sakata-no-anzu

[sakata-no-anzu]

08. What is, perhaps, their biggest flaw? Are they aware of this or oblivious to it?

Anzu’s greatest flaw would likely be her lack of confidence and belief in herself. While she’s far better at that than she used to be, she still does not think particularly highly of herself, despite what everyone else tells her.

[sakata-no-anzu]

Get to know my character

Reblog this so your followers can spam your ask box. Have fun! ♥

01. What does your character’s name mean? Did you pick it for the symbolism, or did you just like the way it sounded? 02. What is one of your character’s biggest insecurities? Are they able to hide it easily or can others easily exploit this weakness? 03. What would be their favorite physical trait about themselves? 04. What are their favorite traits about their lover? (one psychological and one physical) 05. Are they sexually confident or more of the shy type? 06. Do they have any hobbies that their lover finds unusual, odd, or otherwise annoying? 07. Is there a catchphrase or sound that they tend to make a lot (likely without being aware of it)? 08. What is, perhaps, their biggest flaw? Are they aware of this or oblivious to it? 09. Do they have a favorite season? What about a favorite holiday? 10. Is your character more feminine or masculine? 11. What is something that would make your character fly into a rage? 12. Is there some particular talent, skill, or attribute that they simply could not give up? 13. What are your character’s sleeping habits? Heavy or light sleeper? Blanket stealer? One that always rolls onto the floor? Pushes their lover onto the floor? Sleep talker or walker? 14. Do they live alone or with family? How do they feel about their family/roommates? 15. Is there a certain person in this world that they cannot stand? The very mention of this person’s name makes them tremble with anger or fear. 16. Is your character the athletic type or more of a couch potato? What are some sports/games that they like? 17. Does your character have dreams of getting married and/or having children? 18. What kind of home would they want to live in? Where would they place this abode? 19. Would your character be the kind to get into fights? (physical or verbal) Would they be a good fighter or cave in rather easily? 20. Does your character like animals? What are some of their favorite animals? Would they want pets? What about mythological creatures? 21. What is one of your character’s biggest fears? How would they react when dealing with this fear? 22. What kind of tattoos, piercings, birthmarks, freckles, and other such unique physical features do they have? 23. What is your character like when it comes to school? What subjects are they good/bad at? Do they get in trouble a lot or are well behaved? 24. In their own words, how would your character describe what their lover is like? 25. Is there something traumatic from your character’s past that greatly affects them even to this day? 26. What is their lover like sexually? How do they feel about their lover’s quirks, needs, etc? 27. If your character was going to get arrested, what would be the most likely reason for it? 28. If your character became a celebrity, what would they be famous for? 29. What is one of the most courageous things your character has ever done for a loved one? 30. When it comes to the arts (music, film, theater, etc), what does your character like? 31. Would your character be the kind capable of killing? Would they enjoy killing or only use it when necessary or, perhaps, refuse to kill no matter what? 32. If your character’s lover offered to take them out on a dream date, what would they want to do? 33. If your character wanted to be alone, where would they go? 34. Does your character have favorite foods? (breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks, etc) 35. Is your character afraid of death? If they got to choose how to die, how would they want to go? 36. Does your character have any medical conditions? Are they serious or minor? Do they affect their day to day life? 37. What are some of your character’s pet peeves? What are some things that annoy them or disgust them? 38. What kind of weather does your character like? Cloudy skies, rainy days, sunshine, etc? 39. When people look at your character, is there some assumption they might make about them just by appearance? Is that assumption correct? 40. Does your OC have any guilty pleasures they enjoy? Hobbies, past times, music, etc that they wouldn’t want known by others? 41. Does your character’s family affect your character in any way? 42. Is there anything in your character’s past that they regret, haunts them, or they wish they could change? 43. Does your character have a switch that changes aspects of their personality whether they are around friends, family, etc. Is there someone who gets to see their true self? 44. Is there a particular event that would emotionally devastate your character? 45. Is your character the kind to hide their true emotions or do they wear their heart on their sleeve?

46. What is some random affectionate thing that your character always does to their lover? 47. Is your character outgoing? Would they be the leader of the friend group, or the quiet one that gets dragged along? 48. Is there anything in particular that would ignite your character’s jealousy? Or does your character not get envious? 49. What is something that your character has nightmares about? Are these frequent? Do they heavily affect your character’s mood? 50. If your character confessed love to their crush, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc, what would they say?

[sakata-no-anzu]

⚠ - What has your character almost done that made someone talk them out of or convince them not to do it?

“Uhm...” Anzu shifted in her seat, figiting a bit uncomfortably. “I g-guess it would be...the time I tried to convince Tera...to leave me, a while ago. B-because I was in a bad place mentally and...at the time believed I didn’t deserve her, and she’d be happier with someone else. She uhm...did not let me convince her. I am grateful for that, because even then, I still loved her, and I love her now but...I was in a really bad place then.”

[sakata-no-anzu]

Get to know my character through an ask!

🍰 - What is their favorite type of dessert or sweet? 🐢 - What type of animal would they keep for a pet? 🐙 - They are crossing the ocean. What are the circumstances and how did they get there? 🌎 - If money were no object, where would they live and what would they do with their life? (Ex: entrepreneur, playboy, philanthropist, etc) 🎂 - Do they celebrate their birthday? 🎓 - Are they well-educated? 📬 - A mysterious letter has just been found in their mailbox.  How does your character react?  Who would it be from? ⌚ - Is your character punctual or procrastinator? 💰 - Your character just found a fat sack of gold on a bench. What do they do with it? 👙 - Is your character trendy or do they just not give a damn? 🎠 - Your character is at the carnival.  What kinds of rides or games do they check out to entertain themselves? 🔮 - Your character is having their future told by someone pretty shady. Do they call the fortune teller out or just roll with it? 🎃 - What is your character’s favorite holiday? 🎶 - What would your character say about your personal taste in music? 💒 - Does your character want marriage or a lifelong commitment? ♓ - Hey baby, what’s your sign? What would your character’s zodiac sign be and what qualities do they carry to make them fall under that sign? 🚼 - Does your character have or want kids? ⚠ - What has your character almost done that made someone talk them out of or convince them not to do it? ♿ - Is your character in some way handicapped? (This includes physical, emotional, and mental.) 💊 - Is your character on medication?  If so, why? 🌞🌜 - Is your character an early bird or night owl? What makes them that way? 📚 - Does your character read? 📓 - If your character keeps a journal, what is the most secret thought they keep in it? 📰 - An obituary for your character was found in the local paper this morning. What did it say? 💢 - What frustrates your character more than anything? ✌ - Your character just made a trespass against someone else, how would they go about righting it given the chance?  Or would they at all? 🍴 - What is the absolute worst meal your character has ever eaten? Were they verbal about it or did they just not say anything? 🍜 - Carnivore/Pescatarian/Vegetarian/Vegan/Other? What kind of diet does your character have? �� - Your character was just kissed by someone they can’t stand. Why and how did it happen? 😇 - What was your character’s last good deed? 😁 - Someone just tripped and fell in front of your character.  Do they laugh or help the person up? 😨 - Your character just broke wind in public. Do they try to hide it or own up to it? 😍 - Your character’s lust object just passed right by them. How awkward do they get as they try to make conversation? 😒 - “Ugh!  Not him/her/them/it again.” How does your character react to annoying people? 😂 - Your character is moved to tears. What’s a kindness that another showed to them? 😄 - What has ever made your character laugh so hard that they almost passed out? 😈 - What’s your character’s favorite cuss word? 😏 - Is your character having a dirty thought right now? 🍺 - Cheers! What is your character’s favorite alcoholic beverage?  What was the last thing they got smashed off of? 💫 - Your character is suffering memory loss after being knocked unconscious.  What happens afterwards and how did it happen? 💡 - What is the best idea your character ever had? 💍 - Does your character wear any type of jewelry? ⛪ - Is your character religious or spiritual in anyway? 🎱 - Your character and a talking raccoon walk into a bar… 📼 - An interrogation tape emerges regarding a recent interview with your character.  What are they being questioned for? 👟 - Is your character into personal fitness?  If so, what’s their exercise routine? 📺 - What would your character’s favorite TV show be?  What’s their favorite genre?

🍀 - Does your character carry a good luck charm? Do they believe in luck?

[sakata-no-anzu]

Journal Entry, 24s, 2AM

This past tenday has been a mix of happiness and trepidation.

Mercer and X��khal’a’s wedding was about a tenday ago, and Tera accompanied me. It was a cute evening, but I could not help but feel that something was amiss with L’yhta, that she was feeling down, something Tera also noticed (ever perceptive as she is), but we did not find a good time to talk to her.

Later on that evening, after the reception and after everyone else had left to go find rest, Tera pulled me aside and asked me to marry her, as well – and of course I said yes. I would be a fool not to, for I love her with all my heart and want nothing more than to spend my life with her.

The next few days, L’yhta seemed to be in a much brighter mood, which relieved me as well. Whatever was happening, she seemed to have had resolved to greater or lesser extent. I can very much relate to having a heart and mind cruel enough to oneself that it can take away any happiness one might feel by focusing on perceived failings and what others might think. It is something I struggle with too, so I was glad to see that she was alright.

I have not written in ages, so I should likely write about the Auracite incident, and all that happened the tenday before, but that should be another entry. I am getting sidetracked.

But, just the other day, a Hingan man came to the Tower with a terrible pain in his chest, and before we could do anything, he began shifting and warping, turning into a red mockery of a Garlean form. Auracite was the cause, and while we swiftly vanquished the creature, it was too late to save the man.

And then, when we were seeing to anyone who was wounded, the auracite shard exploded, sending crystalline fragments into several different people, myself included. It felt like someone else was completely taking over my mind, body and soul, and there was so much rage, anger and hatred…

Then “Leo”, the being in the auracite, made me attack Kahlua. Luckily I am not nearly as strong physically as she is, and she was able to pull the crystal out of my shoulder, but I still feel bad, even if it is not my fault.

The worst thing though is the memories. Of the inside of the Castrum, the torture and experimentation on Leo’s form – memories that aren’t mine but are similar enough to the memories of my own torture that it’s extremely difficult to sort Leo’s from my own.

Sleep did not come that night, and I spent much of the next day in an insomniac haze. Tera stayed with me the night of the second auracite incident, and I am thankful for that – she is ever a rock of comfort in my life, but I could not sleep – both out of fear of the nightmares, and my mind just refusing to wind down.

Sleep came last night, in fact I just woke up, but it was restless and filled with both my memories and Leo’s.

This is not the Hingan man’s fault, the poor soul. It is not the fault of anyone at the Tower, and it is not mine. But it is still terrifying.

- 杏子 -

[sakata-no-anzu]

((A dramatic pose.))

[sakata-no-anzu]

This blog is for Anzu Sakata, an OC from Doma.

Hello all! 

This is a BRAND NEW masterlist blog for muses within the FFXIV fandom. Please reblog this post if you are a muse in the FFXIV fandom, and you shall be added to the MASTERLIST. OC’s and CANON MUSES both welcome! Multimuse blogs are also welcome to reblog this if you have a muse in the FFXIV fandom. Please dont reblog this if you are a character from another fandom with a FFXIV verse, or a fandomless OC with a FFXIV verse. Check the GUIDELINES for more info! 

When reblogging, please write your muse’s NAME, if it’s a CANON MUSE or an OC MUSE, and which NATION your muse comes from. Thank you! 

[sakata-no-anzu]

Worlds Apart

Three Days Ago, Mor Dhona, Outside the Crystal Tower

Anzu collapsed a little onto the ground, breathing heavily, a faint white glow to her eyes vanishing as she dispelled her aether sight. There had been so much need to use the spell, to look at residue from the spell that whisked half the Tower away to another world, to trying to find a place where a breach would be most likely, but she was painfully aware that the spell was slowly killing her. Yet, she'd turned up almost nothing. She had no idea how to reach the others.

Anzu sat down with her back against the cliff behind her, staring upwards at the Tower - the massive beacon that seemed to be mirrored wherever the others were. The linkpearl was, for a couple of days, linked together by using the Crystal Tower on their side - but the recent destruction of that link completely severed her connection with everyone, and with L'yhta's soul missing, everyone on both worlds seemed to be looking to her for answers.

Answers I don't have, Anzu mused darkly to herself. She stood up, knees wobbling a bit as she moved. She hadn't slept in days, even when she had been trying to. Her every waking thought was consumed by fear and anxiety - fear for L'yhta's soul, and everyone else's safety. Fear of being unable to help any of them. Fear of being useless, and letting everyone down.

So here, at the Crystal Tower, she stayed. If sleep wasn't going to come to her, then she could at least try to be productive.

But she'd turned up nothing. Sure, the fabric between worlds here was weaker, but and the Sword That Sings was able to tear a momentary hole into the rift, but spilling out into the nothingness between worlds wasn't helpful at all.

Anzu had a feeling she knew where the answer to creating a stable gate lied, but the thought filled her mind with dread at what kind of sacrifice it would entail. The answer was in Mhachi, in the Black, and the Elementals would only loathe her for such a thing were she to figure out how to modify a void gate to reach their world of Light and pull them back.

But what choice do I have?

Turning to her side, Anzu gritted her teeth and punched the crystallized cliff beside her - not hard enough to hurt herself, but enough to vent her frustration, as she cried out in Hingan, "<Why can't I find the answer?! Why am I the one they're looking to?! Why can’t I find the damned answer?!>"

Tears were wiped away by her gloved hand, and a sob choked back as she gathered up her new thaumaturge's rod and leaned on it to stand up. She couldn't think properly, even common was starting to elude her - the typical symptoms of a complete lack of sleep. But sleep was not finding her, no matter how hard she tried.

There was just too much at stake...

[sakata-no-anzu]

Journal Entry, 6s 5UM

There is no closure nor ending for those like us, it seems.

Motokawa-no-Ajisai walked back into our life today, and shattered the hesitant peace we’d known for a few weeks without intending to. Her son was feeling ill and almost like a different person for the last couple of weeks, and she came to us seeking help and advice. When we went over to their house in Doma, the boy was gone and the Sword That Sings found remnants of a teleport spell, which Mihata and I were able to convince an otter kami to help us trace it towards the Black Shroud.

Ajisai spoke of a song that her son kept hearing these past couple of weeks, and L’yhta spoke of a song heard too. I can’t help but think this is ominous.

And I was just settling back into normal-ish life again, after my internal upheaval back into self loathing, and being pulled back from the brink by Tera’s selfless love.

Whether or not I am able, it seems like I might have to learn fast how to stand on my own feet, because it seems like something big is happening.

Why is it that the Shadows seem to move with every breath we take? None of us are the bloody Warrior of Light.

I think I might be needing to use aether sight enough with all of these magickal goings-on lately that I might be severely shortening my lifespan.

Bloody hells. My head hurts and I just want to sleep right now.

- 杏子 -

[sakata-no-anzu]

An offering of prayer to the kami at the Swallow’s Compass.

[sakata-no-anzu]

(( @eteraahmun makes a great leaning post. ))

[sakata-no-anzu]

This is as close as I could get to Anzu with this. It doesn't do au ra horns very well.

Presenting: an AU modern L’yhta.

>> Find the dollmaker here. <<

Tagged by: @hanidahlia, thank you! :)

Tagging: @paleshadeofrose, @pale-eastern-star, @lalaliya, @lydha-lran, @eteraahmun, @lyhia, @stormscream, @mercermachines, @sakata-no-anzu, @steelcarbuncle, @kimiko-ffxiv, @dmlynx, and anyone else who wants to do it!

[sakata-no-anzu]

Journal Entry, 10s 5AM

Why does my heart ache so?

The day I try to mourn my family, fights break out amongst the Tower and I am powerless to cease the arguing, too absorbed in my own tears and sorrows was I. I miss my family so dearly some days and the pain seems worse than before now.

And of course, the darkness of that night just reminded me of my own failings. No matter what I do, that small but very forceful and assertive part of my mind always says to me "You are tainted. You are broken. Nothing will fix that."

Is that true? Am I doomed to suffer a lifetime of misery because of what others did to me and my friends and family? It makes no sense when I write it on paper but the siren song of misery makes it make perfect sense in my mind.

Once again I wonder why Tera puts up with me, and stays with me. Why she even cares at all. I love her dearly, and I am not going to leave her, but I still can't help but think she deserves someone more stable and normal than I, the one who habitually shuts herself in her room to hide away from the world when she's overwhelmed and miserable.

The fact that these thoughts, and the nightmares that come with them, are returning with such vigor is terrifying.

I hate myself for feeling this way, but I hate myself for what broke me. I feel like a nonsensical paradox.

[sakata-no-anzu]

Two adorable nerds. @sakata-no-anzu

[sakata-no-anzu]

((/gpose is fun. Silly glamours are also fun. In no way at all is this screenshot in character. Features @zterarinn on the right))

[sakata-no-anzu]

Journal Entry, 19s, 3UM

It has been so long since I last wrote in this book. I intended it to chronicle my climb out of depression, and I suppose it served that purpose, more or less. My days, while filled with worry over recent events, find my self loathing ever more disappearing day by day. One day, I will have to write down an overview of what has happened in the intervening two years, for posterity and to leave a record of who I am, and what I have done, but for now I will write on recent events.

The most important thing that has happened to me in a long, long time was meeting Tera. When she walked into my life (or, since I met her at a public event her company was hosting, I walked into hers?), there was a sort of instant connection between us. She is Ala Mhigan, and we have both lost so many loved ones, and lost our homes to Garlemald, and a kinship from our similar experiences formed, even if those experiences were a half a world apart.

It did not take long after that before we began dating. She is strong and fierce, but also gentle and sweet, a shining light in my life. (Which, given her shadowy fighting style, seems mildly ironic, but is very true nonetheless)

What's more, the folk of the Tower approve of her as well, and her own friends and family approve of me, despite the fact that I am a Raen, and she is a Miqo'te. I cannot help but think my family would disapprove if they were still here, but, even if they were still here, she is too dear to me to let that stop me.

But, for now, I don't plan on dwelling too much on older events. I will get to a long summary of that, hopefully, but for now, I am tired and need to focus on current events.

We have been encountering beasts that steal aether. As a mage, I was utterly helpless before them, so I took up training my body physically and learning to use a greatsword. It seemed a good idea, at least to me, to be able to fight without using aether in situations like this.

We found an ancient, time-enchanted greatsword, and one that has been repaired now after a trip into a giant colossus for some materials.

Oh yeah, apparently our enemies placed a ten million gil bounty upon my head, to "avenge Aislin", which is just utterly fantastic. In the venture into the colossus, I think all of us were wounded to a degree, but Elrick and Kellach certainly had it the worst, though everyone now is recovering more or less.

I cannot say I expected such enthusiasm to kill an unarmed and surrendered opponent from either Kellach or K'lyhia, though. This was very alarming.

And, to add another worry to my pile, L'yhta seems even more depressed than usual now. This really does concern me greatly, and I hope to soon speak about it with her.

Eventually, after she left in an upset hurry the other night though, Ana, Tera and I all sat in a bath for a while, with Ana having to leave for a bit at one point. Tera and I opened up to each other more about our pasts than before, but past is past. We are not who we were back then anymore, and we will press on.

I still hate the torture scars, even if the others don't. But the hate doesn't burn as strong anymore, the mental pain seems to be getting easier to manage.

I don't know if I can ever say how much Tera has done for me, just by being there, by listening and letting me lean on her.

The nightmares don't come as frequently anymore either.

- 杏子 -

[sakata-no-anzu]

Journal Entry, 16s, 3UM

First Entry in the Book of Shadows

The Shadows Move.

Their sight seems all-encompassing, their reach ever growing. Their beasts steal aether and as a mage, I am a helpless gnat to them, yet they want my head for what I and the Addict did to one of their number some two years hence.

The Shadows Move.

So I will move with them.

My wounds from the excursion into the Colossus have healed. I resume practicing with a greatsword. While the Sword is still being mended by the Archmage, my hands find another blade to practice with. I still practice with the false blade, but that only goes so far, and so now I take a real one on an excursion with me.

The Shadows Move.

And I will make ready.