#but then at the same time it's like. damn. i would have loved it. i'm kinda mad i didn't get to have it as a kid

[muniemimi]

I HAD A VISION OK. ehem excuse my ugly grammar, to anyone who comes across this post, hope you like it:33 (also love the art)

       Huff! And there we go, last sack of orchid seeds to organize. "That was a pretty heavy An, I'm glad you called me over before Ken-san would see you lifting and scold me for letting his precious daughter get tired." The sun continues to direct its blaze at our little flower shop managed by my coworker, and singing partners, dad. Along with the light, the winds blow a warm breeze past us, balancing the temperature. The air smelt of wet soil and the mix of fragrance from different flowers we had just finished arranging just now spread. An hour from now, we're able to go back to the 'Weekend Cottage' where me and An usually practice with the supervision and guidance of Ken-san to take a short break before we go back to watch the shop and tend to our costumers.

      "Akito.. don't inhale the pancakes at our break later.. leave some for Kohane-chan! She promised me shes coming back today! I'm planning to give her some too while I teach her bout' our shop."

     "Aah enough with this lovestruck manners! Alright, alright fine, I won't."

    I was already planning to hide the snacks for myself since earlier.. How'd she know I'd do it again? As expected of my close friend. For now I'll just slouch behind the counter and wait for time to pass by more quickly. Hurriedly, I focused my eyes on the lovely combination of petals infront of me. Chrysanthemums. The symbol of longevity and love. The way those countless petals curl to the middle of flower, focused on the most noticeable feature, the core. It was the way I have learned this flower had different colors too. My favorite. And it also happens that, that same plant represented my birth month. From the moment I had learned to walk, I had run across fields of flowers to which it seemed to be endless, and only one seemed to stop my being. It was as if it had poison, an antidote that could make me behave and listen. Since then I have kept chrysanthemums where I can see them, to watch them grow. Slowly, the clock slowly swings its arm around. While I intently adore the plants I have bloomed, an unfamiliar sound snatched my attention.

SNAP!

      A stem. My stem of sunflowers. I can faintly hear new steps from my side of the counter. An was in the greenhouse, sprinkling the shrubs I assume. I don't need to worry about that right now, I have to focus on who is suspiciously, threading lightly on a completely normal flower shop, if not a shopper. It can't be strays.. I've carefully fended them off and guided them away from the store so the plants wouldn't be disturbed. Or maybe I missed a few pups running around? Damn.. I should've just asked for help from An to drive away the dogs. I still can't seem to get used to getting close to them.. Our windows are tinted with translucent glass so it's pretty hard to see what was it that was rustling outside, so I need to check it out myself.

     I warily walk towards the wood door. It opens with no sound emitted, and I continue to inspect my surroundings, to find any movement, none. When I tilt my head to peek at the side I heard the snap, there was no one, nor no animal. What was visible was a sunflower that seemed to be trampled on the stem, but the flower itself didn't seem to be crushed. I hum to myself proudly to know that it really was a sunflower, glad to know I still know my own buds. Before I took another step to make sure no one was there, I call out a greeting, waiting for somebody to respond,

"..Hello?"

     And then I squat down to pick up the mangled handle of the wide flower. I got up from my knees, hearing the faint tapping of shoes behind me. I had thought it was An running towards here to call me back to watch the counter. It felt so similar to the sandals the star-clipped girl always wore when working.

    "Oh hey An, back from watering the plants so fast? Did you come here to ask me to come to the front desk? Don't worry about it, I just checked if there was someone here, it was probably just a stray dog I missed when I was shooing them away. Hah.. they stepped on my sunflower.. Anyway, do you mind if you take thi--"

CLICK!

!!!

    A..ah.. something clicks.

    I turn around in hopes the sunflower in my hand would be met with the bright, familiar face of my coworker only for it to be met with a.. gun..? Gun? Here? In this quiet, unknown town? Slowly trembling out of nervousness, I thought, I won't be able to defend myself if I attacked suddenly. They have a gun for heavens sake! 

    I can't quite see who was holding the weapon, only the hair of the individual being the first thing I notice. It was the combination of two seperate colors. It was a pale, muted baby blue on the left and a more dark, navy blue on the right. Was it a natural hair color they were born with? I can't help but stare at the odd mix of pigments. It strongly reminded me of orchids gathered with hyacinths and delphiniums in a bouquet, and was getting distracted by the fact a deadly weapon was still being pointed at my temple! I try my best to whisper a sentence without seemingly wanting to provoke the figure infront of me. Still poorly gripping the flower I had in my palm since earlier, visibly shaking and terrified.

   "..Your wound." 

   ".. ..?

   ..What..?"

(english seriously aint my first language, anyways I love akitoya)

mama im in love with a criminallll

[digi-diareis]

Teen MC snapping at Caleb

Context: Yk how when you're teenagers, guys think the only way to flirt with the person they like is by teasing them? Well, imagine if Caleb had an era like this until it went too far and mc finally snapped at him.

Beware: this is gonna be SO BAD. im not a writer at all and english isn't my first language either. its just that i've had this scenario in my head for a few days now and i needed it out of my system. Also, I decided to use they/them pronouns for mc. So its more inclusive that way and also bcs even I personally don't always refer to my mc as she/her. So yeah, for the bitches, bros and non binary hoes.

Imagine this, Caleb and you bantering like usual on your way home but you're having an off day which makes it easier for you to get pissed off and fed up with all the teasing. Unfortunately, Caleb doesn't notice this and keeps teasing you until you just snap.

So mc, exasperated, scoffs at him and turns around to leave with their arms folded across their chest and eyebrows scrunched so hard they almost look like a unibrow.

"I'm done talking you. Go find someone else to pick on, Caleb. I'm not in the mood."

Sensing the sudden shift of mood, Caleb is speechless for a bit and left floundering, looking for the right words to say. He thought this was just your usual banter so why were you suddenly taking the jokes seriously? Hell, he can't let you stay in a bad mood for the entire day because that means he's getting the silent treatment and he'd rather die (well not really but he almost feels like it) than have you completely ignore his entire existence. Again.

He approaches you slowly, using a gentle voice to not alarm you the same way one would with a hissing kitten.

"Pipsqueak? Did I say something wrong? I'm sorry... Tell me what it was and I promise I won't say it again. Don't be mad anymore, we don't want you to develop any more wrinkles, do we?"

And oh, the way you stiffened up, very much reminiscent of a stray cat on full alarm against anybody trying to steal its food. Caleb gulps, knowing somewhere along the lines, he triggered a tripwire and a bomb's about to blow.

"Uhm! You know what, nevermind me! How about we go buy your favorite snack? Oh, what a coincidence your favorite stall is right around the corner-"

You turn around with a glare that makes him immediately shut up, looking like you're about to rip him a new one.

"WRINKLES?! First, you make fun of my height. Calling me pipsqueak around everyone and never shutting your damn mouth about how not a day has passed where I was taller than you. Then you start being weirdly aggressive towards my other guy friends, which by the way, what the fuck? Now most of them won't even talk to me anymore! What is your problem?! And now, you're calling me OLD and UGLY?!"

"I-I never said -"

"Shut your damn mouth and listen to me, Caleb! You have been getting on my nerves lately! I've been trying to convince myself that this is all just friendly banter but sometimes, you go too far that I don't even know if I can still laugh it off! We used to be best friends but now, its so easy for you to make fun of me. I don't know what I ever did to deserve this but oh my god, if you hate me this much then just stop hanging around me!"

Mc is heaving by the end of their entire speech, extremely worked up and upset that they're red in the face. They had been bottling this up for the past few weeks so letting it out almost felt cathartic.

Caleb is stuck in place, throat dry and mouth open but words won't come out. Was that how it's been like for you? Had he taken the jokes too far recently? Maybe it was wrong to listen to the other guys in his class who said that teens tend to fall for guys who act terrible, the bad boy stereotype is popular nowadays.

He looks down, feeling guilty and pathetic that he ended up making you feel like you hated him when you were the person who embodied everything he loved. You made him feel like flying and falling, all at the same time. So how could he hurt you like this? He had to make things right before it was too late.

"I'm sorry. Its all my fault. I shouldn't have said all those hurtful things to you, even if it was a joke or not. At the end of the day, they hurt you and that's not right. Please believe me when I say that I could never hate being around you. That couldn't be more wrong, not when all I ever want to do is be by your side. So please don't tell me to stop hanging around you, just thinking about it feels like my chest is being squeezed that it hurts. I promise I won't make the same mistakes again, so please forgive me?"

He's nervous, fiddling with his hands while he looks you in the eye. He reminds you of a wet puppy under the rain, begging you to bring him home with you. You knew the moment he pulled those puppy dog eyes that you would eventually lose, you could never say no to him. Not when you were kids and not now.

You sigh, shoulders slumping and the frown gone from your face. Now you just look tired, which only makes him more worried, maybe you're tired of him? No, that can't be. What would happen to him if you decide he's not worth keeping around anymore? He just might stop functioning all together.

You turn your back and start walking home, he feels his heart drop thinking this is it. You're leaving him behind– that is until you turn your head to the side, side eyeing him with a blush on your face.

"What're you standing there for, I thought you were going to buy me my favorite snack? Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not forgiving you just yet. Not until I've had my fill."

After that day, Caleb completely changes. Or maybe its more accurate to say he reverted back to how he used to be when you guys were kids. Doting, attentive and extremely supportive. He still banters with you from time to time but he never goes out of his way to start one. Although, there is one thing that doesn't change and that's how over protective he still is, he's still acting like a guard dog and being threatening towards all the guys in your class but at this point, you're just happy to have your best friend back again.

And just like that, Caleb's popularity spikes in your class because suddenly, every girl wants a guy who comes at their beck and call and attends to their needs. No more bad boy persona for them, they just want someone who worships the ground they walk on the same way Caleb does for you.

[bronx-bomber87]

Well hello there lovely Fandom :) This has to be one of the best of eps of season so far. Tied with last week for sure. The writers came to play this season holy hell. Also a little birdie (my friend ha) told me the person who wrote 2x11 wrote this one. SOOO of course it's incredible. Start to finish. Once again not just the Chenford stuff either. (That was insanely good obviously. Losing my mind over it.)

I just love that they've tapped back into the show as a whole again. I mean we would have some decent B and C storylines along with our ship last couple years. But this season? Phew they are killing the game. Each week tops the last or ties it. I can see why Eric loves this season so much. Why he's called it his fav so far. It's been fantastic. I'm with him. Let us dive into the goldmine that is this episode.

7x08 Wildfire

We start off with another Genny appearance. I love this sfm. Wasn't sure when we'd get to see her again. Definitely was not expecting a couple episodes after 7x06. This season continues to surprise and delight me in the best way. Her reply about the GPS cracks me up. I've been in traffic so bad the GPS gave up on me too LOL Yay Uncle Tim to the rescue. This was such a nice start to the ep for Tim.

This is the season that continues to give and give. More of Tim's house AND an Uncle Tim scene? *swoon* I love that the first thing they ask about is where the good boy is. We all love him and need more of him in all of our lives. Kojo is at daycare hehe Considering how this episode goes down I'm grateful for it.

They try to pull one over on him but it ain't working. Not even a little bit. Lmao I adore how he pops back in to catch them instantly disobeying. The best part is they say 'Yes sir.' when they're caught. The love and respect is evident. It's so lovely. Seeing him in Uncle Tim mode is so cute I can't stand it. Little gem I didn't knew I needed. Well done writers.

I love Lucy bee-lining for Tim to let him know about the looting in his neighborhood. The best part is her immediately jumping in his car to get to his nephews. My heart. Such a short but impactful scene. Does my shipper heart good to see it. Chips down they're always there for each other. That's never changed despite all the messy relationship issues. A constant for them we all love to see.

So many things to love about this next portion. I wasn't able to get it all in. But the way they enter the house together on guard. As you all know I love watching them in the field. It is ship crack for me. I'll never be over the well oiled machine that is them. It is the ONE thing that never suffered no matter how bad it got between them.

It's their center and it held well. I friggin love the pic. Oh my word. It's from the baseball game in 5x11. The little things are the best. I love the small details. Tim is so damn sassy 'Gently.' Can't say I didn't think the same when they were man handling his TV. lol

Then the ship crack really kicks in. Fighting the stealing duo together. gimme gimme. Poetry in motion as always. Love to see it. The funniest part is his nephew's reappearance. Cracks me up they were playing the entire time. LOL Of course Genny shows up to see it all. Little bit of levity amongst a sea of intensity during this ep. Also relief the boys will be safe and headed home with her after this.

Oh my word, them talking about his nephews. Be still my damn heart. I love that she had a relationship with them. Not only that she coached them as well. Her joke about the curveball making Tim's smile even wider. Could he be more in love with her? *sad sigh* This is why the breakup destroyed her. Stuff like this. No doubt she thought they were getting married and we're forever. She had relationships with his sister and her kids. Legit ones to the point they miss and ask about her.

Tim was her one and done. The first time she fell in love and thought it was going to be her future. He was going to be her future. Oh Timothy, you really stepped in it when you let her go. My goodness. I love getting peaks into their life outside the station when they were together. This was a fantastic addition to that. The details in this one making me insanely giddy. Too bad we don't get to hear what he told them but hot damn I enjoyed this little tidbit moment.

The immense fire interrupts their lovely moment. They're trapped and have to radio in as such. Grey is one giant ball of panic even thought he's trying to hide it. Despite being his officers those are his friends in real danger. Not only that he is stuck at a command post hoping against hope they make it out. Eric killing me with his expressions once again.

The deep breath he takes before formulating a plan is everything. Suggests they leave the shop ASAP. Just a tinder box waiting to happen. When he said to use a safety blanket I was percolating with excitement. That meant tight quarters and goodness to come. I could feel it. I was legit vibrating this morning as I watched this go down. Tim not giving Lucy a ton of relief saying he saw it on youtube once lol

I absolutely love the role reversal here. Tim is the rambling one. Going on and on. Lucy has to be the one get him to focus. He’s spewing facts that mean nothing to her in this moment. She just needs to know they’re going to be ok. That this is going to work and they're not going to die in this fire.

First time we see Tim come undone and not have the cooler head between them. Lucy has to be the one to get him to focus and give her a straight yes or no answer. Her anxiety can't take the long winded reply. I love her face and hand she puts up letting him know as such. She needs his reassurance not his facts.

This is the meat and potatoes of this scene right here. The sass coming from this man in this scene lmao I love him sfm. 'What, You got somewhere to be?' Oh my lord. These two. Lucy cuts him to the quick. Trying to stop this near death-love confession of his. Tim continuing the sass train saying he could be saying something hateful. LOL Doubtful my love very very doubtful. You forget she knows you just as well as you do her. Lucy continues to try and water down his confession by cutting him off. Saying she knows what he's going to say.

That he's still in love with her. Tim's reply is primo. ‘The arrogance.' This made me cackle. My god this is not the time to be fighting her on this Timothy. Also she’s not wrong babe.... He gives in and says she's not wrong. Of course he still loves her. *heart clutch* Here's what I love the most about him saying this. It's fact that he couldn’t die or possibly let her leave this earth without letting her know he’s still in love with her. That he loves her. That fact still hasn't changed for him. I’m sure he’s worked it out in therapy and lives with the guilt of it daily. Her wondering if he still loved her. If he truly loved her like she loved him.

I remember thinking about that in post 6x06. And it honestly killed me the thought of it. When he broke it off how she must've felt like he didn't love her anymore. Or fell out of love. Or never even cared at all with how he tossed them away. When it was the farthest thing from the truth. Whether she realizes it or not she needed to hear this from him. To hear him say he still loved her. It’ll mean more post this moment than anything else. I think this healed a small part of her. Whether she wanted to hear it or not. I think she sensed it in 6x09 with their hug. With the way he clung to her and told he he wasn't ok till that hug. But this is verbal confirmation for her. He loves her.

Her anger is still shining through when Tim asks if she still loves him? As it should. He DEEPLY wounded her. Also only they could have a near death-love confession and be fighting through the entire thing LOL I love them sfm fandom. I truly do. It's insane how much I do. ‘You are infuriating.’ Doesn't crack or let it slip she loves him back still. Now her non reply truly is her answer. Tim can see that and it's why he says 'So that's a yes?' He knows her. But she is fighting him every step of the way.

Lucy is not going to be an easy nut to crack. Nor should she be. He straight up scarred her for life with that breakup. The carelessness of it. Fuck, it damaged me for sure. This show and this ship are my happy place. I was going through a rough and painful transition in life when it occurred. So it hit me real hard when it happened. My happy place was suddenly not so happy anymore. I struggled with it a lot. Can only imagine how Lucy felt. She has a rock hard exterior slash wall with him. Even facing death she couldn’t verbalize she’s still in love with him too. It risks too much for her. He shattered her heart into a million pieces.

Tim is slowly picking up the many shards but its going to take time. He is going to have to keep chipping away at her wall. Because the scars he left on her heart run very deep. It’s going to take him continuing to try and keep that convo going in order to get her to a good place. A place where she can unleash her pent up anger toward him. To be able to receive his deepest amends to get them on the road to recovery. Loved his 'I know!' He knows he's infuriating. Doesn't fight her and I love the self awareness of his line. The way he cradles her head at the end as they come together. I CANNOT everyone. The tender protection of this has me reeling.

The banter doesn't skip a beat when they emerge. Tim bragging they would make it. Lucy of course doesn't let him get away with it. Because she is wifey and that won't stand. Heh. Gah the way he helps her up. It's so tender and sweet. Once again the little things I adore so very much. Also lets note the look he gives when he radios in 'Code Four.' The man is a glass house of transparency for his feelings. No way she doesn't know he is gone for her even minus the confession.

THIS HUG. OMFG. Tim doesn't hesitate to pull her in. It's the way he holds her holy cow. The moment they have a second to breathe she's in his arms. He needs to grab her and make sure she's really next to him. To ground himself. They legit just survived a near death experience together. The way she falls into him. *happy sigh* Wraps one arm around his back and has her other hand placed intimately on his stomach. I may faint. The wide shot from behind is beautifully done. Showing them what they just made it through together.

It's the way he shuts his eyes and sways with her on the return shot that gets me. Lucy reaching up to touch his stomach once again. Grounding herself through touching him as well. Her eyes filling with tears as she views the destruction they got through. It's such a beautiful moment. I love their hugs SO much. They always convey so much love and emotion in them. Was hoping for a new one this year. Wish granted. The giving season continues to give. This will be my new header for sure. When I find the right gif.

I feel like moments like this I can consider as 'Little doses' He’s trying so hard everyone. He really is. Since s7 started the man has done everything he can while respecting her bounds. Wants to continually show up for her in whatever capacity she'll accept him in. To rebuild her trust in him. Now she’s not there yet and rightfully so. But he’s chipping away slowly with moments like this. This is an amazing moment step forward for them.

Lucy reaches out first in the hospital. Talking about priorities and them being crystallized. Tim looking at her with massive heart eyes when he says his were clear. She is his #1 priority. That has never changed. Even during the breakup she was. Because he was doing it in his mind at the time to protect her. So his priorities have been clear for awhile. But even more so post-therapy. That clarity was sharpened into focus ten fold for him. She is it. It just has taken on a new life and context for him post-therapy.

Lucy does not see what he is throwing down unfortunately. That or she's avoiding reading into what he's saying. I can't decide. That's the beauty of doing my in-depth ones in the summer. Because I'll have the whole season in hand to make a better analysis of that. What I can tell you was Tim wanted to have the convo again. Now his panic is at 100 when she says she needs to move forward. It's pouring out of his eyes the panic of what that means. Striking some terror into his soul. Him worrying she means personally.

Luckily Lucy’s talking about her career instead. Now he is a little dejected still but not nearly as panicked. Agreeing once again just like in 7x06 and letting go of the convo he wants to have....Oh my boy. You’re gonna have to make it happen honey. She is too gun-shy after what you did. You’re gonna have to really really make this happen. Oooh man they’re really gonna make us work for this reconciliation and I’m here for it. Holy hell this season is good. The writers brought it this year I have to say.

Now I know some want a reconciliation already. I get it. Really I do. I miss them being together too. My heart aches and longs for it. BUT they need to really flesh this out. I don't see it as being dragged out so much as worked out. If they don't and they got back together right now people would complain. Saying Tim didn't do the work or work out his shit or take accountability. (Which is he BTW thank you writers for last week) Or that Lucy's feelings are being ignored and she's easily letting him back in. This delay is showing neither of those things are true. Lucy is protecting her feelings and heart still. Tim is really going to have to continually show up for her. They say an apology is useless unless there is changed behavior. He's gotta keep showing her he's changed.

His actions will speak louder than anything. This is going to take time. I keep saying that because it's true. Tim is going to need to continue to put in the work. That way she can get to a place where her feelings are expressed and acknowledged. Where she can truly let him have it and they can move forward. Have that adult convo she was so wrongfully denied in 6x07. When the man was nowhere near ready. He is now. Thing is she isn't ready yet. That's ok. I like them slowing it down to explore them getting fixed in other ways before that convo. Also that it isn't going to be on easy on Tim. You know I love my boy but he's going to have to EARN her back ten times over. It needs to be hard. Now her going for Sergeant? I’m down with.

To quote the legend Alexis Rose. 'Love that journey for you.' This will give her career clarity. I want that so badly for her. Especially if it gets her out of his chain of command. Fixes that issue instantly. Also the smiles happening based on that were so sweet. Tim, literally laying it down, they could be together if she wanted, should she make Sergeant. She smiles with her reply. *screams into pillow* The throw back to 2x02 made me dizzy with happiness. How beautifully full circle would it be for him to help her make Sergeant? To help her study? (loving this idea btw.). The flirty vibes in this scene made me squee. Their base banter is still alive and well. Lucy is flirting right back everyone. This is an excellent sign. Saying they could get a 'Head start early.' Flirty af back at him.

Dumbass Seth comes in and incriminates himself like the idiot he is… Idk what he was thinking saying this in front of not only Lucy but Tim? You little fool. He warned you not to put her in jeopardy. Said you'd regret if you did. My god I fanned myself at his reply to Seth. The feral like stare along with his reply? Hot damn. Get me some ice water. Tim is coming for you dude. Locked and loaded. He told you he would kill you if you put her in harms way. You’re a dead man Ridley. Officially marked my son.

His panic at being caught in his lie is so painfully evident. Trying to cover it up with 'checking in.' on Lucy. Put the Fear of God into them my ass. You couldn't scare a butterfly bro. The knowing shared looks are everything. You just started your countdown clock out of the FTO Seth. They're gonna work together prove what you did. Scorched Earth is coming your way whether you like it or not.

Phew. Holy moly what a good episode. It was incredibly good. End to end fantastic. That seems to be the theme this year. I'm about it. Bummed we have one mini break but after this ep we might need the slight decompression lol

Thank you as always to the amazing people who like, comment (these makes me so happy,) and reblog these. It means more than you can ever know. You are the real MVP's. I'll see you all in a couple weeks for 7x09. It'll be the halfway point which is unreal. Stay excellent my lovely readers.

~~~~

Side notes-non Chenford

Love me some Wopez early in this ep very cute. They are controlled chaos haha Poor Wes stuck with all the kids lol

'Wealthy glamorous widow.' Angela Lopez you are a Queen and I adore you.

Angela's serious talk with Nyla was really good. She didn't listen sadly (at first) but loved her for doing that knowing wouldn't be well received. Nyla is having hard ole time this season. She is starting to crack and it shows.

Good job Nolan with the kid. I like them tapping back into what made him likeable in the first couple of seasons. Also him calling Bailey while she was fighting fires was hilarious. Like I'm a little busy bub lol

Of course Seth hid the note…I mean it got us our moment but still. That is going to come back and end him. Tim and Lucy were affected by this. Grey was SHAKEN by his mishap, Won't just be them coming after him with a vengeance when he is found out.

I love that Nyla listens to Angela at the end and taking care of herself. Too bad it doesn't last long.

Jesus what a way to end the ep poor James......That girl got annihilated no way she makes it.

Glad they posted the viewer discretion advised. My heart goes out to Cali and all they've lost.

[keyofmgy]

wip wednesday

this is so rough of a draft it's ridiculous, but I'm currently attemtping to temporarily conquer my executive dysfunction demons enough to put some Emmrook smut out into the world. post-Memorial Gardens date with inexperienced Rook and down-horrendously-bad Emmrich. I'm gonna go throw up now

I do ask that you at least avoid putting pressure on that stiff left wrist, Emmrich had said to Rook during their dinner in the Memorial Gardens, and he was thinking about it again now, as he watched her all but limp into the Lighthouse’s dining hall. She’d gone to the Anderfels with Davrin and Harding earlier, to help clear out some of the blight surrounding Lavendel. By the look of her, the work had gone beyond merely destroying boils and tentacles. Something heavy-hitting. Hopefully nothing worse than a particularly large specimen of darkspawn. Hopefully no more than one. But he doubted it. He sincerely doubted it. “Darling,” he said in greeting, setting his teacup down on the dining table. Rook shot him a weary but warm smile – the open affection in it still new enough that the sight shot a tingle of a thrill up Emmrich’s spine – but didn’t break her stride as she headed directly for the pot-bellied stove in the far corner of the room. “Hey, Emmrich. All quiet here?” “Of course.” He kept watching her, mentally cataloguing what he saw: the slumped set of her shoulders, the stiff line of her back, the leg she was resting a disproportionate amount of weight on. Responsibility exacts a toll on the body. “Are you all right?” “Yeah.” There was the sound of metal on stoneware, and hot water being poured over tea leaves. Then Rook turned around to face him, blowing out a long sigh, carefully cradling the twin to his own teacup in her hands. “Just a little sore. We got jumped by some darkspawn – nothing we couldn’t handle, though.” She grinned. “Evka can pull some serious moves with that hammer.” Emmrich instinctively smiled back (how could he not?) though he wasn’t quite feeling it; not only was Rook definitely favoring the one leg, she was also still favoring her left wrist. Even more so than she had been at dinner, in fact. But before he could open his mouth to say anything, she was pushing away from the stove, already on the move again, though she did make a detour to briefly rest her forehead against his. Probably, she was hoping to forestall any protest he might make about her needing to take the time to slow down and rest, and damn if it didn’t work perfectly. In that moment his senses were overwhelmed by the rush prompted by even that barest of physical contact – the hint of warmth where they touched, the tickle of her hair against his skin, the knowledge that if he tilted his face upwards just so he could kiss her (and she would allow it). The almost-sour drop of sensation from his chest to his gut when he made the split-second decision to deny himself that pleasure.  We can move slowly, he’d also said to Rook, and he had meant it. No matter that she made him feel like the absolute worst example of a besotted fool, like a horribly naive schoolboy after the high of a first kiss even: eager yet terrified and clumsy but wanting more all at the same time. No, he was the older, more experienced party in this wholly unexpected relationship, and he had a responsibility to Rook to conduct himself like it. He had to set an example. She deserved nothing less than a gentleman who would respect and cherish her – and if she ever settled for less, later in her life, it would be through no failing of his. (Of course Rook would have more lovers, after him. Emmrich wasn’t so idealistic as to believe himself her one and only. That blush of first love would pass, and she would move on. Surely she would never give any serious thought to binding herself to a middle-aged professor with delusions of grandeur, not when she was still so young. But oh, how he would treasure her while it lasted.) “I know what you’re going to say,” she murmured, and he couldn’t help the small intake of breath at the tenor of her voice. “But I’ve got some letters to write and send off. They can’t wait. I’ll rest soon. I promise.”

[11queensupreme11]

I know this would never happen but imagine the absolute MELTDOWN Luisne (don’t think I spelt that right) was sent down to Midgard to live as a human like Apollo was during his punishment

STOP YOU'RE GONNA KILL PERCY AND CÚ CHULAINN 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

but nooooooo poor luisne 😭😭😭😭 she's gonna have a horrible time because she's basically stuck as a ten year old and completely powerless 😭😭😭😭 AND IMAGINE IF SHE WAS BANISHED WHILE WEARING ALL HER JEWELRY AND FINE CLOTHES NOOO THIS POOR KID'S GONNA GET ROBBED 😭😭😭😭😭😭

okay but in a serious sense, she would be in SO much danger. an unaccompanied child in midgard???? omfg she can get murdered, kidnapped, trafficked, etc.

this is gonna be so awful for her because none of the humans KNOW who she is. to them, she's just a rude lil white girl who's loud, mean, and spoiled? who doesn't know how midgard works???? she pisses off the wrong person and she's screwed 💀

i'm trying to search up more myths about breakers of the river styx oath rn, but i couldn't find anything new. i was trying to see if other gods could still contact/communicate with the banished one, but i got nothing 💔💔 (i definitely think the gods could still WATCH them tho)

percy and cú chulainn are gonna be watching over her 25/8 while they're stuck in up in valhalla. while they're forbidden from interacting with her or being near her, they are DEFINITELY going to indirectly help her out. guiding her to safety, keeping danger away, helping her find someone trustworthy (tho cú chulainn doesn't trust ANYONE, but percy knows damn well that a kid can't survive in midgard by themselves for 9 years)

i feel so bad for the parents tho 😭😭 imagine having to watch over your kid, but never being able to actually BE there for them despite wanting to soooo fucking BADLY

oh wait a second. i know a certain someone who went through THIS EXACT SAME ISSUE!!!!!

now percy fully understands what pjo!poseidon went through with HER 💀 now she is in his place. forced to watch and observe and stay away, only able to interfere indirectly. she understands now how powerless her father felt, and it drives her crazy. she wonders if luisne ever feels abandoned and bitter despite knowing that her parents can't do much. does she think mommy and daddy don't love her? were there times where she felt abandoned by them? times where she felt resentful for their lack of presence?

percy and pjo!poseidon had to go through this for her whole life. at least this only lasts 9 years with luisne, but it's still agonizing for both sides, and now percy fully understands how the gods in her og universe felt.

[whysoblue2]

Honestly, I'm just excited to see the Kallamar and Shamura co-dependant toxic sibling relationship they've got going on, I gotta know just how nasty it got at its different stages and how it likely ended up affecting how they raised their other siblings. I love platonic toxic stuff like this, I would ponder if it could count as Shamura being a bit yandere at some point during it but idk if you're comfortable with that sort of comparison and I don't know much about their relationship besides what you have told. I need the DETAILS, the DRAMA

OOOH yeah, their relationship is juicy and hella toxic in my HC. I'm not going to lie, it's bad, but I wouldn't go so far as being yandere. Travis is 100% yandere. Let's see if I can explain. Long post on my silly headcanon ahead! You have been warned!

Young Shamura god of war, ruthless and merciless. An extremist that has the mission to reshape the Pantheon as they see in their vision, over the blood and bones of other gods. This lil squidling god still didn't unlock the power of his crown and that's perfect because, to Shamura, that is a white canvas, something they can shape the way they want, also the lil shit can heal? A big plus! So they bring said lil shit on the battlefield and train him the way they think is right, following their doctrines and ofc it's really bad. I mean Young Shamura displayed the same empathy of a floor tile, only Kall's influence changed that as I mentioned in a previous post I think. Imagine the Trade meme with Shamura: I receive: The ability to love and care You receive: Trauma and life-long fear But as the squid grows up they realise he does have a personality, he is not a blank slate and he wants to do his own thing, he loves art, music, dancing, and all those meaningless things that won't matter in a war. Also, he wants to go and slay gods (and slay in general💅🏻) his own way! AND THAT'S BAD! Because after so many years fighting together, Kallamar is not just a brother-in-arms but the only family they have! The realisation struck: he was their beloved little brother! Shock ensues. But Shamura doesn't know how to deal with it outside tactics, strategies and warfare so to protect his little brother, they treat him like a war asset with everything that it entails. (I let your imagination run wild here.) Things will happen that will finally make Kall snap and unlock the power of the blue crown, turning him from health to pestilence. From there things will go smoother. Shamura will accept that he has his own personality/cult/followers, but that doesn't mean they like it. They most definitely won't like it when Kall starts dating disciples and mortals. Good luck with that one, Shamura, it's gonna be fun! Of course, this is in the span of centuries while the god slaying and war rages on, not exactly the easiest of times. How will that affect the way they raise the siblings?

As Narinder enters the game, Shamura will find the cat easier to deal with and they focus on raising him, trying not to repeat the same mistakes they made with Kallamar. When Narinder joined, Kallamar would always follow them in their training, terrified that Shamura would use the same extreme methods on the kitten. He is pleasantly surprised to see that while being hard on the kid, they are not nasty and they show care! Yay! (in the meanwhile, it will dawn on him - not true ofc - that he doesn't matter to Shamura anymore and that Narinder has replaced him. The fact he had to endure the bad Shamura for so long and when finally they were good Shamura, they didn't give a damn about him anymore hurts a lot.) Then Kall is responsible for raising both Heket and Leshy singlehandedly. Shamura had very little part in training Heket (she arrived as the war was ending) and none at all in Leshy (who had never seen war at all in his life), so the joys of being a big brother/dad are all on him. But that meant he would do everything possible to not be like Shamura! He could do better, right? Wrong! The backlash of this is that he is way too soft and understanding, to the extent that the young ones don't take him seriously at all, so they grow up basically bullying the shit out of him.

I CANNOT GIVE YOU MORE DETAILS! Cause I'm gonna write them in the fic 😈 Drama&Angst guaranteed. I hope that's a good enough answer!💙 Thank you!

[trainingthots]

This cannot be to me Delicacy Love,

I do not think if you as anything of the sort, and if anyone is the Narcissistic Ass it is me. I love every single one of your flaws, especially your tendency to project your insecurity onto others. I do the same things only much worse. I am not using anything against you, i do not fight against you. Its one if the problems in our relationship, that i never could tell you no and that your self loathing meant my love for you made me the least desirable person in the god damn world to you. This man, so easy to degrade and humiliate, to use and despise their girl, got spun around and lost when i met you and fell in love. All of a sudden out of my element i only wanted to love, care and respect you, but had no idea how to do that because of the toxic awful person i was. When i felt like j was never going to get to love you and have you completely, i frustrated and angry at myself for being so ineffectual at the one thing i wanted did what i always do, fuck it all up and pretend that i only failed because it wasnt worth doing. How wrong i was. How wrong i still am if i make you feel this way. But the facts dont line up. I have not been critical of you, i am dealing with pain and loss, but it is helping me realize my awful mistakes and filling me with regret and the urge to do better and right by you. This is once again orobably not for me but for the man you actually love. I am so tired of gim being the one who breaks your heart. I am not the jealous type, but i am amgry that while i am hurt from finding out about all my pain and losing you, i feel so much empathy for you being jn pain from losing him. I am a total pathetic mess. I am sorry for your loss, and i hope to be there for you while you grieve.

You are not unlovable, and the abandonment thing is something i have always accepted and ignored. You have abandoned me so many times its ludicrous. I am not belittling you. I am trying to understand your growth and change while ignoring my own pain. Once again i am not doing the best job, but i am trying.

Nothing I do or post js against you. If someone is doing that it is not me. There is a lot of stuff done in my name that is not me these days. Close your eyes, open your heart and know i would never intentionally hurt you. It is all love from me. I will not criticize you, i will not shame you, i will not even tell people what is going on with me because it risks people thinking poorly on you, and i will not have it.

Forever Your Cheerleader,

The Marquis De Sad

Unlovable

To you,

I'm a narcissist and you know it's true. I've projected all my insecurities just to protect this fragile ego. Now that you've exposed me, I can admit the truth about my low self-esteem and self-worth. I'm temperamental and throw tantrums like a child. I'm narrow-minded and get defensive in arguments. I hide the truth about my life because I genuinely hate myself and all my flaws. It's who I am. 

Thank you for showing me how little respect you have for me. I now understand your intentions of making me feel the pain and dishonesty I have inflicted onto you. There's no need for defending myself at this point if you feel encouraged to make me feel like the most ruthless immature person that has existed. I'm glad you feel a sense of fulfillment in your quest to making me aware of the hateful person I am. 

It's true that I'm unlovable. Everything I attach myself to doesn't truly belong to me. I chose to abandon both myself and others, so please continue writing about how much you despise me. Use everything against my will to prove to me that I was a mistake in your life. I deserve to be agonized and shamed for trying to love you.

You said it yourself that I look like shit, so please let me continue to deteriorate alone. I am unworthy of love and believe I will continue to be just an option. To tell you the truth, you were the first person I felt comfortable being around without a mask. I could be my most authentic autistic self with you, without fear that you'd abandon me for my weirdness. When I felt unsafe, you were always the first person I’d turn to because I gave you the key to my tender heart. I guess it never meant anything anyways.

The narcissist in me is frustrated that I can't control your desire to use my pictures, trauma, and love against me. If you wish to continue belittling me just to prove how terrible a human I am, you've already done an amazing job. And still, I can never hate you because I already hate my life, and you don't deserve that. I'm sorry for being unlovable. 

Me

February the last, 1966 Anne Sexton, from Complete Poems

[statementlou]

Tbh i am not surprised that a person who openly talked about having drinking problems since 1d days, because of how crazy 1d worked has been agressive. What surprises me is people being surprised (they never seriously saw drunk person?). But i am also confused about this whole book. Apparently Maya said that that book is not fully bout Liam but compilation about her exes and some of the worst parts are not about him. But recently she said that the book is “ofc about him” so what is true then? Or did she meant it that ofc some parts are about him or that whole book is about him?

Sorry, just confused

I also am not surprised- we've learned so much more about the real stories of things and about the guys' actual lives over the last years, and the story that has unfolded around Liam has been totally consistent throughout if you've been following it, and so the information Maya is telling us is shocking and upsetting but not difficult to believe. I got an anon yesterday saying they were worried about getting similar revelations about the other boys, like "if Liam could be doing this we just don't know, any of them could", and while in a way that's always true I guess, anyone could be doing anything in private like... that doesn't really concern me. Because none of these Liam revelations are coming out of nowhere, there have been many MANY steps along the way leading us here if you've been watching, and he has talked openly about both his mental health struggles and his addiction issues. So to answer that anon... to find out something similar about Louis would in contrast contradict everything we know about him and no I'm not worried about it. Is he an abuser or a loose cannon, well that news would truly shock me to my core, I will be honest. But anyway as for the book I don't find it strange that she was nervous when it came out and treading lightly and later decided, fuck it. In the absolutely on point tiktok she dropped today (YES👏GIRL👏FUCKING TELL THEM👏) she even mentions attempts to keep her from publishing the book, presumably by Liam's team, that I am riveted by and cannot WAIT to hear more details about actually- like I said I don't find it at all strange that she was nervous and downplayed it a bit then. But if she says now that it's just about Liam, well, I would say it's been clear from the beginning that the book is their story. Maya herself brought up the parallel of songs being written about stuff and I think it's the same thing; it's true (she was in an abusive relationship that involved certain kinds of events) but maybe not 100% literal (I'm sure details were changed to make the story work, it's not like a word for word timeline of their interactions or whatever).

[ismyteadoneyet]

How fortunate am I to have so many Things to love and be excited about, to appreciate and look forward to?

Things I feel so strongly about that they stumble into my mind, univited, at random times of the day? Things that spill into my speech and vocabulary without me noticing? Things that impact my vision to the point where everywhere I look, everywhere I go, I see ghosts of them?

How lucky am I to have so many Things I love and cherish enough for them to reshape my very person, change my beliefs and make me grow? Things that make my own loved ones see the Things out in the wild, and go out of their way to make sure I see them too?

How wonderful is it that I have Things that I love so much that the very act is deemed and dubbed "not normal", making my love for them seem like it's more than they are supposed to recieve? An out-of-the-ordinary and above-the-norm appreciation for the Things that make the people around me shake their heads, call me "silly".

My dear, beloved Things, may I always stay silly for you ❤️

[astoriacolumnstaircase]

i think i will talk more about this actually. I don't know how many times over the course of the campaign that i wanted to write meta, or engage with other fans, and I shut my computer and walked away because I couldn't find the words that could be innocuous enough that they could not invite mockery. And I hated that any time I started to write up something i found interesting about my favorite character I had this fear hanging over me, that i wasn't the right kind of fan, and that i'd be held up as another example of some short sited, self-obsessed imodna girlie, who, if not an actual teenager, probably thinks like a teenager. Which, setting aside the unnecessary hate that teens get for literally existing in a transitive stage in their lives, is deeply reductive, and personally pretty damn hurtful. I don't want to get into the personal reasons there. Sorry.

I wonder how many insightful commentaries tumblr has missed out on because other fans of campaign three have felt the same way. Even now I find myself typing out a sentence and deleting it right after. How much of that is from a fear of being misunderstood?

I think, as frustrating as this is, to be a fan and to seek out community only to find the things i like best in the show mocked as juvenile and stupid, it has been illuminating. When I was younger, and when I wrote my own fiction, original works, I was so scared that everything I wrote would be picked apart and sifted into pieces until someone could find it objectionable, and decide that I'm secretly some kind of monster for writing such objectionable things. And now, after watching a show that means a lot to me, and a character that hit so close to my heart, be judged as "ultimately not it, babe," I know that there are some people in this world who will never understand what i want to write, and if somehow, i break out of my small circles in the publishing world and someone decides to pick apart every bit of my work for how awful and objectionable and not it I really am, I'll know that I'm just not for them.

I don't know how coherent this is. I don't write outside of fiction often for a reason. My words get gummed up. I think i will talk about what i loved in c3, and Laudna especially, in some posts that are not a part of this... whatever this is. Ultimately what I want is to talk joy and disappointment without the baggage of apologia, and I can't do that here. I don't know if I can do that on tumblr at all.

Man it'd be so cool if i could go on tumblr and talk about my favorite campaign or my favorite character without having to write like an apologist.

[some-pers0n]

Every once in a while I think about the ship I've been obsessed over for close to two years now and feel like I'm ascending to another plane of reality. Like sometimes you just encounter a ship that hits every single mark and is perfect in every regard and you're left stunned how something like that can even exist

[ahopefulbromantic]

wait do you believe in hell as eternal conscious torment? (im curious bc that debate has been a crux of my own journey w faith & christianity)

I believe in hell as eternal disconnection from God or more precisely as defined by the Catechism a "state of definitive self-exclusion from communion with God and the blessed" (CCC 1033). How that would look like i have no idea but i do know that tearing yourself apart from the one and only source of life, love, happiness, fulfilment, goodness, and everything that is good would absolutely be the worst torment imaginable, or rather well, unimaginable. And i do know God would hate to have His beloved children be in this state. I hope with all my heart that hell is completely empty, i wouldn't wish it upon anyone and i mean anyone

Oh and since you mentioned a debate, can you tell me more about it? Cause i'm not sure what you're refering to and i'd love to learn more! God bless you anon and best wishes for your journey with faith!

[svtskneecaps]

FRIENDS I HAVE BEEN PLAYING WITH SOME OF THE QSMP MODS AND I AM FROTHING AT THE MOUTH

BEHOLD THESE THREE PARTICULAR BLOCKS FROM THE FRAMEDBLOCKS MOD!!!!! FROM LEFT TO RIGHT, THE "FRAMED SECRET STORAGE", THE "FRAMED DOOR", AND THE "FRAMED ONE-WAY WINDOW"

FRAMED SECRET STORAGE, A BLOCK WITH SOME STORAGE THAT CAN BE CAMOUFLAGED TO LOOK LIKE WHATEVER BLOCK YOU DESIRE!!!! WANT TO BUILD YOUR WHOLE HOUSE OUT OF CHESTS AND STILL MAINTAIN AESTHETIC?? GO FOR IT!! HAVE SECRET CONTRABAND BUT NEED EASY ACCESS? HIDE IT RIGHT IN YOUR WALLS!!!

THE FRAMED DOOR, ABLE TO BE CUSTOMIZED TO LOOK LIKE A WALL!! THE TOP AND BOTTOM CAN BE ASSIGNED BLOCKS INDEPENDENTLY!!

SECRET TUNNEL!!!!!!!!!

THE FRAMED ONE-WAY WINDOW!! ANY ONE SIDE OF THIS BLOCK CAN BE MADE TRANSPARENT, INCLUDING THE TOP AND BOTTOM!!! the transparency can also be REMOVED, so if your friend forgets to look at the name of the block their crosshair is on, YOU CAN TOTALLY PRETEND IT'S A TOTALLY NORMAL SOLID BLOCK AND ADD THE TRANSPARENCY ONLY WHEN NECESSARY >:D

NEEDLESS TO SAY, I AM SO EXCITED FOR WHEN THE PARANOID MEMBERS WITH MANY SECRETS AND MANY THINGS TO HIDE DISCOVER THESE BLOCKS HEHEHEHEHEHE. AS SOMEONE WHO LOVES AND CHAMPIONS ESPIONAGE THIS CONSTITUTES AN ABSOLUTE WIN

[littleoddwriter]

desperately need The Batman Part II's main villain to be Roman Sionis/Black Mask, please. I'm on my hands and knees, begging for it

[morrigan-sims]

another late night / early morning wip pic under the cut

>:)

[mymarifae]

this is literally so fucking funny. someone PLEASE save nene