#but ultimately it’s not something i can really control
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i actually firmly believe that even if for the wrong reasons, curly was right to not give anya the captain gun.
im basing this on the assumptions/readings that a) jimmy was abusing both curly and anya in different ways, b) he assaulted anya in her sleep (i have several reasons to believe so) and as a consequence c) curly did not realize things were that bad until it was way too late (obligatory "even though yeah he should have taken anya seriously from the first report of 'hey jimmy was in my room last night'") but neither did anya really grasp just how badly she was being abused until after the dead pixel conversation (i think this is important because it shows just how careful jimmy was in his machinations).
the thing is we want to believe that oh sure if anya had a gun it would have been fine. but the other thing is that if you have a weapon in self defense - your attacker also has that weapon. giving anya the gun would have been as good as giving jimmy the gun and cocking it for him too - not to mention we actually experience that the gun isnt easy to fire, thus making it less reliable in the case of an emergency than one would think.
anya assumed curly wouldnt have given her the gun because she knew his relationship with jimmy, she knew curly would be worried she would hurt herself with it and she knew the company sucked and would have penalized them all if the gun got out of its case for reasons they dont deem "justified" - they didnt put locks on the sleeping quarters, i doubt they would rule anya's personal safety as reason enough. i think her assumptions in that were correct, curly isnt super strict as a captain but hes not "sure heres the super locked safety gun" lax. he trusted swansea with the axe because he trusted swansea to use it appropriately, he wouldnt have trusted anya with a firearm if she was in mental distress.
i dont think those were the good reasons to not let anya protect herself in this way ("corporate/jimmy will get mad" just is not it). but i do believe if he did give her the gun it would have been a matter of time before jimmy gets ahold of it and shit goes south a lot sooner. i believe jimmy isnt brave enough to do anything to anya while she could ask for help - his entire tactic is based on only letting anyone else notice small things that he could make excuses for. he probably would have taken it from anya while she was asleep, when she didnt have it right in her hand, when she looked away for a moment. it doesnt really matter, he would have found a way, boom, jimmy has a gun now.
why i think that would have been a lot worse than him acquiring the gun as late as he does in the game is that jimmy is pretty much fueled by a hunger for power and control. he gets those once curly is out of the picture as someone capable of running the ship but before the crash? hes very sneaky about his manipulation. he goes after anya physically when nobody can catch him because he can overpower her but he wouldnt try something like that with curly who is likely physically stronger than him (curly weight lifts in his free time!) which is why he puts pressure on him emotionally. the crash is actually very convenient for jimmy, he gets to usurp the title of captain without having to actually do anything to curly himself (as in, with his very own hands and with the intent of getting him out of his way). i just truly think if he had gotten his hands on the gun while curly still fully believed he was his friend and could fight back things would have gotten very ugly a whole lot faster.
tl;dr i think "anya should have had the gun" is something we want to believe would have saved the entire crew but considering jimmy's methods of exercising power over his crewmates proves otherwise. curly had the wrong reasons to not arm anya, but ultimately the longer the gun is out of jimmy's view the better.
#mouthwashing#oh no im doing analysis now#pls be nice if you wanna discuss#curly mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers
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Marriage AU needed its justice lol
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Adam and Lucifer were sitting together in the living room while Nifty was cleaning the place with such passion, the Devil waited patiently for Adam’s answer to his offer. He knew he’d need time, obviously.
Adam: So let me get this straight. I, give my soul to you, and in return you’ll be giving me protection?
Lucifer: Yup, that’s it! And you’ll be under my care and service and all that.
That made the tiny maid interested. The ultimate bad boys, getting in a situationship? Ohohoho.
Nifty: Ooh, what do we have here?
She secretly went behind Adam’s chair and pretended to swipe there, she always wanted to know if these two had anything to do together.
Adam: Under your service? What’s that supposed to mean?
Lucifer: Means you’ll be under my command and control, obviously. A little payback.
Adam really, REALLY hated the idea but he supposed he didn’t have much of an other choice. Even though Lucifer’s face made him want to punch him.
Adam:.. Fine. What will I be signing?
Lucifer: I am working on it, don’t worry.
Adam: You better.
He got up and left leaving Lucifer sighing and doing as well. On his way he didn’t notice the short pink maid following him.
((I hope this is good for a start? Idk.))
((That's a great start!! Can this one take priority 🥺))
Lucifer went into his office at the hotel, he needed to put the finishing touches on Adams soul contract. He couldn't believe that he was going to get to own his soul.
Nifty watched as he wrote the contract and then left to go to bed. He had left the contract open to let the ink dry. She rushed over and looked at it and read it.
Well this needs adjustments! This works more in Lucifer's favor than Adam they need something more mutual.
Nifty grabbed a pen and got to work adding everything she wanted to the contract. There!
Nifty: Hehehe perfect.~
She hurried along to bed herself, she had worked on that contract for four hours.
The next day Lucifer rolled up the contract and walked out with it, he brought it to Adam and almost joyously handed him the pen.
Nifty watched from afar, she couldn't wait!
Adam sighed, better than being murdered all the time. That's what he had to tell himself. Hesitantly, he signed his name on the dotted line.
In a flash of gold light, three things appeared on Adams body, a golden soul chain that connected to, a golden pointy crown appeared on his head wrapping around his horns and a gold ring with a diamond on his ring finger.
Lucifer got a matching one.
Adam: Ummm, the fuck is this?
Nifty: YAY!! Congratulations!!
Adam and Lucifer jumped.
Lucifer: Huh? For what?
Nifty: For getting married.
Adam: WHAT!?!
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osi’s midnight masquerade; a theatre troupe of queer vampires who play by their own rules. Would you be able to tell us a bit more about the vampires who make up this theatre troupe? 👀
I couldn't begin to understand the lives of these salacious vamps, so, I'll let Osi provide clarity ;)
a mini wip intro for chirstmas?? i think yes
WIP INTRO - Osi's Midnight Masquerade (narrated by Osirys himself)
Being a vampire isn’t a blessing. Let’s start there. It’s not the romanticized eternal youth nonsense you read about in books or see on glossy screens. It’s not the allure of satin sheets or the thrill of moonlit hunts. It’s a tightrope walk, every step one miscalculation away from falling into something dark, sharp, and impossible to climb out of. I would know—I’ve been walking that line for centuries.
To most, we’re the fantasies they want to believe in: seductive silhouettes cutting through smoke and shadows, predators with a touch of tragedy. People want us to be beautiful and dangerous, the ultimate contradiction. They want the dream of immortality wrapped in silk and sharpened by fangs. And we let them believe it. We have to. The truth? The truth is too messy, too raw for their imaginations to handle. Without connection—without others to keep us tethered—we lose ourselves. The hunger takes over. The walls of who we are collapse. That’s why I built the Masquerade in the late 70s. Not just for the performances or the power, but for the people. For the family.
And what a family it is. Deeply flawed, creative, brilliant, infuriating—but mine. Each of them brings their chaos, their hunger, their fight. Every single one of them keeps me grounded in ways I can’t always explain.
Milo is the heartbeat of the Masquerade, the one who keeps us moving even when everything else threatens to fall apart. Her music isn’t just accompaniment—it’s a command, shaping the energy of every performance, holding the audience in her grip. She doesn’t simply compose; she controls, her hands always in motion, her mind consistently several tempos ahead. Small-framed, but impossible to miss, Milo has a presence that feels like gravity, the kind that steadies the room while reminding everyone who’s really in charge.
Her sharp, hazel eyes don’t miss a thing, and her voice—measured but biting when necessary—can cut through the noise like a conductor silencing an unruly orchestra. She thrives on precision, on keeping chaos at bay, but she’s just as willing to unleash it if she thinks we’ve earned it. Milo doesn’t deal in softness, but when you’re spinning out, she’s the one who holds you steady, unyielding and certain, even if she’ll never admit that’s what she’s doing.
Still, Milo isn’t easy to know. For all her command, she keeps most of herself locked away behind a wall of sharp wit and sharper boundaries. You’ll catch glimpses sometimes—in the way her fingers drift over the piano keys during a rare moment alone, or in the weight of her gaze when she thinks no one’s looking. But the second she realizes you’ve noticed, she shuts it down, turning back into the unflinching architect of the Masquerade’s rhythm.
Vinscint is her constant, the foundation beneath her intensity. Tall, broad, and deliberate, he moves as if he's never rushed a day in his life. His calmness steadies the surrounding storm, and his strength quietly holds the Masquerade together when everything else feels like it’s falling apart. They create a balance—Milo’s sharp drive is softened by Vinscint’s patience, while the weight of his silence is anchored by her commanding presence.
Together, they’re the reason we’ve even lasted this long, the ones we all look to even when we won’t admit it. Milo keeps the rhythm, Vinscint keeps the ground beneath our feet, and between the two of them, we manage to survive.
René? René is my star, the one who steps into the spotlight and makes you forget the world existed before he arrived. He doesn’t just perform—he commands. When René moves, it’s with a grace that doesn’t feel learned, as though the stage itself bends to accommodate him. His voice has a richness that fills every corner with the theater, every word an invitation laced with danger, every glance a challenge you know you’ll lose but can’t help but accept.
His presence is magnetic and intoxicating in a way that feels unfair, like the universe cheated by putting that much beauty, talent, and raw hunger into one person. He burns so brightly it’s a miracle he hasn’t engulfed himself entirely, and yet there’s always the sense that he might. He leans into it though, weaponizing the tension, the risk, and the inevitability of his self-destruction. He thrives on it, and the audience does too. They adore him, worship him even, and René takes that adoration like it’s owed. Because to him, it is.
Tof is something else entirely. He doesn’t just stir up chaos; he is chaos, wearing it like a tailored suit, all sharp smiles and sharper edges. He steps onto the stage with a kind of careless confidence, like he owns it—and, in a way, he does. Rules mean nothing to Tof. He doesn’t just break them; he obliterates them, scattering the pieces for everyone else to trip over while he watches from the sidelines with a grin that could cut glass. He likes to see how far someone is pushed before they snap, and when they do, he’s there, ready to offer a smirk or a sharp quip that makes you wonder if he planned the whole thing.
But here’s the thing about Tof: he’s not as reckless as he wants you to think. Beneath all that chaos, there’s a mind that’s always working, always calculating. Every sharp word, every sly grin, every rule he shatters—it’s all deliberate. He’s not just ahead of the game; he’s the one running it, even when it looks like he’s spiraling out of control. That’s his brilliance. He’ll make you think he’s falling apart, but the truth is, he’s the one pulling the strings.
Now, of course, Tof does have one glaring flaw—or maybe it’s just part of his charm. He can’t keep his dick in his pants. It’s not just the sex, though that’s certainly part of it. For Tof, it’s about the game, the thrill of pursuit, the power of knowing he can have anyone he wants—mortal or immortal. It’s the tension, the chase, the way seduction gives him the upper hand before the other person even realizes they’re playing.
Moving on to Xaviyr, my baby. My soft spot. My reminder of what it was like to feel alive before the hunger sank its teeth into me. Xaviyr is young by our standards, still carrying a kind of softness the rest of us can’t afford anymore. His face, round and open, hasn’t yet been hardened by centuries of survival, and his wide, dark eyes still hold questions instead of answers. There’s a quietness to him, a gentleness that stands in stark contrast to the sharp edges of the rest of us.
But don’t mistake that softness for weakness. Xaviyr may not burn like René or cut like Tof, but there’s a strength in his stillness that’s impossible to ignore. He draws people in without demanding their attention, makes them feel safe without ever promising safety. It’s a skill none of us could replicate even if we tried.
Still, I worry about him. Xaviyr’s softness is part of what makes him so vital to the Masquerade, but it’s also what makes him vulnerable. This world isn’t kind to people like him, and I can see the toll it’s already taking, even if he doesn’t admit it. He’s learning, though. Learning how to navigate the hunger, the power, the constant push and pull of what it means to be one of us.
Pandora, the silent watchdog of our darkest secrets, her gaze defined by the weighty burden of her knowledge. She is known for her clairvoyance, an ability that survived her transition into vampirism. Her eyes, like deep pools of wisdom, perceive the fragile fissures in our lives long before they expand, a subtle warning etched in her expression. She is the guardian who steps in when we teeter on the edge of self-destruction, gently guiding us back from the precipice when our blindness threatens to consume us.
And last, but certainly not least, there’s me. Osirys. Osi to those who’ve earned it. I’m the one who built all this, the one who keeps it standing when everything else threatens to fall apart. I’m not the star—that’s René. I’m not the heart—that’s Milo. I’m the centerpiece, the one who holds the pieces together even when they don’t want to fit.
I’m not proud of everything I’ve done to keep the Masquerade alive, but I don’t regret it either. Regret is a luxury vampires like us can’t afford. The stage is what matters. Our family is what matters. And as long as I’m here, as long as the lights still burn and the audience still comes, I’ll make sure the Masquerade survives.
When we come together, we create something special that’s bigger than just each of us alone. On stage, we become unstoppable. The crowd feeds us their amazement, their curiosity, and their willingness to be swept away, and we soak it all in. That’s the real desire—not just our good looks or charm, but the presence we bring. It’s about being able to look someone in the eye and make them feel truly seen, wanted, and alive. That’s what makes us what they call, 'seductive.' Once they experience that connection, they won't want to let it go.
Neither do we.
That’s what the Masquerade is. A lifeline. A purpose. It’s what keeps not just me, but all of us from falling apart; no matter how sharp the line my children and I walk. If holding on to the spotlight makes me a monster, so be it. I’ve learned to live with that. Because at the end of the night, when the audience is gone and the lights fade, I’m still here. And that has to count for something.
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#wip intro#wip#my ocs#writers on tumblr#creative writing#osi's midnight masquerade#writer#oc stuff#writersblr#ocs#writeblr#writerscommunity#writing#queer writers#wip in progress#oc pov#writers#creative writers#fantasy writer#osirys codwell#milo#vinscint#rené#tof#pandora#xaviyr#tumblr writers#writer on tumblr#writers and readers#urban fantasy
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I know a lot of fic writers are currently campaigning against the trend of discord servers where readers privately discuss a fic, but I do think it's an important part of the reading experience in many cases.
The obvious one is readers being able to critique a story without fear of the creator seeing it, which is still important even with something as small as a fanwork. It's clear with a more public platform like Goodreads where authors and reviewers can come into conflict easily. It isn't always in an author's interests to be reading a discussion about their work (whether positive or negative). There's obviously a different dynamic within a fandom, but the author is still the one in control of the story, and criticism can seem especially confrontational if the author feels like an underdog.
With any fandom discourse I stop and ask 'how could this be harmful to fans of colour?' and it's understandable why a private discussion space is useful. If there are issues in the story, readers can work through these without being surveilled. It may not be productive to involve the author during or after those conversations.
There's more innocuous things, too: as a writer who loves doing twists, I find it delightful when readers are speculating/hypothesising but it's tricky to respond while maintaining narrative tension. A story problem might ultimately resolve itself satisfyingly, but an author promising 'just you wait!' can be really frustrating.
It can also just be embarrassing to be effusive to an author. I can see how beneficial it would be to compose dispatches ('here's what the chat thought of this chapter!')—even in the case of a critique that's been workshopped to constructively help the author improve on an issue. For those authors who are posting WIPs in to the void only to discover it does have fans, that's a bummer, but you can always post a note asking for discussion—obviously there's cases where we do find out we have a micro-fandom, because there's posts about it. Still, I don't think the comment section is a perfect substitute for a groupchat. Lurkers are gonna lurk: if you take away the choice between public and private, I think shy readers would opt not to talk at all.
As an author I totally understand the craving to devour every little thing everyone said and check every emoji in every message for maximum serotonin (or keep myself awake picking over criticisms), but I think art gets stronger every time someone interacts with it, and sometimes those interactions won't involve the creator. It's kind of amazing that a story can travel beyond your own reach. Like... it's fanfic, you know? We're all poachers here.
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There's something about the way Temir seemed to be picking apart the pieces of their conversation that led Karthisius to believe he'd done this kind of dance before. How long can a being exist in this kind of LIFE before they are forced to reconcile with the idea of their lack of control over anything. Karthisius had made a POINT to be independent if for no other reason than he wouldn't be SUBJUGATED by a POMPOUS GOD KING like Zeus. The admission that he had little clarity on the gods of other pantheons makes SENSE of his behavior and after a moment, Karthisius speaks again.
"It depends on who you ask–in some cases they are beloved and revered. In others they are tyrants who are ONLY capable of cruelty. I tend to view them as the latter, but my experience with them has been limited to my godhood, and I've NO INTEREST in continuing to have to learn my lesson so to speak. The point I made earlier about the things you've been told regarding your sky gods, actually applies to the gods in my pantheon. It's largely why I refuse to live on Olympus amongst them. They're tyrants and monsters, I haven't any interest in forcing myself to be around them."
He knows ultimately his experience will forever be skewed due to the nature of his ascension, but it was irrelevant what the reasoning was behind the gods of his pantheon acting the way they did, THEY allowed him to struggle alone, and for that he refused to IGNORE it. That was simply the introduction to what all else came following it. In the end he figured it was moot to try and make amends to people who would never actually have an interest in making it right.
When asked about what exactly had happened between him & Zeus he lets out a quiet sigh. It wasn't a conversation he ever really had, and even when he did on the rare occasion he was willing to share the tale, it was ALWAYS viciously unpleasant. He elects to keep it short this time.
"My transition into godhood was a difficult one, and it should never have been a SITUATION I was forced to sort out for myself–Zeus seemed to disagree considering he willingly was complacent in allowing me to struggle. What he did not foresee was how DEFIANT it wound up making me. Everything else that came after was just a DETERIORATION of an already broken situation."
That was it. The doubt was there, perhaps not seeded into his mind since it had already been there, but awakened from the darkened depths, dragged to the surface with every word from the other gods' lips. It was a strange feeling, to have a buried part of himself resurface like disturbed sand beneath calm waters. Too many thoughts came to light, too many memories, too many options, worries, anxieties, fears, and they all sought to hound the deity, swallow him whole and spit him out the other side.
But what would he be on that other side? Hardened? More bitter? Something more akin to his father? Or something new? Something better? Who he could be, who he should have been?
No, he needed time to think, to let it all sink in if he dared. Would his father know? As soon as he stepped out of this protected realm, would his father sense his doubt? Would he feel the growing distance between his son and his ideals? Did he know about Shyngay? Was this what his little brother was out there somewhere feeling at this very moment?
"I need time to mull things over..." Temir decided in a more controlled manner, always falling back onto that business-like demeanour as if he simply needed to look over a few documents and not reevaluate his entire existence.
But there was one more thing that did catch his attention. "The gods of my pantheon, those outside of my siblings and I... what are they like?" It was a question he'd never really asked before, not outside his family, the answer always being the same. They were monsters, hated his brothers and sisters, shared the blame of their father amongst them for simply existing. They were just physical embodiments of Erlik's spite, his cruelty. Which was true, but was that all they saw them as? "I have to admit, I've never actually met them myself. They're not exactly a part of my everyday circles. No gods are, other than my family. If I need something, of course. They can be rather useful when you need to sway public opinion or shut someone up." He saw no reason in not being honest about the fact.
Though that brought forth another thought. "What happened between you and Zeus?"
#𝘴𝘰 𝘯𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘢𝘹 𝘩𝘪𝘮; 𝘪'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦* ( ic )#𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯; 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴* ( c. karter kane )#𝘪 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘮𝘪𝘥𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵; 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘸𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘯* ( canon: godhood )#turkicgods
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Gonna be honest I followed you back when you posted that first DP comic. I loved it so I followed you, and now fast forward three years later and I've been enjoying your other content so much that I genuinely Forgot that you were the one that made all those incredible comics all that while ago. Bro you're so interesting. Thank u for existing and creating as you do, even if what exactly you're creating changes <3
oh my god this is so sweet and nice of you to say i’m gonna cry????
#splashasks#anonymous#i saw the first part of the message and opened it fully expecting a lighthearted jab about ‘haha idk why i’m still here’#and then you just#surprise ambush my feelings??? like this???#i don’t talk about it too much bc it’s not really a huge deal but i do have this lingering sense i’m never really making what people want#and i do my best to make up for it by trying to at least make stuff that’s enjoyable whether or not people care about it the same way i do#but ultimately it’s not something i can really control#so hearing this is like#idk just thank you
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Btw just want to be clear that Time and Time Again is set to, and will if I don't pause, conclude in May 2025!
Webtoon didn't want to renew or give me any extra episodes so I'm trying to work with what I have. I'm sorry it's ending sooner than I'd like, it's been difficult to come to terms with and challenging to condense my plans.
You deserve a solid conclusion, and I've spent months writing to try and reach that. If there's anything you'd really like to see before it ends, do let me know in case I can (and want to) fit it in.
I'd rather not work with them again, and I hope I won't have to! But coming off of years being overworked and underpaid does not make that easy, to say the least...
I'm doing my best, and I hope you like what I have coming up.
#years of being overworked. underpaid. and literally manipulated and gaslit lmfao#it does not feel good to beg to be treated equally. and then told to be satisfied with less than that#it has been repeatedly demoralizing and insulting#and im not doing it again#i would rather nanny again (most exhausting job ive ever had) than work with them again#but. i would rather not!#I'd rather continue to make comics#but to do it full time i would need like 500 patrons on the $5 tier minimum...#which is SO MANY PEOPLE and incomprehensible to me#ive already proven to myself i can live on 25k a year but obviously its tight (i live in socal)#this. is not what this post is about#it's so hard for me not to complain about them#i feel bad for my current patrons i only share stuff on discord as of right now#well i do the merch packages but like#it's mostly just my discord#just dont have the time or energy to manage my patreon#cause idk if yall know but patreons site is TERRIBLE from the creator side???#it takes like 5 minutes to upload a single post it's ridiculous#so i cant manage it rn. I've thought about hiring someone to help me with it but i cant afford any help#anyways ultimately this is informing people its gonna end#and is turning into a vent around all of the stress surrounding that#like i literally had to take a couple months to just be sad its gonna end and come to terms with that#its hard! it's hard feeling so tossed aside and having your stories controlled even in part by someone else#anyways yeah#i havent finished writing the last arc yet#so theres space for me to fit stuff if theres something people really want#so id like to get in what i could if i can!#text post#sorry i always turn any thoughts about comics into vents about webtoon#theyre so ass man..... it's fine. im gone in may...
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im kinda glad i was a tiny child when windwaker came out and i only played it years later without having internet access for the longest time bc i would have NOT survived the hatred i know ww got when it first came out bc it wasnt what most people expected (ww is my fav zelda)
loving botw but not liking totk and seeing the vast majority praise the latter like its the holy grail while alot also discrediting and needlessly hating on botw for it is already making it hard to stay calm about :U
#ganondoodles talks#special interest go brrrr#sucks when you care so much about a piece of media thats out of your control and it does something you hate#i do not control the hyperfixation#it wouldnt be so bad if people wouldnt keep hating on botw just to praise totk more tbh#and before people say but arent YOU doing the same thing in reverse???#welll ... its suppposedly a sequel yes?#direct sequels should build on the first title and totk does the opposite doesnt it?#again one of my biggest problems is that it was advertised and called a direct sequel qhen it really isnt#like at all#how some characters also made a weird turn in their personality it really does feel like it did a majoras mask thing without admitting to i#like majoras is GOOD#it was weird and kinda nonsensical but ultimately worked#can you imagine if totk just went with the whole other dimension thing properly and really went ham with it-#.... i am coming up with even more ideas for totk rewritten arent it..#anyway i dont think im gonna get a collectors edition ever again given the risk of me not liking what its for#regret spending that kind of money on it after i calmed down my fears and in the end they turned out to be mostly right#;__;
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Bonus:
2.22 (46) / 2.24 (48) / 2.25 (49) / 2.35 (59) / 2.39 (63)
#like servant like sultana huh? but this time it's *Mahidevran* who apparently mirrors Gülşah as we see her rule later. both got these#positions so unexpectedly - it should've probably been someone else but it's them and they're *thrilled* as they can finally achieve what#they've always wanted through these promotions: to command power over these so despised people that have disrespected them; that they've#been embarrassed by; that have even taken their most cherished away; for Gülşah it's something more general/all-encompassing opposed by#many people while for Mahidevran it's something more specific opposed by a single person but both *feel* that same drive to seek#accountability and justice to the point of enacting revenge anyway. they both ultimately get carried away by that pull. they both operate#by letting people know they're in charge through pulling rank as an absolute lecturing that precise tradition and order that puts them#above brazenly issuing orders to discredit and/or outright punish those who've offended them: it's one person Mahi/Gülşah have a particular#beef with during their rules (Daye/Hürrem respectively) but Gülşah didn't show any resentment of Daye until that point thus Daye is more#the cumulative power Gülşah is starting to lord above while Hü is that exact hurt for Mahi bringing it all back to the general vs. personal#there're other notable differences here like in their speeches about order/tradition because quite a part of Mahi actually believes in#the good these traditions can bring and their necessity as much as she resents their restrictive ruthlessness but Gülşah doesn't believe in#any tradition really she just mirrors what she's seen and known her entire life using it just for her goals no more no less;#for Gülşah all will be okay only when they do what she says because she's so understandably insecure about her authority over *everyone*#while for Mahi all will be fine only when the order is kept in general including there being no unrest among the concubines#(hence peace; another pre-Manisa to post-Manisa transitional point perhaps?); they both want 2 certain ağas to “understand” but while they#say they do without much/any question for Mahi no matter how much they dislike it they are almost forced to by Gülşah and they don't hide#not their dislike but *disregard*; even Gülşah's short rule is telling of her position: SS dismissing her is completely out of her control#she's removed before even doing all that much - another symbolic reminder of how little agency she has - while SS dismissed Mahi because#she truly screwed up a lot in spite of her being framed this is the one time she was given *all* the agency; they both encounter the person#they're replaced with but with Gülşah it happens immediately to highlight the out-of-reach suddenness while with Mahi it happens afterwards#as a result almost. I included the bonus parallels because while Mahi didn't rule the harem then it was almost a set-up for that with a S2B#bent to it while Gülşah as treasurer highlights that this is indeed a harem within the harem; it's Mustafa's harem now as a preparation for#Manisa while also being a culmination of Gülşah's own arc (I kind of like that in spite of their relations being brought back to normal#Gülşah still doesn't have that many scenes with Mahi or in general compared to S01; it adds to this little rule's culminative feel)#also Mahi looking carefully through the concubines to truly pick who she thinks is best while Gülşah is just ecstatic to make calls at all!#magnificent century#muhteşem yüzyıl#mahidevran sultan#gulsah hatun
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it's been a strange arc so far
when I was 19-21 and having an extremely imbalanced relationship with someone in their mid 30s I was like 'we are both adults so the fact that this is fucking me up is my fault'
when I hit my late 20s and saw how young people in their late teens and early 20s seem now I was like 'oh wait I was so fucking young I didn't know shit about my own limits or about managing relationships and I don't know why someone in their mid to late 30s would be into that except for nefarious purposes'
the weird bit is now I'm into my 30s - not even that far into my 30s - and while I still wholeheartedly believe that last thing about how young (and self destructive) 20 year olds are, I'm also kind of like 'huh, actually nobody I know that age has their shit remotely together and frankly the reason this fucked me up is because NEITHER of us knew what the fuck we were doing it how to cope, for different reasons and at different life stages, and there probably wasn't any malice or intent to control as much as there was Blind Flailing.'
#red said#this is about one specific relationship btw.#wanted to clarify that because there have been several men over 30 who fucked me up between the ages of 16 and 21#and i adamently do NOT want to keep pretending that was incompetence. that was predation. sometimes incompetent predation.#but with the person I'm thinking of? she really hurt me and the age gap and difference in life stage was a not insubstantial factor#but mostly she was just spiralling out really badly and i offered her something to hold and she did try to keep things balanced and safe#but she was very off balance at the time. so the fucking up was more that than it was about power or control#we were just both very stupid and very sensible at the same time which is a great way to dig yourselves deeper#and idk I'm like 2 or 3? years younger than she was when we met iirc#and the closer i get to her age the more I'm like yeah you know that's a human reaction. i can see how that happens.#and i kind of feel bad for the amount of bitterness I've held and malice I've ascribed because ultimately#i think it was just two people having different crises trying and failing to figure out boundaries around them#but this has come on really suddenly and it's kind of fucking me up as well#cause I'm frightened of falling back into patterns of oh it's never anyone else's fault that i got hurt#but i don't. thiiiiink so? bc it's really only this one thing. i am not making these excuses for other people.#idk. sometimes people just fuck each other up.#I'm not even sure i think it was a bad thing that it happened. a lot of bad happened but we also catalyzed a lot of change in each other.#i feel like the reason i keep picking at this is that it's complicated. it was not good. it was good.#she really fucked me up and she was a terrible friend to me at times. but she was also the first person to really look after me.#and she kind of helped me start to learn how to need other people. which was good.#when my grandma died she wrapped me in a blanket and cancelled her plans to watch TV on the couch with me#even though she barely knew me at that point#and she was one of the first people to consistently ask for consent and check in. and she did genuinely care about me.#but she also truly fucked me over a couple of times.#but mostly that was just because she was buried in a pit of despair and self loathing.#she seems a lot happier now. i hope she is. i don't know if i want to know her particularly but i think if she's happy she'd be nice to know
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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What's p/p?
Ah, I meant to say, pp, Psycho-Pass. I usually add slashes to avoid unprompted rambles to show up in main tags, sorry if that resulted confusing.
I love Psycho-Pass. I already made a post about why bsd fans might find it enjoyable, but honestly, there's so much more to it beyond what it has in common with bsd.
The prompts for reflection this series offers are just wonderful: on the relationship between citizens and government, on pervasive systems, on freedom of choice and free will, on safety vs. freedom, on discrimination of minorities and creation of scapegoats, on propaganda and brainwashing, on the increasing and treacherous presence of technology in everyday life, on how government uses technology to control and manipulate people, on fighting the system from the inside vs. fighting the system from the outside. I should watch it again too. It's crazy good.
Akane Tsunemori - the coprotagonist of the first season, the protagonist of the second season and overall the true core and heart of the franchise - is one of the most complex and beautiful characters I ever met. Her growth and character development is truly amazing: the way she starts off as unknowing and naïve, and grows so so much from there; how her writing finds this perfect balance between becoming more mature / hardening and staying true to her beliefs - even when everyone, the system, the people she relies to, the people she looks up to - tell her that there's no other way, that it can't be. It's breathtaking. She is a breathtaking character. The way alone that no matter how conscious and aware she becomes of how cruel the world is, how unredeemable people are, how beyond saving the system is, she still keeps believing in humans… It may sound cliché by itself, but believe me, it's wonderfully executed, and her character is truly amazing. Not to mention, the way she mirrors the coprotagonist Kougami is fabulous, but this is not really about him; she's an amazing character of her own right, and I will die on this hill.
The female cast in general is all amazing honestly. Don't get me wrong, the male characters are just as complex and multilayered (and I LOVE Gino and Kou, how couldn't I), but that's… Something we're more accustomed to, while finding well written female characters is objectively much harder. Female characters in Psycho-Pass aren't written as female characters, they're written as people, just as much as their male counterparts are. They have their fears and hopes and strengths and weaknesses just like any other character. I love Yayoi for being strong and coolheaded. I love (LOVE) Shion for being her fabulous self, kind and flirty and confident and with an heart so big, and for her subverting the trope of guy in the chair by being a glamorous woman who's also incredibly competent at her job of analyst. I love Akane's friends and I don't like season 3 but Mai is genuinely awesome and a joy every time she's on screen. I love Risa so much I could die, I love how strong and independent she is, I love the dilemmas she had to face, I love her choices and how they might have been the wrong ones and how it still haunts her, I love the tragedy of her character in general, I love the doomed friendship that used to be between her Gino and Kou. I love love love Fredrica, I love her being bossy and confident, diligent and determined. There's just a lot of… Strong and independent women in Psycho-Pass, and it's not just a way of saying, they really are.
I LOVE women loving other women, canonly, on screen. The confirmation may be delegated to a small moment in the last episode of the first season, but the fact that it's still there nonetheless, and how it confirms that all the previous moments and exchanges were indeed moments and didn't leave it to ambiguity… It's nice, to say that the first season of Psycho-Pass came out in 2012. And you might have to wait eight years, three seasons, five movies for it, but the phrase “I just want to go outside, dine somewhere nice, and go for walks with someone I love” may make it worth it.
And I LOVE how all the leader positions are filled by women. It's a little funny, honestly, in the best way– despite what I made it look like so far, the Psycho-Pass cast is still men-dominated (or at least a pretty equally split 50/50?); yet all the leader positions are always filled by women: Akane and Mika and Kasei and Frederica and Karina, it's always women.
Also, Mika is a brilliant character. Of course I love her. I'm so so sorry for how much hate and criticism she gets (over being a purposely annoying character! Insane! When Dazai exists!), when she does really and excellent job at conveying “look! A fucked up brainwashed individual in a fucked up brainwashing environment! I wonder how that could have happened!”. Not to mention that her growth, her long and devious way to admitting that the system is flawed, is truly well made, too. Unpopular opinion, characters with big flaws, characters who are unsufferable and make lives impossible to everyone around them, characters who mess up again and again, are actually great to watch.
Again, don't get me wrong, I absolutely adore Gino and Kou too ahah. They're both great!! But that you can probably see by your own. Gino in particular used to be my favourite, how his character does a total 180° turn. I love to see men admit their mistakes and make the choice to be better tomorrow.
About that, the relationships between the characters are AMAZING. Especially the main trio Akane / Kou / Gino, all the combinations within it are beautiful and deep and brilliant, so so enjoyable to explore and with their fair share of canon content, while still never straying to romantic territory (I mean, Akane/Kou may be going in that direction, but if that's true, that's the slowest slow burn I've ever witnessed in my life).
What's more. The world building / general premise - a dystopian world, where your predisposition to do crime can be measured and the government makes use of such technology to monitor and control the population and guarantee everyone's safety - is genuinely interesting and compelling. The aesthetic is genuinely cool (AH, now that I think about it, I've got my unfair bias for people in suits, and pp has a LOT of people in suits… ). The opening and endings feature great artists like Egoist, Ryo, Who-ya Extended and Cö shu Nie, so you're sure to love them!!
(Also, Psycho-Pass is something I used to spend entire nights talking about with a friend, and I'm always thinking about her and hold her tight to my heart in every moment so. That's worth mentioning for me, pfffttt. I love my friend so much.)
Finally, because the other Psycho-Pass post I made here keeps haunting me for the lack of trigger warnings, please be aware: Psycho-Pass DOES have trigger warnings. Pretty much for eveything you can think of. Sexual assault and gore and body horror on the top of my mind, but it's quite dark and gritty at parts in its entirety, so please please keep that in mind if you decide to pick it up.
Well, this is the end of my Psycho-Pass love letter for now. Please give it a chance if you can! I'll go rewatch it now. General watch order, in order of release, is season 1 → season 2 → movie → Sinners of the System movie trilogy → season 3 → First Inspector movie → Providence movie. I don't really like the third season or First Inspector movie (the characters are still great tho, even the newly introduced ones), and I've yet to watch Providence. The first season later came out with an extended edition of added scenes between episodes, and they're quite nice, so if you can't get ahold of it, you might want to look up for a compilation of the missing scenes still.
#Me: Psycho-Pass is great! I need to explain people why it's great by exposing different and various aspects of it!#My brain: WOMENWOMENWOMENWOMENWOMEN#To be fair that's just what b/sd did to me lol. I didn't use to pay much attention to it before...#Until it (good female characters writing) was taken away from me#people asks me stuff#Following up ask me what klk stands for so I can rant about it lmao#Although K/ill la K/ill is like. Media literacy level: extreme.#You really have to think it through to get why it's so good–#and the apparent unsuspectable fanservice that doesn't have anything to it doesn't help the case.#(Unless you wonder if the constant fanservice ties with the theme of “women will never be free of objectification of their own bodies–#because that's something coming from how other people decide to view them and thus is out of their control.#The only way to truly be free is to stop giving the things you can't control importance and act noncaring and independent from them–#while you keep fighting for your right to make your own choices in society.#All using as a commentary on how clothing is both women's nightmare‚ something they both desperately hate and yet rely on for strength‚#their biggest weapon‚ their greatest confinement‚ their closest friend and worst enemy.#Ultimately‚ true freedom will not be reached when others stop viewing women as an object for their own pleasure‚#but when women accept themselves and their body and their appearance‚ even naked‚ paying no mind to how others see them.”)
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something just like snapped in the back of my head like i Need to go like curl up in my room for like 5 days and play video games and not speak to like anyone
#^ guy who is not out of a depressive ep like he thought he sorta was#dont even like particularly feel the old urge of the anxiety/need to hurt my relationships like i used to..i just feel like shit.#short list of people i think i could handle like really speaking to rn but ultimately. i just want to be somewhere safe and easy#even if that feeling is like making me feel sorta suicidal still.#just dont have it in me to like figure out how to act normal right now. something i have to do around most people and nearly everyone#i intreact with irl right now#not healthy. Ofc naturally i know this. and i can push through it. im just not excited about it.#the exhaustion to like contain myself is greater than my lonliness even though that is rather large#and i would like to get this out of my system before like. the semester starts next week. which i know i cant like control but whatever#this is all sooooo stupid. i need to be alone but i need compaionship of someone i trust.#it feels like there is glue in my mouth and i can barely speak to people im not close with bc of how exhausted and anxious i am#man. thearpy is like. going to really . idk. probably not help my mood. bc it has been hard for me to word what has been happening to me#and im always so scared of saying something that will get me hosptizaled again. Even when it shouldnt. bc im not going to do anything.#but i am scared and tired simply. and while so much has gotten better and ive gotten so much better there are some things that i just.#cant seem to figure out how to fix or ask for help. whatever. Guy who is stupid and helpless and will have to just get over it at some poin#sry i just feel like shit. i should probably just eat something i havent been eating much. and then i will probably feel a bit better#news with isaac
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rotating akechi in my brain so hard
im afraid to try my hand at actually writing him but oh he is in my head. he's crazy. im crazy. and i would let him take my hand and lead me into the depths of our shared craziness
i diagnose him with bpd and he's in love with yet despises the phantoms
#how can they be so GENUINE#after ALL they have SUFFERED#how can they manage to find happiness with each other after all theyve been through. how can they CARE so deeply for others#others who ultimately dont even MATTER to them. others who are USELESS.#positive emotions make him sick yet he desires to feel them- deep down he truly does#at least i think he does. i think some part of him wants to be able to find that kind of happiness#he just doesnt believe he's able#and also he's so full of hatred and self-sabotage#hes like a self-fulfilling prophecy of misery i think#and i dont think thats something hed be capable of fully getting under control#i think hes doomed himself to misery bcs he refuses to try#i dont think hed have the conviction to make himself better-- which is funny bcs he has insane dedication to literally anything else#think thats part of what makes him have extra complicated feelings abt joker specifically#he keeps trying to push him away and joker refuses and it really ruins the self-destruction when those around you wont let themselves#just be pushed away or do whatever thing u want in order to fulfill that negative prophecy yk#im all over the place my head is just all over goro akechi rn bro#「that’s right everybody. it’s your favorite boy.」 ― out of character
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tumblr was fun... though the majority of my connections are now outside of it and ive accepted that in life countless people you never really got to meet will fly by you, i guess i can still be sentimental about what it was for me as i matured and learned about the world and other people
#i really just stopped enjoying having a social media platform as i started to realize that it wasnt a very fulfilling method of#expressing myself and socializing. for me. at least since people i knew slowly dropped off and it got more and more quiet#the people who ultimately matter the most have already expressed their interest and friendship & i cant invest energy in trying to get#something like that from people who are in the end complete strangers#ive been worried that my attitude the past few months has been alienating to would-be friend-mutuals#but.... in the end theres only so much i can control. its fine#IF tumblr would fully go down i am planning on getting some type of contact with people im friendly with here#though people can also disappear sometimes... hmmm
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Wait…
Using a vibrator on Choso??? Need this… so bad… 😫
Listened to an audio like this and it gave me the idea
Need a vibrator on his 🍆 asap 🙏 🙏
May vegas, goddess of smut, answer my prayers 🙏
using a vibrator on choso ★
warnings. fem! reader, praise, toy usage, ōrgasm control, whiney choso, mdni.
“y- you wanna use that?” choso gulps with an almost chagrined grin. he didn’t exactly mind, especially whenever you wanted to try new things with him underneath the sheets. you’d just gotten done from riding him and he’s catching a few breaths whilst in the midst of speaking to you. with sable irises pooling into you, he then sighs, “how would you even do it? aren’t you supposed to um rub it against there?”
as he says that, his eyes avert right between your legs before he sits against your lap. his head lowers itself back while he gets comfortable, a low huff withdrawing from his rosé-colored lips.
“like how you use it on me,” you hum, picking up the wireless wand. slender finds of yours wrap around it before swiping a thumb against the button to power it on. he stares in awe, gazing at how it’s on the lowest level. choso inhales shortly afterwards, hearing the tumultuous bzzzzing of the toy, pulses of his heart steadily racing. “i’ll just rub it against your tip. can i do that, baby?”
“y-yes,” he nods immediately, sprawling out his legs a bit. the way he instantly responds was so cute—practically cutting you off, barely giving you a chance to finish your words. if it’s with you, he’d never mind. your touch, choso’s ultimate weakness. out of the countless enemies he’s been in combat with, the simplicity of your touch was his far worst enemy he’d never win a match with. with hitched breaths, strands of his ponytails tickling against your skin, he whines. “use it on me, baby. please, just- just hold my hand, ‘kay?”
you hum in response, intertwining your fingers with his as he relaxes against your chest.
“okay, cho,” and your voice was so smooth. he could listen to it all day, the sweetness underneath it had his heart swooning every time you spoke. he’s breathing softly, awaiting for you to do what you spoke. you’re slow, delicately hovering the vibrator before making it graze gently against his tip. immediately, he lets off a whimper.
the vibrations, it’s enough to make his teeth shatter. his whines, even something as simple as his whines was so mellifluous. a tune you’d never want to stop listening to. “how’s it feel baby?”
“f-fuck, ‘m gonna cum already,” he swallows, you’re barely placing the toy over his cockhead and he’s already a mess. the best way to describe it was that it tickled. he couldn’t help but wonder, whenever you used these things on yourself, did you feel like this too? choso swallows an imaginary creeping lump that’s stuck against the roof of his mouth before he starts to quaver. he’s so cute—within seconds, he was already so vocal. he bites down on his lip before another free hand of his squeezes your inner thigh. “hah, i-it feels good. feels really good, princess.”
you simper to yourself, pressing a kiss near the crown of his head. in a gingerly circular motion, you start to move the vibrator all around his cock. he’s a mess, you’re doing nothing but sending choso into straight convulsions.
“so whiny,” you tease, and he’s always been one to be dramatic with his whines and whimpers but he couldn’t help it. this entire new feeling, it was euphoric. you start to tease a bit further, leaning in to kiss the long slope of choso’s neck. he was gonna melt into your hands. you had him right where you wanted him. “you’re doing so good, baby. hold my hand. i got you.”
“t- turn it up a level please.” he mewls out, darkened brows compressing into a firm furrow. his pouty expression only grows, glancing down at his leaky tip that was smothered with pre-cum.
you inch the toy away from his shaft, kissing more down his neck to hear him moan. his entire body, it was frigid and cold— yet the moment your lips paint against his skin like an empty canvas, he’s suddenly hot everywhere.
“another level, choso? you can handle that?” and oh, your words were so sly and salacious. the particular tone that you spoke, you were gonna be the death of him entirely,
“y-yes, i can take another notch. please just, f-fuck me, feels good. make me feel so good,” and his babbles were adorable. continuously, choso swallows, strained breaths pulling out of his full lungs before he bites his lip—this time, harder. “god, i need it so bad. n-need you, only you c-can make me feel this good, baby.”
“mmm that’s right, ‘cho,” you pepper a plethora of more chaste kisses down his neck. he moans from more of your touch.
he had highly sensitive skin, he craves your lips more than anything. especially whenever you’d be an even bigger tease, nipping a few bites towards his precious collarbone. with a thumb, you press the button to go up a higher level and he starts whining louder. you run the front part of the hitachi all around his throbbing head, near the peeling part of his frenulum and he’s losing it. choso’s mouth dangles opens, only the sounds of sweet whimpers leaving . . nothing else. “you’re such a good boy, my good boy right?”
once he hears those words— his heart flutters, with shaky lips, he moans out a sweet, “all yours, ‘m your g-good boy, fuuuck,” and the grip he has against your hand squeezes much tighter. a thumb of his brushes against your palm before he’s almost going limp against your chest. “not gonna l-last. ‘m gonna cum, can— may i cum? don’t wanna make a mess unless y-you say it’s okay, princess. ‘m not a messy boy.”
“but you are a messy boy, silly,” you tease, starting to suck near the center crevices of his neck. he was so weak for you.
the friction—it was merely worthy enough to make his teeth shatter.
choso’s panting accelerates and his legs start to jitter at a rapid speed. “you wanna cum, baby? wanna make a mess for me ‘n let me clean it up for you?”
his eyelids grew heavy. your lovely voice,
your voice alone was enough to make him shoot out such ropes of white. everything was a blur, his entire body overtook itself with a feverish fervor feeling. he’s so hot, clouds of breath remain to slip past his lips before he nods.
“yeah, yeah y-yeah,” and his voice is cracking. the toy’s right near the side of his dick now, then it travels its way down to his base— then back up towards his beloved head.
“oh, oh my,” he hiccups, and he really loses it once you let go of his hand to stroke him off. “baby, f-fuck, ‘m hard. so hard, gonna c-cum ‘n get your hand all dirty.”
“give it to me baby, ‘s okay.” you purr against the shell of his ear.
one hand of yours gives his cock a few solid pumps whilst another is smearing the vibrating wand against his cum-glossed tip repeatedly.
choso kisses his teeth at your words of encouragement and he feels like he’s floating. in fact, he feels like he’s soaring— it’s in a way he can’t really explain, it scratches such a good itch in his brains that the neurons stored inside couldn’t even fathom his incoming release either.
he loves whenever you stroke him, why— mainly because you always do it better than himself.
the way your hands wrap around his fat length, fisting his cock gently around your fingers. choso’s eyes start to roll back before he cums.
“f-fuck fuuuuck.” he stammers, feeling the spurts shoot out in such creamy volume. it’s so thick, some of it dribbles down from his tip and lands on your hand. still heaving heavily, he’s still slumped back against your chest before he hears you turn off the toy, tossing it aside. he’s trying to catch his breath, eyelids still droopy before he turns around to pull you into a deep, sultry kiss.
you giggle—a smile stretching against your lips as you throw an arm around him, embracing in his savory, sweet taste. he’s still all exposed, tip all sticky and leaky with seed. choso tastes sweet, sweet as in he’s been dying to taste you all day.
a tongue of his rummages through your mouth, briefly sucking on yours before he whines once he feels your hands roam. you go back to stroking him and he melts into your touch, pulling away from your lips and burying his face into your neck.
“awww,” you whisper, bringing both arms to hug him tightly. as big as he was, it was as if you were the big spoon.
he’s vigorously trembling, still sensitive from his recent release. it felt so good he didn’t know just what words to get out. as you play with the cute bows he allowed you to tie on his two ponytails, you move your head to give him a kiss on his cheek. “you did so good, baby. such a good boy.”
“i . . i want more,” he mutters, cupping both sides of your face suddenly. you stare into his eyes, almost giggling again before he presses a wet kiss on your mouth. again, and again, and again until your lips are all plump and swollen.
alas, he was serious though. whenever choso gets that instant feral look in his eyes, that’s it.
“what do you want, choso?” you hum, a thumb stroking against the minuscule bristles that reside against his structured jawline.
“you,” he whimpers, licking underneath your neck. you gnaw your bottom lip, feeling a hand of his pry its way between your legs before his head lowers. you watch, and he gets a face full view of your panties. choso pouts, sliding your underwear to the side before glancing up at you— a single soft kiss goes against your now exposed cunt before he sighs. “i’m s-so thirsty. let me make you feel good too, baby. please.”
#★vegasbaby.#choso smut#choso x reader#choso kamo smut#choso x you#choso kamo x reader#jjk choso#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk x reader smut#jjk imagines#jjk drabbles#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#anime smut#female reader
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