#but why is actually having that happen so nerve-wracking
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loveafterdeath-if · 2 days ago
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Can I ask you how El would have reacted if MC asked them what they wanted to ask (maybe at home while reassuring El on the couch or while brushing teeth)?
I hope we're thinking about the same thing, well, obviously there's only one thing MC wanted to ask so hopefully I got it right.
Btw, I, uh, got a bit carried away haha....
Here’s how it would’ve been in another life
(Serious is green and playful is red)
As you brush El's teeth, your brain thinks and overthinks, gears turning in your head relentlessly. Should you ask now? But then again, proposing right now is a bit... 
Let's just say you imagined something more elegant and sophisticated. You're brushing his/her teeth, both of your mouths coated with toothpaste foam. There's nothing elegant about it but... You still have this little box in your pocket and you don't think you can wait any longer. 
That waitress did ruin your moment earlier, but it doesn't have to be perfect, right? It's the thought that counts as they say, and you love El. Your love has to be enough. 
"What ah you hinkin–" El pushes the toothbrush away making you pull your hand back as he/she spits in the sink next to him/her. After a moment, he/she tries again. "What are you thinking about?" 
"I–" 
"Me?" El wiggles his/her brows. "You're thinking about me, admit it." 
"Maybe you'd know if you actually let me answer," you huff a laugh, nudging his/ her inner thigh playfully from between his/her legs "Can I talk or do I have to pay for subscription to do it?" you level him/her with a deadpan stare.
El only grins as he/she waves a hand for you to continue. "Alright, alright. Go ahead, babe." 
Suddenly, you're not sure anymore if you wanna talk. His/Her full attention is on you now, his/her eyes shining with wonder and curiosity. 
You clear your throat, straighten your back and swallow hard as your hand hovers over your pocket where the lil treasure lies. The object feels uncomfortably heavy in your pocket right now. This is nerve-wracking. This is probably a bad idea to do it right now.
Fuck, you're nervous... your hand is slightly trembles and you hope he/she doesn't notice. 
He/She does. 
"Hey," he/she murmurs softly, wiping toothpaste from the corner of your lips with his/ her thumb before cleaning his/her own mouth under the sink’s spray. 
You're glad he/she did. At least you'll look somewhat decent for what's about to happen.
"You okay?" he/she asks, hands reaching out again but this time to cup your cheeks, thumbs stroking gently there. He/She seems torn between reassuring you about whatever has you feeling this way and teasing you. "What's going on?" 
"Nothing," you mutter, a slight frown betraying your words. 
It's El's turn to frown as he/she searches your eyes. Finding them he/she smiles warmly. "Why are you frowning, then? 
"I'm..." not. That's what you want to say but it'd be a lie. 
“You are,” he/she retorts in a quiet voice, gaze darting between your eyes. “Did I do something?”
“No,” you shake your head, your hand covering one of his/hers on your cheek. “No, you didn’t.” “Then tell me what’s wrong?” "Mh? Nothing, nothing," you grin at him/her, trying to mask your nervousness. 
El cocks a brow, a teasing smile spreading on his/her lips. "Why do I feel like you're lying?" 
"Me?" you throw him/her your most innocent look.
Your lover mirrors you, batting his/her eyelashes playfully. “Yes, you.”
“I would never,” you declare dramatically, a hand raised as if performing a theatrical monologue. “My heart is too pure, my soul too genuine, my mind too–“
But seeing his/her growing worry, you finally sigh. Right, maybe not a good idea to deflect right now.
You’re someone courageous, you’re gonna propose right now. You’ll do it. Right here, right now. Or maybe after some minutes of– no, you’ll do it.
Slipping your hand in your pocket, you suck in a breath. Shit, okay, you're actually doing it. This is now or never. No time for overthinking it. 
"El," you start. You want to go again and start saying how much you love him/her, how much he/she means to you. But if you do that, you're scared to backtrack and decide against it once again. 
El nods, patiently waiting, anticipating. He/She takes back his/her toothbrush to brush his/her teeth while you take your sweet time spilling it.  Slowly, your lower your knee until it touch the floor and that’s exactly when his/her whole body freeze, the box finally showing its head as you lift it and open it for El's view. The chocolate diamond not shining as brightly as El’s eyes.
"Marry me," you finally say. 
It's a bit... blunt, but there's no denying the vulnerability in your eyes right now as you hold his/her gaze. Your throat constricts and your heart races, as if trying to escape your damn ribcage.  "Marry me?" you attempt a smile, trying to bring out your playful side. But you can't hide how terrified you are right now. 
It’s one thing to joke here and there, but it's another to expose yourself so much, so… completely. 
You did it. The stress hasn’t vanished at all, though. You proposed... now you just have to actually hear the answ– 
Your eyes instinctively close when El sputters, literally spitting in your face as you grimace. Wow... so much for a picture-perfect proposal moment...
However, when your eyes open, your expression softens at the sight he's/she's giving you. 
His/Her eyes watering and glimmering with unshed tears, lips trembling, soft, choked noises escaping his/her throat. "You're a monster..." 
You blink at him/her. You're not sure how to interpret this answer. 
Suddenly, El sobs, launching off the counter to practically tackle you. You both crash to the floor with a solid thud. You groan, rubbing the back of your head, suddenly thankful for your thick skull. Your attention is pulled elsewhere, though. You feel him/her nod frantically against your skin, burying his/her head in the crook of your neck. "Yes yes YES... I love you." 
His/Her hiccups and whimpers echo in the bathroom as he/she grips you for dear life, as if afraid it's all a dream. "I love you so much..." 
You don't waste time wrapping your arms around him/her, pulling him/her closer than he/she already is. Your hand rubs his/her back as he/she lets it all out, your own eyes watering at the pure joy you're feeling right now.
“It’s… It’s my fave color,” he/she hiccups against you, body shivering with each sob.
“I know.”
“I love you I love you I love you…”
"I love you too, El." 
The box is forgotten on the floor. 
But it's okay, because the man/woman in your arms is more important than any rings in the world. 
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ilovedthestars · 1 month ago
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oh god having a complainy tumblr post blow up is so stressful
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hannieehaee · 5 months ago
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MAIN THING
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18+ / mdi
summary: after years of insistence from soonyoung, he finally convinces resident social butterfly seungkwan to introduce him to his unrequited crush; a fellow idol at hybe who he has not been able to take his eyes off since moving to the company.
content: idol!hoshi x idol!reader, simp!hoshi, he's down horribly bad, seungkwan is fed up with hoshi, afab reader, smut, oral (m receiving), penetrative sex, etc.
wc: 11k
a/n: finally wrote a long hoshi fic everyone cheer
masterlist | kofi/patreon
support me through a one time tip<3
"Just introduce me to her. Please," whined Soonyoung for the nth time that week.
"I already said no! Just go talk to her yourself like a normal person," rebutted Seungkwan, attempting but failing at disregarding his insistent friend.
"He can't do that. Last time they made eye contact he ran to hide behind Mingyu," snickered Jeonghan, invested in this conversation whenever it was brought up.
"I just need you to get the ball rolling. Please, Kwan-ah," he pleaded as he got up in Seungkwan's personal space – a thing everyone knew not to do.
Rolling his eyes, he sighed, "She already knows who you are, you know. There's no need to introduce you," he muttered under his breath.
"Wait, what. She does? Like knows knows me? Or just knows of Hoshi of Seventeen?", his eyes widened in shock, grabbing onto Seungkwan's shoulders to get his full attention.
"She knows Kwon Soonyoung, dumbass. She's one of my closest friends, why wouldn't she know of you?", he grumbled, attempting to shake off his friend.
Soonyoung sighed at the short-lived hope he had of you having maybe taken an interest to him and brought him up in conversation with Seungkwan, just to have confirmation (yet again) of you simply knowing him as Seungkwan's groupmate.
It had been two, no, three years since Soonyoung had first developed a special interest in you. Thinking back to when Pledis was first acquired by Hybe, Soonyoung still remembered the first time he saw you in person very vividly.
Instantly, he developed a crush on you from the very first glance, only falling further any time you'd cross paths in the building.
He had known of your existence before that, of course, but had never truly acknowledged his obvious crush on you until he first met you in person.
Unfortunately for Soonyoung, he was far too shy and introverted to ever actually engage in conversation with you, much less slide his way into your life the way Seungkwan so easily had – Seungkwan, who had become one of your closest friends. On the contrary, Soonyoung would actively go out of his way to avoid you, never even so much as making eye contact whenever Seungkwan would bring you around.
It was easy for him to become the mockery of the members due to this. Leave it to him to have his years-long crush become best friends with one of his best friends, leading him to your constant, nerve-wracking proximity.
At some point he decided that maybe he should break out of his shell – the shell he had created specifically to shield himself from his feelings for you. He decided that instead of avoiding you, he'd do the next best thing ... which was to ask Seungkwan to officially re-introduce you to each other.
You were blissfully unaware of Soonyoung's crush, he knew that much. Did you know of his existence? Barely, as you'd only interacted a handful of times, with those always being brief and impersonal interactions. This gave Soonyoung the perfect opportunity to start brand new with you. Except he'd need the help of his most extroverted friend, who just so happened to be your best friend.
After begging Seungkwan to please work his social butterfly magic on him, he found himself unsuccessful. Seungkwan would merely scoff and tell him to grow up, leading Soonyoung to be mocked by one of the other eleven members, and then the cycle would repeat. Currently, it was Jeonghan's turn to snicker at Soonyoung's misery, it seemed.
Taking note of Soonyoung's pouty lips and saddened demeanor, Jeonghan took pity on him and clapped his hands decisively before speaking up again.
"Okay, how about you let Hoshining here take your place in doing the TikTok challenge for maestro with Y/N? If they hit it off, then you've done your due diligence, and if not, Soonie can just go get fucked. Everybody wins," he suggested as he shrugged at Seungkwan.
Soonyoung lit up at this, choosing to completely disregard the last two sentences of his suggestion. This was more than enough for him to get the ball rolling.
Immediately joining in on the plan, he turned to Seungkwan once more, ready to beg again.
"Don't say anything," Seungkwan shushed him with a lift of his finger, opposite hand now digging into his temple in what Soonyoung hoped to simply be exaggerated annoyance, "I'll do it, just, please grant me twenty minutes of silence," he pleaded.
That worked well enough for Soonyoung.
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"Okay, fuck, I don't think I can do this."
"Are you fucking kidding me?", Seungkwan practically growled.
"What he means is that he's a little nervous. Right, Soonie?," Jeonghan tried to alleviate, standing behind Hoshi and rubbing his shoulders in an attempt to soothe him.
"You've been begging for this for weeks. I already told Y/N you'd be meeting her at her group's floor. You're doing this," huffed Seungkwan, not truly angry but just easily riled up by his friend's needless anxieties.
"I know! I'll do it, just- I need to hype myself up for it," he took a deep breath.
"C'mon, Soonie. You look great, all you have to do is go up to her and impress her with your dancing. Your natural chemistry will do the rest," reassured Joshua, who had been let in on the situation by Jeonghan just a few days prior.
Although most of the members were well aware of Soonyoung's embarrassing crush on you, not all of them truly took an interest. Jeonghan and Joshua seemed to want to keep informed simply for entertainment purposes. Soonyoung didn't care as long as they helped ease his nerves somehow. He needed all the support he could get as he attempted to calm himself down enough to go face the love of his life (How he got to that conclusion, he was unsure, but the label felt right at the moment).
After about twenty more minutes of annoyed groans from Seungkwan and occasional breakdowns from Soonyoung, the four boys finally made their way to your floor, with Soonyoung's members joining in just for emotional support, or maybe to mock his nerves from afar.
Spotting you as you leaned against the wall next to your practice room, Soonyoung gulped, blinking rapidly to make sure the sight was correct. You weren't even wearing anything out of the ordinary, yet Soonyoung was enamored by how pretty you looked in your usual rehearsal attire. He could picture you lounging around his house in a similarly comfortable outfit, maybe waking up early to make breakfast as he came up to you and pressed up against you, breathing in your shampoo and-
"Soonyoung! Go!," whisper-yelled Seungkwan after a few moments of Soonyoung freezing in the hallway, letting his imagination take over for too long.
"C'mon, go say hi, Soonie," said Hannie, seemingly sincere in his encouragement.
You hadn't spotted him yet, seeing as they had barely entered the long hallway and you were standing on the opposite end. However, just a few steps and the sound of his footsteps would likely catch your attention. The thought made him sweat. Despite having briefly interacted with you before, he just couldn't imagine a one-on-one with you. He knew for a fact that he'd crash and burn the moment you shared a smile with him.
It was too late now, though. He was already moving towards you, creating a distance between him and his members while decreasing the distance between you and him. That was when you heard him coming, turning to face him and immediately offering him a smile, waving him over to you.
It was obvious to Soonyoung how you and Seungkwan had become friends so easily. You were both so friendly and outgoing, welcoming anyone who'd come your way.
"Hey, Soonyoung-Ssi. I was waiting for you," you smiled, meeting him halfway through the hallway.
With an awkward smile, he gave you a light bow, which you returned. His hand went up to rub at the back of his neck right after, an easy tell of his nerves, "Hah, sorry for keeping you waiting, I, uh, just lost track of time."
That was believable enough. He was known to lose track of things quite often. Sometimes even getting lost himself. However, he did not want to give a bad impression, so he felt slightly bad despite your demeanor not expressing any disappointment.
"That's fine, don't worry about it," you reassured him before peaking behind him into the length of the hallway, "Uh, why are your members crowding by the elevator?", you chuckled.
Fuck, were they still back there? They were supposed to drop him off and leave right after.
"Oh, they're just-"
"Hey, Kwannie! Guys! Come over here!", you called out to them in your usual friendly demeanor, turning back to face him afterwards, "The fans would love it if we all do it together," you smiled at him, clearly unaware that Soonyoung had meant to get you alone.
And that's how his plan got ruined within less than a minute of alone time with you.
"Oh, uh, yeah, for sure," he mustered a smile at you – which was mostly genuine, as he couldn't help himself in smiling when you were so likable.
The guys looked thrown off by you calling them over, but followed through with your direction regardless. In only a few moments you were all inside your group's designated practice room as you propped up the staff-assigned phone and turned on the speakers in order to learn the short dance.
"So, who wants to help me with the dance?", you asked.
"I, uh-"
"Hoshi's an amazing teacher. He can show it to you!", interrupted Jeonghan before Soonyoung could stammer his way through an answer.
Being practically pushed towards you by both Joshua and Jeonghan, he awkwardly stepped forward, dumbly lifting a hand to uselessly wave at you shyly as he nodded.
You giggled(?) at this, scrunching up your face in what he believed to be cuteness(???), nodding at him in return.
"Yeah, we actually gotta go. We have a shoot coming up. We were just dropping Soonie off," said Jeonghan again, lying through his teeth.
Soonyoung knew that Jeonghan's original plan had been to spy on him as he fumbled his way through interacting with you, but since you'd spotted them, now Jeonghan had to come up with an excuse to leave Soonyoung alone with you. At least he was following through in wing-manning him.
Pouting, you okay'd Jeonghan and Joshua's departure, bidding goodbye to the two boys whom Soonyoung knew you considered to be friends of yours (unlike himself), leaving you alone with Kwannie and Soonyoung.
Seeing as Seungkwan was your best friend, it was unlikely you'd buy any excuse he had to leave you alone with Soonyoung without him having to at least allude the boy's embarrassing crush on you, – something that was completely out of limits – so now Soonyoung was stuck with a chaperone for his interaction with you. It wasn't what he was expecting, but it also took some pressure off him. Kwannie was a natural mood-maker.
After a few minutes of warming up together, Kwannie gestured at you to get into positions so Soonyoung could show you the dance, with Kwan following along in order to help your learning process quicken.
You got the majority of it pretty quickly – or at least for the most part. There was one complicated part of the footwork you seemed to be having a bit of complications with, causing Seungkwan to intervene.
"Hoshi, why don't you help her out? Come here," he gave Hoshi a look, eyes gesturing at him to come stand by your side.
Dumbly, he followed along, never in the state of mind to deny you (nor Seungkwan, apparently). With a nod of confirmation from you, he stood right by your side, slowing down his movements in order to break down the moves required for the dance.
You audibly awe'd at him and his skill, making him blush and look down, not wanting you to see his reddened face. Seungkwan snorted lowly in the background, something you luckily were too distracted to pay mind to, too into Soonyoung's dancing to notice.
"Uh, did you get that or should I go slower?", he asked after the fact.
"No, that's perfect, Soonyoung-Ssi, thank you," you gave him a casual bow of your head, "Wow, you're insanely good. Sorry if that's too informal to say," you praised him, not realizing such compliment would take him all the way to another universe.
"Ah, no, it's nothing, hah-"
"No, really! You should be a teacher. I think I got it all now. Look," you insisted, stopping to do a quick run-through of the 15-second dance in absolute perfection (at least if Soonyoung had anything to say about it), giggling by the end of it.
Seungkwan interrupted once more before Soonyoung could shower you with compliments over your dancing, "You know, he comes up with a lot of our choreos. He teaches us them, too."
Seungkwan hyping him up to you was very out of character, but Soonyoung was willing to take anything that could get you the tiniest bit interested in him. And it seemed like it worked, as you audibly gasped at that bit of information, turning to compliment him once more.
"Really? Wow, that's insane. Can I- You should show me sometime," you suggested, "I try to help with the creative process of my group's choreos sometimes, but it all gets meddled in my head. I could really use some pointers."
Soonyoung would be willing to make entire choreos for you on his own if you so much as asked, so of course he'd jump at the chance to help you with anything you needed. If you wanted him to cut his day short right this moment and drop everything to help you out, he'd do it without a second thought. Any motive to spend time with you one-on-one sounded more than reasonable to him.
"Yes, o-of course," he nodded enthusiastically while Seungkwan made a face in the background.
The next twenty minutes or so were spent recording the short video, attempting to get a perfect take in order to hand over to staff for posting. You stood in the middle while the two boys danced next to you. Hoshi was smiling like an idiot all throughout as he thought of the concept of the two of you dancing together on video. Maybe after this it could become a more common occurrence.
"Well, I'm gonna go now," said Seungkwan after it was all said and done, having settled on one of the many recordings you'd taken, "Gotta go have lunch with Gyu. I'll see you later Y/Nie," he gave you a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek as goodbye. Hoshi hoped his jealous grimace wasn't noticed by you.
You furrowed your brows at his sudden departure, but made no comment about it otherwise.
"Okay, Kwannie. Call me later tonight?"
"Sure," he agreed, then turning to Soonyoung, "Send me some of those videos," he said as one last statement before leaving.
"Oh!" you exclaimed, "Send me them too? Here, I'll give you my KakaoTalk," you reached out your hand to silently ask him to hand you his phone as you walked over to his side.
Fuck. Your number? He was going to have your personal contact info on his phone?
Granted, he could've just asked Seungkwan or one of the other guys for your number, but he wanted to get it out of your own volition. And now he was currently standing next to you, faces far too close as you both leaned down to look at his phone screen watching you type in your info. He could've sworn you leaned even closer when you heard him gulp, but it was probably just wishful thinking.
"Here," you said when you were finally done, handing him his phone back – and gracing his hand with your own in the process, a detail Soonyoung found extremely important to fixate on.
He thanked you with a nod, putting the phone away and wracking his brain to think of anything he could possibly say to extend your time together. With Seungkwan around, he hadn't even had the chance to talk to you at all.
"Hey," you spoke up before he could, "We're announcing our comeback next week- oh, uh, don't tell anyone, by the way," you giggled at your own interjection, "Do you think maybe you'd like to do our choreo with me for a TikTok?", you asked, "You know, just the two of us?"
The last question really threw him off guard. But what threw him off guard even more was the look you gave him afterward. Your eyebrows were lifted and your front teeth were softly biting onto the plush of your bottom lip. It was suggestive, but not too obvious. Soonyoung was unsure of how to read it, but considering the fact that he was already head over heels for you, the mere implication of your gaze on him had his heart accelerating and his head inflating like a balloon.
"O-oh, yes. I- Yes. We can totally do that," he agreed far too enthusiastically, "You can just call me- or- or text me, if that's better for you," he stammered.
You bit your lip again, but this time it was to try and fail to hold in a giggle. Nodding at him, you thanked him, letting him know you'd be contacting him soon.
"Let me know when the TikTok gets posted, okay?", you said afterwards.
"It'll probably get posted today or tomorrow. You'll see it on the official account-"
You interrupted him, "Text me either way, yeah?", you spoke again, now in a slightly more direct way, giving him a look that made him realize you were conveying some sort of hint to him.
He wasn't sure what you meant by this, but he nodded dumbly at you, not willing to pass up an opportunity to talk to you again. This was when the two of you finally bid your goodbyes, with you catching him off guard by offering him a quick hug before walking him out of your practice room.
Slightly dumbfounded, Soonyoung slowly walked away, heading towards the elevator through which he'd come in less than thirty minutes ago, trying to process what'd happened during the last five minutes of his visit.
Sometimes he hated how easy it was for things to fly over his head, but there was just absolutely no way you'd been flirting with him just now, was there? You were friendly, as you always were, but the very subtle looks and the suggestion of texting each other – and even hanging out alone next time – gave him the tiniest of hopes that maybe you'd taken an interest to him.
He decided to shrug this off for now, entirely too sure that there'd be no way for you to flirt with him, much less like him when he was always such a stammering mess around you.
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Within a day, the TikTok had been posted, garnering excited reactions from fans who enjoyed both of your groups. Unlike the endless times before, you had not done the dance challenge with Seungkwan but also with Hoshi, causing a bit of extra excitement among both of your fans. This made Soonyoung giddier than he'd like to admit. Knowing your fans enjoyed seeing you together made him smile far too hard.
As promised, he knew he had to text you about the TikTok. It was likely you'd already seen it, as it'd already been a few hours since its release. However, Soonyoung was not about to miss the opportunity to start a thread of communication with you. This would be the first step to consistent communication with you (or so he hoped).
After mulling over it for a few hours, he landed on a simple text, one that did not showcase his excitement to be speaking to you – Jeonghan had said that that might scare you away – but simply informed you of the release of the TikTok.
hey, it's hoshi :)
the video got posted on seventeen's official account. the fans really like it ㅋㅋ here's the link
[TikTok link]
Surprisingly, you had responded quite quickly, making Soonyoung somehow fall even more enamored with you by the way you texted.
thank uuu hoshi nim !!!!
we look so good omg :D
i'll let u know when we can do my group's tiktok okay ? ill see u soon !!! <3
It'd be odd for any other guy to sigh so adoringly at their phone at such simple messages, but none of the guys gave him too much shit for how often he stared at your messages with awe in his eyes. You just sounded so enthusiastic to speak to him, and- Okay, he knew he was overthinking it. You were probably just someone who conveyed their emotions through text (he was too!!!). He just liked knowing that he was now somewhere in your KakaoTalk, ready for any time you wanted to message him. And that heart? He was swooning over the simple gesture, but that was something he couldn't get to without going on ten different tangents about how much he liked you (His friends had already heard them all).
~
"Oh, really? She wants to see you again?", asked Seungkwan later that same day upon hearing that you'd asked Soonyoung to meet later on to record alone.
It was the usual time for dance practice, though currently it was just a few of the members in the practice room as they waited for the rest to show up. These moments would usually be taken up by life updates on each other or by a few overly-competitive rounds of badminton.
"Hold on. Y/N?," asked Chan who just happened to be walking in, "Congrats, man. You've been crushing on her since forever," he gave him a pat on the back in encouragement, joining in on the conversation.
Seungkwan pouted to himself, "She asked you? She always asks me," he didn't seem actually sad, but just whiny as usual.
"C'mon, Kwannie. Give them some time alone. It's young love," interjected Jeonghan, always the proudly designated Soonyoung-supporter.
"Hah," Soonyoung chuckled shyly, looking down, "It's nothing. It's not like I asked her out or anything," he added.
"Well, this is your chance," encouraged Joshua, who had previously been toying with a racket to offer up a round of badminton to the guys, "She gave you her number completely unprovoked. You just need to open up a bit and let her get to know you."
It was all good advice. Great, even. Except that Soonyoung was an anomaly of a guy. Despite how outgoing he seemed to everyone around him (even his fans), he was actually quite shy and reserved when it came to people he wasn't familiar with. You being someone he didn't know too personally and his years-long crush simply did not help matters.
"Yeah, I'll try, just- Fuck, she makes me so nervous. I don't wanna be too obvious," he expressed one of his many concerns.
"Too late," Seungkwan murmured lowly, looking away to act as if he hadn't said anything.
"What do you mean ...," asked Soonyoung with widened eyes.
"Dude, you kept staring at her the whole time we were dancing. And every time she tried to speak to you, you stumbled over your words like an idiot. If she didn't clock that you liked her in those twenty minutes, then she's an idiot – and I'm saying this as her best friend," rambled Seungkwan, letting his friend in on how his interaction with you looked from a third person's point of view.
Soonyoung liked to think that he had enough self-awareness to assess how he was perceived by others. Realistically, however, he knew he lacked the skill to hold in his emotions like the average person. He had fears of being too obvious whilst in your presence, so knowing that he had been too blatantly enamored by you made him cringe internally. The last thing he wanted was to embarrass himself in front of you.
"Fuck, does she-"
"No, I don't think she actually knows. She probably just thinks you're a weirdo," reassured Seungkwan with a sigh, "But isn't that the goal? I mean, for her to know you like her?"
"Yeah, but I have to swoop her off her feet, not make her think I'm some loser who's obsessed with her – I mean, I am, but she doesn't need to know that yet," Soonyoung rambled exasperated.
Joshua, Jeonghan and Chan snickered all at once, finding their friend's ridiculous thought process to be far too funny. As much as they were rooting for him to finally ask you out, watching his strange way of coursing through his crush was something they treasured as a form of entertainment and would be sad to let go off anywhere in the near future. But despite that, they continued their encouragement to get the boy to finally get your sights on him.
"So, what's your plan? Other than pestering me to get her to hang out with you – which, by the way, clearly didn't work," deadpanned Seungkwan.
"I'm just waiting for her to call me so we can do her TikTok challenge. Fuck, should I text her first?", he pondered out loud.
"She told me her comeback's this Friday, but her music video's already out" added Chan, making them all turn to him in question.
"You talk?", whined Hoshi.
Chan nodded slowly as if it were the most obvious thing, "Yeah, we're friends."
Joshua and Jeonghan cackled like hyenas at this, finding Soonyoung's shocked facial expression adorable.
"Am I the only one she's not friends with?!"
"Maybe if you hadn't actively avoided her for years-"
"I didn't mean to! I'm just shy!", he complained, hands lifted as he sighed in frustration, "But no longer! I'm texting her tonight, okay? Next time you see me, I'll be on my way to a situationship – or if luck goes my way, a relationship," he assured.
"Really? Are twenty minutes spent dancing going to make her fall for you? You already tried that, and it failed," deadpanned Seungkwan, "But, I'm rooting for you. Maybe this way you'll finally leave me alone."
That was good enough.
"Any pointers?", asked Soonyoung, "Any intel you guys can give me since you're apparently all part of the 'fuck Soonyoung' club?"
"Just don't do anything stupid," said Seungkwan, all the other boys nodding along.
That was easy enough.
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It was one day later that Soonyoung received a text from you, entailing the time and place in which you'd be needing his presence to record a short TikTok video for your group's newest comeback. As luck may have had it, since your comebacks were so close together, you were attending a music show on the same day. This meant that Seventeen would perform right after your group.
The plan was to meet in the backroom in between shootings, just before your group left to their next schedule of the day. Even if it meant that Soonyoung would get no time to prepare for his own performance, he was confident enough he didn't need the extra practice – plus, meeting up with you took priority in his mind.
On the day of the comeback show, Soonyoung felt nerves he hadn't experienced in years. He had prepared for you as much as he could, taking time out of his day to practice your choreo as soon as your group's music video came out in preparation for your meeting. Dumbly enough, he didn't bother to ask you which part you needed for your TikTok, opting to learn the whole thing instead. He had also asked his stylist to go a little extra hard with his hair and makeup (the thought made him feel like a teenager, but he just wanted to look extra good for you).
It was only some time upon his arrival to the venue that he received a text from you asking for his presence.
meet me in the back ? ;)
The blush that arose from his cheeks couldn't be helped.
The two of you had only texted a handful of times since you'd first given him your number a few days ago, but he always found himself blushing and kicking his feet when you'd text him using your adorable emojis. In his delusional mind, he was the only one you sent those cute hearts and smileys to.
With a nervous intake of breath, Soonyoung walked over to the back of the building – an area idols would sometimes visit for a smoke or to hang out behind anyone's view (even staff). He looked around, finding you leaning against the stairs as you waited for him.
You were still wearing that pretty outfit you had worn during your group's performance (which soonyoung made sure to watch as soon as he arrived). It was adorable, but also dangerous for someone like Hoshi. Donning a cute set that consisted of a pink cropped top with a matching fluffy mini-skirt, your look made Soonyoung almost salivate. You were the perfect mixture of adorable and sexy, reminding him all over again why he had first developed a crush on you (that, and the million other reasons).
Upon spotting him, your face lit up, walking over to him with pep in your step, clearly excited to see him (God, take him now).
"Hoshi-Nim!", you called out excitedly, rushing over to his side and offering him a side hug (Fuck).
Hesitantly returning it, he gave you a shy smile and looked down, too timid to hold eye contact for too long. Noticing this, you giggled.
"Is this a bad time, or do you need to go-"
"No! Seventeen's performance isn't until twenty minutes, so I'm good," he interrupted.
"Okay, great. Uh, do you think you'll be able to learn the dance in that time?"
"Oh, I already learned it," he said surprisingly nonchalantly.
"Huh? What? Like, the whole thing?", you asked incredulously.
Scratching the back of his neck in bashfulness, he nodded, "Yeah, uh, just wanted to save you the trouble?", he chuckled breathlessly.
Your eyes widened as did your smile, furrowing your eyebrows at the unnecessary (but highly admirable) amount of effort Hoshi had put into the basic concept of learning what was supposed to be a short TikTok dance for you.
"God, you learned my whole choreo while doing your group's own comeback? That's ... Wow, that's insane, Hoshi-Nim," you praised in disbelief, "You really didn't have to do that."
Soonyoung couldn't lie. He was reeling at the praise. You seemed both surprised and impressed, which were both reactions he wished to draw out of you more often. Sadly, he felt overwhelmed by the attention you were giving him, so the most response he could give you were shy nods and bashful smiles.
Suddenly, you spoke up again, "Actually, Hoshi-Nim, I, uh, I need help with something else, if that's okay?", you looked up at him with a shy smile, reaching out for his hand.
He nodded numbly, surprised at the request for his hand but knowing he'd agree to anything you asked without even needing to know what it was.
Grabbing his hand, you turned around and began leading him somewhere, "It'll just take a moment, I promise. Just ... just really need your help," you sounded breathless, leading him to believe this must've been far more important than the dance. This made Soonyoung the more willing to help you.
Before arriving to your destination, you hesitantly looked back at him as you both walked over to a closed door, Hoshi unknowing of what you needed from him. It appeared as if you were in distress, pondering about something, but saying nothing to him.
Leading him to a small and empty waiting room in the back, you pulled him in, closing the door behind you before turning to him. Before he could verbalize his curiosity, you jumped at him, pulling him down as you stood on your tippy toes and connected your lips in a frantic kiss.
His hair was grabbed at and pulled at in ways that had his eyes rolling. His tongue was sucked at and lips were nibbled at, pulling breathy whines out of him. The quickness in which he fell into the kiss was a bit ridiculous, not even bothering to question what was happening before whining into your mouth and enclosing his arms around you, pulling you even closer.
Pathetic breaths of your name escaped his lips and entered yours. He found himself unable to stop himself from following your every whim, molding his body to your own as you pulled him closer and took all you needed from his lips.
His mind could not process what was happening, so he let his body take the wheel and seek every bit of pleasure he could from yours. His hands were too timid to feel you up the way his body ached to, so he simply let them lay limp on your hips, squeezing any time your kiss became particularly nasty that he couldn't help but react.
Suddenly you began pulling away, pulling a high-pitched whine from his lips as he attempted to follow you, breathing out a tiny 'please' when your tongue came out to give his lips one last swipe.
"Fuck, I'm sorry, I-", you began, "I just- Was that too much? Fuck, I should've asked-"
He shook his head almost aggressively, "N-no, you can do whatever you want! That's- It's totally fine. You don't have to ask, just- Fuck, never ask."
Your hands went up to caress at his cheeks, distress still in your eyes, "I just- I know that you like me, and I just couldn't hold back anymore," you gulped, "You're just so sweet and, shit, the fact that you like me so much makes me- God, I can't think," you rambled.
"You ... you knew? I- How? Did I- Was I so obvious?", he gaped at you, though did not react too much as he did not want to cause you to take your hands off him (He needed your hands on him).
You giggled a bit, "Well, yes, and, uh," you winced in anticipation for your next statement, "Kwannie might've let it slip while we were drunk a few months ago ..."
"He what?!"
"He didn't realize! I don't think he even knows he did it," you defended your friend, "Plus, it's a good thing, since, you know," you smiled at him, hands going from his cheeks to the back of his head, toying with the hair there, "Now I can have some fun with you ..."
The atmosphere changed entirely for Hoshi when you said those words. The lust was back in your eyes and he completely mirrored it – though a little more sheepishly.
"Oh, I ..." he chuckled shyly, "You ... Fuck, you want to have fun with me?"
You nodded, biting your lip.
"W-what type of fun?", he blinked, breathless.
"Can I show you?"
"Fuck, p-please ..."
Your proud smile was the last thing he saw before you closed the gap once more, trapping his lips in another heady kiss. Bonelessly, he followed your rhythm, though in a much more timid manner. While your hands felt and pulled at every inch they liked, his own remained respectfully on your hips. Despite how much his carnal side wanted to take over, he was in such absolute awe of you he couldn't bring himself to think straight and act.
Luckily for him, you were far more proactive than him.
Grabbing onto his rigid hands, you led them down to your ass, encouraging him to feel you up as you had been doing to his chest and hair. At this, he moaned into your mouth, hands now achieving a newfound confidence, beginning to feel you up all over. His hands went over and under your fluffy skirt, occasionally going up to squeeze at your breasts. His actions were rewarded by breathy sighs of his name into his lips, something which he had only ever dreamed about before.
"Soonie ...", you breathed against his mouth, "Is it okay if I call you that? Soonie?"
"Call me anything you want, just- don't stop kissing me," he groaned, making a beeline right back to your lips.
"But ..." you barely managed to get out as his lips chased your own needily, "I wanna- wanna suck your dick," you moaned.
Fuck.
His brain stopped computing for a moment. His heart stopped and his knees buckled. No part of his being worked accordingly as he attempted to process a visual of what you'd just said.
You on your knees, his dick in mouth?
It was borderline pathetic the way in which he moaned into your lips, attacking you with a wet and wanton kiss that could barely meet your lips as he nodded desperately and panted a chorus of 'yesyesyesyesyes' into your mouth.
You found him entertaining, or so it seemed going by your giggle in response before dropping down to your knees. Undoing his performance outfit, you pulled down his pants just enough, only to find an achingly hard cock.
"Just from kissing?" you teased with another wicked giggle as you began to put him in hand.
"I'm so fucking obsessed with you," he whined without thinking, "I'd get hard from you just looking at me."
Soonyoung could feel the shudder that passed through your body at his words.
Oh. You liked his desperation? His pathetic want for you? Luckily for you, Soonyoung had an endless amount of desperation ready to feed you with.
"Tell me more," you said before tilting his cock towards your mouth, beginning to teasingly kitten-lick at the tip.
Now it was his turn to shudder, visibly shaking at the barely-there contact.
"You- you're so fucking perfect ..." he breathed as you continued to lick at him, "I think about you all the time, I- Just have you on my mind every day," he revealed.
"And what do you think about?", you pondered out loud, "This?", you asked before enveloping him in your lips, suckling at the tip of his cock.
"T- think, f-fuck- Think about how pretty you are ... How talented and funny, and- and how much I wanna impress you," he panted out truthfully, whining when he turned to look down at you and found your drooling face staring back up at him as your eyebrows scrunched up in effort.
The sight only made him cry out harder, churning out even more embarrassing confessions.
"A-and I think about how h-happy I could make you ... I'd give you everything and ... and I'd make you feel so fucking good ..." he panted out.
You only went deeper on his cock at the slight allusion, gagging around him with purpose in your eyes. His strangled gasp in response caused you to repeat this movement repeatedly as your hands went up to toy at his balls, stimulating him far too much for a guy who had stupidly assumed all he'd be doing with you today would be dancing.
"Please ... please, can I cum? I need- need to cum. Can't hold it back, y-you're so fucking pretty," his hands wrapped even harder around your hair, destroying the well-crafted hairdo your stylists must've taken an hour orchestrating.
Finally pulling away for air, you gasped to take in as much air as possible before licking at him again in order to slowly regain your breath.
"Just one more minute, Soonie? Be good and wait, yeah?," you murmured, "Tell me what else you've been thinking about, baby. Then I'll let you cum," you requested before wrapping your lips around him again.
Nodding with an empty head, he did as you instructed, wanting nothing more than to cum (even though it was embarrassingly fast).
"Thin-think about how fucking sexy you look on stage, how ... how confident a-and sure of yourself you are ... N-no one's ever made me feel this way. So nervous when you're around. Can't think, can't breathe, can't- oh, oh, fuck. Please, I- F-fuck ..." his rambles detailing his infatuation were halted by your sudden increase of speed in movements, causing his orgasm to break through without any warning.
Soonyoung had no time to feel embarrassed over how little he'd lasted with your mouth around his dick when you'd so enthusiastically continued to suck at him throughout his orgasm, humming at every drop you swallowed.
Crying out in sensitivity (both at the feeling and sight), Soonyoung's teary eyes met your own, sniffling as you finally pulled yourself away from him and stood up to attempt and meet his height again. Wordlessly, you wiped at the few lone tears that strayed away due to the suden impact of his orgasm, kissing him softly as you did so.
He wantonly licked into your mouth, whining when he was able to taste himself in your tongue. Continuing to kiss you, he chased after your lips when you attempted to pull away multiple times, causing you both to chuckle breathlessly at each other.
"Was that what you hoped when you thought about me?", you asked whilst biting back a smile.
Nodding enthusiastically, he agreed, "That was perfect- you're perfect."
"Sorry if that was too much, I just-"
His hands went to hold at your arms, halting your speech, "No! Never apologize. You can do whatever you want to me. Always. Trust me," he insisted with a serious yet air-headed look in his eyes.
Giggling, you gave up on apologizing for having jumped him so suddenly just minutes ago.
"Wait, fuck!", he suddenly let out, "I have to be on stage in like five minutes. Shit, I need my hair redone and- oh, wait, we didn't get to do your TikTok. Do you wanna-"
"No, it's okay, Soonyoung. Go get ready. We can just meet up later for the video, okay?," you reassured him, leading him out of the room you'd cornered him in and beginning to walk towards where he needed to be, with you having to push him along, as he was too distracted.
"Yeah, okay. Great," he began walking away from you before turning back, "Can- Can I call you? Later, I mean?", he cringed internally at how not smooth that was.
You giggled at him again, nodding, "Yes, Soonyoung. You can call me any time. Good luck with your stage," you took a few steps and planted a kiss on his cheek, finally walking away for real after that.
Leaving a wordless Soonyoung behind, he finally began processing what had just happened, gulping at the thought.
Had he really just hooked up with you in a lone room buried in the basement floor of Inkigayo?
Had he really confessed to his crush whilst she knelt before him, cock in mouth and watery eyes staring up at him?
Fuck, how was he supposed to perform now?
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"No way."
"You're lying. There's literally no way that happened."
"She let you hit?!"
"Well, uh, not exactly," Soonyoung scratched the back of his head awkwardly at all the attention he was suddenly receiving from his friends.
As the loudmouth he was known to be, he had made the mistake of airing out what had happened between the two of you earlier that day. After a few takes of their comeback performance, his group and staff headed back to Hybe, where Soonyoung and some of his members arrived to practice.
Although Soonyoung had not shared the explicit details of what had happened, – nor had he meant to in the first place – he had made the mistake of implied that you had done something. Okay, yeah, maybe he did use the word 'hooked up' without realizing the implications it could have. Could he be blamed? He was still on a high from you even giving him the time of day!
"What happened, exactly?", asked Seungkwan with a groan. Two minutes into the conversation and he was already fed up of Soonyoung. The usual.
"I'm not sure if I should say," he started.
No part of him wanted to air you out for any promiscuous activities you may take part in – even if they had been with him. He also did not want to disrespect your trust. Seungkwan was your best friend, though, so he'd know eventually. Right?
"Dude, just spit it out!", demanded Seokmin, yet another member who had been let in on the situation at some point.
"We kissed ... and uh, other things ... maybe," he added after a pause, almost unable to hide his sheepish smile at the memory.
Jeonghan was the first to react, followed by Joshua. Both their eyes widened as they approached Soonyoung to dap him up, hyping him for his accomplishment.
"Okay, no more details, please. I don't want to think about my best friend in that way," cringed Seungkwan, still offering Soonyoung a congratulatory pat in the back whilst sporting a disgusted grimace.
"And then what happened?", asked Chan, cocking his head to the side.
"Then I had to leave to perform."
Then there was a short pause.
"Dude!"
"Are you serious?"
"You just left??"
They all took turns in shifting the atmosphere to one of annoyance rather than congratulating him like they had just been doing.
"She told me to leave," he clarified quickly, "Fuck, should I call her? I said I would. What should I say? What do you say after your crush sucks the life out of you in a basement? Shit, should I have stopped her?", he rambled with questions, a worried look in his eye.
"First of all, chill," started Seungkwan, "second of all, if she did it, it was because she wanted to. I know her, she would've told you to fuck off if she didn't like you. Just be a man, for once, and call her," he reprimanded.
"Fuck, okay, yeah. I'll call her – now. I'll call her right now," he nodded decisively, beginning to gather his things to leave, "Uh, you guys can practice without me for today. Oh, and Seungkwan?", he added before leaving.
"What?"
"I owe you one!", he said with zero context as to what he was referring to, leaving a confused Seungkwan behind to ponder what he had meant.
Maybe one day he'd remember to formally thank his friend for accidentally confessing to his crush on his behalf, but for now his mind was muddled solely with thoughts of you and calling you to see if maybe you'd be willing to see him again as soon as possible. Today, maybe? He needed to confess to you formally, not as he pathetically came in your mouth before leaving you to perform.
~
"Hello?"
"You picked up! Okay, good. Hi."
"You know, you're way less smooth than I thought," you laughed.
"Are you saying I have no rizz?", he pouted through the phone.
"Maybe. Depends what you're calling me for?", your tone shifted to a more suggestive tone.
"Fuck, please walk me through this. I have no idea how to talk to you," whined Soonyoung, deciding to lay all cards on the table. You already knew he was pathetically into you, what harm could it bring?
You hummed as you pondered what he said, clicking your tongue, "When are you free?"
"For you? Any time," he replied with a quickness.
"So, tonight?"
"Yes," he said without a second thought.
"Shit. You really like me, huh?"
"So fucking much. I could go on about it forever. Just, you know, maybe not while you're making me lose my mind on some public basement," he laughed airily, wincing internally at how pathetic he must've sounded earlier that day.
"Yeah? Wanna come over and tell me more about it?", you dared.
"Please text me your address and I'll be there within the next hour," he practically pleaded. On further thought, he still sounded pathetic while speaking to you. Maybe some things just could not be helped.
"I'll see you here at ten, okay?" you made a kissy sound to him and hung up before he could say anything else, sending him a text with your address just moments later.
Soonyoung sighed as he let himself slouch back on the couch he'd been sitting on, still finding himself at his company's building, as the need to call you was too big for him to arrive home before doing so. For now, he'd be able to make a stop home before heading over to your place. It was still early and he needed to bathe and wash and pamper himself to the best of his ability (Just in case his visit was going to be as suggestive as your voice had been on the call).
Having a chance to think over the past day on his way to his home, he realized that his debilitating shyness around you had died off the moment you kissed him, instead becoming a newfound sense of neediness he didn't know he had in him. He accepted it – specially since you seemed to like it. However, he had hopes that he'd be able to talk to you a bit – and maybe finally get to ask you out –tonight at your place.
From what Seungkwan had said (along with the way you interacted with him), he believed there was a chance you liked him back. You wouldn't have kissed him (nor given him the head of his life) if you didn't like him at least a bit. You also wouldn't laugh so much while talking to him (nor smile at him so often) if you didn't feel anything for him.
These were his thoughts and hopes throughout the night as he readied himself for you.
~
A few hours later and he now found himself in front of your gated home. It had taken some effort to get here, seeing as it was rare for you to give out your address (As a fellow idol, he understood), but he was still on time.
He knew that the cool thing to do would've been to arrive a little late or maybe even skip it altogether to get your curiosity about him to heighten more, but he was too excited to see you to even think about playing any games. With some treats in hand (which he knew you liked, as per Seungkwan's input), he rang your doorbell and awaited your arrival.
Upon seeing you, he gulped. You weren't wearing anything particularly racy – just some loungewear. Unfortunately for Soonyoung, he had a thing for you in loungewear, apparently. You donned a white tank top and some sweats, which somehow managed to contour your body perfectly for his viewing. The comfort that radiated from you also made Soonyoung feel a mixture of softness and want for you. His feelings for you at the moment were complicated – all he knew was that he wanted you; whether that was in a pure or filthy way, he wasn't sure.
"Hi," was all he could bring himself to say.
"Hi, Soonyoung. Come in?", you moved to the side to let him in.
He walked in, taking in your place and how much of you it contained. Or well, that's what he planned to do until you grabbed his hand and prevented his wandering, leading him over to a large couch in what he assumed to be your living room.
Wordlessly, you took the treats from his hands and sat him down decisively, immediately going to straddle him and placing your hands on his shoulders. He was intimidated by your straightforwardness, but immediately too into it, whining into your lips the mere moment your mouths connected. His hands were less timid this time around, holding onto your hips and attempting to pull you closer to him.
"Fuck, I've wanted you all day," you sighed into his lips.
"I've wanted you for years," he breathed against your own, following your lips any second they were away from his.
"Are you gonna show me?"
"Yes, fuck. I'll do anything you want, however you want," he promised as your lips went down to his neck, sighing at every kiss against his skin.
"Fuck, why did you wear so many clothes?", you groaned at the jacket that was in your way, also referring to the thick jeans he was currently sporting under you.
"I- I thought we were just going to watch a movie or something," he explained shyly.
As stupid as it sounded the second he said it, he truly was not expecting you to jump him for a second time in the same day. He had truly expected the two of you to talk or simply hang out before your next sexual encounter. However, he was unable to find any complaints regarding his current situation.
His statement must've given you some sort of reaction, as you disconnected your lips from his neck and leaned back to face him with a look of awe in your eyes.
"Soonie, fuck, you're too cute," you groaned, hand going up to his cheek as your thumb caressed the skin there, "You almost make me feel bad for wanting you so bad," you muttered before going back to your regular volume of voice, "I promise we'll talk, baby. I just- I've been wet since I sucked you off today," you explained, giving him no time to respond before kissing him again.
The couch you were currently sitting on squeaked at the brand new movement above it as you began softly grinding against Soonyoung, damning any layers in between you.
"I- I wanted to return the favor, I swear!", he managed to pant out, mind leaving him a little more every time your hips connected with his, "I had to go, I didn't- I didn't mean to leave you like that," explained in deep breaths.
"I know, Soonie. Which is why you're going to make it up to me. Right, baby?," you coo'd against his lips, licking at them when he pouted and nodded in response.
Only a few more moments of making out and dry humping took place before you began growing restless above him, whimpering any time your cunt would grace against the harsh button of his jeans. Your sweats were thin enough for Soonyoung to know that the mutual humping of his hips must've been getting you off (at least going off by the increasingly high cries you were breathing into his mouth).
"I want you to fuck me," you suddenly said when you pulled back for air, messily getting off his lap and dragging him with you, hard dick standing up and all.
Almost robotically, he followed you to your room, surprised when you sat down this time, seemingly directing for him to be on top. Before he could begin to crawl over you, however, you stopped him with a palm to his chest, nodding at him to take off his clothes.
"Clothes off, baby. I'll take mine off too."
He stood frozen for a second at the mention of you getting undressed, staring down at you as you nonchalantly threw off every item, leaving you fully naked in front of him as you sat back on the edge of the bed.
"Soonie? Clothes?", you asked.
"O-oh, right," he stammered, eyes still not leaving your breasts.
Despite having had no higher education during his twenties, he was sure he could write a whole dissertation on every curve of your body. Every freckle and line of your skin had him too distracted to take off his clothes without tripping every few seconds. You might've been giggling at the sight, he wasn't too sure since his eyes, ears, and entire mind were in tune to the view from your shoulders and below.
Finally undressed, he hesitantly walked over to your spot on the bed, only to be beat by you when you suddenly crawled further on the bed, somehow conjuring a condom from under your pillow as you turned around and set yourself in all fours, presenting him with your- oh fuck.
Soonyoung could've sworn he lost his mind the moment you arched your back just a little more as he approached you, almost dropping to his knees at the sight. He felt like an animal in heat, while also having an understanding of what it must be like to be a starving man in search of his next meal. His body was begging him to grab that condom and insert himself as deep in you as it was humanly possible, hammering into you until he cried at the stimulation.
It was the weaker part of him, however, that won.
His shaky hands reached for the condom you'd placed on the highest point of your back, struggling to put it in due to the sheer need running through his veins. After that, his hands finally went to your bare hips, feeling them up and down in absolute awe. One of his hands came to the arch of your back, toying with the thought of pressing it even lower and audibly groaning when you actually followed through and ended up pressing your ass even further against him.
"It's stressing me out how badly I want you," he cried out, sniffling, "I'm going to burst the moment I'm inside you," he verbalized his fear.
"Me too, Soonie ..." you sighed, "Been waiting for you all day ... Need you to fuck me already," you practically pleaded. Pleaded, as in pleading for him. He was sure you wanted him dead.
Nodding to himself, he began lining himself up, unable to resist the temptation to let his tip toy at your folds despite how such sensation made his eyes roll back in pleasure. His groans got louder at your own reaction – even more pleas of his name to finally fuck you.
Unable to hold back any longer, Soonyoung finally penetrated you, instantly regretting it, as he knew there would be no way for him to ever feel such pleasure ever again.
It was mixture of his feelings for you paired by the natural desperation he felt at having all these years of anticipation come to a close. Having dreamt about you for countless nights, he'd torture himself with unachievable thoughts of you. Now that he finally had you, pretty and stuffed under him, his mind could not process how tight and hot and wet you felt around him.
"It's so good, oh, fuck, it's so- you feel so fucking good," he panted out in strangled breaths, beginning to hump against your ass.
The slaps of his hips against your ass sounded so filthy to him in that moment, but it only heightened his drive even more. He was known to have a tiger's stamina for a reason.
"Mphm, t-tell me how it feels," he pleaded after some moments of not hearing much from you. Suddenly a wail released from your lips, making his cock twitch inside you at the sound.
"C-can't, it's too good. So big, fuck", you gasped intermittently.
"Right? Made for me ... Right? She's just for me, isn't she? So wet and tight for me," he knew that maybe personifying your pussy mid sex could be a turn off for some people, but was pleased when the sudden tightness of your pussy confirmed that he'd been correct in assessing you – you were a freak just like him.
"She needs more, Soonie," you begged.
How was he to deny you when you'd been so good? When you were the girl of his dreams, granting him access to the pussy that starred every single one of his filthiest dreams for years?
His hips sped up, likely bruising your ass with the intensity of the skin slapping. You had no complaints, though, continuing to occasionally cry out his name accompanied by babbles.
He was not doing any better, practically drooling both at the sight and feeling of you.
"Tell me you like me," he suddenly pleaded, knowing his orgasm wad approaching, "Please."
"So much, Soonie. So- so sweet for me. Like you so much," you confirmed in between hiccups of pleasure.
"Oh, fuck, thank God," he sighed in relief, hips going even harder at the confirmation of you liking him back. This meant that he'd get to have you again and again, and not only that, but he'd also get to hold your hand and put a heart next to your contact name and bring you over to meet his mom and-
"I'm so close, Soonie," you interrupted with the prettiest breath of desperation Soonyoung had ever heard.
"S-say it again," he cried, using his last efforts to prolong his orgasm long enough to achieve yours before he finally broke down.
"I like you s-so fucking much, Soonyoung," you repeated, "You're so handsome and sweet, and- and you like me so much," you explained in between gasps every time his hips would hit that spongy spot inside you that had your eyes rolling back.
Every word went straight to his cock, breaking him and bringing forth his orgasm sooner than he had anticipated. In sheer desperation, his hand went under you, rapidly toying at your swollen bud in order to get you there with him. There was no way he was going to cum without you twice in a single day.
Crying out uncontrollably, he became a senseless mess, hips having lost all their rhythm and nonsensical babbles filled with praise leaving his lips. He hadn't realized your orgasm had arrived until he felt you tighten up impossibly tightly around him, having been too into his own to notice. Regardless, his inner instinct commanded him to buck into you as you went through your high, ignoring any sensibility he may have felt. Your pleasure was his priority, now and from then on.
"P-please, Soonie, it's too much, it's- Oh, fuck. Like that. Just like that, Ah!", you moaned for him up until your arms gave out, forcing you to fall against the bed and bury your head in the sheets, muffling every whimper Soonyoung dreaded to miss.
He reasoned it was fine. Now that he knew you liked him back, he'd be able to draw orgasm after orgasm out of you. A sinister part of him was bugging at him to flip you over as soon as your orgasm subsided and force at least three more out of you as he buried his face between your legs, but he didn't want to scare you off with his sick addiction to you just yet.
That, and the fact that his mind was only seconds from melting away as your cunt insisted on sucking him in, disregarding how sensitive his cock was. The only thought in his mind at the moment was constant silent praise to your cunt and to yourself for having allowed him access to your bare body.
"Shit .... God, I really wasn't expecting that," you panted out after your orgasm had ended, gasping when he finally pulled out without warning, "You're kind of insane for someone so shy," you added as you caught your breath.
Chuckling as he helped you lay on your back, he reached over to some tissues on your end table and cleaned you up a bit, proceeding to remove his condom and getting up to throw it out along with the tissues. When he made it back to the bed, you were already laying under the covers, laying on your side and staring up at him with a suggestive smile.
Giggling at you, he giddily got under the covers. It was insanely hard to control the gigantic grin that took over his face when you instantly cuddled into him, letting him nuzzle his face into your breasts. If there was a heaven, this was it.
"Was I good?", he mumbled into your skin, not able to help himself in laying a few kisses here and there.
Your hand felt heavenly as it scratched at his scalp, allowing no space in between you as you cocooned him against you, legs wrapped around his waist holding him hostage.
"Are you serious? I think you broke me. Wasn't expecting you to be so ... horny."
"I'm always horny for you," he said nonchalantly.
It was amusing to him how easily he found comfort in you so soon. Only a few hours prior, he was a stuttering mess, yet he his nose was now deeply buried between your breasts, hands on your as as he held you against him, a feeling of ease floating around the room.
"Stop," you dragged out the vowel, laughing at how ridiculous his answers always were, "You're gonna make me like you even more."
"Not more than I like you," he rebutted, squeezing you closer in some sort of act of defiance, "Let me take you out?", he then asked, poking his face out of chest to stare up at you with wide eyes.
"I'd be an idiot to say no," you started, "Yes, Soonyoung. I've been waiting for you to ask," you added, scooting down on the bed so you could finally be face to face with the boy.
Gaping at you, he opened and closed his mouth a few times, "Oh my God. How long have you liked me?"
"Ever since Seungkwan told me, I've been trying to get you alone, but you'd always run away," you giggled, "Realizing you'd always avoid me because you liked me just made me so ... endeared. I was so happy when Kwan told me you wanted to do that TikTok dance with me," you revealed, kissing at his cheeks by the end of it.
Groaning, he nuzzled into your tits again, humming at the vibration of your body as you laughed at him again, "Fuck, I know I should've just asked you out. You just made me so nervous."
"Well, we can make up for the lost time now," you assured, cuddling into him, "You still need to take me out."
"I'll take you out every day," he hummed, "But first, I owe Seungkwan a drink," he added, drinking in yet another giggle from you.
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to read short 3.4 word continuation you can go join my monthly tier on kofi or patreon!
content: sub!soonyoung, body worship, hoshi being down horrendously bad, afab reader, smut, oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, etc.
wc: 888 (teaser); 3425 (full drabble)
sneak peak:
"Can you get off my friend?"
"Do you mean my girlfriend?"
"It's been like half a day, stop saying that," groaned Seungkwan, staring you and Soonyoung down as you lounged around the hardwood floors of their practice room, cuddled up as if you hadn't just had your first date yesterday.
Soonyoung hadn't had the pleasure of knowing you on a personal level for too long (meaning he'd literally only made eye contact with you for the first time less than a week ago), but he had grasped your humor and boundaries pretty quickly. He knew you had no issue with how intense he was with his feelings for you, simply giggling along with him when he'd call you girlfriend or even wife. You said you found his crush cute and as a great ego-boost, specially since the crush was pretty much mutual (your words, by the way!!).
Seungkwan had been a mixture of elated and annoyed at the news of the two of you dating as soon as he'd seen you walk into the practice room hand by hand. Apparently you had texted him right after sleeping with Soonyoung, entailing your escapades together. Both mortified and proud of his friends now being privy to that information, Soonyoung took it as a welcome to begin parading you around as his girlfriend.
Your first date took place on the following day, manifesting itself as a simple at-home picnic late at night, followed by a sheepish 'first date kiss' at the end of the day and leading to this morning, where Soonyoung begged you to make a stop by his practice room before going to your own.
Your quick stop became a long visit as you became entertained by your friends and Soonyoung, who refused to let you leave. So now you found yourself being hogged by your boyfriend whilst your best friend feigned annoyance at the sight.
"Are you just not going to join us for practice?", Chan eventually approached you after having gone over the choreo a few times with some of the other members.
"I need to make up for lost time," whined Soonyoung, somehow nuzzling further into you.
"How are you not sick of him?", Minghao asked with a lighthearted eye-roll, kicking at Soonyoung's foot on his way by.
"Come on, he's cute," you spoke in defense of him, causing a muffled giggle to vibrate against your chest, a few pecks being left in his wake as a silent thank you.
"Then take him home, he's useless here! Some of us still need to practice," added Seungkwan, joining Minghao with an eye-roll of his own.
Turning to Soonyoung, you nudged him, "What do you say? Want my driver to give you a ride home?", you began leaning up against his wishes, giggling at the way he attempted to keep you cuddled up next to him, "C'mon, Soonie. Your members need to practice."
Getting up, you managed to drag him with you, turning to Seungkwan after the fact.
He pouted at you, giving you a hug goodbye as he usually liked to do, "You don't actually have to go, I was just being annoying," he said into your neck.
"It's fine, Kwannie. Soonyoung said he wanted to head home earlier, I don't know why he dragged me here anyway," you smiled at him before getting pulled away by your touchy boyfriend, who was sticking his tongue out at Kwan in defiance.
"He brought you to show you off," interjected Jeonghan, earning a scowl from Soonyoung.
"Anyways, never again! You can all keep your eyes," he turned to Seungkwan, "and hands off my girlfriend now. Thank you!", he stated like a petulant child, hand sliding down your arm and into your hand before beginning to pull you to the exit.
You giggled at his antics, waving goodbye to your friends before walking away with him.
"Hey," he called your attention once you were out in the hallway.
"Yeah?"
"Can I ... Can I come over to your place instead of having your driver drop me off?", he asked, uncharacteristically shy.
"Hmm? Yeah, of course. Is something wrong?"
He shook his head, "No! Just ... It's been two days since we, you know, and we've been spending all this time together. I didn't want to, like, scare you off or anything ..." he trailed off.
Although he was facing you, his eyes were avoiding your own, likely out of bashfulness. This made you crumble.
"Soonie," you coo'd, taking hold of his cheeks in your hands, "You're not scaring me off. I'm sorry I haven't been as forward about my feelings," you pouted at him, earning a pout in return, "How about you stay over tonight? We can have watch movies and have some fun together? I'll get you a ride back to the company tomorrow morning. What do you think?", your hands went to the back of his neck, lightly pulling at the treces from his mullet.
The slight suggestion to sex was there, but you hadn't meant to highlight it. You mostly just wanted to spend time with him; try to reassure him you enjoyed his company as much as he did yours.
He nodded enthusiastically, "Really? That sounds- that sounds fun," he practically reeled, following along without a second thought when you grabbed at his hand again, pulling him to the elevators.
...
find the 18+ continuation on kofi or patreon!
if you have trouble finding it on there, just let me know!!<3
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d3vilcvntz · 11 months ago
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~•☆ sub bottom afab leon × top male reader
you were assigned as his partner in his new mission of saving the president's daughter. he never talks much, never really paying attention to you unless needed, maybe because you were a new cop, not really skilled in doing these kind of jobs like him.
though, he did warm up slowly after a few hours of being together. a little chit chat to keep yourself sane
this whole situation is not really unusual for you as the zombies apocalypse has been going on for years, but actually involving yourself to save someone so important is something you never done in your life before so it was a little nerve-wracking for you.
you were a bit relieved that at least someone as skilled as him is assigned with you so you wouldn't get yourself killed. the way he fought those monsters is very fascinating for you, you know your way around weapons but not as good as him.
though, he found out that the virus has been inside him and he need to find the cure quickly before he turns into one of those things. you were panicking because you're sure that you won't survive alone if anything happens to him.
it was a relieved when you met a nice stranger who said he have the cure for it, and quickly you bought it and bring it to Leon, who was waiting for you in the nearby cabin
you're not even sure how it comes to this but all you remembered is you coming back bringing him the medicine. he was so cute in this state that you can't help yourself.
you both ended up on the floor with you laying on the cold hard wood and him on top of you. clothes already discarded nearby.
you looked at him, his face flushed from the heat "are u sure you're okay?" you decided to asked him, brushing his hair to the side so you can get a good look at his face. he quickly nodded, slowly lowering himself, your cock slowly making its way in his hole
he rode you slowly, you can clearly see how his pussy swallowed your cock hungrily. he was quite vocal too, you were glad that you chose a place that was far from the village
you're getting close and you can tell he is too by his pussy squeezing you so tightly. who knows that he's a squirter too? you didn't had the time to properly react before he squirted all over your cock. you quickly came inside him after that, the sight of him losing his composure is so hot for you and you didn't know why. he went limp in your arms after both of you came, your arms wrapped around his waist, hugging him close
you slowly pull out of him, cum dripping out from his pussy "fuck" you whispered to yourself after seeing the sight infront of you,, too bad that you had to control yourself as he already passed out.
you definitely want to get assigned with him again in the future ♡
~ short fics lol
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girlokwhatever · 6 months ago
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based on a request where reader meets kate’s family!
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⊹ ࣪ ˖✩°。🦦*ੈ✩‧₊˚-‘๑ meet the martins,,
kate martin x fem!reader
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you were beyond nervous. today was the fateful day where you were meeting kate’s parents for the first time. you knew they’d be welcoming considering how amazing their daughter was, but you didn’t know if you’d be able to impress them enough.
kate asked you to be her girlfriend six months ago. the almost unbearable time before that where you two would flirt until your heads spun was about three months long. you considered yourself the luckiest person in the world to have kate, and vice-versa.
you and kate were about to leave university to spend the weekend in her hometown, lugging your bags into the back of her car. as soon as everything was ready she started the car and drove off, deciding now would be a good time to drop a bomb on you.
“so.. babe,”
“kate..”
“i jus’ wanna let you know my siblings are gonna be there too..”
“okay.. okay. that’s nice. it’s good actually. just knock it all out at once..”
kate smiled over in your direction but you didn’t see it, facing the window as you let out a deep breath. she knows you’re unbelievably nervous because the only person you’ll know there is her, but she knows everyone will love you.
you spend the rest of the car ride trying to relax. you try meditation, deep breathing exercises, and even sleep. your girlfriend says nothing, trying to let you cope with your nerves.
when kate pulls into her childhood home’s driveway you’re sleeping, head and hair pressed gently against the side of the seat. she gently grasps your shoulder and leans in to press a kiss behind your ear, whispering that you’ve both arrived. you wake with a startled expression, disbelief written across your face.
“what?! kate! why didn’t you wake me up earlier, i’m probably a mess right now!”
you’re not mad, just panicking. you try to press your hair back down into place and smooth out your sundress but your frantic attempt doesn’t help you much.
“baby you look amazing, i swear.”
you look at her, slightly pouting at the situation. she seizes the moment, taking the opportunity to press and kiss to your lips. some of your worry slips away with her silent reassurance, feeling more confident and accepting that whatever happens, happens.
suddenly you remember the flowers you bought for her mom, pulling away from your girlfriend to grab them from the backseat. kate said these were her favorites so of course you had to buy some.
“are you ready?”
you nod, feeling some of your anxiety resurfacing. you’re not sure why it was so nerve wracking for you. there have been times in the past when you met your partner’s parents and it never made you feel this way. maybe because kate is the best thing is the best thing that ever happened to you and you never want to lose her.
as soon as kate knocks the door swings open, revealing both of her parents. her mom is smiling wide at you and her dad is too, beer in hand. you don’t miss the loud thudding of steps from her siblings either, both of them greeting you with similar smiles.
“okay guys, you don’t have to stand and stare like robots.” she’s joking, pulling her mom and dad in for a hug all at once. her sister kennedy pulls you inside as she introduces herself but you’ve heard so much about her from kate you feel like you’ve known her all your life.
“everyone, this is my wonderful girlfriend, please don’t suffocate her while i go get our stuff from the car.”
“oh kate, i can help you-”
her mother touches your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks in your pursuit to follow kate. “trevor can help kate, you stay here. you’re our guest!”
kate rubs her hand on your back before she departs. she’s giving you this ‘just relax’ look, so you really try. it’s not difficult to think that this is where kate grew up, baby pictures and her warm vanilla scent lingers everywhere.
once you snap back to reality, kate’s mom is looking at you so genuinely and with so much certainty you feel as though this is already your family. you feel bad watching trevor leave but he doesn’t seem to mind at all, helping ease your conscious. this house feels so familiar to you, almost as if kate embodies this space she grew up in. loving, accepting, cherishing, and sweet.
“oh! i bought these for you. kate said they were your favorite.”
you hold the flowers in her direction, watching her face light up as if she hadn’t noticed them until now. you all drift to the kitchen as she thanks you, getting out a vase to set them in. she’s bubbly, smile wide and cheeks a perfect shade of pink you recognize from kate.
they’re all so welcoming to you, patting you on the back and squeezing your shoulders every so often. their aura exudes love and positivity, spreading into your bones and helping you sink into the moment. all your worry is left behind, pure excitement taking over at the prospect of the rest of your weekend here.
a few hours later you’re all sitting outside on the back patio. you’re in kate’s arms laying on the couch, her parents sitting across you both, and trevor and kennedy in two lounge chairs.
kate places her chin on the top of your head, wanting to engulf your entire being. the sight of you laughing and making jokes with her closest family melts her heart. she admires every single second you spend just laughing at something someone said, feeling as though you were meant to be here in this moment.
you’re all mid laugh after kennedy recalls a high school basketball fail memory when her eyes widen, gasping loud and holding back a laugh.
“did kate tell you- oh my goodness. did kate tell you she used to have the most aggressive side part ever?!”
kate’s eyes widen at the exposure, face turning red when she tries covering your ears even though she already knows you’ve heard it already. your jaw goes slack because you had no idea, and think it’s absolutely hilarious.
“what?! no! i had no idea! she never said anything.”
“really kate? you’ve never shown her a high school photo?” her mom speaks through laughs, kate’s face and the reveal stuck in her mind.
“oh my god- was this a whole high school career thing?”
“yes! at least five years, i’m surprised it didn’t get stuck that way.”
everyone’s in on the conversation now and the inside joke begins to form. even with her embarrassment, kate doesn’t mind much because it’s you, joking with her family. she’d go through a million moments like this if it meant bringing you closer with the people she loves most.
through the hysteria, kate meets her mom’s eyes. the approving smile is present, a silent ‘you got a good one’ look that tells kate all she needs to know. of course she was certain her family would love you, but she didn’t know it’d be so easy, all the pieces falling into place. kate smiles back, trying to burn this memory into her mind forever.
after dark everyone’s drifting back inside and bidding trevor and kennedy goodbye. you hug them both, telling them how amazing you think they are and you’re really happy to have met them. they tell you the same, especially kennedy who sneaks in a joke about how you’re her ‘future sister.’ your heart stutters at that, the idea of being kate’s wife giving you butterflies in your stomach.
it’s when kate places her hand in yours and guides you to her bedroom that her mom really knows. with absolute confidence she knows how deeply in love her daughter is with you. she knows kate has found her soulmate from the way she’s always watching over you, making sure you’re alright. it’s mother’s intuition, she just knows.
kate hands you your towel, kissing your forehead as you exit the shower and she takes your place. you’re brushing your hair when she asks you how you feel about her family.
“i really love them kate. they’re all so sweet and funny. they really were so welcoming.”
“yeah, i can tell everyone really likes you.”
it makes you feel good to hear to say that, like it’s an official welcome into her family. and it means everything to you, knowing how much family means to kate. knowing she brought you here to see where she grew up and who she grew up with.
“i’ll be right back kate, i left my socks in your room.”
“okay! i love you!” her voice fades as you walk out, shouting out a quick ‘i love you’ back. because you really do love her, more than anything.
you’re searching through your bag when you hear a gentle knock on the open door, turning to see kate’s mom jill.
“hey! is everything okay?”
“oh yeah, everything great. i just wanted to tell you it was really amazing to meet you. you’re a wonderful girl, and i can tell kate really loves you,” her voices lowers a bit as she speaks again, “y’know, kate’s never really had a serious girlfriend, you’re the first girl she’s ever brought home. i know she’s happy with you, so thank you for being so good to her. and you’re welcomed here anytime.”
you’re at a loss for words, thankful for the praise and slightly shocked by the news that kate hasn’t ever brought a girl home. you and kate never discussed dating history in detail and it didn’t matter to you. it still doesn’t. your heart pounds and warms your body, flustered because of how well jill thinks of you.
“well, thank you for having me. i really appreciate how welcoming everyone was today, it means a lot. i really feel happy here and hopefully we’ll get to come back soon.”
her mom smiles and nods, kissing your cheek as she says goodnight to you. the whole interaction is almost surreal. your love for kate grows impossibly larger knowing that the love you two share is so easy to notice.
your girlfriend walks into her room and spots you, picking you up bridal-style before laying down in bed. you straddle her, eyes gleaming at her big silly grin. she reaches for you hands and kisses them repeatedly, closing her eyes and melting into the touch.
“i love you so much, never wanna be without you.”
“i never want to be without you either,” you’re leaning down, kissing her skin wherever you feel it. she’s warm and soft from the shower, skin smooth and perfect for leaning into.
“i want to marry you.”
“kate, don’t say those things.”
your heart pounds for what feels like the millionth time that day, not sure if she’s saying it just because of the heat of the moment. either way, you know with absolute certainty that you would want to marry her too and if she asked you’d say yes.
“why not? i mean it. i want to marry you.” and she’s not lying, she really does mean it. with the deepest parts of her soul she means it and knows it’s true. she thinks she’ll buy you and ring the second she gets back to iowa, feeling a sudden urgency to bond your love.
“i want to marry you too.”
you both stare at each other wordlessly, the only thing existing between you is the love you share. she kisses you again and again, feeling that if she doesn’t you’ll just disappear because you’re too good to be true. she holds you tighter because she fears you might vanish or realize you don’t actually want this.
but you do. you both do. you’ll always love kate even in death, wherever that may take you. you know that for certain, just as certain as kate is about her love and adoration for you.
“mrs. martin. i like that.”
“for you or me?”
“for us. i want to be with you forever, future mrs. martin.”
ੈ✩‧₊˚⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚*:・゚✧*:・゚
GUYS I REALLY LIKE THIS. i want to turn it into a little series of reader and kate’s future (wedding, kids, etc.)
WHAT DO YOU THINK
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n0n-sen-se · 1 year ago
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💌 𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐟𝐞𝐰 𝐊𝐍𝐘 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 𝐀𝐝𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐫. . .
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includes ;; genya, muichiro content ;; pure fluff. a/n ;; stresstember eh? the perfect time to indulge in some adorable escapism! (´。• ◡ •。`) ♡
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☆☆☆ # genya shinazugawa !
genya regularly receives check-ups at the Butterfly Mansion, thus you tend to bump into him a ton!
this is where things start to take a turn. . . he stops getting so angry and quick to shut you down. . . and instead, he starts watching you train a little more, keeping idle tabs on your schedule, daydreaming of you when he should be focusing on training. . .
then it hits him:
he's got a crush ?!
to this boy love literally feels lethal.
he can't function. at all. he's unable to stand or talk to you for more than a few seconds without becoming flustered and wracked with nerves.
so loving you from afar is the simplest-easiest option.
he stares a ton, and tries hard not to get caught.
daydreams when he shouldn't- and at the worst times- you can only get punched in the face while training so many times before you start to wonder if having a crush is really worth it.
i'm pretty sure anyone could see the reason this quick-tempered boy suddenly turns shy when he's around you.
and he hates admitting it. (what is he supposed to do? he's never been in love before?)
there are times when he's 100% undoubtably sure that you're busy- or far, far away from the scene of the crime. . . he'll sneak into your room (after double checking that the coast is clear, again) he'll leave a few wildflowers next to your nightstand.
just the thought that he's showing romantic affection towards you has his heart palpitating. . . even if it is, technically indirect.
has him paranoid as hell, like somehow even after all his precautions, you'll just know it was him. if you suspect him, or bring it up, he'll vehemently deny everything.
(whenever he leaves flower btw, it'll be up to a week before he works up the courage to bring another bunch, and in between he tries to garner the courage to talk to you. . . without success)
he'd actually get pretty comfortable with this scenario, and eventually saves up enough to produce a small vase to hold all the flowers.
and it feels like the biggest step yet!
its a painfully simple pot, and he feels he could do better, but he's tied a woven red string around the neck to help. . . at least a little.
you know. . . in the future he could tie notes to it. the thought has his ears burning red hot, and he flees the scene just as quickly.
☆☆☆ # muichiro tokito !
honestly, it doesn't fully occur to him that he is a secret admirer at first.
he just one day happens to notice you because you caught his eye. nothing in particular, there was just something. . . bright about your presence.
your eyes? your smile? who could really say. all he knows is that your very interesting to look at when you're around.
even your voice catches his attention, like the sound of bells to his ears. its calming and also so alluring? how are you able to charm him like this?
the couple times you caught him staring he looked away quickly, then he starts wondering why he's afraid of being caught?
that's when the idea of an idea starts to form in his head.
a crush!
honestly, i think he'd smile to himself at the thought. its all very confusing and all very new and exciting!
he'd stare a ton and try to be subtle. . . but then fail at that too. (at this point he's just standing beside a tree rather than behind it?)
muichiro gifts you things that remind him of you: things that are eye-catching and interesting to him.
. . . something that holds his attention as much as you do. . .
mostly things he's found, like the shiniest shells or rocks, broken ornaments or porcelain he's found. the best would probably be a tiny pearl he. . . acquired.
instructs his crow to deliver them to you, which in turn means you get hit in the head with said object- you don't need a more obvious clue to know that his crow hates. your. guts. (don't worry she's just a little jealous)
at first, he completely forgets that he's sent anything to you at all.
until he see's you holding them and it all connects.
silently hopes you to make the connection too. and i don't think he'd mind being caught at all. (its kind of like a fun game he's playing, that subsequently causes the faintest blush to appear across the bridge of his nose)
thinks about you maybe a bit too much, and starts to get excited at the prospect of being in love or a relationship! what would it be like to hold your hand, or even have all of your attention for once? (now he's just smiling up at the clouds like an adorable idiot)
if he writes anything (a note?) its just doodles and drawings he's done that he then hands over to his crow to deliver.
actually very fond of leaving you snacks too. . . or straight up offering to share while (innocently) asking you what ❛all those things in your hands❜ are.
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lueurjun · 1 year ago
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ੰ first kiss with enha | ꒰ heeseung , jay ꒱
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enhypen reaction—there comes a time in a lot of relationships where the next step is taken, and here’s how the nerve-racking first kiss experience went for you and your mans.
version two: jake and sunghoon.
. . . . . . . ꒰ HEESEUNG ꒱ ,,
he’s a feral boy
we’ve all seen that man flirt and hip thrust HE IS FERAL
so naturally you’d assume he’d be laid back and confident about the whole thing
but when it comes to you, he’s a pile of blushy mush that just cannot comprehend the fact that he’s even managed to bag you
in his eyes, you’re out of his league
bc you’re a gorgeous gemstone! have faith in yourself bby ur wonderful
and without realizing, you actually intimidate him a little
bc ur just so goddamn perfect
an angel if you will
so the idea of kissing you just seems… scary
because what if he doesn’t live up to your expectations and you decide to leave him?
he is terrified of disappointing you so it actually takes him a while to gain the courage
which panics you because why in the world is this man not givin u a big ol’ smooch?
does he not want to kiss you?
omg does he think your breath stinks and is revolted by you?
you’re both massively overthinking it
lil silly billys
and none of you want to bring it up because how do you approach that conversation?
like you can’t just ask him ‘oh yeah, hee, how come you don’t want to kiss me? are my lips crusty? does the idea of locking lips physically repulse you?’
anyways you’re a couple months in
and things are getting serious so he can’t be that sickened by you
and you haven’t run for the hills yet so you clearly don’t want anyone else
finally. he’s had enough
this man is tired of staring at your lips imagining them on his own
HE IS YOUR MANS HE DESERVES SOME SUGAR
to be honest at this point you’ve given up hope on him kissing you, and you’re much too nervous to make the first move
so you just kinda go with the flow
which naturally means that the last thing you were expecting when sliding your cute lil self into his car
was for him to lean over, cup your face and plant one tasty smooch on those lips of yours
you literally froze for like two seconds but once realisation settled in, you kissed that man back in milliseconds
heaven. cloud nine. neither of you wanted to pull away
unfortunately, you had no other choice
so taken aback by the sudden kiss the only thing you could think to do was share a giggle before you held up a bag full of treats for your date
gosh ur both so awkwardly adorable i can’t
“i got us snacks for the car ride! but you taste better.”
you’re so cute stop the little blush on your face after saying the cutest yet lamest thing ever
heeseung cannot resist tugging you back in for another little lip tasting sesh after that because you are the cutest thing to ever exist
he is an absolute simp for you AS HE SHOULD BE
. . . . . . . ꒰ JAY ꒱ ,,
despite being the perfect man material, he isn’t the most experienced when it comes to relationships
like he’s had a partner before, but it was never serious so the milestones just weren’t that important to him
but it’s different with you
don’t roll your eyes at me
idc if that’s cliché okay. it’s jay. you allow it. lose the ‘tude baby cakes i know you rolled your eyes
anyways:)
everything that didn’t seem so important in his last relationship suddenly seemed a thousand times more nerve wracking this time
because losing you is on the line and jay knows that he doesn’t ever want that to happen
suddenly he wants everything to be perfect because you deserve the world and nothing less
hahahahasleepingontheroadtonight
jay absolutely refuses to give you a shitty first kiss
it has to be romantic. and it has to be amazing and if you don’t like it then he will slide down the wall
clutching honey to his chest
sobbing
same tho that’s a mood
anyways yeah he wants to make sure that you get the most romantic kiss ever
meanwhile you’re not too fussed because it’s jay and no matter what, kissing him would be a dream
unless he’s like a really bad kisser but he’s perfect so he’s not
he’s taking his time to prepare everything
like he plans a candle lit dinner, rose petals, the finest food
the whole shebang
lemme be you for one day i beg
but two days before the dinner is set to take place
YES HE HAS A FULL SCHEDULE
the two of you are hanging out like normal and the vibes are immaculate
and you both want to kiss each other
the timing just seems right
but jay, the little dum dum, is fighting with himself
because does he really want all of his hardwork to go to waste?
you’re both leaning in but smoke is practically pumping from his head due to how fast his mind is racing
seconds away from those luscious lips
HE PULLS AWAY
absolute dummy
you’re hurt and embarrassed obviously
bc you just got flat out rejected and that’s just horrifying but it’s fine it happens to us all babe
and jay is panicking because well… you look like you’re going to start sobbing
“is there something wrong with me?”
the crack in your voice. the pain in your eyes. THE QUESTION ALONE
oh dear jay feels like he’s going to throw up
this is NOT how he wanted any of this to go
you start packing up your things to leave which is fair because you’re embarrassed
and jay is trying to figure out what to say or do
and then he just decides to be honest because honesty is the best policy
so you’re about to step out of the door when he gently grabs your arm
“look i’m sorry. i really really really wanted to kiss you… it’s just… i have been planning a perfect dinner for weeks so it would be perfect. i didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, i just wanted it to be perfect for you.”
i’d fold honestly
i have no shame
and neither do you apparently because you can’t help but crack a perfect little smile
“so do i have to wait for this dinner or can i kiss you now?”
BOLD
you’re an icon
jay just kinda smiles sheepishly
and then he caresses your neck and tugs you into one of the softest, most amazing kisses you have ever had
firework inducing even, toe curling, heart thumping-
sorry i’ll stop
the point is, the kiss is AMAZING
maybe you didn’t need a fancy candlelit dinner to make it perfect after all
perhaps, all you needed was each other
i’m legit sobbing someone pls send help
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orimuraa · 2 months ago
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✎ᝰ. So sweet like bubblegum - OT7
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(synopsis) ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 when you are enhypen’s tutor but they end up falling in love with you -✧
ot7 enhypen x fem!reader ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 fluff ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 mutual pining ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 reader has to tutor enha ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 tutor to lovers ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 sunghoon's has a kiss in it ˖ ִֶָ𐀔 wc 1.7k
𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂ
𝑳𝒆𝒆 𝑯𝒆𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒖𝒏𝒈 - 이희승
recently, you have been tasked by your professor to tutor lee heeseung. heeseung was your typical jock, he played football, he was tall, muscular, handsome, and was practically failing his classes. heeseung was very popular around your school so when you started tutoring him a couple months ago, people thought that you two looked really cute together. over the time, you found yourself falling more and more for heeseung's flirty nature. the truth was, heeseung actually liked you for a long time now and felt like he practically won the whole lottery when he was told that you would be his tutor. one afternoon, you received a text from heeseung, asking you to meet him in the school garden. confused, you made your way to the garden, spotting heeseung in the middle. "y/n, i don't really know how to say this so i'll just be straightforward with it. i- i really like you and i have for a really long time and i've just been too scared to say anything because i was scared you didn't feel the same way!" you found him quite cute the way he shut his eyes and just let his words spill out, in hopes that it would make sense to you. "heeseung, i like you too. i'm so glad you were able to tell me how you felt" you smiled. you will never forget the way his eyes lit up and he pulled you into the sweetest embrace, mumbling into your hair how he would never ever hurt you. man, you got so lucky with this one.
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑱𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒔𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒈 - 박종성
it wasn't like jay was a bad student, he just had been struggling in the english class a bit more than he would've liked. but when he got the news from his professor that you would be his tutor, he was beyond excited. he had been hiding a 3-year-long crush on you for forever and he felt that now was his chance to finally make his move. you two had instantly clicked during your first tutoring session and you had secretly been crushing on him for the past few weeks as you tutored him. jay couldn't just let you slip thru his fingers yet so he decided to pick up the courage to ask you out. while you were studying, you felt your phone ping on the desk next to you. looking at it, you saw it was from jay. it read: hey ynnie! i'm sorry i'm too much of a chicken to come ask you in person but, did you maybe wanna go out sometime with me? y'know as a date? lmk and we can plan! <3 maybe your love life wasn't so sad after all.
𝑺𝒊𝒎 𝑱𝒂𝒆𝒚𝒖𝒏 - 심재윤
jake wasn't exactly the brightest when it came to some of your classes, so when you started to tutor him, you began to see why he didn't fully understand the work. he was easily distracted, resembling an adorable golden retriever, and although it was hard to tutor him, you couldn't help but catch feelings for the boy. he was so sweet and kind and you smiled so much your cheeks hurt whenever you were around him. jake on the other hand, was always so nervous whenever you two had a study session because how could he ever act normal when the prettiest, sweetest girl was tutoring him? he was head over heels for you and anyone could see it. it just happened that you were a bit oblivious to things like that and completely missed the way his eyes would form into little hearts whenever you would walk by. jake always thought that you were wayyy too good for him. you were basically just a fantasy that he couldn't obtain. everyday, both you and him would fall more and more into a love spell with each other with the other not knowing anything about the feelings. so it was a bit nerve-wracking when you received a confession letter from jake, saying how in-love he was with you and how he didn't exactly have the courage to go up to you and say it to your pretty face. but in the end, it all worked out as he was able to win your heart and take you on a date (later on, dating).
𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒏 - 박성훈
park sunghoon was the school's best ice skater, but when he started to fall behind in his math class, it posed as a great threat to him. if his grades were not good enough, he wouldn't be able to participate in the competitions. therefore, he needed a tutor asap. that's where you come in. he came up to you one day, practically begging for you to tutor him since you two shared a math class, only agreeing because you had a massive slight crush on him.you had only really seen sunghoon during the ice skating competitions, but being able to enjoy his real personality up-close like this was even better. he was actually a naturally charming guy and he was so sweet with you. no one in their right mind would be able to resist his charm. sunghoon had also been slightly crushing on you since you've started tutoring him. the way you were genuine with him and didn't just want to be near him cause of who his reputation was, but for his actual personality. one session, he had abruptly stopped the lesson and turned towards you. "i think i would go crazy if i didn't say this now so y/n, i like you. i've never felt like this for anyone and i really don't want to mess this up, and it's totally fine if you don't feel the same beca-" you quickly shut him up with a kiss, just so happy to hear that your crush was mutual and not just one sided. "it's okay, i like you too" the two of you just smiling like idiots.
𝑲𝒊𝒎 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒐𝒐 - 김선우
at first, you were really shocked to hear that you would be tutoring kim sunoo because you thought he had decent grades? but nonetheless, you were excited. you actually had a massive crush in sunoo since forever but you were way too shy to go up and confess, so you were hoping to make a good impression on him. kim sunoo actually did know who you were and he would be lying if he said he didn't find you a tad bit cute. you were exactly his type and you were so so so so sweet. you two were an immediate bond at your first tutoring session and the both of you were practically made for each other. other students already thought you were dating with how close you two had become. but one late afternoon, when sunoo sits you down, telling you he had something to tell you, the last the you expected to hear was his confession to you. he expressed how much he loves being with you and how he didn't want to ruin your friendship if you didn't feel the same, he just needed to let you know. smiling at him, you let him know how head over heels you are for him too and now you two can proudly confirm whenever someone asks if you two are dating.
𝒀𝒂𝒏𝒈 𝑱𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒘𝒐𝒏 - 양정원
jungwon was the student body president so he was the obvious choice to go to when you needed some extra help in your bio class. he was so sweet about it and totally understood your situation, and agreed to tutoring you. the first month was amazing as you could already see an improvement in your grade! but you also noticed how your heart would start beating 10x faster when jungwon was around you. you admired his stunning face so often that you could draw it with your eyes closed. what you didn't know was that jungwon was also feeling the same way about you as you were him. it made him slightly nervous due to the fact that he had never felt this way before. after consulting his friends, he mustered up some courage to buy some flowers and ask you out on a date, old fashioned style. when you opened your door, you definitely did not expect to see jungwon there with a bouquet of your favorite flowers. "oh! uhh i prepared what i was gonna say but i think i just forgot it all. whatever, i'll just say it. i like you y/n and it's okay with you, i was wondering if you wanted to go on a date?...with me?" he asked nervously. it was safe to say that it was the best date you have ever been on.
𝑵𝒊𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒖𝒓𝒂 𝑹𝒊𝒌𝒊 - 西村 力
we all know that ni-ki is not a school person whatsoever. so it isn't a shocker when the professor tells him he has a new tutor waiting for him in the library. you had no idea that you were gonna be tutoring your middle-school crush and to be honest, it made you want to dig a hole and cry in it. ni-ki made you nervous whenever he was around so you had no idea how you were gonna tutor him for the rest of the semester. he was such a flirt with you and it definitely did not help your crush on him at all. ni-ki had also been going through a bit of a crisis because why was he suddenly feeling butterflies in his stomach whenever he would see you? what spell did you cast on him? your tutoring sessions had just convinced ni-ki further that he had fallen into you game of love because he could not focus on the work anymore, preferring to study you flawless face instead. one evening, ni-ki and you were having a late session when he suddenly looked at you. "what? do i have something on my face?" you asked, confused. "uhh n-no i just- i- ugh. i like you y/n. all of these tutoring sessions have made me realize that and i just needed to get it off my chest." he sighed, looking away and you swear you saw a dust of pink on his cheeks. "aww ni-ki..." you smile. "don't tell anyone, but i think i have a crush on you too," you whisper. thank god for these tutoring sessions, cause now nishimura riki has the most perfect girl in the world.
𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂ
i'm sorry this one came out so late >.< i promise to try and post them a little earlier next time! tysm to @kpislby for the wonderful inspo for the fic!! reblogs and feedback are highly appreciated! <3
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seongclb · 11 months ago
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BIRTHDAY CALL ! park sunghoon
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PAIRING. classmate!hoon x classmate!reader
WARNINGS. none that i’m aware of :)
WORD COUNT. 1117
N. happy birthday to the loml, my handsome boy with the prettiest dimples ever! idk what this is btw i wanted to make it an smau??? we shall see
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“hello?” as soon as the almost melodic sound of sunghoons voice echoed through your bedroom from your phone on speaker, you began to deeply regret letting your friends convince you to prank call sunghoon.
to be fair, at the time their words of convincing seemed extremely plausible; there was a slim chance of sunghoon realising that it was you speaking, since you were on no caller id and the times that he’d actually held a conversation with you was little.
it wasn’t that you didn’t want to, it was just far too nerve wracking. who wouldn’t be nervous to talk to a man with a face like that?
sure, you had loads of mutual friends and there were many opportunities to speak to him but the fear of blabbering like a buffoon in front of sunghoon was scarier than anything you’d imagine. so, this was your only chance of having some fun with the guy. it was harmless, and a great way to end your night with a smile on your face after hearing his voice.
that being said, you should have just stopped after hearing him say “hello?”
but, nope. that definitely was not what happened following.
shakily, you scramble to unmute the call and frantically look at your friends sitting around you, “i heard you’re good at math!”
your friends furrow their eyebrows at you, mouthing words of a frenzy since this was far from what was rehearsed. originally, the plan was to say a silly joke about his football jersey and tell him how good looking he was. but, clearly your mind had ideas of their own.
sunghoon chuckles into the phone, and the noise of him closing a door is evident, “yeah, i’d say i am. why?”
there wasn’t a single thought behind your next actions, “oh, well this might be easy to understand then! are you math? because i can’t understand my feelings around you.”
your friends facepalm, throwing their heads into your nearby pillows to muffle their sounds of dismay upon quite possibly the cheesiest thing they’ve ever heard.
sunghoon booms with laughter, almost in disbelief, and you can hear the smile plastered on his lips as he says, “i’m pretty sure anyone would understand that pick up line, even if they weren’t good at math.”
“you’re right,” you bite your lip, feeling your stomach churn as the call goes silent for a moment.
“i have to say,” sunghoon exhales, “i expected better from you, y/n.”
“huh?” you gasp, your breathing rates growing faster with each passing second.
again, the sounds of sunghoon rummaging around in his room are coursing through your ears; if the sounds of his movements weren’t clear enough before, they certainly were right now due to your immense fear upon him realising it was you who had decided to call him the evening before a lesson with him. the room suddenly reeked of your desperation to hear his voice, which was the mere reason for you calling him in the first place.
“i’m pretty sure this is you, y/n,” sunghoon lightly laughs into the phone. “make sure you do your biology notes for tomorrows lesson.”
and with that, the phone call cuts. the phone slips out of your hand as all colour in your skin seeps out of your body.
fingers white and slippery from how hard you’re clutching your books that sweat begins to form, making your hands clammy. your eyes clamp shut as you step into the biology classroom, looking down at the floor in order to not make eye contact with the oh, so beautiful boy who sits on the desk a mere five feet away from you.
although you focus on everything else in the room, his eyes boring into you is the only thing you can notice and feel. clearing your throat, you slip into your seat and frantically open your textbooks, reciting a silent prayer begging for the lesson to go by faster than ever. as you focus on the suddenly jumbled words on your textbook, you can hear people greeting sunghoon and wishing him a happy birthday.
“thanks, man,” sunghoon smiles up at one of his friends.
“are you doing anything for your birthday?” his friend asks, also taking a seat since class was about to start.
sunghoon takes a breath, and you can feel his eyes on you once again, “maybe? we’ll see.”
the bell chimes beautifully, announcing that it was okay to run out of the classroom. victory could only last so long with the sweet taste of it being ripped away from you seconds after escaping the suffocating class room, you felt a hand on your backpack pull you to another direction.
looking over your shoulder, you saw a smirking sunghoon standing over you with a hand tightly grasped around the strap of your backpack.
“aren’t you going to wish me a happy birthday?” sunghoon smiles warmly, towering over you as he stands with his hands in his pockets.
“oh, happy birthday,” you say, swiftly despite my throat feeling dry from the anxiety of having him standing so close, knowing what you had done the previous evening.
sunghoon laughs, just like he had done the night before. you watch his dimples appear in his cheeks as his nose scrunches up and his eyes curl into the cutest crescents you’ve ever seen.
“what’s so funny?” you gulp, adjusting your backpack.
“you. you’re funny,” sunghoon breathes out. “was my phone call your birthday gift to me?”
after the phone call, your friends had decided that feigning innocence was the best option, “i’ve no idea what you’re talking about.”
sunghoon rolls his eyes, “don’t try it. i know how your voice sounds. i’ve been in your class for three years.”
you frown, “was it that obvious?”
sunghoon chuckles, “yes! just because we don’t talk that often doesn’t mean i wouldn’t know! i’m not that slow.”
“but, still,” you mutter, somewhat disappointed. yet, there was something so heartwarming about knowing how sunghoon recognised your voice. perhaps all that participating in schools and presentations had been worth the embarrassment, since sunghoon could now easily distinguish your voice.
sunghoons still staring at you with a kind smile, “you know what would make my birthday even better that it already has been?”
you shake your head as sunghoon takes a step closer.
“go out with me,” sunghoon asks, raising one of his perfectly carved eyebrows.
“as if i’d say no,” you reciprocate his the wide grin across his cheeks. “only because it’s a birthday gift.”
with a bite of your lip, hoping he realises your attempt at making a smooth joke. by the amused expression painted over his face, sunghoon definitely has.
“that’s the only reason?” he ponders, acting disappointed. “what a shame. i thought you were interested in me.”
you straighten up, “what would happen if i was?”
“then, i’d ask you for your number. so you don’t get any more random ideas to prank call me instead of asking me out like a normal person,” sunghoon looks down at you with twinkling eyes.
you roll your eyes, “give me your phone.”
“gladly,” sunghoon beams.
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oozedninjas · 11 months ago
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What do you think of possessive turtles with their s/o? What do you think they'de be like? Other than marking their s/o that is
Ninja turtles + possessiveness
Ah, the smell of toxic relationships!
18+ I Ninja guys are mind to late twenties I kind of dark!turtles, kind of what I think the toxic aspects of dating them would actually be like. I MDNI I General verses
Leo
This bitch is too cocky to even think you can cheat on him, or fall for someone else. Yet!! He's still a mutant turtle, what if you hang out too much with someone who changes your mind?
You haven't answered in half an hour? Calls you.
Oh, you don't answer? haha, funny
* proceeds to spam*
via text, via calls, via social media
He just has this controlling habit of wanting to know where you are, with whom, and what you're doing.
You hate it, but when you confront him about it, he's always like
:( What do you mean? I'm just worried!
The foot clan's out there, you know?
Passive aggressive, honestly
It's not that he's being possessive! he just wants to make sure you're safe. *coughs * gaslighting * coughs*
He's sore when it doesn't work.
Donatello
Yeah, I don't how to tell you this but, your phone is tapped.
Just as you are about to leave to hang out with your friends, he makes the century's discoverment. It's happening again — "Please stay; it's important!"
Just five more minutes! *263536 hours later he still isn't done showing you *
Tracks your phone (in case of an emergency, of course)
Scoffs at you when you point out he's being possessive
Raphael
Behold, the "I can take you there" man.
Do you need to go to the store? He drives you! Get on the motorbike, enjoy the city lights ;)
You're hanging out with your friends? Don't worry; he'll give you a lift! No? Why not? Hmm, are you really hanging out with your friends?
Well, if he can't take you there, he can pick you up. How's that? :D Really so annoying.
Oh, you're clubbing? Guess what?! He's patrolling just in that same area. Isn't that great? Now he can wait for you to finish and walk you home!
Stalks your Instagram stories knowing he'll probably get angry, and then confronts you about the most random screenshots. Why are you touching this friend on the shoulder in this pic?! >:(
Seriously nerve-wracking.
Mikey
Listen, listen, we gotta give Mikey all the coins!! All the points because he's so subtle you don't even notice he's being possessive until one day you're reflecting and * loud gasp * revelation.
He gives you a bracelet just like his own so you can wear it as a couple! In addition to many other things that are sometimes bought and sometimes handmade, the point is that they are all orange.
And you will say, how is that possessive?
BECAUSE, because, your friends ask, is orange your favorite color? And while it may be yes, it is an opportunity to mention that the color reminds you of your boyfriend.
In short, he gives you or does things that will force you to bring him into conversation with other people.
He is the first to comment on all your photos on social media, "How beautiful my angel!" which is a problem bc now your friends want to meet him * sweats * how the hell are you gonna explain? And what if someone in your group reveals the secret? * anxiety intensifies *
Everyone in your life knows that you have a boyfriend, which is not bad, but sometimes, Instead of his actions feeling genuine, it's more like he just wants everyone to know that you are taken.
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adore-laur · 1 year ago
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HOME IS A FEELING
— former high school sweethearts reunite for a conversation about what went wrong 🌃
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——
"Don't turn around." 
The vague statement thrown your way sends speculations trickling through your brain. Those three words usually never mean anything good. What is it? Or who is it? Whatever the mystery, it makes you anxious based on your friend's wary expression.
"Just tell me," you say timidly, becoming tense in the diner booth with a forkful of red velvet cake halfway to your mouth. "Tell me so I don't have the urge to actually turn around." 
"Your ex," she mutters, never one to beat around the bush, much to your appreciation. "He just walked in. Don't kill me for saying this, but he looks really good." 
You kick her foot under the table and sink further into the leather seat. "Why is he here? He's supposed to be in another country." 
It's not an exaggeration or a falsity. Harry is supposed to be in not only another country but also another continent entirely—the Netherlands, to be exact.
Your friend risks another glance at the front door. "Well, he's back, and it's like he never left. Look at them..." She shakes her head slowly. "Hyping him up like he's a goddamn hero." 
You assume she means the people you went to high school with. A hometown get-together with a small crowd of classmates from nearby colleges is being held at everyone's favorite local retro-style diner to celebrate the last week of summer break. It was going swell until Mr. Marine Biologist, who probably makes studying abroad his whole personality, waltzed through the door. 
You cradle your left cheek with your hand to create a shield for your face in case he happens to look over. "I'm almost done with my cake, and then we can leave." 
"Good luck," she sings. "The only booth open is the one right behind us." 
Of course. Sighing, you silently pray that Harry won't come near you. You doubt he'll try to talk to you anyway since it's been complete radio silence on both ends for over two years. You're really hoping the breakup doesn't get brought up. 
A sudden and forceful compulsion tells you to catch a quick glimpse to see how he looks, what he wears nowadays, and how he acts when you're not around. It's hard to resist. 
"He's coming this way," alerts your friend through a spoonful of vanilla ice cream. 
The universe must be listening, and you can't combat the urge anymore. Someone as beautiful as him begs to be looked at. You sure as hell didn't break up with him because he was unattractive. 
Subtly peeking to your left, you see Harry in person for the first time in what seems like forever. It's only a short window of time where you can take in his presence as he walks closer to sit with a group of people in the booth behind you. 
Black skinny jeans. Nothing has changed there. 
Chelsea boots. Since when does he wear those? 
A gray, tattered sweater, and a blue beanie. It's summer, for crying out loud.
Most surprising, however, is his hair, which now falls just a tad below his jaw. The same soft curls you would run your fingers through until he fell asleep. 
You continue picking at your dessert, your mind running a mile a minute at the sight of him. The fact that he's behind you—thankfully facing the other way—but still inches away nonetheless is nerve-wracking. If you move your head back even the tiniest bit, it'll touch his own. 
Did he notice you? Does he know his ex-girlfriend is in the same room and thinking about everything he could be thinking? Like how you never forgot about him as much as you tried to? 
He's speaking, but you can't piece together what he's saying because you're too distracted by how his voice has deepened over the years. The rasp and British drawl are still there, and the warmth and comfort of them still make your heart race.
Your friend keeps stealing glances and looking at you with apprehensive eyes that cause prickles of anxiety on your skin. "What?" you whisper.
Before she can reply, you feel something nudge the back of your neck. You strain your peripheral vision and see Harry's elbow resting on the top of your booth. 
"Oops, sorry," he says, twisting around in his seat. 
You automatically turn and look at him. It's impossible not to, since he's like a human magnet for the eyes. His face is so close to yours now. Have his eyes gotten greener? Why does he have such beautiful lashes? Does he have more freckles on his nose since you saw him last? 
Snap out of it! 
"It's fine," you mumble, shaking your head and quickly turning around. Your heart feels like it's in your throat. 
After finishing the rest of your dessert, you lean forward so he doesn't accidentally bump you again. Your friend raises her eyebrows at you and taps her foot against yours. 
"So, your brother is coming to visit soon?" you ask, ignoring her questioning look and attempting to make any sort of conversation to distract from Harry. 
"Yeah, tomorrow. My mom is going to weep happy tears."
"Aw. Remind me to visit her before the semester starts." 
The leather seat suddenly squeaks behind you, and your breathing goes uneven for the third time tonight. 
"You guys want anything to drink?" Harry asks his group of friends. 
They all tell him their desired orders, and shortly after, you see him walk past your booth. He heads toward the counter with long strides and hands he doesn't know what to do with. His back is turned, so you use your chance to shamelessly observe him. He looks different but is familiar all the same. He has the same body, although he looks buff. Same friendly personality, although you've missed out on it lately. Same gentle presence, although it wasn't that way the night you separated. 
"Didn't you once tell me that he always ordered ginger ale at restaurants?" 
You look at your friend, processing her question. "Yes. He never mixed it with anything, either. Just drank it straight up like a freak." 
"Gross," she says with a wince. "I think he just ordered one." 
Once again, the counter is your focal point; this time, you notice the glass of creamy yellow liquid on it. You internally gag at how Harry could still drink that. Harry then walks back to his booth, skillfully carrying two glasses in each of his hands, like he worked as a waiter in his past life. You don't even try to hide the fact that you're staring. 
Eventually, he catches your eye and abruptly stops in his tracks. You watch him blink a couple times before he continues to the table and sets down the drinks for everyone. 
"I'll grab some napkins," he murmurs, leaving again. 
You slide your empty plate toward the center of the table and watch him fumble while taking out napkins from the dispenser. Why is he so nervous all of a sudden? 
When he walks by for the second time, he jerks his chin up to the ceiling. You furrow your eyebrows in response. 
He nonchalantly repeats the gesture as he starts passing napkins around. You shake your head, nonverbally telling him that you have no clue what he's conveying. 
His jaw clenches before he mouths, "Come with me." 
"Absolutely not," you mouth back as you fiddle with the sugar packets. 
Harry huffs and sits in his seat. 
Everything used to be so easy with him. 
—— 
Two Years Ago
It was graduation day, and you were inserting a silver hoop earring in the pierced hole of your earlobe when three thumps gently rattled your bedroom door. 
"Knock knock." 
In the reflection of your vanity mirror, you grinned giddily. "Come in! It's unlocked." 
Harry opened the door with a pout on his lips. "You're supposed to say who's there." 
"Wha—" you stammered confusedly, turning around in your chair. "I hate you." 
He shuffled inside and immediately bellyflopped onto your bed. "Wow. I missed you too." 
"Just kidding," you said, flashing him a winning smile. "You left your laptop charger here, by the way. I set it on the kitchen table." 
"Thank you, baby," he mumbled into your pillow. 
"Don't fall asleep."
"Mm, c'mere." He lazily patted the space next to him. "Let's cuddle before we have to sit far away from each other for the rest of the night." 
"It'll only be for a couple of hours at most," you replied, putting in your other earring. "Don't be so dramatic."
After tidying your vanity area, you stood and slinked into bed with Harry. The lavender-colored sunset filtered through your sheer curtains and created a serene ambiance. Harry's body rolled over on top of yours, his weight providing the perfect amount of warmth and comfort. The scent of his almond oil shampoo reduced your nerves. You reached for your phone and set an alarm for fifteen minutes from now so he would have enough time to get ready, then pulled the blanket over both of your heads, not caring if the hair you spent precious time on became tousled. It would mostly be hidden under the immensely unflattering graduation cap anyway. 
Harry's clean-shaven cheek rested on your chest, and he planted a chaste kiss on your collarbone. He had always been the affectionate type. Touch was his love language, and he never failed to fulfill it with you. 
Every touch strengthened your love for him. Every touch left you longing for more. Every touch felt purposeful. 
—— 
You swear he's doing it on purpose. You know he is. 
Harry keeps leaning his head back until it faintly touches yours. Nuzzling it, if you will. That, or he'll clasp his hands behind his head and loosely twirl a strand of your hair. 
This time, he pretends to yawn and stretch his arms before tickling behind your ear. He knows goddamn well it's the place where you're the most ticklish. You pretend to have an itch and bring your hands back to slap his burning touch away, but of course, he takes the opportunity to be a pest and capture your fingers. 
You yank them away and clear your throat. "I need to go to the bathroom," you tell your friend before getting up and making a beeline straight to the back of the diner. 
When you open the door, you sigh relievedly when you find all the stalls open and no one is lingering. You pace toward the farthest wall and rub your hands down your face. Two years without Harry, and not a single call or text—only the occasional picture you'd see of him when you caved and scrolled through his social media during particularly lonely nights. Yet tonight, he acts like you're best buds who can tease each other and initiate playful touches, like you didn't end on a terrible note that made both of your hearts shatter into smithereens. Maybe this is some bizarre dream you'll wake up from and laugh about later. 
You blow out a sharp breath and wash your hands before splashing cold water onto your heated cheeks. 
"Were my hands dirty or something?" 
Your whole body flinches. Now, he's just plain annoying. How long has he been standing there? 
"Why are you in here?" you ask monotonously. 
Footsteps come closer. You keep your back turned. 
He laughs softly and says, "How've you been?" 
Such a master at avoiding questions. "That wasn't what I asked." 
"That wasn't an answer," he replies smugly. You can practically hear the satisfied smile in his voice. 
"I've been fantastic, Harry," you say, your words laced with petty sarcasm. "What about you?" 
"You sound stressed." He's right next to you now. "Is it because of your job? I heard you're an assistant teacher at the middle school." 
Your hands grip the edge of the marble sink. "Who told you that?" 
"I knew you'd be here," he says, as if it were obvious. "I had to ask people what you've been up to since you clearly weren't going to tell me yourself." 
He asked about you. No, that can't be right. Turning to face him, you let your guard down just a little. "I'm helping with the summer school program." 
Harry smiles. If you analyze it enough, it almost looks like a proud one. "That's amazing. What grade do you want to teach in the future?" 
A conversation with your ex-boyfriend about career aspirations is entirely too casual for your liking. Doesn't he have friends to catch up with? Some ginger ale to drink? 
You shrug and truthfully say, "I haven't decided yet. It's a big decision." 
He nods, crossing his arms. "You've got time." 
Silence hangs except for the drip of the faucet. 
"So... I assume you're still studying marine biology?" you ask, already knowing the answer. 
He hums an affirmation. "I'm almost done with my bachelor's degree, and then I'll be on my way to becoming one with the ocean." 
You almost let a laugh slip out. "Well, I'm sure it's beautiful in Europe. I can't imagine the view every day." 
He nonchalantly plucks a stray strand of hair off your sleeve, making your blood rush. "It is, yeah. It gets a little lonely sometimes, but it's been nice to live somewhere so different from what I was used to." 
"You don't have a roommate?"
"Nope, just me. I don't really like sharing my space." 
Only if it was with you. He's told you that before. Not that it matters now.
"I know. I don't know why I even asked." 
It's a bold statement but a tenuous breakthrough in the barrier of the inevitable and awkward breakup conversation you're dreading. 
Harry inhales and takes a step closer. "Come up to the rooftop with me. I don't want our first conversation in two years to be in the women's restroom." 
You give him an apologetic look and say, "I'm sorry, but I can't. I have to head home soon and get up early for work tomorrow." 
He toys with the bottom of your shirt. "Please." 
It's a soft whisper that echos in the empty space, a begging tone chipping away at the walls built around your heart, paired with pleading eyes so clear and tender. Harmless.
"Okay." You'll kick yourself later for giving in so easily. "Okay, fine. Let's go." You pull out your phone and send a quick text message to your friend about where you'll be. She'll understand the weight of the situation. 
Harry walks out of the bathroom, with you following behind. He takes a sharp right toward the concealed metal stairs leading to the diner's roof. He leaves some room so the two of you can walk side by side, your clothes rustling against each other in the narrow space. The rusty door opens, and you step out onto the flat concrete. 
Little squares of light shine from the city buildings far away. They cause a strange feeling to wash over you. It can only be described as a powerful wave of hometown nostalgia, even though you never left. You wonder if it's hitting Harry as well. 
He stands by the edge and leans his forearms on the railing, glancing at you with an unreadable expression. Is it reminiscence? Yearning? Regret? All could be the reason for the melancholy shift in energy. 
"What did we do wrong?" 
—— 
Three Months After Graduation
The party turned sour out of the blue. Harry's friend hadn't just said what you think he said. It was loud, so you must have heard him wrong. Why didn't he tell you? Why did you have to find out from his drunk friend, who's not even close to him? 
Harry definitely saw your face drop because he instantly pulled you into an unoccupied bedroom upstairs. You'd been arguing for the past half hour, neither one of you inebriated funny enough, but still throwing words that were more like weapons at each other—launching arrows at the heart, shooting daggers at the eyes, and slashing swords in the Achilles heel. 
Your weak spot was him, and you were his. 
You stood your ground as you spoke your closing statement with frustrated tears. "I'm never going to see you if you're abroad, so what's the difference if I just leave now and never see you again?" 
"Will that make you happy?" He was being stubborn; you were, too. "Because obviously, I don't make you happy enough for this to continue. For us to at least try." 
He did make you happy, but anger blindly leads people to say what they don't mean, especially in cases of love. 
"Obviously not." Lies, lies, lies. "It's useless when we know it'll end badly." 
Harry released a bitter laugh. "Fine. Have it your way." 
"Fine," you repeated. 
You should have fought for him, but what would have been the use if you had known it would only hurt you in the long run? 
He roughly swung the door open and then turned around one last time. "You can come pick up your stuff at my house this weekend. I won't be home." 
The door slammed shut, and reality sank in. 
—— 
The open sign of the diner flickers below. 
"We did a lot wrong," you declare defeatedly, standing beside him. 
"True, but we were eighteen and didn't know anything about communication or how to balance adult shit." 
The conversation is heading toward a place you don't want it to go. "I really don't want to talk about our breakup, Harry. It's in the past. We've moved on." 
He shakes his head. "Why? There was no closure whatsoever. I think it'd be good to get some now that we're face-to-face." 
In the distance, you watch birds flock on the wire of a telephone pole. "Why didn't you just ignore me tonight? We've been doing fine without each other." 
He scoffs quietly and leans his body against the railing. "Really? I was homesick for months because of you. You felt like home to me; you know that. The feeling never disappeared, no matter how much I pushed it down." 
You throw your arms out. "Then why didn't you call or text me? I would've replied, Harry. I'm not that cruel." 
"I thought you hated me," he says. "I wouldn't have blamed you. I just couldn't stand having you hate me, so I thought it'd be easier not to talk to you." 
It's the classic tale of a high school mindset. You think you're doing the right thing until it slaps you across the face with the hand of cluelessness. You wonder what would've happened if Harry had reached out. Maybe you could've figured it out. 
"I didn't hate you," you admit. How could anyone hate him? "I mean, I might've thought that I hated you, but if anything, I still loved you for way too many months after." 
Harry looks like he wants to say something, but you continue. "Like you said, we were young and didn't know how to balance a relationship and our lives outside of it. Two years can really mature a person, and we both needed to do that without each other." 
He nods while stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Yeah." 
The conversation stops at a dead end. There's nothing else to say since it's a mutual understanding of what went wrong. 
The breeze picks up, and you shiver before asking, "How long are you here for?" 
He clears his throat. "I'm staying with my mother, then I have a flight back to the Netherlands in a few days. I have to go back for an ecology camp." 
"That's nice," you say. A couple of days. That knowledge causes an unwanted sinking feeling to take place in your stomach. 
"Do you…" He raises his thumb to his mouth, nervously biting his fingernail. "Can we maybe talk more before I leave?" 
It's an open opportunity, but what would it lead to? What would come of it? Would it be worth the pain? 
"What's there to talk about? You're leaving soon, and then we'll never speak again." 
You've taken logical truth more seriously over the years. You've learned that holding on to false hope is dangerous for the heart and mind.
"That won't happen," he replies with a pensive gaze. "We've grown and know how to communicate now. There's so much we've missed in each other's lives that we can talk about. I don't know where you live or the places you like to go anymore, who your friends are, or what new songs you like to listen to. It kills me." 
A shaky breath escapes you. "It doesn't matter. We're not right for each other. Call me selfish, but I don't want a relationship where we barely see each other. I'm sure that's not what you want either." 
"So, that's it?" he asks, staring at the sky. "Do you not want to give this another chance?" 
You can't imagine a more complicated question to answer, but it seems you've known the answer for a while. Gently grabbing Harry's chin and tilting his face down, you say, "Right person, wrong time. It would never work with the distance, and you know that. Deep down, we both know, as much as it hurts to admit."
"What now? Are we back to being strangers?" 
"Harry, I don't think we'll ever be strangers. I know too much about you." 
You're trying to lighten the mood, but Harry's sad eyes aren't helping at all. Instead, you focus on the stars twinkling brightly across the black sky and the single car driving by on the otherwise empty street. Every second that ticks by, he seems to move closer to you. 
"If this is the last time I see you," Harry says apprehensively, "can I hold you for a little while? Give me that, and I won't ask you for anything else." 
It'd be foolish to say no, wouldn't it? You need to feel him just as much. He's too significant of a person to let go of without saying a proper goodbye.
"You can hold me." 
And so he does it for the last time. 
Harry closes the distance and embraces you like he always used to—his cheek resting on your head and his arms completely around you, squeezing the sides of your body. He's breathing you in, like he's scared of losing you. It's just you and him standing on a rooftop and holding on to any last bit you can get of each other. 
You're tucked so far into his chest that the only thing you can hear is his heart pounding. He's warm and sentimental, and the nighttime chill makes you melt into him even more. He eases you—every laugh, every tear, every moment you share with him was brought about by the ease of being around him. 
"You still feel the same." A pang ripples in your heart because of your own words, and a sob desperately tries to crawl up your throat. 
Harry nuzzles his nose into your hair. "Yeah? You still smell the same." 
You laugh, but it's choked with sadness. "What, like shitty teen store perfume?" 
"No, you smell like home. Like when I used to go to your house for sleepovers, and you'd always light those vanilla candles." 
Another pang, this time from his vulnerable confession. "I should go," you say, deterring the conversation from any more agony. 
He doesn't argue. "Yeah, me too. I never really liked those people in there anyway." 
You smile, stepping away from his arms. "I'll walk you to your car." 
He nods, and the both of you retreat down the stairs, exiting the building through the back way to avoid any distractions. After reaching the front of the diner, you find his black Jeep sitting alone in a parking space. It's nice to know he still has it, considering it's a car with good memories, like Harry driving you to school every morning and picking up coffee. Or eating fast food outside the high school after a football game. Or nights of endless kissing and professions of love before he walked you to your doorstep.
Facing him under the moonlight tonight, it's time to officially move on. 
"Bye. It was really nice to see you." A tear unexpectedly falls from your eye. Maybe it's due to the chilly temperature, but you know better. 
Harry's face crumbles. Your composure shatters. 
"Please don't cry," he pleads, biting his lip to stop it from wobbling. However, it's too late, and both of you give in to the misery and drama of it all.
"Now we're both crying."
He rubs his eyes and leans against his car door. "God, this fuckin' sucks." 
"We'll be okay," you say weakly. "It's fine. We went two years without each other. You'll forget about me soon enough, and it'll be like this never happened." 
You're only trying to convince yourself at this point. 
"I never forgot about you. You were the first person I fell in love with. How do I move on from that?" 
His choice of words isn't something you gloss over. Is he insinuating that he hasn't moved on yet? Should you tell him you haven't either? 
Logical thinking, you mentally tell yourself. Don't say something that will make it harder to leave.
"I have to go home now." But isn't home standing right in front of you? 
"Okay," Harry says. "I guess… Good luck with everything. I hope teaching goes well for you." 
You kick away a pebble on the pavement. "Thanks. I hope you become one with the ocean." 
He laughs breathily, his dimples popping out for the first time tonight. He then inhales and gazes somewhere far away as his smile dies. When he looks back at you, he nods once before getting in his car. 
"Wait."
He freezes. "Yeah?"
Don't make it harder.
Leave. 
Don't hurt yourself. 
Yet the way he looks at you is enough to make you ignore those logical thoughts. You lean forward and kiss his cold cheek, and it's like his entire body deflates under your hesitant touch. "Thank you for making me happy during the time we had together," you say against his tear-stained skin. "I never got to tell you that."
Harry sniffles and nods, then kisses your cheek a little longer and softer.
A lasting pang. A lingering sting. A sharp twinge. 
Why? 
Because the words he whispers to you cause silent tears to fall down your face when he finally closes the door and drives away. 
You still mean so much to me. 
—— 
Opening the door to your bedroom, the silence echoes louder than usual. The small space is where memories of Harry can still be found. There's the blanket he used to lie on, the desk he would sit on to help you study, and the dresser you used to keep his shirts in to wear when you missed him. The most tragic thing is an empty photo book on the top shelf of your closet that was meant to be filled with future road trips that never got planned. Next to it are unused polaroids for dates that stopped happening. 
Piled at the bottom are a few that actually got used. A picture of Harry when the both of you went to a homecoming afterparty, and you didn't want to drink alcohol, so Harry drank orange Hi-C cartons with you to make you feel better. A picture of Harry on a floating water bouncer at the lake by your uncle's cabin when you went on summer vacation together after junior year. Your favorite picture of him is when he's turned around in the seat of the school auditorium, smiling widely. It was back in high school when nothing could separate you from him. 
The pictures remind you of a time when you were in love—not only with him but with life. They feel like home to you. 
That feeling of home seems impossible to catch now. It's like chasing a butterfly that keeps escaping from the loose grasp of your hands because you don't want to hurt it. 
Are you the hands, or are you the butterfly? 
—— 
The journal on top of Harry's suitcase mocks him. He shouldn't open it, but logical thinking has never been his strong suit. 
The first page has pressed and dried lavender taped to it from the first date he took you on. The next has your drawings in the margin from when you stole his journal while he studied. Yet most of the pages are filled with lovesick entries about you. 
January 29th 
Last night, I told her I was falling in love with her. She said no one had ever told her that before, and I couldn't believe it. How could someone not instantly fall in love the moment she walks into a room? 
Then she told me that she loved me too. I swear, I almost cried with happiness. She's the one for me. I see us being together for the long haul. 
I hope she sees the same thing. 
June 6th 
We graduated! We're finally done with high school!
When they called my name, my eyes went to hers first. She looked so proud of me. I wonder if I could convince her to rent an apartment with me instead of staying in different dorms. 
College will be strange, but we'll get through it together. I have no doubt we'll adapt and find time for each other. 
I always have time for her. 
August 2nd 
I think I'm going to tell her about the college I chose. She's not going to take it well. It's abroad, but it's the best school for marine biology. 
She wants to stay close to home, but I want to get out and travel. There's nothing hard about talking through some of our differences, right? Long-distance relationships can work if you put in the effort. We can do it. 
If this ends up biting me in the ass, you'll never hear from me again. 
Harry stopped writing in his journal after the breakup. It's almost funny, he supposes. He jinxed it in the last entry. He thought of the worst-case scenario, and it came to fruition right before him only days later. 
Blissful ignorance is what he'll call it. Two high school sweethearts who didn't know what would hit them. Foolishly in love and blinded by reality. But the thing is, it's not easy to just move on from it. Especially when he brought those damn vanilla candles from his dorm room to his mother's house so he could sleep better at night. 
So he can be reminded of home. 
It was never a place when he was with you. Home became a feeling that bloomed without warning. It took him by surprise when he found himself wanting to be around you all the time. Home was entirely, ultimately, and unconditionally you. 
Harry closes his journal and brings it with him as he heads out the door to search for a drop of that feeling in the places you used to go. 
The places he will write about until his hand aches as much as his heart. 
——
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joelscruff · 2 years ago
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need to know that i want you (joel miller x reader) 18+
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this fic is part of my soft!dom joel universe; each fic can be read as stand-alone for the most part but there is an ongoing story that can be found on my masterlist. this one takes place after "for what it's worth". summary: joel calls you his good girl for the first time. rating: 18+ explicit (minors do not interact) warnings: fem!reader, age difference (reader is in her 20s, joel is in his 50s), dom/sub dynamics (joel is dominant but not degrading or aggressive), praise kink (excessive use of 'good girl'), dirty talk, mutual masturbation, squirting, if i forgot something pls lmk word count: 3.3k ao3
"So you do actually know how to do as you're told."
About ten minutes ago he'd told you to sit in the chair by the fireplace again like you had last week, this time angled so you were looking directly at him. In a quiet murmur he'd asked you to take off your jeans and sit there in your panties until he told you what to do next. In the meantime, he'd sat back against the couch to look at you, cupping himself through his jeans and telling you softly not to move, not to touch yourself.
You'd obeyed.
You don't know how or why but his words somehow have a power over you, his orders deep and smooth, voice slightly rough around the edges with arousal. If he were anyone else you doubt you'd be so obedient. If he were anyone else you'd probably already be grinding yourself in his lap, panties discarded on the hardwood floor.
But he's not anyone else. He's Joel. Mysterious Joel who lives a few houses down from you but whom you rarely see, quiet Joel who eats his meals in the dining hall and slips out every evening before anyone notices, grumpy Joel who rolls his eyes at you when you don't listen to him.
The Joel who suddenly wants to look at you while he jerks off, which you're certainly not complaining about.
"Only when it's you who's asking," you reply, trying not to let any breathlessness or nervousness slip past your lips; you're not sure what his plan is for tonight. Last week was the first time you'd done anything like this with him so you have no idea what to expect. It's thrilling and nerve-wracking at the same time.
He rolls his eyes but you can tell he's not mad or irritated, the hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, "So if I told you to go outside and check the perimeter..."
You grimace, "Okay, there are exceptions."
He laughs then, shaking his head and giving you a sexy half smile, "You're somethin' else, aren't you?"
"Don't pretend you don't like it," you reply with a smirk.
His eyes find yours and darken slightly, "I do like it," he says quietly, almost a soft growl, "Wouldn't be sittin' here if I didn't, would I?"
Your cheeks burn, a pleased smile playing at your lips.
"What do you want to see me do for you?" you ask quietly, gauging his reaction. To your relief he smiles again, his eyes trailing down to your panties and back up to your face.
"Let me just ask you one more time... do you still want this?"
"Yes," it's probably the fifth time he's asked you in the past few hours. He'd literally started out the patrol by telling you that if you wanted to forget about what happened it would be okay, that he would forget about it too and never talk about it again. You'd been very quick to assert that you didn't - under absolutely any circumstances - want to forget about it. He'd nodded, but it hadn't stopped him from asking you again once you'd reached the top of the mountain, and a few more times throughout your patrol.
"And you want what we talked about?" he continues, voice serious but tender, "You want me to take control?"
"Yes, please," you tell him for the fifth time, "That's what I want."
He nods slowly, exhaling and leaning back further on the couch until he's in the position he wants; head back, legs open, hand on the solid length of his cock through his pants.
"Open your legs," he says quietly, eyeing you hungrily once again.
Without any hesitation you do as you're told, spreading your legs in the chair and showing him the dark and wet spot on your panties. You'd picked these ones out specifically for this occasion, arguably your sexiest pair. You haven't had a reason to wear them in probably three or four years due to their impracticality and discomfort, but those reasons hardly matter in a situation like this.
"Those are pretty," he murmurs, and you can't help but feel a rush of pride at his words. Exactly the reaction you'd been hoping for.
"Wore them for you," you reply and look down at them, eyeing the sheer white lace and the little pink bow at the front, "Wanted to look nice."
"You always look nice," he says, and you blush redder.
"Wanted my pussy to look nice," you correct yourself, and you watch him inhale sharply, hand curling firmly around the shape of his cock. He may have control but you're already learning what makes him tick, what makes him come apart.
"It does," his expression fades back into one of calmness, steadiness, "Although, I think somethin's wrong with them."
You frown, looking down at yourself and back up at him, "What?"
"There's a big stain," he says with a smirk, "Wonder what that could be from?"
You shiver at the words. You could come up with some kind of comeback to keep him on his toes like you normally would, but somehow you know that the argumentative part of you doesn't belong here. Instead, you bite your lip and look down at yourself again, eyeing the large spot on your panties you've completely soaked through with arousal.
"I'm sorry," you whisper, "I guess I got 'em all wet."
He inhales deeply and tugs his zipper down, and you can't help but hold your breath as you watch him pull his cock out of his jeans, long and thick. The image of it from last time has been etched in your mind all week but seeing it in person again is simply incomparable. It's curved slightly, straining alongside the buttons of his shirt, the head wide and plump, already wet and sticky. You feel yourself begin to salivate, gaze rooted in place as your lips unconsciously fall open.
"You got me all wet, baby," he says softly, pressing his thumb gently against the tip and smearing his own wetness down his shaft, "Look at that. That's what you do to me."
Your skin is suddenly on fire and you realize that while you may know how to tease him, how to turn him on, he ultimately has the upper hand. His words have you swallowing back a moan without even being touched.
"Lean back," he orders quietly, and you obey, shirt riding up as your back comes in contact with the plush frame of the chair, "Open your legs a bit wider for me, that's it." His eyes stay trained on the wet spot of your panties, "Wider, baby, lemme see."
You spread your legs as wide as they'll go, ankles dangling off the armrests of the chair.
"Pull those pretty panties to the side," he murmurs, "Let me see that pussy."
You bite down hard on your lip, another involuntary moan threatening to slip out. You reach down and yank the material to the left, showing him exactly where you're dripping for him. Your fingers tremble, pulling your panties taut against your thigh, waiting for him to tell you what to do next. He just keeps staring at where you're leaking, pumping his dick slowly up and down while he gets his fill. You use your other hand to open yourself slightly, fingers still trembling as you show him the inner most part of yourself.
"What do you think of it?"
"Of what?" he asks, voice low and sultry, his brown eyes looking at you with a dark desire that makes you squirm.
"My pussy," you scissor your fingers a bit more, opening yourself wider for him, "Do you like it?"
He groans, fisting his cock again, "Jesus."
"Do you?"
"I do," he murmurs, eyes still dark as his gaze trails along your aching center, staring directly at where you're open for him as he fucks himself slowly, "So wet and pretty. All for me."
"It is," you breathe, "It's all yours."
He closes his eyes and tosses his head back, still stroking himself at a steady rhythm. You can't help but feel another flush of pride at how much you're wrecking him just by sitting there.
"Take 'em off," he says, still looking at the ceiling.
You make quick work of shimmying in the chair and tugging your panties down your legs, discarding them on the floor. You lean back into the same position, legs wide and open, totally exposed.
He tilts his head back down, skin red with arousal, "Touch your clit, pretty girl."
You shiver at the pet name and do as you're told, rubbing slow circles into your most sensitive spot and keening at the sensation, biting your lip. Your middle finger teases your entrance, hole pulsing at the tiny intrusion.
"No fingers yet, baby," he says immediately, and you feel yourself pout, removing your middle finger and continuing to stimulate your clit, "I know, it's just aching to have something in there, isn't it?" he breathes, words sending goosebumps across your flesh, "So empty."
"Can you touch it?" you whisper, trying to keep your voice even, "Want you to touch me so bad, Joel."
"Not tonight," he replies, voice strained, and you want to ask him when? Next time? The time after that? "You just keep touching yourself, okay? Be a good girl for me."
The words stop you in your tracks, fingers stilling on your clit for just a second before resuming their steady circular motion, not long enough for him to notice. Your mind is suddenly running wild with thoughts, a warm and fuzzy sensation trickling from the top of your head and down your back. Good girl.
You don't know why but the words ring repeatedly in your ears for a few moments after he says them, your cunt throbbing and dripping even more. Such a simple little phrase, something he probably didn't even think much about as he said it, but your body has never reacted to two words like this. Immediately, all you want is for him to say it again.
"Where'd you go?" he asks quietly, and you bring your attention back to him quickly; he'd noticed your reaction.
"N-nowhere," you reply breathlessly.
His hand has stilled on his cock, brow furrowing as he peers at you from the couch, "Do you want to stop?" he asks.
"No," it's almost a squeak, a panicked sound that you're sure you've never made before, "No, keep going, please."
Good girl, it repeats over and over in your mind as you rub yourself, Good girl, Good girl, Good girl. Suddenly all you want is to be Joel's good girl, do whatever he tells you to do, obey his every whim. You don't know where this is coming from; you're such a stubborn and strong person, never taking shit, always standing up for yourself, so why do you suddenly want to belong to him? You feel ridiculously close to your orgasm at the very thought, slowing your movements for fear of pushing yourself over the edge.
"You're distracted," he says, bringing you back to reality again, "Did I do something?"
"I'm just..." you whimper, closing your eyes tight and feeling your skin burn, "I'm so close, Joel. This is..." you moan, releasing your clit and trailing your fingers down the soft skin of your inner thigh to center yourself, "This is too much, I'm gonna come."
"Jesus," he says, voice rough, "It doesn't take much, does it?"
You shake your head, eyes still closed, "It really doesn't, not with you."
You open your eyes to see him adjusting himself on the couch, leaning back and spreading his legs almost as wide as yours, though his thighs are constricted by his jeans. You want him to take them off but you don't say anything, wanting to keep this power dynamic the way it is, want to keep being his good girl.
"Then just keep rubbing that pretty little clit for me," he murmurs, and you swear you can see his cock throbbing in his palm, the veins running along the girth of it pulsing under his fingertips, "Show me what makes you feel good."
"You make me feel good," you whimper, prodding your clit again gently, trying not to be too rough.
"I know I do," his voice is wrecked, those familiar red splotches you love beginning to bloom on his collarbone, "But you gotta be patient, baby. Gotta be a good girl for me."
"Oh fuck," you take your fingers off your clit again and bring your hands up to your face, trying to hide the pure ecstasy you're experiencing just by hearing him say those words.
"What is it?" you hear him ask, then hear the slap of his palm against his belly as he strokes himself harder, getting turned on by your shyness, "Don't hide, baby, tell me."
You shudder, biting down hard on your lip "I really like when you say that," you bring your hands down from your face and you're sure you must look completely debauched, ridiculously close to falling apart after barely any effort on his part at all.
"Say what?" he asks, raising an eyebrow, genuinely curious, "What did I say?"
You shiver as you quietly whisper, "Good girl."
His brows unfurl, recognition appearing on his face as he exhales heavily and breathes, "Yeah? You like me callin' you a good girl?"
"Yes," you whine, "Oh my god, say it again please."
He smirks, glad to be in on your little secret, "Good girl," he breathes, "That's my good girl, my special and pretty girl, so wet and swollen for me."
Oh fuck.
"More," you whimper, "More, please."
"You really want me dead, don't you?" it's almost a laugh, shaky and broken.
"No, I just want you to keep calling me a good girl," you should be embarrassed at the very notion, but those pesky emotions don't exist in this space with him.
"You're a good girl," he groans, fisting himself roughly with barely any hesitation, "You're such a good girl for me, doin' exactly what I say, showin' me that pretty little pussy, touchin' it just the way you like," he groans then and you know he's close, just needs another push, "Shove two fingers in, baby. Get that pussy all full for me."
With a gasp of relief you push your middle and index fingers inside your throbbing hole, breath hitching at the sudden fullness. You squirm in the chair, keeping your eyes on Joel as he pumps himself over the edge.
"That's it," he growls, tossing his head back, "Oh, Christ, that's it. Good girl, baby, good girl." You watch as thick ropes of come begin to spurt from the fat head of his cock, making a mess against the fabric of his shirt yet again.
You moan loudly at the sight and he looks at you, eyes bleary and half-open, lips parted and brows furrowed as he continues to pump himself through his orgasm, "Come, pretty girl," he groans, voice broken and husky, "Drench that fucking chair for me like a good girl."
You press your thumb to your clit and let out a strangled sound, a mix of a cry and a moan, letting your body ride out the perfection of this moment. There's something different about this orgasm, a wild release building in your belly that you can't describe, and without meaning to you lose your balance on the chair and find yourself slipping from the cushion, landing on the floor with a hard thud. Joel looks concerned for a moment but quickly realizes he has nothing to worry about, eyes widening at what follows.
"Oh my fucking god," you whimper, and you're absolutely shocked as you find yourself squirting for the first time, something you've never done and never thought you could even do, pussy spraying a thick stream of clear liquid onto the hardwood floor. You feel your eyes roll back and your limbs go limp, spots behind your lids as you twitch and writhe under Joel's gaze.
You're vaguely aware of him saying something to you but it's just white noise in your ears, mind foggy and body like jelly as you lay there on the floor with your eyes closed. You can feel your chest rising and falling with your heavy breaths so you know he's not worried that you've passed out or something, but when he speaks again you finally open your eyes to see him standing above you.
"What?" you ask, voice faint and quiet.
"I'm gonna get a towel for you, just stay there," he says, and you notice that he's zipped his pants back up. You feel slightly disappointed that you didn't get one last look at his cock before he put it away.
"M'kay," you reply, and close your eyes again.
-
"Now that was filthy," Joel mutters a few moments later, mopping the floor with a towel as you continue to lay there still and satisfied, "Hottest fuckin' thing I've ever seen, but filthy."
You hum, smiling softly with your eyes still closed, "You know, I've never done that before."
"Really?" he sounds genuinely shocked and you open your eyes to catch his expression, looking at you in wonder, "Never?"
"Never," you reply with a cheeky grin, "And what about you? You ever called someone a good girl during sex before?"
He shakes his head, "Never."
You feel warmth rush through your body at the admission, trying not to smile too wide as you stretch your arms above your head, trying to bring your body back to reality. Joel finishes wiping the floor and stands over you once again, reaching his hand out to you. You take it, loving how strong and firm his grip is as he pulls you up from the floor.
He walks back to the couch and lays back down on it with a tired grunt, eyes on you as you pull your panties back on and peer over at him with pleased eyes.
Never. He's never called anyone a good girl but you.
"Call me that from now on," you say softly, tugging your jeans back on. He stares at you thoughtfully, nodding slowly.
"You sure?"
"Yes," you seat yourself on the end of the couch then, eyeing the wet cushion in the chair across from you, "You saying that made me squirt, Joel. I think it's safe to say I liked it." He still looks lost in thought, "You did too, right?"
He nods slowly again, "I did."
"Then that's that," you shrug, and he keeps looking at you, tilting his head slightly like he's analyzing you, "What?"
He doesn't say anything for a moment, just keeps looking at you, then shakes his head and breaks eye contact, looking at the floor, "Nothin'," he says quietly, "Let's go to sleep."
You desperately want to know what he's thinking but you know asking won't get you anywhere. He's probably the most closed off person you've ever met and you wonder if you'll ever get a proper answer from him about anything.
"Can I sleep on the couch?" you ask softly, "The chair's all wet."
You swear you see the hint of a smirk in his expression, "Yeah, 'course you can."
You lean back on your end of the couch and watch as he does the same on his end, extending his legs out along the cushions. Your legs squeeze in between his and the backrest of the couch, and you realize that this is the closest you've ever been to him. He's warm and large and safe, a guarding and protective force against your body in the quietness of the ski lodge.
"Goodnight," he says quietly, turning down the electric lantern and plunging the room into darkness.
"Goodnight," you whisper back.
You've never felt more relaxed.
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thank you for reading 💖 i hope yall liked this one, please let me know your thoughts! and here's my kofi if you'd like to leave a tip.
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yooglefics · 7 months ago
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Reveal — Part one: recording
Pairing: Yoongi x fem!reader ( camboy!yoongi x camgirl!reader ) Wordcount: 2,198 words Genre: smut. 18+. mdni. don't use fanfics as your only source of sex ed, pls. Summary: your friend convinced you to record an audio for your OF, but doing it alone is nerve-wracking so you turn to your favorite creator for help.
Includes: Mentions of selling sex content. Mentions of sexual activity ( doing things and also talking about doing things ). Implicit masturbation instructions. Masturbation ( f and m ) ( wash your hands before putting them anywhere, folks ). People filming/recording sex acts. Use of pet names? ( baby, doll ). Dirty talk. Mentions of Jungkook x fem!reader but they are just frieeends. Author's note: I started writing this with hopes of it just being alright because I wanted to write something quick but then it got longer and here we are. Hope you like it! If you do please remember to leave a comment, reblog, ask, follow and what not. Thank you for reading <3
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It's been six months since you started this side job. At first, it was a combination of curiosity and a little desperation since money was tight after your roommate and best friend decided to go back to live with her parents. You didn't complain too much about it because you didn't want her to feel bad, and besides, you actually missed having your own space. 
But lonely nights with insomnia thanks to the stress at work, let you to explore sides of the internet you had only heard about in bathroom conversations. Curiosity got the best of you and so, here you are, going through comments on your last onlyfans post.
You've been able to grow a decent-sized audience, it may be a bit small to others but it’s manageable and you like that. Some of them are people you followed before, during your investigation stage, and now became your mutuals. You truthfully see them as your friends, like Jungkook.
He was the first person with quite a big audience who followed you back and you truly believe half your followers came from his page, even though he denies it and tells you it is all your doing. He really has a way of lifting your confidence and that's why after a few months you meet in person to shoot things together, nothing too spicy, just a shoot with Calvins and denim jackets. You were surprised when he didn't suggest something more than that, but Jungkook said “You're too sweet to fuck in a first meeting, but maybe later”.
You thought he was just partially joking, although a few meetings have passed and he hasn't tried anything. To be honest, is a bit disappointing since he is so attractive, but at least he is still willing to help you with fun photoshoots in your apartment.
A comment in the picture where Jungkook’s hand is around your throat caught your eye. When you suggested it, it was funny. A silly little joke about what people thought actually happened behind the scenes and a way to hide your face from the camera.
When you saw it after, it was less funny and much hotter. Even if he wasn't applying pleasure on your neck, the muscles on his forearm were visible under the ink, the lighting and shadows reflected on the skin of your chest that wasn't covered by the cami top you were wearing that day, and your gold babygirl collar sat perfectly on top of your breast.
You couldn't be mad at the people saying they wished to be in your place. You were jealous of yourself, damn it.
That's why the comment popped out between the others, because it was jealousy of Jungkook they were talking about.
[ JustADude: “Fuck. He is the luckiest man alive if he gets to hold you and listen to all your pretty sounds.” ]
Cheeks blushing, you giggle thinking about how Jungkook hasn't done those things. But you have to admit that the idea of people being interested in hearing is a turn on. And maybe it shouldn't be a surprise considering taking pictures for others does but… could you… ?
Your phone rings, indicating a text and interrupting your thoughts.
Kookie: told you, a voice reveal would be amazing!!
You laugh at the attached image been of the comment you were just reading.
Y/n: but i'm shyyyyy
Kookie: you can just record a masturbating session Kookie: and review it and decide if you post it or not
Y/n: if i review it i’ll not post it lol
Is true. You'll get too much in your head and shy away.
Y/n: i barely go over pics before posting because of it
You remember him as if he didn't check your newest pictures for you.
Kookie: i can help too! Kookie: i mean Kookie: no pressure, ofc Kookie: but it would be SOOO HOT
Not sure if it's for the idea of recording yourself or the fact that Jungkook is encouraging you, but your pussy reacts to the words on screen and is settled. You are doing it.
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Following the suggestion of just recording a session, you prepare as usual, sitting cross-legged on your bed, laptop in front while looking for something… inspiring.
You think about maybe looking through Jungkook’s page, rewatching his last video, but at the end get too paranoid about him listening to himself in the background even if your mic is hooked up in your bra strap, as closest as it can to your mouth.
So, you think of something else. The image of a hand around your throat still fresh in your mind leads you to the page of someone whose hands you've been thinking about in many other sessions. SugaD.
A few taps on your keyboard and his page is flashing on your screen, those exact veiny hands greeting you on his last post.
“Oh, well… here goes nothing.” 
Embracing yourself, you turn on your mic, giving a few taps to make sure it’s working, “hi,” a nervous giggle echoes your room, suddenly making you aware of the silence and glad you'll have noise beside your own.
Inspecting better Suga's post, you realize is an announcement for his last video, and the line “for all those asking for more hand porn, i got you ;)” feels like is calling you out, but you can start feeling the need between your legs so there's just so much shame and fucks to give left.
A few more clicks and the video is on full screen, starting with an empty black leather chair and then Suga coming into frame and sitting down. His face is not visible as in any other video, but following the movements of his hand, you realize his neck is. Pale skin in contrast with black t-shirt.
“This angle is kinda…” he trails off, soft laugh at the end.
“Hot,” you complete, confident Jungkook will, after laughing at you, delete it from the final audio. 
“You can't tell me I'm mean anymore. I'm spoiling you,” Suga continues in the video, “I'm giving you this view and I'm giving you what's probably the thing you all ask the most for: hands.”
And there they are. His goddamn hands. Close frame and adorned with silver rings in a few fingers. And when he turns them around you can admire how veiny and manly they are.
“I hate him. I'm gonna sue him,” you murmur, because in the month you have been following him, something you've come to find out is that Suga always knows what he is doing. He knows that jiggling his fingers and making the accessories click, paint a picture on people's minds. He knows how to dirty talk without making it cringe. And, more than anything, knows how to tease and keep his audience on their toes. 
You turn the volume down a bit more to make sure it really isn’t audible through your mic.
“Are you sitting, doll? Imagine you're on my lap right now,” he pats his tights and finally you move, positioning yourself on your knees as if you were, as he suggested, straddling him.
“That view would be amazing. You right here,” he pretends to hold someone by their hips in front of him and yours play pretend on your own body, moving them up and down as he does. “Maybe I'd tease you first, play with your tits, your nipples first. Why don't you do that, baby? Touch yourself for me.”
Letting out a groan is your way to express frustration against the fabric covering your chest, unable to remove your bra so the mic stays in the right place. Controlling your breath, you focus on the video again. Suga is playing with himself, hand against his chest just like yours, “How does it feel?” 
“I want you to touch me,” you whisper. And clearly, you know he is not able to hear you, and you're scared you'd sound like an idiot at the end, but you figure this is your chance to experiment being a bit vocal. After all, this whole thing is supposed to be a voice reveal, not just moans. 
Although, it's quite difficult not to do it with the sight on screen. “Look what you do to me,” he complains, voice raspy and hand traveling south to the bulge on his joggers.
“Are you hard?” You cringe at that one. Shaking your head to not let it get to much on your head and sending everything to the trash. Breathing, your right hand mirrors his actions and travels down your body. 
He gropes himself with a groan and you moan just at the sound. Imagine a smirk on his face as you cup yourself through your underwear. The lace is so thin is impossible to hide the fact you're already so wet. 
Another moan and you debate on skipping a few seconds on the video since you need him to do something. Give you anything.
But he is a teaser. 
He strokes through layers of fabric even when his own noises let it be known is torture for him. “I wonder…” he breathes, “how much clothes do you have? Are you dressed like I am, or are you completely naked?” His hips thrust up, into his hand and he pulls it away. “Would you come by just grinding on my cock?”
“F-fuck,” you moan when he intentionally bucks his hips upward, veins on his hands popping up when he holds into the chair. You hate him, you really do. Because he is holding back and you just want to see him.
“Please, please,” and as if it were even possible he hears you, he takes his dick in one hand and out of his pants.
You moan in appreciation and finally allow your hand to sneak into your panties too. The much desired contact makes your legs feel like jelly for a second and you have to sit back on your heels while the guy on screen keeps driving you insane.
His hand moves up and down his length, thumb collecting precum at the tip and using it as lubricant, but when that is not enough, his hand disappears off the frame, up to his face. The sound is enough to help with the imagination and quickly he is back in business.
Your eyes are fixed on every movement, every sound. Your hand matches his speed and you don't know what is hotter, the wet skin sounds or the bracelet on his wrist? Because the silver chain moves as fast or even faster and makes a sound of its own. Ah, it is so impossible for you not to imagine what it would be to look at it from your perspective. If the fingers in your pusy were his.
You push into yourself, your breath caught at the sensation before adding another one, “ooh… oh.” 
Can't master more than a few sounds, your mouth dry, it has been open since he uncovered himself. Oh, what would you do to have him in your mouth at least once. 
“The things I'd do to you.” The recording continues, “And I bet you would let me, no questions asked, right?”
“S-so good,” your knees dig into your bed and you're glad you follow Jungkook's advice of protecting your duvet with a towel. “It feels so good, oh god.” 
“Are you using your fingers? A toy? Would you like my dick instead?” He laughs breathlessly, “I would like to feel your pussy too. F-fuck, I'd fuck you so good, baby. Don’t you think so?”
“Uh uh,” short moans leave your lips, the palm of your hand rubbing on your clit before going back to back and forth motions. Fingering yourself and your eyes close as you enjoy the pleasure, and let more noises flow.
When you open them again Suga on screen has his other hand around his neck, head tilted back. Is not choking him, but you assume he is into that. “Oh… f-fu… pleasee,” he is going to be the end of you. How can you not imagine being on top of him, riding him, your hand on his throat or maybe his on yours. “I'm… oh, I'm…” a loud moan interrupts your announcement as you cum practically riding your hand. 
There's silence. Well, your breathing is fast and the mic most likely will pick it up, but you try to compose yourself for a few seconds while looking at the blank screen that indicates Suga finished too. He never shows it on camera and the only indication he did is the aftermath, this time, on his black t-shirt when he says his “you did great, kitten” to sign off.
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The next day Jungkook sends you the audio archive as promised. And is up on your page as fast as possible, it doesn't matter if it doesn't get attraction for a few hours because it's too early on the day, but if you think about it too much, you'd scratch the whole idea.
But not a minute passes and you have notifications of a new follower and a comment.
[ SugaD now follows you ] [ SugaD: the cutest. ]
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➪ Part two. | ➪ Part three. | ➪ Updates for this verse | ➪ Ko-fi
➪ Main masterlist. | ➪ Updates in general | ➪ Request & chats ♡
Edit: i forgoooot! If you want to be tagged on part 2 or future projects let me know <3
Edit 2: I made a post with different options for tag lists in case anyone is interested. You know, for future projects and stuff. But don't feel preassure to request it, and thank you for following this mini series.
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hannieehaee · 6 months ago
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MAIN THING (teaser)
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18+ / mdi
summary: after years of insistence from soonyoung, he finally convinces resident social butterfly seungkwan to introduce him to his unrequited crush; a fellow idol at hybe who he has not been able to take his eyes off since moving to the company.
content: idol!hoshi x hybeidol!reader, simp!hoshi, he's down horribly bad, seungkwan is fed up with hoshi, afab reader, smut, oral (m receiving), penetrative sex, etc.
(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)
wc: 746 (teaser); 11k (full fic)
RELEASE DATE: june 14th
or you can check it out on my ko-fi or patreon today by subscribing to either one!
a/n: time for more horrendously down bad hoshi
masterlist
"Just introduce me to her. Please," whined Soonyoung for the nth time that week.
"I already said no! Just go talk to her yourself like a normal person," rebutted Seungkwan, attempting but failing at disregarding his insistent friend.
"He can't do that. Last time they made eye contact he ran to hide behind Mingyu," snickered Jeonghan, invested in this conversation whenever it was brought up.
"I just need you to get the ball rolling. Please, Kwan-ah," he pleaded as he got up in Seungkwan's personal space – a thing everyone knew not to do.
Rolling his eyes, he sighed, "She already knows who you are, you know. There's no need to introduce you," he muttered under his breath.
"Wait, what. She does? Like knows knows me? Or just knows of Hoshi of Seventeen?", his eyes widened in shock, grabbing onto Seungkwan's shoulders to get his full attention.
"She knows Kwon Soonyoung, dumbass. She's one of my closest friends, why wouldn't she know of you?", he grumbled, attempting to shake off his friend.
Soonyoung sighed at the short-lived hope he had of you having maybe taken an interest to him and brought him up in conversation with Seungkwan, just to have confirmation (yet again) of you simply knowing him as Seungkwan's groupmate.
It had been two, no, three years since Soonyoung had first developed a special interest in you. Thinking back to when Pledis was first acquired by Hybe, Soonyoung still remembered the first time he saw you in person very vividly.
Instantly, he developed a crush on you from the very first glance, only falling further any time you'd cross paths in the building.
He had known of your existence before that, of course, but had never truly acknowledged his obvious crush on you until he first met you in person.
Unfortunately for Soonyoung, he was far too shy and introverted to ever actually engage in conversation with you, much less slide his way into your life the way Seungkwan so easily had – Seungkwan, who had become one of your closest friends. On the contrary, Soonyoung would actively go out of his way to avoid you, never even so much as making eye contact whenever Seungkwan would bring you around.
It was easy for him to become the mockery of the members due to this. Leave it to him to have his years-long crush become best friends with one of his best friends, leading him to your constant, nerve-wracking proximity.
At some point he decided that maybe he should break out of his shell – the shell he had created specifically to shield himself from his feelings for you. He decided that instead of avoiding you, he'd do the next best thing ... which was to ask Seungkwan to officially re-introduce you to each other.
You were blissfully unaware of Soonyoung's crush, he knew that much. Did you know of his existence? Barely, as you'd only interacted a handful of times, with those always being brief and impersonal interactions. This gave Soonyoung the perfect opportunity to start brand new with you. Except he'd need the help of his most extroverted friend, who just so happened to be your best friend.
After begging Seungkwan to please work his social butterfly magic on him, he found himself unsuccessful. Seungkwan would merely scoff and tell him to grow up, leading Soonyoung to be mocked by one of the other eleven members, and then the cycle would repeat. Currently, it was Jeonghan's turn to snicker at Soonyoung's misery, it seemed.
Taking note of Soonyoung's pouty lips and saddened demeanor, Jeonghan took pity on him and clapped his hands decisively before speaking up again.
"Okay, how about you let Hoshining here take your place in doing the TikTok challenge for maestro with Y/N? If they hit it off, then you've done your due diligence, and if not, Soonie can just go get fucked. Everybody wins," he suggested as he shrugged at Seungkwan.
Soonyoung lit up at this, choosing to completely disregard the last two sentences of his suggestion. This was more than enough for him to get the ball rolling.
Immediately joining in on the plan, he turned to Seungkwan once more, ready to beg again.
"Don't say anything," Seungkwan shushed him with a lift of his finger, opposite hand now digging into his temple in what Soonyoung hoped to simply be exaggerated annoyance, "I'll do it, just, please grant me twenty minutes of silence," he pleaded.
That worked well enough for Soonyoung.
...
you can check it out today on my ko-fi or patreon by subscribing to either one!
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lokisbiiiitch1993 · 1 year ago
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Loki x Introvert Virgin Reader
The First Time
Nsfw Headcanons
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Warning ⚠️🚨 long Ass Post 🙊🥰😍
My Au
Nsfw not for Minors 🚫🔞👎❌
You'd rather stay at home than go out Partying and meeting new People
Spending time with the few friends you have or your Family is very important to you
You never had a Boyfriend before because you feel like most Boys/ Men aren't searching for something serious, they just want casual Sex , they aren't loyal and most shouldn't be trusted
You are almost 25 and never had Sex before - so what ? You didn't meet the right one..yet ...One Day there will come someone gentle, mature, patient and understanding into your life - who will make sure to make your first Time Unforgettable - your Best Friend tried to cheer you up
One Day your Best Friend begged you to come with her to another of her Friends Party - you weren't too motivated but she annoyed you so long till you gave in
At this Party you felt like a total Loser - an Outsider like all your life - there are soo many People here - why did you have to come too ?and why did your Best Friend left you alone - you said to yourself
I need a drink ,now - you thought annoyed - without watching where you were going you bumped into someone - a Man - a very Handsome Man
I'm not invisible! You can see me ,right ? - he said with a smirk
I .... yes ... I am sorry, you mumbled coy
Don't look so frightened, Darling, join me for a Drink - he requested
You looked hesitant at him
I won't bite , I swear
After two drinks you loosened up a bit, talked more and started flirting back shyly
An hour later your Best Friend came to collect you - she didn't feel well and wanted to leave the Party
Before you left the Man gave you a Note
On the way home She bombarded you with Questions - Who was this ? About what were you talking about? What the hell happened ?
Omg where should I start ? First you left me alone? I was mad at you bumped in this Handsome, Tall ,Black Haired , Charmant Stranger - well ... actually not a Stranger he introduced himself - his Name is Loki and he gave me his Number - you said excited
You should call him or send him a Text - she said - thrilled
No ... never I can't .. and I don't want to discuss this with you
Hmm.. come on why can't you for once try something,risk something,do something - maybe he could make you happy
I ... I don't know ...
A week went by - you didn't text him or call him but you couldn't get him out of your Head
ok it's Time to be brave - risk something - do something - you tried to cheer yourself up before texting Loki - ok let's do this
Hi ,it's me " Y/N " I don't know if you still remember me? We met last week at a Party and you gave me your Number? How are you ? - omg that was nerve wracking you thought
Good morning, Darling, how could I forget you?but to be honest I already lost all hope,I thought you would never text or call me ! I am alright but my Day is starting to get better now ;)
Well ...to be honest too - I didn't want to text you because I was too nervous and scared but I also couldn't get you out of my Head
I am honored - but I already told you - you don't have to be scared, I won't bite you,little Mouse
From this moment on you were texting with Loki regularly
Two weeks later he invited you to a Date - it was very romantic - a Candle light Dinner at a nice Restaurant - afterwards he walked you home - if you expected something now , you should know I am not that kind of Girl ,I am not interested in Casual Fun - I only want something serious- you informed him
Darling, you offend me, I already figured that out a long time ago - actually i already knew it the first time I met you - I want you... serious - he confessed
Taking his Hand in yours, you looked happily at him
Outside of your Apartment - before saying Goodbye - you kissed him on his Cheek you were surprised by the softness - Loki kissed your Forehead and whispered Good Night, my Love,till next time
The next few dates were a Pic Nic in a Park, at a Coffeeshop , watching the Sunset - and you also enjoy holding Hands and kissing his Cheeks - telling each other I love you
A few weeks later you invited Loki to your Apartment to watch a Movie together - he let you decide which Film - You chose a Romance - after seeing the couple in the movie kiss all the time , you wanted to do it too - first you innocently kissed his Cheek and then kissed your way closer to his Lips - suddenly Loki grabbed the back of your Neck and pulled you closer to his Mouth - kissing you deeply - passionate - a moan escaped you- embarrassed you broke off the kiss and apologized - My Love,there's no need to express regret, it just meant you enjoyed it and I am looking forward to earn more of your delicious moans - Loki answered
Your cheeks reddened - you both spend the rest of the night cuddling
Since then you both kissed every time you met each other - one day the kiss was so heated Loki reached under your Shirt - nervous and scared of what will follow you you pushed his Hand away and took a step back - worried Loki looked at you apologetic - Darling,I am sorry,I didn't mean to scare you, I don't want to rush you
I know,I love you- you said softly hugging him - I love you too
A month passed - meanwhile you tried to prepare yourself mentally for your first time , you researched online about Sex and asked your Best Friend about it - you also tried to get over your Shyness and talked honestly with Loki about it - he suggested trying to make you get used to his touch - in your Comfort Zone - till you feel ready
you liked this Idea -so you took his Hand and guided him to your Bedroom
he kissed you and you kissed him back passionately - a moment later you took off your Shirt , Bra and Pants - only leaving your Panties on - and laying down on your Bed - he joined you shortly after - you looked at him lovingly and said - touch me , please -As you wish ,my Love - he gave you a quick kiss and touched your check , letting his Hand travel down your Neck ,to your curves and Belly - always looking into your Eyes and always watching your Reaction
Next he went up to your Breasts - caressing - carefully massaging - you started to breath heavy and moan
After that he let his hand slowly glide down to your belly, thighs - inner thighs - making you moan heavily
You started to feel nervous, excited,got Butterflies in your Belly and a tingly feeling in your Vagina - but you know you are ready because it's Loki and you trust him
Loki , I am ready for you, please touch me more ,I want you- you begged
He took your pantie off and cupped your Pussy - Loki whispered in your Ear - You are so beautiful,my Darling
He started to slide his finger up and down your labia, teasing you, running his finger around your clit - gliding his finger to your entrance - So wet already for me ,my Love - he teased
You breathed in and out harshly, moaning Loki -as he put a Finger in carefully sliding up and down - in and out - adding another finger and using his thumb to stimulate your clit
You are doing so well,he praised
After making you come and feeling an amazing sensation you never felt before you begged him for more
Loki , please I want you,all of you
A moment later he was nude before you - you looked at his big cock nervously , he tried to calm you - I will be gentle, relax for me
He kissed you deeply,lining his Cock to your Entrance and gently pushed in - you gasped in pain for a Moment before pleasure take over - you wrapped your legs around his Waist - he started to thrust in a steady rythm - you moaned out of breath - running your fingers through his Hair - caressing his Back
After a time you both orgasmed Loki pulled out and kissed his way down your Neck ,Breast , Belly to your Pussy - to clean you up with his Tongue - as he started licking -you moaned exhausted started to whining- Please,Loki stop it's too much , I am too sensitive, I can't take anymore
He stopped immediately - hugged you - holding you close - praised you
My Masterlist
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court-jobi · 13 days ago
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Phantom Spasms | Headcanons
Pro-Hero!MHA x Reader: Kirishima, Midoriya, Tamaki, Shinsou, Bakugou
Words: 3.8k
Prompt:
A telltale quiver wracks your body every now and then. Trembling: like a ghost which holds its wrenching fingers in wait to play piano on your nerves and muscles- attacking your body without warning or mercy. Once upon a time, those unsettling sensations would have been the sign of a flare-up or overextention… but now, phantom spasms merely unlock memories of pains seen and unseen. How will your hero best soothe your aches?
Warnings: desc. of injury/ body aches, language (because BK exists) HURT/COMFORT/FLUFF assorted
For my My Hero Academia Masterlist, check it out here!
A/N: Still working through some fun asks, but here's some headcanons since it's been a minute~ show weeks are crazy for me (my theatre kids get it) Happy Halloween and Happy Booping, yall!
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--Eijiro Kirishima
The first time you jumped out of your skin at work due to someone's hand landing on your back, Sero simply figured you spooked easily from behind. You made a joke right away to his teases. Then another time, you pinned whoever it was to the wall, when it happened to poor unsuspecting Mina at a party. You apologized and everyone laughed the overreaction off- sweet ‘Pinky’ included. 
But it wasn’t till it happened a third time at night -in your kitchen- with your own sweet-spirited Kirishima, that he finally became the one to learn what the reason behind your jerks stems from.
You were a little down in the face, getting some ice cream when he sleepily trudged out of bed for some water– and to find his sweetheart who’d left him cold and lonely. He found you up and tracing the bottom of your dish with your spoon, and made to come behind you with a hand to your waist– when you gasped. Flinching hard and snacking him with a grab– to root him to the spot and rear up to hit your attacker-
"OW- babe, it's just me!!" 
Your eyes widened and back stayed arched until you kind of stuttered and rubbed it with your free hand. Your gaze fell away to Kirishima’s arm- with stinging tears and guilt. You’d drop the scoop carelessly on the counter and regulate your breaths, all in hopes this could be perceived as another nervous-nelly reaction and not sign of what this actually is… something worse. 
"I-I’m sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, baby-" Kiri carefully raised a hand to brush your face into a sweet caress. Like magic, his touch soothes and your back finally eased up and let you sigh.
"No. I'm sorry. God, did I hurt you?" you straightened and rubbed at his arm yourself.
"Nah, it's fine, manly hit tho, babe!" He brushed it off until his laugh died seeing your eyes. "Hey. You ok? Is... something wrong with your back?" Kirishima smooths your hoodie’s folds back over your shoulders and down your arms to casually hold your waist."You were... rubbing it, just now."
"...happens more than I let on..." you sighed a little dejected. "Old injury, just - spasms- sometimes, when someone comes from behind me and I didnt notice." 
Kirishima’s gears worked together through the drowsiness,, "so... when Mina?"
"Yeah."
"And when Sero came in the-"
"Not as bad, but yeah," you nodded.
"Oh God, babyyyy," he lifted you and rubbed the outsides of your thighs when he sat you on the counter, shifting the ice cream remnants aside and caressing your low back. "Why didn't you say anything? I never would have teased you like that! Damn, I give you surprise hugs all the time..."
"It's not all the time!" you tried to assure him. "I usually hear you or know it's coming, and it's nice. It's really nice." 
A fond smile brings you to run a hand through his floppy hair. 
"I.... it actually feels better when I know it's you at my back. It feels... safe, y’know?"
He hummed and lifted his brows, raising his hands to your cheeks and giving you a sweet kiss. 
"Then consider me your personal koala, angel. I've got your back." The reassurance would touch you at its sweetness– till you see that he glanced down to your cleavage. "And your front, too."
"Oh hush, Kiri."
He laughed at the far more tame slap at his chest and tickled your sides to get you to join in. Once calmed down, you hugged Kirishima tight from your spot on the counter and so did he- now taking careful, soothing rubs on your back. 
"I love you so much, baby. Tell me anytime it hurts from now on, ok?"
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-- Izuku Midoriya
It was in training at Grounds A when it began storming outside, so you figured you’d stay a little longer and not fight the bad weather on the roads. If nothing else, it gives you extra time to watch him practice his new and improved shoot style. With the new suit came a learning curve, so Izuku practically lived on campus nowadays, long after his classes were over. Before he could take to the streets, he’d need to learn how to work as a hero again, merging his physical disciplines with the new tech he now wears to protect himself. 
Happy to spend any break with him and support him on his hero track, you came anytime Izuku called and asked for you to take notes. He’d call out how high he guesses he can reach, and you’d yell the actual figure back as soon as he landed; as a game of sorts to see how far he could go. 
Izuku shouted one simultaneously with a thunder crack and while you did answer, it sounded faint. He looked back through sweaty bangs and he noticed you kind of spoke it downwards to the ground- and you were rubbing at your back with an awkward reach.
"You ok?" Izuku called– you looked up suddenly and smiled to mask the quivering sensation as it died down.
"Yeah, I'm good! Go again!"
A few more rounds passed and in between kicks, the thunder cracked again. Even Izuku cringed at the sight out the window, seeing how nasty it was getting. The passing worry over ‘Kacchan’ being out in this drek came through a mutter when he bounded back to your side with a solid thud on the ground, looking to you for perhaps some reassurance– 
– at least he was seeking you out, until he realized he was the one who needed to attend to you. Izuku’s eyes went wide and he rushed to your side with a higher-pitched call of your name.
Shoulders held uncomfortably straight, you were half slumped on the railing, trying to regulate your breaths. 
Izuku huffed over to your side in a second, the flash of electric teal ebbing through his suit's grooves catching your eyes as he worried in front of you. 
"I'm really fine," you rasped, "it happens’a lot– more annoying than anything." You chuckled as it eased up and allowed you to carefully kneel to a sit. Izuku crouches by you too, easing you down slowly.
"Honey, that's not normal! What's happened? Are you ok?? " 
He is quick to start mother-henning you, cupping your cheeks… and you had to smile.
"It’s just a phantom pain," you twisted and pointed at the back "Not even really ‘painful’ anymore, even- just.. strange. Like, have you ever had a bad dream that something's poking you in the back, but nothing’s really there?"
He sweated through that strange scenario, "Uhhhhh, no? I've never had that before..."
"Well, it’s a thing. The doctor checked me out," you brushed off all the same. "Just the thunder spooked me, and it acted up. Loud noises make me jump., and everything siezes."
Izuku is still hard to settle, so you give him the speed-read through what happened to you. A rookie mistake of pushing yourself beyond your limits when you were young resulted in a (potentially) life-long bout with strengthening your core, keeping good posture… years have been spent working around the scar tissue under the surface as best as you can manage.
"Scar tissue?"
"Yeah, right... here." 
You thumbed at the spot of your tremors, 
"Surgery took care of it. There's not even a bad incision- it just..--”
-a low rumble shook the sky-
“- teases, sometimes. Under the surface."
"Oh," Izuku mumbled, noting you seemed embarrassed, “So it’s like a missing limb? Amputees will say that, I hear. Aizawa has before, too, after what he did with his leg...”
Thinking back to a darker time, you’d felt the same of yourself… when you worried whether or not you’d walk again. It has been so scary, feeling that there should have been horrible pins and debris sticking out of you with how your nerves twisted and pinched all around the site of your wound. As much as you wish it wouldn't, sometimes it feels like yesterday that you were laid up in the hospital for endless scans and tests for weeks on end.
Simply put, you agree so as to not worry him more: “In a way, yes.”
"-But it’s not hurting you?"
"Not... ‘hurt’ exactly, just feels kinda queasy."
Izuku’s powers of observation can read as overwhelming, though right now, you think it’s sweet how he’s taking in every inch of you to memory. He's running through a thousand and one solutions- you know the signs.
He got an idea. 
"Hey, well, let me rinse off and we can stay in and watch a show until this storm lets up! That way, you won’t be alone! And I'll sit at your back... I can rub it, if it helps?" His ears got a little pink as he rambled through, but you smiled up at his eyes sweetly. 
"That'd be nice~"
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-- Tamaki Amajiki
Tamaki laid curled up in his favorite spot on your chest: his long-sleeved hand rests tucked into himself while he nuzzles into your neck. It’s his favorite spot since he could hear you and feel all of you so well, but you didn't have to see his face.
He admittedly had fallen asleep there, even though a storm had started. Poor baby can sleep through almost anything as long as you're still enough (as his pillow).
But today? When your jump underneath him roused him, he suddenly went self conscious,
"mmmmmAHHH, s-sorry, I didnt- I... hey, what are..."
A moment’s delay, Tamaki noticed your pained expression as you let out shallow breaths. 
"What's wrong? Did I hurt you??"
"No, honey, no, you’re... ahh... yer’fine...." you tried to press your tummy back down and nuzzle back into bed. You were clearly preoccupied and not able to fully focus on resolving his quivering self as quickly as you normally would. 
"Y-you’re shaking..." Bridging up on an elbow off of you, Tamaki sounded concerned and a little more commanding. He could be very protective once he knew there wasn't a risk of embarrassing himself, "Tell me what hurts, love."
He laid on his side and regarded every twitch of your face as you glanced his way. For all his shrinking into himself and generally submissive nature, no one stands in your corner like Tamaki Amajiki. Now with your roles of confidence reversed, you felt ashamed not telling him sooner.
"It's just... my low back." You turned to face him, thumbing it, and he instantly touched the spot, your skin jumping at contact but settling as he palmed it. "It acts up sometimes... old injury and all."
"Do I need to take you to the nurse?"
"Oh no," you brushed off, "there's nothing she'd do anyway- it's supposed to go away on its own." Then another thunderclap brought it on again, and he tightened onto you again.
His little face dropped, feeling horrible that you were suffering all this time. After your initial recovery, physical therapies, even taking you to and from your yoga classes, Tamaki had foolishly assumed you’d made a full recovery without an ounce of lingering trouble.
 "I can't believe I didn't see this before. God, I'm a terrible boyfriend…" he mumbled into your shoulder, holding on for comfort as he tucked you under his arm so your back laid mostly on the bed again and he shielded you from on top. You cooed at his self deprivation and just petted through his hair.
"Tama-honey,” you tapped his chin to look up at you, "you're the best boyfriend I could- ever- wish for.”
And it's not a lie- never a lie when it comes to him. Had he only been in your life during your recovery from that pesky broken leg back in your teens, you're sure you would have bounced back ten times faster.
You're here now," you sunk adorably under him to make him feel bigger, "why would I ever feel anything but completely safe with you?"
His little lip quivered into a smile and he leaned to kiss your nose and cheek to which you sighed at both touches happily. "What should I do? To help, I mean?"
You keen a little at this caring attention. You rarely told him to do anything due to his fawning -and already skittishy- nature that simply wanted to be held and adored when in your company… but with how gentle he's being, this opening makes you answer him honestly. What's so wrong about giving him a reason to please you?
"Back rubs are nice~”
When you turn over gingerly and he starts to pet along your back, you wiggle your hips a touch.
“You can go under, hon. I won’t break, promi-”
“U-UNNDER?!” 
You giggle into the pillow. Simple back scratches will have to do for your shy darling.
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-- Hitoshi Shinsou
You haven't noticed much pain since you were in the hospital, post-accident. The meds they gave you were gold, and just about knocked you out within fifteen minutes of a dose. Truly all you’d wanted was to go home and ride out your recovery, but everyone on staff urged you to take the PT seriously, as it would help you in the long run. Your chief cheerleader -and drill sergeant- was none other than your partner in both heroics and love, Shinsou.
Once settled in your second story apartment, you really hedged against leaving to brave the stairs unless absolutely necessary. But even when you needed to for an appointment, Hitoshi was there, taking you by the hand to support you step by step. There to help you shower, there to help you dress until you could proudly manage on your own. But even then, you claimed you relied on his witty banter more than anything else… He’s strong in every sense of the word, and stoic where you need him to be, even now off duty. You missed heading out to fight crime with him, but ‘all in good time, sweetness’ was his anthem during your six week long ‘house arrest’.
Being home was such a happy change of pace from the white hallways of the triage floor; you were actually eager to tackle the monotony of chores again. Shinsou had encouraged you to rest, but didn’t fuss or demand it when you went piddling around the apartment. It wasn’t until you were putting dishes away that you had your first, huge flare-up.
You couldn’t even call it pain- just the most intense muscle spasm and queasiness you've ever felt that shook you from your low back up your spine. The sensation honestly scared you. The mug in question immediately retreated to the counter and you stumbled beside the fridge -balancing on the counter- your breaths fast and short as the tremors vibrated in you, 
"Hi–Hitoshi?!" You called weakly, trying not to panic.
He was there in a matter of seconds; he’d already heard the crash and was on his way to investigate. You heard him curse lightly before coming up beside and behind you, lowering your arms from their mismatched hold on whatever cabinet handles you could grab and placed both palms on the counter, 
"Let go," he prompted, and you obeyed without any coercion. When you held onto the flat surface, he took your waist in his hands to steady you. "Don't tense- breathe through it, deep breaths."
"What's happening…?" you can’t turn to look, even though you wanted to.
"It's in your back, right here?" Shinsou laid a warm palm on the queasy area, and you whimpered an affirmation. "You're ok, sweetheart. It’ll pass- it's just a spasm. It'll pass... just breathe."
You forced yourself an inhale that’s not as slow as you know he’d prefer, but Shinsou doesn’t correct you. Here he stands, rubbing your back with two expert fingers and his thumb over the bundle of nerves where your initial surgery had been. It seemed to help because breathing got easier. 
"That's it,” He whispered close to your ear, closing his eyes to pray. "You're doing good." He kissed a few spots on your shoulder as you relaxed as the minute wore on, him rubbing your back and you sinking away from the counter as your back bowed back from its arch.
"Oh my God...." you breathed.
"Better?"
You nodded. He looked up and saw the open pantry and let out a little breath. He kept a hand on your waist and put the mug up himself.
"You know things like this are why I'm here. Don't push yourself."
You soured at that, "I should be able to reach things in my own kitchen..."
"You will- just not right now." Shinsou said firmly, but in a tone that softened at the end whenever he was with you. You turned your back to the counter,
"Thanks," you breathed out, rubbing up his arm. "That was... really wierd. And kinda scary."
"The same happens in my neck from time to time. Not so much anymore. It will fade after a couple months." 
You exasperated at the sound of that time frame. Shinsou had suffered a bout of whiplash after a villain sting earlier that year, and you remembered his more subtle shudders and shivers indicating his nerves were getting back to standard operating procedure. That neurological progress took nearly half the year, just as he said.
But Shinsou knows your brand of impatience all too well. He lifted your chin to his gaze, more concern than scolding, 
"-which is why you need to take your recovery seriously. I know you wanna bounce back fast; I can help you get there. You know what to do. We want to avoid these as much as we can."
You nodded, but your chest still sunk. You know more practically that you couldn’t bother him every time it happened, yet you now fear what would happen now if he hadn't been here. He’s only off night duty for another week, so after this weekend, you’ll be managing life solo, more or less… 
But despite any lingering discomfort showing on your face, Shinsou would do anything to see it go away. He pressed a kiss to the soft edge of your eyeline and leaned his forehead to yours, rubbing your back comfortably in his hold- making your hands naturally hold back on his arms to make him stay. He brought you gaze back up, 
"Hey sunshine..." 
You opened your eyes to see his small smile. Makes him look all the more sleepy, but it’s such a soft sight, you’re happy to see it all the same.
"Do you trust me?"
You smiled back a little brighter. "I do."
"Then you should let me help you when you need it. I'm counting on you to tell me when that is. Promise?"
"I promise." You closed your eyes, just soaking in his presence. "I just want to be normal, babe."
He nuzzled noses with you, "Normal is subjective. You're healing, and that's nothing to be ashamed of."
You had to smile at his logical reasoning– takes after his mentor. So you nodded and asked if you could turn in and start up a bath, even if it was a little early in the day.
He massaged the soft skin by your ear and responded, "of course, love. Whatever you want."
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--Katsuki Bakugo
You had rare help in the kitchen most days at this hour, since Bakugou was still on some personal leave from his agency (a forced break from his pr specialist who's placed him in time-out from the public eye). Given the availability he now has should be regarded as a gift, he was there to readily help you and no doubt distract you with kisses while you worked. His teasing has carried on throughout the afternoon as he cleaned up behind you, and was working on washing up the last few dishes when you were getting out a stockpot for dinner.
Crouching a little too fast to reach it on the low shelf, the shooting queasiness had your back bowing, and breath expelling out of your lungs in a gasp not unlike ‘fear’. You flopped almost immediately to your butt and pivoted with your back to the cabinet as you let out an uncontrollable moan.
At the sound of a hushed 'ughhh not again' in your first language, Bakugo peeked from the other end of the island and couldn’t find you at first… so he leaned off to the side and found your crunched body on the floor.
With a loud curse, he dropped everything and rushed to your side, 
"What the hell happened??" Bakugou’s hands went everywhere, from your hands to your shoulder, scanning your legs and your tense face for signs of a cut or a bruise you could have made this quickly.
"Babe, I'm fine, this is normal f’me."
"THE FUCK YOU’RE FINE– you're on the DAMN FLOOR!" He went to pull you up bridal style but you stopped him suddenly,
"No, no don't!! It's just gotta pass first…"
His eyes went wide and felt panic creep down his back. Bakugou flopped criss-crossed on the floor, and ran a hand through his hair- all that’s left was to watch you helplessly, which was the last thing he wanted to do in this moment. Surely he could do something. The waiting made him angrier than ever for a split second, until he reigned in some breaths himself. Eventually, the blond just reached a hand out to rub your knee. What else was he supposed to do?
You sensed your boyfriend’s now silent concern, and sent a little weak smile his way as it started ebbing away, 
"It's already better. My back just seized up sometimes, it's just an old injury that acts up every now and again. I usually don't do ‘squatty’ movements like that- things that tax it,” -you wink a little playfully- “Rookie mistake~”
Bakugou nodded, yet just stared at your core as it leveled back to normal.
"Sorry about that. Getting older sure doesn’t help these things~" You breathed out as you sat up normally-- only to have Bakugou launch at you fast and grip you to him–
You yelped at his sudden reach but brought a hand to his back– strange, that you think you might need to soothe him instead with how hard he’s breathing– 
"Katsuki?"
"Don't scare me like that again, dummy," he croaked out, nuzzling his face into the warmth of your neck and cradling your head to him in the dearest way.
Really, you should know better by this point. He can be battered and bruised beyond recognition and won’t pay a bit of attention to himself… but when you get so much as a paper cut or a wasp’s sting, and he will nearly go ballistic to tend to you.
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