#but only because legit she has to work on christmas

[arkangelo-7]

What do the members of the Batfamily want for Christmas? No one asked but I headcannoned it either way:

Bruce: Nothing. At least, that’s what he says. But it’s a boldfaced lie. What Bruce actually wants for Christmas? One of those cheap ass plastic drones you can buy at Best Buy or Walmart. He’s saw them on a commercial once and back in ‘08 and has wanted one ever since. Dick is the only one privy to this information, and as such makes it a point to get one for Bruce each year. (They have a tradition on New Years to fly it around the Batcave until it inevitably breaks and cackle wildly at how stupid it looks.)

Dick: Olaplex and a 401k. However, when Christmas Day comes around, he gladly accepts the bougie shampoo/conditioner but refuses to accept the half-mil check Bruce left in his stocking. (He doesn’t need daddy’s money, Bruce, seriously lay off—)

Jason: a crowbar. He asks for this as a joke and gets pissed when Dick actually gets him one. He spends half an hour chasing Dick though the Manor, cursing him out and threatening to beat him up with the menorah. They almost set the Christmas tree on fire. When they’re done Bruce awkwardly gifts Jason a signed, collector’s copy of the Hunger Games trilogy. (He’s wanted it since he was twelve.)

Cass: she’s more of an experiment type of person, and asks to go see a new ballet that’s premiering in downtown. Bruce gives her a cute card with a promise to take her out on a daddy-daughter date to the Gotham Theater. (He rented out the whole place—they’re getting a private showing.)

Tim: Starbucks. Like, the company. Says it’s because he wants to start a monopoly on coffee to insure that his supply won’t be cut off, and price cap the Carmel macchiatos at $3. Bruce gets him a gift card instead.

Steph: Ugg Slippers. Remember that infamous video of that teenage girl getting Ugg slippers and being so so excited and running around the house screaming while her dad was confused and saying, “they’re just slippers…?” Yes. Yes this is Steph and Bruce.

Duke: for a heating system to be installed in his armor. Jesus Christ, it gets cold in Gotham in February, and the insulation is good but Duke’s the type of person who always had cold hands and feet, so he really fucking needs that armor update. (Bruce actually fixes this before Christmas and gets Duke a subscription for Planet Fitness because he saw a commercial for it at work. Duke is confused. Bruce is trying.)

Damian: an Alpaca. Surprisingly, he actually gets this. Bruce legit imports an alpaca from, like, whenever the heck those things come from and gifts it to Damian on Christmas with a bright red bow. (When Dick asks why he never got a hamster all those years ago when he asked, Bruce says it’s because Damian will actually keep the Alpaca alive. Dick has no further argument.)

(Bonus +!) Alfred: a Keurig. He asks for this every year. At this point he has a stockpile of Keurigs and truly, truly does not need an another one, but it’s all that he asks for so that’s what he’s getting. (The kids all write heartfelt letters though to put in his stocking, which is what Alfred actually wants for Christmas.)

[ixiot-ghostrebel]

Hi! Finally able to request. I really enjoy your work!

Can you try a creator who use their power through music (like singing or playing instrument) in an Imposter-AU with the Archons? (The voice of the Creator is heard as the sound of nature like wind or water, though. No one knows their true voice)

Thank you so much.

🎄Merry Christmas🎄

Welcome @peaceindreams ! I'll see what I can do with Your Request :D

Also VERY LATE Merry Christmas—I'm writing this a few days after Christmas.

Archons Realize Reader is a MUSICIAN WOAHHH

To be honest, you were kinda just minding your business when the Archons found you and your ever-singing glory.

They SHOOKETH so good job! Let's nitpick at their reactions! >:)

(Warning: Might be OOC!)

Venti

Wisp boi HELLA SHOOKETH. But he also happi boi so good job!

Wants to hear your voice sing and not the wind just continues to gently smack his face. Don't get him wrong, he's probably the only one who can actually listen and understand and compute with what you're singing, but like he really wants to hear your actual voice. He thinks it'll be such a treat!

"Your Graceee...Is there a way to let these humble gods hear your voice? Pleaseee? This bard will make a ballad about it and the world shall start spewing about it right after!~ Hehe, it'll be a big hit, one as grand as your visage!"

He really wants to hear you sing now. Good luck explaining that you got no control over dis :)

Zhongli

GRANDPA ABSOLUTELY SHOOKETH. But he finds it pleasant to see that you're having fun and enjoying your time in Teyvat.

Unlike the airhead beside him, he cannot understand what you are singing, and he feels kinda disappointed that he can't enjoy it too. He would share the memory—

Ahem, anyways. Loves it, 100%. Bro's a huge supporter even though he legit has, like, zero comprehension of the situation. He's also giving Venti some bombasic side-eyes.

"Your Grace, please do not be pressured by this wind god. While it would be a stunning blessing, do NOT feel like you owe us anything." You know those memes where like, one person is forcing someone's head to bow while they bow to apologize to whoever got offended? Yeah, it's that one meme except it's Zhongli making Venti bow for his idiocy.

Grandpa wants to hear your voice fr this time, but bro's not gonna force it upon you. Grandpa will, nevertheless, share the memory over osmanthus wine, because "Osmanthus wine tastes the same as I—"

Ei

Raiden Ei, Raiden Ei...I honestly think she feels like she doesn't DESERVE to hear you sing. Like, she feels like she just intruded on your personal space and she crossed some sort of line.

But the wind's pleasant and all of the surrounding area is practically glowing as you sing. Your voice practically carries throughout the place, becoming the nature, the water, the wind, everything.

"Your Grace, you need not heed to the request at all. We are more blessed to be in your presence enough." As much as she's getting more and more used to the present times of Teyvat, she's still kinda stuck in her ways a little. She still thinks of you highly and does not let her beliefs falter.

She really doesn't think she deserves to hear your voice, but she is also very curious. Never wants to push though because she's old-school.

Puppet Shogun looking at this and going "This will be forever engraved in eternity" as Ei is shaking the Puppet Shogun by the shoulders like "NO, WE SHOULD NOT BE HEARING THIS WHAT KIND OF PROGRAM ARE YOU ON I DID NOT PROGRAM YOU LIKE THIS—"

All in all? Mental crisis! :D

Nahida

Cute god loves you! She loves how the flowers bloom, how the wind flows, how the water speaks—not even analogies can describe the amazingness of it all!

She's grinning so wide with such wholesome-wide eyes, like an actual child discovering music for the first time or smth ykwim? IT'S ADORABLE IS WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY.

"Your Grace...is it possible if we could see this more? You don't have to, of course, but this is really amazing!" She's practically GLOWING with excitement and nervousness. While Nahida wants to hear you sing and see you enjoying your time, she doesn't want to push boundaries!

Safe to say, she'll support whatever your answer will be!

Furina

Girl's flabbergasted. She thinks she might have been sent to both celestia and hell because it was hard to compute whether she was trespassing or if she was being blessed.

Furina is utterly speechless to how your voice alone commands presence and power without even needing to try so hard. Anyone, absolutely anyone, can tell you are truly the Almighty Creator.

Though she's retired from being the Hydro Archon, she still has the slight dramatic flare she has had for 500 years. And she's got to say, she absolutely loved your performance!

"Your Grace, if I could humbly suggest a request on the behest of the follow archons beside me." Furina dramatically bows a little. "May we be humbled by your presence, and continue to gaze upon our unfathomed eyes of what a real god can truly do in the likes of the world? I'm sure this will bring many beautiful pieces of art—be it music, visual arts, dramatic arts, and so on!" Girlie doesn't realize she made a beautiful monologue about your singing on the spot, but one thing's for sure—she loves you and you singing, even if her ears can't understand it. It was still a beautiful piece.

After all, she was the All-Powerful Hydro Archon before she retired. She knows power and art when she sees it, and you bypass all forms of mortal concepts. You're practically her favorite musician!

Please grace her—I mean them—with your singing! It's too beautiful to miss!

Ghost Rebel Side Notes: I am SAD I couldn't finish this when it was still AROUND CHRISTMAS SOBBING, but I hope y'all like this post, though! Hopefully my next post won't take too long—but I'm not gonna say anything because rn I'm EATING those words up like it's for breakfast lol—I'll see you all next time :)

✦ Check out The Ghost Rebel’s Blog Description & Info Page to See if Their Mailbox is Open! ✦

[yandere-yearnings]

HEAVENCALL (??? x Fem!Reader)

feat. Cecilia Romano

♡ oneshot, approx. 1k words

♡ post-specific warnings: NSFW, sub + bottom afab reader, fingering (reader receiving), 'good girl' used on reader, depictions of gore and violence, masochism & sadism, Stockholm syndrome, abuse, collaring, blood play, (extreme) knife play, implied mind break, implied imprisonment, vaguely implied reference to cannibalism, extreme toxicity, DDDNE

♡ a/n: most important thing to anyone reading this is to pls be mindful of the content warnings above and to not read if you think it could be triggering for you. this is vv dark fiction and i legit cannot stress that enough. a lighter christmas fic will be posted soon, which can be viewed alternatively.

this is @unhappy-last-resort's gift for our secret santa fic exchange!! unhappy i'm gonna need you to forgive me for how shitty this turned out lmao. i lied when i said it would be my last rewrite and got wasted so i could churn smth out before today. i'm burnt out to all fuck and too tired to fix the medical inaccuracies drunk me did not consider so pls pretend that the femoral artery does not exist and the bleeding is venous otherwise our reader is technically dead and not just passed out💀 this is purely a work of fiction. yandere behaviour in real life is a cause of concern. proofread, unedited.

♡♡♡

It was because you hadn’t seen light in days. Chained up to this wall, waiting like a dog for your angel to come down to you — sensitive eyes, slithers of blinding white around her silhouette looking like a luminous halo. Deaf to her footsteps, blind to the blood on her dress or the stench of it, all you knew was her when she put her hands on you. Learning to treasure it, since it would only be you here grieving every touch you were deprived of when she left.  

“Miserable thing,” fingers smoothing out in your hair turn violent, she tugs, “feel special yet?”

When she chokes you, you do. You think the collar might just cut into your flesh from the force as Cecilia pulls on it. Lips meeting hers, you are whole again with the way her nails dig into your cheek, like she wants to rip the skin right off. Bringing the claim she has on each corner of your soul right to the surface, the sole thing that has become easy for you to understand is that you are ruined for this world.

“Please…” you beg, and you remain unaware of what for. There is something pulsating inside of you, blood beating bones from depths in which a consuming rot grows ugly. Cecilia’s scalpel shows an animal starved, and you recognise that it’s you. The spit and drool come like magic, she wets your dry throat easy with just a few fingers in your mouth — you are hungry. Her knees hit the ground for you, in turn your heart wants to come right up as penance for your unworthiness.

Thin gown bunched up into the crease of your groin, too light to feel any warmth from it — and you are too taken by the coldness of the blade on your thigh to care. Aching for the push, so your body could give way and you could feel the sharpness nestle inside of you, to wrap around something, to bury it in the grave of an open wound. Cecilia keeps a distance your cuffed wrists cannot close, and your desire drips from you with nothing to hide, nor cling to.

Spine lined with explosives, the first graze has the pleasure spark seriatim; the release of pressure you had been neck-deep in brutalises you, and you are delirious on the feel of being ripped apart without the motions. Each score burns. New layers of you are uncovered and exposed to this world and Cecilia wrenches your head down to watch. 

Mouth agape, your drool parts a translucent line over the pooling sangria. “More,” pleading for it, despite how muffled it came out. You want her to rip this chunk of you right off. You want to be between her teeth and down her throat. You want, and it’s butchering. “Deeper,” the tears come with your chest squeezing, come with the choked up moan when her digits bear down on your tongue harder. Your mistake is clear to you the moment you see the wash of those baby blues lock on you, the reverie of bringing the sky down to your prison and the vastness as you lost your mind to it has your breath hitching.

Ringing in your ears dulled to the scattering greys when Cecilia hits you, cheekbone smashing against the wall, sending the vibrations all throughout your skull. Ecstasy takes on the taste of metal. Sure enough, the savage inside of you is unsettled, is not yet satisfied.

“When have I ever let you command me?” Her knife edge twists, makes ribbons of your tissues — makes you writhe deliciously. “Do you think you have a will?”

“No.” The answer needs no contemplation, it has been ingrained in you. “‘M sorry,” your vision spots when you crane your neck, you’ve been putting more and more of your weight into the bricks, your shackles sting. “Was so good I went dumb, ‘m sorry. I won’t do it again,” you sniffle, “p-please…”

Acutely aware of the moment the surgical steel leaves you; biting your lip to suppress your whimper when the air hits. “That’s better,” and you are sure this is a punishment until Cecilia takes your face, “see, you know how to be a good girl, don’t you?”

Something hot floods your guts, you’re nodding before you even have a chance to rub your thighs together — not that you’d be allowed to. Her palm is pressing right to the laceration, she keeps you splayed apart like that, and her nails are mere millimetres away from showing you a supernova. Red tracks streak a trail all the way to your core, the fabric in contact with it is damp, is threading clear strings to a place that’s throbbing with need to be desecrated.

All your nerves fray when she sinks in, and just like that, the ability to latch onto her human caress is wasted on you. Only remembering how to stay agape, how to curl your toes and tear from your bottom lip to hold back your moans. Your walls are sopping for her, they slobber just as much as you do for the euphoria Cecilia imposes into you. Gasping her name, flashes of a world outside you no longer want to return to, legs trembling when her thumb comes up. She plays you so well, makes a mess — makes a masterpiece out of all your misery and mortality alike.

Whispering, “you were my best decision,” — and like a blessing, your undoing lays rest to you. Pink slick and pain, everything becomes sweet in this swarming black. Angels. Her laughter, a hymn. Singing. Heavencall.

[bloodismymedium]

Ur urbanspook headcannons? brava. Spectacular give me 15 more of these

Your wish is my command anon🫀🫀🫀

🦷 Mona’s favorite holiday, predictably enough is Halloween and she loves the autumn season in general. Bill meanwhile, as a stark contrast, REALLY gets into Christmas.

🦷 Mona is touch starved and she doesn’t know it. She completely melts when Bill runs his fingers through her hair or touches her for any reason but she tries to hide these reactions since she doesn‘t want to come off as “weak”.

🦷 Nathan Cole was Bill’s partner and the more level-headed of the duo, being the one who had to reel Bill in whenever he got “overzealous” during police work. Nathan’s a legit good cop and generally nice guy while Bill was an asshole who was the epitome of police brutality.

🦷 The Gimp seen in HELL was Mark, as in “Mark The Machine” who was a blogger/YouTube personality who covered real crime and serial killers and was documenting Mona and Bill’s murders for years, which piqued Mona’s interest in him as she believed he genuinely appreciated her “art”, resulting in her stalking him for a while until finally kidnapping him and turning him into a pet, which is the full extent of her showing any actual affection towards someone. The title of Mark’s “portrait” is a reference to his background as an Internet personality and how Mona has managed to break him down to essentially just a machine, a toy for her to use as she pleases.

🦷 As mentioned before, Mona has an extreme allergy towards sunlight and photosensitivity that makes direct contact with sunlight very painful for her. As a result, Mona only goes out late at night or very early in the morning when the sun isn’t up. On cloudy days she’ll wear a “disguise” composed of a sun dress, opera gloves, stockings, a sun hat, a tattered parasol and a pair of sunglasses, allowing her to comfortably be outside during the day while also protecting herself from any potential rays that may be peaking out.

🦷 Mona is double jointed and is extremely flexible as a result. Her flexibility and ability to contort herself comes in handy in her murders as she is an expert in hiding and breaking in and out of places and she can squeeze herself into tight spaces quite easily as well. This talent of her’s comes in handy on nights when she and Bill get naughty 😏

🦷 Mona does not care for personal hygiene, she likes being a decrepit, stinky girl. However, if there is one form of self care she actually likes it’s brushing her hair because she finds it soothing and she likes her hair in general. Bill is tasked with brushing her hair and has a tendency to smell it while he does.

🦷 Mona has a bit of a hoarding problem as she is an avid collector of many things ranging from knives and human bones/skulls to dolls/stuffed animals and many of her hideouts boasts some impressive collections she has amassed over the years.

🦷 Mona also has an interest in entomology and mycology and boasts some fairly impressive knowledge on the subjects as a result. She’s got some nice bug and mushroom collections as well but she keeps them hidden because Bill keeps trying to eat them.

🦷 Bill loves coffee while Mona is more of a tea gal. Bill prefers iced coffee over hot and Mona prefers hot tea over iced. Also, Mona can take or leave coffee, Bill meanwhile HATES tea.

🦷 Bill loved breakfast foods, eggs & bacon, pancakes, waffles, donuts, you name it, he was also a fan of eggs in general and isn’t too keen on sweets most of the time. Mona is a MEAT girl, any kind of meat will do but human meat/organs is her favorite.

🦷 Mona dislikes guns because she finds them to be an incredibly boring and “impersonal” way of killing someone that doesn’t inspire her much, preferring a more “hands on” approach to murder. Bill meanwhile doesn’t just like guns, he practically worshipped them and was a typical second amendment, NRA type before meeting Mona.

🦷 Mona’s favorite genres of music are Industrial, Alternative Rock, Grunge, Horror Punk, Goth Rock and Dark Cabaret, her favorite artist is either Voltaire or Tom Waits. Bill’s favorite genres are Hard Rock, Thrash Metal, Death Metal, Nu Metal, Groove Metal and Psychedelic, his favorite artist is either Rob Zombie or Disturbed.

🦷 By far, the worst thing Mona has ever done was when she blew up a daycare on Christmas Eve, collected the charred remains of the infants, stitched them back together as macabre flesh dolls and sent them to their parents in gift boxes on Christmas day. Even Bill was kinda shocked when she did this and genuinely didn’t think she could get anymore depraved until she did it… which only made him love her even more in the end.

🦷 Mona’s choice for a final meal would be brown sugar glazed pork chops with colcannon and roasted asparagus, filet mignon with lobster tail, black pudding, a slice of spiced apple cake with french vanilla ice cream and a cup of earl grey. Also if given the choice, Mona would choose to be executed by firing squad. Bill’s final meal would be two pounds of fried chicken with a pound of fried shrimp, scrambled eggs, roasted potatoes, a pound of strawberries and a bottle of fireball whiskey. Bill wouldn’t care how he’s executed, just as long Mona is there to see him off.

[nerdieforpedro]

WIP Wednesday

The last one I did may have been in September. 👀 Been a long time. Haven’t really been writing much fanfic. Stuck on different papers for school. I was tagged by @evolnoomym and she shared ideas so I will too! ❤️ @pr3ttynpiink also tagged me and looks to be cooking up some fun new fics. 🥰

I want to write something for Modern Din and Christmas to go in my series: This is the Neighborhood Din, but it will likely need a chapter between that to make sense. (Every so often I care about making sense). Also more Luke doing Jedi yoga on his lawn and Poe & Finn being boyfriends because I want it all!

I need to write a new chapter of Weddings 101 with Dieter. Kinda left on a cliffhanger and a lot happened in my mind that should be posted 🤣

There’s a little over a month until the DMAMC 2025 challenge is due, haven’t written anything. Actually forgot about it, but fear not! I’ll think of something. 👀 My character is Pero Tovar (I doomed myself by picking him 😭 like the level of difficulty). But maybe I’ll revisit a pairing I’ve done.

Random but working on a Baldur’s Gate 3 fic and bugging @perotovar (Erin beta read for me what I have so far), @megamindsecretlair reads the snippets I send her and @soft-persephone looks at the pics I send her and is honest 🤣🤣🤣). Everyone’s favorite moody (for many a legit reason) and murderous pale elf who’s a vampire Astarion and an OFC. Things that happened between these two: a lot of staring, mocking Gale (everyone’s favorite past time- he makes it easy but also the wizard is really nice insane like everyone else but nice), drying some hair, hugs and some tears. Lots of angst, fluff and comfort. Haven’t decided on smut yet, is likely but I’ll see how it reads.

Didn’t realize that A Safe Place for Us was up to chapter 7 on AO3 and only 5 on Tumblr 👀 My bad. I should be able to post one chapter on here before November ends. The formatting and graphics take me the longest. 🤓

I also have a secret Santa fic things I’m supposed to be working on for a discord group but I also have not started. 👀 Unsure of which direction it should go in. I’ll figure it out, eventually I think.

The first paragraph of chapter five of “A Safe Place for Us”:

Waking up to Dieter takes getting used to for Aisha. It’s not unwelcome, she’s just not used to someone clinging to her like he does. Every morning he stays at her apartment is one where he has his arm and head somewhere on her. Chest, stomach, thigh, back, ass one time because he enjoys scissoring her entrance wider and scooping his spend that drips out of her back in before pumping his fingers to stir his cum within her.

Yeah…chapter five is…a ride so to speak. 👀 Forgot we had a strong start.

I found a WIP that contains Marcus Pike angst:

His romantic relationships and come and gone just like yours but you always had each other. Though, you treated yours as ways to work off the need you felt for your friend. To distract yourself, even when you were with your other partners, you’d think of him during the throws of passion, even when having simple meals and they may chew too loudly. You loathed your behavior toward your partners and your friend, biting your lips to not utter his name while under someone else.

“Marcus…”

Is the only name you want to say but can’t.

Hmm….might be a good holiday one or something. 🤔

That’s the ideas for now. Always a lot and never finished. ✅ Would it be Nerdie if they were? 😎

Have a happy Thanksgiving, holiday, days off of work and stay safe!

NPT: @chaithetics @schnarfer @inept-the-magnificent @yopossum @djarinmuse @604to647 @secretelephanttattoo @magpiepills @maggiemayhemnj @murder-wife @sin-djarin @syd-djarin @morallyinept @westside-rot @tinytinymenace @sunshinehaze1 @soft-girl-musings @goodwithcheese @jolapeno @bluestar22x @clawdee @romanarose @beefrobeefcal @bitchesuntitled @bitchwitch1981

[austinslounge]

For me with Austin and Kaia when a couple goes from being papped all the time together then that abruptly stops, usually means a break up happened.

In the past two years Austin and Kaia have followed a very strict formula. Be papped together doing everything when they are together. Dinner, date night, walking Kaia's dog, vacations, red carpets, etc. They were papped ALL the fucking time. All of July, Kaia called the paps every day.

Same for the holidays. The same formula has happened. Austin and Kaia go to Cabo with her parents. Legit travel with her parents to Cabo. Get papped making out in the pool or golf carts, whatever.

This year, at the height of the break up speculation is the one year they do not spend Christmas together. I think that in itself says enough. Austin was with Ashley Tisdale. Judging from what I've read from others, it seems Kaia was indeed in Cabo with her parents for Christmas. They've been dating 3 years. It's odd to not spend the holidays together at this point. First year, I get spending them apart. Year 3, odd. Especially when they've never had break up speculation, until now.

I do find it very strange as well Cindy trying to get ahead on the somewhat damage control by telling People magazine, before Christmas, it's hard to get her family all together. I interpret that as don't expect pap pics of Austin this year. Presley spent Christmas with his girlfriend. We know Austin was in LA. What I find so interesting is now the Gerber's want a private vacation trip. Which proves they only call the paps when Austin is with them. Which just goes to show how badly this family has used this man to get attention.

I don't know if it's also a coincidence or not, but this year they also cancelled their annual Halloween party. Austin was busy working so he wasn't going to attend. Remember last year when Austin looked so uncomfortable a the party. It was awful. Again, no Austin to use for attention, no party. Which could be a mere coincidence....

While I realize we still have to wait to see what happens for New Years, because pics could still happen in come regard with Austin and Kaia.

My gut says something is different now. I have a feeling they broke up. A lot of signs point that direction. Just my two cents.

No I totally agree with you. 💯

While we really don't know where Austin spent Christmas (Ashley's picture was posted on Christmas eve), I think it's pretty safe to say that he more than likely was not in Cabo on Christmas day, and that something seems a bit off this year.

Like you said, they canceled the Halloween party this year, when last year, we saw not only Austin at that cringe Halloween party of theirs, but also at the Casamigos launch thing at Kaia's House where Milo was wearing a shark costume, and Rande was wearing a baby costume rofl 🤣

And yea, that silly announcement ahead of time from Cindy about how "hard" it is to get the family all together for the holidays and how she doesn't always celebrate Christmas on December 25th was just weird (umm... nobody asked? 🥴).

No Kaustin pap pics either at all since Austin finished filming "Caught Stealing". Not even any pap pics of the family in Cabo.

I can see how if Austin and Kaia have broken up why they would probably want to give their daughter some privacy (this has been her longest relationship after all).

I do think that when we put everything together that has happened this year, it really does look like they have broken up.

But we'll see what happens around New Year's.

PS - **Unpopular Opinion** I agree with you too that they've definitely used Austin for clout for their daughter. In fact, I'm almost kind of wondering if maybe they encouraged her to go after him before the Elvis press tour started so that she would possibly be able to get invited to all of the film festivals and red carpet premieres in order to be seen and rubbing shoulders with people in the acting world in Hollywood. 🤔 I definitely feel like she latched on to him deliberately before other women would get to him during the Elvis press circuit. It all seemed very calculated to me. (Just my personal theory)

[fmajorenthusiast]

What are the Rocky Horror characters' favourite books?

WHOOMST HAS AWAKENED THE CLASSIC LITERATURE NERD IN MEEEE??? FOR SHE'S BEEN AWAKENED!!!! YAYYYY I LOVE THIS TYSM!!!!! (OK I promise that they won't all be classics only some! Also I did my best to make it so that anyone who hasnt read these books can understand- if it didnt work PLEASE let me know and I'll find some way to change it!!)

Frank: But before we let the classic literature nerd in me go wild, we must acknowledge the fact that Frank's favorite read is a nice little series called Fifty Shades of Grey. I have not read these books nor seen the films once but I consider it to be somewhat of an undeniable given that Frank loves it. It's Frankenstein by Mary Shelley and Fifty Shades of Grey! He later dragged Riff Raff and Magenta to see all three movies with him and they just cringed to each other so hard. (No offense if that's your thing then that's your thing!! :))

Brad: Brad legit loves the Hunger Games novels!! He was so invested to see what was going to happen next!! And he also adored the Great Gatsby when he read it in school!!! He'll fully recite a few lines for Janet sometimes because he really likes doing it and she can tell that it makes him happy!! It's so sweet!!

Janet: Janet LOVES Pride and Prejudice and Jane Eyre!!! OK, she gets a little bit scared at certain parts of Jane Eyre (love interest keeps his crazy wife locked in the attic-), but she does love it!!! Also, in Pride and Prejudice she outright squeals from cuteness at certain parts!! To her, that book is everything she dreams of in a romance!! Brad not might have quite such a way with words, but nobody else is Jane Austen, and she knows how much he loves her!!!

Riff Raff: Riff Raff absolutely adores Orlando by Virginia Woolfe!!! He loves the creative style in which the book is written and he'd be lying if he said that he didn't thoroughly enjoy thinking about how Earthlings must have reacted to some certain plot points! (Specifically the one in which the titular character transforms into a woman halfway through and everyone else is like "yeah that tracks she is definitely transfem") He genuinely cried happy tears after he finished it!!! He also loves The Picture of Dorian Gray bc that one speaks to his dramatic, justice-seeking soul! He also full on loves Oscar Wilde's prose!

Magenta: Aaaaaaand some of you may have guessed that this one was coming but I promise that this has been a legit headcanon of mine for a good long time!!! Magenta's favorite book is absolutely Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte!!! She loves how visceral and vivid the writing style of the book is. She was deeply invested in the characters, too!!! She never really understood being hooked on the romantic love of characters until now- and she was hooked. She also really loves Dracula by Bram Stoker!!! She felt that she story was so wonderfully written and the suspense was fantastic!!!

Columbia: Columbia LOVES the Six of Crows duology!!! There were so many moments where she couldn't believe the plot twists that were happening in front of her!!! Also, she's 100% an adult that ADORES Percy Jackson, and honestly, is she wrong? No, she's not wrong bc Percy Jackson slaps!!!

Eddie: Eddie is completely hooked on the "A Song of Ice and Fire" series!!! (Those are the Game of Thrones books if you guys don't know!!!) And he is actively furious at the wait for the Winds of Winter to come out. (Again, if yall don't know- the last two books still aren't out and we're all more than a little bit worried-) One of his favorite activities would be screaming online that it needs to come out!!! Also he holds Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events quite close to his heart!!!

Doctor Scott: Doctor Scott loves Charles Dickens!!!! He'll never be able to decide between A Tale of Two Cities and a Christmas Carol, though!!! He loves the way that those stories remind him of the inherent goodness of people! Both of those leads go through massive redemption arcs, and he adores them!!!

Rocky: Now this lil guy LOVES The Cat in the Hat, Where the Wild Things Are, and In the Night Kitchen- but you must give him a show as you read him these books!!! He's all about the performances!!! Use big arm motions and character voices!!! This boy must be entertained!!!! He will clap so sweetly if you do!!!

The Criminologist: The Criminologist loves the Simarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien!!! He's never seen anything like it before or since, and he's so fascinated by all that it is!!! He also loves the Moonstone by Wilkie Collins!!!!! He finds it to be so charming and the characters to be so hilarious!!! It really was one of the first mystery books and it set off a whole genre for sure!!!

[ashesinthewest]

I have never been more disappointed in Michael's and so thankful for Herrschners than I was two weeks ago. When I started on the 6-day Star blanket, I legit thought I would be playing yarn chicken with the Red Heart yarn. But nope! It was with the Caron One Pound yarn. And when I ran out, I went to Michael's, and then Walmart. NEITHER store had Caron yarn in a solid color. Oh they had solids in Red Heart and house brands. But that was it. The only yarns they had from Caron were the various Caron Cakes.

Since the brick and mortar stores failed me, I wasn't going to shop at their websites. They already failed me, no second chances! Yarnspirations.com was out of stock, unfortunately. At least they had it as an option.

But who comes in clutch? Herrschners! Gods, I love the website. The only reason I didn't start there immediately is because I was hoping the brick and mortar stores in town would have what I needed, especially with JoAnn's closing. The only downside was the wait for shipping.

Once the yarn arrived, I was able to finish the blanket and actually made it a bit bigger than I originally planned. Wolvie decided to test the blanket out while I snapped the photos.

It spans across my queen sized bed nicely. Unfortunately, I'm not inclined to bed decorations like that. Maybe if I have a guest room.

As it is, I wasn't decided on whether I was going to keep it, store it for later sale, or gift it to someone until yesterday. My brother-in-law and mother-in-law were over yesterday for Mother's Day and she suggested that my future sister-in-law would love it. BIL confirmed the blanket would definitely fit her style. So! My Christmas gift for her has been decided. Nice!

My brother wasn't happy to learn that the blanket already had an intended owner yesterday while he was over and saw the completed blanket. Turns out he really loves the look of the Red Heart yarn I was using and was looking to either ask for it or trade doing some house work chores I despise doing for it if I wasn't decided on what to do with blanket yet. The brat gets so many crocheted things from me, he can handle not getting this one.

Annnnd luckily for him, I have two and a half skeins of the Red Heart Tweed yarn left and plans for a different blanket for him that he can get at Christmas too.

The blanket pattern was really easy to follow along with, but DAMN. You really need to count with this one. Betty McKnit suggests checking each row for missed stitches once it's done. No no no no no. You're going to want to count in-between each peak and valley of each star point as you crochet. I had to frog an entire row TWICE because I accidentally skipped a stitch on the previous row.

I don't plan to make this blanket to this size again. Not without being paid for it. I may make kid-sized blankets from this pattern in the future.

But it's done! Nothing like the sensation of a finished blanket.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Sorry if I missed it, but do you have any recs for diverse body types? Like either the hero, heroine, or both who are fat or chubby? Thank you!

Yes!

Historical:

Nine Rules to Break When Romancing a Rake by Sarah MacLean. A classic! Callie is canonically fat, ends up pursuing the nine things she's always wanted to do before committing to spinsterhood, and the local rake ends up getting entangled in her adventures. One of my favorite moments in this book is when she tries to disguise herself as a man by wearing trousers during a fencing moment, and he sees her ass and is like "that is NOT a man".

A Rogue By Any Other Name by Sarah MacLean. It isn't as obvious in this book, but I think it's pretty clear that Penelope is more full-figured, and boy is Bourne about it.

Brazen and the Beast by Sarah MacLean. Hattie is fat, and this is one of the only historicals that actually has a plus-size model on the cover and the stepback. She's gorgeous, yay! (And it's such a great stepback.)

Knockout by Sarah MacLean. Another one where the model actually is a legit plus-size model, and a lot of the book is kind of like... big girl wish fulfillment in a great way, imo? It's very touching in a manner I don't think people will get if they haven't been there. Imogen doesn't have all this "I'm fat" angst, she's confident, but her sore point is being made to feel that she's too much in every way? Like, she's too brash, she's too bold, and her big personality on top of a bigger body just makes her too much. Like she should shrink in some way to balance it out. And Tommy is like, carrying her around, protecting her, adoring her. Ugh, it's a lOT.

The Truth About Cads and Dukes by Elisa Braden. Jane is fat, and she considers herself plain. What she doesn't realize, after she enters into a marriage of convenience with local icy duke Harrison, is that he is like. Physically. OBSESSED. He doesn't know much about her personality lmao, but he is BARELY holding it together whenever she does one of her innocent double entendres. (In like, the scene where he's trying to propose a fix it marriage, she's all "and you wouldn't know what's inside my mind unless you'd been inside ME" and he's like, desperately coughing to keep himself together while she has noooo idea why he's so upset lmao.)

Contemporary:

The Brown Sisters trilogy by Talia Hibbert. All three heroines are plus size. There are other cool aspects of rep Talia addresses as well--Chloe Brown has chronic pain, Dani Brown is bi, Eve Brown is autistic (and so is her hero). These are really fun, really good, really sexy books. I think Act Your Age, Eve Brown may be my favorite, though.

The Princess Trap by Talia Hibbert. This is another Talia book with a fat Black heroine who is totally aware of her own appeal and confident as hell. She ends up in a fake engagement situation with a prince (who is, I should add, in trouble because a tape leaked of him and his previous girlfriend getting up to Certain Things That Some Unjustly Consider Abnormal, and also mentioning his bisexuality) and it all goes from there. He has an oral fixation, btw.

Tastes Like Shakkar by Nisha Sharma. This is recent and so cute! It's a Much Ado About Nothing retelling wherein the hero and heroine, of course, hate each other, but have to work together because she's planning her bestie's wedding and he is the chef (and also best friends with the groom). And someone's trying to sabotage the wedding, so that's also an issue. He ALSO has a particular interest that I really appreciate seeing in books with fat heroines, personally.

A Merry Little Meet Cute by Sierra Simone and Julie Murphy. Christmasy, but works all year round imo. The heroine is a plus sized adult film star with a super popular OF-style account, but she wants to break into mainstream. So she gets this opportunity to fill in for an actress on a Hallmark-style Christmas movie, and jumps in. Except oops, the hero, who's a fallen boy bander, is VERY familiar with her work... Super body positive and hot, love it.

Possession by Adriana Anders. Omg love this book. The heroine is a rising actress, and she's in a totally platonic, PR marriage of convenience with this A-list, "sexiest man alive" type star. Then he gets caught on tape doing Stuff and Things with a woman who looks super similar to her. Obviously, they're not really together, but it looks like cheating, so he rans off to a camp to... be himself. She chases him down, and it's super super hot and emotional and there's consensual kidnapping!

Gothic-y Paranormal-y:

The Thornchapel Series by Sierra Simone has six leads (five of whom have POVs). One of the POV characters is a plus size model who's just acknowledged as like, the hottest person around. TW for a million things, but this heroine does have a strong recovery from a past sexual assault ARC.

There are romance novels with fat heroes, obviously, but they are much fewer and further between, and if I'm super real, I've yet to read one wherein the focus wasn't like "the hero and heroine are both fat and the main thing they talk about is being fat", which is not something I personally like to read. It's not that I don't want to read about two fat people falling in love--I do. But I don't like it when that's like... the main point of the story aside from the romance.

[tuiyla]

i trust your takes more than anyone else’s in the whole glee fandom. what would you say are the best kurtcheltana episodes?

Oh wow Anon that's very flattering considering I've dropped off the face of the Earth and barely interact with tumblr or the Glee fandom anymore, but I appreciate it! Because I've been basically gone for a year and abandoned my rewatch my Glee memory isn't what it used to be but I'll gladly go down memory lane with you.

Previously Unaired Christmas

As soon as I remembered this ep there was no question in my mind that it's the ultimate Kurtcheltana ep. Yes yes it's not even technically canon but I've famously never cared about that. For starters, it has their only trio song, technically a quartet that is admittedly a bit yikes but then also a final song feat Kitty and ND. Since it's "set in 2012" Santana doesn't even officially live with Hummelberry, she just chose to visit them and give them thoughtful and also Santana-esque gifts. I think that's really cute. And yeah, the Mall Santa stuff is a little icky but the three of them are so cute and fun. It's just a low-stakes Kurtcheltana adventure where they're being silly and young and delightful. I love the Pezberry moments, of course, but it also has some of my fav Kurtana shots and just in general they feel like a very cohesive trio. PUC is legit one of the eps that best showcases the chemistry between these three and I can't not love that.

2. Girls (and Boys) On Film

This ep is actually where I abandoned my rewatch and that's weird to me because I was really looking forward to seeing it again. Santana, following the iconic ending to Diva immediately establishes herself as a force to be reckoned with in Bushwick and it's so, so delightful. Her casual "yeah it's a thing I do" to going through everyone's stuff is something only she could pull off. There is some hostility here, of course, as Rachel and Kurt never actually invited Santana to live with them so they're understandably thrown off by Santana not only inserting herself into their flat but also firmly into their lives. Excellent moments for the whole dynamic, best of all being Santana's whole speech starting with "Kurt, sit down" and, of course, the final scene with Pezberry. That scene to me embodies so much of what makes Santana in her current state work as a ch, an agent of chaos who is ultimately trying to be there for her friends. It's an excellent showcase of what she brings to the NYC plot and a simply impeccable Pezberry scene. Really strong establishing ep for what having Santana in New York will be like. Actually, it's also a real shame because it introduces what this trio dynamic will be like and then there are barely any more episodes truly following through on it. Shame.

Honourable mention to the two subsequent eps as I consider this to be an NYC trilogy of Santana being accepted as a full-fledged member of the loft. Feud has her calling Hummelberry her family and Guilty Pleasures the wholesome scene of reconciliation where they really become roommates.

3. Love, Love, Love/Tina in the Sky with Diamonds

Unfortunately, in general we more so have episodes that have good Kurtcheltana moments rather than being Kurtcheltana eps. The Beatles two-parter is a good example, where the few Kurtcheltana bits we have are excellent but unfortunately they're less prominent as a trio and more so have duo moments, mainly Pezberry in the first half and Hummelberry in the second. But there's good stuff here, from Rachel and Santana during the engagement to their cute little promise to each other when Kurt starts working in the diner. As with many things Glee, this cute trio moment is soured in hindsight of the direction s5 ended up taking but nothing can take it away from us, or how Kurt and Santana celebrated with Rachel after that.

These are the only ones I feel like are worth actually ranking but some other honourable mentions:

Lights Out: overall I found Kurt and Rachel encouraging Santana to find her dream to be underwhelmingly executed but who doesn't love At the Ballet and the three mini-mes during the sequence

A Katy or a Gaga: the formation of Pamela Lansbury

Trio: gets a DIShonourable shout out as it should have been a strong Kurtcheltana ep but the Pezberry feud overrode all

Old Dog, New Tricks: honestly barely counts but it's the last of what I could even call an ep with a Kurtcheltana moments. The back half of s5 gives us a crowded NY scene with not NEARLY enough Santana, much less Kurtcheltana - i.e. Opening Night has Kurt call Santana as reinforcement for encouraging Rachel but they don't actually have a moment. Sigh. But 5x19 at least gives us the best hug and Kurt and Santana both supporting Rachel and Kurt being supported in return. It's wholesome and it's the very last trace of our favourite dysfunctional Bushwick family.

Utter disgrace I can't name any season 6 episodes that would fall into this category but special shout out to Kurtcheltana starting us off on Home in 6x02, a moment I treasure very much. Thanks Anon, it was fun to think about all this stuff again! And now, predictably, I have Pezberry feels.

[drjdorr]

So, while I'm doing internet things I meant to do at a later time, here are the pins I got for Christmas.

Now just going to get the same across the board stuff out of the way.

I don't know for certain where my mom got them. They look official VivziePop store but I can't find them on there, probably because, based on them being mostly all being heart shaped, they look limited time for valentine's day. So they might come back? But I also got a Hazbin Hotel blanket too that has enough characters I don't recognize(some of which had a suspicious, one could say familial, resemblance to Alastor) that I suspect it wasn't official merch so they might also be the source of the pins. Last but not least, the bag has the "throw it away don't suffocate" warning thing in French. If you stumble upon it, I'd happily update the post to give a link(preferably legit, most of these places I found seem like resellers)

Since I don't know where she got them, I don't know how much they cost.

They all have a single rubber back.

So onto the actual pins

Figured I'd do them in batches because it's already late and I like them but I don't have that much to say

Moxie and Milly dancing, Angel hugging Fat Nuggets, and Angel dust just chilling in a heart. Out of all of these, Angeldust and Fat Nuggets is the only nonheart pin

Vaggie and Charlie being cute together, Pentious being all smug, and husk being his surly self with a bottle of presumably booze.

And lastly, Vox(my favorite V) and Alastor(tied for my favorite Hazbin Character with Nifty). Fun fact, trying to find the seller I reverse image searched Alastor and several places had the same design but without the heart shaped monocle which is interesting

So that's all the pins I got for Christmas. Funnily, I've waited long enough they are actually more in season now than when I got them

Also, good news, I was worried for nothing about the potential dox pin, I'm just an idiot

MV sport has nothing to do with where I work, so no doxxing! Yay! Also can't find it on the site, notably less yay. So kind share a link, sorry. If you stumble upon it, I'd happily update the post to give a link

Regardless, I saw a bunch of pins at the store where I work, looked through them, I liked the snowflake the best so I got it.

I didn't keep the receipt and again, can't find it on the site, but my bank record shows a charge of 64 cents, and literally nothing I buy is that cheap (not a brag, reality is just expensive) so I assume that's the abnormal purchase I did, aka, the pin.

Single rubber. Though abnormally it's very yellow.

[joemerl]

More serious review of Hot Frosty (spoilery bits under the cut):

I was expecting goofy/So Bad It's Good, and there's certainly some of that, but it's honestly more legit good than I expected.

The sexy snowman that turns into a hawt guy is not even the most bonkers character in this town.

Every woman is horny for Jack. Which...I mean, I get, even if I can't relate.

Lacey Chabert has been in a lot of things but I can't not hear Zatanna from Young Justice.

Anyway, yeah, I ship her with this snowman.

The whole gimmick is "sexy snowman" but it's honestly kinda nice that Kathy is the only one not horny for him.

On a related note, some people say the romance is creepy because he's so childlike (a trope apparently called "Born Sexy Yesterday"), but it only really turns romantic when he's (mostly) matured, and as mentioned, she's the only woman not perving on him.

How does Jack's brain work? Like, he speaks English, he can apparently even read, but doesn't understand idioms or know what a TV remote is. What are the perimeters of his knowledge?

It's honestly hilarious how everyone in town just goes with this. Dr. Dottie sees that his body temperature is low and is just like "yup, snowman came to life, lol!" And then she tells everyone else and they all just accept it! "Yeah, sure, Small Town Christmas Miracle I guess." I love it.

Having him Become a Real Boy at the end was a nice touch.

[fandoomrants]

Tua, season 4, ep 2 thoughts.

Again. Spoilers.

-Okay, so Ben did return them their powers! Expected it when he made them drink but then thought he didn't do it.

-I did not need to see Luther all hairy in only thong....

-Wtf is wrong with Lila?!

-Oh, Klaus didn't drink!

-Hmm, did he accidentally spill the thing over Ben and that's why he has these tails?!

-Also, this time it's not from his stomach, it seems.

-So, are they powers all messed up now?! I think the thing that Ben somehow blasted looks like what the girl from the Sparrows could do, with the hallucinations. Or it could be just, yk, inl because of the tentacles.

-Wait. Is what Lila doing with her eyes another power of the girl that could control birds could do while she had eyes?!

-Oops. Realised I don't remember half of the Sparrow's names :/

-Knew I should have rewatched.

-The rest are right to be angry, tbh.

-So many people calling Ben Benjamin this season 😅😅

-"the Klaus Claire likes" 🥹🥹🥹 I somewhat expected him to be suddenly super aware of being mortal but I still think he's a bit odd. Love him anyway.

-Oh, nooo. I was eatinggg. Why did this thing with Ben had to happen now?! 😔😔😔

-So they were mentioning the Jennifer thing before but now the name doesn't seem to ring a bell. I guess it's a pretty common name, thoo.

-Are they all sick? I'll stop eating, just in case...

-Oh, no, I wasn't expecting Baby Shark....

-Somehow makes sense, thoo. All my friends with children have it play on repeat at home....

-Klaus losing his mind and Victor just going off or whatever he does when everyone started getting sick in the car. I mean, legit. 💀💀💀💀💀💀

-Diego is somehow the "mum friend (brother)", I didn't expect it but wow.

-Oh, yeah, Diego totally thinks Lila is cheating. But didn't get it's Five?

-Five saying good things about Lila ❤️

-Ben being totally done after he's responsible 😬😬

-Klaus calling him "Benerino" again!

-Not Diego wearing that suit again.

-Oh, wow. Ben telling someone else their attitude sucks? The audacity....

-Also this woman's name tag saying sth else but why do I think this is Jennifer??

-Allison and Victor being so awkward...

-Kinda love what Victor said to her.

-I hope that's not Diego's idea for Christmas presents 💀💀

-Oh, okay, Klaus hadn't changed that much...

-Wait, as far as I know the Tarot card for death is actually not a bad omen? It meant new begining or something. (Unless my tarot reading friend was just saying it to make me feel at ease, lol.)

-"SparrowBit" 💀

-Ok, so it's not Jennifer. Unless she lying?

-Are their powers sorta failing them?

-Ummm, what's suddenly going on with all the people?

-I feel like Five's gonna get into some trouble.

-What's actually going on?!?

-Okkk, knew the subway can't be trusted. (Actually knew that one for years now)

-Lila and Diego fighting while being in the middle of getting shot at. 😅 They really are a family.

-Wow. That thing Diego did was so cool!

-He kinda shot lots of people but...

-Yay, Lila's laser eyes worked!

-Oh, ok, so this is Jennifer. (Or is it?)

-Yeah, ok, soo I was right about Rosie.

-What?!? No. No. Just nooo!!!!! Klaussss, noooooooooooo!!!!!!

-I hope how's the time they show that him being immortal was because God kicked him out, not because of his powers, or I swear-

-Ew, that thing Ben did was as.... Both gross and cool.

-They just abandoned the rest? Doesn't matter, Klaus is dying!

-Can't Allison rumour these people?

-Good.

-Not that song again....

-Ok, good. That's how they'll bring Klaus's powers back. More important is, he's not gonna die.

-What was this hand touching??

-Ughhh. Gene and Jean.

[bumblebeerror]

Good god dude, the 'wait that's real?' question is SO legit. I had a several year long moment where I was like you're fucking kidding, people actually feel this way? They lose their composure so much that they forget their boundaries and are suddenly blind to red flags? .....

But personally that was me seeing everyone around me having a super fucked up idea of what care should look like. I'm still aro as fuck but I know what love SHOULD look like now, I just don't house that in my me.

RIGHT LIKE WDYM YOU STILL WANNA SEE THEM RIGHT AFTER TELLING ME YOURE MAD AT THEM

I can confirm it was JUST as surreal having parents who modeled a heathy relationship growing up honestly. My mum and dad understood each other and worked together and I think my dad yelled maybe four times my entire life with him and each time it was terrifying because I never heard that before kinda pretty good relationship y’know?

Tho. Admittedly my dad wasn’t very touchy-feely and I think the only time he really got flustered was when he was trying to make his valentine’s and birthday and Christmas presents to my mom *perfect*. [to his credit he knew what she liked so well that he accidentally picked out the exact same necklace for her twice, and she still has both] so I grew up with my dad turning to me in the car before Valentine’s Day and asking if what he wrote on the card for mom’s flowers was too hokey <3

[mysterycharacterflowers]

Round 5; A bouquet with love-lies-bleeding, forget-me-nots and sunflowers Vs Plastic/Fake strawberry flowers

First, let's talk about the bouquet with love-lies-bleeding, forget-me-nots and sunflowers

Meaning and why these flowers were chosen: Sunflowers for justice and truth, love-lies-bleeding because he lost the only person who cared about him two months before he could truly work alongside him as a partner, and forget-me-nots because he's a living reminder of that person in every way while also very distinctly himself. Description: He's your uncle. Don't have an uncle? You do now. He smiles and flirts a little and jokes about the silliest things even if there's a new corpse on the floor, and he keeps his hand close to his chest, and you'll never catch the motive behind the joke until it's time for him to reveal the truth and prove his every accusation. He's capable and experienced and a living reminder of the man who haunts the narrative, and he won't save you, because if he could, there would be no need for a reminder of a living man. He'll show you how to save yourself.

Check his post here

Now, let's talk about the Plastic/Fake Strawberry Flowers

Why this flower was chosen: Because he is very germaphobic and also phobic of the things that are in flowers and thus hates nature because it’s dirty (his friends even said that he would be would be a plastic flower if he were one) and strawberry because that’s the smell of the shampoo his wife used and that he can still smell on the pillow she slept on that he keeps (in a plastic case) and hugs when he’s sad Description: He’s a detective. His wife was murdered and for three years after that he didn’t leave the house because his phobias that he had before got exponentially worse. He slowly did start coming out of his house and getting better trying to figure out why his wife was murdered while solving other crimes. He has 312 phobias with the top being in order: Germs, needles, dentists, milk, death, snakes, lightning, mushrooms, heights, crowds, elevators. He has impeccable memory, doesn’t like people and will 100% put his phobias and needs over manners. He can clean his house in his sleep, literally. At the end of the day he is a very nice friend but annoys the crap outa his friends and often doesn’t realise that they even care for him as much as they do/ doesn’t realise they consider him a friend. He always says “here’s the thing” before saying he can’t do something very particular. He also says “Unless I’m wrong, which you know, I’m not”. He always has his assistant carry wipes around and wipes his hands every time he shakes someone’s hand. He is very tight (as in with money) which is very relatable for me and probably other people and its hilarious when he hasn’t paid his assistant because he doesn’t have money (while still buying copious amounts of cleaning supplies) and because he’s so non confrontational he doesn’t want to ask for a raise even tho it’s a totally legit ask (which is also hilarious in and of itself) he ends up just avoiding the subject in any way possible. He once was forced to decorate for Christmas (which he doesn’t do since his wife died) and he used not a fake tree but a paper cut out of a tree. He doesn’t at all know what would insult someone and rarely knows how to make someone feel better (often failing miserably but occasionally actually helping and being super wholesome). He hates/is scared of nakedness (and doesn’t even “look” when he wees) and there was a whole thing where he had to investigate a nudist and was just finding every possible way to find him guilty and it was hilarious (he was in the end more accepting of it but still freaked out) He also wears the same clothes every day and buys shirts checked by a specific checker in a factory that he actually sent a fan letter to (and helped prove her son not guilty). Anyway he is very relatable for just introverted people or awkward people in general because he expresses the way we feel and does things we wish we could do or want to do and says thing we just think in the most hilarious ways, and if that doesn’t make any sense then he just acts and says things that we all kinda do on the inside. Apart from just mostly normal people, he is relatable for the people who share his mental conditions like my dad who is a germaphobe and even tho people still don’t understand germaphobia really, he knows that he gets it and he relates to him a lot. And he has a lot of other things like anxiety, and little things like not being able to deal with change and other stuff that just make him super relatable to neurodevergent people like me. When people first look at people with mental problems they say they are weak that so little sets them off but in reality, they are dealing with so so much that you can’t see and you don’t need to deal with and they- and he is (are) so incredibly strong. I love him so much and I would say more but I don’t want to reveal who he is.

Check his post here

[luucypevensie]

Cute character questions + Ruby Hamada?

Thank you sm for asking about my fave skater chick! Tagging @dancingsunflowers-ocs, @daughter-of-melpomene, and @ginger-grimm because they are Ruby’s biggest fans!

The Basics

Name: Ruby Hamada

Age: 15 at the start of glee s1

Zodiac Sign: aquarius

One Good Trait: she is so comfortable with her own individuality; she knows who she is, and isn’t afraid to own it

One Bad Trait: ruby tends to be a bit aloof; it plays into her cool-as-a-cucumber attitude, and puts people off her

Habits

One Bad Habit: ruby is a nail biter; she only does it when she’s nervous about something

One Good Habit: she likes to volunteer a lot because she’s a big fan of making a difference

One Habit They Can’t Break: ruby is TERRIBLE at asking for help (drew has tried to help her break it, and gave up after the first try)

One They’ve Broken: she used to pick her scabs all the time, but yasmin told her how disgusting that was and ruby worked on curbing that habit

What They’re Afraid Of: honestly, ruby’s afraid that she’ll never find someone who isn’t afraid to show that they love her

Family

Their Parents’ Names: Norman and Caroline Hamada

Their Siblings’ Names: Drew Hamada (twin brother)

Favorite Childhood Memory: learning to play their respective instruments with her brother (they led some pretty wild jam sessions)

Favorite Childhood Toy: a toy drum set she received for christmas at the age of 3

Embarrassing Story: she was attempting to do some tricks on her skateboard from the safety of her driveway when a random pretty girl rode her bike past. the girl didn’t notice, but ruby stopped to stare which caused her to tumble of her board and receive some pretty nasty scrapes on her knees, elbow, and the palms of her hands

Favorite Family Member: drew (they’re twins, of course he’s the favorite)

A Story About That Family Member: when santana and ruby first started going out, drew read santana the riot act. it was the first time in a while that santana was legit scared of someone because he was terrifying when saying she was done for if she hurt his sister in anyway

What They Prefer

coffee or tea

showering in the day or night

taking baths or taking showers

tv or movies

writing or reading

platonic or romantic love

iced tea or lemonade

ice cream or smoothies

cupcakes or cake

beach or mountains

Favorites

Song: cherry bomb by the runaways

Band: bikini kill

Outfit: overgrown pattered men’s shirt with ripped skinny jeans and vans

Place: toyoko, japan

Memory: the first performance cherry bomb ever did together

Person(s): Yasmin Ahmad, Artie Abrams, and Drew Hamada

Movie: whip it

Show: brooklyn 99