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#but we're getting there and things are slowly getting better
yuri-is-online · 2 days
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Hey I'm the original person that sent that baby terrarium ask! I thought that it became a forgotten relic lol
I love the expanding you did! I wanna add that when I first wrote that I meant it to be for human/mer couples that don't want to transform. With the new info we got I think that Yuu and Jade would wanna raise their kids on land for the first years where they're still squishy and then slowly move into the water. Going deeper as their kids age.
The aquarium is necessary to stimulate the environment of the deep waters without the danger. Once the babies are old enough, they'll be taken out of the aquarium for short periods of time (sort of like when people take their babies out to the park in strollers) the way I think these particular mer/human hybrid babies work is that they have gills but otherwise appear completely human, if they're place in water for a long amount of time they slowly start growing out their mer features (like when humans get pruney our skin changes to have better grip) and any patterns they inherit from both parents start becoming more prominent (they'll get the mer patterns from one parent and moles,freckles,etc from the human parent)
As times goes on I think Yuu and Jade alternate between land and sea. Their kids are hybrids so they should be allowed to enjoy both sides of their family, sort of like how mixed kids are raised in our world (im speaking from experience, but usually a mixed person would want to explore both heritages in their lifetime. If they don't in childhood they'll try to in adulthood) I don't think Yuu or Jade are the type of people to deprive their kids from those experiences so they settle on having a good amount of sea/land potions on hand.
When jade was a first year he'd have no idea what's in store for him at NRC, it's almost funny, like the seven are humbling him for laughing at human/mer couples he saw online lol
Oh hello dearest friend, none of my asks are ever forgotten. Tucked away in a very dusty corner screaming at me to get back to them, but not forgotten!
I agree about mer hybrids looking human but having gills. I considered bringing up the idea of them being amphibious so I am glad to see we're on the same page ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
As for the bit about these kids being mixed... that just adds a layer of tragedy to their existence. You are not from Twisted Wonderland. Your culture, your people, your history, all of the things your children might be curious about and wish to understand do not exist for them to see. Stories that you might tell them, people you might want them to meet, you can only recreate what you remember so if your memory is poor there's going to be so many questions you won't be able to answer. In a sense no matter who Yuu ends up with that will be a problem... but being part mer has got to make that worse. The babies will be alien no matter where they go. I agree they'd want to explore both land and sea as much as they could though.
Ah first year Jade... he was so naive back then. Humans are entertaining sure but to want to be one forever? Please only a fool would think such a thing could work. Good thing he likes being proven wrong. Sometimes anyway.
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spinnysocks · 4 days
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we are so back <- just answered a bunch of asks
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widevibratobitch · 1 month
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o-oh a bout of nostalgia alert
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thethingything · 7 months
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I'm absolutely determined to pay attention to all the seasonal changes and embrace them as much as possible this year and to try and romanaticise it. we've tried to do the same for the last couple of years too but I think we're getting better at it over time
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toytulini · 3 months
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i feel like the makeup standards are not necessarily going to get Worse, just. stay the Same. "raised by sephora and ulta" christ alive yall act like this shit is new. as if this hasnt been the standard to blast young girls with makeup ads and shit via magazine and tv and imposed beauty standards anyway. the only real difference is like, idk, accessibility of tutorials for how to apply it well
#toy txt post#spoken as. a no makeup bitch#altho i have also been accused by a terf of wearing a pound if makeup for wearing. visible lipstick in a selfie. and that was It#the actual Beauty Standard has largely stayed the exact fucking same of like making your skin texture as fake as possible#that was the standard back then too but it was harder to achieve /know how to do it cos there werent tutorials the same way now#also yes sephora and ulta are evil and all that but like the same amount theyve always been.#yall really acting like these imposed beauty standards being exposed to children is like a new unique tiktom thing thats never happened#before. and yall blaming instagram are no fuckin better. this has been happening The Entire God Damn Time#also theres something rubbing me about the way this is getting talked about. 'she did all thos other arbitrary bullshit except this#One Thing! the discrimination against this one thing is awful!#and like. it is. but i feel like we could address that while also maybe stepping back a tiny bit further and questioning these arbitrary#standards of professionalism too while we're at it#why does she have to have a blazer either? why do the earrings have to be understated#why do the colors have ti be bland and boring? why does he hair have to be a natural color and gender conforming ?#etc etc etc#like if we're accepting all that other shit the ppl upset about this could acknowledge she might experience similar discrimination for say#very obvious goth or punk-y makeup or anything a little too far outside the bounds of the acceptable beauty standard#everyone is pissed about 'eyeliner sharp enough to kill a man' but theyd be saying nothing if she was discriminated for fuckin#big wings and black lipstick bc well thats Obviously not professional standard makeup. okay?#if we change how we look at professional standards of dress and makeup as a whole to include Fucking Freak Bitches#then it would be a lot easier to include No Makeup in there as welllllll#idk#im a no makeup bitch with blue hair whos only ever worked in warehouses so they didnt give too much of a shit about my lack of makeup#or blue hair as long as i didnt show up in like flip flops which is a Reasonable dress code bc its got an actual fucking reason#(safety so you dont lose your goddamn toes to a box or a grate or some shit) vs it makes the office corpo bros sad#anyway idk if you have the privilege to get away with it i think you should dress weirder in the office to get them used to weirder dress#maybe instead of Suddenly going No Makeup sort of slowly lessen the amount so its not a Sudden change or smth#again: if you have the privilege and job security to get away with it#also also also: easier to get away with if you were to say. mask. js. they cant get mad at schrodingers lack of lipstick
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dandyshucks · 4 months
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me waking up at 6am this morning and immediately having the thought "maybe Guz still gets angry a lot because strong emotions are difficult if not impossible to control esp if its rooted in abuse trauma BUT he learns how to apologize, and thus - especially in the beginning - he would lash out as an automatic response but quickly realize what he's doing and apologize for it and we'd move on and be okay" like it had been beamed into my brain from some divine source.
also junebug (waves. thats literally just me.) would have to do their own hard work to learn to not automatically fawn when someone starts seeming the littlest bit potentially displeased or unhappy (because that is unhealthy for all parties involved). they'd BOTH be putting in the work to make it work !!!!!! 🎉
#i keep looking at my extremely strong fawn response and idk what to do about it#but in pkmn world if i got away from parents then I'd probably have some kind of chance at unlearning it fjfkdl#u cannot get better in the place u got sick or whatever the saying is#anyways uhhhmm i think so much about them and the ways in which they make things work even with all the trauma on both sides#by they i mean both Guz and Junebug fjdmfkl#it may not look healthy to outsiders with no knowledge of trauma but it IS genuinely healthy. it is steps to make things work!#so yeah he might yell for a minute but then he immediately apologizes and steps back and they talk it out together#anger especially is a difficult emotion to handle and if you've been physically abused i think yelling is like... pretty mild tbh DBDJLDL#i feel like sometimes a person will never be able to reach NormalTM. sometimes u do the best with what u ARE able to do#and i would be very happy to make space for his automatic anger reactions as long as he recognized it and apologized for it#and im sure it'd lessen over time as we both work through our shit bc brains do slowly rewire themselves over time and practice#and he would also be happy to make space for my (likely tiring and irritating) automatic fawn response as long as i made sure to catch it#and backtrack it and apologize and then work through whatever was coming up that triggered that response#we both are somewhat burdensome but thats okay bc we are happy to carry that burden for each other as long as we're both trying !#UMMM ANYWAYS LOL. i could ramble about trauma work and recovery and making relationships work ALLLL day sdfjkl#💜a boy and his bug🪲#💜so good at being in trouble#junebug🪲
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nexus-nebulae · 6 months
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the starving street cat headmate has discovered the smoked salmon we bought
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slippery-minghus · 6 months
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hmm. had an actual conversation with nightmare coworker today that seemed mutually productive. she apologized for saying some bullshit that hurt my feelings and i clarified that my intentions are to help not to undermine her, and we both agreed that there's no competition against each other and that it's the lack of growth in our role that's the problem. it was...productive.
and further cementing for me that it is time to begin making my Exit. i will be sending out my resume to a few places this weekend.
i'm still processing the conversation, and am struggling to place myself in where i am responsible to better my behavior. because i genuinely don't want to be an ass, even though i really don't like this lady and will jump for joy the day i never have to see her again. she stated that she knows my intentions aren't to hurt her, and that she thinks i'm very kind. i apologized for if my behavior came off as undermining her, and said that my intentions are only to better my own growth—and that i know she's trying to succeed too. i validated her feelings, and complemented the effort she is putting in.
where i'm struggling with is: am i in the wrong/causing harm and needing to change if the issue is that her feelings are incongruent with what she knows of my intentions? her feelings are her responsibility (WOW i almost typed "her feelings are my responsibility". i feel like that's a freudian slip) and she states that she knows i don't mean to hurt her. i'm going to try to be more clear in wording my intentions with her (she feels like me trying to take work off her plate is to undermine her. when really, i'm caught up and see her getting overwhelmed, and i want to help and also have something to do since i'm bored).
but i'm really struggling to look at my role in this and pass judgement on myself. i can and want to do better, and i don't think i did anything wrong, but i'm always so hesitant to say it's not my fault or i didn't do something bad. like i can't trust my judgement on that. my intentions were good, her bad feelings are ones caused by her insecurities, which she more or less has expressed to be aware that they are not true—the hurtful thing she said to me, she acknowledged was said out of hurt and not what she actually thinks. so, is it fair to say i'm not the bad guy? i'm not in the wrong? i know good intentions that still result in harm don't absolve anyone, but when the things that are clashing are insufficient communication and reactive insecurities... i'm not a monster, am i?
#well. i AM probably a monster for how much i dislike this lady#but i don't ACT on it#and i genuinely couldn't care less about her. i participate in decent human pleasantries because i am a decent human.#and at work we're stuck together#the thing that's irked me so much about this conversation is just.. her self centeredness#that she thinks everyone is out to get her. to undermine her. whatever.#bitch nobody cares about you enough one way or the other to put in that kind of effort. i sure don't#i empathize but i do not sympathize. to feel that pit that makes you feel like the worst kind of center of attention#i get it. but genuinely you are not the main character and no one is going to spend their limited time and energy to slowly attack you#you are not the cat with all the knives pointed at it#it's a terrible feeling to feel like you are! but when it influences your behavior to the point that you are making snide comments#to people who have no option not to interact with you then uh. then you're in the wrong buddy#and the people around you (who cannot easily leave! bc work!) should not have to bend over backwards to assure you#that they're not pointing knives at you. to protect themselves from your feelings making you say mean shit#like yes. i can be more clear with my intentions. i'm generally not the greatest at that. but my baseline that i want to#modify my behavior from is NOT one that a regular well adjusted person would take as anything but kind#and if a regular well adjusted person got a little offput by me volunteering to take work off their hands we would've had a very chill#3 sentence conversation about it MONTHS AGO.#i understand and respect (even if i find it annoying and overbearing) the need for me to announce my intentions like im working in a kitchen#and saying 'hot water' or 'knife' as i move around other people but we shouldn't have reached this conclusion this way#and frankly who's to fucking say me being more clear with my intentions will only feed the flames of her thinking i'm out to get her!#'i caught up on my stuff and your plate looks full. i'm bored. anything i can do to help?' could be a pointed knife for all i know!!#and if it is- and my actions still hurt her in that scenario- am i still responsible for the hurt caused??#like WHERE DOES IT FUCKING E N D ?#personal#*exhales* okay i feel better now#i just hate talking about my interactions with her bc i just want NOTHING to do with it. i want her out of my head!!#but until i process it i can't let go#and i'm still going to have to go over all of this with my shrink tomorrow#it just makes me mad how much of my time this bitch takes up. i'm not getting paid to think about work right now!!!!
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ballsballsbowls · 7 months
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Sent out a message to my housemates during my lunch break last night that read, approximately,
"I'm about as sure as I can be that this respiratory thing we all have is viral bronchitis. I would feel better knowing everyone had spent about 15 minutes in deep contemplation before bed tonight deciding if they need to call the doctor tomorrow morning ahead of the weekend."
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tyrantwombat · 1 year
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That said, as cool as the visuals are, they made the choking thing so dramatic again. I get the visual medium thing, and needing those high energy beats, but Sung Hyunjae is just so casually menacing about it in the novel and Yoojin just.
Barely registers it.
Can't be bothered.
#sctir webcomic#I think what they do in the comic is try to show what EVERYONE ELSE is/would be feeling when these things happen#like when they drew yoohyun as a literal cloud of darkness as a child#to highlight how absolutely balls-ass bonkers yoojin is when he's able to just shrug it off#and that makes sense too because in a comic format we ARE 'the other' perspective. we're third party. we're normal people on the sideline#shitting our pants when sung hyunjae decides to pull a peacock#In the novel we're so close in to yoojin's perspective we need to rely on context clues to pick up on things like this#because yoojin sure as hell isn't going to#and getting better at it as you slowly realize how unreliable yoojin is as a narrator is part of the experience#the comic has its own way of trying to approach the issue and it REALLY likes those visuals#which I understand entirely because DAMN those visuals#(I hope they keep this energy for yoohyun oh my gooooosh)#but it still misses that casual something of sung hyunjae 'easily' tugging yoojin in close with a light tone and freezing eyes#and a death grip on his neck#to which yoojin (who is LASER FOCUSED) just. *impatient parent voice* noah sit down I'm fine#yoojin mr 'if I can still talk they aren't trying very hard now are they?'#but that's the POINT he's NOT so this is just a business discussion#he's so focused and convinced he's in control here his fear resistance doesn't even pop up and that's the POINT#(I just checked though and EVEN MORE HILARIOUSLY yoojin is like 'well damn I definitely would be scared if not for fear resistance lol'#but#he never got the notification#yoojin all like 'phew sung hyunjae's a little intense right now glad I can't feel fear' and it's like. yoojin. buddy.#look at this and understand why song taewon is losing his shit about this man#and sung hyunjae just delighted watching the world's most hilariously fucked up little guy go
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t4tbedehopmar · 1 year
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WOAH
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yellowhearther0 · 2 years
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girls when they are trying their best but their best isnt good enough 😔😔
#sagittarius.txt#negative#stopped gaming and the horrors have returned#im just so fuciing pissed off. at the circumstances. in general#bc im stuck sittubg here with these shit ass feelings that no one can jack about until im either old enough to do something about it or#like. idek.#bc itsblike i cant say shit to my parents bc they wont take me seriously and lird knows i dont trust any of the adults at my fucking school#and im not going to make the handful of peiple i CAN talk to more worried about me when they already have atuff going on and they cant do#anything abt what im dealing with#but i dont even WANT to go to anyone because i dont wanna get mad at people when they tell me things i alreadybknow because i KNOW theyre#tryijg to help and they cant do much and its liek GRAH#im justvin such a shit plce bc i want to reach out but i have to do it of my own violition or else i'll just fucking shut down#im like a scared dog. in a cage. and he'll come to u if u just leave him be and let him do his own thing#but like. if im the svared little dog than everyone else is the big scary human who i slowly inch closer to and then suddenly the stick out#their hand right as im near them and then i run right back to where i was before and then we're back at square 1. does this make sense#and its litwrally no ones fault but my own#i just never know how to tell what other people are thinking so i think i project how i feel about myself onto what i thibk others rhing of#me and so i go into every potentially vulnerable conversation with my guard drawn high because im just expecting people to get sick of me#always complaining but never actually trying to better myself#idk man#im normal#i peomise
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teaboot · 8 months
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On of the less intuitive things about love, I've found, of any kind, is the importance of needing things.
I didn't realize it until recently, but I've always seen love as something requiring sacrifice, selflessness, patience, and generosity- to ask for nothing is to be the best person I can be, small and quiet and never in the way, always happy and helpful, self-sufficient and present when desired.
It's only as an adult, now, that I'm beginning to see the selfishness of wanting nothing.
I cut my friend's hair in my kitchen the other day. They wanted a trim and I had the skills, so I offered, and was genuinely excited when they stopped hesitating over "bothering me" and took me up on it. It was a peaceful afternoon, and we had tea and chatted for an hour or more.
My brother and I shared popcorn at the movies a while ago. When I came time to pay, I pulled my card out like a wild western sheriff and slapped it on the machine before he could fight me for it first. The satisfaction was delightful.
Someone called me crying on the phone the other day. Kept apologizing for disturbing me at work, talking about how they were bothering me on my lunch break. I was telling the truth when I told them that really, I was flattered and honored and relieved, knowing that if they were hurting I would know, that I didn't have to worry in silence. It felt good to hear them slowly come down, and to know that they knew it would be better soon, and to hear them laugh wetly on the other end. We're getting together for a visit next week.
It's hard to need things, if you've trained yourself not to. It's hard to want things, when you don't know how to want anymore. Trusting people is difficult, and so is relying on them, but I don't know where I'd be without the people who rely on me.
I've heard a lot of people say, "Nobody will love you unless you love yourself". I've had a lot of thoughts about it. It's not right, but it's not wrong, either, I think.
"Nobody will love you unless you love yourself"... I've always taken that to mean, "You will not be lovable until you develop a positive view of yourself as a person".
Now, I think it's sort of inside-out.
"Nobody will love you unless you love yourself"... because nobody can show their love to you in a way that you can accept until you treat yourself kindly, and learn what you need, and what you want, and how to ask for it, and then give that vulnerability away.
Love, for me, is someone I ask for a ride to the airport. Whether they end up doing this or not is irrelevant.
It's not needy, or selfish, or taking up energy. It's giving the gift of being wanted, and needed, and thought of. It's giving someone the security of being part of someone's life.
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idledreams4 · 3 months
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my mother is in a bad mood today
Great.
#Got yelled at for enjoying a fandom SHE wanted me to be part of#But she was also clearly pissed off just waking me up this morning so clearly something else happened#I'm putting the mark of Cain back on my arm later#She hadn't even noticed *that* but I'm sure she would have freaked out about it too#“you do realize that [the anti-possession tattoo] can be taken as Devil worship right??????”#Yeah. I am. It happens to supernatural fans allllll the time. Am I going to get yelled at when I actually get it tattooed too?#Or is it only a problem rn when I did it with FACEPAINT#Like it can all come off#In less than 5 minutes#And the handprint#Really?#It's OBVIOUSLY facepaint#You think people are going to look at me and assume “oh no that poor child is being abused”#Or is it more likely they look at me and go “oh they got bored and put a handprint on their shoulder”#Like seriously#Reactions like this are why I don't share anything with you mother. Have you considered that?#Last night I saw my facepaint and went “hey it'll be fun to turn myself into Dean!”#That's all#So I'm getting yelled at for daring to have a little fun and trying to be like my role model#Well.... Role model is a strong word#I idolize some things: like his confidence and stuff#I think confort character might be a better term for him#We're very similar and I simultaneously kin him and want to sleep with him XD#But I'm also very much like him in the way of deep down I just want to find someone willing to love me. No matter how broken I am#I never say this about any character ever but I think we could fix eachother#Not if we're trying#But if we just ended up together by chance and formed a nice healthy relationship I think slowly we would fix eachother#idle speaks#queenie rambles
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some-other-number · 4 months
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gonna be honest not only do I begin to not trust anyone engaging with that post like that but I don't even think y'all understood the post concerned about potential collateral damage of revolutionary action and hospitals. you sound incredibly merciless and tunnel-visioned. which makes me think you're in no position to lead a revolt yet alone a country
#redboots speaks#I don't know about y'all anymore but I don't think any hospital anywhere should be put under that sort of nightmare#it's beginning to sound like an eye for an eye and that quite frankly will just continue a cycle of violence instead of#making anything better.#are y'all also forgetting especially in your comparisons that I will not mention by name in case this accidentally gets picked up in the ta#that it's not so much the revolutionaries that will be doing the damage but the state forces that will oppose any uprising?#is the actions of the ongoing genocide not a model shared? do you think that a violent movement will not garner that response?#y'all disgust me. that you think it'd be ok to ignore concern and dismiss anyone who isn't 100% for a plan that's running headfirst#into a goddamn brick wall. not to mention how y'all seem to speedrun the jacobin terror#even though disabled people are treated like dirt you still won't allow the thought of us mattering. we're just collateral for y'all#to cast aside into the fire. any effort to not make things worse is too much for y'all to consider#also none of you know what liberal means. using that as an insult on someone that is not a liberal cheapens that as an insult#and makes you look like a chud. as y'all like to say! deeply unserious#yeah I'm pissed. there is a risk that an improperly planned revolutionary action could result in a chain reaction#and I will not be able to get my medication and I will die slowly over the course of maybe six months. I don't know.#I'm already slowly starting to die because I've had to go without it and I am in severe amounts of distress because of what's happening#and y'all don't even think it's a risk worth taking seriously! how can i trust any one of you to actually care for people like me#I'm being selfish i know but goddamn it's better than borderline eugenicist rhetoric. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.
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tsvai · 6 months
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tfw ur brain is working so well today that ur dad says 'thank you' to you and instead of 'you're welcome' like you meant to say, your mouth says 'hello'
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