#but she actively made my relationship with that brother worse through forcing me to interact and ask for money before we were

[lilgynt]

and we’ve had this convo before of speak to me before you include me in stuff but it never sticks and it won’t till i move out :///

[forevercloudnine]

pre-new 52 scarebat ship meme

 (I actually have no idea what to call this period of comics. The dc wiki calls this the “New Earth” universe... it’s like, everything after Jason Todd was retconned out of being a circus acrobat up to Flashpoint. Anyway like a month ago I asked @heroes-etc​ to send me questions for this version of scarebat from this ship meme but then forgot that I did it because I got distracted by other ships. Sorry Jonathan...)

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

Bruce does DO physical affection — I mean, how many comic panels do we even have of him making out with Catwoman on rooftops — but he’s not especially forthcoming with it. I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that his love interests are more likely to instigate contact than he is, especially when that love interest is a villain like Selina or Talia (can you even IMAGINE him trying to take them off guard in a fight by grabbing their face for a kiss? Because I cannot).

He does occasionally instigate affection with his children/proteges, though usually it’s in instances where they obviously need comfort. Bruce isn’t always great at handling complicated emotional situations, but grief and trauma is something he understands very intimately, and he never hesitates to physically reassure people who are in that kind of pain.

In situations where someone isn’t in the active process of being traumatized, he’s less forward with physical affection. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll reject it if it’s instigated — depending on who you are, of course. I’m guessing he wouldn’t put up with hugs from random members of the Justice League. Superman is his best friend and he would probably try to wiggle out of 90% of Kal hugs if doing so was physically possible. Most of his loved ones don’t really spring physical affection on him unless they need it or it’s an especially emotional moment, however. It’s not really Bruce’s primary love language. 

Jonathan seems even less physically affectionate than Bruce, though obviously doesn’t have a lot of opportunity to demonstrate how he feels either way. Master of Fear offers the only example of him expressing explicitly romantic affection that I know of (unless you count his terrorizing Becky Albright in New Year’s Evil as physical affection, which... might be how he’s thinking of it...?), and it’s entirely instigated by Sherry Squire. He does ask her to the Halloween party, but she’s the one who takes him down to the furnace room for some “one-on-one” time and tells him to kiss her. 

He also notably does not actually get a chance to kiss her, mainly because the whole thing was a prank meant to humiliate him. This might be why he doesn’t try to instigate anything similar with his next crush, Dr. Linda Friitawa (again, unless you count Becky Albright, but I can’t find New Year’s Evil to read anywhere so my only knowledge of his interaction with her comes from Tumblr. I’m like 80% sure he was supposed to be interested in her romantically, but asking someone to do supervillainy with you isn’t the most direct way to express attraction, so I’m taking that as more obliqueness from Jonathan).

He never expresses any direct romantic interest in Linda, but at the very least he clearly cares about her more than he cares for most people, since he, like. Defends her in conversation and apologizes to her for things that aren’t even his fault. Which means a lot, coming from a sociopath with no regard for human life. They do hold hands at one point, but Linda reaches out to him first, and he waits to see if she’s going to back away from his reciprocated touch before he reaches for her other hand. 

He never instigates anything further with her, possibly out of fear of rejection. Unfortunately, it turns out that this was a good call, because Linda was only pretending to be nice to him while Penguin was paying her to experiment on Jonathan without his knowledge. When Batman figures out what they’re doing, she immediately fucks off and starts dating Black Mask.

Even more unfortunately, his 45 seconds of hand holding with Backstabby McMad Scientist is probably the only mutual physical affection Jonathan has ever experienced in his entire life, so honestly I have no idea if he would be more into it as a concept if it was offered to him more often. He’s clearly willing to return physical contact when it’s initiated by someone else, so maybe it is something he would seek out in an actual relationship? He DOES get handsy with Bruce when he has Batman tied up sometimes. 

9. What is the most embarrassing thing they have done in front of each other?

Trip out on fear toxin, both of them, hands down. There are few things more embarrassing than, as Jonathan aptly describes it, being “reduced to whimpering quivers” in front of your enemy. Especially an enemy who’s presumably jotting down notes on your worst fears, since Batman/Scarecrow fights tend to just be competitions in who’s more frightening.

11. What do they hide from one another?

I mean, obligatory mention of the fact that Bruce hides things from absolutely everyone (with the possible exception of Alfred, because Bruce trusts him as completely as he is capable of trusting anyone, and also because it’s really hard to hide things from a parent whose involved in every aspect of your life and already knew you before you developed your pathological need to obfuscate your feelings and intentions).

As Wonder Woman pretty aptly describes during the Tower of Babel arc, even Bruce’s closest allies are never going to hear the full story from him. So it’s deeply unlikely he’d ever be 100% truthful with a supervillain, even if they got close AND Jonathan reformed. 

But it’s notable that Jonathan’s fear toxin has actually given him a more honest look into Bruce’s psyche than he would ever purposefully give to people who aren’t close family members. And by “close family members” I again pretty much just mean Alfred. Unfortunately for Bruce, nothing forces emotional transparency like mind altering drugs. Fortunately for Jonathan, nothing forces emotional transparency like mind altering drugs! Not that I’m recommending that anyone drug a romantic partner into being honest with them. But Jonathan is a trained psychiatrist, so I assume his psychological know-how combined with insights gleaned from the dozens of “sessions” he’s had with Batman in the past would leave him more prepared than most to decipher the mystery that is Bruce Wayne. (@heroes-etc: riddler is SEETHING.)

Jonathan meanwhile is more than capable of putting together a clandestine scheme, but in respect to himself he’s actually pretty straightforward. Though his driving motivation in this continuity gets more and more complicated over time, from the early 90’s “I just like fear” to the early 2000’s “my Granny tortured me with birds when I was a child and now I’m obsessed with inspiring the same fear and submission she forced on me onto others,” what doesn’t change is his willingness to monologue about it to anyone who’s listening.

Also, anything that Jonathan is unable or unwilling to go into detail on, Bruce is more than capable of puzzling out himself. In Scarecrow: Year One he successfully tracks down Jonathan’s old home to recover and read through Granny Keeney’s diary, and after Scarecrow’s Master of Fear origin was published, it’s clear that Bruce has done his research on Jonathan’s childhood. There’s even a (presumably unintentionally) hilarious scene where Bruce pauses mid-rescue of a man that Jonathan has kidnapped and traumatized with fear toxin to lecture him on having bullied Jon in high school.

Is this really the time, Bruce???

(@heroes-etc: oh 100% he nailed that timing.)

13. When do they realise they should get together?

Well, circling back to Tower of Babel, it’s revealed when Ra’s al Ghul has Talia steal Bruce’s contingency plans for defeating the Justice League that Bruce has “borrowed” Scarecrow’s fear toxin in case he has to take down Aquaman.

This was back when Scarecrow had a number of different toxins that induced different phobias, or made people hallucinate hyper-specific nightmare scenarios (such as “being eaten alive by roaches from the inside,” for some terrible reason). Batman notes in his contingency files that Scarecrow has already done the work for him; presumably Jonathan had already designed a formula to induce hydrophobia, so all Bruce had to do was steal a vial of it from a crime scene.

(The sentence “Why not make him incapacitate himself... perhaps through fear?” alone is like 90% of why I think these men would get along like burlap on fire if they ever actually cooperated on something. Also, unrelated, but the polaroid of Jonathan he has in the Aquaman file is weirdly adorable.)

Bruce’s plan for Arthur is incredibly effective, and notably also Bruce’s only contingency that isn’t either inherently lethal or a ruthlessly sociopathic betrayal of emotional vulnerabilities that had been revealed to him in trust and friendship (RIP Kyle Rayner).

(Notably, Bruce’s plans for Kyle and several other leaguers directly involve using their worst fears against them, even without a fear toxin conveniently tailored for this purpose. Bruce just really likes using fear as a weapon against people.)

After Tower of Babel, Bruce obviously needed to create new contingencies, since the whole point is that they were secret plans that no one could see coming. In canon, Bruce goes on to create the A.I. satellite Brother Eye for this purpose (which backfires even worse than his first set of contingency plans, because of course it does). But I think an interesting alternative could have been Bruce tapping Jonathan for more toxin strands tailored to taking down the Justice League. If Bruce Wayne offered to pay Scarecrow’s way out of Arkham in order to develop formulas that could neutralize the world’s most powerful superheroes, is there any way that Jonathan would turn him down? I mean, obviously he would plan on betraying Wayne at some point, and Bruce would similarly be working against Jonathan’s best interests. But maybe if they set aside their “who’s scarier” dick measuring contest to work together for once, they could come to recognize their shared passion: scaring the shit of people.

Also, the Jonathan in this continuity really likes books. And you know what’s a reliably sustainable source of books that can’t be confiscated by the authorities? Dating Bruce Wayne. The manor alone probably has an insane amount of rare books that have been hoarded by his family over the years. It’s like a weird reversal of the Beauty and the Beast, where the rude rich guy who gives a library to the love interest he may or may not have technically kidnapped is the pretty one.

21. Where do they get nervous about going with one another?

If they were dating, I’m guessing Jonathan wouldn’t want to go anywhere in public with Bruce at all. Bruce Wayne is a celebrity bachelor, and celebrity bachelors get a lot of attention, and people who take celebrity bachelors off the market get a lot of NEGATIVE attention. The public reaction to Bruce settling into a committed relationship with anyone would be the kind of weirdly resentful gossipy judgement that the girlfriends of famous princes or actors or musicians always get from tabloids and entertainment television, but in Jonathan’s case it would be a million times worse. Not just because he’s a supervillain, because if there’s any town that would expect its most eligible bachelor to eventually date a supervillain, it’s Gotham. But more specifically because “ugly social outcast” is one of Scarecrow’s most enduring character traits. Not exactly the traditional trophy wife. And though Jonathan’s Scarecrow identity seems to distance him from a lot of the shame he suffered growing up, I’m guessing that the kind of spiteful vitriol that would follow him anywhere he accompanied Bruce would at the least bring back some very unwanted memories.

Bruce probably doesn’t have the same discomfort Jonathan would with being seen together in public. He doesn’t care if people think Bruce Wayne is insane or lacking in judgement as long as they don’t think he’s Batman, and I’m sure he’d find a way to spin “dating a man who prefers to dress exclusively in burlap” into something appropriately characteristic of playboy idiocy. But while he'd definitely respect Jonathan's wishes to stay out of the public sphere, he would probably enjoy any opportunity to bring Scarecrow into Gotham high society, since his presence would definitely shake up a party, and Bruce is generally extremely bored at any social event where he doesn’t have anyone to snark with. And with Jonathan’s scathing wit as entertainment, Bruce might one day fulfill Alfred’s wish and actually make it through an intermission sometime.

I’d say that Bruce would be nervous about taking Jonathan out for “field research,” but I’m sure it would be one of Scarecrow’s requirements for any long term collaboration, so it’s something that he would have to get used to pretty quickly. He would probably endeavor to keep Jonathan away from anything that could retrigger his less healthy behaviors. On the other hand, it’s not like Bruce does that for himself, so it stands to reason that he probably wouldn’t be able to successfully control Jonathan in that regard either. 

It doesn’t help that one of Jonathan’s primary motivations in villainy is his childhood, which is... exactly the same thing that Bruce is fixated on. A significant portion of Scarecrow: Year One is the two of them waxing poetic about how similar they are in this regard. 

Relating to this, even though it might be a terrible idea, I don’t think Bruce would be able to resist encouraging Jonathan to reconnect with his mom. Bruce would never recommend for someone like Cassandra to seek out a relationship with her father, but if someone he cares about has a LIVING parent who WASN’T abusive to them? It seems unlikely that Bruce wouldn’t advocate for reconciliation. Jonathan’s dad obviously never cared about the teenage girl he knocked up or their bastard child, but Karen Keeney is a different story. DC Holiday Special ‘09 makes it clear that Jonathan was taken away from her against her will, and she’s spent a significant portion of her life wracked by guilt imagining what the woman who abused her was doing to her son.  

Ultimately she attempts to commit suicide because she feels personally responsible for every terrible thing her son has ever done, which is tragic because really she’s the only member of the Keeney family completely blameless in the creation of the Scarecrow. In Scarecrow: Year One Jonathan clearly resents her for leaving him and moving on to have another baby that she actually did keep, which I would call a really paranoid case of jumping to conclusions if it didn’t seem extremely likely that Granny Keeney told him his mother didn’t want him and left him to be tortured on purpose.

(Side note, it is REALLY weird how young Karen Keeney is depicted in Scarecrow: Year One. At times her son looks older than she is, and it doesn’t help that her second born child is an infant for some reason. Even if Jonathan is only thirty years old here, then unless she had him at younger than fourteen, she should already be in her mid-forties. Why did she only have a second child so late in life? The implication with her abusive husband is that she ended up getting trapped in a bad relationship for survival when her family kicked her out as a teenager for disgracing the family by having Jonathan. It would make way more sense for her child with him to be at least in elementary school. Also the scene would have been way more interesting if Scarecrow’s sister was old enough to talk.)

Thankfully Deadman manages to convince Karen to hold on to life long enough for someone to call 911, and she ends up surviving the suicide attempt. But were Jonathan ever to reform, it seems like reconciliation would be really healthy for both of them, since miraculously Karen still seems to care about Jonathan despite everything he’s put her through, and they’re both clearly still suffering from the after effects of Mary Keeney’s abuse. 

Bruce would be enthusiastic about this prospect for obvious reasons, although he would presumably still be nervous about the possibility of everything going terribly wrong. And even if everything went perfectly right, he would STILL be nervous, because everytime Jonathan goes to see his mother there’s a chance that she will mention the time that she kissed Batman full on the mouth. And that is not information you would ever want your psychologist boyfriend to know, unless you want to be mocked with Freudian buzzwords for the rest of your natural life. 

(...This would also count as a thing that Bruce hides from Jonathan.)

[lovecinnatwist]

part1/ Just read your Light after Loss story again. I love it so much. I hope you will update soon. Story truly hits the heart! Especially reading Damian’s pov. It truly gives insight into how badly Bats handled Jason. So cold and heartless. No support, no comfort, no care, no attention. Even if they were wary of him, they could have denied him accesses to Dick and the baby, but still been present and active in supporting and comforting him. His skill, madness? That makes no sense.

So I’m finally getting around to this nice juicy ask! Hopefully, I can address everything and clear things up. 

1. I don’t think Dick shouldn’t be blamed for his pack behaviour. 

Everyone ( besides Damian at the time ) were adults. Dick didn’t tell them to stop speaking to Jason. He didn’t tell force them to cut him out. He didn’t blackmail anyone to push Jason out of the pack. He had been taking responsibility for his own health and the health of the baby leaving the bats choices entirely on themselves. 

If Jason or any of the family wants to repair that relationship they would have to do so themselves. Just like how Damian came to speak to Jason in chapter 3.

There’s a reason why it hadn’t been all about Dick but instead a conversation between two estranged brothers. Because at the end of the day everyone is responsible for their relationship with one another.  The healing that needs to be done is up to the individuals not to one person. 

2. We haven’t gotten the entire picture yet. We have no idea how Bruce and the rest of the pack have treated Jason yet. We know that Dick pushed him away, we know that Damian, young and trapped in the middle, took neither side but we haven’t gotten a POV and backstory to how things went down from the rest of the packs POV. I must admit I also didn’t have intentions of addressing that. This story was mostly meant to focus on Dick, Jason and Princess. Damian being there is more a plot device and neutral third party to move the story along. Now that I’ve gotten so many wonderful wondering comments from you and others I’m thinking that maybe extending the story to go more in-depth would be a good thing. That way there are no loose ends and I can answer all the questions all you amazing readers have!

Keep in mind- the story isn’t finished yet so there’s still a lot more to come to the light than we’ve seen!

3. Jason has no plans on going back to Gotham and has no reason to. Dick and Damian suddenly finding him changes nothing. Jason is actually the one in the position of power at the moment. Dick knows that, Damian knows that and once the other bats get involved they will know that too. 

Jason is backed by Ras and Talia at this point and also has the law on his side as he legally has Princess. In order for Dick to get her back, there would need to be a court battle against Jason’s very new legal Ailas. Something that would not only hurt Princess but make their relationship even worse. Which would be kind of pointless. Dick sent Mary away in the hopes that she wouldn’t get hurt, dragging her into a custody battle would do just that.

It would defeat the purpose.

4. Five years is a long time. 

Dick has changed from who he was and so has Jason and Damian. It’s only fair to assume that the rest of the pack has as well. After all of the trauma and healing, we don’t know how the pack will treat Jason now. We have zero clue because we have only gotten to see the past events and no current interactions between Jason or Bruce for example. I’m happy to say that the pack is much healthier and closer-knit now and I hope that that shines through as the story continues!

5. Dick’s sexuality doesn’t have much to do with the situation and his relationship with Jason hasn’t been fully exposed yet. Yes in order to show how Dick’s relationship has softened with Bruce we have some good-natured jabs at him dating a few alphas but I don’t think that's enough to assume how Dick is in relationships. We only saw small glimpses of how he was with Jason and despite Dick having dated and been in committed relationships we don’t have enough information to assume he’s promiscuous or even where he stands now.

 The last this Dick has been thinking about while mourning his daughter, struggling with his mental health and Jason’s disappearance is a new relationship.

There’s a lot of work to do and one chapter is definitely not going to be enough to cover it.

I want to thank you so much for your comment. 

It’s been one that made me realize how much people want justice for Jason and care for him. Jason is one of my favourite characters and it means so much that others love him and want to protect him! My goal with light after loss is to create a story that has no obvious villain or hero. No black and white wrong or right dilemmas. It wouldn’t be realistic if it was because everyone makes mistakes and while we have seen most of Dick’s laid clean and bare to set the stage for the story we haven’t really started deep diving into Jason’s own questionable behaviour. 

All these great heavy comments and questions have really fired me up into writing more and extending the story and thank you so much for taking the time to send me your asks! They were clear and hopefully I addressed everything you wanted to know! 

I wouldn’t be able to make a story like this if there weren't people asking me hard questions and pushing me to think deeper and harder. I’m so thankful for that and hope that you all continue commenting and pushing me to be a better writer!

Thank you again for your time

[countessofbiscuit]

What are your Bobasoka headcanons? I've already gone through all of the (criminally little) fic on ao3 and I especially loved Smothered and Covered, and I saw the majority of the fics in the tag were gifted to you so I'm assuming you're the OG shipper. Feel free to essay if you like!!

Thanks for the ask and kind words about that fic :3 

Oh, Bobasoka … where to begin? It’s a pairing that’s been bumping around in exchange requests for a few years — I figure it’d be easy for anyone invested in Ahsoka’s relationship with the clones to be compelled by the idea. Lledra used to draw Boba and Ahsoka interacting, and it was probably a few panels of their incredible Destinies comic that set my Bobasoka wheels turning. I’m also drawn to them because their journeys traverse so much canon; there’s not just a sandbox to play in, but a whole goddamn stretch of beach, stretching far out into the horizon ...  (#AhsokaLives #BobaSurvived :D)

I have to lead with the proviso that almost everything I write/daydream about/headcanon has a groundsheet of Rexsoka. Ahsoka’s interest in Boba, in my head, is intimately tied up with her attraction to and/or relationship with Rex — or, at the bare minimum, her intimate fellowship with the clones. She went through puberty (maybe with heats!) surrounded by a literal army of handsome, roughly college-aged dudes; that must’ve been a heady mix of heaven and hell. If she didn’t quench her thirst before war’s end and her (eventual) separation from Rex, she’d probably be pretty dehydrated when stumbling across Boba. As for Boba’s attraction to Ahsoka, well ... she’s very pretty, she’s potentially useful, she’s not likely to skewer him in his sleep (+2) on account of being a Jedi (-1), and now she’s the one down on her luck; if he falls in bed with anyone, why not this girl who isn’t afraid of him and stares a lot at his lips?                         

And Boba is like a hot shipping potato — satisfying, hard to fuck up, goes well (read: makes for an intriguing story) with almost everyone. And I think it has everything to do with his liminality, something he shares with Ahsoka and probably recognizes.          

Their neither-this-nor-that-ness overlap in such interesting ways, and they each bring their identity issues to the table — Ahsoka as an on-again, off-again Jedi; Boba as a clone who isn’t a Clone™, a Mandalorian by birth and bearing, but not by the book. At different points in their stories, they identify as different things, and that would affect their headspace and color their view of the other. They wrestle with themselves and each other. Force-user and bounty hunter; privileged topsider and orphaned juvenile delinquent fugitive; GAR commander and outcast clone; Jedi and Mandalorian; Disillusioned veteran and disaffected army brat; Rebellion agent and Imperial contractor.

And as much conflict is baked into these dynamics, it also generates a certain magnetism; and I believe they recognize, on some level, their shared trauma and the symmetry in their experiences. Boba and Ahsoka both have happy childhoods with very little to distress or vex them (beyond the art, I do not jive with Age of Republic: Jango Fett, a Disney-canon comic that not only doubles-down on the Jango-wasn’t-Mando nonsense, but shows him being rather cavalier about Boba’s life); Geonosis happens and their adolescent lives are dominated by war (which is how they came to actively threaten each other as space!secondary-schoolers — whaaaaatf!); they are both dubiously (even wrongfully) imprisoned; and they both suffer alienation and incredible personal loss.  

Boba was set apart from the clones before he was even pulled him from the jar, othered and elevated from the beginning. He never bonded with brothers, he does not identify as a clone. And while there are examples of clones making overtures to him, canonically his relationship with them is fraught and probably made worse when he gets banged up in Republic Central at the tender age of eleven or twelve — and of course, Ahsoka is an accessory to this, the second chapter in his tragedy at the hands of the Jedi. He needed help (whether he wanted it or not), it was not given by clones or Jedi alike (hamstrung by bureaucracy, sure, but surely some other means of intervention might have been lobbied for?), and Boba becomes a right teenage disaster, well-balanced only in the sense that he has a chip on both shoulders.

(n.b. Putting my RepComm hat on for a second, I can’t help but sniffle-laugh at the idea that the Alphas watched him get thrown in a maximum-security slammer and were like “Ah, there he is, the feral vod’ika. First time, we’ll let the little snot earn his stripes. Second time, we’ll bust him out and send him on a tough love retreat with A’den or Jaing.”)

Ahsoka, meanwhile, is part-and-parcel of the institutions that Boba sets himself against, even after she too has been cast out by circumstances beyond her control. She grows up in a supportive Jedi community and then spends some seriously formative years with a whole slew of brothers — brothers that should have been Boba’s! 

Boba, on the other hand, is a great example of the proverb that a child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth. (As he tells Hondo, “Why should I help anybody? I’ve got no one.”) 

The resentment that must create! But also, later, the quiet empathy too — maybe when Boba’s having one of his better days and Ahsoka’s obviously not. 

And all of the above is interesting enough, without also touching upon the wildcard that is Mandalore.

Boba’s relationship with Mandalore .... well, that’s contested in- and out-of-universe and I won’t allow myself to essay overmuch. I subscribe firmly to a Mandalorian Fetts construction of canon, even though Boba must be someone who struggles mightily with Mandalorian identity. He’s raised by a bona fide Mando, a solicitous, loving father who’d have no reason not to pass on his language and beliefs; but at the same time, it takes that village, and when Boba’s clan of two is shattered, he has no one else. The loss of his dad unmoors him from his only anchor to Mandalorian culture and clan.

If Boba had been close to the Cuy’val Dar, one would think he’d have turned to them rather than fall in with Jango’s criminal acquaintances; or maybe the bounty hunters just scooped him up first, and troubled lil’ Boba was shepherded through bereavement by folks who enabled and encouraged him to externalize his anger in a way that gave him a (false) feeling of agency and strength. 

Whatever the reasons, Boba does not repatriate himself to Mandalore (much to Fenn Shysa’s melodramatic dismay). He strikes me as a lapsed Mandalorian; he doesn’t exactly follow the creed besides wearing the armor (scavenged? his dad’s sans helmet? canon is confused on this point, but he doesn’t go Mando until the unfinished arcs at the end of TCW, either for lack of stature, lack of armor, or lack of enthusiasm). I feel like if someone rocked up to Boba in a cantina and had the balls to ask “hey, so you a Mandalorian?” Boba would be like “<ominously slow helmet tilt> who’s asking” and never give you a straight answer.

Meanwhile, Ahsoka gets a crash course on Mandalore from none other than someone who, at one point, belonged to a sect that wanted to expunge Jaster’s legacy from the galaxy — and at the very least, had reason to dislike clones. This isn’t the place to explore my Boba/Bo-Katan feelings, but know that they are fathomless, and I would pay good money to be a fly on the wall of that Kom’rk when Bo-Katan gives Ahsoka Mando History 101 with her own special sauce. Ahsoka is probably more up-to-speed on Mandalore than Boba, and at one point, she may even own more beskar than him! (n.b. After the crash, I think one of the first places Rex and Ahsoka bounce is just inside Mando space, to scope out the Sundari situation and maybe try to scramble a signal to Bo-Katan; she’d have the goodwill to at least get them back on their feet if she can’t help them lay low herself. For a variety of reasons worth maybe ficcing down the line, they aren’t successful.)

I don’t really have a concluding statement except, I just think Bobasoka’s neat :) They hit all my depressed-Millennial buttons.

Headcanon by bullet-point isn’t really my style, but this is tumblr so ... tl;dr:

They recognize a lot in each other, even if they’re slow to admit it, if ever. Boba’s a cagey bastard and Ahsoka doesn’t ever like him enough to be emotionally honest.

They bump into each other during Ahsoka’s walkabout(s) ‘cause Coruscant’s Underworld ain’t big enough for the two of them. Without Slave-1, Boba couchsurfs at Nyx Okami’s garage, but he does his laundry at Rafa’s. He might even borrow the Martez’s new, useful friend for a job or two. 

Ahsoka eventually matures enough to be sensitive about her use of the Force on and around clones, and she definitely doesn’t use it around Boba. Definitely not during sex.

Boba is privately weirded out every time Ahsoka uses Mando slang she picked up off the clones or the Nite Owls.

Boba absolutely kills Cad Bane in that shoot-out, keeps the hat, and lets Ahsoka have it. She shoves it out the airlock and uses it for target practice. 

So many great smut flavours! Hatesex. Acquaintances with benefits. “You’re traumatized and touch-starved and you look just like him/them, and I know how to be gentle and what to do, so maybe we could … ?” They’re both privately comfortable with their bodies and sexuality, but Boba’s got trust issues a parsec long and Ahsoka’s lost confidence; it’s always an awkward affair, but desperation wins out.

They exchange comm codes every time they run into each other, which is kind of pointless because they both use burners.

Ahsoka hitches a ride on Slave-1 more than once. There really is only one bed, so it’s either sleep upright, sleep in a pokey prisoner hold, or sleep with him.

For a few years, Boba can pass as a last-generation clone — the ones that got sold off in bulk units to slavers before Kamino sunk another three years’ food, board, and training into them. Boba pretends he doesn’t notice, easy to really, since he tells himself his helmet is his face. But occasionally, when Ahsoka can convince him there’s profit in it, he agrees to play sleeper agent and assists in liberating a few here and there. 

They don’t talk about Aurra Sing.

When an Imp really crosses him, Boba passes on intel to Ahsoka to ruin their day.

Once, when they’re both super skint, Ahsoka volunteers to get handed in to some relatively minor and out-of-the-way Imperial garrison, so Boba can collect, bust her out, and split the pot with her. It’s the closest she ever comes to telling him “I trust you” — and when he brushes the idea aside, citing something about risk, it’s the closest he ever comes to telling her “I love you.”

Boba sees Inquisitors as muscling in on his game. There are so many lousy Force-users around nowadays, it should be easy pickings, but Inquisitors get privileged information. So he makes sport out of misdirecting them, especially from Ahsoka. 

When he pisses her off, Ahsoka fantasizes about Bo-Katan taking Boba down a peg or two while she watches :)))

Boba experienced Ahsoka’s heat once, secondhand through a cabin wall. He thought he was being clever by shooting Rex up with some Nevoota stim pollen, locking him in with Ahsoka, and hijacking their locked ships. Longest three days of his life, limping on broken hyperdrives and shared fuel stores to the nearest waystation to a soundtrack of violent lovemaking : \

Bounty hunters invariably bump into spies and agents because they work in the same areas. The agents pretend to be bounty hunters, eccentric business people, sex workers, or a range of other things. Sometimes each party knows all about the other, but it’s only polite not to mention it. This happens to Ahsoka and Boba A LOT, especially once she becomes Fulcrum; rebel cells and Imperials often want the same people. Occasionally they exchange fire. A couple times Boba gets imprisoned in Ahsoka’s own brig. Once, Boba blows her cover and definitely lives to regret it. 

(this essay was originally punctuated with pics, but replies with images won’t show up tumblr tags so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 

[primanoctis]

deleted scene from my active fanfic on A03; Larina learns the dark past about Markarth’s Justiciar from Aicantar. 

Corrilian of Skwatch’s past.... | The Flower of Markarth Fanfic

“Your past was just as traumatic as his Larina and yet you turned out the opposite, you couldn’t be cruel if you tried” Aicantar’s sighed with annoyance. 

Larina shook her head, “you keep telling me that he’s dangerous and that I should stay away, how we both share such as tragic past yet you won’t tell me anything at all. You both studied together didn’t you? You must have spent years together” echoing his own exasperation. Sitting beside the small Breton, Aicantar explained, 

“For a while we were friends yes, until he was expelled from the college” at his words Larina raised her eyebrows. If he had been removed from his studies before they were complete why did the Thalmor employ him? Sensing her confusion Aicantar began.

- 

“I suppose in a way you can blame his father for his adoption by the Thalmor. There’s a reason why the people of Skyrim assume all altmer look down upon them, people like Corrilian’s father believed in the inferiority of other races before the Thalmor came to power, and supported them wholly. My uncle told me after the Oblivion Crisis there were many who were skeptical of how involved they were in destroying the oblivion gates, but anyone who questions them were exiled, and killed. Many groups led purges against anyone they thought were unworthy in our society, supported fully by the Thalmor: many people did nothing incase they would be targeted next, some like Corrilian’s father were actively involved” the anger in Aicantar’s words was palpable. 

“But even by their standards his father’s position in society was somewhat looked down upon, and it was taken out on Corrilian at the college. His father, Kardyrian, rose to prominence in the Aldmeri Navy for his prowess and his cruelty. Something happened that forced him to step down, whether Corrilian knew what he never said and with his experience and power, Kardyrian became a ruthless merchant in Skywatch. The East Empire Company had to work with him in order to trade with Northern Summerset, he had obliterated his competitors. 

Knowing that he would need an heir to continue on his legacy, Kardyrian used his power and money to buy the hand of his mother, Irinwe. Their relationship never made sense to him, he said it wasn’t one built on love, clearly with only a monetary gain. She wasn’t a noblewoman either, apparently his father despised them at first, until he was forced to share his life with her. 

His mother wasn’t fond of those balls and those people, said his mother was much quieter and prefered to stay at home with him, much to his father’s ire. Anway, a few years after their marriage, Irinwe gave birth to her first son, surprisingly slow even by our standards --”

“Corrilian has never mentioned having a brother” Larina impulsively interrupted him. Aicantar raised an eyebrow and she silenced herself, allowing him to continue. 

--

“His brother Astirian was what my people call the hulkynd, broken children, children abandoned because of deformities or imperfections. These children are usually cast out by their families, but Irinwe convinced her husband to raise him, evidently his imperfections were not that bad. They raised him hoping that he would join the Aldmeri Navy until it was time for him to take over his father’s work.  But something happened, his father had been informed to his son being involved in some pretty shady stuff, most likely illegal. Corrilian never really explained what, but it was enough for their father to disown him and pretend he never existed. 

His father still wanted an heir of course and along he came. He said his mother was overly affectionate of him, perhaps to make up for the fact that his father kept his distance, whatever attention he gave him certainly wasn’t good. He never knew he had an older sibling”. 

--

As he paused for breath, Larina asked, “So how do you know all of this?” wondering what his involvement was.

For a moment Aicantar looked uncomfortable before responding, 

“When we first arrived at the college, there were a few days to settle in before the teaching began, with each one of us having to individually prove to the mages our skills. Most of the students interacted together but Corrilian remained on the sidelines, he was worse than he is now, silent and aloof. At the time I thought it was shyness, only to realise how bad his superiority complex was. After his test he came returned to our rooms smug that he had impressed the mages through fear. Most of us would cast simple spells that showed off our power, after all our magickal capabilities were not unquestionable, it was only harder for the very few non altermis students.

For his test Corrilian deliberately slit the throat of a goat he had brought from the village and reanimated it for a surprising amount of time, with sentience” necromancy, Larina shuddered at the prospect. She was aware that it was more openly performed amongst the mer but the dark magick scared her. 

“The other students were slightly afraid of him, some worried that he might summon a dremora lord to slaughter them in their sleep” Aicantar continued, rolling his eyes. “I found him interesting and asked him why he had been sent to the college, and he revealed he had been forced to attend by his family. 

[animalpetcel]

Ideal RHATO

Okay, so I’ve done some thinking. While Red Hood and the Outlaws was an interesting concept; give Jason friends and a team of his own, get him out of the Batfam Shadow, it’s been bogged down by L*bdell spotty writing and questionable Editorial decisions. So I’ve taken the time to think of what I would personally want the Outlaws to be.

First of all, I don’t believe that Jason would be better of if he remained solo. While he does deserve a good solo run other than UtH, the idea of permanently sequestering from creating meaningful, recurring relationships with other heroes is just repulsive to me. He should be allowed to have friends and people to talk to outside of the Batfamily guys, there’s only so many adventures he can have by himself before they all start sounding the same. You could even have him gaining friends as part of his character development.

Okay! So let’s begin

In my version, the Outlaws would be a more obvious antihero team. They take cases by those who feel that regular heroes can’t help them, that they won’t go far enough to achieve justice. The Outlaws won’t kill often, but it would usually be awful criminals like drug dealers, traffickers or those in charge, but if they don’t kill, they won’t be above dissing out harsh, lasting punishments to those who cross them. There could be the possibility of them being a team looking for redemption, but I’ve never really thought about them going in that direction.

Btw: This will be a hard reboot, everything from New52 to Rebirth regarding RHATO will be completely retconned, because Lobdell wrote almost all of them and despite what people want to believe most of it is bad save for some barely passable moments

Outlaw Members

Jason Todd

Can’t have the Outlaws without their infamous leader. Like I said above, I believe that having his own team can be a good thing for Jason, he can establish a history disconnected from his history with Bruce and actually start to move on. I’d imagine him being a reluctant leader, preferring to work alone but admitting that having people to rely on has made his mission a lot easier. He’s a very driven and calculated person, and after reading Arkham Knight Genesis, I have no doubt in his leadership skills and his ability to turn a ragtag group of antiheroes into a team to be reckoned with.

Idk if I’d keep his All-Caste stuff. I know that it was probably created to give his backstory something that stands out, since he’s the third Batfam member to have the League of Assassins in his backstory and isn’t the only one that’s died before, but he barely uses the All-blades or brings up the All-Caste to the point were you can omit it and don’t really have to do that much to replace it. At this point, I’d accept Talia making him train with Brother Blood over the All-Caste.

I’d probably say that the Lazurus pit Talia used to bring him back was kinda special, giving him a minor healing factor and increasing his strength, idk, something small.

Eddie Bloomberg

(I hate Tom King and this dialogue too but I wanted a recent image of him)

Did you know that unlike Roy Harper, Eddie was actually Jason’s best friend pre-reboot? Most people don’t because DC doesn’t care about using pre-established canon or developing its less popular heroes! 🙃

Okay, I used to be a huge fan of Jason and Roy’s friendship in New52 RHATO, but then I learned that Roy was originally Dick’s friends, that his personality was dumbed down for New52, Roy actually hates mercenaries and would never become one, they only used Roy because he was more popular and that most Titan/Roy friends actually hate his New52 counterpart and friendship with Jason. While I believe that Roy and be both friendship with Dick AND Jason (but in different ways. Dick is more of a close friend while he and Jason should have a more big brother kind of relationship), I have to admit that DC dropped the ball here, and it would be easier to just scrap everything instead of trying to make it work.

Eddie’s personality is actually quite similar to New52 Roy’s, and he and Jason already have unexplored history, so switching Roy with him won’t mess anything too much.

And now, I hear you ask “Ani, what about the Outlaw’s being an antihero group? Wouldn’t that make Eddie stand out?”, and I will reply “Don’t worry, I have a plan!”

Back when Eddie first got his powers, Neron, the king of hell at the time (?) wanted Eddie to be his protege, but Eddie refuses. But what if Neron was more forceful? Eddie could be offered, now powerless again because of the events of TT (but his death is retconned to just getting badly injured), to become Neron’s protege once again. With nothing left to lose (his relationship with Blue Devil is still in the fritz, Teen Titans no longer seem to give a damn and Rose & Jaime is still off doing their own things), he takes it. I guess he’s probably look different with more of Neron’s power coursing through his veins, but the point is that Outlaws become a “Fall from grace” for him. He’s trying to still be a hero, but as Neron’s influence continues to grow, his ability to tell right from wrong gets more and more clouded.

He’s the one to approach Jason with the idea of being a team, wanting to relive the “Good Ol’ Days” when they were younger and less bogged down with personal trauma. While Jason is reluctant, he admits that since being self-exiled from the Batfamily that it’s been kinda lonely, so he agrees, but only short-term. Eddie then segways into the next member of their burgeoning group–

Rose Wilson

While pre-reboot, Rose and Jason did not have the friendliest interactions, with her holding a blade to her throat while his brothers threatened him with a crime he never committed. Post-reboot, he and Rose seem to have a more “friendlier” relationship, but the Wilson family have been rebooted at least theee times in both New52 and Rebirth, so who knows if they even still know each other now,

Rose and Eddie were very close friends in Teen Titans, and I think that getting Rose away from the madness of her family and father could be good for her character.

Eddie manages to convince her to join the “Outlaws”, but like Jason, she goes into it thinking that it’ll be a one-time thing. She cares a lot about Eddie, and sticks with the team to make sure that he’s doing alright. She probably could have an arc were Nightwing confronts her on her work in the Outlaws (since the other heroes see them as white-hat mercenaries) since he mentored her in being a hero, so it could be about dealing with what other people expect of her.

Essence

While L*bdell might be basically a shit writer, he does create interesting concepts. With a better writer, Essence could be a very interesting character, watching from the shadows and judging whether or not the Outlaws are actually “good” people, before she eventually starts taking a more active role in helping them punish criminals.

While she would at first interact solely with Jason, asking him questions about his deeds and ordering him in what direction she feels is best, she would eventually introduce herself to the rest of the group. I think she’d get along best with Komand’r, while the others might test her absolutism, Black-And-White morality a bit.

Rankorr (Jack Moore)

I know that there’s some people who want Guy Gardner to be Jason’s lantern, but what about a lantern who is close to Jason in age and actually fits the Outlaw theme?

Jack Moore is a Red Lantern, not only a Red Lantern, but the first human lantern who is also the first Red Lantern to be capable of creating constructs. He struggles with his rage, and deep down, he wants to enjoy a normal life on earth.

Maybe after Red Lantern (retconning Lobo or if not, he’s brought back using Red Lantern Blood Magic), he decides that the RL’s are a bit too cult-like for him and tries to lay low on Earth, finishing his literature degree and opening up a small bookstore somewhere in London. He’s close with Guy, but still can’t/refuses to let go of his rage, so Jack is still a RL

Of course, keeping his rage at bay is hard work, and after witnessing police brutality one more time, he loses control.

The Outlaws were hired by the family of the victim to make the officers see justice, but after seeing Jack work, they realize that this might be their easiest case yet.

Afterwards, Jack tries to downplay the entire thing (before resorting to threats when the Outlaws won’t listen), but Jason eventually convinced him that his talents would be wasted just being a civilian (and that his rage will only get worse if he continues to just let it boil without an “outlet”) so he joins the team

Blackfire

I’ve read Komand’r’s backstory, I know how bad it looks. However, in a medium where retcons and reimaginings are features instead of bugs (and can benefit a character’s story if done right), I really think it could be possible to make her work.

After reading New52 RHATO, I began thinking that it could be so much better if not only Eddie took Roy’s spot, but also if Komand’r took Starfire’s, since I feel like she had more potential beyond “Kori’s evil disabled sister”, “War Criminal” and “Struggling queen of Tamaran”

First, I’d change her pre-reboot backstory so instead of taking over the Gordanians, she is instead captured by them after Starfire frees her from the Psions (Komand’r still hates her sister and refuses to follow her). Through her clever mind and manipulations, she manages to earn favor with Lord Damyn, feigning romantic interest. Of course, given Komand’r’s nature, she ends up killing and replacing him, but her rule doesn’t go over well and she is again recaptured, but this time she’s brought to Earth.

Realizing that she’s now trapped on the planet whete her sister has become a successful and popular hero, Komand’r is at first angry, and then conspires to free herself and take revenge on her sister (who she still blames for everything despite that not being the case).

The Outlaws bust the alien trafficking ring, and Komand’r, seeing her chance, decides to show off and make nice with them to eventually use them for her revenge.

She finds Eddie and Rankorr easy to manipulate, but she bumps Heads with Jason whenever she tries to take his role as leader away from him and finds Rose’s mind to be “weak”. Overtime however, she bonds with Jason over feeling inferior to their siblings, realizes that her anger shares Rankorr’s intensity, and grows a genuine friendship with Rose and Eddie

Oh yeah, and maybe she tries to make things right with Kori

Artemis Grace

What would the Outlaws be without the greatest Amazon to have ever lived? Nothing, that’s for sure.

While I don’t agree with Jaytemis (at least not yet), I have to admit that Jason would be a fool not to like her. She’s a cool, confident character with a lot of interesting lore behind her.

Her joining will probably be pretty close to canon. The Outlaws are tasked with going after Black Mask, and Jason decides to go undercover, as the Red Hood still has his fingers in various criminal pies. While investigating, he runs into Artemis, who is looking for the Bow of Ra, and rest is history.

I feel like she’ll get along really well with Rose and Komand’r and maybe she’ll date one. She’ll definitely view Eddie a bit dismissively, and she isn’t a huge fan of demons. Rankorr would probably come off as stuck up to her.

Bizarro

Anyone who knows me will know that I’m am not a huge fan of Bizarro clones. I consider them to be an overused concept (that sometimes feels as if it relies on gene superiority, but idk if I’ll ever fully process my dislike for them), and the fact that as the time I’m writing this, there are at least four currently in continuity does not enamor me with the concept more.

However, after re-reading RHATO a few times, I’ll admit that the Outlaws’ Bizarro has grown on me. Since he already kinda has a unique name (Bizz), all I think he needs is a more visually distinct costume (doesn’t even have to directly reference Superman, but I can go 50/50 on the backwards “S”)

The Outlaws getting Bizz is exactly the same as canon. I’d imagine that he and Eddie would be as close as brothers. While Rankorr might find Bizz’s way of thinking and speaking to be annoying, I’d think that Rankorr will eventually warm up to him and probably teach him how to read and help Artemis teach him. Komand’r and Rose will probably be less receptive to him, but who knows

August Heart

I’m a Godspeed fan first and human second, we’ve been knew.

In all seriousness, Godspeed is the perfect Rebirth era character for RHATO and the fact that he and Jason still haven’t met is why DC doesn’t have any rights.

Okay okay, but he’s honestly a perfect fit. Like Jason, he also kills when dealing with crimes, but he isn’t so good and knowing who’s guilty and who isn’t just yet.

This will probably be after Death of the Speedforce, with August finally making things right with Barry, but still not forgiving himself for everything that happened. Deciding to self-exile himself rather than go back to Iron Heights, August travels, trying to figure out what do to do next, trying to follow Barry’s rules (which he finds to be very wishy-washy) to the best of his ability.

Eventually, he learns that Black Hole is still running, and against his better instincts, he goes after them.

His trail of lightning destruction catches the eye of the Outlaws.

Barry, realizing that his best-friend might need someone who can actually be there all the time to help reign him in, Barry goes to the Outlaws and asks them if they can help him once they catch up to him

They do in the form of offering a spot on the team.

August is very self-assured (even if it is hiding a softer, more emotional center), but has proven to be able to work with others, so I can see the other Outlaws coming to like him. They might find him a little cocky/early to jump the gun, but still a trusted and valued member of the team.

Since every Robin has their own flash, it only makes sense to finally give Jason (and have them date) a speedster of his own, and it should be someone who fits his morals, and who else could Then the speedster fans literally call “The Red Hood of the Flashfam”?

Final Thoughts

Other possible members I would consider/accept are

Eradicator Superman

Koryak

Vanessa Kapatelis/Silver Swan lll

Simon Amal (Crux)

Danny Chase

Clone!Roy Harper

Connor Hawke

Orm Marvius

Man O’ War

Lagoon Boy

Scarlet

Zachary Zatara

Thomas Merlyn

Ragman

Bleez

Walter West

Even with a cast as sizable as the one I just listed, with a good enough writer, there could still a few minor side characters. I would personally want the them to be

Scarlet: Jason’s former sidekick. She could be either a civilian who he talks to get experience some normalcy or the leader of her own version of the Outlaws made of up the Generation Outlaws we meet in RHATO #37-40. Either way, it could contrast with Bruce and the way he (mis)treats his own sidekicks and family

Zachary Zatara: Eddie’s old friend who helped him get his devil powers. Zachary would definitely be worried over Eddie once again accepting Neron’s power and will want to try to help. Whether he suceeds or not will depend if the writers want to go in that direction

Isabel Ardila: She’s a nothing character, but there’s a small chance that with a better writer, she might gain an interesting personality or an actual purpose in RHATO

Talia Al Ghul: before the reboot, Talia was Jason’s mentor figure and even gave him a cool dagger. It would be so cool if we can bring that back and erase Morrison’s problematic charactization of her. Maybe the dagger she gives Jason could be an All-Blade or smth. They’d definitely take a few cases from her however

Batfam, Titans and respective groups: it would have to happen eventually. It could lead to some interesting, angst filled conversations. And who knows, maybe they’ll actually make progress with their issues

But this post has gone on long enough. I just really wanted to talk a bit about my ideal Outlaws team that I will never see anywhere except for my dreams because mass media hates me and DC still thinks that Lobdell deserves to write Jason 😔😭

[nerianasims]

Billboard #1s 1979

Under the cut.

I discuss Michael Jackson’s life and actions a little bit underneath here. So be warned if that’s something that will upset you.

The Bee Gees -- "Too Much Heaven" -- January 6, 1979

Uugh. When The Bee Gees weren't releasing bad, bloodless, falsetto disco, they were releasing bad, bloodless, falsetto lite "rock." Also the lyrics are about how love is soooo hard to get, so they're special since they have love, and yuck. Nonsense and glop.

Rod Stewart -- "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy" -- February 10, 1979

I laughed out loud when I saw this next on the list. People can't have taken it seriously in 1979, right? It was seen like "I'm Too Sexy", yes? Even though Rod Stewart was a "serious" singer -- come on, this is a ridiculous song. It isn't about the narrator; it's about two people meeting on a dance floor and then going to have what's probably a one-night stand. But when Rod Stewart sings the chorus, it sounds like it's about him. It's a highly unsexy and very silly song.

Gloria Gaynor -- "I Will Survive" -- March 10, 1979

The joy I feel listening to this song. It's the best disco song. The bright piano flourish opens to Gaynor's amazing voice and phenomenal singing ability. She sells her anger at the guy who's "back to bother" her, along with the assertion that she's now totally confident and is gonna do great without him, will all her life to live and all her love to give. The lyrics are great, which is incredibly rare for any dance song. The music is great. And Gaynor is perfect. You can belt it in the car and it drives people to the dance floor. Just an amazing, incredible song.

The Bee Gees -- "Tragedy" -- March 24, 1979

The real tragedy is that The Bee Gees shat up disco. What could it have been if not for their influence? There were disco singers and groups who escaped it, but Barry Gibb and Friends' clogging of the charts kept out so many worthy acts. Lots of synth on this song, and synth can be really cool (I'm a diehard fan of The Alan Parsons Project), but the Bee Gees made it boring and turgid. Then that damned falsetto. I don't care about the lyrics, I just want to not hear the Bee Gees again ever.

The Doobie Brothers -- "What A Fool Believes" -- April 14, 1979

The guy the song is about thinks he's going to get an ex back because she was nice when he met her again. He's a fool, and "no wise man has the power to reason away." The music's good, too, a sort of mild rock. "Yacht rock" I suppose. The sentiment is kinda country music though. Good song, anyway.

Amii Stewart -- "Knock on Wood" -- April 21, 1979

What is that in the background? A synth sound, obviously, but it sounds like -- a washboard? I have no idea, but it's annoying. This is a cover of an older soul song by Eddie Floyd that's pretty good, but they wreck it here. The amount of gunk clogging it up is painful. Also Amii Stewart doesn't modulate at all, her voice is a constant blare. Headache-inducing.

Blondie -- "Heart of Glass" -- April 28, 1979

The 80s are coming. Blondie does interesting things with synth here, the beat's irresistible, Debbie Harry's voice is unique, and the lyrics are about an ended relationship that was "a pain in the ass." Not some huge broken-hearted thing, despite the "heart of glass" lyric. Just... done, that didn't work, moving on. Not that the lyrics particularly matter here. It's all about the interesting, different-sounding music.

Peaches & Herb -- "Reunited" -- May 5, 1979

If synth can sound more synthetic than usual, that's how this song begins. It's about a couple getting back together, but it doesn't sound like they were ever in a lot of pain or that they're really excited now. There's some neat guitar stuff. It could be worse. But mostly it's bland.

Donna Summer -- "Hot Stuff" -- June 2, 1979

It's a disco song, but with a lot more rock in it than disco usually has. Maybe that's why it's survived so much better than most disco. The narrator wants one of her lovers (of whom she obviously has many) to answer the phone so that she can get laid. It's the ballad of Romance Sims. It's fun.

Bee Gees -- "Love You Inside Out" -- June 9, 1979

Well, ew. This guy's whining that the woman he loves has too many lovers but he's the one who will "love you inside out," whatever the hell that means. It sounds like a serial killer. She needs to dump him, and also probably move and change her name. And, of course, there's Barry Gibb's horrible orchestration and falsetto.

Anita Ward -- "Ring My Bell" -- June 30, 1979

Disco, of course. He's been gone for a while and she's singing to him "you can ring my bell." So, they're gonna celebrate his homecoming with lots of sex. The lines "You can ring my bell, ring my bell/ (Ring my bell/ ding-dong-ding)" repeat a couple hundred times. The background synth sounds are painfully repetitive. Like something on The Prisoner used to brainwash people. And Anita Ward sings in a Betty Boop-ish sort of childish voice that I also find annoying. It's not Bee Gees bad, but it's bad.

Donna Summer -- "Bad Girls" -- July 14, 1979

"Bad girls" are not the same as "sad girls." Sorry, this song might be fine or even good, but that one line has always bugged me way too much. So does the police whistle.

Chic -- "Good Times" -- August 18, 1979

Disco about how "happy days are here again" for now. The lyrics are obviously pretty shallow, but at least there is a line about how it won't last forever. That's not my problem anyway. My problem is that the chorus bores me, musically. Like, it hurts. There are two notes I think? And the beat is the same throughout. I always sort of ignored this song before, but on actively trying to listen to it, I have started to hate it. It doesn't interact well with my brain chemistry.

The Knack -- "My Sharona" -- August 25, 1979

This became a hit again when Reality Bites came out. So I danced in a convenience store to it my freshman year of college. We were "of the younger kind" then, considering I was 17. That made me like the song better -- it was about me! Rock isn't supposed to be clean, and you're really not supposed to take it as advice. The riff is amazing, and I love this song.

Robert John -- "Sad Eyes" -- October 6, 1979

I've never heard this song before. The music box sounding intro lasts a while and lulls you into complacency before the horrible falsetto kicks in. Not only extremely 70s white man falsetto, but an entitled brat of a man breaking up with a woman and being put out that she's looking at him with "sad eyes." Incredibly bad in an incredibly 70s way. I can see why I've never heard this song before. It's absolutely terrible.

Michael Jackson -- "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough" -- October 13, 1979

Sigh. All right, now that he's an adult, gotta tackle Michael Jackson. He was a rampant and, as far as we know, unrepentant child molester. He destroyed people in the most personal way possible short of actual murder. (Phil Spector is still worse.) He was murdered through at least extreme malpractice by his doctor. He was forced into stardom as a child himself. And he was a huge, massive, incredibly gigantic star, even after he became a punchline. I was never a big fan, but like most children of the 80s, I loved some of his songs and spent a lot of time doing the moonwalk, or as close as I could get. I feel an immense amount of pity for him, along with utterly despising him, along with admiring his talent, along with being sickened by the fact that Hollywood and the music industry knew and no one did anything about what he was doing. All in all, I end up at this place: Child stardom must end.

Okay, now for the music. This song takes forever to actually start. Also I have actually never heard it before today. Probably because it's falsetto. Jackson's falsetto is obviously far superior to Barry Gibb's, but it's still falsetto the whole song. The riff is great once it starts, and everything about the music should be good -- but, falsetto. The whole time, as far as I can tell. I can't listen to all of it. Whose idea was it that falsetto should ever be anything other than an occasional few bars? Was it Frankie Valli? I'm gonna blame Frankie Valli.

Herb Alpert -- "Rise" -- October 20, 1979

It's a jazz-funk instrumental and it's pretty good. Piano, guitar, trumpet, some kind of glittering thing -- xylophone? Bells? The people laughing like it's a laid-back party are annoying, but not enough to wreck the song. If this doesn't play on every cruise ship ever, they're missing a trick.

M -- "Pop Music" -- November 3, 1979

I saw the title, and thought I didn't know the song. Then I heard the first bars of the song and went, "OH this one." It's New Wave. I love a lot of New Wave, but this one's on the purposefully shallow end, rather than the Eurythmics end. The lyrics are nonsense, but the beat is pretty irresistable. Which makes it a dance song, whatever its intent. One of the lines is, "Dance in the supermarket," so it probably was intended to be danced to. In any case, I find it pretty forgettable, but fine.

The Eagles -- "Heartache Tonight" -- November 10, 1979

I've heard this song before, but not often. I'm not sure if it's about sex before a breakup or about cheating. Don Henley does not have Elvis' voice, though he seems to be trying to reach that level. Real power is required for the chorus, and Henley lacks it. If this were sung by Freddie Mercury, we'd have something. Queen also would have brought more musical interest generally. But as-is, it doesn't work for me.

The Commodores' -- "Still" -- November 17, 1979

Lionel Richie was still the frontman/ writer for The Commodores here. Should I explore why I can't stand Lionel Richie's music? I'd have to listen to it more to fully understand. It always sounds totally insincere to me. The songs themselves are too slow. This one doesn't have a bassline. It's so polished and gloopy. And in this song, that pause between "I love you" and "still" is both highly predictable and entirely phony. I managed to listen to the entire song, and I rolled my eyes throughout, but especially at that last whispered "still." Oh he's just so sad puh-leaze. Crying his way to the bank.

Barbra Streisand and Donna Summer -- "No More Tears" -- November 24, 1979

I hate Barbra Streisand's singing and like Donna Summer's. I wish this were just Donna Summer. If it were, I'd probably like the song. It's slow for almost 2 minutes, then becomes disco. Streisand isn't able to do as much self-loving in a fast dance song, but it's still there. I tried to find a version with just Donna Summer and failed. So, I dunno, the fact that I can actually listen to the whole thing makes me think it's the most tolerable song with Barbra Streisand in existence. But it would have been so much better without her.

Styx -- "Babe" -- December 8, 1979

Styx was prog rock, but watered-down, simplified prog-rock. Lite prog rock, as weird as that is. But they still had that massive theatricality of prog rock, which I like, and they were great for places like Pine Knob. Outside of those massive arenas, they don't work for me. Dennis DeYoung, the writer and singer of this song, belts the whole way through. Yeah, he hits the notes, but he doesn't seem to realize you're supposed to sometimes modulate, even on a power ballad. Meh.

Rupert Holmes -- "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)" -- December 22, 1979

If you take this song seriously, you're likely to hate it. It ain't that deep. It's a goofy song about a goofy thing -- both he and his wife are bored and want to cheat, so they write personal ads, and lo, they answer each other's personals! Though how that happens when they're the blandest Reaganite yuppies ever, I'm not sure. Maybe it's because they're both full of themselves ("if you have half a brain.") I enjoy this song because it is catchy, silly, and totally non-serious. I do not like pina coladas, btw.

BEST OF 1979: "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor. WORST OF 1979: "Love You Inside Out" by the Bee Gees

[shipping-receiving]

Fictober 2019 Day 20: “You could talk about it, you know?”

Rating: T | Word Count: 4026 Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire / Game of Thrones Relationship: Jaime Lannister / Brienne of Tarth Tags: Alternate Universe – Office Notes: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

(read on AO3)

//////

Hello, dear brother. Father is dispatching me to the Stormlands this weekend to ‘talk some sense into you’. The old bastard won’t even let me go on a work day. Fancy spending the entirety of Saturday in my hotel bar for said talking of sense?

Jaime reads Tyrion’s text and sighs. Actually, he sighed as soon as he saw Tyrion’s name pop up on his phone screen, before he even read the text.

He knows he should be happy to see his brother—and he is looking forward to seeing him again—but it’s also a reminder of all the things left unresolved back in King’s Landing.

And there’s also the small matter of how he’s supposed to meet Brienne on Saturday, too.

If he asks Tyrion if he’s free on Sunday instead, his brother will definitely start asking too many questions. Questions that Jaime doesn’t want to answer, not over text. He won’t be able to say that he has a work thing, because Tyrion will just say that technically they will be meeting for work, since they will purportedly be having a conversation about the future of Lannister Corp. And he won’t be able to say that he’s meeting a friend, because as far as his brother knows, he doesn’t have any friends here in the Stormlands. He doesn’t even have any friends back in the capital besides Addam.

(In any case, it’s not like he’d want Brienne to be characterised as just a ‘friend’, even in an evasive text to his brother. He is quite sure by now, after the past four Saturdays, that he would like her to be more than that.)

As Jaime is contemplating the likelihood of Tyrion buying the excuse that he’s signed up for a Saturday afternoon pottery class, another bubble of text pops up:

And by ‘the entirety of Saturday’, I mean, from after lunch. I’m arriving Friday evening, but I have other activities planned in which you will likely not wish to partake, and I don’t expect to be awake till noon at the earliest.

Of course he has other activities planned. Jaime is just glad Tyrion has given up on asking him to join in on those activities.

And by ‘said talking of sense’, I mean, not. Obviously.

Not that Jaime expected anything else from his brother, but he finds himself feeling relieved nonetheless. Sure, he types, simply, see you at 2 pm. The usual spot?

Nothing but the best hotel in the Stormlands for the Lannisters, Tyrion replies.

Now, to text Brienne. Jaime considers telling her the truth—she knows the gist of what’s happening in King’s Landing, after all—but he’s been wondering for days if he said too much, back on Tarth. Not because he doesn’t want her to know, but because it’s just so… much. Even just the gist of it. Even without having explained his relationship with his father, or Tyrion, or—hells—Cersei. As if any of those three relationships, the last one in particular, could be adequately described in mere words.

Brienne had said she’d be happy to listen. But she doesn’t have any clue what she’d have to listen to, if he really told her everything. He’d never had to explain the family to anyone outside the family before. Even Addam has had a front row seat to the Lannister family drama since they were children. Jaime had never been put in a position where he’d have to explain. Or perhaps it’s more accurate to say that he’d been avoiding those positions his entire life. Now he finds himself actually wanting to explain everything to Brienne, though he’d really only spent four days with her, effectively. They hardly interact in the office, besides all the times he’s contrived to walk by her cubicle. He has a drawer full of useless photocopies to show for it.

He thinks of how easy it is to be around Brienne, despite the nerves—hers and his. He has an inkling that she might like him well enough. She laughs and rolls her nice blue eyes at him, and he may have caught her staring more than a few times, especially on Tarth, when he wore The White Shirt™. But he also thinks of how she stood up abruptly in the middle of the meadow, in what he thought was the middle of their conversation. We’re going to miss the sunset, she had said, though they had plenty of time.

It’s been days, and he still can’t figure out what had made her do that. It couldn’t have been the family stuff, could it? She hadn’t seemed perturbed when he told her. She’d only stood up when he told her he had been hurt that she had thought he looked average. What could possibly be so offensive about that?

Best to err on the side of caution, Jaime decides, and not tell her about Tyrion. He lies and says a client is in the Stormlands this weekend, and asks if she’s free on Sunday. It takes her longer than usual to reply, and he’s almost tempted to march over to her cubicle and just ask her in front of everyone. When her text comes through—I’m meeting Margaery on Sunday. Sorry 😕—he has a flare-up of that version of himself he thought he left in King’s Landing. Suddenly he feels quite inclined to fire Margaery Tyrell, though that wouldn’t change her plans on the weekend, he supposes.

Brienne only sent a slanted mouth face emoji, which seems to suggest that he should probably send a slanted mouth face emoji in return, but he sends her a sad face instead, the most pathetic one he can find. It’s an accurate description of how he’ll be feeling on the weekend, he expects.

On Saturday, Jaime walks into the hotel bar a little after two. He can’t see Tyrion on first glance, but he heads in the direction of the same booth they sat in the last time they were both in this bar. He expects his brother will already be there with two glasses of whiskey at the ready. Tyrion is unpredictable in many aspects, but in the aspect of hotel bars and whiskey, he’s a creature of habit. True enough, as Jaime approaches the booth, he sees Tyrion sitting there, already halfway through his own whiskey.

“Tyrion,” Jaime acknowledges, as he slides into the seat.

“Ah, Jaime.” Tyrion raises his glass in greeting. “How’s life in self-imposed exile?

“Oh, don’t make it sound so dramatic,” Jaime replies, as he rotates his own glass on the table. “I’m not even that far away. I half-expected Father to send Clegane to physically drag me back to King’s Landing.”

“Not a good look for the company, I’d expect.” Tyrion takes another sip of his whiskey. “Not-far-away as you are, Father has been even more curmudgeonly than usual since you essentially told him you’d prefer to spend the foreseeable future in one of our less important regional offices. How’s that going, by the way?”

Jaime exhales and lifts his glass to his lips. The liquid burns as it flows down his throat. “I thought you said we weren’t going to be doing any ‘talking of sense’.”

“I’m just interested in my big brother’s life, that’s all,” Tyrion says offhandedly. “I haven’t seen you in months.”

“Again, this office isn’t really all that far from King’s Landing. You could have come for a visit, even without Father commanding you to descend upon the Stormlands.”

Tyrion wrinkles his nose. “I find this region quite… what’s the word for it. Provincial. Too much sea, and grass, and wind, and so forth.”

“You still managed to partake in your activities, didn’t you?”

“There’s always something in every city,” Tyrion smirks. “But I’m still far too attached to King’s Landing, even though it has Father and Cersei in it. And our dear brother-in-law, now, who’s completely insufferable in his own Targaryen way. I’m still perplexed about how Cersei was planning to have him go through with that whole changing-his-name-to-Lannister thing.” He inches closer to Jaime. “By the way, I have my suspicions that he’s not being entirely faithful—”

“Stop.” Jaime places his glass down on the table with a bit more force than he should have. “I don’t want to know anything that isn’t relevant to how the business should be run here.”

“You know as well as I do, Jaime, that everything that happens in our family affects the way our business is run.” Tyrion tilts his head at him. “... You’re really not planning to come back?”

Jaime leans back in his seat, and addresses the light fixture above their table. “Not if I can help it. I don’t think it’s up to me, though, in the long term. Father will find a way, I expect.”

“Indeed.” Tyrion lifts his empty glass. “Another round?”

Jaime looks at the shallow pool of whiskey in his own glass, and nods his head. His brother signals to the bartender.

“I don’t know how you can stand it, Tyrion,” Jaime murmurs, as they wait for their drinks. Tyrion has endured far worse than Jaime from both his father and sister—for his physical appearance, yes, but maybe more so for having lived while their mother had passed.

“What can I say? I love drama.” And power, Jaime thinks, and strategy, and everything that comes with running a large corporation from its highest stratum. “And there are still many benefits to being a Lannister in King’s Landing. Benefits I intend to enjoy for as long as possible.” The bartender comes with two more glasses of whiskey, just then. “Anyway, who knows how things will go, with the company? I’m really quite happy to bide my time. Assuming you don’t have a change of heart, that is.”

Jaime chafes at that suggestion. “I highly doubt it. If I return to the head office, it will not be of my own volition.”

“Brother,” Tyrion says, gentler than Jaime’s ever heard. “You could talk about it, you know? With me.”

“Talk about… what?” Jaime vaguely remembers a time when they used to talk about everything, though Tyrion is some seven years younger. Then, things got so complicated. More complicated than they used to be, at least. It was all part of growing up, for a Lannister.

“I don’t know,” Tyrion shrugs. “Anything. Why you chose to stay here, of all places.”

“Our family isn’t reason enough?”

“Yes, sure, that’s why you’re not in the capital. But why here? Why the Stormlands? You could go off to Oldtown. Our office there is pretty much comparable in scale to King’s Landing. Or Lannisport, even. Father would be less annoyed by both of those, I’d think.”

“Since when do you care about how annoyed Father would be?” Jaime replies, and Tyrion tips his head in agreement. “Anyway,” he continues, “Oldtown doesn’t have—”

And then he stops. He didn’t mean to. He was thinking of her, at the back of his mind, and it just came out.

Tyrion is looking at him curiously. “Oldtown doesn’t have…?”

“Look.” Jaime is suddenly acutely aware of how every slight movement causes the leather seat to squeak beneath him. “You can’t tell anyone else about this.”

“My lips will be sealed now and forever,” Tyrion promises, drawing his index finger and thumb across his mouth.

“Okay,” Jaime sighs. “I’ve… met someone. I think.”

“A ‘someone’! And this is a dateable ‘someone’?”

“I think. I’m not entirely sure she’s open to it.”

“Still. A dateable ‘someone’ not mandated by Cersei!” Tyrion lifts his glass as if in toast. “I never thought I’d see the day!”

“She would very much not be mandated by Cersei.” Jaime doesn’t want to think about how much control Cersei used to have over his life. “She’d not even be approved by Cersei.”

“Interesting, very interesting. Maybe that’s why you like her so much.”

Jaime looks at him coldly. “I’d thank you not to reduce it to that.”

“Calm down, brother, I’m only joking.” They both know he wasn’t. “What’s she like, then? Miss Someone of the Stormlands? What’s her name? How did you meet?”

“Her name is Brienne. She works for us. At the Stormlands office, I mean.”

“Ah, an office romance.”

“I guess you could say that.” Jaime can feel the corners of his mouth curving upwards. “She’s tall. Taller than me, even. Eyes bluer than you’ve ever seen, and blushes far too often for her own good, but it’s… charming. She’s quiet at first, but easy to talk to, once you get her to open up. She listens to me—I mean, she listens to me talk, not that she obeys me, and it’s—it’s not just… it doesn’t feel like it’s because of our last name. She laughs at my stupid jokes, or tries her hardest not to.”

And then, Jaime remembers one crucial point he’s failed to mention. “Oh. And the first time we spoke… she punched me in the face.”

“She what?!” Tyrion is practically splayed across the table in anticipation of this story. How many whiskeys did he have before Jaime arrived? “Why the hells did she do that and why is she already the best person ever?”

“So I may have gotten drunk at an office party,” Jaime winces. “And I may have told her she was ugly.”

“Is she?”

“That’s—you’re missing the point. I shouldn’t have said that. It was cruel.”

Tyrion looks impressed. “Bra-vo, Jaime. You know what that is?” He lifts his glass—already empty again—in another toast. “Personal. Growth. The Stormlands must be rubbing off on you, though I don’t remember the people here being particularly known for their niceness.”

“Alright, calm down, brother. I’m not that much of an asshole.” He can feel its untruth as soon as the sentence is out of his mouth.

Tyrion gives him a look that says, you can be, as he signals to the bartender for another glass. “Why did you tell her that, then?”

“Look, I was drunk, as I said. Cersei—she sent me a barrage of very angry texts that day. And I heard—” Jaime pauses, and takes a sip of his whiskey.

“You heard…?” Tyrion encourages.

“I heard that Brienne thought I looked average,” he mumbles. Gods, this is embarrassing.

“No,” Tyrion exhales, all exaggerated dismay, and puts his hand to his chest in mock outrage. “You? Average? Say it ain’t so, Jaime.”

“Oh, shut up. She doesn’t think that, anyway, I found out later. But I insulted her, and… she punched me. Gave me a black eye. She has a mean right hook, actually.”

“Gods be good, I love her already,” Tyrion exclaims, as he takes his next glass from the waiting bartender. “When’s the elopement? Please let me be at the ceremony. Do it tomorrow, I’m still here tomorrow.”

“Hells, Tyrion, we haven’t even kissed. We haven’t even held hands. We’ve been out a few times, but I’m not even sure they’re dates.”

“How could you not be sure?” Tyrion is giving him a look that Jaime would be right to interpret as, are you both twelve years old? “They’re dates, or they’re not.”

“Okay, so they feel like dates, to me. But we’ve never actually… clarified.”

Tyrion plasters his palms to his face. “Gods, Jaime, I forget that you’ve never actually had to ask a woman out. You were the one that asked?”

“Not… exactly.” Jaime thinks of how Cersei had always just—arranged things for him. Things that never got very far, or lasted very long. “I may have asked her to show me around the Stormlands. We’ve been… sightseeing.” He swishes the last two drops of his second whiskey in his glass.

“I’ll take it ‘sightseeing’ isn’t a euphemism for anything. So, just regular tourist stuff, or…?”

“Mostly.” He thinks it’s probably wise not to mention how much cheese he still has in his fridge from that farmers’ market. “But she took me to her island last weekend.”

“Her island? Jaime, is she rich? Like, proper rich? Not that I’m recommending asking Father for his blessing for your union, but he’d be—well, I’m not sure he’s constitutionally capable of being over the moon. But whatever’s closest to that for the old bastard.”

“No, she isn’t rich. Her ancestors were Evenstars of Tarth, back when that title still existed. All her family has left now is a decent-sized house and the respect of the island’s small population.”

“Alright, we’re right back to the elopement then.”

Jaime needs another drink. “Tyrion, I was serious when I said we haven’t even held hands.” Hells, he needs two drinks. It’s his turn to signal to the bartender for another two glasses.

“Hmm. You think she likes you, though? Despite the punching?”

“I think we’re quite past that, if she actually brought me to her island.” Jaime shushes the little voice in his head that tells him otherwise. “But she’s—I don’t know what she is. Nervous. Afraid of something. Every time I feel like I want to—I don’t know, ask her out on a date, a proper one, or—or even kiss her—” Gods, he had wanted to kiss her in that meadow, “I just get this feeling that I shouldn’t. Part of that is, it’s me, I know, but part of it is just this feeling that she might… crumble. Collapse. If I even tried any of that.” Jaime leans back in his seat again, stretches out his legs under the table. “I tried to compliment her eyes, multiple times, and she would blush and thank me, but it also felt like… she wanted to dig a hole in the ground and hide there.”

“Right.” Some measure of understanding seems to be dawning in Tyrion’s eyes. “You said she was ugly, didn’t you?”

“I said I called her ugly,” Jaime snaps. “And I shouldn’t have.”

The bartender brings two glasses, and Tyrion helps himself to one before Jaime can protest. His brother hasn’t even finished his last drink.

“Okay, relax. I’ll work from the assumption that she’s at least plain, then. And you’re… not. Maybe there’s something in that that’s making her scared. You’re very—” Tyrion waves his hand over Jaime as he searches for the right word, and settles for: “You’re not average.”

“Wow, thank you so much for that glowing compliment.”

“Hells, you don’t need praise on your looks from your own brother, do you? You’re so beautiful, dear brother, the handsomest in the land, your golden hair glitters in the sunlight and your green eyes shine brighter than emeralds—”

Jaime shudders and holds up his palm. “Okay, I get it.”

“Jaime, take it from me,” Tyrion declares, spreading his arms. “Those of us who, shall we say, tend towards the unconventional, physically. We’ve faced cruelty our entire lives, intentional or not.” The brothers share a look, then; Jaime is more than aware of what Tyrion had to experience, not least from their own family. “It’s only natural that we treat the positive attention of other people, especially beautiful people, with suspicion. She’s probably just trying to protect herself, that’s all.”

“What should I do then?” Jaime groans. “Disfigure myself?” He lifts his glass to his mouth and swallows far too much whiskey in one go. How is this glass close to empty already? He doesn’t remember drinking from it at all.

“I’m—I’m going to hope you weren’t being serious, Jaime. And far be it from me to give you any advice on entering a committed relationship.” Tyrion stops for a while, as if to take a breath. He’s thought of Tysha, Jaime knows. It’s the only real relationship his brother has ever had, but their father had put a stop to that soon enough. She’s not good enough for the Lannisters, he had said. Not even for Tyrion.

“My advice would be,” Tyrion continues, after a beat, “give her some space to breathe, but not too much. Show her that you care, that you think of her, that she makes you happy. Encourage her—gently—when she shows any interest. Maybe actually ask her out on a real date, brother, if she doesn’t ask you first.”

“You think she might ask me first?” Jaime can’t imagine Brienne ever saying those words. Or even texting them.

“Who knows what’s going on in her mind. When are you next meeting her?”

“I was supposed to meet her today,” Jaime says, sadly. “But then you told me you were coming.”

“How about tomorrow?”

“She can’t make it.” He leans forward and bangs his head on the table. How many glasses of whiskey has he had again?

“Gods, you are far too devastated by this,” Tyrion laughs. “You’ve really got it bad, brother.”

“I know,” Jaime sighs into the woodgrain.

“Well,” Tyrion pats him on the shoulder. “Whenever you next see her in person. Ask her on a date, Jaime. Using that word. Clarity is key.”

“Okay. I will.”

Jaime sits back up again, and is overtaken by an urge to laugh.

“What now?” Tyrion must think he’s gone mad. Mad by way of Brienne. And also whiskey.

“I guess you did talk some sense into me, didn’t you? Just not the sense that Father wanted.”

“I suppose I did,” Tyrion chuckles.

They spend the rest of that whiskey-soaked afternoon together, until the afternoon stretches into the evening and into the night. It’s nice to do this, just the two of them, away from King’s Landing, away from the rest of the family. He even stays the night in Tyrion’s suite, though that might have been more a result of inebriation than any kind of brotherly bond.

He doesn’t text Brienne for the whole of Saturday, and he tells himself he’s giving her a bit of space, like Tyrion suggested. The truth is, Jaime needs the rest of Saturday to wrap his head around that whole conversation.

But Sunday comes around, and he has a few pictures from Tarth that he hasn’t sent her yet, including his favourite of the photos he took of her from that day. She’s standing in the grass against the blue sky, and she looks comfortable, human, nothing other than herself. Yet there’s something ethereal about her at the same time—to Jaime, at least. He wasn’t sure he’d wanted to send this to her at first—wasn’t sure how she’d react—but Tyrion said to let her know that he cares, and thinks of her, didn’t he?

So he sends it to her, along with a few other images, before he can ruin it by thinking too hard about it. Brienne doesn’t reply; probably busy with Margaery, he expects. He spends the rest of the afternoon trying to ignore his phone.

Then, around five, he finally gets a text from Brienne. It doesn’t acknowledge the photos, but this—this is better.

Hey, her text says. I know this is really last minute. But are you free for dinner tonight?

Dinner. Just dinner. That sounds very much like a date to him, though she didn’t mention the word. So she did ask him first. Assuming this is a date, of course.

As Jaime types his reply—he’ll pick her up at seven, he decides, he’s never done that before—he smiles to himself as he adds a happy face emoji to the end of his message. He thinks he’ll ask about it later, using that word. Is this a date, Brienne?, he’ll say. Maybe he’ll tuck her hair behind her ear as he does it, let his finger linger on her heated cheek as she blushes. As touches go, it might be nothing compared to a kiss. Or it might be far more intimate than a kiss could ever be. He’ll do it regardless. Clarity is key, after all.

“You could talk about it, you know?” Tyrion had said yesterday, and though he hadn’t meant it for this particular situation, Jaime thought the advice was sound. They could talk about it, him and Brienne—about sightseeing, and dating, and all the things that come after. They will.

But first, he has to pick her up at seven. She’s just texted him her address. He’s about to look up the route when his phone buzzes again.

See you at 7 😊

[diveronarpg]

Congratulations, KYLIE! You’ve been accepted for the role of BENVOLIO. Admin Julie: If I could, I’d wax poetry over the intricacies that came from reading your application for Bellamy. From the inherent bravery that comes from being kind in a world that eats kindness whole, to having to learn how to survive in that sort of environment, you’ve enraptured us with Bellamy’s conflict and narrative. Your writing sample captured an emotion note often seen in Verona: panic, terror, and worse, acceptance. The seven stages of grief, compounded into one man? It’s awe-inspiring and heartbreaking on one. We cannot wait to see where you’ll take him.  Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

OUT OF CHARACTER

Alias | Kylie

Age | 25

Preferred Pronouns | she/her

Activity Level | 5-6, the holidays have been a busy time for me, but now that they are coming to a close my activity should only go up.

Timezone | mst

Triggers | already listed!

How did you find the rp?  | I am a member who loves it dearly.

Current/Past RP Accounts | @ronanivarsson @nickborisov

IN CHARACTER

Character | Bellamy Santo-Domingo, Benvolio

What drew you to this character? |

I was drawn to Bellamy because I was thinking about the idea of heroism in Verona, and came to the conclusion that he must surely be the closest thing that Verona has to a real “hero” or heroic figure–what could possibly be more admirable than advocating for peace in a city where it is universally acknowledged that peace, that goodness, cannot thrive? I began comparing him to classical heroes like Aneas, who was divinely tasked with building a new city from the ashes of an old one, who was able to maintain his epithet of pious even as his city burned and the blood of his people was spilled. Because of his relationships with Marcelo and with Roman, both Achilles figures in their own right, I compared him to Patroclus–in the same way that Patroclus put on the armor of Achilles and went out to fight the Trojans, Bellamy has learned to put on the same armor that Roman and Marcelo wear in order to better protect them.

These comparisons have merit–but I think it would be a mistake to allow Bellamy to be so easily defined. I think a lot of contradictions exist within him–his banner is peace, he has cried and cried for it until he has lost his voice, but I think he also holds a lot of anger in his heart. He is angry that he seems to be the only one who can see where all of the destruction will lead, he is angry that the people he loves are so willing to gamble with their lives, he is angry at the fact that none of this is what he would have chosen for himself. I also think he is both very self sacrificing, as all heroes must be, but also very selfish. He would willingly give his life for Marcelo or Roman, or if he thought his death would mean something in terms of bringing peace to Verona–but at the same time, I think he would also willingly leave it all and go back to wandering, to make that choice for himself and shed the uniform the Montagues handed to him and ordered him into.

I also just enjoyed all the potential that exists within him–what is the difference between the person he would like to be, the person that he sees himself as, and the person he has to be in order to survive in Verona? He is an Atlas, bearing the weight of an entire city on his shoulders, but surely even Atlas cried out in pain, began to curse the gods at some point? How much blood must he shed in his quest for peace? Will there come a point where he has to turn his back on the people that he loves, on the lives that they lead?

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? |

DEATH DOESN’T DISCRIMINATE BETWEEN THE SINNERS AND THE SAINTS | I’m very interested in Bellamy’s relationship with the violence of the Montagues–he is a character that is defined by his goodness, by his desire for peace over violence, but I don’t think that makes him a soft character necessarily. I would love to investigate how far both he and his convictions could be pushed, where his point of no-return might be. Would he kill for them? Would he be willing to torture someone? If he is willing, how does he justify it in his mind? Is it a case of some blood being necessary in the quest to bring peace to Verona? How would he handle it if Roman or Marcelo specifically asked him to commit an act of violence in their name? Is there a point where he would consider himself too far gone, too far lost, too much of a sinner?  

IF THERE’S A REASON I’M STILL ALIVE | One of the things that really interests me is the relationships that Bellamy has with Roman and Marcelo. He came back to Verona because his mother asked, because he felt a sense of familial obligation, yes—but he also came back because he was worried about his brothers. They are the reason he stays, the reason he wants peace in this city—he wants to see them grow old, see them have faith in something other than the blood. I would love to investigate how far he’s willing to go for them, what kind of situations does he have to bail them out of? Would there ever come a point where he would decide that he’s more dedicated to his cause than to the two of them? Is there any resentment between them because of Bellamy’s dedication to peace, to opposing the organization that brought the three of them together?

THERE ARE THINGS THAT THE HOMILIES AND HYMNS WON’T TEACH YOU | I’m very interested in Bellamy’s job as a police officer, especially since it isn’t a job that he picked for himself—I was very interested in the phrasing in his biography, in the use of the word “posing” when talking about his position as a law enforcement officer. Does he feel like he’s wearing a costume, when he wears that uniform? How dedicated is he to the work? He wants to help people, but can he balance that with doing the bidding of the Montagues? What would he have chosen for himself instead? How does he interact with the other officers who are Capulets?

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | Yes, if his death really meant something–but I’m also kind of attached to him suffering the same fate as his namesake, of being the only one left alive with the carnage of the very thing he had fought so hard to prevent.

IN DEPTH

He drops his keys three times before he manages to stop his hands from shaking. It takes another three attempts before he’s able to unlock the door to his apartment, three heavy footed and stumbling steps before he is inside and able to collapse his weight against the wall of the entryway, before he is able to slide to the floor and hide his face behind his hands without the fear of being seen.

Because if anyone saw him right now, there would surely be more questions about Bellamy Santo-Domingo, more doubts about the soft hearted boy who surely doesn’t have the same stomach for blood, the same singular eye fixed on his own divinely appointed destiny, that his friends have. He’s certain that’s why Damiano had asked it of him, had filtered it down through Pandora who had said it as though it was just another task, another meaningless item to be efficiently checked off a list. If Bellamy could kill some no-name dealer who thought himself brave enough to sell on Don Montague’s territory, then there could be no more questioning his loyalty—to his family and to the Montagues as a whole. He would finally be equal to Roman, to Marcelo—an unquestioned part of the future that the two of them would build.

And he had almost done it, hadn’t he? He’d had the man dead to rights in the darkness of an abandoned warehouse, had the cold steel of his standard issue pistol pressed against the man’s temple–he’d even allowed him to say one last prayer to his God, though the words had been half choked out through sobs, and had fallen on ears both unqualified and unworthy to hear them. All that remained was to pull the trigger, to force his fingers into applying the specific amount of pressure that would end the man’s life.

His hands had been suprisingly steady then, the muscles of his jaw had been clenched but unwavering, his eyes had been cold and unfeeling–the very model of a soldato, someone that Damiano Montague could have been proud to call family, something like a son. He could have done it, he could have left the man to bleed out onto the cement and dedicated himself to finding the bottom of as many bottles as it took to render the memory of it nothing but haze and the aftertaste of copper. He would have been fine, in the same way that everyone in Verona is only ever fine–in the same way that anyone who has ever taken another life can never be good again.

In that moment, Bellamy Santo-Domingo made the radical decision to be something other than fine for the rest of his life. He lowered the gun.

He told the man to get out of Verona, that the next person who came for him would not be in possession of the same kindness.

It was then that his hands had started shaking.

Bellamy was certain that Damiano had meant the whole excersise as a test of his loyalty, to the Montague cause, to the actions that would be nessecary if they were going to win the war he was waging against Cosimo Capulet. He had meant to see if Bellamy could be hardened, if the soul of the poet could be worn away by a continually crashing sea of blood and made into a new and more useful shape. It was why he had merely nodded when Pandora had issued the command, instead of challenging her as he normally did. He had wanted answers to the same questions, and tonight he had received them.

On the floor of his apartment, Bellamy Santo-Domingo sobs into his hands. He sobs in a way that is anthetical to the very foundations that Verona is built on–he sobs unashamedly, as a howling prayer of thanks to God, not because he is overcome with tragedy. He sobs because the heart that beats inside of his chest, that stubbornly hopes and cries for something better for the people that he loves, is not so easily vanquished. He sobs because above all else, in spite of the war raging outside of his window, he has remained loyal to that hope, to the idea that peace is possible. He knows the metric by which he will be measured now, and it is not the number of lives that he takes in the name of Montague, it is not the amount of cruelty that he inflicts–it will be the number of lives that he saves, the world that he builds for the people that he loves.

There is no blood to wash off of his hands, to stain the porcelain of the bathroom sink rust colored for weeks on end. There is only sleep to be had, a new day to be lived beginning to be visible over the horizion. There is a war to be waged, and he will need the rest if he is to continue to stand between the two sides underneath his own banner, if his voice and the strength of his words is to fly between bullets and knife blades until both can be set down. He wipes at his eyes and gets to his feet, and Bellamy Santo-Domingo laughs. He cannot wait to begin.

Extras: pinterest board x

[wrckhvck]

Tokyo: Hogwarts AU

       (   lowkey  based  off  of  james  and  lily  potter’s  seventh  year;   elena  is  head  girl  and  damon  is  head  boy  )

            when  their  hogwarts  letters  arrive  over  the  summer,  it’s  not  a  surprise  to  see  one  of  the  salvatore  brothers   has  a  head  boy  badge  enclosed  in  the  envelope.  the  surprise  is  which  brother  –  DAMON,   the  slytherin,  the  troublemaker,  the  one  who  probably  spent  more  time  in  detention  the  year  previous  than  on  the  quidditch  pitch.  maybe  that’s  the  trade  off;   stefan’s  gryffindor’s  quidditch  captain,   and  damon’s  the  one  left  to  pursue  less  FUN  endeavors  in  their  final  school  year.    

          “  dumbledore’s  finally  lost  his  marbles. ”   he  remarks,  turning  the  badge  over  in  his  hands.  he  thinks  that  maybe  there’s  a  small  part  of  him  that  feels  pride  but  he  mostly  believes  it’s  an  error  –  that  he’ll  turn  up  on  the  first  day  and  someone  will  rip  it  from  his  robes  and  pin  it  on  its  rightful  owner.    the  letter  says  damon  though  …  and  as  far  as  he  knows,  mistakes  like  this  have  never  been  made.   

          “  or  maybe  he’s  trying  to  keep  you  so  busy,  brother,  you  don’t  have  time  to  make  everyone  else’s  lives  hell. ”  stefan  smirks,  shoves  his  shoulder  as  he  heads  to  the  door.  “  c’mon,  let’s  practice.  we  might  play  for  opposing  teams,  but  we’ve  both  got  to  be  at  the  top  of  our  games.  ”    it’s  been gryffindor  vs  slytherin  in  the  finals  the  last  three  years  …  all  of  which  slytherin  has  won.      damon  smirks,  calls  out  after  him.   “  speak  for  yourself.   i  could  fly  blindfolded  and  we’d  STILL  win.  ”   he  ducks  a  curse  that  flies  by  his  head,  spares  one  last  look  at  the  badge  before  heading  out  into  the  gardens.  he  doesn’t  give  much  thought  to  who  his  head  girl  will  be  until  they  arrive  at  kings  cross  station  weeks  later.   too  little,  too late.

* * *

      he  goes  with  stefan  to  the  prefect’s  compartment  on  the  train,  catching  a  few  strange  looks  that  are  sent  his  way.   his  head  boy  badge  is  hidden  with  a  charm,  will  be  activated  with a  flourish  as  soon  as  someone  —     he’s  broken  off  mid-thought  by  an  unimpressed  looking  elena  gilbert.   pinned  to  her  chest  is,  of  course,   a  head  girl  badge.    for  fuck’s  sakes. 

         it  isn’t  just  that  they  can’t  stand  each  other.   it  isn’t  that  she  used  to  date  his  brother,  or  that  he  once  knocked  her  brother  off  his  broom  with  his  beater’s  club  in  a  match  against  gryffindor.  it’s  a  combination  of  events  that  have  culminated  over  their  hogwarts  career.   he  couldn’t  say  what  it  was  –  though  if  he’s  honest,  he  thinks  some  of  it  is  unavoidable:   slytherin  vs  gryffindor  drama  –   but  there’s  easily  no  one  in  the  entire  castle  he  could  work  less  amicably  with  than  elena.   he  is,  for  lack  of  a  better  word,  fucked.  

    “  you’re  not  supposed  to  be  back  here,  damon.  ”   she  levels  him  with  a  hard  stare,  motioning  to  the  compartment.   “  prefects  and  heads  only.   you’ll  have  to  go  sit  with  your  friends. ”   her  nose  wrinkles.   it’s  no  secret  she  hates  his  housemates,  especially  the  few  he  hangs  around  with  on  the regular.  katherine  and  elena’s  hatred  for  each  other  is  legendary,  even  worse  after  she  found  out  stefan  had  ‘  accidentally  ’  been  tricked  into  dating  both  of  them.   damon  doesn’t  even  begin  to  try  to  understand  their  relationship.   for  twins,  the  two  couldn’t  be  any  different.   the  only  person  he’d  really  claim  as  a  friend  is  enzo,  or  maybe  alaric  …  but  he’s  a  ravenclaw  and  one  of  the  few  people  who  knows  about  damon’s  head  boy  status.    he’s  snickering  from  behind  elena,  his  girlfriend  jo  looking  like  the  cat  that  ate  the  canary.  for  a  hufflepuff,  she’s  surprisingly  devious.   it’s  not  surprising  that  ric’s  already  spilled  the  beans.

         “  oh,  my  bad.  did  i  forget  to  tell  you  –   stefan,  did  i  forget  to  tell  her  ?  ”   stefan,  to  his  credit,  refuses  to  engage.   shakes  his  head,  tells  him  he’s  not  getting  in  the  middle  of  this.    “  i  actually  am  welcome  here  because  ...  would  you  look  at  that.  ”   he  taps  his  wand  against  the  front  of  his  robes,  the  badge  now  full  on  display  for  all  to  see.    “  i’m  your  head  boy.  ”     

           silence  stretches  throughout  the  cabin.   for  a  minute,  damon  is  sure  the  angry  vein  on  elena’s  forehead  is  going  to  lose  its  fight  and  give  in.   instead  she  grounds  her  foot  into  the  floor,  forces  a  smile,  and  grabs  his  hand.   “  that’s  great.  hey,  we  should talk  about  our  duties.  ”   before  he  has  a  chance  to  say   a  word,  she’s  tugged  him  out  into  the  hallway  and  her  hands  smack against  his  chest.    “  tell  me  what  you  did,  salvatore.  tell  me  how  you  –  how  you  tricked  your  way  into  this.   did  you  bewitch  the  professors  ?   use  polyjuice  to  have  a  decent  person  advocate  for  you  ?  it  doesn’t  add  up.  there’s  no  way  anyone  with  half  a  brain  would  think  YOU  are  fit  to  lead  the  students  …  to  be  a  leader.  ”

             he’s  had  the  same  thoughts,  but  he  didn’t  need  to  hear  her  repeat  them.  his  features  cool  as  he  wrenches  back.   “  i’m  not  the  one  moaning  in  the  corridor  about  how  unpleasant  my  co-head  is.  ”   he  reminds  her.   “  be  careful  you  don’t  fall  off  that  pedestal  you’re  teetering  on.  ”     he  flashes  a  smile;   all  teeth,  fake,  before  heading  into  the  compartment.   

         they  don’t  say  another  word  to  each  other  the  entire  journey  back  to  school.   

* * *

    “  this  is  where  you’ll  be  staying.  ”   professor  dumbledore  guides  them  down  a  hallway  off  the  great  hall.   “  there’s  an  office  through  here.  you  can  use  it  for  paperwork,  or  for  meeting  with  your  prefects.    yes,  mr.  salvatore  ….  there  will  be  paperwork …  and  no,  you  can’t  leave  it  all  to  ms.  gilbert.  ”   he  looks  over  at  them  from  under  his  glasses,  having  foretold  the  comments  he  would  have  made  before  he  could  make  them.  it  was  eerie.     “  through  here  are  your  rooms.  ”

     “  our  rooms  ?  ”   it’s  elena  who  speaks  first,  but  they  say something  to  the  same  effect   at  the  same  time.   professor  dumbledore  smiles  knowingly,  pushes  the  door  open.   there’s  a  common  sitting  area  with  plush  couches  and  a  coffee  table.  there’s  a  set  of  exploding  snap  cards  on  top,  and  what  looks  like  a  chess  set  underneath.   there  are  two  doors  –  one  in  each  direction.   the  first  thing  damon  notices  is  the  lack  of  doorknobs.   “  they’ll  be  linked  to  your  magical  signatures.  ”   the  headmaster  explains.   “  to  your  wand,  and  only  your  wand.  ”   he  motions  for  elena  to  follow  him  first,  linking  her  magic  before  doing  the  same  with  the  other  for  him.    “  you  two  have  been  chosen  to  be  role-models  for  your  fellow  students.  i  suggest  you  take  some  time  and  reflect  on  that  responsibility  and  what  that  means  for  you.   the  feast  is  at  seven  …  do  try  and  be  on  time.  ”   then,  as  abruptly  as  he’d  collected  them  at  the  carriages,  he’s  gone  again.  it’s  just  them.

        “  you  heard  him.  ”   it’s  elena  that  speaks  up,  her  trunk  following  behind  her  by  magic as  it  walks  itself  into  her  room  and  she sits  on  one  of  the  couches.  “  this  is  serious,  damon.   you  might  not  care  about  anything  but  i  do.  i  won’t  have  you  ruining  this  for  me.  ”    she  pauses,  adds.  “  for  either  of  us.  ”    he  resists  the  urge  to  roll  his  eyes,  says  nothing  as  he  fetches  his  own  things.     

       he  never  plans  on  ruining  things,  that’s  the  problem.  it  simply  happens  anyway. 

* * *

         the  first  few  weeks  actually  go  smoothly.   no  one  ends  up  in  tears,  damon’s  actually  surprisingly  good  at  rounds  even  if  he  does  keep  partnering  up  people  that  hate  each  other  for  his  own  amusement,  and  if  he’d  do  his  paperwork  ?  maybe  elena  would  have  had  no  complaints  about  him.   it’s  with  a  stack  of  paperwork  in  hand  that  she  enters  their  common  room,  voice  yelping  in  surprise  when  not  only  is  he  there  but  he’s  not  alone.   caroline  forbes  springs  away  from  damon  like  she’s  been  burned,  calculating  eyes  narrowed  in  elena’s  direction.   “  seriously  ?  knock  much  ?  ”      she’s  too  stunned  to  even  comment  back,  just  watches  the  slytherin  walk  off.   she’s  friends  with  katherine  for  some  strange  reason  –  elena  thinks  anyone  who  decides  to  be  friends  with  katherine  has  some  serious  judgement  issues –  but  they’ve  never  really  had  much  interaction.   nor  has,  elena  realizes,  she  had  much  with  damon.   this  is  a  new  development.

         “ since  when  are  you  hooking  up  with  caroline  ?  ”    his  response  is  said  casually,  standing  up  and  fastening  his  belt.   his  shirt  is  open,  exposing  his  chest,  and  she  covers  her  face  with  her  hands.  at  some  point  when  she’d  come  in,  the  papers  had  slipped  from  her  hands  and  were  decorating  their  floor.    “  —  since  when  do  you  care ?  ”       she  starts.    “  i  don’t  care.  i  care  that  you’re  —  that  you’re  doing  that  in  our  shared  common  room.   my  friends  sit  on   that  couch.  your  friends  sit  on  that  couch  !  ”    he  smirks.    “  mine  do  a  lot  more  than  sit.  ”      her  nose  wrinkles,  a  pillow  thrown  in  his  direction  as  she  stalks  to  her  room.   “  just  do  your  bloody  paperwork,  salvatore.  it  isn’t  rocket  science.  ”

* * *

       it’s  halloween.   there’s  a  party  in  the  gryffindor  commons,  so  somehow  it’s  fallen  on  elena  and  damon  to  do  rounds  with  their  prefects  out  of  commission.  they  walk  in  relative  silence,  their  route  taking  them  out  by  the  lake.  it’s  a  beautiful  night,  made  only  less  so  by  the  company.   or  it  would  be  maybe,  but  damon  hasn’t  said  a  word  since  they  left  the  castle.  it’s  …  unnerving,  if  she’s  honest.  

      “  you’re  unusually  quiet.  ”   she  stops,  turning  towards  him.  she  thinks  he  looks  pale  in  the  moonlight;   young,  less  like  the  prat  who  is  usually  trying  to  get  under  her  skin.   when  he  doesn’t  reply,  only  cracks  a  half-smile,  she  actually  feels  …  worry.   it’s  new  and  she’s  not  sure  she  likes  it.   “  i’m  serious,  damon.  ”   her  eyes  soften,  a  hand  reaches  for  his  arm.   “  is  something  wrong  ?  ”     she  watches  his  eyes  dart  to  her  arm,  like  maybe he’s  debating  throwing  her  off.   he  doesn’t  though,  simply  sighs.   “  our  mother  loved  halloween.  ”   he  says  instead,  throwing  her  off.   “  stefan  doesn’t  really  remember.  maybe  he  blocked  it  out,  or  maybe  he  doesn’t  want  to  remember  …  but  it  was  her  favorite  holiday.  ”     he  shrugs.   “  she  died  when  i  was  11.   it’s  why  i  started  late.  ”   it’s  never  something  he’s  talked  about  –  that  she  knows  of.   everyone  knew  that  the  salvatores  started  school  together,  were  in  the  same  year  even  though  they  weren’t  twins.    she  hadn’t  known  why  …  not  until  now.    “  i  miss  her  more  on  halloween  than  i  do  on  her  birthday,  or  on  the  anniversary of  her  death.  ”    he  smiles,  she  thinks  he  might  even  have  tears  in  his  eyes.    “  it’s  stupid  …  and  i  don’t  know  why  i’m  saying  any  of  this  to  you.  ”

          she   knows  why   he  is.   she  knows  that  he  knows  that  she  understands  the  feeling.   her  parents  had  died  2  years  earlier;   a  car  crash,  of  all  things.   magic  hadn’t  been  enough  to  save  them  and  she’d  lost  them  both  in  one  fell  swoop.   there’s  a  club  for  dead  parents,  a  feeling  that  you  don’t  understand  until  you  experience  it  for  yourself,  and  her  heart  breaks  for  him  similarly  to  how  it  breaks  for  herself.  it  never  gets  easier.  it’s  a  wound  that  heals  and  reopens  on  a  near  constant   basis.    “  i  won’t  tell  anyone.  ”   she  says  instead.   her  hand  finds  his,  squeezes  once.   “  i  promise.  ”      their  eyes  meet  and  she  feels  …  well,  she  isn’t  sure  what  she  feels,  or  if  she  even  wants  to.   they  continue  their  rounds,  say  goodnight  when  they  get  back  to  their  common  room,  and  she  thinks  about  that  moment  by  the  lake  up  until  the  moment  sleep  finally  claims  her.   

* * *

        they  fall  into  something  unfamiliar.   friendship,  or  something  like  it.   he  brings  her  breakfast,  she  finishes  his  paperwork  without  complaining.  they  become  symbiotic;  the  perfect  team.   she  actually  looks  forward  to  seeing  him  at  the  end  of  the  day,  of  sitting  with  him  by  the  fire  and  comparing  notes  on  their  days.   he  put  the  wrong  ingredient  in  his  potion  and  lost  12  house  points,  while  she  overslept  and  missed  breakfast  only  to  realize  when  she  got  to  her  class  that  she’d  grabbed  the  wrong  books.  they  laugh  until  their  sides  ache,  her  feet  in  his  lap  as  he  massages  them.   she  doesn’t  think  anything  of  it  until  she  meets  bonnie  for  their  study  date,  waves  goodbye  to  damon  as  he  passes  through  their  common  area  to  his  room.   

         when  the  door  clicks  shut,  bonnie  is  spinning  –  a  finger  pointed  straight  at  her.   “  what.  was.  that.  ”   her  best  friend  doesn’t  look  mad,  just  surprised.   “  am  i  losing  it  or  did  i  just  witness  you  and  damon  salvatore  having  a  moment  ?  ”    elena  rolls  her  eyes.   “  no,  no  moment.  geez,  bon.  this  isn’t  one  of  those  trashy  romance  novels  your  mom  reads.  ”   her  teeth  dig  into  her  lower  lip.     for  the  first  time  in  years,  she’s  lying  to  her  best  friend  …  but  he’s  also  lying  to  herself.    she  doesn’t  know  what’s  going  on  between  her  and  damon  but  she  knows  it’s  different.  maybe  he’s  different,  or  maybe  he’s  just  finally  let  her  see  the  good  parts  of  himself  that  he  usually tries  to hide.   “  we’re  friends.  ”          bonnie  isn’t  swayed.   “  friends  don’t  look  at  you  like  they  know  how  you  taste.  you  haven’t  –  ”     she  cuts  her  off.   “  god,  no.   he  used  to   have  a  thing  with  katherine.   we’re  –  it’s  not  like  that.  ”    it’s  not.   is  it?     they  go  back  to  studying  but  bonnie’s  words  haunt  her  well  into  the  night.  

* * *

         it’s  been  going  so  well,  so  it’s  no  surprise  things  take  a  turn  after  christmas  holidays.  damon  comes  back  from  break  and  elena  has  a  boyfriend.   some  guy  named  matt  donovan,  a  muggleborn  hufflepuff   he  thinks.   they  both  stayed  at  the  castle  over  the  break  and  somehow  decided  they  were  perfect  for  each  other.    he  hates  it.   he  especially  hates  seeing  matt  donovan  in  their  shared  common  room,  has  imagined  ripping  him  limb  from  limb  so  many times  he’s  even  checked  his  hands  to  make  sure  he  hasn’t  actually  done  it.   

             thankfully  quidditch  is  a  welcome  distraction,  something  he  throws  himself  into  leading  up  to  the  first  match  of  the  new  year;  slytherin  vs  hufflepuff.    he’s  at  the  top  of  his  game,  in  perfect  sync  with  enzo.   they’ve  always  been  in  tune  with  each  other,  the  best  set  of  beaters  hogwarts  has  seen  in  decades.   with  katherine  as  seeker  and  klaus  as  keeper  and captain  intimidating   everyone  into  submission,  their  team  has  shaped  into  something  even  more  formidable  than  in  year’s  past.   they’re  unstoppable  –  it’s  almost  unfair  to  let  hufflepuff  even  take  the field.    they  lose  280-10  and  that  10  was  a  pity  shot  klaus  ignored  when  cami  o’conner  sent  the  quaffle  hurling  his  way.   suffice  to  say,  damon’s  in  good  spirits  when  his  feet  hit  the  ground.   it  doesn’t  last  long  though  before  matt  donovan  is  on  him,  shoves  him  and  gets  up  in  his  face.  “  you  almost  killed  me,  you  dick.  ”     damon  stares,  has  no  idea  what  he’s  talking  about.   he  likes  to  think  he’d  remember  almost  killing  the  guy.   he  does  hate  him,  after  all.   “  you  look  fine  to  me.  ”   he  replies  instead,  pushing  the  boy  back  when  matt  advances.  it  turns  into  an  all  out  war,  the  teams  squabbling  with  each  other  until  madam  hooch  blows  the  whistle  and  separates  them.  

                                  “  ENOUGH.   DETENTION,  ALL  OF  YOU.  ”

        damon  doesn’t  bother  hitting  the  showers,  instead  going  straight  to  the  head  quarters  with  a  hand  pressed  to  his  jaw.   donovan  managed  to  get  at  least  two  square  punches  in;    one  along  his  jaw,  splitting  his  lip,  and  another  on  his  right  eye.   he’s  not  upset  about  it  though  …  he’s  pretty  sure  he  gave  the  boy  a  matching  set.   he’s  grinning  at  the  thought  as  he  walks  inside,  nearly  smacks  into  elena  on  her  way  out.  unsurprisingly,  she’s  livid.    “  are  you  out  of  your  mind  ?  ”    she’s  shouting,   eyes  wild  as  her  hands  come  up.    “  i  can’t  believe  you  started  a  fight  with  my  boyfriend.   especially  after  what  you  did.  ”       he’s  angry  now,  unable  to  believe  they’re  here  yet  again  with  her  assuming  he’s  done  the  worst  before  he’s  even  done  it.    “  i  didn’t  do  anything  to  matty  blue  eyes.  ”   he  snaps  back.   “  if  i  wanted  to  hurt  him,  he’d  be  in  the  hospital  wing.   bloody  hell,  elena.   what  kind  of  monster  do  you  think  i  am  ?   i  might  not  like  the  guy  but  i  wouldn’t  intentionally  hurt  him.   if  a  bludger  almost  hit  him,   it  was  an  accident.    but  i  can’t  say  i  regret  it  because  he’s  an  idiot.  maybe  getting  hit  in  the  head  will  shake  things  up  in  there  and  he’ll  be  a  smidgen  smarter  than  a  box  of  rocks.  ”    he  knows  he’s  gone  too  far,  sees  the  look  on  her  face  that  hasn’t  been  reserved  for  him  in  awhile.   “  you’re  such  a  dick.  ”   she  says  quietly,   voice  wavering.   “  i  don’t  know  why  i  thought  you  could  change.  ”  

* * *

       they  don’t  talk  for  three  weeks.  when  they  pass  each  other  in  the  halls,  they  pretend  the  other  doesn’t  exist.  if  you  ask  anyone,  it’s  almost  worse  than  the  fighting.  they  only  communicate  via  the  prefects  and  it’s  a  constant  headache.  currently  elena’s  finishing  up  some  paperwork  in  the  library,  avoiding  their  common  area  like  it’s  dragon  pox.   she’s  just  finishing  her  last  stack  when  a  group  of  students  pass  by  her  row,  sit  across  from  the  bookshelf  she’s  tucked  behind.  they  can’t  see  her  but  she  can  hear  them  clear  as  day.  it’s  matt  and  a  couple  of  his  friends  –  trip,  she  thinks,  and  maybe  gabe  ?  she’s  only  met  them  a  handful  of  times.    they’re  talking  about  plans  for  the  summer  —  trips  they  want  to take,  girls  they  want  to  date,  and  while  elena’s  not  trying  to  eavesdrop  she  does  perk  up  when  she  hears  her  name.   “  what  about  gilbert  ?   i  know  you  said  that  was  going  nowhere  with  salvatore  in  the  picture  but  — “     she  hears  matt  shh  him,  his  voice  dropping  into  a  whisper.    she  can’t  hear  what’s  being  said  but  she  has  a  feeling  she  knows.   matt  lied.   the  terrible  things  she  accused  damon  of  doing  –  of  being  –   were  all  a  set-up.     her  stomach  turns,  eyes  welling  up  with  tears.   god,  why  is  she  so  stupid  ?     damon  was  a  bad  guy,   did  bad  things,  but  he’d  been  better  and  she’d  completely  disregarded  that.    she  hadn’t  thought  anything   about  it  because  lately  he’d  been  up  to  his  old tricks:   mouthing  off  in  class,  living  out  of  the  detention  hall,  and  skiving  off  rounds  until  she  was  forced  to  yell  at  him  to  get  him  back  on  track.  she’d  just  assumed  it  was  damon  being  damon.   her  guilt  swallows  her  up  and  she  pales,  gathers  her  books  into  her  arms  and  flees.   

       she  breaks  up  with  matt  the  next  day.   she  doesn’t  tell  him  what  she  overheard,  just  says  that  she  doesn’t  feel  like  she’ll  ever  love  him  and  they  should  end  things  before  it  gets  too  serious.   he  says  he  understands  but  starts  calling  her  the  ice  queen  behind  her  back.   she  thinks  it’s  funny.   she  wishes  she  was  made  of  ice,  unattached  and  unaffected  by  her  surroundings.   she  thinks  it  would  be  easier  than  dealing  with  the  alternatives.   admitting  you’re  wrong  is  hard  …  made  even  harder  when  the  person  you  need  to  apologize  to  is  making  themselves  scarce.  

       it  takes  her  a  week  before  she’s  able  to  track  him  down.   he’s  up  on  the  astronomy  tower,  feet  dangling  over  the  edge  as  he  drinks  from  a  bottle  of  firewhiskey.   she  resists  the  urge  to  yell  at  him,  to  chastise  and  further  isolate  him  from  her.   instead  she  comes  to  stand  behind  him,  takes  the  bottle  and  sips  from  it.  she  coughs  as  it  burns,  her  throat  on  fire  as  she  tries  to  breathe  through  it.  he  seems  surprised  that  she  even  took  a  drink  which  emboldens  her.   he  underestimates  her.    “  i  came  to  apologize.  ”    she  says  it  slowly,  watches  as  he  moves  to  stand.  maybe  he  thinks  it’s  a  fake  out,  that  she’s  about  to  push  him  off  the  tower.  she  has  threatened  as  much  in  the  past.    “  for  what  i  said  before,  about  you  and  matt.  i  know  he  lied.  ”   she  swallows  hard.   “  it  wasn’t  your  fault.  it  was  mine.  ”    his  eyes  search  hers  and  she  can’t  do  it;   she’s  lost  her  nerve,  can’t  tell  him  WHY  matt  felt  the  need  to  lie.    she  can’t  tell  him  that  matt  figured  out  what  she’s  been  hiding  all  this  time,  that  he  knows  even  better  than  she  does  how  she  feels.   she  can’t.   she’s  not  ready.     “  i  just  thought  you  should  know.  ”       he  raises  a  brow,  catches  her  arm  when  she  turns  to  leave.   “  you  said  you  were  coming  to  apologize.  ”   he  reminds  her.    she  nods,  confused.   “  you  never  actually  said  you  were  sorry.  ”   he  points  out.   his  eyes  are  sparkling  and  lips  twitch  up  in  that  trademark  smirk  of  his.      that  damn  smirk.      “  you  know  what  i  meant.  ”   she  replies  with  a  roll  of  her  eyes,  steps  closer  to  him  and  tilts  her  head.   “  i  am  sorry.  ”     there’s  a  moment.   silence  stretches,  her  eyes  meet  his,  and  she  thinks  —  yes,  if  he  kisses  me  …  i’ll   kiss  him  back.     but  he  doesn’t.   he  smiles,  leans  in,   and  presses  a  kiss  against  her  cheek.   it  burns  long  after  he’s  left  the  astronomy  tower  in  his  wake.

* * *

         february  and  march  pass  without  excitement.  things  aren’t  quite  back  to  where  they  once  were,  but  there’s  a  change  between  them  —  an  electricity  that  never  existed  before.  for  damon,  he’s  always  been  cognizant  of  it;   a  pull  he’s  felt  towards  elena,  even  when  he  knew  he  shouldn’t.   but,  he’d  discounted  it  from   the  realm  of  possibility  given  their  histories  —  him,  with  katherine,  and  her  with  stefan.    the  more  time  they  spend  with  each  other,  the  more  they  gravitate  into  each  other’s  orbit,  the  less  problematic  it  seems.   they  fight;   they  squabble,  they  hardly  ever  agree,  and  she’s  constantly  curbing  his  worst  instincts  but  they  compliment  each  other.    he  tests  her,  brings  her  out  of  her  comfort  zone,  and  she  reels  him  back  in  when  he’s  about  to  go  off  the  rails.    they  weirdly  work,  which  is  why  he’s  been  so  hesitant  to  make  a  move.   somewhere  in  the  last  few  months  —  somehow  —   elena  gilbert  has  become  his  best  friend.   maybe  more  than,  if  he’s  being  honest.    but  if  they  cross  that  line,  if  they  try  and  they  fail  ?   all  that  goes  away.    he’s  selfish  in  that  he  needs  her  ...  can’t  decide  if  it’s  worth  the  risk.

               the  choice  is  made  for  him.   they’ve  got  people  over  in  the  common  area;   stefan  and  klaus  are  engaged  in  a  rousing  game  of  exploding  snap,  while  bonnie  alternates  between  making  out  with  enzo  and  braiding  caroline’s  hair.   no  one’s  seen  alaric  for  awhile  now  but  damon’s  pretty  sure  if  they  looked  out  in  the  hallway,  they’d  see  a  pair  of  prefects  wrapped  around  each  other  where  no  one  can  see  ...  unless  of  course  you’re  trying  to  leave.    his  suspicions  are  confirmed  when  he  tries  to  take  a  smoke  break,  rolls  his  eyes  and  returns  to  the  spot  next  to  elena.   she’s  drinking  firewhiskey  straight  from  the  bottle  —  an  improvement  from  that  first  time  where  she’d  nearly  spit  it  back  out.    he  smiles  to  himself,  leans  back  against  the  couch  as  her  head  settles  on  his  shoulder.   it’s  nice.   he  likes  it.    or  rather,  he  likes  her.    he’s  known  it  for  awhile,  but  knowing  and  putting  to  words  are  two  very  different  things.   as  her  hand  rests  on  his  knee,  he  knows  he’s  about  to  do  something  very  stupid.  thankfully  he’s  saved  by  the  returning  alaric,  who  holds  up  a  fresh bottle  of  firewhiskey  and  says  the  words  damon  will  never  forget:    “  who  wants  to  play  truth  or  dare  ?  ”

           nearly  everyone  says  yes,  so  they  all  find  their  way  to  the  floor  and  decide  to  spin  to  see  who  goes  first.  it  lands  on  bonnie  who  picks  truth,  and  they  find  out  that  her  first  crush  was  a  boy  named  kaleb  in  primary   school.   she  spins  and  it  lands  on  stefan,  who  picks  dare  and  is  forced  to  sit  in  klaus’  lap  until  one  of  them  cries  uncle.  given  their  combined  levels  of  stubbornness,  he  assumes  they’re  in  it  for  the  long  haul.   after  stefan,  caroline  is  dared  to  drink  until  she  can’t  anymore,  and  then  jo  confesses  her  secret  crush  on  professor  flitwick.     after  that,  it  finally  lands  on  damon.   he  has  a  choice  to  make,  so  he  makes  the  obvious  one.   “  dare.  ”     he  watches  how  jo’s  eyes  flit  from  alaric,  to  him,  and  then  over  to  elena.   he  knows  almost  instantly  that  this  is  going  to  end  poorly.   that  lines  will  be  crossed  ...  lines  that  can’t  be  uncrossed.    “ i  dare  you  to  kiss  someone  in  this  room.   on  the  lips,  no  cheating.  ”     she’s  given  him  an  out,  an  escape  ...  but  he  knows  he  won’t  take  it.    he  won’t  kiss  jo,  would  rather  swallow  razor blades  than  kiss  caroline  again,   and  bonnie  would  rip  his  lips  off  before  he  got  within  50  ft  of  her.   there’s  always  ric,  or  klaus,  but  neither  of  those  options  seem  appealing.    elena  seems  to  have  realized  it  too,  her  cheeks  turning  a  bright  shade  of  pink  as  she  straightens  up.   “  guys,  ”    she  drags  the  syllables  out.   “  c’mon  ...  how  old  are  we,  12  ?   give  him  another  one.  ”     he  cuts  her  off,  interjecting  with  a  shrug.   cavalier,  or  as  cavalier  as  he  can  be  when  his  heart  is  thudding  in  his  chest.   “  it’s  fine.  it’s  just  a  kiss,  right  ?  ”    elena  meets  his  gaze,  nods  her  head.  “ yeah.  ”   she  agrees.   “  just  a  kiss.  ”

         the  room  quiets  as  he  shifts,  brings  a  hand  up  to  curve  around  the  back  of  her  neck.   he  feels  his  cheeks  flushing  as  he  leans  in,  presses  his  lips  against  hers.   he  intends  for  it  to  be  soft;    slow,  even,  testing  the  waters,  but  what  he  plans  and  what  happens  are  two  very  different  things.   their  lips  touch  and  her  hand  comes  up  to  press  against  his  chest,  goosebumps  prickling  his  arms  as  he  shivers.   the  kiss  deepens  and  someone  shifts  closer  until  suddenly  she’s  half  in  his  lap,  a  leg  strewn  over  his  own  in  a  bid  to  get  closer.   he  thinks  he  hears  someone  whistling  but  it’s  impossible  to  think  of  anything  beyond  how  amazing  it  feels  to  kiss  her   ...  to  be  kissed  by  her.     when  they  pull  away,  neither  one  of  them  says  anything.   they  exchange  stolen  glances  out  of  the  corner  of  their  eyes,  don’t  talk  about  what  happened  even  after  all  of  their  friends  have  left.   it  should  be  weird  but  somehow  they  just  ...  fall  into  place.   he  carries  her  books  to  class,  she  snuggles  up  with  him  after  class  on  the  couch  and  falls  asleep  in  his  lap.     one  day  he  kisses  her  in  the  hallway  and  the  whole  school  collectively  loses  it.    they  go  from  friends,  to  lovers,  to  everything  in  the  span  of  a  few  weeks  without  missing  a  beat.   it  works  —  it  fits.

           on  the  last  day  of  school,  on  the  platform  where  they  first  met,  it’s  only  natural  that  damon  asks  her  to  spend  the  summer  with  him.   she  accepts  and  the  summer  bleeds  into  the  year,  and  then  another,  and  then  before  you  know  it  they’re  married  and  taking  their  kids  to  kings  cross  station  for  their  first  year  at  hogwarts.   

       the  years  pass  quickly  and  without  warning  but  through  it  all  ?    they  face  it  together  ...  as  a  team.     

             perhaps  albus  dumbledore  had  known  what  he  was  doing  all  along.

[marvelousbirthdays]

Happy Birthday, sincenothinglasts

July 10-Daisy/Loki, something with hurt/comfort, lots of feels, and a happy ending maybe with (nonsexual) “I just want to be close to someone for a little bit. Is that okay?” or “Please stay. I’d like some company.”, please! And if you could insert a little bit of jealousy somewhere, it would be perfect, for @sincenothinglasts

Written by @ladywinterlight

Note: I have seen Avengers: Endgame and there are minor spoilers. I hope that’s cool with everyone.

This is loosely based on the alternate timeline where Loki escaped with the Tesseract. Pre-series AoS, though who knows what would’ve happened with AoS in that timeline. Happy birthday!

Loki didn’t know why she fascinated him so.

He’d caught glimpses of her, in the chaos of the attack on New York City. She should’ve been just another mortal, so very beneath him. And yet.

The Tesseract gave him the ability to skip about the cosmos at will, sometimes at random, even to places his magic couldn’t readily take him. And somehow he continually found himself back on Midgard, just slightly out of phase with the rest of her reality.

Watching. Listening.

At first, he thought perhaps it was some lingering effect of the control stone in the scepter he’d carried while doing Thanos’ bidding. Some unknown way the magic had affected his mind. But as the effects faded, his fascination with her remained steady.

She had so much potential, something he sensed just under the surface. She also carried so much pain, though it never showed when she interacted with others. Even if most of her ‘interaction’ was through the computers she had set up in her tiny mobile living space.

A ‘van’ she’d called it, once or twice, in his hearing.

Even cloaked, he didn’t dare linger around her constantly. But he kept coming back, for some unknown reason.

~~~~~

Skye knew she was being watched.

She had no idea who it might be, or why they’d be stalking her in particular; she’d never been truly caught hacking, Stark and his AIs aside, not even electronically. Other than Miles, who just wanted back into her pants, and Matt, who she’d mostly distanced herself from to avoid hurting his career as a lawyer with her less-than-legal activities, Skye didn’t really have any friends.

But she had somehow acquired a part-time, invisible watcher.

Maybe it was some kind of alien, watching her to learn more about human behavior. The idea made her scoff at herself, but after the Chitauri invasion… it wasn’t entirely unbelievable, either.

Though why they’d have chosen her was less understandable. She wasn’t anything special.

When the feeling of being watched hadn’t dissipated by dinnertime, she assembled her usual - canned tuna fish sandwiches - and set the plastic plate down between herself and the ‘empty’ space in her van.

“Whomever you are, you must be hungry,” she said aloud, as her eyes skittered around the space. “You could stay. I’d like some company.”

Loki was taken aback. He’d never been noticed before, no matter whom he’d silently spied upon. But… this was Midgard, and he would hardly expect to be welcome if he showed himself. But then the second comment registered. He hesitated, uncertain. Of course, he could always use the Tesseract or his own magic to take him away if she reacted poorly to his presence.

Perhaps it was worth the risk.

Skye’s breath caught sharply when the air shimmered for a moment, revealing the previously hidden figure. He looked ridiculously imposing in his black and green armor, despite being tucked casually into a corner of her van.

Her eyes traced their way up his face until their gazes met, and she fought back the urge to recoil.

Loki. She recognized him from televised clips of the incident in Germany and the battle in New York.

And yet, he hadn’t attacked her in any of his prior visits. She’d had the sensation of being watched on and off for a few months, and she was still fine.

So she ventured a small smile. “Nice to meet you, I think? I’m Skye. But you probably knew that.”

After watching her, Loki knew she had a tendency to talk when nervous. She tended to brazen her way out of awkward situations, but he had also seen her out-think potential trouble. So he simply responded with a smile of his own. “I did, but it is nice to make your acquaintance properly.”

She studied him for a long, quiet moment. Then she nudged the plate closer to him. “I’d imagine tuna is beneath the palette of the would-be king of the world, but it’s food. I don’t mind sharing.”

“I would not be so rude as to refuse such a generous offer,” he replied, lightly mocking but in a friendly way. Much to his own surprise. “Though I daresay it’s beneath such a clever individual as yourself as well.”

Rolling her eyes at his teasing, Skye just shrugged. “Cleverness doesn’t come with a paycheck, and cheap food is still enough to get by on.”

Loki reached for a sandwich and tried a bite as she watched. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant, but certainly nothing like he was accustomed to. “Thank you for sharing,” he said lowly; even if it wasn’t much, it had been a long time since someone had offered to share with him from what little they had. He watched as she picked up another sandwich and started to eat.

“You’re welcome. It’s only polite, you know?”

He gave a little shrug. “Some on your world would say I have already proven I do not deserve courtesy.”

His comment made Skye chuckle and she shook her head. “Many would say I don’t deserve courtesy, either. I’m just a poor orphan, living in my van.”

The sheer lack of judgment in her tone or in her expression as their eyes met again made Loki’s heart skip a beat. No one, other than Frigga, had ever made him want to be completely honest with them. And yet, Skye did. “Then we have something in common.”

Skye watched quietly as the mask Loki wore, carefully guarding his thoughts and feelings, cracked a bit. She caught sight of the deeply held pain in his eyes, if only briefly. It made him seem more human. “Well, I’m guessing you don’t live in a van, so…”

“Twas not long ago that I learned the truth, that the parents I thought I had are not truly mine,” Loki finished for her, his tone more subdued than she’d ever expected from him.

She frowned, tilting her head inquisitively. “You’re adopted? That’s not so bad.”

Loki blinked at her. “They lied to me. My whole life, they lied. They let me believe they were my parents, when in truth I was the monster they sheltered in order to prevent another war.”

“Were they cruel to you?” she asked bluntly. “Did they beat you, starve you, or lock you in a closet when you cried?” Visibly startled, Loki shook his head. “Did they raise you, love you, to the best of their ability?” This time he nodded. Skye shrugged and went back to her sandwich. “Then they’re your parents. Blood doesn’t make family. God knows, there are a few families I always wished would’ve adopted me.”

“But I am a monster, the enemy they all speak of with such disdain,” Loki protested.

“I don’t understand,” Skye admitted readily. “But if you want to talk about it, I’ll listen.”

Carefully placing his half-eaten sandwich back on the plate, Loki ran his hands through his hair in agitation. “I don’t think you can understand,” he began, but paused when she scoffed.

“So explain. If you can explain why it’s such a big deal, I should be able to get it,” she pointed out.

So he told her. Described the long wars between Asgard and Jotunheim, the longstanding hatred between the races. Growing up with a hereditary enemy, one his so-called brother had sworn to eradicate when they were still children. And then the shock of encountering them in battle for himself, reacting differently on a physical and magical level than he’d expected. Forcing the truth from Odin’s lips, and his growing self-hatred… never worse than when Odin rejected him and his attempt to destroy the monsters.

As if that would destroy the monster in himself as well.

They’d long since finished eating by the time the story was done. Somewhere along the line they’d moved; Skye half reclined on a pile of pillows and Loki found himself leaning into her embrace, her arms wrapped around him comfortingly.

“I get it,” she offered quietly when the silence drew out between them. “I was always classed as a troublemaker, too. I only ever wanted a place to belong, and to keep the kids younger than me safe from the bad families. I mean, no one was at war or anything. But some people here foster kids just because the government pays them for it. Some don’t care about the kids, or even really want them. The good families… the ones who made you feel safe, the ones you thought you could maybe stay with… they were a lot fewer and further between. So… I understand. I know the feeling of wanting to belong so badly, and reacting badly when you find out that you never can.” Skye sighed. “Your parents love you, though; I hope you can see that. And maybe, someday, you can make things right with them. On both sides, yours and theirs. I kinda envy that, you know? They’re still around, so you still have a chance to fix those relationships.”

“How are you so wise for one so young?” Loki asked rhetorically. He felt strangely light, unburdened. And with a bit of hope, for the first time in Norns knew how long.

“Kids in the system don’t get to be kids for long,” Skye answered anyway. “I may not be a thousand years old, but I’ve seen more than my share of crap.”

“I would like to show you some of the beauty in the galaxy, if you’d let me,” Loki offered. “There’s a great deal of it out there.”

“Perhaps,” she conceded, her tone noncommittal. She doubted he actually meant it, but it was a nice thought. “But I think you probably ought to go see your family first.” She was interrupted by a yawn.

“I should let you sleep,” Loki began, gathering himself for a dismissal.

“You could stay,” she offered again. It was probably not the brightest idea she’d ever had, and yet somehow the risk seemed worth it when his demeanor brightened. “Not a lot of space, but you can share.”

“I can… enlarge the space, if you’d like?” he suggested tentatively. “With magic.”

“Oh, I’d love to see that,” Skye responded immediately. Loki didn’t need to do anything as trite as wave a wand or cast a complicated spell. Instead, she watched a look of concentration cross his face and then the space in her van just sort of seemed to… bend. Suddenly there were several feet between the futon where they rested and the walls of the van, and her computers were further down the length of the space as well. A flick of his fingers caused her pillows to suddenly multiply and the futon expanded until there was more than enough room for two.

“That’s awesome. I wish I could do that every night,” Skye enthused.

“I… I don’t know if Midgardians have magical aptitude. If you do… then perhaps you could learn,” Loki answered with a faint smirk. “I am pleased you like it.” It had been a long time since his ability to magically adapt his surroundings for comfort had been appreciated, and he’d forgotten how good it felt to provide for another.

“I do,” she affirmed. Then she waved her hand toward the magically created pillows. “Make yourself comfortable.” She shifted her own pillows and blankets around until she was comfortable. When she settled, she was a little surprised to see Loki lie down right beside her, despite ample space.

“I just want to be close to someone for a little while,” Loki explained. “Is... that okay?”

Skye smiled and shifted closer. He wrapped an arm around her and she pillowed her head on his shoulder. “It’s okay with me. Good night, Loki.”

“Good night, Skye.”

It had been years since either of them slept so peacefully and so well. But that night, they did.

[aaronobrian]

Re-thinking Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Last night my kids and I sat down to watch the Last Jedi. After a little squabbling on what movie to watch we decided on The Last Jedi. This would be the fourth time I have watched this movie. I wasn’t really excited about seeing it again, only as a way for us all to relax for the evening. I was never that impressed with story of the Last Jedi, especially some of the story arcs. I have not changed my mind on all of these issues. You can read them here. But there are a few on this last viewing that has changed.

1.) Put a shirt on Kylo... The connection between Rey and Kylo Ren. I first read their interactions through time and space as the doing of Snoke and the movie playing up a odd romantic relationship between them. But it occurred to me that Rey and Kylo are opposites. They are like the Chinese philosophy of Yin and Yang.  Yin and Yang is defined as “concept of dualism, describing how seemingly opposite or contrary forces may actually be complementary, interconnected,  and interdependent in the natural world, and how they may give rise to each other as they interrelate to one another.” If you remember the symbol of Yin and Yang, it looks like a black and white fishes with a white eye in the black fish and a black eye in the white fish. This helps these dueling characters to understand each other. With that explained, I see Kylo Ren and Rey as the same concept. Kylo Ren is evil, committed himself to the dark side. Yet, there is a light side within him. He can’t bring himself to kill his mother Leia. He has an odd affection towards Rey (later asking Rey to join him). Kylo is Ben Solo the offspring of the best of the last generation. All the cunning of Han Solo and the Skywalker blood line with the power of the Force. Where Rey is the exact opposite, she comes from nothing and has nothing. Her parents were nobodies, no noble lineage, that abandoned her. She led a hard life growing up as savager of junk with no guidance, no love, no direction given to her, unlike Ben Solo. Yet Rey is kind and caring and is drawn to the light side of the Force. But her “black dot/eye” is her grit that was deeply learned from her hard life. And there is the aspect of her answering the call of the Dark Side. She went into the Dark Side cave and found nothing but herself. And if the Force is an active player in the Star Wars story, then for every rise in the Dark side that has to be an equal rise in the Light side like Snoke had said. The raw power on Kylo is then met with the pure power from Rey. (Which leads me to believe that Rey and Kylo might be brother and sister. Or maybe Rey is cloned from other Jedis? I could be wrong, but it is a pet theory.)  

2.) Luke Skywalker (or the heartbreak of every Gen Xer) We have seen this before.  Obi Wan Kenobi living far away on Tatooine watching over Luke. The same as Yoda hidden away on Dagobah. Both not rebuilding the Jedi Order or fighting against the Empire. When we see Luke he has closed himself off from the Force. He is unwilling to train Rey or join Leia and the Resistance against the First Order. This is a BIG disappointment in Luke for many who grew up as our hero. A hero that saved his father, even after Vader killed his teacher, killed his Aunt & Uncle (by proxy), maimed him, and turned him over to the Emperor. Luke did not give up. He was always optimistic no matter how grim the situation was. When Rey finds him on his lonely island, he has lost all of that aspect of his character.  This is what is unbelievable to those of us that grew up with this character. This was maybe the hardest pill to swallow in TLJ.  Luke has a new philosophy about the Force, it is not “ours to control”. There is a bit of truth to that in life as well as the Force. You can’t control people or every event in your life. Some things you have to “let go” and let them work themselves out. That things resolve themselves for the better and hope that Martin Luther King, Jr. was correct when saying “The arc of history is long, but it bends toward justice.” Luke saw the raw power and darkness in Ben Solo and it scared him. And which ever iteration of how Luke and Ben clashed in his bedroom you believe in, this event shook Luke to his core. Like Obi Wan thought that he could instruct Anakin just as well as Yoda and he was wrong. Luke failed Ben as a teacher. Ben had too much of the Dark Side and Luke could not change him like he could with his father. All of this is made Luke into a hermit. And if Luke was an ordinary guy, then we could all say, hey man you tried your best.” But this is Star Wars! Luke is a hero! Heroes don’t give up! Right? But wait… Is Luke right? This battle of the Light and Dark Side has gone on for thousands of years. Jedi and Sith battling for dominance for thousands of generations. Luke looks at that long “arc of history” and thinks this isn’t working. The Jedi Order was too rigid. There has to be another way, a better way. But how can that happen when the Sith don’t care but to gather all the power. Like a seesaw the Force becomes unbalanced if only the biggest kid sits on the one side. There is three or four options … 1) Keep things the same. The Light and Dark battle it out forever. (As we have see for the last 8 movies.) 2) Let one side become so powerful that there is a schism and the powers re-balance themselves 3) Let one side become so powerful that there is a mutation and different type of Force is invented. 4.) Let the Force alone and maybe the Force will be distributed equally throughout the galaxy. Either way, the Dark Side will prevail for a period. And like the Manhattan Project, or the Race for Artificial Intelligence is might be better for us never to touch these civilization ending technologies. But it would be far worse if the Soviets or China won these races. So we press on because the outcome could become too unthinkable. And so is the same as in Star Wars. I don’t have an answer to all this. But I agree that Luke has a point here and it is worth considering.  Which leads me to my next thought… 3.) “Let the past die.” Okay - I still have issues with Rey’s control over the Force with little training. It doesn’t make a lot of sense. But maybe Rey is like a virtuoso genius? We have all seen a child 4 years old playing piano. So MAYBE it is possible. With that said, the whole point of TLJ is to subvert the old order. Luke wants to end the Jedi Order. Rey has no Master. Kylo kills Snoke and asks Rey to join him. And on the surface many of us think, “no this is not Star Wars.” But with more movies coming down the pipeline the formula needs to change or it will become repetitive.  And if Luke was right, this Jedi/Sith battle is not working and it never will resolve itself. Let’s find another solution. Maybe it is time for a new path. And maybe TLJ is the first step on this road.

4.) Kylo Ren’s Fear Lastly, I have reconsidered Kylo Ren. As I recall I called Kylo’s character “a whiny bitch”. But the last scene, showing Luke staring down at Ben Solo and ignites his lightsaber Ben has a look of pure fear in his eyes. I have seen that look in my children eyes and even my dog’s eyes. I realized that like Anakin, Ben’s seduction to the Dark Side is through fear. And instead of helping Ben through his fear it is ignored by Luke. Thus Ben Solo turns to the Dark Side by unfortunately Ben is trying to be someone else -- Darth Vader. We see Kylo is trying to be Vader in the last 2 movies. But like anyone trying to be someone else it can never be achieved. You have to find yourself and follow your only path. This time I pity Kylo. A boy that never felt safe and was never guided out of his fear. Trying to be someone else for everyone else. It is a pathetic existence. He sees Rey naturally being herself and succeeding. Rey is living a fulfillment of her own unique life. As Nietzsche said "a wheel rolling out of its own center."  What is unknown is the fulfillment of our own unique lives, the likes of which has never existed in this universe. And you are the only one who can do it.  Rey is doing this. Kylo is maybe discovering that he can’t succeed from the past. He kills Snoke and unshackles himself. Maybe this is his first act of courage.

In closing, this movie might have a deeper meaning behind it. But it killed a lot of sacrificial lambs to get there and thus upsetting the old order. I am the “old order”. I was there in the theater in 1977 as a 3 year old. I saw Luke as quintessential hero. The battle of the Light and Dark Side as a forever war. But if Star War is to continue forward something has to change. I still stand by many of my original statements of this movie. It does suffer from some bad story arcs that go nowhere. But there is more happening in TLJ then what I originally understood.

[fatedroses]

Faustus’ Story

Alright, because @lunarpaps asked for me to go into more detail behind the changes I’ve made for this characters story.

I’m going to make one, albeit long, post going through the timeline and actually have this written out for anyone curious on this characters story and how at least for my canon he fits into the world as a whole.

Alright, starting off are the major changes I’ve made in terms of the story I’ve already written and posted on here, or may have referenced. I may end up linking on an oc page or something similar to this post, and after I get this posted I will most likely end up drawing snippets of the events, cause this also inspired me to do so anyways.

Changes, and anything that I forgot will be added in a reblog later on:

With Liam returning for this version, Hugrim, and most of the decisions involving him, is going to be with and between him and Sarath. This is better just because him and Sarath have better chemistry with each other, and I’ll eventually get around to their stories after I get them more solidified. I’ll admit that writing the initial relationship between him and Faustus just didn’t seem to flow the way I wanted it to, and that I’m more satisfied with this direction, and it lets all of them get a happier ending.

Faustus is more of an emissary and ally to the Vanguards rather than an outright leader, I want his position as a Greyguard to be more relevant to his character and therefore Felicity is going to take his older role in the council of the Vanguards, a better fit considering her role in the Kirin Tor and her relationship with Praeragos. I guess Faustus technically takes the role as one of the adventurers due to his interactions with Genn and his tasks often delivering messages and running errands, but whatever.

Because Faustus would in turn be spending more time both between Darnassus and Stormwind, and later Kul Tiras, when he isn’t on any assignments because of his position, I plan on him having more interactions and development with Anduin, Mathias, Varian, etc. I’ve been able to affirm to myself that it’s alright writing dynamics between these characters, cause I’m a dweeb and steered away from that for whatever reason. 

In turn I get to explore his reaction and interactions to the events that happened, both that he was and wasn’t there for. For example him traveling to Northrend with Felicity and a few others to learn of what happened as a person alongside his team, from a bystander’s point of view in his off time with the Vanguards. To then participating in the search for Anduin during MoP, as an active member of the alliance and as someone who would’ve went searching for the missing prince regardless of his allegiances or not. By originally putting him in a situation where he had to be in a consistently neutral environment it made him going out into these new situations difficult to write for, as it made trying to get the information for these places hard to actually write in a way that made sense.

Now seen with the “Dynamic Duo” piece that was posted before this post, Faustus’ affinity for magic and the situation with being a spellblade/mage-rogue combo is going to be something that took effect far earlier in his story. With him and his brother, and in turn his mother and his father respectively, the boys took after their parents, with Faustus showing traits of magical prowess while Pheles showed traits of druidic prowess at an early age. After the fire Faustus then later gets training on magic from Felicity, her parents, and Ashton, and he specializes in Ashton’s practice of magic which is close ranged, portals, and enchantment. However in most cases he’s on active duty he tends to focus on using it for teleportation and avoiding the long ass boat rides when he has the ability and energy to. Speaking of Pheles, I’m leaning towards making the two twins, just because the year difference really doesn’t make too much of an impact and this fits a bit better.

Krennan takes Faustus in as an adopted son rather than having him just kinda stick around the castle like it was previous planned/implied. It gives me an excuse to give Krennan more attention due to the fact I was already interested in the character beforehand. It also gives Faustus the opportunity to build his relationships with the royals and Felicity more organically than it was before.

The story behind Faustus losing his arm has been tweaked, but that’ll be explained more in depth during the story section of this post. I also plan on redrawing the pieces that went with it as well. Hex is still the main antagonist of that arc, and it’s still a decisive sacrifice Faustus makes, it’s just the events beforehand and afterwards are a bit different.

————

For the sake of having this all in one place, I’m also going to have the entire story written out. When I tagged this as a long post, I meant it. I might tweak a few things in the future, but this is what is what I’m running with for the time being. This also includes the story of his parents due to their relevance in setting up the events that happen later on.

Story:

Parents and Childhood (Ages 0-10):

Born to Ilaise and Cedius Erthwal, Faustus and Pheles’ life started out rather average, and they were planned to be raised in Gilneas. Ilaise, born and raised in Gilneas herself met her husband Cedius during a trip to Boralus. The druid was taking his monthly trip to the market for supplies to aid in his research over the cycle of regrowth and decay, driven by his fascination with the Cenarion druid circles spurred on by an encounter with Sarath as well as other traveling druids. Ilaise herself was working alongside Ashton Wythers, another mage of the Kirin Tor, in finding the limits of their magical ability, and was known in her own town of Emberstone as a rather renowned hunter that earned her a friendship with Mia before the would be queen was courted by and got married with Genn. In learning of each other’s studies they hit it off, eventually leading to Ilaise offering to bring Cedius to Gilneas, which he heartily agrees, wanting to get away from Drustvar due to some history, and family, the druid wanted to get away from. 

However Cedius, in his move across the seas, was still going to need a decent size of land to continue his studies. Thanks to Mia granting them a closer audience with both Genn and his father, they were granted a section of land, a farm estate that was to be built by the two north of the city, given their own resources of the forest and whatever land they needed, so long as any food and lumber grown was produced in benefit to Gilneas and her people. Cedius took this offer gladly, as the efforts of mass regrowth of crops and ensuring that it didn’t negatively impact the areas surrounding it was a part of his research. Genn, in his curiosity in seeing that if this plan would work, brought him to investigate it frequently, eventually leading to his cordial friendship with Cedius.

As the years went on in this arrangement, in both his relationship with Ilaise and the regrowth project on the farmland, went well. Him and Ilaise got married after Ilaise returned from aiding the other human settlements against the first horde, lending her duties over to her colleague Ashton who took her place fighting so that she could settle down and eventually have Faustus and Pheles with Cedius, an act she was greatly thankful for. Genn and Mia, busy with raising their own children, and with the situation regarding the surrounding kingdoms, found themselves being able to visit their friends less and less, though they were able to visit each other during the birthdays of their children.

The brothers themselves found friendship in each other and the other children of Emberstone, which was nearby. They had met the Greymane siblings beforehand, but due to the distance and the ever nearing conflicts they didn’t really have the opportunity to get to know each other well. Faustus found at a young age that he had an affinity for the arcane trying to save a vase that tipped off the table. This was much to his father’s amusement having to leap after his son and the vase to actually save the situation, only for Ilaise to run in with a very confused dirt covered Pheles from their trip to their own private garden, discovering that the boys had the affinity of the opposite “preferred parent”, a joke among the two. This led to the boys getting some rather rudimentary training alongside their education, turning the rather mischievous pair even worse in their tricks as it helped Faustus honed his ability to blink short distances, which made him almost impossible to catch, and Pheles had a rather special focus on growing roots that often led to Cedius tripping and landing face first in the dirt, as well as jumpscaring both parents as he found his natural talent in the bear druid form.

Unfortunately Cedius’s history ended up catching up to him as his brother, known only to others as Hex, had hunted him down to Gilneas alongside several members of the cult. With Hex’s intention to either force his brother to use his druidic prowess in strengthening the reach of the blighted lands back in Drustvar and bringing about the return of Gorak Tul, or die. He started a fire at the base of the house, which was first discovered by Pheles, who ran to get his father to alert him about it. With the aid of his accomplices the fire spread quicker than usual, making it difficult for Ilaise to try and put it out as everything she tried to do only seemed to come back tenfold. This only got worse as the roof started to collapse, which ended pinning Faustus under a beam. Cedius had went off to try and find the source up until he encountered his brother, refusing his offer almost immediately and trying to call upon some wicker constructs to defend himself, and while Ilaise had managed to keep the fire from burning Faustus, he was too panicked in his young age to try and blink out from the debris until Ilaise was able to lift the beam a bit and Pheles pulled him out. As they tried to escape the house Ilaise pushed the boys away from more falling debris, sacrificing herself and getting herself pinned so that the two could escape by Faustus blinking both of them away, and they started to run to get help. Hex elected to leave his weakened brother to his colleagues to chase after the boys, believing that if they were in immediate danger Cedius would agree. Instead Cedius watched on as Pheles tripped Hex with roots along the dirt path, knocking his mask off so that they could both run away and so that Faustus could nail Hex in the nose with a rock, catching him off guard so that Pheles could attempt to carry his brother off on his back. One important piece that both Ilaise and Hex didn’t realize was that Pheles had taken his father’s very important research journal with him as well.

This only enraged Hex more, knowing that even if his colleagues succeeded in their attempt to now assassinate Ilaise and Cedius that the brothers would become issues later on. So he gave chase. Pheles found that drawing the pyromancer into the city was a bad idea, and threw Faustus off his back, electing to attempt to maul Hex’s legs before running off in another direction, while Faustus ran off in another direction. Hex went after Faustus however, as he was still injured by getting pinned. Pheles ran off towards the harbor, catching the attention of one of the Kul Tiran vessels that had their own druid working up in the crows nest. The crew took Pheles in, and sent their druid to go help his brother. This druid, Silvio, managed to catch up to Hex, clawing at his face in his bird form and giving Faustus enough time to run into the city of Gilneas and hide before Silvio himself flew off, leaving Hex to deal with his wounds and return to the burning home before he could manage to get caught by any city guards sent his way.

Hex and his colleagues made sure that Ilaise and Cedius were dead before returning to Drustvar, not knowing however that before their deaths they had bound themselves to the hearth, making their spirits remain on Azeroth and defeating their purpose of making them useless in death. Pheles joined the crew on their voyage back to Kul Tiras, much to the captain’s chargin but that aside he would eventually be taken to Ulfar by Silvio to learn the ways of the Thornspeaker, and gave Pheles an opportunity to learn more about his father from his old teacher before eventually returning to that vessel to join the captain in learning to become one. Finally Faustus went into hiding, becoming paranoid that Hex would be able to find him again, or that those around him could give him up to him, and isolated himself, finding his life as stealing food from stalls and blinking away before anyone noticed and hiding away in the empty unused water pipes that surrounded the city. Genn was alerted to the fire by his guard, leaving Liam and Tess in the care of Krennan before they went to investigate, only to find the home and farmland in ash, all of Cedius work was gone, and the now-king himself found Ilaise and Cedius inside the home, hand in hand with each other, and realized as because he couldn’t find the boys that they were still out there somewhere.

Adolescence and the Greyguard (Ages 10-25):

Faustus spent a couple months in hiding, avoiding anyone he deemed as untrustworthy, which due to his paranoia from the entire situation beforehand and being separated from his parents and brother, was just about everyone. Genn, Mia, Krennan, and Krennan’s charge and family friend Felicity would try to go looking for him after getting a letter from Kul Tiras stating that Pheles was found and safe. Felicity herself found that she could get glimpses of Faustus and the directions he went off to, but due to him using his arcane abilities to get away, and for him himself discovering he could hide himself using magic, making him difficult to hunt down.

After awhile, as Genn, Mia, Tess, and Liam were taking a trip through the city, Liam finds that the bracelet given by his mother was gone from his wrist. Knowing that it hadn’t had fallen he looked around, spotting Faustus backing up and running away from the group. Offended at the theft of his heirloom, Liam went after him, Tess immediately following her brother and making Genn and Mia panic for a moment before running after them. The siblings managed to chase him into an alleyway, and nearly succeeded in cornering him had he not tried to blink away. He was quickly caught by Genn when he and Mia caught up, and with Mia’s help they managed to calm him down enough to be able to bring him to Krennan. There the siblings and Felicity stayed with Faustus as the adults talked, and for the first time in a while, thanks to three cracking small jokes trying to get Faustus to at least laugh, they actually succeeded, and while they couldn’t get him to talk he at least accepted staying close to them. Faustus gave Liam his bracelet back as a silent apology, and after a bit of discussion Krennan came to him offering to take him in and adopt him. Faustus gave it some thought, grabbed Felicity’s arm and nodding with a quiet yes.

Faustus had a relatively normal rest of his childhood, though he continued to have paranoia and nightmares about Hex. This also started his and Felicity’s close friendship after they started living in the same house, Felicity thought that she was basically chosen after Faustus agreed to stay, and they bonded over their studies in magic, which Felicity was able to share her resources about it with him. They both also bonded with Krennan, often helping him around with his alchemy by going to the market to get herbs and having him teach them both their general education and alchemy. These two also spent time with the royal siblings thanks to Krennan often visiting Genn for both personal and professional reasons, Tess herself found it fascinating that Faustus was able to pickpocket Liam without anyone noticing, and Liam himself wanted to learn about Faustus more, as he often remembered seeing Cedius come to the manor once in a while but never really got the chance to talk. Felicity herself already knew the siblings well due to the amount of time she had already spent with Krennan beforehand.

As time went on, with Faustus reaching his teens, the four became a very tight knit group. Liam trained under his mother in becoming a hunter, finding after a good amount of training that he was quite a remarkable marksmen. Felicity decided not to focus her studies towards the offensive uses of magic, and instead aimed to one day improve the kingdom itself through her own inventions and such. Faustus found that he had a mark for design and engineering, often helping Felicity with her plans, but he also aimed to become a Greyguard after having an opportunity to watch them train, as well as him watching Genn and Darius train with each other several times before. Genn agreed to help Faustus train, as well as introduce him to some of his spymasters so that he could learn the ways of a rogue, considering how he was built he was suited for it. This also led to Faustus passing off the knowledge he had to the younger Tess, helping her start down her path of roguishness without, for the most part, Genn knowing, until she started training down that path as she got older.

Faust devoted himself to earning his place among the Greyguard, as with the more time he spent with them he found his own purpose with them. As the Greymanes had given him their time and effort to look for and out for him, he found that the only way to repay that in a way he would be satisfied with was to devote his life to giving them the protection that he was never able to give his parents and brother because of his inexperience and young age, In that way he could set aside the feelings and failures he felt as a child and instead had the opportunity to spend time with those he really cares about and be at peace with himself. His devotion eventually earned him the position of being Liam and Tess’s retainer, passed off by his main mentor Sibran, and it gave him the ability to just hang out with them while helping his superiors out on their duties when he could as a decision made by Genn so that the boy could still have a generally normal youth without having to worry about issues that brought him into constant danger or away from those close to him. Liam and Faustus also started getting even closer around this time, often found training with each other, working together to create new weapons and rifles, or were out hunting and patrolling around Gilneas.

There were issues however, as after Genn made the decision to secede from the Alliance and wall off Gilneas from the rest of the other kingdoms issues began to arise that actually called Faustus’ attention, starting with an event that happened not long after the construction of the wall started and in an attempt to get everyone's mind off of it they held a winter banquet, where an angered objector tried to get retribution for losing his land to being on the other side of the wall by attacking Liam, as he was the first Greymane he saw. Faustus managed to take the hit instead, earning him the scar across his eye and a scar on his left shoulder. This started the trend of Faustus having to watch around him more often than before, especially after the rebellion started taking more of a hold and the scourge started attacking the finished north gate wall. In addition due to his talents Faustus was also tasked with trying to root out the rebellion members and finding out who was leading them, in which his attempts tended to get him in a lot of trouble when he got too close.

Though despite all the struggles that came with this era Faustus and Liam found solace in each other, a couple close calls including the attack on at the banquet pushed Liam to actually admit his feelings to Faustus, feelings Faustus shared and that they had both developed from the time they had spent at each other’s side. At first they kept it hidden, in one part knowing that if any of the opposition knew it would be easy for them to use Faustus against Liam, and by extension the other Greyguard and Genn, in another part due to general royal upbringing Liam wasn’t entirely sure how his parents would really feel about the relationship due to the standard of marrying for political benefit and the state of Gilneas’ political climate was difficult to read at the time. However, Genn and Mia are neither foolish or oblivious, and were quick to understand their situation, leading to Genn having to pull Liam aside and quell his worries that he had married Mia out of love, not out gain or political pressure, and that if he truly found that he loved Faustus that he should go with it, especially since with Gilneas isolated there wasn't really much to get political gain for. Even if their relationship didn’t become public, some still found the pair as quite an intimidating duo, as Liam was a natural born leader and a major inspiration to those who came in contact with them, and Faustus became known as a creative inventor with a knack for detective work, who got the title of being an anti-assassin.

The scourge continued to become more and more of a problem, more so than the rooted rebellion as attacks would get collectively worse, leading Genn to call in Arugal for a solution, which came to be reawakening the worgen. Faustus, Sibran, and the other greyguard found themselves as the last line of military defense against the undead. An experience Faustus almost immediately regretted when he first came in contact with an abomination, but when the worgen came to aid them, and ended up turning against the front line, Faustus ended up getting bitten in the process. Not knowing that the curse was spread by the bite, he was cleared by Sibran to return back into the city, only to fall ill and turn once he got home. Felicity was able to restrain him, and Krennan was able to make him drink a potion to knock him out, but they only had a little time to bring him to Stormglen and restrain him, away from the city in a way to keep him from hurting other people or getting himself killed by the guard or hunters. Felicity had to keep a close eye on him, and after admitting to Genn why Faustus had gone missing the three worked towards trying to find a cure or aid to the curse, their working going double time once Genn was also bitten, but with the help of Krennan and Belyrsa found ways to keep him from turning. 

Faustus was thought dead due to his absence and the fact that if they couldn’t restore his will and mind he would basically be such anyways. Liam, though distraught, wasn’t entirely convinced, and had a hope in his mind that he was still somewhere out there. Instead he put on a brave face and told others that Faustus had instead fallen very ill, which many of the Greyguard were skeptical about, but kept quiet for the sake of their prince. One day however, Tess and Liam trailed Genn and Krennan to Stormglen, waiting until they left the abandoned building they were frequenting to try and find what they were hiding, only for them to get tracked down by feral worgen. Faustus, upon hearing Felicity call out for the siblings, as well as hearing them yell out, broke from the chains keeping him from escaping. He managed to intercept the worgen before he could attack the three, holding them off until Genn was able to handle it himself. They found that after the attack was deterred, that Liam and Tess could actually calm Faustus down enough to get him to focus on them, though even if he could focus and understand what they were saying he had no way of communicating back with them. Liam and Tess, however, were relieved to find Faustus alive, even if this experience changed him in the long run.

Eventually Sarath, Hugrim, and Drulos came to investigate Cedius and Ilaise’s disappearance, as Sarath and Drulos hadn’t heard from them in a while. They found the farm, and Ilaise’s spirit ended up guiding them to Faustus where Cedius was already waiting in Stormglen. After gathering enough energy due to the direness of the situation, Cedius and Drulos were able to call upon and bargain with Goldrin. If Faustus managed to prove himself to Goldrinn, and Cedius and Ilaise agreed to act as agents of Goldrinn as they continued to traverse the mortal plane, the wild god would agree to aid Faustus in returning to being himself. As Goldrinn tested Faustus, though the man had a strong will, he found himself unable to keep his own fear and rage in check when faced with visions of Hex and the Scourge. Sarath pleaded to Goldrinn that they didn’t just leave Faustus to himself like this, and though the wild god wasn’t going to do so in the first place, he instead allowed Ilaise to separate Faustus’ rage and fury into another section of his mind and make it temporarily dormant, giving Faustus control over himself again and allowing him to return to his human form, as well as letting him have a more intimate control over his worgen form. However, as a side effect Faustus had to constantly manage his rage, as due to this separation this feral anger could manifest in both forms instead of only his worgen form, which when he was armed made him highly dangerous. The solution wasn't perfect but it gave Faustus the opportunity to one day, possibly, be at peace with himself and learn to control that fury where it mattered, rather than letting it control him.

Before going on their way to hold their end of the deal, Drulos and Sarath were able to say their final goodbyes to their old friends, the three remained to help care for Faustus as reverting from worgen form, as well as the general exertion he went through over this period of time, left him rather weak and disoriented. After they made sure their technical ‘charge’ was cared for, Sarath flew the two out the way they came, but not before Faustus came to, learned of the situation, and made Sarath promise to one day teach him orcish due to meeting Drulos and learning what the druid and two shamans did for him that day, out of respect and thankfulness.

Felicity found him not long afterwards, surprised to see him suddenly back to himself, and was in fact rather skeptical about it at first. But after finally getting himself situated, and Felicity retrieved him some clothes for him, he was finally able to return to Gilneas, luckily being able to pass off his disappearance as an illness he had to be taken to Dalaran/be under Felicity’s family’s care for. As time went on he understood how this other side of himself started to manifest, namely that it tended to appear if he couldn’t control his emotions in general, or if he went too long without giving it control. He struggled to keep it under control at first, and knowing that he was struggling with it he found himself both talking less and keeping himself away from anyone that wasn’t the royals, Sibran, or Felicity and Krennan.

Liam was a major factor in helping Faustus get back to normal, and it helped that the other side of Faustus was still Faustus at the end of the day, and even as ferocious and hard headed the beast was he still cared deeply about the same people, and will take control if he feels the way Faustus acts normally is ill-equipped to handle protecting them. Liam was commonly the person Faustus was able to vent to besides Felicity, and when Liam knew it had been a while since a manifestation he and Faustus would often go hunting, whether it would be deterring worgen or just hunting normally to bring resources to the market. It also helped that the other side also respected Liam and his ability to remain calm in the face of adversity. Eventually Faustus started meeting with Sarath and Hugrim out in the old abandoned far, and from there he started to build connections with the Vanguard, and he learned to start meditating as a way of communing with himself and starting to pull himself back together.

Years went on, and the north gate rebellion came and went, Faustus did what he could to prevent as much bloodshed as he could, but the uprising and battle took a heavy toll on both sides. Faustus himself was heavily injured when he came into contact with two of his old childhood friends from Emberstone, Elicia and Jean, who had sided with Crowley, and though he was heavily injured, he was able to get them to put down their weapons and let him help them leave the battle under the promise that he wouldn’t get them arrested, and learning that though Faustus didn’t agree with all of Genn’s actions, that he understood the king was stuck between a rock and a hard place due to his pride, his stubbornness, and the pressure of the surrounding events. This injury, an axe wound to his side, did end up restricting him for a while. It required a lot of bed rest and he was designated to playing messenger while Sibran took his role as retainer back for the meantime. Afterwards, besides the small scale worgen attacks, things went back to normal and Faustus was able to return to his duties. That was until the large scale attack on Gilneas, and as the city fell and anyone not turned was pushed back into the outskirts, it took a heavy toll on everyone involved.

Faustus was tasked with helping the Greyguard get back on track, and as Krennan actually put together the potion that was meant to aid the feral worgen, he was also tasked to aid in capturing what many came to realize as their own friends, family, and peers. Liam however took the fall hard, feeling as though he had failed his people, and with Faustus’ near constant absence, he turned to drinking away his problems (as seen in the game, holy shit Liam why), something that Faustus and Tess tried to steer him away from but the prince was too caught up in his own head to listen. Felicity herself was occupied and gone from Gilneas from helping Dalaran alongside Ashton where she could during the events in Northrend and the ensuing aftermath, and the start of the cataclysm. After the Horde’s attack on Gilneas, and Liam’s subsequent bounce back onto his feet after being in a position to help his people again, Faustus stayed by his side and supported him where he could, the future of their city looking up. Until Liam took the arrow for Genn.

Losing Liam twisted something within Faustus, and though he and the separated side of him came together enough to cooperate, he gained this silent rage and ferocity that took a while to ever go away. The anger at the attackers, and the anger at himself turned him into a ruthless machine, pushing him to retaliate hard against the forsaken not long after the initial battle. He found refuge in Tess’ sympathy and hope, and with Felicity gone and busy elsewhere she was all he had left to bring him back down to earth. It was under her guidance that he came to focus his anger towards what mattered, pushing him towards the path of becoming one with himself again. He also had help during this journey thanks to his encounters with Anduin Wrynn, who he had initially met before the summit of the alliance in Darnassus. They got along, and were able to bond over learning about the events that had happened that they were unaware of. Anduin found that Faustus was a person he could vent his worries to without judgement of ability, and Faustus found Anduin as someone he could both look up to and protect. Though Faustus struggled with the loss of someone so close to him, and the loss of his homeland, he was able to find others that would help guide him back onto his feet, and push him to keep fighting for was he thought was right.

The Alliance and Azeroth (Ages 25-Present):

Faustus mostly found himself at Genn’s side after joining the alliance, and when he wasn’t, he was running messages and errands thanks to his affinity for teleportation and portal creation. He busied himself, and almost never gave himself a break initially in order to keep his mind off the events that had happened prior. Upon some of these errands he came across people who he would aid and build connections with. He reconnected with Elicia and Jean during and after the battle for Gilneans, helping them come to terms with the worgen curse. He met Baltor, a priest known for aiding the lost and wayward spirits, when they encountered each other in the rest area of an arena ring, after Faustus was captured by pirates during a trip back to Stormwind with some of the other soldiers. Finally he met Tyraanas, a Draenei paladin, on the front against garrosh’s horde in Ashenvale. This was also the time Faustus was introduced to the Vanguards, their leader Enahlien, and the figures that led the multiple sectors of the settlement. The era of the Cataclysm was primarily providing rushed aid to the front fighting Garrosh’s horde, protecting Stormwind when needed, and providing a connection of the alliance to the Vanguards as a defacto emissary.

It was around this time that Faustus started to form his own squad, with himself, Tyraan, Baltor, Elicia, and Jean. This team was some of the first sent to look for Anduin during the start of Mists, mostly due to personal request on Faustus’ behalf (because he was both incredibly worried and anxious know that Anduin could have been in danger). It was in Pandaria that Faustus was forced to pull himself together, as at that point he risked being consumed by several of the sha, and due to his determination to work alongside his anger and be at peace with it, rather than wrangle and control it, it gave him better control over himself in general and let him aid his team in combating the influences of the sha as well. The only time this nearly fell apart during the expeditions was when he discovered Anduin’s injuries after being crushed by the bell, his doubt and anger nearly getting to him until his team was able to, in payment for him helping them in the first place, help him calm himself to prevent the sha from manifesting.

From there Faustus and his team continued their work while Anduin was recovering, but knowing that Varian was already fretting over his son Faustus instead decided to support his decision to continue to encourage his people and his allies, being overbearing was likely only going to be a detriment anyways. As the events in Pandaria progressed, Faustus bounced between aiding the front with his team where he could, and introducing his team to the Vanguards and beginning to integrate himself with them more afterwards, building connections with Adonis, Hugrim, Hugrim’s family, as well as his crew aboard the allegiance who offered to aid the efforts in Pandaria so long as they weren’t caught up in the war itself in the process.

The issues in Draenor and all the events that take place during that time was actually the period where Faustus takes a break from the front and works on his connection outside of the horde and alliance. He was able to meet the horde emissaries, a forsaken monk who merely introduced himself as Ederi, and a goblin shaman named Glekkle. A lot of what this community was working on combating was the rising influence of Hex’s cult, as well as the threat of the Legion invasion that was starting to be known as an inevitable event. Hex wanted to pull apart the Vanguards, knowing that the cult would be destroyed upon them learning of their efforts to extend the reach of Thros. This issue for Hex became even more apparent when he discovered Pheles had started working with Felicity, Sarath, and Hugrim to combat the reach of the cult, and Tul’s own covens, in Kul Tiras itself. 

So, taking this opportunity now that several of the major Vanguard leaders were absent from the citadel itself Hex waged an all out attack against the citadel, catching everyone within off guard and forcing a large scale evacuation that drove the citizen’s living within to Dalaran, and brought Faustus, Ederi, Enahlien, Verelyn, an undead priestess that constantly worked with Sarath and Hugrim known as Ainade, to stay behind and attempt to prevent the cult from taking over the citadel. The position within Arathi and the research that could be used to breach the blighted lands into Azeroth was far too important to the vanguards to just give it up. After the five were swarmed with aberrations and found themselves in a losing fight, Ederi and Ainade locked themselves within Hugrim’s garden/research building, and did what they could from keeping the thankfully fireproof building safe, the other three were urged to leave and gather their strength until they could reclaim the citadel once more. In their attempted escape the three were captured, Hex himself was the one to do so personally as his members were tasked with raided the other buildings and preparing themselves to settle there. Hex’s use of fire and wicker abominations gave Faustus little time to get the other two out before they were seriously injured, and knowing that the Vanguard needed their leaders he elected to use most of his strength to break out of the construct’s grasp, and sacrifice his arm in Hex’s attempt to behead Enahlien so that Enahlien and Verelyn could gather enough of his strength to break free and run away.

Faustus used whatever time he had thought he had left, as he was bleeding out and knew that he likely wouldn’t have enough time to escape, was able to take his pistol while Hex was distracted by the two running and shot him in the knee so that he couldn’t chase after the two, before killing him for killing his parents, ruining a large part of his life, and attempting to break apart a people whose entire foundation came from pulling together through the turmoils of separation, loss, and exile. He knew, from the fact that his father persisted after his death, that this wasn’t going to be the last of Hex, but he was dying knowing that he was either going to combat him himself if he was unable to move on, or that he had broken the Cult’s leadership down enough to give both his team and the rest of the Vanguards enough time to regroup and mount a full attack against them to get the city back.

But it wasn’t like the Vanguards to leave their allies behind, and as Praeragos and Sarath managed to temporarily drive the cult from the citadel, giving them enough time to let Sarath rescue and take Ederi and Ain to Dalaran, Praer brought the remaining three to Stormwind where there was just a slim enough chance that Faustus could be saved. After magically locking the gardens, the mage tower, and the keep so that important information that was already guarded by other means couldn’t get tampered with further, Praer had carried and flown them back by opening a portal after he broke free of the cult’s vain attempts to restrain him with briar thorns. Baltor had felt the surge of energy from the portal from his room at the old town inn and from Praer’s spirit, and urged the rest of the team to follow the dragon as he landed in the fields not far from the keep, the team keeping the guards from targeting the blue dragon as they found they had to prioritize stabilizing Faustus and figuring out what the hell had happened to have caused this in the first place.

Thanks to Baltor’s, and later some assistance of Anduin’s, healing, Faustus had survived. However his injuries had forced him to retire from his position in the greyguard, as he had to focus on his recovery, and any extensive use of magic was out of the question due to his weakened state. He instead found himself staying in Stormwind, using the empty barracks next to the embassy to organize his own team on their missions, giving them aid in the only way he was able to at the time. This barracks was also used as a temporary gathering place for the Vanguard leaders, who either worked to be granted pardon or disguised themselves so that they could walk around the city easily. From here on Faustus, his team, and the vanguard’s worked to reclaim the citadel and also prepare for the impending legion invasion once they got word of Gul’dan’s freedom. Under Faustus’ and Enahlien’s planning, the efforts towards reclaiming the citadel was a success and they were able to start pushing their efforts towards rebuilding and reinforcing their position to prevent anything like this from happening again.

About a month before the invasion several of Faustus’ peers, a gnome named Lania, Felicity, a dark iron mage named Yvena, and Ainade proposed their latest work, which was a prosthetic arm meant to be attuned to his own abilities with magic, most of which he was able to use due to actually taking the time to recover and then train himself, making sure that he was still on par in that way while also learning to defend himself with only his left hand. While it was difficult, Faustus was lucky that he was left hand dominant anyways, and after giving it some thought he accepted getting the prosthesis. He also accepted the risks of getting it, as there was a chance that his body would reject it, and the impending realization that it would hurt, and he would have to give himself time to recover again. He trusted his team however, and he had gone a long way to trust Ainade, giving that she was known within the Vanguards for her research and talent with prosthetics and replacement given her situation as an undead.

Faustus played a similar role to before after he did what he could to aid Anduin’s ascension to the throne, ignoring his own feelings to losing Varian until he was away and able to express such without impacting others. His primary contributions came from sending aid to wherever him and his men were needed, and he spent a lot of his time fighting the legion in Stormheim, while working alongside Genn during that campaign for multiple reasons, Val’sharah, aiding the druids, his brother, and Sarath against the emerald nightmare, and on Argus, fighting demons head on once he firmly established his ability and the improvements granted to him by his new arm. Faustus proved to be an accomplished leader among his friends, and his ability alongside Enahlien’s own tactical prowess made their group a force to be reckoned with against the Legion. Upon the legion’s fall and things started to settle down, Genn welcomed Faustus back into the greyguard now that Faustus was back on his feet, and he proved to be more open, happy, and out there than he was before. 

Yvena, Tyraanas, Baltor, and Elicia urged Genn to name Faustus as the commander as their slowly growing team started to expand into a small army, and as the war with the horde started to pick back up, he considered it. It wasn’t until the war of thorns, and Faustus and the Vanguard’s efforts to aid in the evacuations, that Genn considered it and accepted it once the Vanguard’s pledged their aid against, and see specifically, Sylvanas’ path of destruction. 

Getting off the topic of Faustus briefly, it was also around this time that Liam was resurrected by Alonsus after Calia herself was resurrected. As Alonsus was standing on neural ground, but saw what Sylvanas had done during the gathering, he saw it fit to send some of his priests, Baltor, Ainade, Jean, and several others, as well as several aiding paladins, to recover Liam’s body to prevent him from being used against his own old friend and the alliance as a whole due to Jean’s accounts of the prince’s marksmanship itself. A pleasant surprise however came in the form that for one reason or another Liam’s body had not decayed since his death, and whether it was true or not, Jean had proposed that it may have been from the extent of the prince’s faith in both his people and the light, while Ainade proposed that like Calia, it may have been for the purpose of the light still needing them, and that his faith itself powered that. Liam went into a form of hiding after Faol had him ensure that he would return should anything go wrong, he rejoined the alliance, making himself known to aiding the soldiers as just merely being ‘the traveler’, a masked bowmen who seemed to appear in a time of need.

Back on topic, Faustus led said group during the battle for lordaeron, offering routed support as well as acting as the extraction soldiers for the horde prisoners. They also led the retreat once the main group had went to go confront Sylvanas. Upon returning to Stormwind, Faustus set out to help set up the Vanguard’s outpost with his friends, and they were organizing their supplies and working up until Nathanos had set fire to the city and the group had to turn their efforts towards putting the fire out. An attempted assassination on Enahlien turned into a near death experience for Faustus, as he had taken an arrow meant for him by one of the diversions, but due to the amount of aid the worgen were giving to the alliance, the most arrows in the assassin’s quiver was tipped in wolf’s bane. The assassin got away, and Faustus made his team focus on putting out the fires before he almost succumbed to the poison, narrowly getting saved by Liam as he had worked with Baltor beforehand over the possible issue of wolf’s bane being used against his friends and family. Liam left Stormwind for a while after that, getting too close to being caught before his evaluation of his situation was complete. The last thing he wanted to do was give those he cared about a false hope of his return if something suddenly went wrong.

Faustus instead went with Genn to Kul Tiras as he recovered, reprising his role briefly to work as an advisor to his team, to Genn, and to his brother as the alliance worked to bring the admiralty back into the faction. After a while after the incident and Liam was cleared to be alright for the time being, he returned to Faustus and his family to reveal his resurrection, Faustus being more than ecstatic to have an old friend and long time love back, and Genn quite frankly just being glad that he can, in fact, hold his son at least one last time before anything else happened. From there Faustus and Liam became a rather terrifying due who worked together to help clear the turmoil where they could, and Liam joined the Vanguard’s and became a major inspiration and leading force against the darker reaches of the time, working instead to fight against Azeroth’s deterioration and against the horrors of the deep.

———

So, there is everything I have so far, anything else as the story progresses will be updated onto this document, and I’ll have works, stories, and art pieces to go along with all this. If the read more didn’t work, I’m sorry, but I just wanted to have this all in one comprehensive place for my own reference as well. Thank you for reading :D

[starshinewriter]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: DuckTales (Cartoon 2017) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Della Duck & Donald Duck, Dewey Duck & Donald Duck & Huey Duck & Louie Duck & Webby Vanderquack, Della Duck & Dewey Duck & Donald Duck & Huey Duck & Louie Duck & Webby Vanderquack Characters: Della Duck, Donald Duck, Louie Duck, Huey Duck, Dewey Duck, Webby Vanderquack, Scrooge McDuck(briefly) Additional Tags: della's new to being a mom, and is doubting her ability, donald loves and supports his sister, Family Fluff, overuse of the word 'had' Summary:

Della sees Donald's parental instinct.

Alternative to Ao3:

Della didn't know how to be a parent. That was obvious since she first got back. And it was fine, or it was fine until she was around someone who did. Don't get her wrong she was glad her brother was back, ecstatic even, but it forced her to face the truth.

She didn't know what she was doing.

She first noticed after she happened to walk in on him and Louie talking about something in the den, it turned out to be her.

"It's okay that you're still not used to her." Donald had said. "It's okay to be mad or upset, as long as you don't dwell on it for too long and try to fix it."

"She said that if I didn't change that I was out of the family." Louie whispered. And even with his back to her she saw Donald's temper flare up at that. He had forced himself to take a breath before answering,

"She was scared and upset, but that doesn't excuse it. She had no right to say that. I'll talk to her, let her she went too far, I promise. You didn't deserve that kiddo." Louie had started to tear up before launching himself into his Uncle's arms and sobbing.

"I was so scared! I thought they were gone and that it was all my fault! And I didn't even get a chance to be relieved before she started to yell at me. Like she was the only one affected by it, like that wasn't the worst moment of my life. She took Louie Inc. away..."

Donald's face softened, "Oh kiddo." He had held him tighter and let him cry it out and Della had watched all this with a hand over her mouth in shock, she had gone too far hadn't she? She had let her anger get the best of her, what kind of a mom did that?!? "She didn't have any right to do that either, not permanently." He sighed. "If you still want the company you can have it back, not right now but... eventually."

Louie had pulled away and given him a weak smile, "Thanks Uncle Donald but, I think I'm good for now. I'm not ready to rich and that was the whole goal behind it. I think I'll wait a few years, try and learn some things from Uncle Scrooge."

Donald returned his smile, "I'm proud of you kiddo." And Della had to turn away after that. She had messed up, she had been trying to keep him from making the same mistakes that she did but she went about it all wrong. And she had severely hurt him because of it. She wouldn't be surprised if he never talked to her again. It was the least she deserved.

_______________________________________________________________

The next time she noticed it was because she was actively looking for her boys. But as she quickly learned, when looking for them if you found one the other two were usually close by. And she had found them in Donald's room with him, where they had been a lot since he got back, not that she could blame them. She hadn't really left his side much either. Except in times where she felt inferior to him, like that moment.  

Eventually most of the kids had wandered off except for Huey who had chosen to stay behind. Donald had raised an eyebrow at him and asked if something was wrong.

"I'm just really glad you're back, we missed you." Donald had replied that he missed them too, more than they could know and Huey continued. "Mom, she's great and fun but she doesn't really feel like a parent you know? I know she's been gone for our whole lives and that that's why but we really could've used a parent through all that. And it was fine when we thought you were on that cruise and relaxing but after we found out you weren't... We just really needed you here." Huey had looked down until Donald made him look at him.

"I know, I really wish I'd been here too, it couldn't have been easier for any of you. But I'm here now and we're gonna figure this out, all of us, together." He had promised and Huey's face lit up in a way she wished would permanently stay. It had never looked like that before. No matter what she had done he had never gotten that look. It had felt like a punch in the gut.

"I'm sorry we never figured out you weren't there. I sent postcards and got worried when I didn't get responses but after Uncle Scrooge got that call from you I let it go, I shouldn't have. I'm really sorry."  

"Don't beat yourself up, it's not your fault." And the fact that he hadn't been mad at all really blew her mind. That was not the Donald she remembered. He really had changed a lot for them, hadn't he? Why couldn't she do the same?

"It feels like it is. It must've been awful on the moon, and that island. I can't even imagine..."

Donald had gripped his shoulder, "Good, that's good. You don't need to imagine that." That was something she and him could agree on. None of the kids needed to imagine that. But that fact that her brightest boy didn't think of her as a parent only helped cement the fact that she wasn't. Not in the way her brother was. She wanted to be, she wanted to be so bad but she just wasn't.

_______________________________________________________________

The time after that was in less favorable circumstances, it was something she knew would happen eventually but still dreaded. One of the kids got hurt. And none of them were taking it well. She wasn't much better obviously but she had known she had to hide it for their sakes.

The moment Dewey had started freaking out, him being the one that was hurt, she wanted nothing more than to make it all better. But he didn't let her near him and was instead crying for Donald. The only problem was he and Scrooge had been way on the other side of the cave they were currently in. There was no way he was getting over to where they were anytime soon. Or so she had thought.

Not five seconds after she thought that he had come running in carefully scooping up Dewey and had tried to calm him down. And sometime after that Scrooge had managed to divert Webby's attention away but not the other two. That was her chance! She could finally do something right! Only they had refused to leave their brother's side and it looked like she had just made the situation worse. Again.

So she had turned her attention back to Dewey and her brother and had been surprised to see Dewey was almost completely calmed down. He was still upset but Donald seemed to be distracting him from the pain. She wasn't sure what he had been saying exactly but it was working and soon Dewey had been calm enough to tell him what happened.

"We need to go home. Now." Donald had said to Scrooge. The other kids had gone after them and she had never felt like more of an outsider.

He had been clingy to Donald for the ride home and his brothers were in similar states. And watching them interact it had always been clear the triplets adored their uncle but this had been different, it was like they were fully depending on him to make everything better. Why couldn't they be like that with her?

It had turned out Dewey had had a bruised rib and they had known that with a fall like his that they were lucky that that was it. It could've been a lot worse. And the minute they had been away from the kids Donald had been demanding to know how it happened, why hadn't she been looking out for him? She didn't have an answer, she still didn't, what kind of a mom was she?

_______________________________________________________________

The final time, the time that really drilled it in was the fact that he was able to help a child that wasn’t really his. Because she had been around long enough to know that the boys were more his than hers. But the fact that he had been able to help Webby too, that was real parenting. And the kind that she wasn't able to do.

She had apprehensively watched Webby walk up to Donald's hammock wanting to tell her not to bother him, that he needed a chance to relax but he had surprised Della.

"Hey, kiddo." He had said without opening his eyes. And Webby had climbed into the hammock like they had done that a thousand times before. As far as she could guess they did. "What's up?"

"I don't know, do you ever get one of those days were everything's too much?" Donald nodded. "I think I'm having one of those days. I can't stop thinking about everything that's happened. I know I was pretty much safe for most of the invasion but Uncle Scrooge, Granny, and my friends weren't. I don't know what I would've done if something happened to them."

"I know what you mean, but we're all okay now, that's the important part. That's the part to remember." He had rubbed her head and she snuggled into him. It was a very heartwarming sight if Della was being honest. But she had wondered why Webby didn't go to Beakley, she still did. She didn't completely understand it, maybe Donald was just better at certain things? Better than Beakley. Better than her.

Maybe that was why the kids had always turned to him. And why everything had been such a mess when he was gone.

"I know that, sometimes it's just hard. Like today. The others are all of playing some game but I just can't. It's all too much."

"And that's okay, everyone deals with things differently. And if what you need is a lazy day in a hammock then that's what you need." Webby had snuggled into him more with a content smile and Della had thought about how she never would have been able to come up with something like that, how did he do it so easily? How was he able to be a parent like it was some kind of switch? And why couldn't she do it?

That was the final nail in the coffin. She didn't know what she was doing.

_______________________________________________________________

And that’s why she was here now, outside his door. She wanted to know how to be a parent, she needed to know. She wanted to know how he did it. If only she could bring herself to knock. But she didn't have to because apparently his instincts extended to her too.

"Della? What's wrong?" He asked worriedly as he opened the door. Or maybe those were his twin instincts. That made more sense.

"What isn't wrong, Donnie? I don't know what I'm doing, I'm trying so hard but I keep messing up and making things worse. I'm not cut out to be a Mom." Donald stepped aside and let her in. She collapsed on his bed.

He sat next to her, "No, you're new to it. There's a difference."

"Huey doesn't see me as a mom, Dewey pushes me away when he's hurt, I'm pretty sure Louie hates me! Even Webby goes to you. You're the better parent Donald, I'm just... Della."

"Exactly, you're Della. Della Duck. And there is nothing that can stop you, not unless you let it. And you're right, I am the better parent but I've had ten years to perfect it and even now I still mess up. As long as you're willing to know when you mess up and fix it you can be a good parent. You can be a good parent Della, it'll just take some time." Della let out a wet sob, leave it to her other half to know just what to say to her.

"How do you do it?"

"Do what exactly?"

"Be you. Be the best brother I could ever ask for. The best person to raise my kids after I couldn't. I know that it was my fault and that I still have a lot to make up for but I'm glad it was you, Donald."

He rubbed his neck, "Awe geez Della I don't-"

She surged forward and hugged him. "Thank you." He hugged her back and they barely lasted a second before they started crying. This was something that both of them had needed. For ten years they had been separated, for ten years they had only been half of themselves but now they weren't. Now they were whole again. But Della still had no idea what she was doing. So Donald explained some things,

"Huey doesn't see you as a parent because you've only tried to be their friend or you've been way too strict, you have to find a middle ground. A balance. Dewey thinks the world of you, he doesn't want you to see him hurt or upset, he doesn't want you to see him as weak. You have to let him know it's okay for him to feel his emotions, all of them. And Louie... Louie, the thing with him is that he doesn't trust easily, and if you lose something you never had-"

"It's harder to get." Della finished. "Gah, I really messed up with him. I took my anger out on him, I made him question his place in the family. Even if that hadn't been my intention... when he did that I saw so much of myself in him Donald, and not in a good way. I knew I couldn't let him make the same mistake I did. But I shouldn't have..." She looked down. "I handled it completely wrong, I should've talked to him, should've let him know where I was coming from. And I definitely shouldn't have left him with something made by Gryo. I need to talk to him. To all of them."

Donald pulled away from her and let out a bitter chuckle, "You know I really wanted to yell at you after I found out you did all that. But really, what would that have done? You would've figured out how badly you messed up eventually, you did figure it out. There are just some things you don't say to kids. Especially your kids. There are some things that are never okay, no matter the situation."

Della nodded, "I have a lot to work on. With everyone. But I don't want to do it alone, please Donald I was alone for so long." Donald hugged her again. And she held onto him with everything she had. Her other half. Her lifeline. She was completely lost without him.

But now he was back. Now she was back. And they were gonna handle everything they way they should've before,

Together.

[littlemisssquiggles]

Do you think we'll see any Snowbird action in the next episode? CRWBY does seem to have a habit of hinting some kind of relationship between Crow and Winter. TBH I'm just a shipper with needs

OoohI’d love to see some Snowbird quips next episode. It’d be cute to see Qrow getunder Winter’s skin. You’re not the only one who feels like there was somethingbetween them before. My theory is that Qrow and Winter actually did share aprior intimaterelationship but it was during apretty rocky time for Qrow. Summer had just passed away and Qrow was dealing heavilywith the depression of that.

WhenI imagine Snowbird,I picture their relationship being somewhat like Mark Sloanand LexiGrey from Grey’s Anatomy.  A couple between an older man and a youngerwoman that had its fair share of ups and downs but no matter how many times thetwo would fall part, they always gravitate right back to one other because theywere soulmates or the closest equivalent to it.

Y’know what’sinteresting. I find it rather ironic that both of Qrow’s past hinted loveinterests share names that match seasons: Summer and Winter.

Summercomes before Winter in the order of the seasons so going back to my firstpoint, after Summer passed, Qrow probably hookedup with Winter for a while and things were probably beginning to get alittle serious between them. Maybe they even had one night of doing the ole meet and greetbetween the sheets which led a naïveyoung Winter to think that there might be a future with them or something.

Winter,more or less comes off as someone who appears strict and cold, only showing a softer side of herself to those she cares about. She onlyreserves her warmth for the people who are dearest to her. Before that was onlyfor family members like her younger sister Weiss.

QrowBranwen was probably the one man Winter actually allowed into her heart who wasn’ta person she respected like General Ironwood. This is going to sound cheesier than an omelette du fromage but…imagine if…at some point, QrowBranwen had managed to thaw away Winter’s frozen heart to the point that shemight have found herself falling in love with him---genuinely in love. Not the fakekind that her father used to manipulate her mother and their family.

Imagine…Qrow being Winter’sfirst love but just when Winter was beginning to enjoy that warmth, it’ssnuffed out by Qrow himself who basically made it seem like he didn’t feel thesame way. Imagine Winter Schnee losing her virginity toQrow---actually opening herself up to him to that degree which wasn’t easy forher. Only for Qrow to  pull the fuck boyapproach and basically tell Winter that it was just sex to him and nothingmore.

Theway Winter acts around Qrow reminded me of a bitter ex who got hurt by theirlast relationship and still hasn’t gotten over it. And rather than forgivingtheir ex and moving on, they remain spiteful and angry. I feel like that’s whathappened with Qrow and Winter. They hooked up. Winter was beginning to fall forQrow, thought they had something going on but the minute Winter got closer tothe Branwen Man, he suddenly pushes her far away.

Andto add more insult to injury, the next time Qrow interacts with Winter, hebasically acts as if their breakup didn’t affect him as much as it didher---that their entire relationship meant nothing which, for Winter, onlyadded more salt to the wound.

Nowjust to clarify something, even if Qrow Branwen did put the ole ‘Screw ‘em andLeave ‘em’ approach with Winter, I don’t think Qrow would willinglydo that. Qrow might look like a promiscuous charmer but in reality; he strikesme as the kind of guy who takes every relationship he has seriously. I mean, I’dexpect him to given his semblance and I’d like to think that Qrow’s  only ever loved two womenin his life.

Ina way, Qrow is like Tai Yang to me. My theory is that just as Raven was Tai’sfirst love, SummerRose was Qrow’s first love---the one he envisionedhimself having that happily ever after withbut because of his curse, Qrow had to unfortunately let Summer go. And the nexttime Qrow saw her, not only had she moved on with his ex-brother-in-law---theformer lover of his own sister but the two had also started a family together---the family that Qrow was supposed tohave.

SeeingSummer end up with Tai must’ve been quite the kicker forQrow if my theories about him and Summer are proven true. And to add moreinsult to injury, just when Qrow figured his luck in his love life couldn’t getany worse, Summer ends up dying in his arms while trying to protect him. Atleast by my theory.

Ican see Qrow’s past with Summer being a crutch that might’ve prevented him fromhaving any other meaningful romantic relationship afterwards. The one exceptionwas Winter. I’d like to think that Winter could’ve been the one other personQrow possibly saw himself with but…before that could go anywhere, Qrow had nochoice but to break Winter’s heart for two very good reasons.

Oneof them being his misgivings over his misfortune semblance and two…what if…General Ironwood wasn’t too thrilled about Qrow getting too chummy with his best operative and sort of gave Qrow awarning in regards to Winter. He didn’t actively try and stop Qrow frompursuing Winter but his omens about their relationship was enough to make Qrow reconsiderit.

Sojust like with Summer, Qrow walked away from another potential love interest.The only difference is while Summer moved on while still caring deeply forQrow, Winter was the opposite. Bitter and a bit snarky.

Butin a strange way, I’d like to think that Qrow prefers things between him andWinter to be this way. Winter’s hatred toward him acts as the perfect repellent to keep her from ever getting tooclose to him again and in Qrow’s head, that’s much better.

Eitherthat or…Qrow and Winter have no real romantic past. They just met on a whimthrough their primary affiliations with Oz and Ironwood. Qrow probably does like Winter but she’s so uptight that he gets a betterkick out of teasing the living daylights out of her rather than just straightflirting with her or asking her out on a date---like a kindergartener throwinga pencil at their crush trying to get their attention. And Winter, who’sprobably a bonified dumbass to her own feelings and romantic gestures ingeneral, mostly takes Qrow’s attempts at charming her as immature quips forlaughs at her expense which she doesn’t shy away from throwing any punches rightback at the Branwen male.

Basically;the Snowbird ship is just a pair of adult toddlers who don’t knowhow to express their feelings for one another properly so rather than talk theyjust channel their sexual tensions through sword fights and naïve bickering. Stillvery entertaining to watch though.

I’dlike to believe that if Qrow and Winter we to stop their quips, they might realizethat they oddly like each other more than they realized and that can turn intoa romance.

Atleast, that’s my theory. Man I’d love if Winter’s return drops the bomb on herand Qrow sharing a former romance. I like the idea of Qrow seeing Winter as his second chanceat a happy ending but once again he’sforced himself to not take it out of fear that he might end up losing Winterthe way he lost Summer.

Ironically,the same could be said for Winter in a sense. I doubt her experiences inromance have been favourable. I mean just look who she has as her example. IfJacques is the type to use his family to get what he wants, imagine if therewas a time Jacques had planned to marry Winter off to some rich smuck butIronwood manged to save Winter from that by awakening her true potential. Afterthat Winter must’ve shut herself off from the possibility of love and a lifewith a companion. Who knows?

Idunno, if Snowbird gets to a point where Qrow falls for Winter andbucks up the balls to ask her to marry him orwhatnot, he better do it in a similar fashion as Edward Elric from FullmetalAlchemist Brotherhood just to have that parallel. Now that I think about, Qrowand Winter kind of remind me of Ed and Winrey. Huh…very interesting.

Don’tworry Local,I’m a shipper with needs as well and I honest would love tosee Winter and Qrow hook up because I think they can work and again, I cannotstress this enough, it’s bought time Qrow Branwen gets his own happily everafter.

Hesays he’s cursed but perhaps Winter will be the white knight that Qrow has beenwaiting for to lift his curse.

MaybeWinter will get him to stop drinking or even better, perhaps Qrow will make thehonest decision to seek professional help to aid with his alcoholism anddepression because he wants to make what he and Winter have work. #QrowDeservesAHappyEnding#SnowbirdEverAfter

Waita minute, if Qrow and Winter were actually get together then Weiss, Yang andRuby would become family through marriage.

Weissis Winter’s sister. If Qrow and Winter got hitched, Qrow would become Weiss’sbrother in law. But Qrow is Ruby and Yang’s uncle. So…if Weiss become’s Qrow’ssister in law, that would make her Ruby and Yang’s…aunt-in-law? What?

NowI’m imagining Yang and Ruby poking fun at Weiss and teasingly calling her ‘auntie’.

IfQrow does end up getting engaged to Winter at some point---if possible---then Ihope Qrow reconciles his longstanding friendship with Ozpin in time so that Ozcan at least be there at his wedding. Ozpin was practically the closest thingto a best friend and a father-figure to Qrow. Oz has to be there to see Qrowget his happy ending because I’d like to think that’s something Oz wanted forQrow since they met. But these are just my theories here.

LittleMissSquiggles (2018)

[write-stuff-for-life-blog]

Review: Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom

NOTE: I actually saw this movie in theaters but since it’s DVD release was yesterday I figured I’d post my review of it here. I might ramble on for several paragraphs in these reviews, especially if I feel strongly about something, so I’ll try and make it a point to post a short rating at the top as well as a more in depth one at the end.

NOTE THE SECOND: I don’t usually care about spoilers in these reviews so read at your own risk.

1 out of 5 stars. Only watch on Netflix if you exhaust all your other options.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is written by Colin Trevorrow (previous writer and director of the last entry in the franchise) and Derek Connolly and was directed by J.A. Bayona. Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard reprise their roles as Owen Grady and Claire Dearing respectively and are sent back to Isla Nublar by Jon Hammond’s previously never mentioned before former partner billionaire Ben Lockwood played by a James Cromwell who can barely bother to keep his eyes open throughout the movie. I, in fact, share that same sentiment.

Usually in these reviews I try to touch on all the aspects of said medium: visuals, camera work, writing, directing, acting, etc. But this review is going to focus mainly on the writing and acting because both are so atrocious all the other aspects are inconsequential. 

I didn’t think the first Jurassic World (JW) was as great as it needed to be for a soft reboot / revival of such a beloved franchise but it did have several memorable moments. The leads were charming enough to make you forget that they lacked meaningful character arcs (Claire does have one but the movie doesn’t care about it that much) and the action in the second half of the film was pretty cool (specifically T-Rex and Raptor and Giant Alligator Thing vs. the Indominus Rex). So for the second go around I was hoping that the filmmakers would take the time to really get it right and do the franchise justice. My hopes were far too high.

The only two performances that were worth anything in Fallen Kingdom (FK) were the two returning leads, Pratt and Howard. Howard is a decent enough actress but I’ve never seen a performance from her that I really love and FK continues that trend. Claire does undergo a change from shrewd, cold businesswoman to animal rights activist and that does give some depth to her character but it happens off screen during the three years between JW and FK. It was a little jarring at first but I swallowed it better when the film took a minute to explain her motivations. Pratt was as Pratt as ever as Owen is exactly the same through this movie as he was when we first met him in JW. I fear there’s a real risk for Pratt here as it seems as though he’s becoming another Will Smith or Tom Cruise. He is varying degrees of his usual charming and charismatic self in whatever project he appears in. Owen is just Pratt but outdoorsy to the extreme. Star-Lord is just Pratt with his ego turned up to eleven. Andy from Parks and Rec is just Pratt as a dumb man-child. And I guess that’s fine. Plenty of stars have made careers doing the same but actors actually stretching themselves and challenging themselves to become someone else will always be more impressive.

One thing that annoys me about modern blockbusters are their tendencies to inject new secondary characters into each following installment while completely ignoring the B cast from the previous entry. In the original Jurassic trilogy it did make some sense to do that as each sequel followed the branching lives of Ian Malcolm and Allen Grant who, we can presume, never encounter one another again after the first film. But here there’s little justification for it. JW’s comic relief characters Lowery and Vivian, played by capable comedy actors Jake Johnson and Lauren Lapkus respectively, are nowhere to be seen in this movie. Instead we have Franklin Webb, a spazzy tech guy played by Justice Smith, and Zia Rodriguez, a ball busting veterinarian played by Daniella Pineda. I don’t have much to say about Pineda, she was decent enough and served her purpose, but Smith … Oh my God. I believe this guy will go down in history as the absolute worst character in any Jurassic movie ever. Yes, he is even worse than every child character in all of the movies combined. He does nothing for the movie other than to scream in a high pitched voice when something scares him. Everything scares him. It’s always played for laughs but the joke falls flat on its face every time. The movie thinks it’s funny for a grown man to shriek in terror and scream out loud the thing that’s scaring him. “Lava!” “T-Rex!” “Social interaction!” All right, I made up that last one but the character is so cliché he might as well have said it. And what’s more there is no reason for this character to be here. The movie wastes a fine opportunity to bring back JW’s Lowery who was also a tech guy. In fact it even makes sense for him to run with Claire in her animal rights activism as he was a huge fanboy for Jurassic Park. He had toy dinosaurs all over his work station, he loves them! And it makes even more sense for him to return to Isla Nublar because he was familiar with the park’s computer systems. Why isn’t he joining Claire? He was courageous and had some genuinely funny interactions with Vivian. He certainly would have been better than Spazzy McScreamy.

Speaking of trends let’s talk about the obligatory child character. Isabella Sermon makes her big screen debut as Maisie Lockwood, Ben Lockwood’s granddaughter. Of all the new additions to the franchise she’s the standout as her performance has a depth and range most child actors would struggle to convey. Now one thing about the Jurassic movies is that their child characters were usually pretty capable in some way or another. Hammond’s granddaughter in JP reboots the computer system. Malcolm’s daughter in Lost World is able to gymnastic a raptor to death (yeah it’s a dumb scene but she saves her dad). The teenager in JP3 survives Isla Sorna alone for eight weeks. And the brothers in JW are able to fix a derelict jeep and rescue themselves. FK started out following this trend of capable children with Maisie … until it abandons the idea so we can have a “monster creeping through a child’s bedroom” scene. This completely undermined her whole character. Up until then the movie had established her as smart and independent and capable as hell. She snuck into the secret lab, spied and hid from the bad guys, busted out of her room which she’d been locked in, and climbed atop buildings all secretly by herself without help from a single grown up. But the minute the new hybrid dinosaur goes after her, which she had seen several times before then, she immediately forgets how capable she is and hides under her bed sheets. This might be the most heinous example of bad writing in this whole movie. Mixed messages? Okay, fine. Forgettable action sequences? Whatever, that’s most of Hollywood anyway. But please, for the love of God, have consistent characters!

Now the villains. Ugh.

BD Wong returns as the dastardly Dr. Henry Wu, the mastermind genius behind the dinosaur cloning process, the I-Rex, and FK’s new hybrid the Indoraptor.  It would seem that in the three years since JW InGen and its parent company Masrani Global have cut Wu loose as he’s now partnered with a new financier Eli Mills played by Rafe Spall, the CEO / director / executor of Ben Lockwood’s … estate? Company? Trust fund? I don’t remember the movie specifying what Mills’ job was, only that he was another white collar villain (because we haven’t seen that before in a Jurassic movie). Toby Jones makes an appearance as Mr. Eversol, an auctioneer for the high rolling criminal underworld, and Ted Levine plays Ken Wheatley, the leader of a disposable mercenary force who has an odd fetish for collecting dinosaur teeth. And that is literally all there is to the villains. Each of them is cartoonishly shallow to the point that Wheatley is a parody of an archetype and all Dr. Wu needs is a mustache to twirl. True, the villains have never been that big of a deal in the Jurassic movies as the dinosaurs have always been the main attractions but not even Vincent D’Onofrio’s Hoskins from JW was this bad and in a movie full of weakly written characters he was the weakest link.

And let’s not forget the dinosaurs. They are there. Not as much as you’d like but they’re around. The big draw for Owen this time around is to save Blue, the only surviving raptor from the pack he raised and trained, from Isla Nublar’s impending volcanic eruption. FK plays this up as though Blue was always the equivalent of a loyal attack dog but it conveniently forgets that JW established her as a dog capable and willing to bite the hand that fed her. The scene from the previous movie in which Owen is in the raptor enclosure is a tense moment because he is under threat from all the raptors, Blue included. In fact when the I-Rex persuades them to go after the humans all the raptors focus in on Owen. There was that one moment when Owen pulls off Blue’s head camera at the end of JW but to rewrite the relationship as though she were a loyal golden retriever, I feel like that was not earned in the slightest. And the main attraction this time is the new hybrid, the Indoraptor, essentially a smaller version of the previous movie’s I-Rex. FK presents this abomination of genetic manipulation as an ultimate monster but it really just looks like rejected concept art of the I-Rex. Also the Indoraptor is only in half of the movie. The I-Rex in JW was a better monster because it was terrorizing the island for almost the whole runtime. Plus the I-Rex has some decent build up and a good reveal. Here, it feels like the movie couldn’t be bothered. “By the way, we made another hybrid dino. Here it is.” I did enjoy the return of more practical animatronics over every dino being CGI but if you saw the last film this one doesn’t have anything special for you in that regard.

Let’s talk about Trevorrow’s writing. It’s awful. Like a pile of hot rancid garbage awful. The biggest problem with JW is that it completely ignores the moral of the original. JP was a cautionary tale that proves whenever man tries to exert his will over nature he will lose and just because we can do something it doesn’t mean we should. It’s classic man vs. nature ending with man being humbled. JW said, “Hey look, we’re going to keep doing that ethically questionable thing most people believe we shouldn’t be doing and wield the power of a god with no regards to any possible consequences,” and gets upset when the monster it created wreaks havoc. But does FK finally learn that lesson and try to take the franchise somewhere new that doesn’t lead the characters into being idiots who keep going back to the island? Do Michael Bay’s Transformers movies understand subtlety?

More than ever this movie has dumb characters making dumb decisions that nobody with a brain can follow. The villains want to capture the dinos and auction them off to billionaire criminals because these crime lords want them for pharmaceutical reasons (but why though?), the ability to hunt one like a big game hunter (because we also haven’t seen that before), or for weaponization. Let’s touch on that last point. The villains justify it by saying animals have been used in combat scenarios for centuries when armies rode to battle on horses and elephants. And the movie might have had a point if either one of those transportation methods hadn’t become outdated before the fifties.

Now just for the sake of argument I’ll list off a few more examples for this movie’s case: K-9 units, bomb detecting dolphins, and pidgins have all historically been used by one military or another at various times. But here’s the common thread among all those examples: none of those animals are predisposed to ripping a man’s head off in a single bite. Why do you think it isn’t common practice for a military to use lions and tigers and bears? And let’s take a closer look at the proliferation of working dogs and horses. Could it be that thousands if not millions of years of closely co-existing with humans have made them predisposed towards not killing us on sight? What’s that called? Oh yeah. Domestication!

Whether we’re talking about fiction or not, training an animal that never co-existed with humans so it can become an attack animal is not a good idea any way you slice it. Any semi-intelligent person can recognize that there are way too many variables to take into account. Oh but what about Blue, I hear you asking. Owen proved that raptors can be trained with Blue. That may be true but one successful instance against a multitude of failures does not prove the concept. Sure the Polish Supply Brigade around WWII kept a bear named Wojtek that would carry their supplies for them but you don’t see cargo bears being implemented throughout the world’s militaries these days. Do you know why? Because they’re freaking bears! They could go in for a playful swipe and nick your carotid by accident you MORONS!

And that leads me to this movie’s message. Apparently FK believes these animals have as much right to life as any other endangered species. That’s the whole reason Claire wants to go back so she can save them. But the film is bookended with Jeff Goldblum reprising his role as Ian Malcolm speaking before a congressional committee on how much that is a bad idea. He argues that nature selected the dinos for extinction millions of years ago and bringing them back was a mistake. The volcano erupting and eradicating the clone dinos on Isla Nublar, he says, is nature’s way of correcting that mistake. So the film opens and closes arguing why protecting these creatures from a second extinction is the worst. And yet we spend most of the runtime doing exactly that.

Seriously?

Malcolm has always been the ultimate voice of reason in these movies and we as an audience are inclined to agree with him given the proof each movie provides for his argument. There are four previous films illustrating why bringing the Earth’s most dangerous predators back to life is a horrible idea. And now that nature wants to correct the mistake you’re going to defy that decision?

The film uses Maisie here to make this case. The dinos are technically clones and we learn that Maisie is a clone as well so now we’re using clone rights to justify saving the dinosaurs. It is a weak argument thrown in at the last moment. Arguing for conservation is good and all but how well are you going to side with that argument when the T-Rex is meandering through a neighborhood gobbling up pedestrians left and right? These animals have lived on an island their entire lives. Aside from T-Rex who visited San Diego in the 90s they have never seen a town. The only human made structures they are familiar with were the derelict park buildings that the movie shows them waltzing through all the time. Even our own real world wild animals don’t understand that they should stay away from human settlements, how well do you think Blue is going to do the first time she’s caught in the headlights? But apparently they have a right to live because they are just as alive as Maisie the clone is so let’s end the movie by releasing all these dangerous animals, most of which are as large as a rhino or elephant, into the American countryside.

Sure, forget about public safety. Forget that dinosaurs had their chance but nature selected them for extinction over sixty million years ago. Forget about all the indigenous plant and wildlife that is now under threat because you just loosed at least eleven different dinos onto the world. Forget about how their nesting habits might destroy the landscape like nutria in Louisiana. What was your motivation again? Conservation? Give me a break.

Honestly this movie makes me glad Trevorrow was fired from Star Wars Episode Nine. This proves that he has no clue what decent writing looks like and has no regard for what the original was trying to say. Just because he was given the opportunity to make these films doesn’t mean he should have.

 1 star out of 5

A forgettable and messy film that slowly meanders through the second and third act with no sense of purpose other than to say, “Ooooh look. It’s a dinosaur!” And it doesn’t even say that well.