#but the actual act would be just as much of an issue for him
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i wrote a whole ass psychology breakdown (for the first time in FOREVER) about the break-up. enjoy (if you so choose):
so I've been reading a lot in relation to Tommy's speech during the break-up (and have actually gotten through the scene several times now, mostly as a creative reference for these fix-it fics. I think one of the first things that I've seen completely tossed aside (that bothers the shit out of me as someone with over a decade of therapy treatment and a psychology degree) is whatever trauma Tommy carries.
We know that there are issues with his dad. We know Lou's lore behind him is that he spent a lot of his childhood alone. We don't know anything in relation to his mom, but she may or may not be the cause of more trauma. We know that his way of dealing with abuse of authority is to shut down and follow the leader, which is likely a mix of his military time and growing up in his father's household (and when I say this, I mean from what we saw of him under Gerrard's command). This is a person who has put years into getting himself into some version of okay after all that he's endured, and we know he still generally does it on his own.
To that end, here, have my breakdown of the break up (roughly right about the time Buck says "I want you to move in with me"). (with pictures!)
Prior to the offer, we watch Tommy process through Evan's explanation about his relationship with Abby, things being transformative for him, etc. We have to bare in mind that this is where we also start to get what I've dubbed "starry-eyed Buck". He's so in the throes of what he's saying that I don't think he's really considering the connotation of his words. At the same time, Tommy doesn't know what lore Evan is about to drop him about this prior relationship. Remember that he now has to contend with the fact that they both have strong opinions on their relations toward Abby, and Tommy can't know if their feelings toward her as a person will be the same. I think Lou played this beautifully, appearing anxious and apprehensive as Tommy listened to Evan explain that Abby was transformative for him. Then he shifts into how Tommy has been transformative for him (which, he has, and we as the audience know this, but we understand it from a bigger POV than what Evan is saying with his words.)
There have been posts about Evan putting Tommy up on a pedestal throughout this speech (and really, possibly even sooner, but this is where we really get it expressed). Tommy tries to rectify this to a degree by countering "I wasn't always that way".
To that end, we then get Evan telling him "I know, and it just makes me admire you more." Tommy gives a bashful smile, clearly heartened by the statement, and even opening his mouth as though he's going to respond to it in some form. It would be interesting to know what was on Lou's mind of what (if anything) he thought would've been said there. Are there lines that were removed in this scene? Was 'I love you' actually going to come up? We can't really know. However, there's this part of me that thinks that Tommy thought that they were having a discussion on the depth of their relationship which would've possibly brought those 7 letters to the equation. Either way, this entire bit of facial acting is SO important, because it speaks volumes about how Tommy feels about how Evan feels about him.
From there we get the "I want you to move in with me, and this, THIS, THIS is such an important point for this ENTIRE scene. It's two seconds, but it holds SO much for the narrative. This man, who seems to be on the verge of ...something, clearly (who knows if I Love You was on his mind, or if it was just the fact that Evan was expressing how much he cares about him.) The reason this is all so important is THIS REACTION:
Now again, we don't know Tommy's trauma, but the joy literally drops out of his expression and shifts to panic. Now, speaking solely from the standpoint that these two haven't even said "I love you" yet, his boyfriend steamrolled over him from a possible declaration of love straight to moving in together without discussing semantics. Further, it's not even "I want to live together", it's "move in with me". We don't know much about Tommy's house (because these shitheads haven't built him a set yet), but we know that he has a HOUSE. With a GARAGE. Buck lives in a LOFT. Regardless of how much of an asshole this makes me sound like, it's crawling with red flags. It comes across as "fit more into my life" instead of "lets do this thing together". Further, if that's not bad enough, mention of getting engaged and married is thrown at Tommy as well, which holds two major bits of information: One, these are on Evan's mind. We've NEVER heard him talk about getting engaged or married to anyone. This speaks to the importance of their relationship to him, but the lack of I Love You also speaks on his own trauma. If we truly are getting the rom-com trope, at some point there's likely to be a conversation about why he lept over it (*cough* Taylor, his parents *cough cough*). Meanwhile, as he's continued in his starry-eyed speech, this is what Tommy is giving:
Now for those who don't know how to spot it, this my friends is a PANIC RESPONSE. The shift forward, the move to get up, the literal deep breath. He's having a panic attack. Now, obviously we don't know what brought this on, but god-willing, we WILL get the answers.
Now, to his own point, Tommy doesn't just straight up pop Evan's pink bubble. He does express that it's a sweet sentiment, but that it's a bad idea. To which point we get:
"Evan, that is so sweet. But I can't move in with you." "And why not?" Because. I know how this ends." "Uh, what-what's that supposed to mean?"
At which point, we clearly get the qualities about Evan that Tommy likes. "Incredible guy. Big-hearted. Hot as hell. Impulsive." I don't feel that the expression here matters as much as his tone of voice, because we can see on his face that he's expressing these qualities from a good place. The next point of reference isn't until Tommy's next line, when he says that Evan's reaction is out of things being "new and exciting".
To that end, the way Evan is talking to him makes this statement valid. He's not talking to Tommy like they've been together for six months and have built a relationship that should be moving in this direction. (For the tenth time I will repeat, he couldn't even dignify whether he was in love with Tommy when Josh asked).
Furthermore, I think when you consider this part of the scene, you also have to consider the strain in Tommy's voice. Something about those concepts (living together, getting engaged, married) is terrifying. It definitely gives the impression that Tommy has been faced with some version of this before and he got burned. Why is this important? Because of this:
"I'm saying no matter how bad I want it to be, I'm not your last." Those 9 words are important on their own, but when you couple them with the expression on Tommy's face and what we've just seen him go through, there's a clear point to the fact that he's been through this before. I also think that there can't be enough importance placed on the way he intonates "how bad". This is not a man saying no because he doesn't want to. He's backpedaling because he's sure that he's going to get burned. We get this point further driven home with this exchange:
"I'm your first." "But hey, they can be the same thing." "But, they usually aren't."
See this doesn't read to me as someone who's scared because he knows Evan has never been with another man. They're both fully grown adults who have had multiple relationships. What this speaks to me (now) as, is someone who has let someone convince him before that he would be their forever, that they were all in, and then broke him. When you include his childhood trauma and whatever abandonment issues it's left him with in correlation with all of this, yes, it's still an extremely biphobic set of lines. But in the context of what he's expressing and why, it's not about telling Evan he needs more experience, it's about telling him that he doesn't believe that he'll want to stay settled down with him six months, a year, etc., down the road. And THAT my friends, is abandonment issues 101. "Everyone else has left, so it doesn't matter that I'm in love with you, because you will leave too, and I need to protect myself from that."
Following that, we get this: "if I were to move in with you, you wouldn't mean to, you wouldn't plan for it, but you'd end up breaking my heart."
This line is SO important, right next to Evan's exchange with Josh about his relationship with Tommy. Why? Because even though neither of them have said it, it spells out that these two are in fact in love with each other, even if they haven't said it.
"I don't think I could deal with that." Tommy is fucking GONE on him. He's expressing that if he gave himself fully over to what Evan's referring to, losing him would break him. Again, we don't have the full picture on his trauma, but we know there's a mountain there. It's also worth noting again, that the intonation he uses in these statements clearly come across as someone trying to reign in their emotions and keep it together. That says to me that we're dangeously close to touching his trauma.
I don't feel like I have to include the final few bits of the scene in gifs because they're all over the site now, but the next line gives over the fact that he hasn't really been open about his trauma to Evan, given that his immediate response to expressing all of this is "I should go". This kind of reaction is generally brought on as not being accepted for having certain feelings. Now, obviously Evan is caught off guard by the entire interaction, the same way Tommy was (but for different reasons), so we have to take all of that into account when we think about the fact that instead of countering Tommy's logic, he asks instead if Tommy is breaking up with him.
Body language is also so important here for Tommy. His shoulders are hunched in, we see him wipe his face (meaning there are likely tears), and when he turns around, he's so caught up in whatever wave has taken him over that it takes Evan asking him for Tommy to state "yeah, I guess I did" about breaking up. Further, there's the fact that he states that he didn't see the break-up coming, which goes back to my point at the top of this post, that he clearly thought the conversation was going one direction, and instead it goes the other. From this point, we have Evan reeling, because he wants to create more of a life with Tommy, while Tommy is shutting down because of whatever is holding him back.
Finally, as I've referenced before, we get this line:
"Should've known that parking spot was too good to be true."
That line makes zero sense out of context, but in consideration of someone trying to lighten the weight they're carrying (which you can literally see by the way he has his hand on his neck, which you generally only see people do as a stress response). You can also double entendre this statement that getting to be with Evan was too good to be true. We get that little inhale with the smile, and I swear to God the only time I've seen that kind of reaction is right before someone cracks.
And then in closing, we get the "I'll see you 'round, Buck," our closing gut punch. Evan is still reeling, clearly. His face is very "what the hell just happened". Tommy is clearly not okay. This entire scene has opened an entire can of worms on them without a whole lot of answers.
Now, I've owned the fact that basically from the end of 806, I felt like this had to be a swerve, and that there has to be more to the story. I've also pretty much owned the fact that if the writers did actually just do this for kicks and don't have a resolution for it, I may not keep watching. However, in the context of the fact that, for the moment, I'm choosing to put hope in some kind of resolution, these lines make so much more sense. It is worth noting though, most people in the fandom, let alone the general audience, aren't going to psychologically break this shit down line-by-line. They're not going to lean into whatever trauma Tommy has that we don't know about yet. Its why the internet has been a mess since Thursday night. But it's also why I talk about how, when this situation gets resolved (because right now I refuse to say if), Buck has to give up the loft and give more of himself. Tommy, by the nature of the show, has fully immersed himself in Evan's life, but we haven't seen or heard mention of Evan doing so at all in Tommy's life. That doesn't mean he hasn't, but we haven't gotten any version of that. So when I say Evan needs to give things up... it's about matching what he's asking Tommy to give up. Because at the end of the day, when this circles back around, he's effectively going to be asking Tommy to trust that he won't break his heart like others have, and when you have a lifetime of abandonment issues and have learned to cope by being hyper-independent and alone, moving in the opposite direction is more terrifying than anything else. ESPECIALLY when you love that person, which we saw Tommy spell out. Evan has the ability to break him (and probably already is via this cut-off-at-the-quick break up.)
So, I'm really gonna need these shit heads to figure out that they'll be more miserable apart than they'd ever be together.
That's all. Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
#mel's musings#bucktommy#mel's psychological breakdowns#psychoanalysis#break up breakdown#tevan#kinley#firepilot#firebeast
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Whore ࿐ྂ Kinktober. 21, oct.
(late post) ♡ part 1
— pairing: Spencer Reid x girlfriend!reader
— type: smut, Kinktober (Criminal Minds Edition)
— kink: edging play
— summary: You are tired of Spencer's brat behavior and decide to give him a taste of his own medicine. After all, despite everything, he will always be your little whore at the end of the day.
— word count: 2.2k
— tags/warnings: kinktober 21st day, female!reader, boyfriend!Reid, edging play, orgasm denial, degradation, praise kink, drunk sex, reader is a member of the BAU, argument, handjob, jealously, cock worship, body worship, slapping, punishment, crying, dacryphilia, semi-public sex, teasing, implied/referenced cheating (BUT NO REALLY), drunken flirting, relationship issues, trust issues, BAU Team mentioned, minor JJ x Prentiss, minor Reid x JJ (BUT NO REALLY), lesbian!JJ mentioned, brat!Reid, brat tamer!reader, light sadism, light hurt/comfort, masochist!Reid, sub!Reid, dom!reader, long hair!Reid/Jesus!Reid. no use of y/n. english is not my first language.
— tagging list: @thatredlipped-classic @purplehaze206 @ehedrick012110 @hotchsmutrecs @slutcakes00 @emma-e-a @helo1281917
— crossposting: AO3
Going to a pub with the rest of the BAU team had been a bad decision. A decision that Spencer made by impulse, always enjoying making you jealous when he was a little bored. He had promised that night you two could finally finish watching the new TV show released on Netflix, but instead he convinced you to go with him to drink with your friends.
Despite the slight disappointment of having to change your schedule for the night, you did not mind too much. You loved having fun with the team and you were almost sure Spencer had learned his lesson after the last punishment when you sat on his face for hours, riding him and using his lips to reach your orgasm, as if he was nothing but your favorite sex toy. And indeed he really was and loved to be that for you.
However, Spencer was also a spoiled little whore. Accepting Morgan's invitation to go with the BAU friends to the pub was supposed to be a true fun time. If he had not fucked up everything by flirting with JJ, you really could have had fun with all of them instead of spending every fifteen minutes drinking a new glass of wine. He wanted to get a reaction out of you, something that would make you mad at him again and making him receive the best orgasm of his whole life, as always happened.
At first, you tried to ignore it. JJ distanced herself from him, also not really liking his not-so-innocent flirting. She did not want you to think she was actually interested about your boyfriend. JJ was the type of woman who was more interested especially about Emily, but also about Garcia and even you sometimes. Reid was not even interested in his friend too, it was all only to tease you. But it was still uncomfortable and no one of the group wanted to be in the middle of the possible argument that would ensue if Spencer continued acting with that childish behavior.
When JJ began to ignore the flirting, Spencer sighed with frustration, drinking his whiskey and looking around the establishment. He saw a beautiful curvy woman sitting alone, also drinking the same whiskey. Noticing his gaze, she smirked, fiddling with her long blonde hair before waving at the shy Spencer.
Morgan's attention immediately went to Spencer, noticing how he giggled at the woman's invitation and handed the promise ring to Morgan, who put it inside his jeans pocket before snorting. "Fuck. That's enough, Pretty Boy. You're really crossing the line now."
Morgan knew about Reid's way of attracting your dominant side. He did not think it was all bad, but he also knew that sometimes his friend crossed some limits. And this was something much more serious than the last few situations. "It's just harmless flirting, dude. You know I love my darling more than anything and anyone in this whole world." Spencer defended himself, really annoyed that Morgan thought he was thinking about cheating the woman who had his heart in the palm of her hands.
"Anyway, Reid. This isn't cool, man. You're already making things tense by trying to flirt with JJ in front of everyone. And now you're still gonna do it while your fucking girlfriend's in the bathroom? What kind of gentleman are you?" It was Prentiss's turn to argue, crossing her arms disapprovingly. "It just makes you look like a terrible boyfriend. Actually, it's a real shame for us, for her and for yourself..."
Spencer's eyes widened with shock. He had never seen things this way. He knew he was acting bratty and spoiled, flirting for fun just to get your punishment. Most of the time, Spencer thought you liked the adrenaline rush. However, looking at the real view, he was starting to worry that you were actually hurt by him. Anyone who did not know the two of you well would think he was an cheating man who did not even respect his own girlfriend in public.
"Oh, holy shit..." He sighed in frustration, rubbing his hand over his face, trying to ward off the effects of the alcohol. Spencer looked at each of the older agents, the slight anger in Morgan and Emily faces, the disappointment in Hotch, Garcia and Rossi eyes, and the clear discomfort in JJ's flushed cheeks, which most of the time was the focus of his annoying advances. "Damn, Jen. I sure I'm just-"
Spencer was about to apologize to his friend, but stopped when he heard laughter. A laugh he knew all too well. The entire team looked back, Spencer's face turning pale as he saw a man with an arm around your waist as you two walked to the table. He tried to say anything, anything at all, but all he could think about was how much stronger the man was than him, practically the same height but with a huge difference in muscles, his large hand clasped around your waist as if you were a little doll.
"Guys, this is Nicholas. Or Nick. As I prefer to call him. We met at a coffee shop a few days ago. Nick, these are my teammates at the BAU." You smiled, hands on his strong arm that was bursting out of his white shirt.
"Hey..." The man said with an attempt at a friendly smile, but he did not quite manage it. Spencer was profiling him too well to know that Nicholas was trying his best not to let his arousal show through the shorts he wore, due to your warm hand on his skin.
Spencer waited for you to introduce himself as your boyfriend, to tell the stupid boy that you were his girl. However, the brief look you gave his empty finger was enough to let him know you were nor going to do that. Spencer internally cursed himself for taking off the damn ring and giving it to Morgan. That stupid plan to flirt with the blonde girl in the other part of the pub had already evaporated from his mind, but the consequences were just coming.
After some more time of small talk, Nicholas finally left, saying he needed to get back to the house because he had to study for a casting audition the next morning. The agents said goodbye to him with friendly waves, while Spencer continued with that angry stare, his bad mood only getting worse when Nicholas gave you a brief grab on your ass and a soft kiss on your cheek, humming something like "See you another day, princess" and coming out as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
The atmosphere became tenser after the same moment that the pub bell rang to announce Nicholas's departure. "Well, I guess my girlfriend's nothing but a fucking greedy whore..." Before anyone could argue, you grabbed Spencer's arm without any usual tenderness. Morgan even tried to get up to help both of you resolve the situation, afraid that it would escalate into a violent argument. Even though he trusted his best friends, the thought of a stubborn couple fighting after drinking so much whiskey and wine made him apprehensive, but Hotch motioned for him to remain seated, indicating that the argument was none of their business. The entire team knew Spencer and you well enough to know what would happen in the pub bathroom.
"You really think you've any right to call me a whore?" You growled, your hand unbuttoning the khakis that Reid was wearing, listening to him whimper and try to cover the damp spot on his white boxers. He wanted to keep arguing. He wanted to stay angry as hell after your intentional flirt with that idiot playboy. Spencer really doubted that Nicholas was as smart as he was. Or that Nicholas had as many bachelor's degrees and doctorates as he had. "You think you've the right to call me a fucking greedy whore, when you're the one who's always teasing me, hitting on all the women just to piss me off?"
Your fist closed around his cock, already turned on and sensitive just from the tension of the fight. Spencer tried. He really tried hard to take control. But that had been impossible after you dragged him through the halls while he was calling Nicholas a "stupid actor" and saying you were a cockslut desperate for male attention. Anyway, the wiser reaction was being pushing him against the wall of the women's bathroom — fortunately empty thanks to the few people in the establishment.
"And you are, darling. You're a little whore..." Spencer growled, closing his eyes so he would not watch how your hand moved so quickly on his cock, pinky and needy of your touch, already dripping and proving that he was your little whore, and not the other way around.
"Oh, am I?" You increased the speed, the natural lubrication that dripped from his glans not being enough to stop the slight stinging that came with the friction. It was like rubbing himself raw, and yet Spencer moaned, rolling over his eyes with the ache, whimpering for more. “You look like a noisy slut.” You spat on his cock to ease the pain he was enjoying. On the one hand it was good, as the burning subsided and your saliva was cold from the wine you drank before the argument. But on the other hand, Spencer pouted at the lack of agony and the way you began to rub him slowly. "You like it when it hurts so bad, don't you?"
Your mockery made Spencer bite his lip and smirk, his cheeks flushed with a look that indicated how much he always enjoyed suffering at your hands. He lifted his hips forward and you watched with a raised eyebrow as he fucked himself inside your hand, his hips starting slowly and enjoying the way you let him use your fist to pleasure himself. You did not even need to move, seeing his slutty smile and head arched back, his jaw line forming such a perfect angle that you had to stop yourself from moaning at the sight.
When Spencer's hip movements started to get faster and more erratic, you huffed and took your hand away from his crotch, the soft sound of his cock hitting back against his own thin stomach mixing with the sound of your boyfriend's whimpers.
"You see now? You're nothing but a brainless brat, Spencer. Can't you even ask me to cum? You always have to make a mess? Can't you do anything right?" You practically yelled and he sobbed, squirming against the wall and ignoring the cold tile pressed against his pretty ass.
"I'm so sorry, darling..." He sobbed again, one hand trying to touch himself and the other running through your hair as a way of wanting to beg you for forgiveness, but without saying that.
"Yeah, you should feel that way."
The sad pout appeared on Spencer's lips again. He should not have called you a whore. He should not have arguing with you for letting Nicholas flirt right in front of him, when he teased you like that all the time too. In fact, Spencer had realized that he should not have extended this kind of teasing for so long. He had crossed boundaries and made your relationship stressful. Spencer knew you were hurt by this now and he could not blame you.
"Darling..." He tried to touch you, but you pulled away, spitting into your palm and wrapping your fingers around his girth for the third time, hearing his eager whine. You knew he was just jealous, actually always feeling insecure and wanting punishments. However, you did not want to hear anything right now. You pulled his shirt up, forcing the fabric over his mouth, which he bit against his will, despite the tears in his eyes. Tears that were both of relief at being touched again and sadness at knowing that you did not even want to hear his apologies.
"Stay like that. Like the jealous and needy little slut you are." You ordered, kneeling on the floor in front of Spencer and staring at the sight. His wide teary eyes, his teeth biting into his shirt, his flushed cheeks and his long hair damp with sweat... And most of all, his skinny body and belly contracting in anticipation, your nimble fingers caressing the reddish head of his cock with a smirk on your face, lightly licking the tip and hearing a muffled whimper escaping from those pretty swollen lips. "I'm gonna tease you for as long as I want. And you can just cum when I tell you to, you understand?"
The sharp slap you gave his thigh made Spencer sob with both pain and pleasure, pulsing in your hand as he nodded with some desperation. He needed this. He needed to cum. He needed to be a good boy for you. Your own little whore.
"That's it, my good boy." Despite your anger, you actually smiled for the first time since the whole damn mess started, pressing a soft kiss to the red mark on his skin where you hit him. And Spencer's cheeks flushed, not just because of the horny, but also because he loved you so much. He would be your good boyfriend again.
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#venusbyline#venusbyline's kinktober#kinktober 2024#kinktober masterlist#kinktober#kinktember#spencer reid smut#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x female reader#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid#spencer reid criminal minds#criminal minds smut#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds x you#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid imagine#smut scenarios#smut fanfiction#my writing#my fics#mgg x reader#jesus reid#spencer reid x y/n#reid x reader#spencer reid fic
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something very strong and dark about this, and i think it's very funny that i really picture Si!rafe for this, because of how much he's divided. but what i love the most about that dark content, it's the writing of this, of rafe. it's very interesting because it's true that he's got not regret, but you can see that he's not proud of himself too, he just wanted to do it.
exactly !! i believe he leads with self serving desire entirely and uses excessive arrogance to cover for whatever semblance of ‘guilt’ he may feel.
and i'm thinking, it's crazy how pathetic he is, because Imfaooo he really needed someone who is not conscient just to be sure and to feel more powerful. the misogyny is too real unfortunaly. but actually, Si!rate give me so much this vibe because he's a white kook priviligied man so you can't tell me he would never assault a poor pogue girl?? let's be honest, anywaus i'm talking too much
rafe would be a virgin if it wasn’t for the mass of unconscious woman you find at parties. doesn’t work well under pressure, sensory issues, easily stressed — it’s a culmination of things that makes it so he can never take control and have it be good, especially not for a virgin. so he practises on people like they’re fuck dolls and tells himself woman are all one and the same.
this rafe is also a canon woman killer, racist, & republican supporter.. soooo u tell whether or not he’d sexually assault a woman lmfao.
«uncoordinated » he's not even conscient himself, it's killing me. he's really such an hard case
the biggest thing about this being how he tells himself he’s doing it for his sexual pleasure, when really it’s ambiguous. pussy is pussy and it feels good in all its right but is that what keeps his dick pumping despite the coke ? probably not. inside he knows it’s committing such a shameful act that lets him embrace his depravity and exercise control in one of the most brutal forms.
the sentence, he say it to reader or more to reassure himself?? I'm running crazy
the voicesss… they’re always there. he’s more addressing/affirming himself then he is reader, but also feels so comfortable verbalising threats when he knows no one can hold him to it — especially not when you’re drugged and forced out underneath him like u are.
— r. cameron / reader
warnings: DUBCON — rafe roofies and then rapes reader / unprotected PinV / misogyny / mention of drugs (cocaine & roofies) / mention of virginity / inspiration taken from maddy & nate (euphoria)
synopsis: rafe cameron x fem!reader… sometimes rafe needs to slip a girl a little something at a party to get some, and where’s the shame in that if he knows they want him anyway, they’re just too prudish to admit it.
After you’ve successfully been dosed, he makes you sit on his lap for lack of space on the couch so he can rock you on his knee until you’re tired, delirious, and horny enough to be lifted upstairs, legs dangling against his broad back while you hiccup and giggle next to your upside-down view of his chest.
His nose is numb from the coke and his brain heady, one could argue almost as inebriated as you. But the lines make him oversaturated, not cock-dumb like what he slipped you — eager hands already pawing at his zipper and coming to a fumbled close around the metal just before you’re tossed onto a bed, spread aloof like the crumpled sheets.
“You’re sooo nice to me Rafe.. when all the other guys were sayin’i shoulda gone home,” you end with a belligerent nod of your head, slurring throughout and biting your lip in sexless embarrassment, chewing the skin raw enough to reflect your torn consciousness instead.
Rafe simply smirks, chin protruding outwards while his eyes flit between your thighs peeking through your overridden dress and your tits falling out of the frilly décolletage.
“You a virgin?”
“Mhm” you lie, despite the reeling dizziness occupying your headspace. Besides, nobody likes a whore — especially not rafe, uninterested in ‘stretched out pussy’ as you vaguely recall from his earlier conversation crowded around friends.
He approaches closer now, knocking your trembling knees apart with one of his beefy thighs, bulge forward and creasing in his pants as your dialogue gets him hard already, imposing his physicality in all its glory: “What like— you’ve never even been fingered before?”
You shake your head, tousling curls before staring back up at him, “Only my own.”
To that he chuckles, the noise grating and stunted when he uses it as an excuse to adjust himself in his pants, drawing his chest down further until he’s now hovering above you.
“Uh y’know,” he tongues at his cheek, “I could take care of that for you, practically all spread open an’ready huh?”
Like it wasn’t his plan to get you dumb and stuffed by the end of the night, even if it meant bringing out his inner brute, he was taller, faster, stronger — he could do it if he really wanted, but he made it easy for you instead. Could feel the roofie worming its way into your consciousness, jamming rationality and flooding you with hedonistic desire that would trigger your sex endorphins and make it so that you would want this, that he could brag about it without you opening your bitch mouth the next day and claiming ‘rape’; an ugly word anyways, coming out harsh in a spit, nothing like what rafe was doing to you, especially not with the way you were looking at him.
Your mouth opens, then closes, seemingly flailing on confirmation when really your jaw is getting slack and numb, and so you feel encouraged to nod instead, the movement making your thoughts go all bubbly, refracting Rafe’s glinting eyes at your ‘consent’.
He wastes no time with prep, shoving your dress up so it’s tucked over your tits, basal temperature remaining warm and stuffy despite the exposure to cool air. A good indicator though, means rafe can tell it’s working, and just how long he has before you might start struggling.
When he pulls himself out of his shorts it’s surprising, of course, everything about him is pretty, one would expect a tangible reflection of the cruelty on his features but instead, his dick looks cutesy, if not for the intimidating size.
Spit trickles harshly down his palm when he wraps a hand around himself, tugging quickly and using both his legs to split you around his midriff, leaking and achy despite the inattention you’ve received.
“You want this dick so fuckin’ bad huh,” he laughs at the puddle of arousal leaking out underneath you, considers swiping a finger into it to stick into your mouth but he doubts you’d be able to breathe right now if he interfered with the half catatonic features on your face, and it’s not like he’s out for that type of violence anyways (or at least not right now).
When he pushes himself inside you’re silent, pupils retreating in favour of a squeal — ironically a very Rafe-esque trait — while Rafe bites down into his cheek and rolls his palm over your chest to ease the pressure of the fit.
“Thought the roofie woulda loosened you up a bit..” mumbled out while his stomach clenches, now bracing his entire heavy arm across your abdomen and pinching skin when you involuntarily quiver at the weight, “You can take it c’mon.”
He thrusts hard and uncoordinated, fucking like he knows he’s hot, or at least how many more pills he has left in his stash. Knocking against your insides and entirely focused on the way his dick feels, knowing how easily he could move onto another victim, and just how much he wants to enjoy you in particular before it’s over.
Sweat clings to both your bodies, the slick getting louder when each thrust manages to pound a squelch out of you, spattering against the sheets or catching on Rafe’s balls to stick the both of you together with messy tendrils.
You’re pliant, let him move your legs so your ankles entwine behind his back, heavy hand locking them together and giving you both little breathing room; just enough for him to spill obscenities straight into your emotionless face with hot, sticky breath — he laughs, manically and seemingly at his own joke, before deciding to share it with you, “just don’t go running ‘bout me ‘assaulting’ you right. You wanted this, not my fault my cock’s so good the slut has to go dumb hmm?” mocking you with a teasing lilt and a raised brow.
You pat at his swollen chest, it’s all you can manage to do, urgent to get him off you, give you a little space atleast. He only shoves himself in further, lips puckering to sloppily catch yours, saliva straying down your chin and jaw instead.
Your outright discomfort seems to get him going even more, thrusts increasing in increment despite becoming more careless, tip catching your clit when he slips out and hurries to stuff it back in.
When his face pinches up, brows tensed and nose furrowed, you can tell he’s going to cum, the friction between your bodies almost unbearable with the heat that suddenly envelops him.
A slew of curses are hissed out, casual vulgarity being one of Rafe’s favourite expressions of self, and then he’s pulling out and wrapping a fist around himself to paint your tummy white. Ropes shooting watery on your tummy and painting him a proud picture.
He shakes himself off on you a final time before tucking his wet dick back into his briefs, cleaning himself up entirely unbothered by the dissected mess of you laying drugged and fucked out on the bed.
“My head feels funny.”
“Yeah, that’s cause I fucked it out of whack.” He says it serious but you can imagine his upturned lips at his own sick sense of humour.
“Where are you going?” you sit up groggy, chest tight.
“Uhh, back downstairs, got some more yayo I needa lay off— you can stay here or.. wherever, doesn’t matter.”
He has the decency to shut the door fully when he leaves, yet you’re still alone and forced to lay in the waste of one of Rafe Cameron’s nights out.
#i love these thoughts thank u so much it’s never too much !!#i added on so much too i just love talking ab rape cameron 😬
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Bad Idea - Pt 1
Synopsis: Your step-brother is in debt to Rafe Cameron. Knowing he won’t be able to pay Rafe back, you step up. What a bad idea.
18+
Series content warning – smut (not yet), swearing, slow burn, depictions of aggression, jealousy, drug usage, violence, underage drinking
Chapter content warning – mentions of drug usage, violence
***
pt 2
Life sucks – that’s what your dad always used to say when you would complain about anything.
Something among the lines of: “Life sucks, kid. Get used to it.”
In response, you would argue with him that life was great and that he was just being negative. Your dad would always do the same thing once you began your argument with him. He would look at you with that same patronizing look, shake his head, pat the top of yours, and reply: “You’ll see.”
You did see.
You saw what he meant the day you realized that he wasn’t coming back from that fishing trip with his buddies.
You saw what he meant when your mom met someone new. You saw what he meant when she fell in love. You saw what he meant when they eventually got married.
You wanted to be happy for her, and you actually really liked the guy, but your mom moving on meant that you needed to as well. You couldn’t live in denial anymore. Your dad was never coming back. And even if he did, he wouldn’t actually be back. That man – your dad – would never really be your dad again.
You continued to see what your dad meant so many times in the next five years of your life after he left. You tried to not let the pessimism cloud you, but it was hard when your dad’s theory was consistently proving itself right.
Now, coming home from a double shift that was originally supposed to be a single, you couldn’t help but remember that very same sentiment.
Life fucking sucks.
You shut the car door, and made your way into the house. All you wanted to do was shower and go to bed. If only life were ever simple for you.
A loud crash from the backyard makes you snap your head over to where the noise came from. It was dark out, and despite living in a much wealthier area than you did five years ago, you still felt as unsafe as you did when you were living in that small house on the Cut.
You look towards the glass doors leading to the backyard. Hesitantly, and very stupidly, you took a step towards the noise.
“You dumb bitch,” you mumbled to yourself. “This is literally how you get yourself killed.”
As you got closer, you heard more noise – grunting, cursing. You almost turned back around to run up the stairs and lock yourself in your room, but you heard your step-brother cry out. All worries about personal safety were thrown out the window. You ran outside without thinking. The sight in front of you made you freeze up.
Your step-brother was pinned to the ground by Rafe Cameron. And he was getting the absolute shit beat out of him.
You felt your heart hammer in your chest. Rafe was from the wealthiest family in the Outer Banks. Kook king. Gets everything he wants. Drug addiction. Anger issues, to put it lightly. You had seen those anger issues be taken out several times from afar. Seeing it up close and personal made you feel overwhelming dread.
You decided to act first and think later. You ran at full force towards the kook, using all strength to shove him off your brother. Rafe stumbled a bit, not expecting anyone to interfere.
“What the hell, man?!” You yelled at him. You stood in front of your step-brother, trying to act like a shield.
Rafe stared at you, his chest heaving. He gave you a once over, but it was obvious he wasn’t really paying attention to you. “Go inside, pogue.” He waved his hand to dismiss you like you were nothing but a small nuisance to him.
You heard Carson on the ground behind you groaning in pain. You felt protectiveness swell in your chest. “The fuck are you doing?” You repeated with more force.
It was hard, but you kept eye contact with Rafe. You knew he was trying to intimidate you. You weren’t going to let it work.
“Carson and I were having a discussion.” Rafe gave a small shrug as if the answer was obvious.
You nearly laughed in anger. “A discussion?”
Rafe didn’t say anything, he only continued to stare at you. It remained clear to you that he expected you to do as he said and to just go inside.
To just go back inside and ignore the fact that someone you loved was getting hurt.
Fuck this guy.
You tilted your head up towards him defiantly. You said the first thing you could think of, despite how dumb it was. “Leave before I call the police.”
You heard Carson groan louder, obviously upset with your sentence. You ignored him.
Rafe laughed, taking a step closer to you threateningly. “You’re gonna call the cops on me?”
A prickle of fear hit your stomach as he began to close the distance. You held your arm out in front of you to stop him from getting any closer.
He stared at you like you were nothing. Like your threat meant nothing. To be fair, those things were probably true to him. Rafe Cameron had the means to get out of any situation. Even if you did actually call the police, you were sure that Rafe would get out of it without a scratch.
You did your best to keep your voice steady. “Leave.” You seethed.
Rafe brushed you off with a small shrug of his shoulders. “I’m not leaving until I get my money.”
That single sentence felt like a push the way it caught you off guard. You looked behind you to Carson, who had his eyes shut tightly in pain. You grimaced at the blood on his face. You turned your head back to Rafe hesitantly.
You watched him for a moment, hoping he would elaborate, but he just stared at you expectantly.
“...What money?” You asked.
Rafe started laughing, making you pull your eyebrows together. You hadn’t felt this confused in a long time, but you tried your best not to show it.
Rafe walked closer to you making you tense up, but he didn’t touch you. He looked over your shoulder to your step-brother, who was just now starting to get up.
“Oh, does she not know?” Rafe taunted. He pointed at you while talking to Carson as if you weren’t even there.
You looked between your brother and Rafe slowly, trying to fill in the blanks. Carson was completely tensed up. You eyed him carefully.
What did you not know?
“I told you. I’m getting your money–” Carson said, lowly.
Rafe shook his head, a deceiving smile on his face.
“Been hearing that for a week now, man. I want my money. Now.” Rafe tried to walk past you, but you stepped with him to prevent him from getting to Carson.
“What money?” You repeated. You tried to put more distance between yourself and Rafe. You didn’t like how close he had gotten.
“Your big brother over here,” Rafe gestured to Carson mockingly, “is a coke head. He’s late on his payments.”
Your lips parted in shock. You quickly shut your mouth, trying to seem unphased. “He’s the coke head here?” You shot back.
You heard Carson say your name in a warning tone. Yeah, it was probably a bad idea to rile up someone like Rafe, but you didn’t want him to think that he had the upper hand here. Even though he so clearly did.
Rafe clenched his jaw. “I’m getting my money one way or another. Either he coughs it up, or you can explain to your parents why their shit is missing.”
You shut your eyes, trying to remain calm. You let out a deep breath. “How much money does he owe you?”
You stood there in silence, waiting for Rafe’s answer. For a moment, all you could hear was Carson’s labored breathing.
“$750.”
Your eyes snapped open. This time you weren’t able to hide your reaction. Your head flew towards your brother in disbelief.
“Seven hund–?” You cut yourself off. Carson looked away, unable to meet your eye.
How the hell did he manage to spend that much? Carson didn’t even have a job. How was he planning on paying Rafe back? Was he going to steal it from his dad?
You shook your head to clear it from the questions flying in your mind. Those were going to have to be placed on the backburner. You did your best to focus on the pressing matter at hand.
Carson owed Rafe money. Carson did not have said money. Rafe was going to do whatever he needed to do to get what he was owed. You needed to step up.
You felt yourself getting distracted by your thoughts again. Why did Rafe need the money so bad anyway? Wasn’t his family millionaires or something? $750 had to be, like, pocket change or something to a guy like him.
You took a deep breath.
“I, um, I have, like $350 on me right now.” You pat your pockets for some reason as if the money wasn’t inside.
“YN, I can–” Your step-brother started.
“Shut up, Carson.” You snapped. You looked back at Rafe. “I’ll have more after work tomorrow.” You assured him.
Rafe shook his head, irritation on clear display. “I’m not waiting anymore–”
You looked at him sharply. “Well, you’re gonna have to.” Your tone was harsh, and it clearly caught Rafe off guard. He masked the shock quickly.
“I don’t know who you think you’re talking to, pogue, but it ain’t me.” He got in your face, and you tried your best to remain looking confident.
You didn’t feel confident, but maybe if you pretended like you were then eventually you would be for real.
“If you want your money,” You told him calmly while stepping towards him so that you were toe to toe. “Then you’re going to wait.” You flickered your eyes between his, trying to look stern.
Rafe stared at you for a few moments before an amused look graced his features. He looked away, laughing to himself. He nodded his head a couple times and looked back to you.
“You work at The Wreck?” He asked.
You were a little surprised that he knew this, but you didn’t dwell on it for too long. You nodded your head.
“Alright.” He smirked a bit, looking you up and down. He laughed to himself once more. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
He brushed his shoulder past yours as he made his exit from your backyard through the gate.
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath.
“YN, I’m so sorry–” You heard Carson speak up.
You held your hand up, cutting him off. “Just give me a minute.” You told him.
You walked towards your home and tried to control your breathing. Panic was fully setting in. You felt the coldness of it traveling through your veins.
Your step-brother was in debt to one of the most powerful people on the island.
Oh God, you thought. What were you going to do?
#rafe cameron#rafe obx#rafe x reader#rafe fanfiction#rafe outer banks#rafe#obx fic#obx#outer banks#rafe fic
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It's funny to see people asking about how to get the Shea "kiss scene" because they didn't get access to it at all when I actually had the option on mine, but picked the other romance choice there. I mean, obviously not mocking people who didn't get it, it's just the parallels and differences between playthroughs that are funny to observe.
Even in a moment of confusion, my MC could never be SO bold. The touching was already more than he'd ever dare to do under normal circumstances. It's interesting though, because I did hesitate between these options for a moment, but then came to the conlusion that with my MC's personality, he probably - at least subconsciously - would fear Shea would hate him way too much if he kissed them. I mean, he trusts Shea, but this is still a bold thing to do - even the touching is - and while he doesn't have issues with his human OR his barghest form like other helvlings could nor does he find himself like "disgusting" or anything, he still doesn't think he truly deserves Shea I'd say. He HAS been told ever since he woke up that he is basically worth nothing after all, and that he is the one who brought what happened onto himself because of what he did before - and even if he doesn't remember it, he actually believes that and just feels awful in that regard.
I'm always endlessly fascinated (and curious!) hearing about people's playthroughs. Obviously, I'm pushing a certain narrative when it comes to the helvling, and how they might perceive themself... so I'm not surprised when people tell me that their helvling wouldn't initiate contact, or that they wouldn't act in a certain manner (flirting and the like), or that they might be repulsed or have an aversion to touch (which makes sense, given the character's history).
I try to account for all sorts of playstyles, which is why I often add options in which other characters take the lead (touching or kissing, or speaking for the MC, for example). And I also completely get it if a reader would be uncomfortable kissing or touching Shea in that scene (whatever the reason), which is why it is not at all 'required' for any future scenes with them.
#well a lot of rambling to say that I don't really believe that there is a 'right' way to play#just different ones#and I hope to offer a realistic and gripping story that changes as you do so :-)#asks
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Jason Todd x South Asian!Reader HCs
requested | reader is fem, i tried to keep it non-specific so it applies to the whole region, not just india, hopefully i succeeded😬
i looooved writing this it was so much fun. drop an ask with anything else you want to see!!
When you show him Bollywood movies, at first he’s like “Why are these so damn long?” But watches them anyway because you’re so excited to show him
He obviously sobs at K3G (because he has daddy AND big brother issues)
But his favorite is probably 3 Idiots or Bhaag Milkha Bhaag (he just seems like the type to looove an underdog story am I right)
Since Jason likes cooking, he’s learning how to make all your favorite foods. He’s eaten a lot of Indian food before (duh, it’s New Jersey), so he’s familiar with the flavors and spices, but some dishes are easier than others. He tries to make dosa after you mentioned liking it but it does not go well
He’s trying so hard to impress you but they all keep breaking😭 and the ones that don’t break come out burnt. When he finally relents and lets you help him, you hold his hand and guide him to make the proper movements; pouring the batter, spreading it into a circle, and gently flipping it so it doesn’t break
He loves chai, and is always experimenting with different recipes and flavors and asking you to test them
You're taking him to the Indian market so often, by the end of the month he knows the names for all the vegetables and spices in your language and where to find them
He thinks you with mehendi/henna is the most attractive thing ever
Your friend’s getting married? Of course he’ll feed you while your mehendi’s drying, you don't even have to ask
When it's still fresh and at its darkest color he's actually going batshit insane (pun intended); he loves interlacing your fingers together and seeing the contrast of your dark, decorated fingers against his large, strong ones. His phone background is a selfie of you guys where your faces are squished side-by-side and one of your mehendi'd hands is cupping his cheek
And when you're on top of him, the sight of your adorned hands pressed flat against his bare chest, flushed and heaving...he thinks it belongs in a museum
He just loves doing little acts of service; one day you’re complaining offhandedly to him about how the price of eyebrow threading keeps going up, a week later you’ve forgotten all about it but he���s like “I learned how to thread your eyebrows”
He figured it would be easy enough, and as someone who’s life often depends on steady, surgical aim and precision, it is
Roy’s walking around looking messed up as fuck for a couple weeks but that’s beside the point because he’s got the hang of it now
When it comes to putting on a sari, he'll put the pins in the hard to reach places if you ask, but for the most part he just loves watching you put it on. he thinks it's so cute the way you scrunch your face in focus as you make the folds and tuck in the fabric with such concentration (Jason Todd domesticity agenda)
One night you're getting dressed up for some party, but no matter what you do and how many times you take it off and try to re-drape it, it just won't come out good and you get so frustrated and teary-eyed that he has to intervene
He makes you take a break, brings you a snack, and kisses you until you feel better, and then he pulls up a youtube video to do it for you— but he can't do it either😭
So you both decide to give up and you wear a lehenga instead
It’s a fairly modest one, and even though he's seen you wearing more-revealing clothes (and none at all), he's going crazy over that one inch sliver of exposed skin on your midriff
He already loves seeing you dressed up in traditional wear but if you put jasmine flowers in your hair with it??? The fragrance coming from you makes him feral. It lingers in your hair for a couple days and he can’t stop following you around and sniffing you LMAO
The first time you get a kurta for him, it’s actually impossible to find one that fits because he’s so big and buff (drool) so you just end up buying the fabric and getting it custom stitched
There's only a few scraps of the fabric left and you get the wonderful idea of braiding the scraps into a bracelet so you have something to match with him and it makes him go crazy
Early on in your relationship, you’re a little afraid to have oil in your hair in front of him because you’re worried he’ll think the smell is too strong
Jason is probably familiar with the practice of hair oiling from his time with Talia (but you don’t know that yet)
He actually LOVES when you oil your hair around him. Just something about him being the only one who gets to see you when you’re comfy and unready is so intimate to him and makes him feel so special and trusted and loved🥹
Time for some of my physical touch x touch starved!Jason propaganda
After a particularly difficult night of patrolling, he comes to you stressed and anxious and unsure what to do with himself. So you make him sit on the floor in front of your bed, warm up some of the oil, and seat yourself on the edge of the mattress. He leans back against your legs and you massage the warm oil into his scalp. It feels heavenly. You’re using the perfect amount of pressure, hitting all the right spots, and it feels so good he wants to cry. Later, when you pull him into the shower to shampoo it out, he actually does cry, hoping the water falling from the shower head hides the tears (it doesn’t, and it breaks your heart)
(If you were raised Hindu) I think he'd be very interested in the belief in reincarnation, past & future lives, oneness with the universe, etc...it might help him make some sense of his coming back
You bring mediation into his life, and that also really helps him
You wear Kajal/kohl/surma on your eyes, and whenever he’s looking especially good, or before he goes out as red hood, you smudge some onto your finger and put a mark behind his ear, just to be safe (it’s believed to deflect jealousy/bad intentions from others) (yes I’m superstitious sue me)
Or you just tie a black thread around his ankle
When you first explain to him that you want him to wear a black thread around his ankle because of a superstition, he thinks you’re joking. He can’t believe you actually believe in that
But he can’t say no to you and he secretly likes that you also have one so it feels like you’re matching
He considers it a good luck charm, not because he believes the superstition but because it’s from you
omg thank you for all the love on these<3 dick's will be posted tomorrow
#JT🫶#nightwing#batman#red hood#jason todd#dick grayson#jason todd x reader#jason todd x you#jason todd x y/n#batfamily#dc universe#dc comics#dcu#damian wayne#dc robin#robin#bruce wayne#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson x you#dick grayson x y/n
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im going to say something slightly mean which is that i think there is an imagined aspect of jayce and viktor's relationship that the audience is projecting onto them that actually is not supported by the text itself and that imagined facet is the reason people think their parting is rushed more than the issues with the actual show's pacing 💀
like i do think some of what jayce actually SAYS in that scene feels kind of clunky and unearned and sorta tropey, not because of who jayce is, but because it feels like they had to cut some interstitial tissue for the sake of time constraints, but even if they hadn't had to i cannot fathom that scene being extended more than like....a minute. like what kind of argument are they going to have that wasn't the one that actually transpired?
i think it's pointed that viktor is weirdly emotionally stunted and icy after he was such an impassioned person in s1 and he said everything there was to say anyway, just with a colder affect. i guess jayce could have said "hey viktor wait" like. one more time lol but in general if you take everything we have presented by the text on its face their immediate falling out could never have been that long a conversation because there isn't actually that much to argue about. jayce did what he thought was right and what is the normal human thing to do (broke his promise to save his friend that he loves and cares about) and viktor did not want him to do that. which is literally what they said to each other. very directly.
also it's like...supposed to be cold and sad. i don't think viktor is going to be the sole big bad of the show but i do think that the whole point of what we've seen so far in act i is that the arcane is inhuman and strange and kind of hard to understand and viktor has been partly absorbed into that and jayce is still very very human and full of all his hopes and ideals and therefore not able to grasp the arcane's true nature yet. a like. screaming lover's spat or whatever was not going to happen given the narrative positions that these two characters occupy. it doesn't even happen really between the two characters who are actually lovers — cait and vi have an somewhat equivalently long (so pretty short) moment of disagreement before cait hits vi in the stomach and leaves. anything else would have felt like fanfictiony and cheap imo
#and it's not like this is the one and only time they're ever going to talk???? like pls they will REVISIT this disagreement#jayce#viktor#s2 spoilers
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I have talked a couple of times about the huge parallels that exist between Hannigram (Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham, from the NBC show not the movie) and Haladriel (Galadriel and Sauron, The Rings of Power), and for me there are still the fictional relationships that are the closest in terms of narrative, despite the first being m/m and the second m/f. I have been told : Penny Dreadful, Vanessa and Dracula, but to be honest I found this relationship way too rushed, and totally ruined by the shitty ending of the show.
Besides, Dracula lied so much to Vanessa it was actually hard to say if his feelings for her were genuine or not. He had a nice speech though. Maybe on a second rewatch I'd have a different opinion, but it didn't really work for me. I didn't give a damn about this Dracula guy, while I do feel a lot for Hannibal and Sauron despite their undeniable evilness.
No, it's still Hannigram and Haladriel to me. The ships's names even both start with a H, isn't it a sign lol
Hannibal, Will, Galadriel, and Sauron are all very complex characters. Anyone who attempts to put these characters in a box and just see them as "entirely good" and "entirely evil" are, sorry, wrong.
Hannibal and Sauron get nowhere near to be redeemed in their story because they always commit to evil and feel unapologetic about it (Hannibal especially, while Sauron has a short "repentance phase". But since it's more motivated by the fear of the Valar's judgements than by a real, genuine desire to atone, he's easily drawn back to his old evil ways). They're both considered to be personifications of evil, for that matter.
Hannibal and Sauron are both capable of seeming extremely charming and deceive everybody who meets them into believing that they're "normal". I would say that Hannibal's an even better deceiver than Sauron is. They're also both control freaks who play 5D chess in real time. The rare times they lose control, it's almost always related to Will/Galadriel.
Hannibal and Sauron don't care about anybody and have no issues killing anyone who's in their way, except for Will/Galadriel.
Will and Galadriel are supposedly on "the good side", but in Hannibal and Sauron, respectively, they find the reflection of their own inner darkness.
Will and Galadriel are different from everybody else. They're respected in their respective field, but their differences make them loners, and seen as potentially dangerous by their peers.
Season 1 of both shows starts with exactly the same concept : Hannibal murders people and eats them, but for the world, including Will, he's just a respected psychiatrist. He befriends Will because he feels what Will would have probably always denied if he hadn't met him : that Will likes to kill, because it makes him feel powerful. Unlike Hannibal, he needs to feel that his victim "deserved" it, he won't just kill indifferently. Sauron pretends to be Halbrand, a regular mortal man, befriends Galadriel, and is drawn to her light but also to the darkness he can feel in her.
Hannibal is supposed to help Will find a murderer who's no other than himself. Halbrand is supposed to help Galadriel find Sauron, who's also no other than himself.
Both Hannigram and Haladriel have a clear push and pull dynamics through the seasons.
Will ends up realizing that Hannibal is the Chesapeake ripper, the murderer he was chasing, just like Galadriel finds out that Halbrand is Sauron at the end of season 1.
Will and Galadriel have an intense desire to kill Hannibal/Sauron, while being irresistibly drawn to him.
When he realizes that Will's close to find who he really is, Hannibal gets Will thrown in jail for the crimes he himself committed thanks to planted evidence and manipulation. Sauron somehow manages to instill the doubt in Elrond's head that Galadriel is not free of his influence, while manipulating Celebrimbor into believing that he was cast aside by her (and Gil-Galad) once they didn't need him anymore.
Hannibal acts all innocent when Will openly accuses him of being the Chesapeake ripper, just like Sauron plays innocent when referring to the fact that Galadriel cast him out once she found out who he was (the main difference is that Galadriel never accused Halbrand of being Sauron in front of Celebrimbor).
Talking of Elrond, I can see a parallel between him telling Galadriel "he (Sauron) never left" when she tells him she can't let him in again, and Bedelia du Maurier telling Will "Can't live with him, can't live without him, is that what this is?"
At the end of season 2, Hannibal stabs Will when he realizes he conspired with Jack Crawford to have him arrested (= he realizes he can't have Will even if Will is tempted). What do we get at the end of TROP S2 ? same thing, basically : Galadriel keeps on resisting him, so Sauron stabs her, literally leaving his mark (the wound) on her. In both cases, there's a clear erotic subtext.
In season 3, Hannibal tries to start a new life with a new partner, Bedelia du Maurier, but it doesn't work. He's visibly miserable and thinks about Will all the time. Sauron in season 2 does the same with Celebrimbor and a bit with Mirdania, who's basically a Galadriel stand-in. The partnership with Celebrimbor doesn't work as well as it did with Galadriel, and he's dead-eyed, most of the time.
Hannibal finally gets himself arrested so Will always knows where he is (in reaction to Will's claim that he never wants to think of him again, and doesn't want to know where he is). The parallel to that could be the bond that Sauron may have created between him and Galadriel, when he stabbed her with Morgoth's crown. Hannibal and Sauron both want to make sure that Will/Galadriel will never get rid of them.
Will finds himself a nice albeit quite bland wife, who's got a kid that Will treats as his own. I can't *not* see Molly as Will's Celeborn ;)
While being supposedly "happy" with his new quiet life, Will can't resist the temptation to leave this life to organize Hannibal's escape from jail, arguing that he can help him find another killer, the Red Dragon. It's quite obvious that at this point, Will just wants an excuse to spend time with Hannibal, as he has now fully embraced his "dark side". Season 3 ends with Will jumping off a cliff and dragging Hannibal with him in a desperate attempt to have them both killed.
I wouldn't be very surprised if we got a similar scenario in season 3 of TROP, especially if the theory that Galadriel and Sauron are now bound is revealed accurate... Maybe it's just wishful thinking, but it doesn't seem that far-fetched to me that Galadriel would still be attracted to Sauron in season 3.
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usually a/b/o aus start with tobirama being an omega but hiding it. society looks down on it, the senju especially, etc etc. but i think it would be interesting to go at it from the opposite perspective:
tobirama's an omega, and this is basically meaningless. They've all developed ways of handling the hormone issues, there's no strong prejudices against an omega as a shinobi, and the senju in particular are Totally Chill about everything because of their medical background. So tobirama isn't hiding it, and everyone knows, and it's no big deal.
Except for Izuna.
who's like- so normal, and progressive, usually, he's never cared about this sort of thing before. Hikaku's an omega and Izuna was the first to suggest he should still be a frontline fighter and the secondary heir, okay- he's not some old man with deeprooted prejudices blinding him!
Except every time he sees Tobirama on the battlefield he gets a deepseated sense that something is wrong. Tobirama should be at home!!! taking care of some kids or- or lounging around in a nest in preparation for his heat!!! he shouldn't be on the battlefield!! and then he tries to kill tobirama, because that's his job and obviously the man will kill a bunch of uchiha if he doesn't. He's got some weird shit going on in his head but he's not stupid.
It's izuna's private shame that he keeps entirely to himself, hoping eventually he'll squash the instinct into nothingness....until an uneasy truce is made between the Uchiha and Senju, they're meeting in public more often, and suddenly it's getting really hard for him to not just say something. Why is nobody giving up their seat so tobirama can sit down on something soft at the meeting????? why are all these alphas making intense eye contact with an unmated omega?????? why isnt anybody making sure he's eating enough when his heat is approaching??????? izuna can't actually say this stuff because it would make him sound the worlds oldest most out of touch grandpa, but he does act on it. if nobody else will give up their seat, he will. if he can't tell people off for the eye contact he can block their view. he's going to ply tobirama with so much food it's going to make him sick-
his behavior is obvious and deeply fucking embarrassing for everyone witnessing it. but tobirama thinks its funny so theres nothing anybody can do about it
#not really sure how to end this au i just think the premise is extremely funny#i think this is all even funnier if izuna is a beta not an alpha.
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S/O DATING THE CREEPYPASTAS *✧⁺˚⁺ପ(๑・ω・)੭ु⁾⁾
Author's note:
This was just supposed to be a #Rylan Rambles but u h I may have gone too far. So THIS IS MESSY SINCE I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE. so please don't expect anything good, I am good at art not story things.
T.w.:
for Eyeless Jack's part is cannibalism ofc
Jeff the killer
Jeff's type is very motherly like he loves a partner who's sweet but will basically drag him by the ear and lecture him for being a bitch. he is loving and sweet in his own way BUT you do have to have thick skin. at least for a while. he'll be throwing every insult in the book at you trying to get you away from him. he is scared of being vulnerable. So as he figures out his emotions it'll definitely be rough for a while and if you play into the "bit" and insulting him back, HE'D BE BLUSHING thinking you know how he feels. Be prepared since that'll be you two's love language! But for anyone who wants a relationship with this man there will definitely be some obstacles with him not being able to properly communicate his emotions in a healthy manner, his anger issues, the fact that this is probably his first ever relationship so it'll be rocky no matter what you do. But when you get over those obstacles and you are still there holding his hand with a smile you'll have a boyfriend FOR LIFE. Also become a sweetheart for those who love the idea of Jeff being soft to his partner.
Eyeless jack
His type to me personally is someone who treats him like he is a normal human being. That's it that's the one thing that'll make him fall head over heels in LOVE with you. But bonus points if you like to crack jokes and puns those ALWAYS make him laugh! He is a simple demon. However, THIS relationship is very much a MESS for at least the first half of it, you're in a relationship with a giant fluffy demon who eats human flesh did you expect it to be normal? This relationship is definitely a game of tug of war of him wanting to basically make you his dinner and wanting to keep you around because he loves you. You'd have to walk a really thin line to make sure this demon doesn't take one of your kidneys. But after a LONG while he'd start to actually act normal for the MOST part. Listen, I love to imagine this guy to be VERY creaturely. you know this if you have seen my design of him after a one or two years of being around you and not eating you; he leave a corpse (whether it's human or animal up to you) at your door like it's some gift from one giant cat.
Tim Wright/Masky
Tim/Masky's type is very "wife"-like if that makes sense (I headcanon him to be Bi-romantic Ace-spec so gender doesn't matter) like Tim to me loves the idea of having the white picit fence dream! it lets him feel like he's normal even for abit. Loves the idea of coming home from work to hug his partner from behind as he watches them cook dinner. Very domestic very demure. To most he's a pretty rough guy considering Masky but to me he's definitely a softy. compliment him and he'll be putty in your hands. 10/10 would 10000% smooch. But you two definitely sometimes have some trouble especially when Masky takes over. With that one YOU WILL N O T be able to sleep. every time you try to sleep be prepared to be shaken awake because masky finds it funny to startle you awake.
Brian Thomas/Hoodie
Listen we had Tim now we gotta do Brian, THEY ARE TWO PEAS IN A BOD YALL👏. His type to me personally is just a funny good vibes person, who loves being on the go and not in one place for too long. Now, this relationship is basically MADE OUT OF POSITIVE VIBES. Brian to me is definitely the type to praise his partner AT ALL HOURS OF THE DAY he is a absolute sweetheart. You'd also definitely love him if you like nature walks and hikes. You definitely had to be the first to confess though because if you didn't this situation would definitely be just mutual pining. Also definitely the type to always be following behind his partner since I like to think bro is a TALL man, he wants you to see whats Infront of you and not block the way. His nickname for his partner something nature relationship "duckling" "lil mushroom" "sunshine" or something similar!
#headcanon#headcannons#creepypasta#creepypasta headcanon#rylan rambles#jeff the killer headcanons#jeffery woods#jeff the killer creepypasta#tim marble hornets#tim masky#creepypasta masky#masky marble hornets#mh masky#mh hoody#hoody marble hornets#hoody creepypasta#brian thomas#eyeless jack creepypasta#eyeless jack#eyeless jack x reader#tim wright x reader#jeff the killer x reader#brian thomas x reader
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As a Max fan, I do admit that Max isn't perfect and I absolutely adored Lando before especially with his friendship with Max and Carlos. Lando is getting hated mainly because of the things he says and some of his actions. One was the trump thing, second, was when Max was congratulating him and he decided to snitch despite the race being over (not a big issue for me personally cause all drivers snitch). Third is the way he acted when he won the Dutch GP especially when he decided to use Max's catchphrase (I know it wasn't Max's before), most of us found it rude especially since well max's catchphrase and Lando saying that seemed as if he was mocking Max and the worst thing was it was Max's home race. Fourth, the cooldown with Lewis when Lew was merely being nice and he decided to somewhat insult him (I feel insulted despite Lewis saying it was fine). Fifth, When he called Max's win in Brazil luck not talent, I mean luck was a part of it but talent had a much larger contribution. Sixth, when McLaren fucked up and he made his engineer beg for Lando to give the place back to Oscar despite him being only there because McLaren fucked up and Iscar was doing an excellent job defending (Fuck Mclaren strategy tbh). Seventh, podium in Hungary ('twas fucked up) Oscar couldn't even enjoy his win because Lando was the center of attention despite Osc having a phenomenal drive. Eight, when Oscar had to give up a win (it was a sprint but it was still a win) just for him to lose big time from Max. Ninth, when Oscar once again had to back off to give Lando a chance to catch up to Max but he couldn't pass Charles. Tenth, this is mostly due to how the FIA has been acting. They have been acting like a knight and shining armor for Lando, especially during the quali. This is not hate, I do think he is a contender for this season, the way he's been acting is somewhat the problem. (I think I have more but this is enough lmao)
there's a lot to be covered here so i'll answer the ones that caught my eye.
3) now that i've thought about it, i'd understand why max fans in particular would be mad about it. max coined the phrase, his friend essentially used it to take a dig at him. me personally, if this is what you're getting so seriously pressed about then i actually don't know what to say. this is a sport, shithousery will ensue between friends, enemies, acquaintances— everybody. it's not like lando completely ridiculed and encouraged any more hate towards max; i don't know if i can say the same for max, though.
4) that one i felt taken aback by it too. don't know why he said that, it's definitely something he could've avoided saying. but if lewis isn't bothered about it, i'm not going to be. if he was, i certainly would be and will hold lando accountable (i still do anyways)
5) this is so palpably hearsay and i cannot believe you still think this. at this point, i feel like a broken radio trying to reason with you guys and tell you that that is not what he meant. i'm sure you've come across people explaining what the actual meaning is, so let's not sit here and still believe this foolishness. if, for some reason, you still don't get it, there's a post here that explains it perfectly.
6 and 7) you are talking all about unrightful lando wins, but didn't lando have to give his place up for oscar? oscar didn't overtake lando by his own will and win, so why won't we use that against oscar? some people do, but we all know it was mclaren's fault for putting them in that position. they could've easily let them stay where they are and fight for p1, but they didn't and that is how it panned out. after them guilt tripping lando into giving the place back, are we still blaming lando for this? i know you shouldn't be because as you said, 'fuck mclaren strategy'.
8) mclaren were seemingly championship contending... up until they claimed they weren't after the brazil gp (honestly, odds were stacking up against them that they weren't because they kept fucking up more than they should've). i can tell you are either quite ignorant or haven't been a fan for long, because it seems you are too used to someone winning the championship by their own merit because of the very pitiful gap in performance between the red bull drivers, but forget that many championships have been won with the help of teammates, one of the most infamous being lewis and valterri. oscar giving up his place was to help lando (who's higher in the standings between the 2) get more points and close the gap. it wasn't a rightful sprint win, we are all aware, but that's how this sport works.
10) i was going to go hell on this take, but @landhoe-norris worded it perfectly in their post:
"Imagine thinking that an organisation that rigged a race so that your favourite drivers would win a championship, an organisation that has allowed him to run other drivers off the track for the past three years without repercussions, is now being biased against him because he ‘has the wrong passport’ when in all seriousness your favourite driver is the epitome of ‘white privilege’ and has been since he stepped into the sport."
there's nothing more for me to say.
all in all, lando is not as bad as you guys make him out to be. if anything, max, in my opinion, is worse. and looks like he'll always be.
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The basic dynamics of Hirano and Kagiura's relationship
First of all, I don't like comparing the two because they both fall into the spectrum of ideal romance and the other into complicated romance, But just to make things clear, Sasaki To Miyano is more genuine and romantic while Hirano To Kagiura is more on the complicated side discuss identity crisis where hirano is dealing with his self issues and Kagiura deals with his concept of love Unlike Sasamiya where everything was perfect, friendship, admiration, feelings, time to give a proper answer, mutual feelings
But I will use this in some paradoxes between natural and complex relationships to illustrate some points, fair enough
1. Kagiura's personality is the fastest to develop in this relationship. He just loves his roommate, trying to make sure of his feelings, but thanks to his friend's support, he determined his proper definition of love. Of course, a large part of him is inclined towards his parents' relationship* and as I mentioned before His desire to feel Hirano's feelings for him turned into a physical desire because he couldn't get the look he wanted from Hirano's eyes.
* With that said, I want to touch on this point since this is one of the ways the manga shows how childish Kagiura is, it's something where you ask a child what they want to do when they grow up and they'll tell you they want to be like their mom or dad
I actually asked one of the kids in the family a couple of days ago what she wanted her partner to be like when she grew up, and her response was simple "a kind and a caring person." (You can pull any child near you and they will give you the same answer).
Isn't that exactly what Kagi loves about Hirano? (I mean I know this is a natural trait of the person you love but usually it is not only this, I hope this makes sense) What I'm trying to explain here is how Kagiura is always referred to as a child
Not only that, but Hirano's rejection of him activated the stubborn (and seemingly childish) feeling inside him. Hirano had already rejected him twice (9 - 23.5) But he was vehemently denying it, confident that Hirano would "REALIZE HIS FEELINS" and not "give up." (Because I used to see a lot of people saying that Kagiura is forcing Hirano)
As I mentioned before, this is blind optimism.
Unlike Sasaki, who didn't think he had much hope, and in the time he gave Miyano to think, he was happy that Miyano was thinking of him and didn't want anything else, and even if he had rejected him I'm sure everything would have stayed the same and he wouldn't ask Miya to think again at any chance He was really grateful to have Miano in his life, just it
2. Move to Hirano who The one on his side of the relationship is much slower and also late, since this was the first time he experienced something like this, he had no one to confess to, he had no one to love, and he had never been in a relationship before, Hirano struggles to define and understand love itself, He is not looking for a clear concept, he is trying to find a concept
He had never thought about it before, and it seemed to him that everything he did to Kagiura, from pampering and loving, was a natural act, as he was searching for a sense of responsibility throughout the story.
He was the only child of his parents, intellectually intelligent, but socially stupid, qualities that formed fertile ground for the desire to feel responsible.
We can see how he is a supporting character in the main manga like Hanazawa, but unlike Hanazawa who was driven by anxiety, Hirano was driven by responsibility.
Every time Kagiura gets close to Hirano physically and Hirano doesn't move, it's not that Hirano wants Kagiura to get closer, it's not that Hirano trusts Kagiura not to get closer, but it's already made clear that Hirano doesn't mind Kagiura touching him, it's just that he doesn't understand what this should mean, it's not that he doesn't want to or that he wants to, he just stands helpless not understanding (The thing is, in chapter 20, he was just surprised, but he wasn't bothered by it)
Unlike Sasaki and Miyano, there was a boundary and a line between the contact between them and Sasami's feelings.
The most likely idea for me is that Hirano is slow to understand his feelings because he is trying to understand Kagiura and has never tried to understand himself.
#I hope this was fun and helpful to read because I really enjoyed writing this and it took me some good time to sort things out#My psychology professor complimented me a lot today#Yes#I analyze gay characters ma'am#hirano to kagiura#hirano and kagiura#sasaki to miyano#kagiura akira#hirano taiga#sasamiya
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I think it'd be funny if Saruhiko was that all bark but no bite kinda person in bed? Like, imagine he just keeps making fun of Yata for being a virgin but when they finally DO begin fucking Saruhiko is the first one panting and exasperated.
May or may not be because he didn't exactly grasp the concept of feelings in a romantic and sexual relationship before so it sounded more easy said than done.
. As someone who firmly believes that for all his talk Fushimi is also a virgin, I fully enjoy this idea. I can absolutely see Fushimi as someone who has like grasped the general idea of sex and doesn’t see the big deal about it, like okay it’s supposed to feel good and presumably there’s sweating and fluids everywhere which sounds uncomfortable but otherwise not a big deal. He enjoys teasing Yata for being a virgin because Fushimi doesn’t see anything to be embarrassed about when it comes to talking about sex, it’s just bodies after all, and seeing Yata get all blushy and stuttering is funny. For a long time Fushimi also probably assumed sex was something not relevant to his life anyway — Fushimi strikes me very much as someone who wouldn’t want to be touched by a person he doesn’t have any kind of connection with (in one of the Gakuen K drama CDs he even refuses the hot springs because other people have bathed in them) and considering his nonexistent levels of self esteem I can see Fushimi treating sex as something he’s looking at from the outside, he doesn’t need to be embarrassed by it because it’s simply not something he will ever have to deal with.
Then he and Yata hook up and now sex is suddenly an actual thing that he has to contend with. I imagine the first time he and Yata get up the courage to actually put their hands in each other’s pants, Fushimi is just teasing Yata for his red face but at the same time Fushimi has like no stamina at all and doesn’t even manage to outlast Yata. And then when they start actually having full on penetrative sex and suddenly Fushimi is all panting and barely able to speak, red-faced and clumsy and getting really annoyed that sex wasn’t as easy as it sounded when he read about it online. I also imagine after their very first time especially Fushimi just having a moment afterward as the sheer emotion and intimacy of what they just did hits him, like it’s very easy to think of sex as a thing bodies do and an entirely different thing to process the emotions behind it especially since you know Yata was being all loving and honest throughout the whole thing. That’s probably even harder for Fushimi than the act itself — he can handle being touched by Yata and when they’re both all frenzied and horny it’s fine, but when things become slower and more passionate and intimate and now suddenly Fushimi’s having to face stark naked emotion and that’s just entirely new territory for him. (None of this stops him from teasing Yata about being a virgin though, which Yata finds totally exasperating especially when Fushimi says it while they are actively in the middle of having sex.)
#sarumi#Talking K#I fully believe Fushimi is just as inexperienced as Yata#it's just that he can handle talking about it better#but the actual act would be just as much of an issue for him#imagine him all exhausted and panting and Yata's just very amused
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*emerges from the fog* have you heard of my boy called sideswipe he suffers from little bitch syndrome and unresolved trauma he refuses to talk about
I also think he’s aroace—*gets shot*
#LOOK I KNOW HE ACTS LIKE THE STRAIGHTEST GUY EVER BUT HEAR ME OUT—#he never actually shows romantic interest in anyone in the show#‘but windblade—’ he acts towards her the same way he acted towards jazz when he showed up they just form an actual friendship out of it#‘but strongarm—’ besties have you ever hear of having friends#‘but blurr—’ BESTIES HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF HAVING FRIENDS#anyways I really wished we actually got a backstory for him like why tf did he hate autobots so much in the beginning??#why is he such a troubled kid???? they hint towards him having abandonment issues and then never bring it up again like HUH?!?!#and I wouldn’t be annoyed if it wasn’t for the fact that we have a canonical backstory FOR EVERY OTHER CHARACTER OF THE MAIN CAST#we have episodes about strongarm’s days in the academy#we have 1 episode about drift’s time as deadlock and how he found his kids#we figure out what happened to fixit and the rest of his kind at the end of season 2#the only other character like this is grimlock but even then we at least have an EXPLANATION of why he is the way he is—#—being an ex-decepticon that was never really evil but just liked fighting for fun#meanwhile we have NO EXPLANATION for why sideswipe is the way he is AT ALL#he might as well have just popped out of cybertron a hater at birth and he technically would be the same as he is in-show#BUT THEN WE HAVE THE HINTS TOWARDS HIS ISSUES AND I JUST💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥#anyways can you tell that i’m Normal about him#rid 15#rid 2015#rid15#rid2015#tf rid 2015#tf rid15#transformers rid2015#transformers robots in disguise#robots in disguise 2015#rid sideswipe#rid jetstorm
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Thinking about step 9 and the whole concept of forgiveness of one’s self and others and it bringing healing and how bobby and Eddie have been paralleled a fair amount and the idea that Eddie started this process back at the end of s5 with his forgiveness and acceptance of his father but how he hasn’t yet gone anywhere near his mother and their relationship .
How his catholic guilt storyline seems more likely to play on his reltionship with his mother than his father (if his father wasn’t around that much it would’ve been Helena taking him to church etc each week) so the idea of an Eddie - Helena storyline that plays on catholic guilt and potentially his queerness in relation to that has me chewing on glass - it could be so epically good
#I’ve always viewed Helena as the biggest issue in Eddie’s relationship with his parents - Ramon has always - to me a least always seemed to#just go along with what Helena wants or dictates#it made sense with how his trauma ptsd army related arc played out that it was Ramon who was the centre of that#now though - catholic guilt - possibly playing into his queerness and suppression of that queerness#to keep some kind of reltionship with his mother - who only seems to view him through a lens of failure#leading him down a road where he wasn’t able to be his true self - it would be so powerful#there is so much potential there#eddie saying his mother wasn’t an issue in s6 - was such a choice and so pointed that they have to be wanting to explore that#so many aspects of who Eddie is and why he is the way he is - his want to nest but not being able to with women - stems from his mommy#issues and the fact he’s been denying they exist#I will eat it up - it would be the right kind of angst for the show and Ryan would deliver#plus the way it parallels with Bobby and his relationship with Catholicism would be fascinating#not to mention the whole Eddie not having a relationship with the faith he was brought up in only to start dating someone who is a literal#embodiment of that faith - and female - as a symbol of his needing to explore and reconcile the actual reasons for his faith lapsing- become#could not be queer and Latino and catholic when Eddie was growing up - it wasn’t an option - so if you step away from the faith that’s#denying a fundamental aspect of who you are#even if you still can’t act upon it - it is easier to keep that part of you concealed#911 spoilers#911 Thinky thoughts#eddie diaz#I need this arc to be a thing so badly#911 abc
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feeling completely insane about The Author And His Protagonist™️ this morning and now I'm thinking about bingqiu too, and like. Airplane of course wrote Luo Binghe to be everything he wasn't, this cool and powerful stallion protagonist. And he also wrote him to be what the readers wanted, especially as time went on. But there's bit of himself embedded in Binghe -- his insecurities, his fear of abandonment, his loneliness, his hunger for love. Those vulnerabilities are hidden away under layers of strength and stallion badassery in PIDW, but for Bingmei, they're laid bare and ratcheted up to eleven
And then Shen Yuan. He of course loved Luo Binghe The Protagonist™️ but he fell in love with Luo Binghe, the real person with insecurities and fears and strange ugly edges to his personality. He saw this carnival mirror reflection of Airplane's flaws, and he wanted nothing more than to wrap Binghe up and love him and care for him and soothe those insecurities
If I was Airplane, bingqiu would be like therapy for me
#svsss#THEYRE SO!! AUGH!!!!!!!!#i don't think airplane thinks about this. i think he actively avoids thinking about it actually#but like!!!! what am i supposed to do with this#airplane's family kinda tossed him to the side and he didnt have friends and he certainly didnt have any romantic prospects#and he wrote this character that was for the readers but was also kinda for him#he wrote a man who was so desperate for love but had been hurt so much that he couldnt let himself be vulnerable for it#and then shen yuan scoops that protagonist up and loves him so much that it changes everything#plot insanity aside. just look at how bingqiu has turned out by the end#binghe worries about being pushy/clingy so he withdraws and sqq pouts because he WANTS him to be pushy and clingy#binghe acts pathetic and weepy to beg for attention and sqq is utterly indulgent about it#he loves him in basically every way you can love a person. as a lover as a best friend as family#and it's BECAUSE he's seen all these insecure and vulnerable and ugly sides to him#if i was airplane and saw someone love a proxy for my insecurities with that much intensity it would be more potent than any antidepressant#sqq: loves the pathetic and needy and intense reflection of sqh's issues so much he'd let it kill him#sqh: i think i hauve covid#god. that's enough tags for now.#i put a version of this in clover's dms but i needed to post it too
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