talking about looks but that femininity or cuteness that person holds, that's what makes me interested. I don't really have a type, ah but, I'm not really into pretty model-type girls. I have this image that they're out of my reach. back in middle school, I was really quiet and there was this girl that stood out in my class and I wasn't able to get close to her. She felt special, she was like a flower on a high peak. you could say in my head I was constantly trying to get that flower.

-ehh~ you were a really shy middle schooler then.

I had always been since elementary, when I would talk to girls I would get butterflies. I was silent (illegible) and the type who wasn't able to raise my hand in class, so talking to a girl was unthinkable. in middle school, I sat next to a girl and she/I (not too sure sorry) said "Oh they finally laughed" It was rather simple (laughs)

- was that the same with the boys in your class?

yea pretty much. on the day of our entrance ceremony I wasn't the type to be the first to talk to other people I was simply too shy, so I waited to be talked to.

- so when were you able to talk to girls?

I think around when I entered high school. I was in English (illegible), and there were 10 guys and 30 girls. In those 3 years (illegible) when I looked forward or back it was all girls (laughs). but because of that I learned how to talk to girls, but even then I would still get butterflies.

- but you were still able to talk in front of a girl you liked right?

well, that's true but because of my shy personality it was rough. we went out for a month and she was a good person. I get nervous, it's pretty easy to talk with a girl who I'm not romantically interested in but once it's a girl who I like...

- so then even with the girl who you dated you didn't confess to her?

I was able to, still being nervous, but now when I think about it, it was like I fell in love with the feeling of being in love to put it in a cool way I admired the thought of it. which meant even when it was just us two we/I wouldn't talk, and when we would I would always be thinking "Ah- what are you saying!" or "I'm not funny at all~" and thought that it was all over and go home all depressed.

- for the 3 years you were in high school was it always like that?

yeah, ah, but in my third year, there was this girl I dated who was a super big fan of Yoshiki and she would always talk about how much she thought he was cool and I'd just respond like "ah~ yeah"(laughs). back then it wasn't like I was devoting my life to being in a band, so Yoshiki was a person in a completely different world to me. and then years pass and now I'm doing work with him. if that girl knew that now I wonder if she regrets, or something like that (laughs)

- she probably would a lot

yeah probably, I mean I/she (not sure) was the one who ended things *sorry unreadable once again*

- is that so?! I can't believe it.

no, but I was not that dependent because even I hated my personality, I was negative, it was even written on my school report card, "It'd be nice if he talked more positively".after all with girls, its better if you can have fun just by being together. like we're going out but I barely even talk. That's why I was jealous when a normal girl ended up with a confident boisterous guy

- I can't think of you as anything but the guy you've just described

right? Being able to be part of a band has changed me. I've met a lot of people and my opposition to speaking has gone. but I kind of still don't like myself now. it seems like I talk too much now.

- I don't think that's the case

well, it's still fun, but there are times that I want to pretend that I'm a quiet person. or pretend to have a cool character, the type of person with that atmosphere can say a few words and make it sound deep.

- but Die you have a personality that attracts others, so I think that's impossible. you wouldn't be able to take it and eventually start talking (laughs)

yeah probably, if I just met u and I wasn't able to speak I wouldn't feel satisfied(laughs)

- hahaha you'd be a completely different person (laughs). in that way aren't you happy that you're in a band now?

yea, and the fact that a became able to drink alcohol. like at parties when you get drunk you're able to freely speak right? I think that situation rubbed off on me

- and now you're better with girls

yeah, I've overcome it (laughs)

- I'm glad, then to the Die now, is love something that's important to you?

I think it I important, I think there's a lot to learn, things you learn from dating and things you learn from breaking up. it's just that I'm not the type to get obsessed with it. it's the band over girls. It's also business too, and because being in a band was my dream, the band is the most important to me.

- so you're a person who doesn't fully understand people who think love is the most important

yes. that's why if I was ever to go out with someone we would need to influence each other. I would of course take time to spend time with them but when I say im free/ on a break it isn't something definite. so a person who misses me a lot and wants to be together all the time is definitely out of the question. I want someone whos able to understand that the band is important to me, someone that will be relieved even after not meeting or seeing each other for a while, a bright person. deciding to go ahead with the band is my duty.

[orchidyoonkook]

I wasn't ignoring you! I've been depressed lately... So I haven't actually been sociable with many people at the moment, or with anyone if you want me to be honest. I would try to be in a healthier mindset before I get back into conversations with people if I am actually able to do so.

But, then I woke up to the news that the guitarist (from a band I listen to) is leaving the band. Because of the timing of the announcement.. I thought, along with many other fans, believed it was just an elaborate April Fool's prank. But it doesn't seem that way. So! Now that brought my depression back hearing that news. My mental health is changing everyday. So I have conflicting feelings about hearing that new today.

So there's that.

I know, I know.. I'm just overreacting about news that I'm not apart of in any way so it shouldn't effect me but it also does at the same time.

I've noticed some emojis don't seem to appear on certain devices so I will have to figure out an emoji that actually appears everywhere, or if it would be easiest to know who is who (while I'm being anonymous).

Yeah.. I'm a private person. I would only reveal things about myself if I am actually comfortable around any other person. I'm always like this all the time. Doesn't matter if you're family, friends, even strangers.

Oh! Yeah. Maybe I should've elaborated those specific relationships in fictional stories. I can see and read dark content, but never content in that way; those ships are limitations that I'm never comfortable with.

I wasn't going to say specific words in you - or anyone else who might have - read my messages. Since I know certain terms may actually be upsetting for some people. Maybe my explanation was just too vague though, so I should've elaborated more with being explicit about that.

Based on labels. My style was between "emo", "goth", "punk", "grunge" and every style in between that you could think of. Ripped jeans have always been my preference in pants.. Usually black shirts, sometimes I'd wear band shirts on occasion or shirts with graphic designs (skulls is an obvious example). Dyed hair, piercings. This is still my own style.

So it doesn't was not a phase for me like most people believed.. There was only a few people who knew that my style wasn't any phase at all either. Anyway! I'm getting too off topic again. Or at least I think I am.

Yes! Guys and girls could be friends. Not every relationship between a guy and girl have romantic or sexual either, there are also the platonic ships and even kinships too. Depending on how close their bonds are.

I rarely had female friends. Not because "I'm just like one of the guys." was the reason. Well.. Maybe I felt that way when I was a preteen that time. But I usually have better connections to guys. Nothing against a lot of women, since I know not every female is the same person when it comes to actions and reactions. I knew many girls who were always horrible to me. Other than people who treated me differently once it's been known that I'm disabled, since people have treated me different once they've found out about my disabilities (like autism for example) - but this is towards people in general though. When it comes to girls; so many female friends were jealous of me for whatever reasons they had. I'm not being conceited. They were actually jealous of me for any reasons I don't know. Any time I had other friends besides her, dating boyfriends or even had a crush on guys, she'd always steal them from me. Which is why I have trust issues with people. The girls I knew end up abusive towards me. Physically, mentally and emotionally. And the few friends, including female friends, worth having in my life were the people who abandoned me. So I've gotten used to being alone now.

And don't get me started on being friends who guys who actually did stop hanging out with me because of jealous girlfriends.. So I was not sure if they hated, distrusted, me. Or they distrusted their boyfriends.

That happened frequently too.. So having every trust issue that I have been through. I tend to push people away, before they push me away.

Yeah. Regardless of sexuality, I just can't see the BTS boys in any ship that isn't a familial ship. Kinships? Something like that. Like.. I am fine with side ships but not main ships. Nothing against people who enjoy those ships though. People should read and write their own stories.

I haven't officially came up with a nickname yet... But you might know by now that I'm the verbose anon who never even knows how to keep messages shorter than what I respond with. That may be a give away.

I finally FINALLY have the time and proper mental space to reply to this!!! Lemme dig in!!

I never thought you were ignoring me dear!! don't worry I know we all have out social limits and sometimes you just need to not be a person for a while in order to recharge. I think it's incredibly kind that you are aware of your mindset when interacting with folks and chose not to interact when you know it isn't in the best place. But please know that I'm here if you ever need to vent or need a little sprinkle of colour or kindness in life. Depression is so hard and I would never treat you differently because of it <3

I'm so so sorry the guitarist from your fav band is leaving 😔. I hope it's so that they can better their health or for the best at least. And if not, i personally find a comfort in knowing that you had them in the band for as long as you did, and you can always go back to old videos and music to reminisce. But again that's a personal coping mechanism of mine.

You're not overreacting. If this is your favourite band I'm going to assume they play rather large role in your life. So it's completely understandable to have big feelings about it. If the guitarist from my favourite band was leaving I would have enormous feelings about it as he's been with the band since 2003. Like. It's something that's a big deal. Your reaction is super valid.

Emoji's are dumb like that sometimes unfortunately. I'm happy to use whichever emoji you'd like. Or a psued if you want. Both work for me. But I usually know it's you , you're memorable!

And I can respect that. I would never push you to not be like that, I just want you to know that I'm here if you need it. The anon part of tumblr is a beautiful feature that way. Talking to strangers who are also friends without the pressure of them actually knowing. It's a very amazing type of human connection. And I find it easier to tell filks things when it can't fall back on me. Like a living diary almost. I find it super cool at least. An annonymous form of community you can't really replicate anywhere else. Beautfiul when you think about it.

Ahhh gotcha!! RE: side ships and pairings. Totally makes sense!!

I'm not someone who can be triggered easily, I semi-regularly consume darker content/ dead dove type (mainly out of loving jealously for the folks who write it so well. my ass could never) so as long as the terms you chose are talked about with respect or in proper terminolog I dont see myself being upset.

Your style sounds like what I would dress as if i had a bit more courage. I'd love to dye my hair again and get so many pericings and tats but i haven't quite gotten myself there yet. Hell, my mum has more tats than me. Just go ther sleeve done a year or two ago and is working on her next one soon! It's just something about that particular style that's comfortable to me, but my neurodivergence (AuADHD) makes permanent alterations to my body freak me out a bit, hence the need for courage. It's more of a mental block than anything,

Also it is 100% me who always goes off topic so fear not! you fit right in if you slip once of twice too!

Half of my closest decade(s) long friendships are with guys so I absolutely agree with you. I never dated any of them and neither did the other girls in the friend group. We've all known one another (as in all of us in the group knowing everyone in the group) since 9th grade and we're turning 25 this year. So it's absolutely possible. People just like to think it's not.

I was similar. When I think of my childhood and my childhood frienships, all of my girl friends were neighbours, whereas all of my school friends were primarily guys, and for the same and similar reasons you've mentioned. I was primarily raised by my dad and I only have brothers so it makes sense to me why I hung out with guys more. And I had a similar experience where girls were just mean to me for no reason and I couldnt at the time figure it out. I know why now that I'm older. But still, that hurts when you're young so you're more likely to go and be with those who feel safer to be with.

I knew i felt a certain type of similarity between out experiences and the shared diagnosis' makes so much sense. Folks treat me very different once I mention that ASD is the reason I dont undertsand things they way they tell me too or whatever the situation is. It's actually why I left my last job. They wouldn't accomodate me and my performance suffered to much as did my mental health.

"many female friends were jealous of me for whatever reasons they had. I'm not being conceited. They were actually jealous of me for any reasons I don't know." My mum saw this when i was younger too. She said i was (and am) "intimidating" and so people would try their best to knock me down a peg. hence the jealousy when their couldnt or when the realised that they wanted what i had. I've accepted it now, and silently acknowledge it. But once again, it still hurt the little girl who couldn't figure out why she was treated so differently.

'The girls I knew end up abusive towards me. Physically, mentally and emotionally. And the few friends, including female friends, worth having in my life were the people who abandoned me. So I've gotten used to being alone now." I'm truly sorry you had to/ have to deal with this. Not in a pitying way, but in a 'human to human I see and acknowledge the things you've gone through in your life' way. I hope you are able to one day build and find for yourself a lovely group of humans who love and respect you for you. Who don't tear you down like the horrible people before them, and instead lift you up. I will happily be a part of that, should you like to have me, just so you know. I may be words on a screen, but there is a person behind them who sees you.

The girlfriend situation of guy friends is something I have very fortunately not had to deal with as I usually end up being their friend too. I have a habit of wanting everyone to feel accepted and included in spaces I exist in, and it commonly plays to my favour. But I have had and heard second hand experiences with this, and it's just awful. And we can reiterate to earlier where guys and girls can be friends without anything going on. I have never understood girls who cut their guys off from perfectly normal and healthy female frienships.

Pushing folks away before they push you is absolutely a coping mechanism I understand. Breaking through that was one of the more difficult things I've been trying to learn as an adult. That some rare folks actually want to be there for me, and truly have no ill intentions. I hope you are able to one day have this as well, to which, once again, I will happily be one, should you want.

Perfectly respectable opinion on the boys and relationships. I have nothing to add other than I agreee completey.

And yes XD I am usually able to tell it's you by the length!! I just know some folks like having a tag to make searching for thir asks easier! I know I did before i had tumblr. It just made tracking what I'd sent in way easier! No rush tho!

Hope you are well, darling <3. Always lovely chatting with you.

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Seven forms of love asks: the first one of each category for either Ari, Liam or June?

[ask game]

Ooh so many!! >:] Imma do all of them hehe

Eros 1: Is your OC romantic in the traditional sense? Do they enjoy giving or receiving gifts of flowers or confectionary? Or are there other courtship traditions from their culture of origin that are important to them?

Ari: Hmm honestly? I'd say so, yeah. He's romantic in a chivalrous kind of way, and even if it's less on purpose and more "how else am i supposed to do this?" i'll still say it counts lol. Once past the courting he's romantic in how much attention he pays to his partner's interests and likes and in how he will support those. That ties into gifts etc. as well, because he is more likely to go by his partner's preferences/culture/etc rather than his own. It's for them, after all, so it should be meaningful to them.

Liam: Yes 100%, he is probably The corniest romantic out of all my ocs lmao. He's the 'will slowdance in the livingroom', 'will hold hands at the theatre', 'will reenact the Titanic scene at the bow' kind of romantic. He is not a fan of expensive or elaborate gifts, but anything small and thoughtful will do the trick. I've long integrated that one hc about courting in Ferelden into my worldview so giving and receiving flowers from a lover is something he values a lot.

June: Not at all. She's a romance repulsed aro, so. Not much of a romantic hfldksjf. It wasn't something she'd given any thought until it became relevant, after she and Cullen started getting closer and she had to figure out what she wanted out of the relationship. There is certainly some overlap with what would typically be considered romantic, but she is still not at all romantic in a traditional sense. Also re: gift giving, she's not a fan lol. June is horrible at both receiving and giving gifts that are not practical in nature, so she'd rather avoid it entirely.

Philia 1: Does your OC have a Best Friend? If they do then how long have they known each other and how did they meet? If they don't then do they have a close group of friends they love equally? Or are they more of a loner?

Ari: I'd say that Joseohine, Leliana and Vivienne all equally count as best friends to him, out of which he vibed with Viv the quickest. Josephine he he didn't call a friend until later even though they got along really well, out of worry that it would be inappropriate. He also definitely had some close friends in the Valo-Kas, but admittedly i haven't thought about them as much as i should lol so i don't have any specifics there.

Liam: Varric and Fenris; Fenris because the grow close, Varric because they did the anime mind flash connection thing and simply forged a silent pact early on (they vibe because they are (partially) fucked up in the same way <3). During the time in Kirkwall until the Deep Roads he also definitely considered Bethany his best friend.

June: Dorian and Sera are her ride or die besties, but Dorian came first and is still just barely holds best friend status over Sera. They got along sooner, they share interests, and they simply Work.

Storge 1: Did your OC's parents love them unconditionally? If so then has this helped them feel confident as an adult? If not then how has this affected them? What were the conditions their family attached to their relationship?

Ari: Considering that both his parents felt a little out of their league because usually he would've been taken care of by Tamas, they did really well! Growing up as the only Vashoth kid around could get a bit tough even if the environment was friendly, so they made extra sure to make him feel loved.

Liam: I am sure that they did, but it did not always come across that way. Subconsciously the love, over time, started feeling tied to how well he fulfilled his duties (or what he perceived a such) as eldest son, even if it was subconscious.

June: The love was most definitely perceived as conditional, always dependent on performance. They were a noble family with decent standing and strong ties to the Chantry, which left the sisters with high expectations and a constant competition for approval.

Agape 1: Does your OC wish to make the world a better place? How far do they see that as being their responsibility? What lengths would they go to in order to help achieve this?

Ari: Yes, and it's something he has become especially persistent about since becoming Inquisitor. He is now in a position where changing things on a greater scale is Actually Possible, and he maaaybe gets a little too hung up on the ideals he has in his mind.

Liam: Not really? He believes in common human decency and in simply being nice to people, but he does not generally see it as his responsibility to "make the world a better place". However, he does feel responsible as soon as he gets involved in something, so he ends up helping a lot anyway lol.

June: It is not a priority, no, and she does not feel responsible for the greater good. She does start caring more about the impact she has and the good that she can do, but never to the point where she'd get worked up about it.

Ludus 1: Does your OC have any particular favourite chat up lines? If not for themselves then perhaps ones they have suggested to a friend? How effective do these tend to be?

Ari: Any chat up lines he know he knows from books or from Leliana, and he decided that it would probably be best not to try those himself lolol. He is very good at complimenting people though! Which can come across as flirty sometimes, for better or for worse.

Liam: If he is being smooth on main you can be sure that it was on accident, because he is horrible at flirting. But he wouldn't try it for showing genuine interest anyway. However with an established partner he thoroughly enjoys throwing all the bad corny pickup lines at them, and we're talking "did it hurt when you fell [...]" type bad

June: Casual flirting is basically her modus operandi when it comes to friendly conversation, but when she's trying for a hookup or something she'll be way more bold and direct. June is way more witty than i am lol so i can't give you any proper examples, but she's very good at coming up with lines on the spot (and they tend to work pretty well!)

Pragma 1: Is your OC in a committed long-term relationship (or relationships)? If so then what has contributed to this relationship lasting so well? If they are not in such a relationship, then is this something that saddens them or which they regret?

Ari: A committed relationship hadn't been something on his radar, but he an Josie simply Worked. They mesh really well, they have similar interests, they enjoy talking with one another a lot, they're intellectually on the same wavelength... it gets strained after Trespasser, but they're holding tight so far.

Liam: Depends on the worldstate, but in the one where he lives he is with Fenris! I think part of why it works is that they're both very affectionate and very devoted people at heart, but they also simply get on well and work well as a team. A long-term relationship is definitely something Liam sought out.

June: It wouldn't have been something she'd have considered or missed, but here we are, and she is content with how it worked out. June and Cullen are good at both pushing and grounding each other, and they end up finding a good deal of support in their relationship.

Philautia 1: Does your OC have a healthy sense of their own worth and value? Or do they see themselves as failing to live up to their original potential? Perhaps they are convinced of their own sinful or inadequate nature?

Ari: I wouldn't say he has a lacking or inflated sense of self-worth, he simply exists as himself and is okay with that. There are things he is self-conscious about, there are things he is proud of, all within reason. Where it gets more complicated is the sense of value he gives his actions ; that is where the feeling of Not Enough sets in

Liam: I think it's decent. Overall he is fine with who is is and how he is, and does give his own needs their due, but he will quickly feel like he is not worthy of someone's love when he, in his eyes, fails to take care of them. It doesn't impact is sense of self-worth per se but it does make him feel like he failed as a friend/son/sibling/etc

June: There are things about herself that she is very proud of, but overall her sense of self-worth is. Not the best. Being self-centered is a defence mechanism against feeling like she is constantly failing expectations everywhere, a feeling that she got a little too used to growing up (yay for performance based families! <3)

[a-sky-of-diamonds]

*barges into your house through your window*

so how we feeling about the limited life finale?

VERY happy :DD

I've been rooting for Martyn since Last Life, when I first started watching his perspective*, and honestly don't care that much about the angst of betrayals or anything – I was rooting for him SO hard in the last three series (and especially this one because I think he said there wasn't a series 5 planned at that point yet and I needed him to get a win ok) and it's FINALLY happened and I don't care what happened to get there. He deserves the win, especially after coming 3rd in the two previous seasons. Aaaahhh

*(gather round for backstory time under the cut)

Basically I watched Grian for 3rd Life, and later on watched Scott's perspective too (and started to watch Cleo's too, it was really good I just never got around to finishing it), but didn't actually watch any of Dogwarts (actually because of the perspectives I watched, during the battle of the red desert where Scott and Grian lost their first lives and Jimmy permadied, I remember really hoping Grian would kill Martyn and was really happy when he died to a skeleton... how times change, huh...). But people were talking about it and I was curious, and I think what finally pushed me to watch their POV was a Renchanting animatic I saw ("I hear a symphony" by Ratzy – if anyone hasn't seen it please do it's incredible. You can interpret it as either romantic or platonic, I interpreted it as the latter (I'm not super into shipping, I'm an aro who isn't that big of a fan of romance so I mostly tend to stay away, and in my opinion deep friendships can be just as important if not more than romantic relationships), but either way it hits like a truck and please guys, just watch it)?

Anyway, since I already knew Ren from Hermitcraft I was like "you know what, I'm going to try watching Martyn for a change, I want to see what his perspective is like". So I began watching it, and found it REALLy good, and right around that time, Last Life came out? So I decided yeah, I'm still going to watch Grian, but I'm definitely watching Martyn's perspective too (especially after the voice). And at the start I was still more invested in Grian's perspective, but I think around episode 4/5 it started to shift, and I think when episode 6 came out I decided to watch Martyn's perspective first (Grian hadn't uploaded yet and I needed to know what happened) and that was a big thing because I'd always watch Grian first and I was breaking from that (also Grian is still an amazing content creator and I do watch him sometimes, it's just preferences shifting over time). And it stayed that way for the rest of Last Life, and I'd say near the end was the time he became my main POV (I'm not sure if I watched Grian's last two episodes?). And I'm honestly SO glad that happened, because??? all the lore and storytelling in last life??? is absolutely incredible, and as someone still so invested in the meaning, story and coherency of 3rd life and sort of still holding Last Life to the same standard when it was very different, the voice lore provided such a cool narrative to watch, and it's definitely one of my favourite perspectives in the whole of the Life series (with Grian 3rd life and Pearl double life coming close).

And then it stayed like that, with me rooting for him each season (and he got SO close in last and double life too), also occasionally watching Pearl first for Double Life as well and following her perspective a lot, and same with Limited Life but with Scott.

And so yeah after 3 seasons and twice coming SO so close, he completely deserved the win, and I'm honestly really happy he did what he did at the end instead of engaging in that fight – if he came so close and didn't win again I'd be pretttttty sad (though happy for the winner).

[ratasum]

OC Interview: Qirri Tinkerfirst

Name: "Qirri of Pazz, though Garrus gave me the honorary name within his warband of Tinkerfirst!"

Are you single: "No, not really. Taimi and I entered into a relationship during that whole mess with the charr civil war, and it wasn't long before Gorrik and Zanthe also joined us. Garrus jokingly refers to us as a "polykrewe.""

Are you happy: "W-well... when I'm working, I'm happy."

Are you angry: "I'm chronically ill in a society that has a terrible superiority complex. I am always angry."

Are your parents still married: "Most asura only contract for set lengths of time, but my parents extended their contract indefinitely. They make a very good match."

NINE FACTS

Birthplace: "I was born in Rata Sum. All my sisters were born there too. My parents have lived in the residential district there since they were progeny."

Hair colour: "White, as you can see."

Eye colour: "Sort of a... pinkish... red? I have albinism so... yeah."

Birthday: "213 Scion 1309! I was still sixteen when Zhaitan fell."

Mood: "Right now? Tentatively relaxed. Things have finally quieted down a little bit, for the moment."

Gender: "Female!"

Summer or winter: "Summer. The winter air hurts my lungs too much."

Morning or afternoon: "I tend to lose track of time but I like afternoon best. Lots more shade."

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

Are you in love: "That is such a complicated question and the answer is "I'd rather unravel the sacred geometry of the Eternal Alchemy than sort out how these feelings work but I believe the answer is yes considering my partners.""

Do you believe in love at first sight: "Absolutely not. Love requires chemistry, mutual understanding, hard work..."

Who ended your last relationship: "I've never been in a relationship before this one."

Have you ever broken someone’s heart: "I don't think so? No one's told me if I have anyway."

Are you afraid of commitments: "I... mmh. Maybe a little? It's hard to commit when that feels like something that could last longer than the time you have."

Have you hugged someone within the last week: "Of course! Zanthe, Taimi, even Gorrik once when he puzzled through a particularly difficult equation."

Have you ever had a secret admirer: ".......am I... supposed to know if I had a secret admirer if it's meant to be secret...?"

Have you ever broken your own heart: "Not from romance."

SIX CHOICES

Love or lust: "Both are neurochemical con jobs, but love I suppose."

Lemonade or iced tea: "Neither. I prefer hot water with honey, orange, and cloves."

Cats or dogs: "Cats, all the way. But considering I'm an honorary member of a charr warband, I'm maybe biased."

A few best friends or many regular friends: "A few close friends. I... never had many friends growing up. The people I have now are all I have and I'm happy to have them."

Wild night out or romantic night in: "Absolutely neither. I prefer a long night of bouncing ideas off each other in a wild inventing session."

Day or night: "Nighttime honestly. It's less difficult for me to move around."

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

Been caught sneaking out: "I ran away from home to the Black Citadel while I was supposed to be on what was effectively house arrest - "home convalescence" - after I had a bad fainting spell during one of my classes. No one caught me until I caught myself and came home to finish college."

Fallen down/up the stairs: "...so many times. Look, I'm short for an asura, okay?"

Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt: "...yeah. More than you think."

Wanted to disappear: "I mean... I don't like to admit it, but... sometimes. Yeah."

FOUR PREFERENCES

Smile or eyes: "Eyes. And ears, honestly. Asura thing."

Shorter or taller: "Kinda has to be taller. I'm very short, even for an asura."

Intelligence or attractive: "Oh, intelligence, beyond a doubt. Looks can be tolerated, but stupidity? Never."

Hook-up or relationship: "I might be afraid of commitment but I obviously have gone for romance over a hook-up. Too many variables."

FAMILY

Do you and your family get along: "I guess sometimes. I get along more with Rissi and Dad than I do with Mom or the twins. But we all love each other, even if we squabble."

Would you say you have had a “messed up life”: "I was an incredibly sheltered child with weak lungs and brittle health who then, at sixteen, witnessed a massacre perpetrated by the risen minions of an elder dragon and then helped kill said dragon. It's only gone downhill from there. It's, uh... it's left an impact."

Have you ever run away from home: "Yep! Without hesitation, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat."

Have you ever gotten kicked out: "No. My parents have wanted me to come home and stay home for years now. They worry about me a... normal amount, all things considered."

FRIENDS

Do you secretly hate one of your friends: "I don't think so. I get frustrated with my krewe but that's normal."

Do you consider all of your friends good friends: "I don't have many, so yes. I do."

Who is your best friend: "Garrus is my absolute favorite friend in the world!"