#but this specific version was so good it’s the one I make

[menlove]

youve probably answered this before but what DO you think is the most realistic version of what went down?? like do you think paul misinterpreted john's hints or that john never made it clear enough to paul how he felt? i know theres no way to know but you have such a good grasp on their personalities and this seriously might haunt me forever lkadjf

i actually don't think i have ! i wrote a lil speculative Thing about what things would look like if paul were queer and closeted (which is what i think) and that interpretation but never specifically this question but...

this is long and rambly but have my thoughts lmfao

basically To Me i do think they had some sort of sexual relationship. to me it's honestly the most likely scenario given the..... everything. their interactions with each other, some of their songs about each other ("i used to hold you in my arms"), the way things blew up so spectacularly, etc. and my reasoning there is mostly that. we know already that they had really loose sexual boundaries with each other. they jerked off together, they fucked women in the same room together & allegedly together as well. and already just those two/three things constitute as a sexual relationship, but not smth they would've seen as one.

but i do think they did more than that. i mean, it doesn't really matter if they did more than that, the rest of what i'm gonna speculate stands even if all they ever did was jerk off together and fuck women together, but like... aside from the like Mountains of evidence that there was something there, i just think it makes sense w their personalities. john isn't the type of person to have self-restraint and i don't think paul, especially when he was younger, would've turned john down. i think if john was into men (which he was, we know this) and if he was into paul (incredibly likely) then he would've made a move. and i think if he made a move and got rejected he would have raised hell, and that never happened.

i think they probably started doing shit together (again, the extent of that is debatable) and they absolutely did Not think of it as being anything queer. i couldn't tell you the mental loops they tied themselves in there, but i have Some thoughts just based on who they are. i think john probably passed it off as like "a hand's a hand, a mouth's a mouth" type of thing (which is hilariously something yoko talks about him saying in her audio diary during the white album sessions). and i think paul probably saw it (& any other things he was doing with men, if he did) as something fun that feels good and isn't something he needs to like look into deeply. i think neither of them would've thought of themselves as queer, bc they probably thought of queerness as very binary- you're either gay or you're straight. and they both were into women (.....ostensibly) so they couldn't be gay. i think john like realized, on some level, that he was queer and Hated it about himself for a very long time and only started coming to grips with it towards the end of his life. i think paul eventually came around to it but by that time he was married to linda (& if rumors are to believed, possibly having threesomes with her and men lmfao) & i don't think he would Ever want to come out publicly even if he's out privately (which i do think he is).

so why didn't they get together? why is paul so insistent that john was straight and not in love with him? i think they just genuinely never talked about it. ever. like i don't think they had that conversation. if neither of them were gay and their sexual relationship was just john and paul things, there wasn't any need to talk about it. queerness was more acceptable for the young. not in an open sort of way, absolutely not, but in the way that they could tell themselves they'd grow out of it, they were just messing around, etc.

i think things got harder when brian died- he died queer, alone, and in a situation that a lot of people thought was suicide. and ofc, we know the band didn't think it was suicide, and i don't think it was either, but that's the kind of thing that sticks in the back of your mind. esp if you're like john who had a lot of mystical/magical thinking. i think it was a bit of a wake up call. time to grow up. i think they both thought they were each the Only one dealing with actual queer feelings & attraction to the other and were soooo sure the other one was just straight and fucking around. which probably hurt, quite a bit, but wasn't something they wanted to look at anyway.

and when john got with yoko and got serious with her, i think that was the bubble bursting. cynthia was different. they got together so young, he never made her a priority, he cheated on her constantly, belittled her, didn't have a place for her by his side bc he carved that space out exclusively for paul. and you can tell that just by the amount of quotes paul has about john marrying yoko being the catalyst, about it being time to grow up, etc which is insane considering he was already married and so were george and ringo. for years. so it was something deeper than that. and it's bc he was actually taking yoko seriously. paul's spot as john's primary partner got filled by a woman. who john was genuinely in love with, not like cynthia which was a marriage fueled by the age old tale of an unplanned pregnancy and comphet. and paul can't argue with that. like....... if he viewed what they were doing as messing around as kids, with john being straight and him being the one pining, he wouldn't want to fuck up john's chance at a Normal Straight Love. if he were a girl, he could, but he wasn't. what he Could do was match him and grow up too. cue the immediate pivot to get married and have children, eventually fulfilled in linda.

but i don't think he expected the band to implode just bc they stopped being so close in whatever manner. but it did. along with other reasons, obviously- there's a million reasons the band broke up, but i think they could've weathered it if they had kept the closeness they'd had at the beginning. or if they'd been single or even if they'd just kept viewing each other as their primary partner aside from their wives.

i think they both came to terms with what they actually meant to each other in the 70s, but they never actually... told each other. what we have from john is jealous guy, which paul was allegedly told was about him, and that demo version of real love that paul never even heard where he laments about him having a baby/farm and how he used to hold him. there's also (just like) starting over, but that one's easy to see as being for yoko too and paul wouldn't have thought twice about it. then you have now & then and real love, which were on that damn tape for paul :( like he literally didn't hear them until after john died and we know he likes the idea that now & then is about him but even then he doesn't sound totally convinced

for paul we have a lot. but a lot of his like more vulnerable songs were only released after john died. like here today, obviously, but there's also some pretty telling ones that john never would've heard (like best friend, which he played live, but wasn't on any album until 2018. or a more of a Stretch of one but i 100% think is about john, hey diddle, which was kept off ram and only released in 2001).

so like i think they very much both came to grips with the fact that they had been in love with each other, but they never really.... thought that could be returned. so ofc paul's going to say shit like how he likes the theory that john was in love with him or wrote now & then about him. but he doesn't believe it, because to him john was Genuinely straight and he was the weird one. and vice versa. i think i saw a more recent thing from him coming around more on the idea of john being bi, but honestly i think that's just hard for him to come to grips with bc what the hell are you supposed to do with that? like yeah, he was into men, possibly even romantically, on a genuine level, just not him? that's hurtful. i don't think he wants to think of that option. bc that's more likely to him than the idea that john was in love with him and hiding it the whole time. which is also heartbreaking. bc then it's just a tragedy of circumstances and missed chances- which is what i think it was. and neither of those routes are something i think he wants to consider, so john has to be straight in his mind.

but if he's coming around on that, he's probably coming around on one of those two options. i hope it's the latter bc the idea that he'd think even now that john never loved him is just so fucking sad. and considering his comments about now & then, as well as the lyrics video for now & then, i really do think the latter is more likely.

anywayyyyy tl;dr i think they fucked around sexually in Some Way, never said a single thing romantically, both came to terms w their feelings in the 70s but by then it was too late and they didn't think the other one would reciprocate anyway, and now paul's been trying to come to grips w the ambiguity of their relationship for the last 40+ years.

[the-bonfires-ember]

fuck it ill do it myself

Being in a Relationship with Someone with NPD for Dummies

**I would like to open with the preface that if someone is not willing to work on their NPD or to work through elements of their mental illness that strains your relationship, then they are not ready to be in a relationship. I got super lucky in that my partner was over-therapised tbh and so is able and willing to make the accommodations I mention here but that will not be the case for everyone. Think it through carefully. Everyone deserves love, but they should never feel like they need to sacrifice their own wellbeing to give it and get it in return. Be safe and look after yourself**

This is written for people in romantic relationships but with some editing, it could be useful for platonic relationships also

So, the first thing I want to explain is Narc crashes. Maybe you've heard about them, maybe you haven't but understanding them is, I think, the most important piece of groundwork you could have. Think of NPD as a hard shell over something very soft and gooey. Anything can cause the shell to crack, even the most gentle of taps. And those cracks can vary in size, so that sometimes only a little bit of the insides ooze out, and sometimes a lot pours out all at once. Someone with NPD has built their ego and external image to shelter a typically very young and fragile version of themselves. And when that shell breaks, it can feel like an attack on that weaker part. NPD crashes look different depending on the person. For me, as an example, I get this overwhelming feeling that I am going to be discarded and left alone. Which is particularly unhelpful in a romantic relationship but we'll get there. For other people, depending on the severity, they could lash out, get very defensive, or start having ideas about self harm and suicide. I don't really get that bad anymore, but I also haven't crashed so catastrophically in recent months.

On to specific advice!

Make a plan of what to do in the case of a crash. This can be anything from, 'tell me that you still love me and that you aren't going to leave' to 'leave me alone, I can't regulate around other people'. It could be physical comfort, it could be getting them something sweet to eat when they are calmer, or it could be a bath. Have a conversation about it when you are both in a good mental state and make a plan. Keep in mind the differences in severity so that you know what to do and how to react.

When you have a problem, bring it up gently and carefully. When they are doing something that you want to question or ask for them to do differently, remember that they will take it badly if you handle it wrong. I don't mean 'just let them do whatever they want forever'. That is both unhelpful and unrealistic. Of course there are going to be things you need to discuss. Just be cautious about your words being interpreted as a threat to them. This can be another thing you discuss together ahead of time so that you can formulate a way of phrasing such things in a way that they feel more comfortable with.

Keep your emotions under control. If you are mad at your partner with NPD for something, get a hold of that anger by yourself first and then bring it up with them when you are calmer. Getting angry at someone with NPD creates a loop of them feeding off your anger, getting anxious and overwhelmed by the perceived aggressive nature of the conversation, and immediately going into defense mode - which tends to make you angrier and then it just loops around again and no one benefits from that. I mean, I think this applies to all relationships but taking out your own emotional responses on your partner is especially damaging when they have NPD. It hurts us much more deeply and for much longer.

To break those things down to their base components, you need to have a lot of patience and emotional maturity. Which is a big ask, and I'm sure there are people out there who have made it work somehow without those things. I don't know of any personally, but I'm sure it has happened before. Either way, make sure that the relationship works for you too. If you have to go to all this effort for the one you love, they should be willing to do the work for you too.

People with NPD deserve to be loved, but no one deserves having to hurt themselves to keep loving the one who is doing that harm in the first place.

Mental health is complicated. Personality disorders are complicated. Frankly, people are complicated. Maybe some of what I've said is valuable to you and your partner, and maybe none of it is and you are still able to be in a healthy relationship, even if it looks different to mine. And that's great! As long as it works for you both, do whatever you want forever.

Just be safe and take care of yourself first and foremost.

[williceunleashed]

The Fruitsaladshipping Kids !

It was time for a post about them 😭 They are born a few years after the end of BW2 ! They all have a first name and a middle name so that both N and Dardanne could pick a name for each. Dardanne cursed his kids with the Kalossian names, and N cursed them with special interests related names.

Also both N and Dardanne are AuDHD. Which means the kids are AuDHD SQUARED

Supplementary infos under the cut !

-> The three of them are fully bilingual and are fluent in both Unovan (from N) and Kalossian (from Dardanne). Funnily enough, N isn't fully fluent in Kalossian yet, so while his children will talk to him in almost perfect Kalossian, he will respond in messy Kalossian with a strong Unovan accent.

-> Right now, Appoline is the only one with the ability to talk to pokémons. It is likely that Calixte can do it too, but he is too young to be certain yet.

-> The children evolve in N and Dardanne's house, alongside their parents' pokémons. This means that they basically grew up in-between humans and pokémons for their whole childhood, making them very good at understanding pokémon body language and cries, even if they didn't all inherit N's ability to communicate with them.

-> N keeps Zekrom in this version of the story, and reunites with Zoroark and Klinklang, so these three are also part of the family. These kids were born with a dragon god in their household

-> Family-wise, Anthea and Concordia are very present. They happily babysit the kids and have galarian tea parties with them. The children are very close to their aunts and gladly spend time with them. Anthea and Concordia need more love and they would 100% be there for their brother's kids. They most likely have a specific day in the week for family time where Anthea and Concordia come around to spend time with the children.

-> Alder (N's father figure) and Rood (Dardanne's father figure) take the roles of grandpas/great-grandpas for the children. Despite their age, they act playful with the kids and play along with them. While Rood is sweeter and gentler, Alder nurtures their natural abilities for battle (It makes N grumpy, but whatever). Alder and Appoline tend to be very close, because Appoline keeps trying to beat the crap out of his team with her tynamo. Alder sees Appoline has massive potential as a trainer, and gladly takes her under his wing to mentor her. Rood, on the other hand, tries to be the best version of himself around the children, trying to right his wrongs on N's education by taking great care of the kids.

-> While Appoline is more of a classic trainer type and will most likely capture different pokémons later in life, Scoot seems to only be interested in psychic types. Calixte seems to favor steel types.

-> N and Dardanne still don't approve of the Pokédex and the use of Pokéballs, but they don't impose their belief on their kids, letting them choose their own path in life. Appoline wanting to be the next Unovan Champion does make them anxious, but they understand that Appoline's tynamo is just as competitive as she is and that Pokémons can genuinely enjoy battling. And so they still nurture her dreams. They are trying to unlearn the idea that "battling is inherently bad", and Appoline's determination to become the next Unovan Champion is a pretty good exercise fo that.

-> Dardanne's family has no tie with the kids, and for all they know, Dardanne has been missing for years with no sign of life.

-> It is very likely that N tried to reconnect with Ghetsis out of guilt and genuine compassion, despite Dardanne desperately trying to stop him. (I mean N accepts his parallel-universe father back with little to no questions in Pokemasters, knowing that this Ghetsis isn't the broken inoffensive one, but the unstable BW2 one. N is way too good and caring and wouldn't want even his father to suffer). Ghetsis didn't care much about reconnecting with N, seeing how psychologically damaged he is post BW2. Trying to get his father out of his lethargic state, N tried introducing him to his children once they were old enough. At first Ghetsis didn't care much either, but slowly came a bit back to life when he had to interact with them because the three of them kept causing chaos and mischief in his house. Genuinely, Appoline, Scoot and Calixte are revenge for his abuse of N. They drive Ghetsis insane and they destroy his furniture. Appoline must have instructed her tynamo to thunderbolt Ghetsis at least once. Usually Melony is 100% on the kids side and gladly helps them to drive Ghetsis nuts (Melony will never stop bullying Ghetsis)

-> N and Dardanne don't really let the kids near the Driftveil Safe House, because they fear the grunts would start worshipping them the same way they worship N because of the brainwashing they went through in Plasma.

-> Bianca, Cheren and Gray (BW1 protagonist in that story) hang around a lot. Cheren is the most "adult" in the group and struggles a bit with children, but Bianca and Gray will happily spend time with the kids.

-> In general, the kids have no knowledge of Plasma and N and Dardanne's backstories. For all they know, Dardanne rescues Pokémons and has a part-time job at a Pokémon Daycare, while N works in engineering (Becoming the ferris wheel man he always wanted to be). Later in life, when the children are old enough, Anthea and Concordia babysit the children for N and Dardanne to travel and explore the world outside of Unova.

-> As for nicknames, they call N "dad" and Dardanne "papa". I know some English-speaking folk sometimes use papa as a name for their father, but "papa" is the universal name for fathers in French so here it is 😭

[abigailspinach]

How had the virus gotten in? The facilities were state-of-the-art. The water on the chicken farms was filtered, supplied by their own wells. The chicken houses had giant fans that created one-way air flow through the barns. The facility was surrounded by sturdy, well-maintained fencing that kept wild animals out. Employees weren’t even allowed to keep their own chickens at home.

Their investigation led the researchers to conclude that this particular case involved a distinct set of “just right” conditions that allowed the virus to blow onto the chicken farm through the wind.

Wild birds that carry flu viruses in their guts and shed them in their poop are believed to be the main way H5N1 has been introduced onto farms. Still, experts say the windborne spread of bird flu has been suspected before.

“The whole idea of potentially being sort of wind-driven has been out there for a while,” said Dr. Richard Webby, who directs the World Health Organization’s Collaborating Center for Studies on the Ecology of Influenza in Animals.

“It’s incredibly hard to actually measure,” he said, “to get the definitive data to say yes or no.”

Webby wasn’t involved with the new study but said he’s been in touch with a veterinarian in California who believes wind may have played a role in the recent spread of H5N1 between some cattle herds in the Central Valley.

But even if it is moving through the air, he said, that doesn’t necessarily make bird flu a bigger threat to people.

For one thing, the current versions of the H5N1 virus that are infecting animals don’t seem very good at infecting humans. The more the virus spreads, the more opportunities it has to hone its craft and get better at breaking into human cells, but for the moment, there’s no sign that it’s made this leap to being a fully human pathogen.

For another, it takes just a tiny amount of virus to make a bird sick, and it would probably take a lot more to infect a human. Particles, even viruses, disperse in air, meaning any virus in the wind is likely to be present in only very small amounts.

Then, the researchers checked the weather patterns for the week the chickens got sick. There had been a steady breeze from the west. There was extensive cloud cover, which would have blocked germ-killing UV light from the sun. The temperature was cool but not freezing, between 40 and 50 degrees, and viruses love cold air.

In other words, perfect conditions to transport a virus and allow it to survive a long trip.

Dr. Kamil Sedlak, who directs the State Veterinary Institute in Prague and is senior author on the study, says that after they explored all the possibilities, windborne spread was the best fit in this case.

“I think that under certain specific conditions, the spread of the avian influenza virus by wind can occur,” he said.

The Czech researchers published their study as a preprint, ahead of peer review.

Webby said the virus particles could also have hitched a ride on something larger, like dander from the ducks, and that’s what allowed them to travel so far.

--

That may be why the chickens got sick more slowly: They were getting a lower dose of the virus from very low levels carried in the air. The fact that the first chickens to die were near the air intake vents was another clue.

---

“I think the airborne transmission should be on the table,” she said.

But it’s tricky to bring up because people might hear “airborne spread” and feel powerless to stop the virus.

“Often, people say, ‘Oh, it’s in the wind. I cannot do anything about it.’ Then they stop doing the basic biosecurity that it’s also very important that they have to do,” she said.

But she says they’re forgetting lessons from the Covid-19 pandemic about how stopping the spread of a virus requires layered approaches to protection. Current precautions like restricting entry to farms and wearing personal protective equipment should be kept in place, but filtering the air in barns could also help protect animals and farmworkers from bird flu, too.

Dr. Michael Osterholm, who directs the Center for Infectious Disease Research and Policy at the University of Minnesota, also thinks windborne spread is playing a role in H5N1 transmission now.

“I think there is more wind-driven H5N1 occurring right now in the community because of the number of aquatic of waterfowl that are infected,” he said.

Waterfowl like ducks and geese poop in lakes, he says, and wind blowing over that water may carry the virus to nearby farms.

“We’re in unprecedented territory right now,” Osterholm said. “It’s all over the country.”

Osterholm thinks airborne or windborne spread might account for some infections in which a source of the virus – like contact with a sick animal – couldn’t be identified. The recent case of the three veterinarians who tested positive for antibodies against the H5N1 virus at a conference comes to mind. Two of the three had no known exposure to sick animals.

“I think it’s very low-risk for humans to be infected with the virus like that, but I think it happens,” he said.

[rebo-chan]

Yesterday, I decided to assign all of the Vongola Kids desserts and list my reasons along with it. After sitting on it for a night, I decided to make a post about it!! Consider this my Vongola kids flower post 2.0. (Aka another excuse to infodump about desserts, the same as flowers..) sJKNG one day I'll make a serious analysis post again but today is NOT that day. For now, these are the insane ramblings of someone who looked at a dessert and said "IS THIS A VONGOLA CHILD?" for 2 whole hours until the desserts started to speak back to me. Something something, stare into the abyss and it stares back at you. Please... enjoy the vongola kids dessert-ified... Which one of these would you try personally? <3 Put underneath the cut for length purposes~

Tsuna: Purin Pudding/Custard Pudding

Okay so just look at it. thats tsuna. Soft and smooth, easy on the tastebuds. The special thing about Purin Pudding is that the caramel on top can be cooked for a shorter or longer time to change the flavoring up. Darker is more bitter, while lighter is sweeter. This creates a dessert that if you're someone who prefers a specific level of sweetness/bitterness; a purin pudding can be a good dish to suit your tastes. There's a level of this pudding for anyone. It's a flexible harmonious dessert, and can be enjoyed by everybody. Just like our boy, Tsuna. :)<3

Also, shoutout to my friend who pointed out that in the Sanrio collab, Tsuna was paired with pom pom purin. This was completely unintentional on my part but I'm taking that a sign from the universe that I'm right SGKJN.

Gokudera: Berry Trifle

So, this is a very overwhelming dessert with lots of layers. You take your first bite and you don't even get all the flavors. its all berry which is like this mixture of sour and tangy. Then you dig further in and you start to find that sweet cream inside of the dessert. If you're willing to try and dig that far in and see him for what it is, eventually, the cream and berries will mix together towards the bottom into a delightful cream, berry, and cake treat that will be a wonderful mixture of sweetness and tangy. It represents his character and the devotion in him that becomes sweeter the more work you're willing to put into him.

Yamamoto: Anmitsu

A Japanese confectionary that uses agar, the white jelly that you see, which is made from red algae. This fits very well in the fact his family owns a seafood restaurant. Red algae can be turned into something new, yet still traditional to its home country. I believe this represents our baseball player turned samurai for his family quite well. So, water is used to melt the agar, and the dish is lined with fresh fruits and topped with sweet black syrup for flavoring. Overall, this ends up creating a simple, sweet, and refreshing dish to consume. Yamamoto at his core represents tradition, innovation, and is a refreshing force within his family.

Ryohei: Maple Walnut Pound Cake

So, where I'm from, pound cake is a breakfast food. You don't have it very often, but it's a filling treat you would have with tea or coffee. There's the equivalent dessert referred to as bundt cake, but bundt cake tends to be lighter and more airy. Pound cake gets its name from having 1 pound of each ingredient, and can be in whatever shape it wants. Bundt cake tends to be made in the shape of the image you see above. A pound cake CAN be a bundt cake, but bundt cakes are not pound cakes is a good way to see it. Anyway back to Ryohei, pound cakes are the heavier version and fill you up quickly so therefore they're great for an energy boost in the morning. The flavor and nuts provide a sweet crunchy taste that I believe fits Ryohei well, as someone who trains and is a charged battery of energy. (Also healthy protein in the nuts, since he's an athlete LOL) He's a lot to consume, but he'll keep you going throughout the day.

Lambo: Taffy

Obviously Lambo has to be a candy. He HAS to be. Lollipops were too simple for him, and his grape candy that he eats in canon is just too vague to find an answer for. I stumbled upon taffy, which is sweet and hard that you have to suck on to enjoy and it takes awhile! I thought the toughness of the taffy represented his role as lightning guardian well, then you consider the long time it takes to eat representing how he’s going to grow into someone really strong. And finally, because he’s a little kid and taffy is a kid’s candy……also it comes in grape. (Also, Taffy tends to be either you love it or you hate it and that's pretty Lambo in canon haha.)

Chrome: Choux puff/cream puff

Choux are really light and airy. I don't know if you guys have ever had them but it feels like biting into a sweetened slightly crunchy air hksnj. Barely present. I think just how airy this dessert is fits her well. There’s a bit of a shyness to this dessert I can’t explain it. But I think whats extra special is that choux puffs can baked in masses and slowly put together into a croquembouche which is a giant tower of cream puffs. These are made specifically in celebrations, typically weddings or christmas.They're very expensive, very elegant, and huge symbols in France. I think it’s a great way to show Chrome’s growth into herself as she slowly grows from a single little pastry into a magnificent sight. Or maybe I'm being too poetic abt desserts that one small dessert can become something great with time, precision, and hard work put into her if someone is willing to try.

Mukuro: Baked Alaska Flambe

I mean look at it. LOL. It’s a huge meringue layering that gets burnt on the outside by the flames via blow torch, creating a smokey crunch on the outside. The meringue layer acts as an insulator for ice cream that sits on the inside so it doesn’t melt. In a way, I think this represents Mukuro well. A burnt outer layer that protects the sweeter interior. You can take the burnt out layer to be how he presents himself, but truly is kindhearted on the sweet inside interior or you can view the burning meringue layer as the side of him that allows himself to get burnt to protect the family he's managed to gather together.

Hibari: Rakugan

He was hard. He really truly was hard. Eventually, I stumbled upon the Rakugan. They’re a type of wagashi (thank you to my aforementioned friend for giving me the idea that he'd be a japanese confectionary... my ass was looking at chocolate cakes LOL), and more specifically a higashi. This refers to dry Japanese candy. Basically, they’re a candy that has all of the moisture sucked out of it (less than 10% of water remains!), but once you put it in your mouth it melts away quickly once water is mixed in. Much cloud behavior. Also they’re really cute and intricate with various different designs and he likes cute things (thanks unnamed friend lol). You eat them with green matcha tea, usually served formally at tea ceremonies or given at shrines and buddhist temples as religious offerings. Very traditional sweet made out of pure sugar. I think the fact you enjoy this sweet with the bitter matcha taste mixed with the traditionalism fits him very well. They're also deeply connected to the region of Kanazawa in Japan, just like Hibari with Namimori. I had a very funny interaction with my friends in regards to this dessert, because doesn't it kinda look like it would taste like soap??? LIKE THAT'S JUST SOAP. DRY. SOAP. I enjoy the idea that Hibari be this very gorgeous and history-filled dessert, and then taste like dry soap that you need to drink tea with to stomach. It just? IT FITS HIM.

Thank you for reading this far if you did <3 Which would you EAT!!! If I had to pick one, I would eat the HELL out of ryohei. i looove pound cake.

[funforahermit]

I'll be honest with you, I listened to Steve Wrigley's podcast episode with Rhys just now and I thought it was really great.

I know Steve's not exactly the fandom's favourite person, and in fact I agree with most of the reasons why, I just maybe don't lean into the "therefore he's clearly a toxic person" vibes too much I guess?

There's one thing I want to talk about though, which is why I'm here - In their conversation, they touch on the topic of mocking/making fun of people as part of comedy, and whether or not it's okay to do it, and they kinda land on the conclusion that it shouldn't be taken too seriously. And I get what they mean. However...

I believe it's important to consider that ridicule is also a very effective instrument of oppression. I know because it worked on me, big time. I grew up laughing at so many groups, and individual people too, that the media told me were complete idiots, and I'm only now finding out that their ridiculousness was just made up of half-truths and twisted facts specifically because someone wanted their credibility destroyed to make themselves look better. It's comedy abused as dangerous propaganda, and it fucking works. Once we start laughing at someone, we don't listen to them any more. Just think about the woman who sued McDonalds or whatever it was because "her coffee was hot", for example. I believed it. I laughed. I made my own jokes about it, for years on end. I didn't think twice about why she might have been right to do it. We weren't told the facts, we were just told a comedy version of it, with the good side and the bad side clearly assigned, and we bought it. So this is why I'm extremely wary of it now. And I get really uncomfortable when comedians think they can mock anything and anyone they want, because in the process they could - even accidentally - take away precious credibility from someone who actually needs and deserves it.

I almost want to tell all this to Steve, make him aware of this angle, maybe make him think a little bit more about who he really wants to mock. I think he's big on not taking any sides, but then maybe leave politics alone altogether, it's just too important :/

Anyway, I'm evidently not good at articulating what I mean, let alone in a concise not-rambly way, so I won't.

[the-witchhunter]

Apples in Caramel Bourbon Sauce

Want a delicious dessert? Want to up your game? Why not both? This recipe once literally got me laid, it’s that damn good, so use at your own discretion

Or not, I’m not your mother

Ingredients:

2 apples (gala or honeycrisp recommended)

1/2 cup - 3/4 cup sugar (depend on size of apples and thus the amount of sauce needed)

4 tablespoons butter (I use salted, if using unsalted I recommend a pinch of salt on the final step)

“A splash” of bourbon (couple tablespoons to a 1/4 cup)

1) core and cut apples. Peeling is optional. Smaller pieces will cook faster so I prefer cutting into 1/8 slices and cutting those slices I half, but theoretically you could just cut the apples in half. Just make them roughly the same size

2) have all your ingredients on hand. Seems silly to make this its own step? If you have to hunt down during the next step you risk burning and starting it over. Just have your stuff ready

3) in a dry frying pan, add sugar and heat on medium. DO NOT WALK AWAY! Heat until sugar is melted and caramelized. It’ll start to darken and at this stage it can go from perfect to burnt very quickly. Stir with wooden spoon if needed to prevent burning but it’ll likely clump. Just break up clumps and it’ll melt when it’s hot enough.

4) add the butter and stir to combine. At this point it’s a very rudimentary caramel sauce.

5) add apple. It’ll likely seem too thick and not coat the apples immediately but just let them cook, stirring occasionally until apples are tender. How long? Depends how big you made your apple chunks. Sauce will get thinner as it pulls out moisture from the apples 

6) fish out cooked apples once tender and set aside

7) reduce sauce for a minute or two

8) add splash of bourbon (not from the bottle directly) and cook until harsh alcohol taste is cooked off

Serve by itself or the recommended method of over a scoop of vanilla ice cream, still warm

Makes 2-4 servings

[monofazz]

Shattered Glass makes me violent and sick actually.

inspired by zorangezest and this set of tags in the reblogs in particular

[meamiki]

Happy Anniversary In Stars and Time!! Have some Friend Quest based drawings :D

(These have specific quote picks related to them! And there's also a long ramble on why I like those specific quotes below if interested)

(And by long, I mean roughly 2k+ words of proper ramble total, so be warned before clicking keep reading this link right here to the rb!!)

[doverstar]

actually I love Tentoo and he is the Doctor and it was the only ending for Rose that worked and it is a huge gift to be able to have the man she loves grow old with her, they were always heading for that, y'all be quiet. I 100% understand the angst but it's okay, they're okay, good ending-

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

Sophie Oliveira-Shepard Alenko-Oliveira and Kaidan Alenko-Oliveira - ME3 (3/?) "What would I do without you?" "You'll never have to find out." Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)

[essektheylyss]

I did get called out by my therapist for blorbo crimes (nicely, she was very supportive and encouraging so this is largely a joke) over the fact that I made soup, bread, AND now meat pies this week, but you know what? I have soup, bread, and meat pies. And this is what's important. 😌

[paintingskyblutf2]

happy halloween!

and happy scream fortress! make sure to complete your contracts before it ends!

[icewindandboringhorror]

I've referenced before how I have a big google document to keep track of every media I've ever seen in my entire life (just for reference because I like to track everything possible lol… I am the Data Collector), but recently as I was updating it, I thought of actually evaluating them to find out random percentages (like for example, out of Total Shows Watched, what percentage did I finish vs. stop watching, what percentage did I like or dislike, etc.)...

Evaluating these things is made easier by the fact that I already place everything on each subsection of the list into 6 broad ranking categories, so I don't have to go back and guess to figure out how I feel about them or anything. The categories are: Ranking 5 - overall best* (despite some criticisms of course because I'm too much of an Analyzer to ever find anything Perfect lol) Ranking 4 - more positive than neutral, but not good enough to be 5 Ranking 3 - either the good + bad negate each other, OR it's just not memorable/interesting in any way enough to be ranked higher or lower (this is the Default category ALL things are placed in if no other rank applies) Ranking 2 - maybe a few redeemable elements but largely more negatives than positives Ranking 1 - So bad that it circles around to being fascinating to observe in some way (not necessarily Funny, or Good, but just interesting somehow) Ranking 0 - Bad in a genuinely frustrating or obnoxious manner

*("best" primarily defined here as most interesting, rather than most good in a technical sense, or some other measure. I tend to value more highly whether there's something novel or thoughtful about the worldbuilding, tone, writing, base premise, etc - than about whether it's actually executed perfectly.)

And here's the amount of shows that have so far been placed into each category -

TV shows ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 20 shows ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 28 shows ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 114 shows ~ Rank 2 (mid low) -33 shows ~ Rank 1 (low low but intriguingly so) - 14 shows ~ Rank 0 (iredeemably low) - 2 shows

This would make for a total of 211 TV shows overall. However, there are 57 shows within these list marked as "didn't finish" (typically meaning I quit on the very first or second episode - but log them still to keep a record that I at least had a brief view of them).

So my total of genuinely fully watched shows would be more 154. 211 Total, but a More Accurate Total of 154.

Counting them all and using the Total Number Of The List (211) -- that means roughly 9.5% of all total shows I have ever watched (or at least attempted to watch) have been Mostly Good, 13% have been Moderately Okay, 54% have been either entirely Forgettable or some mix of good + bad that lands them right in the Neutral Middle, 15.6% have been Mostly Bad, 6.6% have been Bad (but in an interesting way), and 0.9% have been Terribly Bad.

Additionally, I didn't even get past the first two episodes of about 27% of the total.

Sooo, discounting ones I didn't finish, my total TV shows ever watched in my life would be about 154 (maybe give or take a few, assuming I might have forgotten some from very long ago).

But instead of entire life, let's just say this is the total for 'About 20 Years' (so, not counting very early childhood when I likely wouldn't remember things I saw/have no detailed recollection of them (like for example, I'm sure at some point when I was like 4yrs old I must have seen an episode of Spongebob or something, but I have zero distinct memories of it, can't quote anything of it, and barely recall the premise - so I don't count it on the list, etc.)).

In that case, 154 divided by 20 would be roughly 7.7 shows a year.

Which is actually surprisingly low considering that I often have stuff on in the background for hours whilst I make sculptures and do costumes and stuff (maybe I should have also marked some distinction between 'things I fully paid attention to' and 'things I kind of half listened to whilst sculpting', but that would further split the categories too much probably lol), but I guess a lot of that is youtube videos or random documentaries, so .. eh.. maybe I get it being lower.

Now, doing the same thing for movies-

Movies ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 4 movies (3.4% of total) ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 12 movies (10.3% of total) ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 91 movies (78.4% of total) ~ Rank 2 (mid low) - 8 movies (6.8% of total) ~ Rank 1 (low but interesting) - 1 movie (0.8% of total) ~ Rank 0 (irredeemably low) - none in this category (0%)

That makes 116 for a Total (Actually Remembered) Movies Watched In Lifetime (Or At Least In 20 Years).

116 divided by 20 is roughly 5 or 6 movies a year (I feel this has probably been skewed though by adding everything since like elementary school onwards, as I remember a lot more movies from child/teen years.. Whereas, the past 3 years I feel like I've barely seen maybe even 5 movies?? lol). I also have "Didn't Finish" marked on 18 of them. Which means I quit halfway through about 15% of the total movies.

So, a for broader summary stuff..

I seem to be less forgiving to movies than tv shows, by far. Which makes sense to me, I guess, because I love elaboration and details, so "short form" things that only last an hour or two are often lost on me a bit. My biggest complaint with movies is indeed usually walking away just wishing there had been more exposition, more scenes where characters are doing nothing, more "mindless bantering" conversations, more Quiet Downtime and Lore Elaboration and so on lol, so... of course most 1-2hr films end up feeling a bit Not Enough To Draw My Interest/Nothingy to me.

If you count 5 and 4 as "like" and rankings 2 to 0 as "dislike", then for TV shows I at least somewhat liked 48 of them, and at least somewhat disliked 47 of them.. So it's almost exactly the same lol. I'm just about equally as likely to find something bad as I am to find something redeeming about it. But overall, the largest chance is that I just won't really care much for it at all and it will be tossed into the 'neutral' pile, forgotten forever. Movies have a bit better of a balance, "liking" 16 of them, and "disliking" only 9 of them. So I'm slightly more likely to enjoy a movie than to find it annoying - though still VASTLY more likely to just not find it anything in particular, possibly not even finishing it.

ANYWAY.. this is vague and literally pointless, but like I said, I just really find information fun. Like my document where I've rated every apple flavor I've ever tried (like 40 of them now?), or reviewed every oreo flavor (32?), or ranking data from my entire 10 years of Trying To Make Friends process (out of 100 people, roughly 8% chance of a moderate compatibility, 3% chance of high), or etc. etc.. I love to have random pointless things to analyze I suppose lol.

I doubt anyone tracks things in their life in this same exact way, but I'd be interested in hearing any at least somewhat similar data !!! (like, how many TV shows you watch a year on average, and what percentage of those you like vs. dislike (if you keep track of that sort of thing), etc.)). I guess it might be easier with movies, since I think some people use those websites where you curate a list of movies you've seen and you can rate them or something, so maybe the numbers are already available on those places. :0

[haveyouplayedthisgame]

Tetris (Any version)

[al-luviec]

still haven't moved on from zane in this episode (aka I hit tag limit again and am unhappy about it)