#but we don't even know each others names
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Got a "Free Mom Hug" at trans pride today and yeah I absolutely started crying immediately
#the lady was so sweet though and encouraging#its insane cuz like. she made me so emotional#and I told her some very personal stuff#but we don't even know each others names#idk it's wild how connections happen like that#I had been avoiding the booth all damn day but stopped there at the very end
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I'm reading The Murderbot Diaries (Network Effect, so, spoiler alert), and man, Murderbot's relationship with ART makes me insane. It's like, you're an insufferable asshole. You're my best friend. Saying that word makes me retch. You're the only person in the universe who could possibly understand what it's like to be me. I can't possibly understand what it's like to be you. I must look like an ant to you. I've put my unconscious body in your hands and let you alter it. We both love our humans to the point of destruction. You've killed people to protect me and my friends. You only did it because you were between two jobs and bored. We watch TV shows together. I saw you have an emotional breakdown about a historical drama. You could kill me in a hundred different ways. I've brutally murdered several people to avenge you. You were ready to kill all my friends to save yours. I've brought you back from the dead. You're keeping us prisoner. I'm your only chance of saving your friends. I've lived and traveled inside your body, and you've been a passenger in my brain. We don't even know each other's real names.
#i'm only halfway through the book so no spoilers#i wanna sjsjkdjskhdjksdjhshsjsjjk bite them bite them bite them#they make me insane#ART in particular. it is so complex. so alien.#wtf goes on in that bot's processors#'have ART and Murderbot explored each other's bodies' yes. within days of knowing each other#i'm considering that Murderbot doesn't know ART's name because ART is the name MB gave it and Perihelion is the name the humans gave it#we don't know what ART calls itself#and ART has only called Murderbot 'Eden' or its hard-coded feed address#i don't think it even knows the name Murderbot#the murderbot diaries#murderbot#ART#Asshole Research Transport#perihelion#martha wells
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101 - a dummy's guide to loving and becoming human again
#it's been literally 1 day since ive started thinking about these two and i'm severely mentally ill#do they even have a ship name. i saw 'crowclock' but surely we can do better.#limbus company#yi sang lcb#dante lcb#limbus company fanart#strbylmn art#i. WAAAAHHH WAHHHH#hear me out. yi sang has self worth issues and sees himself as less than human. and he easily develops attachment to inanimate objects#dante struggles to form proper attachments because they don't know what the normal pace for forming relationships is. and they hate being#seen as less than human. so we run into this crazy ass relationship where dante likes yi sang for how human he is and yi sang likes dante#in part because of their head. so they love each other despite neither of them seeing themselves in the way the other sees them.#DOES ANYONE HEAR ME. AAAGHHHHHHHHHH#also supreme amount of gender fuckery as a result. GOD. I'VE MADE MYSELF MENTALLY ILL
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I've been picking mostly only the essential flirt options with lucanis in the romance so far (I've personally found the dynamic much more natural and mutual when you do that, more like forming a solid friendship slowly and inevitably becoming something else and less like you keep pushing on him and getting little back b/c he seemingly just gets overwhelmed and goes into freeze instead), and I think rye is a pretty hard person to read at the best of times even though he's been Down Real Bad from pretty early on and their chemistry as people is naturally really good. so the way the almost-kiss plays out in this playthrough feels a lot like it has the added layer of lucanis realizing that no but for sure rook is flirting and not just being kind or a good friend* it IS actually happening it's not just wishful/fearful thinking!!! and then uh. maybe going a bit too hard a bit too fast in all the excitement at that revelation haha
*in lucanis' defense he has seemingly literally never had a friend who wasn't his cousin-brother before, under those circumstances I suppose some confusion is extremely natural if not outright expected lmao
#meanwhile rook is kicking himself for being unprofessional b/c he WAS getting something important from spite there#and also lucanis had like. just woken up was that cool of me. should I have told him. should I have slowed that down???#watcher's duty crashing into watcher's longing blues ensues#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar#rook x lucanis#rookanis#I think I might have done something hilarious and a little wonderful to the lucanis romance#by making a rook who's even slower to romance than he is fhskjfhsa#even here I was straight up like 'oh this is a little early for this don't you think' on rye's behalf (it's not we have to be mid-game)#imagine how he'd fare in some of the other romances you'd just bowl him over. davrin might kill him#(and also they would kill each other for unrelated reasons during it but that's another matter (affectionate I love my lads))#lucanis has been squinting at rook in stolen moments ever since the café scene like '...did I imagine that vibe. surely not right.#i'm pretty sure. but am I. I do know he likes me. but DOES he like like me or is that just what I want it to be. this is very embarrassing#for everyone involved' (it is)#davrin has had both their numbers the entire time tho. and been extremely annoyed but professional about it#he knew from the moment these two chucklefucks showed up in his recruitment mission. and has been an adult about it. mostly#even when they've made it real hard ('so I'm gonna go ahead and assume you're not letting the abomination serial killer run around#just because you're transparently excruciatingly sweet on him. right. RIGHT??')#I have accidentally given lucanis a pattern of falling for people who keep covered neck to toe at all times#but like not to be a metaphor for their emotional intimacy issues or anything haha. imagine.#I'm making my own heart so tender by imagining lucanis struggling to get rye out of his (many-layered) robes during the romance scene#and both of them laughing right from the soul in relief and delight at each other b/c like 'how could I kill a god only to be bested#by nevarran fashion. also how in the maker's name do you get dressed so quickly in the mornings this is intense'#'same way one does anything else lots of practice and a can-do attitude'/'well I'll just have to put in the practice then'#and they just hug for a while. *head in my hands* yeah okay I can be normal. I can be normal about this.
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sorry sorry last time I'm talking about huskerdust tonight but does it fuck anyone else up knowing that Husk and Angel basically lived at the same time but were on opposite sides of the country. But also Husk went traveling. Like these two could have met while they were alive and wouldn't even know it. They didn't even know the other existed until they met at the hotel
Like I have. so many thoughts about this.
#hazbin hotel#Husk#Angel Dust#gods imagine how different things would have turned out for both of them if they'd met while alive#well I say that but they were deeper in their vices then than they are now so...... maybe they'd have made each other worse#or maybe they could have saved each other who knows#also just thinking about the idea of Husk and Angel meeting at a bar in New York back when they were alive#like not even knowing it was each other but having met and spent a night drinking in a bar together talking#maybe Angel was going around flirting for free drinks and Husk was waiting to board a ship to who knows where#and they're both neck deep in their own vices but Husk tries to give Angel some advice anyway (we dk if Husk's morals developed in Hell#when he lost his status or are remnants of his human life but I like to imagine he was a decent man who made a string of bad choices#we also don't know what kind of Overlord he was. for all we know the worst thing he did was bet souls so we dunno if he was cruel/immoral)#but Angel not heeding his advice bc who's gonna listen to an alcoholic amirite but he was fun to talk to and bought him drinks so#and them parting ways without even so much as learning the other's name. and all this happening just days before Angel dies#Husk doesn't even think about him again cuz he was just some dude at a bar and barely remembering bc it was ~20 years before he died#but Angel vividly remembering it bc it was one of the last memorable days leading up to his death#anyway thanks for listening to me ramble orz
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we haven't even said one word to each other but I can already envision the woman he's gonna leave me for. I think if you look up "emo baddie" on tiktok you'll see at least 50 of her
#you know the kind. sharp eyeliner. puts blush all over her cheeks and nose bridge. probably has one arm fully tattooed#I need to calm the fuck down though seriously. we don't even know each other's names
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All the most important mentor-tribute duos are a boy and a girl, except for Marcus and Sejanus… gay
#excluding brandy and arachne but they die early on#yes it’s bc strabo bought sejanus the mentorship for district 2 specifically yada yada#but still why not the girl#yes it’s for plot reasons cause marcus is extremely important to sejanus’s character for a plethora of reasons yada yada#tell me that’s not even gayer#they have the red string of fate tying them to each other#they were always meant to meet again under the worst circumstances possible#(extremely homosexual of them)#marcus left a lasting impact on sejanus when they were just children and influenced him into becoming the person he is#sejanus wouldn’t have been the same person we got to know if he had never had marcus in his life#and if they hadn’t met again the way they did#they were incredibly not normal about each other when they met again#they both died by their throats while hanging#marcus is the only tribute with a roman name to show even more that they have an unbreakable connection#their souls are spiritually connected and will always find their way back to each other#now tell me all of this isn’t even gayer!!!#you caaaaan’t#i don't caaaaare they’re gaaay idc idc#sejarcus#marcus tbosas#sejanus plinth
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A conversation I had with my sister this evening, transcribed from memory:
Vi: So Giovanni doesn't feel too strongly about gay people either way EXCEPT when it comes to either Jessie, James and Meowth, or his son, then he quickly becomes homophobic
Me: ...His son?
Vi: Silver?
Me: Who?
Vi: Silver? The Gen 2 rival?
Me: First time I'm hearing of him. All I know about Giovanni's family is that silly theory that he's Ash's father
Vi: HOW do you NOT KNOW Silver??
Me: Do you really think I'm so well versed in Pokemon lore that I'm aware of ANYTHING going on in Gen 2???
Vi: I infodump about Pokemon all the time to you!!
Me: Yeah, but NEVER about Gen 2!!! And come on, cut me some slack, it's not like you know anything about stuff I'm obsessed with
Vi: You mean the mess you made of LoK canon? I know enough about that!!
Me: Like what?
Vi: ......Is Ming-Hua still a swampbender in your AU or did that get retconned?
Me: She is
Vi: Okay good, so that, and uhhhhhhh..... Suiren and Midori are sisters and Mingzan's kids, Suiren has a thing with Kuvira, and......
Me, after some silence: Is that it?
Vi: Well it's not like there's a wiki detailing all the intricacies of your multiverse!!
Me: I did make a masterpost on tumblr about it
Vi: Seriously?
Me: Yeah, because Sydney was interested
Vi: ...Who's Sydney? I know that's not the name of your doctor friend
Me: And what's the name of my doctor friend?
Vi: Kat
Me: Oh, you actually remember
Vi: So she didn't have some kind of realization and decide to change her name?
Me: No, Sydney and I met not too long ago, she's obsessed with Wan, Raava and Vaatu–
Vi: Why do you always find friends with the nichest interests imaginable??
Me: It's a gift. Anyway, she was interested in my multiverse and I got invested in the modern AU she returned to recently after like, ten years. She even let me insert a few OCs into it!
Vi: .....Are Raava and Vaatu still giant spirit kites in the modern AU, or are they human?
Me: They're human
Vi: OH THANK GOD I was scared there'd be some kind of Lovecraftian eldritch horror thing involved. I'm struggling to imagine them as humans though
Me: Well, Raava is a perfect student and piano prodigy who started rebelling in her teens, and Vaatu is her childhood frenemy who's an overdramatic theatre kid Light Yagami kinnie. And all of them smoke weed
Vi, with a half confused, half outraged stare: ....what?
Me: An american thing, apparently? Sydney's from Ohio, they told me that pretty much everyone they know has smoked weed and done at least one other kind of drug before. They even offered to help out if I ever need to write characters using drugs or whatever
Vi, looking absolutely flabbergasted at this point: Ooooo...kayyyy, then..... and here I thought the spirit kites smoke weed because then you can make a pun that they're high as a kite
Me: ...That's dumb
Vi: And everyone smoking weed isn't?
Me: Not everyone! Suiren doesn't smoke weed!!
Vi: Whatever. And now I'm picturing them smoking in their kite forms. They can stick the blunt into that rhombic shape with the dot they have on their fronts
Me: THOSE ARE THEIR EYES
Vi: WELL HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT? And I'm pretty sure that's something you lot made up and not canon. Besides, I just finished reading The Kite Runner for school, I definitely know more about kites than you do
Me: Can we drop the high kites topic now?
Vi: K, sure. So, you have a new friend who used an unspecified number of drugs in the past. Great company you're keeping
Me: ....She also showed me her tits once
Vi, going all red in the face: SHE WHAT?????
Me: NOT LIKE THAT. SHE'S A PHOTOGRAPHER AND IT WAS ARTISTIC NUDITY
Vi: You know what? None of my business. Go indulge in your weird modern AU where the spirit kites are human and everyone smokes weed except for Suiren– hey, how does Suiren fit into this?
Me: You know how I said Vaatu is a Light Yagami kinnie? He's convinced that Wan is the L to his Light, his arch nemesis, all that. He quotes Light's monologues all the time and Suiren is his Ryuk. She watches him behaving like a freak, munches on some snack in the corner and enables him because it's fun
Vi: Ah, so she's the kind of friend who's only a friend on the surface and will bail as soon as shit starts going down? I mean, Light asked Ryuk for help exactly once and Ryuk straight up killed him
Me: No, she's actually a pretty good friend, at least when it came to letting Vaatu borrow a skirt and lipstick when he realises he's transfem
Vi: ...YOU MADE THE EVIL CHAOS SPIRIT KITE TRANSFEM???
Me: IT WASN'T MY IDEA I'm just going along with it. Turns out he never wanted to date Raava, he wanted to BE Raava. Why, is that a problem?
Vi: No, just... do you realise how nuts that sounds out of context? LoK's Book 2 antagonist has a gender crisis and realises she's transfem and the one who helps her feel gender euphoria is the daughter of LoK's Book 3 antagonists. Does that not sound INSANE to you?
Me: No?
Vi, after a long suffering sigh: And here I thought what you did to LoK couldn't get any worse... [in reference to the modern AU in general, NOT transfem Vaatu]
TL;DR: @rokurookajima somehow became the topic of conversation between my sister and me for a good 10 minutes :P
#also. hey Syd. you should know Vi confessed to me a bit later that before I said you were from Ohio she thought you were Australian#'why?'#'cause you know... the city in Australia called Sydney? I know that's now how it works but it's what came to mind'#'well are YOU Australian? your name is Victoria. that's a state in Australia too'#'I'M DONE TALKING TO YOU NOW'#(okay actually her name is spelled Viktoria but shhh who cares)#hope you don't find this weird lmao I just really wanted to share#I spent like an hour writing this out send help#and if you're wondering what the context of the OG conversation was. she was telling me about some video she watched#about whether the leaders of every evil team in Pokemon would be homophobic or not#tbh that's like.. not even that weird of a topic for us#we discuss the craziest shit sometimes. but that's just what siblings are like I suppose#either you're at each other's throats or you're talking about something completely incomprehensible#one or the other. no third option#I should stop typing up this post I'm getting low-key sick of it lmao#post over. I'm done. hope you enjoy
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Odypen definitely and equivalently adore each other BUT I weirdly can't see them as the type to actually say "I Love you".
They still definitely vocalize their love for each other but it's more so in "My Joy", and "Extraordinary Woman", "Strange Woman/Man", etc. And very cheesy lines (both say some cheesy shit in the Odyssey, and he definitely does in the Iliad as well. "Joy like a drowning sailor seeing land" bit???)
I could see "I adore you" but even then, that's probably during very specific moments but the actual "I love you"??? I just typed it just now for fic shit and... It weirdly just didn't feel right and I don't know why. 😅
Idk maybe it's kind of because I see them as over the top in ways, they love wordplay and riddles and I think they'd almost think "...That's not good enough >:( " about it??? I don't know???😂
#I wrote this last night. I'll do the asks I got later. don't worry! :D#I am the cheese god remember?😅#I think these two would try to “out-cheese” each other and whoever is left speechless first loses#“I would forget my own name before I would ever forget you” bullshit. CHEESY#And yes. “I sleep in our nest with you or outside on the dirt” stupidity >:D#I plan for Odysseus as a beggar to ask why she waits so long. As he's been gone a longer amount of time than the time they had together#(Simply asking as reassurance. He knows his answer. Calypso asked him. but what about Penelope?) but she gets mad at the#“Beggar” and pities him as he must be telling the truth about having a miserable life if he never got the chance to know such devotion#How what they have could never be sullied by#something as trivial as distance and years. How the years with him were the best in her life. Only made better by their son.#'My dear Joy made songs and poems about love a reality as that was simply the life we shared. Even separated our 'song' will always echo#no matter how long it's been. I'LL make sure it always does. And I know he's doing the same... That strange man used to say that#even if he died his corpse would drag itself back to us before he'd ever give up.'#...I'm not one for 'odyssey zombie au' but when I first heard it yeah. :'D Came up with this back then#“His eyes as hard as flint or horn-” Bullshit! The sad lil fuck is hiding sobs with coughs and telling her to keep away for fear of her#catching whatever “illness” he has. The nice thing about being disguised as old means sickly old man works.#...#I'm noticing that Odysseus has a lot of silly oneliners while I write Penelope with a shit ton of set up :'D#They are so silly and I love them so much#...I wrote a lot :'D#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus#my headcanons#odypen#yahoo!!!#sometimes I wonder if I should tag this with more things but I don't want to taint the regular tags with my bullshit :'D I KNOW I'm insane
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Happy aromantic year
God will it please please please
#i KNOW I'm cool as shit please stop#<- guy from next door keeps walking into my job and calling me pet names#WE DON'T KNOW EACH OTHER#hope you dont even so much as SEE an allo person#crow#adam fucking around
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I don't hate my job or anything, but man, being a float educator is so fucking thankless
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the great thing about reading a mediocre book is that it puts me right to sleep
#perfect bedtime activity#im halfway through the pairing and i genuinely keep falling asleep each time#only continuing for the italian sections so if something funny or interesting happens i can send it to res#the main problem is that i simply don't gaf about these characters like we know Nothing about them#and everything about their relationship is told not shown#in that way it kind of if feels like fanfic? like i'm supposed to know these characters already#'i didn't know where we ended and love began' 'love took root in me before i even knew its name' i don't know who they areeee#so the book starts with their breaking up and then they end up on the same european food tour and decide to see who can out-slut each other#like......that's it. and it's so obvious they still have feelings for each other. like what are the stakes!! it's so dull#it's fluffy in a way that makes me roll my eyes if that makes sense#like there was a chapter where they go into a bakery and the owner is panicking bc for Some reason literally all the staff couldn't show up#that day. so ofc the two characters on their own decide to step in and help her make all the pastries before opening time. huh?????#is that even possible??? PASTRIES??? two people???#i have to roll my eyes#idk it just feels so random. like i feel like that's something i would see in fanfic#so yeah this is Not Good and to me this author peaked with their debut
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one thing about me is that i’m an orestes-electra-pylades defender. if you don’t hear them being defended anymore that means i am deceased
#something something about them being linked forever#none of them being redeemable all of them being innocent#about this sister who was refused love all her life and who kept it all inside her to give it to her little brother#who loves him so much that the lines blur and we don't know if she's sister ; mother ; father ; or lover even#because who could love him more than she does ?#about this brother who grew up with nothing but rage#rage towards this man he was given to ; that man ready to sell him into slavery#rage towards his mother who got rid of him#rage even towards this father that he has to kill for despite never having known him#rage towards the gods who set up his own curse and let him suffer for a good long while#and apollo did not tell him that no holy ritual will ever truly wash all the blood from his hands#but despite all this rage has chosen to love#to love this sister that he only knew the name of#and who welcomed him with more warmth than three suns combined#who had more fight in her than him and who urged him to do them justice#that's why he did not really hesitate when he killed clytemnestra#because he had seen his sister - a princess - reduced to rags and is skin on bone#and about this friend who became the definition of devotion#who voluntarily chose to follow his friend whom he knew was damned#chose to share the burden of killing with him#and who followed him on every corner of the earth they went to#and i know those three took such gentle care of each other#i know that electra and pylades both refused to go to sleep while the other tends to orestes having his fits of delirium caused by erinyes#yes their hands are bloody#but it's the same blood that's running through their three hearts attached by a red string#and the red of blood looks a lot like the red of love#electre/oreste#classics
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not to start shit but. tell me you didn't understand princess jellyfish without telling me you didn't understand princess jellyfish
#idk idk something about the lines we draw to divide women being ultimately useless as they degrade both sides#something something bridging gaps between people with different interests#something something literal actual sisterhood and solidarity between women#i'm never one to defend tiktok i'm not even on there and it surprises me that princess jellyfish is being brought up#but like. what is this supposed to mean. to 'tiktokify' something#girlboss narrative what hello? what? you're throwing words at me and i don't know what they mean#but it's hilarious that this post comes off as something the sisterhood would have posted before all their character development#because this is a story about empowerment not through appearance- but that inner change is what beauty is made of#the development tsumiki and the other members of the sisterhood get is not that now they dress well#but that their often self-imposed isolation is not an antidote to os being ostracized in high school and having social anxiety#and that they've dehumanized other women in the process of defending themselves#and it's not that they have to change who they are of their interests but that they full accept themselves and can therefore#be comfort with who they are#and better navigate the world. and form friendships . and human connection and FUCK#like what are you talking about#sorry i know no one here follows me for princess jellyfish takes but that's what we're gonna get today#i think when you have a fandom / readership as small as pj (in the west at least) every bad take hits that much harder lmao#anyway. kuranosuke princess rights. we are all princesses. etc etc#princess jellyfish#kuragehime#screeds#screeds fR FR#txt#i didn't want to tag this person or show their name bc it ain't personal i just want to address takes like these .#“girl's girls are toxic” “not like other girls are toxic” what if we were all princesses idk. what if we loved each other
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Grandma update! My grandma likes to say I'm her mini me for various reasons, and today we found out we have the exact same but opposite name remembering issue with the same pair of names She keeps accidentally calling Zack, one of her great grandkids, Jake, and I spent like two years in high school fully convinced a guy named Jake's name was Zack
#the person behind the yarn#grandma updates#in my defense I don't think I ever referred to the guy by name in front of him#so I don't think he knew I had his name wrong??#for some reason it feels rude to me to use someone's name a lot when talking to them#but I am pretty sure that's one of those 'just me' things and not an actual social rule lol#also I didn't really think of him as Zack most of the time#I thought of him as one half of the pair of dudes who'd talk to me once or twice a week while we were all waiting for rides home#in a weird corner of the campus#because the dudes looked like a zombie and a skeleton from a movie when there's some kind of magic#keeping people who don't know about magic from seeing magic?#like. spot on. eerie. I did not think of them by their names#I thought of them as zombie dude and skeleton dude#to be honest I'm not sure they knew my name either???#why did I think the guy's name was Zack????#I don't even remember what they looked like I just remember thinking oh yeah the skeleton guy and the zombie guy#the duo. they will come stand by me and say something weird and try to one up each other and then leave
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it's incredible how much gender euphoria i get from being addressed by my chosen name. even if the person then doesn't use my preferred pronouns, the joy outweighs it. i chose this piece of my identity, it's within my control, and that's what most people know me as these days. shit rules
#i am not out to anyone except close friends bc of the environment i'm in#but my name is gender neutral and doesn't get questioned#feel free to use my name btw if u ever happened to talk to me#even if we don't know each other!#my post#lgbtq#genderqueer#bigender#trans#lgbtq+#lgbt+#lgbt#txt
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