#but then if im doing all the work and starting on my own time why is this a group thing lmao!!! anyway
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gojobbg · 2 days ago
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friction | reader (f) x crush!nanami pt.7
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pairing: reader (f) x crush!nanami
synopsis: [AU] you have always had a crush on nanami. since the day you were hired as his personal assistant, you've been right at his side combating numbers and making money within the finance department for the company you two worked for. but, things take a turn when nanami catches wind of your feelings, and rejects you. little did he know the weight of his mistake.
warnings: angst, heartbreak, sexual tension, jealousy (future smut)
a/n: im back!!! with part 7!!!! (i hope i tagged everyone who asked to be in the taglist). thank you all for your patience, and for your kind words from the last part! it brought up my mood entirely :) im sorry im so repetitive, but truly i am grateful. i hope this is well written (looked over it like 8 times)
all parts: pt.1, pt.2, pt.3, pt.4, pt.5, pt.6,
December | Tokyo, Japan | Wednesday 
It was around 2 A.M. when Haibara grudgingly entered the small speakeasy. 
It was a small, cozy bar inside the facade of a greasy burger joint, which Haibara gladly ordered from. He peeled the wrapping of his hot smash burger like a banana while making his way towards the back of the restaurant. The bar was separated with a curtain, and it was immensely dim. The only goers were a few guys in the corner, and Nanami at the bar itself. Haibara squinted through exhausted eyes about 4 empty cups near Nanami’s folded hands. 
Drunk, are we? He thought. 
Haibara casually laps at his greasy fingers, crumpling the wrapping paper with his other hand as he strolled over to Nanami. With a now somewhat clean hand, Haibara pats on Nanami’s shoulder. “You look like a loser, and I’m tired. Why don’t we call it a night right now and do this some other time?” 
“I can’t sleep,” Nanami begins quietly, wagging his finger in the air to beckon the bartender. “Please, two on the rocks.” 
“Whiskey? Tequila?” 
“Anejo, dark rum, please,” Nanami requests, bringing his hands up to his chin to rest on. He was pensive, but somewhat lost, as Haibara noticed the distance in his hazel orbs. It was unfamiliar, this version of Nanami. 
Haibara grimaces, already unenthused by the selection of drink, “we work in a few hours, you know. Are you sure we want to drink this much? Because I’m not.” He passes the crumpled burger paper to the waitress that came over.
“I’ve seen you come into work after getting black out drunk, and run on an hour's sleep. Sit.” Nanami grabs the seat next to him and pulls it out for Haibara. His close friend stares at him skeptically, but takes a seat. 
Haibara begins to take off his coat, the warmth of the bar melting him completely. Draping it over the back of his seat, he rubs his hands together, preparing himself for the night. “I’m never a responsible drunk, I can admit that. But you… this isn’t like you at all. What’s going on?”
Nanami emits a shaky sigh, trying his best to keep himself relaxed. But even slightly drunk, nothing to waive his nerves and the weight of his sporadic thoughts. “I feel like… I’m going crazy,” Nanami begins quietly, his eyes not daring to leave the bar. The two requested drinks make its presence known as they sat before the two men. “I just don’t understand why.” 
“Let’s start with what happened,” Haibara begins. You called Haibara, once again in tears while you explained what happened just a few hours ago at the steakhouse. You fall asleep with that same woe, allowing Haibara to nap for a few hours until Nanami calls him up. “Did something happen between you and Y/N?” 
Nanami raises his eyebrow, “how do you know?” 
Haibara’s tongue was too slick, “Y/N came back down by herself, and returned to the office because you gave her ‘extra work.’” 
“I could have, for all you knew,” Nanami huffs before taking his glass. 
“You came back down and didn’t say a single word,” Haibara grabs his own glass. “Whenever you were spoken to, you’d shake your head and say ‘repeat that.’” 
“All of a sudden you want to be meticulous,” Nanami murmurs before taking a sip of the dark brown booze. He looks up to meet Haibara’s eyes, which were stern and looking straight through Nanami. The blonde gives in, and carefully puts his cup down. “Y/N and I had a talk.” 
“Clearly.” Haibara downs his drink immediately. Might as well get drunk while Nanami was paying. He waves at the bartender and silently asks for another round. “Give me the rundown.” 
Nanami adjusts the collar of his crewneck, clearly becoming a bit shy, “No need for all of the details. Y/N, she um…- she confirmed the rumors regarding her feelings for me. They… aren’t just rumors.” 
Haibara had to bite his lip to keep a smile from forming, “is that right?” Nanami’s eyes narrowed down at his glass, staring at the large ice cube slowly melting. The struggle to keep from smiling disappears when he realizes that this wasn’t Nanami. “I assume you rejected her? Like you always do.” 
Nanami grimaces, looking away as if trying to shield his expression from Haibara. It was almost like… he was lamenting all his decisions that led him to this point. “...I did.” 
“So, what’s wrong?” Haibara starts, his words emitted slowly as he wants to carefully tread this new side of his friend. “You aren’t interested in relationships, Kento. Was there something else that happened?” 
“N-no, it's… exactly that, actually,” Nanami hums, his tone ornate with perplexity. “I rejected her… and it has made me unsettled since.” 
“What makes you unsettled?” Haibara asks, curious over this new side of Nanami. “You can’t reciprocate her feelings, so you rejected her. She can’t blame you for being honest.” 
“A-and, that’s the thing, right?” Nanami runs a hand through his hair, closing his eyes a bit. He’s drunk, Haibara noted. “I was honest, and told her… not really politely, but I told her I did not feel the way she does. But now, I feel like I’m losing my mind.”
“Alright, let’s make this easier for the both of us,” Haibara sharply interrupts. He slightly slams his glass down, gaining the eye contact of his dear friend. Guilty hazel eyes meet his own, but they don’t flicker away. “Just tell me what’s bothering you. Let it all out.” 
Nanami stares at him for a moment, fixing his eyes on each of Haibara’s. He could feel the pit in his stomach, working with the feeling of his drunkenness. His body felt hot, but goosebumps danced along his skin as though he was freezing. He could feel his cheeks warm, not just from the ethanol, but from his unaddressed feelings. Feelings that he’s not even aware of. Feelings he didn't even know he had. 
“I…” Nanami begins hesitantly. He downs another glass of liquor, a growl-like sigh leaving his dry lips. He was working up the courage to admit what was bothering him, but the conflict of why was keeping him silent. Haibara noticed this and quickly tapped his friend's shoulder. “Hm?” 
“Bartender,” Haibara calls, “two cups of absinthe, please.” 
Nanami lets out a chuckle, despite his feelings, “what do you know about absinthe?” 
“A lot, actually,” Haibara amuses him, “you’re not gonna get me fucked up without having at least one sweet thing.” 
“Absinthe is gonna fuck us completely,” Nanami replies, genuine laughter leaving him. A rare curse coming from Nanami. The two cups arrive, which both gentlemen take one. “You know it’s not that sweet… and it’s diluted.” 
“Just drink,” Haibara hisses, the two lifting their cups and downing the alcohol. They immediately cough, leaning against one another to suffer the coughing and the laughter that follows. “Shit, I always forget how strong it is.” 
Nanami covers his lips with a closed fist, laughter running around it, “it’s watered down for a reason.” 
After the sea of laughter calms, Haibara nudges Nanami. He could tell they were both tipsy, Nanami more so as he was here for an unknown amount of time before his arrival. “Please, tell me everything that’s bothering you. Better to get it out of your chest than keeping it in and suffering that.” 
Nanami gulps, but finds comfort in his friend's words. Haibara was right. He called him out here to do exactly that. And Nanami would feel worse if he dragged Haibara outside just to not confide in him. Carefully putting down his cup, he straightens his back and clears his throat. The liquid courage must not go to waste. 
“I mean… what am I bothered by?” Nanami whispers. The tip of his index rubbed along the rim of his glass. “We’ve grown up together, Yu. You’ve never seen me with a woman, nor was I ever really interested.” 
“But?” Haibara’s curiosity saunters with the alcohol in his system.
“I guess what really bothers me,” Nanami hums quietly, “is that of all the women I’ve met. From our school days, from outings, from work– it’s her. Why… is it her?” 
“Is it bad that it’s her?” 
“It’s not bad– not at all,” Nanami quickly says, “but how come I’ve become so taken by her? Without even realizing it? Am I that out of touch with my feelings?” 
Haibara chuckles at Nanami’s small panic, “it’s not that you’re out of touch with your feelings, Kento. You’ve never had these exact feelings to begin with, so this is foreign for you.” 
“But… as people, we aren’t that acquainted,” Nanami’s eyes lowered to his hands. “I don’t know anything about what she likes, her family, her hobbies. How can I like someone I know nothing about?” 
“Let me put it in a different perspective then,” Haibara suggests. “What are things that you like whenever you two work together?” 
Nanami looks up at Haibara and pauses for a moment. Then, his lips part, “I like that she always does things exactly as I request, even before I ask.” 
“She’s quite the assistant,” Haibara agrees. 
Nanami nods, “she is detailed in her work, extremely meticulous and doesn’t let any detail get past her.” He doesn’t pause at all this time, and keeps going. “She always knows what I like to have. I come into work knowing she has my cup of coffee, and wait for her to tell me what I want for lunch because I need not tell her.” 
Haibara fights off a smile. It was extremely relieving to see his friend finally like someone. It was almost destiny that life had kept his heart dormant until now. Until you. 
“I like that she’s honest without being rude,” Nanami says slowly, the ends of his lips forming a soft smile. "She has a sweet tooth, but she wanted to try my coffee after I confided its context to her.” 
“She has a good head on her shoulders,” Haibara concurs, encouraging him to keep talking about you. 
"I like the way she pushes back her hair whenever she has to deal with a more tedious task. And the way she smiles whenever she finishes all of her work for the day."
Haibara was cheering for you in his mind.
"I like..." Nanami begins hesitantly. "...that she's my assistant, and nobody else's." Haibara felt his own feels warm from his admittance.
Nanami finally feels his body go completely hot, his chest taking on the most warmth. He could feel his smile tickle his own cheeks, insistently forcing him to cup his mouth. It was overwhelming– realizing that he was wrong this whole time. He lied to you when he rejected you, albeit his newly discovered feelings. His free hand cups his chest, feeling his heart pumping at a speed alien to him. 
“Yu,” Nanami begins quietly. He looks over at him, face suddenly pale, “I think I’m having a heart attack.” 
Haibara finally breaks, and starts laughing. He quickly wraps his arm around the blonde man. Haibara leans his forehead against Nanami’s, soothing his nerves from the simple gesture. “You’re not having a heart attack, Kento. You’re drunk and feeling things we both didn’t think you had.” 
Nanami nudges him off, rolling his eyes. “It wasn’t like I’d never like somebody,” Nanami huffs, bringing his cup to his lips to sip at the watered-down remaining alcohol. 
“I can’t even count in 20 hands how many women you’ve rejected in the many years that I’ve known you,” Haibara scoffs. “You are sculpted like a Greek god, and yet somehow you’ve managed to waste it until now.” 
Nanami shoves Haibara a bit, but chuckles escape his lips. Haibara joins him. It felt like to have such a heart-to-heart, especially with someone like Haibara. Nanami raises his hand to the bartender, pretending to sign a check in the air. “I’m so sorry for keeping us so late for my foolishness. But, thank you very much for being my friend, Yu. I know it hasn’t been easy, but I really appreciate it.” 
Haibara rolls his eyes, “you’re right; it has not been easy, and I deserve to be compensated.” He then laughs through already soft words. “But honestly, it’s no biggie. I’m glad that you actually feel comfortable enough to talk about this with me. You’re usually one to keep to yourself.” 
Nanami’s drunk smile remains, “that’s fair. But please feel free to call out if you don’t feel well rested. I can absolutely vouch that you had a family emergency.” 
Haibara held his chest, his eyes full of surprise, “the work-obsessed and policy-abiding Nanami is willing to lie for me? You really do love me.” 
The bartender comes with the check, and Nanami reaches into his pocket for his wallet. Although under the influence, Nanami couldn’t get rid of the smile on his face. “Yeah, well. I asked you to come out, so this is the least I could do.” 
Haibara watches as Nanami tosses his credit card onto the bill. “But I have no plans of leaving you on your own tomorrow. We gotta really seal the deal, and finally be finished with our clients.” 
Nanami nods in agreement, watching as the bartender returns and collects the closed bill. “You just reminded me that I should send an email to both Marketing and Sales to warn them about our new clients.” 
Haibara nods, “yeah, they’re a bit much, aren’t they? Especially with how they stared at Y/N at the restaurant. Weird pervs.” 
Nanami, without meeting Haibara’s eyes, says simply, “it was why I didn’t let Y/N assist me during this time. A bird informed me about their crude manner with women.”
Haibara chuckles, but immediately stops and looks over at Haibara. All the dots were connecting like the stars in the Big Dipper. “No wonder you kept mentioning that Takada shacho assigned you his assistants. I thought you kept saying it to boost your rep!” 
Nanami shows a cocky grin, “that’s a given. But, I didn’t want Y/N to be a victim of that. Especially now that I understand what I’m feeling– I don’t think I would have acted decent.” 
Through slurred words, Haibara chuckles, “you’re so whipped, Kent.” 
“Whipped?” Nanami looks over at his friend, innocently tilting his head in confusion like a pup. “What does that mean?” 
Haibara gets off from his seat, his body warm and stomach satisfied. He lifts off his coat from the seat, and begins to pull on the sleeves. “Come, I’ll tell you outside.” Nanami signs the check, and retrieves his credit card. 
Walking slowly behind Haibara, Nanami couldn’t help but feel something. It felt like the cross between relief and anticipation. Suddenly, he felt at ease about the future, almost as if his unrecognized worry was now washed away. He felt hopeful that he could remedy his mistake, and start something new… with you. 
Of course, that won’t be easy, as you were currently sleeping with a hollow, broken heart. 
Taglist: [Now Closed]
@blossomedfloweroflove @numblytemporary @everyoneandtheirmothers @animechick555 @inthedarkshadows000
@m-arj-1 @julk4e @hadassery @swoozleee @angxlsatvrn
@v1x3n @s-witch-bitch @furgusonn @watyousayin @thechaoticarchivist
@simp-manhwa @5sos-wdw @ffyona1214 @phantombaby @evangel44xxcds
@ukiyodestiny @jasminelee324 @eurydxceorphxus @moonlightazriel @s3rp3ntsssc0ve
@dusty-dweller @wifenanami @bokuatsubro @ayesayman @starry-eyed--dreamer
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gooperts-gunk · 3 days ago
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post-qsmp q!bbh's story so far...
back to back we have had new q!bbh story pieces, on mythcraft with lilithluvsya and as mr. x on arkanis, so im going to write down all of my own notes of what we have learned so far + my crazed theory talk :) this will be long!!! note: this is from the perspective of someone who doesn't know mythcraft lore and the only arkanis lore i know is from what i pick up in passing lol. i will do my best!!
starting with the halloween special on mythcraft with lilith and rurus in which bbh helps lilith solve a puzzle that leads to her finding and adopting a new child, we get to see an actual bbh summoning!! im unsure if the treats are a necessary offering or just a kind gesture, but the soulfire-esque flames or wisps seem to be a very specific detail...
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the chant lilith says is "hear these words, hear my cry, spirit from the other side! come to me, i summon thee, cross now the great divide!" implying that if he's summoned, chances are, he was in the underworld or somewhere else. later on during technical difficulties, lilith mentions that "i don't even know the state of his soul at the moment! because usually whenever i summon a chant through those words," she repeats it, "his soul just acted a bit... weird! he usually doesn't act like that whenever i summon him. usually, the magic feels a bit more smooth, and it was very choppy this time. his soul just felt different from the last time i saw him. i can't put my finger on it." it's hard to say what exactly this means, (i've seen some people think it's about how he died with a split soul, he never got the other half back from purgatory as far as we know...) as we've never seen him be summoned before, but in this case, he just showed up on the chest crying out a confused "HELLO...?" but later on says "i could sense something was off, that's why im here." with his trickster confidence. he also mentions he's "been around, doing my thing. im very busy," and no concrete answer is ever stated. another detail is that halloween is said by lilith to be "the veils between our world meet once a year," meaning as far as we know he can only be summoned on halloween.
when he accepts the treats and attempts to leave he says "im trying to get back home!" a place of residence for q!bbh is implied, whether or not it's one we know of or even if it's an actual house is uncertain. when bad comes across a haunted house he says "oh my gosh! i had a house like this once, only it was red." which might cross out the place of residence being on the island. might, considering the house was later changed because most people hated the red lol. when bad is downed from fall damage lilith comments "why are you so fragile?! you're not usually, like, this breakable." bbh says "oh, as soon as i die, i get to go back home, so..." since we know how !bbh deaths work, (he can only perma-die once from a unique death, e.g. the combination of soul vulture infection and nuke radiation slowly ate away until perma-killing that version of himself, which means it was an entirely unique instance of death. so it's safe to assume that ever since he had fallen, he would have perma-died from simple things like starvation, but then can no longer perma-die from it again, with a possible exception of if it's starvation along with something else at the same time) we know that him dying wouldn't be enough to bring him 'back home' if it's implied to be the underworld or the mind desert, therefore, it would mean that if he dies during a summoning that the connection is immediately broken and he's back to wherever he was at the time. he's sometimes even excited whenever he gets downed, even saying "take me! take me home!" either because 1. he just really wants to get home for some reason or 2. he just really doesn't want to work for lilith.
but, we know he doesn't HAVE to work for lilith, because lilith states at the end after he's left to fellow mythcraft member nex that, "you know how im a witch? ... WELL... a long, LONG time ago... i made a mistake with my magic and i MIGHT have summoned a greater demon who turned out to be a TRICKSTER demon instead and KINDA reversed the contract on me and NOW im stuck with him until i die and i have to do his bidding whenever he comes around, but only whenever i create the first kind of contract for him to flip around. and he kind of... is around, and changes rurus a lot, and i have to work to make sure that rurus can transform back into a human one day because they're stuck in their bunny form..." which is a LOT to digest and she said it all in like two breaths lol. so in reality lilith is stuck with bad, not bad being stuck with lilith, and bad could peace out whenever he wanted because it's trickster demon rules and on top of that he can also transform humans into bunnies??!!
going back to where my previous notes were, when they arrive at rurus' house and bad seeing a painting of himself with 5 cracked eggs around him, he exclaims, "what the fudge is that?! THAT'S CRAZY!! who's the monster who made this??" meanwhile lilith is oblivious to whatever this means. he also steals the painting. rurus shows up! (rurus says he smells like sulfur, which is definitely the 'demon smell' ak!bagi mentions once she has a moment to speak with him after the chaos) rurus mentions making the painting and it was likely a gag that bad wasn't supposed to see during the lore stream but it's there now LOL and bad repeats the same horror to them as they're oblivious too, "it's you blowing up the moon! all the moons that you've blown up?" "oh, yeah, im sure it's blowing up the moon!!" he says in angry sarcasm, and then sobs a little. "i had eggs once..." both lilith and rurus inquire, and lilith is the one to say "you became a father?" in myth!lilith's defense, the residents have a lot of adorable baby creatures they care for and might sooner assume the eggs in question are cute creatures LOL "well i just said i had eggs, so..." "oh, you hatched them?" "ohhh he HAD eggs- lawren, he- he hit menopause, he said something about that..." I HEEHEE'D. idc if it's just a goof and not entirely canon im keeping it in here.
later on, when the trio complete the puzzles and find a well-decorated baby ghost named willow inside a willow tree, bbh's behavior to willow is very endearing and also straight-forward, casually offering some steak that he stole from rurus' house. he finds the way out of the tree for them by hearing a raccoon's chitter, and lilith comments "you're really good at talking to raccoons for some reason..." and rurus pokes further with "did you have a special relationship with a raccoon?" "yeah i- i speak raccoon." this of course is brought up from the perspective of both of them knowing his lore out of character and wanting to poke fun, but it's also a fun coincidence that it was a raccoon, as raccoons are very special to pomme. it starts storming, and rurus tells bad to give willow his hood but alternatively gives willow his soul lantern instead since his hood is a "...non-removable item...".
when they bring willow back to lilith's house, he continues stealing like he has been since he was summoned, but this time he takes a cookie from a cookie jar and passes one to willow before taking one for himself. when willow thanks him and says she loves cookies, he gives her another and says "you can never have too many cookies!" which would immediately make you think of his kids and their cookies, dapper especially as they're a total cookie fiend. as willow settles in he teaches willow the first and only lesson he's given to her so far: "whenever someone invites you into their home, you get to take whatever you want!!" he goes upstairs and shows himself and willow around lilith's house, rurus mentions a gaming chair, of which was a toilet. bad takes it and says, "i know someone who would love this!" which of course would be richas' gaming set-up that had a toilet for a chair because of a prank, if i remember correctly.
bad asks where his room is, making an assumption that his summoning meant he was going to move in. when lilith says he could stay at rurus', REALLY not wanting him here, he says "i can't have a room at both??" like the greedy little man he is. <3 willow is then shown her own room, where bad then proceeds to place the furniture he stole from lilith into the room for her.
the birth certificate is revealed! willow is lilith's daughter, and bbh is her guardian demon. (many were unsure if he was a parent to willow but lilith clarified on twitter that he's a guardian demon that will show up from time to time) rurus inquires if HE scribbled his name there, and he says "no, no! that's crazy. that'd be ridiculous." in a bit of a liar voice.
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when he accidentally picks up willow's sign, he courteously says "im sorry," and gives it back, prompting rurus to tell lilith she could just ask and he'd give her stuff back. when she does in a cutesy way, he dodges it entirely by saying "no hablo inglés" and when lilith demands for the furniture in spanish, he says "i don't speak spanish". i wouldn't call it entirely parental as willow's not his kid, but as you can tell bbh has shown far more care and respect to this child he just met than his contractors. the trickster has priorities!
they tuck willow into bed, and bbh falls asleep standing up, when lilith starts shoving him saying it's time to get him to bed, he wakes up suddenly, yelling "night terrors!! night terrors!!" we know he's gone long periods of time without sleeping, but he's having night terrors when he does...
bbh has technical issues, and during that time, rurus and lilith have a back and forth about him and their contract which is summarized in the bout with nex above. rurus says "you know, i used to be able to swear before i knew him, and now i can't." "huh! that's a weird incantation." this itself is likely a joke about their out of character friendship, but they come up with the idea that he might have a literal swear jar that he puts people's swears in, never to be said again lol.
lilith decides to keep the portal open as bad loses summoning connection to their world (aka technical difficulties) so he can visit whenever he likes to be a guardian demon for willow.
this wraps up the mythcraft section of new q!bbh pieces! onto arkanis!
a lot of people were unsure if mr. x would be q!bbh, but it becomes VERY clear based on how he acts with familiar faces, and some late night conversations...
not much to note when bad / mr. x greets fit, but there's a very silly familiarity when he says he'd like to take fit out to brunch right before talking about torturing him... yeah sure man why not O_O when fit asks if he's considered being GOOD and not murdering people, bad says "i considered it, but my therapist says i should embrace my hobbies. im trying to listen to my therapist more." so he at least had a therapist in recent times to tell him this, because on quesadilla island when asked about therapy, he mentioned something along the lines of that he tried therapy once, but he'd get chased out of town by people with pitchforks.
to briefly dissect the cutscene, from what i've learned, bad floating is a sign that he's powerful in valigma! only people with magic in valigma can float, examples being araldo when we get to see him later, and also bia raux who is also brought up to bad when telling him the current lore after the event. also. the manor. the banquet. i love you builders, it's so eggpire-coded. that man can't escape the aesthetic of red vines even if c!bbh tried LOL and another fun detail, he has ghosties/souls bursting around him! it's become integral to his character :)
when mr. x encounters the brazilians and his escaped captive fit, all the fantasminhas float around him! it's super cute that the grim reaper got little ghost sidekicks, and then doesn't even recognize that they're ghosts <3 he mostly called denix a gremlin or goblin, but that's because out of character he DEFINITELY knew who the admin was, that's why he bullied them so much and not the others lol.
even though he's having fun annoying everyone as mr x., bad still takes moments for the little ghosts, like spam crouching with amora when she creeps up to him, him and denix bonding by killing a penguin?? and playing songs on the flute and they all surround him and dance. :)
when the find the button room starts, and bad does his npc voice, bagi immediately starts yelling, knowing the "you got this! you can do it!" all too well, and bad keeps saying it in recognition. while it was already true that ak!bagi is a continuation of q!bagi, this interaction itself can be enough to assume that mr. x is q!bbh if he remembers it like she does. when it's revealed it's a find the button room, she's even MORE distressed, "are you responsible for this? please- please tell me you don't..." "i would never!" he says like a liar, and then maniacally laughs. bagi also frequently calls him "bad" and not mr. x unlike mostly everyone else, seeing through the silly alias.
one interesting detail is how hungry mr. x is for totems!! every once in a while he'll mention how he wants more totems popped, in the valigma cemetary / cemetario do valigma, he asks quel for how many totems they have, when they say a hundred, he says "passa tudo!" and drops mobs on them. he really wants totems for some reason!! does he absorb something from it or did he just really hate foolish that day? lol
once the event is over, bad and bagi get to talk! bad becomes uncle to amora, bagi's daughter. amora is immediately very sweet to bad! bagi catches bad up on what's going on in valigma, telling him about araldo and bia, and bagi thinks because he's a demon that he could help the specialists understand and handle the magic themselves, "you see those pink blocks glowing that way? they're like some of the magic powers that this land has, but we can't just touch it and start doing magic all the way through the town. so, basically, there's powers everywhere that we don't know how to use and those two entities fighting each other, they use different kinds of power. so maybe you, being a demon and stuff... maybe you can teach us how to handle this." which, upon mention of him being a demon, he deflects by admiring a streetlamp. bad didn't act this way with lilith and rurus because they were already aware he was a demon since they summoned him, but he never confirmed anything to bagi other than the vague vastness of his age and his immortality, if i remember correctly. which is more than he's confirmed to other people!
bad points out bagi's smoking, "you've taken up smoking, im guessing it's been really hard?" "yeah! yeah, no, that was because, the things i lived before, you know..." "yeah i understand..." "it caused me a lot of trouble." if im correct in assuming this is about the island and losing the kids... :( which bad then segues into asking if there's an ikea. LOL
when jvnq starts taking bad to pac's house to steal furniture, he says "oh wow! you guys are all nice and close together, i like this. yeah, i hate having to walk really far." knowing that q!bbh tried really hard to get people to live close by to him when he was dying so someone would take care of his kids recontextualizes this as living far away being a regret he still holds </3 (not to mention, cc!bad himself regrets building his bases so far away)
when pac says he'll give bad more muffins and furniture if he teaches him how to fly and such, bad deflects by saying "yeah! it's easy, you just got to... you got a- you got a nice view!" and looking at the black hole outside his house.
later on, when bad gets transported by araldo, they seem to get along nicely and araldo wants him to do MORE chaos at some point, which i believe is worrisome if it's true that araldo is the problem in the fight between araldo and bia raux... but also very fitting for him. meanwhile, sent back to his friends, he has only good things to say about him, and also inserted some of his silly lies. the entire interaction feels reminiscent of the times he'd talk about the 'eyeball guy with the snatched waist' aka the watcher, or even cucurucho to a certain degree LOL
when gabe takes bad to space, bad comments that it's a first for him! "the moon is just like i imagined it'd be..." congrats !bbh for having your first moon experience, at least, as far as you can remember!
meanwhile, transported to the mr. x manor, bad gives a dizzying tour to gabe, denix, and amora! he introduces the skeppy room when asked about his bedroom, mentioning he doesn't really need to sleep, and he instead meditates on top of the skeppy. (someone PLEASE feed this man dapper's special cake recipe) he also introduces his chair and i have no doubt that people have shown a comparison of his chair here vs. his chair in the hall of grim but i'll put it here anyways lol. he's also very consistent because the vod i went to to get a screenshot of his hall of grim chair is the near exact same "and this is my chair..." when he introduces it.
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when bad, gabe, denix and amora are in the maze that the experts + fit went through to get to the cemetary, they stop at a corner to chat and gabe asks bad "changing the subject a little, if you had a son now what would his name be?" (possibly more gender neutral than the translator says, which is how bad interprets it,) this likely was on the mind because a bit earlier while exploring the manor, denix asked him to give him a second name or middle name and bad hadn't answered. bad stops to think about it, before prefacing "well, i- i've had kids over the years, a couple, but you're saying if i got a new kid, right? what would i name... him... probably... how do you say 'gremlin' in portuguese?" it's the same, but alternatively gabe offers "duende." meaning denix's second name is probably duende now LOL but more importantly, for the first time, at least directly tonight, q!bbh was reminded of his children. gabe contextualizes why he asked, "it's because in this city... anything can happen, you understand? one day you're single, and sad, and the next you have a family." "no, that's true... yeah. i- i understand what it's like, one day you just wake up and you got kids, i totally get it... and then everybody dies, and you're left alone." OOGH. EEYOWCH. we don't know for certain how long q!bbh has been living after escaping quesadilla island, or if even in the end cc!bad is planning that he escapes at all, he might still be bound to it. but however long it's been, he's been carrying onto the weight of everyone disappearing, with only strange creatures (the bunnies, the penguins, cucurucho...) to keep him company once everyone is gone. gabe inquires about if his family died, and he covers up with "oh, no, im just saying that's the inevitable. that's what happens, sorry." ...top 10 sentences that are more depressing when contextualized by an immortal demon with a heart too big for people to comprehend... :( something that bad misses here is denix asking if he wants to adopt amora, but this comes back around!
transported again, while gabe walks bad towards the boat the experts arrived on, he says "valigma keeps many mysteries and lots of trouble, right? fights, in this case many fights, problems, death, pain, suffering, and then we decide to have a child despite all these problems; how can this be, right? it's a weak point." bad says "yeah, love tends to lead to lots of problems..." which would be specifically commenting on taking care of children. and from the perspective of his current situation, being without them... yowch. :( then bad falls into a ravine, shoved by denix, and amora saves him. :) but when he fell he purposefully avoided landing in the water. :(
later on they go to the leaderboard! there amora offers that bad can adopt her for a while, since she's "kinda an orphan" based on the activity of her parents other than bagi, and he accepts :) though knowing he literally can't be active either lol. from then on, amora calls bad "dad" for the rest of the night, and "pai bad" the next day when talking with some of the experts :)
some more fun stops later, they pause in the gallery as gabe explains more of the araldo and bia beef, to which bad says once more to "wine and dine" araldo... if u want it done right, do it urself, geez... chat, beat this guy up for me... he has a weakness for guys with power... another moment in this stop to goof around, bad says "yeah, im really good at cooking... people. meals." which is normal q!bbh and the least surprising thing he's said or done all night.
the night slowly comes to a close, after running into guaxi for a small reunion, he says goodbye with a bang when denix kills him and he logs out. they then contain mr. x's corpse in a box of glass, preserved for memories <3
if this is what post-qsmp has been like for q!bbh so far, IM SO EXCITED FOR MORE!!! and yes i HAVE spent at least 5 hours writing notes as i vod review!!! q!bbh on arkanis felt a lot like a classic day on qsmp with his character plus some pain and suffering, and q!bbh on mythcraft gave us some extra lore bits to think about!!! very very fun, im sooo excited for whatever ending cc!bad has been wanting to make for q!bbh, because if it means he's still kicking it going around to other worlds, all of his pain in tow, IM SO READY!!! thank you if you went through everything here it was a doozy and mostly for yelling about with other people since i haven't been on tumblr for a while and i miss the screams from here. :)
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thecoolerliauditore · 2 days ago
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Can i propose a wild thought to you that I'm rattling off as I just thought of it
Have you considered the lizzie-scott parallels/contrasts?
One of my favourite things about Lizzie is her perpetual "i meant to do that!" attitude she approaches everything with. She thinks herself the leader of sorts and the only compitent bamboozler but my girl is just as big of a loser and klutz, she's just gotten slightly luckier so far. Its why I love her and Jimmy, they both think they're the responsible one when really they play hot potato with the braincell except neither noticed the braincell was replaced with an actual hot potato. She's better at certain things (remembering things and deduction in particular) but none of those things are surviving and its completely negated by her curiosity.
But anyways my point is that like Scott she tries to pretend she's competent and the smart one who is babysitting her teammates, keeping them under control, when she isn't any of those things and actually she cares a lot and is internally screaming all the time.
She's just capable of dropping the mask to be vulnerable. Or, yknow, aware it is in fact a mask in the first place. At the end of the day Lizzie can open up and apologize when she does something silly or says something a bit too mean. She'll just find something new to puff up her chest about.
She's also a sweat, she's just really bad at it.
(Sorry I could probably compare seablings vs fh more to emphasise my point but im trying really hard to keep to the point of this ask without going on tangents and I don't trust myself to not spend 3 hours writing about seablings and forgetting the whole point if I do (also you could also probably compare joel/lizzie to your scott/pearl stuff but 1) i think that probably works better comparing joel and scott more than lizzie and scott and 2) i think comparing their relationship with the same person even if its a different type of relationship might be more revealing and 3) i'm bias))
I ACTUALLY HAVE PONDERED SCOTT AND LIZZIE BEFORE. Not to any level that I feel is worth its own post or anything but they definitely do have a handful of common points that have sent me spiraling in the past (<- guy who really, really likes death games in general and totally didn't try to map out a full hunger games AU at one point. and put scott and lizzie in district 1 together because it just makes sense and has horrifying implications for both of them).
Anyway this is all very true, I hadn't even considered it in the context of their relationships with Jimmy but it makes a lot of sense with the whole. Awhhh I have to Keep Him Alive oop there he goes I guess he'll be die next session 🙄🙄 sort of energy they both try to embody. And how it's kind of performative for both of them, but I think I'll have to let the season play out a bit more before I form any sort of opinion on Lizzie's treatment of Jimmy. (I'm forever sad that Lizzie missed out on three seasons I feel like she might've been a smajor level blorbo to me if she was just there more)
This is a little on the meta side but from what I understand Scott pretty much started off his youtube career with Lizzie's guidance post-WoW-party so I suppose it makes enough sense that he takes after her so much on a persona level as well. Except he's a lot worse at embracing the tongue-in-cheek insincerity. That thing you said about the mask.
I do think Scott is at least acutely aware of his performative nature too, just less willing to acknowledge it for what it is. Lizzie is lying to you, Scott is lying to you but more importantly lying to himself. And that's the difference that I think makes Scott so much more. Dangerous? I suppose would be the word to use. Other than the fact that he is just overall a lot better at being a sweat in general but I'd argue even that could be seen as part of his constant need to keep up his perfect image.
Anyway I'm very unfamiliar with Lizzie and Jimmy's dynamic so I'm excited to see how it goes and even moreso with the comparison to my guy now planted i n my mind. Cheers I loveee stuff like this.
Also sidenote I do find it very entertaining that I'm as predictable as I am <-- has thought about scott/pearl and joel/lizzie as foils alot especially in LL
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lovebunnie · 20 hours ago
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“it’s not about canon fucking capital!” nandor spits in the air between them. guillermos jaw drops a bit, and it all starts to feel like a bit of a sick joke to nandor. its never easy, not with guillermo.
he shifts and narrows his eyes. “being a janitor had its good moments,” nandor admits. “i liked being the barrier between the cleanliness of productivity and the filth of failure. also those paper towels were very powerful, they didnt even leave any streakies!
“but…” nandor lets his shoulders drop and he suddenly cant look at guillermo. “being around humans all day is kind of shitty.”
guillermo huffs. “trust me, hanging around vampires all the time isnt all its cracked up to be either. ya know, i spent so many years cleaning up shit and say what you will about panera but atleast cleaning toilets there got me a free pastry-“
“why do you always leave me?”
it shocks them both into silence. guillermos jaw clicks shut while nandor hunches his shoulders, as though he could curl away from his own confession. he was literally commanding an army, but here was where words failed him.
guillermo swallows. “leave you? im right here.”
“no you are not,” nandor hisses. “you are with celeste and then you are with derrick and then it is freddie and laszlo and now you are with jordan.” he steps forward, which makes guilermo step back. conquering lands, even here and now.
“why must you always leave? why do you want to leave, and why do i want you to stay? it was not like this with other familiars, ill have you know!”
nandor thinks about all the snide comments made by laszlo and nadja over the years. their familiars were always easy come, easy go. but guillermo was always there. he would misplace an ugly sock or leave his toothbrush in the open.
guillermo has always been different. guillermo has always been the exception.
it makes all the leaving he does very painful. nandor doesnt know why.
“other familiars don’t pledge almost half their lives to one master,” guillermo counters. “other familiars wouldve left a long fucking time ago.”
it takes everything in nandor not to shudder at being referred to as master by guillermo. “i dont give a shit about other familiars. not even my own old familiars. they were just… blips in the radar.”
“and me?” guillermo whispers, finally reclaiming the ground covered by nandor and placing them almost chest to chest. “fifteen years for a vampire doesnt seem like much of anything.”
“you were my purpose, guillermo,” he says. “to make you into a fucking cool vampire. and then you decided it wasnt actually what you wanted and after that annoying ceremony that i put a lot of hard work into, you wanted to leave again. so now i have no familiar, no purpose because you are not a vampire. i have nothing.”
guillermo stays quiet for many seconds and nandor can see his eyebrows twitching in thought. it had been so long since nandor has stood this close to guillermo so if nothing else, the proximity was a nice touch
“my purpose was to be turned into a vampire, by you,” guillermo says. “and then i realized it would never happen unless i did something, so i did. but it doesnt change the fact that i spent so many years knowing that i…” he swallows and to nandors delight, his cheeks turn crimson under shitty lighting. “i was meant to be yours, turned by you.”
“you are driving me crazy,” nandor says quietly. “i do not know why you keep leaving me and why i care so much. you really hurt me, you know! every time you leave it hurts!”
“i know why i keep leaving,” guillermo says. “and i think i know why you want me to stay so bad. the reasons are pretty similar, if i had to guess.”
“tell me,” nandor growls, his hands coming up to grip guillermos biceps so that he cannot flee, not again. “tell me.”
with the same drive behind the words that would compel weaker men, guillermo looks up at him, and before nandor can even think about speaking again, guillermo surges up and crashes their lips together with his hands tangled in nandors hair and knocking the head piece off in the process.
before it can even begin, guillermo pulls away. he is panting and then pulling a vibrating telephone out of his pocket. nandor watches with blazing eyes
“its jordan…” he trails off, looking thoughtful while nandor feels murderous.
a small smile creeps onto his face as the still vibrating phone goes back into his pocket. “but I’ve got better things to do.”
guillermo smiles at nandor and for once, he looks settled, not ready to bolt. nandor knows the same expression is reflecting on his face as well.
as he makes his move towards a willing guillermo, he hopes the camera crew is more engrossed with whatever antics nadja and laszlo and colin robinson have gotten into.
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sturnsmia · 24 hours ago
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𝑭𝑶𝑹𝑬𝑽𝑬𝑹 𝑴𝑰𝑵𝑬 | 𝑴𝑨𝑻𝑻 𝑺𝑻𝑼𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑶𝑳𝑶
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𝒊𝒏 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉… when matt sees his best friend constantly suffering under her boyfriend’s mistreatment, he takes matters into his own hands.
𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: toxic and slightly abusive boyfriend, murder (in detail), knives, blood, if u don’t feel comfortable do not read!!
𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆: hi hi! i wanted to post something a little more spooky for halloween but i didn’t finish in time lol, sorry. i hope you guys like it! also send me requests for things to write or just to chat. i lovee responding to anons (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)
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it was late at night when you were at the triplets house with your friend madison. you guys had spent the night watching movies and catching up with each other after enduring a long week of work. unfortunately you had a whole lot to talk about considering your boyfriend, noah was starting to piss you off.
“i don’t even know what his problem is! one second he’s saying im the love of his life and then two minutes later he’s screaming at me for spending i didn’t do!” you explained to your friends while flailing your hands around in awkward gestures to express your frustration. “and that’s not even the worst part! he had the fucking nerve to grab my wrist when i tried to walk away from him! and it wasn’t a gentle touch it was like this.” you reached to your right and grabbed matt’s wrist before gripping it harshly, causing him to pull away. you whispered a little sorry and shot him a quick smile.
“what the hell! that’s not okay, why the fuck would he do that?” chris questioned with a mouth full of popcorn.
“ugh i have no idea its so stupid the way he’s acting.” you groaned, leaning your head back on the couch.
matt clenched his jaw at the thought of your boyfriend laying his hands on you. he never liked noah from the start, not that noah enjoyed his presence either. noah constantly complained that matt had feelings for you and that it was obvious to everyone. whenever he brought it up you defended your best friend, explaining that you and matt have known each other since the two of you were kids, and you’ve always hung around the triplets. regardless of your constant reassurances, noah never attempted to make amends with matt.
“honestly y/n, that’s so fucked for him to do, and you need to stand up for yourself and set boundaries! don’t let him push you around.” madison spoke from the other side of the couch beside nick, who nodded in agreement to her statement.
you sighed, thinking about the possibilities that could happen if you talked back to noah. he definitely would not take it lightly.
“maybe you should just break up with him.” matt spoke with nonchalance. your head snapped to look at the boy who just spoke utter nonsense. “you’re funny matthew.”
“i mean this isn’t the first time he’s done something shitty to you. it’s clearly hurting you physically and mentally, so why not just let him go?” matt shrugged turning towards you.
“because i love him, matt. just because he does a couple things i don’t like doesn’t mean we have to break up.” you spoke with slight annoyance in your tone. nick, chris, and madison exchanged awkward glances, avoiding getting involved.
matt sighed, connecting your hands together and rubbing it softly with his thumb. “i know, i didn’t mean it like that, i’m sorry. we all just want you to be happy.” chris nodded his head before shoving another piece of popcorn in his mouth.
nick stretches his arms dramatically before yawning. “okay it’s pretty late, we should get to bed. y/n i know you’re staying the night, madison do you wanna stay too?”
“i would but i have to get up early for a meeting tomorrow so i have to head home now.” madison said while collecting her purse from the ground. “i’ll miss you.” you frowned, pulling her in for a hug.
“y/n we’ll see each other again in like two days.” madison laughed as she hugged you, rubbing your back softly. “bye boys, i’ll see you guys later! love you!” she smiled, walking down the stairs and out the front door.
as you heard the front door slam shut, you and nick stood up from the couch and started walking towards the stairs before matt gently pulled your wrist back. nick continued walking up the stairs as you stopped.
you turn around, staring at his icy blue eyes. “yeah?” you asked softly. matt brushed a piece of hair out of your face and tucked it behind your ear. “make sure that little idiot boyfriend of yours doesn’t touch you like that again or i’ll have to go pay him a visit, alright?”
you giggle softly at his statement considering he always jokes about putting noah in his place. “alright mr tough guy don’t go around hurting people now.” you murmured, pushing your finger to his chest. “goodnight matt” you said gently, a warm smile spreading across your face as he shooed you away to nick’s room.
“good night angel” matt replied back as you made your way up the stairs.
˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊
the next day you woke up around 11am and ate breakfast with the triplets before returning to your own apartment. you twisted the doorknob to your front door open and quickly dumped your purse lazily on the floor before flopping down face first onto the couch. you laid there until you heard a notification chime and looked up to see your phone.
it was a text from noah telling you he was coming over because you had abandoned him last night for matt. you roll your eyes at his snide remark before tapping your fingers on your phone to reply a quick “okay”.
you got up from the couch and walked over to the bathroom to clean yourself up a bit. you brushed out the small tangles in your hair and open the drawer to take out a tube of mascara and an eyelash curler. leaning over the counter towards the mirror, you brushed the mascara wand over your lashes. you swapped out the mascara for your space camp cherry flavored lip balm and swiped it across your lips. after putting everything back in the bathroom drawers you left the bathroom and went to your room searching for a comfortable outfit. you settled on navy blue sweatpants and a lacy white tank top.
as you finished changing you heard a loud knocks coming from the front door, alerting you that your boyfriend had arrived. you quickly walked to the front door and opened it to reveal noah looking slightly irritated when he saw you.
“hi baby!” you smile warmly at him and pull him in for a hug. noah wraps one arm around your shoulder and pats your back softly. you pull away after noticing he’s not acting normal. “is everything alright?”
“yeah i’m fine.” he responds dryly. your eyebrows furrow showing your confusion, noah notices and realizes your not satisfied with his answer. “you couldn’t have maybe put yourself together and looked a little nicer for me before i got here?”
the smile from your face drops immediately, turning into an fustrated and slightly embarrassed look. noah shut the door behind him and sat down at the table in your kitchen, waiting for you to move from the front door.
“are you being serious?” you murmured, keeping your eyes on the door and avoiding eye contact. “what?” noah’s face twisted in slight annoyance at your sudden attitude. “you’re telling me that you’re in this “mood” all of a sudden that causes you not to give your girlfriend a hug or kiss when you see her? all because i don’t look pretty enough?” you say sternly, attempting to hide the hurt in your heart.
noah quickly stood up from his seated position, the wooden chair he once sat on tumbling to the floor with a loud bang. your eyes finally turned to him and see his jaw clenched and his eyes burning with fury. “now i don’t know what those sturniolo boys got into your head, but i’m sure not liking this bitchy attitude you got goin’ on.” noah sneered, shaking his head in disapproval.
you scoff at him, he always found a way to blame this on them. “this has nothing to do with them. you can’t say some bullshit to me and expect me not to say something back!” your tone starting to raise. “woah there! don’t mess with the tough girl here, all high and mighty!” noah said sarcastically, raising his arms up for dramatics.
“you’re so fucking immature!” you yell at him with tears starting to well in your eyes. the look in his eyes immediately made you regret your sudden outburst, your heart sunk to your stomach. noah slowly walked towards you. “what the hell did you just say to me?”. you swallowed hard and fidgeted with your fingers, out of instinct you turned to the front door and grabbed the handle. before you could open it, noah put his hand on your shoulder and harshly turned you around, pushing your back to the door.
“i asked you a goddamn question!” he spat, his grip remained tight on your shoulder as he kept you pinned against the door. tears started to fall from your eyes as you clenched your jaw and kept a stern look. “get off me.” you muttered. noah kept his eyes on you, his rough hands gripped even tighter on your bare shoulder. you pushed him back, causing him to release his grip. before he could say anything you turned away from him and raced out the front door.
you ran to your car and slammed the door shut. at this point the emotions you had hiden came crashing down as you drove through the neighborhoods. wiping your tears and sniffling at every red light, you drove as fast as you possibly could to the only faces you wanted to see.
after parking your car, you walked quickly to the front door slightly shivering from the breeze considering you didn’t get to grab a sweater before you left. you knocked loudly on the door impatiently waiting for someone to answer.
chris opened the door with a bright smile on his face before seeing your teary and red eyes. “hey, what’s going on?” he asked softly. you couldn’t even respond before you latched onto him for a hug as broken sobs escaped your throat. “oh no. hey shhh it’s okay don’t cry, don’t cry.” chris held you tight and stroked your hair gently before matt and nick walked down the stairs to see what had taken their brother so long to answer the door.
“y/n, sweetheart let’s go upstairs to the living room okay?” nick whispered softly. you looked up from chris’s chest to see nick and matt with worried expressions plastered on their face. nick took your hand and interlocked them before leading you up the stairs and onto the couch. he sat down next to you as you rested your head in his lap. matt and chris followed behind the two of you and took a seat beside nick.
“tell me what happened y/n, did you get hurt? do i need to kill someone?” nick asked, rubbing your shoulder. “it-it was noah” you choked out with a sniffle. “he came to see me and, he got upset with me because he said i didn’t look nice enough for him when he came over.” matt’s anger started to bubble up just hearing noah’s name. “i yelled back at him and told him he was being immature. and when i tried to leave but he grabbed my shoulder and pushed me against the door. i had to push him back before he finally let go.” you rambled, tears falling from your eyes.
matt’s jaw hardened after hearing what noah had done to you. he gave chris a hard stare before they both stood up and walked down the stairs without saying a word. “wha-where are they going?” you asked, sitting up and turning to nick. “don’t worry about it, let’s get you cozy and do something to get your mind off that brainless boyfriend of yours.” nick suggested with a smile, wrapping a fuzzy blanket around your shivering bare shoulders.
˖ . ݁𝜗𝜚. ݁₊
matt’s gripped the steering wheel of his car so hard his knuckles were almost white. he couldn’t believe that your idiotic boyfriend would ever think it’s okay to lay his hands on a women, especially you. you always found a way to forgive noah for his mistakes because of your kind heart. the thoughts coursing through his mind made the drive to noah’s house a fast ride. he already knew the directions from previous occasions when you had asked matt to drop you off there.
“you don’t need me to come in do you?” chris asked as matt jumped out of the driver seat. he grabbed a small object out of the side door and looked up at his brother. “no, i’ll be fast.” matt responded slamming the door shut and walking up to your front door. he twisted the door knob and pushed it open using his shoulder. noah looked up from his phone and stood up from his spot on the couch, looking at matt.
“dude what the fuck?” noah sneered, looking confused at the loud noise coming from the front door. until he recognized the face that was staring back at him. “matthew sturniolo, what brings you here today?” his face twisted into a cocky smile.
“do you find pride in hurting your girlfriend?” matt said through gritted teeth. noah laughed from across the room “what’d she tell you now, that i’m abusing her? god she’s so full of lies.” matt slammed the front door shut before taking slow steps towards noah.
“i won’t ever understand how she fell in love with such a lowlife like you.” matt scolded, keeping intense eye contact with the boy in front of him.
“what? you jealous i get to fuck her instead of you? get over yourself, she’s mine.” noah teased, a grin present on his face. matt scoffed and reached into his pocket, he was sick and tired of the way your boyfriend treated you like an object and constantly put you through so much pain.
“i never liked you from the start. i always knew you would be a shitty boyfriend. but y/n always finds a way to see the good in people, even the most insufferable people like you. and i won’t let you take advantage of that.” matt fumed, pulling his hand out from his denim pocket. noah’s eyes widened at the pocket knife in matt’s hand. he stepped back but was met with a wall behind him, he had nowhere to run.
“woah man let’s just talk this out i can-“ matt didn’t let him finish talking before piercing his stomach with his knife. noah let out weak groans before matt retracted his hand, releasing the blade from his lower abdomen. in a swift motion matt struck him again and again, watching the knife go through his chest. over and over and over again.
noah’s body quickly fell limp underneath him. matt crouched down, using the carpet to wipe the blood off his pocket knife before clicking it shut and placing it back into his pocket. matt stood back up looking down at the lifeless body beneath him, a smirk creeping on his face.
“she’s always been mine.”
xoxo, mia ♡
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ma1dita · 1 day ago
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zuko, give em pumpkins to talk about, chocolate bar. please im beggin actually
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runnin' with the devil
[STARRING: PRINCE ZUKO x reader “Really? Now? God, you have terrible timing.”] wc: 1.1k warnings: none. erm allusions of kidnapping and kinda stockholm syndrome, this is pre-character development baldheaded ass zuko so he’s a jerk… yandere? no he’s just a dick. this ended up fluffy
monster mash-terlist
꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷
There’s a part of you that likes it.
The catch and release— running from him gives you an adrenaline rush you can’t explain. It’s been almost three years of this— a predator chasing after his prey but still he hasn’t killed you, if that’s any consolation. People have been thrown overboard or blasted into ashes for less—loyalty is important to the Fire Nation after all, especially with the forgotten prince. 
Some values are instilled so deeply within a person’s core that it’s difficult to break free.
But you find yourself not wanting to as he chases you for an nth time, on this occasion, through the underbrush of Kyoshi Island. Flames lick at your heels as you push forward, your calves burning in exertion. You could’ve sworn he already left to chase the Gaang before you made a break for it—but if they didn’t know Zuko and the 41st were here already, well… the wildfire spreading through the village should be proof enough.
“Stop running!” the prince roars, and the two of you barrel past townsfolk who scream and run in different directions, anywhere to be away from the both of you. None of them fought back of course—neutrality was the island’s selling point, a reprieve from the Hundred Years’ War. But they were kind enough; pretty girls with painted faces and fists of steel trying to determine if you were friend or foe as you slipped off the boat to search for new shoes from a nearby market. You didn’t suit any of the military-issued gear on board, often having to get crafty or sneak away for personal necessities. The Kyoshi Warriors only intended to protect their own, releasing you from your restraints after they realized you were but a lost girl with no escape plan. 
Or was it no plans to escape?
“Then stop chasing me!” you yell back, hair whipping in different directions as you look back at his angry face and then—CRASH!
Headfirst into a cabbage cart with an old man groveling at finding his produce in the dirt, you lay there with your vision spinning until all you can see is him. Zuko stands over you with an incessant glare on his scarred face, “Get up.” His hand reaches for your tunic and you flinch, before he grabs you by the scruff like a yowling puppy, watching you kick and scream for dear life.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Jeez, hothead—you think anyone in their right mind won’t start running if flames are shooting past them?” Your arms are crossed as he sets you down, a warm hand still pressed on the nape of your neck as if he expects you to change your mind. 
“I just wanted new shoes. Spirits know running from you has worn mine through.”
It’s kind of annoying to him that even when you’re mad at him like this, he can’t find it in himself to give a damn. You look petulant, glaring at him through your lashes and he knows if you were actually useful—you’d probably shoot lasers out your eyes.
But you can’t, much like how he can’t be without you. This arrangement of convenience is something he can’t live without—even if Iroh tries to make him admit it. You were the last gift to him from his father, after all.
A gift should be treasured. This one just likes to make him work for it.
“You could’ve asked me. You’re not my only problem, you know!”
And then you’re smirking, like you know that even if that’s true—boy were you his favorite one to deal with. Every single time he leaves to ‘catch’ the Avatar, he also leaves an opening for you to set yourself free. Whether it be a door left ajar or Iroh whistling and swinging the keys off his fingers, you wonder why a skilled tactician like him always gives you an option.
Maybe it’s because he knows you don’t want to leave him. Maybe that’s his secret hope.
Wind blows overhead as Appa and the Gaang arrive to protect the island that only protects their own. Thinking about it from a broader perspective, you can see the appeal of the villagers and why they do so. Zuko cares for you too, in his own convoluted, disorganized way. 
So maybe, you should’ve warned Zuko about the Kyoshi Warriors. But it’s kind of funny to watch his ass get kicked once in a while, especially since it’s hilarious to see him so mad every time it happens. You and the crew are soaked to the bone after the battle, teeth chattering as the unagi douses the flames that dance around the livelihood of the island until there is nothing left but char and smoke. The 41st runs up the ramp, preparing to set sail for the South Sea, and your feet are sinking in the sand.
Here’s your chance—you look back to the destroyed forest and for a moment, you wonder if you should disappear into the distance that separates you from that boat. Maybe become a warrior yourself, or live in the simplicity that comes with being nothing but a memory.
“Your highness! We need to go!”
Zuko’s standing on the deck, staring at you. He’s not saying anything, nor does he need to—your feet make the steps back to him before your mind can make the decision.
It’s easier to choose a familiar hell instead of an unknown heaven.
Iroh smiles at you softly, patting you on the head as you walk past him; he hands you a warm towel to wipe your feet. You wash away the dirt and grime of the day as you watch the setting sun, staring off towards the horizon.
A pair of new embroidered shoes knock against your ankle, bouncing against the wooden floors. They’re your size, and nicer than anything you’ve ever known. Zuko stands against the railing, pretending to not see his uncle’s shit-eating grin.
He protects his own, and by extension, what he can admit—-is that includes you.
If this is the part in the story where you get your supporting character development arc to change the tides of fate, you surely hope defeating Firelord Ozai won’t be affected by kissing the cheek of his exiled son. 
“Did you steal these?” You tsk, holding them by the tips of your fingers and nudging him, his face steaming from a featherlike touch that if he thinks hard enough, he’s not sure if it happened. Zuko doesn’t know how to handle affection—so he does what you two both do best—chase and catch. And run his mouth.
“Really? You know, we wouldn’t be in this situation if you didn’t have terrible timing,” he rattles off, getting angrier as you walk away, miming him blabbering as you skip around the ship in your new shoes.
In all senses of the word, you’re already his.
꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷꒷꒦꒷꒦꒷
ma1dita's monster mash is closed for requests but ongoing for the rest of october!
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puppyeared · 5 months ago
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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luck-of-the-drawings · 1 year ago
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IMAGINE. working at ur stupid uhhh job or whatever. pulling into your drive way and ready to work on some crazy project in your garage. opening the door to the most unfamiliar silence. did your wife and kid leave for something? could you imagine knocking on your kids door, hardly getting an answer, and opening it to find the splattered remains of your wife across his room your child is scared! hes hardly consolable, in a state of shock and terror. you are too, but youre the adult here. you need to take charge. you need to protect him. you need to do something. you need to do something.
#cw gore#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi pd spoilers#ashe winters#LOOOORRRD HELP ME THIS IS A YEAR OLD AND I HAAAATE LOOKIN AT IIITTTT ALL I CAN SEE ARE MY MISTAAAKESSS RRAAGHHHGGG ITS FINE THOUGH#ITS FIIIINE ITS ALL FIIIIIIINE!! IM HARSHER ON MY ART THAN ANYONE ELSE ITS FIIIIIINE IIITTSFFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEE#ANWYAY SO I THINK ALOT ABOUT THE FACT HE KILLED HIS MOM. FUUUUCKED UP. POOR GUY.. i wish i could learn more about what that day was like#the lil scenario wrote is my own silly little headcanon. but what really happened on that day? was mark there? or did he come home to it?#how violent was it really? was ashe awake the whole time? does he remember exactly how he killed her? does he remember?#who was mrs winters? what was she like? i like to think she was the one that gave ashe the book. taught him what she could before. yknow.#did ashe or mark try to destroy it afterwards? i could imagine mark throwing it into a fire. only for it to reappear with ashe#maybe ashe couldnt destroy it but i could imagine him hiding it. hiding away from it. and yet when we find him he holds it so close#its the only thing he can do! no super powers or anything. this was it. why would he ever throw away the only thing hes good at?#AND GOOD GOD MARK... TURNING TO MERCENARY WORK OVER IT ALL... SELLING HIS SOUL TO A LAbortory that changed him in immense ways#when did it get bad enough for him to start covering his face? what was ashe thinking? he knew his dad was up to something but what?#maRK HAS SUUUCH A CRAZY KILL COUNT TOO. I THINK THE HIGHEST IN THE SERIES IF WE'RE NOT LOOKIN AT THE GODS OR WATEV#MASS MURDER. MAN HAS COMMITTED MASS MURDER AND BROKE OUT OF SUPER VILLAIN PRISON WITH A PEN. MAN BUILDS IRON MAN SUITS IN HIS BASEMENT#OKay okay enough of my ramblin okayokay i just REALLY LOVE THIS SSHHOOOOWWW DUUUDEE EEUUGHTHTHHRHGHGH I LOVE THE WINTERS FAMILY...
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petrow1tch · 16 days ago
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They weren't lying, this psychological recovery journey got hands
#3rd month of taking antidepressants and knowing that There Is something majorly fucked up within me#i feel like im becoming normal bit by bit but also now my other problems become my aparent to me#i started to notice i have this childlike simplistic attitude towards wonder and relationships but also at the same time i understand the#severity of troubles around me on the level of burned out adult#but also it takes me from a week to several years to realize what people meant#and yet sometimes i get everything clearly#there are still ways to go#i still have to find a therapist#cuz psych diagnosed me with BPD; geberal anxiety disorder and ADHD and said i have autism signs that could explain the development of BPD#but all he can do is medical treatment which is not the kind you need for BPD and autism#im not saying you can treat autism but yeah he meant i need a psychotherapist for these instead of psychiatrist#i hope i can complete this mental health journey bcuz i feel like i finally got hit with all the weight of burnout i had all these years#i did some creative work in the august/early september but rn its all touching grass in real world and playing games#like i cook i help my family with chores i play fortnite i clean up my room i go out at 1am to look at the stars#all of my own volition without feeling like i need to push myself to do this#I'm scared that making art is not one of those things#i often have a thought that maybe art isnt really for me and in a perfect world i wouldnt do it#but then why am i so good at it#like...#petrotalk
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monachopism · 6 months ago
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being jewish with zero affiliation to israel and rather a generational line of activists for palestine is a hard line to walk and sometimes i wish i could just fall off
#i hate zionist jews i hate i stand with israel signs in my neighborhood i hate leftists who write and speak and act like theyve never met an#actual jewish person in their life and believe that were all genocidal monsters (in spite of our own genocide which i assume will eventuall#flip around to leftist holocaust denial) i hate that people are blaming israeli civilians for the faults of their deeply corrupt government#i hate that i cant say zionism is inherently antsemitic without getting fucking maimed i fucking hate it here the world is on fire just#fucking let me burn#anyways#sorry#free palestine#any other#jumblr#girlies (gn) relating to my vent#bc im started to feel ashamed of myself my culture and my people#and its such a fucking shitty feeling#like i can barely look in palestine / gaza / etc. tag without seeing blindingly blatant antisemitism coming from left right and center#like just say you hate jews and fuck off#i cant look at this shit anymore fuck#idk why im so worked up about this rn i just. btwn weeding out all the zionist blogs i didnt know i followed and just being so fucking-#and weeding out all the antisemitic leftist blogs i didnt know i was supporting its all just crashing down#im so fucking tired#and im so fucking tired of having to defend myself any time i talk about the jewish experience in any of this#and im so fucking tired of people equating judaism with religion only#and im so fucking tired of the double standard of also equating with only one race#like there arent jews of every race#the reason you cant see any of this shit is because nearly a century later were still dealing with the aftermath of the 6mil person murder#were always at the cross roads of some ridiculous double standard or the scapegoat for when things are going badly#like fuck i just#dont want to have this fucking identity anymore it makes me a walking talking breathing living fucking target#idk what to do I'm just#desolate
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flufallo · 6 months ago
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DID NEIL GAYMEN WRITE DBD
He wrote the comics yes
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poisonedfate · 6 months ago
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not to get deep on this lovely tuesday evening, but i wonder when exactly did everything go wrong
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uygfiug · 4 days ago
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ive misjudged the passage of time to a disastrous degree again :(
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piplupod · 9 months ago
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mother: "theres this great job where you'd be on-call to come in!"
me: "ahhh i don't really want to be on-call, that would stress me out a lot because I'd always be on edge,,"
mother: "no you wouldn't, you could make it your thing!"
me: "...my thing?"
mother: "being on call! it'd be great! :)"
me: "i would probably be crying like... a lot ahaha. because I would always be on edge never knowing when to expect having to go into work, yknow?"
mother: "nooo, you could just make it a thing!"
me: "sorry, what do you mean by thing?"
AND I NEVER FOUND OUT !!
#i feel very ill fdsjkl tonight was ... not good#not the worst definitely not the worst#just. a lot of diet talk and making fun of other ppl that she expected us to all laugh at (and we did. idk if they found it funny.)#and brother labelling some influencer having rape charges against him just ''internet drama''#number one: i dont want to hear about that. number two: that is not just ''drama'' that is like. serious. what the fuck is wrong w youuuu#my mother will say that all the food i eat is very bad for me and do that while knowing full well i struggle to eat Anything#and say that simply Adding things to the diet is pointless bc ur poisoning urself still! u have to Take Out things! i cant fucking do that!#im still baffled that two years ago when i tried to go to them for help when i was almost fainting from not eating they just shrugged at me#''okay? why are u telling us this?'' BECAUSE YOU ARE MY PARENTS. AND I AM TRYING TO GET HELP.#i should've known better than to try tbh but like. its so hard to completely let go of every sliver of hope that they'll... be kind#like me saying i was feeling suicidal a few yrs ago just garnered a ''oh don't start this again. we're not doing this again.''#and me admitting my own damn self to the psych ward just had her telling me ''i dont think you actually needed to go :/''#mother dearest if it werent for the other fuckers in the brain (caused by you abusing me) then i would've been dead several times over#i am so fucking tired i am so sick of these ppl it is so incredibly painful and terrifying that this is supposed to be my family#this is the one support system i get in life. and it is no support system at all. i am fucked !! i am so unbelievably fucked!!!#i know other ppl make it thru but they are much stronger than me. i am lacking something that they all have lmao. i am cowardly and weak!!!#i have been trying so fucking hard to figure out how to like. make this work. how to survive in this society and its just. impossible#i think we're back to the clock ticking down as my bank account runs out#i cannot be employed and ppl keep telling me disability won't accept me so i am just. unanimously fucked over i suppose#i have two years !! two years until i run out of money!!! thats a lot of time!! to make all the art i want to make!!#i will make this work for these two years i will cope and make my art and disconnect and daydream through the intolerable parts#i will make these two years so good sdfjkl im gonna make it to the end of them#sorry this is all coming flooding out fsjdkl i've just tried so hard to be like. positive abt things and laugh abt things and be okay#im tired of trying to make it okay fdsjkl i am wallowing tonight i guess. boohoo poor little me fdsjkl i'll probably get over it soon#just need to like. let a little of the pressure leak out so i don't completely crack and do smth stupid#it will be okay !!! or as okay as it can be !!! this will be blocked out by tomorrow morning probably!!#or it'll have to be LMAO i have my silly old lady yarn group tomorrow and i need to be Normal for that#suicide tw#abuse tw#ed tw
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iwakuraz · 2 months ago
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it'll all be okay because there's only one more day left in the school week and after that it'll be the weekend. wait no what do you mean after the weekend I'll just have to go back to school? what do you mean the cycle of going to school and coming back home completely worn out is gonna continue?
#mole talks#ive been back in school for..... one week.#im so tired i can't stop feeling tired all of the time now this is horrible#i have to walk around school so much and im forved to be around other people anf its just exhausting#for me school would be better if they removed all social aspects#and all you would have to do is work and you wouldn't have to see other people ever#(apart from the teacher who is teaching you about the subject)#because if theres no forced socialisation that also means....... my classmates would never be ableist towards me again#:[ i can't believe i have to continue going to school#and ill probably have to continue going for many years to come#i hate how much it wares me out. i was si productive during the summer but now im not at all#and i JUST started school. it only gets worse from here#i just wanna learn. i dont want some annoying kid to call me slurs#i dont want to wear a uniform that makes me feel uncomfortable in my own skin#i dont wanna walk around the corridors feeling like everybody is staring at me and judging me#i dont want to go home feeling too weak and tired to do anything#i just want to learn stuff#i don't think i even really care about how going to school is good for my future because i don't know whats in the future for me#i just want to learn things in the present#:[#wow i have a lot of homework i need to do. i say i don't mind the work but i haven't finished all of this yet so maybe im just lying#im gonna cry. i dont want to go back to school tomorrow i dont want to be surronded by people who hate what i am#but also i dont want the teachers to infantalise me anymore! im not a kid. im 16. treat me like everybody else im not a kid#why am i crying into the tumblr void again
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autisticlee · 9 months ago
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how to make business plans: spend 2 weeks looking for a website to make a visual plan guide that you can collaborate with business partners, but you end up nowhere because all of them require paid subscriptions to do more than a few basic things. except you don't want to pay for these because you don't have a business yet and therefore no money!!!! but you need more than basic features (basically you can only put 50-100 items on your board with free account and i will definitely need more)
#WHY DOES EVERYTHING ON THE INTERNET HAVE TO BE SUBSCRIPTION NOW#i miss the days where you could use a website and all the features for FREE.#or at best only have one-time fee or subs for advanced stuff only profitable big businesses need and can also afford#the average person is starting to get locked out of the internet. we already pay for the internet itself. everything is too expensive#i need to make my own business so i can afford to live but everything to mae a business costs too much!!!!!!!#im too autistic for this shit. “this shit” being “a profitable member of society”#i cant get a big cool job to make a ton of money and then afford to easily become a millionaire#i bet most millionaires and all billionairs didnt work a day in their life to afford to start their businesses#and if they say they did they lie#lee rambles#i found a free unlimited one but you have to download the program and save everything locally#so it doesn't look like you cam collab with other people which defeats the purpose of what im trying to do 😭#i wanted to use milanote or whatever its called because i liked how you can link separate pages to keep things clear/uncluttered#but i dont want to pay $12 a month i think it was? to put more than 100 items on the boards. that goes so fast#but i might have to use it and just cram things together in a messy fashion to not hit that limit......#you can double the amount by referring people to make an account but still. i hate bekng limited#and being forced to pay to not have limits!!!! let me be free and only pay for advanced stuff i can live without for fuck sake#i dont know what im doing. but im making an attempt to business or something
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