#but theres still like three more weeks of this shit

[clonewarsahsoka]

I WANNA GO HOMEEEEEE

[the-kipsabian]

i was having a pretty good day and then i was made to look at school applying stuff again since its that time of the year and now i have heightened anxiety and i want to curl up and cry :)

[thetangibleghost]

some genuinely useless, but very specific information about my system

Okay so confession time that everyone already knows: Friday is a fictive of Sally Face.

He very, like.... Well rounded though? And a lot of it doesn't really fit with canon. Cause you know. System. So I started calling him Friday. In the headspace he still kind uses Sally Face though. EXEPT. He's a subsystem???????????????

I still don't... Understand how subsystems really work if I'm being frank. And esp not subsystems from introjects?

There's also the added complication that he is 100% convinced that he exists in meat space and we're just psychicly linked. This isn't that much of an issue short term other then it makes getting info about like why he exists difficult.

So he's a subsystem I've met five of his alters? He said "my psychiatrist told me there's 28. But I only know four."

And then I met one he hadn't met before and told him about them.

And idk I think this is so like. Interesting and he gave me permission to share this on Tumblr despite absolutely despising that I'm on Tumblr so much so I gotta take advantage of the opportunity.

So there's Sally Face (host), Sally (persecutor/protector 🫶🏻/EP), Sal (teen part. ANP), Face (EP), and another persecutor who I've only met once.

Sally seems to have alright communication and some power to move around in the system, while Sally Face knows almost nothing, blacks out pretty much everytime. They're never co-fronting. Except recently Sally Face said he's got more communication with Face.

I asked him why he names them like this, and also that he's literally out of names now and his retort was "well why don't you just number yours?"

So anyway.

Sally face has fronted before, but the others havn't

My main road block rn is that I understand how they alters came about within the context of the videogame? But I have no fucking clue how they would apply to the systems life?

Larry, Ash, and Todd are also around? Sally's been front stuck for like 6 months. And Larry's been front stuck for three weeks. So. It's the three of us. Round the clock party. Sometimes someone else shows up from "my system" or from the game.

They all really encourage the Truman show delusion that most of the system has 🤦🏻. They also support Another Delusion that I can't even talk about.

Sometime, I'll admit, I find my self slipping and talking like they do exist somewhere out in meat space but I think that's just because that's how they talk?

The dream I had last night was kinda eye opening like. I'm not running towards something... I think I'm running away. And they're like guiding me. And as annoying as it is that they all insist that they exist it's like. Probably a good thing? Like I probably can't process what they're protecting me from.

So. Idk this doesn't really have a point. It's just... Unusual. I feel like.

[steampoweredskeleton]

.

Ignore

[verystressedcollegestudent]

if there's one thing i hate more than slackers in group projects its goddamn hypocrites

[artsninspo]

"FLAGS? CRIMSON 🚩" - RIO X READER

Authors Note: Monday Morning 🍵 , this one is based around the asks, the girls wanted filthy rio, I tried 😘

Summary: You have your concerns and reservations. Rio doesn't give a damn ... usually but then you stand on business, staying away for two weeks. Rio doesn't like that and lets his presence be known.

Pairing: Rio (Good Girls) X Black Reader

Warnings: Spicy🌶️🌶️🌶️, theres possessiveness, stalking?, hair grabbing, mild-spanking & dub-con elements.

Word-Count: 2.5K

Full Masterlist

RIO MASTERLIST

You and Rio have been in a standoff for the past three weeks. It started with him snatching your phone out of your hand as you attempted to take a picture of the two of you. He’d wined and dined you after a busy work week. He had his place turned into a restaurant to hold the intimate date. How often does a girl get Michelin grade food with a side of five star dick? Rio was something new, he chased you mercilessly but there was never that ��let me show you off’ phase that you’re typically used to. There were no meetings or greetings from friends or family.  You were excited for a relationship that was private but you didn’t sign up to be a secret. You already made it clear to him that you wanted to know if he was sleeping with other people. You’d asked him countless times if he was seeing someone else, secretly married, everything. Each time Rio’s been dismissive, more present and somehow better in bed to prove his point. It was only you. Still your suspicions beat out every single affirmation of his. As good as it’s been physically, the flags are crimson.

Swallowing hard you make your way to the country club for tonight’s benefit. Your phone rings again. Rio’s name flashes and you respond with another customer service-esque response, that delays your meeting citing being busy and exhausted as the reason. At first Rio was giving you time to cool off but now he’s relentless. If you were the only one perhaps his hand just isn't cutting it anymore. Rubbing shoulders isn’t typically your favourite thing to do but socialising is better than sitting at home and forcing yourself not to think of him. you see a few childhood friends among the opportunists and the schmoozes that frequent this kind of social climber opportunity. You dance and drink and enjoy the night out with your peers who are going off the rails. They encourage you to mingle with the eligible men but you know better. Thankfully your father’s wealth has purchased your freedom. There’s no need to pretend to be interested in them or the woman ‘worth’ settling for, to gain the opportunity for a more ‘financially free’ life.

It’s after two in the morning when you’re finally headed home. You tip your cabby and head in the lobby. It's been three weeks since you’ve been taken care of properly and you feel it every time you have to sit in the house alone. You make a mental note to buy a vibrator to take the edge off until you can find Rio’s replacement. The ding of the elevator gets your attention and you head to your apartment unlocking the door. The cold floor feels perfect against your sore feet. You let out a sigh of relief picking up your heels as you lock up behind you. You’re nearly down the hall to your bedroom when you freeze in place. Rio’s seated dressed in all black on your sofa. He stands furious and you take a step back so startled your heart is racing. Maybe it’s the liquor. You squeeze your eyes shut but when you open them he’s more clear.

“How was the party?” He asks.

“What are you doing here?” You ask. 

“My girl has been sick for three weeks dodging me, you’ve been moody and shit so I’m wondering if you're down bad. I come here to be supportive and you don’t answer the door. I worry and get the spare key from management. I come in and you’re nowhere to be found. Now I just know you’ll be back soon but then I’m sitting here waiting and what do I see?” Rio asks before pulling up your social media, all the reposted stories from the girls night are there. You feel caught. His energy is menacing.

“And you didn’t leave and think maybe I don’t want to see you anymore?” You snap and Rio moves quickly grabbing a handful of your hair at the back of your head to pull you in. Your heart races and you feel your body begin to betray your brain, relishing the contact.

“You’re still lying to me?” He challenges. You look up at him in defiance and he smiles loosening his grip on your hair. “I should really leave you high and dry,” he threatens.

“Then let go of me” you respond, challenging him and his grip on your hair releases but he doesn’t step back. You can feel his breath on your face as you look up at him. You stare back at his angry eyes. He’s the only man who’s never cowered at your defiance.

“You think you can quit me just like that?” He asks settling into his usual disposition. Calm, challenging, maddening.

“It'll be pretty easy actually, no pictures, no mutuals, Rio who?” You taunt raising a brow before fearlessly turning your back to him. It strikes a nerve. Sighing to maintain his cool he wonders why he likes strong willed women while admiring  your frame in your selected outfit for the occasion. If it were anyone else he’d be out the door, he wouldn’t put up with it but you have him by the balls and have no idea. He hears the shower running and makes himself comfortable in your bedroom.

“You’re still here?” You respond sarkily fresh out of the shower and better equipped to handle the uninvited guest currently occupying the lounge in your bedroom. Rio’s eyes make note of your tone and that you have nothing under your robe, using it as a more secure towel.

“Mama, I know you’ve got liquor in you but tread lightly. Ya hear?” He warns still in his seat. All you want to do is be his baby. To take care of him, for him to take care of you. To have multiple orgasms to  pass out in his arms throughly fucked and a little sore. To be his road dog on his runs listening to music and eating snacks. To surprise him with blowjobs when he’s stressed from his work and watch as he loses control.

“I’m not drunk” you respond with folded arms.

“C’mere” Rio sighs, relaxing in the lounge chair. Usually it would work but he’s too comfortable. Instead you ignore his request heading into the bathroom to finish up your nighttime routine. You’re looking in the mirror and finishing up your skincare routine with hand lotion when he appears behind you. His expression is serious and you hear metal clanking. Looking down you see he’s unfastened his belt. Your eyes hold his and you watch as his hands slide up your thighs lifting your robe. His lips don’t offer praise or affection; a rarity. Anticipation builds as his hold tightens around your hips. Bringing them back against his growing manhood. He doesn’t need to promise a lesson. His eyes tell you it’s going to be sweet punishment. His hand swipes against your folds to find you’re already ready. He applies pressure before sliding a finger into you. Watching your expression change in the mirror.

“You’re lucky no one else has been in what’s mine” he comments possessively.

“You’re lucky” you contest moaning as he finds his rhythm with his fingers.

“Keep talking shit” he warns but it feels too good to talk back. “What’s that?” He asks finding your spot. Edging you closer and closer to your release.

“Mmmmm” you moan as he changes pace.

“That’s what I thought” he says onto your ear before giving your neck a kiss. You can feel him fully hard pressing into you from behind as he makes you come with his hand. You’re throbbing for more as you pant trying to recover. You want to kiss him but his eyes tell you all is not forgiven yet. He leaves a stinging slap on your ass. Punishment. Your brain chemistry alters making you wetter. It’s sick and twisted what Rio’s capable of bringing out of you. The quickness of the orgasm affirms you haven't stepped out on him, it pisses him off that you've been deliberately depriving him of sex. “When I call, answer the phone, don't send me any more automatic texts, or stupid distant responses.” He says laying down the law. “Dont ignore me” he adds.

“If you want me to behave differently treat me better” you manage standing upright and looking at him in the mirror again. He should walk out now. He should be done with you but he isn’t. You watch his jaw clench. He sees what needs to be done in spite of it being early morning, your defiance energises him. When he smiles your heart catches and it’s the moment he slides in full hilt. Gasping, your eyes close as he fills you completely, fitting snug. The feel of your walls around him nearly makes him lose control but he has a point to prove. When you wake up he wants you to see and feel him all over you. Pulling back before going back in repeatedly you feel your breaths grow shallow. The feeling is second to none.  It’s why Rio’s so different. Your chemistry is always enough foreplay. He leaves you satiated every time. He’s no slouch and your moans affirm the truth. Instead of putting on a show most of the time you’re fighting to hold them back. But Rio knows how much you enjoy when he’s inside you. The slickness of your walls, the responsiveness of your body, how soft and malleable you become. Gripping the counter you brace for his impact as he fucks you into it. His hand protectively palms your stomach to keep you from falling forward into the faucet. His pace and strength is punishing in the best way possible. You come hard again.You want a break but when he pulls out he lowers. Gripping your thighs bringing you closer to claim you with his mouth. He hoists you onto the counter to better his leverage before sucking and driving you crazy.

“Leave me for who” he asks, somehow still dominating you while in a submissive position. He continues like his appetite for you is insatiable and it must be because in  moments you find yourself beyond the point of comprehension. You moan yeses and other sounds of praise. He’s so good you can barely enjoy the sight of him pleasing you. Your head is back for most of it. You come even harder the third time absolutely spent. Rio gets up slower this time he knows you’re worn thin. He knows he has you in the palm of his hands. You look at his manhood standing at attention. His pants aren’t fully off, neither are his boxers. That’s how much he needed you. Your robe is still on too, you albeit not properly. There wasn’t even time to undress. Looking at him you go to return the favour but Rio stops you.

“No, I want to be in my pussy” he tells you, turning you around again.

“Let’s go to bed” you offer.

“Shut up be a boss and take it standing up” he continues goading you. Your legs are tired from standing all night and worn in from your orgasms.

“Rio please?” You whine and he chuckles.

“Now you want to be nice?” he asks.

“Baby please” you add.

“Now I’m baby?” he smiles pecking your cheek, having omitted his usual intimacy.

“Mhm” you nod.

“Words” he challenges.

“Rio!” You snap and he silences you again with re-entry. His hand over your mouth stifles a curse before he lets you taste your arousal on his fingers. His strokes are lighter than before and his rhythm is lethal. He’s a man that listens, he hits just where you need, and you feel the last bit of resistance and tension leave your body like a spool of thread being spun out. Your body is pliable and responsive. You lose your restraint, your moans affirming his talent and everything you feel. Rio’s moans follow, so do curses. Your body buzzes with satisfaction as you feel his pace hitch and the tension of a coming release. You prepare for the loss of contact but it doesn’t come. He thrusts deeper coming inside of you. You’re surprised for a millisecond before the feeling makes you relax. Your body settles completely. You feel goosebumps pepper your flesh as he hums emptying all of his pent up lust into you. You dare to look up into the mirror. His eyes are watching you. The anger is out of his face, his expression is blank and distant. You don’t recognize it as you feel his arousal dripping down your leg. His palm is against your stomach again. You hold it tighter and he comes to. You realise he’s sated and the unfamiliar look is a mix of exhaustion and euphoria. You want to kiss him so bad, he steps back pulling out and robbing you of the contact. His manhood bounces as it falls. You feel sore instantly. It takes him some time to catch his breath. Catching yours, you don’t know how to feel. If he’s still upset or if you’re back on solid ground. Rio answers the question when he turns on the water in your shower and holds out a hand inviting you in. You both get naked and he kisses you hard under the water before washing you up with care. He’s unpredictable and you are relieved he hasn't walked out to make you eat your words. After washing you up he gets dressed, choosing from the clothes he’s left for times like these, and to mark his territory.

“It’s quiet” he comments as you get into your night dress. A smirk plays on his lips. You roll your eyes climbing into the bed incapable of further defiance and too exhausted for a witty retort. Rio follows suit, pulling you in and spooning you. You know sleep won’t be far.

“Nite” he whispers.

“Nite” you respond.

When you awake you’re happy until you see Rio getting dressed. Rolling over you check the time to see it's 8am. Not enough time has passed for a full rest. You don’t have the energy to argue with him. Putting on a T-shirt Rio snickers pleased with the fruit of his labour. Now dressed in a sweatsuit he walks over to your side of the bed leaning in for a kiss. You oblige and he steals a few extra pecks before standing to look at you.

“Get some rest, I have a meeting. I’ll be back with some breakfast around 11:30, then I want you on the road with me” Rio says casually.

“Rio-“ you start, he knows you’re about to protest by your tone.

“I don’t want to hear about that shit anymore. You want to be public, now everyone will know I’m fucking you when you start to show in a few months. You won’t be able to get rid of me for years.” He says shocking you. You sit up scared straight and he smiles.

“Later … mama” he says walking out with a wink.

———-

Authors Note: Rio’s hell right? But we love our bad boy 😉 This one’s for the anons who wanted it nasty. I did my best to keep it Rio. Let me know if I got the vibe you were looking for. Like, comment, reblog.

[wileys-russo]

katie mccabe, “are you blushing?”, any place 🫶🏻

hot in here II k.mccabe

"oh gosh its a bit much isn't it?" your mum spoke with wide eyes and a wince as your girlfriend went tumbling to the ground, up on her feet within seconds and shoving at the chest of the player who'd taken her down.

"thats it katie! get into her girl!" your dad cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted supportively as you smacked him on the shoulder. "dad! don't encourage her." you groaned, pulling him to sit back down as both katie and the other player were awarded yellows.

"mccard strikes again." you heard someone chuckle behind you, shaking your head as your dad turned around to speak with them. "she gets a lot of those is all." you explained to your mum who seemed hopelessly confused.

"wait why is there more time?" your mum frowned as they announced there would be three added minutes of injury time. "its extra time to make up for the time where the game isn't played. like if a player falls down and needs medical attention the game is paused, so this is the time added for that interruption." you explained as she exhaled in understanding.

"go on katie! rip in!" your dad shouted as your girlfriend readied herself for a throw in, catching your eye with a wink and a grin before turning and lobbing the ball towards steph. "i hope you know the more you fluff her ego the more insufferable she gets." you sighed as time ticked down.

"ah she's confident! you need confidence to be successful. she's good at what she does and she knows it, that should be encouraged!" your dad patted your knee as you only hummed. "you should try living with her then." you chuckled with a shake of your head.

"oh! theres that lovely song again." your mum beamed as katies chant started up, your dad yelling along as katie took off down the right hand side. "go on katie! go girl!" your dad boomed as suddenly she side stepped the last player in her way and hit the ball with aloud thud, sending it hurtling forward toward alessia who tapped it in widening arsenals 3-0 lead.

you grinned as your girlfriend raced past you and your parents blowing you a kiss and giving them a wave as there was barely time for villa to kick off before the final whistle blew.

"oh that was exciting. i still don't understand much but i see why you like it!" your mum pulled you into a hug making you laugh. "she appreciates you made the effort to come, but she was nervous this morning." you revealed, watching as katie did her laps thanking fans, stopping every now and then to sign something.

"katie? nervous? thats something you need to see to believe!" your dad laughed patting you on the back as you chatted away with them, introducing them to leahs mum who made her way over to say hello, all four of you speaking until you heard a familiar whistle.

"we'll be down in two seconds darling." your mum nodded for you to go as you left them with amanda and made your way down to your girlfriend.

"well aren't you a sight for sore eyes stranger." the irishwoman teased, having been away the last week visiting your parents before they returned back with you to spend the next few days in london.

"wow its been so long when was the last time i saw you? oh was it maybe...this morning in bed?" you teased, having returned last night. "i'd almost forgotten what your face looked like." you winked, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

whatever smooth one line she intended to quip back with was interrupted at the arrival of your parents, katie hopping over the barrier to greet them properly as your dad launched into a very animated recap of how well she played.

"oh and that yellow? load of horse shit you were only defending yourself!" your dad bellowed as you winced, his voice carrying far beyond your small huddle. "dad!" you hissed, katies arm wrapping around your waist as her hand grazed the small of your back in a wordless comfort.

~

"i warned you they wouldn't let you pay baby." you laughed as you and katie stepped inside your shared home, unwrapping the multitude of layers which had been keeping you protected from the bitter chill of a winter evening in london.

"i'm callin ahead next time and settin up a tab!" your girlfriend scowled, having been easily shut down by your dad who'd paid for everyone's dinner despite both you and katie trying to protest it.

"watch it mccabe, at your age you'll get frown lines and crows feet." you teased, reaching up to smooth the wrinkles from her furrowed forehead. "oi! watch it cheeky i'm only a year older than ya." the defender warned as you sent her a wink and made your way to the living room.

"my parents really enjoyed the game baby, and you certainly gave them a show to watch." you grinned, pulled into your girlfriends lap as she sank into the lounge beside you. "i'm glad they finally got to see one, we'll get em to a national game next and then they'll really see a show!" the brunette smiled wolfishly as you laughed and pressed a tender kiss to her lips.

"i think my dad might actually contend me for your biggest fan, he was going on and on and on about you long before kick off. mum said he stayed up watching a bunch of your highlights in the hotel, she had to take his phone to force him to sleep!" you laughed, a slight pink flush coating your girlfriends cheeks at your words.

"are you blushing?" you gasped, grabbing her face as she frowned and shook her head. "no! its just...warm in here. me cheeks are red from it being so cold outside!" katie dismissed with a wave as you smirked.

"you're blushingg, you're so cute baby." you cooed, pinching her cheeks mockingly and shaking her face side to side teasingly. "aih lay off! i am not and i don't blush." katie scoffed with a roll of her eyes, shoving you off of her causing you to yelp.

"we've got mccabe! who? katie mccabe! who? i just don't think you understand!" you started to cry out, standing to your feet as the footballer stared up at you unamused. "she plays out on the wing, she blushes at every little thing, we've got katie mccabe!" you sang out, squealing as she grabbed at you and pulled you down back to lay across her lap.

"did you not like the remix babe? i think it'll go down a treat at the emirates." you smirked, your girlfriend glaring down at you though you saw the usual sparks of amusement and mischief present in her eyes.

"you're bloody lucky you're so cute darlin or i'd have dropped you a long time ago." "oh god and she's a charmer too? the full package you are love, i'll try to work that into the next verse."

[sprite-writes-fanfic]

How would the Tmnt bros (2003) react to a best friend who has a crush on them and at first they don't feel the same way, But way later on they develop feelings for their friend but theres that bit of awkwardness in that they already rejected said Friend's prior confession.

And like the friend took the rejection well and is trying to move on, though theres a bit of tension as the friend is subtly trying to avoid like being alone or like to close physically with their turtle crush so as to not make them uncomfortable and even gets on a dating app (with 0% success there lol) They atleast hide their still very much there feelings and are good at not being obvious they are still down bad for the turtle.

Also I cant get enough of your writing! I love it so much Always looking forward to the next post, Hope your having a wonderful week!

Hey anon! Sorry for the long wait! Thank you so much for your kind words <3 I really hope you enjoy this one!

Awkward…

🐢💙❤️TMNT ‘03 x Reader💜🧡🐢

Word Count: 642

CW: Gender-neutral reader, referred to as ‘you’, a bit more on the angsty side for some, for others they get a bit of fluff. The boys and Mikey don’t know how to healthy deal with their emotions. Without further ado, I hope you enjoy!

🐢💙Leonardo💙🐢

💙 Leo feels like a huge dick. Like, seriously. He felt really bad having to reject you, now he feels really bad that suddenly he feels those same feelings. Like, man. This is NOT what he wanted.

💙 Will actually avoid you at all costs because he feels so bad, he’s trying to focus on other things. He luckily feels better in a group setting so it’s just not you and him.

💙 He misses old times quite a bit, and when he sees the obvious signs that you’re still into him, he’s a mess. Man is just a goddamn mess. Like what’s he supposed to do in this situation? He’s heavily considering talking to you about this but he’s also very scared too.

🐢❤️Raphael❤️🐢

❤️ Despite your confession, you and Raph remained rather close, I mean he wouldn’t ever let little feelings like that ruin— And he’s caught feelings too. Right after he’s rejected you. Oh he feels awful.

❤️ Taking his frustrations out on the punching bag and sparring lately, RIP Mikey. He’s just really upset, because not only did he reject you, but he’s seen those dating apps on your phone too. He wants to sincerely make it up to you.

❤️ Isn’t sure if he should shoot his shot or just let it be and wait and see if these feelings go away or get stronger… He chooses to wait. He chooses to see if these feelings just happened because of the confession and they’re a short time thing. Will shoot his shot a year or two later if you’re both still feeling the same and you’re still single.

🐢💜Donatello💜🐢

💜 Poor Donnie’s brain is going haywire. It was about three months later that he rejected you that he suddenly caught feelings, and it suddenly occurred to him while he was working on his latest invention. And he could not stop thinking about it either.

💜 Dude was panicking a lot when he first realized, and honestly felt himself wanting to cry. He was overwhelming himself at the moment and ended up going to Master Splinter for comfort. After that fiasco, he’s very distant. Like, he’s worse than Leo, kind of distant. He’s just drowning himself in his work and it takes a toll on him mentally.

💜 You end up catching him one day and forcing him to talk, and he finally kinda admits that he’s been feeling like shit because he’s rejected you, and that he randomly caught feelings as well. You two certainly talked for hours, trying to get it sorted out. And if either goes: You two remain friends and try to move past this. Or, you both give a possible relationship a chance after spending more time together.

🐢🧡Michelangelo🧡🐢

🧡 To say he didn’t expect this was an understatement, the feelings just kinda hit him out of nowhere. When you helped him patch up after a skateboard trick gone-wrong, it hit him. Mikey liked you, but he already rejected your confession. Uh oh.

🧡 He definitely thinks on it, for once, instead of going in and flirting with you. For once he was thinking about this, as he felt guilty about it. When he’s thought about it, he’s probably gonna be the only one who’s open about it unlike the rest of his brothers, only one that has really healthy communication.

🧡 When he’s open and honest, he’s extremely nervous, I mean, who wouldn’t be? Rejecting you then telling you how he feels about you is pretty messed up. Luckily, the two of you talk it out and try to reconcile and work it out. Luckily, your feelings were still there and blazing, and it’d take a bit before you could completely forgive him, but you both worked it out. You’re giddy to say you have a date on Friday and you’ve deleted all the dating apps off your phone within minutes after you and Mikey’s big talk.

[cranberryjuice-posts]

Okay so like hear me out.

Reader went on a quest years ago when her and Clarisse were still young and they went missing/were pronounced dead. But in reality they got stuck in the Lotus Casino so when Chiron sent some campers to retrieve campers that he already knew were stuck there they found the supposedly “dead” reader playing in the arcade.

Reader goes back to camp and finds Clarisse after all these years and returns like some weapon or smth that Clarisse gave them so they could defend themselves. (Reader obviously aged somehow so theres no weird age gap or smth)

- harness your hopes -

Pairings - Clarisse La Rue x Fem! Reader

An - i tried to find a way to write this without a plot hole since in the lotus hotel you don’t age key example nico di-Angelo so I hope this helps some 😭😭

“It’s Vegas”

“No it’s the best place in America. AND! And they have legal gambling” you laughed walking along side clarisse down the streets of Las Vegas.

Being placed on a mission together you both had an older saytr leading. Your main assignment was to locate a demigod that was near by and to help return them to camp safely.

Brushing your hands against clarisses you blushed some, it was just a dumb crush. You were 13 and so was she anything that could between you both was just pointless. Contrasting your thoughts however clarisse slowly reached over taking your hand.

The saytr guide gave you both a teasing face causing clarisse to pull her hand away embarrassed. As the guide chuckled turning back to lead the way you patted your cheeks trying to make the burning feeling go away.

After about an hour you all decided on getting lunch. While just waiting outside with clarisse she tapped your shoulder making you look at her.

“Here.. I saw your dagger got broken in our last fight so have mine” she tried hard to play it off but you could tell she was really just trying to show a form of love.

“Thanks” you happily smiled taking the blade back. Looking down at the blade you could see in the reflection clarisse looking Away embarrassed. Cute

It was weird.

One minute you were running away from a hippalectryon, next you were laying on the ground with a glowing wolf over you? Then you woke up in a casino like hotel.

The following week felt unreal, gambling every once in a while. Finding other demigods and running around with them, meeting some kids who said the Roman gods were real? Weird. Even becoming friends with this small kid named nico who un-ironically liked mythomagic just as much as you.

Being so caught up in the moment you hadn’t realized your body and mind growing. On Monday you were happy to eat a tub of ice cream all day while most people treated you like a kid, on Tuesday you were schooling some little kid on why he shouldn’t cheat in games and the older demigods you had seen before suddenly invited you to hangout with them.

Sitting in the lounging area you saw a familiar set of bright orange shirts paired with some of your friends you had just met. Quickly getting up you jogged over. “Hey! Wait up!” Finally standing before them your happy face turned to confusion. “Chris..?”

The Chris you suddenly Remembered had been 14 and recently shaved his head as he lost a bet now.. he looked older, way more muscular than before and for some reason he seemed more mature.

“Holy shit” he spoke shocked. Almost scared he reached out grabbing your shoulders. “What’s your name” he cautiously spoke.

“Yn Chris when did you get so old” you shoved his hands off of you. You had been gone a week not a lifetime.

“Are You dead?” He asked earning him an unamused look from you. Placing your hands on your hips you gave a heavy sigh. “No I’m not dead why are you asking”

“Because you’ve been dead for three years”

…

..

What..

—

The ride back to camp was weird. While Travis and Connor drove the truck back to camp you talked with Chris as he updated you and all the campers with you that in-fact everyone was trapped with the lotus eaters.

Though what confused him and everyone else was how you were able to age and mature like a normal person.

Pulling your dagger out from your side you studied it ashamed. So much time passed without you.. your siblings grew up, the camp evolved, it was like you didn’t even belong in this timeline. Shining the celestial bronze blade a sudden memory came back to you.

A girl named clarisse came back to you. A girl named clarisse who you loved, came back to you. With that all the flustered emotions of a young teenager followed suit as well.

Stepping inside to camp a familiar sense of comfort washed over you. Three years later and the damn place still hadn’t changed.

Though the walk though camp was awkward to say the least. All your friends were 16/17 now and there was so many new kids and dead ones that it was honestly a lot.

Eventually you found yourself sitting in the Aphrodite cabin with silena, leaning on her bed laughing like it was old times.

“You know what!” The daughter Aphrodite smiled leaning over the side. “There’s a certain lesbian here who misses you”

“Who” You chuckled slowly remembering everything. Silena looked at you with a knowing look. “Wait clarisse?! No no she doesn’t— we never liked each other like that” you laughed trying to play it off.

“Then I guess it won’t be weird for you to go meet up with her right now”

After a silent back and forth you caved in standing up. “Fine! I’ll go see her but we’re just friends” You warned leaving the cabin.

Jogging into the arena you had to take a moment to appreciate what you saw in-front of you. 5’10 and lean just swinging her spear around with a concentrated look plastered on her face. Even even she was taking her anger out clarisse was still beautiful.

She stuck her spear into the sand and started tying her curly hair back. Placing her hands on her hips she let out a heavy sigh just letting the energy fall away from her body.

Slowly walking towards her you cleared your throat nervous… justtt friends that’s what you were. “Hey..” you managed.

Instantly she looked over stunner and a little embarrassed. Clarisse didn’t move, didnt even speak. She opened her mouth for only a second before just closing it again not sure what to say.

Deciding to take the first step you gently patted your sides. Pulling the dagger from your side you held it out. “I figured I don’t need it anymore so I should return it-“

“Keep it” she quickly spoke. “Sorry.. I’m just, it’s been a long time” a tired breath left her lips causing you to blush slightly.

“Right..“ placing the blade away you looked back up deciding that maybe just standing in silence was the best think to do.

What felt like an eternity soon came to an end when clarisse decided to finally speak up. “Can we.. can we hangout tommorow” she slowly asked.

Nodding your head adamantly you smiled. “Yeah, I’d like that a lot.”

———

“Shut up it did not feel like a week” clarisse laughed walking around the forest with you. For majority if the day you both had just spent time together, almost like a date.

Now with the moon rising you both decided to finish the hangout off with a walk in the woods. “It did” you giggled. “I swear to the gods I was only there for a week”

She just rolled her eyes. “Must of been nice” she mumbled shaking her head. Confused you chuckled back. “What do you mean?”

“Well you didn’t have to spend three years thinking the first girl you ever actually fell in love with was dead and having to find some way to continue yourself that leaving her to bleed out after she protected you from dying wasn’t yourself and was the right thing to do”

You stopped walking and just looked up at clarisse. “You love me”

She looked back at you and just shrugged her shoulders. She was completely different from the dumb childhood crush you had. Slowly you grabbed clarisses arm and took her hand into yours. Looking down you smiled as she was wearing one of your favorite rings.

“I don’t remember a lot. I don’t know how I ended up in the hotel.. but what I do remember is that throughout my long week stay I always remembered a girl who could effortlessly make me laugh and always made my stomach do flips” a small laugh left your mouth. “Out of everything and everyone I always remembered being in love with you clarisse”

Shyly with her free hand she cupped the side of your face. Brining you close to her she muttered. “Can I Kiss you..”

Laughing some you nodded. “Yeah you can kiss me”

Placing her lips onto yours you couldn’t help b it smile happily. It made you feel warm how some way some how clarisse waited for you. Guess it was a good think to since you had no choice but to wait for her too.

Clarisse - FUCK ALL YOU MOTHER FUCKERS I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND SUCK IT

YN - babe 😭

—

[canaidliafail]

roommates

Abby x f!reader x ellie 🌿 2.1k words

listen idk what demon possessed me but I had to write about a threeway relationship with ellabs in a college AU. Its just random scenes of what it would be like and theres filth so MDI

CW: voyerism I think, jealousy and abby and ellie being unhinged over reader [ like srsl ] , established relationship, mentions of alcohol & dealer ellie. not proof read, will never be. Say a prayer and go ahead and read idk

“In a moment you're getting the shivers

'Cause I know the way you feel

My body gives you chills”

•••

In college, rumors went around fast. Everyone knew that Cindy from chem had relapsed for the third time that year, that Alexander had hooked up with every exchange student, that Abby was probably that richest kid in the entire campus and that Ellie was the hottest lesbian dealer that lived in dormitory B5.

That along with the fact that Abby, Ellie and you were roommates. Manny and Dina had, on different occasions tried to get a hold of you and fill you in on how hot the gossip on the three of you were but it just failed to entertain you enough to listen.

You didn’t give a fuck actually. You were so blissfully content with your reality that you weren’t interested in knowing what everyone else's half assed version sounded like. Your girlfriends though were different. Abby and Ellie had the inseparable dynamic of oil and water. They just did not get along but they did find common sense when it came to you and they had to know what was going on. Blind and deep in love they forgot how they themselves were a prize and considered most people who approached you a threat.

Abby vaguely remembered a rumor when you three first started going out after Jesse's birthday. Ellie was the supplier that night and the girl that came by your dorm to pick up the stuff caught you two making out in the hallway. Ellie was a bit more flustered to be caught like that while you just rolled your eyes as if she was the problem invading your public space and walked inside your room, though back then, the girl assumed you were staying over at Ellie’s place. In the span of a week,the whole art department knew that Ellie allegedly had a girlfriend. That was until someone interrupted the conversation

“Wait, is Ellie's girl the one in sculpture ?You know she has a lot of tattoos and talks with Nora a lot?”

“Yeah her!”

“Well than she has to be cheating on her cause I saw her In Anderson's car the other night and they were like,going at it”

So other than “that girl with tattoos in sculpture major” you were also “The one two timing Ellie and Abby”

Abby didn’t know how much of a hot topic she was. She knew people talked but not about her. She was cooking and ellie was smoking weed on the kitchen counter keeping her company when you barged in your dorm room.

“You have to hear this” You said excitedly and tossed your bag on the couch and your shoes all over the hallway which Abby being a clean freak knew would have to organize by herself later that evening. You run up to them in the kitchen and Ellie out of habit spread her legs to let you in her space for a kiss. Which you didn’t really give but instead you took her blunt and took one long good puff.

“So I was talking with my friends and apparently there’s this rumor going around that I am cheating on Ellie williams with Abby anderson”

Abby stilled her hand while working with the pan and the stir fry food and she turned to look at Ellie the same moment that she did. They came to a silent agreement to solve this issue which you found quite embarrassing to think over in the first place. You couldn’t take problems like these seriously and hell, who doesn’t have people talking shit behind their back ?

“Oh c'mon don’t tell me you are mad” You whined and abby turned around to cup your cheek,gently caressing you

“Doesn’t it bother you? That they are doing this?”

“It would but thats so much effort and like…oh my fucking god who caresssss” You drew out and left to go rest on the couch.

“Can’t you two just… make out the next time you are on campus or something ? That will solve things or whatever”

And they did. Not because you told them to, but at some point abby had to help Ellie’s scrawny ass carry some fresh wood planks to her working space in class to build a new canvas and before they parted ways she did kiss her on the lips, hard and long and then she left to attend her own lectures. The rumors didn’t die but people had a rough idea of what was going on now.

________

Abby loved eating you out continuously and tirelessly. She would come to a pussydrunk state where she would lazily lap up at your pussy like she was starving and despite wanting to take the reins and be more commanding,her skill rendered you weak and helpless and a moaning mess, and when you were voiceless from the pleasure your soft sighs did the job for her. And that's when usually Ellie would come strapped up and take you right after Abby was finished devouring your puffy cunt.

Abby unbuckled her belt with a heavy clank once the metal clasp snapped open that signified it was your turn to please which had you licking your lips eager to taste her. Ellie pushed you on all fours and slapped your thighs as indication to spread them apart and got into position behind you admiring your ass for a good few seconds while Abby sat in front of you, legs spread and a cigarette in hand taunting you to go ahead.

You usually took your time,biting her freckled thighs and leaving a path of bruising bitemarks which had her groan in fake protest most of the time. You pressed your palms flat against her legs and moved your head closer to her cunt,your nose buried in the trimmed blonde hair as you licked a flat thick stripe that had Abby flinch in pleasure. Ellie took her moment to slowly slide in her new thick strap toy in you

“Abby prepared you so well for my cock, fuck look at it just sliding in”

Abby was loud, Ellie was vocal, and you loved the combination of the two in bed.

Abby would hold your hair up,a string of praises falling from her lips and ellie would lean in leaving kisses on your back as she thrusted her hips in a pace that fastened every minute enjoying how well you took her every time.

__________

You rarely left the apartment alone since your schedules matched with one of your girlfriends. However on the sparse occasion that you did, you always found yourself in trouble.

You stepped out of the room and were busy locking the door when you heard a girl behind you scoff. You turned to look at the unpleasant figure who hoarded the space and you smirked

“Can I help you?”

“Yeah how about you keep it down at night?”

She snapped, aiming to shame you. She wasn’t wrong. Last night was something else. When you and Abby dominated Ellie at the same time it usually ended up in the rest of the dormitory having a poor night. It was a bit homophobic in your opinion to only target you when there was Manny, one floor above you being just as rowdy with his girlfriend.

You smiled and leaned against the wall effectively walking into her personal space. She froze on the spot and looked up at you. You weren’t tall but you were tall enough to use it to your advantage at times like these

“Aren’t you the girl who tried to get into Ellies pants on Jesse's birthday?”

She frowned and quirked her mouth in disgust

“You are so delusional”

You looked into her eyes,down to her lips and then slowly fixed a crooked fold on her shoulder pads from her shirt

“Am I though? You pathetic cunt, if you came for a fight at least follow through” She tensed,lost and unsure on how to handle this situation when Abby walked out of the door and yanked you away from the girl like a wet cat, holding your arm in a way that it made it look like she only tried to get a hold of your backpack to slide it on her own shoulders. To you, it was a warning, to the stranger it seemed like a gesture of affection.

“Wait for me in my car. I'll drive you” she said and passed you her keys. You left, unbothered and entertained enough for the rest of the day. Abby however glared at the girl and stalked over, towering over her like a hawk in a much more aggressive manner than you did and she seemed to shrink in on herself

“If you talk to her again I'll make sure you end up on the streets. If you insult her, you might even have to retake the exams for a different college” she barked and left.

You were in Abby’s car and had turned the heater on and were already looking at what song to put on from the speakers. She sat on the driver's seat and grabbed your phone

“Hey!”

“What the fuck was that” she growled and you rolled your eyes and leaned your head against the window

“I don’t get why you take everything so personally” You whispered and she carefully put a hand on your shoulder to get your attention. You turned your head and she pulled you in for a kiss, her hand on the nape of your neck. She lingered there to keep you close and rubbed her thumb in a straight line against your spine,the soft gesture contradicting her stern tone

“You need to learn to apologize. That attitude was completely unprovoked”

“Didn’t you hear what she said?”

“I did and I expected you to handle it better than that”

You looked at each other and eventually you agreed and let out a small and curt sorry to show remorse which she half accepted as a first step to changing your actions. Abby, no matter how in the wrong you were, would always have your back in public and would only scold you when she knew you had privacy and were alone and that was something you loved about her.

You smiled and wrapped your arms around her neck and went to kiss her before moving down to her neck to leave new bitemarks near Ellie’s

“You are insatiable”

“You are hot when you are mad at me babygirl '' You teased and watched as Abby's cheeks took a new shade of pink.

__________

Abby and Ellie weren’t exactly opposite forces but they did not blend either, So when you had walked in on them making out on the couch with Abby on top of Ellie you had to take a photo silently stalking in from the corridor. You loved watching them please each other. There weren’t many times that you caught them in the midst of it but when you did you did everything within your power to stay silent and just enjoy the view. That was until your phone betrayed you with the shallow “click” that hinted at a photo being taken.

Abby pulled away first,lips a new hue of red trying to steady herself on the armrest while ellie took a moment to fix her tousled short hair.She looked at you and you never thought doe eyes could look so menacing and mischievous .

“Enjoying the show?”

You walked in and stood in front of the couch, arms crossed as you leaned against the wall

“Absolutely. Go on”

Ellie pulled abby back in for another kiss clearly to horny to entertain this conversation and sucked on her lower lip in need. She followed Ellie’s lead and pushed her lower on the cushions of the sofa moaning into the kiss. Ellie was a good kisser and she knew it, and just imagining how good abby felt had you sitting on the sofa across the couch and spreading your legs to make yourself comfortable knowing you would soon have to slide your hand in your pants to release the building tension in your stomach.

___________

Ellie and Abby got along as roommates but not as people. Ellie kept to herself and in their shared space which was the living room she only had a tray with her smoking gear and a bag of weed but otherwise she didn’t cram the space with any other items. Abby liked plants and Ellie found them to be a decent choice for decor and that was that. Dormitory B5 was known for having nicer and more spacious rooms. Abby was rich and Ellie’s side hustle made her comfortable enough. In the first two years of them living together they talked occasionally and they knew each other's friend group. They did bond once over their shitty ex’s and Abby appreciated Ellie’s seriousness when she came out to her confused and convinced that she was perhaps a lesbian. That was it though. In the second semester of their second year however you moved in. Abby told Ellie that if they didn’t like their new roommate she could easily pull a few strings to have you out but that was thrown out of the window once they saw you.

You took up all of their space, You had pottery items in Abby’s room when you wanted to show her something and eventually forget them there, and you had left your makeup on Ellies desk because you often sat there since, in your words “The sun coming from your window is so much better than mine”

The living room now was full of posters and you insisted on having to spend time together at least on Saturdays. You were comfortable and your comfort made them relax as well. Ellie of course knew what it was. She wanted you and she was head over heels for you and all of that was sealed when she came to your apartment after a shitty 3 hour art history lecture to find you making dinner for everyone. You also had a gift for her

“Remember how you told me about that comic ? So funny story, my friend actually was getting rid of his collection since he is moving out and I asked him to give them to me so here you go”

Ellie actually cried that night, moved by your gesture and when she saw you now all she heard in her mind was “wife wife wife”

But Ellie wasn’t the only one. Abby had magically shifted her entire schedule in a way that whenever you had a free day she had one as well and she would be in the apartment with you.

Abby had never felt lust like this before. If she couldn’t own the wind she wanted to at least tame it and dance with it for a while.

The two of them talked and somehow came to a mutual understanding that if you were to choose either of them they would be peaceful about it. Another silent agreement that they took however was to make sure you would end up with either of them and not someone else.

The first time it happened, all three of you were drunk out of your minds blasting music from the speakers and played a raunchy card game that Abby didn’t even remember if it existed in the first place. One thing led to another and suddenly you found yourself in your underwear only, fondling Ellies chest while nibbling on her neck and Abby pressed against your back, her hand under your panties fingering you while whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

Just like you moving in and settling into their lives, a relationship between the three of you occurred just as naturally since you felt like the missing link that they needed to connect.

————-

Ellie was unhinged and she was aware of it and it was one of the things that she didn’t care to fix. not when Abby was a jock who flaunted her wealth and threatened with it and certainly not when she saw how aroused you were every time she brought her butterfly knife in the bedroom.

However she also knew that sometimes she took it too far.

She once overheard a guy in your major fawn over you in the most grotesque way, salivating over the fact that you wore a dress that accentuated your ass in all the right ways, and the low v front cut of the top showed your sternum tattoos in a “provocative way”

Ellie was no better than a man because she had noticed all those things herself which was why she ate you out in the elevator that morning and caused the entire building to believe that it was out of service for 36 minutes. However when Ellie thought of that it was different. So she leaned against the door and played with her knife, carrying them around campus under the excuse that she needed them to sharpen her coals for her artworks, even though she carried them for very different situations that she wasn’t shamed to admit that she made use of. She didn’t say anything but when they noticed her staring they did turn around to face her the same time that you were ready to leave. You walked up to her oblivious to the tension around her and went in for a small greeting peck that she turned into a french kiss with her hands on your ass pulling you closer. She lifted one hand to cradle your head and looked at the guy across the hall challenging him to continue his fruitless attempts to hit on you to which he just frowned and looked away confused and in disgust.

That night, when you were blissfully asleep on Abby’s chest she mentioned what happened to her in a tone that indicated that she planned on handling it herself. Ellie knew though, that if word of a situation like that reached Abby’s ears the guys would probably either end up kicked out of campus at best, hospitalised at worst.

••••

heres my ko-fi tip jar if you enjoy my work 🤍

[jevilowo]

TEAM ASCENDED FORTRESS 2

An AU by me in which the mercs ascend to their ultimate forms

Oh God tumblr wrecked the quality-

More about the AU under the cut!

WOKE SCOUT: she started taking estrogen and instead of fixing her it made her worse. She gets into fights on twitter about neopronouns and has successfully cancelled everyone she doesn't like at least once. However, as cancel culture isn't real, this only lasted about three seconds for each. She managed to pull Ms Pauling also which is pretty cool.

SOLDIERSUNE MIKU: the ghost of Shakespearicles told him to dress as Miku and redo the salem witch trials. Only knowing one witch (Merasmus), he finished this quickly and now roams the country with Zhanna (who is now Zhannagane Miku after Mikus metal counterpart) spreading malice and wonder through the power of AMERICAN SONG COVERS. He uses a wig for the Miku effect, but is working on growing his hair out also.

MITOSIS: Pyro and Engie were shagging one time and they came so hard they did mitosis. Now theres 23 babey Pyros (count em) and Engineer is a single dad. There's a lot of Pyro Mitosis Lore™ in my head, but the basics are that they evolve into either humanoid, beastial, demonic or celestial Pyros eventually.

TAVISH, KING OF THE LOCH NESS: he did it he blew up that bloody sea monster and now he is king of Loch Ness. The self loathing has died down a lot which is great for him but his body is still a scrumpty distillery which is eh. Still, he has funky water powers and his partners Soldiersune and Zhannagane come to visit often.

KEEPER OF TIME AND SPACE GUY: Heavy was mad, he knew he'd been had so he shot at the sun with a gun. Instead of being a show off like that bitch Juno, he had a nice philosophical conversation and chess match with Time and impressed Time so much he was appointed as the guardian of Time and Time's partner, Space. His guns (the six angel thingies pictured) can turn into celestial weapons which helps in the protecting but people don't shoot at the sun so often so its a relaxing enough gig really.

GODDAMMIT ENGIE: after realising how much more efficient Gunslinger was than a lame ass human hand, Engie succumbed to his hubris and eventually replaced all his body parts with robot parts. Including his dick which led to the Mitosis Incident. Anyway. His chest is a dispenser which makes projects pretty convenient and he has a mini-sentry attached to each arm and leg, making him a walking weapon. This did not help with the god complex, but it helps with the single father thing.

THE INFERNAL DOCTOR: Medic kept attaching more souls to his own and selling them to Satan for power. Satan got so sick of this eventually he attempted to beat the shit out of Medic. By now Medic was slightly more powerful than Satan so this ended with Medic absorbing Satan's powers and basically taking his place. Somehow, his relationship with the guy who is now a celestial being was unaffected by this. If they really tried they could probably ascend even further. To godhood, perhaps. In any case, Medic becoming The Devil from The Bible did nothing for the god complex.

???: Sniper just kind of fucked off into the woods one day god knows what happened to him but Scout's convinced she saw him for like three seconds a week ago and "YOU GUYS HE HAD ANTLERS I SWEAR-"

RETIRED AND BECAME A FUNCTIONING MEMBER OF SOCIETY SPY: yeah. He's very happy with Scout's Mother (Maureen), and he's letting his roots grow out (his spy agency made him dye his hair black). He's even making an effort to be a good parent to Scout, bought her the trans flag ipad cover and everything, but she just keeps trying to cancel him. Maureen's sure they'll work it out between themselves eventually, but until then she has to keep finding more secure hiding places for the ipad (the best so far was the time she buried it under a tree a mile away, took Scout at least four hours to find and retrieve it that time)

There's also YURI MS PAULING, in which she pulled a whole polycule of beautiful women, but I'll cover her in another post.

Also TERFS DNI please. Woke Scout is just Scout being Scout (which is to say a bit stupid), and assuming all trans women are like that would be ridiculous. So fuck off.

[plutonianeris]

ᴘɪᴄᴋ ᴀ ᴄᴀʀᴅ: accepting where people see you as the villain ⛓𓌹*♰*𓌺⛓

this is a general reading & for entertainment purposes only, take what resonates and leave what doesn't. scroll through the images & choose based on your inner guidance and gut feeling. 🖤

♱☾pile one☽

sometimes it feels like you can never win because one way or another, theres always someone criticizing you. People are nervous around you and its not necessarily anything you do. I got a lot of scorpio and plutonian energy in my cards/ the oracles. People in your daily life make you seem like the villain because either 1) you don't share too much of you and they are craving for access or 2) you are equally as suspicious of them. Regardless, people can be kind of intimidated of you (but never publically admit it, more like hide it behind shady comments). lol the lyrics of the song playing right now in the background "make everyone hate me if that makes you feel better, your girl talks shit about me just to feel better" as you keep climbing up in your career/ reputation youre going to feel like a lot of more people are judging you. Accept that you cant control that. And if it makes you feel any better, it is envy/ hate but its to hide some jealousy and even some admiration as well.

♡‧₊˚🕸 TIP JAR ‹𝟹 ∙ 🕷

♱☾pile two☽

I heard "theres just no way in hell that this is all on me" the people you live with/ family (and in your hometown) could see you as the villain in those moments you are trying to express your emotions. You could get called being too "emotional" I heard "crybaby" or maybe even being called a hothead & impulsive when you try to talk to your loved ones about how you feel. You could be known for having a short temper or being very emotional (like the type to cry after seeing someone in pain or reading a sad news article). In reality, people close to you can get irritated with how emotionally intelligent you are. When you're angry/ upset about something your'e always determined to do something about it, and you start off by allowing yourself to feel your feelings. Accept that some people dont want to make room for you needs/ emotions. But then know when its time to refuse to give people more access to your energy and make sure you are meeting ur own needs. I just heard "I am worth more than these poor experiences you are trying to give to me"

♡‧₊˚🕸 TIP JAR ‹𝟹 ∙ 🕷

♱☾pile three☽

you could find that people in your neighborhood, apartment complex, or even the school you go to tend to turn you into the villain on the forms you communicate/ ask questions/ express yourself intellectual point of view. If you have siblings you could find that you get into frequent fights or bicker a lot. Youre eager to learn new things and that could throw other people off as you rush past them, ready to know more about the world. this pile reminds me of a curious child lol touching the "dont touch" sign. Out of all the piles this one feels more playful. Its like people suck their teeth and roll their eyes but youre so resilient. you bounce back in a way that feels so efortless that they dont stay too mad. its like even the people that see you as "the villian" at times are still secretly rooting for you? idk lol this pile was weird but also kind of endearing. Again, it reminds me of the way a child falls and quickly gets back up. Even if people judge you, you know that you have to keep it pushing. I just heard "in 5 years... shit, in 5 weeks none of this bs is gonna matter"

♡‧₊˚🕸 TIP JAR ‹𝟹 ∙ 🕷

♱☾pile four☽

people you get into close relationships with (friends, but especially lovers or even your crushes) can make you the villain for your "eccentricity." this pile gave off big Aquarius energty (it reminds me of those with aspects between venus and uranus). lol like your beauty and ways of being are very unique or quirky. honestly, those qualities (your forms of dress, taste in music, the weird things you say, random facts u know) are actually what makes people interested in you and start crushing on you. but then at the same time they judge you for not conforming to societal norms. It's like "I think you are unique and brave, but god cant you just be normal sometimes?" thats annoying! My advice to you is don't EVER let people treat you as if spending time with you was a burden and don't let people pick and choose when to hang out with you. watch out for when you have big groups of friends, you could find that 1 or 2 could be hating behind your back. You always stand out in the crowd and sometimes that leaves insecure people with a sour taste in their mouth. You could be someone that has a different religion/ ethnicity/ background in comparison from the rest of your peers (whether it be at school or work). lol alien superstar is playing in the background rn "don't ever waste your time trying to compete with me... no one else in this world can think like me'

♡‧₊˚🕸 TIP JAR ‹𝟹 ∙ 🕷

© plutonianeris🕸️🕷️

[rin-tezuka]

hello to the previous anons

i am one of the fabled "ex-4chan tgirls." i spent 15 years on there. oops!

i will not be beating the "loser" or "virgin" or "jobless" allegations. but other than that, i liked to post anonymously. that was it. its more fun to post when someone cannot try to pwn you with something you said three years ago. there used to be a whole slew of sites like this (420chan! ch6! bubblebbs! sushigirl! old saovq!) & i liked most of them for this reason

some time ago you were able to start a thread about whatever weirdo topic you wanted (eg photography or linux windowmanagers or low budget eastern european pc games) & people would see it and reply, provided u were on the right board. no need to spend weeks/months ingratiating yourself in whatever community surrounds it before you "earned" permission to have a little chat. it was Nice, much kinder to my agoraphobia than most pseudonymous websites. then august 2014 happened, then 2016, then 2019, then covid,,,,,, ah well

there are multiple people on /lgbt/. a good number of them are bad people but there are different kinds of bad people. extreme social isolation makes you an asshole. i will not try to disprove this - tumblr alone is evidence of it. but you can be an asshole hikikomori and also read your lenin! or at least listen to audiobooks while playing runescape or whatever... i dont understand why people think these are contradictory.

consider also that 4chan has better word filters than tumblr (full regex support w/ the normal browser extensions). for a long time if u played ur cards right u could spend a whole day on your favorite midtier boards and not see a single racist or *phobe (at least til past few years when some sharty dork found a trove of botched surgery photos & i finally had to leave). vs tumblr or twitter where u always end up seeing someone trying to epically dunk on a screenshotted terf or whatever. ofc this has changed over time and i find it unbearable now - the people i actually wanted to talk to/read posts from have gradually left as the soyjakparty+groyper generations moved in. theres nothing left of interest to me there. also, im old now. but i would like for people to recognize that "ex 4chan" does not mean "uses racism to cope" or whatever, the same way "i use tumblr" doesn't mean "i make homoerotic marvel movie gifsets and/or will kill you if you imply transmisandry isn't the defining issue of our era." conversation websites have multiple people on them. 4chan has multiple boards. each board has multiple people on it.

that said /lgbt/ is an extraordinarily bad board. transphobia from other trans people is laser targeted in ways mumsnet users cannot fathom, as i'm sure you're all aware. i spent less than a year there and im still paying for it psychologically. occasional cute screenshottable post aside it is functionally a proana forum, except your therapist has no chance of understanding what it is. +like proana forums it is almost more accurate to think of the people stuck in it as victims rather than criminals. you cannot understand what that shit does to your psyche until you are the one suffocating in it. only "worth" going there if you are doing shulginesque n=1 research on selfharming with the computer, which is not something you should ever do. but /mu/+/jp/ 10-15 years ago were Not like that. (i miss u /bleep/...) long post sorry thank you for reading death to israel i will get drunk now yay :)

.

[joannasteez]

"im with you" - installment two

featured characters: mother's milk & female reader. warnings: alcohol usage (misuse) and angst. MM being his supportive, caring self. mutual pining? (kinda) authors note: this second installment has been sitting in my drafts since the release of season three, so over a year maybe? i don't see myself progressing the story (sorry?) but i was tired of seeing this in the drafts. so i give it to you all who wish to read it!

You hate 'The Reserve', not just for its sordid means of molding into fruition false delusions of grandeur, but because it is also a reflection. A mirror, smudged and stained, bitter callousness webbing sharply from the heart of it, mangling its way to the furthest reaches, but a mirror all the same. And when the sun wanes low into the horizon, that bombastic need for liquid comfort livening up the bar, in the solace of yourself you say 'I am not like these people; degenerate drunks and reckless hedonist, bleeding the poison of a heartless raging machine who thinks them too low to even consider their existence. I am not like the super-abled, I am better'. The hatred is beautiful enough in those times, consistent enough that it waters the dust and forms thought into palpable word. Then where is this mantra now? As the weeks grow colder, air nipping sporadic bites into the skin, lethargy soothing something still and lukewarm into your veins.

Grief is loud, 'where is your mantra now?', and your need for comfort is as bombastic as theres.

On this unsteady line of desire, here must be where the attraction falls short for him. Clips its wings, falling from on high.

'He sees you', the brandy says, auburn and taunting. 'He pity's you'.

All those years ago when the ache was new, splitting raw and lethal at your chest, you're almost sure it was pity that drew him in, that made him linger. It had to be, or that's what the sluggish, drunken part of you thinks, the part that takes comfort in dark hard spirits and makes you believe all the untrue shit that stains the foreverness of wayward esteem and memory. But sipping from the bottle is good, it's easy, feeling like a drizzle of fresh rain on the skin. The burn goes dull after while, when the sky bleeds something angry and orange,  leaving just the smooth glide down the path of your throat, and when your eyes shut to escape the welling of tears, you hear that everlasting crunch of metal.

It's a hard piercing, that cringing screech and scratch of metal etching into itself, the friction tearing into flesh and bone, and just mere seconds remain before the face that shares your own fades into something distant and lifeless.

Twins, a true phenomenon, and yet as you stare into the bottle, it all feels false and unnatural, like retribution. Something beautiful and different, worth no more to the state than a cover up story and a check for $75,000.

She was worth more. She deserved more, true justice, and yet here you are wasting away, your stomach a pool of brandy.

Like clockwork your phone vibrates. 'Here comes the pity', you think.

--How you holdin' up?

His wonder is a grey text bubble, nothing more than routine and after several years still its consistent. Maybe that's why desire has etched into your skin so, a slow gradual drag into nerve, entangled to the pulse of your veins, because at least some semblance of him cares. Even if it is all just obligation, when others stopped their award wining performances of sympathy, he'd still roll around in the early cool of October asking 'Are you holding up?', and 'How are you doing?'

The tears and liquor screw your senses well, fingers slipping over some of the right keys and missing others. It takes a while to gather thought, and even then it's driven by lies and poor motor skills.

--Mi fi.

--Im fie.

--Fire*.

--Fuk Im fine*.

--Fuck*.

The disappointment is palpable, heavy on the tongue and an uncomfortable warmth to the skin. You know it, can picture the way those brows of his pull together, mouth screwed and on the verge of disgusted. Well fuck him, if he thinks you care, he isn't the one in pain, drowning in perpetual heartbreak. Saturated to the bone with it really and its ripping at you slow and dreadful, a vicious tear of tissue and vessel. And God-- but...but doesn't he know? No, no, no he has to, he's suffered similar... but it's not the same... but it is, you stress to yourself, it has to be... but it isn't, and the tears taste more salty as they come. An aged bitterness that makes you wince.

--... are you drunk?

You keep him suspended, seconds, minutes even.

--No

--A but,, Im ok.

--A bit but Im ok*.

He's quick to reply.

--Where are you?

He waits, with a staling patience just at the top floor of the flatiron building, where the city bustles and groans, exhausted and restless. In just a few measly minutes, still nerve goes erratic with impatience and then comes the hammering of his pulse.

You're drunk and alone, drowning in the memory of shitty circumstance. His chest aches in that familiarity-- Harlem and a blazing summer sun, the hard blow of barely cool air, a child's excitement and then the coming in of doom, Soldier Boy, and then the swooshing in and fatal crunch of metal-- the ache a vicious sting. Growing nails make slight indents in his skin, fingers coming into his palm, to ball and harden, to feel and never to forget.

He was lonely then, just a wild vengeance to keep him company.

Marvin moves before he can think, leaves, turns the key in his ignition and joins the hard rush of the city before resolution melts loose and hesitant.

Your Brooklyn apartment is old, as old as the house he loved destroyed by the hurling in of a benz, and as he breathes, alleviating the hard brick of tension in his shoulders, he understands why he's here. Why-- in the most inconveniencing of times-- he thinks about you. Why desire, a fervent stream in his blood, has become more ungovernable by the day. You are new but familiar. Soft and alluring but recognizable to the bone, a reflection of pain and survival that wholly scares him and excites him just the same.

When the door opens, it's the petulant embrace that catches him first, the bottle of brandy nestled in your palm, but the smell curls about the air bitter and heavy, unsullied by shame. Even in the most dismal affair, your eyes are blood-shot, daring him to go beyond whatever is shy and lingering, a plead to make the pain go away. To call out the itching twitch in his skin by name and validate its presence.

"What?", you start, feeling his eyes. The stony weight. "You're not gonna wish me happy birthday?"

"You're a mess".

You'd waited for this, hoped for it even, to have the burn and the break of desire collapse against you. For it to scorch flesh and that unrelenting part of the heart that says 'yes, i want him, need him', but it never comes. There is no fracture, even when he tears you open with concerned eyes, just the unreconcilable truth that if you are a mess, royally fucked up and drunk out of your mind, that you do not want to be. Not when or where he can see. Because there is no middle, no point at which allure and brokenness meet in a charming enough compromise... right? So this must be judgement then, 'you're a mess', the knocking in of the gavel.

The quiver to your lip is fragile. You are fragile. "If you're here to judge, you can fuck off".

The lone tear you give makes his heart squeeze. Maybe he shouldn't have led so strong, so exacting.  

He brushes in anyways, like a piece of him belongs here and steals the bottle from your fingers. Palms growing idle now, fearful, balling and releasing, grasping at air --like your whole being-- grasping at everything, anything and gaining nothing. Nothing but the soreness of muscle once bent about glass fighting for strength, for the will to straighten. All there is, is the leaning in of silence, as he cracks the windows for a fresh breeze, a hard press that leaves you scorching and loose with a raw bare boned awareness. The mantle of your belly churning and awakened with a sullen impatience to hear his words, the charge of his thoughts.

Wont he do it now?

"Just say it already", knotting pain in your throat leaving your urgency dry. Brittle. "Whatever straight laced bullshit speech you got about effective coping, and-and-and pain... and whatever the fuck".  The new air is chilling, makes the grate of your voice wane and shiver. "Just say it".

He's next to you, sinking into the couch, and it's the closest he's ever been. "What's the point of preachin' shit you don't practice".

"Drinking isn't effective coping but tearing through the city, through the damn country, offing supes left and right with Butcher is?"

You were both wrong, but so terribly right. The through-line of your lives, just narrowly escaping death, broken already but always seeming still to be on the precipice of breaking.

For some time there's nothing, no word or deed, and then, there's everything. A delirious unearthing, barbarous and desperate. 'Look at me, understand me, please', fragile, on the borders of begging. "I never meant to drink so much, it-it just happened I-", your tongue goes lax and dry from temporary thoughtlessness or the swimming and draining of liquor in your veins, you aren't sure. "I don't even like the taste but June she... she made it a thing. Our thing".

You look to him, and see through the blur of your vision, the forming together of intent and attention. No crease of pity, just tenderness and patience, without blame. Just understanding.

And then it's here, nostalgia, a wistful coming together again of memory. "My father liked to have his taste every now and then y'know... a little sip just to feel some shit I guess", you start. A finger pulling at and curling into another. "So he'd hide little bottles of brandy around the house. A stash here, stash there, but he'd always end up forgetting. He had shitty memory that way... still does", the knot in your throat grew, forming a choking sensation. "But June would find them  and re-stash them, so when our birthday came around we'd sip and get shitfaced together".

You can feel the build, a hard rushing in, the levee soon to break. "We both hated the taste, but we were doing stupid shit together and thats all that mattered".

She comes clearly in your minds eye, a replica yet different. Glassy eyes dazzled by the soft burning away of innocence. The liquor is strong on her tongue, makes her touch something tight to the skin, a holding on to that bites but comforts all the same, and the air is pungent. Rife with rebellion. In the shared bedroom of an old family owned Brooklyn Brownstone, the world opens, teems founded and un-conforming with the blazing of this single moment. Oh sister, my sister. She was your mirror, your opposite. Everything. "She was just here my whole life and now she's gone. What thing am I supposed to have that I can touch, that-that-that I can feel other than this, other than our thing".

Something in Marvin wonders, if he reaches out, forms you with his hands, will you take him in or stretch away? Will you break? Shatter into a fragmented loathing because he is not her. And there is the curt twitching in his finger, he feigns for the answer.

"You never told me that".

You laugh, mirthless and ironic. "I never told anybody because I feel like a fucking joke. I speech those kids to death almost every damn day, about being present and making room, growing in grief and look at me." Your head feels full and heavy, a sharp pounding meeting just at the forefront of your skull. "I didn't even have the fight to do anything about it. They took her away from me and I just let that shit fade. I let her go Marvin, me".

He pulls at your chin softly to face him, smearing away a lonely rolling tear. From here, just inches away, everything about him is tender and warm. But if you lean further into him, will he pull you in?, or will the comfort of his touch fall away?

It travels instead, holding firm at your shoulders. His eyes settling light and easy.

"You wanna go all Rambo with the shit, and find out what happened, I'm with you 100%, but what happened to June isn't on you, its not".

The brandy on your tongue wears old, the solace of it going stale.

'I'm with you'

His embrace is a furnace, a delicate purging. A new opening of the world.

"Thank you Marvin".

[libraford]

While I'm bitching.

I dont mean to make this a bitching blog, but with them leaving on monday I have time to reconfigure my brain about all of it.

We live in a suburb that butts up to a nature preserve. So we see all kinds of wildlife from coyotes to deer. Most of the wildlife pics from my photo blog are from a nearby park.

There are mice in the garage.

It's a garage. It's an unsealed part of the house that's safe from predators and snow. It's going to get mice.

She wants to live on a farm some day. But she sees a mouse in the garage and suddenly has to rearrange the entire space because the way 'we' store things is attracting rodents. But not the way she just leaves piles and piles of cardboard from chewy or her amazon purchases (seriously a $300 inversion table that she used once and used her partner's credit card to get).

And I dont have much choice in how i store my stuff because the day we moved in they had already decided there was no room for my craft storage (its ugly, basically.) And it all got shoved in the garage.

Where the mice are.

So she sees a mouse and spends the whole day freaking out and moving our stuff around because we're slobs who dont know how to organize our stuff.

And now we cant find anything.

About a year ago, she got on an exercise kick and demanded that I clear my stuff from the garage so they could have an exercise room for themselves. Me and pock are still sharing a small nook that serves as our craft room, and the is no space to really spread out. But she gets an exercise room.

She never exercises. She has a back injury that makes it difficult for her to sit up for long periods of time.

Like... I tried to clear the garage, but I got 4 bins in before I ran out of room in the craft room, and now there's no way for me to access the things in there, either.

So sorry she didnt get her exercise room. We have a porch. We have a living room where you can move the couch. You can go to the park. You have a rec center membership. Sorry you didnt get a poorly ventilated exercise room full of mice.

If I can do yoga three times a week in this house, you can figure it out.

Later, I overhear her talking to her mom on the phone about why she wants to move to North Carolina and she says it's because theres no nature here. Its barren. Nothing will grow in ohio because of the chemicals they use on the farms. Theres no wildlife.

I'm assuming the mice dont count. But our town literally calls itself 'the city of parks.' Theres over 5000 acres of green spaces including a waterfowl preserve and more than one refuge. My boss at parks and rec is a conservationist. My job is to water all the fucking trees we planted last year.

Youd see all kinds of nature if you'd get outside the house, but you never fucking leave.

Which is kind of a minor point in the scheme of things. But it really pisses me off like 'oh poor me I'm a fucking liar.'

I'm so lazy, I wont repurpose an entire room for her benefit while shoving all my shit in a 5×10 space. I'm so awful.

[gh0stsp1d3r]

hi!! could you do a tangerine fic where you have known each other a long time and you are working together on a mission and you bicker and fight the whole time and then when you get back to the hotel or house you’re laying next to him in bed (one bed ofc ofc) and you end up cuddling :) maybe it’s a regular unspoken thing when you’re on missions together, maybe not! i’ll let you decide :))

I love this request thank you!!

Is this a thing friends do?

No warnings, very fluffy 🙈

This is before the bullet train

You and the twins usually got partnered together, you guys fit perfectly. And you would admit, you had feelings for Tangerine. But you didn’t tell him, because you were scared he wouldn’t feel the same.

“Look, all I’m saying is that you don’t have to be an asshole about everything.” You shrugged your shoulder, as Tangerine rolled his eyes.

“Thank you! Someone had to say it.”

“Whatever. I just wanna leave this damn place.” Tangerine sighed, looking for a hotel.

“Well, we’re just gonna have to suck it up for one more night and we’re out of here. Everyone says that New York is fun, but all I’m seeing is rats and homeless people.” You stated, as you looked at your phone for directions to the hotel.

“What hotel did they give us this time?”

“They didn’t give us any. Budget cuts. But there’s one hotel we could stay at, I’ll pay, but it’s just Some small shitty one, all the others are taken up. Some convention opens tomorrow so everyone’s there.”

“Great. Just what I needed after a long hard week of work.” Tangerine groaned.

“Oh shut up. It’s only for one night, we’ll live.” Lemon said.

You snickered as you finally made it to the hotel. It was small, but it would work.

“Hello. May I h….” The older man started, but stopped as he saw the three bloodied and bruised individuals with snow on their heads.

“We need a room. Any room with at least two bedrooms is fine.” You stated quickly.

“Right.. Uh sorry, but we only have some one bedrooms. The convention is really popular.”

“Well, I suppose it’s fine… we don’t have anywhere else.”

“It’s fine with me.”

“Fine by me. I just wanna sleep.” Tangerine yawned.

“Here.” You said, sliding your card to the man, he still was confused but he didn’t wanna say anything. He opened a drawer and handed them a key.

“Thanks… you’re room 102. Anything else?” He asked nervously.

“Nope, that’s it. Thank you.” You said, as you all left.

“What the fuck was wrong with that guy?” Tangerine scoffed.

“What do you mean? I’d be scared if I randomly saw three people in suits walked in with blood and bruises and dragged in a bunch of snow.”

“I don’t like the way he was looking at you.” Tangerine narrowed his eyes.

“Im sensing a lovers quarrel.” Lemon sung, and laughing when tangerine hit him in the arm.

“Please, he looked like he was gonna shit his pants.” You said, unlocking and opening the door.

“Wow. You were not kidding when you said small.” Lemon snorted.

“Theres only one couch, and only one bed. Well what the fuck do we do now?!” You sighed.

“Well, the lady can take the bed, and I will sleep on the couch. I don’t know what tangerine wants to do.”

“Well, how big is the bed?” He asked. You felt excited at the idea of sharing a bed with him.

You went in the room to check. It was a queen.

“It’s a queen. So.. I mean I could share- if- if that’s fine with you.”

“Yeah, sure, I just wanna go to bed already.”

“Well, Goodnight guys. And if I hear any banging and I mean any-“

“Lemon!” You both groaned.

“Sorry.” He said and jumped onto the couch.

You and tangerine made your way to the room. It was awkward but you guys were friends, you’ve known each other since you were kids, so it shouldn’t be too awkward… right?

You got under the covers, and so did tangerine. You both just stared up at the ceiling. It was freezing, and it was snowing outside too.

“I’m freezing my bollocks off.”

You laughed quietly. It was uncomfortable to sleep in your work clothes, and the snow on your heads and clothes. had melted so it was just water now.

“I can’t go to sleep.” You muttered, turning to look at him.

“Me neither.”

You guys sat in silence for a little before making a decision to be brave.

“I have an idea.”

“Hm?” He looked at you again.

You moved closer to him, he looked confused but he wasn’t going to complain.

You looked at him.

“Is this.. okay?” You asked quietly.

He stared at you and blinked. ‘Fuck it.’ He thought, and went in to kiss you. You were shocked, but you kissed back. It was passionate and loving.

Your lips disconnected after a little bit, and you smiled.

“It’s more than okay.” He said, as he put and arm over you.

You wouldn’t be upset if this happened all the time, you thought.

“Hey, T?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.”

“For what?”

“Everything.”