#but then he doesn't understands jokes

[leviraaaaaa]

Armin: *smart enough to immediately understand the female titan is intelligent in 0.2 second*

Also Armin:

[aethersea]

I do think Blazing Saddles handled its one depiction of native americans very poorly, and the full extent of its representation of chinese workers on the railroad is they were literally just there. not even one single speaking line. unclear if this is worse or better than the redface.

it's fucking phenomenal at lampooning antiblack racism though. extremely blatant, extremely funny satire, which is constantly and loudly saying "racism is the philosophy of the terminally stupid at best and morally depraved at worst, and we should all be pointing and laughing at them 24/7"

plus the main character is a heroic black man who has to navigate a whole lot of bullshit but is constantly smirking at the extraordinarily stupid racists and inviting the audience into the joke. the one heroic white character is a guy who was suicidally depressed until he met the protagonist and they just instantly became buds, and he's firmly in a supporting role the whole time and happy to be there. the protagonist saves the day with the help of his black friends from the railroad, and uses the position of power he was given to uplift not only those friends, but all the railroad workers of other minorities too, in an explicit show of solidarity.

anyone saying "Blazing Saddles is racist" had better be talking about its treatment of non-black minorities. it had better not be such superficial takes as "oh but they say the n-word all the time" or "they have nazis and the kkk in there!" because goddamn if that's the full extent of your critique I very seriously suggest you read up on media analysis. there is too much going over your head, you need to learn to recognize satire.

[makiswirl]

can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest

like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!

[somegrumpynerd]

How many bathrooms do you think Nightmare's castle has? I can't see them each having their own cause that would be way too many but do you think they all share one?

Asking because I have a hc that Killer takes showers that last like, at least 45 minutes. Not that they need the bathrooms for anything other than bathing really, but I feel like Cross is the one most annoyed by it because he's probably the only one with a consistent hygiene routine. When Killer finally gets out Cross asks him, exasperated, "what were you doing, washing one bone at a time??" and Killer just says "sorry I had to wash my hair" and strolls past.

In reality Killer washes up pretty fast, but he likes standing under the showerhead and letting the hot water run over him. It washes the determination off him even as it drips out and he likes the feeling of being surrounded by warmth, it's like a full body hug and it makes him feel truly at peace for just a little bit. Until somebody starts banging on the door telling him to get out.

[skylersprompts]

DC x DP Prompt *10*

It had been a relative uneventful day in Gotham, the new Week just started and most of the big rouges were still in Arkham after the last big breakout. And even tho the nightly patrol wasn't done, Batman send most of his charges that were still somewhat injured home. He, Orphan and Robin would be able to handle the rest.

They had stopped some muggings and one break-in by the time patrol officially ended. His children made their way back to the manor on their bikes, while the Bat made one last round through the docks.

He had a feeling of foreboding, not necessarily a bad feeling, but he was cautious. Even if Cassandra and Damian weren't hurt that badly, he still wanted them home. He wasn't entirely sure why, but he didn't had much time to think it over.

A swirling green Portal opened in front of him and a figure started to emerge from it. Bruce got into a fighting stance, his eyes trained on the unknown.

The Portal vanished after a young man, almost still a boy, stepped out of it. He had white hair that seemed to sway as if he was under water. Green freckles glowed in the dark, just a little muted in contrast to the vibrant green eyes. The boy - because the longer Bruce looked, the younger the being seemed - floated a few inches in the air. In his hands he held what looked like a type of thermos.

"You are Batman, right?", his voice seemed to echo a bit, even in this open space. Bruce just gave a little nod, still in his fighting stance. Just because the other seemed young, didn't mean he wasn't dangerous.

"Good, good... ahem... So my name is Danny or Phantom or Danny Phantom and I know this might come a bit suddenly, but a friend of mine - well more like my mentor - said that I was on the way for the best possible timeline and I think he really needs someone like you - you know with all those contingency plans - and a different dimension than ours and he is already 3 years in the thermos, well minus the bit he was out for a moment where Clockwork sat his Bodytime a bit back, so that he can have a childhood again, but that was like five minutes max. so that doesn't really count, because ha was also in timeout, so for him it was more like a few seconds, but ahem, what I wanted to ask you Mr. Batman, sir... Would you take my evil self from a different timeline, so that he can have a better childhood and maybe be not evil anymore?", Danny rambled and Batman really wished in this moment to have any of his children here, just to make sure that he did indeed hear correctly.

Even if everything had came out in one breath, the things he could piece together didn't paint the best picture. But it seemed like his brooding had taken to long, because the child folded into himself and started do fidget.

"I understand that you don't want to, you don't know me or Dan or anything about us, but you seemed to be the one most capable of handling him and I looked through so many dimension in the hope to find a good place for him... I can understand why he is like he is, but I will never be able to talk sense into him. His actions are unforgivable, but his timeline doesn't exist anymore, the things he done never happened and he is alone in a dimension that would just remind him of everything that happened if he would life with us... But I can totally just look into some more dimension if you don't want to! It's not your problem and I shouldn't have bothered, sorry!" Phantom started to raise his hand and a green line became visible where his finger cut through the air. If Bruce didn't do anything the being would go with a child that needed his help.

"I want a list with all his abilitis, his weaknesses, his potential triggers, dietary needs, allergies, a way to contact you, your mentor and a third trusted person in case of an emergency and a weekly check in system from your side", Bruce knew his kids would make fun of him when he brought another child home, but someone said he was the best possible guardian for this boy, so he would take him. And if he felt pleased about Danny's surprised and relieved face, than no one needed to know.

"Of course! I think Clockwork gave me a folder with everything!", the boy exclaimed, before he led the riff he started to open close, just to open another one. He seemed to rummage in the small Portal, until he showed him a folder full of papers. This would take a while to go through, but at least the boy was prepared.

[lexumpysfunland]

Guys: 🎶wooo-oooh~🎶 🎶The narrator is in love~🎶 🎶ooooooooo~🎶

He doesn't like being made fun of 👀

[aingeal98]

I love that since Duke became a Wayne sibling there's now a neat divide between the younger trio (Tim, Duke, Damian) and the older trio (Dick, Cass, Jason)

And listen. It does not matter one bit that the gap between Tim and Jason is five years smaller than the gap between Jason and Dick. The important thing is that Tim is in the younger half, which means he gets to joke that Jason's pushing 30 and ask him if his knees have popped lately grandpa.

Jason: I'm twenty three?

Damian: Wow. What was it like living through the two world wars?

Tim: Twenty three and still letting your dad ruin your life, that's wild

Jason: Tim, you're twenty one?

Tim:

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

Serendipity should be required viewing material before anyone tries to analyze Homestuck; not only is John Cusack a universal constant, but the themes and vibes of Serendipity are so fundamentally woven into Homestuck's DNA that several of Serendipity's thesises and conversations could be lifted directly from one to the other.

In particular, the way Serendipity utilizes coincidence and circumstantially simultaneous events in order to suggest - nay, decree - that the two leads belong together, is highly reminiscent of the way Hussie uses foreshadowing, and not just for romantic couples. It's also a major window into the ultimate stance Homestuck takes with regard to romance, fate, and destiny, and also more specifically, a really good look at Karkat's own personal philosophies of romance. There's a running theme in his movies of meeting someone that perfectly matches your freak, someone you don't ever need to compromise yourself around, who brings out the best in you.

Also, some of yall need to watch a shitty romcom every once in a while and develop some emotions

[kideaternomnom]

The guy who got scared of Azula in the Beach episode after she kissed him was such a pussy tbh

like if I met a girl who said we'd be the most powerful couple and dominate the world I would've loved her immediately 🙄

[mrehkka]

(I screwed up the text placement on the last page, read from professor membrane top left, down to zim bottom left, then dib top right)

Poor Dib lol

Btw i headcanon that zim has an internship at membrane labs when they're in high school. Zim talks to Membrane about Dib and them hanging out (he thinks the boys are dating and just not telling him yet) and the professor is hoping zim's "real science" attitude rubs off on Dib lmao

[alumirp]

luffy gets a girlfriend

He is blissfully unaware of this fact, however. He meets Torao at work, he's a firefighter and she's a doctor. She stitched up a cut on his arm and he gets hungry, spontaneously invites her to eat and she accepts, probably hungry too (or totally thinking that the cute guy with the stupid smile is asking her out).

They go out several times after that, usually with Luffy showing up at the hospital randomly, either injured or bringing in a patient, or simply to bother Torao because he was bored.

Luffy gets a new (girl) friend.

They're weird friends, though, because one day Torao just leaned in and kissed him. On the lips! And he liked it for some reason, so they kissed countless more times.

And sometimes things get too hot when they kiss and one thing leads to another and- well, they had sex. Several times. Which is weird, because Luffy definitely has no desire to kiss, much less have sex, with his other friends. But it works, so he just classifies them as weird friends.

He's pretty sure they're NOT lovers, because neither he nor Torao made fancy proposals, with roses, candles, fancy dinner and fancy rings, like Sanji and most TV shows tell, so, definitely weird friends.

And its okay, he likes being weird friends with Torao :D

(They're totally dating and no one believes Luffy when he says they're just friends. Because he shares his meat with Law, he actually, like, listens to her opinion instead of just doing what he wants, he takes her side in arguments no matter how obviously wrong she is, he fights with Ace, physically, when his brother says Law should get out of Luffy's life.They are totally dating, Luffy has a girlfriend, it doesn't matter that he doesn't know it.)

((law is just happy to be here, even if her boyfriend is a little slow))

[dangerousdan-dan]

Wolverine and a few of the many times he gets called short throughout Uncanny X-Men

And one of my favorites:

I just love how everyone (friend and foe) keeps calling him short and he just doesn't care. In fact, he owns it.

We love you, short king <3

[bumblingbabooshka]

I fail to see what's so FUNNY about these wicked, wicked, words.[Patreon | Commissions]

[hellenhighwater]

My dad is a man who takes his hobbies seriously enough to commit 178% to them but also has Dad Humor, so when he finally got to build his pole barn for car projects he named it Barntopia, and built himself this sign:

When the second barn was built, he named it, of course, "Barntwopia." (There was a debate on the merits of Nirbarna, but puns won out.)

And now he's just sent me a picture of a sticker he cut for his car trailer.

It says "Barntowpia."

[flowerflamestars]

Haunted holy and divine snippet

“I’ll bring you something,” Azriel murmured. Allow me, let me, my black stained hands were made for such work. He back away first, before standing, wings melting into shadow to allow her space. “You’re safe here. I promise.” An arched brow, her expression a wound long-festered. “What kind of safe, this time? Should I expect to be drowned, or beaten next?” Azriel had been made to kneel to lesser men his whole long life. There was no resemblance to the gesture when he slid to the ground at Nesta Archeron’s feet, Truthteller unsheathed. Pure and right darkness- it hurt, unexpectedly, her surprise. His blade did not bite, mournful. Azriel slowly, gently, wrangled her shocked still hands, until Nesta understood to wreath his grip in her own. Only then did star steel drink deep. “What are you”- She swallowed the sentence when Azriel raised his head. “I made my vows to Rhain. Rhysand inherited them. Yanked like they were leading strings my whole life. No vow is true without blood.” Black climbed through the silver of her eyes, pupils expanding. She could smell him bleeding. Not a monster, not a human, and not a faery either. “You will be safe,” Azriel whispered, drip of blood an echo, “I will keep you safe.” Nesta swallowed. “Why?” It was a question he deserved, though it made the sting no less. She let him meet her gaze. Stare. Morning skies and endless fire, corpse-pale dead and dreaming blue. Azriel told the truth. He would do nothing less, before her. “Because I cannot stand to do anything else.” “Fine,” Nesta exhaled, temper only in form, “Fine.” She pulled on his hands, as though to raise him. Nesta, who’d been a lady once- did those mortal lords render themselves supplicant for her favor? Had she ever accepted even one? “Rise.” She did not let go. Azriel could not stand without being near, so close the shadows hung still, silenced by Nesta’s gaze flickering over him. Her cold, brittle hands, hooked tight on his soul. A vow he had chosen. A vow he would keep. 

[purpurussy]

I feel like the "dan is bi" anon is trolling but just in case they're genuinely confused: yes dan said in BIG that he loved and felt attracted to his high school gf (although he also made it pretty clear that they did not have sex so idk where anon is getting the idea that he has slept with "multiple women" 💀), and he alluded to his attraction not being confined to a specific gender in the part where he talked about labels, but you're completely taking all of that wildly out of context and missing the point of the whole video by calling him bi. I feel like this is probably the part that's frying their brain:

(shoutout to the legend @goldenpinof for this transcript!)

But firstly, imo it was very clear from BIG, as well as other stuff he's said over the years, that he just doesn't like labels. Which I find very valid, it took me a long time to figure out how to label myself. I still don't know what my gender is lmao but I started saying "bi" for my sexuality because it's a widely-used term that gets the point across. And I think that's the thing here: he came to the conclusion that the labels "gay" and "queer" are the best descriptors of his identity, which do the most accurate job of approximating something extremely psychologically complex and multilayered and nuanced in a simple everyday term that gets the point across to other people.

Obviously words mean things and it doesn't make sense to just pick a label at random (like for example it wouldn't make sense for me to identify as a lesbian, since I definitely feel attraction to men as well as women and everything outside the binary, and am interested in acting on that attraction at times, so I wouldn't be conveying accurate information to other people if I used the label lesbian for myself) but a label is just supposed to serve the task of conveying relevant information to other people (if a lesbian feels some kind of abstract attraction to dan and phil, that doesn't mean that the alphabet council needs to immediately revoke their lesbian card!! Since the word "lesbian" still does a perfectly good job of conveying relevant information to other people. Likewise if a straight dude has a fun little gay dalliance with his college roommate, but has absolutely 0 interest in men beyond that incident, it wouldn't be remotely necessary for him to start calling himself bi if he didn't want to, because what would be the point in that if he's only interested in women? Like if he told a gay dude who found him attractive that he's bi, only to backtrack... Do you see what I'm saying here?). It's perfectly valid for Dan to use "gay" and "queer" as umbrella terms that in his opinion do the best job of describing him, out of the language that's available. If he's like essentially a kinsey >5 and decided to just round it off to a 6 at this point, who are you to tell him he can't lmao

(shoutout to the legend @goldenpinof for this transcript!

Human sexuality is often way too complicated to boil it down to a single label in a way that doesn't erase any of its nuance, and I feel like this is something he's struggled with in the past, especially with him being a public figure. He's mentioned multiple times that feeling like he had to choose a label was a factor that prolonged his decision to come out.

And this is not even getting into the impact that his trauma from his childhood and also from spending a chunk of his formative years in the public eye probably had on the way he identifies or the way he chooses to label himself. It clearly took so much courage and strength for him to finally be able to call himself gay/queer please have some respect for our brave troops

Ultimately the point is that he uses the labels "gay" and "queer", not "bi", and it really shouldn't be difficult to respect that. It's also not biphobic for him to choose not use the label "bi" (again speaking as someone who uses that label). It's just that he feels "gay"/"queer" are better descriptors for him and nobody gets to determine that except him!! :) He wants people to know he's gay so he calls himself gay and that's that on that.

There are definitely people on here who are way smarter and more well-educated than me who would've done a much better job eloquently discussing this topic without rambling all over the place but that's my take (if anyone would like to add to this please do so, I'm always open to learn more about topics like this. And I'm also not saying that the way I see it is the only objectively correct opinion, but anon is definitely wrong so 💀). Thank you for coming to my ted talk