#(okay actually her name is spelled Viktoria but shhh who cares)

[cuteniarose]

A conversation I had with my sister this evening, transcribed from memory:

Vi: So Giovanni doesn't feel too strongly about gay people either way EXCEPT when it comes to either Jessie, James and Meowth, or his son, then he quickly becomes homophobic

Me: ...His son?

Vi: Silver?

Me: Who?

Vi: Silver? The Gen 2 rival?

Me: First time I'm hearing of him. All I know about Giovanni's family is that silly theory that he's Ash's father

Vi: HOW do you NOT KNOW Silver??

Me: Do you really think I'm so well versed in Pokemon lore that I'm aware of ANYTHING going on in Gen 2???

Vi: I infodump about Pokemon all the time to you!!

Me: Yeah, but NEVER about Gen 2!!! And come on, cut me some slack, it's not like you know anything about stuff I'm obsessed with

Vi: You mean the mess you made of LoK canon? I know enough about that!!

Me: Like what?

Vi: ......Is Ming-Hua still a swampbender in your AU or did that get retconned?

Me: She is

Vi: Okay good, so that, and uhhhhhhh..... Suiren and Midori are sisters and Mingzan's kids, Suiren has a thing with Kuvira, and......

Me, after some silence: Is that it?

Vi: Well it's not like there's a wiki detailing all the intricacies of your multiverse!!

Me: I did make a masterpost on tumblr about it

Vi: Seriously?

Me: Yeah, because Sydney was interested

Vi: ...Who's Sydney? I know that's not the name of your doctor friend

Me: And what's the name of my doctor friend?

Vi: Kat

Me: Oh, you actually remember

Vi: So she didn't have some kind of realization and decide to change her name?

Me: No, Sydney and I met not too long ago, she's obsessed with Wan, Raava and Vaatu–

Vi: Why do you always find friends with the nichest interests imaginable??

Me: It's a gift. Anyway, she was interested in my multiverse and I got invested in the modern AU she returned to recently after like, ten years. She even let me insert a few OCs into it!

Vi: .....Are Raava and Vaatu still giant spirit kites in the modern AU, or are they human?

Me: They're human

Vi: OH THANK GOD I was scared there'd be some kind of Lovecraftian eldritch horror thing involved. I'm struggling to imagine them as humans though

Me: Well, Raava is a perfect student and piano prodigy who started rebelling in her teens, and Vaatu is her childhood frenemy who's an overdramatic theatre kid Light Yagami kinnie. And all of them smoke weed

Vi, with a half confused, half outraged stare: ....what?

Me: An american thing, apparently? Sydney's from Ohio, they told me that pretty much everyone they know has smoked weed and done at least one other kind of drug before. They even offered to help out if I ever need to write characters using drugs or whatever

Vi, looking absolutely flabbergasted at this point: Ooooo...kayyyy, then..... and here I thought the spirit kites smoke weed because then you can make a pun that they're high as a kite

Me: ...That's dumb

Vi: And everyone smoking weed isn't?

Me: Not everyone! Suiren doesn't smoke weed!!

Vi: Whatever. And now I'm picturing them smoking in their kite forms. They can stick the blunt into that rhombic shape with the dot they have on their fronts

Me: THOSE ARE THEIR EYES

Vi: WELL HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT? And I'm pretty sure that's something you lot made up and not canon. Besides, I just finished reading The Kite Runner for school, I definitely know more about kites than you do

Me: Can we drop the high kites topic now?

Vi: K, sure. So, you have a new friend who used an unspecified number of drugs in the past. Great company you're keeping

Me: ....She also showed me her tits once

Vi, going all red in the face: SHE WHAT?????

Me: NOT LIKE THAT. SHE'S A PHOTOGRAPHER AND IT WAS ARTISTIC NUDITY

Vi: You know what? None of my business. Go indulge in your weird modern AU where the spirit kites are human and everyone smokes weed except for Suiren– hey, how does Suiren fit into this?

Me: You know how I said Vaatu is a Light Yagami kinnie? He's convinced that Wan is the L to his Light, his arch nemesis, all that. He quotes Light's monologues all the time and Suiren is his Ryuk. She watches him behaving like a freak, munches on some snack in the corner and enables him because it's fun

Vi: Ah, so she's the kind of friend who's only a friend on the surface and will bail as soon as shit starts going down? I mean, Light asked Ryuk for help exactly once and Ryuk straight up killed him

Me: No, she's actually a pretty good friend, at least when it came to letting Vaatu borrow a skirt and lipstick when he realises he's transfem

Vi: ...YOU MADE THE EVIL CHAOS SPIRIT KITE TRANSFEM???

Me: IT WASN'T MY IDEA I'm just going along with it. Turns out he never wanted to date Raava, he wanted to BE Raava. Why, is that a problem?

Vi: No, just... do you realise how nuts that sounds out of context? LoK's Book 2 antagonist has a gender crisis and realises she's transfem and the one who helps her feel gender euphoria is the daughter of LoK's Book 3 antagonists. Does that not sound INSANE to you?

Me: No?

Vi, after a long suffering sigh: And here I thought what you did to LoK couldn't get any worse... [in reference to the modern AU in general, NOT transfem Vaatu]

TL;DR: @rokurookajima somehow became the topic of conversation between my sister and me for a good 10 minutes :P