#but why why why are random people. who are just.. conventionally attractive?

[susansontag]

not only has the above comment committed the intellectual sin of assuming conventional attractiveness = virtue (I’ve written about this before lol), but they also assume women can’t be actually attracted to people others might deem less conventionally attractive, and therefore they are somewhat lying about it LOL. why can’t people accept that for a lot of people physical attractiveness is something that is fairly subjective and often lives or dies on how someone behaves etc (effectively, your physical appearance and personality are not as detachable imo as many people who speak about this make it seem; actually often the people who do talk like this are men!).

absolutely men are sexists who believe only conventionally attractive women deserve to live etc etc but that doesn’t mean we have to adopt their viewpoint with some sort of feminist spin. no one is dying because a woman is genuinely interested in and likes a man you deem to be below her based on your patriarchal point system (‘out of their league’ etc). if she’s not and actually is trying to make herself interested in someone she’s not, then that is one thing and worthy of feminist criticism, but a lot of the time you people are just assuming that women are settling and it comes off as extremely presumptuous, as though you’re a better arbiter of these women’s feelings than they are themselves.

I’m sorry but both extremes are bad. men dehumanising women is bad, but assuming physical attraction is based on some measure of societal conventional attractiveness and is not deeply personal for most people is also bad and what’s more, unfounded. some women are with people they’re not attracted to, fine. but they are the arbiters of that, not random strangers who again assume loads of women are hopelessly lying to themselves about their desires.

anyway bored as hell that I’ve had to be out here responding to a post about hets but this keeps bothering me there is no objective analysis going on here kdkdkdjdk

[natjennie]

the idea of "influencers" both confuses me and pisses me off to the highest caliber. like what do you mean. what qualifications do you have to be influencing anyone. what are you famous for... being famous? I don't get it.

[thealchemistbae]

💖 Random & Underrated Venus Persona Chart Observations 💖

Disclaimer: This post is for entertainment purposes only.

thealchemistbae © do not copy, redistribute, or edit my content.

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💖: Venus in the 12th house – This placement in your Venus Persona Chart can indicate secret admirers you never notice, or a subconscious pull towards unavailable or mysterious lovers. You might attract people through your energy alone, rather than your outward appearance. There’s an “I don’t know why I like them, but I do” effect around you.

💖: Venus conjunct South Node (<2° orb) – A major past-life lover indicator. This often suggests that you unknowingly repeat romantic karma in this lifetime. Certain people may enter your life, and you feel like you owe them something, even if the relationship isn’t beneficial for you. These relationships tend to feel fated but also difficult to break free from.

💖: 1° Venus or Venus conjunct Ascendant (<1° orb) – If your Venus Persona Chart has Venus at 1°, you have a magnetic aura that naturally draws people in without effort. Even if you don’t consider yourself conventionally attractive, there’s a fresh, exciting, and youthful energy around you. This is the kind of placement that makes people fall in love with your presence alone.

💖: Venus in the 8th house – This placement intensifies desire but also creates an unconscious fear of betrayal. People with this in their Venus Persona Chart often attract deep, transformative relationships that force them to change the way they see love. Their aesthetic is mystical, sultry, and a little dangerous…think dark femme or soft but deadly energy.

💖: Venus trine Pluto (<3° orb) – Effortlessly seductive. People with this in their Venus Persona Chart don’t have to try to be desirable—people just fixate on them. They have a natural allure that keeps others wanting more, even if they don’t fully understand why. Their presence alone can shift the energy in a room.

💖: Venus in Aquarius at 11° or 29° – These individuals express love in unconventional ways. They may be drawn to long-distance relationships, online connections, or unique love dynamics that others wouldn’t typically consider. 29° adds a sense of unpredictability; love tends to enter their life in the most unexpected moments.

💖: Venus square Mars (<2° orb) – Instant sexual tension in relationships. Their love life is full of push-pull energy; one moment, they’re all in, the next, they’re backing off. People with this in their Venus Persona Chart may attract connections where there’s an intense chemistry but also frequent clashes of will.

💖: Venus in the 3rd house – This placement brings a flirtatious, charming, and poetic way of expressing love. They have a way with words that makes people melt. Texting and deep conversations play a huge role in their romantic dynamics. If the mind isn’t stimulated, neither is the heart.

💖: Venus in Leo at 5° or 15° – Natural icons. People with these placements have a beauty that is theatrical, regal, and unapologetic. They don’t chase; people gravitate toward them. They’re the ones who become the center of attention without even trying.

💖: Sun in the 12th House – You may struggle with fully expressing your romantic identity, often feeling unseen in love. Your love life could be tied to secrets, hidden affairs, or spiritual connections.

💖: Moon square Venus (<2°) – Your emotions and love language often clash, making relationships feel emotionally intense yet unpredictable. You crave deep affection but might sabotage intimacy without realizing it.

💖: Mercury conjunct Venus (<1°) – Flirting is second nature to you, and your words carry an irresistible charm. You likely attract lovers through texting, writing, or intellectual connection before anything physical.

💖: Mars in the 8th House – Passion runs deep, and your love life is anything but surface level. You attract intense, transformative relationships that often involve power dynamics, obsession, or deep emotional bonding.

💖: Jupiter trine Venus (<3°) – Luck follows you in love, and relationships tend to bring growth, joy, and abundance. You naturally attract partners who expand your world, whether emotionally, intellectually, or financially.

💖: Saturn opposite Venus (<2°) – Love feels like a challenge, often coming with delays, restrictions, or lessons in patience. You may attract karmic relationships that require effort but ultimately lead to long-term commitment.

💖: Uranus in the 7th House – You attract unpredictable relationships and unconventional partners. Love enters and exits your life suddenly, and you may find yourself drawn to long-distance or non traditional connections.

💖: Neptune in the 5th House – You have a fairytale-like view of love, often falling for the idea of a person rather than who they truly are. Your relationships may feel magical but can sometimes lead to disillusionment.

💖: Pluto conjunct Venus (<1°) – Love is powerful, transformative, and all consuming. You attract deep, soul bonding relationships, but you may also experience power struggles, jealousy, or intense karmic ties.

💖: Chiron in the 2nd House – Your self worth is deeply tied to how love is given and received. You may feel unworthy of affection at times, but healing comes from recognizing your value outside of relationships.

💖: North Node in the 10th House – Your love life is meant to be public in some way. You may attract partners who elevate your status, or relationships could play a major role in your career and reputation.

thealchemistbae © do not copy, redistribute, or edit my content.

I’m sure there is more but honestly this is all I have for now. Enjoy ⚡️

If you enjoyed this post, you can leave me a tip via PayPal at goddessguapa@gmail.com or via Venmo @goddessguapa. Thank you.

[youremyheaven]

Random Astrology Observations- Relationship Edition

1. Men with Mars in water signs are usually the most fcked up in bed. They have bizarre kinks and often take things too far. They're probably aroused by bizarre things. They like to go to extremes and are probably very controlling & dominating in bed.

2. People with prominent 4h placements carry heavy family karma. This is a very challenging placement to have. You're either going to grow up feeling obsessively loved or neglected af.

3. Scorpios have a reputation for being possessive but you know who's actually possessive? Fire signs. They're like bulls in a china shop with love, unable to express themselves properly they just feel pissed off when they see others get too close or do stuff with their person. Anger is how they react to jealousy & possessiveness.

4. The ultimate baby making aspect is Moon conjunct Mars but bbg have you heard of Venus Conjunct Pluto? this is a rarer aspect but the sex is bomb dot com with this one.

5. Libra women are the kind of women that other women find attractive and Cancer women are the kind of women men find attractive.

Edit: i thought ill explain why this is the case

Cancer women are more representative of sexual polarity which leads to "femininity" and since sexual polarity is what creates attraction, men/masculine ppl are drawn to its opposite; women who are conventionally feminine.

Libra is the 7th sign in the zodiac, 7 is the number of union, of merging of opposites, therefore they possess both feminine and masculine energies, thus making them androgynous almost (purely in an energetic way, they can look/behave however they like). Women are drawn to other women who are more integrated and androgynous ish. For ex: Bella Hadid is a Libra Sun, she's considered gorgeous & stunning by loads of women but she's not someone men are drawn to simply bc she's intimidating and a little androgynous.

6. Sagittarius is the most introverted of all the fire signs. They are selectively social. They also think they're better than others (a lot of the time, they are tho 🫣)

7. Venus in 10h is The High Priestess placement to me. You'll never get over a girl with Venus in 10h

8. Jupiter in 1h/2h/4h often tends to make the native voluptuous. Even men with this placement are big & beefy 👅

9. Opposites attract is true af in astrology

Mars dominant men obsessively fall for Venusian women because they are the opposites.

10. 5h synastry creates a very sexual and pleasurable relationship.

11. The people you have crazy sexual tension with are those you have 7h/8h/12h synastry with

[hayatheauthor]

hello! i'm trying to write a manipulative/cunning character that uses his charm to get what he wants, but i'm unsure how to go about it without being too overt. he basically acts all polite and uses peoples' inherent biases (like how they are more likely to listen to or trust someone who's conventionally attractive)

i'm also struggling to come up with instances where he'd use those skills. surely he can't just walk up to somebody and say something out of nowhere haha

thank you for your time!

That’s such a fun character to write! For subtle manipulation, focus on how he frames things—he never demands, just suggests. He compliments before slipping in a request, or pretends to confide in someone to earn their trust.

Manipulation has three core tactics:

Mirroring – He subtly copies people's tone, body language, or opinions to build fast rapport. People feel more at ease when they see themselves in someone else.

Framing choices – He never gives direct orders. Instead, he offers two options—both benefiting him—but makes one seem like the “better” or more moral choice.

Playing the victim or the hero – Depending on what the situation calls for, he knows when to act vulnerable to gain sympathy, or when to seem competent and generous to earn loyalty.

As for scenes: think small but calculated moments—like offering help so he can later call in a favor, or using flattery to get into private conversations. His charm should feel effortless, like everything he does just naturally benefits him. Let people want to say yes to him, because why wouldn't they? He'd never do anything wrong!

Use foreshadowing and drop hints through your scenes too, like:

He helps a powerful person in public (small act, big praise), later using that goodwill to get access somewhere.

He praises someone’s intelligence just before suggesting a risky plan—making them feel clever for agreeing.

He eavesdrops, then later "guesses" something personal about someone to seem insightful and trustworthy.

Basically, his charm is a tool, not a mask—it’s always used with purpose.

One character that comes to mind for inspo is Tom Riddle. I wrote a Tom Riddle fanfic series for like 2 years and crafting scenes where everyone thinks he's perfect while internally he's looking down on all of them was so so fun! Some personal tips from that experience:

Have someone who knows the truth! The one person who doesn't fall for his charm no matter what he tries, make his eye twitch and smile strain as he tries to maintain the farce of perfection whenever this person calls him out in public.

Internal monologue. It's important to make sure your readers get that this guy doesn't actually like the random girl he flirted with to get access to the professor's records. Or that the group of friends that constantly swarm him are really just nuisances in his eyes.

Make things easy, but not too easy. Have people who easily fall for the physical charm, and others whose trust he gains by making them let their guard down. The sceptic trusts him because he's apparently part of the same tiny dog club as them, the girl who falls for no one feels her heart flutter by how 'real and kind' he was during the moment they 'accidentally' met outside school.

I hope this helps!

[theglassofmiddleearth]

Evenfall

Imagine you wake up in Twilight as a random side character. (Part 3)

Nullification!reader Human reader! SideCharacter Bella! Isekai au! Edward Cullen X reader. Eventually Jacob Black x reader. (2 endings.) (All characters will be written less creepy and one dimensional than the ones in the books.)

Previous - Next

That night, Y/N remembered to close her windows.

Just finishing her night routine, she headed over to her bedside window and began to pull it down shut. As soon as she reached the curtains of the open window, a small rock sailed past her head.

Y/N’s eyes followed the projectile, her face in almost as much shock as it was earlier this afternoon.

‘What in the flying f-’ Y/N snapped her head to look outside of her window and lo' and behold it was a certain pale boy who looked guilty. ‘What the hell was that?!’ Y/N whisper yelled, not wanting to alert Charlie who was only a couple rooms away. 

‘Sorry… I uh, can I come up?’ Edward mouthed, the security lights lit his face just enough for Y/N to read. The moon, illuminating his striking features.

‘Okay?’ Y/N hesitantly nodded, knowing that he could very well choose to just come back when she was asleep. She stepped back from the window and waited on her bed. A small, easy to miss thwump sounded outside her window as two familiar hands appeared, gripping her windowsill.

As Edward pulled himself up easily, Y/N made herself busy, tucking herself into bed, covering her legs with her blanket.

‘Can you close the window? I turned on the heater, it’s kinda cold. Make sure to close it when you leave too.’ Y/N pulled out her copy of the book they would be studying this year and waited for Edward to speak.

‘I just wanted to make sure you were okay.’ The boy stood, somewhat uncomfortably. ‘Y’know with your head and all.’ He gestured to Y/N with his hand, looking extremely nervous. His face was taut, full lips pulled back in a thin line.

‘I’m fine Edward, but thanks for checking up on me. I appreciate it. And thank you again for saving me.’ Y/N nodded, giving him a relaxed smile ‘Um, feel free to sit?’ She gestured to the end of her bed.

‘Right,’ He relaxed a bit, settling himself down on the edge of her bed. ‘I was thinking. How about we decide on a day for you to come see Rosalie and the rest of the family?’ He gave her a wavering grin. Knowing Edward, he was probably thinking something morbid about eternal damnation and what not. He was quite the moody character.

‘I mean sure, but couldn’t we talk about this at school tomorrow?’ Y/N raised her eyebrows, slightly confused as to why he needed to talk to her tonight.

‘Um, tomorrow is Saturday.’ Edward began slowly, now looking at her with concern again. ‘Are you sure your head is okay?’ He leaned forward, reaching out his hand to place on her forehead. 

‘Man that's cold.’ Y/N wrinkled her nose at the contact. ‘How have people not figured you guys out yet? You guys are pale as heck, super conventionally attractive and feel freezing to the touch.’ Y/N let out a chuckle, batting Edwards hand away from her forehead. She set down her book, abandoning her idea of reading before bed.

‘Well, we make it a habit to stay away from other people.’

‘I see. Okay well, when do you think is a good day to meet your family?’ Y/N grabbed a pillow, squishing it against herself.

‘I’ll be away tomorrow hu- I mean, eating.’ Edward grimaced.

‘Hunting? Bears and stuff right?’ Y/N nodded along, resting her chin atop her pillow. ‘Y’know you should practice talking to humans more often. It’s no wonder you’re slipping up.’ She smirked. ‘ “I’ll be away the whole day eating.” Is not a sentence one commonly uses in human conversation.’ She snickered, throwing her pillow at Edward to which he caught easily.

‘Right, sorry.’ He gave her a sheepish grin, settling the pillow down on his lap. 

‘So, a vampire huh?’ Y/N looked at him with a blank stare. ‘What do I smell like?’ 

Edward’s eyebrow twitched slightly at her question, ‘Vampire? You came to a conclusion quickly. It’s only been a day.’ Narrowly avoiding her question.

‘Well I know for a fact you aren’t spiderman. He’s at least nice.’ Y/N shrugged. ‘And don't you avoid my questions. It doesn’t work on me.’ She kicked him slightly, under her blanket. Edward let out a surprised chuckle, not flinching at her sudden attack.

‘Okay well, you’re right. We would be considered vampires. I was thinking Sunday? You can come over if you’d like and we can explain all the details there?’ He gave her a hopeful smile, handing Y/N’s pillow back to her.

‘Yeah sure! What time were you thinking? Charlie will be away in the morning to go pick up his daughter, her plane got delayed by the snow.’ Y/N hummed, not wanting to push her questions on him.

‘I can come pick you up too just as he’s leaving. I think it’d make him feel better. He’s not too uh, fond of me?’ He gave her a cheeky grin. Edward remembered the emotions he heard in Charlie's mind when he placed his hand on Y/N's shoulder in front of the Chief.

‘Duh, boy and girl together? Charlie is a father. I can’t blame him for his instincts. He doesn't know that you have no interest in me.’ Y/N shrugged, leaning back against her headboard head in her arms. This was nice, Edward wasn’t in a perpetually sombre demeanour. It was a welcome change from what she knew in the books. Y/N gave a small smile, peeking up at him through her arms. Edwards black eyes were glinting. His lips were carved into a smile, one with an emotion she couldn’t place. 

‘Okay well, I’ll see you on Sunday then!’ Y/N nodded, sliding into bed, raising the covers to her shoulders.

‘What, are you gonna stay and watch me sleep?’ She teased, nosing her face into her pillow with a cheeky grin. Edward was stunlocked, eyes bug wide and jaw slack. 

‘I uh, I wasn’t going to. That’s not what I was thinking!-’ If the seventeen year old boy could still blush, his cheeks would be blazing cherry red. 

‘I’m just teasing you. Go home Edward, go do your thing. I'll still be here come Sunday. Don’t miss me too much, yeah?’ Y/N rolled her eyes, clicking off her bedside lamp. ‘Turn off the lights for me? And close the window when you go okay?’ 

‘Um, if i-’

‘You’re cute, but not cute enough to be watching me sleep. Go home.’ 

‘I was going to ask if you wanted me to bring you back something.’ His tone was embarrassed and indignant, his lower lip jutting out slightly.

‘Edward, what could you bring back from a hunting trip?’ Y/N looked at him quizzically, options flashing by in her mind.

‘Flowers?’ 

‘Y’know what Ed? If you find a pretty rock in a river, bring that back. Then maybe I’ll let you watch me sleep.’ She snickered, closing her eyes. ‘Good night!’

‘I WASN’T GOING TO!’ He let out in a hushed cry, his small, boyish grin, giving away his amusement.

As Edward turned to leave, Y/N, blinked her eyes open and called out his name once more.

'Hey Edward?'

'Yes?'

"I'm not afraid of you or what you are. If you were a bad person, you wouldn't have saved me.' She looked at him with a firm expression, sending a pang into Edwards unbeating heart.

'That being said, if you watch me sleep without my permission I will find a wooden stake.' Y/N grinned, breaking the tension easily.

'So that means at some point I will have permission?' Edward cheeked, already half way through the window.

‘Night!~’ Y/N sing-songed, rolling over to face the other side of her bed. She heard her window give a soft thump as it closed. That night, Y/N dreamt of red cloaks, black smoke, Wolves and the Cullen's.

The morning could not come faster.

And yet somehow, the dawn came and Saturday began in a cold sweat.

Saturday morning was spent reassuring Charlie that, 

Y/N was safe, no repercussions of the incident had severely injured her other than her shoulder being slightly bruised.

Bella’s plane delay wasn’t too big a deal and that the car coming from Billy Black today would still be in the same shape as it would be tomorrow.

‘Okay but if it hurts you'll let me know.’ He insisted.

‘Yes!’

‘And do you think Bella will like the truck?’ His doe-eyes were soft and begging. From what Y/N remembered, Bella probably got her eyes from him. If Y/N was a bit older…

‘I haven't seen the truck yet, show me!’ She smiled, ending her train of thought quickly. Nearing the front door, she heard the growling of a truck engine, spluttering its way to sleep.

The pair stepped outside, spotting the old 1953 Red Chevy. Y/N had assumed that the truck was in the garage since Charlie parked his cruiser on the street. Huh, this was a little different. Though it made sense, there had been a few inconsistencies in Fork since Y/N had arrived. 

‘Hey! You must be Y/N. Besides Bella’s imminent arrival, Charlie hasn’t shut up about you either!’ Billy gave a fatherly smile, reaching out his hand to shake. Y/N shook his hand, grinning somewhat proudly.

‘I hope I met your expectations sir.’ 

‘No need for that, call me Billy. This is my son Jacob.’ Billy jerked his thumb to point at his son who was still looking at the truck. Billy once again gave her a reassuring grin, and ushered Y/N over to Jacob's direction.

‘Hey!’ Y/N walked over to Jacob, who had waved at her somewhat awkwardly. She let Charlie and Billy catch up with each other.

‘Uh, hey. I’m Jacob.’ He smiled nervously, wringing his hands together. His deep-set twinkling eyes were darting around her form. He really did have the most lovely raven black hair and russet skin. Y/N could understand why Bella had trouble deciding between the two. Besides, she was what, seventeen at the time? Could you really blame her.

‘I’m Y/N. Bet you were disappointed to see me huh? Bella’s coming tomorrow, her plane got delayed.’ She explained, giving him a rueful grin. Jacob however, shook his head, hands waving rapidly in protest. 

‘Oh, no! Not at all! I’m thrilled to meet you! You look great!’ 

Y/N raised her eyebrows with mirth.

 ‘No! I don’t think you look- I mean, you seem great?’ He supplied, looking more nervous now than ever. His tone was now flighty with panic. He was cute. Beautiful even.

Y/N chuckled, punching his arm gently, ‘You sure about that? Sounded more like a question to me.’

‘I just meant that, I’m not disappointed to meet you instead of Bella.’ He sighed, looking sheepish. Damn, a lot of men were looking sheepish lately, Y/N made a mental note. Deciding to cut him some slack, she relented.

‘I know, just messing with ya.’ She laughed, nudging him with her shoulder. ‘Come on, tell me about the car. It looks pretty munted but Charlie said it runs pretty well?’ Y/N gave him a go ahead gesture, to which Jacob launched into a full scaled detail of how he rebuilt the car engine. His long black hair bobbed along with him as enthusiastically gestured to the engine.

‘Alright, kids, Billy has more chores to do in town and I want to show Y/N around town before Bella comes. I wanted to do it yesterday but.’ He trailed off looking guilty.

‘It wasn’t your fault Charlie. It wouldn’t have mattered if you were there or not.’ Y/N said firmly, placing a hand on his shoulder shaking her head.

‘Wait, she was the one in the car crash yesterday?’ Jacob looked upset, stepping forward from leaning against the truck. ‘What?’ 

‘Yeah, some guy. He skidded into me. It was a whole thing. Look guys, the point is I’m fine now.’ She pouted, arms crossing. ‘Now let’s hit the road, I want some breakfast.’ 

Jacob and Billy had joined them for breakfast at The Lodge. It seemed that Charlie had wanted to take Y/N there after school that day but the incident had happened. The waitress had been surprised that it was she and not Bella who had arrive with the group but Y/N quickly reassured her that Bella would be arriving the next day. And with that, breakfast came and went. It was satisfying and Y/N had been given the peach cobbler to try. It was in fact, absolutely delicious. By all means, Y/N called it a successful day.

With Charlie gone back to the police station in the afternoon after dropping Y/N back at the house (to her insistence). Y/N could finally mentally debrief herself. It seemed as though she had take on the role of the main character instead of Bella. This indeed was quite concerning for many reasons. The main thing Y/N was currently frazzled over was the self declared fact that Edward and Jacob held pretty much no attraction to her.

Adding to that matter, Edward didn't answer Y/N's question of how her blood smelt. What if he found her revolting. It would explain why he looked like he had been punched the first time he saw her. Could humans smell revolting to vampires?

As Y/N continued to spiral down a pit of what-ifs and what-nots. The sun had begun to set. She had wasted an entire day worrying over things she couldn't control and it had not at all made her feel better. Trudging upstairs to her room she nudged open her door and slumped into her desk chair, groaning.

'What seems to be the issue?' The musical voice of Edward came from her window.

'How in the-' Y/N sat pin straight. 'When did you get back?' She turned around, standing up to greet him, half confused and half surprised.

'Well we left as soon as I got home from your house so we've had more than enough time to uh, eat.' He chuckled, still supporting his upper body with his arms, crossed on her windowsill.

'Um, do you want to come in? I mean honestly, you could have just rung the door bell.' Y/N deadpanned, still happy that he at least waited for her inviation. Y/N stood back as Edward hoisted himself up.

'I brought this back for you?' He smiled, revealing his perfect teeth. 'I went fishing around for it.' Edward pulled out a rough edged, pastel pinkish stone from his pocket with a proud grin.

'Oh my goodness!' Y/N laughed, looking at him with complete astonishment. 'It's gorgeous! Did you really find it from a riverbed?'

'Here, Edward gently grasped Y/N's wrist and placed the rock on her flat palm. 'It's rose quartz and yes I really did find it in the riverbed. You said you wanted a rock.' He looked eager, as if waiting for praise. Not dislike a puppy asking for treats.

'It's lovely Edward, you really didn't have to. Thank you so much.' She placed her newfound gemstone onto her nightstand gently. 'Wow, we're quite early on in our friendship for gift giving.' She laughed, sitting down on her bed, gesturing for him to sit as well.

'I really was joking though, I'm not the kind of person who really enjoys gifts. Don't go out of your way for me. I don't want to be an inconvenience.' She gave him a rather sad smile. 'I wasn't even able to give you anything back. I'm sorry.'

Edward in turn, shifted closer to her, poking at her forehead. 'I didn't do it because I wanted anything in return. I just thought it would be nice.' He sighed, sitting back into his place.

‘I wanted to thank you for.. Well for telling me you weren’t afraid of me.’ His eyes were trained on Y/n’s but it looked as if he was far away. Deep in a bygone era that Y/N would have never seen. 

‘Wow, you really are an emo huh?’ Y/N gave him a little grin, handing him one of her pillows. 

‘Y’know you’re so pretty that most people wouldn’t think someone like you would have such…’ She paused, looking to the side for an answer. ‘Such self deprecating thoughts. I mean, you cringed when you saved me.’ She squinted, looking at him in reflection.

‘Did you regret saving me?’ Y/N rested her chin on her open palm, looking at Edward with confusion.

‘No. I didn’t. I do not.’ The boy answered immediately, looking affronted. Placing the pillow in his lap, smoothing it over with his hands.

‘Then why did you look like you were in pain?’ She asked him in a docile tone. Y/N knew she was pushing his boundaries. Bella had always asked questions upfront and Edward had always avoided them.

‘I can’t.’ Edward growled out, one hand gripping the cotton sheets on Y/N’s bed, eyes cast downwards. 

‘Hey, you can choose not to answer.’ She quickly placed a cautiously gentle hand on his enclosed fist. ‘Just, don’t mess up my bed sheets okay? I can’t ask Charlie for new ones so soon.’ She tried to joke.

‘I will tell you Y/N. But I just can’t tell you right now. I’m…’ He gritted out, looking at her with an emotion that Y/N could only describe as desperation. His hand was shaking with restraint. Y/N remained oblivious to this.

‘Hey, okay. We can talk again tomorrow. If talking to me is too much, I understand.’ She nodded understandingly. ‘Opening up to someone is difficult. Furthermore, I’d say opening up to someone so quickly is kind of.. Well… scary.’ Y/N remarked, sitting back on her headboard.

‘Thanks for listening. I don’t think… You just kind of make it hard to not tell you.’ Edward muttered, with a tone of reluctance.

‘Hey, I’ve been told I’m a good listener. It is one of my many redeeming qualities.’ She quipped, shrugging her shoulders.

‘I'm sure that there are quite a few of those.’ Edward replied smoothly. ‘How is your shoulder by the way? And your head?’ He asked hopefully.

‘One? Flattery will get you nowhere with me. Pretty faces do not sway me easily. Two? I’m okay! My shoulder still feels a bit funny when I lift things but I can just shift onto another arm. I've got two of ‘em.’ She splayed out her arms in a show of attempted dexterity which failed when she winced slightly.

‘I see.’ Edward’s eyes looked stormy, staring at her injured shoulder.

‘Hey, if you hadn’t knocked me over. It would have been the car that knocked me over. I prefer being pinned under a boy than a van, okay?’ She nudged him with her fist. Attempting to bring him out of his potential self loathing spiral.

‘Maybe if i hadn’t said what i said to you. You wouldn’t have been in such a rush to lea-’ 

‘Would have, should have, could have. If my father had two wheels he’d be a bike. There’s no use in lingering in the past. Unless you have a special talent where you can turn back the time.’ Y/N raised her eyebrow.

‘No thats not what I can do.’ He sighed, shaking his head.

‘What can you do?’ She probed, already knowing the answer but wanting to see if Edward would be willing to divulge his secret.

‘Well, I.. I can hear thoughts. I can read minds.’ He began, looking up at her. ‘But, you? I can’t hear a thing. Not only that, when you…’ He paused, eyes flickering as he recollected his memories.

‘Yesterday when you looked at me and frowned, you completely drowned out my ability to hear everyone.’ Edward looked incredulous. ‘It was only for a second but it was when you looked extremely panicked.’ 

‘Huh?’ Y/N’s jaw dropped at his revelation. ‘So you can read minds but not mine?’ 

‘Yes. It’s not altogether unnatural. I mean, Chief Swan’s mind is somewhat blurry to me. But to completely block me out and block out others from me?’ I haven’t ever experienced it before.’ He finished.

‘Huh, so vampires have special abilities. I was only guessing but I guess thats the gist of it?’ She asked, somewhat intrigued as if it were new information.

‘Yes. There are many gifts and talents, we’ll explain more to you tomorrow but-’ Edward sat up straighter (if that were possible), cutting himself off.

‘What?’ Y/N blinked, looking at her door.

‘Chief Swan is coming home. He’ll be here in a few minutes.’ He said, grinning at her guiltily. 'He probably won't be happy to find me here without permission huh?’ Edward gave her a look.

‘Hm, I’d say you’re right.’ She attempted to push him off her bed. ‘Time for you to go Mr Cullen.’ She teased, looking up at Edward. The boy, in turn, looked down at her with a fond smile that she did not understand. 

‘I’ll see you tomorrow Y/N.’ I’ll pick you up at nine?’ He made his way to Y/N’s bedroom window, foot on the windowsill.

‘Yeah, go! Before He catches you! I’m pretty sure he has a gun.’ Y/N mumbled, attempting to push Edward uselessly out the window. 

‘Until tomorrow my lady!’ He jested, letting the girl move him into the opening.

‘Yes sir, I bid thee adieu.’ Y/N grunted, with a final shove, Edward was out the window and landing softly on the ground. Just in time too. Charlie’s car was scratchily rolling through the gravel of the front driveway.

‘Go!’ She whisper-yelled, knowing he could hear her. To which Edward just gave a silent laugh and waved, before disappearing off into the night. Had they been talking that much that the sun had long since said its goodbyes to the horizon?

[shitpostingkats]

Obviously, the most important mystery in Neo: The World Ends With You is why there is a seemingly random dating sim gacha game character who bears an uncanny resemblance to Sho Minamimoto.

Here are my theories, ranked from least to most funny.

It's a complete coincidence. Sho Minamimoto, for reasons unknown even to Angels, just happens to have the face of a conventionally attractive man. Deeply cursed.

Minamimoto's just collected enough ambient Vibes that he can passively affect the RG, similar to the trend mechanics, and this is simply how it manifests. You wear enough D+B in the afterlife, people start wearing it in the real world. You get your head crushed by a vending machine thrown by a local death god, you get a video game character designed off you.

Someone deliberately Imprinted the game designer with Minamimoto's face when they were making characters. Why anyone would want to do this is also a mystery, but a different one.

Neku wearing that hat caused some really weird side effects.

Some bystander saw Minamimoto's failed shooting of Joshua in Udagawa, and his swagless homicidal attempts and actively bleeding gunshot wound captivated them utterly, and they went straight home that night and started drafting up a dating simulator.

[moon-ayyye]

Worst fandom mischaracterisation/headcanon of each bat-associated character, in my opinion (these are in no particular order) :

1. Duke Thomas is the sane, rational, "normal" one.

Have you ever read the We Are Robin arc? Duke is fucking unhinged, his introduction was him jumping off a bridge to escape cops. This is a kid whose father is immortal and is the first metahuman in the batfam. He lost his parents in the most horrendous way possible (joker venom. They're still alive, but it's horrifying) and organised a whole gang as a child. He threw down with a green lantern and 2 shot his ass. Hopefully, this headcanon is just a product of people not really knowing the character and goes away soon once people find out more about him, when he isn't just the token black guy in a fic or a background character in batfam drama.

2. Stephanie Brown is quirky and sassy, and ONLY quirky and sassy. She's over her trauma with Black Mask and Cluemaster!!

Stephanie Brown is a very interesting character, with an origin story that is very similar to jason todd. She's been through hell, yet she constantly gets infantalised by the fandom, which gets kind of ignored in favour of talking shit about how people infantilse tim (super valid and I'll come back to it later on in this post). You most commonly see this in timsteph stories where they show her as the immature first love, and how as tim grows up, he needs to date more "serious" people, as if tim wasn't the main reason their relationship never worked. This is also common in stephcass fics, although on a smaller level. Writers tend to make stephanie the bubbly outgoing girl that balances out all of cass' angst (some of those fics are really good, but they mould steph in a specific shape so she can be a prop for cass to heal). On an even smaller scale, I've seen both romantic and platonic jaysteph stories where stephanie appears as the "good" victim who let go of her animosity to black mask and cluemaster, and so now, she can help jason let go of what happened with the joker, and bruce's abuse. Obviously, this is a disservice to both of these characters, but people tend to focus on how it's more of a disservice to jason instead of steph. Let my girl express her trauma and heal, and stop using her as a prop for other characters! She wasn't just cutesy as robin, she threw the fuck down. Her introduction included hitting tim in the head with a brick!

3. Slut/himbo Dick Grayson is reductive of his abilities as a leader, and is not only offensive to real survivors of SA, but incredibly racist towards Romani people.

Do I really need to explain this one? Dick Grayson is a symbol of hope that bruce wishes batman could be. This man is a natural born leader and has stepped up to the plate multiple times, both during his time with the titans and as batman. He's charismatic and lovable and a genuinely intelligent man, but for some reason, he gets depicted as a dumbass who has to deffer to bruce or tim or babs any time he has an issue with detective work. Yes, you can delegate. Of course, you can delegate, but going straight to tim and rattling off the case you JUST accepted doesn't make sense, ESPECIALLY if you're on seperate cases and tim or bruce have to postpone their work just to solve it for you. As for the other part, Dick has been heavily implied to be demisexual, given that he only has sex with people he has genuine feelings for. He wouldn't just sleep with any random woman who compliments his ass enough. Also, having an SA victim be characterised as a slut is both reductive of their trauma and a weird way that some authors justify how he's "over it." Really doesn't help that he was slut shamed (canonically!! why is this canon??) by the rest of the titans after sleeping with mirage, who pretended to be kori. Additionally, it's really weird if the first thing you think of when you see an attractive romani man just sleeps around. People don't say that about other conventionally attractive characters, even ones who HAVE slept around. The only character i can think of that gets characterised like this is bruce, but that's an image that he cultivated to keep batman hidden.

4. Jason Todd was always doomed by the narrative. He would have died if bruce hadn't intervened. Also, pit rage.

The tragedy of jason todd was, and always has been, that he was doomed by the AUDIENCE. He wasn't just an angry, reckless child, and calling him the angry robin is stupid and reductive. Was he angry? of course he was, but so was dick, and so was damian. Using a single word to describe a person is never going to be enough. Jason was notoriously compassionate to victims, especially women and children, and sex abuse victims. He got pissed when the system he was asked to believe in was shown to be ineffective, to the point where bruce believed he killed a man over it. The kid had a bright future ahead and loved school, modt of robin!jason's shitty qualities came from bruce and alfred compartmentaling his image and shitting on him to ease their guilt over his death. Pit rage is also a cheap way to take away his autonomy, an easy pass to explain the shitty things he's done. I like it when the pit has side effects like glowing eyes or increased healing or something, but pit rage is stupid. It's either used to force characters to forgive jason since he wasn't himself or as an angst prompt for jason, another testament to how he came back wrong, or a way to have him hurt a character to further up THEIR angst (*cough* titans tower AU fics*cough*). Yes, he did shitty things. Let him do shitty things without giving him an easy out. Otherwise, your story isn't compelling at all.

5. Feral Damian Wayne is just straight-up racist, no?

I love damian. I think that, for the most part, he's been written pretty well. However, damian suffers from the fact that he's an arab character in a post 9/11 comic, and thus there is bound to be some casual racism, both in comics (like when tim assumed he was too uncivilised to know what a handshake is) and fandom. Has damian wayne done a lot of shitty things, especially to tim? Yes, absolutely. But that doesn't make him feral. He was raised by assassins as the heir to the throne and to the greatest hero in the world, raised to think that blood relations are the only ones that matter, so of course he's dismissive of tim. He's also a prince who was raised in luxury, who was born as royalty and has experienced more opulence during his birth thsn most peoole do in a lifetime, although this opulence is extremely conditional, with horrifying requirements (the story with damian having a metal spine as a child is insane). Does it make what he did to tim right? Definitely not. Does it excuse his actions? Also no. But it does explain them, it tells us where it came from. Being traumatised and having extremely high expectations of both sides of your family doesn't make you feral.

6. Tim Drake is just a small little baby who can't function without his coffee.

Let me preface this by saying that i don't like tim drake. At all. As a huge fan of the al ghuls it was a real kick in the balls having Ra's be reduced to a creepy pedophile who wanted tim as an heir, and sent a woman to rape tim in order to carry his child. Also, I hate how DC decided to prop him up by shitting on jason todd. However, this doesn't mean that I don't enjoy his YJ run and that I don't enjoy some of his comics/fics. That being said, nothing on this earth pisses me off more than tim stans. You know the ones, the people who want damian hanged, who want dick and jason and bruce to fall to their knees and beg for forgiveness. Tim has been through an insane amount of trauma, and that's understandable, but please, for the love of god, don't create more whump for tim at the cost of other characters. You can hate damian, I wouldn't blame you, but remember that he's like 10 and tim put him on a hit list. Dick never wanted to put tim in arkham, and he didn't have time to support tim when it came to an honestly insane (although ultimately correct) conclusion. Also damian as robin was alfred's idea, and damian was the one that put on the costume preemptively, dick got pissed at damian for that. When it comes to jason, I'd say it's complicated. While titans tower was fucked up, it wasn't as bad as people made it out to be. My first introduction to the fandom was through jason todd since he was my favourite robin, and then i learned they brought him back to life when i played injustice. The number of fics and posts that mention that jason went to the tower specifically to kill tim is insane. When i got into comics, it was like whiplash; it wasn't a one-sided beatdown, tim was conscious until the end, the goofy ass robin suit jason had on, jason never slitting tim's throat (that happens in hush, and even then i don't think he really slit his throat, since the art shows that the skin was kinda nicked), all of that was wild to me. BftC is one of the shittiest comjc book runs when it comes to characterisation in general, and I've already discussed dick and tim, so it's only fair to talk about jason and tim. There's no justification here, honestly, other than shitty writing i guess. The other side of the coin is enemies to caretaker jason and tim, which is so fucking wild?? they're like 2 years apart, and tim is extremely competent, he wouldn't pass out mid patrol because he forgot his coffee.

7. Bruce Wayne doesn't believe people can change and doesn't care about Crime Alley.

For the first one, please fucking read a single comic book. Just one. Better yet, maybe research why batman doesn't kill. You know, the most popular thing about him? As for the second, it's mostly just a way to show how jason is better than bruce and how he's right to take over the alley since no one cares about it. Now I LOVE jason todd. He's my favourite comic book character of all time tied with gambit and Dr. Strange. But I hate it when you create angst or comeuppance by blatantly ignoring the chatacter and their motives. Bruce became batman so that what happened to his parents can never happen again, and this includes helping the poor people in crime alley either through patrolling there or by setting up countless charities to improve life there. You can make the case that batman avoided crime alley after jason died. It's not canon, but it would make sense. However, I dont see him ever giving up on the alley, both to prevent what happened to his parents, and to help people like his dead son. I fucking hate bruce, he's done a lot of shitty things, but making shit up just to make him worse is getting old.

8. Misc

There aren't really enough mischaracterisations about cass and babs to warrant separate paragraphs, so I'll just reiterate the infantalisation of cass and babs having no qualities outside of oracle, master hacker, and dick grayson's on and off lover.

[olderthannetfic]

/olderthannetfic/769334704445997057/another-fandometrics-year-in-review-another-bevy

I am - genuinely - very sympathetic to the frustrations of solely f/f shippers and I DO think some people are a little too quick to shrug off the lack of f/f in fandom spaces with “lack of representation in media what can you do” when fandom is all about assigning personalities and backstories to one-line characters. HOWEVER. As someone who likes all kinds of ships, the experiences I have had across many MANY fandoms with solely f/f shippers treating people who also liked the main m/m ship as traitors and bad feminists, not to mention the number of people who have told me, a trans man, that I HAVE to write more f/f and less m/m For The Sisterhood, has made me LESS likely to engage in f/f, not more. Some of y’all are your own worst enemy when it comes to this stuff I swear. (Hashtag not all femslashers, hashtag some of my best friends are femslashers, etc)

--

Demands that people defend and explain perfectly commonplace things always end up generating dumber and dumber explanations.

I agree that that explanation by itself is kind of weak, but "Why are you asking only about AO3?" (as people often are) plus representation problems plus the other commonly cited reasons add up to a perfectly sufficient explanation. People just don't like what they're hearing.

--

The kind of f/f fandom people are often looking for—a by cis wlw, for cis wlw one—is not that different in size from the by cis mlm, for cis mlm one. They are both small.

Yes, I know they pretend that's not what they mean. They are lying. Possibly to themselves. Just look at the bawwwwing over the idea that cis men liking f/f could add to the amount of f/f art or the audience for the same.

Many AO3 slashers are better compared to transbian catgirls making lesbian furry porn or cis dudes horny for Buffy/Faith or something. There are plenty of people who care about f/f. They're just not necessarily the ~right~ people in the right spaces making the right art to count in some wanker's statistics.

Part of the reason our explanations and discussions always sound so bonkers is that we constantly compare apples to oranges.

--

And while we're at it, let's talk about that hoary old ~one-line character~ thing.

The reality is that we like to talk about how we elevate random walk-on characters, but the vast majority of shippy AO3 fanfic is about fairly major characters. Clint/Coulson was bizarrely popular in 2012. It has been twelve years. It is time to get over it.

On top of most things focusing on leads, the focus is often on characters who are given a lot of interiority. The audience is invited to be in their head and care about their feelings. People aren't usually good at analyzing film, so they use more familiar metrics involving text: how many lines do they have in the script? How many minutes does that translate to on screen? They don't know how to quantify a character being treated as an object to be looked at beyond "Booty shorts bad". But it's not general sex appeal or amount of skin on display that matters here.

As audiences, we respond to film grammar and "Just happen to like" or not like some character as a result of it, but we aren't aware of the mechanics, so we can't explain why beyond vague spluttering and "How dare you! Everyone should think this because it's the natural response!"

In general, media with multiple central women who have intense relationships with each other and who are conventionally attractive generate plenty of interest in f/f. Media with one hot girl who has the camera trained on her ass all the time while the men do everything interesting usually don't.

It's a no brainer and the harebrained explanations come from trying to look deeper to find the secret conspiracy where there is none.

--

The biggest mistake of most of this dumb discourse is "But I see all these queer women here. Why isn't there more f/f?"

This presupposes some default "normal" level of f/f without any actual justification for why that would be expected. You see the same nonsense from people going "Why is there so much m/m?"

What's the default? 10% because of the fake statistic that 10% of people are gay? 75% because action movies are sausagefests and all the important relationships are between men? What's the "normal" level of femslash? 25% because f/f, f/m, m/m, and gen are all equally valid? 80% because lots of fanfic writers are women?

Chasing one precise number is a fool's errand, but building a whole theory on the idea that there's an implicit number without even digging into that assumption is more foolish still.

When you look at the fanfic (or art!) spaces that are full of dudes, they often look like a bit of a mirror of AO3. Lots of het still. Lots of f/f. Lots of lady blorbos people are obsessed with. Limited m/m. Depending on the space, there might be a lot more gen. It's not perfectly 1:1, but then AO3 isn't precisely like other chick-heavy fanfic spaces anyway.

--

In my experience, the thing that makes a blorbo take off is that they're fairly major in canon, often driving the narrative even if they aren't the main protagonist, and they show up early.

In the cases where they weren't there at the very beginning, them showing up was the catalyst for fans who like this type of character to get into the canon at all. It's not just Castiel: you see it with Methos from Highlander and plenty of others. It's usually in a context where that fandom didn't have that much established for this type of fan. There wasn't a second dude to pair the lead with or the ship turned some people off or something. Highlander, for example, had fucktons of het shippers, both of canon het and of various OFCs and canon dudes. It was the slashers who stampeded over there when friends told them there was new ship potential for m/m. SPN... Sam/Dean was very popular on LJ, but I think it's obvious why a viable non-brother ship was of interest to people. I watched tons of people get pimped into Teen Wolf for Sterek. Of course they ended up liking it and not really caring about other ships: they were pre-selected to like that specific vibe. (And they are all wrong because Scott is the best and Derek has weird teeth.) The same thing happens with f/f. People get into media all the time because they're promised such-and-such a ship dynamic.

Wynonna Earp had plenty of people who were there for the women because the women are who matter for the most part. People were super into the canon f/f because it's hot and because it didn't seem like they were just going to get hit by a bus and shooed out of the narrative.

How many things that everybody and their sister saw have that many main women who matter? Some, definitely, but they're outnumbered by the sausagefests and by the things with very central het. Not everything with a huge audience gets a big fanfic fandom, but most things with big fanfic fandoms do have a big audience. You need critical mass to make a fandom happen.

Something like MCU has a variety of tasty shipping options, but the characters it spent all its time on first were the small selection of guys fandom cares the most about. When other characters were established very early, they also had an early spurt of fandom. I can't be the only one who remembers Pepperony fandom on LJ. It wasn't just people tagging canon ships in the background: Pepper/Tony shippers were a whole thing.

Yes, there are exceptions, but we make a big deal of them while ignoring the overall pattern.

Again, it is time to get over Clint/Coulson, Arthur/Eames, and people hallucinating that Hux had a personality in that first movie.

These are rare exceptions, and they're all snark-based at that. Darcy Lewis was also obnoxiously popular based solely on a few lines of snark, but that didn't count because she wasn't the correct and virtuous choice of favorite female character.

(Seriously, you should have seen the whining about all the people horny for Darcy who didn't give a fuck about boring Jane. Sorry, but your blorbo is a snooze and mine has amazing tits in addition to being funny.)

--

Let's go look at what's big on AO3 since it's easy and that's what other lazy statistics compilers do and then base their whining on:

Looking at the M/M tag, here's the sidebar:

Castiel/Dean Winchester (111856)

Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (70823)

Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski (70134)

Sherlock Holmes/John Watson (67796)

James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers (61397)

Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) (56548)

Minor or Background Relationship(s) (55109)

Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (49179)

Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku (46679)

Steve Rogers/Tony Stark (44754)

I'm seeing canons with huge audiences. Teen Wolf and SPN are way more popular in fanfic fandom, relatively speaking, but they're certainly not obscure media.

I'm seeing a lot of leads. Sirius/Remus does stand out a little: they aren't walk-ons, but fanon did elevate them. Same with Draco, but main protagonist/most obvious nemesis is hardly a surprising ship type.

Let's play with exclude filters and see what's next (numbers won't be exact since this is via excluding the previous batches):

Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson (43234)

Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian (40115)

Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V (38398)

Keith/Lance (Voltron) (32757)

Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) (32744)

Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester (31834)

Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) (31527)

Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin) (31011)

Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter (30819)

Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood (30133)

Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson (27403)

Original Male Character/Original Male Character (26854)

Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou (26854)

Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin (26454)

Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov (26453)

Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF) (21154)

Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion (20946)

James T. Kirk/Spock (20716)

Min Yoongi | Suga/Park Jimin (20561)

Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet (20113)

Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru (20039)

Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio (18806)

Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel (18013)

Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier (17577)

Dan Howell/Phil Lester (17518)

Levi Ackerman/Eren Yeager (17404)

Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know (17390)

Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou (17141)

Tartaglia | Childe/Zhongli (Genshin Impact) (17041)

Harry Potter/Severus Snape (16773)

Oh look: more leads.

Sure, there are some little oddities, like the fact that taekook is obviously the worst BTS ship and it is a personal attack on me that it is that popular. But come the fuck on: this is a parade of some of the most famous musicians and most popular anime, shows that had huge audiences and particularly huge audiences of the type that like fanfic.

Let's have a look at f/m:

Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug (33773)

Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy (33031)

Original Female Character(s)/Original Male Character(s) (29586)

Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren (24192)

Minor or Background Relationship(s) (21606)

James Potter/Lily Evans Potter (21088)

Kylo Ren/Rey (16028)

James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader (15922)

Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley (15635)

Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (15335)

Pepper Potts/Tony Stark (14552)

Fox Mulder/Dana Scully (14214)

Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin (13616)

Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson (11471)

Oliver Queen/Felicity Smoak (11383)

Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Emma Swan (11272)

Castiel/Dean Winchester (11187)

Other Relationship Tags to Be Added (10529)

Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov (9750)

Original Character(s)/Original Character(s) (9736)

Okay, it is AO3 after all, so some m/m ships have snuck in there, but the general trend is still leads, leads, leads, now with some readerfic. (For James/Lily, you can blame the insanity that is Marauders fandom on TikTok, or so I hear.)

And f/f:

Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor (21520)

Original Female Character(s)/Original Female Character(s) (17873)

Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan (16168)

Minor or Background Relationship(s) (13681)

Clarke Griffin/Lexa (12876)

Adora/Catra (She-Ra) (11532)

Amity Blight/Luz Noceda (10880)

Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (10532)

Caitlyn/Vi (League of Legends) (8925)

Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long (7766)

Robin Buckley/Nancy Wheeler (7369)

Korra/Asami Sato (7146)

Wednesday Addams/Enid Sinclair (6720)

Other Relationship Tags to Be Added (6684)

Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught (5764)

Original Character(s)/Original Character(s) (5529)

Chloe Beale/Beca Mitchell (5347)

Laura Hollis/Carmilla Karnstein (4895)

Jirou Kyouka/Yaoyorozu Momo (4662)

Charlie Magne | Morningstar/Vaggie (4402)

Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan (4284)

Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer (4223)

Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam (3936)

Eve Polastri/Villanelle | Oksana Astankova (3876)

Maya Bishop/Carina DeLuca (3700)

Sister Beatrice/Ava Silva (3689)

Castiel/Dean Winchester (3664)

Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Chloe Price (3471)

Miranda Priestly/Andrea Sachs (3394)

Ruby Rose/Weiss Schnee (3324)

Carmilla might be a little obscure compared to some media, and some other ships have snuck in here, but again, we're seeing some fairly prominent canons and the leads or at least main cast who have intense relationships in those canons. If most fantasy tv shows were Once Upon a Time, all of AO3 might be awash in nothing but swanqueen and captainswan.

The big thing that one sees is simply that f/f fandom often revolves around different media, while m/m and f/m are more likely to be into the same stuff that's full, full, full of main dudes getting to do things with one woman who matters.

We do not, in general, elevate anybody.

Not unless some very talented writer leads the way first with a juicy longfic that establishes all the fanon.

We repeat the myth that we do because it suits a certain narrative about how creative and transformative fandom is—and another equally popular narrative about how the lack of ship A/B is a ~conspiracy~ to rob one of one's rightful overflowing feed trough of fic.

It's bullshit.

We write about leads.

[spellwell]

my neighbor; richard grayson.

dick grayson fluff one-shot

fluff; sfw

summary: Janet has lived across from the richest man in town and his son for years, but seeing as he’s the most popular kid at school they’ve never spoken. When Dick’s teacher tells him he can raise his grades or quit the football team, he’s paired with the smartest girl in school- Janet. After countless study sessions, a friendship begins to blossom. One night while walking home alone she is saved by the infamous Robin, Batman’s sidekick. She becomes infatuated with Robin and can’t seem to stop thinking about him. What happens when she finds out Dick, who she previously never saw herself with might have a secret?

warnings: none. cussing ig. just fluff

universe: random batman and robin

notes: this can be read as this girl Janet that I made up or you can pretend it’s you, totally up to you. either way I thought it was a cute idea :) enjoy. PLEASE SEND IN STORY REQUESTS!!!

words: 5.7k

Every day I wake up, and go to the same stupid school around all the same stupid classmates that I’ve known my entire life. Due to the high crime rate in Gotham, no body wants to move here, let alone bring their kids and enlist them into Gotham high. Not all of it’s bad, some of the people are better than others but one I can’t stand is Dick Grayson. Every day I sit here and watch as the girls in this class fall all over him, like he’s some kind of king. Sure, he’s conventionally attractive and plays football but what else does he do, really?

Last I heard he’s failing this class, and probably others, what kind of girl would want a guy with no brains?

“Foster! Grayson! Come and see me before the end of class.” The teacher’s crude tone interrupts my thoughts, causing my gaze to snap towards her direction. Just like she had manifested, the bell rings shortly after her announcement, a groan leaving my chest. I heard her correctly, my last name along with… his. I begrudgingly stand to my feet and shuffle in the direction of her desk, hearing Dick’s annoying voice ring as he says good bye to his many wives. Am I in trouble? Why would I be? I pay attention and get straight A’s, something Dick has never done in his life.

His presence beside me is oddly intimidating, but that quickly goes away once he opens his mouth. “What’s up teach? I gotta go to practice.” He says in a rushed tone, causing my eyes to roll. She gives him a stern look, like he’s not happy about what he’s about to hear. “Practice is none of your concern anymore, Richard. You are failing this class along with math, history.” She scans her computer screen and then looks back up at him. “The works Grayson. If you do not get these grades up by the end of this week, you will be cut from the team.” Her voice softens, trying to show him the severity of his situation. A giggle threatened to escape my lips, and it would have if she hadn’t looked at me next. “And you Ms. Foster, would be the perfect tutor.” My eyes fly into a saucer like shape, mouth agape. Dick opens his mouth before I can even think of a response. “So if Janet helps me study, and I pass, I can stay on the team?” His voice is hopeful, excited even.

“If she agrees to it, yes. Until you pass, you’re still cut from practice.” She looks back and forth between us, a sigh leaving my lips. “No, sorry.” I finally get the courage to look up at him. “I don’t have time.” I look back at the teacher with a pretend sad face and shake my head. “You’ll have to find someone else.” I know out of anyone in this class, my grades are the highest, but no way am I helping this jock pass any of his classes.

I begin to exit but Dick is close behind me. “Janet! Janet wait! What do you mean you don’t have time? Ya gotta help me, right?” I swear this guy is actually stupid! He’s been handed everything his entire life hasn’t he? Won’t get the memo. “I’m surprised you even know my name. I’m busy just like I said, sorry I can’t be more help.” I speed up my pace, but his pace simply begins to match my own. “Of course I know your name! We’re neighbors, we’ve been neighbors Janet, oh come on!” Not only am I surprised he knows my name, but that we live in the same neighborhood. I’ve watched this guy grow up, his rich dad always giving him anything and everything he wants, which is something I’ve never had. “Please.” He took my silence as another no, which it was. “Please, I’ll do anything. My dad can pay you, or I could! Oh- uh, I could take you to prom?” This causes me too groan in disgust as we approach the back doors of the school. “I said no, Dick!” My voices raises, hand almost to the door. Before I can reach it and escape, he fills the space between me and it, making me jump back. “Look, I know we’ve never been friends, but you’re super smart and I could really use your help…please?” I look up at him, watching his expression morph into the face he makes when he gets anything he could ever want. I sigh, tapping my foot on the ground. He looks so sad, hopeless even… plus he said please. Oh man, am I really about to say yes? My arms cross as another large sigh escapes my lungs. “Alright, I’ll help you study-“

“No way! Thanks Janet I really needed-“

“On one condition! We meet at your house every day after school for the next two weeks, excluding weekends. No flaking! This is my time you’re using here.”

He nods quickly like an excited dog. “Sounds great, yeah. We start tomorrow?” I nod back, accepting that answer, but refusing any kind of smile. Him on the other hand, has the largest grin iv’e ever seen. “And if you still fail, it’s not my fault! You can’t blame me.” He rolls his eyes in a playful manner. “Yeah, yeah. Thanks again, Janet!” He turns to run away, looking back in my direction one last time.

“Oh and Janet, that was two conditions, not one.”

-

It’s Friday and unfortunately my school day isn’t quite over. Sure I get to leave this building, but it’s the first day of tutoring Grayson. Now I get to leave here and go over to the Wayne mansion, where my new student lives. I was surprised to learn that I actually exist to him. In middle school I moved here with my parents, never having many friends so none were really left behind. I think I secretly hoped I could make a friend upon moving here but the few friends I do have are more quiet and reserved than me. So the idea of going to someone’s house is intimidating but kind of exciting. Especially a house like Bruce Wayne’s, one of the richest men in town. My house is no where near this size and it intimidates me even further as I approach it. I wasn’t sure what to do as I got close to the gate, nerves filling me. A doorbell sat to the right of the gate, my finger raising to press it. I gently press the button, a sound erupting from the device it was connected to. Nothing happens after this and I stand there, slightly embarrassed and confused. That was until I watched Dick ran from the top of the driveway, towards me. He had that big stupid grin he always has, which oddly calmed the nerves. “Hey! I thought I’d come get you.” He said, using the remote in his hand to open the gate. Admittedly, that was nice of him seeing as I wasn’t really sure how to get into this place. “It’s kinda huge, but I promise it’s much more inviting on the inside.” He goes on and on as we go up the long walk way. “Alfred’s pretty cool, don’t let him intimidate you.” Not a word has come from my mouth yet, but Dick seems to talk and talk and talk.

He definitely lied about the inside being more inviting, Mr.Wayne also seems to like keeping it dim in here. “Do you need anything, Master Dick?” Who I assume is Alfred says as Dick ushers me through the front of the house. “No thanks, Alfred! Janet is here to help me study.” Alfred looked in my direction, a small smile appearing on his face. “Welcome Mrs. Foster, it’s nice to have a neighbor over for a change.” This made my eyes widen, the idea of the Wayne estate residents acknowledging me and my families’ presence was surprising. I flash him a small smile before Dick nearly drags me up the stairs like an embarrassed child. The place really is huge and there are so many doors that I can only imagine lead to huge rooms. The house was covered in old things, vintage looking decor like it had been there for a long time. Eventually we made it to what I assume is hie bedroom, much more proper looking than I was expecting. “We have a library, but I thought you’d be more comfortable in here.” He was right, his room may also be huge, but much less intimidating than a large library. “Sorry about Alfred, he’s just excited about about having a guest.” I shake my head, a small chuckle leaving me. “No need to apologize.”

As the studying commenced, I began to realize Dick is actually really nice and that I may have judged him too quickly. He’s also not as dumb as I took him for, especially with numbers. “You’re really not that bad at math, y’know.” I said as I watched him finish his last problem on the homework. “Yeah?” He looked up with his bright blue eyes, a small grin on his lips. “Still not better than you.” I giggled, rolling my eyes. He keeps telling me how smart I am, but really if he applied himself I could see him getting pretty good grades. “So what’s it like, living in such a huge house like this? Is it just you, your father and Alfred?” I ask, watching him write the last number to his final answer. “Yeah it’s just us. This place is amazing, but kind of quiet and lonely sometimes.” He says with a shrug, pushing the paper to my direction on the floor. The more I see into his personal life, the more I understand why he would thrive off the attention at school, which I previously found obnoxious. With this new found understanding, his personality comes off as more endearing. “What about you? I mean what’s your home life like?” I look at him before darting my eyes down to his paper, he got it right. “Your answer is correct.” I said with a smile, going to pull the history book out of my bag. “You didn’t answer the question, that bad huh?” He motions to the book in my hands. “Before you start going on about that, I wanna know more about you, seriously.” I groan and roll my eyes, a small smile threatening to creep onto my cheeks. “It’s nothing special… really. I mean my parents are well off but we aren’t the closest, I focus on my studies mainly.” I shrug my shoulders, opening the book to the page we’ve been working on in class.

He rolls his eyes back at me, sitting back on his hands. “That’s all your gonna tell me, really? I’ll get more out of you by the time we’re done with this studying deal.” He says with a smirk, that classic smirk he uses on all the ladies. Unlike these other girls at school, I do not have the hots for Grayson. Now that I’ve gotten to know him though, I guess I understand the charm.

-

It’s been a week since we started tutoring, and he’s improved his grades a lot. All he really seemed to need, was a little bit more focus and motivation. I’ve decided I like this guy more than I thought I did, maybe he’s not the spoiled brat I assumed him to be. Dick has seemed to take a liking to me, saying hello in the halls and talking my ear off when I go over. He even invited me to the game tonight, to which I said no of course. School games have never been my thing, and Dick Grayson is not going to change that.

I am at the school, however to finish my last online paper of the week. Once a week I stay late and finish any computer work I need, seeing as I hate asking my dad to borrow his work computer over school papers. I always pick nights like this, a big game going on, staff and classmates a like making all tons of racket. It may seem like an odd time to get quiet study time, but this school is terrifying to be nearly alone in and the racket helps fill the overly silent room.

The paper took longer than I had hoped, but once I finished the last sentence it was all worth it. I wasn’t expecting the sky to be so dark as I exited, realizing I took my sweet time tonight. I usually try and leave right before the game ends, but tonight it’s just now ending. I make my way down the path in front of the school, passing all kinds of people I recognize. My eyes trail around to see Dick, standing with three girls that I see follow him around all the time. “Janet!” He seems to notice me as well, motioning in big movements for me to come over. I roll my eyes and make my way over, not exactly wanting to stay and chat. “Our basketball team did great, ya missed it!” He gets so excited about sports, just another thing we don’t have in common. “I think I’ll survive.” He grins at my sarcastic comment, like he always does. “You want a ride home?” He pulls his keys out of his pocket and shakes them, the girls next to him watching the charms dangle like cats. Dick will show that car daddy got him to anyone, he’s obsessed with it and I definitely don’t want that much attention. “Thanks, but no thanks. I’m walking home.” The girls next to him stop glaring and look away, happy with my answer. He gives me a disapproving look, hands flying to his hips. “It’s dark, Janet. Is that really safe?” I mock his stance, hands resting on my hips. “You can take me home, Dickie!” I nearly gag at that nickname, but this blondie always calls him that. He seems to get distracted by this easily, making my escape easy. He goes to speak again, but I swiftly had walked away and I’m sure those girls will take care of him just fine.

The walk home was going to be like any walk home, that was until I stumbled upon an old playground that i’ve loved since I moved here. The thing is falling apart and truly, it should probably be removed but on late night walks like this, I can’t help but gaze at it. The idea of sitting here and getting some much needed me time is great, so I go and take a seat at one of the swings that are barley hanging on. One thing I did not consider, is who ever else may also want to come to this park and if they could be unsafe. The air feels still, maybe even a bit too still. Gotham tends to be loud and polluted with the energies of overpopulation, but tonight it feels empty and calm. My phone begins to ring, the sound making me jump out of my skin. I go to check it, until a figure comes around the corner of a tree and makes me jump out of my skin once more.

Quickly standing up, the phone leaves my mind like it’s not even making sound anymore. The figure wastes no time making it’s way over and I waste no time attempting to get away. “What’s your name?” The mystery figure asks in an odd tone. “Do you wanna hang out?” The figure comes into light, it’s features now apparent to me. My heart gets caught in my throat, a decent sized man now in front of me. He looks disheveled, an evil grin adorning his face. I want to open my mouth and speak, but anxiety has my vocal chords tied. “I’m not gonna hurt you.” He gets closer, speaking again. I don’t trust his words, backing up further than I intended and almost falling over the swing behind me. “I gotta go.” That’s all I could get out as I prepare to book it. We make eye contact for a good amount of time, like he’s trying to intimate me. I take this second to split, but he proves to be faster than me and gets a good hold on my wrist. I scream, body instantly tensing and going into panic mode.

This guy has me, and based on his smirk I can only imagine what he plans to do with me. I struggle against his grip, pulling and tugging until his grip begins to cut off circulation. “Let go of me!” I scream, hearing a laugh erupt from his chest as he watches me struggle. I yank hard enough to send my body onto the concrete beneath me, this guy now preying from above me. I watch as he goes to grab me again, but within a blink he is now also on the ground. The wind gets knocked out of him as he hits the ground, “Grabbing young girls in the middle of the night? Is that really a good look?” A male voice asks, now standing in between me and my predator.

I look up to see my savior, a raven haired masked man. The guy gets up, panicked that he got caught and begins to run away. The masked man grabs something out of his pocket and throws it towards the running villain who instantly goes back down as it reaches him. My eyes go wide, darting from him to the masked man. I quickly get up, scrambling to find the courage to just run away back home but before I can the masked man turns to me. “Are you okay?” He asks, making my paranoia settle. I can’t see his eyes, but his expression is kind. I nod slowly, words still hiding from me. He checks back to see the guy is in fact down, the sharp object he threw sticking out of his ankle. Pained groans leave his mouth as he rolls around and holds his ankle, deserved.

“Did he hurt you?” My attention is brought back to my hero. “No… thanks to you.” I said softly, still shaken up. He smiled at my words, a smile I don’t think I’ll ever forget. He looked me up and down, his concerned expression returning. “You gotta be more careful, there’s some serious creeps out at night.” He looked around and then back at me. “I’ll take care of this guy, go home.” His voice was sweet but stern, just like the rest of him. I stare for a moment, looking between him and the guy on the ground. “Okay…” I finally find the words, “thanks again…” my voice soft, blushing at the grin he holds on his cheeks. I flash him the smallest grin before running from the scene, just glad to be okay.

I watched my back as I got home, making sure to avoid any more confrontation for tonight. Who was that guy? I couldn’t see beyond his mask. All I know, is that he will forever be my hero.

-

It’s now Monday and the idea of telling Dick he was right made my stomach turn. I should have let him drive me home, but a small part of me is glad I didn’t. After being saved by the infamous Robin, Batman’s side kick, I have a new idea of what a man should be like. No seriously, he’s all I could think about all weekend. The male love interests in my books have all become him and any cute boy at school now disinterests me. I’ve known of the vigilante and his side kick for a while now seeing as well… everyone here knows of Batman and Robin. I however never thought I’d find myself being saved by either of them, especially the cute sidekick. The sweet smile on his face, the confident way he holds himself, really everything about him seems so intoxicating. I’d be lying if I said school was on my mind at all today, like… at all. Of course I didn’t tell my parents, or anyone for that matter, I don’t want anyone knowing I put myself in such a risky situation. But Robin knows, and now I can’t help but wonder who on earth he could be.

“Earth to Janet!” Dick’s loud, obnoxious voice broke through my day dreams, making me realize I’m currently sitting on his bedroom floor. “C’mon, Jan! We got a test tomorrow and you’ve barley been here for the last hour. What are you thinking about?” I look up from the floor and to him. He’s leaning back against the bed frame, a puzzled look on his face. “I mean, usually you’re yelling at me to pay attention.” He chews on the gum in his mouth, a large smack sounding every few minutes. “Sorry Dick, I just have a lot on my mind.” The idea of telling him about my mystery savior scares me, but maybe he can help me figure out who it is. “Oh yeah? I didn’t know anything could be more important to you than studying.” I give him a playful glare, deciding to glaze over his comment. “Something crazy happened to me Friday night.”

This caused him to perk up, instantly sitting up. “Crazy? Like what?” He blinked a few times, watching me react hesitantly. “I can see the wheels turning Jan, what happened?” He practically jumped up and down in his seat, obviously intrigued. I sigh, leaning in like I’m about to reveal a huge secret. “I got attacked by some psycho at the park…” His eyed went wide, mouth opening to say I told you so I assume but I cut him off. “He tried to hurt me… I mean I really thought I was a goner. But Robin showed up!” I could feel my own eyes light up, lips threatening to yank a grin onto my cheeks. “He saved me!” He raised a brow, the same puzzled look still adorning his face. “Robin? Like Batman’s sidekick Robin?” I nod furiously, adjusting in my seat on the floor. “Yes! He flew right in and saved me. I mean really Dick, you should have seen the guys face, he was flabbergasted!” This made us both chuckle, before he got real serious again.

“I’m glad he was there to save you, but what did I tell you about walking home at night… alone?! Seriously Jan, you could have been seriously hurt.” I roll my eyes, groaning at he sound of him shrilling. “I know, I know-“

“And who even is this Robin guy? I mean isn’t he a vigilante?” I quickly shake my head at the idea of Robin being any less than a masked hero. “No, no! He’s a hero… he’s my hero. I mean, he saved me!” A small grin appeared on his face, for why I’m not sure but he seemed to like that answer. “Just be careful…” He says soft, both of our eyes darting down to the book in front of us. He’s right, I haven’t been very focused on our study course today. A small smile sits on my cheeks as I think of Robin and how he saved me, reliving it as I told the story to Dick. “Soooo… you got a thing for this guy or something? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile this much.” My eyes dart up from the page, a crimson blush taking over my entire face. “A what-“

He smirked, closing the book and accepting his fate of no studying today. “A crush, you have a crush.” A shocked sound leaves my mouth, if this booknwasnt so heavy, I’d throw it at him. “He saved my life!” He laughs, causing a giggle to also erupt from me. “Hey, I get it, don’t gotta make excuses with me.” I laugh harder, embarrassed but he just smiles down at me.

“If you figure out who he is, can I come to the wedding?”

-

A month later

After school activities had gone back to normal after me and Dick’s study agreement was over. He finally passed the classes he was in trouble for and got to return to the team. We may not hang out every day anymore, but I was surprised to see him still talk to me. Some days, he even has me come over to help with homework. Dick is very smart, it’s not that he can’t do it, he just really needs help focusing sometimes.

As for my crush on Robin, nothing has come of that. I did as much research as possible, or at least to my knowledge and this guy has done a really good job of concealing his identity. I’ve seen him a few more times, in the middle of some crime fighting with Batman in the city but haven’t tried to approach him. Really, all hopes of ever finding him have left me and I’m happy with that. I’ve spent my whole life so far alone, and it will continue that way, it’s not like anyone would ever like me like that anyways.

Today I agreed to go home with Dick, who wanted some help with a project and while I really wanted to meet him there, he’s insisted he drive us there. I feel terribly awkward and uncomfortable as I walk down the hall and towards the back door, next to Dick Grayson. “You’re gonna love my car, she purrs like a kitty.” He makes a cat sound, causing me to cringe even further. “You’re so weird, Dick.” He laughs as we pass girls and guys, all with weird looks on their faces. I’m not used to this kind of attention, in fact I do not like it. This is the kind of attention I had expected though if I let him drive me home, no body would expect him to have me in his car. He held the back door open for me and dragged me out to his car, grinning and waving to some of his fan girls on the way.

“Your first ride in the Grayson mobile!” He actually opens the passenger door for me, which makes a small grin appear on my cheeks. “And only.” I mutter to myself, but he seems to miss it and quickly jump into the drivers seat, taking no time to take off. I try and ignore the feeling of eyes staring at me as we speed out of the parking lot, admittedly this car does go pretty fast, but I’m still not convinced it could charm me like the other girls it works on. The drive to his house was fast and I enjoyed the silence for once as he focused on driving. Alfred seemed happy to see me, as he usually is and Bruce is no where to be found… as he usually is. I have actually met him a few times now and swear he even recognizes me now.

I’ve gotten a full tour of the Wayne mansion by now, so I grew surprised when I realized I got lost. On my way back from the bathroom I must have taken a wrong turn somehow and now found myself in an area of the house I don’t recognize as much. I will admit, this house leaves me curious with it’s age and size so I begin to peek into different rooms I’ve never seen before. One of them seems like an office, an older office that Bruce may not use anymore so I quietly slip in, planning to just look for a second. A large bookcase sat behind a desk, which is the first thing to grab my attention. I stand back and look at a few books, until a few specific titles take my attention away from the rest. Leave it to me to instead of snooping, get distracted by books. After listening for anyone coming, I go to grab a book from the shelf but it seems stuck. I tug a few times, the shelf shifting before me after the last tug. I hop back as the small opening appears from behind the now pushed aside case.

A dark room is now before me, small and quiet. I decide after an internal battle in my head to step inside and look around. It’s dusty in some spots, and I’m not able to see all too well because of the dark, but I do see the reflection of a glass case. I get close, finding old torn up fabric behind the said glass of the case. This isn’t any normal fabric though, these are a pair of Batman and Robin suits, a few of the things I’ve seen them wear. My eyes widen, breathe getting caught in my throat, why does Bruce Wayne have these? I scan them from top to bottom, they look used and torn in some places, like they really have been used in battle. I’m not stupid, and there’s no way Bruce Wayne is just a huge Batman fan, I know what this must mean. “You’re not gonna like- tell anyone right?” This makes me nearly jump out of my skin and fly through the ceiling. “Oh shit!” I yelled in surprise and fear, whipping around to see it’s just Dick who must have snuck in here quieter than a mouse. “Bruce is batman?” I quickly ask, words pouring out of my mouth. He gets closer quickly, movements also rapid and nervous. “You can’t tell anyone!” He whisper yells, now close enough for only me to hear him. He looks down at me, an expression of fear painting his eyes. “I mean seriously, Janet-“

I look him up and down before turning to look at the Robin suit that sat next to Batman’s. “This means that…” I trail off, nerves starting to consume me. “You’re… No way.” He seems to get even more nervous than before, showing a side of him I’ve never seen before. He sighs as I stand and look at him, dumbfounded. “Yes Janet… I’m Robin. And Bruce is Batman, but absolutely nobody can know-!”

“I won’t tell anyone I swear, okay?” I quickly reassure him, wanting his trust. “I mean it.” We both stare at each other for a moment, my cheeks heating as I think about the fact that… well Dick is Robin. The same Robin I’ve been crushing on… the same crush I told Dick about. Oh my god, I can’t tell if this is exciting, confusing or embarrassing. I’ve never seen Dick like that, but Robin is the most infatuating person I’ve ever seen. This also means that Dick was watching, an saved me, one of the sweetest things anyone has ever done for me. Dick is my hero. His face slowly changes from shaken to smug, a smirk tugging his lips’ upward. “Does this mean you got it bad for me?” He says, biting his own lip and holding his hands together. My cheeks go hot and red, spit getting caught in my throat as I watch him stand and look at me, almost excited like.

“You don’t have to be shy about it.” He says soft, inching closer. I stutter, not sure how to respond. I’ve always found Dick Grayson to be overrated and annoying, but over time I have learned to love him as a friend. “I don’t know what to say…” I say soft, my eyes trailing down to the ground. I’ve learned Dick is a decent guy, but now I know he’s even better than I thought, a real hero. I look back up, seeing that his smile remains, but softens from smug to sweet. “You could ask me out.” He says soft, his thumbs still pulling at each other. It almost seems like, he wants me or something like he’s been waiting for this moment and wants me to ask him out. “Do you want that?” I asked, head cocked to the side. His smile fades, this seemed to embraced him, oops. “Yeah.” He says bluntly, making me confidence leave me and nerves return. “I’ve liked you for a while now… since you started tutoring me.” He looks at me with soft eyes, a small smile returning. “If you don’t feel the same it’s okay-“

“No! I do like you.” The words just seemed too again, pour out of me like an uncontrollable waterfall. “I like both of you… you and Robin I mean. You just happen to be both of them. You’re the one that saved me.” He watched me from a few inches away before deciding to break the distance and pull me into a gentle but close hug. “You’re the only person that seems to like me for me, of course I’d save you.” He said softly, pulling away to look at me for a moment. We lock eyes as he leans down to kiss me softly, but only for a moment to leave it soft and gentle. “What about all the others girls at school that like you?” I ask softy, eyes trailing to the side, his kiss tingling my lips. I always tease him about all the girls that he flirts with, little did I know the whole time I was who he wanted. “I only want you, though.” This made me smile and lean up to give him a peck on the cheek. He chuckled to himself, pulling me closer and squeezing me to death which also admitted a chuckle from me.

“No seriously though, you can’t tell anyone about the Batman and Robin shit.” I look up at him with a smirk, a way to tease him. “On one condition.” He rolls his eyes, hand reaching up top hold my cheek in his palm. “You and your conditions.”

“I get to be your girlfriend.”

“As long as I get to be your boyfriend.”

love, spell <3

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𝐢'𝐯𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞

pairing: best friend! eijiro kirishima x innocent chubby reader

word count: 1.3k words

"you know kiri i've never been kissed before," you tell him quietly when you're watching a kissing scene come on the tv.

kirishima thought he knew everything about you, he knew you were innocent and pure but he was sure you must have been kissed once, you were both well in your 20s at this point. "how?" kirishima asks matching your volume.

"well is it really that surprising? i've never been in a relationship or anything and i've never been to many parties to randomly kiss people. i'm not really a party person and whenever i do go to parties i stay with you the whole time and i don't drink at all." you lean your head against him and link your arm around his.

"i guess it's not that surprising..." he trails off at the end.

"yeah, plus i don't really know a lot of people and i'm pretty sure you scare people off. you're so big it probably freaks them out, thinking that you'll fight them or something," you say while giggling.

kirishima grins, he would never admit it but he has intentionally scared some people off. in his eyes they don't deserve you so he purposely increases your already physical friendship and touches you more so they know you're off limits or he purposely stands really close to them which makes them back away when they realise how huge he is and how if they got on his wrong side he could absolutely destroy them. because, in the end, you're too good for them, too pure and kind and wonderful and they don't deserve you.

"it's okay that you've never kissed anyone. you shouldn't kiss someone random, like if you're at a party and drunk or something. you should kiss someone you should trust," kirishima reassures you.

"like you?" if kirishima was in the middle of having a drink he would of spat it out. his back straightens, and his cheeks go red. his adorable best friend just cocking her head to the side and asking him such a loaded question so cutely.

"what- what do you mean?" he slightly stumbles over his words but you don't notice.

"well... who was your first kiss."

kirishima slightly deflates, he then realises of course you'd never ask a question like that to him. you don't think of him like that. you just want to know if his first kiss was special and with someone he trusted. "not quite, it was a dare when i was 11? or 12, maybe? i kissed mina, mina ashido. she was in our class when we were kids, you remember her right?"

you disliked that and you went sour, out of all people why did it have to be her, of course kirishima would like her, who wouldn't, she's everything you're not though and it reminds you how you'll forever be just his friend. she's an extrovert and extremely brave and thin and conventionally attractive, you're not.

kirishima notices the way your body shrinks in on yourself and how your expression has changed. "are you alright sweetheart?" you nod your head and hum, maybe to everyone else it would be convincing but not to him.

you don't know how you do it but you gather another confidence for just a second to ask him a question that you wanted to ask him originally a couple minutes ago. "i trust you." you look down, unable to look at him in eye or even his face.

"yeah, i trust you too," he replies cautiously unsure about what you're going on about.

"well...you said my first kiss should be with someone who i trust," you say while twiddling your fingers.

kirishima's mouth becomes suddenly dry as he now realises what you're talking about. "that would be very unmanly of me. i don't think you really want that sweetheart," he says reluctantly, he wants you to mean it but he thinks you don't.

as soon as you hear him you look up frantically because if he's being honest when he said that it means he didn't deny you or your request but denied that you actually wanted him. you grab hold of his arm and look him in the eye. "no, no that's not true! i want you!" kirishima's eyes widen at your raised voice and how you're shaking his arm, he can't help but grin at your reaction.

"alright sweetheart," he can never say no to you, he never wants to and now he'll actually be able to kiss you. to do the thing he's been dreaming about for years.

"holy shit, really?"

kirishima bursts out laughing. "yeah." you give him a soft smile and momentarily bury your head in his chest before looking up at him and giving him an even bigger smile.

"so um, what do we do?" you question shyly while kirishima grins at your cute naivety.

kirishima tucks some of the strands of your hair behind your ear, "you can close your eyes if you want. just close your eyes and relax, i'll do the rest." you mumble out an okay and flutter your eyes close.

kirishima gently holds your cheek in his hand and presses your foreheads together. you can feel his callus hands on your skin and it's making your face heat up at the contact. his other hand rests on the nape of your neck, keeping you both close to one another. he presses your lips together in a sweet kiss that makes you melt into him and it makes you both dizzy in the process. he can smell your pretty perfume and his shampoo is overwhelming your senses. he smiles against your lips and pulls you even closer.

your arms are stiff and slightly raised in the air and your fists are clenched, not knowing where to put your hands. as the kiss carries on you press your lips harder against his, wanting more. kirishima takes the hint and gently bites your bottom lip causing you to gasp. you're unsure of what to do but kirishima takes charge and you make out until you both have to break away for air before going in to kiss again.

he groans as you slip your tongue against his. "fuck," he groans roughly as he lifts you on his lap. you make a small shriek at the movement and he chuckles. all he can think about you, your lips, your face, your body, you. he runs his hands along your body, holding your love handles and grabbing chunks of your plush thighs. he can't help but place wet kisses against your neck causing you to gasp again and hold onto his arm, making crescent moon shape indents with your nails.

at the noise kirishima holds onto your chubby cheek again and stops kissing you, you open your eyes and look up at him. "how was your first kiss sweetheart?"

"i'm pretty sure that was more than just a first kiss kiri." you giggle back at him.

"well excuse me for kissing the woman i love," he says cheekily with a huge grin on his face.

"who you what?" you both freeze. you press your lips together in a tight line to try to stop yourself from smiling and he turns the same shade as his hair.

he bites his own lip trying to figure out what to do. he doesn't know what he can do to get out of this but he knows that no matter what happens you'll always remain friends, you'd never stop being his friends because he loves you.

"i do... i do sweetheart. i love you. i know you don't feel the same and that's okay." your eyes start watering and tears start running down your face, he quickly wipes the tears away and rushes out, "i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i didn't mean to make you sad."

you grab hold of the collar of his shirt afraid that he'll change his mind and leave. "i'm not sad. i'm happy, so terribly happy." you pause as you take in a breath, trying to stop crying. "i love you so much."

[maxdibert]

Now this got me interested; why do you think that aside from BCJr and Evan, they also make HCs of other villains like Umbridge, but avoid this specific character? She was a strict teacher, a bitch and not conventionally attractive as well, but it doesn’t stop them from school years HCs.

Because deep down, that whole "I don't like Snape because he bullied kids as an adult" thing is just a fucking cheap excuse. Barty Crouch Jr. tortured and killed people as an adult, bullied kids, and physically abused them. Bellatrix Lestrange, Dolores Umbridge—all these people did the same. They don’t give a single fuck.

The truth is, neither Barty, Bella, nor Dolores get in the way of the idea that the Marauders were super cool, fun-loving main characters adored by everyone, which they love so much. Bella, Barty, or Dolores can be fan favorites without forcing people to rethink the morality of the Marauders because they have nothing to do with them. But Severus does. If you include Severus in the equation, you have to bring up the bullying, the abuse, the sexual harassment, the attempted murder… And then they have to consider that those boys weren’t the social justice warriors, super woke, and awesome guys they love to portray them as, but rather a bunch of privileged, abusive, and deeply problematic brats. So they choose to exclude Snape, period. Or they come up with shitty excuses or make up things that never happened in the canon to justify their bashing and ostracism.

Honestly, if you see any Marauders blog that includes Umbridge or even randoms like Dorcas Noonecaresaboutyourlastname or Pandora Whoevenisthatchick but doesn’t include Snape, or if he only appears in their posts to get shit on, then run for your life. Those blogs are the fandom equivalent of those straight guys who have never had a female friend or only have female friends to sleep with them. Or those girls who have NEVER had a group of female friends or have fallen out with every group of female friends they've ever had. You know those kinds of people? Exactly: Walking red flags the size of China and Russia combined.

[the-fern-club]

Random Marauders fandom vent post, don't like, just scroll please

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Why am I so upset right now? Oh, I don't know, maybe because every single Marauder/Marauders Era character is boxed into "good" or "evil" despite every single one being only a fucking child and having been forced into a war that wasn't their fault and raised to be child soldiers despite the fact that everything about the situation was out of their control except for which side they chose and they knew if they chose the wrong side, they'd get killed by the other side. They were children who wanted to live, and they were forced to fight for their lives. Why is Peter "an evil villain" because he chose his safest route but James is "a hero" for the same reason? And why is Barty seen as cool and likeable despite going down the exact same part Peter did? They both killed people and worked for someone who was essentially a terrorist, why are some of the Death Eaters better than Peter? Ideally I know it's because Barty is seen as conventionally attractive and Peter is not, but I don't think that's fair. They were children. They didn't deserve anything they went through. And even less so they deserve to be boxed into different opinions by a fandom based on whether or not they're hot.

Be better please. None of them were fully good or bad. All of them were kids trying to survive something they couldn't control.

[thesexymanscholar]

What defines a tumblr sexy man? I’ve seen a lot of controversy over the recent poll

The original definition was defined as a popular character who was not conventionally attractive, or was in some way a “strange, unusual or even controversial hear me out”

Sexymen usually have consistent traits and tropes, the most common being well-dressed cartoon villains.

Unfortunately, people just started calling whoever a sexyman. I remember the wiki becoming overrun with obvious joke articles, random generically hot anime women (like Yor Forger from Spy X Family) or a person’s random obscure hyperfixation character. And the recent sexyman contest def shows that people are still heavily debating the terms of a sexyman. Hence why I’m strict on my own definitions.

EDIT: I forgot to add that the sexyman contest 2025 used user submitted contestants, so that’s why there is such a disparity in the contestants.

[amf-studios]

Hello. Please answer this. I think it's important these get adressed. me and others of this community have been getting uncomfortable with some of your art. While I see nothing wrong with the Fankai, the rest of it has caused issues for people. First, there is the Natsuki fanfic. While I personally don't have much issue with it, there are some who feel very uncomfortable with their comfort character (Nate) Being changed in such a drastic way, and believe a separate community should be made for that art, as some people have gotten to the point of self harm from seeing their comfort characters changed so much. Next, there is uncomfortable undertones to your "Damonate" Fanfic. It seems very "Loli" esque, with a childish hundred year old woman being with a child. Then there is the sexual undertones to some of the natsuki art, particularly the maid outfit with Arachnia. This is to some extent sexualization of a minor. Then, there is the inequality in the amount of transmasc and transfem characters you draw. 90% of your characters that are trans are transfem, and barely any are transmasc. Then, finally, there is the softcore Arachnus and Toadal Dude art. While nothing is showing, it is very clearly provocative and you have a mostly minor fanbase. I believe that art should be on a separate account.

If you could adress these, it would be good. Thank you.

OK, guess we're doing this.

I've heard a decent few people say they find my natsuki au uncomfortable. I will only say this: no one is making you interact with this content. If you don't like it, just scroll.

I haven't heard anything about the self harm until now, but in my honest opinion; "self harm over someone else doing fanon stuff with a fictional character is indicative of a much larger issue." I say this not to undermine the struggle with self harm, as I have dealt with it myself in the past, but I cannot stress this enough, a random person on the internet's visual fanfiction should not be cited as the reason for that.

Onto the damonate issue. The yokai watch Fandom needs to realize it is a Canon fact "YOKAI DO NOT AGE THE SAME AS HUMANS"

Toiletta is 70 and still a little girl, enma is 60 and acts like a teenager til about shadowside. It is clear that the immortality of being a yokai affects how one matures, so their chronological age does not automatically make them an adult.

And with Damona, she is arguably *very much a child.*

The only time in the games where she is actually treated as a character, she is primarily characterized as a daddies girl who feigned being emotionless in order to get her dad to spend time with her. 2

(I have not seen any full episode of her in the anime, but what I have seen doesn't really disprove the above point.)

On top of that, damona received a redesign in shadowside, the sequel series where Nate himself is an adult.

And it is incredibly clear, she has also matured in this time skip. I don't know why she ages so much in 3 decades when she's at least 190 by the first game, but here we are.

Yokai age is inconsistent, but Damona is one of the more clear-cut examples of being a child.

Onto the maid point: yeah, kinda. I didn't really realize the unfortunate implications until *after* I posted the art. But I do feel that of any maid outfits I could have chose, I used some of the tamer ones as not a lot of skin is really shown on the drawing, or the characters I pulled them from. (The joke with Entoma is specifically that she *isnt* conventionally attractive)

Unfortunately maids in general have been sexualized to hell and back along with a number of other female specific outfits.

On the transmasc point: I actually agree. Mostly cause I use my own experience as a base for making content, and I just don't really have a lot of transmasc headcanons I jive with.

I have tried to rectify this with the oc Toransu being specifically a transmasc character, but I could definitely be doing more.

And on the final point: I will just make it clear here

I AM NOT HERE TO BABYSIT YOUR KIDS.

Social media generally has rules against those younger than teen years making accounts for a reason.

I know kids will lie about their ages to circumvent this, hell *I* did that when I was younger. But it still remains: it is a parents responsibility to track what their children are doing on the internet. Not the random fanartist who makes funky ghost content. If kids are coming across content I have explicitly flagged for my older audiences, that is the parent's responsibility.

I see no point in making a separate account for something I've basically only done once and don't really plan to do often. Even if I did, I've been told my style is very easy to recognize. Meaning by all accounts, I'd likely still hear someone bitching about me doing it.

And while it wasn't a point in this comment, I might as well address it: it's been brought to my attention that people are evidently accusing me of being "a proshipper"

I have never been able to actually understand that whole "pro vs anti" debate, and every attempt to get an answer has just left me confused.

All I will say on that is incest and pedo shit is gross. Apart from that, ship whatever you want, and for fucks sake don't get on people's case for ships you don't like for no reason. There are better uses of your time.

Sorry for the full rant.

[fiddlehead-soup]

I have to see "Illithids don't have souls, Withers confirms it" utilized as some kind of gotcha 50 times a day and every single time I have to fight down the urge to waste time explaining that he admits he was wrong about this and/or affirms that the illithid you bring to the final battle still pings as who they were originally to him because I'd have to do it a dozen times a day forever. Why do people want soulless illithids so badly? They get outright mad if you correct them. I'm so tired.

I've had friends and even randoms ask me why I like Emperor so much. Even when I go on a rant and list every single thing I love about them, and how cool of a character they are, and cite a ton of screenshots or texts, somehow people still joke that I was gaslit by Emperor, or their opinion simply does not sway at all. The best I ever did was to have my best friend say "I get why you like them, but I never could."

Unfortunately the game purposely leaves things unclear and folks see whatever they want to see in the thickness of the fog.

Nothing can be done about that, unless the Emperor somehow gets additional content down the road and even then, it's a gamble whether or not those writers are going to interpret Emps with depth.

My personal theory is that it might depend on someone's past experience/knowledge with illithids in DnD in general, and their first run of BG3. Since the game is such an immersive RP, I think people just get really caught up in feeling 'betrayed' by Emperor in most cases, and hold on to that negativity.

Why people's opinions seem to never change even when it's proven they are factually incorrect, I honestly can't answer that, because I don't get it, either. I've had plenty of characters in media I started out hating and then ended up loving. The stubbornness to despise Emperor is a new thing entirely I've never seen for any other character in pop media.

As for why Emperor is not popular in fandom specifically (Tumblr, Twitter, AO3, etc.) despite other characters who do much worse to Tav than them having huge fanbases, three words:

Not Conventionally Attractive