#but no the natural progression is for them to date left and right while loving each other

[fieryncbles]

If you saw me add Castle muses here... no you didn't 😅

[arthenaa]

my love mine all mine— mizu x f! reader

synopsis: marriage is nigh for someone your age and with society's expectations of you, how long will you have to keep waiting for him?

content: 18+ nsfw, mdni, angst w comfort, fluff, she/her pronouns for reader, he/she pronouns for mizu, patriarchal views on women, arranged marriage, jealousy, use of sex toys, idiots in love

a/n: part 2 of nocturne (interlude)!! this is for that anon who was on their finals week (ur req got deleted i h8 tumblr) and to those who requested for a part 2 !!! a reward for your hard work

Your relationship with Mizu was ... interesting.

After what happened that day, your relationship progressed into a deeper sense of connection. He was attracted to you as much as you were attracted to him. A fact that made your fingers tingle with anticipation every time he came down to your village under the guise of getting more medicine.

Your father had no complaints as business is business and provided him with what he needed, although you could see the occassional side eyes that your father gives him every time he stays longer than he was supposed to be. It was a comical sight indeed.

Mizu helped you out as much as he could—whether it be mundane house chores or taxing ones that require hard labor or a change of locations, he was down to accompany you in any way.

While yes, his efforts of providing you aid sent a surge of butterflies down your stomach, what ultimately led you to hammering a nail in the coffin was the subtle touches that he gave you.

You knew he knew and he knew that he was being smug about it. While it didn't show on his face, his eyes told it all. Whether it be passing by and gently placing a hand on the small of your back to excuse himself out of your way as if there wasn't a 2-meter space to your right or the brushing of fingers when he lent you something or if he's being bold enough, especially when your father's not looking, outright pretending that there was a fabric stuck on your hairpin and so he leans in close to you only to place a kiss on your cheek—he always has to have some sort of skinship with you during the day. It often left you struggling for words or having a flushed face.

"Dear," Your father furrows his eyebrows as he eyes your flushed cheeks. You tense in his gaze as he glances at Mizu who appears calm as he takes a sip of his drink. The blue-eyed samurai had done it again—saw an opening and took it like he was meant for it. He fooled you into thinking that your hair was out of place and offered to fix it. Your father had stepped out to get the food and you had hoped that he stayed somehow so that you wouldn't have to deal with all this bullcrap. Mizu took the chance to grab your chin and place a kiss on your lips. Your father came back shortly and you haven't relaxed since. "You don't look alright. Do you want me to—?"

"I-It's fine, Dad!" You intercept, hands raised as you shake no. "The soup was just... hot."

You glance at Mizu who looks at you from the side of his eye. He smirks over his cup.

It was safe to say that Mizu was also mischievous by nature. Despite his usual calm and cool demeanor, you didn't expect the man before you to be quite playful when it came to just between the two of you.

You did all these things, said all those things, looked at each other with things unspoken of and you're quite sure that your relationship was susceptible to the one thing you're quite sure would lead to.

Marriage.

A want for some, a necessity for many. You'd think that in your years of living in this town that you'd find a partner suitable for marriage and you did! Just a little bit later than others.

You had expected that... Mizu would propose. After all, what comes after dating but marriage? Your father and mother did that, your aunts, uncles, cousins, hell, even your friends already got married albeit some of them out of their own will.

You dreamed of having a true love marriage. One that you could be yourself and never have to be ashamed of loving someone despite their stature in life. One that you could coexist with and that could never demean your existence as a woman. You knew those things were far fetched from reality but everyone wishes to dream right?

You had tried discreetly asking about it, curious as to why he barely mentions anything but he only casts you an unreadable look on his face then a soft smile.

He kissed the back of your hand with a gentle touch, softness mirroring that of a snowflake's descent.

"... I can't," He says. You're not sure as to why he sounded in pain, like something was troubling him but you knew better than to pry. "Not right now."

So you let it go.

It was times like this that you felt the other half of the relationship. Like there was still a barrier you couldn't decipher between you. Why he often looks secretive with your father at times or why he falls silent at the most random of moments. There was something you didn't know and it often aches you that you couldn't be able to understand him unless you knew the inner workings of his mind.

The first instance that brought up the onslaught of problems that would soon arise was the arrival of a proposal from the south. It came in the form of a letter, writings neatly imprinted on fine parchment—rolled with the delicacy that of a noble.

You could see your father's nervous glance as the messenger read what was sent to him. You could hear bits and pieces of the arrangement, hands wringing each other in anxiety as your eyes trained on your father's back. Mizu had not arrived that day and normally, you would fret over such things but your father casts a glance at you over his shoulder and suddenly everything seems to have changed its course.

"Father," You pant as you gather the ends of your kimono, trying to match the pace of your patriarch as he travels all over the house. He seems to not be at rest from the talk with the messenger—a perpetual stone-cold look plastered on his face. "Father!"

He enters the part of your house you haven't gone to in ages. Not because you despised it but because you were afraid that the spirit that once dwelled in its abode would arise and look at you with those same eyes that once held all the love and memories when you were but a wee girl. You hesitate at the entrance but decide to follow him through.

"Not right now, Y/N," He mumbles, agitated as he crouches over a chest and begins digging through the array of clothes. Your eyebrows furrow.

"What—What did he say?" You stammer as you stand to his left, eyes watching his every move as he frantically rummages through the fabrics. "Father, I have—I need to know."

Your father pauses, defeatedly slumping against the chest as his fingers tap against the wooden surface in thought. Silence ensues between the two of you and suddenly he turns to you with a sympathetic look on his face. Your blood runs cold.

"Lord Shimizu—" He pauses, catching himself stammering as he looked into those eyes that were fruition of shared dreams and a love he hasn't forgotten in ages. "He asked for your hand in marriage."

You stare at him with a shaky gaze, breath going in and out as you tried to process his response.

"Then-Then tell him no," Your eyebrows furrow. Your father falls silent at your words. "Tell him like you've always told the others."

"I can't, Y/N," He whispers, tone shifting into despair. Your shoulders are low as he lowers his head in shame.

"What do you mean you can't?"

"I can't," He emphasizes his words once more, eyes darting up to meet yours. "I have always tried to protect you but I can't this time."

Your face falls in desperation as you kneel down with him. You grab his hands in an attempt to convince him once more.

"Father, please, I can't—I don't even know him!" You plead as your grip on his callous fingers tightens. He looks at you with sadness. "Please Father, I'll do anything, just don't—"

"Y/N," He cuts you off with a stern voice. You fall silent as you wait for his response. "This man is from Kyoto. While the men here fear my stature as a medic, this man has access to professionals far greater than me. He doesn't regard me as someone important and if I dare raise my voice, we might as well be dead."

Your figure tenses at his words. He grabs your arms in an attempt to comfort you. In a last attempt to get him to decline the offer, you say the thoughts that have been at the forefront of your mind.

"I'm in love with Mizu," Your voice comes out in a whisper, eyes wide and tears welling up. He tenses at your confession, eyebrows furrowing at the implications.

"You—"

"Father, I love him." Your voice comes out in a desperate attempt to get him to see you. Your hands raise to touch his arm but he suddenly raises to his feet, taking a few steps back. Your heart speeds up at his reaction.

"Is that why he—?" Your father whispers out in thought. You're not sure if he was angry or disappointed, but you're quite sure that this was a bad thing. His face contorts into a look of anger as he continues to look at you with a hardened gaze. "When was this?"

"You told me you wanted me to have a true love marriage, Father—This is it!" You look up at him with a defiance so strong that it almost gives your father a whiplash of how similar it looked. He falters in his stance but remains rooted to his cause.

"I know but not to—!" He catches himself at the end of his sentence. Your eyebrows furrow in confusion. He runs a hand through his face before sighing. "Not like this. Not to him. Not Mizu, Y/N."

Your eyebrows furrow in anger at his words. "You can't dictate what I feel for him."

There's a moment of silence as your father casts you an unreadable look on his face. You thought that your father might approve of Mizu. They after all started at the same steps and eventually grew to the path they were destined for, albeit in different fields. You're not quite sure as to what led to this defiance against your choice for marriage but it already has you intruiged.

"The messenger talks of praises of Lord Shimizu," Your father diverts the conversation. "I also hear that he is a general and part of the Emperor's Kingsguard. He is of noble stature and earned his keep. He is a man fitting of your deserving."

You fall silent at his words before finally rising to your height and dusting off your kimono. You glance at the chest, eyeing the white fabric that pops out of an array of multicolored ones. You turn back to your father.

"You raised me to not be a hypocrite," Your voice is stone cold. Your father flinches at the tone. "I expected you to not be one as well."

With that you left.

The days were grueling.

Presents after presents were sent to your doorstep and while you wish that you could throw them all away, your father accepted them and kept them in the storage, still neatly wrapped for you to open.

Mizu had also arrived less and less over the past couple of days. He usually stays for more than an hour but now he leaves within the 30-minute mark. You felt like your time had been severed into bits and pieces after your fight with your father. You saw them talking, hushed in the receiving area. You expected your father to berate him for influencing his own daughter but their relationship remained civil. In fact, after his talk with your father was what prompted fewer visits and only coming for business.

He also became distant. Little to no skinship—sometimes even none at all. He talks to you in that cold tone of his and even grunts in annoyance when you try to bother him into coming with you to window shop in town.

You thought they were being unfair. That they could freely do things like this beyond your knowledge. Watch you crumble into a pit of despair at the concept of what you believed was the essence of true love. How naïve were you.

The final straw came when Mizu stayed a little bit longer than usual. He was swift with his purchase but remained seated at the tree located just outside your humble abode.

You approached him with soft steps, eyes trained on his head devoid of his kasa and the usual orange tinted glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. He looked handsome.

"Why are you like this?" Your voice cuts through the silence, direct and swift as a breeze passes through you. You see the familiar curl on his forehead, swishing back and forth before settling down.

Mizu does not reply for a few seconds before finally responding. "Like what?"

Your breath shakes at his nonchalance. "Like everything's back from the start."

Mizu pauses before turning his head to look at you standing behind him. There's a long duration of silence between you, eyes only locked with each other as the breeze fills in the void.

"Y/N," Your name escapes his lips like a prayer. You will yourself not to fold. "I didn't mean to—"

"Didn't mean to what?"

He rises up from his seat on the ground, grabbing his Kasa in the process. He examines the item, eyeing the material woven intricately to form its shape. You could tell that there were a lot of things in his mind. You could only wait until he decided to break down the walls he built up so high.

"I didn't mean it to be this way." He finally looks at you in the eye, those beautiful shades of blue hidden by a tint of orange. He pauses himself before a change of expression is plastered on his face. "I think it's best if we stop here."

Your breath hitches. "What?"

"I said what I said," He mutters in that neutral tone of his, devoid of emotion. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. "I... I am on a journey and I have wishes to accomplish. I operate on circumstances that prove to be unlawful. It's best that you don't associate yourself with me. I was too distracted to begin with."

Distracted? Is that what he thought all of this was about? Your hands shake in anger as your eyes darted any sort of giveaway that he might just be joking with you. The world was pinning its blame on your shoulders and now you have to receive the consequences of its actions.

You purse your lips, stopping yourself from bawling then and there. You can't give him the satisfaction of seeing yourself in a mess. You refuse.

You turn around without responding, making hasty steps towards your home before halting once more. You turn to see him putting on his Kasa, eyes in a daze. Upon feeling your stare at him, he turns back towards you. His gaze falters.

"I'm sorry." He says.

You could never will out the words you should've said.

Lord Shimizu came on the 3rd day of the week. He wasn't what you expected him to be.

Naturally, nobles of that standing would appear to be egocentric maniacs who dabbled and flaunted their wealth in various entertainment establishments. They act crass and speak crass as if their authority gives them the pass to be an asshole to everybody.

You thought to yourself, this man could have anybody that he wanted. He was a general, a skilled warrior, and a candidate for marriage to Japan's array of elegant and noble women. Why would he pick a humble medic's daughter all the way from Takayama?

Well, the answer finally came to you in flesh instead.

"L-Lord Shimizu!" Your father stammers over his words as a young man, your age enters the establishment. You take a step back towards the panel of the receiving area, slightly shielding yourself from the onslaught of 3-4 men entering the place. "I didn't expect you to be here."

The man does not respond yet, his eyes wander the interior of the establishment before finally settling on you. You flinch back at the intensity of his stare. Your father notices his attention on you before clearing his throat.

"Y/N?" He calls over, eyes meeting with yours as he beckons you over. You grumble under your breath before making hesitant steps to your father's side. "Ah yes, this is Y/N Gojo. My daughter. Y/N, this is Lord Shimizu Kaito."

Your eyes peer up at him underneath your lashes, trying to take a peek at his face. Shimizu flashes you a soft smile before bowing in greeting.

"Apologies for not having been able to meet before. The Emperor had requested me to attend to several cases in various cities. I hope that you and Y/N can forgive my tardy appearance." His voice is proper and elegant but you could only scoff at his words. Apparently, it was loud enough for him, your father, and the two other guards stationed behind him to hear. Your father elbows your waist.

"Apologies for my daughter," He sheepishly smiles. "She seems to have a... cold."

He eyes you with a strict look on his face which you turn to look away at. Just as you wished for all of this to be over, a wave of a hand catches your attention. You turn to look at Shimizu who softly smiles at you once more.

"I know this proposal is sudden but I hope you can give me a chance." He says, voice and tone genuine. You hesitantly purse your lips at his words. "I'll be staying around this time. I hope I can get to know you."

Lord Shimizu stayed true to his word. The past few days were nothing but him trying to get to know you as an individual. He was nice, accommodating, and even dare say, a proper friend you could talk to.

He helped you out in chores, got you gifts, had tea with you, learned your ways, and walked with you in town. If you were the person you were before, you could've deemed this man the perfect match for you.

While you appreciated his eagerness in wanting to get to know you, you also can't help but be reminded of a certain blue-eyed boy every time he did something remotely similar. He talks of his travels, his blade, his peers, his interests, and you're brought back to the time Mizu let you hold his blade in your palms, brought you trinkets from his previous adventure, talked to you about his annoying apprentice, or that he prefers his soba to have a little bit more soup in ratio to his noodles.

Everything remind you of him.

Mizu had not visited in a while. You tried asking about him to your father if he ever came to get medicine but your father denies every question.

Sometimes you catch glimpses of a familiar Kasa roaming the town streets but is only mistaken by a wandering traveler. You're not too sure how long it would take for you to lose your wits about everything.

Sensing the troubling thoughts that plagued your mind, Shimizu offered for you both to take a stroll in town at night and shop for trinkets that you might find interesting to place in your room. He tried his best to keep you entertained, asking about your interests, making you laugh, all that stuff.

The question that prompted you at the start of his arrival began to urge you to put forth a topic for conversation. You wait for Shimizu to finish his words before finally dropping the question.

"Why me?" You ask, eyes gazing into his as he halts at the question. He blinks a couple of times, not able to process the question.

"What?"

"Why me, my lord?" You repeat, hands clutching your satchel. "I am but a mere servant's daughter. You could have anyone."

He licks his lips eyebrows furrowing. "But you are someone."

You raise your eyebrows, urging for him to continue. The man takes a breath, looking around before finally settling his eyes on you.

"I..." He starts off, words trailing as he gazes into your eyes. He continues. "I came here before. As a child."

Your eyes widen at the revelation.

"People talk of a man named Gojo-sensei who was able to remedy almost all illnesses. I was sickly and my condition was worsening." He responds. The city lanterns glow beautifully behind his figure, laughter of children, men, and women alike provides solace in the void of silence between you. "I remember coming in there and seeing you. Seeing your father then..."

He trailed off like he was remembering something painful.

"I remember a lady," His face softens at the thought. Your eyebrows furrow. "While your father did the aiding, this woman had brought me comfort. I was never really coddled and treated with such gentleness back home. I was an only child—a firstborn son. Being soft and dependent was out of the vocabulary."

You fall silent at his words as he looks down at his hands.

"She... she stayed by my side. Fed me, clothed me, made sure I was okay." He looked up at you. "I saw you sometimes, clinging to the ends of her kimono."

A chilling realization surges through your veins. Your silence prompts him to continue.

"I heard the news that she passed away years ago. I wasn't able to come due to my duties but I am indebted to her." He says. "Then, when I visited a month ago. I saw you—a spitting image."

Your breath shakes at the words. "You proposed to me because I looked like my mother?"

Shimizu looks down in shame, hands wringing in nervousness. "I thought that if I married you, I'd be able to receive that same love again."

You let out a breath of disbelief. While the topic of your mother wasn't something you detested talking about, her memory still was something you were quite hesitant to approach. You remember her sickly figure, her weak smile, the day your father broke. It was as if you threaded lightly along the edges of her carved path, wanting to preserve what was left of her image.

You take a step back, eyes looking at him in disbelief. Shimizu falters in his stance.

"I'm sorry, this isn't going to work." You softly mutter, shaking your head. Just as you take another step back, Shimizu panics and tries to grab your hand.

"Y/N, let me explain I—"

A swift change of air alerts you of a new presence and suddenly you feel deja vu. You turn your head to meet the familiar stance of a man you didn't expect to see again.

"I believe she said no." Mizu's voice is authoritative and deep, hand encasing Shimizu's wrist. The man furrows his eyebrows at Mizu who squints back a glare.

"Who are you?! Your jurisdiction?" Shimizu demands. He tries to pull his wrist away only to be met by a steel force. Mizu scoffs.

"I won't let you go until you promise to stay 10 meters away from her." Mizu threatens. Shimizu sweat drops, eyes glancing down at the hand gripping his wrist to the eyes shielded by tinted glasses. Your eyes dart back and forth between the two, afraid that a fight might brawl out and you're not in the mood to see blood spilled.

Shimizu was also a general and if word comes out that one of the Emperor's trusted military aides got injured by someone lower of his stature, your father will definitely pay for the consequences. You rush towards them and grab Mizu's hand to break them apart.

"Let him go," You say. Mizu turns to you with furrowed eyebrows. Your eyes soften, and you nod softly in reassurance. "Let him go, its okay.

Mizu hesitantly lets the man go and Shimizu stumbles back, holding his wrist. Mizu turns to you in concern, hand grabbing your arm as he examines you. "Are you alright?"

You nod, flustered by his attention. "I'm fine."

Feeling Shimizu's stare on you, you look back at the man to see hurt and a realization spread across his face. Your gaze falters.

He clears his throat and fixes his stance. "Apologies, Y/N. It seems that I have miscalculated my approaches. Forgive me for my behavior."

"It's alright, my lord," You respond. Mizu stands menacingly beside you, eyes trained on his figure. Shimizu glances at him and then at you. He smiles.

"It was nice being your friend," He says. He bows as respect. You curtsy back, albeit shaky. "I'll leave as requested. I wish you luck."

He leaves without turning back. You watch as he gets lost in the crowd, the breeze gently swinging your clothes back and forth. The lanterns dazzle the streets—performing a pretense of joy. You take a breath before finally facing the last of your problems.

Mizu stands there, eyes already looking at you with an unreadable look on his face. Your eyes soften.

"What are you doing here?" You mumble, lacking the energy to even be angry. Mizu shifts in his stance.

"I came back." He answers vaguely.

"For what?"

There a pause of silence before he moves to remove his Kasa. You can see his face clearly now, albeit those beautiful eyes of his still covered by his glasses.

"For you." He says. He gulps as if nervous and your eyes widen at his confession.

"But I thought you said—"

"I was a coward," He says. He heaves a breath. "I have loved before and shown them everything and yet I have ruined them. I was afraid that I might—that I might ruin you with what I am."

You fall silent at his words. You were confused, you had already seen what others claim to be the worst of him—in fact, that was what you loved most about his features. Eyes that seem to hold the waters—a depiction of nature. Just as he is about to continue, cheers erupt from the central town, you flinch as the others begin to gather to watch the amusement happening. Mizu, sensing your uneasiness, pulls you towards a nearby alley—dark and hidden from the public eye. He places you against the wall, eyes watching for passersby that might lurk in while your eyes are trained on his face.

You watch with admiration as his eyebrows furrow in their usual curl, those eyes that squint into a glare, chapped lips, and the glasses that begin to slowly fall down the bridge of his nose. Unable to resist the urge, you give in.

"Coast is—"

Mizu's eyes widen at the feeling of your lips against his. You cup his cheeks, pulling him down as you encase your arms over his neck. Mizu wastes no time in reciprocating the kiss. He kisses back with the same fervor, hand dropping his Kasa in favor of encasing your waist as he pulls you towards his figure. You whine as you feel his tongue intertwine with yours.

After a few pecks and kisses, you both finally pull away. There's a hushed silence of panting as Mizu places his forehead against yours.

"I am not being truthful," Mizu whispers, breath hitting your lips. "But I want to try. With you."

You smile, hands cupping his cheeks as you rub your thumbs across the surface of his skin.

"I want you as you are," You reassure him. "No matter the flaw, no matter what you tell me. I'll be here with you."

Mizu lowers his head and drops it to burrow against your neck. He hugs you close as bells and instruments begin playing. He pulls back softly before facing you with vulnerability.

"I..." He starts off. "I am not what you think I am."

You tilt your head in confusion as you encase his hands in yours. Your thumbs run over the scar that you've bandaged from before.

"I'm not a... a man." Mizu finally reveals. You pause, eyes blinking as you watch his reaction for any sort of context. Mizu purses his lips before pulling his glasses away, tucking in the side of his clothing before reaching up to pull at his top knot. You watch as his hair—no, her hair flows to her shoulders and then suddenly everything makes sense.

Mizu's breath shakes at your silence. "I-I cannot give you what you want—"

She falls silent as you lean forward to take notice of her features. The flush that adorns her cheeks and the eyes that entranced you from the start. A smile bursts from your lips.

"You're just as I dreamed of," You whisper in awe. Your arms make their way to wrap around her neck as you press yourself close to her. Mizu's face flushes at your words.

Your eyes trace the edges of her features, face contorted in a soft expression. There's a moment of silence before you finally continue. "My father wanted me to have a true love marriage. All my life, the idea of falling in love has always been my dream as a child."

Mizu blinks softly at your words, listening to your every thought.

"And now that I have it, I can understand why my father wanted me to do so," You smile, leaning your forehead against hers. "Marry me, Mizu. I just want to be yours."

The blue-eyed girl erupts into a smile, leaning forward and capturing your lips in hers. You reciprocate with the same intensity, fingers burying in her raven locks. Mizu then pulls away.

"I'll always say yes to you."

"Do we really have to do this?"

Mizu eyes your figure seated on the tatami, eyes peering up at her as she stands in front of you. You giggle at her hesitance.

"Of course!" You grin. "Consummation between man and wife is a must tradition after marriage—well in our case, wife and wife."

Mizu rolls her eyes as she sits down in front of you. She props her knee up and places her arm on top of it. She grabs the cup of tea perched on the small table beside her and takes a sip. "Consummation is done with the idea of children, love. I'm sure you're well aware of that."

You pout before an idea arises in your mind. You lean forward, going on your knees as you crawl towards her. Mizu pauses mid-sip as she watches you with careful eyes. You grab her cup, placing it down on the table as she continues to watch your every move. You settle on her lap, the slit of your kimono revealing your thighs. Mizu's breath shakes.

You take her glasses off and place them on the table before finally focusing on her, arms propped on her shoulders. You feel her hands cup your hips as you stare down at her with a smile.

"What?" You taunt. "You don't wanna fuck me?"

Mizu pauses, eyes widening before she lets out a groan and lowers her head to your clavicle. You giggle as she takes a few moments to calm herself down. Finally, pulling away to face you, Mizu looks at you with her blue eyes clouded with lust.

"You are one dangerous lady, know that?" Mizu leans forward. You grin as you rub your nose against hers.

"Mhm," You say. "My wife told me so."

"Ah fuck! Fuck!" You whimper as you grab the sheets behind you, trying to find some sort of stability from the onslaught of ministrations Mizu's giving you. "W-Wait—Mizu-Wai—Ngh!"

You're afraid that the toy one of your close friends gave you as a congratulations gift to your marriage would be too crass for your night with Mizu. You only brought it to tease her after all. You just didn't expect how much she'd be turned on by it.

"Where are you going?" Mizu's voice is deep and taunting as she watches you claw at the sheets, trying to get away from the intense pleasure. She grabs your waist and pulls you back down towards her, folding your legs to your chest. "You wanted this, why are you backing out, hm? You wanted to consummate so here we are."

She watches as the thick girth and length of her strap pushes in and out—coated with your essence. The noises from it are slick and noisy, causing you to flush in embarrassment. God fucking damn.

"So fucking pretty, aren't ya?" Mizu chuckles as she pushes her hips. She lets out a moan, feeling the other end of the dildo pushing deep with her. You whimper as Mizu presses deep, the tip of her cock bumping against that spot of yours. "So so pretty for me, aren't you momma?"

You shiver at the nickname, hands coming down to grab Mizu's lean arms—its muscle flexing as she speeds up her thrusts, making sure that it's the right spot.

"You've been adamant about this all morning. Especially, after the wedding." Mizu growls, slamming her hips against yours. "You want my kids that bad?"

You're too lost in the pleasure, moans, and garbles of her name only coming out of your mouth. Mizu smiles, hair falling down her shoulders and framing her face as she props herself up on top of you.

"If you want it so bad, I'll give it to you," Mizu leans down to bury her face on your neck, sucking a few marks as she begins to speed up her thrusts.

"Oh! Oh!" You whine as the spot inside of you becomes more sensitive with each bump. Mizu pays no mind to your sounds, reveling in the way your nails rake through her back. She smirks against your skin, licking down until she encases your nipple within her mouth. You moan at the feeling, hands reach up to bury itself in her raven locks.

"I'm close! I-I—please!" You plead as her constant torture of your cunt begins to teeter at the edge. Mizu pants heavily as she places a soft kiss behind your ear.

"I am too." Her breath shakes as her hips falter. It doesn't take long before you climax, body arching and shivering from the intensity of the pleasure. Tears begin streaming down your face as you twitch with each thrust she gives you. She smiles placing a soft kiss on your lips. "Good girl."

Mizu follows shortly behind, coming in grunts and low moans before slumping down against you. There's a moment of reprieve before Mizu props herself up once more to take a look at your afterglow.

You smile up at her, hand coming up to brush her hair over her ear. Mizu leans against your touch.

"I love you." You mumble softly. Mizu gazes into your eyes with a love so true that it warms your very being.

"I love you too."

a/n: mwehheheheheeh hope yall enjoyed that <3 not proofread will do it later mwehe

[sourellie]

hiii 🌷 could you please do gf!abby!!!! gf!ellie was so good i need more

hi honey!!! so sorry this took me so long to write...usual bad grammar and such.. overall headcanons and thoughts. me trying not to use the word yall. um mention of the word boobies. again on and off non apocalypse au. that's it i think Enjoy!!! ◠ ̫◠

while i know she's a strong woman. mentally and physically. i think she just wants to be babied. especially after a long day of patrol?!?! she comes home n jus lays with u while u take her hair out of the braid and rake your fingers through it. SHE LOVES IT!!!!!

ok i know i said this exact same thing about ellie. but she's a sleepy girl too!!! like if it was a competition abby would win by a mile. she comes home gets borderline naked, left in boxers with her boobies out, she hits the bed and within seconds she's out like a damn light

n also. i think she snores, not loud but you can definitely hear it n Its So Cute!!!! :333

and, hear me when i say this if you aren't in the bed with her she won't sleep. Refuses actually she could be so tired but if u aren't there Forget It!!!! she used to not sleep at all unless u were sleeping too but as i said, this girl has gotten progressively sleepier over the years

i think before you two started dating, you were the type of friends where everyone thought you were dating. which caused a few problems...but you two kinda led it on? without realizing? holding hands, always with each other, sharing beds. n you would wonder why people thought that?? "so you two aren't dating?" you and abby hand in hand shoulder to shoulder "no why would you think that?"

speaking Of!!! she was the first to realize she actually liked you, of course like i said your friendship had always been lovey dovey, so it was hard for her to take time out to realize her feelings for you were more than just really good friends who sometimes shared a kiss on occasion. it came naturally to her to confess, but nothing really changed. just more kisses for abby!!!!!

very clingy and forgive me for this but she would hold your hand while you peed if she could. she loves holding ur hand. idk if she's too big on pda tho.

either way she loves to follow you everywhere. like i said. if you got up to go to another room, she was right there behind u. sometimes she scares u cuz she's So quiet. "What are you doing?" u turn around and she's blocking the doorway

she loves to listen to u talk. blabbing about nothing and she'd still listen like it's the most important thing.

she has a Ton of cds you name it she probably has it. peter frampton, fleetwood mac!!! (two of my personal favs). she likes to sing them to u. n i think she likes dad rock as well, she picked it up obviously from her dad LOL.

for the girls that wear makeup (me :ppp) i think she loves when you leave kiss marks on her!!!! it's so sweet to her she'd never wash it off if you let her

i may dabble more with the friends before dating business in something bigger at a later date. hope u enjoyed. ･᷄-･᷅

[mossy-rock-in-a-field]

My Elderly Mother Plays Baldur's Gate: Part 4

If you're not up to date on the saga, my mom is having me play Baldur's Gate 3 on her behalf because she has trouble using controllers/keyboards but still wants to "smooch the wizard boy." She is playing a neutral good wood elf druid; this is a detailed account of her crimes. Part 1 & 2 Part 3

Hey, everybody! Thanks to everyone who followed my blog to keep up with my mom's adventures. Also, shout-out to whoever called my mom "Crime Mom" last time I posted about this; she really got a kick out of that. We played for a full day yesterday so we could really get into Act III and make some progress.

Here are the atrocities she committed during yesterday's play session:

My mom is very pissed that she cannot keep Myshka the white cat. When she found Myshka, she told him that she was his mother because of course she did. Naturally, Myshka started following her around the city after that, and she was SO thrilled about it. However, when we went back to camp to trade out a companion and immediately came back to the city, the cat wasn't following her anymore, and my mom was so fucking upset. ("That boy thinks I'm his mother and I LEFT HIM! Why can't I take my son back to my camp with us?") My mom told me to tell my "tumblr friends" that Myshka should be able to join our camp like Scratch and the owlbear cub. So, if any of you guys are from Larian—take notes, I guess. My mother demands a cat son.

Upon seeing Mystra for the first time in the Stormshore Tabernacle cutscene, my mom immediately said in the bitterest voice imaginable, "I'm prettier than her." She is, of course, right. Fuck Mystra, all my homies hate Mystra.

When we found the Hag Survivors Group, my mom asked me if she could try combat for the first time, and she actually started to get the hang of it. ("Left bumper, mom. No, that's the trigger. BUMPER. Other left. There you go.") However, she didn't fully understand what "area of effect" meant and decided to cast Fireball ("Ooh, I've always wanted to use that one!") in an enclosed space before I could stop her. She instantly incinerated Mayrina, the floorboards, and the paladin, Adrielle. I was so fucking proud of her but also laughing so hard I was nearly in tears. She had me reload the save for her.

My mom returned the stolen money to the Counting House's head banker, then asked me to rob the rest of the building on our way out. When I asked her about the logic of this particular decision, she said, "We're saving the city from mind flayers, so these funds are really going back into the local economy when you think about it. We're a great cause!" I have no idea why she didn't just keep the stolen pouch of money in the first place. We wasted so many scrolls and Arrows of Transposition to get everything out of those vaults.

She was FURIOUS when she found out Auntie Ethel wasn't actually dead. My dad called in the middle of the day to check in on dinner plans and mom kept him on the phone for at least ten minutes while she ranted about hags who "should stay dead when they're told to."

My mom adores Jaheira. The two of them are very similar to each other, so I think she gets a kick out of seeing Camp Mom do Camp Mom things that she would do if she were actually in the game. My mom also loves Minsc and Boo. TASTE.

Don't know how soon my mother will come back for another play session, but I'll keep you guys updated whenever I can! She has already asked me if I would DM a D&D session for her retired friends, so I'm trying to find time to do that. Maybe I'll do some updates on that if we get it going.

Thank for everyone's support! Crime Mom and I appreciate it.

[vrisrezis]

Just the progression of rocket and y/ns relationshio throughout the movies? Like their relationship in vol1, 2, infinity war, endgame, holiday special maybe? and then vol 3?

Vol 1 :

You and rocket aren’t the closest automatically, I imagine rocket being very sarcastic towards you as he normally is with everyone else. I imagine rocket would find you attractive right away though, and would not shy away from nicknames like doll. He’d do it in a teasing way though, to not make it the most noticeable that he’s perhaps interested in you. However if you are like him and happen to be animalistic, he is noticeably a little different in terms of his sarcasm and he’s more likely to grow a soft spot for you quickly. However, you form a close bond after you comfort him in his drunken state, when he calls himself a monster. You have no reason to be so kind to him, after everything he’s done since the two of you met, so it strikes a cord in him. From on that point he’s noticeably softer and he might even start to gain feelings that are a little deeper than just initial “oh they’re hot” his feelings only growing deeper when you comfort him when he thought he lost groot. Again, doing something out of kindness when you don’t have to.

Vol 2 :

The two of you are close friends at this point, you’ve helped him raise groot. All of them had, but you especially. Nowadays, you often talk to him while he’s tinkering with random things. You become mad at him for stealing batteries, which leads to you joining quill and the others on his dad journey. You two separate for the first time since knowing eachother, and rocket is left to self reflect on himself (thanks to yondu). He’s able to realize he’s been pushing people away or acting like he doesn’t care for them, he even does so with you. Yondu tells him, if he really loves you, he should show it. I imagine he stopped acting like he didn’t care for groot after watching him almost die, so I imagine that when he sees you again, after that point no longer pretends he doesn’t care for you. He ends up confessing he cares for you deeply, and while his confession is obviously romantic, you take it as platonic. He does this right before you try to save quill, and you’re still persistent even after his confession, so he’s forced to tase you. After that though, the two of you do finally make up and he properly apologizes to you.

I am groot:

The two of you have an unspoken relationship. You two are very much like parents to groot at this point, and groot makes this very aware to the both of you. You don’t think much of it, as it makes sense since you’ve helped rocket so much in taking care of groot. However there seems to be an unspoken tension that gets even stronger because of what he’s told you both, called you both. Rocket is not only more aware of his feelings, he’s more aware that groot knows. Rocket knows he should do something about his feelings, but he stays silent.

Infinity war:

While he is once again sad to see the two of you separate again, it’s for the fate of the universe. You decide to stay with the morons in order to keep them safe, and rocket understands. It’s in your nature to be selfless and that you’d want to keep your family safe. Also, the fact rocket and groot are gonna be with the god of thunder certainly helps you feel more secure in the fact he and groot will be fine. Rocket casually demands a hug goodbye from you, growing more comfortable at this point for his feelings towards you without saying anything outright. Your relationship always seemed very friendly, but this time it feels more intimate and romantic, despite the fact neither of you have made your feelings aware to one another.

Endgame:

The two of you find solace in one another after the loss of your family. You end up dating over the course of the 5 years you two spent on earth together. After all the grief and pain, it’s something rocket simply could not keep to himself anymore. Especially since, he truly wants you to know he loves and cares for you, deeply. He thought for a moment you were gone too, before you came to earth along with nebula and Tony. He has made the effort since then for you to realize how much he cares. The two of you seperate, you deciding to help Tony, Steve, and others go back in time. Rocket bids you farewell, giving you a nice hug and a kiss. You two reunite after all is said and done, happy to see one another in one piece, as well as your family.

Holiday special:

Your relationship is a newfound development by the other guardians at this point, but mantis still manages to find you two adorable whilst everyone else is kinda offput by it at the moment. Not in a bad way, it’s just kinda new to them. You spend a lot of your time together this day, and eventually helping mantis set up Christmas for Peter. You gave eachother special gifts to one another, you granted him a special weapon designed by the people of wakanda, a weapon that can turn into any weapon at will. And what he got you? A necklace you loved that he broke… forever ago. He’s very embarrassed about his gift in comparison to yours, but you were still happy with it. Oh, and Peter was in a funny mood that day, so he even set up a mistletoe for you two to kiss under.

Vol 3.

Since you spend most of it praying your beloved isn’t dead, you don’t exactly interact with him specifically … very much. You go through hell and back just to make sure he comes alive okay, and he does. You embrace eachother the second you see eachother again, a very different embrace than any other hug you two gave one another. A mutual agreement that you’re both glad rockets alive. You fight together (albeit you’re a little protective of him), and after everything’s said and done, rocket is the captain. You’re still by his side, but now you’re following orders. In the past you would’ve made fun of him for suggesting he was captain, but now, it just feels right.

[hollandsfavbabe]

Peter's Precarious Polyjuice Potion - part 2

Part 1

pairing: peter parker x stark!reader

synopsis: in which you and peter are forced to take extreme lengths to protect your secret relationship with the help of your shape shifting powers

warnings: lying, extreme secrecy, a very flawed plan, made up asgardian traditions, end of a secret relationship

word count: 9.3k

a/n OMG IT'S FINALLY HERE! I'm so sorry for how long it took (life's a lot to handle sometimes), but isn't it so worth it?? Nearly 10K words, she's a big one. Stay tuned for a very special announcement tomorrow, possibly involving a new series about some very magical characters ⚡🦁! Without further ado, please enjoy this very lengthy part two! I hope you love it as much as I loved writing it.

With only a little more than 24 hours to prepare for the impromptu family dinner, you and Peter wasted little time (other than the 30 minutes spent celebrating your stroke of genius). You spent the entire night practicing shifting in between forms; MJ for you and Flash for Peter.

While transfiguring your figure to match MJ’s wasn’t much of a challenge, you found it exciting getting to practice on another human, something you had never tried with your powers before. At first you had to retain physical contact with Peter to hold his transformation as Flash, clutching onto his hand as you perfected every portion of his to match the yearbook portrait reference you had of the obnoxious boy. Eventually, you started getting the handle on holding his transformation without touching him and then progressed to being able to change him from opposing sides of his bedroom with the simple swish of your finger.

Once all the technical work was figured out, you focused on perfecting the individual aesthetics and mannerisms of your faux significant others. For Peter, you stole one of Bruce Banner’s compression button ups that resembled something one of Flash’s butlers would’ve dressed him as and transfigured a lightsaber slap bracelet into the same ritzy watch that you’d seen on Flash’s sickly wrists from days he had haraseed you on Campus. Unlike Peter, who was fortunate to still attend school in New York, Flash had followed you to MIT which allowed you to develop a form for Peter that was closer to the person he was now and help him slip into character.

One of Peter’s flannels sufficed for your own transformation into MJ, but neither of you had quite the right dark bottoms outside of Peter’s Night Monkey suit from your SHIELD hijacked senior trip. You tried to call her as she had remained one of your closest friends, but it always went to her voicemail no matter how many times you tried. You figured she was still in school as resorted to a midnight trip to the nearest Target, picking up a pair of black jeans that you thought suited her. Of course becoming MJ to date Peter publicly wasn’t ideal, but it was so much better than having to change into Flash.

By morning you both felt confident in your disguise and focused on narrowing down the specifics of your plan. Before long, it was time for your scheme to turn into a reality.

As previously decided, you and Peter left the Campus under the guise of two platonic friends going their separate ways to pick up two beloved dates. In reality, while your father and Pepper were hard at work in the kitchen. You transformed your cars to resemble the area of forest around them and returned to Peter’s room to get ready, evading the cameras with the same transformative tactic. Simple objects like cars were much easier for you to transform, meaning holding it wouldn’t be a challenge. People on the other hand, were much more complicated and a successful heist of this nature would require full activation of your powers. It would be exhausting, but you knew you could do it. You were determined to succeed, another blessing that accompanied your inherited stubbornness.

You and Peter lounged about in his room undetected by the others for around an hour, the amount of time it took to pick up ‘MJ’, before it was time to start the show. You both dressed and hobbled over to Peter’s window where he jumped before you. Upon receiving his shout of survival, you also shimmied out and jumped into Peter’s waiting arms below as he caught you with ease.

“Are you ready for this?” he asked, setting you down on the ground while keeping an arm locked around your waist. As your boyfriend, he knew what a transformation of this size meant in relation to your health and worried as the considerate person he was.

You enclosed his hands in your own and closed your eyes. With a deep breath, you allowed the familiar skin-tingling sensation to surround you as your form was replaced with MJ’s. You open your eyes to meet the dark sea of murky brown enclosed in Peter’s and shoot him an assured smile along with a nod of approval.

“Let’s do this.”

It was with his hand entwined with yours that you made your way to the entrance of the most hospitable area of the campus where you knew the kitchen resided. The normally undecorated door sported a festive green wreath with red bows and silver bells embedded on the small branches as you rapt upon the wood and stepped head first into the lion den.

“I’m back!” Peter called, and immediately you two were greeted by Steve at the door. He took Peter’s coat from him like the old-fashioned gentlemen he was and as he turned to get yours, you had to fight hard to suppress the urge to smile at him like usual. Your persona has changed, you remind yourself, and the girl you’ve taken on does not smile at strangers. Ever. Instead you acknowledged Steve as stone faced as possible in the same manner MJ would’ve if she had done it herself.

“Nice to meet you MJ,” Steve smiled as he extended his hand to you, gesturing towards the thick flannel you had on. “May I take your coat?”

You eyed him down and shook your head.

“No, I like the cold.” you mumbled and walked off to the main room where Peter and the rest of the Avengers were so anxiously awaiting you, your father setting the last dishes on the table as they came out of the steaming kitchen.

“MJ!” he bellowed through the mass of hungry heroes at the sight of you and you can't help but feel strange about being called something other than the several names he had given you over his many years raising you. “We’re so glad to have you. Peter’s told us so much about you!”

You looked at your father with the same expression you had seen MJ give strangers many times before and nodded as he came forward, careful not to match his smile. You had to be absolutely unreadable, especially around your father or else your plan was sure to fail.

“Thanks for the invite. I’m happy to be here.” you recited in your practiced monotone voice, closely resembling MJ’s, but not quite mimicking it. You could feel your heart start pounding as your father eyed you with suspicion, his eyes narrowing at you.

“Have we met before? I feel like I know your voice from somewhere.”

You gulped as silently as you could, fighting hard against your nerves as your palms began to sweat. You balled them up before the perspiration could drip and gave a simple shake of your head, trying to stay as close to MJ as possible.

“I don’t believe so.” you stared him down with a classic MJ look; eyes in a half-lidded gaze and lips upturned into a bored sort of state.

“Hmm.” your father paused to ponder, his eyes scanning down to your balled fists that gave off a contradicting message to the thoughtless aura you aimed for. It was by the grace of a higher power that Pepper finally swooped in to save you, laughing angelicaly at Tony’s antics.

“Give her some space Tony! She’ll never come back if she thinks she’ll be suffocated.” she grinned and latched onto one of the arms he held propped upon his hips to pull him away from you. Instead she pushed him in the direction of the nicely set table and gestured for the others to take a seat.

“We just finished setting everything up, except for the main courses, so you’re welcome to come take a seat, MJ.” she offered, plopping down to the left of your father once he was settled in the head chair. You took note of the others as Bucky, Sam, Steve, Thor, and Natasha took their respective seats, leaving four empty chairs reserved for the couples that were supposedly attending.

Peter was by your side in an instant as if he could read the thoughts of doubt racing through your head. He took your hand and squeezed ever so slightly to remind you that neither of you were alone and that he wasn’t going anywhere. You wished you could show him how grateful you were for him, but even the semblance of a smile would’ve given you away to the others. Yet even under your mask, Peter could read you. It was a talent he had adopted from years of being around you and no matter what you put off for others, somehow he always knew.

He led you to your seats and pulled out a chair for you before claiming his own seat in between you and Bucky. You began to dish yourself up small helpings of every dish that was indicated as vegetarian friendly, a gesture from Pepper after Peter had told her about the real MJs dietary restrictions. You were lucky most of her sides ended up being meat-free naturally as any extra miles ran for ‘MJ’s comfort would’ve been taken in vain. Afterall, you would have to eat for two people the whole night.

It was while you were buttering up a plump Hawaiian roll that you realized that all of the other Avengers were staring at you, an awkward silence enveloping the room.

“So, MJ, tell us about yourself.” Natasha prompted, growing tired of the tension. She wasn’t as suspecting of you as you father who was eerily silent as he poured gravy on his mashed potatoes.

You cleared your throat as you rehearsed your background, careful not to break from character for a single moment.

“You guys probably already know, I used to go to school with Peter. That’s how we met. We didn’t have many classes together, but we were on the decathlon team together, so I guess that’s cool.”

“So I’m sure you know my daughter as well, right?” your father brought you up from across the table. He would’ve startled you if you hadn't been in such control of your expressions. Instead you gave him a curt nod, turning your head to peer at him.

“Yep, I was friends with her before Peter actually.”

“Well that’s wonderful!” he grinned, though you were sure you could sense the slightest tone of insincerity. “You know, she's coming tonight, but she’ll be a bit late. She went to pick up her boyfriend. You should know Flash, right?”

You felt Peter’s thigh nudge yours from underneath the table as you hesitated to reply, a reminder of the story you were to recite as soon as someone brought up Flash. It was imperative, otherwise the pieces needed to assemble the perfect date night heist wouldn’t fall into place as you had planned them.

“Oh, I can’t be around Flash for too long. He’s a real creeper.” you deadpanned. The other Avengers froze in the middle of their meal, all setting down their utensils and staring at you with intrigue.

“Like in the mortal television program? What is its name … Mind Facts?” Thor asked through a mouthful of cranberry sauce that he evidently had not learned was supposed to be enjoyed with other foods.

“Are you talking about Minecraft? The video game?” Peter suggested, the only person present who was young enough to make sense of the god’s unintelligible examples.

“Yes! The Craft of Mining!” Thor exclaimed. “‘Tis a much enjoyable endeavor indeed.”

“No, I’m pretty sure she means that this Flash kid makes her uncomfortable.” Sam reasoned, stamping out the sidetracked babble at the source as everyone’s attention returned to you.

“What do you mean, MJ?” asked Pepper. Despite all your preparation, you were suddenly realizing how much you lacked an explanation for why you and Flash couldn’t be together other than the truth. Without completely reasoning through it, you conjured up the best lie and let it slip out of MJ’s lips as the immediate regret sunk it.

“I have a … restraining order.”

SIlence washed over the table as the Avengers looked at you in surprise. Even Peter seemed shocked, but he quickly morphed his expression into one of remorse as if he had already known about the tragedy you had just made up out of thin air.

“What happened?” asked Bucky curiously, before receiving a hard elbow from Sam for asking such an invasive question.

“I don’t want to get into it.” you replied, satisfied with the severity of your lie preventing any further questioning out of respect for your fantastical situation. “It's fine though. He can be here as long as I’m in another room.”

“That reminds me,” Peter stood, clearing his throat. “I haven't shown you my room yet. Wanna check it out?”

“Sure,” you shrugged and stood to take his arm as the two of you headed towards his room, leaving a table of conflicted Avengers in your wake. Your father parted his lips, nearly calling you back to the table long after you and Peter had snuck out of sight until the sudden blare of the doorbell rang out from the entrance.

“I got it, ” he assured Steve who was eager to open the door until he was encouraged to stay at the table. This time your father went to open it and was met with you smiling in your normal form, your hand hooked in the crevice of a strange boy’s elbow that he had never seen before, Flash. Well, more accurately, Flash/Peter. In the two minutes you and Peter had been gone, you both managed to change into different outfits and transform into different people.

“Hey dad!” you greeted, leaning forward to kiss his cheek as you did all you could to separate yourself from the quiet stone-faced girl you had been pretending to be only a moment ago.

“Hey junior,” your dad smiled, pulling you into a casual hug before stepping back to motion you inside. You hurried in with Flash/Peter right behind you though he stopped in front of your father and held out one of his transfigured hands to shake Tony’s, grinning at him in a weird not even Flash like way that you supposed would have to do. “You must be the famous Flash!” your dad smiled back, accepting the shake before pulling the disguised boy inside.

Flash/Peter’s watch glinted in the artificial light of the dining room, the cherry on top of a perfect disguise. You had used a slap bracelet to make it,  transforming the original green of the lightsaber blade it took the shape of into something that resembled a Rolex.

“Famous?” Flash/Peter quirked an eyebrow as he began removing his own puffy jacket. “I don’t know about famous. I’m a pretty mediocre guy if I do say so myself.”

You kneed your boyfriend in the leg, a not so subtle reminder that he was supposed to be a walking endorsement for the person he was presenting as Flash naturally was. He doubled over in pain and you ignored whatever strange looks your fellow Avengers sent your way.

“Ahh.” he groaned, keeping his whimper down so as to not give his real voice away.

“Isn’t he just the silliest?” you mustered another fake grin that was becoming easier to produce with each front you hoisted up to protect your plan. You pulled Flash/Peter back up so he could be straight on his feet once more and headed towards the table, sitting in the only two seats with empty plates. “He gets so funny when he’s nervous. I’ve been trying to remind him he can be himself.” you enunciated the last part for your boyfriend’s sake.

“Oh you’re so right sweetie,” Flash/Peter reached to hold onto your hand. “I just don’t want anyone to think I’m a conceded assho-”

“Turkey’s ready,” you heard Pepper announce as she brought the large bird out from the kitchen and set it on the table. You hadn’t even noticed her absence at the table throughout all the chaos of pretending to be two people. You were reminded of your alter-ego as she set down a smaller dish closer to where you had been eating before. “I also have a vegan substitute for MJ.”

“So, Flash,” your dad began, retaking his position as the head of the table as he began carving at the turkey. “MJ and Peter were here not long ago. I’m guessing you know about them?”

“Of course I do, Mr. Star- I mean Tony,” Flash/Peter corrected himself, careful not to slip up by calling your father a name that was all too easy to trace back to Peter. The correction however, was almost worst as you noticed your father’s brows indent into the glare of a skeptic. “I’m friends with Peter actually. He’s a great kid.”

“That’s funny. I could’ve sworn he was just saying the exact opposite about you.” Sam pointed out, crossing his arms as he set down his fork. He could tell something was off as the man rarely mentioned Peter without sneaking in a jab.

You burst out laughing as an attempt to ward off the growing tension. It was all too artificial.

“Isn’t he just the sweetest?! He always thinks the best of everyone!” you exclaimed, throwing an arm around your boyfriend and flashing the table a false smile.

“Then how do you explain the restraining order?” blurted Bucky, joining Sam in the skepticism.

Flash/Peter’s eyes widened as he failed to provide an answer, nearly abandoning his impression of Flash’s voice.

“It was uhh… a total misunderstanding? I’m sorry, is MJ here? Like right now?” he asked, as if the information was new to him.

“She just went upstairs with Peter,” your father answered, though some of the cheer in his tone had been lost. He suddenly turned to you, and while you weren’t currently in your disguise, his stare felt like a flashlight as if he could see right through you. “I told you we were all going to be eating together. Why didn’t you tell me that she and Flash don’t get along?”

You mentally cursed yourself at the idea. Perhaps if you had spun your lies differently, you and Peter could’ve pretended for two seperate dinners instead of trying to juggling both to hold it together for one.

“I forgot?” you shrugged. “Honestly, I don’t think the restraining order is that big of a deal anymore.”

“Great! That means we can all eat together,” your father cheered, the prospect of his plan coming together overpowering any suspicion he had of you. He stood from his spot at the head of the table and veered in the direction of Peter’s room. “I’ll go get them.”

“No!” you shouted, dread corrupting your face until you noticed the warning look from Flash/Peter to correct yourself. Any extreme objection would be a dead giveaway.

You cleared your throat with a laugh and stood, pushing away from the table. “I mean, no, that’s okay. I can go get them,” you offered. “Flash, do you want to come with me sweetie? I should probably show you where the bathroom is. He has indigestion”

“Oh yes, that would be lovely.” Flash/Peter agreed as he stood with you. He sent you a subtle wink, confirmation of a successful save.

“Okay,” your father agreed, settling more of your worries until his gaze slipped towards Flash/Peter’s wrist where you had forgotten about the transfigured watch. “Just remember to take off your slap bracelet.”

Your heart dropped as you looked down at Flash/Peter’s wrist to discover the enchantment had faded, a symptom of your anxiety. You had been so focused on keeping up the facade of his facial features, the watch detail had entirely slipped from your control revealing Peter’s extremely recognizable lightsaber slap bracelet.

Flash/Peter looked down at his wrist, his eyes widening as he came to the same realization and proceeded to hide his entire hand behind his back.

“I don't know what you mean.” he tried and it took every morsel of your remaining strength not to slap yourself in the face.

“That’s really funny, Flash, because I swear Peter has one just like it,” your father declared to the table, one of the detriments of having a dad that knew your boyfriend so well. “He’s obsessed with Leia’s green lightsaber.”

“No, the blue one is Leia. This one is Luke’s!”

Silence took over the atmosphere in the room accompanied by stares of shock as Flash/Peter’s correction landed. You knew he couldn’t help it, Peter hated when people got Star Wars general knowledge wrong, but boy was the timing inconvenient. 

“Uh, I mean, that’s what Peter would say. He loves that kind of stuff. Oh god, my stomach hurts so bad. We should go babe.” Peter tried to cover, gesturing for you to escape with him to what was presumably the restroom though you were starting to think maybe there were better odds of your survival if the two of you booked it for the nearest remote village instead.

“Sure thing,” you nodded as you escorted him from the room, trying your best to ignore the suspicion that you could feel rising. The operation was still salvageable as long as you and Peter were convincing enough.

“Y/n said that dinner was ready?” Peter said only a moment later, reemerging into the kitchen as himself with you by his side in your MJ disguise once more.

“Yep! You guys can go ahead and take your seats.” Pepper smiled, seemingly the only person unphased by your slap bracelet slip up. You and Peter both did as you were told, sliding into your seats and digging into the meal.

“This is delicious Mr. Stark.” you deadpanned, offering a compliment to your father in hopes that it would subside his skepticism.

“Actually, I made it.” Sam interrupted in between bites, wishing for credit where it was due. You nodded in his direction, trying not to emote.

“Oh, well thanks Sam. It’s good.”

“How did you know my name is Sam?”

You shrugged in a manner that seemed aligned with MJ’s performed disinterest though inside you feel like you could explode on the spot.

“You just seem like a Sam,” you covered. “Or an Anthony, I just went with the first choice.”

“It’s Falcon to you, hot shot.” Sam returned, taking another bite of his turkey. You weren’t unused to harsh comments from him in your usual form so you simply returned to your own plate.

“MJ,” your father beckoned for your attention to which you gave it to him. “I thought you were vegan.”

“Oh, yeah I am.” you nodded. Panic erupted through your core, but you tried to contain it on the surface.

“Then why aren’t you eating the special option I prepared for you?”

“Yeah and why are you in Flash’s seat, Peter?” Pepper joined the questioning. It was then you realized that Peter had chosen the seat to your left where he had previously been dining as Flash rather than his assigned seat on your right.

“My bad, I didn’t realize he was sitting here.” Peter awkwardly rose and moved to sit in the correct spot.

“Yes, and while I appreciate the effort, I can have meat on Wednesdays so it’s okay.” you fibbed. Your father had never strayed from the path of being a practicing carnivore and so you hoped his lack of vegan insight was enough to be unaware that there were no breaks.

“So, how long have you two been seeing each other?” questioned Natasha, changing the dangerous topic of conversation though you supposed her reasons for asking we drastically different from yours.

“Four months.” Peter answered.

“Two weeks.” you chimed at the exact same time of Peter’s own response earning a conflicting look from the other Avengers.

“Uh we mean four months and two weeks.” he covered. “But honestly it feels like we’ve known each other for way longer.”

“Probably because we have known each other longer.” you elbowed Peter under the table, a stabbing reminder of the backstory the two of you had spent an hour preparing earlier that day. Perhaps the time would’ve been better spent constructing an exact timeline.

“Oh right, because we’ve gone to school together since middle school.” he smiled, reminded of your carefully constructed story that pulled from when he had first met the real MJ so many years ago.

“So that means you know my daughter!” you dad exclaimed, though the majority of the genuine excitement he had showed during your first appearance of MJ had completely disappeared. “She just got here with Flash. I know you can’t be in the same room as him, but you really should say hi. I can show you to her room.”

“Oh no need!” you assured him, though with too much enthusiasm. You had to swallow it down as you stood, returning to the character that resembled MJ. “I can go find her myself, I’ll be right back.”

“Yeah and I really have to use the bathroom.” Peter stated, replacing his napkin from his lap into the chair likely so that he would know where to sit when he returned as Flash.

“I’m pretty sure Flash is in occupance of the lavatory.” Thor informed your boyfriend.

“Oh, well in that case, I’m going to use the one all the way across Campus.” he stated and at once the two of you were charging towards the exit. Overall, your confidence in your performance was starting to plummet, but you hoped it was convincing enough.

“What is up with these kids?” your father asked once you and Peter were far out of earshot. He consulted the table for any take similar to his own. There was something off about your and Peter’s dates and he intended to figure out exactly what it was.

“I bet it’s some kind of college disease that’s spreading around. You remember how crazy it can get.” Pepper shrugged, the least suspecting of the table apart from Steve who was always slowest to process anything out of the ordinary.

“I wasn’t that bad. At least I could hold a conversation for more than five minutes without running off.” 

“I wish Wanda would’ve come,” Bucky stated, reflecting on her mind reading capabilities. “I swear she only scheduled that date with Vision to miss this.”

It was not even a moment later that you and Peter returned flushed from the quick change into the alternative couple, Flash/Peter taking the napkin-less seat.

“Feeling better Flash?” your father asked though his tone made it sound more like teasing.

“Hmm - oh! Yeah, much! This all looks delicious by the way. My compliments to the chef.”

“Thank you-” Sam had started to say, until he was abruptly cut off by your father.

“That would be me,” Tony took credit, and while you were confused by the blatant lie, you were sure it had something to do with his ever growing suspicions.

“Ahh yes, well, thank you Tony.” Flash/Peter eyed your father. As in tune with your boyfriend as you were, you swore the assumed first name basis was on purpose now to defame the real Flash.

“Except for the mead. Only the finest can come from Asgard-” Thor started, before he was shot down as quickly as Sam had been by the very same man.

“Speaking of compliments, I just love your T-Shirt,” your father praised, abandoning his plate to stare at Flash/Peter with curious gaze. It was even more frightening than any of your previous slip ups as he hogged every question to point out every flaw in your plan.  “Does Peter know you’re borrowing his clothes?”

Flash/Peter looked down to the wrinkled shirt on his shapeshifted chest, the white text starkly contrasting the black cotton to spell out, “Right now I’m in a galaxy far far away…” You couldn’t believe he had forgotten to take it off. It was a dead giveaway as no one else in the campus, in the whole of New York even was as much of a Star Wars fanatic as your boyfriend as emphasized by his slap bracelet.

You stood up from your place beside Flash/Peter and pulled him away from the table with enough force that it might’ve ripped his arm off had he not had the strength of Spider-Man even when trapped in his school nemesis’ body.

“Oh that’s so funny. Flash must’ve borrowed it from the pile in my closet.” you rambled out an excuse.

“You have a stash of Peter’s weird nerdy T-shirts?” Natasha commented as she lifted her glass of wine to take an overly lengthy sip.

“They’re not weird! Just punny.” Flash/Peter defended in a voice that was all too reminiscent of his natural tone rather than the false falsetto that Flash spoke in. You elbowed him as the two of you ducked away to change.

“We’ll just go put it back now!” you shouted to the table before disappearing out of sight.

“Wasn’t Peter wearing that shirt tonight?” Steve wondered aloud.

“I don’t know,” Sam shrugged. “I couldn’t tell with that goofy flannel he had on over it. How many years has he lived here and no one’s taught him how to dress himself. I think that should be the next operation.”

“Yeah, we could call it Operation Put Peter’s Pull-Overs to Death.” Bucky agreed.

“Guys, let’s look at the bigger problem here,” Tony interrupted as he quite frankly didn’t mind how Peter dressed. “Don’t all four of these teens seem suspicious to you.”

“Well I suppose a little bit, but it could be winter festivities.” Thor shrugged, unbothered by the whole affair.

“What the hell is a winter festivity?”

“He means Christmas.” Natasha filled.

“He’s not from where Christmas is celebrated.” stated Tony before turning to the god for further elaboration.

“In Asgard, winter festivities are when the finest of young people come together to fill the chilled night air with the sweet scent of love-”

“And I’ve heard enough of that.” Bucky forced the story to a stop, nearly running out of his seat quicker than you and Peter had.

“We’re at dinner for the love of God!” Sam looked at Thor with the most incredulous of expressions.

“That’s exactly what I mean, it is for the love of gods.”

“Quiet! I can hear them coming back,” Tony shushed, hoping that what the two of you pulled next would be enough to expose whatever you were hiding. Now, be super analytical here. Watch for any slip ups.”

You and Peter returned to the table, sitting back down in the seats of MJ and Peter once more carving into your meal. Peter was able to swallow a few more bites, but your anxiety surrounding being caught had caused you to lose your appetite.

“Wow, this is so good.” Peter groaned.

“Yeah, you’ve mentioned that.” Sam chided. He too was getting tired of the game at play as he started noticing the same signs your father pointed out.

“Right, well, I thought I should do it again.”

“I hear you’re studying literature, MJ,” your father sent you a question. “With a specialty in classical era Russian authors?”

You gulped down your food nervously as you nodded though you couldn’t recall ever telling your father about MJ’s academic choices. You completely missed the discrete screen he had opened on his lap under the table that he had used to look up all of your friend’s credentials. It was one of the perks of being Tony Stark, he could gain access to anyone’s personal information with the simple tap of a button.

“That’s right.” you agreed, determined not to break from your expressionless front.

“Did you know that Natasha used to live there?” your father inquired and at once you knew what he was getting at.

“No, I didn’t. What was it like?” you replied, hoping he wasn’t about to do what you thought he was. But you and your father were all too similar and if there was a move you suspected him of making, chances were he would do it.

“Well,” Natasha cleared her throat, setting down the silverware she had once used to sift through her mashed potatoes. “- other than becoming a child assassin and spending every day of my childhood being brutally beaten to a pulp everyday to withstand the worst conditions that a hit might include, it was awful.”

“Wow, I’m sorry.” Peter sympathized, caught off guard by the misfortune of the whole story.

“Yeah it’s tragic,” your father brushed off, turning back to focus on you like the lense of a telescope narrowing in on the target star. “Now, you should really practice some Russian, with Natasha.”

“Tony, stop it.” Pepper tried in an attempt to stop the ambush from going too far, but she knew him as well as you did. When Tony Stark had an idea, he was like a bull chasing the red of a woven cloth. If anyone got between him and his goal, they would be squashed from the sheer force of his will.

“What?” he asked, as if he was clueless to the exposing plan that was currently in motion.

“You have that look in your eye. You know that one you get when you think you’re onto something?” 

“I’ve also seen him get it over a new microscope. While it was still in the box.” Peter added. You caught your laugh just in time, putting all your efforts into staying in character.

“Enough, we promised to keep that between us,” your father flashed angry eyes towards Peter before looking at Natasha. “Come on, Nat. Just one line of Russian? Wouldn’t you like that MJ?”

“No I wouldn’t…” you shook your head, though being MJ requires you to be less vehement than normal.

“Oh, but it would help you!”

“Fine, if it makes you shut up.” Nat gave in, before turning to you in your MJ form. You could feel your heart sink in your chest as if the growing weight from the pressure was starting to sink it.

“он думает, что ты лжешь” she spoke, and it didn’t take an expert in the language to know that her accent and inflections beyond perfection. She made a nod towards your father, a subtle attempt to warn you that he knew your plan was failing while she took your side. Little did she know, underneath the cool palette of MJ’s stone expression, you were panicking worse than ever before in your life which you could’ve conveyed had you ever learned to speak Russian.

“So, what did she say, MJ?” your father prompted.

“She dove a soak.” you replied in the best accent you could muster (which ended up being closer to a classic Californian tone than Russian), earning a stern look from Natasha.”

“Did you just say what I think you did?” she glared and you stood up with Peter, heading back in the direction of his bedroom.

“No - I - my notes are upstairs! Let me just go get them really quick.” you motioned for Peter to follow you, deciding that now was a good time for the two of you to switch as you feared being literally snapped in half by the Black Widow.

“See, I told you something’s off!” Tony exclaimed as soon as the two of you had vanished, his tablet above the table as he examined the real MJ’s Seal of Biliteracy.

“I hope you’re right. Otherwise Peter’s girlfriend just totally called me a fucking bitch in Russian and I don’t often let people get away after insulting me like that.”

“Cool it, Widow. I promise you, she did not understand an ounce of that conversation. MJ’s Cornell profile doesn’t even mention Russian,” he pulled up his screen to further inspect, zooming in on the certificate. “She’s actually studying Japanese.”

“Tony.” Pepper groaned at the sight of her husband holding the invasive tech.

“What?!”

“You are undoubtedly the worst iPad kid I’ve ever come across. And we live with Morgan!”

“Aren’t you more concerned with the fact that he can just access people’s private information on a whim?” Steve interjected.

“No. We’re all used to that.” Bucky shrugged as he was quite indifferent on the matter. He didn’t even have a personal phone for Tony to stalk.

“Got some embarrassing searches, Captain?” Sam teased from beside him. But Tony was on it before Steve even had a chance to think about a response.

“None other than the fact that he looks up Bluey on a daily basis to watch clips of it on Youtube.” Tony switched to a new tab that contained a detailed review of Steve’s search history before switching back to MJ and looking up Flash’s profile on Harvard for further opportunities of exposure.

“Hey! That’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Steve exclaimed as he crossed his arms against his chest. “I love the Heeler family.”

“But I pay for Disney+. Why do you have to watch it on YouTube?” Tony protested before tucking his tablet away again at the sight of Flash reentering the room, only it wasn’t your face that smiled at the group as you entered, but MJ’s.

“We’re back!” Flash/Peter exclaimed, holding your hand close to him as if you were actually his date. You clutched onto his bicep, missing the firm muscle of Peter’s normal arm as you squeezed Flash’s much more flaccid one. It was then you noticed the disturbed looks from the table of Avengers.

“What?” you asked, moving one of your hands to pat your cheeks. “Do I have something on my face?”

“No, but you are holding onto the wrong man.” Bucky pointed out to which you realized that you, MJ, were holding the person that you were supposed to have a restraining order against.

You let out a scream as you tore yourself from Flash/Peter and booked it back in the direction you had come from. Peter was only a few seconds behind you as he started calling your name in Flash’s whiny voice.

“I’m starting to see it now,” Thor acknowledged as the gaps in your plan started growing too wide to go unnoticed any longer. “These young mortals are not who they pretend to be.”

“I told you!” Tony exclaimed. “I think y/n’s powers are behind it. There is no way that she and Flash just happen to appear right when MJ and Peter leave.”

“Either that, or this is just one bad Disney Channel show plot.” Steve shook his head, earning a crude stare from your father.

“What? First I got scolded for not using Disney+ and now I’m getting scolded for using it? Make up your mind!”

You returned as MJ only a few seconds later with Peter at your side as you thought it too risky to change into your other disguises considering the possibility of admonishment.

“Sorry guys, y/n is taking care of the restraining order stuff.” Peter professed as the two of you stood behind your chairs, but opted not to sit down in case you needed to quickly change.

“Is she now?”

“Yep.” you agreed, pulling out your phone as a distraction, hoping the Avengers would just see you as a blatantly disrespectful teenager rather than a skilled liar. You hated the thought of besmirching MJ’s image, but it had to be done to keep your secret. After everything else that had fallen apart, it was all you could resort to.

“Alright, that’s it!” your father exclaimed. “The jig is up you guys, we know what this is.”

“What?” your heart started beating wildly in your chest as you looked up from your game of Subway Surfers.

“I know you’re not really MJ. And I also know that if I went upstairs right this second, that neither Flash nor my daughter would be there.” your father stated, standing and moving closer to you as he revealed your biggest fear since starting the whole operation.

“No, I am and they definitely are!” you countered, losing the quiet aggressiveness of MJ’s normal tone as you defended yourself.

“Then how do you explain your phone case, huh? It looks exactly like the one I got y/n for her birthday last year.”

You looked at your phone case that displayed a solid ivory background and was covered with silly nods to the Harry Potter saga, something your father knew you would love. You laid it case-down on the table so it could blend in as  any ordinary phone once more.

“So, what if I’m just borrowing her phone case?” you narrowed your eyes at him.

“Like Peter just borrowed Flash’s whole outfit?” he returned and instantly all eyes were on Peter who was not in his flannel ensemble, but his counterparts silly con style instead. He looked down at his clothes and cursed.

“Damn it, I knew I was forgetting something.”

“This has been really funny, said no one at this table, but it’s time to give it up.” your father ordered, but out of the many traits you had missed out inheriting from him, stubbornness wasn’t one of them. You glared a deathly stare at him, your nose scrunching as you painted on your meanest face.

“I am MJ!” you glowered, slightly raising your tone so that he would take you seriously.

At that very second, your phone screen lit up with the familiar likeness of MJ’s contact photo and the swipe to answer button as she decided on the exact moment that you were trying to be deceptive to call you. It was all over.

“Answer it.” your father ordered and you knew you had no choice. You picked up the phone and put it on speaker as per his instructions.

“Hey y/n!” the voice of MJ greeted you through the phone in her usual friendly monotone that she often used when speaking to you. While you had only known each other the last few years of high school and didn’t go to the same college, you two were fairly close.

“Hi,” you replied shakily. There was no going back now.

“Listen, I don't have much time, I gotta get back to one of my classes, but I wanted to know what your plans are for the rest of break so we could find a space to hang out.”

“Uh yeah, I’ll let you know. I’m not doing much, just in a lot of trouble.” you confessed taking in the absolute fury of your father. If looks could kill, you would be six feet under. Honestly, you couldn’t tell if he was more mad at you or proud of himself.

“Oh, ok. Well can you pass the message onto Peter? He would be invited too of course. I’ve already asked Ned.”

“Great. I’ll tell him.” you swallowed.

“I’ll talk to you later, I’ve really gotta go now.”

“Okay, Bye.”

Your heart sank as you set your phone down again and faced the reality of your choices. Your father knew and there was no fooling him anymore.

“Alright, give it up you two.” your father ordered.

“But, I’m not-” you tried, but of course it was no use.

“Now!”

You sighed as you let the facade fall, crestfallen upon your revealed appearance. At once Peter was at your side as your curly hair returned to its natural stage and color and your normal face emerged from MJ’s.

“Busted,” Tony crossed his arms and stared at the two of you. “I’m guessing Peter was Flash.”

“What the hell is going on?” Pepper questioned, the only one who had fallen for the high jinks.

“It’s a scheme! They aim to commit high trickery!” Thor accused, slamming his fists on the table.

“Relax Thor, let Tony finish speaking.” Steve requested, much less disturbed than the others despite the fact that he had also been victim to your foolery.

You couldn’t even meet your father's gaze, far too embarrassed by the failure at your attempt at concealing your relationship. You knew he was eyeing you down with his startling stare, you could tell by his shifting posture. You looked over to Peter who was equally ashamed looking, wishing that you could hold him close.

“What is this?” your father inquired, his brown stern eyes burning into you like a brand into hide.

“Requesting clarification, sir,” Peter uttered. You had learned from past experiences that he often slipped into using strange vernacular when in an awkward situation.

“Peter, I caught you in a game of hooky. That doesn’t mean you become a robot.”

“Right, sorry….sir,” Peter apologized, using the name he had been wanting to call Tony all along.

“I want to know exactly what's going on here… from you.”

Sensing general attention shifting in your direction, you lifted your head to see his finger pointed in your direction. You knew there was no denying his authority though you didn’t think there was much to explain.

“I think it’s pretty obvious what’s going on.” Natasha interjected, but she was brought down by Pepper who wanted you to get your chance at explaining. There was very little you could get out.

“I’m sorry, dad.”

“Why don't you two have real dates?”

“We’re not really dating those people Mr. Stark,” Peter contributed, hoping to take some of the weight off his shoulders, though it didn’t help much.

“So when I asked you who Peter was dating, you made up an answer?”

“Yes.” you admitted, lowering your head in shame once more.

“I knew it! He is gay!” Bucky exclaimed.

“What?” gasped Peter as he sent the soldier a well earned look of absolute shock. You couldn’t help, but roll your eyes.

“I already told you, he’s not gay!” you repeated your earlier statement, hoping it was enough to finally put the rumors to rest.

“Then why are you pretending to be his girlfriend?” your father asked and you knew you couldn't hide it any longer.

“I’m not, dad. I’m not pretending to be his girlfriend.”

“But you are quite literally in clothing you would never wear to try and act like someone else.”

“Yeah, if you two didn’t actually have dates, you could’ve canceled.” Sam pointed out though you suspected he only spoke due to his longing to be literally anywhere else.

“Right, okay so I did do that, but MJ is not Peter’s girlfriend. She never was.” you explained and at once you could tell the truth had finally snapped in place.

Your father’s eyes widened as he started to catch on to what you were saying. You nodded at him, taking a step closer to Peter and intertwining his hand in yours. He made it all obvious from the mere look he was giving you, soft and compassionate, two of your favorite parts of him. You could only imagine how in awe your expression was in return.

“I am.” you confirmed, though you hadn’t needed to say anything at all.

There was silence as the rest of the Avengers took in the reveal for a while before Tony broke the silence again.

“How long has this been going on for?”

You gulped.

“Three years.”

Your father nodded, pondering over the information before erupting in applause with the other Avengers joining just behind him and passing high fives all around as Tony shouted “I was right!”

You didn’t understand. He had seemed so angry at you seconds ago and none of it made any sense considering his ancient rule. No dating superheros, he had been preaching it long before you and Peter ever met. Yet it didn’t change the scene before you, the celebration played out as if they were footballers who had just won the championships.

“What the hell?” you cried?

“What?” your father paused all congratulations to turn to you.

“You’re not mad?” you questioned.

“Maybe a little about you lying for so long, but I gotta say, I am more impressed than I am mad. Why would I be mad?”

You almost couldn’t believe it. How could he forget his oldest rule?

“Because I’m not allowed to date him?” you stated as if it were obvious. It should’ve been, but somehow he hadn’t remembered.

“Why would that be?”

You stared at your dad in disbelief as the cheering instantly disbanded. The confusion you felt bubbles into a strange form of frustration. While you weren’t quite angry, you were blown away by the forgetfulness of your father.

“You said I’m not allowed to date superheroes! EVER! That’s like your oldest rule!”

“That's sad,” whispered Sam to Bucky, though it was loud enough that everyone heard it. You turned to glare at him before a large gasp erupted from your father and at once you could tell he remembered. You could feel it now, the shower of disappointment that awaited you, but instead all you heard was laughter.

Your father was laughing! Chuckling at the prospect of such a rule even though it was his very own. You stared at him, mouth agape as you waited for an explanation.

“Oh! Junior,” he chuckled, calling you by the nickname you had held from a young age. “I made that rule when you were obsessed with Loki. It doesn’t count for someone as harmless as Peter!”

Tony laughed as he gestured to your boyfriend who stood frozen like a deer in headlights. You expected the whole room to burst in the same hilarity, but what actually followed was almost worse. Heat bloomed in your cheeks as each of the present Avengers looked at you in disgust.

“Hey, you'd think he was hot too if you were 12!” you defended, though you felt silly.

“I, in fact, did not think Loki was attractive when I was 12.” Thor claimed, holding his proud mane of blonde hair high.

“You don’t count.” you glared at him.

“He literally almost took over New York and killed your dad?” Pepper recounted the events of the battle.

“I thought I could fix him,” you shrugged. “Still do actually…”

“Right, well moving on, if I had known you still thought those were the rules, we could’ve done this ages ago.” your father explained as if the information was a casual concept.

“Done what exactly?” you asked, requiring more explanation.

“You do realize this whole plan was to expose you and Peter right?” Natasha added.

And for what felt like the thousandth time in two minutes, your brain exploded from the new information.

“WHAT?”

“Well I wasn’t even that sure of it, I started to suspect it after I tried grabbing the Sorcerer’s Stone and literally all the Harry Potter movies were gone and I only know of one other person that considers them Christmas movies in this household.” your father eyed you as he explained it.

“Damnit.”

You really should’ve known. You totally had forgotten how similar you and your father were in that aspect. In many aspects really.

“So this whole time, everything with Operation Pair Parker, it was all so that Peter and I would confess?”

“Exactly. Though I must say, you had me convinced for a bit with the whole other partners thing. For a while at least.”

“I wasn’t convinced.” Bucky shrugged, crossing his metal arm over his chest.

“Yes you were,” Sam countered, calling him out. “You almost cried about it when you realized they might never be together.”

It was too much all too soon, but after a while you realized the whole plan of misdirection was equal in effort from you and your father as well as stemmed from the same intentions. A respect for the other and deep long running stubbornness. It forced you to crack a grin.

“So Peter and I were allowed to date this whole time?” you restated.

“Of course. In fact, I was surprised that you guys never dated in high school. It all makes sense now. Either that or Peter was gay.”

“What is up with people thinking im gay?!” Peter tried, but no one was paying attention to him.

“Thanks dad.”

“I am going to punish you for lying to me for so long though. You absolutely should've said something earlier.”

“That’s fair.” you muttered, gritting your teeth.

“Oh no it's not,” Pepper interjected. “C’mon Tony, it's the holidays! Can't we punish them later?”

“Fine, but I am going to make you expand your movie marathon to include the rest of us. Steve still has to check Harry Potter off his list.” your father required, reference the written list Captain America had been checking items off of ever since he had emerged from the ice.

“Yeah, as long as there’s a dog involved.” he agreed. You pictured Sirius Black in his dog form and nodded assuredly, omitting any of the tragedy that accompanied the name. You only nodded.

“Deal.”

And so your family date was rescheduled to the following night where instead of deception and stress, the space normally used for casual conferencing was transformed into a festive welcoming space. Snowflake decorations covered every corner of the ceiling and the chairs were arranged to all face a giant flat screen with loungers added around for you and the other Avengers to choose from.

Soon, the lot of you had settled down for the first few movies to kick off your marathon, sharing themed snacks and butterbeer from a recipe you had found online after your father declined importing the real beverage from Florida.

It was a better scenario than anything you could’ve imagined after revealing your relationship with Peter. Instead of drama and betrayal, there was light and laughter and just like always, Peter was right by your side in front of the others without a hint of bashfulness. You had just gotten to the third movie after spending the evening rewatching and finishing the first two.

“Which character was your crush when you were little?” you whispered to Peter, shifting closer to him in the oversized bean bag you two were sharing during the quidditch scene.

Peter sighed as he pondered all his options before landing on his final answer.

“Definitely Ginny.” he confirmed

“Good answer Parker.” you agreed, believing the girl was very similar to yourself. Or at least I’m a few ways.

“What was yours?” he returned the questioned, though you wouldn’t volunteer the information as easily.

“Guess.”

“Oh no,” Peter groaned as one particular person popped into his mind. “Don’t tell me you were a Draco sympathizer.”

“Don’t hate on his fan club,” you chided, remembering how strong of a chokehold Dracotok held over many in its active days, regardless if you felt bad for the pathetic blonde or not. “But no. I liked the twins.”

Peter chuckled as your answer made more sense than anything he had in mind.

“Which one?”

You opened your mouth, ready to respond, but your father beat you to it, his words sudden and unexpected.

“Fred,” he answered, popping a nerd gummy cluster into his mouth. “She’s got the Wattpad history to prove it.”

You turned in your seat to gawk at him as he offered the information to the whole room.

“You did not just say that.” Pepper scolded from beside him.

“How the hell do you have access to my Wattpad history?!”

Your father pulled out his tablet from seemingly nowhere and opened a tab that described every website you had accessed ever since you were an impressionable young teen.

“I have access to everything you did when you were little. I probably should’ve taught you about your digital footprint better.”

“Well anyways, he’s right.” you turned back to Peter, deciding not to bother with your fathers antics.

“But I’m nothing like them,” he whispered, careful to keep his voice low to prevent further eavesdropping. “Maybe you should make me taller and turn my hair red sometime.”

“You, Peter Parker, are everything I need you to be just the way you are. And I would take you over any of my fictional hallpasses anyday.”

You leaned in to nuzzle his nose with your own, sparring the hall from any intense PDA before your father spoke up again.

“That’s true. She still reads a lot of Spider-Man fics.”

“DAD!”

[aro-comics]

Aros In Relationships - Update Post

Oh god, everyone, it’s been SO long. I Just wanted to say (even if the bulk of my life updates soon here), that I’ve missed you all so so much, and I’m so glad I get to finally be able to share my work on these. It’s certainly been a long time coming.

But onto my personal note for this series - I’m really grateful that I’ve had the chance to transcribe their stories. Talking to these people, hearing their stories, their words … I can’t even describe how many times I couldn’t believe what I was hearing/reading, because everything they were saying felt so similar to something I would have said. I almost felt like they were reading out the thoughts and experiences in my own head!!

And I guess that’s why they call it a community – we do have a lot in common! But obviously, our experiences haven’t been identical on the romance front, and it was really nice to get to hear from other aromantic people about what this is like.

Image Descriptions:

Title Card: Cover Image. This Comic series is titled “Aromanticism and Romantic Relationships”. A subtitle underneath says that it is a collaborative sketch comic series. Four people are illustrated on the cover. On the far left is Arrow, a person with an undercut and wavy brown hair. Standing next to them is Lucien, who is wearing a hoodie and a collar with a pentagram charm. They have short brown hair and tan skin. Further to the right is Dot; she has pale skin with light freckles, long slightly curly brown hair in a high ponytail, and a grey hairband. On the very right is May, who has long curly brown hair, tan skin, and is wearing a maroon shirt with a striped dark jacket, and a necklace with a ring on it.

Slide 1: Celia  faces the reader, hand at the back of her neck. “Hey everyone – it’s been an eon (ok, like a year or so). I’ll explain more about where I’ve been on my tumblr, but for this series I thought I’d make an intro for what it’s all about.”

Slide 2: Celia continues,  “A while back, I was asked to make a comic about being in a romantic relationship as an aro person – Which, given the nature of my comics –I can’t really do, because I’ve never dated anyone.”

Slide 3: “Thankfully, some arospec people who had been in romantic relationships reached out – and were really kind in volunteering their time and personal stories to help me record their perspectives.” 

Celia sits at a table, typing away at her laptop while interviewing May. Celia says: “Wait – you too?” in surprise as she realizes she relates to the story May is telling her. They reply: “Yeah! And when…” as they continue their story. 

Slide 4: “And they’ve had *such* incredible patience for me these past two years I chipped away at these comics –” 

A scene from the two years it took to get this comic series out the door. This was during Celia’s completion of her university thesis project. She holds a draft in her hands, reading out to the participant that she calls on her phone, “On page 9, I wasn’t sure exactly what to draw… I could show the progress of what y’all did on the date?” 

They reply: “That works! The sketch is mostly accurate…”

In the background, references to upholstering a bench like padded chair, design sketches, and a poster with a map and circled possible apartment locations is depicted. 

Slides 5-6: The scene switches to a group shot with Celia and the participants. She stands with one hand on her hip and the other outstretched, gesturing to them. 

 “So, without further ado – please welcome May, Arrow, Dot, and Lucien!”

The four are sitting at a table with nameplates set in front of them. Arrow waves a hand at the reader, while Lucien has their arms folded and resting on the table. May and Dot both smile in a friendly manner at the reader. 

Celia continues, “You’ll be hearing from them over the course of this series – which I’ve adapted as long form comics like my “What is Love” comic over on my tumblr.”

Slide 7: “My process for these comics was highly collaborative. I worked together with these people as I wrote the script and drew the storyboard, because I want to be as authentic to their voices as possible. If they read a little different from my usual work – that’s because they are! And I hope you’ll enjoy getting the chance to hear from other Arospec folks' perspectives.”

Slide 7: “I’ll share each person’s comic with their cover page on Tumblr – the whole thing!” The cover page for May’s comic is shown, decorated with doodles of stars. It has the caption: “May – They/Them * Aro Demiace”

“And in parts with a collaborative IG account opened for each person’s comic.”

Also shown is a screenshot of an account named arosinrelationships_may. The description of the account reads: “May’s comics as part of @aro_comics series posted here”

Celia signs off on the note ‘See you soon!’ and a heart.

[absurdthirst]

Holding Back {Dave York x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 11.9k

Warnings: Virgin reader, mentions of unrequited feelings, mentions of sexual assault, college parties, mentions of virginity, finger, oral (female receiving), loss of virginity, mentions of cheating, public confrontations, broken engagement, mentions of past crimes (rape, abuse, murder) confession of love.

Comments: You've been in love with Dave York since you were a child. Growing up with him, you convince him to take your virginity in college, and he gives you one night. One night before he disappears for five years, only to show up at your engagement party. Not realizing his dark past haunts him and threatens to keep him from you.

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

**Follow @absurdthirst-writes and turn on notifications to stay up to date on all new fics.

|| MasterList || Dave York MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

You remember the day your older brother introduced you to his best friend Dave. You were sixteen and in high school. Dave and your brother were in college. He was older and you were in love from the moment you met him. His dark eyes were all you could think about every night and you knew your crush was one sided.

Dave would hang around the house with your brother, who was living at home to save money to put towards a car, and your stomach would explode with butterflies when Dave would come around. When you were seventeen, you and Dave were good friends, the natural progression from Dave always being at your home. You’d watch movies together, go out to eat. You felt like you were bored of high school, ready to get to college and be like them. Yet, you would remind yourself that you haven’t even been kissed. It’s embarrassing, never having a boyfriend while all your friends had dates to prom and all you could do was nurse your crush on Dave.

One night, your brother had gone to bed early, complaining about a headache, and Dave was watching tv with you, his arm thrown over the sofa behind you, and you turned to him. “Can you kiss me?” You ask and his eyes widen. 

“Wh-what?” He chokes and you sigh, “I- I’ve never been kissed. I just - I want you to be my first kiss.” It takes everything you have to ask him, knowing he could reject you and you’d be left with your crush and the embarrassment that he doesn’t want you. Why would he? You’re still in high school. You get lost in your mind while he stares at you in shock.

Dave seriously considers it, wanting to kiss you more than anything. He’s wanted to kiss you for a couple of years even though he knows it’s wrong. You’re too young for him, too innocent. Your brother would kill him. “Sweetheart-“ he frowns slightly and his eyes flicker down to your lips. “I’m too fucked up for you.” You don’t know his background, the broken home he comes from. Your brother hadn’t told you about his past. His father beat the shit out of him and his mother until he had defended himself at sixteen and ended up killing the bastard.

You frown, wondering what he means by that. You want to demand he tells you what he means, explain himself, and you are upset by his rejection but you knew you were kidding yourself about him. He doesn’t feel the same way. “You don’t have to come up with some shitty excuse, York. Just say you don’t wanna kiss me.” You scoff and shift to stand up, wanting to go cry into your pillow. “I’ll, uh, I’m gonna go to bed.” You rush out of the basement and up the stairs to your bedroom, collapsing on your bed to cry about Dave not wanting you.

Huffing, he watches you rush upstairs, wishing that he knew what to say. He’s not good. He knows that. Plus, he’s going to be going into the Marines soon. It would be stupid to start messing with you. You aren’t a one night stand and that’s pretty much all Dave has. You’re the type of woman you marry, have a family with. He sighs and lays back down on the sofa, wishing he could kiss you. He knows you would taste so sweet.

****

After that awkward night, you had tried to avoid Dave but you ended up settling back into your routine with your brother and his friend. Maybe less nights spent with Dave and more with your friends from school. You tried to forget about that night and managed to push it to the back of your mind. Eventually, you graduated high school and ended up in college just as Dave went into the military and your brother stayed for his masters degree. Dave decided that college wasn’t for him not long after that dreadful night where he rejected you, and he joined the Marines. He’s back now from deployment and when you see him at the college party, your heart pounds in your chest. It’s been about two years since you’ve seen him and he still makes your heart skip a beat. That night, your brother had met up with his girlfriend and asked Dave to drive you home, trusting him with your safety. You had only had a beer and you admired his profile as he drove you home. “You know, I’m surprised you didn’t go off with some random girl.” You chuckle, hating that your never ending crush on him makes you hate the girls whose faces you never got to see.

“You are my responsibility tonight.” Dave grunts, glancing over at you with a frown. “I wouldn’t leave you with those drunk fuckers. I’d kill them if something happened to you.” He growls, gripping the steering wheel tightly as he imagines what would happen. What could happen. He’s never liked some of the fuckers at that party and had made sure they steered clear of you. If he left, they might have tried to chat you up.

The protective growl makes your body shiver and he reaches for the AC, "are you cold?" You shake your head, leaning back in your seat to watch him drive. 

"I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." You say and he snorts. 

"I know you can but men...men can be monsters. You should never let your guard down at shitty parties." He orders and you smirk.

"Yes sir." You salute him and he wants to roll his eyes, knowing you are innocent to the dangerous ways of the world. He's seen too much already and he will be damned if he can't protect you as much as he can. "Not like any of them would want me. I'm - well, I'm not the hottest or most popular girl there. I- for fucks sake, I'm a virgin. Why would they want me?"

Dave grunts, his cock twitching when he hears you are completely untouched. He thought for sure that douchebag you had taken to your senior prom had fucked you. “Because you are a virgin.” He looks over at you for a long moment and watches the way you frown slightly at his comment. “Knowing they are the only one to touch you? To fuck a tight, virgin pussy? They wouldn’t care if you were conscious or not. Or if you wanted it.”

Your stomach twists at the very thought. “I- I guess I didn’t think of it like that.” You admit, biting your lip as you stare at him, his jaw is clenched and he’s gripping the steering wheel. You know the words coming from his mouth shouldn’t turn you on but to hear Dave speak so crudely has you clenching around nothing. “What if…what if you solved that problem?” You ask as Dave turns onto your street. 

“What do you mean?” Dave asks, wondering if you want him to kill those assholes. He probably would without hesitation, to keep you untouched. 

“What if you come into my room tonight and fuck me? I want you to take my virginity.” You tell him, heart pounding in your chest. You still have such a painful crush on him, and you know he’d take care of you.

“You’re drunk.” Dave grunts, even though he knows that you’ve only had one beer the entire time you were with him. It’s not alcohol saying that and his cock twitches at the thought of taking you to bed. You aren’t a high school girl anymore, you are an adult. Gorgeous and sexy in a wholesome kind of way. 

“You know I only had one beer.” You protest and he grips the steering wheel even tighter. 

“You want that?” He demands. “I can’t- if I did, it would be one night. Then you would have to get over this little crush you have on me.” He’s trying to protect you. To save you from the demons he has. He wouldn’t be good for you and knows it.

You are shocked, mortified that you haven’t hidden your crush from him, but then you remind yourself that you haven’t exactly been covert. You asked the man to kiss you for God’s sake. “I- one night.” You promise, “one night and that’s all I’ll ask of you.” You assure him, knowing that it won't be enough but it will have to be. You’ll have to live with the memory of having him but never actually having him. It will be one night.

He’s quiet for a minute, waiting for you to change your mind or tell him that he is joking. When you don’t, he swallows harshly. “Tell me now what you don’t want me to do to you.” He demands, knowing that he had very little experience with a virgin. No experience, really. He doesn’t want to make it something that you hate. “All of it. Every last detail.”

You lean towards him as he pulls up outside of the building you point out to him. “Wouldn’t it be easier to tell you everything I want you to do to me?” You tease with a smirk, trying to be more confident despite your stomach twisting with nerves. What if you aren’t good enough for him? 

“Be serious.” He orders and you nod, clearing your throat. 

“I don’t - I don’t want any- I don’t want to be choked. Or spanked. I am not sure if I like that stuff. I don’t want anal.” He snorts, as if he was gonna fuck your ass when you’ve never had sex before. “I don’t want you to be too rough with me.” You know he’s not soft, he never has been, but you hope he could make an exception for you.

Basic sex. He can do that. “I’m going to go down on you.” He decides, knowing that you need to be ready. “Finger you. Make sure you are ready because my dick is big.” He’s not trying to brag, but there have been plenty of girls who were sluts who had complained about taking him. “Are you on birth control?”

You nod, “yes. The pill. I take it for my heavy periods.” You tell him, your entire body already on fire as he kills the engine to his car and you fumble to take your keys out. Your apartment is shared but your roommates will be out still. “Dave.” You beg breathlessly, hand on the car door as you push it open, eager to get inside and have the man you’ve dreamed about since you were sixteen.

Grunting, Dave pushes the car door open. Aware that he is doing something that your brother would kill him for. “You tell me to stop.” He demands. “No matter how guilty you feel or how far we are into this.” He won’t touch you until you promise him that. His soul is stained beyond salvation already, but he won’t blacken it by betraying your trust. “I don’t care if I’m halfway finished - you say something.”

You nod and he reaches out to gently grip your chin as you turn towards him when he shuts the door. “Words, baby.” He orders and your mouth goes dry but you squeak out, “I- I understand.” You fumble with your keys until Dave takes them, opening the front door and he lets you in, his ears and eyes listening for anything as you turn the lights on.

It sounds like you have your place to yourself. “Go into your bedroom and get ready, baby.” Dave orders softly, knowing you might need a few minutes to get ready. “I’m going to get some water.”

You nod and rush into your bedroom, shutting the door behind you, and you start to freak out. This is Dave. Fucking. York. The man you’ve wanted for years and he’s going to fuck you, take your innocence. You inhale deeply, trying to calm down, and you clear your throat. Focusing on getting ready, you head into your bathroom to clean up, deciding to put on some lip balm, and you wonder if you should try and find the lingerie you bought on a whim a few months ago but you don’t get to change when Dave is knocking on the door. You check your appearance in the mirror and clear your throat, opening the door to see Dave standing there. “Hi.” You murmur, suddenly nervous, but you won’t change your mind.

He closes the door behind him, flicking the lock and closing the two of you into the space. “Hey.” You’re nervous, he can see that so he sets the glass of water down and kicks off his shoes. Reaching for his shirt to pull it up over his head and toss it aside. Smirking when your eyes widen at the sight of his broad shoulders and abs. It’s not like you haven’t seen him shirtless before but this is different. His dog tags come off, dropping them on your dresser and he steps towards you. “I expected you to be naked.” He chides playfully, his eyes dark. “You wanted me to undress you, baby?”

You swallow harshly, hands lifting and your fingers twitch with the urge to touch him. There’s a scar on his shoulder and you reach up to tentatively touch it. Dave’s eyes shut, allowing himself one moment to be affected by you, before he pushes that aside. “Come on baby.” He reaches for the hem of your shirt, hesitating for a moment but you nod, telling him to take it off. He does and your bra is nothing special, cotton and nothing overly sexy but the way Dave’s eyes darken make you feel like the sexiest woman alive.

“Hmmmm.” Dave slides his hands around you, leaning in to hover his lips over yours teasingly. “Always wanted to see these.” He hums, flicking your bra open and pulling back without kissing you to draw the straps down your arms. He wants you to beg him, need him to kiss you.

You lean in to try and press your lips to his but he won’t have it. You huff and he chuckles softly, leaning back to admire your tits and you swallow harshly, enjoying the way he licks his lips and your stomach twists, hoping he likes what he sees. “Dave.” You whimper, reaching up to cup your own tits, squeezing them.

“What do you want, baby girl?” Dave smirks at you, watching the way you waver between flustered virgin and horny. “You have to tell me.” His hands slide down your sides and back up, brushing his fingers under your breasts.

“I want you to touch me.” You let go of your breasts to reach for his hands, bringing them to your chest and you whimper when he eagerly cups your tits. “Dave.” You moan, “please don’t tease. I need you.”

Growling, his hands squeeze your tits, just to the point of hurting you before he eases up. Letting go of one to slide his hand around. Your back and drag you closer so he can kiss you. Pinching your nipple to make you gasp, Dave slides his tongue into your mouth with a moan of approval.

You grab onto his shoulders, loving how every pinch sends tingles down your spine. “Oh fuck, Dave.” You moan into his mouth, hands exploring his shoulders and back. His hands squeeze your tits until they slide down to your ass and he kisses down your neck, making you moan. “Oh God.” You pant when he takes your nipple into his mouth.

He chuckles and bites down on the hard tip, loving the way you shudder and moan for him. Your fingers run over his short, military haircut and he wishes that it was long enough for you to pull. He soothes your nipple with his tongue and then bites it again, wanting it to be tender and for you to want more by the time he’s done.

It’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before, his mouth on your breast, and he switches over to the other, offering it the same attention to make you moan his name. “Oh God. I need-” You are breathless and dripping in your cotton panties, needing more from the man bending over you. “Need more.”

He pulls off your breast with a satisfied pop and smirks up at you. “Good girl.” He purrs, squeezing your ass. “Take off your jeans and lay down on your bed. I want to see how wet you are.”

You pull back, nodding as you reach for the button on your jeans and you shove them down along with your panties. You’re bare before him and his dark eyes trail along your body but you feel empowered by it. You shift to lay down, inhaling deeply before you spread your legs to display how wet you are. Your body already feels like it’s on fire and you are struggling to breathe, wanting him so much it hurts.

“Fuck.” Dave huffs, his cock twitching in his jeans and he has to reach down to palm himself. Adjusting before he flicks the button open for a little relief. “I shouldn’t touch you.” He admits, staring at your cunt hungrily. “But I’m going to. I’m going to put my filthy hands on you and take your innocence.”

His words make you whimper, knowing that this is somewhat wrong. He’s your brother’s best friend. “Please baby.” You beg and he kneels on the bed, eyes devouring your cunt like it’s his last meal on earth. You watch him until he surges forward to slide his tongue through your folds. No fanfare, it’s dirty enough to make you squeal and your thighs close around his head until he’s pushing them back, forcing you open for his hungry mouth.

Dave doesn’t stop, groaning at the taste of your sweet pussy. Keeping your thighs pushed back so he can flick his tongue over your clit before he slides down to push his tongue inside your soaked walls, wanting you to scream his name in pleasure before he fills you with his cock.

You gasp at the sensation, so foreign yet so damn good. “Oh shit.” You whimper, reaching down to push on his head. Instinct driving you to demand more from him. “Oh fuck Dave. More.” You plead and you moan when his nose pushes against your clit. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt before and you’re addicted to it, to him.

He would pull away, tease you for being so damn greedy but he can’t. Not when you are trying to roll your hips down and chase your pleasure. He groans, moving one hand so he can flick his tongue over your clit while sinking a finger into your tight, virgin cunt.

It’s an odd sensation but enjoyable, his finger pushing inside of you and you rock your hips up into his mouth, never seeming to get enough. “Oh fuck, Dave.” You pant when he pushes another finger inside of you, stretching you and it stings a little but you like it. His tongue flicks over your clit again and again and you are soon lost as you clamp down on his fingers, a moan escaping your lips as you cum.

He can feel how wet you get. The rush of heat over his fingers makes him groan happily. Feeling them squelch as he sucks your clit into his mouth to overstimulate you. Your hips jerk up and you gasp out his name as he sucks. Blindly pushing at his head when it’s too much for you and he finally lets go with one last flick of his tongue as he scissors his fingers and pushes a third finger in.

He’s stretching you out and pulling you apart, making you whimper at how good it feels to have him like this. His fingers push deeper inside of you with each pump of his wrist and your hands scramble to find a grip on the sheets. “Dave. Shit.” You cry when his thumb presses against your clit, changing the angle.

“Good girl.” Dave growls out, turning his head and nipping your thighs with his teeth. “You’re gonna cum for me again. Not gonna fuck you until you do. Until you can take every inch of my cock. Then I’ll take your virginity, baby girl.” He feels the way you clench down around him when he talks to you, figuring that you like his voice. He is a harsh man in a lot of ways, but he wants this to be something you never forget and look back on with a fondness that lasts.

His words combined with his voice has you thrashing and he throws his arm over your waist, wanting to keep you still. “Dave. Dave. Dave.” You pant, knowing you’ll never feel like this again after tonight has your heart clenching. One night only then you’ll move on. “Oh shit.” You hiss in pleasure when he curls his finger and it doesn’t take long for him to pull you apart piece by piece until you’re clamping down on his digits once again.

Dave groans when you come apart for him again. Knowing that in just a minute he will be sliding inside you again. He can’t tell you how many times he has jerked off thinking about you. Wanting you. He can’t have you. Because of your brother, his own past. But he can have this. He can be the only one who can claim that he is your first. Kissing your hip while he feels you cum, having you melt into a puddle. “Good girl. Such a good girl for me.” 

“Your good girl.” You murmur, lost in the haze of your orgasm. It’s insane how good you feel, nothing from your own hand has ever felt like this. Dave shuffles off of the bed after he withdraws his fingers, sucking on them while he works on pushing down his pants with one hand. When his fingers are clean, he shoves them down along with his briefs and your eyes widen as you sit up to see his cock. “Wow. I- Wow. I see what you mean.” You murmur, knowing he would have hurt you if he had fucked you without foreplay.

Smirking at you, Dave wraps his hand around his cock and slowly pumps it. He’s been hard since you first mentioned taking your virginity and he smears the precum around the tip. “You want me to wear a condom baby?” He asks seriously. He doesn’t care if you are on birth control, he wants you to be comfortable with the protection you have. “I- it’s been awhile since I’ve fucked anyone and my last test came back clean. But I don’t care. If you want me to get a rubber…” he has one in his wallet.

You shake your head, knowing you’re only going to get this one time with Dave and you want to experience everything you can. “No condom. I- I’m strict with my birth control. I promise.” He nods, pumping his cock for another moment until he’s kneeling on the bed and you reach out to wrap your fingers around him. “Dave.” You whisper, feeling how velvety and hard he is.

“Fuck.” Dave grunts, enjoying the feeling of your hand around him. You aren’t squeezing him hard enough but your innocence makes him twitch. “Lean back baby.” After a minute of you slowly stroking him, he can’t take it anymore. Betting your hand away so he can shuffle closer and nudge the head of his cock against your soaked entrance. “Ready, baby girl?”

You exhale shakily, nervous, but you nod. “Yes. I’m ready.” You promise and he starts to push inside of you. It’s a strange feeling but not painful, you watch him as he pushes deeper, slowly rocking his hips to work you open and his jaw is clenching. You slide your hands down his chest, resting your palm over his heart, enjoying the way it pounds under your touch.

“Fuck.” He hisses, wanting to close his eyes and savor the feeling of your hot, tight walls wrapping around him. But he can’t. Not when he gets to watch your face. See the changes as he finally pushes deep and is embedded completely inside you. So deep that he doesn’t know if he could ever pull out. “Fuck, baby girl. Feel so good.”

You caress his chest, adjusting to him, and you whimper when he twitches inside of you. “Dave. You- you feel so big inside of me.” He’s stretching you out and you are certain you have never felt so complete. It’s like this is meant to be. “I- oh baby. I want you to move.”

Dave grunts, leaning in and pressing his lips to yours while he slides his arms under your back. He’s going to move slowly to start, giving you the friction you need and still giving you more time to adjust. “So fucking tight.” He huffs against your lips.

You lift your legs up onto his hips, sending him impossibly deeper inside of you. “Fuck. Oh shit.” You pant, tossing your head back and he eagerly kisses down your neck. Your hands caress his shoulders and back, nails scratching when he hits something deep inside of you.

Chuckling breathlessly, Dave concentrates on pulling you apart. Deep, measured thrusts tailored to make sure that you feel every inch of him inside you. Loving the way that your cunt squeezes him. “Love it, don’t you?” He grunts out, nipping your chin before kissing your lips again.

You sigh into his mouth, wanting to confess that you love him but you can’t ruin this. He will pull away and you couldn’t take that right now. “Love it. So much.” You pant when his fingers find your clit, and your walls flutter around him. “Shit. That - oh God that’s good.”

Dave groans, rocking his hips as he rubs your clit. Wanting to feel you cum around him. This is his only chance to touch you and he wants it. Wants you to cum so he can change positions. Put your legs up on his shoulders and destroy you. Then put you on your knees and make you scream his name. Take you all the ways that he imagined fucking you for when you stay away from him. 

“Fuck. Oh yes. Yes. Just like that, baby.” You pant, eyes closing as the pressure builds inside of you. It takes a few more rocks of his hips and you’re falling apart. “Fuck.” You moan, eyes rolling into the back of your head as you clamp down on his cock, soaking him with your cum.

“Shit, shit.” Dave has to stop moving, too close to blowing his load when you start to cum. Holding himself deep inside you while he rubs your clit and feels your cunt fluttering around him. “Jesus, baby, you’re so fucking good.” He praises, watching your face while you ride out your first orgasm on a cock, his cock. “You’re going to be so fucking tired when I’m done with you.” He promises. 

You already feel dazed, offering him a lazy smile, and you caress his chest. “Fuck. I want more.” You chuckle breathlessly, already craving more of him and you know that this time won’t be enough but it will have to last you a lifetime without the man you love. “More.” You demand, squeezing him with your walls.

He hums, sliding his hands down to your legs and starts to lift them up onto his shoulders. Turning his head to bite one of your calves before he folds you over and presses them back towards your head. “Tell me if it’s too much.” He cautions you, knowing that he will want to fuck you harder than he had been for your first orgasm. Pulling his hips back and plunging back into your tight cunt with a harsh snap of his hips down. 

You practically scream, the new angle makes him feel even bigger and you cling to his forearms. “Oh shit!” You squeal, cunt squelching as he starts to push deep inside of you. “Fuck! Baby!” You throw your head back, nails digging into his arms and you whimper at the feel of him inside of you.

Dave grits his teeth, hissing as he fucks you. Harder and faster than before, every thrust is designed to make you squeal. Making sure you will remember the night that he fucked you. He feels your walls clench around him as he holds your legs and pushes them down even more. “Fuck, so good for me. Letting me fuck you like this.”

Each thrust has you falling apart at the seams, whines and squeals escaping your lips as you become completely entrapped by him. “Fuck. Dave! Dave!” You scream, cunt dripping onto your sheets until he pushes your legs back just a tiny bit more and hits something that makes you shake. It’s devastating and each thrust makes you feel like you’re about to pee. When your orgasm hits, it destroys you, stars flashing in your eyes as you soak him with a torrent of your cum.

The way you soak him makes him shudder. Stomach clenching and your thighs shake next to his head. The way you cry out his name sticks while him, searing into his brain and he knows it will be a sound he never forgets. Dave hisses as he pulls back looking down at where you drip down his stomach and pelvis, soaking your bed underneath your ass. “Fucking shit.” He smirks, pulling out of you and reaching down to flip you over. “One more and then I’ll cum.” 

You’re already exhausted, unsure of if you could handle another orgasm, but then you remind yourself that tonight is the only time you’ll have Dave like this. Your body shakes as he pulls you back onto your knees and you fall forward onto your elbows, ass in the air, and you gasp when he swats it. “Oh. I- I like that.” You admit, knowing you told him you weren’t sure if you wanted to be spanked but the feel of his hand on your ass makes you shiver with delight. “Do- do it again.” You request, looking over your shoulder at him.

Smirking, Dave’s hand connects with your ass and he puts a little more force behind it. “You are fucking filthy.” He mocks you, slapping your ass again before you can even beg for another one after he hears you cry out. “Such a little slut.” He knows you aren’t a slut, you have only had one man. Him. His cock slides back into you and he groans as he slaps your ass once more, enjoying that your ass has his raised handprints on the globes.

You gasp as he pushes deep and his hand comes down on your ass again. “Fuck! Dave!” You cry, fingers curling into your sheets as he starts to fuck you hard and fast. It has you gasping for air as he knocks the breath out of you but it’s so good. Sweat beads on your forehead and you moan when his hands squeeze your ass, using it as leverage to thrust harder. “Oh. Oh. Ohhh.” You warble, losing your ability to think at this stage, only able to feel him inside of you.

This position is for him. Watching your ass bounce as his cock plunges into you. Rocking your hips back as he pushes forward. Fucking you exactly like he has wanted to. “Fuck.” He groans your name, speeding up his thrusts until he can barely do more than grunt. 

You can't do anything but let him fuck you. Your body almost vibrates from each thrust into you and you rest your cheek on the sheets. "Fuck." You squeak, reaching beneath you to try and rub your clit. You want to cum again, feeling it build up inside of you.

He knows that he will leave bruises under your skin. He wants to leave them. Wants you to feel him long after he’s done with you. Remind you that he was inside you, that he had touched you. He watches the way your hand sinks between your thighs and you start to rub your clit. “Greedy.” He grunts, smirking at the way you are chasing your pleasure. 

You know you'll think of this long after he's gone, will possibly feel him for days, and you want to savor every moment of pleasure you can take from him. You reach behind you to grab his hand from your hip, bringing it to your clit. "Yes I am." You want him to take over, to completely own your body, possess it until he leaves your bed.

Dave chuckles, making sure that his hips slap against your ass. His fingers circle your clit, rubbing the bundle of nerves to make you squeeze him like a vice. Enjoying how fucking tight you get when your cunt flutters. If he was the type of man to keep someone, he would keep you. Just like this. Around his cock all day, every day. 

“Oh shit, Dave. Baby. I’m gonna - you’re gonna make me- oh. Oh fuck!” Your voice cracks as you cum once again. Your body almost protests it but it can’t deny Dave as you clamp down on his cock, soaking him. You collapse forward, unable to remain on your knees as your body shakes against the mattress.

Following you down to the bed, Dave doesn’t stop fucking into you. Grinding his cock deep and reaching up and wrapping his hand around your shoulders to pull your head back. When your head turns, he presses his lips to your messily. Grunting and groaning as he fucks into you just five or six more thrusts before he buries his cock deep and starts to fill you. Painting your walls with hot spurts of cum. 

You moan into his mouth, reaching back to grab his neck to push his mouth harder against yours while he rides out his orgasm. His cock twitches inside of you for several long moments before he stops, kissing you with his tongue sliding against yours. When he pulls back, you slump down to the bed. “Holy fuck.” You smile, absolutely exhausted. You’re not sure if you could move.

His hand caresses your hip gently as he chuckles. Pulling out of you to watch his cum well up and slide down your lips as your cunt flutters and pushes him out. “Now, you aren’t a virgin.” He grunts proudly. “Stay here. I’ll get a rag.” He shuffles off the bed and pads towards the door. Looking back at you slumped down on your bed and smirking at the way he wrecked you. No way you wouldn’t forget this. 

You let him clean you up and you aren’t sure what you expected. Maybe for him to get in the bed beside you but he grabs you some water and a snack from the kitchen before he starts to dress. “You don’t want to stay?” You ask, knowing you’re pushing him but you don’t want this night to be over yet.

“You know I can’t stay.” He glances over at you as he pulls his pants up and tucks his cock away. If he stayed, you would hope that this could turn into something more. He knows that you have more than a crush on him, you think that you are in love with him, but you aren’t. You can’t be. Not if you know what he is. Reaching for his shirt to put on. “Watch your drinks, make sure you keep your fucking taser on you.” Dave instructs you. “Tase them in the fucking balls if they don’t take no for an answer.” He knows he will be deploying soon and he wants you to listen to his advice. “Only fuck someone if you want to.” 

You nod, watching him as your heart breaks. He doesn’t feel the same way and it’s obvious. You promised him you’d move on and you’ll try. You’ll try to forget about him but you know no one will ever be able to compare, no one will make you feel like he has tonight. You shift to sit up, uncaring of being naked as he finishes dressing. You stand on shaky legs and he reaches out to steady you. You reach up to cup his cheek, “I know you could only give me tonight and I promise I’ll try to move on but I want you to know I love you. It’s always been you, Dave. Be safe. Please.” You beg, eyes burning into his.

You collapse against him and his arm wraps around your waist, keeping you close, and you whimper at the way he’s kissing you like you’re the only thing in his world. It makes your heart pound and break at the same time, knowing you can’t be together. It’s too complicated. You let him kiss you for as long as he allows until he’s pulling back, placing a soft kiss on your forehead. “I’ll see you around, sweetheart.” He promises and you nod, tears stinging in your eyes as he reaches for his car keys.

****

It’s been five years since he’s seen you. Five years of glancing at your social media to see what you have been up to since he had gone dark. Deploying three times within a year just so he wouldn’t be tempted to come back to see you. The only reason he is here now is because of what this is. Your brother inviting him to your engagement party. Some asshole that you had apparently moved on to. He was happy for you, but fuck if he isn’t jealous. Keeping the memory of you with him as he had moved from the military to the private sector. Nearly dying two years ago when a mission went south, he had left the military and joined the DIA. No excuse not to come to this party to celebrate your upcoming marriage. Adjusting his tie, Dave opens the door and steps inside the venue, looking around for you or your brother. 

You are talking to your future mother-in-law when you look across the room and see him. It’s been five years and you still feel breathless when you see him. Heart lurching and you swear it’s like you’re back in college, like no time has passed. You excuse yourself from your future mother-in-law, about to make your way across the room, when your hand is taken by Matthew. Your fiancé. He’s sweet, predictable, and safe. Everything Dave isn’t. He has these beautiful blue eyes and you know he could make you happy, that’s why you accepted his proposal, knowing that Dave hasn’t ever come back into your life…until now. That night, the night he took your virginity. You hate him for it. No one else has compared. No one has ever made you feel like that. Sure, you’ve had more partners since that night until you met Matthew, but you only orgasm remembering the way Dave wrecked you. Matt is sweet, always going down on you and he tries to help you finish with toys but it’s not the soul consuming orgasms you had with Dave. 

“Hey baby.” You greet Matt who has been circling the room and he leans in to kiss your cheek while your brother finds Dave. 

“Hey man. Fuck, you’re actually here. Thought you’d have some work bullshit to deal with and bail at the last minute.” He greets his best friend while Matt guides you over to his boss, wanting to introduce you.

“Nah, I made time for this.” Dave keeps his eyes on you as you move towards him. Smirking slightly when he realizes that this is who you are marrying. One of his dopey analysts. Matthew Tate was as boring as his name sounded, the proverbial nice guy who seemed to actually believe that he is saving the world. He straightens slightly, his eyes narrowing on where Matthew’s arm is around your waist and he nearly snorts. If it were him, he would have his hand on your ass. “Tate.” he greets the man, reaching out and shaking his hand with a slightly overpowering grip. “Hell of a party.” 

“Thanks sir. My girl has always wanted something classy so you know how it goes, happy wife, happy life.” He winks at you, “well, soon. We are trying to figure out the wedding date.” Matt says, squeezing your waist with his other hand that isn’t on fire from Dave’s ridiculously tight handshake. You are shocked. Matt had mentioned his boss David but you never put two and two together. Of course, your fiancé works for the man who ruined you five years ago. You want to scream and cry but instead, you step towards Dave. “It’s so good to see you again.” You say as you recover, needing to play your part, and you lean in to kiss Dave on the cheek, “I didn’t know you and Matt worked together.”

Dave hums, wrapping his arms around you tightly for a hug and is pleased to find that you still fit perfectly. Your smell has changed, become more sophisticated than the berry blast body spray you had worn in college but the elegant floral notes of your perfume suit  you. “Hello sweetheart.” He murmurs softly, catching the confusion on Matthew’s face. He eases back from you and gives your fiancé a small shrug. “I grew up with her brother.” He reaches out and slaps your brother on the back. “Small world.” 

Matt nods, “ah, that’s a coincidence.” He smiles and pulls you back into his side, making you stiffen a little. You love Matt, he’s a good person, but you’re not in love with him. Seeing Dave is hard, he’s even more handsome now he’s aged a little and you hate that your stomach twists with attraction. You’re at your engagement party, you shouldn’t feel like this. You love Matt, you internally remind yourself. You sigh and reach for Matt’s hand. 

“We should go speak to my parents.” You say and Matt nods, letting you guide him through the crowd. 

Your brother looks back towards Dave, “he’s a good guy, right?” He asks his friend, unaware of the tension between his best friend and his sister.

“He’s fine.” Dave grunts, propping his hands on his hips as you hug your mother. His eyes stay on you, sliding up and down your figure. “Boring and predictable. Not an operator.” Your brother knows what Dave has done, it was another reason why he would never approve if he knew that Dave had touched his little sister. He would try to beat the shit out of Dave. “He doesn’t do more than sit behind a desk and give me information that I already know.” 

Your brother snorts, “yeah. He’s a bit of a pussy but that’s not a bad thing. He’s safe, stable, secure. Good for her.” He says and Dave swallows, knowing he’s none of those things. You try to avoid Dave as long as possible, introducing Matt to your friends and meeting his, you spend the evening smiling despite not truly being happy. 

You finally have enough and need a break. You exhale when you enter the bathroom, looking in the mirror, and you hate that you are miserable. Matt doesn’t make you feel like you’re on fire. Dave did that with a fucking hug. You shake your head, trying to push him out of your mind when the door opens and you look up to see Dave entering the bathroom. “Mens is next door.” You sigh, not turning to face him.

“Don’t need to take a piss.” Dave smirks as he leans against the sink and watches you check your reflection in the mirror. Reaching up to smudge a bit of your mascara that has run and Dave hates the fucking lipstick on your lips. Knowing that he can’t kiss you without it showing. “So you’re going to marry this asshole?” He asks, crossing his arms over his chest. “Really? Out of everyone you could have had? Could still have?”

You sigh, turning to face him. "Why are you here? It's been five years and you haven't even sent me a damn text. I didn't invite you here, Dave. I- shit - Matt is...he's predictable. Sure, it's boring but he's safe and I - I haven't - I couldn't move on. That night still haunts me and I hate you for that. I hate that I compare every man I meet to you. I hate that none of them are you. We aren't - it won't happen between us, so just let me be as happy as I can considering the fact that I am still fucking in love with you. Just - please. Leave me alone." You plead, closing your eyes as your heart clenches in pain.

It’s wrong the way that his heart leaps at your confession. He should want you to move on, encourage it. But he’s greedy. He loves knowing that he’s infected you the same way you have him. He won’t lie and say he’s never slept with anyone since that night, you wouldn’t believe that. However, no one has stayed in his mind like you have. Reaching over, Dave grabs your chin and holds your face while reaching for one of the napkins in the little basket next to the sink. Wanting to wipe off that lipstick so he can kiss you. “I’ll never leave you alone.” He growls softly.

You’re frozen while he wipes your lipstick off and tosses the napkin into the trash can. “You did. You left for five years. Told me to move on.” You growl, swatting his hand away. “Don’t - I’m not a stupid girl anymore. I don’t need you to kiss me and then send me back out there to be with Matt. I can’t do that to him. Dave. Please. Just go.” You beg, knowing your control is slipping, especially when he reaches for your waist to drag you against him. “Please.” You whimper pathetically, knowing you’ve lost the battle.

“Shut up.” Dave huffs, knowing that he should walk away. Leave you with your conscience intact and your pride but he’s jealous. Hates the idea of that boring fuck touching you. Not making you cum. He decides that he won’t kiss you after all. Turning you around, his hands come up to pull your dress down, exposing your tits to his view in the mirror before he slides a hand up your dress. “When was the last time he made you cum so hard your legs gave out?” He demands as he slides his hand into your lace panties and finds your cunt waxed, making him growl jealously. “Fuck. This for him?”

You already look wrecked as you watch yourself in the mirror, having let him pull your tits out of the pretty dress you’d picked out for tonight and his fingers caressing your mound. You smirk, giggling softly to taunt him, “yeah. For Matt. He loves it.” You tease Dave, knowing it will rile him up. “Makes him wanna go down on me. Won’t do it otherwise.” You confess with a huff, leaning your head on his shoulder so you can feel all of him against you.

“Pussy.” Dave grunts, sneering at the idea of not wanting to go down on you. He’s fucking dreamed of the way you taste, the way you respond to his tongue. He pulls his hand away to shove your panties down, wanting you to see him touch you as he pinches your nipple. “Fuck baby, you still look so goddamn pretty.” He huffs, hard cock twitching against your ass.

You shouldn’t let him do this. It’s wrong. It’s cheating on Matt. Yet one look in those dark eyes meeting yours in the mirror has you throwing away every moral you have. Your soul is blackened by Dave York from the moment you saw him in the events room and you know you won’t be able to move on. “Dave.” You whimper, needing him to touch you after you’ve dreamed of it for five fucking years. “Please.” You beg pathetically. 

When his fingers find your clit, you moan and he covers your mouth with his hand. “Can’t let anyone know, baby girl.” He says and your moans are muffled in his palm as his fingers work your clit.

Dave pants in your ear, watching as your eyes roll back every time his fingers circle your clit. Loving how you are pushing back against his cock and moaning into his palm. Your slick pours out of your cunt, making it slippery and his wrist twists, pressing his thumb against your nerves so he can slide two fingers deep into your pussy. Making you gasp out and he wonders how often your Matt finger fucked you stupid like you need to be. “That’s it, baby girl. So wrecked for me.” He coos in your ear quietly. “Anyone could walk in and see you getting fingered right now, you know that?” 

You know the news that he didn’t lock the door should make you shove him away and forget this happened, but it only turns you on more. To have someone see you and Dave, for it to be reality outside of the two of you, has your walls fluttering around his digits. “Oh. Dirty girl likes that.” He chuckles softly and you whimper, nodding as he lowers his hand from your mouth so he can squeeze your breast. 

“Dave.” You pant, trying to grind back against him.

“I know.” His cock is throbbing against your ass as he works his fingers up into you faster. Watching your pants and feeling your body start to tremble from his touch. “Every time I jerk off, I think about that night.” He confesses quietly, his dark eyes meeting yours in the mirror. “Think about how you felt around me. How you sounded as I took your virginity.” 

His words make you clench around his fingers, knowing that he jerks off thinking about that night nearly sends you over the edge, his fingers curling deeper. "Oh shit. Me - me too. Think about it when - when Matt is fucking me." You confess shamelessly, uncaring of anything right now other than the way Dave is making you feel. "Please baby. I need - oh God." You whine when you start to cum around his digits.

“Yesssss.” Dave hisses, tightening his hold on you and curling his fingers deeper. Loving how you soak his fingers and grip them tight. “That’s it, baby girl.” He keeps his thumb pressed against your clit while your hips jerk and your legs threaten to give out under you. His body is the only thing keeping you upright while you ride out your intense orgasm. He kisses your jaw and ear. “Good girl.” 

You pant, loving how good you feel. The most intense orgasm since he fucked you that night he took your virginity. You turn your head to press your lips to his, "I love you. I still fucking love you." You whine, wanting him to know how you feel. That Matt could never compare.

Groaning into your mouth, Dave pulls his fingers out of your cunt and starts to pull your panties back up into place. Knowing he has to let you go back out there. You love him, and he loves you but you are engaged to Matt. He’s at your engagement party for Christ’s sake. “I love you.” He whispers hoarsely. “Always have. That was never the problem.” He starts to pull you top back into place with another soft kiss before he reluctantly lets you go. 

“Dave.” You frown when he steps away from you. “I can’t - I don’t understand. You just - we just - you can’t just walk away again.” You shove his chest, “I just cheated on my fiancé and I can’t marry him. I don’t- oh God. I feel sick.” You choke, knowing that you’ve ruined everything for Dave. He’s never going to love you the way you want him to. He’s never going to want to get married and have kids.

“You deserve better than me, baby girl.” Dave closes his eyes and shakes his head. Guilty for making you feel bad, but he doesn’t regret touching you. He’s never going to regret touching you. “I’ve done too many bad things, I’m not the man you think that I am.” He wants you to understand this. To know that his soul is tarnished. 

You shake your head, cupping his cheeks. “I know you Dave. I know you.” You promise, knowing he’s done bad things. You assumed it since he’s been in a secretive branch of the military. “I need to - I need to tell Matt. Maybe he will forgive me.” You choke, lowering your hands, when Dave doesn’t say anything. You know this is just a game to him, to make you react to him before he walks away for the umpteenth time.

Dave weighs his options, knowing that if he tries to walk away from you, he will lose you forever. “You aren’t asking for forgiveness for shit.” He grunts, reaching out and grabs your wrist to pull you closer again. “You aren’t going to be sorry for this. You didn’t do anything. I did. I touched you. And I’m not fucking sorry.” He spits right before he crushes his lips to yours. 

You melt against him, unable to stop yourself, and you tangle your fingers in his hair. No longer the required length for the military, it’s just the right length for you to tangle your fingers in. His tongue slides against yours and he crowds you against the bathroom counter, his hands sliding down your dress and you finally come back to yourself. Swatting his hands away, “stop. Stop. I- I need to- God. I-” You surge forward to press your lips to his, addicted to him now you have had your second taste of him.

He smirks against your lips, letting you take charge of the kiss this one time. Wanting to feel how you want to touch him. Enjoying the way that you slide your tongue against his until he gently pushes you away. Reaching up and smoothing your hair back. “What do you need, baby?” He asks, like he hasn’t just been affected by the kiss.

“I don’t know.” You admit breathlessly. “I- I love Matt, I do.” Your words make him frown, “I do. He’s a good guy. But he’s not you. You do this - God, how do you do this to me?” You laugh humorlessly as you step back from him. “I’m so fucking in love with you but you hold the power to destroy me. Dave…I need you to tell me what you want from me.”

“I want you to take off that piece of shit ring and give it back to Tate.” He growls, stepping forward to reclaim the space between you. “I want you to come home with me tonight. Every fucking night. I want to tell you who I am, what I’ve done and not realize that you will leave me for it.” He hates how vulnerable he sounds, but it’s the truth. He knows you would leave him if you know what he’s done.

You frown, wondering what he means by that. You know you’ve already signed your fate away for him. You’ve always been his. Your hands come up to rest on his chest, feeling how fast his heart is beating, the only give away to his nerves on his otherwise steely face. “I don’t know what you’ve done but I know you. I love you, the good and the bad. I can’t - I need to speak to Matt.” You tell him, knowing you can’t spend anymore time in this bathroom. You have to go out and face your fate. “If you want me, I’m yours.” You promise, sliding your hands down his chest until you can fiddle with the ring on your finger. “Wait for me.” You beg, knowing you’ll need to make a swift exit. With one last look at Dave after you open the door, you find Matt in the crowd. 

“Can I speak to you?” You ask and he nods, wrapping his arm around your waist. 

“Of course baby.” You take his hand from your waist and guide him towards the private room in the event hall where the purses and coats are kept. 

“I- I can’t do this. I’m so sorry. I can’t marry you.” You tell him and his eyes widen. 

“Why? Baby, don’t be silly. It’s just nerves.” 

You shake your head, “no. I - I don’t - I love you but I’m not in love with you. I’m not enough for you. I can’t give you everything. I- I’m so sorry. You deserve a good girl. Someone who will love you and won’t always be wondering what if with someone else.” 

Matt’s eyes narrow in confusion. “Is there someone else?” He accuses you and you nod. 

“I shouldn’t have accepted your proposal knowing I could never give you my whole heart. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” You plead, sliding the ring off of your finger to place it in his hand.

Dave stands next to the door, having already collected your purse and coat from that room. Listening just in case Matt decides to surprise him and make a scene. “Who is it?” Matt demands, sounding like he is about to cry. “Have you been cheating on me?” Dave knows you feel guilty but you shouldn’t. “It doesn’t matter. You - you know how much I love you. This can still work.” He begs softly. “Please don’t do this. You just have jitters.”

“I’m sorry.” You step back from him, tears stinging in your eyes. “It’s not jitters. It’s - I - I promise you I didn’t cheat on you.” You lie, knowing you will lose sleep over that but it’s easier to be kind. “Be happy.” You plead, leaning up to kiss his cheek and he shakes his head, “I don’t understand.” 

You glance around for your coat and purse but realize it’s missing. Dave must’ve gotten it. You open the door to find Dave waiting there and you swallow harshly as Matt comes to stand behind you.

There’s one thing about Matthew Tate, and it’s that he’s not stupid. He analyzes intelligence for a living. His eyes widen when he sees Dave standing there. “So that’s what it is?” He swallows harshly and shakes his head. “You’re ending what we have for a man who kills people?” In his distraught state, Matthew doesn’t care about things like classified information. He grabs your arm to keep you from walking away. “You really want to sleep next to him?” He demands. “A man who beat his own father to death when he was a teenager? Had to get a waiver to get into the military because of that?”

You glance back at Dave, knowing you have so many questions, but you can’t marry Matt now. Even if Dave has withheld his past from you. “It doesn’t matter. I- I can’t marry you. I’m sorry.” You pull out of his grip and everyone is noticing now, wondering what is happening. 

“Fine.” Matt snorts, “don’t come back to me when you realize you’re with a monster.” Matt has read the reports, knows how violent Dave is. “You’ll be one of his victims in one way or another.” Matt warns and you step back towards Dave. Your brother is confused, stepping forward to see what the situation is. “Oh, it’s your brother. Does he know that you’ve been fucking his best friend?” Matt chuckles sharply.

Your brother chuckles humorlessly and shakes his head. “You’re wrong about that, Matt.” He snorts. “Dave looks at her like his own sister.” Turning towards his friend, he is expecting him to laugh with him, fully aware of Dave’s exploits when they were younger but he just stares back at him. The smile on your brother's face dies and is replaced with a frown. “Dave- you didn’t.” He growls, face starting to twist in fury. “Tell me you didn’t fucking touch my sister!” He hisses, reaching out and grabbing Dave’s jacket. Dave won’t fight back. He won’t raise a fist to your brother because he deserves this. He’s deserved it for five years so he doesn’t even try to defend himself when your brother draws his fist back and slams it into Dave’s jaw.

“Stop! Stop!” You grab your brother’s arm to stop him from punching Dave. “It wasn’t him! It was years ago. I asked him. Shit. Just don’t punch him. I asked him to fuck me.” You don’t mention that Dave took your virginity because your brother would definitely punch him. God, this night has become a disaster. Your darkest secrets exposed in front of your nearest and dearest. “Please. I want to go.” You beg your brother, “don’t hurt him. I- I love him. I’m in love with him.”

“You fucker!” Your brother hisses at Dave, shoving him away from him. “I trusted you to look after her!” 

Dave rubs his jaw and shakes his head slightly. “I’m not going to hit you back.” He growls, glaring at him, “because you’ve been my best friend for nearly twenty years. She made up her mind herself. I didn’t try to take advantage of her.”

Your brother shakes his head, “I can’t fucking believe you. I told you to stay away from her.” 

You know everyone can hear what’s happening and you are mortified, but also know that you can’t change it now. “I love him. Please don’t make me lose him again.” You plead with your brother, your mother watching in shock. 

Your brother scoffs, “you have no idea who he is. I was trying to protect you.” He shakes his head and waves his hand. “Get her out of here.” He orders Dave, not wanting to see you or Dave right now.

Nodding, Dave wraps his arm around your waist and starts to guide you through the crowd. Ignoring people’s curious looks and pushing past them if he has to in order to get you through the doors and outside. His car is parked close by and he huffs as he steers you towards it. “I’m sorry.” He murmurs quietly, knowing you are upset over the scene that just happened.

You don’t say a word as you get into his car. Looking out of the window as he pulls away from the parking lot to drive you to his place. “Well that was a shit show.” You finally say and Dave snorts, “yeah. It was.” You sigh and turn to look at him, saying your brother’s name. “Do you think he will forgive us?”

“You for sure.” Dave answers, unsure if his friend, the man he considered a brother, would ever get over the betrayal of him touching you. “He loves you.” It hurts to think about losing him, because he has known him better than anyone but he doesn’t regret touching you. He reaches over and touches your thigh. “I know you are embarrassed and I’m sorry. I should have waited out in the main room.”

You reach for his hand on your thigh, tangling your fingers with his. “It was all gonna come out at some point. It wasn’t ideal but everyone would’ve found out one way or another. At least now it’s come out and we can deal with the fallout. God, I feel so guilty. So selfish for doing this.” You sigh, looking out of the window. “But I don’t regret it. I meant it, Dave. I’m yours if you want me.”

Dave pauses for a second, mulling over your comment and he squeezes your fingers. “Ask me.” He demands quietly, wondering why you aren’t demanding to know what Matt was talking about as soon as you got in the car. How could you promise to be with him if you didn’t know him? Especially because he wasn’t the type of man to let you go if you became his. 

You sigh, knowing that this conversation has to happen but you were hoping to get settled first. Dave has always been a mystery but it’s never concerned you. He’s treated you well. Never hurt you. Yet you know you need those questions answered before anything more can happen between you. “What happened with your dad?” You ask softly, almost cautiously.

Dave grunts, keeping his eyes on the road. Not wanting to see pity or horror in your pretty eyes. “Man was a fucking monster.” He tells you. “Behind closed doors, of course. Everyone liked Mike York. He was a stand up guy.” He sneers sarcastically. “Until he got drunk and decided that it was fun to beat the shit out of his family, rape his wife.” When Dave was younger, the screams had scared him until he was taking the beatings. 

Then he was angry and unable to defend himself and his mother. Closing himself off from emotions as a survival method. It’s difficult to be abused and either not break or simply harden. His mother had broken, but Dave had become hard. Your brother had been the only one who knew at the time. The bruises were well concealed under his clothes to keep up appearances. 

“When I was sixteen….God, he had fucking knocked back the liquor.” His fingers twitch in your hand, remembering the sounds. “He was pissed he couldn’t get it up. Blaming her for not being woman enough.” It makes him sick, curling in his stomach and it was a large part of why he demanded someone let him know the second they didn’t like something. He was nothing like that bastard. “So he was beating the shit out of her. Thought he was going to kill her that time. I broke through the door and just…..started hitting him.” He remembers the sick crack, the dull thuds of his fists and then the squelch it made when the tissue turned soft, the blood spurting every time he hit him again. “I didn’t stop until the police pulled me off of him.” The only thing that had saved his ass was your brother knowing about the ongoing abuse and the obvious assault on his mother when the police arrived. Still, some had thought Dave was the monster who had killed a prominent member of the community. 

You turn your head to stare at the man you love. Hearing him say that he had killed his abusive father at sixteen years of age to protect his mother makes your stomach twist. Your heart breaks for him. “Oh baby.” You gasp, “I’m so sorry. You - you shouldn’t have had to do that. Your mom didn’t deserve that. Oh shit. I- I’m so sorry.” Tears start to stream down your cheeks with sorrow for your lover.

“Don’t cry for me.” Dave chides, letting go of your hand and reaching up to wipe away your tears. “I’m not worth that. But Matthew was right.” He tells you gruffly, hating that you are crying for him. “I - I had to get a waiver to join the Marines. Because of my ‘violent’ past.” The military hadn’t cared once they had him pass a psych eval. He was slotted for special ops because he already had the emotional disconnect needed to do the things they wanted him to do. “I killed in the Marines. I was- it was what I did then, it’s what I do now. I still take out people on a list.” 

You shake your head, “you were doing your job. That’s what you’re supposed to do. Take out the bad guys. Your dad was a bad guy. You were following orders. Now, you’re doing your job.” You reason, knowing that he’s not killing because he enjoys it, who would do that? You know Dave. He’s treated you with nothing but a gentle hand. It’s hard to imagine him as a cold blooded killer.

He turns onto his street, unable to believe that you are rationalizing what he does. HIs condo is at the end of the block and he swallows as he sees it up ahead. “It doesn’t bother you?” He asks quietly. “Worry you? Even my-” He breaks off. “Even mom was nervous around me until I left home. Worried that I would snap and hurt her.” That had probably been the biggest blow to him. His own mother skittish around him after he killed his father. It was one of the reasons why he had spent so many nights at your house with your brother. He hadn’t been judged by your family and you were completely unaware of what happened even though you were only a few years younger. It was enough to let it slip by you. 

You shake your head, "I know you, Dave. You try to conceal yourself but it doesn't work. I know you. I know you do bad things but deep down, you're a good man. You're the man I fell in love with. I- I don't completely understand the drive to kill but I know it's your job and you keep people safe by taking out bad people. It's not like you are killing innocents."

“It’s….my job.” Dave doesn’t mention that there are times where innocent people die, but that’s just because it’s the way of the world. He pulls into the parking space in front of his garage and cuts the engine. “And you still want to be with me?” He asks seriously. “Because I’m not exactly the type of man that wants to be divorced.”

“I’ve been in love with you since I was sixteen years old. Dave. It’s always been you. I love you. I want to be yours. In every way.” You promise, reaching for his hand. “I know you don’t think you deserve happiness but you do. I want us to be happy together. Let’s not waste anymore time.” You urge him, knowing he will listen to you.

“Then we are getting married.” Dave decides, knowing you won’t object. “We will start looking for a house. One in the suburbs.” He hates living in the metro area, hates how his neighbors share a wall. His eyes find yours and he smirks. “So no one hears you scream in pleasure when I make you cum.”

It’s not the most romantic proposal but you know Dave makes up his mind and it’s done. You lean over the console, “you’re gonna take care of me as Mrs. York?” You tease, brushing your lips against his. “I’ll only be your wife if you make me cum over and over again.”

“Done.” Dave grabs the back of your neck and pulls you towards him for a searing kiss. Immediately taking over and sliding his tongue into your mouth. Giving into the needs that he had kept buried, kept hidden from everyone, even himself. Groaning into your mouth and feeling you melt against him. Kissing you for another long moment before he pulls back. “I love you.” He whispers softly, knowing that he needs to be more affectionate with you. You are going to be his wife, his future, his home. He’s been holding back for so long, but he doesn’t have to do that anymore. 

[crescencestudio]

๋࣭⭑ Devlog #38 | 2.27.24 ๋࣭⭑

How is it already almost March omfg.

Anyways Happy Valentine's Day month!!! This year, I was swamped with work, so I didn't get a chance to make Valentine's Day art. I did make a Valentine's piece last year though.

BUT we did have beloved @magunalafay make these Valentine's Day cards this year for the community!!! <3 If you missed it, well Happy Valentine's Day!!!!!

She made these as a gift, and I love her very much. Maguna u r so talented

This month was pretty busy for me, but I'm super happy with the progress made this month ^^ I feel like I've started the year off in a pretty good groove after it being all over the place for a hot second, yay!!!

This past month, Etza and Druk's routes. With the revamped demo finishing its revisions, it left a lot more time for me to focus writing on full route development.

If you missed the announcement, I FINISHED Etza's first draft!!! YAAAYYY!!!! FINALLY!!!!!!

That means 4/6 routes are finished in terms of the base writing, which is so exciting to MEEEEE. I've always seen Etza's draft as The Milestone because with their route finished, it would mean the four Central routes are done writing. And to me, while there's a good chuck of writing left, we are nearing the end of it.

There's only two routes left and that means it's about ~100k words which is CRAZY compared to when I had ~300k to write (:cries:). Even if that sounds like a lot, once I start chipping away at those routes, that 100k goes into the "double digits" aka 90k...80k... etc. and that makes me want to pee my pants

We also finished editing Druk's route, yay!!! So we reached a lot of milestones this month ^^

We are nearing the end of the Vui background commissions. It's very bittersweet; I'm so used to mentioning him in my devlogs now </3 There's only like 3(?) more BGs left for him to make, and then all of the BGs for the game will be finished. Very Wild! I think Alaris will have 25ish BGs, and they are all Stunning.

It's been a while since I showed you all a BG, so I'll give you all a preview of one I just got in!

Isn't it cozy? Guess whose house hehe

I personally have been doing a lot of sprite work this month to finish the final art assets for the demo. I added some expressions to Druk and Aisa that I'd been procrastinating (I don't even know why I was procrastinating them). And I finally finished Mom and Kimura's updated sprites! Patreon already saw them, but I'll show the new versions here too ^^

Preview of Mom (left) and Kimura (right) updated sprites. Now everyone's sprite styles are cohesive YAY!!

Aside from sprite work, much of my "art" time has been on finishing up/putting together the last of the screens for the GUI. Specifically, I got THIS BABY up and running. She is my crowning glory.

Memory Screen to Replay Unlocked Free Time Dates

Oh my god.... You all have NO IDEA how much of a pain this was to code. There is a transparency gradient going on in the left and right B&W previews (courtesy of community programming angel feniks/shawna).

And then the effort to have the Titles and Descriptions of the Previewed Date change tilted me on Multiple Occasions. But we finally got it to work thanks to bestie @siyo-koy pointing out I just coded one stupid "if" statement wrong LJAFSLIEFJIEJ. But the effort was WORTH IT because I'm so proud of her!!! I hope you all like it too as a way to relive Free Time Dates. I had a lot of fun with the Titles and descriptions.

I also put together the Stats and Affection Screens

Preview of Personality Stats & Affection Screens

So I coded both of them a bit differently from each other. The Personality Screen shows you a breakdown of your traits so far. Think of it like a pie graph! So in the preview picture, your choices indicate you are 33% Brave, 16% Charismatic, etc. I felt like this was a more natural way to portray personality rather than how many bravery points you've collected so far!

And then for Affection, it works in a more traditional way, where it counts it based on how many you've gotten out of the total amount you can get. This way, as the story progresses, how close you are to the person reflects how much your relationship as developed!

I've also added little descriptions underneath each that change depending on the percentage. So for example, if you have gotten 82% of the affection points for Kuna'a, the description of your relationship might change as well hehe

Other than that, I've mainly focused on getting the demo together. We released the beta demo earlier this month (? LOL). And the feedback has been so kind!!

A lot of this month was spent polishing so that the demo can be ready for early access and eventually public release. I updated sprites, made sure music crossfades with each other so that transitions between soundtracks feel smoother, I added/polished all of the screens I needed to (e.g., Memory Room, Full Credits, Cleaning Music Room, Adding Stats Screens), and I FINALLY as of yesterday added the Voiced Lines!!

One thing I added in the Extended Demo that I'm really happy with is the use of Extended Pronouns (courtesy of Angel Feniks). Below is a preview of how it works now!

Preview of Extended Pronouns Function. Credit to Feniks

Basically, you can choose multiple pronouns for yourself, including custom pronouns (e.g., xe/xem, fae/faer, etc.). On top of that, you can choose how often you'd like the pronouns to alternate (e.g., every line versus every scene) and what kind of terms you'd like to be used for you (e.g., neutral vs. masculine vs. feminine)!

Overall, the demo is getting closer and closer to release!!! Early Access will hopefully be ready by the end of this week or next, so if you all would like access to it, please feel free to subscribe to my Patreon for this upcoming month! Available to Wyvern tier ($5) and up.

I didn't have any time to really play any games this month because I was drowning in work LMFAOSLJIEF. I did play the Threads of Bay demo by @lavendeerstudios and it was GORGEOUS! Very cute game with lovable characters and charming visuals. Andrew, I will have your number

Every other section was really long, so I'm going to throw it here even though it's not market research. But Intertwine recently hit 600 ratings, which is crazy. Thank you for still enjoying that game even if it's not one that is my main focus anymore. I'm really happy people still like it :on the verge of tears:

Anyways, this has been a long devlog. Here's to continuing to Ball in March. Hope you all have a great rest of your month, and I'll talk to you soon! <3

[orcasoul]

The swimming lesson

Summary: The reader is friends with Joel and Ellie. During a trek one day the reader embarrassingly admits she can't swim and Ellie suggests that Joel could teach her. Her and Joel arrange a day for her first lesson and they both end up getting more than they bargained for!

Warnings: Smut, under 18's DNI, swearing, use of Y/N.

Italics indicate inward thinking.

This is my first ever attempt at writing smut, so I apologise if it's not that good. Please go easy on me 🙈

Word Count: 7,335

The stifling Wyoming summer sunshine rained it's searing rays down on the three of you as you made your way through the coniferous woodland. Slivers of golden light trickle lazily through the swaying leaves, bathing the trees, the ground and your companions in a luminous glow. The soft breeze blows loose strands from your braid across your face, tickling your nose and cheeks. "Uh, sweating my "balls" off out here," Ellie groaned for the thousandth time. "Hey you wanted to go for a hike, kiddo," Joel blithely reminded her. "Didn't think we'd be out this long," she replied in a teasing tone. "I thought you'd be used to all this walking after coming all the way from Boston," you countered with a smirk and raised eyebrow. "Touche," she answered amusedly. "You're right though, it is scorching out here," you agree as you lethargically drag your feet, kicking up lose rocks and twigs. Joel on the other hand seems to be taking everything in his stride. After journeying across country and the endless smuggling ventures in Boston, a stroll in the wilderness was a piece of cake for him. Over the summer you, Joel and Ellie had taken up trekking for fun, and even though Ellie complained about the heat she actually loved these little adventures, often being the one to arrange these trips.

You loved them too. For years you'd explored the woodland alone after one of your closest friends' had decided the outdoors wasn't for her. Apart from her patrol shifts she rarely left Jackson. But for you a walk in the wild yonder was rejuvenating, a peaceful solace when you could pretend that the world hadn't changed, that people still went about their normal lives, shops were open, cars were running and children could play outdoors and just be children. Maybe this is why Ellie loved these excursions. She had the chance to be a carefree child for a while. After doing this alone for so long it was a welcome change to have company. Joel and Ellie's arrival several months ago was the talk of the town, even if they only stayed for one night. But their return a short while after and their decision to call Jackson home sent a buzz through the community. It's a rare thing for new people to join the town and a lot of the women fawned over Joel the second they saw him return. You couldn't blame them, really. A woman would have to be blind to not find Joel incredibly handsome, but some of them seemed to be all too eager to catch his attention, flirting shamelessly, constantly offering him drinks at the Tipsy Bison and generally making desperate, doe eyed fools of themselves.

You'd noticed over recent months how those women gave you death glares across the bar and the mess hall as you and Joel began to spend more time together. It was inevitable, really. Maria and you were good friends and Joel being Tommy's brother meant you'd unintentionally spent a lot of time with him and his adopted daughter and things just naturally progressed from there, to the point that you'd go to the Tipsy Bison together, have meals at each other's houses and take these leisurely walks. If you were being honest with yourself, you'd been harbouring a crush on the grouchy man from the moment you'd met him and over time those feelings had grown into something much deeper. But you felt it was best if you kept those feelings hidden, seeing as Joel didn't seem all that interested in the whole dating scene. Plenty of times you'd seen him rebuff the not so subtle advances of horny women, mumbling something and walking away from their attempts at seduction to join you, Tommy and Maria at your table. You couldn't resist the urge to smirk at their annoyed expressions and you couldn't deny the relief you felt every time he rejected them. It would have been heartbreaking to watch him take a woman home. But you're not stupid. He's a man with needs after all, and you'd overheard a few of the single women tell their friends that they'd spent the night with Joel. But by the sound of it, that's all it seemed to be; a one night stand.

And that was before the two of you had become friends, which made that bitter pill a little easier to swallow. But in recent months you'd noticed how he couldn't seem to get away from these vultures quick enough when they tried their luck. A part of you hoped, maybe foolishly, that he rebuffed them because maybe, just maybe, he had feelings for you too. But the logical part of your mind kept telling you that was wishful thinking and to not look too much into it. If only your yearning heart would listen to your sensible mind, alas it's never that simple. So you tried your best to ignore your feelings, even though sometimes you could swear you'd caught the odd lingering stare from him, subtle touches lasting longer than necessary, such as when he'd pull you up a steep incline and not immediately release your hand, or when he opened a door for you to walk through and his hand would nestle at the small of your back. Of course it could just be his way of being friendly and polite and maybe you're only seeing what you want to see. So it was for the best to try and suppress any fanciful thoughts and just focus on being his friend. After all, you'd rather have Joel as a friend than not at all.

And now here you are, traipsing through the picturesque landscape with your two favourite people. It's nearing late afternoon now and you swear the sun's heat has spiked just to torture you, sweat rolling down your neck and soaking the top of your tank top. The breeze seems to have vanished too, making the woodland feel like an unforgiving inferno. You watched as Joel led the way along the trail, the broad expanse of his back capturing your attention in a mesmerising allure. You noticed how his sweaty black T-shirt stuck to the planes and muscles of his physique and if you hadn't pretty much sweated all of the water from your body already, you're certain you'd be drooling now. God, does this man even know how beautiful he is? An unexpected outburst from Ellie snapped you out of your momentary ogling. "Oh hell yeah!" She exclaimed, excitedly as she darted off down a trail to the right. "Ellie," Joel shouted as he ran after her, glancing over his shoulder to make sure you were following. As you descend the slight incline you gasp at the sight before you. A small and placid lake with a small jetty (probably built for fishing before the outbreak), surrounded by low lying vegetation and trees sat hidden away as if it's beauty is to sacred for just anyone to see it.

The colour of the water seemed almost unnatural, the dazzling azure of the shore giving way to cobalt blue the further out you looked. The mostly still water rippled now and then as fish came to the surface to devour unsuspecting bugs, while the sunlight glistened and shimmered off the glass like surface. Birds warbled to each other in the trees and you found yourself lost in the moment. A moment to appreciate the radiance and serenity this post apocalyptic world has managed to retain. Beauty, simplicity, harmony; It can all still be found if you take the time to look for it, and with that comes the joy of knowing that not everything had been destroyed. These moments should be cherished, maybe now more than ever. "Wow it's stunning!" you breathed out in awe, eyes fixated on the scene gracing you. "Bombs away!" Ellie yelled as she dropped her pack and ran to the end of the jetty. Her cannonball entrance startled the birds feeding on the shore close by, forcing them to take to the air. After a few moments she breaks the surface with the goofiest grin on her face, while pushing loose, soaked strands out of her eyes.

"You two gotta try this!" she beamed. Joel rolled his eyes in mock annoyance, as he always did when she got carried away. "I don't think so, kiddo," he replied, folding his arms. Ellie huffed, "Fine, you old grouch. You have no idea what you're missing." "I'm sure I don't," Joel smirked. "What about you Y/N?" Ellie asked hopefully. "Um....," you began. "Go on in if you want," Joel insisted with a soft smile that almost made you knees buckle, "I'll keep an eye out." "I...um...," you falter, cheeks turning redder than the heat already made them. Joel raised his eyebrows, puzzled by your awkward response. "Come on," Ellie pressed, almost impatiently, kicking her legs up in front of her. "Don't make me swim alone." You look to Ellie, then to Joel sheepishly. "I can't swim," you confess with a shrug. "Really?" Joel seemed genuinely surprised. You shake your head, embarrassment creeping over you at your lack of knowledge of a skill that could one day save your life.

"Joel can teach you. He taught me," Ellie offered while twirling in the water. "Would you Joel?" you ask, unable to hide the excitement in your voice. "Sure thing, darling," Joel replied, his southern drawl becoming more prominent on the last word. "And don't worry about drowning. Joel will give you the kiss of life," Ellie interjected with a wink and a smirk at you, that suggested she knew something you didn't. "Ellie!" Joel snapped, his flushed cheeks matching your own. "What?" Ellie shrugged nonchalantly, "Just saying is all." Joel looked at you and smiled shyly. You've never seen Joel look so flustered the whole time you've known him and you couldn't help but find him suddenly endearing, provoking a shy smile of your own to break out across your face. "So when can we do this?" you asked quickly, before Joel can change his mind. "Guess we could do it tomorrow?" he suggested. "Cool, tomorrow it is!" You confirmed with a big grin. Your mind was racing with excitement and nerves on the walk back to Jackson. You and Joel would be alone in the water, physically closer than you've ever been before. Just the thought of his big, strong hands holding you in the water was enough to dampen your panties with desire. Stop it! you chastised yourself. He doesn't like you like that. But then why did Ellie wink? And why did Joel seem so awkward? Maybe... nope, nope he doesn't, you try to convince your overly hopeful mind.

Joel could kill Ellie sometimes. That girl is too smart and too perceptive for her own good. For months Joel was convinced he'd successfully concealed his feelings for you, but all this time Ellie could see straight through his facade. His heart thumped nervously in his chest as a thought crossed his mind. If Ellie saw it the whole time, could Y/N? His mouth became dry at the thought that you might have known all along, and for the sake of your friendship had decided to not acknowledge it. But now Ellie had let the cat out of the bag and there's no going back. The last thing he would want is to ruin the friendship the three of you had built over the months. Joel know's he's not the type to easily make friends but the more time he'd unintentionally spent around you, the more he realised he enjoyed your company. Your cheery disposition seemed to balance out his gruff and often grumpy demeanour and in no time at all he'd found himself falling hard for you. So much so that he no longer sought out meaningless one night stands with Jackson's women. He only wanted you. He'd often lie awake at night fantasising about taking you in his arms and worshipping your body as you deserve.

How he'd take his time exploring every inch of you, caressing your smooth skin and bringing you over the edge with his tongue again and again until you were begging him to fuck you. But every time he dared to hope that you could feel the same way he had to remind himself that a young, beautiful, graceful woman like you, who could have any man she wanted, wouldn't look twice at an man two decades older than her. And if the most he could get from you is your friendship, he'd gladly take that any day. He just hopes that Ellie's ill timed but well intended faux pas hasn't now caused irreparable damage. He noticed you'd been unusually quiet for most of the walk back, but then again so had he. Ellie of course filled the, what would have been, uncomfortable silence with her shitty puns and random comments about anything and everything that entered her mind. For once Joel was glad of Ellie's non stop blabber as it eased the air of awkwardness between you both as the two of you fell into conversation with her and eventually each other once again.

The three of you arrive home as the sun coats the evening sky in gold and pink hues, casting long shadows over the town, the calm air cooling to a more bearable temperature. "So.....," you turned to Joel before having to break away to make your way to your own house, "See you bright and early tomorrow?" "Yep, see you then, Y/N," he responded with a light pat on your shoulder, looking directly into your eyes. Just the slightest touch from Joel set your body buzzing. You don't think you've craved anyone so much in your entire life. Feeling a bit bashful under the gaze of his caramel brown eyes, you try your best to compose yourself and, looking between Joel and Ellie you bid them both a good night with a warm smile, then begin to walk away. "Night," Ellie chirps at you while waving, ".....and enjoy your lesson tomorrow!" she calls over her shoulder in an obvious teasing tone. You look back and chuckle when you see Joel gently shove her forward and mumble something at her in exasperation.

The lake sparkled in the early morning sunshine. The flawless surface, reflecting the world above the shoreline in a perfect mirror image resonated deep within you, reminding you once again of why you love to be out in the middle of nature. "Okay, ready for your first lesson?" Joel spoke in his authoritative dad voice as if he was addressing Ellie, which made you stifle a giggle. He dropped his backpack on the ground and pulled out a pair of knee length shorts. "Ready as I'll ever be," you reply enthusiastically. "Be right back," Joel said as he walked off behind a tree to change into the shorts. As he returned he noticed you trying to suppress a smile. Trying and failing. He cocks an eyebrow. "What?" "Nothing, you..... I just never thought I'd see grumpy Joel Miller looking so casual in a pair of shorts," you chuckled behind your hand. "Shut up," Joel playfully scolded you with a hint of discomfiture in his voice. "Aren't you going to change?" Joel inquired while looking over your jeans and T shirt. "You wont be able to swim in them." "One step ahead of you Miller," you grinned while removing your boots and socks, then taking off your top and Jeans to reveal a shocking pink bikini. Joel's jaw had never hit the floor so fast in his life! Heat spread through his cheeks and down south at the sight the sight of you in a bikini. Suddenly he felt like a teenager who'd seen boobs for the first time. You were mesmerising!

His gaze quickly trailed over your exposed body, from the curve of your hips to the valley between your pert breasts, supported perfectly by the thin materiel of your bikini top and finally up to your face. He cleared his throat and shifted awkwardly as you looked at him a little bashfully and he realised he'd been caught staring just a little too long. "Shall we?" you gestured to the lake then turned to disguise the slight smirk that had broken out across your face. You are so glad you'd decided to check the old suitcases during a patrol to the ski lodge a few weeks ago, and found this little gem. You were initially hesitant about wearing it in front of Joel. It's been so long since you'd worn a bikini and the though of being so exposed felt quite foreign now, but judging by Joel face you couldn't have looked too bad in it. His reaction had set something off in your brain. Maybe he is attracted to me, after all? Maybe he's always wanted me as much as I want him..... or maybe it's just been a while since he's seen an (almost) naked woman, well... he's a man at the end of the day.

You're rational mind decided it was best to settle on that last reason and not dwell on it. You follow Joel into the water, nervously stepping further out until the surface is lapping at your waist. "It's effing freezing!" you shrieked cheerfully, while holding your hands above the water. "Wimp," Joel teased as he looked back at you, instantly noticing how your nipples poked through your bikini top. He spun his head back around, trying to gather his thoughts. "Just a little further," he coaxed. "It's not too deep." You swallow apprehensively and wade out a bit further until the water is level with your chest. You close the gap between you and Joel, suddenly feeling a warmth spread through you despite the frigid water. How can he have such an effect on me?... Focus, idiot! You look up into Joel's mahogany eyes and for a moment neither of you say anything or even move. Forget the fear of drowning in the lake, you're already drowning in those big, expressive, puppy dog eyes! Joel looks as nervous as you feel, the air so thick with sexual tension that you'd forgotten to breath.

You slowly release the breath you'd been unknowingly holding, your chest shuddering slightly as it escaped. It didn't go unnoticed by Joel, who was trying his best to keep it together when all he wanted to do was take you in his arms, taste you, feel you..... His jaw ticked as he cleared his throat again. "So..." Joel begins, awkwardly, "The first thing ya need to learn is how to stay afloat in an emergency." Joel's head begins to clear a little as he focuses on the lesson. "If you're in deep water and getting tired just lay on your back with your arms and legs spread out like a starfish." He demonstrated the position briefly, then stood back up and walked back over to you. Your eyes lustfully trailed over his torso as he made his way back. His soaked T-shirt clung to every inch of his chest and you suppressed the urge to bit your bottom lip. "Okay, you try." "But I'll sink," you protested timorously. "No you won't. I won't let ya," he reassured you with a small smile. "I'll keep my hand under your back and only let go when you're feeling confident, Okay?"

His soft and reassuring gaze helped to settle your unease. You've always trusted Joel and if he says he won't let you sink, then you're perfectly safe. "Okay..." you agree with a bit more confidence. As you begin to lean back you feel his hand lightly press against your back. What you weren't expecting was for his other hand to sweep across the back of your thighs to bring your legs to the surface with the rest of your body. A shot of arousal shot straight to your sex at the contact, your pussy clenching around nothing, while trying to keep your breathing steady. While floating you make sure to focus on the clear blue sky above you and not on Joel. Damn it, if you make eye contact now, you'll lose the last bit of composure you're just about clinging to. "There you go Y/N, you got it. Doing so well," Joel praised, softly.

Maybe it was just your heightened state of arousal but Joel's low, smooth voice sent a shudder rippling through you, exciting every inch of your body. It's enough to drive you to distraction! If he felt you shudder you could at least blame it on the cold water and hide the fact that he's so easily making you feel like a horny schoolgirl. You're so preoccupied with keeping your waning composure in check that you don't notice that Joel is having just as hard a time focusing as you are. Seeing your entire body laid out before him, (and almost naked for God sake), is the sweetest torture he's ever had to endure. He can't help it but his eyes momentarily drift to your chest, relishing the sight of your pebbled nipples poking through the thin fabric of your bathing suit, the way the water runs down each breast. God, how he longs to run his fingers over your silky looking skin and gently pinch your nipple until you moan..... Fuck, he groaned inwardly. He shouldn't be looking at you and thinking about you like this. You're his friend for crying out loud, his much younger friend too! He shakes his head as though it would erase every sinful thought invading his mind.

"Okay," he breathed, "I'm gonna let go now, darling." He slowly removes his hands, much to your disappointment, and your body begins to float. You're amazed at how easily you bob on the surface and can't hold back an elated squeal. "Joel, I'm actually floating. I'm doing it, look!" Joel's heart felt like it just grew in size at your carefree and childlike happiness. Seeing you smile, hearing you laugh reminds him that there is still beauty in this world. "Good job, sweetheart," Joel commended with a grin, "knew you could do it." After a few moments of savouring the sensation of almost weightlessness you lowered your feet to the bottom and decided your are brave enough to try again, without assistance. You beam with excitement as the movements come to you so effortlessly. "You're a natural," Joel crooned. Giggling you place your feet back down and turn to face Joel, who looked like a proud dad at his kids' school play. With exhilaration still buzzing through your veins you look up into Joel's eyes with a broad grin, "Thank you for- Arrrrgh!!!..."

Joel felt as though he was going to have a heart attack as a sudden burst of adrenaline ripped through him. Before he could even fully register what was happening you had gripped onto his neck, wrapped your legs tightly around his stomach and tried to crawl higher up his torso. The sheer, unexpected force of your body slamming into his knocked him off balance. He stumbled back while instinctively wrapping his arms around you, just managing to steady himself before falling back and taking you under with him. "What the fuck?!" Joel yelled, his face matching the panic on your own. "Something's down there! It touched me! It fucking touched me!" You screamed while while still trying to crawl up him. Joel sighed a breath of relief. "It's just a fish. There's plenty of them in here. They ain't gonna hurt you," He reassured you while trying to suppress a smirk. However his voice betrayed the fact that he now found your reaction amusing. "Hey, it's not fucking funny, okay!" you smiled as you slapped his shoulder. "It scared the shit out of me!" "And you scared the shit outta me! Can't do that to an old man!" Joel retorted lightheartedly.

You chuckled while nervously looking around for a few moments, not that you can see anything under the water, then turn your attention fully to Joel. You've never been this close to him before and you find yourself transfixed by his eyes. You notice the varying shades of brown and how they blend so intricately together, as if nature itself is an artist and Joel is the masterpiece. Those beautiful, expressive orbs could tell a thousand stories and you wish to know every one of them, the good and the bad. But the story they seem to be conveying now is one of nervousness and..... want? It feels as though he's looking past your own eyes and into your very soul, discovering secrets and desires deep within. You feel vulnerable and exposed and you like it. You're not sure how long you've both been staring at one another, when suddenly you are acutely aware that Joel's hands are cupping your ass, on big palm on each cheek, holding you tightly against him. You feel your tits press into his chest with every inhale you take, but you don't want to move.

Joel's brain is still trying to catch up with what exactly just transpired here. With what led you both to being in such an intimate embrace. All he knows for certain is that he owes that fish a huge debt! He never imagined he would eve get to hold you so close and now he never wants to let go. He could be wrong, he could be seeing what he wants to see but he's been around long enough to recognise the look you're giving him in this moment; The look of longing and desire. That, coupled with the fact that your soft and supple ass is currently in his hands has his cock rock hard in his shorts. Thank god you climbed up his body or this would have been really awkward. "Joel," you whisper in a sultry tone, "You can..... you can let go now." You know your expression belies your words. Truthfully you could stay this way forever. Joel notices the contradiction, and it may be foolish of him but he has to know. He has to try or he'll regret it for the rest of his days. "Do you want me to let go?" he asked slowly, chest heaving in anticipation. He's sure you can feel the vibrations of his frantic heartbeat. You almost say yes but your body yearns for his touch, his warmth, and it's obvious now that he doesn't want to let go. You stare into his eyes for a few moments before shaking your head, "No... I don't" you exhale in relief, feeling a weight lifted from you now that you've made it clear you want him. He knows now and there's no going back.

Your gaze leaves his eyes and travels to his plush lips, then return to his eyes, looking for any indication that he's uncomfortable. But all you find is a quiet confirmation that he wants this as much as you do in the way he also looks at your mouth, then to your eyes. Slowly, you lean in, giving him the chance to back away if he changes his mind. But before you can think too much on that Joel closes the gap between you both, pressing his lips to yours. His lips feel as soft as they look, a feather-light touch that sends jolts of electricity down your spine. You slide a hand up into his hair, gently gripping onto his wavy locks. Joel deepens the kiss while sliding his tongue across your bottom lip. You gladly grant him access, savouring the taste and feel of his warm tongue for the first time. What began as a delicate, soft kiss has now become a passionate entanglement of tongues and teeth. You grip his hair harder with both hands to hold his head as you both lick into each other. Joel's fingers dig into your ass cheeks, pushing your already throbbing core to rub against his stomach. You gasp as you involuntarily grind your pussy against him, which causes Joel to grip you tighter and moan into your mouth. A deep, reverberating moan that travels through his chest and into yours, igniting and insatiable need for him to be inside you. Joel breaks away to look into your eyes, his own dark with need.

"Jesus Christ Y/N, you got no idea how badly I want you," Joel rasped while running one hand up the curve of your bare back. A small smile tugs at the corner of your mouth as you playfully run your nose along the curved tip of his. "Show me," you purred against his lips, while running a hand down his stomach, to the hem of his shorts. Joel's brain almost short circuited right then and there. He's pray's, no begs this isn't all a dream. Here you are, the woman he's fallen hopelessly in love with, whom he craves more than oxygen, is asking him to discover her in the most intimate sense. He can't hold back anymore. He's like a man possessed! Grabbing the back of your neck, he crashes his mouth onto yours, his tongue parting your lips and finding your tongue once again. You moan into his mouth as his fingers find the hem of your bikini bottoms, covering your soft lips. He slowly slides a finger underneath the fabric, resulting in your back arching of it's own accord. His tender stroking is enough to send jolts of pleasure throughout your clenching pussy. You run your hand further down and into his shorts, finding his already throbbing cock. Fuck, he's huge! You use your fingers to map out the image, feeling each vein along his length and the sheer width.

You feel a smug sense of satisfaction knowing you are the reason he's so hard right now. You feel his cock twitch as you wrap your hand around him and slowly begin to pump up and down, rubbing your thumb over the sensitive head. The groan you pull from him is primal and only serves to fuel your own arousal more. Joel's now holding you by one ass cheek as his thick and agile fingers tease your entrance. Your grip tightens around his dick as he lightly traces along your folds until he settles on your clit. A high pitched gasp escapes from your throat as Joel begins to rub small circles over the little bundle of nerves, sending tingles all along your cunt and into your lower stomach, the sensitivity causing your whole body to shudder as his strokes become faster and more determined. Unable to focus on anything but the intense pleasure anymore, your moans turns into cries as your face falls to his shoulder and your hand stills on his cock. Joel holds you tight as waves of euphoria radiate across your shuddering frame, seizing your muscles and stealing the air from your lungs. "That's it, good girl. So good for me," Joel purrs in your ear as you come down from your high. "Joel...." you wheeze, breathlessly. "Hmm?" He hums as he nips at your earlobe while squeezing your ass tighter. "I need.... need you inside me....now," you rasp through your delirious haze.

Just hearing you say those words (words he never thought he'd hear from you) has Joel's mind whirling. "I'll give ya what you need sweetheart. I'll take good care of ya, but not in this dirty water. Don't want ya getting an infection, do we?" And with that he grips your plush ass with both hands, pulling you up to wrap your legs tighter around his waist, the unexpected manhandling turning you on even more than you thought possible. He walks you both out of the water and onto the shoreline as if you weigh nothing to him. Joel kisses you again while slowly sliding you down his body until one foot reaches the ground, the other leg is hiked up to his hip, his calloused hand smoothing the soft flesh at the back of your thigh. With a deep groan he releases your leg and walks over to the backpacks, pulling two towels out and laying them on the mossy ground. Joel walks back over to you, wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you off your feet, causing you to giggle, which in turn brings out of him that smile you adore. It's a good thing he has a firm hold of you right now or your knees would give out at such a beautiful sight. He brings you to the towels to lay you down. The cool, mossy ground is almost as soft as a mattress and the thought of having Joel out here in the beauty of the natural world is both freeing and exhilarating! As Joel settles between your legs you sit up and grab the bottom of his T-shirt.

He lifts his arms, allowing you to pull his wet shirt off. His body is a sight to behold! Broad shoulders leading to a toned chest with a scattering of greying chest hair, thick arms almost three times the size of your own, perfectly bronzed and sun kissed skin littered with several scars; A testament of his will and ability to survive in a dangerous and unpredictable world. You suddenly feel like no-one and nothing on this Earth could touch you with this powerhouse of a man at your side. You bite your lower lip and lean in, planting kisses all along his collarbone and move down his chest, running your hands up and down his soft stomach. As you indulge in enjoying Joel's body with your lips and tongue, he reaches around to unclasp your bikini top, letting it fall to the ground. He pulls back to admire the sight gracing his eyes. The image of your bare breasts before him has Joel salivating. His eyes turn dark with lust. He lifts a hand to caress the soft swell of your tit, rolling a pebbled nipple between his thumb and forefinger, just as he'd imagined. Christ, you feel heavenly!

The sound of your sultry sigh only increases the intensity of Joel's burning desire to claim every bit of you. He lowers his head and takes your tit into his mouth, swirling his tongue around your hardened nipple, while palming the other one. Your arms wrap around his head and your head falls back as you arch your back, pushing your chest further into his face. The sounds he's pulling from you only seem to spur him on. After a few more moments he releases your nipple with a satisfying 'Pop' and smirks. "God baby girl, you're perfect," Joel croons, "Tell me what you want." " I want to taste you, Joel." You didn't mean for your voice to sound like a whiny beg but that's all you can muster in your lust filled state. You look down to admire the tent in his shorts. "S'all yours, darling," he grins, his honeyed Texan drawl making you swoon. You eagerly pull his shorts down and his cock springs free, hitting his lower belly and smearing a smattering of precum over his 'treasure trial'. Your eyes widen at the size of him. Your sense of touch didn't deceive you; He really is fucking huge!

Your eyes trail up his thick and veiny member to the purplish tip and without realising you bite your bottom lip again. Joel chuckles, softly, "Like what you see?" "Mmmhmm....," is the only sentence you can articulate in return, your eyes wide in lust as you take in the glorious sight of him. You look up to Joel's face and silently tell him to stand, while you get up on your knees. You delicately take his dick in your hand, your fingers and thumb not even meeting around the girth of it. Slowly and firmly you pump while looking up at Joel, whose eyes are in the process of rolling back into his skull! "Fuck, Y/N, just like that. Feel's so good," he whines. Before he knows it he feels the wet warmth of your mouth enveloping him, your tongue swirling languidly around the head, almost making his knees buckle. He feels himself sink further into your throat, eliciting deep, sensual moans from your chest that vibrate through his cock, making him shudder. He feels close, too close as you continuously hollow out your cheeks and suck with a vengeance again and again. He has to stop you know or he won't last long enough to fuck you. "Okay, that's enough, sweetheart," he gushes as he gently pulls himself from your mouth, "or I'm not gonna last much longer and I wanna feel all of you," he says with a wink.

He carefully lays you back down on the ground as if you're made of fine china, and removes your bikini bottoms. "Whew..." Joel whistles, staring at your pussy with look of a starved animal. "Beautiful!" His reaction to your naked cunt stirs a feeling of desperation to have him inside you right now. "Joel.... I need you, need to feel you-" "Patience darling," he soothed while teasing your moist folds. "Just gonna loosen you up a bit for me. I don't wanna hurt you." He slowly sinks two thick fingers inside you, dragging along your velvety walls. You gasp in pleasure, your hips bucking in response to the welcome intrusion. After a few moments he hooks his fingers, pressing over and over onto that sweet spot that now has you reduced to a squirming, panting mess. "So wet," Joel marvels, his voice dripping with seedy desire. Your walls start to flutter as a burst of pleasure grips you for the second time. "Oh shit, Joel," you mewl as you recover from yet another orgasm, leaving you breathless. Joel smiled, his eyes crinkling at the sides. "I know, baby. Ready for me now?" "Yes, please, just fuck me!" you beg, unashamedly. "I've got ya, gorgeous," Joel whispered. He notches the tip of his cock at your entrance, looks into your eyes and steadily and gently pushes into you, parting your velvety walls around his thickness. The beautiful sting of the stretch has you gasping and rolling your head back, overwhelmed with the sensations of pain and pleasure, both complimenting one another and setting your nerves, your cells, every part of you ablaze.

Joel can't help but grunt as he bottoms out completely. You both still for a moment, just to enjoy the feel of each other. You've never felt so deliciously full in all your life and wish it would never end. He then begins to thrust in and out, one hand gripping your hip while the other kneads hungrily at your breast. As Joel picks up the pace you feel him hitting your G spot over and over. You arch your back, wrap your arms and legs around him and spread your thighs wider, clamping your calves around his waist and digging your feet into his ass to push him as deep as possible. You just can't get enough of him! The tingling sensation returns, heat building in your belly at the blissful feeling of Joel's hard and throbbing cock hitting every part of your silky tunnel, bringing your orgasm dangerously closer by the second. Joel continues to pound into you like his life depends on it, battering your cervix. You've never experienced this level of rapture with any previous sexual partners. Joel certainly puts them to shame today. The familiar coil begins to tighten in your lower belly, causing your walls to contract harder around his length.

"Fuck," Joel gushes, sounding awed. "So tight!..... fucking.... fucking made for me sweet girl!" Joel's relentless pounding has you crying out his name as you soak his cock with you slick juices. "You're doing so good. Takin' me so good. I think you can give me one more, what ya say?" Your eyes feel heavy, chest heaving as you are still recovering from your third high. "I... can't...." you pant desperately. "Yes you can , baby." Joel's gentle coax seeps into your shaking body, making you completely compliant to his wishes. Hell, you'll do anything he wants right now. He kisses you, deep and hungry with passion while moving his fingers to your aching core. You're already to overstimulated that it takes mere seconds before you feel another orgasm building as he rubs faster and faster at your swollen bud. Your hands grip onto his shoulders, digging your nails in so deep you know you're leaving little crescent indents in his soft flesh. Something about that excites you even more, as if you're marking him as yours. You tremble, uncontrollably as a sudden surge of white hot bliss sweeps through your anatomy, your voice horse from screaming in ecstasy, you're ears ringing through yet another intoxicating peak.

You can tell Joel is close as his thrusts become sloppy. The sweet sound of your blissed out moans leaving your soft lips is music to Joel's ears. He's sure even the heavenly hosts could not sounds as enchanting as you do right now in his arms. He grabs your hand from his shoulder and lays it beside your head, interlacing his fingers with yours. He buries his face into your neck as he feels about ready to erupt. The warmth, the wetness, how you fit so perfectly around him, squeezing his pulsating erection is too much. "Where do you want me, sweetheart?" Joel asks in a low shuddering voice in your ear. "Inside please!" you implore. "I want all of you." Joel growls lewdly at the thought of laying complete claim to you by coating your insides in himself. A few more deep snaps of his hips brings his balls to tighten and throb as he bursts within you, painting your fluttering walls with thick ropes of his pearly white cum. His thrusts slowly cease as your legs fall limp from his sides. You kiss him leisurely, both groaning into each other's mouths. "That was..." Joel begins, still catching his breath, cheeks flushed red. "Wow..." You finish his sentence with a lazy smile. "Yeah," Joel chuckles as he slides out of you onto his back on the towel. You already miss the feeling of him being inside you.

He wraps an arm under your neck and around your shoulder, pulling you into his side. You lay your head on his chest and rest a hand on his soft tummy. He lovingly lays his hand on top of yours and you notice just how much his large hand dwarfs yours. Basking in the afterglow, you both just lay together, revelling in this new found intimacy between you. For so long you've wanted Joel to know exactly how you feel but the fear of rejection kept your confession at bay. Even though there were times when you suspected that he might want more than friendship, you didn't want to push the boundary and potentially ruin the close friendship you'd both built. But knowing now that he's wanted you all along in the same way you want him leaves no doubt in your mind; You're his and he's yours. You can't keep the smile off your face, knowing you've both crossed into new territory and what this means going forward. It may be a little soon and some might even call you downright foolish as your next words flow from the heart with such conviction. "Joel...." you breathed quietly. "Hmmm," he answered in a low rumble. "I love you." A moment of silence passes and an anxious knot begins to from in your stomach, fearing you've ruined this moment by coming on too strong. But before your mind can spiral any further with doubts, Joel pulls you into him even tighter, tucking you under his chin and kisses the crown of your head. He sighs contentedly and whispers "I love you too Y/N.

[planetpiastri]

💝+ a kiss on the cheek that turns into a kiss on the lips from the a hundred different kisses with bob?🤍

im a big dumby and have had this sitting half-written in my drafts for like a week!! anyways i think this is so sweet and so cute and i hope u enjoy<3 | [wc - 0.8k]

The night air was cold, but you hardly noticed. Bob was warm, and as you hooked your arm through his and intertwined your fingers, heat flared through you, fighting off the chill of the evening.

While tonight might have only been your third date, it felt like you’d been together for ages now. Things had progressed naturally and gradually with Bob, and in the six months since you’d met him, you’d never stopped getting butterflies when he so much as brushed his hand against yours. You could hardly believe he seemed to feel the same for you that you felt for him.

There was just one problem: he hadn’t kissed you yet.

You didn’t mind taking things slow with Bob. In fact, you thought it was pretty sweet. On your first date he had told you earnestly, “I want it to be special,” and you trusted him. With other guys you might have worried that there was some other reason they were holding back, but with Bob you didn’t have to worry about those silly insecurities. It was nice, and it was refreshing.

But you also really, really wanted to kiss him.

Actually, strike that—you really, really, really wanted him to kiss you. 

All these thoughts and more raced through your mind as you left the mini golf course and began to cross the parking lot back to Bob’s car, and you were still lost in thought as he pulled out and merged onto the highway back towards home.

He turned on the radio and reached over, lacing your fingers together, and you smiled. It pulled you back into the present moment, and you were alarmed by how much you liked this man. But then his tongue darted out to wet his lips, and you were right back to that same train of thought as before.

When he pulled up outside your apartment, he turned the radio down and said, “I know you have an early morning tomorrow. I had a lot of fun tonight, though.”

“Hm,” you said, distracted.

He squeezed your hand, his smile nervous and curious. “You okay? You’ve seemed a world away since you beat me at mini golf.”

What were you doing? You were in a car with a beautiful boy who cared deeply about you—so deeply about you that he wanted you to have the perfect rom-com moment you’d dreamed of since you were a little kid. And here you were, moping about it.

You squeezed his hand back and smiled reassuringly. “Sorry. Just thinking about tomorrow. I’m sorry I have to go so early, but I’d love to see you this weekend.”

His eyes crinkled when he smiled. You loved that about him. “I’d really like that.”

“Okay. Okay, bye, Bob.” You squeezed his hand again—god, you wanted to kiss him so bad—before opening your passenger door and getting out. You paused there on the sidewalk for a moment.

Oh, what the hell?

You dashed around the hood of Bob’s car, stopping at his driver’s side door and gesturing for him to roll the window down. When he did, you said, “Sorry. I just—I had a lot of fun tonight. I wanted to say thank you.”

“Oh. You’re welcome.”

And his tongue darted out to wet his lips again.

If he was going to do it, now was the moment. You met his eyes, feeling drawn deeply into them. His fingers fidgeted on the steering wheel. Goosebumps prickled your legs.

And he didn’t kiss you.

With a sigh, you reached out to gently cup his cheek. You orchestrated every moment, hoping and praying that you weren’t about to find out that he actually was holding back for those other reasons. But his cheek was warm, and he leaned into your touch as you tipped through the window and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.

The words ‘Bye, Bob’ died on your lips as his hand came up to cup your jaw, and as you began to pull away again, he turned his head and captured your mouth with his.

It was fireworks; it was a roller coaster; it was the beach at sunset; it was a run through an airport; it was the special moment you had both been waiting for. It was quite possibly the best kiss ever recorded in history.

He pulled away with a soft gasp and breathed, “I couldn’t wait any more.”

In reply, you wrapped your hands around the back of his neck and kissed him again. He made a soft, happy sound in the back of his throat, drawing a smile onto your face even as your mouth moved against his.

You pulled away, pressing another quick kiss to his cheek before withdrawing from the window, glad to see your own unshakable smile mirrored on his face. Now, finally, you said, “Bye, Bob.”

“Good night,” he whispered.

You forced yourself not to look over your shoulder as you walked up to your apartment, turned the key in the lock, and slipped inside. Your heart pounded in your chest as you pressed your back against the closed front door, letting your eyes fall shut blissfully.

Okay, so maybe three dates was the perfect amount of time to wait for a first kiss.

[dreamtydraw]

i gotta know more about your mc and baxter (i am never free from this man somebody help me). do they date in step 3, or just crush on each other? and the angst, pls gimme some angst >:D

oh, and do you have any headcanons about them together? :3

*slap my knee* WELL HONEY you have a BIG storm coming-

I’m a multi-shipper so Cerise has a storyline where they date and one where they were just really good friends and in both cases: Baxter was someone extremely important to Cerise.

Important context to understand: Cerise was nonverbal for almost half of her life. She has an important communication problem that actively ruin her personal life as she struggle to talk to people and so not isolate herself. Regardless of the nature their relathionship take, Baxter is extremly important to her as he's the first person she managed to befriend by herself. He came off strong and she took her chance to try talking with someone else and it ended up feeling easy around him.

They are vastly different and this is one of the main reasons they work together: They get to experience, learn and witness a new way of living life. Cerise gets to build her confidence slowly, they have an agreable moment and the dating is all new and attracting to her. She feels a lot and is in the company of someone who appreciates her and makes her come out of her shell.

You can imagine how such an impactful relationship can turn from the loveliest encounter of your summer to the most emotionally damaging event of your life.

Also worth mentioning is that in my playthrough Baxter closed the door in Cerise's face while she was bawling her eyes out on his porch... Yeah it didn't went well....

The reason why this breakup impacted Cerise so much is how some little details spiral in an endless train of negative thoughts: "If I was worth it, he would have tried" and "I am not even capable to move on from something so insignificant for him" "I feel stupid for having felt confident" "I should have known that I was not made to be around people, I can't even talk to someone properly" "I'm too much"

Cerise's self-confidence got shattered, having walked right back of all the effort she managed to make and her mutism coming back into her daily life. It only took one conversation to ruin an entire process of self grow.

The reunion was a painful one and here is where I call my phase the: Baxter pain and regret.

Just imagine for a second, you are so miserable because of your own choices, you left someone who loved you by convincing yourself they'll move on and 5 years later when you meet them again they are a shell. You hurted them so much that to this days your presence haunted them, the person you loves because of their positivity, their smile and bright kindness are now dull, sad and scared. The regret of it all and the pain of wanting to ask why, to wanting to help but also desperetly not wanting to furter implicate yourself while they still look at you with hope. How much would it hurt you to be given a chance even after all you destroyed ? After all the joy you denied for both of you and with all the regrets of have spent so much time in your selfish perception of the world. It would sting and that something that can never dissapear, even if she's back, even if you try again, even if you make progress, you simply can't make up for what you caused and it hunt you at night. You always been loved, you always loved them, and like a fool you reciprocate those feelings by doing the opposite of what love is suppose to be.

NOW THAT ANGST HAVE PASSED- Here is some cute dating headcanon I have of these two :D

Oh and one last sad stuff :

Cerise cut and dyed her hair because Baxter used to say he liked her long orange hair and the compliment felt so bittersweet that she couldn't stand seeing herself in the mirror...

ANYWHOOZIE

-Cerise likes jewelry and likes to make colorful jewelry so she wanted to make bracelets for Baxter. One colorful green to keep as a souvenir and one black and white.

-Still on jewelry, they traded. In exchange for a bracelet, he gave her some rings of his (that she kept wearing for the 5 years )

-They kissed in the car watching the firework because Cerise doesn't like loud noises

-Cerise doesn’t like sudden louse noise but had fun listening to Baxter’s music during some car rides.

-Because she can’t drive she asked him to pick her up or give her a ride to some stores just to have some time with him.

-They met at the cypres during the "soirée" moment and this fun fact always makes them laugh, life sure like them together.

-Fear of the ocean vs Fear of height, both are here to help the other fight against their fear with a little help

-Cerise gave Baxter a glass shot as a souvenir and he only once drank in it alone but was too scared to break it so he kept it hidden.

-I have this hc that once they get married ( because yes they will ) Baxter has a picture of her somewhere in his office and if someone asks "Are you married ?" he just pull up the pic of his very colorfull and and cheerful wife so people look at him confuse

you married a rainbow ?!

-Everyone had their moment of "don't ever hurt her again" with Baxter but the worst one was Liz who profaned murder hunt if he did.

-Still, Baxter got accepted nicely back into the family.

-Cerise's services as a photographer got added to Baxter's wedding contact of people he can recommend and they at least worked on some weddings together.

-Neither of them are morning people, but they spend a lot of their nights hanging out and simply talking until late.

-Some dinner nights they take a detour to dance a bit on the side near the beach

-Travel around the world travel around the world! Cerise has some nice vacation places she wants to do with Baxter and they sometimes need some calm time.

-They just love each other, 5 years are nothing compared to the rest they spent together

THANKS YOU FOR READING THIS FAR

[naminethewriter]

One's Hometown, One's New Home

Chapter Six: Complicated Families

Masterpost | First | Previous | Next | Ao3

@tss-anxceit-week

Summary: Janus’ hometown is a usually quiet place where everyone knows everyone. So when someone new moves in, they’re usually the hottest topic of local gossip. The newcomer then comes by the library Janus works at, he can’t help but chat with him a little. Doesn’t hurt that he’s good looking as well.

Content Warnings: Referenced Homophobia, Past Parental Death, References to the Foster System

~*~

“You sure you don’t want a glass?” Janus asked as he poured himself some wine. Virgil sat next to him on the couch and shook his head.

“No, thanks. Alcohol isn’t my thing in general. I’ll stick to water.”

“Suit yourself.” Janus leaned back and took a sip, taking a moment to enjoy it. Virgil shifted, a bit uncomfortable with the silence.

“My dad,” Janus began after he took a deep breath, “came to this town in his early twenties. He brought nothing but a single suitcase, his papers, and some money. He found work in an auto repair shop and quickly became a hot topic of the locals. He was kind, hard working and handsome, allegedly. The perfect bachelor. At least, according to what my mom’s told me. My grandma was always a lot more skeptical about him, but she rarely trusted outsiders.

“My mom had also turned twenty around that time. She was working as a waitress in a local diner. It wasn’t really that she needed the money but that she didn’t know what to do after school. She liked the idea of college but didn’t know what to major in and such. My grandparents hadn’t been much for travel, so my mom hadn’t seen much of the world, and she was curious. So, of course my dad as an outsider appealed to her.”

Virgil listened intently to Janus’ story while fiddling with the edge of a blanket.

“They got to talking a lot when my dad came into the diner for meals. She asked him about where he’s been and he’d in turn ask her about the local places and legends. It naturally progressed with them starting to date and eventually getting married.” Janus paused, taking another sip of his wine.

“But that’s not all?” Virgil prompted quietly.

“Well, a lot of the rest is speculation, both of my mother’s and my own. Dad didn’t like talking about what exactly happened before he moved here or his family. But a fact is that he wasn’t heterosexual. Actually, very early on into him dating my mom he broke out into tears and told her that he never thought that he could fall in love with a woman.”

Suddenly, Virgil had a bad feeling about where this story was going.

“Mom never minded it, of course. She knew dad loved her with all his heart. But it made her question his reasons for coming here all the more. Dad never outright said it, but mom’s pretty sure he came from a rather wealthy, old-fashioned, and conservative family that kicked him out when they found out about his sexuality. He probably had a boyfriend he left behind. Or maybe they broke up, we don’t know. Mom wrote down what little information he told her and connected the pieces from there.”

After Janus finished his story, they were both quiet for a while. For a second time that evening, Virgil didn’t know how to respond.

“That really sucks,” he finally said. It startled a laugh out of Janus at least.

“Yeah. He probably would have told us at some point if the accident hadn’t happened. I do know his hometown and his former last name, so I could look some things up if I wanted to, but… so far I haven’t dared.”

“I can understand that. It’s the same with me in a way.”

Janus looked at him and cocked his head. A silent offer to continue or change the topic, either way, he wasn’t going to push, and Virgil was grateful for it.

“You’re right, I wasn’t always a werewolf. I—” He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I’m an orphan, actually. I don’t know what happened to my parents, if they died or if they didn’t want me or what. Never had the courage to ask or look it up. I’ve been in the foster system for as long as I can remember. I developed an anxiety disorder very early on and that made my chances at adoption slim.”

Janus put away his glass and offered his hands to Virgil in silent support. He hesitated for a moment but took them and squeezed them gently.

“I switched between foster families every few years until I was twelve. Then I was taken in by a lesbian couple that more or less specialized in older children with neurodivergences. They didn’t do adoptions, but they were very supportive of me and the others they took in. I stayed with them until I aged out and they helped me find an apartment that I could afford. If it hadn’t been for them, I probably wouldn't have finished school. I didn’t want to go to college, so I got two shitty paying jobs and just did the best to keep myself afloat. I wasn’t really living as much as surviving.

“Then one day I was on my way home from work. It was dark and cold and I just wanted to go back as quickly as possible, so I took a few shortcuts. I didn’t live in the most secure neighborhood, so I carried a pocketknife with me, just in case. I was passing through an alley when I suddenly heard some growling. I just thought it was a dog or something and continued but then a wolf rounded the corner and barreled into me. I panicked. Managed to get my knife out and just stabbed. I hit it in the shoulder, and it wasn’t happy about it. Bit me in retaliation and I passed out.”

Janus held his hands a bit tighter, and Virgil remembered to breathe. The memory alone could still make him panic a little.

“When I woke up, I was in an apartment I didn’t know. A woman was watching over me and started fussing as soon as I moved. It took me a bit to understand what was happening, but she explained that she was the wolf that attacked me and that she hadn’t meant to. Apparently, there was a territorial dispute, and she was on the run from another pack. I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and her instincts kinda took over, especially when I stabbed her. She turned me without meaning to.”

“So, that was how you became a wolf?”

Virgil nodded. “Yeah. She introduced herself as Mary Lee. She was a college student and also still a relatively new werewolf. Then she introduced me to the rest of her pack, also all students. Her boyfriend Lee was the leader of the pack and a born wolf, as well as the one who had turned Mary Lee. They were all super apologetic towards me and reassured me that they would do their best to take care of me and help me learn about my new self.” He smiled at the fond memory.

“They kept their word, and the next few years were the happiest I had so far. It felt like I finally had a family. It wasn’t perfect of course but I didn’t mind. But the thing about college is that eventually, you graduate. And that means change.

“Lee and Mary Lee had plans and places to be. New York City to be exact. The other members of the pack also went off to pursue whatever they wanted. I didn’t really have anything like that. Lee and Mary Lee offered me to come along, they both saw me as their little brother at that point. And I really considered it. I loved living with them, but I also felt like I would be intruding. Not that I wanted to tell them that, but Mary Lee knew me and got me to talk eventually.

“She again told me that I wouldn’t, that they both would love for me to be there but that she doubted that I truly wanted to come along. ‘You’re just not built for the city life and that’s okay,’ she said. And it’s true, I hate cities. Even where we lived was almost too much for me. So she told me to go and find my own path and if it ever got too hard, she and Lee would welcome me with open arms.”

“They sound like amazing people.”

“They are,” Virgil smiled sadly. “And I really miss them, but we’re keeping in touch. They promised they’d come visit me as soon as they had the time, and I was truly settled in.”

“Thank you for telling me, Virgil,” Janus said earnestly and again squeezed his hands.

“It felt good to talk about it actually,” Virgil laughed. “I was kind of avoiding thinking about how much I miss them.”

“Yeah, I know the feeling.”

They looked at each other, both mourning the loss of their families but happy to find solace in each other.

“Hey, Virgil?” Janus asked quietly after a while.

“Yeah?”

“Can I kiss you?”

It felt like they were both still teens and not in their late twenties, but Virgil didn’t mind.

“Please.”

Their lips connected softly, and he thought, maybe he really could find a new home here.

Janus certainly made him feel like he belonged.

[limjaeseven]

Love Me A Little

Pairing: Hongjoong x Mingi

Genre: Angst, s2l

Word Count: 2766

Summary: Hongjoong never really understood love. People had different stories of how it came but for everyone he knew, it stayed a while. For him, love was a fickle thing, a spark of passion fizzling out as fast as it started. He wasn’t happy about it, he wished he could love people the way they loved him, but it felt like that just wasn’t meant for him. That was, until Mingi came around.

Quiz Result: losing your passion and frantically trying to regain it - fever

Warnings: Implied smut, mental breakdowns

[a/n]: Here's my submission for @pirateeznet's first anniversary project! I veered plenty off the prompt but I still hope you enjoy. Thanks @daesukiii for helping me brainstorm this.

It wasn’t like Hongjoong didn’t want to fall in love, didn’t want a long term lover, didn’t want a marriage with a suburban house with a white picket fence and 2.5 kids, it just didn’t happen to him.

He tried, god knows he tried, but liking someone for him was as easy as getting bored with them, meaning his relationships were enjoyable for a short while before he was staying just because he didn’t want to hurt his partner. He tried to be a good lover, but he couldn’t keep his heart in place for very long.

The line of his exes was long, most relationships ending with his boyfriends realising that he just didn’t feel the same way that they did. Maybe a lifetime’s worth of love wasn’t meant for him, he thought.

Finding people wasn't difficult for him, neither was making them stay. The same couldn't be said for his own heart. It made him want to stop looking for people altogether, but the loneliness was too crippling.

"I wish I'd never met you," Jongho had cried the day things ended.

Yunho had left without as much of a note, not that Hongjoong was surprised after the year and change they spent together.

Dating Yeosang was fun for about the first month, then it started getting bad, then progressively worse.

San and Wooyoung felt like but a distant memory, fun while it lasted. They had sought him out to join their relationship but all he did was remind him why they were better off together.

A sigh left Seonghwa's lips as he watched his best friend sulk in the corner of his cafe, at a table unofficially reserved for him. "Your dull face is going to drive all the customers away." He said as he placed Hongjoong's tea in front of him.

"Leave me alone, I'm grieving," Hongjoong muttered.

Seonghwa sat down in front of his friend and asked, "Grieving what, Joong? We've been over this so many times."

"I'm grieving my sorry ass." It had been months since San and Wooyoung broke up with him but it still stung somewhere deep down. He couldn't blame them, he would have done the same if he was in their place, but he didn't know how to fix things. "Am I just aro, Hwa?"

"You know that's a question only you can answer." Hongjoong groaned and covered his face with his hands. "If you're asking me if I think you're aro, then no. What you had with Yeonjun in high school felt too real to be anything short of love to me."

Hongjoong had to agree. Choi Yeonjun was the only person who Hongjoong had actually, legitimately loved in his life. They never dated, conservative school and all, but still, they shared something special. Once Hongjoong graduated, though, they naturally drifted apart and that was the end of it.

Sometimes he tries to psychoanalyse himself and wonders if that incident left him irrevocably scarred or something. But he didn’t really feel different. Maybe it was about finding the right person, he thought. But that made him feel worse because what were the chances that he’d find “the right one”?

He groaned into his tea, making Seonghwa ruffle his hair comfortingly before getting back to his work. Hongjoong just wanted to not be and feel alone, but he couldn’t tell if that was in his stars for him.

Mingi happened by a sheer stroke of luck. Hongjoong gets chills when he thinks about it, how easy it would have been for him to miss him entirely. Hongjoong had decided to take an impromptu vacation, taking a week off work and booking the first flight out of the country he could find.

It happened to be a ticket to Japan he could barely afford but he had had a terrible month at work and everything was just going wrong so he threw all his critical thinking skills out of the window and was left with eight hours to pack and no return ticket booked.

Despite the time and the immediacy of his plan, he almost missed his flight because he fell asleep in the middle of sorting out his clothes out while lounging on his bed. He hadn’t prebooked his seat so he got the only free one remaining on the flight, which happened to be between a teenager who wasn’t able to get a seat with his mother and an old man who was snoring loud enough for Hongjoong to still hear it through his headphones.

He wanted to curse his fate when a tall man came walking towards him, and for a moment Hongjoong felt frozen in place. The man was really attractive, like absurdly so. His seat also happened to be next to the teenager’s mother’s. He very politely agreed to swap seats with her son and there he was, sitting next to Hongjoong looking like he just walked off a runway.

“Can I help you?” Hongjoong had to take a second to realise he was shamelessly staring at the man next to him.

He shook his head and turned away, grabbing the book he’d stashed away in the seat pocket in front of him to occupy himself. He didn’t bother checking which book it was, just grabbed whatever was on top of his shelf as he was running out of his house. It happened to be his copy of ‘The Picture of Dorian Gray’, a well loved one at that, with the spine broken in and the cover chewed up in the corners.

“Oscar Wilde? Good choice,” The man next to him commented.

Hongjoong let himself look at him again before responding, “Yeah I picked this up in high school and fell in love with it.” He reached his hand out to the man. “Hongjoong.”

“Mingi, pleasure to meet you.” The man replied, a bright smile breaking out on his face.

They talked non stop for the two hours of their flight. Things were so comfortable with Mingi. He was warm and immediately disarming. Hongjoong got a good laugh out of the facial expression Mingi made when he told him about how he landed up on that particular flight.

They had exchanged numbers and promises to meet each other over dinner by the time they had collected their bags and headed out to their respective hotels.

Mingi was in Japan on his dream trip, Hongjoong found out. He had originally planned it with his boyfriend but they ended up breaking up before it came to fruition but Mingi wasn’t going to let that get in the way of checking an important item off his bucket list.

“I could accompany you,” Hongjoong offered casually, “If you’d be okay with that, that is. It’s not like I have anything planned anyways.”

“I would love that,” Mingi said immediately. And so it was decided, a last minute vacation had turned into a sight seeing opportunity with an extremely hot man who not only was single, but also into men. Hongjoong knew it probably wasn’t the best idea to try flirt with Mingi not that long after his breakup, but he wouldn’t turn the man down if he wanted to try something,

And try they did. It took three days of them spending basically every waking moment together but they eventually got there. Mingi had invited Hongjoong back to his hotel after a day spent roaming around the fashion district of the city. They were planning to dine at the restaurant but given how exhausted they were, they ended up crashing on Mingi’s bed and ordered room service.

“Are you dating anyone?” Mingi asked out of nowhere, his eyes glued to the television playing some reality show they could barely understand the rules of.

Hongjoong turned to look at Mingi, his face lit by the glow of the screen, highlighting his features in a delectable way. “No,” He said.

“Anyone you like?”

“No.”

“Any on and offs? ‘Maybe-but-not-really?”

“No.”

Mingi took a deep breath before turning to Hongjoong, “Can I kiss you?”

“Oh my god just do it already.” They were rolling on the bed in a tangle of limbs within seconds, soft lips sharing passionate kisses. Hongjoong didn’t realise how much fun just kissing someone could be till Mingi.

Hongjoong didn’t go back to his own hotel that night.

The week felt like a dream that Hongjoong didn’t want to wake up from. Basking in Mingi’s glow felt like a slice of heaven he couldn’t let go of. But time ran out, and suddenly Hongjoong was hit with the reality that they had to go back to their lives, working cities apart with busy schedules and commitments that left them with little time for themselves.

He couldn’t get himself to ask Mingi what they were before leaving. They were supposed to leave on the same flight but Hongjoong had his pulled back last minute and he left without a word.

Hongjoong didn’t know what to do with himself on the flight back to Korea. He knew he was making a mistake, he knew he was running away from something that could maybe work for once, but he didn’t think he had it in him to find out. He was too scared to see something beautiful fall to ruin because his heart would eventually grow bored of that too, and he’d be back at square one, a lot more scarred and no less lonely.

For the next week straight he refused to go anywhere but to work or the local grocers. Seonghwa had to practically break his door down to get him to even say a word to him. “What is up with you, Joong?” He questioned, his voice accusatory. “You leave and come back without a word. I’ve been so worried about you. Couldn’t you have responded to my texts or heck, come to the cafe and showed your face so that I know you’re still alive instead of having to call your coworkers to check in on you?”

Hongjoong sat dazed on his sofa as Seonghwa shouted at him, his face impassive, barely registering that his friend was even there, much less what he was saying. “Hyung,” he said finally when Seonghwa stopped. “Hyung,” he repeated before breaking down in sobs.

He cried like he had never before. Seonghwa rushed to hold him tightly, rocking him gently as he tried to get Hongjoong to calm down but it wasn’t working. Hongjoong was a mess of tears, wails and panicked breaths, barely holding together.

“I’m so scared, hyung,” he muttered over and over again, his voice coming out in a wet warble. Seonghwa held onto Hongjoong tighter, whispering reassurances into his ears. It took a long time for his breathing to even out and his tears to stop but eventually he was lulled into an uneasy rest.

“You should call him, you know?” Seonghwa told him the next morning over breakfast. Hongjoong had broken down once more when he woke up and finally spilled everything.

“I just can’t. He didn’t try to contact me either, and I honestly don’t blame him.”

“The longer you wait, the harder it will get.”

Hongjoong paced around the kitchen, hands wringing nervously, “Hyung, he’s perfect. I can’t watch myself falling out of love with him. Not for him and not for me.”

“Then don’t,” Seonghwa said simply. “Don’t fall out of love with him. Try with everything you have in you. If it still happens, then that’s just what fate has in store for you. But to let go of something so precious for an outcome you don’t know for sure will happen, what a waste.”

Hongjoong didn’t know what to say to that. He stared at his phone as Seonghwa left. A picture of Mingi at one of the shrines they visited together stared back at him. He reached over to turn the screen off.

A week turned into two, then three, and before Hongjoong knew it had been over two months since he’d been back from the trip. He was sure Mingi had forgotten all about him by now. That was at least his hope, because he knew it was more likely that he hated Hongjoong with every fibre of his being for what he did to him.

He was in the middle of walking home when he crossed a boutique with a display of clothes that reminded him a lot of the way Mingi dressed. Stopping in front of the store window, he gazed over the mannequins, memories of their time together flashing in his mind.

The way Mingi had walked around the town in a loud shirt that Hongjoong had happily ripped off his body in the comfort of the new hotel room they had gotten together. He remembered the way Mingi had smiled when Hongjoong took more pictures of him than of the places they were visiting and how those smiles turned warmer when it was just the two of them curled together in their bed, their faces a mere breath away.

On impulse he stepped inside the shop. The counter was empty, the door behind it slightly ajar. Hongjoong found a rack of belts and felt the leather between his fingers. The image of him hastily unbuckling one from Mingi’s waist and throwing away crept on him that he didn’t notice someone step out of the open door and stand behind him.

“How can I help you, sir?” A familiar voice asked and Hongjoong felt his entire body seize up. He couldn’t get himself to move or say a word. “Are you okay, sir?” Mingi’s deep voice asked, and Hongjoong couldn’t muster even a sound as Mingi walked around to face him.

The shock on his face when he recognised Hongjoong was comical. He looked like he had seen a ghost, his lips parted and his voice caught in his throat.

“Mingi,” Hongjoong finally managed to say. And just like that the floodgates fell open. “Mingi, Mingi, Mingi, Mingi,” he chanted, unable to stop himself.

He could barely remember what happened but next thing he knew, Mingi had him wrapped ina crushing hug. “Why did it take so long?” He heard Mingi ask. Hongjoong just held onto him tighter, too afraid to let go.

“Why aren’t you mad at me?” Mingi smiled, taking Hongjoong’s hand into his own, running his thumb over his knuckles.

“No offence but I didn’t expect someone who booked and almost missed a flight to a random country in less than eight hours to be the most well adjusted person out there.” Hongjoong wanted to protest what Mingi was saying but he knew there was no point. “A part of me knew I’d wake up in that bed alone. It also knew that if I tried to get in touch with you, you’d just shut down. So all I could do was wait.”

“But I was so terrible to you, weren’t you hurt?”

“Oh I was plenty hurt, right after my ex too, but I wasn’t mad. I just couldn’t find it in me to be angry with you.”

Hongjoong raised Mingi’s hand to his lips almost reverently and placed a soft kiss on the back of it. “I don’t deserve you,” he whispered.

“I don’t care what you deserve or not, Hongjoong. I want you, if you want me too.” Mingi looked at Hongjoong with such a burning passion that he couldn’t help but speak his heart.

“I want you so bad, Mingi. With every fibre of my being,” he said. “Every time I look at you I had to remind myself that I’m not dreaming. I just wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I hurt you again.”

“I wouldn’t forgive you either, and it would hurt me a lot if you rejected me right now. So just say yes. What has to happen will happen. Don’t let that stop you from being happy.”

Hongjoong closed his eyes and let himself wash away all his worries in the wave of Mingi’s presence. “Yes, a thousand times over.”

[pumpkin-spike18]

✨Weekly Progress 2022 #54✨+Demo 2.0 coming 1/28/23!

Colored 3 BGs

Colored 2 BGs

Made first pass of comments from proofreading

New list of remaining work for Jan.

Updated the BG +affected code in Demo 1.0 (basic changes)

This is it, new year starting soon. Will it somehow have 54 weeks again 🤔

I actually normally write my weekly progresses on Sunday, then schedule them for Wednesday so it looks like I have a post for every indie dev hour haha~ But since the last day of the year lands on a Sunday, I figure I can publish now.

And as alluded in the title, the release date for Demo 2.0 is set for 1/28/2023! More info on what the update entails can be found here!

I have all the art assets done, but as I made a list of all the things I have left to do, it was half a page. =v=; There's a few changes that I intend for the script since I finished writing it. Ideally, these changes shouldn't take long at all! But I wanted to be sure so I ended up extending the release date a bit.

2022 & 2023 ✨

While I'm at it, I want to talk about the past year and the next one too.

The past year really has been a whirlwind of fun 😁 I never expected SYVNH to be as popular as it has been and I'm really grateful for everyone's support so far! It has been my main focus for most of the year, but I spent some time participating in other jam projects as well! I took on a variety of roles for:

We Were Forever

Lachesis V Atropos

ALICE

Mythic Meetup

Nature's Lament

All of which can be found on my itch.io page!

I was hoping to do a little more for the full year, project-wise, but the scope for SYVNH blew up pretty fast on me. But I still did find time to write for a couple unannounced projects (that hopefully I'll be able to work more on 2023)!

Upcoming for 2023, of course, my number one goal is finishing SYVNH!

Other smaller art goals include:

Illustration sets

More fanart!

Make a short animated MV

Learn to use blender and live2D

General art improvement

I both love and miss drawing fanart for all my favorite series. I hope I'll be able to get back into it in 2023. Additionally, I want to spend some time making tutorials to teach others to do some of the things I do! Lastly, I want to improve my art skill. I've spent so much time on digital art that I've been lacking in things like painting and 3D craft making. So it's time to spend more time on that.

I haven't quite figured out how to split my time to complete all of that yet, but hey! That's what the new year's for, right? 😄

Happy New Year, everyone! Thanks for this year and I look forward to the next one!

[angel-of-arson]

Edith-Solaire's Timeline-

2004 May 17th Waning Crescent

--Mary was born by Linda Jewels, she is the only child of Linda Jewels. The father was chased away, Theodore Celedon. Linda had gone against her Mother's rules and fell in love with a Shifter, although unknowingly so. After getting impregnated by him she found out and severely regretted it and ran him away.

2010 May 10th

--Mary began having symptoms of Pre-Invoked Shifting Syndrome(P.I.S.S), she was able to control it very well until some girls at her christian school started teasing her, she then began failing some of her classes. Which caused even more stress.

--Edit #1-A Empathy Demon, Caelum, had reported to us that he was assigned to take Charge of her, but it ended quite quickly. He wants her as a Charge again when she is much better, we agreed to this terms.

2011 March 18th

--At age seven she was beginning to be tortured by Linda, as her mother believed she was a demon, tainted by sin and she must cleanse her. The reason she began to do this was because her Mother, Lily Jewels, was a Shifter, she was given the same treatment and was ‘fine’. 

--A day prior she told a friend of hers, Brayan who then told her mother out of concern, Linda then turned to her own mother and asked for help. Lily told her what she must do, as her own mother had once done. 

--Edit #1-Strangely we looked into the family tree at some point at least one woman had sexual relations with a Shifter, left the them and gave birth to a Shifter. This seems to be generational trauma at least many women have.

--Edit #2-A while later we found out that Caelum the Empathy Demon was posing as Bryan as he didn’t know how else to help her with her troubles. That is why he was taken out of caring for her, he thought if he helped Linda then she would look for help. Not torture her only child.

2012 August 14th

--At age eight on this day she burned down the house and went into the woods, she had fully shifted in order to escape and was stuck as a wolf. The reason for the house burning down was Mary’s response to her mother’s berating of the fire of hell. Her core was responding to the danger and attempted to protect herself. 

--Edit #1-Researchers were sent to the location with permission of William-Solaire at a much later date, as he owns the land. What they found was an imprint of frantic and pure chaotic magic left behind by ‘Mary’. It seems her Core exploded, that is the term we are using right now as there is no such thing as this happening before.

2013 June 23rd

--She found an actual wolf pack and joined it, on June 25 2013 she fought the Alpha and became the leader instead. This is quite unusual as it is not the natural order. She caused the order to collapse but she otherwise led it very well. Nine years old.

--Edit #1-At a later date we tracked the pack itself and studied the behavior, it seems she permanently changed the structure of these wolves. It hasn’t caused a disruption of the ecosystem so we let them go.

2013 September 2nd

--At age nine she was found by a shifter family who tried to help her, but she was in a state of animalistic behavior and killed them. The family consisted of a Mother, Father, and two grown sons, the Mother spotted her and alerted the Father. 

--They soon gathered their sons to attempt to soothe her. She charged at them and killed them one by one. When the pack found out she had led shunned her out and she spent time alone.

--Edit #1-William has been informed and he sent apologies to the family, and asked for his daughter to be forgiven. The family had given them their forgiveness, not blaming the young child, but instead blaming Linda.

--Edit #2-The family was asked not to release this information about Linda as that would may cause a disruption in the child's progress on getting better.

2014 October 8th

--On this day she trespassed on King William-Solaire, 545 year old vampire, who then tranced her inorder to make her shift back. She was littered with scars, from her mother, wolves and the fire, she also had some claw marks around her neck, wrist and behind her ears. 

--She then fainted from the sudden realization that she was older, not at her burning home, and that she had finally had her humanity back. 

--At the hospital she was then taken care of until she was deemed safe. 

--She was given severe exposure therapy and we had to reverse all the Christian values that were embedded in her mind. She was ten years of age as of documenting her life.