#but there are things to love and things that are annoying in this. its mixed and depending on who you are it could go either way
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死 KKANGPAE | #03 死
† breakfast and training †
"His eyes are the kind of dark that makes you forget there was ever light in the world. And you hate that you're starting to notice details about him."
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⚔ chapter details ⚔
word count: 5.4k
rating: mature
content: training violence, weapons, strong language, sexual tension
☠ author's note ☠
HELLO MY FELLOW SLEEP-DEPRIVED CREATURES. Welcome back to another episode of "Kiki makes questionable life choices and writes fanfiction instead of sleeping"!
Can we talk about how I wrote like three different versions of the gun scene before my perfectionist brain was satisfied? And by satisfied I mean "fine whatever just post it I guess." Don't @ me about gun accuracy, I play Call of Duty sometimes that's research enough (ㆆᴗㆆ)
Also yes, I am absolutely living for the whole "oh no they're training together" trope. Sue me. Or don't, I'm broke. All I have is caffeine and the ability to make my characters suffer. Speaking of which - Jeon in combat mode? chef's kiss My boy is out there being all professional and grumpy while Y/N is just trying her best not to get shot. We love that for them.
PSA: The whole "Cookie" thing was totally self-indulgent and I regret nothing. V is here to cause chaos and honestly? Goals.
Special shoutout to my cat who watched me write this at 3 AM and judged me silently. You're the best beta reader a girl could ask for, even if your only feedback is knocking my coffee over.
See you next Tuesday, you beautiful disasters! Remember: sleep is for the weak and fanfiction is for life.
crawls back into writing cave while mainlining espresso
Kiki
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Mornings in the castle hit different. Through your window, the sky's doing that thing where it can't decide if it's still night or already dawn—all soft blues mixing with hints of gold. Everything's quiet, like the world's holding its breath.
Then your alarm goes off.
"Why did we agree to this again?" Yunjin whines from her bed, fumbling to shut up the annoying buzz. Her pink hair is a mess, splayed across her pillow like cotton candy gone wrong.
"Croissants," you remind her, stretching until your joints pop. "Fresh, buttery, heavenly croissants."
"Not hungry." She burrows deeper into her blanket cocoon. "Too early for hunger. Too early for existing."
You swing your legs off the bed, bare feet hitting the cold floor. "What happened to yesterday's 'new me, new goals' speech?"
"That was yesterday's Yunjin. Today's Yunjin chooses sleep."
With a snort, you pad over to her bed. It's literally two steps away—your shared room is cozy like that, with just enough space for two singles and matching bedside tables. You give her shoulder a gentle shake.
"And what's tomorrow's Yunjin gonna think about that?"
"Tomorrow's Yunjin's problem," she mumbles, death-gripping her blanket. Smart girl. She knows your next move would've been stealing it.
"Then it's tomorrow's me problem too!" You can't help but laugh, and it finally gets her to peek one eye open.
She lets out the longest, most dramatic sigh. "Fine. Fine. You win."
Your shared laughter is soft, comfortable. It's weird how quickly Yunjin became your person here. Maybe because she's as new to this as you are—no pressure to measure up to badasses like Chaewon or keep your guard up around intimidating figures like V and Jeon.
She joined two months before you did. For her, it meant saying goodbye to having her own room, but she says it was worth the trade-off. Girl's a mess when it comes to sleep schedules, but she keeps your shared space spotless and her determination is s̶c̶a̶r̶y̶ impressive. Like, you've seen her practice seduction techniques until 3 AM, and now here she is, dragging herself up at dawn for... well, croissants and self-improvement.
There's something genuinely good about Yunjin. She's always there—to help, to listen, to just be. Five months in and everyone in Seduction already adores her. Yeah, she's clumsy as hell during physical training, but her mind is sharp. Nothing gets past her—it's like she's got a built-in lie detector.
After yesterday morning's... incident, you're extra grateful for her company.
You both grab your digital cards from your bedside tables—can't go anywhere in this place without them. They're basically your whole identity here, determining which doors open for you and which stay firmly shut.
The castle corridors feel endless this early. Most members are probably still sleeping or doing whatever gang members do at dawn. Your footsteps echo softly as you and Yunjin make your way to the cafeteria, keeping the conversation light.
"Have you had breakfast here before?" you ask, watching her stifle another yawn.
"Once." She nods, her pink ponytail bouncing. "Got up at 10 though. Wasn't worth sacrificing sleep for."
You can't help but smile. "Early breakfast hits different. You'll see."
When you reach the cafeteria, Yunjin taps her digital card against the scanner. The light blinks green, and suddenly your nose is filled with the heavenly smell of fresh pastries. Inside, only a handful of early birds are scattered around the massive space. Makes sense—most people here prefer their beds at this hour.
Your eyes do their usual sweep of the room, casual and practiced. But then something pulls at you, like a magnet finding true north. Your gaze locks with dark, piercing ones.
Jeon.
"Oh, that's Jeon, right?" Yunjin's voice cuts through your thoughts. "Guess he likes mornings too."
You nod, still watching him from the safety of the doorway. Something about the distance makes you feel almost safe. He's got that thing about him—that unmistakable aura of authority that even 6 AM can't dim.
"Damn," Yunjin says after a beat, blunt as ever. "He's hot."
"Let's get food," you mutter, rolling your eyes and heading for the pastry section.
You and Yunjin load up your plates with a bit of everything, especially those famous croissants. Finding a quiet corner, you settle in to enjoy both the food and each other's company, pointedly not thinking about piercing dark eyes or brooding corners.
You try to look casual as your eyes drift back to Jeon for the hundredth time.
He's sitting there, both hands wrapped around a steaming cup of coffee like it's his lifeline to sanity this early in the morning. The sight of those tattooed fingers curled around plain white ceramic does something to your brain that you'd rather not examine too closely.
"You know, I heard something interesting about him." Yunjin's voice makes you jump. S̶h̶i̶t̶ Great, she caught you staring.
"Oh?" You tilt your head, hoping your voice sounds more curious than guilty.
Yunjin leans in conspiratorially, her pink hair falling forward as she drops her voice to barely above a whisper. It's kind of unnecessary given how far away Jeon is, but there's something about him that makes everyone speak in hushed tones.
"Apparently, he's got this whole... ritual thing going on. Every single morning, without fail, he makes sure he's the first one to get fresh coffee. Like, the first cup from a fresh pot."
Your eyes track back to that cup held between ink-covered fingers. Now that she mentions it, you've never seen him drink anything else in the mornings. The way he's savoring it, eyes closed and expression almost peaceful, makes you think Yunjin might be onto something.
"Every day? He's literally the first one here?" The mental image of Jeon lurking outside the cafeteria doors, waiting for them to unlock, is both hilarious and weirdly endearing.
"From what I've heard. Maybe it's a power move?" Yunjin suggests with a soft laugh. "You know, asserting dominance through caffeine consumption."
The idea of someone as intimidating as Jeon—co-leader of the Assassination Division, member of the Council of 9, literal professional killer—climbing the ranks of one of South Korea's most dangerous gangs just to secure his morning coffee makes something bubble up in your chest.. You have to bite your lip to keep from laughing too loud.
"Imagine that being his master plan all along," you snort. "Join gang, become assassination chief, get first dibs on coffee."
You both dissolve into quiet giggles, but the moment shatters when something shifts in the air. It's like thorny vines suddenly wrapping around your lungs, making it hard to breathe. You don't need to look to know who it is.
"Mind if I join the fun?" V's voice slides over your skin like honey laced with poison, playful but with that edge that makes your hair stand on end.
His arms drape over your shoulders without warning, caging you and Yunjin in what should be a friendly gesture but feels more like being trapped. Your muscles tense automatically. There's something about V that keeps you perpetually on edge—like admiring a rose only to remember it's got thorns that could draw blood.
Yunjin manages a wobbly smile, but you can tell she's as unsettled as you are by his sudden appearance. "We were just... talking about coffee."
"Coffee?" V drawls the word like it personally offends him. He pulls back, throwing his arms behind his head in that carelessly graceful way of his, but stays close enough that you can smell cinnamon. "Boring. Now, this new training program? That's something worth discussing."
His eyes glint with mischief, reminding you of a cat playing with its food. "I'm keen to see what you girls bring to the table. Should be... intriguing, don't you think?"
The way he says it makes your skin crawl. There's nothing overtly threatening about his words, but the undercurrent is clear—the Assassination Division isn't known for playing nice, and V seems to view the upcoming cross-training as his personal playground.
"I'm sure it will be enlightening," you say carefully.
V's energy is infectious, but not in a good way. More like a disease you're trying not to catch.
He chuckles, and those thorny vines around your lungs squeeze tighter. "Oh, I'm sure it will be. And don't worry, yours truly will be there to add a little spice to the mix. Can't let things get too dull, can we?"
Before you can respond, his attention snaps to something—or someone—across the cafeteria. With a dismissive wave that somehow manages to feel both elegant and insulting, he strides off as suddenly as he appeared.
You exchange looks with Yunjin, both of you sagging with relief once he's gone. She looks as drained as you feel, like V's presence alone sucked all the energy from the room.
"Well, that was... something," Yunjin says, and you could write a whole essay about everything packed into that single word. Her pink hair is still slightly disheveled from where V's dramatic entrance messed it up.
"That's one way to put it." You try to shake off the phantom feeling of thorny vines around your lungs. V's presence leaves you feeling like you've been through some kind of emotional washing machine—tumbled around and wrung out.
"But oh my god." Yunjin's whole face suddenly lights up like she's remembered something amazing. The whiplash from her mood shift almost gives you vertigo.
"What?" You ask, though part of you already knows where this is going. Yunjin might be shy and perceptive, but she's also a total simp when it comes to pretty faces.
"He is SO handsome?" Her voice rises with genuine awe. "Everyone kept saying he looks like a prince, but I thought they were exaggerating. They were not."
You raise an eyebrow, wondering if you were even in the same conversation just now. Sure, V's gorgeous—that's kind of his whole thing. The dangerous beauty, the dripping poison. But after feeling his aura wrap around you like a boa constrictor, 'handsome' isn't exactly the first word that comes to mind.
"Did you miss the whole creepy vibe?" You keep your voice low, even though V's long gone. Some habits die hard in this place. "He talked about the training program like he's planning to turn it into his personal episode of Squid Game. With popcorn."
"Yeah, but like..." Yunjin waves her hand dismissively, "have you seen his face? Those cheekbones? That jawline?"
"The way he's probably plotting our deaths as we speak?" You counter, but you can't help the smile tugging at your lips. Trust Yunjin to focus on the aesthetics while completely ignoring the red flags. It's kind of adorable, in a concerning way.
"Doesn't change the fact that he's eye candy," she says with zero shame, stabbing her fork into her breakfast. "Like, premium, expensive, imported chocolate level of eye candy."
"True," you admit, finally taking a proper bite of your croissant.
And it is true—V's got that whole ethereal beauty thing going on, like a masterpiece painting that happens to be slightly cursed. The kind of face that belongs in museums but also probably comes alive at night to terrorize security guards.
But even as you acknowledge V's obvious appeal, your eyes betray you, drifting back to that other corner of the cafeteria. Back to dark eyes and hurricanes.
Back to Jeon.
It's not like you mean to look.
It just... happens.
Like your gaze has some kind of magnetic programming that keeps pulling it in his direction.
Which is s̶t̶u̶p̶i̶d̶ inconvenient because the last thing you need is to get caught staring at one of the most dangerous men in Kkangpae while you've got croissant crumbs on your face.
The rest of your morning slips by without V popping up again to make your skin crawl. You try to focus on getting ready for what's coming, but your mind keeps drifting to the upcoming training.
Working with Jeon and V's division? Yeah, that's not anxiety-inducing at all.
When you step onto the training field outside the castle, the change of scenery hits different. After being cooped up in the gang's concrete maze, the open space and towering trees feel almost surreal. The cold morning air bites at your lungs—a wake-up call you didn't ask for but probably need.
Today's not just another training day. It's your first cross-training with the Assassination Division, and the tension in the air is so thick you could cut it with one of V's knives.
Your stomach does this weird flip-flop thing as you walk towards the gathering crowd. Working with Jeon after... that incident? Not exactly on your bucket list. The memory of your last encounter sits heavy in your chest, making each step feel like you're walking through mud.
The Assassination Division is already there when you arrive, looking like they stepped out of some action movie poster. Some look ready to murder, others look ready for a nap. But it's Jeon who catches your eye—impossible not to, really. It's like the air itself is swirling around him like a storm about to break.
He's got that look on his face—you know the one. All business, no bullshit, could probably kill you with his pinky finger.
No sign of V though.
Makes sense, when you think about it. Those two aren't exactly besties—more like two wolves forced to share the same territory. Their whole approach to killing is different as night and day.
Jeon's all about precision. Clean shots, minimal mess, maximum efficiency. He's the type to plan every detail, calculate every variable. Need someone taken out from two buildings away without anyone even knowing what happened? That's his specialty. The human equivalent of a surgical strike.
V though? He's chaos incarnate. Gets up close and personal with his kills, leaves a message written in blood if he feels like it. He's the guy you call when you want someone dead and don't care how messy it gets. Planning? Fuck planning—V works on pure instinct and improvisation.
The crowd goes quiet as Jeon steps forward. The atmosphere shifts, less like a raging storm now and more like the heavy air before thunder breaks. When he speaks, his voice does that thing where it demands attention without actually raising in volume. And despite everything—despite knowing better—you find yourself leaning in slightly to catch every word.
"Your state of mind is everything in this line of work," he says, dark eyes scanning the crowd like he's reading everyone's potential in real time. "A calm, collected mind can mean the difference between life and death."
The task he lays out seems simple enough: shoot the cardboard target, hit the center, don't mess it up. But as you watch others take their turns, that knot in your stomach keeps getting tighter.
The gun feels wrong in your hand. Not that you haven't held one before—basic training covers that—but this is different. This is him watching, and somehow that makes your palms extra sweaty.
Then your turn's up.
Walking to the mark feels like crossing a minefield, every step measured and tense. Your heart's going so hard you can barely hear anything else.
Focus. You need to focus.
But Jeon's standing right there, making the air thick and hard to breathe. Your finger hovers over the trigger, but doubt creeps in like poison.
The target blurs in and out. You can feel Jeon watching, that heavy gaze picking apart every flaw in your stance. The pressure builds in your chest until you're sure something's gonna snap.
Just a bit longer. You need to be absolutely sure before taking the shot.
It's not like Seduction gets much practice with actual weapons—your arsenal usually involves batting eyelashes and strategic flirting, not bullets and gunpowder. So it's no wonder the gun starts slipping through your sweaty fingers.
You tighten your grip. A surge of determination hits you like a shot of adrenaline. Come on. It's just cardboard. You've handled way worse situations than this. You can do this.
Your finger starts to squeeze the trigger—
BANG.
That... wasn't your gun.
You flinch, turning toward the sound before you can stop yourself. Through the corner of your eye, you catch smoke curling from Jeon's pistol.
He's standing there looking bored, arm extended like this is just another one of his daily mornings. The gun fits his hand like it was molded for him, an extension of his body rather than a weapon.
When your eyes snap to the target, there it is—perfect shot, dead center, because of course it is.
A̶s̶s̶h̶o̶l̶e̶ Show-off.
You lower your gun, lips pressed tight. His gaze sits heavy on your shoulders, hurricane pressure bearing down until you want to scream. His face gives nothing away, but those dark eyes say plenty—and none of it's good.
"If you're not quick enough, you'll get killed." His voice cuts like ice. "Let that be a reminder for everyone else."
The words hit like a slap. Heat rushes to your face—anger, embarrassment, frustration, all mixing together into something that makes you want to either punch something or crawl into a hole. Preferably punch him, but you're very aware of everyone watching this little show he's putting on.
Both divisions are staring, and you've never felt more like a fish in a very small, very exposed bowl.
Your eyes meet Jeon's, and suddenly breathing gets hard. His stare hits different—those dark eyes boring into yours like he's trying to read your soul, pupils blown wide in a way that makes your stomach do weird flips.
That silver lip ring catches the light when his mouth twists into something s̶e̶x̶y̶ condescending. He opens his mouth—probably to tear into you some more—but then—
BANG.
Everyone drops like puppets with cut strings. Pure instinct.
It's instant chaos. Voices rise into a crescendo of shouts and commands, bodies moving with practiced urgency.
It's kind of beautiful, in a messed-up way—how quickly personal beef gets shelved when shit hits the fan. One minute Jeon's looking at you like you're dirt on his boot, next second he's barking orders to keep everyone safe.
Your heart's in your throat as you scan the crowd for a flash of pink hair.
Yunjin.
But Yunjin's nowhere.
The sea of faces blurs together—no Kazuha, no Eunchae, not even Sakura. Even Chaewon's vanished, which is weird because she's usually got this sixth sense about danger.
Another shot cracks through the air. Your fingers tighten around your gun until your knuckles go white. Your eyes keep drifting to the treeline, where shadows dance between patches of dark green.
A calm, collected mind can mean the difference between life and death.
His words echo in your head, which is ironic considering how not calm you feel right now.
Fuck it.
You're moving before you can second-guess yourself, legs carrying you toward the forest. Maybe it's stupid, but you need space to think. To be calm, like he said.
Plus, the trees might give you cover—an advantage you desperately need right now.
The forest swallows you up. Sunlight filters through leaves overhead, painting everything in shifting patterns of light and shadow. Every step crunches on dead leaves, making you wince. So much for stealth.
V wouldn't be happy.
The chaos from the training ground fades the deeper you go, replaced by normal forest sounds—birds chattering overhead, small animals rustling in the bushes. It's almost peaceful, if you ignore the whole possible death situation.
You spot it then—a ridge overlooking the training ground, hidden behind thick bushes. Perfect vantage point, if you can reach it. The climb makes your muscles burn, but you manage. Up here, you force yourself to breathe slow and steady, trying to quiet your racing heart. Your fingers trace the gun's cold metal like a lifeline.
Your back hits the tree with a thud. The bark scrapes against your spine through your shirt, but you barely notice. Every nerve in your body is focused on that rustling sound behind you.
Footsteps.
Your breath catches. They're quiet—too quiet to be some random person stumbling through the woods.
No, these are the steps of someone who knows how to move silently. Someone trained.
Adrenaline floods your system as you press yourself flatter against the tree. Your fingers tighten around the gun until your knuckles go white. Through a gap in the leaves, you try to catch a glimpse of whoever's approaching, but the foliage is too thick.
Friend or foe?
The question pounds in your head with each careful footstep drawing closer. Your mind races, too many possibilities—it could be an enemy, could be another member searching the area.
Could be death or salvation walking your way.
The steps are almost upon you now. Your breathing goes shallow, controlled. You might be exposed up here, but they don't know that. Surprise is your only advantage right now.
Shoot or strike?
The dilemma tears at you. A gunshot would alert everyone to your location. And if it turns out to be an ally... F̶u̶c̶k̶ No. Hand-to-hand is safer. Quieter. Less explaining to do if you're wrong.
Your muscles coil tight as a spring. When the footsteps are close enough, you launch yourself from behind the tree in one fluid motion, aiming to take them down hard and fast.
Instead, you slam into what feels like a brick wall.
Oh.
It's Jeon.
His reflexes are insane—before you can even process who he is, he's already moving. The air sweeps around you as he twists, disarming you with embarrassing ease. Your gun hits the ground with a clatter that seems to echo through the whole forest.
Recognition hits you both at the same moment. That flicker of shock in his eyes quickly turns to his usual look of disdain, because of course it does.
Then—a misstep.
Your ankle rolls, sending white-hot pain shooting up your leg. You stumble, sucking in a sharp breath. His grip on you loosens just slightly, and something that might be concern flashes across his face before his usual cold mask slips back into place.
"You okay?" His voice is gruff, like the words are being dragged out of him against his will.
"Just perfect," you snap back, because fuck his concern when your ankle feels like it's on fire and your pride hurts even worse.
He just stands there, staring at you with those dark eyes that see too much.
"What the hell were you thinking?" A pause, one eyebrow lifting. "You have a gun, don't you?"
You almost laugh. Because of course. If you'd shot at him, he'd be lecturing you about trigger discipline. Attack hand-to-hand, and suddenly you're an idiot for not using your weapon.
You seriously can't win with this man.
"Well, good thing I didn't use it on you then." The words come out lighter than you feel, dancing between playful and pissed. "And what are you doing here anyway? Shouldn't you be back there playing commander?"
"That's what deputies are for." The casual way he says it makes your teeth grind. "Besides, I dispatched a team to check the gunfire. Just my luck, running into you instead."
"Pleasure's all mine, chief." You load the title with all the sarcasm you can muster.
"And you?" His dark eyes study you like you're a particularly puzzling target he can't quite line up. "Any reason you're out here instead of following orders?"
"Didn't get any orders to follow." You cross your arms, ignoring how his presence makes your skin prickle. "And that ridge over there?" You jab a finger toward the overlook. "Perfect vantage point. I was trying to be strategic before you showed up."
He actually grimaces at that, like your logic physically pains him. But before he can open his mouth to deliver what's surely another lecture, you add:
"Just my luck, running into you instead."
The words—his own words turned back on him—hit their mark. His eyebrow twitches just slightly, and satisfaction blooms warm in your chest.
Score one for you.
But before you can inwardly celebrate, he grimaces. He actually grimaces before he opens his stupid mouth again.
"That?" His voice drips with condescension. "You think that's prime real estate for observation?" The asshole holds back a laughter. "Alright." He says, and you ponder the merits of hitting him with a rock.
But then he begins walking, and you trail after him, partly because s̶c̶r̶e̶w̶ ̶h̶i̶m̶ he's wrong and partly because... well, where else are you gonna go?
"Remind me again—which one of us specializes in persuasion and observation?" You can't keep the annoyance from your voice. His arrogance is starting to give you a headache.
"And which one of us is known for sniping?" He tilts his head just enough for you to catch the silver flash of his eyebrow piercing. "You think I don't know a thing or two about picking vantage points?"
"Just because you can shoot from far away doesn't mean you know the best places to shoot from." The words come out sharper than intended. "What works for a sniper might not work for surveillance. They're different skill sets."
"How so?" He doesn't even bother looking back now. "A lookout's a lookout, smartass."
Your hands find your hips. "You know what? Ask me that again when you sit in on our cross-training. Might learn something useful."
"Learn from an ensign?" His tilt is mocking. "No—learn from you?" He lets out a low chuckle that makes your teeth grind. "Pretty sure it works the other way around."
"Forgot about Flower?" You can't help the snark in your voice. "She's a chief too, and I'm sure she'd love to put you in your place."
The exhale he lets out is so exaggerated it has to be for dramatic effect. "You're insufferable."
"Feeling's mutual, chief."
You trail behind Jeon through the darkness, trying to ignore how his mere presence makes the night air feel electric against your skin. The silence wraps around you both, broken only by your footsteps until—
A rustle in the underbrush.
Before you can react, his hand clamps around your wrist. No warning, no words—just the firm press of tattooed fingers against your pulse point as he yanks you behind a massive rock. You crash against him, bodies colliding in a mess of limbs and s̶h̶i̶t̶ startled breath.
You open your mouth to tell him exactly what you think about being manhandled, but his finger presses against his lips. Shut up. His eyes scan the darkness beyond your hiding spot, focused and lethal.
And suddenly you're way too aware of him.
The moonlight paints him in silver and shadow, highlighting things you've never noticed before. Like how his eyebrow piercing catches the light—two tiny beads of silver that draw attention to the way his brow furrows in concentration. Or how that lip ring glints when his mouth sets in that stern line you know too well.
There's a scar on his left cheek—barely there, really. Just a whisper of a mark that makes you wonder what story it tells. Your eyes drift lower, catching on the small mole decorating the left side of his neck. It's such a delicate detail on someone who radiates danger, like finding a flower growing through concrete.
But it's his eyes that f̶u̶c̶k̶ y̶o̶u̶ u̶p̶ catch you off guard. Dark and deep, framed by stupidly long lashes that flutter when he blinks. They're beautiful in a way that makes your chest tight—and isn't that just f̶u̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ fantastic? You didn't need to know that about him.
This close, you can see the tiny lines at the corners of those eyes. They speak of sleepless nights and heavy choices, of burdens carried too long alone. Watching him like this—he feels different now, less like a storm trying to drown you and more like standing in summer rain.
The realization hits like a punch to the gut: you're seeing Jeon. Not the cold-as-ice division chief or the intimidating Council member. Just... him. Human.
Complex.
His fingers are still wrapped around your wrist like an iron band. If anything, his grip's gotten tighter, and you're caught between wanting to yank free and being weirdly aware of how warm his hand is against your skin in the cool night air. It's hard to tell if you're feeling trapped or protected.
The footsteps draw closer—deliberate, confident. Not someone trying to hide.
You watch a muscle tick in Jeon's jaw, the kind of tiny detail you wouldn't normally notice if you weren't pressed so close to him. It's fascinating, in an annoying way, how he can look so calm while radiating such intense energy.
His eyes flick to yours for just a second, but it feels loaded with... something. Like you're suddenly partners in this mess, whether you like it or not. It's more communication than you've had in all your previous conversations combined.
The rustling gets louder. You hold your breath. Jeon's gone statue-still beside you, but you can feel the coiled tension in him. His dark eyes snap to a spot in the trees, then back to you with unnerving intensity.
"Shoot there."
You stare at him like he's lost his mind. "What?"
"There." His voice is barely a whisper, rough with urgency. He jerks his chin toward whatever he's seeing that you're apparently missing.
"You want me to shoot a tree branch?" The skepticism in your whisper could cut glass. "Seriously?"
"Just do what you're told." The words rumble out of him like distant thunder, crackling with impatience.
You give Jeon a look, but arguing isn't an option right now.
The gun feels heavy as you line up the shot. Your finger finds the trigger, and for a split second, everything goes quiet. The bang echoes through the trees, making your ears ring. You watch as the bullet hits exactly where Jeon wanted—that innocent-looking branch that apparently wasn't so innocent after all.
A net explodes from the darkness like some kind of ninja trap, shooting toward the approaching figure. But whoever it is moves like water—fluid, impossible, beautiful in a terrifying way. The net hits empty ground with a sad little flutter while your brain tries to process what just happened.
Beside you, Jeon goes still. If you weren't pressed so close, you might have missed that tiny hitch in his breath—the only sign that this wasn't part of his plan. His eyes narrow just slightly, that crack in his perfect mask making your stomach do weird flips.
He pushes you back against the rock, putting himself between you and whatever's coming. The stone digs into your spine, cold and rough through your clothes.
Then everything happens at once.
A shadow vaults over your hiding spot, moving with deadly grace. Gunshots crack through the night, and suddenly Jeon's shoving you down, his body covering yours. The world spins into a blur of motion and sound, your pulse drumming so loud you can barely think.
When reality settles back into focus, you watch the figure reach for their mask. Your fingers tighten on your gun, waiting to see what kind of threat managed to dodge one of Jeon's traps.
The mask comes off.
Oh for fuck's sake.
V's grinning like the cat that got the cream. "Paintball night!" he announces with way too much glee for someone who just scared the shit out of you.
Relief and irritation war in your chest. Of course it's V. Who else would turn a simple training exercise into their personal dramatic performance?
You watch Jeon's shoulders drop, but the annoyance is written all over his face. His jaw's so tight you can practically hear all the curses he's not saying.
Always the professional, even when he's irritated.
V's eyes dances with delight as he watches Jeon simmer. "Don't look at me like that, Kookie," he coos, lips curling into that signature smirk that makes you want to take a step back.
Cookie?
You blink, trying to process that nickname. Looking at Jeon—all dark clothes, silver piercings, and intimidating tattoos—the last thing that comes to mind is anything remotely cute or sweet. The mental image of him buying cookies from some terrified boy scouts makes you bite back a laugh.
Now that's a story you'd pay to hear.
Jeon's eyebrow shoots up in that way that somehow manages to say f̶u̶c̶k̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ more effectively than actual words. His tongue pushes against the inside of his cheek, jaw working like he's physically holding back whatever he wants to say. He's irritated.
"I'll give you some advantage," V sighs dramatically, thorny vines wrapping around your lungs even from this distance. "No fun beating you when you're unarmed." The words drip with amusement, like this whole thing is his favorite game. "See ya."
With one last unsettling grin, he melts into the darkness. Because of course he does. Dramatic asshole.
You're still sprawled on the ground, processing what just happened. Leave it to V to turn a regular night into some twisted paintball training session. The man's idea of "improving stealth skills" is giving everyone heart attacks.
Beside you, Jeon's muscles finally uncoil from their battle-ready stance. He looms over you, and you can't tell if the expression on his face is more annoyed or relieved.
"You gonna get up or what?" The words come out gruff, but there's something else there. Something that might be concern if you squint.
Then his hand appears in front of your face. You stare at it for a second, surprised. It's weirdly bare compared to his tattooed arms, and you hesitate before taking it. His grip is firm but careful as he helps you up.
The whole night feels surreal —one weird training session bleeding into another. You glance at Jeon as he stretches, working out the tension in his shoulders.
The mystery of "Cookie" tugs at your curiosity, but one look at his face tells you now's not the time to ask.
Some mysteries are probably better left unsolved.
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© jungkoode 2025 no reposts, translations, or adaptations
#jungkook smut#jungkook scenario#jungkook x reader#bts fanfic#bts smut#bts x reader#bts scenario#bts imagine#jungkook fanfic#jungkook imagine#bts jungkook#bts fanfiction#jungkook fanfiction#jk fic#bts au#jungkook angst#bts scenarios#jungkook scenarios#bts fic recs#jungkook x you#jeon jungkook x y/n#kgp#kkangpae
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this was a rq by anon
i saw ur artist!jean hcs OMGGG imagine a little pottery/ceramic painting date w jean im gonna cry esp w someone who doesnt do art and they think their art is lwk shit but he ADORES IT SM and swears he’ll keep it till the day he dies goodbye 😢
i just want to say i’m sososssooo sorry about this being answered so late :((
“cmon angel, don’t hide it from me.”
“it’s embarrassing, jean. especially for someone like you.”
“now what’s that meant to mean?”
˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊
he knew exactly what it meant. certified art lover since coming out the womb. half his camera roll could be dedicated to the numerous galleries he’s visited. the other half ? candids of you ofc!small and intricate tattoos hidden on his body, tributes to his favourite artists. his loft apartment looks like the inside of a interior design magazine.
so it was only natural that jean was a pro at the couples pottery class he signed you two up for. you, on the other hand… well, you were learning. he paraded his mug around with such childlike pride, yes, it was annoying, but it was tolerable when you saw your 6ft 2 bf look so adorable. “here, i want you to have it.” he ushered the mug towards you. his toothy grin stretching from ear to ear.
“really? baby..” a downward smile curled your lips and you felt the warmth of his gaze on you. “does that mean you want mine too…?” your fingers brushed the slightly uneven surface of his mug, its imperfections being comforting. your own mug would offer no comfort. it was a disaster: horrifically asymmetrical, with strange indentations and a handle that looked ready to break at any given moment. the only redeeming feature was the faint scratch of both your initials carved into the bottom. hidden, but intimate.
“i mean it would be cool, no pressure though.” he answers calmly, but there’s no denying the bubbling excitement in his eyes. he shifts closer, “you good, angel ?”
“mhm” you replied almost too fast. your words float out like they aren’t even yours. unlike jean, you weren’t passionate about art or anything tbh. you simply floated through life, picking up gardening to drop it after a week. have a a hundred acquaintances but struggling to maintain any further. sure, it was lonely but things were just easier that way. jean somehow slipped through the cracks and became a permanent member of your life.
you stared at your mug again. it was worse than you thought. you could feel the rough texture against your palm, the weight unevenly distributed, how aware you’ve now become of how untalented you are. your bf noticed how your gaze was fixated on the cracks running along the handle. “cmon angel, don’t hide it from me.” a teasing tone mixed with genuine curiosity and reassurance.
“it’s embarrassing jean, especially for someone like you.”
“now what’s that meant to mean?” his voice dropped, a little teasing, but you could feel the warmth of his hands wrapping around your hips. fingers lightly interlinked in front of your stomach. his stubbled chin rested against your shoulder, his breath warm against your neck.
you rolled your eyes attempting to wriggle out of his grasp, proving futile. the seconds that followed were uncomfortably long and quiet, forcing you to reluctantly show jean the mug. you turned your head to the side, far too embarrassed to maintain eye contact.
“i love it angel.”
you blinked, confused. you were expecting his usual sarcasm or even a teasing smirk. there was nothing. just soft sincerity you weren’t prepared for. “you’re lying, right? there’s no way you–“
“is that our initials?” he interjected, practically finishing your thought. his tone was light but there was something underneath it. something warm, something real.
“huh? oh yeah..” you glance down at the mug, surprised at your hearts tightening. “why do you ask?”
jean looks down at you, fingers tightening ever so slightly, “another reason for me to keep it.” he looks down at you with so much love and
“jean its–”
“if i throw it away,” his voice quieter, softer, teasing but something genuine hiding beneath. “its like throwing us away, you want that for us? ” you shook your head slowly, the weight of his words settling between the two of you. yes, the mug was a mess, but it had your initials. your names permanently etched onto the bottom, it had to count for something, right?“well then i have to keep it forever, don’t i ?” he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear.
“you’re so cringy.” you muttered, rolling your eyes. even as you said it, you tilted your head back and pressed a kiss to his lips, smiling between each and every kiss.
andddd scene !
miffy speaks- i don’t even know what to say 😭😭i’m so sorry i’ve been away for sooo long i’ve literally had no motivation + everything i wrote felt awful + school but this had me me want to start again so pls pls plssss any rqs or ideas or asks lmk it will force me to eventually write bc of the guilt lol (divider by @toastray!!)
hope you enjoyed !! reblogs + comments are appreciated !!
#𝜗𝜚#miffy-00#aot#jean kirstein#jean x reader#jean kirschtein x reader#jean aot#jean kirschstein#request#drabble#one shot#artist!jean#aot x reader#guys i’m so sorry#i swear i’ll be back on my grind !!
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[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled "immortality” after the poem by clare harner (more popularly known as “do not stand at my grave and weep”). the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]
a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”
#dinosaur#evolution#comic#prehistoric#animal#wildlife#paleontology#biology#poetry#comics#original#my art#archaeopteryx has no direct living descendants i know#but i wanted something aerial and the dinosaur to bird connection is classic and well known anyway#also the chicken over any other bird is very on purpose#its the mix of truth and comedy and genuineness and the fantastic in the mundane#its me asking you to see something so wonderful in something taken so un-seriously#and to love it both ways#also the jurassic park thing#where someone saw the reconstructed gait of a dino#and said. hey hang on. i know that walk.#and pulled up footage of a chicken walking#which jumpstarted the entire study into the link between dinosaurs and birds#in the end take whatever you want from it i just thought id provide some insight#i always like it when other artists do#the point is that i enjoy when people laugh at the end and when they dont#and i like it when they cry. i like it best when they both laugh and cry. eeaao intent#anyway mourn your losses but to live is to change#also hi guys i finally figured out tipping after 5 months so no more annoying ko-fi link#the antidote to despair is awe
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something something sewing event
#honami making leoneeds outifts / repairing shihos jacket and tsukasa sewing little clothes for bunny. win#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#honami mochizuki#tsukasa tenma#wxs#leoneed#I hate twt i love having everyone who slightly annoys me blocked or muted. sorry#NOBODY FUCKING KNOWS HONAMI LIKES TO SEW ITS MAKE ME MADE STFU ABOUT TSUKASA. MY FRIEND HONAMI.#holdee of both opinions that its a shame mixed events have been weak writing wise and also havent been used to their fill potential recentl#to have characters who dont normally interacted get to meet each ofher. And tsukasas writing in particular is hurting bad rn#But also pjsk fandom does have misogyny issues (Because every fandom does bc all forms of bigotry oremeate everything even shnconsciously)#Because its incredible that everyone ran to bat for tsukasa being in the event but i saw mobidy mention honami who also likes to sew ..#she even says in a card story that she wanted to remake All of leoneeds sekai outfits in real life since theyre stuck in sekai#Idk ive been oeeved about this so i must rjn to my oersonal disry (tumblr tags)#also I need honami and mafuyu interaction proper like what the fuck is going on. there could be the chance for very interesting growth if#clpl would give them the chance ..#tldr It is really annoying when clpl constantly forgets shit about their own characters 😭😭😭😭#/ seems too scared to let mixed events be Actually kmportant to the story / characters rceently. Which is crazy#esp for wxs whose entire thing is about how other people have shaped them and how theh wantnto touchnpeoples lives 😭😭😭😭😭aWhatever YAP OVER#But i love shizuku so im not complaining about anything other than who keeps inviting len
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my chemical tober :D
#listen. the good name was already taken!!!#but yeah im super proud of this i spent a lot of time making the prompts and the design#probably wont get used too much since im personally using the#regular inktobers from 2019 bc i want variety. but it was fun to do#maybe ill double up with them once or twice. regardless mcr stuff is really good for b&w so ill probably be doing it def at least once#mcr#my chemical romance#my chem#mcrmy#i brought you my bullets you brought me your love#ibymbybmyl#three cheers for sweet revenge#tcfsr#the black parade#danger days#danger days: the true lives of the fabulous killjoys#emo#2000s emo#art prompts#inktober#prompt list#inktober prompt list#inktober prompts#inktober2024#i tried to mix it up as much as i could with the order of them but i couldnt resist being fanciful with the last few ones. also the fact#that it starts at romance and ends on mcr5#im also proud of how some of these really can have a lot of interpretations. esp demo bc i first thought of it like demo tracks but it can#also be demolition lovers#and solo can be an instrument solo or solo careers. prob the goofiest thing i put in was pbatvm but yeah i couldnt resist#also no matter how hard i tried to find a unique tag realistically that ones gonna get overlap and its going to be annoying telling which i
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As I said I would, I drew my oc with yours my beloved @clawdouobit
My pretty girl likes to infodump your pretty girl about the smallest things. She's like a reel, talks a lot but most of it is meaningless.
Close ups and more info because I can't shut up ehtier under the cut <3
20 years old and engaged to a half-foot. They're waiting to gain some more money to get married and leave the dungeon. Note: they're best friends but idk if what they have going on is truly romantic love or just a very good friendship.
Quite skilled at upper levels, but wouldn't go to lesser levels. She isn't skilled enough to make her party survive there.
Her race is a mix between gnome and half-foot. Idk if that's possible but I don't think it's not.
If I had to guess, she's 13/14 on half-foot standars. It's unclear whether she's an adult or not, but she's preety mature most of the time. Most.
Flushed cheeks always. Also very pale.
She's 109 cms tall, a lot more than avarage on haflings, but lot less than avarage on gnomes. Since she hangs out mostly with haflings, she's a giant woman. This gives her some problems with traps so her BMI is 18 due to diet.
Fwens with Shahad. Who knows why tho. We gotta figure that out ;}
#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#delicious in dungeon#dunmeshi oc#dungeon meshi oc#never thought i'd make an oc for a fandom again but here am i#shahad is so cool#she wears pretty jewlery#i love her design so much#but i hate drawing kobolds ooouugh i struggled but did it :')#they're so fwens#the divorced traumatized kobold and the little to-be braid she found while dungeoning#pimpacci can shut up when asked. for about 10 minutes at least.#i have 2 other dunmeshi ocs i made alongside her but i think Shaad would get along better with Pimpacci#because she's really kind and caring. but doesnt realizes her talking can get tyring/annoying.#while making her i noticed all haflings cover their necks on the dungeon. i wonder why. i gave her a scarf to match the thing#shaad#pimpacci lukes#i had so many trouble coming up with her name#i had to make it sound like two names mended together that don't tire the tounge because its too long to say it..#she gets really annoyed when someone calls her “Pim” because of cultural things.#also. she's often infintilized. many hafling don't know she's a mixed race. so she just looks taller and more childish than others her age#it doesn't bother her. she doesn't realizes most of the time. she doesnt infintilizes herself on purpose. she's just younger on perspective#yay#i need shahad and pim to have late night hours talks. it would be so interesting..#i should be asleep lol#my oc#my art#i've made a mistake on shahad eye colour... too late but... grr ...
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well that was….. A Movie
#i have too many thoughts. unfortunately#its kinda hard to see this so long after it came out bc the humor feels soooo mid 2010’s and its debatable how well its aged#all i know is personally i feel like the dc mvoie#*dc movies have done a better job in recent years doing this specific r rated humor focused anti hero stuff#also like i for one love a comedy and love things having a humorous streak#but this is like a really standard grey action#*movie but then it puts all the humor on one character and that doesnt worklike at all lmao#like the really good parts are when hes with the other 2 funny characters (the bartender and the old lady)#they also like didnt do enough at all with lampooning superhero tropes? like at all???#it would have been so easy to have a standard superhero#movie but just lampoon it the whole time and instead they just… had that movie and like idk#fmcndkfndk like???#one of the few saving graces was in universe acknowledging that deadpool is annoying lol#but yeah generally it had a lot of ELEMENTS of good stuff just. not mixed well together#this truly is the granddaddy of reddit movie tho#like its not le epic win bacon bc thats more early 2010.#this is like. those milennial cookbooks that are hiphopified by just adding swear words. for some reason#torn bc i feel like i should judge ppl for this being so popular but im like not surprised that it would have mass appeal#on the surface i get the appeal of ‘a superhero BUT HE CURSES OOOOH’ and just generally taking things less seriously#it just sucks that the entire rest of the movie takes itself perfectly seriously#but not enough to have weird little annoying plot holes#also cant rly judge the guy who said he loved these movies hes a nerdy 38 yr old mild mannered white man. this was made for him.#this is elder milennial dadsk Wells For Boys
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dot dot
#ive come to realize something. ive always had mixed feelings on guys and ive realized my feelings now#basically; im not someone who hates men but i tend to be highly critical of them compared to how i am with women#like i always found the man hating feminists annoying and never agreed with their unhinged takes.#but there were certain aspects of guys that i could never shake off being uncomfortable about#there are of course exceptions. i love my bf for who he is#but even then i still have problems with him which is literally not even about him; its his male friends he has.#what also doesnt help was learning more private things about my bfs brother and how he treats the women in his life...#i now have a pretty negative perception on him too#and i think its just...bias? i know im not being fair thinking this way and i wish i didnt#guess my experience with the men in my life growing up made me this way...
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do you think Leo is a misogynist
nope and i'm not just saying that because he's my favourite character. calling leo a misogynist is just objectively ridiculous; the most "misogynistic" behaviour he ever exhibits is flirting awkwardly and thinking of himself as a casanova but even then when he gets put in his place it's not like he gets angry or violent or even all that upset. it's clear that his flirty behaviour is just another coping mechanism that can manifest negatively like, say, his bullying frank. he's best friends with piper, is intimidated by annabeth, and becomes close with hazel and reyna. all characters with which he has completely normal and meaningful interactions with. frankly i don't get at all how people see him as some raging misogynist—the most he has is a minor sexism problem that is typical of most teenage boys, one that even percy has.
tldr; no. nothing leo does is ever that serious.
#leo valdez#heroes of olympus#this is an ask with suspiciously good timing considering what i saw on twitter today#which i think ill post about actually. just to be a hater.#anyway yeah nothing leo does in hoo is ever bad enough to be classified as misogynistic#the most his behaviour does is slightly aggravate the girls#and he doesnt have any inherent discriminatory beliefs about women#compare that to for example sylva1n—another character i love who is most definitely more of a misogynist#HIS actions actually result in far more serious consequences compared to just annoying girls slightly#(the women he dates actually get emotionally toyed with and hurt)#and HE actually has beliefs about women that are hurtful (though he admits that its nonsensical)#but those beliefs influence his actions and how he treats women around him#now leo? doesnt do either of those things. of course because its not the point of his character like it is to sylva1n's#so consequently its just not something about leos character to. yknow. worry about.#like i said: at most he's just got a case of the teenage boy flirt combined with “whoa strong women exist?”#but the idea that he actually hates women is. laughable lmao.#ricks not capable of writing that kind of protagonist#anyway anon i am SO sorry for this rant. holy shit.#i even threw a fire emblem character into the mix im sorry fksjsks#in my defense you asked me about LEO VALDEZ and also im a sylva1n liker so i have lots of thoughts about misogyny in characters#but yknow apologies are due anyway 🙏 forgive me#ask#thanks for the ask :]#riordanverse#meta
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bro don't you ever get tired of caring what other people think about some fictional dudes? you get so heated about shit that doesn't matter, you gotta just chill out sometimes. live and let live or whatever. i genuinely think it will make you a happier person
?? sorry for spam reblogging too many mischaracterisation complaining posts in a row lmao ? that's like. majority of the heat you're seeing from me if you aren't a mutual. aren't you tired of flanderising and woobification lol ? i block tags and avoid those fandom spaces and don't actively spend every moment thinking nefariously thinking about how fandom bitches are wrong - but when it sucks, it sucks! bitches are wrong! especially when its the whole fandom's perception of it and, yeah, i can complain about it! i heart complaining! shit can be annoying and i can not like them and i can complain forever! and hey if it sucks here? can always hit the bricks
otherwise, erm... i heart being a hater forever and ever. i heart getting pissy at things that don't matter and i heart bitching to my friends for a couple minutes before cooling off. my fandom is me, my mutuals, and my inbox.
#askberg#anon#rambleberg#ugh.. too longwinded for a post about fucking fandom but who give a shit#somewhere someone is rethinking about their perception of shit#i love canon. and apart of the appeal of fandom to me is picking things apart and analysing and knowing so much#and THEN putting them in situations where its different... but its Makes Sense or it aligns with things in canon#not molding mix-and-match cookie cutters from characters and placing them in cookie cutter scenarios#i can be a big big stickler for canon but that just shows more love to the source. no?#i'd be less pissed off if anyone ever actually showed comprehension and understanding of the source material before going off and frolickin#btw i'm a hater .. but im also a hypocrite. both. always. i do things wrong and i do annoying shit but who even car
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(falls to the floor holding my head in my hands) i can't keep making all my ocs the same vaguely eastern european vaguely indo carribean mixed race guy i cant keep doing this
(looks up. eyes glowing red. levitating with unknown power) or can i..................................................
#sorry to be mixed on main again but im working on some rough draft ocs. i saw myself making the same dude again. i keep making him.#i know as a kid with a combination of the classic mixed kid feelings of alienation as well as being really really into cartoons#i vowed to myself that I SHALL make all the mixed race cartoon characters since i wasnt seeing much in the cartoons i loved#it was a little dire in like 2008 when i vowed this. its less dire now#maybe i can rest.....or maybe not...maybe its still more dire than i think............#im in an interesting place rn living in a somewhat diverse area attending a pretty multicultural university so i got used to#kind of blending into the crowd but recently i was in an art history class. like one of the first i had been in person in years#(you know how it is) and outside of my vaguely ambiguous situation there was like one other non white person#and everyone else was white. and it became very apparent how white the class was very quickly because as art history students#race is kinda like. a big thing in visual culture studies HJKFKJLSDJD and like they meant well but it was getting a little dire because#so many of my white peers kept centering whiteness and white discomfort in like every discussion or brushing past the topic entirely#im biased because race is one of my main interests in art history but MAN i was like. oh god. i need to. intervene#gotta be more annoying about being mixed race in class. rolls up sleeves#gotta bring up every uncomfortable topic about representation and perception and power and dehumanization and intersectionality that i can#because no one else but me the other student of colour and the professors even think about it orz#sorry i know its obvious but sometimes it doesnt quite hit me that like. oh god. do white people really not think about any of this?#at all? unless its brought up? not even a little bit? i dunno its just kinda alien to me orz but i shall keep going#i shall continue on with my deep interest in orientalism within art history and its impacts we see daily#and also making the same guy in my funny little cartoons DJSKHJKSJFKD#(jkjkjk i dont JUST make that same vaguely beige guy. i also make a bunch of other guys. who are also mostly all multiracial too HGKJDHJFR)#(its what i do. its what i do)
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i did the "autistic teen doesnt understand hes supposed to stop trick-or-treating" thing and i am STILL mad about it. why cant i keep doing that. my anxiety finally got the best of me and my last trick-or-treating was when i was 17 when i dressed up as Hooded Black Figure and didnt speak so it was harder to tell i was 17. but also theres several other things i just never "grew out of" and still see absolutely no reason to make myself stop so this is just one of them
#posts#every time my dad sounds surprised that yes i still have and intend to keep my big horse ive had since i was a baby. like bro#bro. i love that thing. i use her like one o fthose candy cane shaped pillows pregnant people use#unrelated to honse do u know how annoying it is to decide how to word ur post when its about traits generally recognized as autistic#when u know damn well you are not autistic you just have a mix of trauma and whatever else that makes you act the same#describing myself as autostic is often just the easiest/shortest opiton
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okay... I've only got sojiro rank 10 left and futaba's at rank 7... let's just hope I don't get fucked up by turning down the romance route
#☢️.txt#roz replays p5r#i have 4 days for futaba left im p sure?#so. assuming i dont get completely fucked over by atlus making all the girls desperately in love with you regardless of if it makes sense#i SHOULD be fine#hopefully. chihaya will save me.#genuinely tho it irks me so much that futaba has a romance option#the rest of the game treats her like your sister. sojiro specifically asks you not to date her.#sojiro + futaba + joker are referred to as a family!!!! theyre treated as family!!!!!! what the fuck atlus!!!!!!#also i get so annoyed when ppl use the excuse of 'adoptive siblings arent considered siblings in japan'#yeah and adopted children typically arent viewed as actual children either. the game is pretty clear thats fucked up.#very annoying when ppl pull the 'in japanese culture' card on the game about why a lot of japanese culture is actually Fucked Up#ik most p5r players probably havent spent hours reading translated interviews and reading academic papers on japanese sociocultural issues#because theyre not Actually Insane but i still get mad. esp when its stuff the game... literally addresses?#like the stuff around ann i get. the game doesnt go into how 'european features' are heavily fetishized in japan#nor the nuances of being mixed + foreign/percieved as foreign. bc it assumes the player Knows Those Things#so it makes total sense why a western player wouldnt get why ann being white passing isnt... really a good thing for her#but like. the issue of how adopted children in japan are treated comes up THREE SEPARATE TIMES.#futaba and akechi BOTH mention how fucking horrific the japanese foster system is#yusuke mentions how he has madarame to thank for his life... because he couldve had it worse in group homes#sojiro's entire confidant is about how he's a father despite having no biological children#gah. it bothers me sooooo much.#btw i did not read academic papers on japanese sociocultural issues JUST for p5r. i also did it for ace attorney.#a lot of overlap actually since AA is essentially commentary on how jpn courts fucking suck and falsely convict people
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I've been having a specific thought all day and now it's 3 am so you know what that means <3
#my posts#.. look its not like its bad#its not good but its not bad either i think#it implies. stuff thats a big bad but. the thought itself is. okay?#its like.#i love people around me and i care about them and i want them to be okay#and im always fucking baffled when i realize they can actually feel the same about me?#they can love me like i love them and care for me as i care for them?? fucking wild#it's. hard to accept#ive said something similar before i think#i just struggle a lot accepting people can feel now for me then hate or tolerate me#they can like me and enjoy my company and maybe even love me? hard to believe but what do they gain by lying it has to be true and. damn#... it's driving weird lmao it gives me mixed feelings!#partially bc i like knowing i am liked bc of course but also. why would you do that to yourself lmao#this is when it is actually bad: i do feel like i am unlovable and if you fell in my trap you will notice soon enough#what trap?? being annoying???#.... even when people tell you youre not annoying but you can't take that one out of your head lmao but still it's#... it just doesn't make sense and I'm just waiting for them to see the world as everyone else does and notice it's not worth it i guess#that i will make whatever mistake i seem to always make that makes people don't like me or that this thing idk about will fuck it all up#... even if people do seem to like me or at least be okay with me being around or i manage to put myself out there#but i really can't shake off the feeling im annoying no matter what lmao#that one post about being the mutual that's always grieving was the last push to actually post this lmao bc it's been in my head all day#bc I'm always mourning what i fuck up enough that it doesn't even happen or what is happening but i will make it end by fucking it up lmao#... man. fuck it. i just wish i had a more functional brain and not one that was like this#.. i should go to sleep says like 3.30am
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Hnnnnn i want to write i want to write SO BAD I've been in such a depression funk but god i crave making something i love writing so much my head is so full of ideas and idk how to talk about them or to who!!!! Cursed with too many thoughts, truly
#bc all of my ideas are mixes of stuff#and most of my friends dislike at least half of the ideas#so i can't go to anyone with the ideas bc everyone wont like tjem and i kust wovkrkvkekfkd uuuggghhhh#this isnt a diss on anyone!! i love my friends♡#im just stuck bc im trying so hard to not bother anyone or bring up things they dont like#but i feel completely caged up rn#i have no place to spill my thoughts and its driving me nuts#i dont want to be annoying#sky talks
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Helloooo I've added a link to the 2014 live action movie Skatten i Lama Rama on archive dot org, it has English subs hurray!!
[The Main Crew] [The Villains] [Landlubbers]
Maybe you're simply just curious and want to check it out, maybe you're looking for something specific, or maybe you're a Norwegian looking for nostalgia. Does it matter, not really. Here are the links:
[Updated 30.11.24]
Let's start off simple with the music
This is my Kaptein Sabeltann playlist, it has all the songs available on Spotify right now, in the best quality I could find, semi-sorted from most to least popular (so i recommend turning off shuffle). This is a simple starting point and I recommend you check out the music first. Especially if you want a quick and simple way to see what the deal is about without looking at any of the other media.
Kaptein Sabeltann's official YouTube is also a great place to start since it's available worldwide. Lots of music videos filmed directly from the stage, as well as Kaptein Sabeltanns Sjørøverfest at Chat Noir in Oslo and Drømmen om Sabeltanns rike (They're cheap even for Sabeltann standards, but they're there if you want them.)
The main 3 shows (filmed in the early 2000s directly from the stage) are available on NRK TV for free, but you're going to need a VPN to get access (NB: I haven't tested this myself so it might not work). They also have the first ever Kaptein Sabeltann show that kicked the entire thing off, and that show should be available worldwide. And the follow up to the original show, Hemmeligheten i Kjuttaviga, is on archive dot org
The official viewing order is as follows (the main canon shows are highlighted in bold): Skatten i Kjuttaviga, Hemmeligheten i Kjuttaviga, Grusomme Gabriel's Skatt, Den Forheksede Øya, Jakten på den Magiske Diamant.
NRK TV also has the entire Kaptein Sabeltann TV-Show (14 minutes per episode + 26 episodes). It's a prequel to the main shows and follows Pinky in Abra Havn, but it's not required to watch first. (You're also gonna need a VPN for this one too if you're not in Norway.)
If you don't speak Norwegian, good news! 3 Kaptein Sabeltann movies have all been dubbed into English as well as many other languages: Kaptein Sabeltann (2003) (Animated), Kaptein Sabeltann og skatten i Lama Rama 2014 (Live Action). And Kaptein Sabeltann og den magiske diamant (2019) (Animated). I've linked to their IMDB pages in case you want to find them in your language. I don't have links directly to the movies, you may have to go the route of Kaptein Sabeltann to watch them hint hint cough cough 🏴☠️
Since writing this Skatten i Lama Rama (2014) has been uploaded on archive dot org with English (and Norwegian) subtitles.
#and norwegian subs obviously#kaptein sabeltann#about the movie uhm. you might find this awful you might enjoy it i cant tell. im insanely biased obviously#but there are things to love and things that are annoying in this. its mixed and depending on who you are it could go either way#there is a fart joke 5 minutes in this that really kills the vibe it was setting up but thats to be expected for a kids film#just trust me and keep watching#ANYWAY please tell me if you watch it!! i like it when people check out Sabeltann because of me#hey. look at me. do you know. how hard it was to get those norwegian subs??#could not find them online. had to use 2 separate programs to rip them alright. i want appreciation for my hard work#AND the english subs. which were online but REALLY out of sync so i had to manually sync them myself.............#and because its subs i found online it is the english names:/ im not editing all that im not THAT insane
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