#but the bridge actually kinda works so well for them that does it even matter

[bellamysgriffin]

A GIFSET FOR EVERY TAYLOR SWIFT SONG Florida!!! [10/243]

[lurkinggirlie]

Elain & Azriel are EndGame

Azriel’s bonus chapter: semi-essay on my thoughts

This post will be a long one. The shipwar has been going on for far too long, and there's a possiblity that we'll be getting closure soon. So, I want to put my thoughts out there. For Obvious reasons, I could be very wrong, but this is what I think based on canon text: (Ignore any errors..I haven't edited this, and I'm sure there are many posts like this that are way more articulate)

Elriel are endgame. If they’re not then Azriel is kinda pathetic and having him end-up with anyone else is bad writing and character assassination. (Which we sadly won’t put past sjm but I don’t think she would..at least I hope)

1- Elain has no other love interest. Yes, Lucien is her mate but we have hinted at a broken/rejected mating bond for the longest time when it comes to these two so having them accept it eventually is going to be quite underwhelming, repetitive and boring. Even Lucien seems to have given up/isn’t interested in bridging that gap between them, which we’re told in both acofas and acosf. Unless you want to count the longing pointed out by Cassian, although Cassian also pointed out that Lucien was also uncomfortable when he mentioned his mate. To add on, there is no sexual tension between the two, and we know how important that is for sjm’s couple. You can't keep whining "but Elain isn't giving him a chance, if only she gave him a chance, then maybe this and maybe that" Elain is not a seprate entity, she is what SJM writes, Sjm could have written that but she did not yet and I'm not sure if she will. It feels too late at this point, she had already shown us that Elain has feelings for someone else aka Azriel. The author doesn't have to spell everything out for us to understand to what's going on. Sarah usually makes it clear who's endgame. and she literally is. So, it would be very sudden and out of the blue if Lucien and Elain were to end up together when she had never shown it before. When even Azriel pointed this out “I think Lucien will never be good enough for her, and she has no interest in him, anyway” people can say Rhys killed elriel, that the bonus chapter ended them. But this line right here tells us otherwise! First we know Azriel and Elain can read each other so well that they don’t need words, and then Azriel tells us this. He’s literally telling us that Elain does not want Lucien.

We also cannot compare elucien to Feysand or Nessian in the “enemies to lovers" department, because these two seem to hardly care about each other. For obvious reasons she wouldn’t accept or reject Lucien in a book that isn’t hers. But if they do end up together I’d feel robbed that she had more sexual tension with Azriel than she did with Lucien. And we know that Nessian and Feysand had sexual tension before getting together. Most of what we got from Elain and Lucien was awkwardness, and discomfort. Not a single spark. Furthermore, it would feel like Azriel was just leading Elain own. Plus their romance (Lucien and Elain)  would not feel organic, only getting with Lucien because she felt rejected by Azriel, which doesn’t give epic romance no matter how sjm tries to spin it. It would always make Lucien seem like the second choice.

2- Azriel regifting the necklace was a dickhead move, and offensive to both girls. Anyone thinking the regifting of the necklace ended elriel or started gwynriel is delusional and clearly doesn’t know how the romance genre works. (should’ve thrown the gift in the Sidra like Cassain did) I can’t believe Rhys isn’t paying Azriel enough that he felt the need to return the necklace to the shop instead of throwing it. Senstive Illyrian baby indeed. 

3- Rhys saying stay away from Elain (can we take a moment to appreciate how sexy Rhys was for pulling rank, he really made the ship more interesting now) and Azriel actually listening to him?? When he told him you can’t order me to do that. shit would be underwhelming if Azriel actually stayed away? Hello? Secret relationship potential ? Hello? Forbidden romance potential  ??? The tropes would be epic. Sjm had never done that. And I’m not saying she will, but this is how I see it playing out. + Azriel saying it was a mistake to Elain, and Elain apologizing?? The fact she was confused/hurt and probably thought she misunderstood the whole situation? SHE IS BABYGIRL?? Regardless, Azriel saying it was a mistake and it being a mistake is NOT it. This is not how romance works most of the time. This is such a basic romantic trope, why are a lot of people misinterepting it? Elain deserves better, and sjm isn’t about to hurt Elain’s feelings without making it up to her. And she’s definitely not making Azriel end up with another girl before he fixes that shit. I will be needing a proper apology to Elain.  

4- Whenever people think of the bonus chapter they weigh in Azriel’s feelings far more than Elain’s. It’s clear that Elain and Azriel’s feelings are MUTUAL, ignore the bonus chapter and it’s right there in the actual book. I don’t think Elain got the memo that Azriel had  a conversation with another girl after he hurt her feelings which made him realize he’s in love all of a sudden. *sarcasm*  that would be very out of character for Azriel. 

5- His chest sparkling at the thought of Gwyn getting the necklace was so??? I have been saying he’s for the streets and yes this was out of pocket. So, I understand people shipping them. However it could mean anything really, you can't continue saying that Gwyn in the bonus has to mean something, and that that spark must mean somethig but continue to disreagrd every single Elriel interaction like they mean nothing. Because for it to be taken as romance we’d have to ignore the beginning of the bonus, the feysand’s bonus acosf/acomaf/acowar and acofas. + we could easily take this in a platonic way, which is how I viewed it when I read the bonus. Not everything has to be romantic. And sjm will NOT introduce a new guy to make him end up with Elain since we already established Elain doesn’t want Lucien and Lucien doesn’t want her either. 

6- I know that a lot of people have theories about Gwyn being a lightsinger and all of this happening because of her powers (While I do think this is very smart, it wasn’t something I thought of so I won’t talk about it). I do think it’s possible, and all the theories I saw were really cool but idk where sjm is going with this, so to make it simple I do think it could be because she’s his student, she went through a lot it could simply be platonic happiness that a girl who went through so much is going to be happy about something. Even if it was a secondhand necklace specifically picked with ANOTHER girl in mind PLUS I do think sjm wanted drama, and for people to doubt elriel cuz now they have all these obstacles, so Gwyn would be the easy choice, but the second choice regardless. The relationship would feel icky and I genuinely cannot see the potential gwynriels keep talking about. I would take the ship a lot more seriously if a) he didn’t regift her another girl’s necklace b) there was more to them in the actual book. c) he wasn’t still upset about it 3 days later… 

7- There’s a high possibility Gwyn never even got the necklace..

He gave it to Clotho not Gwyn, he didn’t want his name mentioned, and then said if any other girl would like it to give it to them: the aim was to get rid of Elain’s necklace. It’s sort of a parallel with Cassain throwing away Nesta’s present.

I think it’s possible that Azriel went there because he knows how much the girls in the library have suffered, especially since his mom did too, it's possible he thought "okay this is a pretty necklace, I don't want to hold onto the reminder of what could've been, so instead of throwing it let another girl be happy about it. At least it won’t go to waste��

Clotho could tell there was something wrong, like maybe she sensed the energy and decided ayeee let me keep this aside for him, he might come back and ask for it. 

The bonus did not happen at the end of the book 

If Azriel was truly in love with Gwyn now /or he wanted her/ or more between them was going to happen/ or they were mates according to some theories we could have AT LEAST gotten more after the bonus. 

We know the bonus happened after solstice.

Nesta mentions that Azriel was stone-faced and more aloof than usual, he wouldn’t even give her a smile. That was 3 days after the necklace situation. I think it would’ve been a great opportunity to highlight any attraction between Azriel and Gwyn.

Maybe he sees the necklace around her neck, maybe Nesta and Emerie compliment Gwyn’s necklace, or Gwyn telling them she doesn’t know who it’s from, maybe they tease her that someone might have a crush on her. Nesta could’ve pointed out that Azriel was looking at Gwyn’s necklace.or looking at Gwyn in some sort of way. Literally anything. 

Anyone pointing out the way Azriel and Gwyn looked at each other. A charged glance perhaps. Literally ANYTHING. We only got him looking at her with admiration which is very teacher coded. 

If sjm hadn’t made Nesta realize Azriel had a thing for Elain then maybe gwnyriel would’ve been more appealing to me. But no, Nesta noticed. This doesn’t mean nothing people.

aside from that we got nothing romantic, but a part of the fandom still acts like we need to exile Elain because she’s coming between Gwyn and Azriel’s epic love story.

Not everyone has access to the bonus.  

The Azriel chapter was only in ONE store in the US, but Feysand’s bonus chapter was in 3 stores in the US and UK. I don't know but something tells me it’s more important.  Soooo if SJM would do a love interest switch she would not do it in a bonus chapter, and wouldn’t be highlighting the Az/Elain interactions in ACOSF as much as she did. 

Feyre’s chapter focuses on Elain, it literally tells us Elain is next once we’re done helping Nesta. EASY MATH. and the Azriel bonus also focuses on elriel/Azriel’s feelings. ENDGAME MATERIAL RIGHT HERE. 

But the girls swear up and down that Gwyn and Azriel’s book is next because of a secondhand necklace. 

Let’s assume elriels are the delusional ones (like so many of them say), how do we explain these. 

Casual readers who usually read books and aren’t on the internet and aren’t looking for bonus content (wish that was me)  (lord knows I skipped every bonus chapter in throne of glass and crescent city and I wasn’t confused about anything. Not even once) so they’d expect answers for 

The Charged glance between Azriel and Elain

Azriel following the sound of Elain’s laughter. 

Elain looking away when Azriel smiled at her during family dinner, Cassian god bless him that idiot could NOT piece all of that together. BUT it was still highlighted through his POV ???

His secret to tell never hers (and we do learn of that secret in the bonus but people who didn’t read it could only guess so they’d want a confirmation) and sjm did say in one of her lives that Nesta learns of one of Azriel’s secrets (she looked all giddy about it)... and that Azriel is going through some shit right now…and we learn why from the bonus chapter. 

Cassian being confused that it seems like Azriel moved on from Mor

Nesta pointing out that Elain moved on from Graysen

Cassian wondering why Elain is lying about where she’s going. (I viewed this as her avoiding Azriel but idk) 

Azriel’s protectiveness of Elain. He gives mate behavior without the mate part. (I will hit him on the head though omg let my girl do something)

Elain willing to look for the troves even when Nesta wasn’t, the girl wants to do something  (her journey is coming next) 

Nesta wondering if Elain is training with Azriel or the twins (who are spies that were trained by Azriel !!!) 

Feyre telling Azriel that Elain got him beat for secret keeping. Sure it might sound delusional but Elain keeps being compared to Az/being a spy and maybe this could be a thing. 

Elain speaking back to her sisters about them treating her like a child?? Hello finally 

The way Elain’s mother only treated her like a pretty doll which shaped up Elain’s whole life??? I want this from Elain’s POV sooo bad 

In conclusion, we’re not pausing Elain’s story so Azriel can end up with a side character in a spinoff about an og side character, we’re sticking to our og side characters for now.

Azriel being over Mor because of Elain, and Elain moving on from Graysen because of Azriel only for Elain to get over Azriel to be with Lucien (who we got nothing from aside a mating bond..) and for Az to get over Elain and questioning fate for her…only to end up with gwyn…like I don’t think anyone could take Azriel’s feelings seriously if this happens. Shit will be too goofy.  Because if he ends up with Gwyn who says he won’t move on to the next pretty girl he sees afterwards.

To add to that, what plot would we have for Azriel and Gwyn. We'll get more Valkyries training, more healing journey so the plot would have to be paused for this. Nesta’s book was mostly about her healing journey and friendship, while it was nice I don’t want a repeat for the next book. Especially since we know the Rite took a toll on Gwyn, she went back to the library, wasn’t even sure she would make it to Nessian’s mating ceremony. This doesn’t give the protagonist of the next book to me. Or "I thought it was pretty obvious"

Elain’s healing journey had started in ACOWAR, she got her friends in ACOWAR. Now is their TIME to do something!! She is next. 

Closing thoughts on what I think would happen based off each ship happening: 

If elriel happens = new sjm couple dynamic/interesting plot. Fresh sjm protagonist that is unlike sjm's others + we don’t ignore all the foreshadowing and hints. We follow the love triangle we set up in the og trilogy + finally get a rejected mating bond. And instead of warrior training we might get spy training and instead of physical power (as far as we know) we get something more mental. Again this is very new for sjm + there’s a lot to Elain’s power that we don’t know and since Azriel was the one who found out what she was, I think it would make more sense for him to know how to help her. Imagine the sexual tension during training..yes please. I hope sjm doesn’t rob me. Elain is really mysterious, we got Nesta’s inner thoughts before her book but we still haven't gotten a peep about Elain’s inner thoughts and I’m just dying to know more. AND THE STAKES!

1) Rhys forbidding Azriel from Elain, 2) Elain’s mating bond,3) Azriel’s self doubt and how he doesn’t think he’s good enough. 4) The blood duel and the political mess we could get into. (Lucien probs won't but what if Beron would, the breeding potential, A seer must be a powerful thing she can see things others can't and I think that’s valuable. If Eris thought Nesta was valuable as cauldron made and there was no potential there, so The Autumn court probably feels even more entitled to Elain) We have high inner and outer stakes. I have a feeling SJM will fumble all this potential but a girl can dream 

If elucien happens = another successful mating bond + “enemies”  to lovers sort of but they won’t ever be mean to each other so maybe not enemies, just dislike and awkwardness to friends to lovers?  We ignore the hints about a rejected bond and in mating bonds we trust. We also ignore all the elriel hints, and their mutual feelings. We follow the love triangle set up in the og trilogy. I don’t think Lucien could train her in anything? Maybe self defense, Idk Sarah could pull something, but I don’t see Elain leaving her circle of friends but neither do I see Lucien settling in the night court and leaving his own friends. There are no stakes but Elain’s and Lucien’s awkwardness around each other + Elain’s feelings for Azriel. Elain’s and Lucien’s plot connects though so at least there’s that, SJM could ship them off on a mission together and make them get closer. Forced proximity sort of thing. 

If gwynriel happens then = we lost the whole plot, ignored the foreshadowing and hints found in the actual book. Mentor to lovers, civil with each other. Azriel has to move on from Elain first though and that could be icky. Healing journey, more Valkyries training. So we pick up from where we left off in acosf, and we’d see Azriel trying to get her to come out of the Library, or he goes to visit her there until she agrees to come out again. Maybe if Gwyn is a lightsinger then idk more training with Azriel? Again, no stakes but Gwyn’s trauma and Azriel’s self doubt oh and also his feelings for Elain. But that’s it, Gwyn as of now does not connect to the overall plot with the troves (she’s not made therefore she can’t use them) or koschei. So I don’t see us making her go on a mission like that. I’ve seen a lot of gwynriles saying Gwyn has spy potential idk where, but she could barely keep a secret for Nesta so I highly doubt she’d be keeping secrets for the IC. 

Ps: the original koschei plot is 3 sisters marrying 3 very powerful wizards and like idk 3 sisters 3 brothers…we can have a retelling ya know 

[sinsandsweetness]

Rickyl but they’re just mean, like real mean. Consensual obviously but they’re just kinda like use you for stress relief. Free use kink and all that jazz.

notes- I wanna be their free use housewife so bad... Thank you anon I so fuck with this. (Would do nsfw head canons for this if y’all wanted) Also I know you said mean, but I chose to keep it a little bit tame for this one. I can do mean though if you rlly want…

warnings- free use kink, throat fucking, sex, smut, slight degradation but also praising? pet names, slight daddy usage (only 2 times I think) <3

STRESS RELIEF

They entered the house all huffy and scowling. Slamming doors shut with their twitching faces. Clearly pissed off. Both of them. You figured it had something to do with Negan, given all the Savior drama going on lately.

They’d both been pretty on edge as of late. And It really wasn’t taking much to set Daryl off. You’d learned that the hard way. Rick could keep it together a little better. But not by much. So you debated with yourself what to do. You tried to wait until they calmed down, fidgeting with your nails as they loudly stormed up to your bedroom. Waiting and listening to their muffled conversation from the bottom of the stairs. Unable to make out any real words, your curiosity got the best of you. So you went upstairs, your soft footsteps were silent on the cushiony carpet. Quietly knocking on the bedroom door, you asked if everything was ok. Not knowing wether you should actually go on in or leave and give them some space. Rick pinched the bridge of his nose, mumbling something about the Saviors under his breath. Daryl shook his head and sighed.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You asked sweetly, walking further into the room. Trying to be the supportive little angel you worked so hard to be.

Neither answered. Just clenched their jaws and fought off their tempers. Not that you did anything wrong. But some days, they could be… mean. A little bit anyway. When they were seeing red and weren’t thinking clearly before they spoke. When they’d snap at you after a long day and their words end up making you bite your lip and your eyes gloss over. They never meant it. Not really. And they always felt bad after. But it happened here and there. You’d never blame them. They just have a lot on their plates. So you take their apologies as well as you can. As well as you take everything else that they give you.

You looked up with doe eyes. Trying to get a read on the situation. What you could tell for sure, was that they did not want to talk about it.

But… they did need to let their frustrations out somehow.

The two of them a shared a look that you’d come to recognize pretty well. The muscles in their face starting to relax the slightest bit at their silent agreement. Imagining the filthy things they were about to do to you.

“No. No talking.” Rick shook his head. Finally answering your question.

You swallowed. Feeling like maybe the room was closing in on you. Just the littlest bit. The way the two men seemed to stalk even closer. Closing in on you.

“Could use your help though. With something else.” Daryl said, chewing the inside of his lip.

“W- what’s that?” You stutter. Pathetic. They hadn’t even touched you yet.

But you knew what was coming. That strange, far away look in their eyes. Focused on one thing and one thing only.

Using you.

“Strip.” Rick ordered, pulling at the hem of your shirt as you tear it off. You, being the good girl you are, were eager to please. Quickly taking your jeans off and kicking them to the side before Rick shoved you by the shoulder, forcing you to bend right over the edge of the bed.

Before you know it, you’re a absolute mess. Drunk off their cocks. Off the way they can’t keep their grabby hands to themselves. How they shove you around til they have you where they want. And fuck you exactly how they want. For however long the want. It never mattered.

You were too in love for it to ever matter.

Drool was running down your chin as your jaw went slack, allowing Daryl to fully fuck your throat to the exact pace he needed. Both hands fisting your hair as his breaths got shorter and heavier. Grunting as he switched between throwing his head back and looking down, trying his absolute hardest not to take his eyes off your pretty face.

And Rick was behind you, fingers digging hard into your hips as he pulled you back against him. He hadn’t even bothered to take your panties off, instead just pulling them to the side. Lace stretching and tearing as he pounded into you. His eyes widened as he let out the sweetest little whimper at the sight of your creamy substance coating the base of his cock. Slapping your ass with a sharp sting. Earning yet another muffled moan from your throat. He started to fuck you faster and harder, with zero regard to your comfort or pleasure.

You didn’t mind. You never do. This was for them. Not you. They’d make up for it another time. For now, you were just their pretty little sex doll, used solely to blow off some steam. You loved it. Fuck did you ever love it. Their filthy broken up sentences, praising you for how well you took them.

“Our good little slut. Always takin’ us so well, ain’t you?”

“It’s like this pussy was made for us. Just for us to use and abuse, ain’t right baby?”

And you’d gag around Daryl’s dick even more, trying to answer with a “yes.” “Yes daddy. Made for you. Both of you. Only you.” They loved that. The fact that you agree with them. That you’d do absolutely anything they ask. And even better, that you’d let them do anything they want. That you were forever getting off on being your daddies little fuck toy.

Rick kept slapping your ass, delivering quick short blows to the tender skin as you squeaked in pain. Tears threatening to fall as the two of them fucked the life out of you. But even then, not a word. Not a complaint to be heard. Everything was okay, perfect even, now that you were making your boys feel better. And that’s all that mattered. That’s what you were there for.

They picked up their pace at the sound of all the dirty noises escaping you. Fucking you even harder until they both came with a groan. Filling you up with their seed. Forced to take their loads, you swallowed every drop that Daryl gave you as you felt Ricks starting to drip and run down your leg.

You watch their chests as their breathing starts to even out. All three of you lazily slumped onto the bed. You situated right in between them, thinking about how badly you still have to cum. About how you were so fucking close when they stopped. Thinking that you should have said something, and let them draw it out of you. Even if it meant a few extra spankings for being a selfish little slut.

You squeezed your legs together to try and relieve the need. Daryl noticed first. Both of them finally coming down from their aggressive little high, minds able to focus in on you again.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” He teased. Knowing that you were probably a little too shy to tell him.

Daryl would grab your hands, pulling them from between your legs. Whimpering as silently as you could manage, at the loss.

“You need more, angel? Is that it? We gotta get you all filled up again?” Rick would chime in, both of their words causing the heat to rise to your cheeks.

“What do you want, sweetie?”

You couldn’t answer. Eyes shifting between them and settling on the blanket in front of you.

“Tell us.” Rick grabbed your jaw and forced you to look at him.

You tried to shake your head. To shove the feelings down and away.

“Tell us, or it’s not happening.”

“Need… need to cum.” Your voice barely even a whisper. Eyes fluttering closed in embarrassment.

And they both let out a quiet laugh. Ricks hand coming down to cup your cunt, the friction of his palm against your panties never failing to make you moan. Daryl started at your breasts, groping you so that your nipples rise in to sensitive little peaks.

“You didn’t really think we were done now, did you?”

-

taglist: @rickswh0r3 , @elnyrae

(comments and reblogs are always appreciated, xoxo)

[ifyougoillfollow]

if you could sit in a barrel (maybe i’ll wait)

(or, the CloudNight situationship of it all: a short companion piece to strawberry soju, courtesy of the lovely commenter who asked about it <3)

~

They wind up on the rooftop of Nemuri's apartment building, which is nice. Feels appropriate, even if it's just the two of them. Just her and Shirakumo.

Nemuri's never been all the way up here. The view of the skyline is kinda ass – too many buildings in the way – but the sky itself is not too bad at all. Pretty, even. A nice, deep shade of past-midnight blue. Starless, of course, this deep into the city, though with enough moons swimming through that vast depth to make up for it.

That last chug of Soju may have been a bad call.

Not that Nemuri's about to admit that. She is, however, about to throw up.

Or maybe not. Maybe she's good, actually. Yeah.

"I'm great," she informs Shirakumo.

"You sure are, senpai."

Nemuri giggles. That last chug of Soju was a great call. It's settled now that she's horizontal, lazing adrift on one of Shirakumo's clouds. She feels sweet with it. "This is why you're my favorite," she tells Shirakumo.

Somewhere beside her, Shirakumo laughs. "Liar," he says, light as the breeze blowing past their brick-and-concrete alcove. "Hizashi's your favorite."

He's not wrong, exactly; they're all her favorite. Yamada's just easy pickings, because he's all Yamada about everything. It's easy with Yamada.

Aizawa's easy, too, in a way. Sad, wet kitten that he is. She could just pick him up, put him in her pocket, poke at him until he bites. It's enrichment for him.

Shirakumo, though. She's not sure what to do about Shirakumo. Well. She knows what she wants to do about Shirakumo – or rather, with – and to – Shirakumo. She's just not so sure she should do it, because, you see, Shirakumo is an idiot, and too sweet by half, besides.

She's not about to say all that, though, no matter how sweet that Soju sits in her gut.

"Oh?" she says instead. "Are you jealous?"

"Not gonna lie," says Shirakumo, about to lie: "I'm a little jealous."

Nemuri snorts. "No, you're not." He wasn't jealous when she made out with Yamada right in front of his face earlier, and he's not jealous now.

"I did say 'a little.'" He laughs. A cloud materializes in the sky above his outstretched fingers; it splits into two cherubic halves, which go dancing around and around and around each other until Nemuri has to look away, or risk puking. "What can I say?” he adds. “I'm not really the jealous type."

See? An idiot.

"Everyone's the jealous type," Nemuri informs him, as if he needs it. "That's how people work." Even repressed little weirdos like Aizawa, and oblivious fools like Yamada. Those two deserve each other, really. Good for them.

"Does that mean you're the jealous type?" Shirakumo says. He's teasing, but the joke's on him.

"Oh, yeah," Nemuri returns easily, "I'm a monster."

Shirakumo splutters; his two waltzing clouds burst apart into the atmosphere. "No, you're not!" he laughs, aghast.

She turns on her side to look at him, and notices, for the first time, that they're sharing the same cloud, and are so close she can't even look him in the eye properly. She looks at his nose, instead, and at that stupid little bandage he always has plastered on the bridge of it, and she reaches out and pinches it, lightly, between a thumb and a forefinger. "I'm the most toxic bitch in town, honey."

"You know what, senpai?" he says, and he gets up on an elbow, and he looks at her with those eyes of his – bluer and clearer than any morning she's ever known. "I don't believe that."

"Well, that's because you're an idiot," she coos, and pinches his cheek. Then she turns her back to him, leans over the side of their cloud, and hurls. The Soju is nowhere near as sweet coming out as it was going in.

[miintsprigz]

I decided to liveblog my thoughts on the new amazing digital circus episode!

Another long post incoming…

But uh SPOILERS!!!

•Oh this is a nightmare…just based on the weird movements…

•That’s such a terrifying nightmare legitimately. I know the “I don’t wanna play with you anymore” jokes will abound but…imagine if she DOES actually abstract at some point. And this was foreshadowing. Also, the fact that she’s so terrified of being forgotten… Oh honey… we could never forget you!

•I don’t ship them (PLEASE DONT KILL ME) but Ragatha and Pomni are so sweet. But goshdangit Ragatha your fEELINGS MATTER STOP FAWNING.

•THE GIANT BUBBLE BLEEP AHAHA

•”Zooby” PFFT.

•LARPING. SO POMNI’S CANONICALLY ONE OF US HUH, GIANT DWEEB (affectionately)

•Idk why but I really like that gummy elephant. It’s so cute!

•”They’ve even got little candy bugs here!” D’AWW.

•So…Caine’s God, huh.

•”I’m not a child you don’t have to hype me up.” Fair point. Still get icked out by r34 tho.

•”I call shotgun!” Ok I admit he’s fun at times.

•PLEASE LET GANGLE HAVE ONE NICE THING I BEG OF YOU

•The graphics did get a serious upgrade. I love it.

•Huh, so the AI have personalities even when they aren’t being watched, if the gummy bandits are AI.

•Ok never mind Jax is a pain again.

•YEAH YOU CUSS HIM OUT POMNI!

•Aw well at least Kinger is trying to help.

•”Now I have no bridge!” EAT IT RABBIT

•Gosh this really is so silly I like it.

•Jax makes me hate him more almost every time he opens his mouth.

•DID HE JUST SHOVE RAGATHA IN THE FACE?! AND BLACKMAIL POOR GANGLE?!

•Sorry I’ll stop talking about Jax, I just really don’t like him (love him as a character, pisses me off as a person).

•OH GOSH NOT THE GLITCHING VEHICLE

•Oh no that poor gummy dude! I love his Aussie accent too (I think he’s an Aussie)

•OH SHOOT HE GLITCHED THROUGH THOSE ARE MODELS!

•Yeah that must be unnerving. Poor guy.

•There’s our girl!

•”Under the map” makes me think she designed it. “What are you on about?” Makes me think he IS an AI. But he’s becoming self aware. “Where’s mum…” oh no this poor guy…

•Aw Pomni is being nice to him.

•Well I love this fella already. …but I already know…things…hhhhhhhhhh.

•Hah, Willy Wonks reference.

•OH SHOOT ITS A RAGGEDY ANN MOVIE REFERENCE. Fudge is silly, I kinda love him. But also YIKES HE ATE PEOPLE.

•”Is it really murder if it’s delicious?” FFFFFFF

•I STILL HATE JAX BY THE WAY, please don’t kill me for that. Really only cares about himself, I so badly want to see him get his just desserts. I’m sorry if you love him, I love to hate him, I promise it’s nothing personal

•Poor gummy havin a crisis. I wanna hug him.

•See Pomni is actually nice. Imo anyway. She wants to help she’s just nervous. Attagirl, Pomni. You’re trying your best.

•I’m seeing the I Have No Mouth references. And AW she’s inviting him to come with!!! Good lass.

•POMNI DEVELOPMENT!!! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!! BEST GIRL!!!

•Gummigoo, good lad good lad

•Her knowledge on the programming. Her KNOWLEDGE. EEEEE.

•AWWW THEIR LITTLE SMILES

•This is an oddly pretty landscape here, with the teapots.

•Kinger with a bucket on his head HAHAHA

•”I don’t think she really likes me that much.” Honey if only you saw what ONE EPISODE spawned in regards to art of you two.

•KINGER IS THE TEAM DAD. I REPEAT, KINGER IS THE TEAM DAD! “I remember when you were new here too…” And just like that, he lost it.

•OWCH FUDGE GOT BONKED.

•PFFT ya know as a mildly emetophobic person, I normally hate vomit jokes, but these are kind of funny.

•”Good to see you lads.” AWWW.

•Aw the duplicate worked out.

•”I’m so unbelievably disappointed right now” GOOD, COPE SEETHE MALD

•Pomni is genuinely a sweetie. We can see it now. I love that.

•Also the Princess is lovely, I adore her, hope we see her again.

•Oh shoot. Big boom. OH NO FUDGE.

•NO!!!! GUMMIGOOOOOO!!!! I knew it was coming but STILL.

•It’s so sad that she got all this development and now it seems like she’s back at stage one

•Could gummi have been human after all? Is that why Caine looked horrified???

•BRING HIM BACK PLEASE!!!!

•Awww Zooble’s little comfort.

•Oh shoot, funeral for Kaufmo…that’s so sad… aw… that’s good though. It’s how they keep their humanity.

•LEMME HUG THEM PLEASE!!! AW RAGATHA HONEY ITS OK

•AWWW GANGLE’S DRAWING!! THEY WERE BUDDIES… AAAA

•Even Zooble seems sad. Zooble’s nice deep down too I think, they’re just apathetic. And who can really blame them? When you’re stuck in a digital reality, completely disconnected from your own humanity, sometimes that’s how you cope.

•Notice the only one NOT MOURNING is FRIGGIN JAX. What a dingus.

•I really love seeing a resolution to Pomni’s nightmare, where she realizes that people would miss her, and that they would mourn her if she was gone. I think that’s an important thing for her to realize. I guess she isn’t back at stage one after all.

•I WANT A PLUSHIIIIIIE

•But yeah, this episode was absolutely amazing, it made me feel so many emotions, and I can’t wait to obsess over the TV tropes page with all of its new details!

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

kinda annoying tbh that theres not a lot that people do to show good sides of wave and storms relationship unless they're trying to ship them. got any headcanons or tidbits about how those two interact with eachother?

i have SO MANY, but i’ll list some of the more compelling ones :3 i love these too in like a “we’re so different on an ideological level, but we both love jet SO MUCH so we have to work together” notion.

- since storm is gifted in the culinary arts, he knows wave’s weakness: cacio e pepe. ONLY WHEN HE MAKES IT THOUGH. so if he ever needs to bribe her or get her to not have a stick up her ass, he says he’ll make it and she begrudgingly cooperates.

- similarly, when wave goes hermitmode in her workshop, no matter how insane she is, he will always bring her a bowl of fresh fruit. she has to eat it

- there’s a common misconception that storm is stupid, and an even futher misconception that he’s the immature one. wave can actually be extremely petty and uncooperative at times, but storm makes a point of bridging their differences. he’s patient and tries to understand her as best he can when they’re dealing with a situation and wave has gotten better with her patience

- they are both into music from completely different angles. wave is an “i learned on my dad’s kit” percussionist who would play along to records and can’t read sheetmusic well, whiplash style. storm is a composer who score studies and conducts, spending so much of his time perfecting and studying. this is one of those scenarios where wave actually has to listen to storm if she’s filling in on kit for his ensemble. yeah, percussionists are usually the timekeepers, but with a conductor the hierarchy gains another level. wave does get frustrated, but moreso with herself as she tries to play how he needs her to play

- in my lore, wave went rogue from the rogues for a few years, unbeknownst to jet. she was present during the day, but would sneak out at night for some diabolical shit and it was always storm waiting up for her with tea to make sure she came back. this is actually why in interpret her to be so jaded when it comes to storm: a sense of guilt or embarrassment. storm worrying over her makes her react negatively as it feels belittling, and reminds her that what she was doing was bad. he is a constant reminder of everything she once was, stuff she tries to forget, and she HATES how he looks at her sometimes because he remembers and he worries about her and a part of her doesn’t feel like she deserves it. sorry, did i say these would be fun? NO! SUFFERING!

- storm is very good at reading wave to filth, but he does it wholesomely and casually, and she can’t even be mad. example:

wave: i have to fix the transmission on my jetta

storm: right, because instead of staying in the passing lane, you weave in and out of traffic to save yourself 0 minutee in travel time instead of being patient and letting people merge

wave: … (“: hah. well, i mean…

storm: mhm. :”)

another example, for shits and giggles:

like, come on! storm is less aggressive than schlatt, but you can’t tell me they don’t go at it like this because they totally do.

- FINAL ONE TO MAKE THIS A TRAUMA SANDWICH THAT ENDS NICELY: storm’s birthday is october 19th, whereas wave’s is november 11th. they’re hardly a year apart in age yet there’s a boomer esque joke of storm being soooo much older than her and she needs to respect her elders. it’s either that storm is too old to get something, or wave is too young to remember the good old days. no one else finds this funny or even gets the joke, so it’s a bit they share sarcastically with one another. on that note, i think it’s pretty clear they’re always sarcastically egging each other on, but no one else picks up on it lmao

[toastytrusty]

thinking endlessly about how romans main relationships outside of the family in later seasons are lukas and mencken, and how their dynamics with rome foil each other both narratively and in-universe. lukas represents them selling waystar, represents emotional vulnerability, represents freedom. mencken, on the other hand, represents them keeping the company, represents the toxic façade of who you Need to be, represents remaining trapped. the way romes emotions fuel the contrasting dynamics between them is endlessly fascinating

lukas, upon his second time meeting rome, immediately continuously attempts to talk abt deep kinda personal/emotional stuff, which rome shut down because he's afraid of self expression, even though deep down he craves connection. this probably scares him, so, especially after logan's death and lukas' reaction to it (on one hand being a dick and not pushing back the meeting, on the other hand trying in his own autistic way to connect and empathize with their loss, as well as being real about how awful logan was), roman distances himself. he feels pushed to the edge of his sanity and reverts to what comes most naturally to him, you guessed it, eeeemotion. he freaks out at lukas on the cliff, in his head burning any bridge built between them, which tbf he pretty much does. but to lukas, this is almost like a win for him. he's been trying to encourage roman to open up to him since they met, and he finally did! so the $5 price bump is almost like a congratualtions or a reward, as well as a spiteful fuck you. narratively it takes them one step closer to selling the company, roman's emotion being what puts him there, and in this case it's being appreciated. really, rome wants out of the company; he wants to sell and he wants to be free of it and all the pressure and expectation that comes with it.

whereas mencken was always very business-focused with roman; joking and laughing in a detached, not very real way. his focus was always succeeding and going far and not really caring how he got there, and i think that's part of why roman liked him. there was no expectation to be genuine or actually connect; he could just put on his brave face and do what they felt needed to be done. when he pushed lukas away because things got too real, he continued seeking out mencken because mencken was easy to appeal to in that way he so often does; changing himself to suit there needs. he puts mencken over everything else that mattered in his life (relationships with his family members mainly he doesn't gaf about The Economy) because he didn't have to be real with mencken. it was all just the blind pursuit for power he didn't really want and a security he felt more threatened by than anything, because he got too far in and set his sights on something (or more accurately kendall set his sights on something, and who was rome to protest?) and had to acheive it. so when the façade breaks, and mencken sees him for the first time not as the charming, witty, businessman, but as the damaged person who just wasn't built for the world, he walks away, no longer looking to protect waystar, or roman. love and sensitivity and emotion are all weaknesses to mencken, weakness he had previously not seen in roman, but now that he had it was too late. rome couldn't pretend forever and mencken bailed, handing waystar (and roman!! becase their ties to waystar are through roman!!) back to lukas and the gojo deal on a silver platter.

this inadvertantly pushes roman back towards freedom, and, in a way, back towards lukas. he told mr emotions to fuck off and ran away to be his self absorbed emotionless husk with someone who wanted nothing more from him, but that didn't work out too well. he can't stay in the cage that is waystar, he can't spend all of his time being someone he's not; it's exhausting. lukas represents his ability to acheive freedom from the toxic environment of waystar, as well as the fact that he will eventually have to confront reality, and mencken represents his unhealthy, and ultimately doomed to fail, coping mechanisms and avoidance behavior. when he tries to twist his perspective of the people around him to make them seem like good people (logan, MENCKEN), lukas shuts it down (at least with logan; i don't think the two of them ever talk abt mencken) and makes rome confront the fact that they aren't, and when rome is so deep into being someone he isn't, lukas encourages him to be himself, whereas mencken condemns him for it

[book-of-baba-fett]

New tag game. Pick 5 songs you think would be used for fancam videos if your OC was canon and tag 5 people

@purgetrooperfox tagged me in this like months ago but I kept remembering it and thinking “oh I want to do that” but I didn’t realize it was months ago until I just looked for it 😂

1. Boss Bitch - Doja Cat

* This one is the ideal action fan cam. it’s one of my favorite songs to hype myself up on my gym playlist, and I feel like this would be used for action scenes with Talia, especially the bounty hunter chase scene from chapter 5 where she’s fighting in her going out dress.

2. I am not a woman, I’m a God - Halsey

* I could go on for hours about how criminally underrated If I Can’t Have Love, I Want Power is as an album, tbh so many of these songs were background writing/brainstorming music because they’re so well written and the sound is so good, if you haven’t listened I totally recommend. This song in particular is amazing, and I feel like it would be great for those kinda female rage edits, or angsty ones showing off Talia’s power in juxtaposition with how she’s feeling left out of the Order.

3. Unknown Soldier - Breaking Benjamin

* Taking a break from Talia to show Storm a little love, and this is a bit of a cop out because i’ve talked about this song in general for the clones before but I think it works very well for Storm’s character because what was all his fighting for? He was originally in the wolf pack, and only missed abregado because he was promoted to a captain and just moved to the 412th to miss the event that killed most of the men he had just served with, and he has some guilt over that. Then with the 412th, he wasn’t on the ground when Maul attacked and massacred the men, leaving Talia injured, so that’s another realm of guilt he has.

He’s the soldier that always pushes on, even when the galaxy moves on around him. I don’t know if i’ll ever get to write much of his and Rhys’s story, but he has a chance for life outside the army but it’s complicated and he’s the type of noble man that couldn’t leave his brothers behind even if his own happiness is lost. and he does make it to the end of the war, but for those that read IA you know that his ending is not happy, no matter that outcome of the unknown.

4. illicit affairs - taylor swift

* I know, a shocker. BUT I actually was debating for awhile if I would include a taylor song here and which one, and this did really feel like the right one because I could include why i titled the fic this, because rex and talia’s relationship doesn’t totally mirror the relationship in the song, because that definitely seems like a more unhealthy and unhappy affair. but the passion of the bridge is what spoke to me (which is why I linked a video of taylor singing the bridge on tour), and I think there is an argument to I healthy aspects of Rex and Talia’s relationship on both sides, but I think that’s due to their environment and also they’re both young people who’ve never loved before. but the bridge really speaks to the passion they feel, and would be used so much for edits particularly around the breakup chapters and flashing back to happier times.

5. Good Luck, Babe!- chappell roan

* ok I had the throw this in here because @queen--kenobi and I have tossed this around as being used as an edit for Talia and her OC Kau’ra. i have to preface this as saying both Talia and Kau’ra do love their hetero partners, BUT if they were canon you KNOW how fandom would treat them and their creators even talk about it lmaoo so you KNOW good luck babe edits of them would be all over the feed.

no pressure tags; @enigmaticexplorer @rexxdjarin @ulchabhangorm @galacticgraffiti @certified-anakinfucker @eternal-transcience @queen--kenobi

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - September 17th

Happy Sunday, friends! Here’s today’s list--it’s gonna be kinda light over the next week or two, because work is kicking my ass. Enjoy though! And be sure to leave a comment/kudos for the fic you enjoy! 

~*~ 

Transistor-Powered Teammate by veryvincible

“You know, I always thought Tony Stark would be the one to master time travel. When I first got here, I half thought he must have a time machine laying around somewhere.”

Heart’s desire. by captainstars

Neither Steve nor Tony could have reacted in time to the purple blast that exploded out from the stone, bathing both of them in the warmth of its eerie light.

“You will realize it.” The man professed, his gaze startlingly clear for someone who had been rambling until then.

“You will realize your heart’s desire.”

OR

The fuck buddies + ABO AU.

make me yours by complicationstoo 

Steve sighs, “With the way the serum made me look and the strength it gave me, I know you were expecting me to be, I don’t know, more dominant in bed, I guess. And I know it’s a fair assumption, I’m not saying it isn’t, but it’s not really true.”

Tony is grateful that Steve can’t see his face right now, because he can’t mask the utter surprise on it when it finally clicks.

“Oh,” Tony says. “Oh, that’s - oh.”

tomorrow by complicationstoo 

“She’s just a friend, you know,” Natasha says, and Steve nods. He does know, because Tony told him himself a few days ago, then again tonight when he introduced her to everyone. But his hand was on her lower back, and hers was on his arm, and they were both smiling and so clearly familiar with each other that it didn’t matter that they’ve known each other since they were kids. All Steve could see was that someone else was Tony’s date for a gala he didn’t even want to come to in the first place, making the whole night that much more miserable for it.

Foot, meet mouth by itsallAvengers

Peter finds a ring in Steve's jacket pocket.

Peter confronts Steve.

Peter discovers it is, in fact, not actually Steve's jacket.

Peter contemplates how long his dad is going to ground him when he finds out what he's just done.

Put Me Back Together by AvengersNewB

Steve holds it together to see through what needs to be done, with Tony missing in space and half of the universe snapped out of existence.

Only until Tony comes back to earth.

---

Infinity War fix-it.

A Bit Of Sweet Sugar (For The Veins) by dingadur

Steve finds a flogger in Tony's underwear drawer and promptly freaks the fuck out.

They figure it out, though.

fun & games by welcoming_disaster

In which Steve Rogers keeps making bets he's going to lose.

Captain Planet by tsukinofaerii 

After the Red Skull incident, Steve needs to get away from things for a while. Tony, being the caring and considerate person he is, makes arrangements. But the Steve that comes back might be a little more than the world can handle.

buy the brooklyn bridge by plingo_kat

It’s a whole new world, and Steve finds himself fitting in pretty well. Especially with Tony Stark as a guide.

My Heart Would Benefit From a Little Tenderness From Time to Time by SuperstringSymphony 

“Come with me.” Tony licks his lips, blue eyes lifting to meet Steve's. “We've both had a long week, I thought you might like to relax.” Tony's gaze darts from side to side. Steve has noticed since they started this that Tony only ever truly looks nervous when he's talking to him. “The car is around the front, what do you say, weekend getaway?” Tony smiles, stroking a hand down his back with a featherlight touch. Steve just barely represses a shiver, eyeing Tony for a moment. With other people he's always a little shuttered. Here though, with Steve, his expression is unguarded, eyes bright with hope. He looks a little strained though, as if the week has taken its toll on him as well.

When I think about you by sirona 

Five times someone saw Steve sass the hell out of Tony and one time Tony finally bought a clue. Also known as the story of Captain Sasspants more than handling his own with Tony Stark at his most devious.

Two Out of Three (Ain't Bad) by plingo_kat

It blindsides him one morning in the middle of his customary third cup of coffee; Steve walks through the door in loose cotton pants, shirt pulled up to wipe the sweat off his face from his usual morning workout, and Tony thinks: adorable.

Not a Breakup by Annie D (scaramouche)

Tony knew it was a bad idea to start sleeping with Steve. It could mess up team dynamics, make things even more awkward between them in the future, or just plain get in the way of their trying to save the world. Tony foresaw all of the above but not the advent of feelings, and at the most inopportune moment.

For a Certain Definition of Happiness by Neverever

Steve Rogers should be happy - he has a job leading the new team of Avengers, friends, and a steady girlfriend. He works well with Tony Stark, who has retired as Iron Man and provides financial backing and technical support for the team. Steve's life becomes complicated when the Avengers encounter a mysterious supervillain crimewave, Helmut Zemo wants to legislate the Avengers out of existence, and his relationship with Sharon begins to fall apart. Then, after the death of a close friend, Steve begins to question if he is truly happy.

And, worse, why can't he get Tony off his mind?

Ares & Vulcan by Captain_Panda

"I am the god of war.  And I’m here to fight the mad Titan Thanos."

Tony Stark dies. Steve Rogers endeavors to fix that. In the process, he transcends.

An Endgame Greek god fusion. Because time travel.

[comicbookgirl2]

HOT TAKE: I do sorta like this show BUT

I feel like it wastes a ton of potential?

The Chaos Bots should be a more consistent/bigger threat. But it feels like this show borrows notes from SVFTOE where it says "focus more on the teen/family drama than the ACTUAL looming threat."

The whole premise with the future could've been a bit more explored as well- because the future solely hinges on one person. ((I feel like this is kinda iffy but whatever)). Which is fine I guess- it's not like they can reveal what happens to everyone because of space/time continuum or whatever- ((that too is also a problem in and of itself when it comes to me caring about the characters, because it makes them feel like they don't matter in the long run??? None of them are Hailey's equals either? But it might just be a me thing)) but what about things like canon events? I'm not saying "THE SHOW HAS TO HAVE DARK LORE LIKE OWL HOUSE AND GRAVITY FALLS DID" but I honestly think it sorta needed a stronger hook if the stakes are going to be that HIGH. ((I do find it funny how it does lack that sort of depth of lore when you consider that the consequences of Hailey failing is the LITERAL apocalypse))

I feel like the whole 'kiss-scott' thing is sorta drawn out and boring. Hailey kinda feels like a flat character and I wish they'd gone for a more underdog-esque angle with her. She honestly feels like she's good at everything- and the universe just sorta helps her out (she's incredibly lucky, not lazy) so it sorta kills the tension? Nothing about her character indicates that she'd be a MASTER inventor who'd stop climate change one day. Sure she's creative and has a get-it-done sorta attitude, but until this list popped up in her life she never shows any deep interest in fixing the environment or wanting to become an engineer.

I feel like she should've been more like Lunella from Moongirl. Lunella is a brilliant inventor- but not very athletic (she struggles with gym class) so how does she compensate for this? Simple. She uses her weapons/gadgetry to bridge the gap. But even then I'd argue that Lunella fumbles/struggles more to get things done than Hailey does. ((But then again the Moongirl show doesn't have a strict framework like Hailey's show does-so it can get away with more but that's a talk for another time). They try to sell you a girl who's risk-aversed and introverted, but Hailey doesn't come off as either of those things to me. (But that just might be me)

Honestly I feel like the show should've started out being a bookworm/loner. She's not athletic in the slightest and in fact fails at a lot of things. She doesn't have scott by her side (I'll get into this later) so when the list comes to her- she's forced to believe in herself and for the good of the world interact/make friends with people she never thought she could. Maybe she even struggles with perfectionism/the fear of failure as well.

Scott's character is also super wasted too- I don't have a problem with dumb/friendly himbo characters that can't read the room- but it feels like he could've been a bit more than that??? Especially his unbalanced dynamic with Hailey? His character is sorta held back by all the re-occuring side characters if you think about it. And their chemistry is super limited. She's super smart/talented, and he's just well...Scott. He does and say stupid stuff that either annoys her or she just rolls with it for the sake of the joke.

((Personally I would've started off the show with them not being friends/maybe even frenemies and then just have them reluctantly work together until they fall for each other)) He can't be the rival who challenges her because that's AC's job (who's a joke of a character too btw) he can't be the super social one who's the popular kid who makes Hailey feel uncomfortable/reluctant to work with because that's Christine (who's also a reoccurring side character as well). He can't be the super snarky character who despite being just as smart/more responsible than her constantly butts heads with her over completing the list (because that's Beta's role- but I give Beta a pass because he sorta carries this show for me). But if he'd had any of those traits- being a rival, or a skill that he'd consistently be better at so he'd carry the team more- part of me feels like it'd have given their dynamic better footing.

Which speaking of-

Like this may be another hot take- but Hailey/Scott's dynamic feels unbalanced and lacks a lot of chemistry to me. I just can NOT ship them romantically, and ironically the more the show hints/tells me it's endgame- the less I feel inclined to ship it. I really think that if the list didn't outright imply it and the fate of the world didn't depend on it- these two wouldn't be a thing.

People say not every girl/guy has to end up together- and I do agree. But if the show really wanted to hit shipping gold, I think it should've explored it's options better.

[berrymoos]

Hiii!!! It's me again!!! Could I possibly request the Moonknight boys again, this time with these emojis from the game??? 🍼, 🎨, ✨ - Sorry if it's too much!!! 😅

Hope you're having an amazing day/evening/night!!! (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)!!!

HELLOOO MY DEAREST ASH (≡^∇^≡) !! this is not too much at all, dw!! ty for the ask, i hope you're havin an awesome time too!!! <33

🐠 — steven grant!

🍼. what's their favorite age regression accessory / gear?

hm ... probably his winnie the pooh stuffie? he accidentally ordered a pack of characters instead of just winnie, so the others have their own pooh character stuffies, too (marc has eeyore, jake has tigger, & layla has piglet)! not only is his winnie stuffie very very cuddly, it also reminds him of the little family he has now 🥹

🎨. what does their ideal nursery / playroom look like?

he's gotta have some egyptian-themed trinkets and bookshelf filled with books of his interests (& some others that just seem fun)! also puzzles!! he likes working his brain & sometimes, he sets his stuffies next to him & "teaches" them how to do them!!

✨. how are they different when they regress?

he's actually more talkative when small! he's always asking questions, rambling about the things he finds interesting, mumbling under his breath while he does things, etc... for steven, regression means he doesn't have to worry about saying the wrong things or upsetting anybody; at those points, he's just a little guy (*＾＾*)//

🌙 — marc spector!

🍼. what's their favorite age regression accessory / gear?

... his stuffed bunny KSHAKDNWK ,, but is that even a surprise tho? miffy & marc are always together no matter what; miffy is practically his bestest friend ever (just underneath stevie but shhh 🫣)!!

🎨. what does their ideal nursery / playroom look like?

honestly? anything cozy & dark blue works wonders for him. marc is a simplistic little guy, so he doesn't need nor desire a lot of stuff! just having his stuffies & his family is more than okay for him <33

✨. how are they different when they regress?

ohhh this sweet sweet boy 🥹 – marc gets mumbly, cuddly, & a tons more open abt his feelings. his emotions come out a lot easier bc he feels safe to do so, safer than he's ever felt in ... well, a while

🐕 — jake lockely!

🍼. what's their favorite age regression accessory / gear?

two items, but his hat & his building blocks!! his hat offers a place for him to hide behind when he gets overwhelmed or shy about something, while his blocks are his favorite toys to build, knock over, & rebuild! also, paired with steven's imagination, those two can do so much more than just build & knock over – they can have a whole storyline revolving around a little block bridge & a few stuffies!!

🎨. what does their ideal nursery / playroom look like?

i rllllly think jake is bigger on toys than stuffies (not to say he doesn't have a few of his own, like his tigger stuffie & mocha the cow), so his playroom would be filled with blocks, legos, cars, little action figures ... all of that stuff!! <3

✨. how are they different when they regress?

he indulges a lot more in sweet treats n stuff – jake most deff has a sweet tooth, but being khonshu's avatar kinda prevents him from allowing himself to enjoy them as much as he wants! the boys + layla like to keep baggies of candy & cookies around so jake can have something to nibble on when he's small & craving sweets *´ㅅ`)ﾞ♥

[peanutbutterjelly-pie]

Stupid

Rating: Gen Word Count: 4k

Since he forgot his phone at work Dean borrows Charlie's cell to send Cas a quick message. What follows turns his world upside down. (In which Cas thinks he's talking with Charlie and reveals way more about his true feelings than Dean is able to handle.)

[ao3]

Dean loves Fridays.

For one, his work day already ends around 2 PM. Granted, Dean adores his job and actually walks into his office with a big smile on his face most of the time. Which is kinda ironic since he's never in his wildest dream would've ever pictured himself using his engineering degree to design new airplanes and enjoying every second of it, not with him still being fiercely against flying as a concept in on itself and not keen at all on putting any of his designs to the test for real (FUCK NO!!). It's quite a running joke in the office, of course, and Dean laughs along to his colleagues teasing him about it, but at the same time he's dead serious about it.

So yes, creating new and improved airplanes? Dean is so down for this. Flying those things afterwards? NO WAY IN FREAKING HELL!!!

Either way, his Fridays at work are short and instead of heading back home into his cozy, little apartment he always throws himself into his beloved Impala and drives into the complete opposite direction.

To Charlie's place.

They had met in college about ten years ago and more or less bonded right away over their love for Star Trek. Soon enough they had found even more things in common and before Dean even knew it he traveled to LARP events, called himself Charlie's handmaiden, and started to see her as the sister he never really wanted, but somehow didn't mind having anyway.

Them meeting up every Friday for video games and movie marathons is a thing that began basically since Dean's been working at his current job straight out of college.

Dean's always eager to make time for friends and family, even with a full-time job, so he made this a tradition and refused to budge on the matter. Thankfully Charlie has been equally enthusiastic and as a freelancer who earns a shit ton of money by helping companies with their IT stuff or whatever (Dean is still not really sure what she even does), she is able to fill her schedule the way she likes it.

She has been keeping her Fridays free ever since.

Today is not any different.

Dean drove straight to her after work and has been at her place ever since. They've been watching a couple of episodes of Firefly while eating unhealthy snacks before switching over to video games. Dean hadn't had any consoles growing up, so it took him a while to get the hang of it when Charlie introduced him to it, but eventually he became quite good. At least good enough to beat Charlie's ass from time to time.

It's easy fun with lots of interactions and yelling and whooping and both Dean and Charlie have a tendency to completely forget the outside world when they're sucked into a specific game.

This time they're both so engrossed with chasing their Super Mario characters over some rainbow bridges in their colorful race cars that the hours pass by unnoticed.

When Dean eventually, after a devastating loss which makes him groan unattractively, glimpses at the surprisingly analog clock at the wall he ends up flinching in surprise at the lateness of the evening.

“Shit!” he exclaims, looking at the small hand already having passed the seven. “Why is it so late already?”

Charlie looks up as well and seems equally astonished by the passage of time. “Huh, I didn't notice.”

Dean grumbles and quickly leans back to fish his phone out of his pocket – only to discover that there is nothing to be found.

He blinks in confusion for a few seconds before realization hits him and he moans once again. “Oh fuck, I left my phone in the office!”

He recalls vividly how it had been lying on his table and he urged himself over and over to pack it before leaving. He basically had been reaching for it already. And then one of the other engineers showed up with an important issue and Dean found himself so distracted by it all that anything else slipped his mind. By the end of it he was so eager to call it a day and rush over to Charlie's place that he just grabbed his jacket and headed out of there before anyone else might have intercepted him with yet another problem.

“Sucks to be you,” Charlie chuckles while Dean merely rolls his eyes and wonders whether he should ride back to the office for his phone either today or at least tomorrow by the latest or whether he should just leave it there for the whole weekend.

Either way, that doesn't change the fact right now that it's entirely too late already.

“I need to call Cas,” Dean says, gritting his teeth.

Because see, this is yet another reason why he loves Fridays so much: Cas.

Best friends since Dean moved with his family into the house across from Cas' about twenty years ago they always made sure to stay in each other's lives. Granted, from the outside they look like they have nothing much in common and if Dean is being honest with himself he's not sure they would've even been on one another's' radars at all if it wouldn't have been for that one boring summer when Dean had been new in town at fourteen years old and didn't know a soul around and eventually found himself fixating on the blue-eyed neighbor since there was literally nobody else his age around to hang out with.

And yeah, Dean questioned his choice the first few weeks, Cas so odd and awkward and like no one Dean has ever met before, he certainly had no clue how to deal with that. But somehow Cas wormed himself into Dean's heart with his dorky weirdness and in the grand scheme of things Dean couldn't be happier about it.

So they stayed close, even when they eventually went to different colleges so far away from each other that they merely managed to see one another once or twice a year. In the end, though, they both came back into their hometowns and settled down there, Dean with his engineering job and neat loft apartment and Cas with his teaching position at the local university and him inheriting his old childhood home after his parents decided to move into a warmer climate.

Dean had been over the moon seeing them both back at the same location and he was determined from the start to meet up as often as possible, despite their time-demanding jobs. So of course after Fridays became a thing with Charlie, Dean couldn't help but incorporate Cas into that as well. Because why not make that day absolutely perfect, right?

And since his mom always invites her sons to brunch Saturday mornings and Cas technically lives right across from her, it became a tradition for Dean to crash at Cas' place and then on the next day go to his mom's, usually with Cas in tow because at this point in her life Mary considers him her third kid anyway.

So yeah, it's a date every single Friday for many years now.

And right now Dean is on the brink of being too late and the last thing he wants is for Cas to worry about his whereabouts.

“Can I borrow your phone?” Dean asks Charlie. “I need to call Cas.”

Charlie hands him her cell without a moment of hesitation and says, “Better send him a text. He might still be on his way back home.”

Right.

Contrary to Dean and Charlie, Cas always uses his Friday afternoons to catch up on his work. “To not be greeted by a mountain of paperwork first thing Monday morning, Dean,” Cas is never shy to explain.

Dean can't help a little smile as he hears Cas' voice in his head.

He catches himself at the last second, though, before his face might get too gooey or something, and he quickly opens Cas' number, vigorously ignoring his text chain with Charlie (which doesn't seem overly excessive anyway because for some unfathomable reason those two actually enjoy talking to each other on the phone, like a pair of old people), and hurries to type his message.

< hey how's it hanging?

And then Dean accidentally hits send.

He growls in frustration. “Charlie!” he complains. “Your phone is all wrong!”

Charlie huffs. “Only because you're a dinosaur and you're only used to your ancient phone doesn't mean mine has done anything wrong ever in its life. You just have to be a little bit more delicate.”

Dean rolls his eyes, eager to give her a piece of his mind, when suddenly the phone vibrates, indicating an incoming message. Looks like Cas is already home or at least at a safe location to text back immediately.

> I know why you're texting all of a sudden. And you don't have to bother, I won't change my feelings on the matter.

Dean just has time to wrinkle his forehead in confusion when another text arrives.

> Dean doesn't need to know.

Dean's eyes widen, for a moment too stunned to do anything.

And then he instantly finds himself torn.

It's obvious Cas thinks he's talking with Charlie (and why shouldn't he? It's Charlie's number after all) and Dean should hurry to explain the situation and stop Cas before anything else might happen.

He seriously should.

But then he ends up thinking back on Cas' behavior recently. For the last few weeks he has been downright weird whenever Dean was around (weirder than usual, that is) and Dean has been wrecking his brain for a while now what the hell might have happened that made their dynamic shift in such a way. It's not glaringly obvious or anything, at least nobody from the outside has commented on it so far, but Dean certainly noticed Cas keeping his distance.

Dean has no idea whether he did something wrong or whether something just came up and he is taking the brunt of it and he has been dying to find out ever since.

And now it's apparently offered to him on a silver platter.

Still, Dean really should do the right thing …

He seriously should.

But before his conscience is able to catch up with him his fingers already start typing.

< what do u mean?

And he leaves it with that.

Dean squeezes his eyes shut, hating himself a little bit. Who even does this to a friend in the first place?

Damn.

Yeah, no, he needs to clear up the situation right here and now –

That is when another text arrives and Dean is too weak not to look at it.

> Don't play cute with me, Charlie. I have told you before, Dean doesn't need to know about my feelings for him. Things are good between us, I don't want to ruin that.

Dean blinks.

And blinks some more.

Wait, what?

WHAT?

Dean's heart stops for a couple of seconds, picks up one hell of a pace after that, only to pump the brakes yet again so hard he gets actually dizzy from it.

Because Cas … he can't mean what Dean thinks he means, right?

RIGHT?

Dean feels himself freaking out, his breathing becoming labored as his heart continues to go crazy within his chest. For a long moment up is down and down is up.

Only when Charlie nudges his shoulder, seemingly worried by the expression on Dean's features, Dean gets jolted back into reality. He startles at first, feeling like a newborn deer trying to make sense of the new environment, before he manages to catch himself somehow.

And he doesn't wait around to shove the phone right into Charlie's face and exclaim, “What the hell is that?”

Charlie is, of course, highly confused by Dean's question and just frowns at him.

So Dean grits his teeth and gestures at the text conversation with Cas, urging her to read it. Which she dutifully does the next second.

And then her eyes widen as she mutters underneath her breath, “Shit.”

Dean huffs. “What the fuck is he talking about, Charlie?”

He doesn't expect a straight answer right away.

Damn, he doesn't even expect any kind of answer at all.

So he leans back and watches as Charlie starts to splutter and flail her arms around in every single direction and make the most unintelligible noises not even the most experienced linguist would have been able to decipher. She is clearly caught off guard in the most major manner and can't for the hell of it find a graceful way out of it. At least not quick enough to not be absolutely pathetic.

“Charlie,” Dean eventually cuts into her incoherent rambling, not in the mood to be witness to this for the rest of the night. “Just get a grip and tell me the truth!”

Charlie shakes her head and nods at the same time. So fiercely, in fact, that Dean for a moment gets actually worried that her neck would break in half by the sheer force of it.

“It's – um, it's nothing, man,” she says in the end, way over the top. “Just … uuuuuhhhhh, just some inside joke Cas and I have …”

Dean rolls his eyes at that. “Right,” he replies, the opposite of convinced. “So when Cas says he's got feelings for me …”

Charlie makes a noise that is probably supposed to be a dismissive snort. “Just – y'know – I mean – it's just …” Her gaze flickers anywhere but near Dean. “I mean, um … everyone has feelings about everyone, right? … I mean, I totally have all the platonic feelings for you, for example, you know? …”

Dean arches his brows skeptically. “So you're saying Cas has platonic feelings for me?”

Charlie perks up at those words. “Yes!” she agrees, far too enthusiastically for it to be convincing in the least. “Yes, that's what I'm saying!”

Dean scoffs. “And why would he make a big state secret out of it?”

Charlie pulls a face. “I mean, you know how he is … he is weird sometimes …”

Dean groans before pushing himself to his feet, not eager to listen to any more of her excuses. “I've gotta go talk to Cas!”

He hears Charlie voice some sort of protest, but Dean just grabs his jacket and is out of the door before she's able to stop him.

---

It takes about fifteen minutes to get to Cas' place.

And Dean's head is spinning so hard the whole drive there he is actually surprised that he doesn't end up in a ditch somewhere.

But what is he supposed to think after that text message?

Yeah, Dean highly doubts Cas would be so cagey about platonic feelings of all things, but at the same time Dean can't allow himself to imagine the alternative.

Because that would break him.

Because Cas actually admitting to having Feelings for Dean, the capital letter kind, sounds like so fucking much.

After all it would mean …

It would mean that Dean has been pining in secret for ages even though his feelings haven been reciprocated the whole freaking time?

Yeah, Dean can't even remember anymore when it started. It's probably been a gradual process that began a long time ago. Dean dated people and it was always okay, you know, but it wasn't it. It never felt like all those love songs made him believe it would be. At some point he even assumed that it just was something that didn't really exist. That people merely found other people they were compatible with and that was all the magic out there.

It only made sense all of a sudden when he admitted to himself about a year ago that he was head-over-heels for Cas.

There was no specific event or anything, but around that time it had been half an eternity that Dean had so much as a date with another person because nobody seemed to light even the tiniest spark within him. It only had gotten harder and harder, so eventually Dean just stopped looking.

And then he was sitting on the couch with Cas and Cas was arguing with the History Channel about something and Dean just watched him with a besotted smile on his face and thought, I want this for the rest of my life.

What followed was many weeks and months of doubt and uncertainty, but when he ultimately took the final step and was honest with himself it was suddenly easy enough to see that Cas has been it for a very long while for Dean.

But at the same time Dean was afraid to say something. Cas has never been much for dating and romance and his best friend out of the blue confessing his love might have freaked him out big time. Dean always pictured Cas withdrawing more and more until one day they wouldn't have been in each other's lives anymore.

And that – that would have been absolutely devastating.

So Dean kept his mouth shut and instead enjoyed all the things they had. While pushing thoughts of maybe scooting a bit closer and holding Cas' hand or even kissing him out of his mind.

Dean learned to live with it.

But now?

If this is really true …

If Cas feels the same way and he's just been as scared to ruin their friendship as Dean was …

Dean isn't sure he knows how to handle the possibility.

---

Dean senses both dread and elation when he parks Baby on his usual spot right behind Cas' ugly pimp mobile and he takes a minute or two of deeply inhaling and exhaling before he's got the courage to step outside and walk up to the front door.

Where Cas apparently has already been waiting as he swings the door open as Dean is just lifting his arm to knock.

As always he is stupidly gorgeous, with his piercing blue eyes, his unruly hair, and his comfy sweatpants which have become a staple for their Friday nights together.

Next to all that, however, Cas also looks mad as hell.

“How dare you pretend to be someone else to lure information out of me?” he growls so deeply a shiver runs down Dean's spine and it's only partially out of fear. “What were you even thinking?”

Looks like Charlie didn't wait around to call Cas and give him a heads-up about the situation.

Figures.

Dean just scoffs into Cas' face and pushes past him into the house. Cas makes a disgruntled noise at his friend's behavior, but closes the door behind them, obviously not eager for the whole neighborhood to be witness to this.

“You have no right to be pissed at me!” Dean hisses back the second the door is shut and sealed.

Cas seems far from impressed when faced with such logic. “You are the one who betrayed my trust!”

“I didn't betray anything!” Dean is quick to make himself clear. “I just forgot my phone at the office and borrowed Charlie's to tell you I'd be late. And 'coz I'm not used to her super modern thingy I accidentally sent you a text before I could say it's me. Easy as that.”

Cas raises his brows. “You could have clarified yourself simple enough the second time.”

Dean chews on his bottom lip, his emotions spilling all over the place as he tries to stare Cas down and at the same time not get lost in his eyes. Because he has a tendency to do just that. Since basically forever.

“I could have,” Dean concedes since Cas did make a good point. “But I didn't.”

“So why –?”

“'Coz you've been weird lately,” Dean cuts in harshly. “You've been fucking avoiding me and that's certainly a skill considering we were always in the same room for that. You don't sit with me on the couch anymore, you flinch whenever I touch you …” Dean sighs. “Fuck, I was wondering the whole time what I did wrong.”

“You did nothing wrong,” Cas is quick to come to his defense. Only to add a moment later, “Well, apart from right now where you pretended to be Charlie –”

Dean waves him off. “Yeah, so? I was desperate for some info, sue me.”

“I don't think suing you over this would have much standing in court –”

“Oh jeez, man!” Dean interrupts once more. “See, you're doing it again. Avoiding the subject of us while being in the same room. Can you really blame me for grasping at straws at this point?”

Cas falls silent after that, Dean's question clearly hitting a nerve.

“I'm just …” Dean shakes his head in exasperation. “I just wanted some friggin' answers, that's all.”

Cas pinches his face as he slowly studies Dean and takes his time wrapping his head around the whole mess.

In the end he just straightens his back and says, “Fine.”

Dean assesses the guy warily. “Fine?”

“Yes, fine,” Cas states. Without looking anywhere but Dean's eyes. “Let's forget about it and watch one of your cowboy movies –”

Dean's blood starts to boil again.

“I don't wanna watch a cowboy movie!” he snaps, barely believing such words are actually leaving his mouth. “I wanna talk about this!”

Cas looks at him as though he seriously considers that Dean has been swapped by a clone.

“You?” he asks incredulously. “Want to talk?”

Dean rolls his eyes extra hard. “I talk about stuff,” he grumbles. “Only because I choose when and where doesn't mean I'm a repressed idiot –”

“I didn't say that!” Cas leaps in to make himself clear. “I would never say that.”

Dean knows that Cas never would.

And that's one of many reasons why he is one of Dean's favorite persons on the whole planet.

“I'm just …” Dean sighs, suddenly feeling so vulnerable and raw he has no clue what to do with it. “What does feelings mean, Cas?”

Cas' mouth snaps shut immediately.

It's obvious he's not keen on pouring out his soul just yet.

Dean rubs the palm of his hand. over his mouth. “Dude, if you're seriously worried that what you're going to say might ruin anything, it won't!”

Cas shoots him a disbelieving glance, not buying it at all.

“I'm serious!” Dean insists. “Nothing can ruin our friendship!”

Cas lets out a hollow laugh and it actually sounds so awful that Dean wants to grab it out of thin air and punch it in the face.

“Of course,” Cas says sarcastically. “What if I told you I'm a serial killer who has murdered twenty-seven people?”

Dean squints his eyes.

“That's an oddly specific number,” he can't help but point out. “But yeah, I'd help you bury the freaking bodies.”

Cas shakes his head. “Dean …”

“I would,” Dean insists. “I mean, yeah, sure, I probably also would put you under strict house arrest and get you the best shrink in town, but I also would be your alibi 'coz this is what friends do.”

Cas grimaces. “I don't think covering up murders is –”

“Okay, forget it!” Dean cuts in, not in the mood to drag this example along any further. “I'm just saying, you're my best friend and nothing can change that, okay?”

Cas' features soften at that.

He looks at Dean, really looks at him, what feels like the first time in forever, and there are suddenly so many emotions displayed on his face Dean has never spotted before. They seem meaningful and heavy and Dean's heart picks up its pace again at the sight of it.

Is this really it?

“Cas,” Dean whispers, his expression right now most likely equal to Cas'. “What does feelings mean?”

Cas sighs.

Shakes his head.

And then he breathes, “It means I'm stupid …”

The way he's saying it, the manner his voice trembles … this is so much more than meets the eye.

And Dean can't have him believe for even a second longer that he is the only one standing in the corner.

So he shoots back, “Well, then I'm stupid too.”

Cas frowns at first, clearly not able to comprehend it properly.

But then their eyes meet again and Dean tries to broadcast it all out there, tries to make Cas see, dammit.

Cas gasps just a moment later.

Looks like he's getting it.

“Dean …” he mutters.

And Dean could give a grand speech about how he's crazy for this dork and probably always has been, but somehow his throat feels way too tight all of sudden and he highly doubts he will get any coherent sentences out of there.

So he does the next best thing because at the end of the day Dean has always been better with actions instead of words anyway.

He grabs Cas by his shirt and yanks him impossibly close.

Their chests collide and Cas' eyes are wide and shocked and hopeful all at once as their faces find themselves mere inches apart. Dean's attention immediately flickers to those plush lips he's been fantasizing about for far too long and everything inside of him urges him to go for it, but he waits nonetheless, waits patiently for a sign from Cas that this is okay, that this is what he wants too …

Cas leans in the very next second and Dean stops thinking.

When their lips meet Dean feels like a heavy weight has been lifted from his shoulders.

The kiss starts sweet and innocent, some light pressure and nothing more, but then Cas wraps his arms around Dean's torso and aligns their bodies even more and Dean makes a pathetic little noise in the back of his throat before deepening the kiss. He gets lightheaded very fast and only Cas holding him so tightly keeps his knees from buckling in the most embarrassing manner.

Dean never thought it would feel like this. He originally assumed that it would be a bit weird to kiss someone he had known for such a long time. That it would be awkward all around and they would have to get used to the sensation at first before being able to enjoy it thoroughly.

Boy, he's never been more wrong in his life.

Dean is all warm and fuzzy and when the kiss turns even more passionate a moment later his body temperature rises right along with it. Dean moans as hands are roaming over bodies, Cas getting lost in Dean's hair while Dean can't get enough of the guy's ridiculously sharp hipbones, and soon enough Cas is pressed against the wall and Dean is only seconds away from taking things even further.

They've waited long enough after all.

But just as Dean is pushing his fingers underneath Cas' shirt, Cas slows down and eventually breaks to kiss. He draws back a little to gaze right into Dean's eyes and he looks so debauched and wrecked it takes Dean's breath away.

And then Cas whispers, “In case it wasn't clear earlier, I love you,” and Dean's breath is taken away from him in a completely different, yet no less powerful manner.

He feels himself melting into Cas until he buries his face into the guy's neck. It's warm and it smells really nice and Dean can't help smiling into Cas' skin.

“I love you too,” he rasps back. “I've been crazy about you since forever.”

Cas sighs as he lifts his arm to card his fingers through Dean's hair again. “Me too. I never dared to acknowledge it, though. I feared too much that things would change in a way I wouldn't be able to bear.” He drops a light kiss against Dean's temple. “But then Charlie found out about it and she has been pestering me for weeks to tell you and it got me all riled up …”

No wonder Cas has been behaving so oddly recently. He clearly had no idea what to do.

Dean actually shares the sentiment. He's pretty sure he wouldn't have acted any differently if their roles would have been reversed.

“Well,” Dean whispers, “I guess it all worked out in the end.”

“Because you forgot your phone at the office.”

Dean grins. “I'm sure we would've figured it out eventually. But yeah, me being a forgetful idiot sure helped.”

Cas just hums before he pulls Dean deeper into his embrace and Dean can't help but think that this might very well be the best moment of his entire life, hands down.

---

The next day when they both walk over to Dean's mom for their weekly Saturday brunch Dean introduces Cas as his boyfriend to his whole family and he manages to only blush a little as he does so.

Nobody seems surprised about their new relationship status in the slightest.

And two years later, when they exchange their wedding vows, Cas stares deeply into Dean's soul and says tearfully, “I'm stupid,” and of course Dean has to answer that with a wobbly, “I'm stupid too,” and Sam yells from somewhere in the background, “You're both stupid alright!”

It's perfect.

[seventeenlovesthree]

Things I loved about Kizuna, which didn’t work for me and where the jury is still out.

Since my impatience is still trying to bridge the time until the 02 movie comes out, I thought about putting my general love-dislike-relationship with Kizuna into words. Because like with every movie I love, there are usually also things I will have my issues with. Granted, this is very personal and very biased, but I’ll still try my best to explain myself.

Things I loved:

The nostalgia bait: Call it cliché, but I was one of the people on whom the nostalgia pandering absolutely worked. I had watched Digimon Adventure for the first time back in the lovely year 2000 and as someone, who did have their issues with how Tri was presented, my first time watching Kizuna gave me everything: Goosebumps, tears, screaming “I KNOW THAT REFERENCE!” out loud. Up to this day, I am STILL finding references, I am still humming along Bolero when it plays at the beginning and I have no shame in admitting all of that. I loved the sap, I loved the cheese and I did enjoy being pandered to.

The light/cinematography/animation: I will try very hard not to gush over this too much, but despite the fact that everyone seemed much paler than they’d usually be, I absolutely loved the light and colour design that was chosen for this movie. The soft, warm tone in the morning and sunset scenes, the menacing orange in cyberspace after getting through the happy, nostalgic pastel tones, the grey/dark tones as the mood changes and everyone is getting more depressed, the cold tones in Neverland... I loved it all. And the same goes for visual framings the characters got, as well as all the symbolism. There are so many mirror/glass scenes in this movie, so many little references and angle changes that make me want to watch the movie again and again to analyze them. 

The fact that the 02 gang was included again: I will be one of the first to claim that Kizuna was absolutely meant to be damage control after Tri and one of the first things they fixed was making sure that all 12 Chosen Children would appear at least ONCE on screen. Granted, unfortunately not everyone was treated equally in this, but the fact that they were actually THERE was still satisfying.

Menoa Bellucci: Even if one might argue that her conflict had been just as much of a reference to previous works/characters as mentioned in the nostalgia bait section (Hurricane Touchdown/Wallace, Tri/Maki), I love her potential (no pun intended). I say this because there could have been even more to be done with her, but in general, the genius girl and unreliable narrator of this story turning into an antagonist because of her own personal wishes and saviour complex is just... Exactly my jam. And I am really curious to see whether or not we’ll see her again.

The “fairy tale” aspect: The entirety of Neverland, alluding to Peter Pan and the idea of never becoming an adult, yet, as Digimon always does, framing this to be a bad thing, is also something I highly enjoy. Again, it may be a cliché and overdone at this point (and I do hope it will not be the central theme in the 02 movie), but I adore this kind of storytelling; an alternate realm, a parallel world that fulfills wishes... That stuff has always mattered in Digimon and it was more terrifying this time than ever before. I do love the brainwashing aspect and the horror behind it all, because watching them all break through this makes it even better. (I kinda feel like we might get some “Jack and the Beanstalk” framing in the 02 movie and if that turned out to be the case, it’d blow me away.)

Things that didn’t work for me:

The extent of the suffer porn (mainly Taichi-centric, but also in regards to Yamato and Sora): Look. I do have an affinity for works that make their main characters suffer. As long as there is a catharsis at some point. The way we had already watched six movies (and a stageplay) dealing with Taichi’s growing pains had just been... Rather painful. I love that boy, I have analyzed his arc countless times and up to this point, I could make sense of it for the most part. But the fact that his happy end was only hinted at left me incredibly dissatisfied. I am aware of what happens by the end of the movie, I am aware of the epilogue, I KNOW he will get there, so the hopeful note still remains. I mean, Digimon never shied away from writing realistic arcs for their characters, but I really just want to see Taichi happy again. The whole part of showing him being “a performative, yet lonely and unhappy adult that also gets punished for his depression”, as relatable and realistic as it was, still made it horrifying to think about that this may have been the last time we’d actually see him. Because we didn’t know there would be another movie in this timeline... I am very keen on outlining, drawing and writing about how he will get to his happy end (according to my own headcanons, that is), but I also reeeeeally want to see that happen. Especially because everything was just limited to a small main core of characters, so we didn’t even know if the other characters weren’t suffering as well. The “fate” of losing their partners still seems to be limited to Taichi, Yamato and Sora after all, as they had been the ones who had never fully come to terms with how they wanted their lives to turn out, but for the most part, we didn’t actually see a lot. Speaking of “not seeing it happen”...

Sora’s absence: The fact that “To Sora” was NOT part of the movie itself bugs me to no end. Because there are enough people who have NEVER seen that short film and thus, to them, her absence in the movie does NOT make sense at all. And it can make sense if you know about the background - maybe even intertwining it into her entire arc. It’s such a beautiful little addition to her personal development and while it is also as unfulfilling as Taichi’s route (especially because I’m currently going through a very similar situation as she does), it at least EXISTS. She deserves so much more than always getting the shortest end of the stick. SPEAKING OF WHICH...

The fact that we never got an animated version of “The Candle of Life”: Once I read that little part in the Kizuna novels, my disappointment was skyrocketing to immeasurable heights. Seriously, this passage, just like “To Sora”, did SO MUCH for Koushirou’s character as a whole, framed and foreshadowed his entire purpose in that movie flawlessly and in such an endearing and human way that it just baffles me that we might never see that on screen... I love that Koushirou is going places, following his aspirations and functions as the communicator and glue that keeps everyone together, still implied to be close with his bff and all, but I wish my boy could also catch a break at some point.

The jury is still out to decide.

The character designs: I have a huuuuge love-hate relationship with the character designs to be honest, because again, there is so much potential that seemed to go unused with it. They did try to merge the adult style the OG 01 and 02 seasons had with something modern and fresh - and I am thankful that they gave several characters parts of their uniqueness back which Tri’s designs partly took away (such as Koushirou and Jyou having pitch black eyes). And - who wouldn’t be happy to finally see the babies all grown up, pretty and proper!!! It IS a very pretty style. But it was/is still clear that they haven’t perfected it yet. The artbook implies that the characters had been even more expressive than they were IN the movie, but I assume that is also due to the fact that the story didn’t allow for many comic relief scenes. But if there were any, it was amazing (and I really liked the more light-hearted moments a lot!). But this way, the emotional range of Yamato and Koushirou, for example, was heavily unter-utilized and that is a shame. Instead, we sometimes got severe cases of same-face-syndrome and stiffness and you can tell that there is so much more this style is capable of - it just needs a little more polishing. (Also EVERYONE was really slender in the art style - which was also present in the original style and may and may not have played a role in the character development as well, like we can assume in Taichi’s case, since he has quit football and all... But still, differences in body types could have been nice!)

Design wise, we have basically three categories: 1.) I love it/It fits, 2.) It’s okay, but could have been better and 3.) WHY?.

Category 1 goes to Sora, Yamato, Ken, Miyako, Hikari and Takeru. Sora changed her bangs for the third time and she’s finally wearing pants again, she’s gorgeous. Yamato is nicely toned, even wears glasses and got back to his signature hairstyle that still fits. Funnily enough, I think I am one of the few who thought the short hair Ken got was nice - I understand why people would mourn his original hairstyle, but I appreciated that they did something daring for the first time. Miyako’s colourful attire is absolutely her (even though I have yet to understand what exactly she is wearing in the 02 movie). Hikari’s design may appear simple, but it does give her a very sophisticated aura - even more so in the 02 movie, in which her hair has actually grown a bit. Also adding the fact that the designers knew exactly what they were doing by giving her a lot of see-through pieces of clothing. Takeru giving off all “You can support my writings on Patreon, I also listen to K-Pop, gotta head to Starbucks quickly” energy in the world couldn’t have turned out any better. 

Category 2 goes to Taichi, Daisuke, Jyou and Iori. I do understand why they went with a slimmed down version of Taichi, indicating that he hasn’t done much sport in a while, but that and his lack of tan made him appear like an entirely different person. The same goes for Daisuke - and I know for a fact that I wasn’t the only one who thought his hair was very similar to Koushirou’s in the first scene he appeared in. Jyou and Iori were just very... Safe, to say the least. I understand why people mourn Jyou’s hair and cooler glasses, but at least Iori seems to appear more buff in the 02 movie thanks to his Kendo training.

Category 3 goes to Mimi and Koushirou. Mimi is a very difficult case for me, because I get why she is restraining her hair like that, as it is more practical - however, there was no reason why she didn’t wear the outfit they showed in the credits for the movie. Whenever people said her main outfit felt like “kindergarden teacher”, I had to agree... And when it comes to Koushirou, I feel like sighing constantly. It’s understandable that we haven’t seen him outside of business attire in a while now (and I’m happy that he’s still rocking his associated colour orange as consistently as he does), but the fact that they gave him his 10-year-old haircut back is just... Not okay. Give that boy the company boss aura he deserves, he already looks way too slender for the clothes he is wearing, and he deserves to finally have his arc of “finding his style” resolved at some point.

The ambiguity: I absolutely LOVE theorizing about the TRUE origin of why the partnerships have been vanishing - whether it was actually due to the “becoming adults = losing potential” theory Menoa had (which was disproven by several characters in universe, such as Jyou and Daisuke) or because of the various theories the fandom came up with, such as “the neglect theory” or, even more importantly, “the stagnation theory”. I do love the fan theories more, because if you take the idea presented in the movie, it CAN be read as rather disheartening (and there’s a reason why many interpreted it as trying to tell the viewer “Stop being so nostalgic for this series and move on already!”, even though the end implied that a balance of cherishing your past experiences and use them to move forward in a constructive way is still the best approach). My gut tells me that we miiiiight get an official version once the 02 movie comes out, but up until then and as much as I love speculating, it’s a shame that a lot of people are very hard pressed on what the actual reason is. Others say it’s a huge plothole - and really, that could absolutely also be the case.

The fact that there wasn’t/isn’t “more”: I am still torn between wanting to give the OG timeline some rest and wanting to see the babies I grew up with still going on adventures. The 02 movie coming out this year proves that the franchise - and this timeline in particular - is still profitable. And the little shorts we got besides “To Sora” were just so lovely that a part of me still wishes there was more of this, a little Slice of Life series about the Chosen Children dealing with their everyday lives as adults... So we’ll see if there will be any more content in the future, depending on how the 02 movie will do.

[blackcandlesinwinter]

Anyway, on a less grouchy note: a decent educator works on developing their classes with the sort of devotion, research, creativity, and effort that most folks attribute to artists or performers. We spend so much time researching the best ways to help our students learn and we creatively craft the activities and assessments and classroom experience out of love and care. We reach out to students who are struggling and we adjust and accommodate what we're doing to try to help them. We sink a TON of emotional effort into what we do. I know there's plenty of shitty professors out there who don't really care about teaching, but I have SO many colleagues to care so, so much and pour so much of themselves into creating a course that will support, uplift, and educate the students there. And I've had professors like that as well (and a few shitty ones and most that are somewhere in between).

Much like with an artist or a performer, a big part of surviving in this profession is to try really, really hard not to take your audience's response to your work personally. And that's hard when you pour so much time and creativity and care into a class and the students just don't respond or engage, or get annoyed that you're asking them to participate in their own learning. You know, intellectually, that there's a million impersonal reasons that might lead to their disengagement. You must always consider that your teaching method just isn't working and you need to adjust it. But it could also be that the students are sleep-deprived, they have shit going on in their lives, they have another exam they're thinking about, they are just cranky that day, they're coming down with a cold, they aren't used to your teaching methods, they're hung over, they're hungry, they are in pain, they skipped a couple of assignments and are now lost, they're first gen students and are still learning the ropes, they're ADHD, they just aren't fully on today for whatever reason, etc. And possibly a couple of them are just kinda assholes. It's so important keep these latter reasons front-and-center in your mind, both to avoid burn-out, and also so you can be compassionate and identify students that have additional needs where you can offer support.

But, we're still human, so sometimes it really does still get to you. Like "You're here because you say you want to learn, so I worked hours and hours designing something from scratch just for you, and then I came up here in front of a crowd of you to present it with all of the passion and care and effort that I can. And y'all don't even want to try it and are just scrolling on your phones and getting pissy with me when I tell you to participate"... that does really sting. No matter how much you try to remind yourself not to take it personally, sometimes it's just gonna get to you. And I guess I just have to wallow in it and vent for a couple days and then take a deep breath and move on.

Anyway, some things that have helped is a) remembering all the really positive interactions I've had with my students that still make me smile and b) checking in with another professor that I trust to get some advice on how to reset the dynamic in the classroom, as well as some reassurance that I don't just suck at my job. I'm armed with a few new ideas now to try and I'm tentatively hopeful that most of the students in the class are actually receptive to what I'm doing and it's just a handful that are bringing things down. Am I still going to end up in a confrontation with one of the students? ... maybe. I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

[silvery-bluish]

1, 4, 13, 23 for ocs of choice for the edgy/misc ask meme 👀

Questions from here!

Thanks for the ask :) gonna answer half for Ars half for BB 'cause I did 13 and 23 for Ars already--

Ars

1.What memory would your OC rather just forget?

Arsinoe clings so damn hard to their memories they're actively talking themself out of thinking about the fact that their memories Probably Aren't Actually Reliable, due to the telepathy and trauma and Meddling. But it's probably just. Parts of things, parts of the Second Farm Stay. Or if they could do Precision Edits-- they could stand to not relive the physical pain and the terror in their dreams, t b h. But that's about it. If they forget about the bad things that happened to them and those they care about, in their mind, that'd be-- giving up, or saying it doesn't matter?

Of course, the degree they cling to it all uuuh definitely isn’t healthy, but. They’re made of memories and if they remember it it’s theirs and they’re (mostly) keeping it!! Museum-perfect frozen, as much as they can manage.

4. When scared, does your OC fight, flee, freeze or fawn?

Arsinoe "if it sucks hit da bricks" Becerra is, about 75% of the time, a Flight Reflex Kinda Guy. They're outta there!!! skedaddling at a moment's notice!!!!! They'll err towards freeze if they don't want to draw attention, or fight if they're backed into a corner, but their first reaction is pretty much always flee.

Bailey/BB

13. If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

I. Probably?? BB’s used to steering conversation and also wearing a Chill Dude mask at almost all times. The Easygoing persona isn’t like. Entirely real, but it’s real Enough. I don’t think we’d be Actually Friends, but like. Work friends energy. He doesn’t let a lot of people close in a genuine way.

23. What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?

Bailey doesn’t Get like. Genuineness, if it’s aimed at him. Honesty doesn’t make sense, where’s the hidden agenda, the meaning-under-the-meaning? It can’t be real, that’d be stupid.

He’s very good at compartmentalizing his own emotions, for the most part, expressing something more palatable instead, something that’ll get the reaction he wants. Something more deliberate. But he’s been doing that for so long, bridging that gap to actually express his own unfiltered emotions is. Difficult, and doesn’t always work. How do you take off the mask when you’ve been wearing it so long it might as well have fused with your own flesh? What do you even look like, underneath?

[mandareeboo]

Unfinished Work #56 "Prior Warnings"

I have nothing to add to this, unfortunately! It was originally gonna be a deep delve into Mariner's issues with stuff. The basic plot line feels pretty obvious- Petra helped Mariner get back on her old medication (for bipolar disorder) and via flashbacks we learn she got diagnosed not long after the war and Buenamigo discouraged her from taking it to keep her unbalanced. It just never had a good ending point.

Title: Prior Warnings

Summary: N/A

"I just wanted to let you know," Beckett says, "y'know, so you don't see it on my file later and have a conniption fit?"

Captain Freeman very pointedly ignores that, studying the updated medical info. Most of it is things she knows. A long life under various healing instruments, multiple surgeries, quite a few charges of disorderly conduct to medical staff. The Abilify is new, but not exactly surprising.

She raised an immaculate eyebrow. "The hell is Tegretol?"

Mariner shifts quite awkwardly, and Carol knows she's hit a nerve. But what else was she supposed to say? It's the only new thing on the damn list.

"It's an old prescription," she decides finally. "Got back on it when I was hanging with Petra."

Captain Freeman hides her frown behind the hologram. Well, as close to hiding it as she can. It's still a bit of a sore spot between the two of them. "Why did you stop before?"

Mariner shrugs. "Didn't want you to see it."

Ah, yes. Because that's comforting. "This medication is necessary, then?"

"Necessary to keep me on track, yeah."

"Alright then." Carol hits the acceptance button. Technically, it's not her jurisdiction to have to do that, but it makes more sense than having Mariner haul the thing down to T'ana. "Should I be concerned about what I just signed?"

"It's medicine, mom," Mariner sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. "For my manic episodes."

She blinks. Blinks again. "I wasn't aware you were diagnosed."

"Yeah, yeah, it happened awhile ago. I just..." Mariner shrugged, crossing her arms defensively. "I like who I am when I'm stable."

Captain Freeman raises her hands in surrender. "You don't have to explain it to me, sweetie."

"Yes," Mariner says, staring at the floor, "I do."

———————————————————————————————————-

"You're going to have to explain it to her, you know."

Mariner's knee bounced, heel tapping obnoxiously against the hospital floor. "What does she even know? What does it matter?"

Uncle Les smiles at her in a way that she finds comforting then but will find sinister much later. "Beckett, you know how Carol is. A great woman. A great Captain. But... not the most understanding. I just worry she'll try to give you medical discharge."

"No, no, no," she mumbles, leg bouncing higher and higher. "She can't. I can't. Doesn't she understand that?" Mariner's breathing went as high as her leg as she tried to calm herself, fingers digging into those weird chairs no one actually feels comfortable in. "Who am I kidding? She doesn't care. And dad doesn't either. He kicked my ass from his ship for a reason."

He pats her shoulder. "S'okay, Mariner. No one says you have to take the meds."

(Buenamigo never said anything bad back then. Mariner can only assume his reasons now. He wanted her unstable. He wanted her to destroy the Freeman family inside and out. And, goddamnit, she kinda did.)

———————————————————————————————————-

"Blurgh," she decides one morning, rolling over in her cot. "Leave me to die."

But Boimler is not as forgiving of her truancy as Mariner lets herself be. He's already in uniform, shaking her shoulder. It's like being on a ship. And not a cool ship. One of those dinky ones on water from the bygone era. "C'mon, get up. I will not be held responsible for you missing your shift."

"You don't have to babysit me," she pouts.

"Someone has to," he rebuffs, with that casual fondness that told Mariner she had the boy hook, line, and sinker. Most days Mariner loves how much her friends care, how they go out of their way to try and help. Today is not one of those days. "Up. I'll replicate a hose, don't test me."

Mariner flipped him off.

"You're not, like, actually sick, are you?" Rutherford asks, coming up to press a hand to her hip. He's a touchy guy. Mariner likes that about him. "Because I will not be okie-dokie if you keel over the entire shift."

"I can be persuaded with blood samples," Tendi chirps, scrolling through her daily routine.

"'M not sick. 'M nauseous," each word comes out like pulled teeth. "Side effect."

"Of?"

"Nunya."

"Mariner," Boimler whines. "We both know the Captain'll haul me into her chambers for a report if you don't come. I cannot handle that pressure today."

Tendi pulls something out of her personal shelf with a triumphant cry, and then there's a needle in Beckett's neck. The world slowly begins to right itself again as the Orion casually pulls her into a sitting position, showing off her now-empty injector with a jazzy wiggle. "I've been keeping them on hand to help with your symptoms," she explains casually, as if Mariner's info isn't private, as if Tendi hadn't hacked the system to help her deal with this.

"D'Vana," Becket says, in all seriousness, "you're a goddess."

"I still want those blood samples," she tells her, grinning ear to ear. "Your physiology is so interesting! Being under the beams but refusing to be healed all the way for your badass scars has left some seriously neat outliers."

———————————————————————————————————-

"They may... want to do some tests."

"Oh, bullshit." Mariner rolls her eyes. "Bipolar isn't new."

"No, but it is uncured."

"So is every goddamn mental illness."

"Exactly!" Uncle Les held up his hands. "You know how medical can be."

(Tendi makes it okay, she reminds herself firmly. Tendi would never harm her. Or, well, if she did, she'd at least warn her beforehand. Tendi's heard plenty of stories of her clocking assholes in the jaw for less.)

———————————————————————————————————-

"It's like you're a whole different person," Ransom marvels over their weekly beer night, and Beckett bristles.

"Am not," she snaps back. "I'm still the same psycho badass who'd fight you over the last martini."

Ransom shakes his head, looking disappointed in himself. "Bad choice of words. But you're a lot... calmer? You talk slower. You're thinking things out more. People can actually have a conversation with you."

"It's like pulling teeth," she admits cheerfully. "You know how hard it is to argue when I talk like a grandma? What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Listen to the other side and find compromise?"

"Hmm, no, gross."

He snorts and takes a long swig. Weekly beer night is also, arguably, a strange aspect of the newly medicated Beckett Mariner. Ransom had done everything short of begging Freeman to let her have a different mentor. And as obnoxious as Ransom was, she kind of got it? They'd always mingled like oil and water. Alcohol hadn't exactly fixed the situation, but it had made it more bearable on both of them.

Ransom swishes his beer in his mouth and swallows. Beckett opened her mouth to mock him for it, but he beat her to the punch. "So, uh, freshly diagnosed orrrr..."

"The fuck, Jack? Did you go snooping on my files?"

He levelled her a very flat look. "Mariner, your twisted ass mental state has been a long-time bet on the Cerritos. I just happen to know what mania looks like."

"Huh," she said, not having known that. "No, long time ago. Blipped on the radar after my first PTSD scan, so... six years ago? Seven?"

Ransom, damn him, can do basic math. "You were, what, nineteen? Twenty?"

"Yeah, man. I had a lot of messed up shit happen to me in my late teen years."

"Huh," he echoed, not exactly sounding surprised by that. "That damn war ruined all of us."

Mariner, deciding not to answer that, slugs her beer. "So, Jack. You win that bet?"

"Heh, nah. I found the whole thing invasive and rude. I put down for brain worms."

"Rude."

———————————————————————————————————-

"What if... what if they like me better... stable?" Mariner asks quietly.

Uncle Les pats her shoulder, nodding sympathetically. "They might."

"But I'll still be me. I'll just be less hyper."

"So they'll like diet you more. It's normal. You're.. a handful, Beckett."

(Better a handful than complacent. Ransom gets that. They hate each other, but they at least understand each other.)