#but no a lot of y’all ignore miles and his character

[starlooove]

A lot of y’all see Miles as “one of the good ones” and it shows

[tinkerbelle05]

How about a 1016 miles x fem reader where his mom catches them kissing in his room 😭😭 I feel Rio would not play

Caught Red Handed

Characters: 1610!Miles Morales x Black!Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluff & slight Angst

Summary: (Requested) Thanks beautiful ♥️

Warnings: awkwardness, snooping parents, Rio’s rage

A/N: Omg Rio would never play like that. I think it took a lot of convincing for you and Miles to be in the same room. Welp that's gone now. Also for my own peace of mind, Miles and Reader is 16+

You loved kissing Miles. You loved leaving a trail of kisses on his jaw, traveling down to his neck, and traveling further down into the depths of his collarbone.

You were doing it right now. Both of you laying on his bed with you draped over his body and his hands on your thighs for stability. You heard a chuckle under his breath and you paused to look at him.

“That made you tickle,” it was more of a statement, an observation really, than a question. He didn’t answer, just avoided your eyes. You took your finger and lightly trailed leaving goosebumps in it’a wakes, leaving him a laughing mess.

“You're such a tease,” he grumbles and kisses your lips.

The both of you were so entrapped in your own world that you didn’t hear Miles’ door opening, and you most definitely didn’t notice Rio standing at the doorway with lunch in her hands.

“What are you two doing?!” You hear a yell. It sounded too much like Ms. Morales for your liking.

Both of you froze with fear and slowly turned around to see a fuming Ms. Morales. She was gripping the tray for dear life and fierce glare on her face.

You practically jump off Miles, white hot embarrassment fills every part of your body. You avoid her line of sight as you brace yourself for the inevitable verbal lashing. You don’t even dare to look at Miles, not even a secret glance in his general direction.

“So this is why y’all wanna keep the door closed all the time huh?” She questions and laughs in a mocking tone.

“Mom-“

“Don’t,” she cuts him off harshly. She closes her eyes and pinches the bridge of her nose. She opens them and they land in the space between you and Miles. “Have you two..?”

“No, we haven't,” Miles answers quickly, and somehow your embarrassment grew deeper.

She gives out a sigh and pinches her nose, ��Okay, okay that's good because I will not become a grandmother right now, do you both understand?”

Both of you nod in unison. There was something more terrifying about her calm rage. It made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up in anxiety.

She clears her throat, “Since neither of you clearly paid enough attention during sex-ed in school, I will re-teach you.”

“Huh? Mami please no. You really don’t have to,” Miles protested while you sink further into despair.

She ignores Miles and grabs a chair to sit in, “Okay so when..”

This was going to be a long night but it could definitely have been worse.

“Oh and you both are severely grounded for at least a month,” she adds before she continues on.

It was one of the worst 30 minutes of your life. Ms. Morales went really in depth on every subject related to sex education. The diseases you could catch, different methods of practicing safe sex, and the consequences of failing to do so. She painted horrifyingly graphic demonstrations too.

By the end of it, all you wanted to do was go home and erase this idea from your memory forever.

And at the end, she said, “Now maybe a month from now, after some reflection I can trust you two to be in the same room with the door open. But not right now. Do you need a ride home?” She turned to you, her gaze and voice softer than it was a moment ago

You quickly shake your head no and grab your things. As much as a car ride home would beat the 2 trains and a bus commute you had, your already cringing at the thought of how awkward and tense the car ride would be.

“No, no it’s fine Ms. Morales, I can get home on my own,” you tell her and with a quick goodbye to both of them, you were out the door.

Halfway through your train ride home and the Renaissance album you get a text from Miles. You were surprised he still has his phone.

“I’m sooo sorry for that. Shoulda locked the door next time. I'll make it up to you, promise 🙏🏿”

“I'll hold it to you Morales”

Tags: @butterfi, @justbeethings, @jam-skullz, @zomb1te, @dreamxcollide, @shibble, @sciamachy-after-dusk @sleepdeprivationis4coolkids, @somber-starz, @maypersonne, @peter-parkers-gf, @hoeboat101, @rosebunny, @liural, @midnight-the-shadow-wolf, @mur-docs, @eight-cats-in-a-box@emgavi, @sawi-06, @707xn, @niktwazny303, @nagi3seastorm, @ghostsimp000, @cloudstrifefantatic, @vixqn, @mewxzx, @yourtsahik, @targaryenstormborn, @spider-bren, @star-light18464, @im-jisoo-im-okay, @wraithlueintheirlittleworld, @andhdi68a, @itstooearly-its3am, @universallypeanutpizzapersona, @gricelovesu, @pavitrsgf, @avatarl0v3r, @ca1ist0, @randomhoex, @nerdyparker616, @1uvvmi, @keawio, @centipider, @ellatienesuscosas, @m4rihrts, @jell0buss-37, @baddiebehaviourxx, @laylasbunbunny, @minimari415

Taglist & Anonlist & Reqs Info & Masterlist

[fifteenth-entity]

ABT CHAIPUNK/PUNKFLOWER AND SHIPS LIKE THAT

MAJOR EDIT SINCE THIS DEBATE IS NOW ROCKETING THE OTHER DIRECTION AND THAT’S NOT GOOD EITHER

I HEADCANON PAVITR AND HOBIE AS ADULTS. IF THAT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE, GO AHEAD AND BLOCK OR IGNORE ME, I DON’T MIND (NOT THAT MY OPINION MATTERS HERE). JUST MAKE SURE WHATEVER CONTENT YOU CONSUME MAKES YOU COMFORTABLE.

I’m aware that, especially on tumblr, a lot of these fans are on the younger side. It’s honestly so nice to see tumblr youngins be as mature as need be in these situations, with fact-checking and everything. However, I feel the need to remind y’all that since Hobie’s age is up for interpretation, that means that people are gonna HC him as adults. WHICH IS FINE, BTW. A lot of us HC Hobie and other characters as adults from experience, seeing as we’ve met many people on the older side who act more like Pav and Hobie than Gwen and Miles. Please don’t harass anyone who sees Hobie as an adult regardless of what has been confirmed or not.

THIS IS ALL TO SAY: THE POST CIRCULATING ABOUT HOBIE’S AGE WAS VERY MISLEADING. NOTHING IS CANON ABOUT HIS AGE IN ATSV, EXCEPT FOR THE FACT THAT HIS DESIGN CHOICES WERE TAKEN AFTER 19/20 YR OLDS AND THAT’S IT. DON’T GATEKEEP HEADCANONS, AND BLOCK ANY WEIRDOS WHO SHIP ADULT CHARACTERS WITH CHARACTERS MORE THAN 2 YEARS YOUNGER THAN THEM. (OR MINOR CHARACTERS WITH CHARACTERS 2 YEARS OLDER THAN THEM)

Original post under the cut

i just gotta get this off my chest/mind and put it out into the world

yeah, a director “confirmed” hobie’s age to be 19-20 yrs old

but this movie is all about “fuck canon” LMAOOO

SO WHO CARES how old he is? I personally see him as a 19 yr old, and i see pavitr as 18 and in his last grade of highschool, which is why i ship them to begin with

I UNDERSTAND punkflower shippers who see hobie as underage, that’s totally fine! we’re already fucking up “canon” which, lets be fr, for “underground” spidermen isnt really sturdy canon now is it

AS LONG AS THE SHIPPER MAKES THE SHIP LEGAL AND NOT PROSHIP, i believe “ship away”! JUST DONT IMPOSE YOUR SHIPS ON OTHER PEOPLE and have fun!!

that’s it, that’s all, this debate is gonna get headachy very fast

[sing-me-under]

I have a lot of posts about how I liked the finale and it was not OOC, but that’s on a stance of consistency, not storytelling and meta narrative. The finale is consistent with their characters (except Punz but that’s a whole other rant). I think the ending was far from well written (because the dialogue was fucking improv on a time limit). It’s definitely not handled well on the meta, but I think it Makes Sense. I don’t defend the finale because I think it was great. I defend it because I see a lot of poorly interpreted takes or just straight up neg.

I think I’ve accidentally come off as a c!Dream apologist or a c!Tommy anti at first glance even though I’m quite literally the opposite of both if anyone actually reads my long form rants (because they are rants under the thin veil of analyses; I am just throwing words at a keyboard without any central idea). If given a gun, I wouldn’t hesitate to shoot c!Dream between the eyes, and I’m literally a cc!TommyInnit main. He is literally the only steamer/youtuber I watch regularly (anymore) despite being the kind of person who prefers to flitter through content topics rather than dedicate to a specific channel or streamer.

Criticism where criticism is due, and I love reading crit and neg and I agree with so much of it, but I’m not the kind of person to reiterate what other people are already saying. You can criticize the execution of the finale all you want and I Agree With You. It’s terribly executed! But I’m going to ignore the terrible execution and the unintentional framing because it’s been beat to death by now, so let me shove what I liked about it down everyone’s throat.

I don’t intake the DSMP from the perspective of someone expecting a professionally written story. I’m watching it knowing that this is an improv told by amateur storytellers, one of whom is literally a comedian and the other who has the self awareness of a very small dog.

I don’t expect a perfect execution, but I know it’s well meaning. I think people are so desperate to hate sometimes that they forget that the whole existence of the DSMP is out of a place of love and passion for the story they’re telling. It wouldn’t have gone on this long if it weren’t for a genuine love for what they do, and we have seen first hand how other projects die on so so many occasions.

I think the DSMP (especially Tommy and Dream’s finale) deserves to at least receive some praise for what the content creators intended rather just neg upon neg, a lot of which are by people who didn’t even watch the finale. There’s a whole section of the community who loved the ending when it was first streamed, but I didn’t see anyone else actually talking about why it was good other than “Staged Duo My Beloved” and “Tommy is a good person!” like YOURE ALSO MISSING THE POINT. THIS IS THE SAME BULLSHIT STEVEN UNIVERSE FANS PULLED.

Tommy was a flawed individual who was facing his abuser and his trauma right as he was at death’s door but Tommy Didn’t Forgive Dream For The Shit He Did. You don’t fucking forgive abusive power hungry narcissists for literally killing and torturing you. But y’all are so eager to go straight to Murder just because it’s an actual option, but in the DSMP, murder is still framed as a Very Bad Thing to do rather than just some unfavorable activity that people take part in. It’s just that there’s no consequence for commuting the Very Bad Thing other than the degradation of your morals (WHICH AGAIN EVERYONE IS MORALLY GREY AND I COULD GO ON A WHOLE RANT ABOUT TOMMY AND THE THEMATIC IMPORTANCE OF HIM NOT KILLING PEOPLE)

But the prison literally failed! So what do you do if both prison AND murder are off the table?? You move on. That’s what you fucking do. You pick the perpetrator up by the scruff of his neck, strip him of everything that gives him any power, give him a licensed therapist or seven, then put him behind a white picket fence in fucking Wyoming literally miles away from the nearest person, and you at least try to live your life.

Tommy literally couldn’t move on because he was haunted by the very Concept of Dream. Even if he picked up his bags and moved to the other side of the universe, he’d be haunted by the fear that Dream would find him somehow because that’s how paranoia works. Instead, Tommy chose to understand the cause of his Fear so that he could get some control over it, so that he could close his eyes for once and get some fucking sleep. Although this entire time he knew it was a futile effort because they’d be dying anyway, but for once in his goddamn life, he deserved to at least feel some relief from the heavy burden that was his self (although this was mostly everyone) perceived Crime Of Existing.

GIVE THE GUY A FUCKING BREAK.

ITS NOT FUCKING VICTIM BLAMING AND NO ONE IS FORGIVING DREAM EXCEPT THE BATSHIT CRAZY DREAM APOLOGISTS. NOT EVEN CC DREAM IS FORGIVING CDREAM BECAUSE CDREAM IS A PIECE OF SHIT THAT SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED ANY AUTHORITY OR NEAR CHILDREN.

[epcot-anthony]

He’s been in this business since 1994– not having a big break until this is us doesn’t mean anything. Especially not in our industry where it’s about who you know lol. And it doesn’t mean she would have more jobs (if she doesn’t want them) it just means she’s got it and she’s secure— also some people are just very selective about what they do and aren’t trying to rush into project after project so her not being in a lot of stuff doesn’t really mean a lot.

THIS RESPONSE IS LONG SORRY I AM PASSIONATE!!

that’s very true. ron for sure has connections, but i’d still say he’s hardly famous. i think he’s def known and people know his face, but in recent years it’s this is us that’s helping him off. i think if he was really a huge star with a lot of connections, she would be in many more things. y’all see ben platt?? she’s just..a very very VERY low level nepo baby if we’re even calling her that lol. she is probably only benefiting from the connections that he gave her through bringing her to things as a child.

i’m gonna be mean here so you can ignore this if you want. i get really confused when she says she’s selective and only picks roles that are showing that women are more than just being with a man. like i defended her on this for SO long and tried to justify it, but it’s hard now. it confuses me because in recent years her roles have been tyisha and ashley. i think #freerayshawn was a very very important project and i have absolutely no issue with her being in that role. i think they did a great job making tyisha a way to see how police brutality affects families. but, she didn’t have her own personality. her characters purpose was to give us a side to see which is a great purpose, but ultimately she was just his wife in that role. now with miss ashley rose..i’m ngl it’s hard to defend this one. it’s really difficult for me to say that ashley is a character that’s yay women and she stands up for herself and she’s got a whole life outside of her man. because..she doesn’t. sadly, they wrote her in a way where she is an extension of miles. as much as i want to believe she’s not, she is. they have made her obsessed with miles and when they even try to branch out and show her personality, we go right back to miles. i hope this season they’ll do better and i can change my opinions. all of that is just to say that yeah..she can say she’s being selective..but i don’t think her selectiveness makes sense? like she’s not picking these amazing, life changing roles. blindspotting is her first leading role. if she was being selective, she would have not taken minor roles. all in all, i think if she wants to work, she probably shouldn’t be selective.

[notsogreatpotoo]

hopefully i don’t word this wrong, love y’all

1, he literally does steal stuff in the movie. that’s how he got the ingredients for the diy inter-dimensional travel watch.

2, go steal from a big exploitative company, i beg of you, then tell me that wasn’t the punkest fucking shit. (also, not morally wrong. eat the rich before they eat you.)

3, it would be racism if it was framed narratively that Hobie steals things because he’s black. it’s not framed like that, it’s framed that he steals things as a fuck you to the Spider Society.

4, it would also be racism if Hobie was the only black character and stole things. sure, his character traits justify it, but if your only representation of a group (especially one that has been systematically and historically persecuted, underrepresented, and made into caricatures rather than characters) is reinforcing a negative and harmful stereotype, it doesn’t matter how much justification you cram in to explain it. but Hobie isn’t the only black character, and other black characters are also multidimensional characters that have complex personalities and are not him copy-pasted slightly to the side.

5, there’s this one post i’ve seen about how it’s racist to assume that Miles shoplifts that I really like. why is that different, you ask? because shoplifting (and theft in general) doesn’t fit with Miles’s character. graffiti is his form of expression and leaving his mark on the world, which does not equate to him stealing, because though it might seem like a similar thing, the motivation is different. also, Miles is still very trusting in the law, despite being a vigilante. his dad’s a fucking cop, and a lot of his perspective is filtered through that lens of copaganda. this is just one example, but you see the huge difference between Hobie and Miles and how that affects their individual choices? yeah, that’s called good and distinctive character development, not racism.

6, it’s also okay to dislike stereotypes being perpetuated for any reason, even if it fits with the character and the narrative being constructed in a way that isn’t racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, anti-Semitic, etc. for example, i always hated the ´feisty/otherworldly and strange’ (usually women) or ‘awkward/undateable’ (usually men) stereotypes that i would see most ginger characters being shoved into. even seeing other ginger characters that weren’t like this (which was rare lol) didn’t help because i had red hair and i didn’t like the comparison. i never liked Napoleon Dynamite, partially for this reason. do i understand that it makes sense that a movie trying to capture a specific, authentically awkward teenage experience is going to have an awkward main character? yes. is it okay that this movie decided to characterize him like this? yes. do i like it? no. but i don’t have to. i have a ginger friend who loves that movie, because ultimately, different people identify with different representation. ultimately, you are free to dislike it, but that doesn’t mean the people who like it and the people who created it are in the wrong. you probably think you’re usually in the right, but there also aren’t always sides.

7, don’t feel bad if you thought the original take (the assumption that Hobie steals is racist) was correct. we’re all learning about how best to respect each other and grow an accepting, intelligent, and informed perspective. if i said anything wrong here, please let me know so i can learn too!!!

8, fuck racism, and fuck people who purposefully spread misinformation and ignore the voices of those affected so they can tell you what is ‘actually’ problematic, which often further isolates and alienates people.

TL;DR: good post op, sorry for stealing it to make my own

anyway I saw the lukewarm take that it's racist to assume Hobie steals things and I appreciate the abundance of caution there but. tell me you've never met a punk without telling me you've never met a punk lmao.

[sugarcubetikki]

I’ve been seeing people in the st fandom being super ignorant and refusing to understand our frustration with the whole byler situation and will’s storyline this volume and it’s pissing me off.

People are like:

“it makes sense for the 80s and it’s realistic in terms of will’s character”

“y’all are being obnoxious and overreacting you should’ve known that they were going to go with mileven and you should’ve seen the queerbaiting from a mile away”

“you all were so confident and trapped in your delusions it’s not queerbaiting you just make it to be you’re only upset because requited byler isn’t canon”

Like please shut up I don’t wanna hear any of these takes because they genuinely don’t know what they’re talking about.

It’s not about the fact if it’s the 80s or if Will’s behaviour was realistic in terms of his character! It was about the narrative choice here to make him in love with Mike and only use that love to encourage and push Mileven’s relationship forward. It was only used for his suffering and pushing their relationship forward and whether or not he gets a separate storyline for his sexuality arc in S5. If Mileven’s their endgame ship, they built it up using Will’s feelings for Mike through that painting scene as a tool for him to eventually confess to El in the end and that will always be problematic regardless of whether it’s realistic in the 80s or not it’s the writing choice for this storyline that’s the issue when they could’ve conveyed Will struggling to come into terms with his sexuality because of the time period in so many other different ways rather than using it as a tool to promote their straight ship. It sends us the message that queer people are inferior to straight people and them repressing their feelings is something that can be used to feed into straight relationships and that it’s normal and okay because this is what happens this is how queer people struggle but no this is not okay at all this isn’t good representation it’s horribly problematic and queer people’s feelings shouldn’t be used as tools and you should take into account that these queer suffering storylines being written by straight men is actually very homophobic.

Secondly, we are not being obnoxious like we have every right to be mad here for being queerbaited. It shouldn’t be our fault for being queerbaited it’s the their fault for doing it. We’re still apart of a marginalised community and we still have to fight for our rights and still have to fight for representation and good queer representation onscreen is so important because it makes a lot of us feel so validated because we get such little of it in this heteronormative society especially in mainstream media. It’s not our fault if we hope for more. It’s not our fault if we see queer evidence in narrative clues, pay attention to the queer and byler centric marketing and listen to the words of the cast and writers in terms of what they said abt will’s sexuality and byler then end up being fucked over we have every right to be mad if they’re going to queerbait us and use a queer character to promote their straight ship because that’s not okay that’s their fault for doing that and we have every right to be upset. If straight people can hope for straight relationships then queer people can hope for queer relationships but since we’re repressed and have been for years we have to rely on coding and when they do address queer hints/storylines we’re fucked over too many times again and again and straight people just don’t get it.

Lastly, it’s not queerbaiting? it’s not queerbaiting? people don’t know what they’re talking about. It’s not just the subtext and narrative clues/imagery here it’s the marketing and the cast and the writers hyping up will’s sexuality and byler throughout pride month. It can be classed as a queerbait because they said so many things that didn’t even happen! Will’s sexuality wasn’t blatantly addressed it was a coded confession and that was problematically used to lead up to the Mileven love confession too. It’s not only about reciprocated byler being canon or not but the way Will’s sexuality arc was handled too when both of them were being hyped up and we got none. It’s so messed up and even if it’s just us seeing subtext and narrative clues you can’t call us delusional for picking up on strong queer hints within the storyline because there are some things that just don’t make sense to us and you cannot hold us accountable. If you don’t agree, it’s alright but you cannot call us delusional for seeing it that way, and then believing the marketing and the words of the cast and writers because it all makes sense that way to us it’s not delusional cause we have legitimate receipts, proofs and analysis here that aren’t even invalid. If we feel like it’s bad writing and feel angry about it because we can and it is because queerbaiting through promo isn’t okay nor are the problematic queer tropes used within the narrative. Our anger is therefore justified so don’t come at us with your ignorant claims.

[the-archxr]

So, now that I'm freshly widowed (Eddie dearest 😭), what did you think of season 4?? 💕

Well first, my condolences. I haven’t cried that hard at a death in a long time, so I get it 😂

But secondly, I have a lot of thoughts about it, so to sum it up in general (so that way this post isn’t miles long), I feel so-so about it??

I liked it very much (vol 1 more than vol 2) but there were some aspects that I strongly disliked to the point where they were kinda hard to ignore.

Here are just a few I didn’t like (with extra details cause I’m bored and need to rant):

Mike Wheeler (no I will not elaborate. Other than the fact that Mike from season 3 on is not the fucking heart of the group.)

other than Noah Schnapp’s amazing fucking acting, especially in THOSE two scenes, I didn’t like that Will was pretty much sidelined again. Like considering he’s technically supposed to be the main character (the one the entire show started with and is essentially about), ever since season 3 he’s not really involved at all. Although it seems that with the ending of season 4, he’ll (hopefully) be in season 5 a lot more, so we’ll see how that pans out.

now my least favourite thing that happened this season was the weird Nancy/Steve romance rekindling. Especially since they didn’t really take it anywhere at the ending (not that it would’ve mattered, I still wouldn’t have liked it). The entire thing seemed pointless and completely contradictory to their character development(s) in prior seasons, ESPECIALLY Steve’s. Steve’s whole character arc after him and Nancy’s breakup (and mainly in season 3), was that he moved on from her. Nancy and Steve are great characters, but to each other romantically, they represent the stereotype/the expected partner. Nancy’s whole thing was that she didn’t want to be with Steve because she didn’t want to end up like her parents. Which stems from Steve originally wanting to be with her, making plans at 18 to marry her and have children because that’s what’s expected from his parents. These are things they moved on from up until the Duffers decided to fuck that up, so by bringing it back it just felt empty; like Nancy was just lonely and had nothing better to do, and that Steve can’t possibly be with anyone else who compliments his personality.

and speaking of Steve (even though it isn’t limited to him)… I was really hoping to get some more insight into the lives of others? more character development, or explanations of other underdeveloped characters?? We got a lot with Max (and her story arc was great, don’t get me wrong), but I feel like there’s so much stuff we still don’t know/haven’t seen from others?? For example, since season two, I’ve been dying to see the Harringtons. I get the whole point is they’re never around and they’re shitty people, but I want to see interactions between them and Steve. I want to see Dustin talk about his dad (is he dead, are his parents divorced??), and I want them to address Hoppers ptsd from being in a Russian prison, instead of making jokes about him loosing weight.

Like I said, I really did like this season. But similar to Multiverse of Madness, a lot of it felt like ramped up action sequences without any “meat” behind it.

Then again, this season was to primarily set-up the next one. And with season 5 being the final one, hopefully, they tie up some of these looser ends??

But anyways how did y’all like it??

✨the-archxr thoughts✨

[jjkyaoi]

ASSUMPTIONS ABT YOUR FAVORTIE DSMP!CHARACTER

(yes, the majority of this is projecting, what about it)

C!WILBUR: lmaoooo i can smell the mental illness from a mile away, luv. you half were rooting for villbur because you thought it was hot, but also just ‘cause you wanted to see the explosions, and honestly, valid. you’re probably unintentionally the parent of your friends, and you’re also probably high strung and tense all the fucking time, calm down. you want to protect ghostbur w/ your life, but you severely miss the old wilbur as well— not a day goes by where you don’t think abt the pogtopia arc. “independence or death” is constantly playing in your head. the end of the finale arc— wilbur’s death scarred you more than anything else in this fucking smp, but to cope you make shitposts about it through your tears. please  get therapy 

C!TOMMY: you have ADHD.  half the time you’re just crying abt how tommy deserves better, and you want to thrown down w/ c!dream more than you’ve wanted to throw down w/ any character, ever. valid. you stan c!tommy ‘cause you relate to him and his experiences, but also because he acts a lot  like you and you don’t even fucking realize it. you’re probably the loudest in your friend group and constantly try to bring up the groups spirit, but also you’re extremely insecure and sensitive, and it takea a lot to bring your self esteem up— same, but jesus christ. you’re probably obsessed w/ wilbur and tommy’s relationship more than you should be, and you’d do anything for them to just interact again.

C!TUBBO: you’ve definitely went through a bad friendship breakup in the past, or just generally half trust issues. did i mention that you’re the most nervous person to ever walk the earth? you’re the type of person who pushes people away whenever you’re too busy w/ something / gets overstressed w/ something you think you need  to do that you just end up unintentionally ruining friendships. also, you’re shit at texting, i can just smell it. you lowkey felt annoyed at how c!tubbo wass treated in the beginning of l’manberg, and you’re a dadschlatt stan— daddy issues who? you’re ignoring the festival. but, you’re also torn between wanting captainsparkles to be his dad-- infinite dads.

C!NIKI: half the time you’re the sweetest person in the world, but also holy shit  im afraid of you. you’re the friend that’s either protected by your entire friend group, or you’re the big sibling who’s protecting everyone. you’re quiet most of the time, preferring to be on your own, but you’re surprisingly really fucking good in an argument? you’re constantly upset that niki isn’t getting more time to development as a character, and schlatt’s character frustrated you as much as it did niki— you’d do anything to fucking thrown down w/ him.  i feel like people go to you for advice and you’re the therapist friend, but you do not  know how to handle your own emotions. mood

C!FUNDY: lmaoooo, alright kinnie. honestly, beforehand you probably thought that wilbur and fundy’s relationship was cute before you realized how awful it was, and mood. you want nothing more than good things for this boy, but he constantly gets slapped around and you’re constantly in tears. you’re in denial of what happened at the wedding— fundywastaken is canon in your mind. ,,,,are y’all,,, are y’all okay? i feel like y’all are lowkey intimidating to talk to, but in reality you’re just a socially awkward nerd who thrives  off info dumping on your interests but you’re so used to being overlooked that you’re hesitant. though, you’re definitely petty and are always ready to prove your point in an argument— stubborn as fucking hell, alright. how’s those daddy issues?

C!SCHLATT: i’m torn between laughing at you, and genuinely being concerned for your mental health. you’re definitely the fucking cryptid of the friend group; the one that’s mostly silent but whenever you do speak it’s some wack fucking shit, what do you mean. you’re a lesbian. you’re just—you’re a fucking lesbian. you cover up how you feel w/ a tough bravado but you’re really not, and the slightest things— even if they’re jokes, hurt you deeply and you keep them inside you for years. a lot of repressed rage. you have essays in your drafts about how schlatt wasn’t that bad of a person, and i want them right fucking now. you also miss wilbur and schlatt’s dynamic

C!QUACKITY: hello simp. you’re torn between simping for him, or feeling extreme gender envy. you’re definitely fucking funny— you’re the comedian friend of the group, but you don’t even have to try. did i mention a raging bisexual? you’re a blue gay, through and through. you’re extremely stubborn and set in your opinions, and you’re always willing to go on an hour long debate w/ someone. i feel like you’re extremely protective of your friends as well. you’re in love w/ quackity’s arc rn and you’re frustrated that nobody’s really paying attention to it, because snapping after everything he’s been through is what he deserves in your mind. you have abandonment issues and are unheathily attached to his dynamic w/ karl

[colnerys]

lemme throw a tldr here — it’s just me ranting abt how much i hate dick berman and what he did to kira. also in terms of this blog i will have the divergences to stay more faithful to what nana visitor wanted vs what’s actually portrayed. anyways.

okay, i know i’ve been complaining about this a lot lately but in my defense, i’m also actively rewatching ds/9. full disclosure: i love w.or.f a lot. i relate deeply to his narrative of not feeling quite klingon and not fitting in with humans (the diaspora allegory hits y’all) but i really hate how he was introduced in ds9 as a way to directly undermine kira’s authority, and narratively, you can see him beginning to replace her in the place of the friend group. 

starting s4, you really start to see kira hanging out with dax, julian, and even miles waaaay less than she did in the previous season. instead, she’s replaced by w0rf most of the time —— as if they can’t have more than one “outsider” trying to integrate in the group. to top that off, he’s given the position of being defiant’s executive officer even though kira was the XO since the defiant was brought onto the show. in fact, it’s not even given much thought to it. you don’t see sisko talking to kira about the transition, you don’t see kira’s reaction to it. no, he’s just given that position despite the fact that kira has more experience with the ship, that kira knows the kinks of the defiant, and that kira has the most professional synergy with the engineering team (at least, at that point in canon). 

this makes me think about how nana visitor had anxieties and reservations about bringing w0rf onto ds9 because she didn’t want him to replace kira. w0rf was brought onto ds9 to bring up ratings, and it’s very obvious in retrospect too when we think about how worf’s life on ds9 is never brought up again after the show ended. 

on top of all that, they “physically” softened kira up. this is something we know happened because it was to please the men viewing the show, and the women who’re so into policing other women for not being “feminine” enough. not only do they change her uniform drastically — it’s just her’s too! other bajoran militia members still have their utilitarian uniforms! they have shoulder pads, belts, realistic boots for people who work on their feet all day whilst kira’s wearing fucking booties with heels all because nana visitor “walked like john wayne” 

paying close attention, i see them pushing kira away from her friends and pushing her more towards o/do as if to subtly set them up for a romance plot. to top that off, she has more notable interactions with fucking DUKAT than she does with dax, who we’re supposed to believe is her best friend. the same DAX who provided her with a sounding board of reason (ie. look at “duet - 1x18″). this is also the season where dukat begins to SHAMELESSLY and RELENTLESSLY hit on her, harass her even more than he already does. oh and the cherry on top? she’s paired with shakaar, who was most definitely a grown ass adult man that met her when nerys was a literal child. the obvious inclination of pairing kira with all these men who are significantly older than her starting this season is, as we know, a common and incredibly misogynistic hollywood trope. 

the producer, executive, writer who we shall not name being the main driving force of why kira was changed the way she was makes it hard to ignore the misogyny that drove this change. it’s not what nana wanted, but it was something she had to compromise on because she loved kira. still, i cannot help but to think about the amount of gross storylines that kira’s been thrown into / almost thrown into (ie. romance with .... du....kat)

whilst nana absolutely killed it at kira and did all she could to protect the integrity of her character, she was 100% a victim of 90′s misogyny and in some ways, even homophobia (bc never forget nana and terry wanted kiradax canon :)) 

[drabbles-mc]

Trust Me

Juice Ortiz x F!Reader

Request by @adela-topaz-caelon: So, I love Juice, and I was wondering if you wouldn't mind doing a Juice x Female reader, in which the reader is Opie's younger sister, and helps the club in her own way. She's bubbly, but very ferocious when needs be, and the scenario I have in mind is they've always been attracted to each other, and good friends. When Potter first tries to coerce Juice, she knows something's up, works the truth out of him and goes on this mission for Juice that results in a fluffy coming together

Warnings: language, light angst, Juice being a soft and slightly sad boy

Word Count: 3.9k

A/N: I’m here for all these requests about helping Juice dig himself out of the hole he put himself in during this series haha. Love that for him. Also, this was the most I’ve ever written for Opie as a character and it was actually very enjoyable haha. Hope y’all like this! xo

SOA Taglist: @mijop @garbinge @masterlistforimagines (As always, let me know if you'd like to be tagged!)

You walked across the lot at T-M, scanning the garages for your brother, waiting to see him towering over everyone. He was nowhere to be found, though. With a quiet sigh, you walked up to the garage and waved to get someone’s, anyone’s attention who could give you an answer as to where he was.

Juice had spotted you the second you stepped down out of your car. He jogged over to you, a smile on his face as he met you on the pavement. His grin was one that was impossible not to return. He was wiping grease from the palms of his hands onto his pants so he could hug you without leaving any stains on you.

“Y/N, hey,” he wrapped you in a brief embrace, “All good?”

You stepped back and nodded, “All good. Just looking for Ope? Said he was gonna need help with a couple things tonight and to meet him here.”

Juice nodded, “Think he’s in the clubhouse.”

“Great! Thank you. I’ll see you in a bit,” you flashed him a smile before turning and walking across the lot to the clubhouse.

Juice was left there, unable to do anything besides watch you walk away. He couldn’t help but to be mesmerized by the way you walked, so lightly but with just enough authority to let people know that you weren’t someone to be messed with. Your smile was just inviting enough to let people know that you were kind, but not so disarming that you were setting yourself up to be taken advantage of. If growing up with Opie had taught you anything, it was how to carry yourself.

“You’re askin’ for trouble, brother,” Jax materialized behind him with a chuckle.

“What?” Juice tried to feign ignorance.

“Opie will stomp you out like the bug you are if you ever try to get too close to her.”

Juice shook his head, “I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”

“Sure,” he chuckled and clapped him on the back, “Whatever you say.”

Despite the fact that Jax had just called him out, he still couldn’t make himself walk back to the garage until you had disappeared into the clubhouse, the door shutting behind you. Juice let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. With a shake of his head, he walked back to the truck that he had been working on, his brain now running at a mile a minute with so many different thoughts of you.

Juice had fallen a little in love with you the first time he’d seen you. He hadn’t been in Charming all that long, and was just starting to slip into the role of prospect. He was in the clubhouse, stacking cases of beer behind the bar when you came striding in. It felt like the wind had gotten knocked out of his lungs as he looked you over—he was certain that you had made a wrong turn somewhere. There was no way that a girl like you purposely landed yourself in a place like the Samcro clubhouse.

You’d walked up to the bar, given him a smile that made him weak in the knees, and asked if he had seen your brother.

“Wh-who’s your brother?” he stammered out nervously, now jittery not just from the fact that he thought you were beautiful, but also from the fact that you were the sister of one of the men in the MC.

You laughed as you sat down on the stool directly across from him, “Ah, so you’re the new guy,” you looked him up and down before finally answering his question, “Opie.”

His eyes went wide, “Opie?”

You chuckled, “I know—I got the all the looks and he got all the height. Unfortunate division of genes.”

“Thought I heard trouble,” Opie’s voice cut through the clubhouse before the conversation between you and Juice could continue any further.

You laughed as he walked up behind you, resting his hands down on your shoulders and pulling you back into him, you head resting back against the leather of his kutte. Opie had dismissed Juice, granting himself some privacy to be able to talk to his sister without any interruptions. However as Juice left the clubhouse that day, he knew that you were someone he wasn’t going to be forgetting about any time soon.

The two of you had become friends rather quickly after that. You loved all of the guys in the MC—they were your brothers as much as they were Opie’s. But you couldn’t deny that there was something different about Juice. He had a type of light and kindness emanating from him that you just didn’t see in Charming very often, let alone in the club. Your brother had kept a close, scrutinizing eye on you when the two of you first started spending time together, but as time went on he conceded that maybe it was a good friendship for the both of you. You were level-headed enough to keep Juice reined in, and he kept you from taking yourself too seriously. It took some time, but Opie eventually stopped feeling like he had to constantly be looking over your shoulder whenever you were around Juice.

That first day felt like it was lifetimes ago now, though. You made your way back to the dorms once you didn’t see Opie sitting in the main area of the bar. The door to his room was closed, so you gave it a couple knocks and waited for your cue to enter. A few moments later, Opie pulled the door open and offered up a tired smile as he pulled you into a hug and kissed the top of your head.

“You look like shit,” you said with a laugh as you sat down on his bed.

“Good to see you too,” he chuckled and shook his head, trying to smooth out his extremely disheveled hair.

“Everything alright?”

“Need to ask you for a favor.”

You nodded, assuming that that was where this conversation was going to be heading, “Whatever you need.”

“Got some club business to handle. Most of us are gonna be outta town for a few days. Was wondering if you would be willing to stay here and help keep things running smoothly?”

You shrugged, nodding, “Yea, of course. Who’s gonna have the kids?”

“Mom.”

You nodded, a little surprised that your mother was still willing to take the kids when Opie had club business. You weren’t going to get into that discussion with him, though, “Who else is staying behind?”

“It’s just gonna be you, Chucky, and Juice. Gemma’s got family shit going on so we could really use you here at T-M. Mechanics will still be on deck and everything, but I’d feel better knowing we had someone else here who was Samcro.”

You loved that you got to be part of the inner circle of everything happening with the club. You didn’t get to know everything, but you got to know more than most. The fact that Opie trusted you meant the world to you. There was something exciting about the fact that every now and then he talked about you like you were part of the club.

“I got you,” you said with a nod, “But I’m crashing here. I don’t trust what might be on the sheets in anyone else’s dorms.”

He laughed, “Smart,” he ran his hands over his face, “Thank you, Y/N. I appreciate it.”

“You guys heading out tonight?”

“Couple hours,” he sighed, “Sorry for the short notice.”

You shrugged, “No big deal. We always figure it out,” you stood up and gave him a hug, “I’m gonna go pack some shit to bring here with me for the next few days. I’ll try to be back before you guys head out.”

“Alright. Love you.”

“Love you back,” you called to him as you walked out of his dorm.

Later that afternoon, once all of the guys had peeled out of the compound, you realized just how quiet things were at T-M when they weren’t all around causing trouble. It was peaceful but it also felt a little empty. The chaos is what made it feel like home.

You walked into the clubhouse and saw Juice sitting at the bar, typing furiously away at his laptop. You smiled as you sauntered onto the other side of the bar, grabbing one beer for yourself and one for him, popping the caps off on the edge of the bar. You set his next to his laptop and you saw the smile creep across his face even though he didn’t take his eyes off of the screen in front of him.

“Just you and me for the next few days, Juice,” you said with a smirk.

That got his eyes to flick up to you for a moment. He smiled, a nervous laugh slipping out past his lips, “Looks like it.”

“Don’t look so nervous,” you chuckled, “You know I don’t bite.”

It hit Juice that this was the first time that the two of you were going to be left to your own devices for an extended period of time. The idea of it was exciting and terrifying for him all at once. For years he’d admired you and kept it to himself so he wouldn’t catch any of Opie’s wrath. But he had never been able to shake the feeling that maybe, possibly, you felt the same way about him. He was never bold enough to ask, but there was always a feeling in his gut that his feelings weren’t one-sided. There had never been the chance to even try to discuss it, there were always so many other people around, namely your brother and your father. Neither of those men were people that Juice felt like pissing off.

“You crashing here?” he asked.

You nodded as you sipped on your beer, “Yea. Taking Ope’s room. You?”

He nodded, “Always do when the guys leave town. Someone’s gotta stay here and make sure the bad guys don’t get in,” there was a childish grin on his face.

You laughed, “The bad guys just rolled out of town a few minutes ago.”

The two of you existed peacefully with each other as the afternoon bled over into the evening. You were camped out on the picnic table outside the clubhouse, a drink in one hand and a book in the other. You were laying on your back on top of the table, book perched carefully on your chest as you absorbed another page of the story.

You heard Juice’s phone going off, followed quickly by the sound of him answering it. You wanted to eavesdrop, but he was just a little too far away to be able to make out what he was saying. You sat up on the table, swinging your legs so that your feet landed on the bench. You stretched and waited for Juice to step outside.

He came out a couple minutes later, shrugging a hoodie on over his kutte. You saw the confused look on his face and just as you were about to ask him where he was going, he turned and looked at you, “Be back in a bit. Got some shit I gotta handle.”

“Everything okay?”

He nodded, “Yea. Just lock the gate behind me, don’t want you here by yourself unprotected.”

You agreed, fighting the urge to ask all of the questions that were bubbling up in your mind. You watched as he pulled his helmet on and hopped onto his bike. He looked at you and offered up a half-hearted smile before peeling out of the compound. With a heavy sigh, you did as he asked, shutting and locking the gates behind him once he had left.

Your original plan had been to head to bed, but you knew that you weren’t going to be able to fall asleep without knowing that he was back safe and sound in the clubhouse. A million different scenarios were running through your mind as you made your way back to Opie’s dorm. You tried to tune out your own brain as you changed into an old hoodie and a pair of sweatpants. You figured you would just hang out in the clubhouse and wait for Juice to get back—there wasn’t much else to do otherwise especially now that you were locked onto the compound.

Not too long after Juice had left, you got a check-in text from Opie. You didn’t mention that Juice had left you on your own. It was either one of two scenarios: it was club business and Opie knew about it, or it was personal business and Opie didn’t need to know about it. You reassured him that all was quiet.

Juice had been gone for a couple hours and you were starting to get worried. You wanted to reach out, send a text or give him a call, but you refrained. If he needed your help he knew how to reach you. You were sprawled on the couch in the clubhouse, eyes resting shut but still incredibly awake.

You heard the clubhouse door open. You slowly sat up and looked over at Juice, who was clearly trying to step quietly because he thought that you had been asleep. Embarrassment flashed across his features for a moment when he saw you looking at him attempting to tip-toe on the creaky hardwood floors. He looked so much more exhausted than when he had left.

“You okay? Was starting to get a little worried.”

He nodded, “Fine. Just some personal shit going on.”

He had never been a good liar. But you knew that it wasn’t the time to press the issue, “Alright. I’m here if you wanna talk, you know. Every now and then I even have good advice.”

He forced a smile, “Thank you.”

He disappeared back towards the dorms and left you alone in the open expanse of the bar. You sighed, leaning your head back against the arm of the couch. Running your hands down over your face, you let out a quiet groan. You got up off the couch and shut off all the lights in the main area of the bar. It was one of the only times you’d ever seen it empty, clean, and quiet. You headed back towards the dorms.

Stopping just outside Juice’s door, you took a deep breath in to pluck up some courage. You tapped your knuckles lightly on his door that was slightly ajar. You heard some shuffling around before his voice called out for you to come in.

You walked in to see him in a t-shirt and a pair of boxers. Your breath got caught in your throat, and for a moment you forgot that you were popping in to check on him. You shook your head to dispel the thoughts. He was sitting on the edge of his bed, feet planted firmly on the floor. He wouldn’t look up at you and it made your heart sink inside your chest.

“You sure you’re alright? If you want some company I—”

“I’m fine,” he cut you off, something he’d never done before, “Goodnight, Y/N. I’ll see you in the morning.”

You tried to hide how much it had stung to have him be that short with you. Your voice was soft, “Goodnight.”

You laid in bed and stared up at the ceiling. You hated that Juice being short with you had such a negative effect on you, but he’d never been that way with you. The club had been through some serious ups and downs, and even when things felt like they were crumbling, he was always kind and soft with you. It concerned you as much as anything else.

It was reaching into the small hours of the morning and you still hadn’t been able to fall asleep. You huffed, swinging your legs off the bed and standing up. You flipped the hood of your sweatshirt up and made your way out into the clubhouse, hoping that maybe a shot or two of something strong would help put you to sleep. You were fumbling around in the dark when you heard the click of a gun behind you.

“It’s me,” you knew it was Juice, so you didn’t bother to turn around.

“Jesus Christ,” he clicked the safety back on his gun and let his hands drop to his sides, “Why are you up so early?”

“Late,” you corrected, “Never fell asleep.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously,” you grabbed a bottle of whiskey and took a swig, cringing as the liquor burned down your throat.

“Whoa, whoa,” Juice walked over and took the bottle from you, “I don’t think that’s the answer to the problem.”

You looked at him, still seeing worry etched into his features, the light in his eyes just a little duller than usual, “What’s going on with you?”

He glanced over at you as he put the bottle away, “What?”

“You heard me. What happened tonight?”

“Is that why you haven’t been able to sleep?”

It felt childish to say, but you did anyway, “You’ve never snapped at me like that.”

He sighed, running his hand along his fauxhawk as he did. He forced himself to look over at you. He couldn’t lie to you but he didn’t want to tell you the truth either. There was too much on the line for both of you.

“It’s nothing that you need to get roped into,” he answered honestly.

“I’m not just Opie’s sister, you know,” you waited for him to look you in the eyes, “I’m your friend. I’m…I’m someone who cares about you. You can talk to me—I’m not just gonna go running to my fucking brother.”

“I know,” his response was immediate, “I know you won’t. It’s not that. It’s just, fuck,” he shook his head, “The whole thing is a mess.”

“C’mon,” you waved for him to walk with you back towards the dorms, “sit and talk with me.”

The two of you found yourselves sat on Juice’s bed. You were both sitting cross-legged, facing each other. Juice twisted his hands nervously in his lap as he started to tell you about everything that had been happening with him and Roosevelt and Potter. He told you about what they had said to him at the meeting that night, about the position that they were putting him in.

“I can’t go to the club with this.”

“Why not?” you knew the situation wasn’t ideal, but there was no one that the club hated more than the feds. If anything, they would be more than willing to help take them down or at the very least run them out of Charming.

“I can’t risk losing this,” he gestured around him to the dorm and clubhouse around him, “It’s the only home, the only family that I’ve got,” he paused, eyes searching your face for a moment, “And I can’t lose you either.”

A wave of warmth washed over you at the sentiment. You reached forward and placed your hands on top of his, “Juice, like it or not, you’re never going to be able to get rid of me. You’re stuck with me now.”

He chuckled, trying to make it seem like his emotions weren’t about to get the better of him, “Promise?”

“Promise,” you nodded towards his nightstand where his laptop was resting, “Grab that for me.”

He did as you asked, but couldn’t hide his confusion as he handed it over to you. You smiled at the expression on his face as you began to start typing away on his keyboard. In that moment he realized he’d never seen you use a computer—you’d never had a reason to around him. He watched in awe as your fingers flew across the keyboard.

You were lying on your stomach on his bed, laptop propped up on his pillow. Juice was lying down beside you, close enough for you to feel the heat radiating off of his body and soaking into yours. You tried not to focus on that as you continued to click through windows and move things around on his desktop.

“Do I get to ask what you’re doing?”

You chuckled, “I’m doing a little information recon,” you glanced over at him with a smile, “You’re not the only one with tech know-how around here, Juicy. I just never wanted to steal your thunder in front of the guys.”

He chuckled, shaking his head, “How kind of you. What’re you looking for, anyway?”

“Dirt,” you replied simply.

“On Potter?” when you nodded in response, he couldn’t hide the doubt that was warping his features, “You’re not going to be able to find anything on him. There’s no way his shit isn’t locked in a vault somewhere behind twenty million walls of encryptions.”

You shook your head, “Oh ye of little faith. No one is clean,” you sighed, “Especially not the fucking feds.”

Juice laughed, “Now you’re sounding like a patch.”

You chuckled, “Might as well be.”

Your typing faltered when you felt his hand slide underneath the warm fabric of your hoodie. His palm rested gently in the center of your back, and he didn’t make any comment about it. You fought to keep your composure, but the warmth seeping into your skin from his was making it difficult.

He rested his chin onto your shoulder and you felt like you were about to combust. He spoke up, his tone gentle, “Thank you.”

“Yea,” you fought to keep your tone even, “of course. You know I’ve always got your back.”

“And I’m sorry. About earlier, I mean. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that—I know you just wanted to help.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not,” he slid his hand so that his arm was wrapped around you and pulled you close to him, prying your attention away from his computer, “I was just hit with all these thoughts of losing everything that I have here. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.”

You reveled in the feelings of his arms being wrapped around you. Gently, hesitantly, you reached out and traced your fingers down the side of his face. He let his eyes flutter shut as he leaned into your touch and you could feel your heart swelling inside your chest. There was a softness to him that you hoped he would never lose.

“We’re going to figure this out,” you leaned in and pressed your forehead to his, “Do you trust me?”

He took a deep breath and nodded as he wrapped his arms tighter around you, “Yea, I do.”

“Juice?” you asked after a few moments of silence.

He pulled away from you just enough so that he could look into your eyes, “Yea?”

“Can I stay here with you tonight?”

His heart was beating fast enough that he could’ve sworn that you could hear it, “Y-yea. Of course.”

You smiled as you shut the laptop and placed it back onto his bedside table. You shimmied yourself underneath the covers and waited for him to do the same. It was going to be a long few days of trying to get as many answers put together before everyone got back, but those were problems for the morning. For now, you focused on the feeling of Juice’s heartbeat against your cheek as you snuggled into him. His hand caressed your back and you let out a quiet hum of contentment. You felt him smile against your forehead before he placed a gentle kiss there.

“Goodnight,” he said softly.

You finally felt your exhaustion starting to kick in, “Goodnight.”

[deniigi]

my supervisor fucked me over with all my other coworkers present. can I request a one shot from you to cheer me up featuring Sammy?

Did I give y’all the fic about the hotpot?

Well if I didn’t, I’m giving it to you now.

Title: hotpot

Summary: Ganke checks the comments for the Blindspot comic daily and there’s this one asshole anon who keeps talking shit about BT.

--

The Blindspot comic went live in the fall and Ganke couldn’t stop checking the hit count every five seconds. All night there had only been ten hits.

He told himself not to be disappointed. The only person who really mattered had read and loved the comic.

Miles said that BT had even forced everyone on the team to read an abridged version of Journey to the West, and had gone as far as to make a quiz to determine everyone’s character.

Miles refused to disclose who he’d gotten.

BT had clearly rigged the game to make himself Sun Wukong and Ganke was proud of him.

That kind of enthusiasm was exactly what he’d been hoping for, anything else now was just icing on the cake.

Even though it would be cool if it wasn’t just BT reading his own comics.

That would be pretty cool, right? Like. If people online all started reading BT’s comic. That would be sort of amazing.

Kind of excellent.

Definitely worthy of an A+ and double pats on the back.

Right?

The hit counter didn’t think so. But hey, five more people had opened the page since last night. That was something, wasn’t it?

 MM: dude why not just ask Sam to tweet out the link?

 How dare you, Miles Morales.

How dare you waltz into this place with logical thought.

GL: I can’t do that. That’s like. Idk. Inflating the views.

MM: okay yeah explain to me how appealing to the person in control of the largest part of his own fandom is inflating the views

GL: I see your logic and I’m banishing it

MM: I’m messaging him

GL: DON’T

MM: too late

MM: he says ‘gimme link’

GL: asdksjsjdks

--

 @blindspot: hi I know y’all can’t get enough of me to the point of asking shockingly invasive questions and for you I say good news! Some amazing folks have gone through the trouble of making a Blindspot comic. it’s good guys check it out [link]

--

 It helped.

A lot.

It helped a lot.

--

 People, on the whole, had great things to say. The panels were screenshotted and tagged and sent all over social media and even though Miles was pretending to be chill and aloof about the whole thing, Ganke could imagine him smiling big and bright and white at his phone non-stop.

Mom and Auntie saw a few of the bits on Twitter and tittered over them in the kitchen like pigeons.

The pride rose like a wave. Ganke kept waiting for the crash.

--

 It came two days later in the form of a comment that read ‘Christ, look at all this fuss. BT is fine. I hate his brother.’

It felt like someone punching the wind out of Ganke’s lungs.

He took comfort in the handful of people who leapt in to shout down the commenter. They emphasized that if the anonymous commenter didn’t like the story or the characters, then they didn’t have to read it and they, especially, didn’t have to say anything about it.

Ganke appreciated those guys. He got the feeling that a lot of the people on there knew that the whole thing had been done but a couple of kids.

Not that Anon cared.

Anon replied to all these comments ‘No, I’m gonna keep reading, thanks. Anyways, the brother is lame. The smart part is cool, but why’s it always gotta be a guy?’

The part that haunted Ganke even after he’d shut his laptop and had gone to stick his head out the window for some big breaths of cleansing air was that Anon was kind of right.

--

 GL: should we have made Guotin’s brother a sister?

MM: no

GL: why not?

MM: cause BT’s always wanted a brother

 Oh.

Okay. Then it was fine?

 MM: yeah man ignore them. it’s chill.

GL: k thanks my ego is huge and fragile

MM: trust me I know

 Asshole. Fine, moving right along.

--

 It didn’t stop. Anon commented on every page. Every. Single. Page.

Ganke didn’t know what to do or say. On the one hand, clearly this person was dedicated and deeply engaged with the comic, on the other hand, they needed a Rude Alert button. Ganke wondered if Ned could code one for them and them only.

The latest of their fury was directed at the big reveal in the second issue—BT’s face.

Having now met Sam, BT, Blindspot, Ganke’s whole image of him had changed.

He was not conventionally attractive as far as like, K-Pop idols and famous Chinese dudes went. His eyes were puffy and narrow and his face was round everywhere but the jaw. He leaned more towards ‘cute’ than ‘sexy,’ which Ganke sort of loved about him.

He was friendly. Stressed and grumpy and feisty as hell, yeah, but first and foremost friendly.

Miles claimed that he called it his ‘number one asset in employability.’ Which was wild because hello, Blindspot.

Obviously, BT couldn’t help his face. But Miles and Ganke could help Guotin’s.

Ganke had sent Miles about fifteen different images of Chinese celebrities and had told him to do his worst. They’d reviewed the final few drafts and had picked one that was most like a young Chen Kun. His face was more oval-shaped than BT’s. His chin and lips were slimmer but more defined. He was pretty, but not so pretty as to be called ‘feminine,’ which Ganke thought was a solid compromise between ‘handsome as sin’ and ‘looks like he’s got a quirky sense of humor.’

Anon hated him.

Anon thought that he looked like an idol, and they were not here for it.

They told ‘the artist’ to give him a mole or something, anything to make him look ‘less pristine. God, I can smell him from here and he smells like Dior and staph habitat.’

Ganke had to look up what a staph infection was. He regretted it. He asked Miles if they should censor Anon.

Miles said ‘mmmmm, idk it’s not like they aren’t saying anything that isn’t true.’

Ganke resented that. Clearly this was defamation of BT. This person hated him and was taking their feeling out on the comic.

 MM: I mean yeah but it’s not like they’re talking about the comic, man. They’re talking about the style and like, thinking about it, a mole or smth to help you tell him apart from other folks would kind of be helpful. Like, especially if we ever put him in a crowd, you know?

 HHHHHH.

Fine.

Anon could stay. But they were on thin ice.

--

 It was hard not to be bitter about Anon’s comments, especially when they arrived daily, as though Anon knew exactly what they were doing and which page they’d left off at. They couldn’t possibly be reading the comic one page at a time, this was intentional.

Ganke’s jaw hurt from all the tooth grinding he’d endured as of late.

This latest one read ‘yo, has BT ever mentioned fighting with a sword? I don’t recall him mentioning. Someone should take that thing away from him before someone loses an eye—or maybe even two.’

That felt like a pointed jibe.

That turned the churning irritation in Ganke’s gut into something much, much colder.

Did Anon know about BT’s black and blue eyes? How could they know? Was it a coincidence? It seemed to be more than a coincidence.

The pile of critiques was growing bigger and bigger, and now that Ganke thought about it, they all seemed to take issue with things that didn’t match the real Blindspot’s personality.

It was as if they knew him.

 GL: miles did you read the new comment from AnonTheAsshole?

MM: lol yeah

GL: tell me if I’m talking out my ass or whatever but like

GL: you don’t think they could be Muse, could they?

 Silence.

 MM: oh no

 Yeah. Fuck.

 MM: chances are low.

GL: they know so much tho??

MM: might be stalker? Maybe someone who’s over-invested in BT’s social media pages?

GL: maybe.

MM: hold on let me ask Spidey to screen it

GL: does he know Muse?

MM: no, but he’s paranoid and he’ll get Wade to be paranoid with him, and then they can decide whether its worth giving to DD for verification. He knows Muse.

 Ganke’s head was spinning. His fingers shook with guilt and the thought of Muse’s pale body hunched over a secret, cracked cell phone in a high security prison who knew where.

In Ganke’s head, he smiled wider and wider, until the skin on his cheeks cracked. He dug out scraps of paper and redrew Blindspot—Sam—with gaping holes for eyes and a screaming mouth and he drew dismembered corpses in black lakes and he laughed.

He just kept laughing.

 MM: hey ganke

MM: it’s going to be okay. It’s just a comic. I’m sure AnonTheAsshole is a stalker. They’re not threatening anyone.

MM: Sam can deal with a stalker. And we can too, okay?

 There was a reason that Miles was a hero. Ganke wiped at his eyes and swallowed.

 GL: okay. Thanks for doing that.

MM: 👍🏾

--

 It took a few hours because Spidey and Deadpool had lives outside of being Spidey and Deadpool, but not so long that Ganke ran out of nails to chew.

Miles messaged him back and said that Spidey had read through everything and ‘escalated it.’ This meant that whatever he’d seen had caused him enough concern to take it to DP.

Miles said that he’d get back to Ganke with DP’s verdict as soon as he had it. In the meantime, he’d run the comments by the other Spideypeople and they thought that it most likely wasn’t malevolent but was maybe something to keep an eye on in the meantime. He tacked onto all, somewhat stiltedly, that he had a weird feeling all of the sudden. The pink Spidey’s tone had changed. She’d shut down and gone cagey, which allegedly wasn’t like her at all. Then she’d told the taller guy to DM her and they’d vanished from the chat. Miles wasn’t sure what was going on there or if maybe they knew something about stuff going on that he didn’t, but he wasn’t super comfortable with it.

 GL: crossing my fingers its nothing?

MM: same man, same.

--

 DP escalated it.

Ganke couldn’t stay still in his room. There was no comfortable place to sit or stand or lay. There was nothing to do that would make him stop thinking about everything.

 MM: It’s gonna be fine, man, DD always knows what to do.

 Miles kept saying that for every step of the way, and yet here they were. Double escalated. Ganke wasn’t so sure he even knew what was happening anymore.

That was scary. Miles was supposed to be part of the in-crowd.

 MM: Wade doesn’t think it’s anything that can’t be nipped in the bud.

 That was easy for a contract assassin to say, wasn’t it?

 MM: he says that you and I are fine. Doesn’t see any links there. Waiting on DD for confirmation of tone.

 Hurry up, Daredevil. Your apprentice’s life might be about to take a nosedive into a heap of trash.

--

 Two hours. One text.

 MM: >:/

 Ganke couldn’t contain the bubble of laughter.

 GL: good news?

MM: [image]

 He opened it.

 SC: HANNAH YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE. STOP BEING A BITCH ON MAIN

HC: You can’t tell me what to do

SC: I CAN

HC: Mom he’s being MEAN

SC: Mom she’s scaring children online

HC: I scare children everywhere I go why are these ones special???

SC: Because I said so

HC: that doesn’t fucking work Samuel you’re not her

SC: I am your older brother

SC: your ELDEST brother

HC: YOU AINT SHIT

SC: THEY DON’T COUNT

SC: HALFSIES COUNT

 What.

 MM: so.

MM: she’s not Muse.

MM: Red’s laughing his ass off at all of us for taking this to a level three

GL: wait I don’t understand

MM: Hannah is Sam’s little sister. She’s found a new hobby in our website.

 Blindspot’s little sister was reading the comic??? Holy shit.

 GL: she hates him?

MM: no I’ve been informed that they would literally commit murder for each other but this is how they express love.

 No way. Siblings were wild.

 GL: so we’re good?

MM: [image]

  SC: apologize 🔪

HC: eat my ass

SC: apologize or else

HC: or else what? You gonna come in here and sit on me? Huh? Huh????

SC: I know your email password. All 3 you cycle through. What was his name? Uuuuuuuuuh Jing?

HC: you fucking bastard

SC: Hi Jing, it’s me, Hannah. I’ve been in mad crush with you since sophomore year. Please notice me senpai 😖

HC: Die

SC: kill me

HC: I will.

 The giggles that came this time were a mix of relief and genuine intrigue. This lady read the comic every day. She took the time to scroll through pictures of her brother being an absolute lunatic and fighting with a huge monkey. Then she hopped into that comment box and took him—not Miles, not Ganke, specifically Blindspot--down a peg.

She must miss him a lot. Ganke wondered if this was her way of keeping him in her thoughts.

 MM: I don’t think we’re getting a sorry, man. DD says Sam’s been at this all morning and has been tricked into apologizing himself twice

GL: so you’re saying that she’s an evil genius

MM: idk but she’s def Sam’s main nemesis. I always thought that older siblings got like, rights or something over younger ones, but idk anymore. Angel says this is normal.

GL: do you think she misses him?

 Miles took a long time to respond.

 MM: yeah

 Yeah, Ganke thought so, too.

 GL: should we change Guo tin’s brother’s name to ‘hamish?’

MM: ASDLDSDSFKdsjf

MM: one moment.

MM: sam says yes. Hannah says that she thinks our comic is shit and we need to draw everything uglier

GL: she’s kind of funny

MM: 👀perhaps she would like to be a consultant?

GL: 👀👀👀👀

MM: brb asking

MM: sam says no. Hannah says she’s got better things to do than proofread comics on the internet. She’s also not sorry. She wants that to be clear. DD says that the conversation has moved from English to Chinese and to maybe duck and cover for now. He says all is good tho. Thanks for checking in.

MM: Muse doesn’t use punctuation and talks in riddles, so if we get any of that, we’re supposed to send it to DP right away.

 Oh, nice. That was a relief.

 MM: oh

MM: sam wants to put us in a chat. Can I give him your number?

 Uh, only if he wanted Ganke to hyperventilate.

 GL: sure

 --

  [GL has been added to a Secure Chat]

 It was a page of characters and emojis that were somehow more menacing than Ganke had ever seen them before. Miles popped a little waving hand into the fray, as though testing the waters, but the characters just carried on scrawling around it.

Ganke wasn’t quite sure what to do.

 GL: hi? Are y’all okay?

��There was finally a pause. Then a few shorter lines of characters. And then finally, Blindspot switched from Chinese to English.

 SC: yes we’re FINE. We’re GREAT. Aren’t we, sibling from hell?

HC: who’re you? Why are you in our family chat? This is a family only zone, can’t you read?

SC: God Hannah he’s Korean don’t be a dick

HC: I can’t not be I learned it from you

SC: fair but pretend in the face of company

HC: okay fine. Hello losers.

MM: adksadfadsdfldfsldf

MM: hi

GL: hi?

SC: go on

HC: UGH

HC: fine

HC: I didn’t mean to shit talk your creation. Only my brother.

SC: also a sin, we’ll get to that later

HC: no one cares about you Samuel, stop spreading lies

SC: you first. We both know this is no lie, my white dad cares about me a whole lot

HC: well we can’t all have white dads now can we

SC: don’t be jealous

MM: lol you really call Matt your white dad??

HC: who is this person and how do they know our mutual parent’s name?

SC: this is not a mutual parent situation how many times have we been through this. He’s mine. Get your own.

MM: hi! 👋🏾I’m Bitsy! Spidey no. 4

GL: I’m his friend. He draws the comic. I write it.

HC: oh. nerd children x2

HC: anyways yeah Matt is our dad

SC: ffs

MM: he’s sort of dadly ig.

HC: ?? oho

SC: mind your face. Think about your face. Think about how much you like your face.

HC: little spider, did you not hear?

SC: kay everyone out. We’re done here

MM: hear what?

HC: lol Sammy you didn’t tell them about how Matthew Mcconaughey adopted you in all ways but paperwork?

 Ganke held his phone away from his face as far as it would go.

 MM: …wait are you for real?

SC: no. okay out.

HC: awwww Sammy so shy now. What are you embarrassed about? It’s cute.

SC: Hannah literally shut up I’m not playing

HC: damn okay sorry

MM: can I be honest?

SC: no

MM: I’m going to be anyways: I think we all sorta knew.

SC: …

HC: right?

SC: what does that even mean?

MM: idk, it just felt right, you know? You two are always fussing at each other and red lost his shit that time you got shot. He doesn’t treat you the way he treats the rest of us and we’re his teammates. He doesn’t even treat spidey like he treats you. So like, yeah. It fits.

MM: I’m really happy for you guys.

MM: is there a reason it’s a secret?

 Ganke eased himself back down onto the mattress. This was real. This was like, actual, real information. Something that he and like, four other people in the world now knew.

He kind of wanted to forget it. It didn’t feel right to know.

 SC: I dunno.

HC: if sam has an honest emotion towards anything he has to calculate its weight so he can make space for it in his collection of satellites.

MM: wh

SC: you’re so not funny.

HC: it’s called emotional repression, darling. It’s all the rage in this family.  

MM: oh

MM: so that’s why you and Red get on so well

SC: HHHHHHH

HC: HA

SC: okay but listen his is different, I’ve only seen him cry at his wedding. I cry at least 4 times a week. Obviously under the bed, but that can’t be emotional repression. That’s expression. That’s clearly expression

HC: I can make the old man cry watch me

SC: please don’t I’ll die

MM: awwwww

SC: shut up it doesn’t even matter.

MM: AWWWWWW

SC: LEAVE ALREADY

MM: no I like it here. I want to hear you talk about how much you love your white dad

SC: I don’t. He loves me. I’m fine with this because it results in food, shelter, and continued employment.

HC: uh huh

SC: I’m using him

HC: yeah because you’re like the most manipulative person I know.

SC: thank you

HC: /sarcasm

SC: I know I ignored it.

MM: so wait why do you actually pretend like you hate him tho?

SC: wh

SC: what the fuck am I supposed to do? Just go on up for a cuddle? Have you met Matt? The second someone starts crying, he finds trash to take out to the bins. Hell no. Life is easier for everyone if I stab him with a stick and he kicks my ass in training. It’s fine.

HC: Sam is learning how to be a Manly Man. This is step one.

SC: I’m plenty manly

HC: you’re what mom imagined as manly

SC: which is perfect. That’s all I need.

HC: mama’s boy

SC: must suck to suck, no one’s kid.

 Wow. Ganke had never been more glad that he didn’t have a sister.

 GL: That’s kind of cool, though.

GL: that you and DD are close like that I mean.

GL: Its different from all the other mentor/mentee superheroes we see who like, sort of hate each other.

SC: wh

SC: OH. you mean Peter and Kate. Peter doesn’t actually hate Stark, fyi. And Kate calls Hawkeye the Old bi-weekly to make sure he’s still breathing. It’s actually pretty normal.

MM: he doesn’t mean like that Sam. I mean, like those guys don’t associate with their Olds now that they’re grown up and stuff, but you and DD stick together. It’s like you’re family.

MM: and that’s super cool. Idk if Spidey would ever consider me family. I don’t think he wants that for us.

SC: I?

SC: oh shit

HC: CLARITY ON THIS FINE DAY. What was your name again, tiny spider?

MM: miles

HC: PRAISE BE TO MILES

HC: AN EMOTION WAS HAD

SC: get fucked

HC: An epiphany was obtained!

SC: would you shut up

HC: Something has finally permeated that non-porous, two-inch thick skull of my esteemed eldest brother

SC: I’m your only brother

HC: you’re not

SC: they don’t fucking count

HC: now will you FINALLY invite our mutual dad to hotpot?

SC: Hannah he doesn’t want to come to hot pot we’ve talked about this. it’s too spicy for him.

HC: I’ll make it 1/3 less spicy

SC: that’s still too spicy

HC: I’ll make it 2/5 less spicy

SC: 3/5

HC: listen

HC: I have all this fucking equipment that SOMEONE left here callously

MM: what’s hotpot?

SC: 👀

HC: 👀

GL: 👀

SC: well fuck

HC: EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

GL: have we never taken you with us for hotpot???

MM: no?? is this the sticks?

HC: can be. Where do you live?

SC: Hannah no

HC: Hannah yes. We’ll make one here. You’ll make one there.

SC: do you know how much shit I’ll have to buy? Where are we gonna put it?

HC: this wouldn’t be a problem if you’d taken your goddamn inheritance with you to SF

SC: HHHHHH

MM: you guys are actually being serious?

HC: I am. I am here all on my lonesome. Abandoned by my only kin. I require enrichment.

SC: try doing your fucking homework

HC: did anyone hear something?

MM: lololololol I like you

HC: 😊

SC: wh

SC: oh no. No no no.

SC: you two don’t get to be friends

HC: come here bb pspspspspspsps

MM: I’m here

HC: got ‘im. Let’s have hotpot. Sammy send me resippy. We’ll do it together over video so I don’t fuck it up.

SC: I’ve got to go. This has been traumatizing.

HC: byeeeeeeeeeeee

HC: is he gone? Hell yeah, he’s gone.

HC: hey thanks for making that comic thing. It’s hella rad. He loves it. Mom used to call him Monkey when he was little.

GL: omg aw

HC: ikr? P cute. He misses her a lot so I think it brought back good memories. Anyways, I’m actually going to make hotpot. Come over and have some with me, it’s more fun with more people.

MM: you’re not joking

HC: nope, it’s been ages since your whole team has gotten together, right? Ask them to do it. I’m a shit cook, but Sam’ll show us how not to screw it up. And he’s playin’, he’s totally down to hang out with us. We never had more than three people. It’ll be new. Exciting. Enriching even.

MM: are you secretly a nice person, Hannah?

HC: the fuck do you mean ‘secret’??? I’m a delight.

MM: Okay I’ll ask the team and my mom

MM: ganke?

HC: 👀

 That—

Sounded kind of nice?

 GL: I’ll ask my mom.

HC: nice. You can tell them that it’s a friends dinner or whatever. Idc. I promise I’m not going to kidnap and murder you. I’ve got like, class and work and shit. I don’t have time for that.

MM: 👍🏾

GL: 👍🏼

HC: great here I’ll message you my number. This is legit our sibs chat so Sam’ll freak if you’re still here when he gets back.

MM: thank you! And sorry for thinking you were muse!!

GL: yeah that too

HC: lol np ttyl                                    

 That…had really just happened, hadn’t it?

Ganke needed to sit down even though he was already sitting down.

 GL: they’re so nice???

MM: ikr?

GL: are you actually going to ask your mom?

MM: Im gonna ask BT if its cool first. Then yeah. Why not? Our team really hasn’t gotten together in a minute. Everyone’s been super busy. It would be a nice change of pace, and if everyone brings smth then Hannah doesn’t have to pay for anything.

MM: ah, Sam says it’s okay. He says sorry his sister is weird and that he’ll make sure she doesn’t poison us.

GL: I kind of love her

MM: same

MM: okay will check in with the others. Talk to you later.

GL: yeah see you later

 Damn, at this rate, Ganke’s family was going to triple in size, and all thanks to a comic.

Before he left for downstairs, he made a note to make Guo tin’s brother snarkier.

[4ragon]

oh, can you do a character analysis for a dgs character of your choosing?

Whoo boy. Let’s see if I can...

I love the DGS duology a lot, even though I’ve only been through it once a few years ago. I think it’s a mark of a fantastic game that I can still have a fond place in my heart for all these characters. But if I have to talk about one character for an unreasonable amount of time, I think there’s one character that stands out in particular.

That’s right everyone. It’s your favorite detective and mine! Herlo

It’s

It’s your favorite detective and mine H

HErl

It’s your 

It’s Herlo

Fuck I can’t I can’t do it I was going to make a joke about the name translation but typing it out hurts me so much why that??? Why make it that??? Was there no better name they could change it to???

Anyway. Sherlock Holmes.

I’m not a particular fan of the Sherlock Holmes mythos. I’ve never read an original story, nor watched any of the old movies. I’ve seen the RDJ movies, and watched I think 2.5 seasons of Sherlock, which, you know, were fine, I had fun with them in college. I love murder mysteries a lot, particularly murder mystery games, but I’d never really found myself interested in Sherlock Holmes as a character.

This Sherlock Holmes though? God. I fell in love instantly.

He’s basically a supergenius hyperactive five-year-old in the body of an adult man. He’s a single father, which, again, I do have a soft spot for, and he’s also just. Ridiculous? Silly? Eccentric but not in an asshole way? He’s not nice, per se, even though he was perfectly willing to let two strangers live in his attic so long as they were willing to put up with him playing a broken violin and crying about how he’s no longer talented or dying his hair wild colors. He’s certainly not polite but there’s still this goodness to him under that wacky demeanor.

He’s unpredictable in the best way possible. You talk to him in one room, he bids you a fond farewell, you go upstairs, and he’s climbed through an upper floor window and then got distracted and read a book, and you’re like “What the fuck are you doing” and he’s like “Oh hello my friends have you read this book before? Also here’s twenty new things to talk about.” Like??? He’s so fun to interact with, because he’s this incredibly smart weirdo who perpetually has no clue what is going on around him and also already knows the answer and also kind of doesn’t. You’ll talk to him and he’ll have both solved the mystery and somehow attributed it to flying snakes trained in the art of mortal combat and also everything you know about the case is wrong and he can prove it and also he’s hanging upside down from a coat hook on the wall.

And minor spoiler in this paragraph, if you’re avoiding that, but the new mechanic? The Joint Reasoning (or the Dance of Deduction if you watched that AA Orchestra Spectacular or whatever please just TRANSLATE DGS PLEASE I’M BEGGING YOU) is just such a fun mechanic to work with. It embodies all the parts of Sherlock that I find so fun. The way that his brain is clearly working a million miles an hour to the point that he can’t even fully make sense of things, and you just have to steer him in the right direction (which, like, same). He’s able to make these inventions that logically make no fucking sense, time period or otherwise, and yet when you ignore him too long he curls up in a corner and gets very sad until someone comforts him. It’s so good!

(Also and I won’t spoil it since DGS2 is harder to experience but there’s a Joint Reasoning thing with Sherlock and another character and it’s so fucking great so y’all have that to look forward to, anyway)

He’s absolutely one of the best parts of DGS. He steals the show any time he’s on screen. He’s funny and fun. He drives the plot along in a lot of ways. He’s just bursting with personality.

Also, I love everything about his relationship with Iris. His little roommate who takes care of him as much as he takes care of her. He’s not the best dad but he clearly loves this kiddo so much and she loves him. I mean, he clearly is not equipped to be caring for a child, but he does his best and you can really feel it throughout. There are especially a lot of parts in DGS2 that I loved a ton, but again. No spoilers.

Anyway, if you’re reading this, and you haven’t played/watched DGS, please find a way to do it. It’s so fun. Hopefully they’ll give us a version to play in the next year. I just. It’s so good.

[grizztheexplorer]

Ah. There’s a whole carnivores vs herbivores discussion going on with Beastars fans and lmao it really misses the point to want to put the spotlight on one as the bad one. Like…. It misses the point of the whole manga😭 a lot of people have only watched the anime though, so I see maybe why. The anime has only covered essentially the first major arc, nothing else. Only the school life, which is very different from what we see later on in the real world amongst citizens.

I think people also need to take in mind Beastars is a metaphor that went one way and then the other, so ir doesn’t work as a clear metaphor for any minority group, whether thats gender, sexuality, or race. So saying one group is like a real group in the world doesn’t work because both carnivores and herbivores can be nasty people. And we haven’t even covered mixed kids on the anime ajdjjdjdjdj. The metaphors work if you cover a specific situation, but not as the whole group. Idk if that was done on purpose or if the writer missed the mark, but it is done that way. Both groups have really nasty characters with really nasty believes. Legosi’s whole family is a great example of what the world did with carnivores (like his mom, rip that woman).

Riz is also a really complex character, and that is seen also beyond his arc. But he is also problematic lmao idk why people are mad others dislike him and find him problematic. He is. Which is why he is a good character, he is complex, not a one dimensional bad guy. But nonetheless still problematic, y’all can’t just ignore that. And you can’t force people to like him either. What he did was super fucked up, and it really doesn’t represent how carnivores in general behave either. I see both arguments being like “but he had to go thro this poor carnivores” and that us wrong. Same with “and he did this carnivores behave like that” which is also wrong😭 Riz was a very specific character with specific beliefs made up by his specific circumstances. Him as an argument to go with or against carnivores really doesn’t work. Then again, him and other teens that are also trying to understand the world around them are all we know from the anime. We haven’t seen adults and the way the systems in society are fully set up yet. So i get it, is just annoying to see ajdjdjd.

Beastars fandom has always been murky but my god people who only have extended knowledge of the anime are really at each other’s throats and no one is seeing the full picture, or they are trying to stick with metaphors of the real world that don’t really work. Idk if that makes the writing bad bc they failed with metaphors, or good because that was never quite their intention to begin with. Up to interpretation i guess.

Also many parts of what ended up being my fave from the manga were either cut or haven’t bern animated yet, so im a lil bored with the anime sjdjdjd but i’ll give it my views on Netflix if only bc I really want to see that last arc animated and see my lizard grandpa’s story shown. And Haru’s family meet Legosi. And to see Louis’ weird leg connection with Legosi shown too. Lots of cute moments I wanna see animated so they better get more seasons😭

Prob won’t go through the tag bc i feel like a lot of people are arguing for one side or the other and missing the point by miles (which when the manga was coming up and the anime was on hiatus I didn’t see as much). So i’m just gonna stick with Gosha content bc he owns my heart and continue with my day knowing things work out for all the characters I care for anyways shdjdjjdjd

[starfirette]

Chapter Five: Clearing Trost Part II

Alstroemeria, Chapter Five:  It seems impossible, but you can’t argue with what you’re seeing. You work with the others to defend Eren.

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tags: @kuxredere | @luvelyxp | @fan-g0rl | @levisbrat25 | @a-dream-is-reality | @89staytinyzen21 | @cqptainlcvi | @the-average-mastermind | @carlyandthechocolatefactorsugar

a/n: LEVI IS HEEEREEEE. Some more minor Reiner x Reader interactions. but more importantly, LEVI  

Armin’s plan is practically flawless. 

That being said, Jean’s point on the guns is too resonate to ignore. 

Seven titans, roughly four-to-five meters, had taken over the entire supply room. Armin’s plan devised to send down an armed group of cadets, on the lift, who would then capture the titans’ attention. As soon as the titan took the bait, the group fires in all four directions to effectively blind each titan. From there, seven cadets would have to drop down from the ceiling beams to take each titan out. 

Armin seemed to think it could work with the amount of ammunition you’d all found. He also ensured you all that if the plan got screwed up, you’d all likely die. 

You held your face in your hand, massaging from the bridge of your nose to the space between your eyes. The seven most “gifted” (as Armin put it) would have to take on the role of taking down each titan. 

The others seemed to glance at you, half expecting you to take on the role of one of the seven. With your injury, you doubted that you could do your best. Considering it would be putting everyone’s life on the line, you stepped down and passed the roll onto Sasha Brauss. 

She sent you an apologetic look, which you tried your very best to ignore. You didn’t like that she tried to sympathize with you--then again, you don’t like a lot of things.

“It’s a brilliant plan, Arlert,” you commend him, nudging his knees with the toe of your boot. 

“And when it comes down to it, the risk is the same for everyone,” Annie added. “No one can get out of this.” 

“I mean,” Armin stammered, “I’m willing to here other plans. I’m not going to force anyone to do it.”

Marco sniffed, rubbing his nose with the inside of his wrist as he pipped up. “You know, it’s a good plan. Especially considering it’s our only option. If we all try then we can pull it off.” 

The enthusiasm made your stomach lurch. You felt like an outsider watching everyone else through thick, frosty glass. You didn’t feel outrageously confident that the world wouldn’t end tonight. You don’t even know where you’re going to be sleeping tonight. You could be dead tonight. 

The lift creaked as it came to a stop, the gate falling down to the floor with a slam. It was ready, and it was time. You begrudgingly grabbed a rifle and a handful of the bullets from the crates. 

Your thumbs ached as you loaded the rounds in, one by one.

You tucked the rifle under your arms, looking around to find Reiner standing nearby. 

“We’re getting ready to head out,” he explained as you stared with a silent question in your eyes. 

“How are y’all going to do it without your gear?” you asked. You held your hand out quickly to stop him from answering. “Just joking,” you hurried. “I don’t want to know. I should just focus on my job.” It would stress you out more if you knew exactly how Reiner and the others were going to pull the little stunt off without their gear. 

Reiner’s eyes softened as he looked down at you clearly contemplating your existence within the regiment. 

“Don’t take it so personally,” he says kindly, but firmly. “You’re injured. You need to take a rest, not just for our sake but also for yours.” 

You pout. “It’s not really a confidence booster when you can’t even take out a four meter bastard because of some goddamn cramps,” you spat as you angrily hit the cemented floor with the toe of your boot. 

“Chill out,” Reiner huffed. He rested a hand atop of your shoulder, “You’re still good at what you do. It’s not like this is an exam, or anything.” 

“Not an exam,” you agreed, just as you stomped over to the lift. “Just regular life or death.” 

“Yeah,” Reiner laughed in agreement. “Regular life or death.” 

Reiner had been elected as one of the seven who would be taking care of the titans once they were blinded. He followed behind Annie and Bertholdt, who you swore was too smug over the fact you were being left behind. 

But you tried to tell yourself this wasn’t an exam; it wasn’t at all an evaluation of your character. 

You were on the very front lines, right in the center of the north facing gunmen where you would be face to face with the filthy little shits. The ride down on the life was too, too quiet for your liking. 

You looked back and forth to those who were on your sides. They were all practically green with nausea. 

You rolled your eyes. Part of you almost chastised them all for being such worry warts, but you knew that was merely your own way of coping with the fact that you weren’t good enough to be one of the seven strikers. 

“Watch it,” you suddenly snapped. The cadet on your right stumbled and hit you in the side with their boney elbow. “You’re making me all sweaty,” you added as you lifted your nose in the air. 

But you did not realize that you were sweating all on your own. Your conscious weighed heavy with anxiety that cloaked itself as frustration. 

You could feel the lift racketing under your feet as if lowered through a plain column of dark walls. You gulped, the knot in your throat refusing to disappear as you imagined what would be awaiting you all in the main room of surprises. 

The lift cranked to a slow stop. You could see the seven titans, which seemed to glow under the torchlights that still burned on the walls. When they walked, the floor groaned, and you feared their big heads would hit the structural beams that supported the building. 

They all noticed to arrival of the lift, especially when it clicked into place and the gears stopped moving. 

You shot your gun outward, the hilt of it hitting your shoulder as you stood tall and with a raised chin. The others around you did the same, their muskets clicking into place. 

You shivered as Marco led the others with calm words, keeping everyone at ease. 

When the first titan whirled over to look at you all, you nearly pissed yourself. It’s disturbed face was twisted into a smile as it took one step closer. 

You couldn’t fire yet; no one could. It would have been a waste of ammunition. “Fire only when they’re within range,” Marco reminded the others, as if on cue, like he could read your thoughts. 

Hell. Maybe this titan can read your thoughts. He is looking at you like he can. He’s looking at you with beady, bright eyes, like he’s fucking excited to see what you’ll taste like, or how you’ll sound when you scream at the sight of your friends being devoured, torn apart, and thrown, like rag dolls. 

It’s then that you noticed just how heavy you’re breathing. You’re chest heaves like you’ve been running for miles, and a wheeze is coming from the bottom of your lungs like a broken accordion. 

“Now, Marco,” you said. You tried to sound firm. Brave. 

But instead, you sounded helpless. 

“Wait,” he insisted. He sounded only mildly worried, as if this were a regular day for him. 

“Marco,” you plead. The titans have gathered all around, now, and they’re literal inches away from you. 

Your heart fell into your stomach as the titan waddled closer. His smile burned into your eyes, and you knew, then, that you’d see that thing’s face every night when you closed your eyes. 

His breath reeked like nothing you’d ever smelt before. It was like a million deaths in that thing’s mouth. 

Bile rose in your throat, bitter on your tongue as your finger slid across the golden trigger. 

The titan took a step closer and the soft squish his eye made as he touched the barrel of your gun pushed you over the edge. 

“MARCO,” you shriek. Your voice sounded foreign in your own ears. It was dripping with panic. 

The guns blasted, shooting off like thunder cracking all around you. It was such a chaotic noise. You couldn’t describe the aura of it all, with the thundering booms of each fire that stayed in time with the muzzle flares. 

Each titan went down with a boom. One, two, three, you counted. 

You felt instant relief flood your body like a sweet drug. 

The relief was dried up when you realized that Sasha missed. 

Sasha missed. Sasha, who wouldn’t have even been up there if it weren’t for your injury. You wouldn’t have missed. You would have made it. 

For a split second, you could see all the death before your very eyes. Your entire squad, gone. The plan, failed. 

The titan stumbled to his knees as he reached for Sasha, who shrieked and tried to run. 

You had been so caught up in your inner grief that you didn’t even realize-Connie missed his titan, too. 

While the room got all shrouded with steam from the killed titans, you watched as Annie and Mikasa came to the rescue. Just in time. 

You were helpless from your spot on the lift. You wouldn’t have been able to do a goddamn thing if Sasha were to have gotten picked up and swallowed like a pill. Instead of worrying, or even thinking about what to do next, you were feeling jealous and bitter. You were feeling competitive. 

You couldn’t revel with the others as they cried out in joy. They all moved to fill up their tanks.

You moved around like a puppet. One half of your body felt completely numb as you filled your tanks. 

Reiner noticed. He tried to encourage you. He tried his very best. 

And still, you felt like a failure. When had you turned into someone who didn’t care about the wellbeing of others? You felt dirty. 

You’d have to face that dirty part of yourself some other time. Your pity party is cut short as the others gather together in preparation to once again venture outside.

The sun shone on your face as you stepped out of the main doors. It was a slap in the face of reality. The bad weather had come and gone; the day’s breeze was gentle, and the sunshine warm on your skin. And yet, looking around, the entire district was in utter ruin. The world would continue on. The world doesn’t care about triviality. To Nature, titans and a selfish solider girl were on and the same: nothing. 

You went to speed towards the rendezvous point. 

Reiner managed to stop you by taking hold of your blood stained elbow. “You alright?” he asked. 

“It’s not my blood,” you assured him. 

“That’s not what I mean.” His eyes narrowed, as through he were trying to see straight through you.

You stared up at the blond for a few moments before abruptly breaking the stare. “I’m fine,” you insisted. “But I appreciate you looking out for me.” 

“Well, what else are friends for?” he said with a crooked grin.

You couldn’t think of anything to say. His smile was dazzling. It was bright, genuine, and filled with honest hope. 

You just didn’t realize what he was hoping for. 

You fled to the rooftops. You were completely prepared to make a quick flight back to the wall; but it was the abnormal titan, the one who’s eyes glowed powerfully, that distracted you from making your full getaway. He was weak, you realized. He was tired. Like you. 

He was slumped up against the ruins of a building, and around him were the greedy, chubby figures of titans that were feasting on his flesh. 

Cannibalism. 

You hadn’t known that titans could exhibit such a trait like cannibalism. 

“It’s a little bit...strange. Isn’t it?” you murmured. You didn’t have to look behind you to know Reiner was there, like your constant shadow. 

“We should help it,” Reiner suddenly suggested. 

You whirled around. As you argued, Jean did as well. Both of your voices screeched at the very same time. 

“We’ve finally gotten a chance to get out of this nightmare,” Jean was saying. “And now you want to stay?” 

“The titan’s no good to us dead,” Reiner said, sounding completely calm. “I think we could genuinely learn something from it.” 

“He might be right,” Mikasa admitted as she shifted into the conversation. “I, myself, am hoping that this titan is the key to a new way.” She tugged her scarf down to exhibit her mouth, which was turned into a tight frown.

“A new way of what, exactly?” Jean asked her exasperated. 

She shot him a daggering look, her dark eyes filled with something you couldn’t label, but were afraid of all the same. “Of fighting for survival.” 

You sighed heavily. “Do you really think it can help us?” you asked. “I want to hope, too. But how can we be certain it’s not just a really strange abnormal?”

“Think about what you’ve said,” Annie cut in, her icy eyes piercing into your own. “It is an abnormal. Just how different would things be if we had an abnormal for an ally? A canon’s got nothing against a titan’s brute strength. 

“Listen to yourselves!” Jean clamored. “It’s not a shiny, new toy!”

Your eyes shot straight past Jean’s shoulder, to the sight of the abnormal who was suddenly grunting and groaning. He sounded angry. He sounded as if he were trying to speak. It was crazy, it was absolutely crazy, but he was conveying some sort of emotion as he took off to a wild charge. The titans that feasted on him earlier flew off as he went racing into another titan that had just happened to be passing by. 

The abnormal launched and tackled him. His jaw unhinged before clamping deeply into the titan’s neck. 

You gasped. 

“That’s the titan that killed Thomas,” Armin said. He didn’t sound as much regretful as he did studious. 

“What, you think the abnormal went to get revenge?” you asked. The notion was ridiculous, and you expected Armin to say as much, but he sent you a long stare that said a million words. 

“Speaking of shiny, new toys,” you muttered. The abnormal flung the titan in his mouth around like a dog would do with a bundle of rags. Even without arms, and with half of his flesh missing to reveal his ribs, he was still powerful enough to swing the titan around and make a mess. He took down others, all without even having to punch or kick. 

It was gruesome. 

It was violent. 

It was terrifying. You wondered when the abnormal would snap out of it. When would he-or IT- realize his natural enemy are the humans? The damage he would be able to do if humans were his target is unimaginable. It might be enough to destroy the entire world...

The abnormal released another cry, one that you suspected to be some sort of victory thing. 

And then it collapsed. 

“Well,” Jean was saying, sounding vaguely regretful, “it’s too late now. Let’s get a move on while we still can.” 

You would have told Jean to get shoved up a titan’s ass if you weren’t so mesmerized by the steam cloud that burst from the abnormal’s corpse. You’d seen titan’s deteriorate, but they never seemed to go out like this one is. It was releasing steam, like it was some sort of a vent, as opposed to other titans that seemed to just evaporate. 

Mikasa suddenly slipped off the roof. 

You reached out to her, shocked she would have lost her catlike balance in the first place. 

No, you realized. She didn’t slip. She was racing towards that titan’s body. Armin called after her, as stunned as the rest of you. 

“It’s nothing we’ve never seen before,” Jean said. He didn’t sound very convinced with his own reasoning. 

As the steam clouds parted, you strained your eyes to see Mikasa’s little figure perched atop the titan’s nape, cradling something in her arms as she sobbed. You’d never seen her cry before. It was a surprising display as she rocked back and forth, clutching tightly to- 

“That’s Eren Jaeger,” you exclaimed. 

Upon hearing the words, Armin rushed to join his good friends, leaving you and Jean to look at each other utterly bewildered. 

What frightened you was how un-bewildered Bertholdt was. His complexion got all grey when Armin and Mikasa struggled to get Eren’s body up to the rooftop. 

“I thought Eren was...well...I mean I’m glad he isn’t,” you quickly said, “but I-I mean-”

“Yeah,” Reiner said. “So did we.” 

Mikasa returned, her face still dripping with steady tears as she tenderly set Eren down. “He’s alive,” she said carefully. She sounded so calm. You couldn’t have guessed she was crying unless you’d been watching her. 

Armin dizzily fell against a structure of rock that was built into the roof. “This can’t be,” he gasped. 

“What’s wrong?” you instantly asked him. 

“I watched,” Armin said. His eyes were wide, filled with horror and curiosity alike. “I watched him get e-” He broke off, covering his mouth with a fist as he seemed to gag on the words. “I watched,” he recovered, “him get eaten. His arm...his leg...”

Armin started to cry, too. 

You tried not to feel too annoyed by this. 

It’s not their fault you have no friends. No way you could really relate. 

“How is this possible?” you asked when no one else did. 

“That’s not what I’m concerned about,” Jean said, sound eerily calm. “Eren did all of this.” He looked out to the destruction; the corpses that steamed and the buildings that still settled to rubble. 

That’s right; Eren did all of that. 

“Eren’s a titan,” you gasped out. 

Someone had to say it. 

Jean’s eyes looked as if they were about to simply roll out of his skull. “That’s impossible.” 

“It’s not,” you argued. “The colossal. The armored. The two most dangerous abnormal in the entire world. They behave with the same intelligence Eren was obviously displaying not even thirty minutes ago.” You waved a hand out to gesture to the entire city. “Eren’s a titan. The other bastards are human, too. And now we have to figure it the fuck out.” 

“Calm down,” Reiner eased you. He rested a heavy hand on your sholder, which you instinctively shook off. “Don’t tell me to calm down,” you seethed. “I’m RIGHT.”

“You’re having a breakdown,” Reiner said, blatant and uncaring. “You’re crying.” 

You touched your finger to your cheek,

Oh. 

So maybe you feel a little bit bad, now, for looking down at Mikasa and Armin for crying. You’re crying to. 

You do have a heart. 

“What do we do now?” Jean asked. “Who are we going to tell?” 

“The captains. The corporals. The captain-corporals,” you listed off as you wiped your eyes. You looked away, turning a shoulder to Reiner. “But I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” 

“Why not?” someone demands.

“What person in their right mind is going to be alright with Eren being a-well, a whatever the hell he is? We should just law low for a while,” you said, using your hands to gesture the laying low. 

For once, Jean looked more angry than confused. “So we’re going to keep it a secret? That’s so awesome, Y/n. We can all just have a little camp right here on the goddamn roof. We can build a fort. There’s enough of us to reproduce for a good two or three generations.” 

“We’ll get in trouble,” you snapped back. 

“Why would we get in trouble?!” Jean shouts. “Eren’s the one who’s a titan!”

Mikasa turned a stark glare onto Jean before he could take the words back. She clutched Eren’s limp body close to her chest. “You’ve never liked Eren,” she scowled. “It’s not a surprise you wouldn’t care what happens to him, even though he’s saved your life a good number of times today.” 

The group fell silent. 

You gnawed on the inside of your cheek as you looked out to the destruction of what was once Trost. 

Knowing what you know about the assholes who call themselves captains, they wouldn’t take a matter like this lightly. You folded your arms over your chest, lightly stretching out your muscles which ached. Your back felt like the hoirizon at times, sitting unnoticed until you see that one gust of sunshine that burns your retinas. 

The pain burned through your hips now, as you roughly massaged your back with your fist. 

“I guess we have to split up,” Mikasa said after some minutes of pure silence. 

You didn’t have to ask what she meant. “I will take responsibility for Eren,” she said. “I’ll speak for him while he cannot.” 

“And me,” Armin interjected. He was determined to stay with his friends. 

“Mikasa” you said carefully. You looked at Mikasa with an eyebrow raised. “We should move.” 

Armin and Mikasa looked to one another; they were so close they could communicate with simple glances and stares. 

The two hoisted each of Eren’s arms over their shoulders, able to carry him like a puppet as they prepared to move. 

You didn’t speak much as you followed the group towards the wall. Eren remained unconscious the entire trip, even though he was soaring high in the sky. The  general plan is that Armin and Mikasa could convince the commanders of what had happened, and that Eren isn’t a threat. Even before that, they’ve got to convince the commanders that their tall tale is true. 

You know what will happen. They didn’t even want to help a group of stranded cadets. They’ll turn on Eren before Mikasa could even blink. 

Not even she can protect Eren from an entire regiment. 

You’d hoped that you would have been able to return to the wall with pride, and explain to Captain Brezenska that you’d succeeded in saving your friends. Maybe you were hoping you could have gotten full credit for that. But rather, it’s Eren who will be getting the attention. 

You’re not jealous. 

At the retreat center, there were soldiers bustling around in an undirected frenzy; people panicked, but they didn’t know exactly what they were supposed to panic for. 

You were lined up with Jean, Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie, all of you remaining silent as Armin dutifully explained the entire situation. Mikasa sat with Eren strewn on her lap. 

You listened, and realized that Armin has such a good way with words. You would have believed him if he told you the sky was yellow and cats could fly. 

But his talent was hardly a gift; not  now, at least. It took a little bit of blinking and opening, then closing their gaping mouths for the commanders to realize what they ought to do next. They seemed just as shocked as everyone else. Obviously there’s not protocol for when a human turns into a titan. 

Despite Captain Brezenska’s presence, there was nothing she could when a tall, hawk~like captain with a nose twice as big as it should have been, stared all five of you down. His thin nose had elliptic nostrils that sagged practically to his moustache. 

“You are all to receive immediate medical attention and rest. There will be no talking about this, to anyone. There will be sever punishment if this rumor gets out. We will know who leaked it.” 

You meekly nodded, saluted, and agreed. There wasn’t much else you could do. You were dismissed with Reiner, Jean, and Annie-and how could you forget Bertholdt? As you five had retreated farther away from the group that studied Eren, you could see that a practical pond of sweat was forming on Bertholdt’s brow. 

At the bottom of the wall, on the safe ground, where you were surrounded by your comrades, you doubled over, as if you were about to spew vomit all about, but rather, you laughed, a hysterical sort of sound that made Annie shuffle uncomfortably. 

“Y/n,” Reiner said, again in that doting kind of voice, which you couldn’t really help but dislike. 

“I’m going to get water,” you said through your teeth. “We’d better not say anything, to anyone.” 

“Duh,” Jean sneered under his breath. As tou were walking away, you heard Jean note to the others, “She’s manic. She’s lost it. She’s all covered in blood...what happened to her?” 

You would have told him to get shoved if you were in a better mood; but right now your back ached like utter hell, and your tongue was so spectacularly dry that it felt like a porous stone against the roof of your mouth. 

You took a seat somewhere in the far corner where the perfect sheet of shade had been cast. You sat on a crate, guzzling down the water from the canteen you’d been supplied. 

You could see Reiner and the others lurking around the other cadets they were closer with. Ymir and Krista were apart of that little group. You would have gone to say something, but you simply didn’t have the energy. You’re glad to see the two young women are alive, at least. 

Not only were you too exhausted to meet them, but you were certain that the moment you joined Krista, the entire story would pour out of you. Krista had that strange sense of familiarity which effected everyone. She felt like a natural member of your family, even though you’d only known her a matter of three or so years. You’d without a doubt spill the entire thing, from Fable to the way Mikasa trembled with Eren’s body in her arms. 

You’d heard that Mikasa was Eren’s sister, though through adoption. But Mikasa held him with such a higher regard. She didn’t hold him the way you would have held little Freda. There was something more between those two. 

Perhaps just the way there’s something more than friendship between Ymir and Krista. You can see them across the lot. Ymir lingers over Krista like a guardian angel. It’s clear Ymir cares for Krista, maybe more than Krista cares for Ymir. 

But when it comes to Krista, you know to never assume. 

She’s as complex as she is beautiful. 

You watched your old group sit around, looking ashy and sullen. Ymir and Krista’s figures leaned towards Jean as he spoke. His mouth barely moved when he spoke. 

Something prickled within you. Did he tell? 

He didn’t. You guessed this because Krista set her hand on Ymir’s arm as she looked back you. She touched Ymir so gently, as if she were saying a quick goodbye. She made her way through the little maze of resting cadets, calling your name a few times to catch your attention. 

You took one more guzzle from your canteen as you leaned up against the brick wall. 

“You didn’t come to say hello,” Krista said as she approached you. She sounded a bit saddened by this. 

“I’m sorry,” you said weakly. “I’m just...tired. Glad you’re alive, though.” 

Krista frowned deeply. You regret how sarcastic you sounded just then. 

“What happened out there?” Krista asked you, her voice soft. You would have rather she expressed her anger. It is salt in the wound to know that she’d still be kind to you, even after you were consistently rude. 

You took a deep breath. Your eyes shifted back to the foreground, focusing on Reiner, Jean, and the others. “What did they tell you?” you asked her. 

“Absolutely nothing,” Krista said sorrowfully. “They’re being so ominous. What happened?” 

You groaned. You thought about telling her. “Something spectacular,” you said carefully. 

“Then why all the doom and gloom?” she fretted. 

“It’s spectacular,” you amended, “but not exactly good. It’s not for me to tell.” 

Krista frowned , her blonde brows furrowing. She looked deeply like a little rabbit as she thought long and hard. “Jean said you got a gag order,” she said. 

“Jean’s right. I can’t say.” 

Krista sighed. “I hope that everything will be alright, in the end,” she said. 

You were flabbergasted. How could she be so positive in such a time? You weren’t so much concerned with the ‘end’ as you were with where the hell you were going to sleep tonight? 

The little camp was doing its very best. Makeshift hospital stations dotted every few buildings. Carts that carried the dead and wounded rolled through the streets, past the little resting compounds where soldiers drank and cried and rested. 

“You’re too good for this world, Krista,” you told her as you rested your head back against brick. “Get used to it.” 

You immediately passed out. 

Water rushed over your toes. 

This water stretched out to the vast horizon, right where the sky took a dip and a curve down. This water was cold, yet refreshing. It washed your feet from the dirt and blood that caked your skin, all the way beneath your toenails. 

You walked forward, the crystalline waves splashing so delicately it sounded like chiming bells. Your reflection followed you clearly, flashing with the scarlet blood your bare skin was soaked in. Despite all that blood, all the pain you’d felt, you felt utterly happy here. You waded deeper into the water, the waves splashing to your breasts now. 

There was no sun in the sky. The only light came from deep within the water, which was so clear it gleamed bright white. You dove into the waves fresh water. The taste of fresh water on your tongue was sweet. You swam towards the source of light. It called out your name. It was a deep, baritone voice, but it rang gently, beckoning you. 

In the very deepest grove of the water was a large pit. It was sculpted into thick, dark rock.  

A pair of hands emerged from this pit, reaching out for someone to help them escape. 

You swam forward, closer to those slender, pale hands that waited for someone to rescue him. 

You reach out, your fingertips touching his-

“Wake up,” someone shouted. 

You got jerked up to your feet, by the collars of your button down blouse. You met Ymir’s harsh eyes. 

“What’s wrong?” you demanded. 

“You’ve been sleeping,” she said bitterly. “Time to wake up, princess. Mandatory meeting. Krista didn’t want you to miss it.” 

You were a bit stunned, and disoriented, as Ymir sauntered off to likely find Krista again. One hour of sleep seemed enough to get back to the job. Your back did ache, from the ignorant position you’d slept in slumped up against the brick wall of a building. You cringed as you walked, the pounding pain flying down your back and into your bottom as you struggled to make it to the line up. 

It was a large square of a line up, right before the wall that was being walked upon by Eren, Mikasa, and Armin’s small dots of figures. 

“That’s him,” a voice pipped beside you. Krista had joined tour side, and she pointed upwards to the bald man that was looking down at his domain. “That’s the commander, Pyxis.” 

Pyxis called for an immediate attention. Your head was still fuzzy from the nap. The dream stayed lodged in the back of your mind, replaying like a theatre play over and over. Even as the rescue operation for Trost was explained, you were only half listening. You didn’t know what your peers knew, and what they didn’t. 

Eren being a titan was announced for all to hear. Pyxis vouched for Eren, which alone was enough to convince the regiments to at least be not afraid of him. 

The recovery operation labeled Eren as a research project. Pyxis would play it off like Eren’s being a titan was a secret that all the most important higher ups knew about, including the commanders at the Survey Corps, and the royals at the Interior. 

Connie was the most shocked at the emergence of information. You just kept your mouth shut, trying not to let any reaction show on your face. 

Eren, as a titan, would be lifting a boulder and using it to block off the hole in the wall. It would be your job (the collective ‘your’) to fend him from other titans that tried to get in the way of this being done. 

Not many people believed this. You weren’t entirely positive they would appreciate you trying to vouch for the plan. Perhaps, if you did, you’d be marked as a liar, too. 

“Someone’s asking for you,” Krista said in your ear. 

You wrangled out of the crowd, being drawn to the side of a nameless solider whose hair was bright red. “You’re being requested at the expense of Captain Brezenska.” 

Shocked, you folded your arms over your chest. “May I ask why?” 

“She vouches that you are capable of being apart of the elite squad who defends Eren Jaeger.” 

“We’re all defending Eren Jaeger,” you argued. 

“Some more than others, maybe,” he agreed. “I have nothing else to offer aside from a direct escort to the captain and the commander.” 

You nodded, offering a quick salute before following him like a puppy through the crowd. 

At the top of wall, there was a little congregation of soldiers who gathered around Armin, each of them nodding and listening intently to whatever it was the blond had to say. You joined the group, resting on your knees and hiding a groan as your the muscle in your back stretched out uncomfortably. 

“y/n!” Armin said, looking cheery. It was a strange display of emotion in the middle of what felt like a living Hell. 

“Armin? Where’s the captain with the white hair?” 

“She’s not here,” Armin explained. “I was the one who asked for you.” 

So the captain hadn’t vouched for you. Although Armin did. 

“You could have called for anyone but you called for the paraplegic?” you said. Armin looked bashful, as he looked down to his scroll of Trost. 

“To be fair, the captain backed me up on it,” he added. 

Oh. So the captain did. 

“We’re just reviewing the plan for Eren.” 

“And we decided to let you do that?” you asked. You were frankly puzzled that Armin, a cadet, was being trusted with such a major task. From the looks of it, the other soldiers agreed. 

You regretted opening your mouth at all because Armin turned red all the way to his ears. “They trusted me because I have a long history with Eren,” he said. It was terrible that he didn’t even sound offended. Rather, apologetic that he’d caused you such a problem. 

You would have rather he called you a bitch and told you to mind your own business. “So where does she play into all of this?” someone asked, pointing their finger at you. 

“Y-Well she-” Armin stammered as he looked all over the map, as if trying to fit you in somewhere. “I’d like Y/n to be right beside Eren, but more realistically, she’d be better at the further ranks. Y/n, it would be ideal for you to be on Eren’s backup team. Can you do it?” 

Sweat coated the back of your neck. You nodded. 

If this plan failed, the world might as well be over. 

Wall Sina could not protect humanity, alone. It simply wouldn’t be enough. Armin used a red detailing pencil to fit you into the map, and he looked to you for confirmation. 

“You’re the man with a plan, blondie,” you told him, your words carefree but your tone stone-dead. “Wherever you want me is where I’ll be.” 

After dismissal, you regrouped with Armin and his friends. You greeted Mikasa and Eren awkwardly. 

You couldn’t help but drag your eyes down, unable to look the Jaeger boy in the face. 

He laughed, the sound bitter. “I guess they’re all scared of me, right? I don’t know why, since it’s not even certain I can transform again.” 

Your eyes shot up, growing wide. “Excuse me? Tell me we’re not taking a gamble on you transforming.” 

Mikasa sent you a sharp glare. “Eren will be fine,” she said firmly. 

“Will he?” you asked. “He was half dead when he did it the first time. I don’t want to offend you, but we have to be realistic. If Eren can’t transform again then the entire plan is lost.” 

Mikasa took half a step forward before Eren stopped her. What would she had done if he hadn’t? Could you even take her on in a fight? Her skills were unparalleled, no matter how talented the others thought you were. 

“Y/n’s right,” Eren said in a low voice. 

“I’m sorry,” Armin suddenly cut in. “I’m sorry that you’re being burdened of all this responsibility.” 

You didn’t have the same ideas Armin did. You weren’t concerned with Eren’s “burden” at the moment. It felt like you all had a burden on your shoulders, but when you looked at it objectively, the entire mission relied on Eren. He’s hardly an adult, and he’s only turned for the first time an hour ago. 

“No,” Eren said, shaking his head. He became so gentle with Armin. “I told you before that you have a gift for strategy. I believe in your plan.” 

“Eren,” Mikasa said quietly. She reached to take hold of his sleeve. “I think it would be best if I went with you.” She seemed so confident as she spoke, that normal Mikasa fire burning in her eyes.

“No, dammit,” Eren said firmly. “You’re apart of the decoy team. “

Mikasa looked genuinely saddened. It was like rejecting a puppy’s nudge for cuddles. “I can’t leave you alone,” she said, her voice wounded. Her fire was doused. 

“I’m not your brother,” Eren said, his voice raising slightly. “I’m not your child, either.”

Your eyes met Armin’s. He looked just as uncomfortable as you did. You both seemed to bond over the fact this was a private conversation.

Mikasa really looked like she would burst into tears at any moment. “Okay,” she said softly. She yielded, though it seemed to be against what she considered her better judgement. You looked between the pair before you nodded yourself out. “I will see you out there,” you muttered before walking away. It would be better to just stay out of their personal affairs, especially right now. You only hope that Mikasa won’t let her feelings cloud her mind out on the field. The last thing you need is her being too distracted to save you from the grasp of a titan. You joined the line up, standing straight as Captain Bresenzka looked you over. 

“So you succeeded, cadet,” she said, her narrow eyes glinting behind her lenses. “All of your friends made it. Is that thanks to you?” 

“No, ma’am,” you said. “Armin Arlert deserves more credit for that. He devised the plan that rescued everyone.” 

She quirked her brow before nodding.

“Alright, everyone,” one of the captains boomed, his voice demanding your attention. “I don’t care what they say about Eren. I don’t care if he really is a human weapon, or not. All I want is that hole sealed. We’re counting on you all to make this work.” 

The large group took off into a run down the wall’s path. You looked out over the horizon that was a crisp gold. It showered light over the titans that clamored over the town. 

As the group closed in on the boulder that was picked for the mission, you noticed that the titans grew more and more sparse. The decoy team on the other half of the town must have been working. Your lungs burned as you saw Eren make a jarring leap off the edge of the wall, his mate Mikasa following a split second after. 

Captain Bresenzka pulled a flare pistol from your belt and fired a signal into the air, the green fumes smelling like smoke in your nose. 

You had one opportunity to catch your breath as the Elites on the squad awaited Eren’s transformation. You didn’t know what to be watching out for. You’d never seen a titan transformation up close. 

But moments later, a familiar zing filled the air, followed by a violent strike of lightening so bright it was unnatural. The taste of the electricity filled the air as Eren’s titan stood up tall and released a war mongering cry. He looked more human than any titan did. Rather, he had a body of correct proportion. Titans are either thin as ice, their skin clinging onto their ribcages grossly, or their bellies are round and wide, filled with their choice of prey. 

But Eren was neither of those. He was muscular, tall, and his hair even had a graceful sort of way of blowing in the wind around his jade eyes. 

You followed the Elites to the rooftops to linger close behind. You watched with anticipation. No amount of humans would be able to lift that boulder, but for Eren in this form, it would probably be like lifting a bale of hay over his head. 

He lingered close for a moment. You frowned, half expecting him to struggle for a few minutes. 

Then, he spun around and took a winding punch at one of the buildings Mikasa rested on. And it wasn’t enough for him to miss. His eyes followed her as she darted up, like a lizard on a wall, and he struck again. 

“We failed,” Captain Bresenzka swore as she jostled around for her tin of flares. “We never should have pinned our hopes to something we don’t fully understand.” 

The red smoke fired into the sky as you scaled a chimney. You called out Mikasa’s name. She was gripping Eren by the hair, her feet pushed firmly onto his large teeth for support. “Get out of there!” you shouted to her.

She split a second before Eren lunged-at you.

His body seemed to be falling over you, as if he was trying to take the entire house down. You slipped off the chimney, a piece of brick shredding deep into your leg as you did so, and you narrowly escaped. 

Mikasa pulled you to safety, helping you stand as one of Captain Dietriech swore loudly. “So the kid’s been a regular titan this entire time?!” he exclaimed. 

You looked at Mikasa deeply in the eyes as she held you up. Your chest heaved as you tried to catch your breath. “What happened?” you wheezed. 

“I don’t know,” she said quietly. Her voice is filled with regret. 

“We need to leave,” someone else exclaimed. “We’ve got a 12 meter bastard coming on us. The kid’s out of the play.”

“He’s right,” Captain Bresenzka agreed. “We should withdrawal immediately. We’ll have to leave Eren as he is.” 

Mikasa became vicious upon hearing the words. You could feel her desperation as clearly as you could feel her thin hands gripping your sleeves. 

“How could you say that?” Mikasa hissed. Her teeth ground together on their edges, and you had to wrench your arms out of her iron like grip. Captain Dietreich even seemed to shiver under Mikasa’s gaze. 

“We did the best we could,” Mitabi urged Dietreich. “It was a bust. We’ve got to accept that it isn’t going to work!”

Mikasa took a flourishing step, her arm already swinging to catch velocity so she could push Mitabi to his end.

“Enough, Ackerman,” Dietreich eased her. 

You looked back to Eren. He said up against the boulder, shoulders and head slumped down as if he were contemplating his entire life. Maybe he was. 

“Change of plans,” Dietreich said gruffly. “Defend Jaeger until he recovers.” 

Bresenzka made a floundering stumble towards the captain, her eyes wide behind her glasses. “Are you out of your mind?” she cried. “We-”

“We,” Ian said firmly, “are replicable. Eren is not. He’s the last chance we have to make things work. His gift is a remarkable one, even if he can’t utilize it right now. It’s our duty to do so.”

“He’s a failure,” Bresenzka bemoaned. “He got soldiers killed. Good soldiers, soldiers I’ve known since my days as a cadet. Look at him! He’s punched his own hands off. You want to get more of us killed, just so you can save that?” 

The captain had a point. Eren had lunged at Mikasa, and he’d lunged at you, and he’d been so violent that his hands broke off. He was smoking from where the bones in his wrist had splintered. 

“That’s correct,” Ian bit back. He was holding back spasms of anger as he clenched his fists by his side. “I expect you to do the same. Hell, I’m making a judgement call. That boy’s power is all we have. You know it. So unless you’ve got a better plan, keep your mouth shut!”

Bresenzka’s chin dimpled as her jaw clenched hard enough to break her teeth. “If by better plan, you mean a way to get rid of these titans, than no. I don’t know. Obviously.” 

“And that,” Ian said, “is exactly why we’re not retreating.”

The staggering silence that followed was deafening. You could practically hear the thoughts churning in the captain’s mind as she visibly mulled her friend’s words over. 

“...Fine.” 

“Fine?” Ian repeated. 

“Yes,” the captain said sharply, “fine. It’s not as if I want to disagree with you. Don’t you think that I also want to avenge my lost friends? I also want to live in a world of peace. I would like to have just one fight that doesn’t end in our attrition.” 

She used a shaking hand to brush her light bangs from her face. “If this is what my orders are, then I will follow them.” 

Bresenzka leapt away to take care of the 12 meter, while Mitabi cracked his fingers and neck. “I guess we’ve got this,” he said to Dietreich before rushing towards the other titans that were approaching. 

Mikasa cleared her throat to capture Deitreich’s attention. “Thank you,” she said. “That was brave, standing up to them the way you did.”

Dietreich could hardly make a joke out of it as he passed Mikasa’s words off. “It wasn’t bravery. I was speaking the truth. Fact of the matter is,” he said as he cast a look towards Mikasa, “I was afraid of the mess you might have gotten yourself into. But you’re free to go, now. Make use of your natural skills, the both of you.” He addressed you, now, and you were shocked to hear it. “You’re both on this Elite squad for a reason.”

He looked at Mikasa next, a strange sort of smile on his mouth. “Now, go. Protect the man you love.” 

Mikasa’s pale face became red as her scarf, which she tugged at to hide behind. “It’s not like that with Eren,” she was stammering; but Ian already left. 

You looked at Mikasa with careful regard, half afraid to say the wrong thing. “Well, it’s not!” Mikasa exclaimed again. You couldn’t help but find it amusing-she’d never been the ‘normal’ type of girl. She had never shown any sort of emotion before. But now, even during the chaos of the day, she was blushing like crazy, all because her crush on Eren was finally acknowledged. 

“At least you have someone to love,” you pointed out. You hadn’t considered it before, but it must be nice to be in love. 

Especially to have someone be in love with you. 

That thought weighed particularly heavy on your mind as your gear zipped while you tore through the sky. Not many titans were drawn to the sight of Eren, or even the sight of you twirling around the air. The decoys must have been doing an excellent job on the other side of the district. 

What would happen? What would they do, especially now that the red flare has signaled Eren’s failure? 

Your blades steamed with the blood of three small titans whom you had killed consecutively. Your lungs burned as you latched your gears onto the side of a taller church and rested your head against the rough stone. 

With a wheeze, you looked out to the sun once more. It would have to be low noon by now. There is still several hours till nightfall, but you can’t help worrying that you won’t survive to see your bed. 

There came a crash and puff of debris in the air each time a titan went down. The sounds were reassuring enough, but you still couldn’t catch a break. It started to seem that when you killed two titans, four more would appear. The numbers were slowly increasing. Had they become bored by the display of prey they could not catch? The decoys must have slowly lost priority, as they burned more energy trying to catch what would just be a light snack. 

You hear your name being cried out, and before you can look around, you feel the large fingers of a titan pick you up by the hair. You screamed and thrashed, your blades cutting into his palms enough for you to slip out of his grip. 

“Y/n!” someone shouted again as you scrambled to the rooftop Mikasa was watching Eren from. 

You bit your tongue, trying not to cry as you palmed the crown of your head. Sticky blood stained your hand, and you could feel it slipping down your neck. “It’d be great if Eren woke up, now,” you said with a taut voice. 

Mikasa did look after Eren’s large form, slumped against the boulder that had once been a beacon of hope. You noticed the splintered ends of his arms had not yet formed hands. “I thought he would regenerate,” you told her as smeared your blood onto your pants. 

“I thought so, too,” Mikasa said coolly. “I thought...well, it doesn’t matter what I thought. There are more and more titans drawing in.” 

“I noticed,” you groaned. “They must be getting sick of the decoys.” 

Mikasa pointed her blade out, towards the gate where four 10 meter titans were stumbling in like drunkards. “Two and two?”

“Why not?” you grumbled. 

Mikasa’s running steps were in complete unison with yours, and together, you both leapt off the roof and tore through the wind. It stung your eyes as you navigated to the titans. 

You don’t want to be angry with her, or with Eren, or even with Armin. You’re angry at something, or someone. Someone had to get Eren to snap out of it. You don’t care who. You’d go over yourself to cut him out and slap some sense into him if Mikasa would let you, but she’d likely kill you before you got the blade mounted in his nape. 

You took out your two titans with ease. As you wiped sweat from your brow, you could see that more and more were trampling the distract grounds. It felt so close to being done. 

Yes, you’ve felt that way several times in the past few hours, but right now, it feels real. It’s a suffocating feeling of dread that passed over you, leaving you to burst into a fit of trailing tears. Your life would end today. It would, right? It wasn’t Eren’s fault, it wasn’t a matter of ‘fault.’ It is a matter of the world being the way it is. 

You thought of the dream you’d had not but forty minutes ago, of the slender hands stretching towards you from the water’s floor. 

The rumbling and the crash caught your attention. Half of you expected to look up and see the wall crumbling to pieces. But your eyes beheld a most beautiful sight. Eren Jaeger’s muscular titan body cradled the boulder on his shoulder. 

His steps boomed across the district and as they did you couldn’t help but scream and jump with joy. You cupped your hands around your mouth and yelled as strongly as you could, “Go, Eren!” 

You’d marry that boy. That’s how happy you are at the moment. You zoomed into the air, seized by the sudden confidence that life would be great; that you’d die an old woman surrounded by friends and family and content with the world you were leaving. You conquered every titan you came across, their corpses toddling to the ground like babies walking down the stairs for the first time. 

For such a large figure, Eren moved awfully slow. You wheezed for air as you followed after the titans that Mitabi’s team was distracting. The floundering humans must have been like mice to a cat sine the titans turned a blind eye to Eren. He moved to goddamn slow. You silently urged for Eren to burst into a quick sprint. For a titan it would take no more than ten seconds to jog across the lot and block the wall off. But Eren was already feeling weak anyways. That’s all you can assume since he’d been out of order. 

His body steamed as he shook across the way. You flocked to the outer rim of the formation that focused on distracting the titans. A smaller, flightier abnormal crawled down the roads like a lizard up a wall. You flew into the air, surfing the windstream and landing uneasily on the titan’s back. He didn’t stop like you’d expected to. You staked a blade into the titan’s shoulder to steady yourself as he galloped straight for Eren. Your arms burned as you crawled up the way to his nape. You held onto the handle of your blade as you stood. For a moment it felt like freedom in its most euphoric form. You rode the titan as it raced to Eren and at the cusp of him leaping into Eren’s path, you sliced a large chunk out of his nape. The titan shuddered beneath your feet, and you clutched onto the rough strands of hair to keep from flying off the corpse and into a building. 

You rolled to the ground with a cough as dust kicked up into your face. 

You stumbled out of the burning cloud of steam, coughing into your elbow as you looked around. You saw Eren just reaching the gape in the wall. With a roar that made you clutch your ears, Eren doubled over and set the boulder straight into the wall. The wall rumbled as stone grated against stone, pieces of dust flying up around Eren’s face. 

Your sank to your knees, clutching your back that screamed out in pain. You were grateful. Grateful to be alive, even if the stabbing feeling in your back made you want to die. Grateful for the people that had given their lives for this mission. 

You limped towards Eren’s kneeling figure. “Mikasa!” You called as you clutched your back. “We’ve got to get back.�� 

The green smoke had been shot out as a sign that the mission was successful.  But as much as you’d wished it was over...

Captain Bresenzka alerted you as she jogged straight to your side. “The reinforcements will be on their way, but there are still titans that haven’t cleared out of the city.”

“She won’t leave without Eren,” you told the captain. You ran unevenly down the walkway of loose wood, falling in line with Mikasa. “Armin...?” you asked her through a gasp. 

“He arrived to help with Eren,” Mikasa told you. She cupped her hands around her mouth as she called to the blond. “How is he?!”

“H-He’s passed out,” Armin called back, sounding breathless as he struggled to cut Eren free from his second form. “He’s also scorching hot.” 

Captain Bresenzka followed you and Mikasa to sit on the hunched back of Eren’s second body. You were in awe at the sight. His limbs were engulfed in the inflamed tendons of his other self. It felt twice as hot by the open nape than it did in the sauna. 

Armin tried to tug Eren from the fusion, and the sound was like a thick rubber band being stretched to the max. “He’s fused to the carcass!” Armin exclaimed. 

“We could cut fifty centimeters past where his hands should be,” you said, running your hands down the steaming muscle and trying to feel for Eren’s limbs. 

“There’s not time to be so safe,” the captain said stonily. “We cut him out now.” 

“Wait!” Mikasa exclaimed frantically. “We don’t know what that could do! What if he heals wrong?” 

But the captain didn’t listen. “Move over,” you said to Armin, taking your arms around Eren to pull him back and make the muscle as taut as possible.  The captain sliced through the stringy mass while Mikasa closed her eyes, beads of tears slipping into her long eyelashes. You could tell she cared deeply for Eren. 

Perhaps she did love him. 

You couldn’t imagine withstanding the sight of the man you loved in such a state. 

Captain Brezenska sliced too quickly before you could push Eren down to his side. You tumbled down the carcass’s back with Eren’s limp body falling on top of you. 

Your skin burned as you were wedged between Eren’s feverish body and the hard ground. Tears formed in your eyes as you felt a sharp stone puncture the skin of your back and molest that goddamned spot that bothered you daily. 

You wriggled beneath the young man. “Wake up, Jaeger,” you said firmly. 

Your eyes went wide as they caught sight of the anomolies that covered all the sunshine the setting sun was casting. 

“Wake up, Eren!” you screamed. 

Two large titans beamed down at you. 

You shook Eren as hard as you could, screaming for help from someone, anyone. 

That dream flashed before your eyes. Those pale hands were reaching for you out of love; they were going to drag you down to the pits of hell. You’d mistaken their beautiful nimbleness, their delicacy, for kindness. 

Just when you thought everything would end, a large splash of blood splat from the two titans, promptly dropping dead.

You dropped your head back against the stone, sobbing in relief. 

Eren stirred in your arms, sitting up so that you were both supporting each other’s weight. “We’re saved,” you rasped in Eren’s ear. “It was Mikasa,” you said as you watched her kneel on her kill. 

It was not Mikasa. Mikasa had leapt from the shoulder of Eren’s titan, kneeling beside you and Eren. She scooped him into her arms, quietly thanking you. But thanking you for what? 

“Who is that?” Mikasa asked as she hastily brushed Eren’s hair from his sweaty forehead. 

You looked up to see your savior, whose figure blocked out the setting sun. The forest green cloak did not wield solemn red roses, or even the gaudy blades that announced the cadets. 

The figure gracefully navigated down to the ground. 

You were in shock when you saw the face of the person that had saved you. He was starkly beautiful, his face all sculpted, fine edges, and his eyes steely grey. But they were narrow, glaring at all three of you cadets as he sheathed his steaming blades. “This is the part where someone tells me what’s going on,” he said sternly. 

You stammered for the words to answer the man as you staggered to your feet. 

“Y/n!” Mikasa shouted. 

She rushed to your side, Eren miraculously forgotten, and placed a warm hand over your back. “You’re bleeding,” you told her, feeling her fingers smear warm, sticky blood into your back. 

“That’s you,” Mikasa said. 

You strained to look back at your wound. A large stain of blood certainly did cover your shirt. The rock. You recalled that puncture you’d felt when Eren fell on top of you, but it hadn’t felt that bad. 

“It’s nothing,” you brushed it off, attempting to salute to the new man. 

The earth seemed to tumble beneath your feet. You slipped on nothing and fell to the ground, becoming a crumpled heap of blood and sweat at Mikasa’s feet. 

The strange man knelt above you, his intimidating eyes peering deep into yours. “She’s already half gone,” he said plainly. 

“I’m not,” you argued, your voice raspy.

The man turned you to your side. He pulled your shirt up to catch sight of your wound. “She needs immediate medical attention,” he said before he pushed you to lay flat. 

“Bad day, lieutenant?” he said, gripping you by the hand tightly to keep you awake. 

“’M not a lieutenant,” you rasped, wrenching your hand away. “I’m a cadet.” 

“Color me shocked,” the man said, looking mildly surprised. “Hey shit heads,” he said, looking after someone else. “Get someone!” 

“Who should we get?” Armin’s voice replied at a vague distance. 

“Fucking hell,” the man said. He looked down at you with a pinched expression of frustration. “I’m sure death feels like a better option than working with those idiots,” he told you. “But you’re not going.” 

“I’m not going to die,” you told him. “I’m not...”

“Hey!” He shook your shoulders hard, your head rattling about. “Get your eyes open, that’s an order,” he demanded. 

“I’m not dying,” you scowled. “I’m just slipping,” you said. “I’m slipping in the water. I think that it’s you.” 

“Who’s me?” he asked. 

“I think you’re the man from my dreams,” you told him before finally closing your eyes. 

[puckslibrary]

Crooked Kingdom Review

Hello hello! Since I’m desperately waiting on more news about the Shadow and Bone tv series I figured now would be a good time to write my Crooked Kingdom review. In the interest of saving time, I have decided to forego the non spoiler review, (sorry) so if you haven’t read this book, I’d recommend skipping this post entirely.

//SPOILER REVIEW//

Oh boy, where do I start...This book stressed me tf out (in a good way). In an interview Leigh mentioned that she wanted the reader to feel claustrophobic as the entirety of Ketterdam turns on the gang, and to say she succeeded is an understatement. The stakes felt higher in this book, and I felt like I was trying to keep track of 5 different games of chess simultaneously. What struck me even more than the plot was the characters. Kaz is still my favorite and every bit as iconic (take a drink every time I say “iCoNiC”) as in the first book. We definitely got to see different sides of him this time around as he’s lost without Inej, and was thrown for a loop quite a few times by Rollins and Van Eck. His fight with Jesper stressed me out upon first reading but now I just find the whole situation comical. They really are just teenage boys who don’t know how to handle their emotions properly. Not only that, but it exhibited that Kaz views both Jordie and Jesper as people who he trusted (and still wants to trust irrevocably) but has let him down in some way. Kaz accidentally calling Jesper “Jordie” is such a raw moment; “Dirtyhands” would never make that mistake, but Kaz would, and I loved it. Also, Kaz fighting off the Dregs in order to seize power from Per Haskell? Iconic. It’s entertaining to see how quickly everything falls apart with Inej gone, and seeing literally everyone feeling her absence in one way or another. “He’ll never trade if you break me!” hurt my soul on a spiritual level, and I’m glad Kaz proved her wrong. I felt like a proud mother reading her fight with Dunyasha. Her line about surviving when you’re not “the chosen one” was so powerful and really encapsulates why people love/relate to these characters so much. It makes me so incredibly happy to know she got her freedom, her ship, and her family back. There were so many great moments between her and Kaz, ranging from the ending scene (aka me LOSING IT over my otp just HOLDING HANDS) and the ever iconic bathroom scene don't even get me STARTED I could talk about it for HOURS but now is not the time and I so desperately wish we could see more. Speaking of iconic (take a drink) couples, Wylan and Jesper have my entire heart and I am SO incredibly happy that we got to see Wylan’s perspective. He quickly became a new favorite of mine (as I expected) and seeing him have to confront his own insecurities AND his father was not only incredibly satisfying, but fueled the plot in a massive way. As for Jesper, I was ecstatic that we got a bit more of his backstory and a solid reason as to why he ignores his power as a fabrikator. His love for his father made me love him even more and the relationship between Jesper and Colm is such a stark contrast from that of Wylan and Jan. I saw the Kuwei/Wylan mix up from a mile away but it still hurt to read. I don’t blame Kuwei though, I would’ve kissed Jesper too. On a completely different note; Nina and Matthias. Matthias’ death was incredibly unexpected and in my opinion, unnecessary. That doesn’t make it any less tragic, but still. I’m so incredibly proud of Matthias’ growth, and using his last moments before getting shot to attempt to change the prejudiced views of a young drüskelle (like Nina did for him) was outstanding. The last chapter from his perspective was heartbreaking, but at least he finally found some peace from his nightmares. Nina trying to bring him back was equally as heartbreaking, and her strength throughout the entire book as she struggled with her jurda parem addiction was incredible to read. I’m in love with the idea of her being one of the only known survivors of the drug AND her previous powers being inverted, not a perversion as she originally thought, but a unique new skill set used to her advantage. OH topic change, but the ending chapter with Inej instilling the fear of God (or I guess the saints??) into Pekka Rollins? Absolutely ICONIC fantastic and I couldn’t have thought of a better way to end the book. That’s a lot, so I’ll leave my review at that.

Alright, thanks for sticking around if you’ve made it this far! I would absolutely love it if you would like, reblog, and follow! If you enjoyed that chaotic review, there’s more to come,(“Missing of Clairdelune” next…) and I hope wherever y’all are, you are having a lovely day! See you next time! :)