#but they're not as uncanny as the live action

[smallnico]

can you tell esper is uhhhhh. ill?

got tagged by @beecreeper for the character insp meme! (check out his here!!) this was a lot of fun, there are a couple of honourable mentions i'll get into under the cut, along with some elaborations for the curious.

list of names, L > R 1: harrowhark nonagesimus -- the locked tomb saga 2: isaac -- castlevania (netflix series) 3: cole -- dragon age: inquisition 4: blackbeard -- our flag means death 5: (bingo free space) 6: seven of nine -- star trek: voyager 7: katya zamolodchikova -- real life / unnnhhhh 8: paul muad-dib atreides -- dune 9: maomao -- the apothecary diaries

1: harrowhark nonagesimus -- the locked tomb saga

if you've read the locked tomb, this one's pretty self-explanatory. but i took a lot of inspiration from harrow's grief-sodden religious zealotry for esper's pre-tadpole self, and i think about harrow the ninth every time i write from esper's perspective during the events of the game. it's the amnesiac goblin madness for me. esper would also absolutely put their bone marrow into a soup to kill someone if that was something they could do. they're extra like that

2: isaac -- castlevania (netflix series)

i just fucking love isaac, man. he's such a fascinating character, taken from a place of pain and degradation into the service of a mad god-figure hellbent on destroying humanity, then banished and forced to just. figure out for himself what he wants to do with his life. and it turns out that what he wants to do is relate to the hellbeasts he raises to use as soldiers, and let them try to eat strawberries and live in houses for a change, take a chance at living as something other than vessels of violence. i love him. that's really all esper wants, too -- to find a peaceful existence after a lifetime of pain and brutality and monsterhood.

3: cole -- dragon age: inquisition

cole is such a vibe. he lives in the attic staring unsettlingly at people and reading their minds and exhuming their pain so he can help them with it, including with his knives. he has that unearthly creepy vibe that esper projects, as well as their tendency to poke around in people's private emotions and their slight uncanny distance from human morality and ethics. making cole more human also ends up around the same for esper -- cole is never quite all the way there, but happy to be truly Among the people whose souls he reads and finally able to experience those things for himself.

4: blackbeard -- our flag means death

apart from the leather and queerness and propensity for violence, blackbeard was also a big influence for esper's journey from "yeah, this violence thing is fun for me, besides it's not like i can Leave this life, i'm stuck here so i might as well enjoy it" to "actually even though it's fun it's also exhausting and all i really want is peace. maybe even a monster like me can love and find a community that loves me."

6: seven of nine -- star trek: voyager

god, where to start? "i was a child who was raised to be perfect, my humanity and individuality were completely overridden and my very body was used as an object for unimaginable violence, and now even though i don't know how to be a Person anymore, i'm cut off from everything i've ever known and i don't know what to do." and now, like seven, esper is just trying their best to build a personality out of the leftover scraps they have with the help of their crew of misfits and weirdos. also, perpetrator trauma -- like seven, esper doesn't feel Guilty about their past actions, but it does haunt them, and they don't really know what to do with it. also, i didn't mean for the two images of esper and seven here to make them look exactly the same, but hey.

7: katya zamolodchikova -- real life / unnnhhhh

this one's more of a bit. i watch unnnhhhh with my wife a lot, and every now and again katya will just say something that makes us both go "that's esper-coded". she has that slightly imperfect balance of genuine darkness and unhinged silliness that esper also teeter-totters between, which results in a specific kind of charisma that you kind of have to see to understand.

8: paul muad-dib atreides -- dune

esper's pre-durge and pre-tadpole backstory draws a fair bit of inspiration from paul's narrative arc lmao. he starts out life as a male heir to a bloodline of female psychic specialists, trains with them, and ends up sacrificing his humanity to fulfil a violent divine path pre-ordained for him. real evil messiah hours. esper has way fewer qualms about killing from the start, and the match isn't perfect, but this is an inspiration, not a stencil.

9: maomao -- the apothecary diaries

another weird one, but probably the most purposeful inspiration on the board here. when i was first playing as esper and trying to sort out their personality, i was also watching apothecary diaries, and maomao's feline predilections and sense of mischief and flawless composure and cunning without ambition had me completely enraptured, so i thought, what the hell. she also shares some backstory elements with esper as the [spoilers] bastard daughter of a disgraced but extremely talented courtesan and a creepy war tactician. like esper, maomao just wants to keep her head down and make enough money to fund her special interests. they also both drink poison for fun (at least, esper does pre-tadpole). i think the main thing they diverge on is that esper thinks poison is for basic bitches.

honourable mentions

jimmy "pickles" hoffa -- jimmyhoffathecat

just look at him. that's an esper. photo credit here

tilly -- my parents' house

pretty self-explanatory for any cat owners out there. esper acts like a cat in general, but they specifically act like this cat. she's so influential and talented and perfect.

towa "murase" -- slow damage

this one is an honourable mention instead of being on the board because i didn't meet towa slowdamage until like 3 weeks ago (well after esper was already realized), but the two of them have so many specific things in common it's actually ridiculous. convergent evolution at its finest.

fenris -- dragon age 2

esper and fenris have very little in common story- or personality-wise, but i can't deny that he was a huge visual influence, especially for pre-tadpole esper. i mean, come on. look at him.

yelena belova -- black widow, hawkeye

i'm not much of an mcu person, but the concept of the black widows in general did influence a lot of esper's pre-durge backstory, and i like yelena. she's like a more charismatic and more down-for-murder natasha. she's not a specific inspiration for esper as a character, but they do have a rhyming vibe.

selcis aureus, umbras heltor -- exodusbound

hello, it's fantrolls! i disqualified selcis and umbras from the inspboard because they're literally other ocs i had a hand in creating, and a lot of the things they have in common with esper aren't public, but they both did (and exodusbound did in general) have a lot of influence on esper as a character. i can't help that i like themes of alienation and life persevering in spite of it all in my characters. art shown here by my wife barbelzoa!

espurr -- pokemon

literally a pokemon, not a character. special place in my heart though because i literally named esper after this thang when i first made them in the character creator. they just had the same dead eyed stare and psychic magic, so i went, yeah, that'll do.

thank you so much for reading this much if you did!!!!!

[devon-usher]

Favorite material from which to construct definitely-not-independently-mobile mannequins?

A few examples as food for thought: Wooden (although it’s almost certainly never been part of a tree)? Typical shopping-mall plastic (almost)? Not-quite-skin? Actual skin?

For the sake of Uncanny, the good ol' skin-covered plastic is a classic. The feel of something hard and cold sliding under something soft and- yknow.

Otherwise I'm a fan of metal-plastic mix! Silicone is a good way to hide the cracks between the plastic shells which cover metallic pistons and gears and the like. Classic animatronic style! Kind of like that new FNAF game... Sister Location, I think? But the tube innards aren't as efficient as normal pneumatics and motors/servos, in my opinion.

[frozenartscapes]

Alright, I'm just going to say it:

I think Disney listened when every critic under the sun made fun of the unnecessary CGI Lion King remake for all of the characters having about as much expression as a stale piece of toast. And then they proceeded to completely overcompensate with this even more unnecessary Mufasa sequel

If the animation in the movie is as bad as the trailer made it look...

[inpursuitofnunchi]

am i the only one seeing this??????

[berryshipbasket]

Guys every time I go to look up Clumsy on google just for some cute images I keep getting jumpscared by the one in the live action movies.

HE'S SO UNCANNY... I DON'T LIKE IT. He scares me so much fr Not to be that person but that ain't my Clumsy

[kraniumet]

xmen 97 verdict. weird. like venture bros if it was played straight. and also a webtoon self insert story.

[puranami]

✿ It's The Little Things ✿

A/N: My first time writing! Admittedly I'm very nervous, but also so excited!! Kept it simple with a small headcanon list to start, but I tried to write a decent amount for each point, and I hope that everyone is in character :0 Posting at 4am because I have no control over my life...

Summary: Little relationship things with the Strawhats. Can be interpreted as the anime/manga or the live action version of the character.

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji

Content: SFW, G/N reader, slightest hint of angst in Sanji's part, but otherwise, pure unadulterated fluff! ✿

(Part 2 - Buggy, Shanks, Mihawk) (Part 3 - Franky, Robin, Law, Kid, Killer) (Part 4 - Crocodile, Rosinante/Corazon, Doflamingo)

Luffy

✿ He absentmindedly draws shapes on your leg, back, or whatever part of you is there as you sit together, whether you are watching the waves, or listening to one of Usopp's stories. He is almost magnetic in the way he ends up attached to you. If you're not feeling it, he will do his best to keep his hands to himself, but as soon as his focus shifts onto anything else, they're back on you, drawing little clouds and hearts. He tried, he really did!

✿ This bottomless pit inhales food like it's going out of fashion, but, much to the bewilderment of the rest of the crew, he will actually feed you from his plate as he eats, even though you are eating your own food. It may be a case of "1 for you, 5 for me," but it's almost instinctive for him; he's sharing something he's passionate about with you, and making sure that, in his eyes, you are happy, healthy and strong. He values your wellbeing more than food; you are one of the most important things in his life.

✿ Despite how chaotic he is in every aspect of his life, his presence brings you to a state of complete peace, even when he's yelling about whatever currently has his attention. Just knowing he is there comforts you in a way that nothing, and no one else can. As long as Luffy is there, being the same old Luffy he always is, you know everything will be alright in the end, and if it isn't alright, well, it isn't the end yet.

Zoro

✿ He always places a comforting hand on your head when he passes by, or ends up in the same general space as you. It's his version of a hug, a reassuring touch that he is there, and that he's happy to see you. Zoro is very subtle with his affection, at least in public, but even when it's just the two of you, he automatically defaults to the head pat. It comforts him as much as it does you, and the simple action alone conveys his feelings far better than he ever could with words.

✿ You both love silently observing everything going on around you, and it's such a comfortable silence. You just enjoy each others company while watching the world go by, with Zoro also keeping an eye out for any threats, as he does. Sometimes you end up passing silent judgement on what you see, and you have both developed this uncanny ability to gossip without saying a single word. It's honestly unnerving at times, but you are just so familiar with each others micro-expressions that it's second nature.

✿ Insults are terms of endearment. If anyone else called either of you such things, all hell would break loose - swords drawn, blood spilt, bodies hit the floor, the whole song and dance. It actually started out as a form of deflection, with both of you being far too stubborn to admit any feelings were there, even to yourselves; "No, I don't like you, shitstain, I tolerate you." - "Whatever helps you sleep at night, arseface." As you connected though, it just became your thing, and you love seeing who can come up with the funniest insults. Zoro is surprisingly creative in this regard.

Nami

✿ Nami has a habit of fixing your clothes and hair if something is out of place. It can seem overbearing to others, but she knows you appreciate the gesture. She spent years putting up walls to defend herself, and this is a safe way for her to have a little moment alone with you, giving you gentle little touches without revealing to the world just how important you are to her. It is a very grounding experience for both of you, and you end up doing the same for her on the rare occasion that she isn't completely flawless. She may purposely put things out of place so you have the opportunity to fix something too.

✿ She has an eye for the finer things, and loves getting you little trinkets, and especially pieces of jewellery, which often match or pair with hers, like pendants that fit together to make a whole shape, and such. Just don't ask her where she got them; "Shhh, you don't need to worry about that." All that matters is that you now have a tangible connection to each other, no matter how close, or far apart you are.

✿ Another person who relishes in comfortable silence. Of course you love chatting with each other, and often do so later into the night than you intended. Nami is very quick-witted and your shared snark is always so enjoyable! But it's the moments when you are doing your own thing together, basking in the warmth of that closeness that brings the most joy. Every so often, you will share something interesting or amusing, depending on what you're doing, but you always return to that silence. It's very domestic.

Usopp

✿ You both end up in regular fits of giggles, that grow into raucous laughter, before devolving into the sounds of various suffocating wildlife, which only fuels the hilarious fire. He doesn't even have to say anything at times; he just has a look, and as soon as he catches your eye with it, you absolutely lose it. The amount of nonsensical inside jokes you have is absurd in itself.

✿ Ever the storyteller, Usopp will wind down the day with you relaxing under the stars, telling you fantastical stories about the impossible feats of the great 'Captain Usopp.' His creativity and imagination are something you greatly admire, and as much as you try to stay awake to appreciate those qualities, the comfort he brings has you dropping off every time. He'll carry you to bed most nights, but sometimes he can only manage to drag you around like a corpse he's trying to hide, and he'll end up waking you up laughing about it.

✿ You automatically link your little fingers whenever you are close enough to. It doesn't even register half of the time, only realising when you need that hand or try to go your separate ways. When this happens, providing there isn't anything that needs your urgent attention, you like to dramatize your parting, playing up that this is the most painful moment of your lives! "Don't you dare let go, Usopp! We can both make it out of this alive!" - "I'm so sorry, I can't hold on any longer, and I refuse to drag you down with me." - "No! Don't say that!" - "I love you so much, but you need to let me go..." Leading to you unlinking your fingers, and exaggerated fake cries of anguish. It annoys everyone around you immensely.

Sanji

✿ You shamelessly flirt with each other, making everyone around you uncomfortable, groaning at how painful it is. You weren't together when you started playing this romantic game of chicken, giving back everything Sanji threw at you, and then some, but once you figured your feelings out, you actually developed it into a legitimate game where you attempt to be as sickening and obnoxious as possible. If there is no one grimacing, angrily telling you both to pack it in, or simply leaving the room; you aren't flirting enough. There is a points system, and you're currently in the lead. Sanji ends up caving over the things you say, and his brain loses the ability to form words, let alone string them together in a coherent sentence.

✿ Sanji always leaves a drink and a bite to eat for you to wake up to, since he isn't there in person, having to wake up much earlier to prepare the food for the day. Growing up in a restaurant, early starts are just part of his natural rhythm, so it doesn't bother him, but sometimes you try to wake up with him to at least watch the sunrise together, before going back to bed for a couple more hours. He cherishes those mornings, and there is always an extra spring in his step on those days.

✿ He takes every opportunity he can to share a glance and a warm smile, a gentle touch of your hands, or a chaste kiss with you. They are agonisingly brief moments, but Sanji needs them to get him through the day, otherwise he would just cling to you, and neither of you would get anything done! Unknown to you, these moments are also his way of reminding himself that you chose him over everyone else, that he is loved unconditionally, and that he is enough, without having to, in his opinion, burden you with his insecurities. He'll open up to you one day, and you will be able to give him verbal affirmations along with everything else~

[azure-cherie]

PAC : which type of seducer are you

•1~9•

This is based on " The art of seduction" by Robert Greene

With your intuition choose a picture of Adriana Lima , you can choose multiple as well . This is based solely on my intuition however you must observe yourself more for greater accuracy . This is for entertainment purposes.

Pile 1 :

The star

The Star is almost (or completely is) of celebrity status. They, like the Natural, poses the powers of the uncanny -- specifically mixing reality and myth. The star is a dream come true. Physically present, but almost legendary and mythic in essence. They are almost too dream-like to picture in front of us. We imagine them too far out of our league, and that is what makes them so attractive.

Pile 2 :

The Dandy

The Dandy is the Siren or the Rake of the same sex. They attract the traditionally-male with psychologically masculine traits, and they attract the traditionally-female with psychologically feminine traits. They tear down the labels that society has put on sexuality and they play in all spaces. We're attracted to Dandies for their ambiguous and obscure personas, and their freedom to break prejudice sexual behavioural roles.

Pile 3 :

The Rake

The Rake is characterized as the masculine Siren. Playing on society's roles that a female character must abide by, the Rake brings out the oppressed behaviours of a traditionally-femine figure. They bring out the excited feminine in us. Again, male, female, or neutral, we're attracted to Rakes when we've been too confined and comfortable - too restrained - too neutral and unenergized in our day-to-day lives.

Pile 4 :

The natural

The Natural is a reflection of those golden years of comfort and innocent affection - childhood. They portray what both Kubrick and Freud would describe as 'uncanny'. Familiar yet strange. The Natural brings into their persona a sense of youthfulness in an adult body, drawing those that long for the times of no responsibilities, harmlessness, and naive spontaneity.

Pile 5:

The coquette

The Coquette is hot and cold. They touch and go. They attract you with hopeful words or sensual maneuvers and then step back and distance themselves from you. They entice you and frustrate you at the same time, and we're attracted to this because of our human nature to want what we can't have.

Pile 6:

The siren

The Siren is of highly charged traditionally-feminine energy and tends to attract those of a completely opposite, traditionally-masculine energy. Whether or not you identify as male, female or neither, you'll tend to be attracted to a Siren when you show characters on the extremes of traditionally-male behaviour.

Pile 7 :

The charismatic

The Charismatic is the excitement in the room. They exude confidence and energy in all the right places. They are mesmerizing and we're attracted to them because of their sincere obsessions and opinions and actions. They glow a sense of charisma with their animated gestures and fiery persuasive voice. And if they fit our values, they're just a good time to be around.

Pile 8 :

The ideal lover

The Ideal Lover comes to us from our childhood dreams, or rather our lost dreams. They are the ones that bring a hopeless fantasy to life with their ability to mirror the ideals we once had as innocent happy-go-lucky children, but have lost to grey world. They are highly astute at understanding our deepest desires and definitions of affection and bring them to fruition.

Pile 9 :

The charmer

The Charmer has almost a devilish smile you're willing to swoon over. The word "charm" comes from the Latin "carmen" -- a song or a chant that is synonymous with a magic spell. To charm is to literally cast a spell on another. The way that they do this, and the reasons we fall for them, is because they understand 3 fundamental laws of human nature: The law of narcissism, the law of defensiveness, and the law of grandiosity. It's our egos that they stroke, our vanity emotional walls that they align with, and our self-esteem that they praise.

Definitions from the website:

https://aarondanielfilms.com/blog/the-9-archetypal-lovers-you-are-attracted-to

Thank you, hope you resonate 💕

Have a great day/night ahead 😘

[renthony]

Animation (specifically 2D animation) is my preferred TV/film medium. A piece of live-action has to go above and beyond to get over my personal bias of, "most things would be better if they were animated," but it's taken me a long time to figure out what, exactly, makes a piece of live-action really do it for me.

I think what it really comes down to, for me, is the little details. If your live-action doesn't have some level of nuanced physical acting, intense detailing in costuming and set design, a strong sense of visual storytelling, or kickass practical effects, I'm pretty much always going to come away thinking, "I'd like it better as a cartoon."

I think some of this is due to my issues with face blindness--I need characters to have distinct silhouette and costuming, or they will all blur together in my head. Animation tends to stress the importance of silhouette, so I have an easier time telling everyone apart and following who's who. That's not to say that this problem doesn't happen in animation, or that it always happens in live action, but I do think it contributes to my personal preferences.

Anyway, just for fun, a random shortlist of some live-action that I think uses its medium well:

Child's Play/Chucky. Half the appeal of Chucky (IMHO) is the incredible showcase of practical effects and animatronics. Each incarnation of the Chucky doll incorporates incredible advances in animatronic and puppeteering technology. I have on multiple occasions compared the Chucky puppeteer team to Muppet performers. That shit is its own art form, and it's incredible. The current Chucky show makes some use of CGI, but it's all to enhance the practical effects, and the puppeteers are all given the spotlight in the show's credits. I love that.

Killjoys. The incredible nuance to the actors' body and facial acting is mind-blowing. The set design and costuming are gorgeous, and there's a lot of very good detail worked into the visual space that would be hard to animate. They use their CGI well when they do use it, but a significant amount of the show seems to be practical effects and props. Additionally, Hannah John-Kamen's ability to flawlessly portray multiple characters is so good it's uncanny and makes you forget they're literally being played by the same woman. She changes her entire body language, and it's phenomenal.

Jordan Peele's entire body of horror. His films pack in so much symbolism and subtlety that I could probably watch them all a million times and still find new details. The nuance in the acting, the sheer detail packed into the costuming and set design, the use of color...god. It's unreal.

Crimson Peak, because the set design for that film...holy fuck. The costuming and set design in that film are pure gold. The acting is also phenomenal, but I could probably talk about the set design for hours. The house is a character in its own right.

Galavant and Our Flag Means Death, both for the same reason: both shows feel like I'm hanging out at a ren faire being goofy with my friends. They feel like I'm watching a LARP. They feel like they could easily exist in the same setting as Muppet Treasure Island, and at any second Kermit is going to show up and start singing, and it wouldn't be out of place at all. I think I'd also include Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves in this category, along with The Princess Bride and Labyrinth--all of which also include kickass practical effects, choreography, and costuming.

This isn't some sort of objective truth or anything. I just like that I've finally been able to nail down some reasons why I prefer animation, beyond just, "idk, cartoons are fun."

[niiwa-angel]

Justice League Uncanny Valley Headcanons.

The members of the Justice League are all very uniquely trained and most of them aren't human but have to ACT human in their day to day lives. But despite them trying their best, normal humans can still tell something isn't quite right.

Clark Kent has no give to him. Superman is the Man of Steel but as Clark Kent, people find it awkward to hug him, shake his hand, or cuddle because his muscles and skin feel too tough.

Diana Prince is weirdly strong. Her coworkers struggle to move cases of artifacts because they're heavy but she has no trouble. When they ask, she always just says she knows the right way to hold things or push them but never elaborates.

Bruce Wayne is just a normal human, but he's trained himself into a weapon. His reflexes are sharper than anybody else's. Whenever he gets caught on camera catching something before anybody else, or dodging something most people couldn't, he always waves it away as "dad reflexes"

Barry Allen moves very deliberately. Every action looks like it's rehearsed and planned, yet he's twitchy when he thinks nobody is watching.

Hal Jordan spends so much time in space that it's vacuum has removed his scent. It's not something most people would notice but when they spend a lot of time with him, they get the sense that something is missing.

Arthur Curry blends in pretty well in Atlantis but in the surface, some of his Atlantean traits seem odd. His webbed feet and hands are particularly noticable. "A birth defect" he'll say and never elaborate on. Everyone else is a little nervous to ask

John Jones looks photoshopped. His features seem too semetrical, his expressions are too well done. He almost looks like an AI generated image, but he's standing in front of people, they can reach out and touch him. He's real. But his features just seem too perfect.

Clark Kent knows things before they happen. He knows when a storm is coming, he warns people about incoming hail before their weather apps even alert them. He'll look in the sky for a few minutes and eventually, everyone else will see a plane or helicopter coming from that direction. He'll ask people about their colds before they even show symptoms.

Diana Prince seems wise beyond her years. She'll tell stories from when she was younger but will never give anybody an exact age. When asked, she'll just laugh and say "older than I look" and eventually, people are too unnerved to keep pushing.

Bruce Wayne makes no noise when he walks. He's a ditzy playboy, always leaning on things, talking loudly about nothing, and he loves a good cocktail... And yet his steps make no noise. He can sneak up on people, despite his size and clumsiness. It's completely out of character and it confuses people at Galas and parties.

Barry Allen is very prone to static shock. He'll shake someone's hand and zap them, only to apologize and say he's nervous. Touching him feels like holding an overcharged battery and nobody understands it. Sometimes people's arm hair stands up around him and people have to explain it as goosebumps or the chill, because there are no other explanations.

Hal Jordan drops things a lot. Not in a clumsy way, not like "I didn't put the whole bottom of the cup on the edge of the table" kind of way. He'll just straight up let go of things he's holding. He always has some excuse. He was looking into your eyes and got lost. Someone pretty walked by. But sometimes he does it and seems just as confused as everyone else.

Arthur Curry's skin feels bumpy and cold. It's like his circulation is terrible but he never complains about a chill. When he isn't wearing a long sleeve, people notice that his skin has a weird looking texture, but some brush it off as old scars.

John Jones seems to know everything another person is about to say, even before they say it. He's answering questions that haven't been asked, only thought. "Good intuition" he'll say or "I'm a detective" but it makes people nervous.

[gh-0-stcup]

I'm gonna be honest, I really don't get the take that Daniel was saying Armand was lying about his backstory. Given the context of the scene, it seemed like a pretty clear jab at Armand's identity issues.

Daniel had just toppled a 77 year relationship built on a tower of lies. And not just lies to get out of trouble or keep Louis close - lies that Armand crafted and held onto as a preferential version of reality.

Armand wasn't just lying to manipulate, he desperately wanted to live the lie. To be the person he was portraying to Louis. To have their relationship be something different than the sad reality. If he fakes long and hard enough, eventually he'll make it. If he acts like the Good Partner well enough, eventually the harm he's done won't matter.

Armand has been trying so hard at this act that it's suffocating both him and Louis. They're weird, uncanny valley, Stepford versions of themselves in Dubai. He's trapped them in this bubble of faux kindness, faux supportiveness, masking all the resentment that lies underneath.

Armand can't confront the reasons behind his own actions to himself, let alone be honest with other people.

Armand identity is centered entirely around his role in other people's lives. He is who others see him as. He molds himself to the whims of others and has almost no concept of who he is outside of this. When the role he's inhabiting comes into conflict with the actual person he's buried deep down, it incites a breakdown. Sometimes he lashes out violently. More often, he'll gaslight or use his powers to force everything back into his preferred neat little box.

Armand is a foil for Louis in this way. Louis has also spent large portions of his life holding on to lies about himself and his relationships. But Louis does want to figure out the truth of things. He can be resistant to it because the truth tends to be more painful than self-delusion, yet he soldiers on. Louis ends the season resolving to learn to live honestly and finds empowerment through that. Armand clings to the lies and ends up alone.

So with all the context of the last two seasons and all the points made on identity and self-delusion, it seems bizarre to me that people think Daniel is saying "you lied about being raped" to Armand.

Armand, Amadeo, Arun - who are you? When did you stop living like a person and start putting on carefully crafted masks? What is real underneath all of that? Do you even know?

To me, this seems to be much more in line with what's happening in the show.

[moonlit-aura]

i think The Powers That Be (the big media) are failing to understand that not everything has to be a franchise. not every n years old piece of media needs a reboot, or a version in a different medium, a sequel or a prequel or a midquel, or a live action version.

and i think that we're seeing this at it's worst right now with things like the minecraft movie that is lacking soul enough that it makes our animal brains shriek and recoil because the uncanny valley sense lights up - but not in an 'it's a mask or a doll that's close to realistic but not close enough' way but in an 'oh my god, this is a corpse' way. it's shaped like something you love but doesn't act like it, doesn't move like it, doesn't feel like it. the main component of what made it it is missing. it's entirely money-motivated and we can tell just by looking at it, it's like a zombie.

(putting most of the post under the cut because it got like. long long. embarrassingly so.)

it just kinda feels like we're mid-stagnation of culture. original stuff just isn't being made as much anymore because it's seen as "risky" by the industry. and there isn't even any experimentation going on, just adding on things or getting rid of stuff, and the goal of all this is to make the final product more Digestible, but the side-effect is just this blandness. you're adding water and taking away the seasoning because what if it's too salty for some people, what if it's too spicy because some are more sensitive to that than others, and you end up with a vaguely tasteless sludge. nothing is gained. there's just a ghost of an aftertaste.

and the executives that mainly decide on all this want to continue doing this so much, and for the audience to be like little money-generating sheep blindly watching the same thing over and over again. but unlike sheep, we cannot regurgitate the same thing ad infinitum. we don't have the stomach for it. there's no substance and, arguably, no art in all this.

eisner was kinda onto something when he said that to make money it's necessary to make history and art, and some kind of a statement but it kinda feels like they're trying to skip this step, just keep serving us the same thing. but even the most delicious food, given enough time, gets old and boring, grows stale, and, eventually, goes bad and spoils.

i think that all that is additionally sad because it will inevitably lead to the current media cannibalizing themselves. they're already reaching for laughably young cultural texts like moana and harry potter. what will they do once they catch up to the point of history we're at right now?

[therobotmonster]

Guys I think should be in MOTU: Origins

My love of MOTU Origins is not very hidden, and they've hit tons of great points, but there's so much further to go. So, here's my rundown of what I'd want to see joint the MOTU Origins lineup.

Section 1: Give it the Sun-Man Treatment.

Blackstar

The proto-He-Man of yore, Blackstar as an IP is probably well within the price range for Mattel to sweep up to sprinkle into the line the same way Sun Man's universe was.

For advantages, it's VERY aesthetically compatible and has several strong character designs. It's no more obscure than Sun-Man, and I want hordes of those imp-demons, damnit.

BraveStarr

Again, a no-brainer. Find the character rights holders, get the rights. New Texas is out there in space, use it as an excuse to do MOTU:Origins versions of the New Adventures designs ("space travel" He-Man) and Rio-Blast. If they already own all the rights then them not having already done this is toyetic malpractice.

Advantages are obvious. BraveStarr rocks. You have a POC lead hero, Tex-Frickin'-Hex, and Thirty-Thirty, who would be well worth the extra tooling to make a deluxe figure of (you can always do an upgraded Stridor repaint). You would scatter them through waves to keep from overloading with the Space Cowboy thing, but def a winner.

Also, Rio-Blast. Rio-Blast, Yo.

Skeleton Warriors

It was never strong enough to stand on its own. Give Skeletor some friends. 'Nuff Said.

One-Off Guest Stars

This section is a little different, as these wouldn't be permanent integrations, but more fun crossover one-offs rather than being a whole theme. Characters pulled from other Mattel-owned lines of the past:

Mojo Ken and Thunderpunch Barb-E

Here's the thing. This line is dead stupid, and should remain that way. Give Ken two heads (one 'bad' Mojo head and one 80s toy Ken style one) give Barbie weirdly plausible MOTU gear, the joke alone is worth the parts reuse. Best if nestled in with some Princess of Power characters.

Lets give Captain Power a hand, folks.

Its that live action TV show that interacted with the vehicles that landed in the uncanny valley between family TV and advert-traintment that never quite works!

Captain Power and Lord Dread are pretty much the only ones you'd want to hit, maybe the Soaron Sky Sentry. And really, they're not that hard to do. Captain Power could easily be made with Roboto legs and upper arms, any number of gloved hands, a new chest armor and a new head.

Any newly tooled pieces would be useful in MOTU movie and new adventure characters.

The Construx Alien demands your respect.

I know it makes no sense, I don't care, it's my list. He's amazing and needs to be big and buff with a weird hand.

Major Matt Mason has nothing better to do.

This set's a stretch, as it would require a chunk of new tooling, but again, maybe worth it for the New Adventures and She-Ra applications, plus hey, Astronaut prequel Biff Bestman, Evelyn Powers, and Captain Marlena parts!

He-Man's space-man friend is a role that could still be filled.

Next Up... Crossover Potential.

[raaorqtpbpdy]

Creepy Carl

Danny is not fond of his parents' old ghost hunting friend that's come to pay them a visit for the week.

For the prompts: Jack and Maddie invite an old ghost hunting buddy (not Vlad) to stay in their guest room for the week. Expecting to catch up with their good ole pal, they're a little confused when this ghost hunter just keeps asking questions about their son, Danny [from @ectoblastfromthepast], and After the accident, Danny no longer has a shadow, and he isn't the first person to notice its absence. [from TheSilentBard]

Fair warning, Danny calls the old ghost hunting buddy 'Creepy Carl' for a reason. It may not be sexual in any way, but he is still very much creeping on a child, and I think y'all should be aware of that going in.

Read also on AO3

[Warning for uncanny valley elements, and (non-sexual) inappropriate behavior by an adult toward a minor]

How many 'old ghost hunting buddies' did his parents have? Danny wondered as they introduced them to one Anderson Carl. First Vlad, and now this guy?

Apparently, after college and before Jazz was born, the two of them had gone on many a ghost hunt with Mr. Carl. Now, he had his own paranormal investigation blog with a pretty decent readership, and he had come to Amity Park to do a piece on the town, which of course meant he needed a place to stay in town while he was doing research.

Luckily, he had a couple of old buddies with a guest room who happened to live right where the action was, and when he told them he was coming to town, they eagerly invited him to stay in said guest room for the whole week he was planning to stay. They thought it would be a great chance to catch up with their good ole pal, but Danny was wary the second he laid eyes on the man.

Anderson Carl wasn't as tall as Jack, as hardly anyone was, but he still loomed over Danny at a solid six feet tall, probably a few inches taller than that. He had close-cropped, dirty blond hair, and dark gray eyes like angry storm clouds, they even seemed to light up with electric curiosity as Danny watched the man, and the man also watched him.

"Welcome to Fenton Works," Maddie greeted him cheerfully. "That's our son, Danny. Our daughter Jazz is out tutoring right now, but she'll be back in a few hours."

"Nice to meet you, Danny," Mr. Carl said, and smiled.

The smile was perfectly ordinary, but Danny couldn't help feeling a sinister chill when it was directed at him. Maybe it was to too-white teeth, or the way it stretched his chapped lips so tightly they looked like they might crack, but Danny didn't like it.

"Uh... sure," Danny said cautiously. "Sorry, but I've got homework to do, so I'm gonna go."

He could feel those dark eyes following him all the way up the stairs, and when he closed his bedroom door behind him, he felt like Mr. Carl couldn't be leaving town soon enough. A whole week of this already sounded unbearable.

The next morning, when Danny got dressed and left for school, Mr. Carl was already awake, and sitting at the kitchen table, typing on his laptop. The laptop, too, was a dark grey, but it had a sticker on it that said UncannyCarl.com in bright red letters designed to look like they were partially obscured by smoke.

"Good Morning, Danny," the man greeted, with that same unsettling smile from the day before. "Off to school?"

"Yeah, it's Monday, so..." Danny trailed off. He took an orange out of the bowl on the counter for breakfast, not taking his eyes of the man before him. "Is that your blog, Mr. Carl?" he asked. "Uncanny Carl dot com?"

"That's right," the man confirmed. "Uncanny is something of a synonym for paranormal, but really the name is based on... are you familiar with the uncanny valley effect?"

"Never heard of it," Danny said.

"The uncanny valley effect is when you see something that looks human in most respects, but it's just slightly off enough to make your brain send out warning signals that it's not human, and you shouldn't be fooled by it," Mr. Carl explained. "Often times, you aren't consciously aware of what detail your brain registers as wrong that's causing the uncanny valley effect, whether it's that their arms are just slightly too long, the shape of their face is abnormal, or they don't have a shadow. Your brain notices it, even if you don't."

Danny couldn't help thinking that this guy was a little uncanny valley himself, but he thought it would be rude to say out loud, and he didn't want to piss off his parents' creepy guest.

"That's fascinating Mr. Carl, but I gotta get to school."

"Oh, and you can drop the 'Mr', by the way," he said. "Everyone just calls me Carl, even though it's my last name. In school, people used to joke that my parents must've but my name backwards on my birth certificate."

Danny just furrowed his eyebrows, shook his head, and left the kitchen, along with Creepy Carl, behind him as he headed out the front door to school.

Between classes, he caught Sam and Tucker up on his new house guest.

"Great, because all you need is another ghost hunter living under your roof," Sam said sardonically.

"I know, right?" Danny agreed. "At least this one's only staying until Saturday, but he's already creeping me out. I feel like he's constantly watching me whenever we're both in a room together. It's weird."

"Do you think he noticed something about you?" Tucker asked. "I mean, you don't know anything about this guy. What if he's actually a better ghost hunter than your parents?"

"It's not hard to be," Sam scoffed.

Danny ignored her, choosing instead to answer Tucker's question. "I'm not sure, but... maybe? He was talking about something called the uncanny valley effect, which he explained as being able to recognize when something that looked human wasn't, I guess. Something like that, anyway. He was just explaining the name of his blog, but he might've meant it as a warning that he was onto me.

"If you ask me, he's the uncanny valley one, though."

—

Jack and Maddie had been excited to show their old friend around their (relatively) new lab, especially the Fenton Ghost Portal. Carl seemed suitably interested in all of it, and he listened as they caught him up on their lives since he'd parted ways with the couple, but the whole time he seemed a bit... distracted.

Back when they were fresh college graduates, Carl had been an eager note-taker, his pencil hardly stilling on the pad of yellow lined paper he always carried with him. But now, he was hardly taking any notes at all. Even when he was staring at the portal between this world and the next, he only scribbled down a few sentences before twirling his pencil idly between his fingers.

They asked him about what he'd been up to since they last saw him, and he told them, but he was remarkably brief. He mentioned that he'd gone solo for a bit before deciding to start a blog, and he'd been running that ever since, writing the occasional opinion piece for local newspaper to get some supplemental income.

He'd finished talking about himself in under a minute, and even when asked, he didn't seem keen to elaborate on any particular investigation of his over the last sixteen years. All he said was that they could read about it all on his blog.

That wasn't the end of his strange behavior, because the next thing he asked about was Danny.

Jack and Maddie were of course very eager to brag about their kids, especially Jazz, but when they started to do so, Carl said they were getting off track, and he was really curious about Danny.

He asked them how old Danny was, if he was at all reclusive, or short-tempered, if they'd ever noticed him acting particularly odd or cagey.

They answered of course, seeing no reason not to. Carl was their friend after all, and they trusted that he didn't have any bad intentions when it came to their son—and if he did, they wouldn't hesitate to beat his ass and hand him over to the police—but surely he didn't. They were still confused though. Especially because, since the conversation turned to Danny, Carl's pencil hadn't stopped moving even once.

"What's with all the questions about Danny?" Jack asked. "I thought you came here to investigate ghosts."

"Oh, no real reason," Carl replied with a casual shrug. "Just... a bit of a hunch. I won't bother you with it unless I happen to find proof." Then he asked, "Have you even noticed that the air feels colder around Danny, or that standing next to him gives you an uncomfortable buzzing sensation under your skin?"

It was a odd question... but even odder was that neither Jack nor Maddie were actually sure of the answer. They worked with ghosts all the time so of course they felt sensations like that, but... neither could remember if they'd felt them around Danny... nor could they say for sure that they hadn't.

As Carl continued his line of questioning, a feeling of disquiet settled in on top of their confusion. After a point, they asked if he might want to hear about some of the recent ghost incidents around town, rather than just spending all day talking about their fourteen-year-old son.

Carl looked at them in silence for a moment, his eyes narrowed as if he might challenge them and insist. But then his lips quirked up in a smile, and he agreed to the subject change without resistance.

It wouldn't be the last time he asked about Danny that week though. He would stop, when asked, but by and by, the topic of Danny would always come up again, and when they told him about Danny's accident with the Fenton Portal a few months before, he seemed particularly intrigued.

—

It had been three days since Creepy Carl took up residence in the Fenton guest room, and Danny could confidently say that he hated the guy. He'd suspected as much from day one, but now that it was Wednesday, Danny had confidently confirmed that Creepy Carl almost never looked away from Danny when the two of them were in the same room, and it was seriously freaking Danny out.

At home, Danny was spending almost all his time in his bedroom to avoid running into the guy. Unfortunately, his bedroom shared a wall with the guest room, and just knowing the guy was right on the other side of the wall was causing Danny to lose sleep.

Still, Creepy Carl never did anything more than just watch him. At least, not until very late Friday night, or very early Saturday morning. Danny never did know which was more correct. His discomfort proved to be well founded when, around one in the morning that night, he awoke to a bright light being shined on his face.

Danny put a hand up to block the light and sat up to see what was causing it.

He wasn't sure if she should be surprised or not when he made out the silhouette of Anderson Carl shining a flashlight directly at his face. Danny was pretty sure his bedroom door had been locked. Ever since Carl started staying the room next door, Danny had been making sure to lock it. Obviously that had been a futile endeavor.

"What the hell, Carl?" Danny groaned. "Just... just what the hell?"

"What are you?" Creepy Carl asked creepily.

"What do you mean what am I? I'm a freshman."

"A freshman without a shadow?"

"What?"

"Look behind you?"

Danny was hesitant to take his eyes off the creep in front of him, but curiosity got the better of him and he turned.

On the wall behind him was a circle of light from Carl's flashlight. For a moment, Danny didn't register what he was supposed to be seeing, then as the tiredness in his brain started to lift slightly, he realized. He was supposed to be seeing his shadow behind him.

It wasn't there.

He snapped his head back around to look at Carl, and jumped with a start when he realized that the man had taken several steps closer to Danny's bed when he wasn't looking, in absolute silence, and without any movement of the flashlight in his hand. He was now knelt next to the bed, scrutinizing Danny with wide eyes.

"What are you?" Carl repeated.

He was close enough now that Danny could feel the warmth of his breath and lurched backwards in vague disgust and alarm.

"Uncanny Valley, right?" Danny said. "You would know better than I would. What are you?"

Danny had thought that Carl wasn't moving, but then he suddenly froze, and Danny realized the still he'd been a moment ago had been jittery and trembling, but the still he was no was statuesque and cold. He said nothing, and narrowed his eyes like he wasn't sure if he should, or if he should keep holding his cards close to his chest.

"I'll be honest, I never actually noticed I didn't cast a shadow until you pointed it out," Danny admitted. "But I've noticed plenty of uncanny valley around you."

"Like what?" Carl asked, though his tone didn't carry any doubt, just curiosity.

"Like... your smile is wrong. You teeth are too straight, and too white. Kinda like a TV news anchor, except I'm pretty sure there are too many of them." Danny saw Carl run his tongue over his teeth like he was counting them. Then he added, "And also, your lips are all cracked and gross, which isn't uncanny valley, but it is weird that you'd take such good care of your teeth and not even bother with some lip balm."

"Is that all?"

"Your eyes are weird, too," Danny continued. "Nobody's eyes are that color, and even if they were, they wouldn't spark like yours do, just tiny flashes of light. Human eyes don't do that. And your skin is too thin, I think, because your veins and stuff are all weirdly visible, even though you're not that pale."

Carl nodded slowly.

"And... how many teeth are people supposed to have?" he asked.

"I dunno," Danny said with a shrug. "I think, like, thirty, thirty-two, somewhere around there."

"Thanks for the tip," Carl said. "Your eyes flash, too, you know. Bright green. When your emotions are running high."

"Yeah, I know. I've been working on that."

"You're really not going to tell me, are you?" Carl stood, evidently resigned to not getting an answer. "I know you're not a human, and I know you're no ordinary ghost. You sure you won't even give me a hint?"

Danny gave him a derisive snort. "Will you?"

"No, I suppose not." Carl smiled then, and though it was dark, Danny could almost swear the number of teeth in his mouth had changed. "I guess we'll both just have to suffer in disappointment. Goodnight, Danny."

With that, he turned around and walked out of the room, not waiting for an answer.

Danny got up and went to check his door, to see if Carl had broken the lock to get in or something.

Not only was it not broken, it was still locked. Danny had seen the door open and close. He'd heard the doorknob twist. But it had somehow remained locked the whole time.

"Goodnight, Creepy Carl," Danny whispered.

He went back to bed, but didn't get a wink of sleep.

Creepy Carl left the following afternoon, much to Danny's relief.

He hoped that he would never have to see the man again, but somehow, he had a feeling he would. Someday, somewhere... when he least expected it.

[fizzingwizard]

Why I like Cats (the musical) 2024 version

Cats the Musical's smash success in the 80s stunned everyone, including those who made it. But despite the critics claiming it's baffling and has no plot, it was popular anyway. And remained popular. For years.

"But why?" shriek the naysayers even now, decades later, in broad daylight, because they've never met a real Cats fan, and frankly don't believe they exist, and the massive audiences of yore which attended the shows in London, New York, Tokyo etc were paid actors contributing to the farce that is Cats the Musical. Or maybe they assume every furry dutifully attends every performance of Cats as some kind of furry confirmation ritual.

Now that we've seen the Hooperian nightmare that is Cats 2019, internationally recognized as a pre-pandemic harbinger of doom and torment, making fun of Cats is more fun than ever.

But no pedantic Youtube critic will ever pry Cats (THE MUSICAL) out of my fierce, feline clutches! No! I won't let you! Not even you, Tom Hooper! You don't need opposable thumbs to be irrationally devoted to old-ass musicals from the 80s!

Anyway here's why I like Cats (the musical)!

Wicked whimsical fun times!!

Cats is the fun uncle at the family New Year's party. He's young, he's confusingly hot-yet-not, he gets around, he always smells faintly of weed. He's down for anything and somehow gives off chill vibes while also exuding the barely restrained energy of an ostrich mating dance. He doesn't have a job. No one knows what he does on a regular, non-party day. Maybe he just... ceases to exist. You like him, without knowing or caring whether there's anything about him to like.

A celebration of dance!!

Tap, jazz modern ballet, gymnastics! There's even a trapeze! Cats has it all... as long as it was popular among white audiences in the 80s, anyway. Attempts to diversify have been hit and miss. But since many of the dance styles have fallen out of popularity, it's refreshing, in a way, to go to a Cats show and see a guy in an orange unitard tap dancing passionately. Like teleporting into a bygone age of the catpeople. Heck, even in the clusterfuck that was the 2019 movie, Skimbleshanks stole the show.

Jokes aside, the loose story structure isn't just because no one on staff knew how to plot anything, it highlights the performances themselves: dance and music are central to Cats, which is part of why making a film version is so damn hard. You can't just say no thanks to the choreography or interrupt the songs for dumb bratty quips (Hooper!!). That's what this musical is.

Yes, they are cats, and it's cool, not freaky. (But also freaky)

The costumes and makeup are for a stage show. They're overdone on purpose to have an impact from far away. It's due to that distance that the actors can seem pleasantly cat-like without appearing like they're doing this under hypnosis. That's another reason why translating Cats to a live action movie is kinda doomed to fail. With movies you're too up close. Welcome to the Uncanny Valley, hope you survive your stay!

The costumes are also very 80s. They have changed... but not all that much. If you know glam metal and punk rock then you probably cotton on to the references and why a lot of the old pictures look like a hair band's photo shoots. Young fans may not be aware of those roots and just accept the wigs and the color schemes and the setting as a whim. But the truth is undeniable. The 80s live on!

Much of the dance is choreographed to reflect feline, seemless movement. The actors spend their down time on stage mimicking relaxed cat behaviors, including the cute and clumsy ones that made Youtube rich. But they don't forget that they are actually humans any more than the audience does, or that getting too into it would be pretty weird. How well it works for you probably has a lot to do with whether or not you like Cats the musical. It's not supposed to be realistic or freaky. Just evocative and atmospheric.

Except the orgy. That simply Is. Sex through ballet. In unitards.

The stage!

The stage is a huge draw for seeing Cats live. There's so much detail and fun things to spot. It's a junkyard! Cats pop out of the strangest places! Honestly it's so impressive that it makes the way Old Deut magically reappears under a blanket rather more noticeably lackluster... (I did really enjoy the way the Broadway revival revamped that bit with the dark and the hand-held light dance)

You've seen it once, you've seen it twice, you still haven't seen it

The legend of Cats is that no two performances are the same. You can go to the same theater with the same cast night after night and spot subtle changes. Because the characters aren't that important overall, there aren't real relationships to interrupt by letting someone be friends with someone else in one show, and ignore each other in another. The most fun comes with watching the actors not currently center stage, who can do whatever they want. They're always moving, darting here and there, interacting with each other in an unobstrusive way. It's like a treasure hunt to work out whch cats are friends, which are rivals, who has a crush on who, heck, who's a grown cat and who's still a kitten, depending on the performance. I love this pliable approach, it gives the play a sense of living and changing.

Electric guitar!!!

Like, it's par for the course these days. Nothing unusual. Even so, I always lose my shit at that electric guitar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There IS a story!! There is!!

It's just not the most important part. Or even the second most important. Possibly not even the third most... yeah.

One thing worth noting is that the vibe of the musical has changed a lot of over the years. Most versions in the US and UK still retain some of the original grungy, gritty, patchwork aesthetic. A lot of it has been cleaned up and polished. The Japanese version (the only non-English version I've seen live) is almost like a Disney story imo. But thanks to the costumes, characters, and stage setting, it feels less like the 80s have gone than the 80s have been reinterpreted into modern preferences. I really enjoyed the 2016 Broadway revival for example, although I know some fans didn't.

All that to say the story which we fans have more or less pieced together ourselves has evolved over the years, and isn't super official. But it is regular. Hooper's movie doesn't get credit for giving Cats a plot, it already had one, just told in a not especially coherent way. That incoherence, despite being panned by everyone and especially their dog, I think is one of the best parts of Cats. You get to leave the show feeling like you missed nothing, then see it again and notice something new, and then leave feeling like you missed nothing. Rinse and repeat. The perfect show =)

Now about that plot.

The Jellicle Cats assemble once a year to have an orgy a ball. They're so happy to see each other and they just have so much to catch up, plus the kittens only opened their eyes like last week so they need a whole run-down of who all these older guys are. We meet the maternal cat, the storyteller cat, the railway cat, the twin thief cats, the excitable cat, the magical cat, the Jagger cat. They're all kind of sort of in competition to win a new life (cats have nine you know) by being chosen to go to the Heavyside Layer. Not that they compete - they all just want, vaguely, with a sort of existential soul-deep yearning for something too ineffable to define. This contrast of the transient with the permanent, the fleeting with the eternal, is introduced early in the show, when the cats tell us they have two names: a name they're called by on a daily basis, and a secret name that is wholly and uniquely their own. These themes continue throughout scenes of the actors grooming each other's fur and panting in bisexual lust due to sexy Tugger's sexy hip thrusts. It's deep bro. Gets me right here, bro.

Meanwhile there's an outcast called Macavity who is Bad, but most of the sightings of him are false alarms. He doesn't show up properly till near the end of the second act and there's a whole cat fight, it's awesome, I love picking out which cats stay to fight and which run away. He abducts Old Deut, the patriarch, and the only chance the cats have to get him back is Mister Mistoffelees, who depending on the performance is kind of clumsy and insecure, or really effing amazeballs at magic. I prefer the first because it makes more sense why Rum Tum Tugger sings his song for him (old versions have Mister Mistoffelees singing at least part of his song). Then Old Deut's back and now it's time for the Heavyside Layer!

Meanwhile meanwhile, there's Grizabella, who is haunting the Jellicle Ball with much more tangible yearning. She's washed up, a has-been. She can't dance anymore. No one trusts her. Why? Idk, people are just like that. The other cats fear Macavity, who represents destruction and chaos, but they look down on Grizabella, who is failure and regret and mortality. For whom all the broken dreams could be forgotten if she could join just one more dance. Defeating Macavity isn't the Jellicles ultimate test - accepting Grizabella is.

ETA: I feel like I didn't quite get across why this is so important. The show spends so much time building up our dread of Macavity, but sightings of Grizabella leave us feeling wrong-footed and uncomfortable. And the reason is: Macavity is destruction, but Grizabella is destroyed. A grizzled beauty - someone with no more life left in them. She's a vision of a grim future which the Jellicles want to reject. She's been made small and weak and pathetic. So they blame her for her situation, because then they can go on with their ball without all that discomfort. And they don't just decide to redeem her in the end - first, Grizabella has to sing "Memory." Grizabella needs to tell the Jellicles "There was a time before I experienced destruction too, when I didn't know how happy I was." The only thing which keeps that spark in her alive is the memory of it, and it's that which makes her the chosen candidate to go the Heavyside Layer. A threat like Macavity, while very scary, is mortal and temporary. But Grizabella's ability to look back on her life and find the happiness in it, and reach out to the others while on death's door, despite the risk of harsh rejection, speaks to something eternal. And the Jellicles have a choice whether they will show acceptance for that full course of life.

Then up she goes via the Stairway to Heaven and who knows what happens to her after that. Idgaf really, ask the Everlasting Cat. And then we sing a song about how great cats are because it's true. I mean come on. Shakespeare would write this.

Um wait up... plot holes???

Wait - why did Macavity kidnap Old Deut in the first place though? This is pretty unexplored backstory. Generally fans assume Macavity torments the Jellicles on the regular, and that he did something to Demeter in the past, which is why she's often depicted as the most skittish when he's mentioned. He's a bad egg - his song details enough - and also he's got his paws in the community, thanks to Griddlebone and Mungojerrie.

OK, so not knowing what his motivation is, as well as not knowing why Mungojerrie, who is fairly lovable despite being a thief, is involved with him, is kind of a big plot hole. It'd be nice to know that right? It'd be nice to know what happened to Grizabella - did she leave the Jellicles by choice, did she shun and reject them before she went off on her own? What did these characters do leading up to the events of the show?

This is what defines the True Cats Fan. The True Cats Fan not only doesn't know the official answers to these questions (there aren't any, shut up Hooper), but PREFERS them that way. Number one, it turns the show into a single evening suspended in time. We are voyeurs - guests come to witness the holy day of the catpeople. We are foreigners. We don't understand everything we see because we are not one of them. "What's a Jellicle Cat?" The cats are stunned that we don't know, but can't explain it to us in full either. A Jellicle Cat doesn't need it explain. They always know. So the story is what it is, you know what you know, and what you don't, well, it's not inconsequential, but it is for tomorrow. And tomorrow isn't today, that's the thing.

Number two is that the True Cats Fan doesn't want these questions answered because... we'd rather answer them ourselves!

LAST. The fan lore rocks!

Cats is just so much fun to fan girl in. Because the canon is so whatever, we can come up with our own ideas about backstory and relationships, and when we go to the next show, it's gleeful fun to see what elements of pure director's whim support our fan theories. If you're not interested in headcanons or fan theories you can leave now, here's your certificate, now you know what Cats fans love about the musical Cats. If you're a true freak, read on!

A lot of these are influenced by the 1998 DVD because that was the most accessible way to watch Cats (the musical). But the best ones have roots in any show canon, or extrapolate from like, a single lyric. Making sense of the nonsense without committing to getting rid of the nonsense, because we love nonsense. Also these DON'T all go together, they are independent headcanons, otherwise some of them would be really Not Good hahaha.

OK, so Old Deut is everyone'd dad. BUT, he's particularly dad of Munkustrap, Macavity, and Rum Tum Tugger. Sometimes in that order, sometimes not. This is hilarious to me. I love the idea that Munk and Tugger are brothers and that's why they drive each other batty. And who doesn't love a secret third brother who is als evil, or prodigal son who kidnaps his own father?

Demeter was Macavity's girlfriend before he got kicked out, or sometimes she went with him and came back once she realized he lost his marbles. She's been traumatized by him and that trauma is even choreographed or her. There's behind the scenes video, I think it's from the 1998 DVD, where they explain that, so it's rather more than a theory. She often has a role in the fight scene - an actual fighting role, rather than a cowering one. Now Demeter is Munkustrap's mate, which, if you accept the "Munkustrap/Tugger/Macavity are brothers" theory, makes for all kinds of juicy drama.

Victoria is Plato's girlfriend. Victoria is Mistoffelees's sister. Victoria is Mistoffelees's girlfriend. Victoria is Munkustrap's girlfriend??? Take your pick lol.

Victoria can't speak and/or is deaf and that's why she communicates through dancing.

Demeter and Bombalurina are sisters

Sillabub/Jemima is Munkustrap's daughter (ok...).

Munkustrap is the Jellicle leader of sorts. Old Deut is the real leader, but he's old y'know. And Munkustrap is kinda sorta his son. But Munk doesn't do a lot of leaderly things. He disciplines sometimes and controls the kittens, and he fights in the battle scene. But mostly he sings songs and tells stories. So there's a headcanon that Munk has reservations about being Old Deut's successor and wishes he could just tell stories all the time. So wholesome...

Rum Tum Tugger is a bi disaster and Mister Mistoffelees is his twink boyfriend. Gay cats, they're gay, it's theater, it's a show about cats with a cat orgy, did you really expect different? Now although I make fun I am into it. Tugger, brash and vain yet insecure, and Mistoffelees, insecure with inner pride. In some shows older cats like Skimbleshanks and Gus will be shown trying to lead Mistoffelees away from Rum Tum Tugger during his song, as if concerned by their promising, talented young friend's interest in the local Bad Boy. Mistoffelees's real talent humbles Tugger, and Tugger's audaciousness enables Mistoffelees to take risks. Thus the day is saved! Tugger and Mistoffelees weren't always a set on stage - it could be Mistoffelees and Munkustrap as the two leads, or why Tugger sings Mistoffelees's song would just go without explanation. But these days it's a popular enough duo that it's become fairly regular. And the 2016 actors put Tugger/Misto fan art on the wall in their dressing room therefore it is Canon.

Skimbleshanks and Jennyanydots are a couple, inspired by the way he teases her during the Gumbie Cat song

Skimbleshanks is a DILF

Grizabella was Old Deut's girlfriend x'D or is Macavity's mother or something. Personally I don't need this theory lol we've already got enough overlapping relationships to write twelve soap operas so.

Cats with collars are house cats, cats without are strays. Not super reliable but fun to think about.

Some cats aren't named, or have different names depending on the country or decade. These cats can have some really, really dedicated fans whose personal headcanons about these completely undeveloped characters are ironclad.

Asparagus and Gus are father and son. This is to explain why the actor who plays Asparagus is always around, and called Gus/Asparagus, and then for Theater Cat and Growltiger he seems much older but is still called Gus. It's the same actor in slightly different costumes but fans just pretend there's two characters to explain it.

Same thing with Admetus/Plato, who doubles as Macavity in the 1998 DVD, and in many stage performances as well. Macavity is Plato's evil alter ego, but he's in love with Victoria so he doesn't want anyone to know. Or he's not even aware that he is Macavity. A Jekyll and Hyde sort of deal.

Mistoffelees is Macavity's son and that's why he can do magic. (Ergo why Macavity can make Old Deut disappear and Mistoffelees can make him reappear).

Alonzo was Munkustrap's gay fling in college so to speak. Or Alonzo is Munkustrap's half-brother

Coricopat and Tantomile are psychic twins (almost canon) and coach Sillabub/Jemima because she sings really pretty when she's in a trance and seems to Know Ineffable Stuff. In fanfics they're often depicted as not liking Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, which is kinda funny because I guess I would have thought twins on twins would have been The Thing, lol.

Griddlebone was Gus's wife and sometimes Jellylorum's mom. She's evil, independently of Macavity, but also in cahoots with him because song lyrics. ETA: Also that she's Grizabella when she was young!

There's a cat just called George who everyone loves. He's an ensemble cat with no particulars. Love George. Worship George.

Look there's like ninety seven thousand characters in Cats (the Musical) and three times as many headcanons. I'm leaving a lot out but I can't remember any more right now and I gotta go make dinner.

[rei-ismyname]

The X-Men vs X-Men Beef feels inorganic

From The Ashes has begun in earnest, and we're being told that the Uncanny X-Men have irreconcilable problems with Cyclops' X-Men. However, we're not really being shown that. Spoilers for all From The Ashes books released so far.

We've had 3 issues of X-Men and 2 of Uncanny X-Men so far, plus answers promised for why Wolverine doesn't want to be one in the first issue of his solo (the reason is trauma, it turns out but he's still wearing his uniform ten pages in. Not especially satisfying.) From The Ashes (henceforth FTA) has had a scattershot approach to plotting so far, but one unifying theme has been that mutants in general are a scattered diaspora as well as interpersonal issues that I'm just not seeing.

Here's Gail at the end of Uncanny X-Men #1.

Let's break this down a bit. 'Recovering from grief' absolutely makes sense. They lost Krakoa only months ago and different people deal with that in different ways. Except Rogue seems pretty happy tbh, aside from select moments when the Big Picture is being discussed. The rest of the time she's talking loudly about sex and generally seems in high spirits.

'Rogue and Cyclops has replaced the relationship between Xavier and Magneto.' For one, that relationship has been a close one for years at this point. Secondly, I'm not buying that at all because it's not on the page.

They seem to be on great terms here, working together for mutual goals. Zero animosity. Friends, family, obviously. Why wouldn't they be? This is issue 1.

This is issue 2, like 6 hours later in universe. The Jubilee comment confirms they're sharing information, and Scott's team are very publicly being X-Men. The reader doesn't have perfect information here, but obviously these kids have said something that spurs Rogue into action immediately, fuck Scott/Hank/everyone else's plans.

Here's the moment just before the call. 'Last guy I want to talk to.' What the hell is that about? It's very at odds with either phone call, which were friendly and collaborative. As you'd think they'd be, you know having been family for decades now.

'Are there even going to be X-Men anymore?' You know there are, you're working with them. 'We almost had Xavier's 'dream'. No, you didn't. You had a nation, and it was great. It was the opposite of The Dream, because the Dream is solving bigotry. You should all know this by now. Also, aren't you all super mad at Chuck for his war crimes? I know Wolverine tried to kill him a few months ago - is he over that?

They discuss heading up to join Cyclops, in the former sentinel factory given as part of a settlement for six months of torture and being readied for a Kangaroo court and execution - you were all there for that. 'Imagine a community run by Scott Summers... I ain't going back there, it ain't the X-Men...'

Dude, you've been living with him, Jean and their family for the past 4 years in a polycule. Why are you talking like you're Schism era Wolverine? Your beef is ancient history, you're family. He definitely wasn't 'everywhere you turn' when you were banging his wife. Y'all are about to go break into a government sanctioned prison to retrieve your war criminal mentor that one of you tried to kill very recently - so I'm not seeing a difference in methodology or ideology. In fact you're doing that and he's compromising his team's plans around you!

Here's Scott's side of that conversation. Looks like she hung up on him for some reason, but this dude is being polite and trying to collaborate with his peers. When he gets hung up on and ignored he changes his plans, with the primary concern being everyone's safety. There's nothing in any of these issues indicating otherwise, aside from Logan shooting down anything to do with Scott and Gail Simone kinda saying so in editorial.

So why is this conflict happening? Logan has been running naked with wolves since Krakoa (despite being in ten different books) so there's been no opportunity for an incident. Everyone else is talking like they're friends. Sure, there's the grief and trauma, but everyone is making 'back to work' choices. I'm definitely not seeing an ideological divide, just being told that in editorial.

Even Kitty Pryde is telling everyone to fuck off, except we know she's in Exceptional X-Men on a team. Little hard to believe she'd turn away from all her family, except Emma Frost. Their relationship was in a good place on Krakoa, but why a team with her and refuse to even see anyone else?

It's really not that hard to give characters goals and beliefs, and ideas on the best way to achieve them. At the moment it just feels like they're apart because writers/editorial want them to be, while giving us the kind of disagreements teenagers would get over quickly. I'm not feeling it as a good start to FTA, and the implication that 'we're the X-Men now' implies Scott's team isn't. We've been here before, idiot plots leading to needless divides amongst a people in severe crisis. I have to ask - is that really the best Marvel can do?

I really want to like or even love this reboot, but nostalgia and forced conflict is the definition of old hat. There's so many ways to use nostalgia in fresh ways, but this isnt it. Worse, I'm being told otherwise. I know you don't hire Tom Brevoort as editor to take risks, so I'm really hoping this is just a slow start with everyone finding their feet.

I've definitely noticed that Magneto has been sitting in a chair doing nothing for 3 issues too. I want to know how his ideological awakening is going to be paid off, and I'm wary it's just going to be ignored. I'll be coming back to this topic when there's actually something to talk about, and perhaps foolishly being cautiously optimistic.

Maybe this kind of stuff isn't for everyone, but at least make it make sense, yo. How are you finding it? What are you loving? What are you looking forward to? I'd love to hear.