#but she's scared shitless; the poor child

[dawndelion-winery]

Thanks for the Flowers

You send them a little prank thank you text with flowers they never sent

Ft: Alhaitham, Arlechinno, Childe, Scaramouche, Wriothesley

Alhaitham:

You thought it would be a funny prank to send him a stock image of flowers and a small thank you

"Glad you like them."

He smiles to himself, but then immediately deleted his message when he sees the attached image

That wasn't the bouquet he sent

His smile drops so fast because who exactly is sending you flowers apart from him?

"Throw those out, they aren't from me. Don't you like the one I sent more? I got your favourites, my love."

He gives the house a cursory scan the moment he steps in through the front door

It's only after you've given him his welcome home kiss and a hug that he starts looking for the bouquet for some trace of who the sender might be

At first he doesn't believe you when you say it's a prank because he wouldn't put it past you to just want to allay his worries

He'll come around though, and then he's annoyed

"That's childish and you know it, you can have my attention if you just ask for it."

Arlechinno:

This is her sign to publicly announce that you're with her because this sort of idiocy wouldn't be an issue if people knew you were spoken for

Initially chuckles to herself as she glares at the offending image

"Do you like them?"

Of course she's not telling you the weren't from her if you like them

The poor sucker who sent them to you deserves no credit anyway

If anything, they deserve her personal thanks for helping her gift you something!

Of course she needs to know their name and face to express her gratitude in person <33

In a totally genuine and non-threatening way (lie)

She ends up coming home late that day, having scared off any of your potential suitors just to be safe

"Had some unsavoury business come up, dearest, sorry to keep you waiting. Have you had dinner yet? No? Shall we dine together?"

She never brings it up though, so you sorta forget to ever tell her it was a joke

Childe:

At first he doesn't process that he didn't send you the flowers

It's not like he doesn't pay attention, but he has his subordinates send you so much stuff as he comes across it that it's really hard to keep track

For all he knows it might have been something he came across and spontaneously thought of you liking it

And your likes were pretty much needs to him

"Love you, my pookie <33"

And then he stows his phone away

Only to remember he hasn't gotten you any flowers that day

"My honey drumlet darling-kins, there doesn't happen to be a note attached to the flowers, is there?"

When you insist that no, there isn't, and you've checked thoroughly, he makes a mental note to look into anyone who's ever had a crush on you

For a friendly spar, of course!

He just needs to make sure his competition is even worth noting (they aren't)

He comes home, thoroughly disappointed that none of them could even hold their own against him - few even dared to try, scared shitless by the sudden appearance of a harbinger demanding they fight

Sweaty and tired, he's all over you, whining about his day and how everyone wants you and can't take a hint that you're so happy with him ("You are, aren't you? I'm your favourite.")

Of course you cave and tell him it was only a prank

He scowls at first, but then breaks out giggling as he buried his face in the crook of your neck

"It doesn't really matter because I think they're all scared of me anyway. Some of them took one look at me and blanched. Unlike you, of course; the sight of me excites you, doesn't it?"

Ah. There's your bastard ginger.

Scaramouche:

"Wrong number, I think you meant to text your side hoe."

Sends you the most unbothered replies

Is actually overthinking

He knows logically this is most likely a joke because he swears he has seen that bouquet somewhere on the internet when looking for flower arrangement inspiration

But what if it's just a really similar layout and someone actually did send it to you?

Horrible. He doesn't want to think about it

But of course he does anyway

Brings you flowers because he planned to sneakily replace the stranger's bouquet

Wriothesley:

"Honey, please tell me this is a joke."

Seething inside

Who in their right mind dared to covet you while you were happily dating him??

Don't even try evade his interrogation, he needs to know every detail

From the exact time the flowers were sent to the arrangement and paper quality

Don't mind him, it's just a small investigation he'll carry out in his free time

The sooner you come clean the better

Not that you'll go unpunished...but hey, confessing to your crimes must at least lighten the sentence, yeah?

Taglist: @ryuryuryuyurboat @yinyinggie @mx-kamisato @chaosinanutshell @haliyarobin @irethepotato @boundedbyfate @favonius-captain @aqui-soba @tiredsleep @sadlonelybagel @mastering-procrastinating @lemeowade

[crypt-keepers-den]

I need more of Astarion and his little spawns- You don't understand how much I fucking loved that fic, PLEASE WE NEED MORE DADDY STARION 😭😭😭

I DIED BUT NOW IM BACK ENJOY!

𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬 (𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐧)

Astarion never claimed he'd be a good father, but as soon as your little ones arrived into the world he sure was the proudest. When Lyra, your oldest had been born he fainted (can vampires faint idk), and when you announced your pregnancy with your youngest, Caspian, he was elated and told anyone who'd listen that his darling was blessing him with a second child.

when your oldest was born he was too frightened to hold her, in fear that he'd hurt her, but after a long talk from you (and a stern talking from halsin who'd offered to help you deliver naturally) he did hold her, frozen in place however as he did so. "she's perfect my darling" soft silvery tears cascading down his pale cheeks as the new-born yawns, when your youngest was born, he was prepared this time, holding your hand with confidence as you brought a new life into the world, bringing your 1yr old daughter into the bedroom to meet her baby brother, the elf had a grin etched on his face.

becoming a parent is one thing, but a parent to a dhampir baby is another, when lyra started teething you found out the harsh way. One evening you had lifted the infant to breastfeed her, settling back down on the couch with the infant nestled to your chest as she contently latched, your adoring husband sitting next to you a book in hand, his free hand stroking the top of his daughter's head. "star, read that page again i was too focused on lyra" he nods starting again until he heard a sudden yelp from you, "my love whatever's wrong?" he watches you exam the giggling baby's mouth "holy Avernus, star she's got fangs!" his eyes widened at your discovering as he leans over to see what your talking about, your holding the drooling baby's mouth open to allow him to see the two little white points that had pierced through lyra's gum. His eyes widen now understanding what had happened causing him to laugh, earning him a rough slap to the shoulder and a stern glare. safe to say you switched from breastfeeding to bottle and continued to do so with your second born (not that it helped but it saved your poor breasts from being gummed on by your children atleast).

Astarion prided himself in his inability to say 'no' to his children, "papa can i has?" caspian stares up at his father with the same puppy dog eyes you use on him, "caspian no treats before dinner!" you'd call out, the little boy would then pout before looking back up at his daddy, "papa a'peas", oh dear your son has him in the palm of his chubby little hands, astarion cant remember his childhood anymore, nothing but faint smells of what he assumes is his mother's perfume, but he does remember having nothing when he was under cazadors control. And he had made a promise at each child's birth, they'd never suffer like he had and they'd want for nothing. in this scenario its astarion sneaking your son a cookie before dinner, the pair hiding under the kitchen table laughing "our little secret little starling" , "you two know i can see you right?" "quick run!". with choas ensueing as you chastise the pair for ruining their appetite for dinner.

"lyra please stopping scaring your brother with your bat form!", the first time your daughter had found out she could shift scared you shitless, toddler lyra suddenly poofing into a bat mid hiccup causing you and astarion to jump out of your skin, not knowing how to get lyra to turn back until she hiccups again poofing back and landing in a panicked astarion's arms while giggling at her parents panicked faces. Since then astarion had taught her how to use it properly, however she had a terrible habit of scaring her little brother with it, startling the tot causing him to wail and run to the nearest parent crying "a bwat!, a mama! a papa! noo!" earning lyra a scolding, you and astarion made her promise to not use her abilities in the cottage and not infront of her brother, not until he was a little older anyway.

(hey! im back with some dadstarion stuff! how are we all liking this? i could go on forever about dadstarion scenarios, what would you like to see?)

[rookiesbookies]

Pregnant brat reader here with a sfw req this time with the same cod men from before bc that was scrumptious

The men are in the nursery, cradling their newborn to soothe them. Reader walks behind them, kissing their cheek (or wherever she can reach) and she whispers “I just fell in love with you all over again.”

Can you tell I have severe baby fever atm

Oh its ok I get baby fever too. If I wasn’t still too young and trying to get a degree first, oh boy. I also get it every time I look at Neil Ellice’s face (Soap’s va/reference).

Lowkey you’re making me fall more in love with these boys, hope this is all you hoped for my loving anon.

To all my readers and anons- Keep requesting this account is my hobby LMAO

Price

Price is already softly crying but now you’ve made this man want to sob. He puts the baby down since it’s late, poor thing basically just got cleared to go home.

He kneels by the crib, finger still in the baby’s grasp as it sleeps and Price is just done for. He’s doing everything possible not to wake this baby. He’s so grateful he got this chance, and he’s not going to waste it.

Now Price is going to need soothing because his heart can’t take this moment. His hand is over his mouth to help him choke down sobs. Just you and him and now the kid he always dreamed of? He’s going to be the best dad and there’s nothing that can stop him.

Soap

It’s crazy how forgetting to put on a condom once can change your whole life.

He immediately plants a kiss back on your head, telling you to go get rest. He’s going to spend the first months of this baby’s life sleeping in the room with it. The faintest cry or struggle has him up. He’s already got it all planned.

Never going to make this life feel like an accident, no this child is an accomplishment of good sex and a wonderful choice to keep it. Maybe it wasn’t an accident after all, maybe it was meant to be.

He mumbles all kinds of thanks to the universe. He’s already named Simon and the rest of the 141 the godfathers, he couldn’t stop making mafia jokes. But now he has no jokes or witty comments, just love for his wife and his baby.

Ghost

Simon is scared shitless.

He lost his last family, he can’t lose this one too. He’s already updated the house’s security. But maybe he should upgrade it more. There’s so much more he can do, he can feel his heart rate rising.

He mumbled endless promises of safety. You have to remind him the live in the moment, that those are all things that he can do tomorrow.

Thats when he starts to get emotional. You can see it in how he squints before he pulled off his baklava.

This is one of two days that’s proven Simon Riley still exists somewhere in Ghost. This proves that Simon Riley didn’t die. This proves what Price told you when you married him, that Ghost was a fortress built to protect Simon.

Gaz

He’s been crying since the baby was born. It’s not sobs but to him this child is the ultimate testimony of your love. Of your marriage even. He still doesn’t believe it. His world now revolves around this baby.

He still doesn’t believe its his child. Sure it looks like him but would an angel like you truly grace him with this? After all the terrible things he’s done and seen in the midst of battle?

He plants a kiss right back, running his thumb over the cheek of the baby. He knows he has to put it to bed but can't he hold his kid a little longer?

He may just stay here, just for one night. Just with his kid. He has so many stories to tell. He has to introduce the baby to his team and his family.

He knows he has to wait, but he cant help it.

Konig

He still doesn’t believe it. His anxiety tells him it’s a trap set by the enemy, that he couldn’t be loved, that a woman wouldn’t want to have his offspring.

But that all melts away when he turns to see you. He’s holding a baby he was surprised your body could push out, he knows this child is his without a doubt because of its sheer size and weight.

He places fluttering kisses all over your face.

He mentions keeping the baby in your shared room, just so he can keep an eye on it he swears. Oh he promises it won’t disturb you he swears.

It wasn’t even an option to tell him no, he was already carrying the baby in on arm with a secure hold and the crib in another. He hasn’t taken his eyes off your baby for even a second and getting him to sleep will be another struggle.

Krueger

Sebastian isn’t crying, you’re crying. What do you mean there’s tears coming down his face? No, that's sweat, it’s really warm.

He never needed you to tell him you loved him at the start, but when you started to he realized his heart wasn’t made of stone after all.

Now he’s holding this little creature thats half you and half him and he’s just breaking down.

This is a second chance at life for him and he swears he’s going to do better than he started off with.

In your eyes, this murderer looks like an angel with the light seeping softly through the windows against him as he holds your sweet baby.

For the first time in a long time, he prays. He prays to not mess up and for protection for his family. Its soft, under his breath and you would barely hear it, but he prays.

Keegan

When the baby was born the whole team of ghosts showed up. It was a moment of pride.

He turns to kiss your lips right back as he walks over to the rocking chair. Oh he could get the baby a little mask and armor. Could be a mini ghost.

The team fell straight in love but none could love this baby more than Keegan.

And how he looks at you? Its like you hung the stars… which you did help him do, there’s lots of stars hanging from the nursery ceiling, but you gave him a baby. He would trade the sun for his little family, unafraid of turning nocturnal if it meant keeping this moment.

He mumbled about this meaning worth all the fighting. Promises to always come home falling from his mouth so easily.

Edit: im dropping this incase you havent seen it tol

Masterlist is pinned on profile as always, don’t forget to leave me a comment or a request in my inbox to let me know what yall want to see!

[the-s1lly-corner]

I got an idea from the child reader request.

Like the same wolf in sheep's clothing concept but like FULL SWEET TO DARK PERSONALITY.

Wanna hear?

So basically child reader is like cute and innocent at first sight but IS A TOTAL DEMON, Having a very dark sense of humor, Sometimes out of nowhere walk up to someone of the gang and threaten to gouge out their eyes while they sleep, they are always with an cute expression but turns out that they like to cause chaos and havoc just like Jax but in a more creepy way.

For example, SOMEHOW reader is caught hanging from the ceilling scaring the fuck out of gangle just because its fun. Or staying in the dark waiting for someone so they can jumpscare them.

Basically child reader uses their cute-kid as an advantage to scare others off.

TADC x child!reader who is a menace! (platonic)

wasnt quite sure what to title this so!! some segments may be shorter than others since im still trying to get a hand of writing/coming up with ideas for certain characters (cough cough gangle) (i love her sm but shes so hard for me to write idk why) hope you enjoy! majority of this post is just me tormenting the cast TToTT

CAINE:

oh my god you kind of remind him of bubble but more... flkmddlvm

makes a time out rule when you keep making threats to the other circus members, that behavior is not family friendly!

he might even consider trying to go into the code and censoring your common phrases as well as some other words, if he has the capabilities for that

still tries to be a dad to you, though, wants to be a good role model and guide you in the right direction for the sake of everyone else

the first time you say something... morbid to him he just

slack jawed, stares at you before shaking himself back to reality and just

bro is astonished he was not ready to hear that today, let alone hear it from a small child

POMNI:

you know how in the other post with a child!reader i mention that pomni is vaguely uncomfortable around kids since she knows they can dish out some real cruelty

take this idea and multiply it by 10x

actually looks like that one sad spongebob meme with the big eyes and tear when shes put in charge of keeping an eye on you during an in house adventure

meek attempt to get you to behave

not much to say here imo, since its like an amped up version of the last post :O

JAX:

makes a joke about how youre already entering your edgy phase, he now has to watch his back lest some of his digital fur be shaved off

fear does not come close to describing how he feels when he discovers that you somehow found keys to some peoples rooms. he hopes you dont have a key to his room

and he thought he was hot shit, but no some random kid makes him fear the consequences of his actions

is this his punishment for his constant bullshit? what did he do in particular to deserve this?

instinctively looks up at the ceiling when he enters a room to make sure youre not about to drop on him

congrats, youve instilled fear into the funny rabbit

RAGATHA:

the 'nightmare kid' thing some babysitters go through at least once in their life, but instead of tantrums and such its just you talking about how you sometimes tear apart the dolls that came with your room. to the doll person

very uncomfortable by a lot of the stuff you casually say, even more so because its coming from a kid. though i think she would be uncomfortably be talk like that in general

SWEARS that one day shes going to blink and youll suddenly be right next to her or within her proximity

like on one hand she wants to try to guide you to be less dark, like caine, but i think she would need someone to back her up because she cannot get the image of the torn up dolls out of her head

KINGER:

poor man

like even if the things you said were empty threats, he would be scared shitless

if he isnt already in his fort, hes retreating to it the second he sees you around

kind of funny since kinger is in his late late 40s and youre a kid and hes terrified of you

anyways

less of a discomfort thing and more so scared that youre going to go through with the things you say

he walked into the common area one day and saw you literally crawling across the walls, he was with gangle when he saw it. you see his irises of his eyes shrink

doesnt even bother going to his fort, which is under where you currently are

he just

slowly

backs away, he can find refuge in his room... unless you have a key to his room

ZOOBLE:

less discomfort more annoyance with zooble, i think that while she would find it funny when a kid swears she finds people talking like that to be cringe; kid or not

the only one who isnt really scared of you. sure you threaten to disassemble them constantly and hide their pieces across the grounds to assure they can never be whole again, but they're just internally cringing while you try to make them turn away

in a weird way you two create an odd dynamic where you just go on and zooble just halfway listens, you kinda just talk at them

like while caine tries to be your dad, and ragatha tries to be.. something.. zooble is like a weird 'friend'

probably has the most potential to become a friend and get you to chill, but thats just based on my experience

like if its an attention/reaction thing, zooble isnt going to give it to you, which kind of. ruins the point of it for you, and you just

stop, or at least tone it down over time

or maybe thats just me seeing zooble having the potential to be an older sibling figure

GANGLE:

the gif is gangle when you get your hands on her

i understand that she cries easily, but like, you have probably made her cry at least once either on accident or on purpose

i think shes one of the few characters out of the cast who would probably start avoiding you for the sake of her emotional state, but she would feel bad about it since at the end of the day you're a kid

refuses to go anywhere near you when her comedy mask is broken, because otherwise shes a glum mess

you know how in poppee the performer, kedamono's mask sometimes just. pops off when he gets scared or surprised (well it happens regardless of expression/mood but yk)

gangle does that when she sees you LITERALLY CRAWLING ON THE WALLS LIKE A BUG

how are you even doing that

she doesnt wanna know, actually

"imma tie you up double knotted style" *high pitched crying*

[wildglitch]

More ideas for the What if...Zombies Spidey X DC AU

I wanna expand from this a bit cause I thought of it the other day and it wont leave me alone 💀

Anyways, these are just some points I have decided to add to this AU starting with Peters background and what I think he went through. Since this is mostly Marvel stuff, you can even ignore the DC aspect of it

Buckle in cause its a long one

-The Zombie apocolyps started when Janet got back, and canonically, that was about a month before Bruce showed up. So we have a month to play with and get everyone together, but honestly, that too little time for me man. So Im changing the timeline so that everything started 7-8 months earlier. That gives our heros time to find eachother at diffrent times and overall really let Peter live in a full blown Zombie apocolyps

-Peter, totally spent like a full month and some alone. He was told by Tony to "stay put and help the little guys" and just never saw him again. Poor guy.

-All his friends and familly died within the first week. Some lasted a bit more then others but all of them ended up getting infected. So by the second week Peter had lost everyone he ever knew and loved

-Peter spent his month alone searching New York for survivers. He was so deaspreate to find people and protect his city that he would go days on end without sleeping or eating.

-In his attemps to find any living being, he made all of Queens and later the rest of New York into his web, so he could know whenever anyone got caught in it ( like how Andrew Spider-Man tracked the Lizard in his movie but way bigger) He also has help from all the surviving spiders helping him in his search

-Adding to that- his webs? Zombies dont like it. Peter upgraded the formula to make some that dont disintigrate, but Its not that it hurts them, they just avoid it. he thinks they can tell they shouldnt touch them.

-A month alone has gotten Peter to see things. Thing he wishes no other person has to ever whitness ("Holy fucking shit the rats got infected!")

- Peter made himself a guide for this like in Zombieland. Rule 7. Dont go into the sewars

- Peter killed 9 Zombies in his time alone and he hated it

-We could either do "Bucky arrives to the webbed New York and finds feral spider child who attacts him cause Peter hasent sleeped in many days and hes scared shitless of the first human he finds" or " Hope is informed by the others that they havent gone into New York cause something is guarding it. But when she enters to investigate, insted of finding some eldrict Zombie horror, she finds a small scared teen in his web that just wants a hug from a matrnal figure" pick your favorite, (it could also possibly be both tbh)

-Momma Wasp > Mother Potts (Im sorry but its true 😔, the content dosent lie)

-Peter was one of the last if not the last person to join the group before the episode happend and when he saw all of the people that were there, insted of being sad of how few they were, he cried tears of pure joy over the fact he wasnt the last person alive

-Peter Hugged happy and he didnt get pushed away :)

- Peter hasent showerd in weeks Parker: Im so happy Im not alone!

The adults, who havent had as nearly as bad as a time as Peter: Have you meet soap????

- Peter had already made the base we see in the episode long before the others arrived. He had hoped it would be one of many safe houses for the survivers he would find, but that quickly become a broken dream. He was so happy to be able to use it, and no ones had the heart to reject his base even though they had their conserns about the saftey of it. (the base never once fell due to Peters care)

- Peter was super deppressed even though he tried to hid it, so Kurt, being the only semi-normal person there, told Peter to make videos for future survivers they find. And thus, his guide become digital!

-I like to think the group had like 4 or 5 more people at the begining, but over the course of the months, they ended up dying and getting infected before the episode.

Possible characters could be:

Matt Murdock: survived cause he could tell when someone got turned (he's canon now so it counts lol)

Any of the Barton kids: They where pretty isolated, so maybe we could have one of them survive and be rescuede by a S.H.E.I.L.D agent and end up with the group (+2 angst points for losing their sibilngs)

Jack Lockly: And only him. The rest of the group see this random cabie surviver wondering "how tf?", while in reality, he was minding his own business at the back of the mind and is now forced to front 24/7 cause they are in constant danger with the Zombies and he has no idea what to do. (The others are not responding, he has a big ass bird yelling at him, and he has no clue what to do with the body or how to fully take care of it)

Darcy Lewis: She was in her 2 broke girls era when shit hit the fan and now she's here

Kamala Khan: *Looks into boxs grandma brough during visit* *takes bangle while running from Zombie* *Puts it on* *Survives* *Suprised Pikachu face*

You could posibly add other characters you like, but dont forget that these guys have to die by the time the episode rolls around so keep that in mind

-adding to that last to point:

1.Matt and Peter became close and would go on suplie runs together. Matt trained Peter a bit, and Peter would acompany Matt to church. Not cause he has too, but because he wants to be there with him. Something happend and Matt sacrificed himself to save Peter. Achevment Unlocked: The Sensei always dies

2.Peter, Becomes friends with the other Surviving kids: *Insert happy spider*

His friends end up dying: *insert depressed boi*

3. Pete: Sooooooo

Jake: ?

Peter:... Have you ever had to deal with this old Dominican lady named miss Sanches that lives between 7th and 8th?

Jake: Thats really racist, yk that

Peter: OH! No- I just

Jake deals with horibble passengers Lockly: But Yes! jfc she was the worst!

Peter deals with the little people Parker: RIGHT!?

4. Darcy Lewis: *determend to save this poor kids love life*

Peter fought his dates dad Parker: Boy do I have some bad news for you

5. And saddest one: Whenever one of them died, Peter would take their belongings and burn all but one thing a keep it on him to remember them by. I'll let you sit with that

Remember, That up there is in the gray bettween canon an non-canon. I'll let you guys pick.

-Hope became a mother figure to him. We always have the "Oh so and so is his dad" or "Hes totally *Insert characters* son"- NO! HE IS A MAMAS BOY! Look at Him! That boy was raised by a woman, to respect women and Im teird of people ignoring it! (Lmao)

He bonds with her over science, their experiences with super heroing, bugs, and their want to save those who they have lost. When she found him, he was so teird that he mistaked her for his aunt May and cried into her arms. they dont talk about it much, but Hope put in the effort so that he dosent have to do to many hard things.

-You ever seen any of the marvel cast interveiws? ya, thats Peter and Buckys relationship just more in character. sure, dose Bucky see a bit of Steve in Peter? Sure, but not enough to stop him from throwing that lil' shit to the wolfs (Zombies) . Remember how in another post I mentioned how Peter would be thrown out the window? Ok, now imagien them having to be roommates because of how the base is set up (Every one must share a bus with another).

Peter may have lived with the others. But Bucky was his Roommate, and they both know shit you can only learn by sharing a room. Its a constant game of blackmail and horror.

-Happy's additude twords Peter turns from Homecomming to Far from home In this time.

-Every Holiday was celebrated.

-And Finally, Every death hit much harder due to all of them being much closer

Do I have more? Yes. Is this post way too long? Most definetly. Do I regret it? Kinda, but its fine. Will I make another post focusing more on the crossover side of things? Of most definetly and that is a threat.

But for now, I give you Zombie! Peter AU "Content". (Not the comic, but thw What If episode) (Can you telling I'm having fun with this AU?)

[applcrumbl]

Accidents Happen.

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Pregnant!Reader Warnings: Accidental Pregnancy, Underage sex mention, strong language. abortion mention.

Author's Note: soooooo old. Will eventually redraft :)

Pregnancy, something that Y/N never saw herself having to endure. She knew a lot about it, and the countless classes that becoming an OB-GYN required, had taught her was enough to scare the poor 16-year-old shitless. However, not only the fact that her boobs would fall to her stomach, and her vagina would stretch to accommodate the size of a small watermelon scared Y/N, but also the father of the baby. James Buchanan Barnes, the one Y/N loved to hate.

The two were the best of friends until the year previous when popularity started to come for Bucky. He quickly started trading the many hours they would spend together for underage drinking, and packs of cigarettes. Y/N and their Trio’s third, Steve, were left behind in the dust. Although it was still apparent that Bucky maintained a relationship with one of the two. Y/N suspected that it was her former best friend's new bit on the side that threw a spanner in their works, and how she hated her.

The night before Bucky’s departure. She’d heard of it from Steve. The 107th Infantry Regiment was to recruit a new child soldier the following morning. Y/N gave out her distaste for the war often. Of course, she was worried. Worried for his safety. Despite all that happened, she still desperately cared for the Barnes boy.

It wasn’t until her grandfather’s clock chimed 11pm, and a sharp knock at the door awoke Y/N’s slumber. She wrapped herself in her dressing-gown and ran downstairs. Her parents were out, dancing she presumed, though she wondered why they would want to leave the house whilst it was raining as hard as it was. The visitor knocked again.

It was awkward for him when she opened the door. His teary eyes were hidden by the rain. His clothes stuck to him. He was sure there was a metaphor for his embarrassment somewhere in that. Y/N ushered him inside. Running for a towel to dry him off some. Bucky remembered why he had come. He had come because he knew that when there was nowhere to turn, he would still have her.

It was times like these that he regretted most, losing his best friend.

“Hey Dollface”

The pair spoke until the early hours of the morning. Y/N didn’t forgive Bucky for ditching her for popularity, but she understood why it happened. Puberty was hard on everyone but worse on him. It took him a solid half-hour to explain that.

The grandfather clock in the living room softly chimed 4am, when Bucky and Y/N found themselves in one another’s embrace. On the 3rd little bell, Bucky pulled the girl into a kiss. A long sweaty night of ‘I love you, I’ve always loved you’ ensued, and the two teens found themselves whilst enjoying one another for the first time.

That night became a taboo subject, and although there were confessed feelings on Bucky's part and an all too willing kiss on Y/N’s, the two decided that friendship would be the best way to start their revitalised relationship. Besides, Bucky was to leave the following morning. And so, they carried on about their days as acquaintances, friends at best.

Yet, here she was. Sitting on her living room couch, the very same one they had done the deed on a few months earlier. The brunet sat patiently, confused as to why Y/N had interrupted his story, the one she had practically begged him to tell. Y/N chewed the inside of her cheek

“You gonna tell me or wha-”

“I’m pregnant.” she blurted, a fully brainstormed paragraph was what she’d meant to say, but what just came out was. “It’s yours.”

What felt like hours passed, but in reality was 2 and a half minutes.

The room fell silent, the slight tick of the alarm clock and a chorus of laboured breathing, were the only things heard other than the blood rushing through Bucky’s ears.

“What?” he asked, not entirely sure if he had hallucinated what he had heard.

“I’m pregnant”

“Oh.”

There was nothing else to be said on Y/N’s part, all she wanted to know was how he would react.

“Are you keeping it?”

“I don’t know- I mean- I do. Want to keep it, that is, but. But, if you don’t want me to, I can get an abo-”

“No, You’re not gonna do that.” he interrupted. “Unless you wanted to, I just-”

A tear rolled down Y/N’s cheek, she wiped it away before finally looking at the boy next to her. Bucky was also crying, it wasn’t the first time she had seen him cry but it was different. Salty tears fell from blue eyes onto slightly stubbled skin as he ran a hand through his hair.

[shu-box-puns]

This brainworm is lovingly called ‘Who’s your daddy?’ in my avatar prompt word doc.

Note: This is a potential fic idea if people are interested in seeing it in full. 

DO NOT steal or I’m crawling under your mattress tonight.

Summary: Tuk wraps the recoms around her little finger. A play date with the enemy.

Context: The recoms got revived and sent into the forest. Mansk got briefly separated from his squad, he could still hear them close by, but he couldn’t see them.

Tuk got separated from her siblings and was wandering aimlessly around the forest until a recom stumbled across her (probably Mansk) who was scared shitless by her. Despite her tiny stature, this man has to have some form of PTSD after dying to the na’vi.

Tuk doesn’t give a shit that this weird man is dressed in RDA military wear or that she can’t see his eyes - those sunglasses are GLUED to his face, no wind could possibly remove them - nor that he carries a gun longer than she is tall. All she sees is an adult that’s capable of protecting her and helping her back home. Close to tears, she holds her hands out and makes grabby hands up at Mansk who is just furiously backpedalling trying to get away from her.

His panic makes her panic and she runs after him assuming there’s a thanator or something that spooked him. Still crying. Still grabbing at his pant legs or tail. Whatever is in reach.

Mansk trips on a root or something, and Tuk flings herself down into his lap, latching on tight and squirming to get his arms around her and the soldier is just frozen solid. He’s not breathing. He’s not blinking. He doesn’t know what the fuck to do. He doesn’t do kids. He doesn’t have a fucking clue what to do with them, let alone how to comfort one. His nieces back on earth wanted nothing to do with him. And here is this na’vi child sobbing into his bullet proof vest like he’s her dad or something.

Hesitantly, he brings up his hands and awkwardly pats her on the back, which just makes her cry harder and he wants to disappear. 

One thing leads to another and he manages to get his feet back under him and has the little na’vi cradled to his chest. She’s stopped crying, cheek pressed into his shoulder with her fingers curled tight into his shirt. 

Just Mansk regrouping with the squad cradling a literal child. 

Wainfleet is like: when did you have the time?

And Quaritch is a tired Dad, now Grandpa.

Anyway, within hours, Tuk has the entire Deja Blue Squad wrapped around her little finger. They’re bringing her fruit. Z-Dog has discovered all the ways to make her laugh. Fike is just as confused as Mansk because Tuk has decided he must also hold her because her feet got tired.

And the whole time, she pretends not to know English, just grins evilly as these adults scramble to figure out a plan since the RDA is going to want to confiscate her if she goes back with them. Then there’s a full blown argument about taking her back to her clan and how long it would take. Not even Tuk knows the answer to that one. 

I wanna say that Wainfleet tucks her into his jacket and with the help of the other recoms surrounding him, they manage to successfully smuggle her into the recom quarters. Mansk finds her a little breathing mask and she’s all set. 

At some point, she definitely breaks into someone’s wardrobe and demands the recoms play dress up with her like she does with Neteyam and Lo’ak. She’s definitely dressed in someone’s labcoat - Mansk has no idea who she stole it from - complete with scientist goggles. Meanwhile some poor recom is dressed in various weird clothing combinations with all sorts of leaves in their hair. 

Tuk: “Do you, or do you not feel bonita?” Some unsuspecting recom: “I feel bonita.” Tuk: “Wonderful because you look bonita.”

Mansk is probably her favourite because he’s quiet like Neteyam. Always listening to her endless narrating. And even if it seems he isn’t, as in he’s cleaning something or multitasking, she knows he’s paying attention because one of his ears is always pointed towards her and he nods and grunts in all the right places. 

Wainfleet gives me fun uncle vibes. If she comes up with some sort of prank, he’s definitely the go to man to get it sorted.

Meanwhile Quaritch sees her as a means to get to the na’vi, but gradually softens and develops some sort of soft spot for her. I call him grandpa because he gives me old man, too tired to run after the kid vibes. And he definitely considers Tuk Mansk’s responsibility since he’s the one who found her.

WAIT: You know how I said about Mansk’s sunglasses never coming off. Maybe he’s holding her at some point, and Tuk just casually steals them for herself and plops them on her little head. They’re way too big for her and don’t grip onto her tiny nose, but her ears wiggle so happily and her tail is wagging that Mansk doesn’t have the heart to take them off her. He definitely prefers wearing them because he’s got baby eyes and doesn’t look as intimidating as the older marines without them, but while Tuk wants them, he doesn’t take them back. He just tries to scowl extra hard during meetings to make up for it - it doesn’t work, he looks like an angry toddler.

Cue the Recoms going back into the forest and Tuk being all happy to show them all the cool stuff she knows. Telling them which fruit they can eat. Showing them how to navigate judging by the way the flowers face and which plants grow on which side of the trees. The recoms are quite literally absorbing all the wisdom of this eight year old and she’s LOVING it.

Only for the Sullys to find them and cut the playdate short. 

Little Tuk just peeking out from behind Mansk’s leg and going, “Mummy!” Then ZOOMING over to Neytiri as Z-Dog and Wainfleet try to catch her. She dodges them effortlessly, winding herself around her mum’s waist.

Quaritch is sweating, having flashbacks: “Mummy, huh.”

Neytiri looks royally pissed. Teeth bared, bow drawn.

All the recoms are just backing away, slowly, carefully. 

Mansk is straight back to square one, scared shitless and convinced he’s gonna die again.

[inadvisablebutinevitable]

“maybe one day I’ll write all my thoughts on Thea and Amalia mother-daughterisms bc the Thea brainworms are taking over.”

any chance that day is soon?? 🌝

HELLO ANON I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU YOU ARE RECEIVING SO MANY KISSES BC I LITERALLY WROTE OUT A HUGE DRAFT OF THOSE THOUGHTS AND I SAID I’LL ADD TO IT LATER AND I FORGOT!! BUT YOU REMINDED ME!! I LOVE YOU!!!

I’ll post that separately (bc boy is it long) but here’s a little… prelude, I guess, to how I imagine Thea’s relationship with Amalia starts to shape:

Thea had gone into her pregnancy knowing that she wanted a child, that she would love this child, but the fact that she is now somebody’s mother doesn’t really click until Amalia is born

she knew abt the deal Kevin had with the Moriyama’s, but she was Thea Muldani, who cares if her partner only kept 20% of his salary?

All that meant was that Kevin day was her trophy husband, which, ha. Of course it took a man like Kevin Day to be a worthy trophy husband to her. Being the main breadwinner suited Thea just fine.

and then all of a sudden there was a baby girl, all of a sudden they weren’t DINKs anymore. Ofc with a pro athlete salary they’re not exactly poor but for the first time since pre-evermore, money actually becomes something she has to consciously think about. (Especially because she gets paid less during and after her extended maternity leave)

also in my head Thea has this big plan to return full-time to Exy as soon as Amalia can get on formula, and basically be a part-time mom, full-time athlete because she’ll be damnned if all those years she spent at evermore result in her retiring early for the sake of some kid.

And then Amalia is born. And then the hospital clears them both and Amalia is a cradle strapped to the backseat of their car. And then Amalia is carried into the house and Kevin has to go take a call from the coach of south Carolina’s team (because he’s trying to move closer to Wymack) and Thea is alone with this child that’s hers and all of her plans and hormones are being whipped around in a blender.

In the end, even though Amalia was born the end of the off season specifically so that Thea’s maternity leave wouldn’t cause problems during the season, Thea kind of has to reconcile the image she had in her mind with the truth of being responsible for a whole human being. One she loves. She asks Kevin to take the season off instead of her, but he’s scared shitless of the moriyamas and doesn’t want to deal with the fallout of not getting paid for a whole season.

They hire a maid and a nanny and plan to rely on the hired staff and Wymack, but in the end, Thea strikes a deal with her team to keep her contract while taking the first half of the season off.

However, because she had assured them multiple times that she wouldn’t extend her leave, she’s in a tough bargaining position and ends up getting a huge reduction of her salary. They also do not agree to extend her contract, (which she specifically requested so that they wouldn’t have to move to another state with a toddler when her contract ends in two years)

the decision to stay was hard, but ultimately decided when Thea gets a panic attack the first time she goes to practice with her team and gets a call from the nanny that Amalia was coughing so hard she couldn’t sleep. (Amalia was fine of course they went to a doctor but Thea was traumatized)

and the thing is for Thea this was a huge sacrifice. She really believes that she gave up a huge part of her career for her child and she did! But it kind of shapes the way she sees Amalia going forward: as someone she loves unconditionally and will sacrifice for, but let it be known it was a sacrifice. Things like spending time with Amalia, encouraging her non-exy related hobbies, being patient with her during arguments—for her those are less of an obligation and more of a show of how far her motherly love for her daughter goes.

because empathy wasn’t really a thing in the nest and for Thea, showing empathy and compassion is something reserved as an act of love and loyalty to the people she cares about.

Of course that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have it, years of being in the pro leagues have softened her to her teammates and friends, but it’s a big thing for her, something she has to actively think about. She’s loyal to exy first, a Raven through and through. Her daughter is one of the only people that she will change this for, and to Thea that’s a big fucking deal.

in the end I think they have a really good relationship given the circumstances, but (I touch on this in the other post) it’s not without years of therapy for both of them, and screaming fights followed by week-long cold shoulders. It’s not without guilt-tripping and gaslighting and words used as knives that both of them wish they could take back. It’s not without breakdowns and panic attacks and lots of tears.

But they love each other, to an extent they understand each other, and when it’s good, it’s really really good. For Amalia her mom is still somewhere safe, home is somewhere she misses, and she’s never ever afraid to speak her mind in front of her mom because she knows the only punishment she’ll get for confrontation is the risk of a verbal fight (and maybe being grounded). When her parents go to court Amalia screams at the top of her lungs for both of them, because she knows both of them will always, always cheer for her.

[aghostwithnoname]

Official Fuck Raphael/Hope Appreciation Post

Okay, so this is probably going to upset people but I don't care. I'm real sick of this "Raphael is so hot" BS. Like, firstly, that man is MID at best. Secondly, are we not gonna talk about the fact this man is a certified abuser in every sense of the word? Like, sure he's sweet-talking and clever (most abusers are imo). Newsflash: real monsters are rarely people you find unattractive!!!

What really grinds my gears is that you can stumble on Raphael making a deal with a literal child re: my sweet baby Mol and people are like, "but he's hot though". You can walk through his fucking house filled with all the poor bastards who never stood a chance making a deal with him, stuck forever being punished for their "sins", and people will be like, "Omg, my little cringe man" like??? (Holy god, that whole quest fucked so hard with my religious trauma.)

But if not the BIGGEST fucking red flag for this public adoration of Raphael is how he's treated Hope. It's like to them, she doesn't even exist!! Like, my girl has been stuck in that House of Horrors for gods know how long, still refusing to give into his charms and his sweetly worded promises of power (unlike Korilla, who gladly abuses her sister for Raphael). And Hope helps you because for once, she finally sees a way out. The personal notes kept by Raphael on Hope's torment that you can find throughout the house are difficult to read: he tried to break her in the most insidious of ways. He was physically, emotionally, and mentally abusive to her, purely for his pleasure. Purely for the reason that he finds it amusing that he can literally torment Hope in hell.

I get that we don't have to morally approve of every character we like! For comparison on liking "bad" characters, say what you want about Astarion -- He's not a great guy! He's done some pretty bad shit! BUT he was FORCED to do all of those things by Cazador. (Also, kindly fuck the Cazador apologists, seriously.) Astarion's jaded selfishness is not who he really is, which is slowly revealed when you show respect for his personal autonomy and literally the smallest amount of kindness, whether or not you romance him. Raphael, on the other hand, wants to hurt people because it feeds into his "Daddy Mephistopheles didn't give me enough attention" superiority complex -- and tbh, that's just fucking pathetic.

The REAL OG who you all should be praising is Hope.

She has been tormented for centuries. She has been victimized by her own flesh and blood for her abuser. She has been shattered and ground down into her smallest pieces until there's almost nothing left… and yet, she hopes. She hopes for freedom. She hopes that her sister will return to being the person she so fondly remembers from her childhood. She hopes she can trust you, in spite of everything she's been through. Not to mention, when you do free her, Hope is literally one of the most badass companions you can have to help you win that fight! (For all these reasons and more, she reminds me a bit of my other fav girl Karlach.)

The reason Raphael delights in torturing Hope is because hope is a dangerous thing to have when all seems lost -- and that's the entire fucking point. This scared shitless little man sought to bend Hope to his will because her persistence/resistance threatened him, and by the gods, she is my favorite NPC because of that.

As someone who has been abused, by other people, by insidious ideologies, I can never ever, ever side with someone who so clearly mimics the very things that tried to break me and kill what remained of my hope. I see myself in Hope. Her indecision, her fear, as she dares to believe freedom is a possibility. The way her dialogue is delivered (much kudos to her voice actor) directly mimics that same scared voice in my head that second guesses myself, that worries I am not enough, that my abusers were right, that I wasn't ever deserving of happiness or being alive -- and then that same scared voice cuts through it all and screams to survive out of spite, to live happily as the best form of revenge.

Again, I get that we don't have to morally approve of every character we like! I totally understand it -- but I also want you all to expend some critical thinking as to perhaps WHY so many people are fawning over a man who is so clearly is a thinly veiled piece of shit over a woman who dared to challenge him, suffered for it, and emerged victorious.

Hope is fucking amazing. She is a gods-damned survivor. She is fury and vengeance and sorrow and joy all at once. She stays in hell to help the other souls tormented and abused by Raphael. She asks that you visit her some time. She strives to create a home of out the house that was her prison… and truly, I hope every day to be more like her.

[sunflowerxthoughts]

rockstar! eddie x nepobaby reader???? idk probably reader would a daughter of two famous actors or singers and they meet on a carpet, fall in love and started dating in secret and 💞💓💓💖💘⭐️😭💌 sound so perfect probably i would cry

It's taken me so long to write this but I'm actually turning this into a series!!! This seems like a really nice universe to explore, so I'm writing some hcs now of their story and you guys will get the full fics next. I need a name for the series so you are more than welcome to give ideas!!!! That being said as always my content is +18 only and requests are open. Thanks! And thank you for this request, love! 💖💖

First thing first I can imagine reader being the kid of a famous musician in the rock/metal scene and the mother being an actress. An only child but not too spoiled, I think her parents wouldn't really hand her everything in a silver platter.

However nepotism is nepotism so when she starts to show an interest in acting it's not that hard to get a job, even if she asked to be treated like the others.

Eddie and reader meet at a red carpet for an event involving dad's band.

Both of them are like holy shit how are you even real.

Of course they exchange numbers but for the public eye it ends there. Just two kids being besties.

H O W E V E R

They really click. Text constantly, they send each other silly selfies, they tell all about their days, some text that almost cross the line between friends or more.

So naturally both Gareth and Steve tell him to just ask reader out.

Eddie is like no.

And everyone just ???????????

He is just scared of the outcome but of course readers says yes. Only he forgets to tell the boys so like no one know.

NO ONE.

They are like teenagers, sneaking in and out, booking hotel rooms to have silly little dates under silly little names.

And of course the first person to find out is reader's dad and poor Eddie is scared shitless. But he loves Eddie and agrees to keep it a secret because how could he say to his little kid.

So now they get secret dates and family dinners with r's family and Wayne.

Fast forward to a year later, both happy, the friends know, everyone is cool with keeping it lowkey and then they get papped.

And shit goes down. Like everyone loves the couple but they are both so angry their little bubble of privacy got destroyed.

And the fans!!!! They are so happy but so ready to harass the tabloids to leave them alone.

And suddenly the two are doing red carpets together, looking so in love. And of course they are photographed out and I'd like to think they do like Emma and Andrew or Joe and Sophie just trolling the paps in the best way possible.

All in all it's a very sweet but dramatic relationship.

But he knows they are IT for him so he is willing to absolutely kick anyone's ass for them. And he does.

More coming soon.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

Holy shit the ending of The Invitation was so good!

When Aro called for Sulpicia and Renata and they didn't immediately show up I fully expected them to have fallen victim to Edward tbh. It was the only explanation I had for why he stayed away for so long.

Since they survived (yay!), what did he do in the meantime? Is he just such a shit tracker that he had trouble finding Mike in his own house?

Also how did he go about Bella's murder I mean abortion? Did he take out Esme first before attacking Bella or did he not plan that far ahead and had to deal with her in the middle of Bella bleeding out? Did he burn the child before trying to stop the bleeding or did Bella have to witness her child's murder?

Caius will probably explode with anger when he finds out what nonsense Aro decided to overlook (imagine getting the ruler of your community and basically the world to clean up your petty murder. Amazing)

The Invitation, now finished, by me and @therealvinelle.

Thank you, glad you enjoyed it so much! Look, @therealvinelle, praise!

Now, onto your questions.

What the Fuck Was Edward Doing?

Well, as you note, he first had to find Mike's house. You'd think this would be simple but as we know from canon, Edward's a shit tracker. He's best when following minds, which means he had to walk around town and try to sus out Mike's thoughts. Not too much time for him but it meant he wasn't immediately there.

He also spent these minutes internally seething as he pictured what that fiend Mike must have done to Bella. Forcing him to imagine very moment of it, how exactly it must have happened, now knowing what it's like for himself after having had sex with his wife and the horror that Mike Newton had stolen it for himself first.

Then he gets there, it's time to interrogate Mike.

Edward ruthlessly interrogates Mike, not with the goal of finding out what happened (he knows that) but of getting Mike to confess. Mike is scared shitless, so much so he would confess, but he has no idea what he's supposed to be confessing to because all Edward says is "you know of what I speak".

Mike really doesn't.

Eventually, when Mike tries to throw Edward out, it's too much and Edward gives into temptation: he smashes Mike's head like a melon then drinks some of the blood that splattered like the demon he is (because Edward's embracing his inner demon in this moment, you see).

Edward then had a moment of panic that his eyes are read and he's about to return home but tells himself it was a) for the greater good of he killed a villain b) he wants everyone to know he killed Mike (including that fiend Aro) c) HE IS FINALLY A MONSTER AS HE ALWAYS KNEW HE WAS!

So, that's what took Edward so long.

How Was Bella Murdered?

First, Edward lamented his involvement, as Aro heard from outside the house and decided he wasn't sticking around to eavesdrop on. The rest of the Cullens, sans Esme (poor Esme), decided the same thing thinking that Edward and Bella were about to have the fight of a century (that of course would not end with anyone's murder).

Once Edward was done blaming himself (this took quite some time, I guarantee it), Edward tells Bella that they're calling Carlisle and asking for that abortion. Bella reminds Edward that Carlisle brought that up already and Bella said no, she's waiting the month until the fetus is probably (maybe) developed enough to have the best chance at survival.

Edward then spends some time arguing with her, pointing out that this child will a) likely be a demon and certainly not human b) this is killing her c) she's already drinking blood like a fucking monster.

Bella's not hearing it, it's a baby, Edward.

Edward of course is reminded that he and Bella have already had this fight when they arrived, when he (correctly) thought it was his child but was distracted by Aro having postulated it was Jacob Black's.

Edward then concludes, as he did in canon, that Carlisle is unlikely to change his mind. (Now, Edward blames Esme and Rosalie for this, and we'll get into this shortly).

Rosalie will never permit an abortion, even if Bella herself was willing. She carries too much baggage and regret over her own inability to have children. When she returns, she will stand in his way, which means Emmett will also have to stand in his way. Edward won't win that fight (something you'll remember he concluded in canon as well for all his talk in Eclipse about being a super awesome fighter yo).

Carlisle won't abort her because it would distress Esme so much. Even if Bella changes her mind, Edward doesn't think Carlisle will do it because of Esme and her lost son.

Edward realizes he has this very slim window of opportunity and, like usual, Bella has no idea what she's talking about and he's just going to have to beg for forgiveness rather than ask permission.

Edward tells himself he has a medical degree, he has unparalleled control when it comes to Bella, while he's never performed surgery he knows, in theory, what it's all about.

He can do this.

After having pumped himself up, he excuses himself to go talk with Esme. Bella, of course, is distressed but figures Esme will bring him around and that he needs to talk to his mom. Bella's just going to sit here, slurping on blood, waiting for him to be reasonable.

Edward chooses to decapitate Esme for two reasons. One, so she doesn't interfere out of misguided beliefs. Two, to take the decision out of her hands, now in the aftermath she'll have no guilt because she had no idea/could do nothing to stop it. Three, so that she wouldn't lose control and end up trying to devour Bella, again so she won't feel guilty and also because eating people is bad. Four, so she doesn't have to see this, it will be bloody, messy, and Edward doesn't want her to witness any of this or have the vision of Edward aborting a child ingrained in her brain.

He makes Esme as comfortable as he can, places her head far out of reach, then returns to Bella.

Rather than discuss things, though, he knocks her out and prepares for the operation. He quickly discovers what Carlisle had earlier, that surgical equipment doesn't work on Bella's abdomen, and realizes he has to open her with his teeth.

He does so, but as Carlisle had suspected, while the blood has vastly helped Bella's recovery it wasn't enough yet. Bella immediately starts bleeding out (with Edward having no intention at this point of turning her), and the stress is too much for her heart.

Bella dies of cardiac arrest while Edward is horrified and distracted with the two-week fetus Renesmee that he ate out of Bella's womb.

Bella then dies, Edward watching in horror, not having thought this was truly possible as of course he'd save her and she'd stay human.

In the aftermath, Edward immediately burns the fetus, then sets about to stare dead eyed at Bella's corpse until Aro will surely come to kill him.

Caius

Well, Aro probably won't tell him the details, it's not really important anymore as Bella's very dead and Edward will likely ask Jacob to kill him.

If he did, though, I imagine Caius would be exasperated more than anything else. He's made his point already, Aro sees it for himself, and there's Edward eating the goddamn neighborhood because his wife is frisky.

As it is, Caius will be distracted enough by the news that Edward killed his wife after all, and is into that virgin sacrifice thing apparently, to ask for too many details.

[marxthedumdum]

Imagine this: WERECAT STEVEN.

- He is based on the Maine Coon or Norwegian Forest cat breed. Or a Lykoi. Though probably Maine Coon. :) Or a lion. (Shrugs)

- His normal form is the same, his werecat form has the upper body (and tail) of an anthropomorphic Maine Coon cat! Only slightly taller. And scarier, because of the red eyes.

- ZOOMIES!! ZOOMIES EVERYWHERE!!!

- When he is grumpy, excited, or sad, his ears perk up.

- His hair connects and becomes fur. It's hard to tell where the mane ends and the cat body begins. Unless if you're Daisy, who grooms her husband on the regular (because she's a cat groomer. That's an actual job lol)

- Probably adopts a kid or adult (or both) from the street and turns them into a werecat or a catgirl. (Or cat beastman or cat demi-human lol)

- Meows whenever he wants attention. He baps and smites you if you mock his meows.

- I can imagine he roars. His roar is basically really loud and is a lion-like one, meaning a poor victim who hears it is gonna be too scared shitless to move, and it makes his job of smiting and/or turning his victim into a werecat/catgirl/cat demi-human/cat beastman MUCH easier!!

- Definitely turned Aria (Aerith), my OC (and possible secondary sona) into a werecat at some point.

- Daisy is probably a cat demi-human or cat beastman lol

- Swap!Daisy is probably a werecat who is based on the Lykoi. Swap!Steven is a cat demi-human/cat beastman who is an excellent knitter and gives her lots of sweaters and hugs and scarves and mittens and such just to keep wifey warm 💕💕💕

- MissingNo probably turned Steven into a werecat as part of the Ritual that brought Miki back....and now he seems to be some Alpha Werecat who can turn others into werecats or catgirls/catboys or cat demi-humans. (Or cat beastmen lol)

- Milkman Steven is SCARY AS FUCK as is, but imagine him, all covered in blood from murdering people, entering the house in werecat form, and stares down at Doorman Daisy!

"Babe. The baby wants milk."

Daisy looks behind her, and a sigh escapes from her lips.

"Steven, we don't have a child...unless you're talking about that werecat kitten you adopted the other day."

"No. I am talking about myself and my desire for milk-what do you think?!"

"...well, you're coming with me, regardless. We need to get her some tuna."

- Having a werecat husband is tough. Same with a werecat child he adopted (and probably turned into a werecat prior to adoption 😨). Imagine opening a can. And you see a cute tabby and a big black ball of fur. Both staring at you!

Also, he smited me and now I dunno if I'm a catgirl or a werecat or a cat demi-human lol here's a bonus picture

(lol, I don't know if I should make Aria their adopted child or their bio child or some kid/adult that Steven found and took in by force or by luring in with choccy milk lol)

i like to think that. missingno has a mind of its own and tries to mutate steven beyond recognition to drive him into Maximum Madness and fully possess him but eventually gave up when he and his wife keep being stubborn jackasses and then got kids (if we go by your oc/fan-child hc) :))) speaking of milkman steven, DOORWOMAN DAISY‼‼‼ steven casually snitching on other doppelgangers just to make daisys job easier,,, (whenever its stevens turn to req entry he starts becoming the Furball he is and scratches the window with pleading eyes until he gets in) sometimes steven will also get in the office w his wife and cuddles with her and the amount of weird faces the neighbors give them XD (daisy: me and the bitch i pulled by being autistic) to help steven with the money to make milk, some days daisy would work as the one killing the doppelgangers instead of detecting 'em since it pays her more than being a doorwoman...... and steven just. tags along. :3

[sanitizedsubject]

Why did Squidbeak hide so much from stachi?

TDLR: they were scared shitless.

Non-TDLR:

Imagine how Aleena and Libby feel. Aleena has just been told like a week ago that she’s to train to be captain— to her, this is not “lead a military squad!”, this is “hey kiddo, you’re head of household now. Objectively terrifying to hear at 17/freshly 18.

Libby is in no better position. She’s caught between the splatoonified idea of ruthlessness, an identity crisis over her mom being a dead assassin, and guilt over what she “did” (read: forced to do) in the metro. She swore she’d never commit senseless, ruthless violence like her mother— ran from HOME for it, and then Tartar forced her to do that anyway.

Then Four, who Libby thinks is too idealistic, and Aleena believes to still be a child, RESURRECTS A CORPSE THAT THEY BOTH HAVE TRAUMA ATTACHED TO. Because Four resolved to LOVE PISTACHIO.

So Four just broke the laws of physics, probably proved the existence of some kind of afterlife, and you just… what? ���Sorry dude, science says you’re probably doomed” to the poor thing?

Stachi starts moving, following Four, then starts talking and having opinions and stuff. Four’s smiling more than they have seen her in years. Do they break both of their hearts?

As for HOW Four did it? The answer is love and something way more complex.

[sergeantsporks]

You've cursed me too Sergeant.

Because I had a frigging dream about the Gilded Family!

The premise seemed to revolve around rescuing (our) Hunter?

Only he wasn't living underneath Belos' thumb as the Golden Guard, oh no, he was living in the woods! And no, not just in a "Oh, he must've run away from home" way. No, apparently he'd been living in the fucking wilderness for years at that point!

Oh and Luz was there too, of course. I guess she'd been living in the woods with Hunter too?

Anyway, the Gilded Family has finally "found" Hunter! Yay! (Apparently they couldn't find him before?!? Lol.)

Only, no, not yay! Because Hunter is scared shitless of them! He runs away! Luz tried to fight Caleb to protect him!!!! Only she didn't know any glyphs?!? So it was just sort of sad IMHO.

She started pleading with Caleb to not "hurt" Hunter? (Evelyn meanwhile has Hunter in a bear hug to stop him from bolting again.) And Caleb was like, "Don't worry, none of us would ever dream of hurting Hunter, we're his family!"

Lol, that sure changed her tune. Luz was then going to Hunter all happy and excited like, "Look Hunter! We found your family! You can finally be with them!" Maybe Hunter did run away from Belos after all?! Maybe he didn't believe Belos when he told him everyone was dead?!

Then got lost in the woods for years, I guess. Lol.

Okay, so. Caleb and Evelyn take Hunter and Luz back to the Gilded House. (Luz didn't have anywhere else to go? For some reason??)

The Grims' are all happy to welcome Hunter and are curious about Luz. Everything seems to be going well, but then!!!!

It comes out that Luz is human!

Oh noes! That's terrible... I guess! Cue everyone freaking out!

Hunter --Who'd up until this point alternativated between being skittish and being docile-- gets super protective of Luz! Going all "You can't take her away from me! She saved me! She's my sister!"

Which calms everyone down actually, lol.

Gilded Fam ask Luz if that's true, does she really think of Hunter like he's her brother?

Luz looked at them like they'd all grown two heads, lol. She goes "Of course".

Then someone (I think it was Sam?!?) asked her if she knew about Hunter being a witch. You could've cut the tension with a knife. Half of the Fam were giving Sam dirty looks, the other half were staring at poor Luz like she was a ticking time bomb.

And Luz says "Why does it matter that Hunter is a witch? I've known that he's a witch since day one."

XD Everybody let's out a breath and goes back to welcome new family members antics.

And that's the end.

I guess that's the story of an AU where Hunter ran away from Belos to find his supposedly dead family, turned into a half-feral child of the wilderness in the process, met Luz and trauma bonded with her and got both himself and his human sister adopted by his human-leery family.

The things my subconscious cooks up, lol.

Incredible, I love it. Sam WOULD be the one to ask that question, fjorjfioer. He'd be like "Hm, speaking out of scientific curiosity, what would your reaction be if you found out that your quote end quote 'brother' was a witch? Purely hypothetically. Of course."

[halfblood-princes-crown]

*drum roll* me again with the dark snape au.

Everyone is desperate at this point and don’t know what to do, Dumbledore starts asking for the ministry to lock outside the country.

They even contact Remus in hopes in wolf senses would come in handy.

Professor mcGonagall is trying not kill albus because she knew it wasn’t a safe for a magical child to live among muggles.

Sirius is still having nightmares but the nightmare changes, he’s Padfoot in them now and he’s following snape and Harry while they walk away to the unknown, so that’s how he sparks the idea of escaping.

Meanwhile Remus knows Harry is not in England anymore, he can’t smell his scent anymore, so he start moving across Europe in secret.

Back Harry who’s now scared shitless from severus, he stays in his room and doesn’t speak, he eats then vomits it later when snape isn’t looking, he cries himself to sleep and Harry is just becomes miserable.

Severus knows he done fucked up but is in denial because what he’s doing is for the boy’s best, right?

It doesn’t last long though before Harry faints on the floor after a week vomiting and not seeing the sun, now severus is panicking just a little bit.

So he shoves potions in the child’s throat until some color comes back to his face then decides that he would actually need to talk with the boy again to avoid this happening in the future, he couldn’t kill the boy now could he?

When Harry wakes up again he sees that he’s still in that same miserable house and his depressed state just worsen.

Severus keeps asking him questions but Harry is completely nonverbal, it pisses severus off and he start threatening to speak or he won’t ever be out in the world.

Harry stares at him then turns around crying softly and muttering how he wants his mommy.

Now severus is devastated, he doesn’t want to hit the boy again and he’s scaring him even more, so he just leaves him alone for now.

As for Harry’s wand, it’s useless now because the boy is in too much distress to pay attention to the spells severus is casting.

Remus catches the scent of Harry finally when he arrives at Switzerland but he can’t locate him where exactly because of the wards.

Sirius escapes but just like Remus he can’t find Harry anymore in Europe.

Coming back to Harry, he’s now allowed to be around severus while he brews in the basement of the cottage, Harry is drained but a child’s curiosity never ends so he lingers around, doesn’t touch anything but watches until severus is irritated enough and throws a beginners spells book at him and tells him he’s allowed to be outside for an hour to practice but don’t bother to try running away because he can’t.

OOUUUUUU

They contacted Remus for his spidey senses 🤧

And AS MINNIE SHOULD! Rip him a new one, girlie 🙄☝🏽

Damn…Sirius escapes and Remus is on the trail…I need a seatbelt for this💀

Severus…my guy…you need therapy. 😭😭

Yea, this plan wasn’t well thought out on his part but he’s trying🤧

And Poor Harry…he’s too smol for this. It’s nice to see that Sev gave him a little spell book and some outside privileges 🥹

Small progress is still progress

We’re making progress!

[theunavenged]

What if Jason was having a friend with benefits. And she ends up getting pregnant. How would he react to that cause he is going to be a Dad and she is his friend...

OMG I had this pretty much answered then Tumblr ate it 😱 Damnit Tumblr! Quit treating me bad! 🤬

Anyway... I haven't gotten an ask in ages so thank you anon! 😁

This answer really depends on which Jason you're talking about: comics Jay or Arkham Knight Jay.

I'm somewhat hesitant to answer for comics Jay as I haven't done any analysis on him (or read any comics about him) in ages but I will give it my best shot!

First and foremost, comics Jason would leave all decisions regarding her pregnancy up to his lady friend. If his lady friend didn't want to keep the baby, then that's her decision 100%. Their relationship wouldn't change (and if she wanted it they'd remain friends with benefits and use better protection in the future 😆)

If his lady friend wanted to keep the baby but didn't want Jay to be a part of the kid's life, he'd be cool with it. After all, he's a gun-toting vigilante in the worst city to ever exist—not the ideal person to raise a kid (JAY AND I ARE LOOKING AT YOU BRUCE!) Of course there'd be no question of financial support. He'd overpay child support 😂

If his lady friend wanted him to be a part of the kid's life then I think he'd be nervous yet stoked about being a dad. I also think he'd leave his current lifestyle behind in order to raise the kid right. No way in hell he'd be an absentee dad—that's what Willis was and he hated how it made him feel, more so how it made his mom feel.

Also he'd tell lots of dad jokes. And have amazing dad reflexes.

Regarding his lady friend being his friend AND mother of his child? Nothing would change. They'd stay friends ❤️

AK!Jason? Oh God he'd be scared shitless.

First of all, I think he'd have to be really close to his lady friend to even have a sexual relationship in the first place. This poor baby boy has major abandonment issues so I think it would be extremely hard for someone to ever get that close to him. Now it could happen, and I even headcanon it does happen, but the relationship will be very rocky. He'd be convinced that she'd leave him at any moment and constantly be second-guessing their relationship. (He can't help it—he needs lot and lots of TLC. ALL THE HUGS IN THE WORLD!)

Like comics Jay, he'd leave the pregnancy decisions up to his lady friend but he'd secretly hope she'd terminate the pregnancy. I don't think he'd want to be a dad—actually I think he'd refuse to be a dad. He'd financially support the kid but that's it. He's been traumatized by terrible father figures and he wouldn't want a kid to go through what he went through. He'd be convinced that he'd repeat all of the mistakes of Willis and Bruce, even if the opposite is true. And then there's the whole having his mind warped by over a year of torture—both physical AND mental—when he was only 15/16 (A BABY Y'ALL). He thinks he's too mentally unstable to take on such a responsibility.

If the lady friend decided to keep the baby then they'd probably drift apart 😞

Now, having said all of that about AKJ, I headcanon his s/o eventually convinces him to go to therapy after all the events of the game are said and done. With therapy, my answer would probably be different.

Thanks for asking a great question, anon! Love to hear how others would answer this 💕