#levi fanfic

[yoongikapi]

sneaky touches || levi || drabble

fluff

aot masterlist

❥ while training with him he pushes you to your max, but is there to catch/steady you when you fall; gripping your arm or hands around your waist it doesn’t matter, he will catch you

❥ during meetings he’ll hand you maps and important paperwork, fingers brushing yours as he does so. he notices how you blush so he makes it a point to do it every time. if he’s sitting next to you he relaxes to the point where his leg rests against yours. he notices how you don’t pull away which makes his heart leap

❥ scoffs while telling you your shirt’s collar is worn wrong, then leaning in and fixing it for you. his fingertips touch your neck and once they reach your collarbone? he secretly can’t believe you’re letting him do this and he realizes he doesn’t ever want to pull away

❥ he catches you asleep in the mess hall and he cant help but brush a strand of hair away from your face. he knows you cant stay out here, so he gently picks you up and takes you to your room. he takes his time walking down the hall, wanting to keep you in his arms as long as he can <3

[erens-heart]

levi ackerman 𑄽ᧉྀི

summary: you share your first kiss with the captain.

cw: canon universe, fem!bodied reader, sad reader comforting a sad levi, mentions of war and death, sloppy kissing turns into an angry makeout session, hair pulling, etc, mdni <3

levi ackerman had an apparent disregard for what everybody thought of him; he broke the rules. he had the mettle to make decisions others couldn’t - wouldn’t dare - that’s what made him the perfect captain. he was distant, some would say harsh, and didn’t care to waste his breath spouting nosense about hope.

it wasn’t necessary, he thought, you would all end up dying on him anyway.

despite this, during the little time levi had to himself, he would devise strategies to ensure that you came back alive from each reconnaissance. he would beg erwin to reconsider the formation, so that you could ride next to him on the next mission, where he could keep you safe, although your chances of making it back unscathed were not minimal.

“i don’t give a shit, just make sure she’s next to me. she isn’t as strong as the others.”

he’d bluffed, knowing that you were next in line for his throne, you were nearly as strong as him. to no avail, levi tried to convince himself that was your only value to the survey corps.

you had taught levi more than a few things about softness, and of how to be patient. in the strictest of confidence, he swore an oath to protect you, and would conquer however many titans necessary to fulfil it.

“captain?” you knocked on his door, politely interrupting his concentration.

“what?” he answered curtly, the weight of yesterday’s failed expedition still resting on his shoulders. he glanced up from an empty tea cup, blinking away his exhaustion, “it’s you. i see. what do you need?”

your intentions weren’t obvious, you were off-duty and had no official business in levi’s quarters. he guessed that you needed him for something else. you hesitated, realising that you hadn’t rehearsed any of this before knocking on levi’s door. he frowned at you in exchange.

“i came to see if you were okay?” you said shyly.

“what?” he practically snorted and got up, turning his body away from you so that you wouldn’t see the surprise on his face.

you’d learned to pity your captain. his short body always looked so sore, new scars would appear on his hands, and go unnoticed. you’d once offered to attend to a cut on his knuckles but he’d told you to, quote, “fuck off and mind your own business.”

however, this wasn’t pity that you felt, this was unchartered territory. you were visiting him out of hours, you were worried. you’d been outside the walls, fought titans, and made it back alive, but insinuating that you cared about levi felt, somewhat, scarier.

levi, your captain, of all people.

you took a step deeper into his room, swallowing thickly. you’d always guessed it would be peaceful in his quarters; his room was clean and organised, and he had a candle burning at his bed side. it’s soft light flickered across your face.

“captain. i think you should take a break-“ you paused, treading carefully around the subject of work, “come for a walk with me?”

“what?” he deadpanned, looking up at you in a vain attempt to read you.

you were smiling, but you smiled at everyone, he certainly wasn’t an exception. you were being kind to him but, again, you were kind to everyone, even the assholes.

secondly, he couldn’t deduce what gave you the sudden courage to knock on his door and invite him on a walk - in the middle of the night.

“captain?” you prompted with a keen sparkle in your eyes, unsure what to make of his response, or lack thereof.

“did you have somewhere in mind?” he sighed, finally giving in and putting his cup down.

“somewhere hidden. can be our secret.” you joked, catching him off-guard again.

levi clenched his jaw, painfully aware of the implications should he get caught alone with you. he wouldn’t lose his job, no, it’d be worse than that - he would be teased for the rest of his life!

“sure.” he eventually agreed after pretending to think about it. he took a cloak from his hanger for warmth and, beneath that, he wore a shirt and tight slacks to hide the bruises he’d earned in battle.

he brushed past you, leading the way out, his small shadow dancing on the walls. you could tell that he wasn’t relaxed, he couldn’t relax, and held a permanently stiff posture. could you blame him? all that death on his shoulders, all those lives on the line.

having pulled your hood up to stay hidden, your smile drooped and you looked down at your feet as you followed behind him, wondering what you could possibly say. what could possibly make things better? or change the fate of humanity?

“so. you invited me out for a walk, and now the cat’s got your tongue?” levi asked, breaking the heavy silence.

you dragged your hand mindlessly along the cobblestone walls, and hummed. “there’s isn’t much to say, honestly. just thought it’d do you some good to get out.”

levi chuckled ungenuinely - it was honestly ironic.

“i go outside all the time.” he spoke as he glared at the tunnel ahead. “it’s just unfortunate i have to spend all of that time butchering titans.”

you frowned with him, hugging your cloak to your body you as you emerged from the tunnel onto the training grounds.

it was completely dark outside, save for the two sconces either side of the doorway you were stood in, and the stars twinkling down at you from the heavens. you watched levi’s cold breath make clouds as he exhaled, scanning the field.

“you can relax.” you mumbled, watching him scour the trees for signs of life. it was like he’d developed a reflex for hunting titans, it was instinctual now. he felt the constant prickle of anxiety, you felt it too.

you were so transfixed on levi’s scowl and the determination in his expression, that you had little time to appreciate what beauty was left in your world: the frost, the birds, the wind.

you tugged on levi’s cape, stealing his attention. his hard expression softened.

“sorry. been hard to relax lately.” he admitted, kicking the gravel with his boot.

“you’re the strongest man i know, levi.” your voice cracked,

“i don’t mean physically. i don’t understand how you get up every morning and face the world, and those titans. if- if i were you- i would have given up years ago.” you began messily, clutching your fist against your racing heart.

levi sighed, and cradled your face with his strong hands, furrowing his eyebrows as he peered into you. his hands were freezing, it was a surprise to you that they weren’t numb.

“shut up.” he scolded gently, and looked down at your glistening lips. “i would have given up too, if not for you.”

he brought you closer, snaking one of his thick arms around your waist. levi didn’t care anymore. without a second thought, he surrendered, he couldn’t bear not having you for a second longer, he was but sand in the hourglass of time.

he used his other hand to guide your chin forwards. he pressed his lips softly to yours and your heart stopped, but you pecked him back.

he kissed you so gently, carefully cherishing the taste of you, as if it were his last night on earth.

you kissed him back, holding onto his collar, whilst he made guttural sounds that lit a fire within you. you could feel all of his rough scars tickling your skin as you moaned weakly into his mouth.

crazed, he grabbed your hair from underneath your hood, pulling you into his taut body, so hard that you crashed into him. your hood fell down, revealling tears that would have otherwise gone unnoticed. he wouldn’t dare, but levi felt like crying too.

you kissed his open mouth, licking his tongue sloppily, letting him lick yours too. the way he kissed you gave you butterflies, it was more than what you’d ever imagined. your heart ached, your body tingled, your feelings felt uncontainable.

you smiled at him, sticking your tongue out for him to taste. levi groaned darkly and licked it, again and again, before grabbing a fistful of the hair on the back of your head. he tied his fingers into your hair and gripped it hard before smashing his mouth back into yours again.

you felt so alive you were sure you were going to die.

you pulled back for air after a while. levi looked at you with starving eyes, and followed you backwards into the wall. you parted your legs to make room for his knee, which he pushed up into the space between your legs. he caged your head between his two hands on the wall, gritting his teeth against your ear,

“captain…” you croaked.

“don’t you die on me. ever.” he grunted, pressing his forehead tiredly to the side of your head, breathing raggedly.

“i won’t.”

[jeankirsteinsgrlfrnd]

✧.* levi ackerman wedding headcanons ✧.*

- a simple, classic black tux with a white boutonniere 

- doesn’t cry during first look or vows, but cries silently during the first dance :’)

- is drinking either champagne or wine

- doesn’t want to get too drunk but you know he’s feeling it a little bit because his cheeks have gone pink for the rest of the evening

- hange is so the best man and gives the most embarrassing speech

- left you a necklace in your dressing room before the ceremony

- let’s you do all the talking and socializing while he sits back and watches

- ofc he feeds you the first bite of the wedding cake

- hates his picture taken but subtly insists on having a bunch taken tonight

- reminds you to drink water through out the night. you still get hungover but not as terrible as it could have been

- if it were up to levi the wedding would have only consisted of you, him & the pastor but he knew inviting friends/family would make you happy

- happy when it’s over and has you all to himself

[bcdwhcre]

“Paranoia,” Levi x Reader

Ship: Levi x Reader

Summary: the paranoia of not knowing where or what happened to Levi.

Warnings: spoilers if you haven’t seen or read the recent season

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Levi had promised to be back at a specific time, he promised you to not worry about what he had planned for Zeke. He told you to stay put where you were and to stick with the others.

You huffed out a breath as you watched him walk out into the distance before fully disappearing, your mind going off to different places and worrying about whether this would be the last time you’ll see him again.

You tried to get rid of the thought, knowing how capable he was of taking care of himself and always coming back home to you but there was always that lingering thought inside of your head waiting to pop and ruin the rest of your days as you wait for him to return.

You stayed with Armin and Mikasa, the importance of sticking together was evident against what was currently happening here which was the rumbling and the yeagerist.

But as days started to pass and you haven’t seen or heard any sign of Levi, you heart began to pound inside of your chest repeatedly the more time has gone by but you stayed put and followed through with the mission of escaping with everyone out of the walls and away from the brainwashed citizens.

As you sat in the back of the cart, Annie across from you, you finally released the breath you were holding in during the whole escape plan. She looked at you confused but with understanding how you can get, she’s known since joining the scouts and working with you.

You remained quiet as they talked with each other the ride out while your eyes were glued to the sky, the ache in your heart only growing more as you wondered what he could be doing at this very moment.

You didn’t know things went wrong with Zeke, you didn’t know he risked to blow himself up to kill Levi and you didn’t know just how injured he was. You knew nothing and that’s what worried you, every mission he went on worried you to death until you saw his face.

“We’ll be running into Hange soon.” Armin spoke up, causing a sigh to escape your lips and your eyes remained on the sky with your hands rested on your chest.

You didn’t know the amount of damage that was going to come in a few minutes and you didn’t know just how bad things were going to get from here on out. You thought you had seen ugly but the closer you got, the more ugly things were going to get.

As the group gotten closer to where they were supposed to meet up, the giant cart Titan hovering over the scene with the others. You were exhausted from everything that had been going on, you haven’t even gotten a chance to eat, to sleep, to shower and it was slowly eating away at you.

“Is that the captain?” One of them spoke, making your head snap up even after being stuck in your thoughts.

Your eyes scattered around looking at the group that was ahead and finally your eyes settled to a body laid out with bandages wrapped around, covering most of his face and body.

Your breath hitched, almost tripping to get to your feet and jump off the cart once they came to a full stop. Hange eyes met with yours before your feet started rushing towards where he laid fast asleep.

“Y/N,” Hange started but you didn’t pay any attention until you were in front of him, staring at his face in horror.

Your shaky hands had reached out, not knowing what to do, where to touch without causing him pain even though he was well knocked out cold. A shaky breath released from your trembling lips, trying to hold your emotions in and trying to pull yourself together.

Finally your hand softly brushed his hair back, half of his face covered in bandages while the one exposed eye remained shut.

“What happened?” You simply said, your eyes moving down to his arm covered him and the blanket pulled over his limp body.

“Zeke blown himself up next to Levi, luckily I found him still alive but it was pretty bad.” Hange sadly spoke, the guilt in her tone from not being able to help him sooner.

“How bad.”

“Y/N..” She trailed off, even she didn’t know how bad it really was, only the parts shown when she wrapped him up.

“Missing fingers, pretty sure his eye is lost and… we won’t know the serious impact it caused him until he wakes up.” She murmured, not wanting to look you in the eye, the guilt washing over her.

“Oh god, Levi.” You barely said over a whisper, the tears slowly leaking from your eyes and down your cheeks. Your heart aching inside of your chest like it was about to explode out of your skin.

Hours had passed, everyone was now camped out in a safe area inside the woods, the fire sizzling and cracking, the tents around spread out. Mostly everyone was asleep or far from the campfire talking amongst themselves.

But you stayed in the tent, looking down at Levi and his current state, paranoid about the fact that he may or may not wake up.

So, you laid down beside him, enough distance to not cause any harm or pain. Your eyes were growing heavy and you felt the drag of slumber overcoming your body.

Suddenly there was a stir beside you, a grunt leaving Levi’s throat as the pain shot through him like lightning. He felt paralyzed, in pain, and out of it.

The movement had forced you to be wide awake, your eyes shooting open and glancing over at the body beside you. You could see Levi squirming and then his one eyes had opened up, shut, then opened slowly again to look around at his surroundings.

Then his eye landed on you.

“Levi?” You asked, the worry and fear overwhelming your body once again. The fear of him forgetting who you are lingered over you.

“Fuck.” He mumbled, the pain shooting through his body, making him realize just how fucked up this situation was.

He could feel the bandages wrapped around his body, he could feel his body ache and as he looked down just a bit, he could see that he was missing a few of his fingers.

“I’m going to kill him.” Levi spoke again, muttering under his breath as the rage of Zeke overcame his mindset, the reality settling in.

“We’ll get him just.. please rest.” You whisper, your fingertips gently brushing through his dirty and matted up hair.

“I was so worried.” You admitted under a whisper, the fear of losing him was choking you, making you slowly suffocate as your eyes watered.

He noticed this, his body growing soft as his eye stared into yours. Slowly, he raised one of his hands up to brush along your cheek, being extremely gentle while doing so because he couldn’t handle the pain.

“I’m here, it’s okay.”

“I could have lost you, Levi. What were you thinking?” Your heart weighed heavy in your chest, his started to weigh down on him too as he saw the pain written across your face.

“I’m sorry.” Was all he could really say, what else was there to say? He didnt mean for this to happen, all he wanted was Zeke to suffer.

“Just don’t scare me like that again.” You sighed, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to his forehead, his bruised face giving you a small smile.

“I promise.”

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A/N: IM BACK!!!

My first imagine back and I am also accepting REQUESTSSSS!!!

I cleared out my request box completely and want to start out fresh and new.

Please send me whatever. Maybe some more Armin requests or Eren? I would like to fill out their lists :)

• Main Masterlist •

• AOT Masterlist •

[wing-ed-thing]

Tandem (Levi x Reader)

Synopsis: The two of you work together seamlessly. Your clear intimacy was usually left unspoken... that is, until Eren asks the stupid question.

Word Count: 2.8k

Tags/Warnings: Language, Fluff, No Reader Pronouns

Notes: I think it’s funny that my last Levi fic was about Levi and reader like... hating each other hahaha. I guess I simply must bring balance

“Do you have the—”

“Right here.”

Watching the two of you in action was fascinating. 

Levi tossed you a canister from over his shoulder. The metal container flipped through the air, nearly smacking Eren directly in the face. He ducked just in time. The canister landed perfectly into your outstretched hand. You didn’t even look up from the crate of supplies you were tending to. Eren sputtered.

“Hey, watch it! You almost hit me!” 

“Don’t be in the way.” You spoke the command in unison. Neither you nor Levi missed a beat. Eren caught a mutual eye roll as you and Levi continued to organize the new cargo shipment. 

You secured a thick wooden lid onto your crate and made a tick on your clipboard. You maneuvered out of the way just in time for Levi to heave over an equally massive wooden box. He stacked it on top of yours.  

“Tell me that’s all of it,” Levi grumbled, placing a familiar touch on your shoulder as he peered over your amassment of papers. You flipped the pages with a solemn shake of your head. 

“Between what we brought back from the expedition and the disaster that was this last shipment, I’d say we’re done with barely half.”

“Fucking hell…” 

Immediately after expeditions, your leftover supplies would be checked and consolidated into storage to prepare for the next outing and regular patrols. That had always been an undertaking and typically took the whole night. But when you were away, a new shipment of supplies had come early. A disorganized mess of various crates and trunks, Commander Erwin nearly hit the roof before he stormed over to the supplier’s office to complain. 

The company had apparently shifted management, and the new owner thought he could cut corners. At least, that’s what you guessed. 

Levi slowly turned to Eren as you made a few frustrated scribbles in your notes. The crease in his brow deepened, and a vein above his eye twitched. 

“What are you doing just standing around, Jaeger?” Levi stepped forward, gesturing to the chaos of stacked and scattered materials across the room. “You think these big-ass boxes will grow legs and walk to storage by themselves?”

“Section Commander Zacharius sent us in here to help. He’s finishing up outside.” A bead of sweat formed on Eren’s temple. Levi stared wordlessly, scowling. “Sir!”

“You can help Jean,” you said, glancing up from your attempt at an organization sheet. You gestured over to where Jean knelt by a mountain of wooden crates. Heavy pouches and metal parts poured out of the sprawling containers. “He’ll need all the help he can get separating the flour sacks from the deconstructed ODM gear.”

Jean met Eren’s eye, exhausted and annoyed at the prospect of working with Eren on top of his menial task. Mikasa carried three boxes stacked on top of each other somewhere in the background. 

The entire regiment worked into the night. Empty crates were slapped with proper labels, refilled with the correct material, and sent to storage. The rate at which you and Levi put together a plan was astounding, and you quickly ordered your exhausted soldiers around in teams to get the job done. 

Jean and Eren worked to separate the flour sacks from the gear, moving gingerly to avoid crushing anything. Some bags were broken. Eren blew white particles off of a grip and onto Jean’s slacks. Jean scowled but was too tired to complain. The two of them took to sorting out the pieces of gear quietly, Jean placing the parts in their respective bins as Eren sifted through the mess of metal and wires. He was left with a small box of screws at the end of his work.

“Um, do we have a box for screws?”

“Screws?” Jean repeated, glancing over the closed crates. “No?”

Eren shrugged and put them in his pocket. 

You and Levi continued to work seamlessly together, racing throughout the room and ensuring everything was sorted. You passed your clipboard back and forth as you elapsed each other. Eren could hardly see the handoff. He chased after you after he closed the last crate of flour. 

“Section Commander!” you turned with a stack of random materials in your arms. The soldiers from your squads gathered around you, deliberating with each other over the orientation of the storage. “Jean and I finished. Where else can I be of assistance?” You handed your supplies to one of your team leaders, giving instructions before returning to Eren. 

“Captain Levi has the list,” you said, moving another set of boxes down to the floor. Your team took to opening them. You looked down and groaned at the sight, running a hand over your face. Inside, the supplier had packaged together explosives and yeast. “What a mess.”

Eren ran off to find Levi, who stood in the courtyard supervising the organization of horse feed. Levi gave two firm slaps to a neat assembly of boxes as he addressed a group of six. The compilation had been mislabeled as “bread grains.”

“You’ll take these to the stables. You hear me? The stables. If I see a lick of this shit in the kitchen, you’ll eat horse food for the rest of your life.” Eren approached him cautiously, offering him a salute.

“Sir! How can I be of assistance?” Levi huffed, blowing a tuff of his bangs away from his forehead. 

“I just gave the list back. Go ask the Section Commander.”

“Uh…” Eren croaked, having just spoken to you. “Well, I just spoke to—”

“Eren!” Armin appeared in the doorway out to the courtyard with a wave. The torchlight made his blond hair shine even more golden. “We need your help with the swords!” 

“There you go,” Levi snorted, gesturing down the hall where Armin disappeared. He bumped Eren’s shoulder as he passed.

Luckily, things were beginning to wrap up by the time Eren nearly dropped from exhaustion. After the swords came lentils mixed with the smoke-gun pellets and then the tangled ODM wires. You and Levi were powering on at the same pace you had been for the night— perhaps even more rigorously— but Eren could see the burnout on your faces. A rule of thumb whispered among the cadets dictated that the two of you appeared visibly grumpier with tiredness, not that anyone would dare tell you that. 

Levi maneuvered around you, snatching something you offered wordlessly in your hand. He sent off the last of the cargo boxes with a small team of drained recruits, and as he turned to you, he didn’t have to say a thing before you tossed the clipboard to him. He caught it like a frisbee. 

“That’ll do it,” you announced. Your voice echoed off the stone walls of the now-empty room. “Thank you, everyone, for your hard work. I’m sure you’re very tired. Dismissed!” 

Eren breathed a sigh of relief as you marched out of the room. He quickly took his leave, filing out with the rest of his friends as they trudged back to the barracks in exhaustion. No one said a word as they crossed through the courtyard, too drained from the expedition and the organization disaster to say anything. 

Eren stuck his hand in his pocket, stopping short when he felt the small box of screws he had put in there earlier. Armin shot him a worried look as he started back toward the packaging room, too fatigued to ask where he was going. Eren said nothing, jogging back so he could return as quickly as possible. 

You and Levi sat on the stone floor, back to back, as he read over the materials list. Your head tilted back to rest on his shoulder. He did the same, his short hairs brushing against your cheek. Two cups of tea sat on the floor next to you. That must be where you went when you dismissed everyone.

“The twenty units of ODM wire—”

“Southwestern storage with the grips,” you yawned. You closed your eyes, letting yourself slouch back into Levi. He said nothing as you nuzzled into the shoulder of his jacket.

“Updated uniforms and linens—”

“Forth floor. They need to be organized, but they can be distributed soon.”

“Great. Like we haven’t had enough of that tonight.”

Eren stood frozen in the entryway. He clutched the box of screws in his hand, stepping off to the side to avoid being seen. Something inside told him that he shouldn’t be there, that the scene in front of him was too intimate for his prying eyes. He watched on anyways, wondering if he should just wait until tomorrow. 

You finished your tea, placing it on the ground with a disappointed hum. You reached for Levi’s and took it in the pads of your fingers. Levi brushed his cheek against your hair and tilted his face to look at you. He didn’t get very far with your head in the way.

“Excuse you,” he frowned. “You have your own.”

“Finished mine,” you muttered, half asleep. Levi shook his head before returning to read the rest of the list. He flipped a page. 

At that display, Eren decided that he could definitely wait until the next day. Stealthily, he returned to the little, lit hallway to take his leave. 

That was until the little box of screws clattered to the floor. The sound reverberated off the stone, causing both you and Levi to turn to the noise. You sat up straight with eyes snapped open with alertness. Eren cringed, picking up the box, and with no choice, he revealed himself. 

“The hell are you doing up?” Levi snapped with a deep scowl. “You were just dismissed. Or do you want more work?” Eren almost flinched.

“I forgot about this.” He held up the forgotten cargo, giving it a rattle. You yawned again, a strangled noise of affirmation escaping you.

“Oh, thank you, Jaeger. You can leave that with me.” Eren scampered across the room to your outstretched hand. It dropped with the weight of the tiny container. With a simple thanks, you once again sent him on his way. 

***

“Do you think the Section Commanders are, you know, together?” Eren asked in a hushed tone at the dinner table the next day. Armin’s forehead wrinkled in thought.

“Which ones?”

“Yours and Captain Levi.” Eren played absentmindedly with the leftover stew on his plate. The entire table seemed to stiffen. A few nervous eyes glanced around the mess hall for any leadership within the radius to overhear. Eren hardly noticed the way the former members of the 104th seemed to lean forward.

“I think they’re all together,” Reiner finally spoke, eyes darting around the room again.

“What? You mean like all at once?” Bertholdt laughed nervously, swiveling his head as he spoke. He rubbed at the back of his neck with his large palm.

“Yeah!” Reiner exclaimed in a hushed tone. The table leaned closer. He gestured emphatically with his hands. “I mean, you’re in this line of work. Everyone’s ripped and sexy—”

Connie let out a roaring cackle.

“You did not just refer to Captain Levi as ripped and sexy!” 

Reiner sputtered as cheeky grins and bouts of laughter spread across the group. Reiner clutched the edge of the table as his pale skin turned a bright shade of red.

“You know that’s not what I meant!” he stammered, just about standing up to slam his hand on the table, causing various utensils to clatter. The noise was not too out of the ordinary for the cafeteria. “That’s not what I meant! I meant my squad leader!” Connie propped an elbow on the table, counting his fingers to accent his words. 

“Section Commander Levi: ripped and sexy. Section Commander Miche: ripped and sexy. Section Commander Hange—” Reiner slapped Connie’s hand from across the table, causing Connie to just about go into hysterics. He collapsed into Sasha’s shoulder. Bertholdt tugged the back of Reiner’s shirt, urging him to sit back down. 

“That is the opposite of what I meant!”

“You said everyone, Reiner!” Connie had nearly burst into tears. He heaved between labored breaths. “What— what if they…! What if they made— Hahaha! A calendar?! What if they made one of those sexy calendars?!” His deranged delirium was contagious, the taboo notion enough to make Mikasa cover her face with a shake of her head. She continued small bites of her food. 

“Shirtless Levi calendar just for you, Reiner.” He stood at a loss as Jean reached up to knock against his bicep. Reiner sat down in defeat, hands rubbing over his face as Bertholdt gave him a heavy-handed pat. 

“What made you ask, Eren?” Christa’s gentle voice somehow made it down to the other side of the table. He craned to be able to see her before looking off, wondering if he should say anything. He didn’t think for long, if at all.

“I walked in on them last night—” An eruption of astonished gasps and cries cut him off—a jumbled chorus of sounds molded over each other. 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute!”

Sasha’s voice carried over everyone else’s. 

“Levi and Reiner?!” She exclaimed. Reiner somehow grew redder. 

“Of course not!”

“No, he means our captain and Levi, right Eren?” Armin clarified, and Eren nodded. 

“When you say walked in on them—” Jean glanced around the room, eyes widening with emphasis. “Did you mean walked in on?”

“No, no,” Eren stuttered, running a hand through his scalp as he thought of describing what he saw. “I’d say they were more cuddling.”

“Cuddling,” Reiner repeated with a single downward nod. He crossed his arms over his chest as he squared his shoulders back. “You walked in on the squad leaders… cuddling.”

“Well, they weren’t really cuddling. They were sitting back-to-back against each other more… nuzzling. And sharing a cup of tea.” Eren trailed off, face contorted in a pained expression as he continued to play with his hair. Armin nudged him under the table, barely picking up his head to offer him the contrite look painted on his expression. 

“Eren…”

“I think it’s kinda romantic!” Christa brushed a few hairs behind her ear. “Two soldiers fighting for their lives with no one to lean on but each other! I could see them together. Maybe Captain Levi would loosen up a bit if he was dating.” Ymir grumbled something incoherent. 

“I think we’ve all been in a room where Captain Levi’s shared a cup of tea with all the leadership.” Reiner glanced around the table, unimpressed. “Is that supposed to be a euphemism or something?”

“It was the same cup!”

“Things sure are lively over here.” Everyone froze. “What are we talking about?”

You placed a warm hand on his shoulder. Eren’s eyes followed the length of your sleeve to your smiling face. You glanced over the group, slightly taken aback at the sudden silence. Levi came up to Eren’s left with crossed arms. 

“We heard from everyone coming the other way that you couldn’t shut up, and now you decide to be quiet?” Connie met Reiner’s eye from across the table.

“The calendar,” he mouthed, and Reiner resisted the urge to throw a spoon at him. 

“We were just talking about Sasha’s dating life!” Eren exclaimed, much to Sasha’s horror. You beamed.

“Oh, how fun!” Levi rolled his eyes, maneuvering around you. 

“I’m grabbing food. You want the usual?” He leaned in slightly, a gentle touch on your back. The table watched with bated breath. You smiled and nodded.

“Yes, please!” With your confirmation, he left. You turned back to the table, your hand still on the back of Eren’s chair. “Dating! That’s so exciting! You have to tell me!” The group exchanged looks. Normally, they would tell you. That is if there was anything to tell. 

“Are you dating, Section Commander?” Sasha quirked an eyebrow, hoping to turn the heat onto someone else. 

“Oh, uh—” You stuttered, thrown off at the sudden question. You could feel the heat of their intense stares. —“No, not really.” You let out a nervous laugh. Surely you were missing something. You missed the silent eye contact Eren made with Armin.

“Not really?” Eren repeated, twisting his mug in his hands as he stared at his water. Reiner studied him, wondering that perhaps Eren had been onto something after all. Mikasa kicked Eren under the table. He flinched, composing himself just before Levi returned with your food. 

“You guys are sure acting strange tonight.” Bertholdt refused to look you in the eye. You let out another nervous chuckle before taking your plate from Levi with thanks. 

“They ran out of the rolls, but I got you the—”

“The baguette?” Your face lit up at the sight of the tiny baguette on the corner of your plate. You faced Levi with a grin. “Have I ever told you that you were the best?” 

“Sure, sure.” He didn’t acknowledge the rest of the 104th as he stormed toward the exit. You offered them a wave goodbye.

“Sorry, we can’t stick around. I’ll see you all later! Good luck, Sasha!” With one last wave, you hurried after Levi and left together. 

As soon as you were well down the hallway, the table erupted in debate.

Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed, and supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

Notes: Ah, I love writing young Eren as the stupid little baby he is 🙏 Heavily channeling Bluey “do you have a wife?”

[oh-exos]

burden

pairing : levi ackerman × reader

genre : angst, fluff

warnings : depressive episode

you don't want to get out of bed and he knows the script all too well.

you stare at the ceiling. as threatening were the tears, you knew this wasn't the time. nor the place.

he'd be here the next moment, calling you out for breakfast. you dreaded his arrival. how were you to excuse another of this day? how were you to expect him to excuse another of this day?

how long till you become a burden?

the door creaked open. well, half open. enough for his voice to demand you out of the bed and onto the table.

but he didn't get the mumble of wanting five more minutes, or he didn't receive the usual groan. instead you were silent, you were awake and silent. he traces back to see you curled up into your blanket. you were laying slightly tilted, your head buried into his pillow. with silent steps he walks over to his side of the bed.

‘what's wrong?’

you don't reply. what were you to say? that even after being in the comfort of his presence for years, you still trace back to those memories that you, you both have tried so hard to bury? because in all fairness it was never that serious. people had it worse.

and you were scared to watch levi validate your feelings. you called them stupid. but never did you see him undermine them even if the memory was as stupid as not being selected in a competition back in your college. because if it affected you then it shaped you. and if it affected you, then it deserved attention.

and it scared you, because how long till you become a burden?

you hear him sigh as he retreats his steps and steps out of the room. you didn't stop the tears from dampening your cheeks. you couldn't.

was he done with you? was he tired of putting up? was he-

‘get your face out of my pillow,’ you pop out to see him put the tray of breakfast on the side table. he grunts and sits on the bed, taking away the pillow from you. ‘come here,’ he shifts so that your head lay on his lap. he sighs and starts to scratch your scalp gently as you settle on his lap. and you let yourself cry.

he doesn't question why. he rests his head back on the headboard, continuing the scratching of his fingers in your head. once you get quite he looks down at you, face still away from him.

‘i brought our breakfast here. you don't have to get up yet. you can have it whenever you feel so. and if you don't feel like moving a muscle i'll...feed you,’

a faint smile curves up your face.

‘brat,’ he scoffs.

you shift your face to look up at him. there's nothing except love that you might spot in his eyes.

‘do you not get tired?’ you knew the answer and so did he. yet this conversation played like a routine.

‘no. i'm here for you because i want to be here for you,’

‘you don't have to-’

‘i want to’

and you don't question him again. not for the day atleast.

⠀⠀

⠀

[mayajadewrites]

Levi Ackerman x Reader - Almost

Modern AU Levi Ackerman x Reader fanfic I've been dying to write! Levi is my latest hyper fixation so this was bound to happen. There will be other AOT characters in the mix, but remember this is a modern AU!

Summary: Reader works at a coffee shop that Levi frequents every day for his black tea. For 6 months, they've talked every day inside of the coffee shop, sharing laughs and smiles.

It's time to take it outside of the cafe.

Bratty barista is what your favorite regular, Levi calls you. You met Levi during your 2nd week working at the coffee shop - his order was a breath of fresh air for you.

"Medium black tea, please."

Every day since then, Levi has come in and ordered his tea. It's been 6 months and every day you feel the same butterflies when you see his steel colored eyes looking into yours as he enters the cafe.

Your feelings for Levi are not new, however you refuse to act on your feelings since his feelings are locked behind a gate. That's okay though, you're fine being alone and casually dating.

You're a 25 year old with a degree in business and a dream of opening your own coffee shop one day. You live alone in a cozy one bedroom apartment, you have a job you really like, and your dreams. What else could a person ask for?

You've never hung out with Levi outside of the cafe since you're too chicken to ask him for his number. So every day you work you pray that he comes in.

And he always does.

"Hey." Levi called your name, wearing a gray suit that went well with his eyes. "My usual, please. How are you?" Levi's voice was monotone, but you could tell how he was feeling that day anyways. Today's mood: Just okay.

"I'm okay, leaving for the day soon. I got the 5AM shift today." You looked at your watch, reading 8:35. Your shift is short today, only 4 hours (thank God) and you had plans to cuddle up in bed and read a book.

"I've actually been thinking," Levi cleared his throat. "Would you want to hang out? Outside of work, obviously." Levi's eyes were half lidded, looking up into yours.

"Obviously."

"Brat." Levi sipped his tea after your coworker handed it to him. It was like temperature did not affect him. "Obviously yes, or obviously after work?"

"Don't both of those mean yes?" You raise your eyebrow, smirking. "Obviously after work, and yes." In your mind, you knew the yes was the most obvious answer. "So, yes. When were you thinking?"

"Well since you just told me you're off for the rest of the day, how about... today?" Levi raised his eyebrow, moving to the side.

"Don't you have work?"

"After work. Obviously."

"Yeah, sure." You try to play it off like you haven't been dreaming of this moment for months. You're pretty good at keeping a poker face, especially around Levi. Most of the time you don't need one because you both have a genuine connection and get along well together, but in times like these where you don't want to seem like you're in love with him, the poker face comes on.

"Here's my number. I know it's on a business card so ignore that, I don't want to hear your mouth about it."

LEVI ACKERMAN: CEO OF ACKERMAN INC. 222-222-2222.

CEO? Of Ackerman Inc? One of the biggest names in the city?

How did you not know this about Levi? Granted, his picture isn't plastered everywhere, he's more of a quiet, stealthy CEO. But still. He acts the opposite of what you would except from someone who's... well, rich as hell and has all the connections in the world.

"Thank you, Levi Ackerman." You emphasize his name, smiling. "I'll text you soon. I need a nap after this shift." You yawn, waving goodbye.

Levi raised his cup to say goodbye, the corner of his mouth turning up to a slight smile.

Earning a smile from Levi was almost like winning the lottery.

Almost.

[moo-blogging]

Just thinking about how Levi would lose it if you bought a bear onesie for your toddler and he wakes up one day to find a tiny grizzy bear going through the soft toys basket, he will want to have 6 more of those.

The weather was turning chilly due to the monsoon season. It had been raining for days now and you feared your little one might get sick. You browsed thought the net and bought that cute bear onesie you saw months ago. It was too hot then, but now was perfect.

2 days later, on a rainy Saturday morning, you woke up early to feed your toddler. You then dressed him up in the brown bear onesie before letting him roamed around the house as you prepare breakfast. You were grinning as you watched a little bear playing on the floor around his toys.

When breakfast was almost ready, you sent your little bear to wake up dada. He waddled into your bedroom, screaming Dada as he went. But it went silent. You knew he was attracted to the basket of soft toy by the window.

Levi heard the happy shriek of dada and he had woken up. Groaning as he felt the emptiness by his side, he knew you had made breakfast. Opening one eye, he saw a blurry brown figure pulling toys out of the basket. Blinking a few times, he was convinced he saw brown cub ears and a tail.

He lifted his head to see clearer. And he finally saw his little toddler in a bear onesie. He smiled to himself. He called to him, and the little bear turned around, squealed and ran into Levi's arms. Levi carried the little bear onto the bed, inhaling the soft sweet scent of baby powder.

Dada!

Morning, little bear.

Bear!

Levi touched his bear ears, yes, bear. Mama made breakfast?

Nodding, the bear said, pancakes!

Giggling, Levi told the bear Mama only knows how to make pancakes. Go to Mama, Dada's coming. Levi released the little bear and watched as his little feet unstably carrying himself outside, screaming Mama!

Levi now wished he had 6 little bears around the house waking him up.

[alleviate-ao3]

i'm so sorry the chapter is taking too long! it's just pure sex i swear

in the meantime, here's another sneak peek:

minors dni!! crude; rough sex

You rolled your hips unconsciously, urging him further inside, needing him to move. He thrust once, twice – slow movements until you could adjust to his size. Then he picked up his pace, moving from hesitant to feverish, ramming inside of you so hard and deep it filled you to the hilt.  

“Oh god yes.”

Tears prickled your eyes as he swelled inside of you. He was holding you now, his body heavily resting on your side, still fully clothed, one of his hands holding the back of your head, his fingers tight around your hair, while his other held onto your breast, squeezing. His head rested against your temple as you both looked down at where he ruthlessly fucked you, his hips slamming forward, his balls slapping the skin of your ass, the fabric of his trousers straining against his thighs.

“Hah yes, yes!” You couldn’t stop the choking, high pitched sounds that escaped your throat, forced to stay still as Levi gripped you tightly.

He tilted his head so that his lips flattened against your ear. “Like that?” He breathed, rendering you into nothing but a mere puddle of heat.

[yoongikapi]

first kisses || levi || drabble

fluff

aot masterlist

when he kisses first

❥ he wraps his hands around your waist, a slight blush on his cheeks but regardless his lips land on yours

❥ its probably something short, but when he pulls away his hands stay resting at your hips and you notice the blush has reached his ears

❥ “was it alright?” he looks away and tries to contain his blush. you smile; cupping his cheek you respond, “kiss me again”

when you kiss first

❥ you wrap your arms around his neck, keeping him in place while you place kisses on his cheek, then jaw, then finally his lips

❥ they’re softer than you imagined and are pleased when he kisses you back

❥ you pull away and his lips follow yours, when you smile at this you peer up at his face;

❥ “are you blushing?”

[jelliezellie]

"Oh My God. They Were Roommates." - Levi

A/N: Ask and you shall receive the sequel to “And They Were Roommates?!” Honestly, I loved this request so much but it was in the comments to the original post.

Part One: "And They Were Roommates?!"

Your eyes slowly opened and light shone into them, stinging a little. You groaned in response, pulling your arm over your face. Your head throbbed in pain and your stomach ached. Damn Hange and Erwin. I’m never drinking with them again. 

You took a breath and the scent of bacon and waffles nearly lifted you in the air like a cartoon character. Footsteps approached you as the bacon sizzled. “Morning.” A deep and groggy voice, still full of sleep and filled with a concerned undertone spoke. 

You opened one of your eyes. “Levi,” you mumbled as your hands covered your face. “Water.”

The seriousness died down a little and his eyes gleamed with a teasing light. “You weren’t lying last night, were you?” He murmured, patting your head. “You really wanna say my name the first thing in the morning?”

You hummed in confusion. Then, the events of last night slowly came back to you.

-

“Levi. Levi. Levi. I want to say your name. And I want you to say mine…”

“What?”

“Every day. Like, when we… wake up. I want my first words every day to be ‘Good morning, Levi.’ Y’know?” You mumbled, closing your eyes. “I wanna… own your first words every day. And I wanna give you mine…” You shuddered. “I don’t want you to move out.”

He swallowed, unsure of what to say. “Y/n, you’re drunk.”

“Maybe a drink was what I needed… Maybe I needed to get drunk… Maybe I…” You stared at him, smiling like an idiot. “Maybe I want to kiss a clock—I mean, maybe I want to kiss your name—you. You.” -

-

You groaned in pain and embarrassment and Levi ruffled your hair. “It’s alright, Y/n. You’re cute when you get drunk. Which, by the way, is not happening again. No more drinking contests.”

“What if you try to move out again?” You replied, looking up at him. 

“If I try to move out, then don’t get drunk before you try to kiss me. You know that’s against my morals, right?” He muttered, walking back to the kitchen. He took the bacon off of the stove and shoveled some onto a plate. “Breakfast?”

“Yeah…” You mumbled, sitting up. As much as it hurt, oh, what a sight to see… Levi stood in front of the stove, his eyes narrowed and adorned with the familiar bags under his eyes as he put the last of the bacon on a plate. He only wore a sweatshirt and sweatpants—not the most suggestive thing to wear, but the way the sweatshirt lifted ever so slightly to reveal his hips and waist when he stretched made you swoon. 

You stood, stumbling over to him as you rubbed your head in pain. He noticed and quickly steadied you by your waist. His eyes softened and he looked at you as if you were the most delicate and intricate piece of art he had ever seen. “You okay?”

“My head hurts.”

“Mine does, too. Do you remember half of the things you said last night? ‘Levi, you’re a clock. Levi, Levi, Levi…’” He mocked lightheartedly.

You rolled your eyes and shoved him playfully. “Whatever. I just didn’t want you to move out.”

“Clearly.” He handed you a plate with bacon and waffles, then grabbed a cup. “So, do you want to talk about what you said last night or do I need to threaten to move out again?”

Your smile faded. “What is there to talk about?” You already told him that you loved him; what else was there to say? It wouldn’t do you any good to tell him how beautiful he looked, even (especially) with messy morning hair. How he was cooking you breakfast after you annoyed him last night. How, when he grabbed you by your waist, your heart practically pounded out of your chest.

Yet, he looked at you with a soft smile, because he was wondering if he could make your day brighter by telling you that he liked making breakfast for you. That he didn’t just ‘accidentally’ make too much breakfast in the morning and leave a note that said, “I made too much for me to eat. The rest is yours.” 

Levi wondered if you would want to hear him say that he did care about you; that he felt the same. That he remembered the way you like your drink in the morning and the way you tear off all the tags on your new clothes even though he told you, numerous times, to use scissors. He liked the way you dragged him along to every party with Hange and Erwin, despite his protests. He liked the way your idiotic metaphors, especially your drunk ones. 

He liked you. He cared about you. 

So, before anything else, he asked, “Did you mean what you said last night?”

You didn’t hesitate to say, “Every word. At least, every word I remember.”

He took a breath and admired you, trying to take a mental image of how amazing you looked, even if your face was a bit puffy from sleep and your eyes were baggy, he still found you so captivating. Levi leaned in and your eyes widened as you realized what was happening. His hand cupped your cheek and your arms wrapped around him as your eyes fluttered closed.

Your lips pressed against his. It was short and sweet; his lips were soft and it seemed as if he was waiting to do this forever as his other arm snaked around your waist and pulled you closer. Neither of you could stifle the smiles that tugged on your lips as you parted. 

“Go brush your teeth,” he teased but his hand remained on your cheek and his arm, on your waist.

“You first.”

Taglist: @apolloshaiku @meowjaa

[jeankirsteinsgrlfrnd]

boyfriend levi ackerman headcanons

- he will absentmindedly rest a hand on your leg

- asks your opinion on most things, he wants your approval

- has got to stay up til midnight to play wordle

- acts of service is definitely his love language

- will leave out a fresh pair of clothes for you to change into before bed if you’re out late

- will make tea for you and sit with you while watch your favorite show

- leaves a note every time he leaves the house if you’re asleep instead of sending a text

- he can de-escalate a fight between you guys pretty quickly (you rarely fight)

- ^ he has a super calming voice

- he will occasionally read one of his books out loud to you

- he has trouble being affectionate and he loves you especially because you are so patient with him

- for my jean girlies, check out my pinned post for a slow burn fanfiction

[staar5384]

A Death Too Soon

levi x gn!reader- they/them pronouns- hurt no comfort- slightly ooc levi

"You cannot make them go on this death march with you," Levi glared at Erwin. "We cannot lose two elite soldiers to this."

"I understand how you feel, Levi, but if I let you both stay behind you know exactly what the cadets will think."

"Then tell them that they are helping me! Make them go check over the wall, anything!" Levi had never dared disobeyed Erwin's command, but with your life on the line he was willing to throw everything away to keep you alive.

"Levi-"

"Don't act like I'm stupid. You know damn well you could lead the cadets without them."

Erwin sighed. The Commander looked exhausted, and clearly Levi's nagging wasn't helping, "I realize your personal feelings play a role in this, but you need to push those aside. You understand the situation we're in, right?"

Levi clenched his fists, biting back the sharp words that were threatening to pour from his lips, "You know nothing Erwin. Don't act like you do."

"Commander? Levi, what's going on?" You rounded the corner after hearing the slight commotion.

"Nothing. Get back to the-"

"He wants you to kill yourself alongside himself and the recruits."

Your eyes widened, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"The only way to create an opening for Levi is to have us charge straight towards the Beast Titan. I have to lead the charge or else the recruits won't do it. You have to come as well. If I allow you to stay with Levi, they might see it as some sort of favoritism, and they may be less likely to do it."

You just stared at Erwin, stunned. Out of all the stupid ass plans, this is what he came up with? He wanted you to throw your life away for this? On the slim chance that Levi kills the Beast Titan? "I can't do that."

"Come on, be reasonable right now."

"No! Are you hearing yourself! You cannot lose yourself and me in this same damn battle! We have no elites left, and we don't even know if Hange and their squads are alive on the other side of the wall," Your hands were now trembling and your head was spinning. You had grown so far past wanting to die for no reason. "Send me over the wall. I can sneak over without the cadets hearing. They won't even know I'm not there."

"I agree," Levi cut in. "I think that's a better idea."

"Well, it's unfortunate that neither of you get to make this decision. Get your horse ready, soldier. I need to speak to the others," Erwin left the conversation on that note, walking over to the crowd of terrified Scouts.

You lurched over, vomit spewing from your throat and tears falling from your eyes, "Oh my god."

Levi watched as you threw up the contents of your stomach. He could feel his heart pounding in his ears. The realization refused to sink in, Levi refused to believe you were going to die. What were the odds you lived that? They had to be so, so low; and Levi knew how low they truly were.

"Levi," You looked at him, tear streaks staining your face.

"You need to get out of here. I will deal with the consequences as they come, but please go," Levi was panicking now and he reached out to grasp onto your hands. "Don't do this. Do not let that maniac lead you straight to hell," Levi was begging. He had never done that before. How desperate was he to keep you alive?

"You know I can't do that. It would get me executed at the very least, Levi." The unfortunate truth is if you walk away from this, no one will understand why. They would see you as a traitor to humanity.

"I said I would deal with it! I-I can convince them you were more useful alive than a damn corpse in the middle of a field. No one would even know what happened here because they will all be fucking dead!"

You sobbed, resting your head atop Levi's, "I'm so sorry."

Levi teared up, keeping his eyes focused on the ground, "Please, don't do this."

"I wish it didn't have to be like this."

Levi paused, taking a deep breath. Losing Erwin didn't mean shit to him anymore now that he was losing you. "Me too."

"Hey, you two! Get over here!" Erwin shouted to them.

You pulled away from Levi, moving your hand up to his chin. Levi tilted his head to meet your eyes that were red and puffy from crying. You leaned down and kissed Levi, catching the Captain off guard.

Levi was stunned, but kissed you back. Your first and last kiss. When you pulled away, he was crying once more, "Please don't forget about me."

"I won't," Levi's voice cracked as a raging fire burned in his throat. "I promise."

You stepped back and slowly made your way towards the other Scouts, knowing that this was the last time you would ever see Levi Ackerman.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a/n~ might make a short second part to this if people like it enough <3

[wing-ed-thing]

Stupid, Stupid, Emotionally Unavailable Erwin Smith (Levi x Reader x Erwin)

Synopsis: You knew him through his cadet years and yours. You practically grew up together and your admiration of him led you right into the Scouts. You thought your affections had been a well-kept secret. Levi thinks Erwin has known the whole time.

Word Count: 17.5k

Tags/Warnings: No Reader Pronouns, Robbery, Knife-Violence, Violence Against Children, Alcohol, Slight Timeline Divergence, Reader is Good at Math, Angst, Fluff, Hurt and Comfort

Notes: This was so fun to write I never want to do it again!

The door was still open, and bugs were getting into the shop. 

You could see them from around his shoulder. The lantern at the door illuminated the sign that swung above the sidewalk. The sun had set a bit ago, and now, because of the light, bugs were entering through the open door. The steel of his blade reflected the flickering ember. You didn’t like looking at it. It made you upset, but the moths and other winged things entering the store made your guts squirm. 

The stool you had been sitting on had been knocked to the ground by your ankles. You stood behind the counter. The cash register sat on the small space in front of you with just enough room for it and an area for customers to place merchandise to ring up—a hook with bags dangled on the edge.

“Are you deaf? Open the register,” the man repeated forcefully, glancing over his shoulder toward the open door. His eyes flickered around, and he slammed his fist on the counter when you did not respond. You jumped instinctively, your focus only then breaking from the swarm of nocturnal bugs. “I don’t like roughing up kids, but I won’t hesitate if you don’t do what I tell you!”

Before you could even think, you popped open the register. Your heart fluttered in panic as the man came around the counter, pushing you to the side. You fell to the ground as he ransacked the cash from the trays. He pocketed the wad of bills, not before catching sight of the small safe that sat underneath. The thief eyed it greedily, and you could do nothing as he seized you by the sleeve, dragging you up onto your feet. A hand made its way into your hair, tugging and tangling painfully at your skull as you were shoved face-first into the safe’s lock. 

“What’s in this?” He let go of your hair, having difficulty withdrawing his hand as he ripped out a few strands at the root. You crumpled to the floor. “Open it!”

“I can’t!” You looked up at him with round, pleading eyes. “I don’t have the key—” A cold metal line touched firmly against your neck, causing you to swallow the rest of your sentence. A stream of tears trailed down your cheeks. You could hardly feel their warmth over the chills of fear that vibrated your entire being. 

“Go open it!” As a warning, the thief pressed the blade deeper against your skin before letting you go. 

You curled on the floor, mind racing at the prospect of performing an impossible task. Surely, this would be where you would die. You looked toward the front door, a part of you thinking you heard movement, hoping your parents would finally return as they told you they would after their errand. Tears hit the ground below you, soaking into the floor. And as you curled in on yourself, you hoped you would disappear into the wood, too.

A sudden blur flashed in your damp peripheral. The thief stumbled back, his weapon clattering to the floor and disappearing somewhere under the myriad of shelves. A brown-clad arm wrapped around his throat tightly as if holding on for dear mercy. From behind his shoulder came a striking blue color.

“Run!” you heard, staring into bright blue irises, “Get out of here!” Booted feet kicked from behind the man, the glimpse of a sleeve visible to you in the lantern light. You scrambled back with no strength to do as he said. 

A military cadet!

The large man threw his weight backward, slamming the young cadet into the bookshelves behind him. You heard the cadet groan out in pain as books tumbled off the shelves like a waterfall. His grip on the man’s back ultimately gave out as he fell. The thief shook himself off, and just as he turned to cock his fist against the young, blond cadet, an encyclopedia hit the back of his thigh. 

You stood at the opposite end of the counter, hard-cover novel raised in the air, ready to follow up on your weak throw. The look on your face was frozen in petrification as all you could do was cry. But the moment you distracted him was enough because, in the next moment, the thief was slammed down hard against the wood floor. 

And that was how you met Erwin Smith. 

The papers would laude him as a hero, detailing the story of a young military trainee on a late-night run through town, arriving just in time to save a child from a knife-wielding thief. The story would come and go from the papers, although you wouldn’t learn all that until later.

One of Erwin’s friends, who had also stayed late to get in some extra training, had tipped off the Military Police, who arrived shortly after Erwin managed to singlehandedly take down your attacker. Your parents returned within ten minutes of the incident, confused and panicked, as their shop had turned into a crime scene in their short absence. 

You couldn’t help staring as the blond cadet, Erwin, answered questions by the Military Police. He stood straight and looked serious, more composed than you had been. The MPs had scared you so much you could barely speak, not that your talking capabilities were all that functional before their arrival. They quickly moved on to your parents, and the cadet slowly approached you. 

You didn’t know how to stand. He looked so official in his uniform, cadet or not. He held his hands behind his back with an unreadable look on his face, and when he stood in front of you, he held his hand out. His neat bangs were slicked to the one side of his forehead, untouched. 

“Are you alright?” he asked, the neutral expression switching from stoic to cordial. “I am Cadet Erwin Smith.” You became conscious of your stance. His back was straight, and shoulders squared, but even so, you stood just a bit taller. You shook his hand. His grip was more firm than yours. You offered your name. 

“Thank you,” you said in a small voice, watching as the MPs milled around. You and Erwin stood off to the side, just two kids in the middle of something that felt bigger than truly hit home for you. “I don’t know what I would have done.”

“I’m glad I could help.” He nodded. You leaned against the bookshelf behind you, one of the shelves supporting about an inch of your bottom. Erwin continued to stand straight. He offered you a closed-lip smile and a slight shrug. “You helped me as much as I helped you.” 

The two of you continued to watch over the scene, the two of you having been shoved off to one of the book-lined walls, forgotten. You watched in awe, never having seen military officers in action up close. Erwin, however, watched on with a certain knowledge glinting in his eyes that yours didn’t. You glanced from the MPs to Erwin. 

“Did you want to become an MP?” you asked. Erwin hummed.

“No,” he answered curtly, his eyes glued to the officers.

“Oh.” You reached behind you, tracing the spines of the books on the ledge. You pushed a few back into place, the titles having shifted from when you grabbed and threw one. 

“I want to become a scout.” 

You didn’t know what to say, only humming your previous response as your gaze returned to the door. The MPs kept it open as they came and went, and the bugs came and went with them. 

***

He came by the shop the next day. You caught his uniform jacket and crest as he passed by the window, the sight of him like a dream. Erwin seemed to notice you the same time you did, his thick eyebrows shooting up on his forehead as he excused himself from a group of friends to enter your humble bookstore. 

You sat behind the counter on your stool, appearing taller than you looked the day before. Erwin approached you with a mixture of surprise and relief. 

“I’m surprised to see you back so soon.” He stood in front of the register. “I wanted to see how you were doing but assumed you wouldn’t be in for a few days.” The corner of his lip dipped, unsure how you would react to him casually mentioning the traumatic incident from the day before. 

“My parents still need a cashier,” you muttered with a few bobs of your head. 

Erwin bobbed along with you. He meandered to your left, padding as he scoped out the books on the shelves. The word “NONFICTION” was painted in curly letters on a sign posted near the ceiling. He splayed a hand across a series of encyclopedias, just as you had the night before. They didn’t budge, already neatly pressed against the back wall.

“Your strength is admirable. It must be hard being back so soon.”

“You’re the cadet,” you blurted. “You’re the one with the strength. I’m sure you get into fights like that all the time.” Erwin laughed aloud, something about it still proper— at least it was to you. 

“I can’t say I do.” He shook his head before facing you with a mischievous glint in his eye. “That one was my first.” Erwin puffed up his chest, nose proudly in the air as you caught the twelve-year-old in him for the first time. Even so, he practically looked like an adult to you. “And when I’m in the Scouts, I’ll be sure to fight titans and explore all the land outside Wall Maria.”

“Titans?” you cocked your head to the side, not quite knowing much about the military or caring. You had heard the word in school, but your parents preferred not to discuss things as gory as Scouts fighting titans around school-aged children. There were Scouts— you often forgot they existed— and there were titans, which existed separately in your mind. As for the land outside of Wall Maria, it had never even crossed your thoughts. 

Erwin’s eyebrows furrowed. You smiled at the sight, deciding you thought they looked like two caterpillars. He glanced over the shelves.

“Yeah, you must have a book on them somewhere.” 

Not finding what he was looking for at the front, Erwin headed to the back. He looked over the titles quickly, his boots making a solid sound against the wood floor as he descended the row. You followed him, scrambling from your stool to chase after the double-sword crest on his back. 

Erwin found a book near the back of the store. He plucked it off the shelf with a flick of his index finger. The cover consisted of a crudely drawn giant with sharp, gaping teeth. It looked real enough to you. You glanced around the empty store, nervousness causing you to sweat.

“I dunno if my parents would be okay with this.” You cast your gaze off to the side. 

Erwin maneuvered around you, the open book in his hands as he settled into a nearby loveseat. You glanced around again, but you found no one, only Erwin. He stared at you from his book before waving you to sit beside him. 

You sat, hands nervously on your knees. Erwin sat with the slightest slouch as he placed the back cover over your left thigh. You nearly recoiled, swiveling your head around the store to avoid being caught complicit in obtaining inappropriate knowledge. 

“Titans are man-eating giants that live outside Wall Maria,” Erwin explained, pointing to a page in the book. You pouted. You knew at least that. “Preventing us from exploring things we’ve never seen before. All the things living out there.”

“But there’s nothing out there.” You shifted in your seat, bringing your knee up onto the cushion as you crossed your arms. Erwin took the rejected book in his lap with a slight frown. “We live behind the Walls because the rest of humanity was destroyed.” You recited the sentence just as you did in school, not quite knowing what the words meant. You nodded as if it were obvious, blowing a hair out of your face.

Erwin stood, leaving the book about titans on the cushion as he perused the rest of the non-fiction section. You watched him disappear behind the shelf in front of you. 

“Well, why don’t we have any record of the people who came here when the Walls were first built?” His golden hair popped out from the opposite side, another book in his hands. He glanced down, taking a step toward you before stopping. “My dad has a theory… had a theory. That there was more outside.” You didn’t notice his correction. 

He kneeled in front of you, placing another book in your lap. The two pages joined together to show an entire map of the three Walls. Hardly an inch at the edges was dedicated to the territory outside. You had never really bothered with the books at the back of the store—you preferred the medical texts at the front— but you occasionally reread the short fiction your mom read you when you were smaller. As Erwin knelt in front of you in his uniform, you couldn’t help but be reminded of the princes from those pages.

“This can’t be everything,” he said with certainty, but if you didn’t know any better, you would have thought he was pleading. “And right now, all we know about are titans. And we don’t even know much about them at all.” Erwin scrambled back up next to you, opening the titan book again. “These tall ones could eat you in a single bite.” 

His voice was laced with wonder. He hadn’t intended on scaring you, as most boys his age tended to like to do, but his words made you freeze. You studied the page, thinking back to the thief the night before. He had been a large man. There were monsters bigger than him?

“Are they all that tall?” You remained glued to the pages as Erwin flipped through them. He did so quickly, his ability to read a lot faster than yours. 

Erwin raised the open book to your face, again tapping at more crude illustrations. Kicking legs flailed from the mouth of a giant with sharp teeth. You couldn’t stop the slight quiver of your lip. You put on a brave face in the presence of an older kid. Erwin didn’t seem to notice, more caught up in flipping through the book of gruesome images. 

“Some are only 3 meters, but that’s still tall.”

“I’ll grow that tall one day.”

“That’s impossible.”

“I’m still taller than you.” 

Erwin stayed to look through your myriad of books. He even bought one at the end of the night when you closed. And the next day, he stopped by again, plucking books off the shelves to teach you what his father had taught him before putting most of them back where they belonged. Over time, you suspected that Erwin ended up buying all of the texts he used to guide you. At the very least, he learned how to use the cash register after a few weeks. And after a few years, Erwin had become a regular at your holiday dinners. 

You would see him walking from one side of your display window to the other before he entered, sometimes walking with friends. You met Nile Dok once, but given how he never entered your store again, you didn’t think he liked you very much. You spotted him the most, walking by Erwin’s side. And during times when Erwin quickly stopped to say hello to you, Nile waited on the street. 

The closer graduation came, the less Erwin stayed in your shop, but he always made it a point to greet you with a promise to make up any time missed another time. 

Then, one day, Erwin came to the shop in his Scout uniform. While the ensemble was hardly different from his cadet uniform, you had practically screamed once you saw him. You scrambled out from behind the counter, leaping across the storefront to wrap your arms around his neck. 

“You did it! You did it! You did it! You made the selection!” you cried, feeling the rumbling of Erwin’s chuckle reverberate from his chest into yours. He wrapped his arms around you, embracing you. 

“You stop that! You’re going to mess up his uniform!” your mother scolded behind you. Only then did you let go, beaming from ear to ear as you smoothed out the front of Erwin’s jacket. 

“Oh, it’s going to take a lot more than that,” Erwin laughed, addressing your mother formally from over your shoulder.

He stood a good novel’s width taller than you now. You swore a few months back that you would catch up when you hit your teenage years. Erwin smiled proudly, and you were glad for him. Nile Dok stood, cross-armed on the street, as he usually did. A few other teenagers in Scout, Garrison, and MP uniforms milled about in a group.

“Me and a few buddies were headed out to celebrate, and I wanted to invite you.” 

You blinked in surprise, glancing quickly behind yourself at your mother in an unspoken bid for approval. You rubbed your bicep nervously. To your surprise, she nodded. You suspected it was only because of Erwin. 

“You go ahead, just be home at a decent hour.” 

“I’ll make sure of it.” Erwin nodded and guided you out of the store. 

***

The pub was packed. Erwin’s friends had claimed a cluster of tables in the far corner, stealing chairs from the adjacent area to pull up enough seats for all of them. You stuck by Erwin, him being the only person you knew, as you found yourself utterly lost. The rest of the newly recruited soldiers had just turned the legal drinking age of fifteen; meanwhile, you, at age eleven, sat nursing a sad-looking juice that Erwin had ordered for you. They yammered on about the military, using jargon you couldn’t decipher. Even your waitress, a girl named Marie, seemed to know what you didn’t. 

You sat, trying not to look awkward while Erwin and Nile chatted with her. She laughed a lot, and at one point, she even sat down at the table with you all. Both conversations proceeded to prattle on without you, trapped between military talk and more military talk. Marie seemed more than happy to indulge Erwin and Nile in their niche discussion.

“Up, the both of you, let me see them!”

The two boys rose and, with a cheerful—albeit sheepish— reluctance, gave Marie a slow turn. Only then did you realize that Nile Dok wore the green and silver unicorn of the Military Police. They faced each other, Marie cheerfully between them as the rest of the table whooped and hollered at the modeling of their uniforms. Nile glared at Erwin, who didn’t seem to notice. You looked around at Erwin’s comrades nervously, offering a slight clap of your hands before the two boys finally sat down. 

“I see you brought a friend this time, Erwin.” Your head snapped up, distracted and looking elsewhere when Marie spoke. She offered you a warm smile, her face round and kind. “I’m Marie, it’s good to meet you.” You mirrored her, telling her your name in return. 

“From that bookstore, you like a few blocks away,” Erwin chimed. Marie lit up in recognition. 

“Oh, I love that place. My father always used to take me to pick out books.” She nodded profusely, letting her cheek settle into one of her palms. The other held a round, empty drink tray close to her chest. “I think the amount of times he’s had to read Beauty and the Beast to me has shaved a few years off his life.” She laughed, and the notes she let out were beautiful.

“Really? I might have seen you. I usually run the register,” you said hopefully, without recollection of seeing Marie before. “Small world.” Marie took a sip of ale from Erwin’s cup.

“And you’re so close—” She flinched at the flavor, and Erwin chuckled. —“You should really come by more often. I’ll have a drink waiting for you on the house. Neighbor’s discount.” Erwin cut you off before you could speak.

“Not of age, Marie, don’t do that,” he warned playfully, taking a swig of his drink. You saw Marie’s face contort in confusion. 

“Oh,” she sounded, cocking her head to the side. She studied your face, leaning forward as she squinted at you. “I wouldn’t have known.” Marie cocked her head to the opposite side. “You can’t be too far off.”

“I’m eleven,” you surrendered, feeling small in a group of teenagers, “I’ll be twelve by next season.” You and Erwin only had a three-year age difference, but the gap between his birthday and yours during this season made it appear a year greater. 

“That’ll be just in time for recruitment. Are you planning on joining up with the military, too? If you’re around this one, I can only imagine he’s told you all about it.” She nudged Erwin hard, and he groaned.

“Really, Marie?” 

But, in fact, Erwin hadn’t told you about recruitment. Not that you had been thinking about joining the military in the first place. You remembered he spoke about it more when he was a newly recruited cadet. But as the years passed, you realized you hadn’t noticed his talk about the military— and his father’s theory— had dwindled. 

“I think you know more about it than I do,” you opted, thoughts swimming. You glanced around the table. “Are you also a cadet?” 

“Oh, no, no, no,” she giggled, waving her hands profusely. “Trust me, if you’ve seen me run, you’d know not to put me in any branch!” You were late to the collective laugh that overtook her, Nile, and Erwin. 

“Uh…” You looked down at your sad juice, fingers tracing the rim. “I might apply.” 

Erwin quirked a brow. 

“Really?” he questioned, “I didn’t know you were interested.”

“I was thinking about it.”

And just like that, the conversation became about the military again. A few trainees from your right chimed in about recruitment, mulling over their days as cadets and other pieces of terminology that you still didn’t understand. 

Marie, to her credit, kept attempting to pull you back into the conversation, changing the topic every so often to include you. But just as the chatter had gotten away from you, it got away from her, too. 

She was beautiful and seemed kind, and you understood why Erwin seemed so taken with her.

***

Time passed slowly for you but apparently did not for Erwin. After checking the clock for the umpteenth time, you discretely rose from your chair. You left a coin by your half-empty cup for the pathetic juice. You tried to interject in the discourse for just a moment, but as you expected, you were utterly tuned out. You bid a polite farewell. Erwin didn’t notice. Marie caught your eye as you took two steps away from the table, wordlessly asking if you were alright, and with an equally silent affirmation, she turned back to the group. 

You made it home. You tried to busy yourself with tasks around your room before you found yourself back in the downstairs bookshop. You always thought seeing it locked from the inside was funny, that something about the closed door transformed the space in a way you couldn’t describe. 

The street grew darker on the other side of the glass. The name of your family’s shop displayed itself backward to you, but the letters were correctly cast in the shadow of the setting sun. It would be completely dark by the end of the hour.

You lingered at the back of the store, standing in the second half of the non-fiction section. One by one, you pulled books. Titans. Architectural analysis of the Walls. Cartography. You remembered reading copies of them with Erwin as he explained things to you. 

You sat with them in the dark, pages splayed over open spines as you tried to decipher them. You tore through line by line, flipping as frequently as Erwin had, trying to understand his infatuation with the mysteries between the lines because you were certain that Marie understood in a way you didn’t.

You held the book about titans on your lap, staring into the crudely drawn illustrations as you had with Erwin three years prior. You remembered what Erwin told you. You could probably have recited what he taught word for word, yet you still wouldn’t have understood.

A shadow cast itself across the floor. You recoiled back into the darkness behind the bookshelves. The figure outside pressed itself against the glass, looking in. Despite the elongated form, you recognized a familiar silhouette of hair. 

You peeked out from your hiding place. Erwin was pressed up against the front glass of your shop, hands cupped around his eyes. You retreated, holding your back against the shelf behind you as you pondered your subsequent actions. For once, you weren’t excited to see Erwin Smith at your door. 

He knocked. You waited a few moments, breathing slowly and hoping he would leave. He knocked some more. 

It was only when you heard him sit down on the pavement that you went to collect him. Erwin perked up at the sound of the latch unlocking, quickly scrambling to his feet as you opened the front door of the bookstore. He looked surprised.

“I was worried about you,” he said quickly. “I didn’t know where you went. You didn’t say anything.” Your heart palpitated, seeing him in his new uniform still a dream to you. And better yet, he had remembered you after all and cared enough to come find you. 

You stood in the shop doorway, holding the door against the front of your shoulder. Erwin remained close to you, almost as if waiting to be let in.

“I did,” you assured him. “Marie said goodbye to me on my way out.” Kinda. He glanced between your face and the positioning of the door with a slight frown. “Thank you for inviting me. I’m glad you finally got to join up. Sorry for the misunderstanding. Goodnight.” 

“Wait—” You moved to close the door, but Erwin quickly gripped the width of it. You didn’t fight him for it. He pursed his lip. “I’m sorry.”

Mixed emotions swirled around in your chest. An urge to tear up tugged at your sinuses, and you didn’t know where it came from. 

“Nothing to be sorry about, Erwin.”

It had turned to night. The street where Erwin stood had been overtaken with dim lantern light, and the moon overhead was full. A few clouds passed over his head, floating fast across an otherwise clear sky. 

“We could’ve talked about something else.”

Even in the darkness, his eyes shone with the reflection of the moonlight. The blues of his irises glinted with an acute solemness. They flickered up, and as you followed them, you found a small hoard of winged bugs buzzing around the top of the doorframe. Wiry bodies smacked against the wood and the ceiling, not knowing the difference between outside and indoors. 

“I guess I’ll have to become a cadet.” You met his eye, and he held the same surprised expression from the pub. Surprised and impressed. It was an attention that you liked. “So I can understand what you’re talking about next time.” So that you’ll take me seriously. The corner of his lip twitched.

“That’s a poor reason.” 

“Well—” Your gaze flickered from the Wings of Freedom crest on his left breast pocket. —“What about all the things outside the Walls?” The solemnity in his eye had sparked into a blaze instantly, yet the rest of his features surrendered nothing. “You told me about them a while ago. You think you’re the only one who wants to see them?”

You recited it perfectly. You would have believed you, too.

“You know,” you continued, glancing back toward the back of the shop and the stairwell leading to your upstairs apartment. “They’d be thrilled if you stopped in. If you’re up for it, that is.” 

Erwin didn’t say a word as he pushed the door with a warm smile. You moved to the side to let him in, locking the shop back up behind you.

***

He tried to talk you out of it more than once. 

Erwin liked to ask, “Are you sure?”

And you would always answer, “Never been more sure in my life,” before distracting him with something else to get him to drop the topic. But for all your huffing and puffing, you couldn’t say you disliked the attention. Whenever you brought up your intentions for recruitment, Erwin always fell for your bait. 

You spent three years in the Cadet Corps, just as Erwin had. You donned the same uniform you had grown used to him wearing. The warm smile Erwin had shone when you first showed him had you riding a high for the following two weeks. 

You wrote to him often. Erwin was, after all, a full-time Scout now, and you were busier than ever— training monumentally more taxing than keeping the register at a bookshop, to a lack of your surprise. He offered instructions on how to best perform in ODM gear, how to coil your wires so they don’t tangle, the places to keep stupid clean for inspections… 

You kept them in your gear, papers folded to display certain sections of his notes as you practiced morning to night on your skills. The writing grew worn, and the stationery wrinkled from times that rain fell while you were out and then dried again when you found yourself at a fireplace. 

He told you about expeditions and when he departed. You had a theory that sometimes he forgot he was writing to you at all. You owned pages of Erwin dumping his thoughts onto paper, long ramblings about nothing and everything all at once. You spent your nights trying to understand because there was undoubtedly something more profound than his words. And after a thorough session of overanalysis, you drafted your responses in perfect synchronization with his, line by line. 

His last letter came in before he was sent off on another monthly expedition. Erwin had addressed it, “My Dearest.” You admired how he wrote your name in the following space, observing where the pen lines were thickest and thinnest. 

“By the time you receive this letter, you will have already made your branch selection. Congratulations. I wish I were there to celebrate with you as you did with me…” the letter read. The collection of pen strokes shot through your heart. You let the note drop onto your dorm vanity as you vibrated with glee. You caught sight of your reflection in the mirror and then the Wings of Freedom crest on your breast pocket— just like Erwin’s.

You drew your own stationery, ready to reply to his letter, line by line, as you always had. This time, you intended to give it to him in person. 

***

The gates opened at an odd time in the evening. Which, given the nature of the Scouts, certainly couldn’t have meant anything good. You waited with bated breath at the headquarters in Trost, watching as your fellow Scouts trudged up the hill. You kept out of the way to avoid being put to work by a supervisor who’d perceived you as loitering. After scanning half of the crowd from your upstairs perch at a hallway window, you finally caught sight of a familiar blond. 

You made a break for the stairwell, sliding down the winding railing at the behest of a few passing officers, and dismounted into the courtyard with a start. Meandering horses and soldiers passed you, your singular standing presence parting the group like a lodged stick in river water. 

You instantly spotted him, a wave of relief passing over you that he had returned. The feeling faltered as you saw the gauze wrapped around his forehead and left arm. It didn’t take long for Erwin to spot you in return. His brows raised with joyful surprise before settling into something much more sentimental. You offered him a salute, the first in your new Scout uniform. He saluted you back, the reins of his horse in his hand. 

“You really did it,” he said, riding up before you. He gestured with his head. “Walk with me to the stables. I want to hear all about it.” You obliged.

And so continued a long history of following Erwin Smith. 

***

On the other hand, Levi Ackerman didn’t seem to like you very much. Granted, he didn’t seem to like anyone much outside his two friends. You didn’t blame him, given the way that Erwin had strongarmed the three of them into the military. 

“You’re the one who serves the tea,” Levi said as more of a definite statement than anything else. He stared down at you from a step up, his two friends sitting together in the barracks behind him. The scorn in his voice almost made you take another step down, and his thin brows twitched slightly in confusion. He glanced back at his friends, who both shrugged simultaneously. 

“I’m a team leader under Section Commander Erwin?” you clarified, which made Levi scowl deeper for some odd reason. You repeated your name, but Levi didn’t appear to be paying much attention. A buzzing sounded from the lamp hanging just outside Levi’s door. A long-legged insect fluttered around the light. Levi stepped outside, closing the door behind him. 

“I always see you serving tea.” Your skin burned with embarrassment. You fidgeted, lightly folding the papers in your hands. Did new recruits really think you were just there to serve drinks?

“I wanted to give you these,” you glossed over the implication, offering Levi the stack of small papers in your hands. He looked at them skeptically but ultimately took them from you. Levi flipped through them briskly, bored gaze passing over carefully hand-written notes and detailed diagrams. They looked old. “I had help when I first became a Scout. And training is tomorrow, and I know the three of you were kinda singled out, so…” You didn’t know where you were going with that. 

“Thanks.” Levi continued to stare you down. 

“Well, that’s all. I hope they can help.” You made your way down the steps of the barracks hastily. Levi watched your back as you retreated into the darkness. 

***

“I guess you didn’t need those notes after all.” Given that this wasn’t your squad, Levi was surprised to turn around and see you. You stared past him and up into the trees of the training forest. After your delivery to Section Commanders Hanji and Flagon, they quickly returned to headquarters. 

“Hurry up, Newbie.” Flagon had called to Levi, but you had insisted that he could return with you instead.

“Your matters are urgent, Section Commander. Let me take something off your plate.” And with one last pout, he obliged you.

“They were helpful enough,” Levi said, polishing his gear. If anything good came from his current situation, it came in the form of standard-issue cleaning and maintenance products. “You keep thorough notes for an errand-runner.” You laughed, although Levi couldn’t tell if it was sarcastic.

“Expedition Command is no joke, and besides, it let me catch the tail end of your practice.” You sat down next to him. Before the Scouts claimed this section of the forest for training purposes, someone had placed a picnic table out by the tree line. You sat with Levi on the bench, heaving a deep sigh. “Unless you’re complaining about getting time away from Flagon, which, in that case, I can take you back now.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

You leaned back against the table, enjoying the view over Trost and Wall Rose, glancing at Levi, who was now tending to his grips. The sun had begun to float back down to the horizon, although you still had a few hours before it completely set. Peak heat was starting to dissipate, and the light cast a myriad of pastel colors across the thin mass of swirling clouds overhead. You reached into your boot and, retrieving a folded paper and a pen, turned on the bench to study Levi’s reverse grip. 

He glanced up from his polishing, double-taking your rigorous notes. You had already drawn a diagram of how Levi held his swords. 

“Can I help you?”

You glanced up at him and back down at your notes. A few equations littered the margins. The numbers were small. A few of them were crossed out. Complex diagrams depicting vectors and force lined the bottom. 

“Your reverse grip might be revolutionary. I heard Hanji say so. No one’s ever done it before.” Your face lit up much more subtly than Hanji’s did. Hanji had practically passed out on the spot. “Standard techniques might damage your wrists long-term.” You turned to him with a light smile. “Maybe we can troubleshoot it sometime.”

Levi set his gear down, resting his current fixation on his lap. He observed every inch of your face, suspiciously taking in every fold, pore, and curve. Perhaps Erwin knew of his plan for assassination and sent you to do recon. But something about you gave him the slightest doubt of his suspicion.

“Why are you doing this?” he asked, the scowl on his lips no more severe than usual. You would learn quickly that it happened to be the face Levi always made. You cast your attention back toward your notes, calculations, and diagrams, shrugging.

“When you join the military, a lot of talk can go over your head. Things can be a little cliquey that way, unfortunately.” You held out the page to him. “It’s rough because it’s based on my estimations, but this might help.” Levi’s nose wrinkled, and he made no effort to take the note.

“I don’t want your boot paper.”

“Not a fan of footnotes?” Levi didn’t laugh. You stifled the goofy smile that fought to overtake your lips. Terrible puns aside, Levi had never seen that expression while you were pouring tea. You put the scribbling into your breast pocket. 

“I’m not a fan of gross, sweaty paper from someone’s boot.” 

“Fair enough.” You stood, stretching as you continued to stare out towards Trost. You pivoted to face Levi, who had just finished wrapping up the rest of his gear. “Are you ready to head back?”

You mounted your horses, and Levi had to admit that riding back to headquarters with you likely marked his most pleasant experience since joining up with the Scouts. No supervisors were around to talk down to him. No one was screaming. It was just the two of you traveling through wildflowers and tall grass.

Levi stared at the back of your head as you naturally took the lead. You sure had a lot of faith that he wouldn’t slit your throat and ride off, Levi thought. He rode up next to you, his unfamiliar horse jerking to the side. 

“You gunning for some job in the rookie— whatever— school or something?” Levi leaned forward to meet your eye. The question left you puzzled.

“The Cadet Corps? No.” Your mouth puckered in thought. Levi veered ahead, your horses slowing down as you traveled carefully down a decline. He scoffed.

“With your thorough lesson plans. What’s even the point of being here?” he jeered.

“Most of that was actually Erwin’s.” Levi perked up at the mention of his target’s name. “We used to exchange letters when I was a cadet. He helped me get through the academy, so I compiled everything into more organized notes. And, well, I expanded some.” He hummed, saying nothing as you entered Trost. 

A few people waved to you. You waved back with a smile. Levi continued to follow you down the busy streets.

“You keep showing those titans who’s boss, Lieutenant!”

“I certainly will, Mr. Flynn. Say hello to Mary for me!”

The farther Levi rode with you, the clearer it became that you knew just about everyone. Even the stable boys regarded you casually, taking your horse in immediately as you made small talk. Levi had several questions about you, but none of them would distract him from his mission. 

***

That was until the expedition happened. 

Levi made himself scarce during the following days, and with no one close to him, no one sought him out to bother him. 

“Maybe I should stop by.” You stared out the window of Erwin’s office. He hardly looked up from his paperwork, humming to himself as his distracted brain worked to register your comment. 

“Hm? Why’s that?” You stared off in the direction of the barracks. Given your position, pulling Levi's schedule wouldn’t be too difficult. Your eyes focused on your reflection in the glass, and as Erwin sighed and turned to face you, you met his reflection. “Feeling sentimental for my assassin?” You scoffed, turning around. Your knees bent, allowing you to lean on the low windowsill. 

“You’re still here, aren’t you?” 

Erwin swiveled his head with a playful roll of his eyes. His mouth remained in a stoic line. 

“You’re heartless.” 

“You? Calling me heartless? That’s funny when you’re straight merciless. Assassin or not…” With a jump of his brows, Erwin turned back around to his paperwork. —“Oh, and thanks for letting me in on that, by the way.” You glanced back outside the window with a slight pout. “Someone’s ordered a hit out on you, and you don’t even bother to tell me.”

“I’ll be sure to let you know next time.”

“Erwin.”

“Hm?” 

You had lost his attention again, probably for the better, given that Commander Shadis wanted the paperwork under Erwin’s hands on his desk as soon as possible. You meandered across Erwin’s office, plucking open a side cabinet to reveal all the fixings for a cup of tea. He perked up at the very sound. 

Erwin waited for you to start preparing it.

“Would you make me one?” He craned his neck, hoping to catch today’s selection— as if it wasn’t Erwin’s very own tea collection. You didn’t look at him.

“No.” 

Erwin’s face fell with an acute shake at your outright refusal.

“Why not?” 

You turned with reluctance, the tea already in your hands, ready for brewing. A vein twitched in your forehead.

“Because new recruits think my only job is to bring you tea.” You didn’t miss the little smirk that glitched onto Erwin’s lips. Another bob of his eyebrows. His pen flew across the pages. 

“Oh really? And who told you that?” He glanced up at you, another tease at the tip of his tongue. He would only talk this way with you. “Would it be a breach of power if I ordered you to bring me one?” The annoyed tensing of your shoulders filled Erwin with amusement. 

“I’m sure Commander Shadis would love to know that you’re abusing your power over your team leaders.” You walked over to Erwin’s desk, and sure enough, you held a second cup of tea. He graciously took it in his hands with a polite nod.

“This is why you’re in my squad.” You held onto the handle.

“Hopefully, not the only reason.” After a beat, you relinquished the cup to him. Erwin thanked you. You sat on the front of his desk, the both of you taking a sip of your drinks simultaneously. 

“Oh, I’ll be seeing Marie at the month's end.” You nearly choked. That was a name you hadn’t heard in a while. You didn’t think Erwin had seen Marie again since the beginning of his time in the Scouts. If he did, it wasn’t information you wanted to know. “She sent me a letter recently. She says she has big news that she wants to share with me.”

“Will Nile be there?” you asked, trying to make sense of the situation. Erwin shook his head. 

“Not as far as I know.” You hummed into your tea, not wanting to sound too invested.

“You haven’t seen Marie in quite some time. I’m sure seeing her again will be very nice.”

“I think so, too.”

When you finished your drink, Erwin was filling out the last page. He held his teacup in one hand and penned his signature on the last of the paperwork with the other. You gathered it all in one big stack, and with relief, you retreated from Erwin’s office.

***

A pounding came at your door later that evening. Its force made you dart onto your feet, and as it sounded again, you scrambled for a weapon to answer the door with. Opening the door to your unknown visitor turned out to be rather anticlimactic. Levi pushed directly past you, making a beeline for your kitchen. 

“Uh, hello…?” You stood at the door in a set of comfortable civilian clothes and a sizable combat knife in your hand. It was late, after all, to be having unexpected visitors. He only stopped raiding your cabinets for a moment to scold you.

“Shut the door; you’ll let in the bugs.” Not knowing what else to do, you complied with his request. Levi stood in your kitchen, a canister in his palm. He turned back to you with his usual deep frown. “Really?” He held the canister up and shook it before raiding your cabinets some more. “The Scout’s resident tea servant, and you don’t even have anything of quality.”

You gaped at the sight in front of you. Unlike most officers, you didn’t live in standard issue housing within headquarters. Rather, the Scouts owned a few apartments in the surrounding buildings. You happened to get placed in one of those through sheer bureaucratic bullshit, but you certainly weren’t complaining about not having to live in a glorified dorm fifty steps away from where you worked. 

Still, you huffed at Levi’s audacity, storming forward to slam your hand against the counter extended in front of you.

“Didn’t you grow up in the sewer or something?” you shot back, earning another glare from Levi.

“Yeah, so it’s a goddamn testament when I say this shit is shit.” Nonetheless, he continued to brew the tea. If you were honest with yourself, you were a bit sick of tea for the day. Levi crossed his arms, his bangs falling in his face. “Do you still have that page from your shoe?” You stood, blinking for a moment.

“The… footnote…?” you wondered with a genuine seriousness. Levi rolled his eyes as he grumbled to himself. 

“Whatever. Whatever you want to call it. Do you still have it?” He slammed one of your cups in front of you, and by some miracle, the tea didn’t spill over the sides. Levi took a sip from his, physically recoiling as the liquid touched his tongue. He slapped a hand over his mouth. 

“Yeah…?” You still didn’t follow. Levi dumped his drink down your sink. 

“Get it for me.” From seemingly out of nowhere, he tugged out your notes. Levi slammed them down on the counter, letting the pages splay out. “I want to work on that reverse grip.”

***

Sitting with Levi at your kitchen table as he read over your notes, something about it felt familiar. A single light dangled overhead. Your two plates had been pushed off to the side, the pastries from the market being the only thing Levi seemed to approve of in your apartment. Your tea had about an inch left in the cup. Levi had settled on a blend you didn’t know you had, grumbling something about it being shit but less shit than your shitty tea. 

He sat at your kitchen table for hours, following silently along as you walked him through your notes. He wanted to know everything, what every term meant, every figure and diagram. You explained it all as you relived your old notes with older eyes.

In a way, you couldn’t help but be reminded of Erwin and the way he used to teach you. 

“I don’t understand the difference here.” Levi slouched over a comparison of two diagrams. “They look the same to me.” 

“The difference is that instead of your first knuckle bearing all the force, it would be evenly distributed across your finger. You can bend your fingers the way you have been, but you risk breaking them.” You pulled up another page, layering the two so that the pictures lay one on the other. “And this rotating motion will allow the remaining force of your strike to be absorbed throughout your entire arm once you hit something solid instead of breaking your fingers or shoulder.”

Levi nodded silently along, eyes darting elsewhere as he thought to himself. He mirrored the motion in the air.

“Doesn’t that feel more natural?” Levi hummed, and you didn’t think twice about taking hold of him to guide him in the motion he had been using in his swordsmanship. “As opposed to this. You can feel it right here, can’t you?” You patted the underside of his bicep. 

“Yeah, I can.” You stared into his eyes, the sudden realization coming over you.

“Oh, sorry.” You recoiled your hands from him. He returned to studying the papers.

“It’s no problem…” he trailed off. You watched as he pondered to himself, and you subtly checked the clock. The time he had been there wasn’t much of an issue to you; you were just surprised you had talked for so long. No wonder you were all out of ideas for him. You were about to tell Levi just that when he spoke again, “You are wasted in your position.” Your head snapped toward him, wondering if you heard him right.

“What?” 

Levi didn’t hesitate to repeat himself.

“You’re wasted as a glorified errand dog,” he asserted. “I don’t know much about the ranks and shit around here, but I know for damn sure you deserve section commander or higher.” 

You were stunned and silent. Levi sighed, taking it upon himself to start clearing up the dishware from the table. You shook your head.

“I don’t—”

“You know, I don’t really care if you don’t agree.” Levi moved past you, rolling his sleeves to work on the dishes. “And I’m not going to try to convince you either way.” 

Levi’s departure from your apartment was uneventful. After he finished putting away your dishes, you handed him the newly-thickened compilation of notes, and he was out the door. His words about your wasted potential kept you up that night until you overthought yourself to sleep.

***

Once an assassin sent to kill your closest and dearest friend from childhood, you now thought of Levi Ackerman as more similar to a housecat than anything else. He showed up at your doorstep once. You had given him terrible tea and a decent pastry once, and that had turned into a terrible habit of him showing up to your apartment unannounced at least a few times a week. 

“It didn’t feel right,” he muttered the next time he stormed through your door. A few of your notes were fanned out in his hands, wrinkled from how he held them in his punishing grip. He wore his full ODM gear on top of his civilian clothes, with filled sword sheaths and all. You just about screamed when he drew a blade. Levi remained focused on the notes. “You said the new technique was supposed to relieve tension, but I’m still getting aches in my knuckles and my shoulder.” You continued to watch his sword.

“Is my apartment really the best place for your ODM training?” 

“It’s not like I’m tearing up the place; even if I did, the Scouts would pay for the repairs.”

“Out of my paycheck,” you muttered.

“Better yours than mine. Show me the technique again.” Levi sighed, shoulders dropping in annoyance as he finally lowered the page. He gritted his teeth, tilting his head back in exasperation. Yeah, Flagon was right. Levi really did look like a thug. A moment passed until he deflated, blowing out hot air as he fought his signature scowl. In your opinion, he wasn’t doing a very good job. “...please?”

You sighed, setting aside whatever task you were doing.

“Look, I’m not a trainer. It’s just theory and a mishmash of stuff I know, which can only take you so far.” You crossed your arms, gesturing at him with a shrug of your shoulder. Levi blinked at you, unbothered. “Okay, show me what you’ve been doing.”

That extra set of ODM gear sat compiled in the corner of your already small living room, which Levi had brought a few nights back to practice his basic motions with. You didn’t ask where it came from.

(He had even hidden an extra set of clothes at your place, although it was likely that he had told you where he was stashing them, and you weren’t paying attention or forgot. Both were likely.)

You stood again at Erwin’s tea station, holding an unopened container in your palm. Given the times it had been passed over, you safely decided that Erwin didn’t like the blend. You held it up in the air.

“I’m taking this,” you proclaimed.

“Go right ahead.” Erwin shifted in your peripheral. “Late nights?” He took a comb to his hair, squinting at his reflection in the window. You reckoned he looked pretty goofy from outside, given anyone was watching the windows.

“I guess you could say that. I was told that my tea sucks.” Erwin chuckled, smoothing his bangs out over his forehead one last time. 

“Well, I’m honored you’ve decided to raid my stash to turn the tides.” He came around his desk as you closed the cabinets. You pocketed the tea, and Erwin came to stand tall and straight in front of you. He puffed out his chest, his newly laundered dress uniform looking crisply ironed. “How do I look?” 

You adjusted his collar. You never did make good on your proclamation to grow three meters tall, and now Erwin stood in front of you with a decent advantage in height. Not that it mattered now as adults well into their twenties, but it struck you how much time had passed.

“You look as handsome as always. I think Marie’ll just…” You took an inhale, putting on the best smile you could. “Marie will just be so happy to see you.” You picked up the mixed bouquet from his desk and handed it to him. “Good luck. I hope you get home safe.”

“And you—” Erwin glanced back up from the tea stashed in your pocket to your face, a coy look about him. —“I take it you have evening plans as well?” 

“Hardly,” you laughed bitterly, picturing Levi’s frowning face. Erwin leaned back on the front of his desk, carefully holding the bouquet for Marie by the bound stems. And as he sat, simply staring at you, your smile faltered as you dared to think his expression resembled something sentimental.

Erwin had changed; as much as you liked to think he looked the same as he always did growing up. To you, he did look the same. You saw him just about every day for the past ten years, and the small details of his face had escaped you. He used to have full cheeks, you realized. Now, his face looked far more defined. You wondered when he developed such angular cheekbones.

“You like your bad tea.”

“Wait, you think it’s bad too?” 

“I’m just saying to not get too invested in a guy who criticizes your tea, that’s all.” Erwin shifted his shoulders, pulling on the front of his collar before smoothing it out again. You scoffed.

“Believe me, I wouldn’t consider myself ‘invested’ in any sense of the word—” You stopped short. Erwin was staring again, a self-satisfied smirk threatening to give him away.

“So there is a guy.” You protested at the smug waggle of his eyebrows. You searched around your vicinity for something to throw at him. Finding nothing, you reopened the tea cabinet and hurled a teaspoon at Erwin’s head. He ducked out of the way with a light chuckle. “Easy. You know, I really ought to have a word with this tea critic of yours.”

“There’s no guy. And why do you assume it’s a guy anyway?” 

“I know you better than anyone else, for one.” Erwin bobbed his head in thought. “And so, I’d like a word.” The clock chimed, alerting you to the next hour. Erwin stood, and you left his office together. You frowned at him as he locked the door from the hallway, not forgetting the bouquet in his hands for a second.

“What’s it to you anyway? You’re off to see Marie.” 

Erwin pocketed his keys, eyes avoiding yours.

“When you have the same tea for so long, some wiseass shouldn’t be waltzing in talking about things they don’t know about. That’s all.” You took the canister out of your pocket, studying the label with furrowed brows.

“Wow, I didn’t know you were so passionate about tea.” 

Red moved somewhere in front of your face, and as you looked up, the red blur had become a single flower plucked from Marie’s bouquet. Erwin offered it to you.

“I’ll see you tomorrow for expedition prep,” Erwin said, breaking you out of your trance. You took it in your hands.

“See you tomorrow.” With one last faint smile, Erwin disappeared down the stairwell.

***

You didn’t have a vase. You had never been gifted flowers before, so the single flower Erwin gave you sat in the nicest, tallest glass you owned. Due to the wide mouth, the stem flopped to the side, displaying the petals at an angle. 

You sat at your kitchen table, having just had dinner. An empty plate moved off to the side, you rested your head on your crossed arms, lost in the makeshift container. You tried not to think about how Erwin’s night with Marie was going. 

You had seen her a few months back, accidentally running into her somewhere in the market. She told you that she didn’t see many of the old group around��� not that you were a part of it in the first place— but that you should join Nile in visiting her at the pub. She owned it now. You went a few times during your cadet years, a part of you wondering if perhaps the two of you could be friends. It never clicked through no fault of your own or hers, and you stopped as soon as you graduated. 

With a groan, you buried your face in your arms before snapping yourself back up again. You plucked your black, beat-up leather notebook from the adjacent shelf, and with a pen from a nearby jar, you flipped to one of your pages in progress. 

A neat list of Levi’s complaints with the reverse grip sat on the left side of the page, and a jumbled mess of lines interweaved to point toward possible solutions. Some arrows were crossed entirely out, with new lines overlapping them. Unlabeled microcalculations littered the spaces in between, left unfinished when you got to a point where you could do the math in your head. 

You stared at the book for a while, scribbling and jotting things you knew were half-hearted ideas. Your guesswork littered page after page until the ink began to stain your fingers, and just when you were starting to get sick of looking at your writing, a firm knock sounded at the door. 

It thumped three times exactly, and you buried your face in your hands at the prospect of having to keep thinking about this stupid reverse hold technique. But you brought it on yourself. Naively, you wondered if you could convince Levi to do something else. He seemed like he could be easily persuaded to clean your kitchen. Maybe you could read a book or perform some other leisurely activity you haven’t had the time or energy to do.

“I left it open,” you moaned, “Just don’t expect me to feed you—”

You had expected Levi, but when the door opened, Erwin stumbled through. He held the door with a lazy grip, the front of his long jacket completely undone, exposing his white button-down and dark-colored slacks. His face drooped in the way that most people did when they had too much to drink. Erwin hardly drank, let alone overdrank. 

You immediately jumped up, running to the door to support him. Erwin practically collapsed in your arms when you came near, his dead weight almost forcing you to the floor. He wrapped his arms around you tightly, anchoring the both of you firmly to the ground below. Your door didn’t quite close, allowing a sliver of light from the outside lamps to enter your apartment. 

He smelled strongly of whiskey. You tried to pull him away to talk to him directly, but he didn’t budge, head buried deep in the crook of your neck. 

He just held you wordlessly.

“Marie is getting married,” he said, hardly above a whisper. Your cheek moved against the hair just behind his ear as you turned in surprise. You rubbed your hand gently between his shoulder blades, your other tracing the back of his collar. He tightened his grip on you, refusing to move. 

“Oh, Erwin…” You sighed, and you felt him shake once. “I’m sorry.”

After all this time, he was still in love with her.

And you knew it, too. You’ve always known. 

You knew it when you went to his graduation dinner.

You knew it when you found his unfinished love letters to her when he was promoted to Section Commander and got his office. 

You didn’t know what you were apologizing for.

You let him find comfort in you, taking the time he needed in your presence as you stared off at where the wall met the ceiling from over his shoulder. You felt something deteriorating in you like a slow spiral that settled into what you could only describe as heartbreak. A few tears prickled at your eyes, but you refused to shed them. 

After an eternity, Erwin finally rose, the withdrawing of his grasp also withdrawing his warmth. He let out a huff, almost in disbelief of himself. The only evidence of his crying soaked into the shoulder of your shirt. 

“Go sit down. I’ll bring you tea.” With another labored breath, Erwin nodded. He slipped out of his jacket. You took it off his shoulders to hang up by the door. He placed his shoes neatly underneath, slowing impressive dexterity for a man who might not remember the night in the morning. Erwin popped open a few buttons on his shirt as he went to sit. 

You went to the kitchen, preparing your beverages with the same tea you had always used. He took it from you graciously. 

“I only have tea that you don’t like. I thought I’d opt for the familiar one.” 

“I can’t say I have the right to be picky,” he laughed lightly, staring at his rippled reflection in the cup. “Thank you.” 

“It’s not a problem. What else are friends for?” Erwin watched as you set your cup on the coffee table before you.

“Yeah… friends.” 

He glanced around your apartment. He hadn’t been there for quite some time, but even so, little had changed. Your kitchen table sat four, but the one you sat in every time was the only one not neatly pushed in. You have had the same water kettle since you first joined the Scouts. He remembered when you bought it. You were worried that you got ripped off, but more than ten years later, it still did the job. Pages of handwritten notes were designated into piles across every surface, some better hidden than others.

“That’s not your ODM gear,” Erwin pointed out, observing the pile of gear in the corner of the living area. Even if it was yours, keeping swords and sheaths in one’s living area didn’t align with standard policy. 

“Oh, um.” You followed his gaze. “I was doing some experimenting, I guess you could call it.” Erwin took a sip of his tea, beginning to sober up some.

“You’ve been spending too much time with Hanji,” he joked, his smile fading as he played with the cup's handle. “How come you never told me about it?” Erwin leaned forward, taking a paper from a pile on your coffee table, nursing his steaming beverage as he glazed over it. He flipped it over. “You weren’t kidding…”

“That’s not even all of it.” You stood, running to grab your journal and the myriad of pages from the kitchen table. Moving your tea out of the way, you splayed it on the table. Your complex mathematics, crude diagrams, and painstakingly thought-out theories. Erwin poured over it all.

You expected him to say something, but he remained quiet. He flipped the pages over, revealing just as sophisticated backs. 

“These are our current techniques for Titan-Engaged Combat,” he said, almost to himself. He set his empty cup down. “And you calculated the most efficient navigation for the best gas conservation and highest striking power… Where did you get these numbers? Who taught you this?” Thrown off by his questions, you almost smiled.

“Do you remember the closest shelf to the register at the shop? The first half of the non-fiction section?”

He did remember.

And all this time, Erwin had only thought about what he could teach you.

“I never knew you did this.” He flipped through your journal. It dated back years, and judging by the near identical ones that lined your bookshelf, he guessed it wasn’t the only one. “It’s impressive. It could be, well, life-saving.” 

You thanked him awkwardly, not used to sharing your hobby with anyone. Erwin sat back against the cushion of your couch, studying your work. You leaned an elbow back, sitting on your side as you slung your legs over his lap to read with him. And then he laughed, letting his head fall back, and the page drop to your knees. 

“What’s so funny?” you asked. Erwin’s chest rose as he breathed in deeply.

“Just Hanji, huh?” he exhaled, another laugh breaking up the stream as he pinched at the bridge of his nose. Erwin shook his head, his typically neat hair turning just a bit ruffled. “I was worried for nothing.”

“Worried? Why were you—” 

You didn’t know how it happened. 

Erwin’s nose nudged against yours. You felt him lean toward you, and like that, you let him kiss you. 

Your eyes fluttered closed. He was gentle, and his lips were smooth. It was clumsy at first, but you quickly learned to follow his lead, falling into a rhythm as his hand ran up your jaw and as far as it could into your hair. You had waited for this moment for so long, but now that it was finally a reality, you couldn’t stop that nagging, sad, and confused pit in your chest.

“Erwin?” Your eyes remained closed as he kissed the side of your mouth, leading a trail of sloppy kisses down your jaw. You found yourself quickly, taking him by the shoulders and pushing him back, holding him at arm’s length as you stared into his wide, lost blues. You shook your head slowly, repeating his name softly. “Erwin.”

He flinched back from you instantly, hands flying again to his face. Erwin rubbed at the skin around his eyes, brushing aggressively over his cheeks and through his now messy hair. 

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” Erwin drawled in a voice you had never heard before. “I’m sorry.”

You didn’t know what to say. Your knee dipped into the cushion under you as you reached out, trying to place your hands on his. In a stroke of irony, you weren’t allowed to say anything at all. 

“Do you not know how to close a goddamn door? You see all these moths—”

All the three of you could do for a second was look at each other. Erwin sat up straight and alert, ready to stand at any second against your intruder. You had shot yourself to the opposite side of the couch in a moment of instinct, and Levi slowly closed your door, making sure the latch clicked. 

You shot up after the momentary shock wore off, instantly taking Levi by the sleeve.

“Now’s really not a good time.”

“Is it, now?” Levi stopped, not letting himself be tugged along. He made a point to glance at the cups of tea on the coffee table and back at you. He sent a pointed glare towards Erwin. “Having some evening tea, are we, Erwin?” Erwin stood, arms crossed, as he regarded your new guest.

“Levi,” he acknowledged. 

“Levi!” you hissed, tugging him back toward the door. You held it open, practically pleading with him. “Out!”

With a final glare toward Erwin, Levi shrugged your hand off with a jerk of his arm and left. By the time you turned back to Erwin, he was already beginning to collect his things. 

“I should probably be going, too,” he sighed, slipping on his jacket.

“Erwin, wait, I—”

“I’m sorry. What happened tonight was inappropriate and extremely unprofessional, especially for a superior and subordinate officer—”

“Erwin, please, can we talk about this?”

“I will see you in the morning for expedition prep.”

You couldn’t stop him as he left.

***

Erwin arrived at the meeting with Expedition Command just three minutes early with Miche in tow. You had been waiting for him outside, several copies of his requested documents organized neatly in your arms, watching other senior officials enter the meeting room. Ever the one to be at least a half hour early, Erwin arriving to a session on time struck you into a panic. You nearly called someone, convinced there had been an emergency. But with five minutes to spare, you heard him from down the hall. You knew his gait anywhere.

He strode with purpose down the hall, jaw as squared as ever and weight to his step. Your heart jumped, the events from the night before still fresh in your memory. You hoped to talk to him after everything had been squared away from the next expedition.

You had bolted up from the bench you were sitting on and stood at attention with a salute. Erwin regarded you coolly, never dropping an ounce of his collected and upright professionalism. You tried not to let the fact that he treated you differently in private whip your thoughts into a frenzy, but his avoidance of your eye wasn’t something you could ignore. 

“Ah, you brought the copies. Perfect. Miche can take those from you.” Erwin walked past you, the slight breeze of his quick pace flowing through the tips of your hair. You hardly noticed as Miche towered over you, hands ready to receive your papers as instructed. You craned your neck, looking at Erwin’s back as he approached the meeting room doors. “You are dismissed.”

“Section Commander? Am I not also on this meeting, too?” 

“There’s no need for there to be two team leads here, not for meeting this early in advance.”

“But the expedition is less than a week away—”

“Team Leader,” Erwin snapped, turning toward you. His gaze was lidded and cold, and his lips drew into a tight, untelling line. “You are dismissed.”

His words lodged in your chest, swirling around your stomach until you became nauseous. You didn’t remember saluting him or handing Miche your copies. You heard yourself say, “Yes, sir,” but you didn’t remember speaking.

You hurried out of the hall as quickly as possible and then out of Headquarters completely. And with a single stop at your apartment, you rode out of Trost on horseback. 

***

“Graah!! Agrahhh!” You slashed your way through the compilation of dummies stationed on the forest floor, each outfitted with durable, twirling arms made specifically for sword training. The force of your cuts caused them to spin with a force of equal magnitude to your strike. You screamed into the training forest, scaring a few birds overhead who flocked out of the leaves above. 

Hot, concentrated air blew out your nose as you maintained your labored breathing. You swung your swords, burning red-hot as you made your way through the training area, the sound of metal clashing filling your ears with a piercing scratching sound. Your muscles knew where to strike before you could even process the rapid turns in front of your eyes. 

You ducked under a spinning arm, driving your swords up in an arch.

Why were you taken off of the meeting with Expedition Command?

The arm fell to the ground. The force of slicing it off cramped your thumb, giving you another reason to scream and cry out as you slashed at the remaining dummies with reckless abandon. 

Why did Erwin refuse to talk to you? If you let him continue, would he have demoted you like this?

The very thought of demotion made your blood boil, your rage launching you to conclusions and your swords in all directions. You weren’t even thinking about your swings anymore.

All these years following, pouring tea and making copies while Erwin wept over a woman he hardly made an effort to pursue? Turning down Hanji’s offer for a promotion within their ranks for this? For a man who never even saw you in the first place—?

An arm from one of the dummies hit you dead in the face. The velocity at which it spun ensured an instant and solid crack in your nose. You shrieked again as you felt a warm stream of blood pour from your face, your last strike sending the offending arm flying off into the forest. And with a final fit of rage, you sent your swords flying, too.

You dropped to your knees in the middle of the busted-up training circle, frustrated tears falling from your cheeks as you brushed your wild stray hairs from your face. You took a second to feel sorry for yourself and another to pop your nose back into place before you went to retrieve your swords. If you kept bleeding, you would reluctantly ride down to Trost to see a medic.

“You should really watch where you throw those things. You could’ve hurt someone.”

As if your day wasn’t bad enough…

“Leave me alone, Levi.” 

You could have cried seeing him. Hell, you were crying anyway. Had it been anyone else standing at the edge of the training grounds with your swords, you might have snapped and wailed at them, too. Levi held a stoic expression on his face if not his usual frown. Not wanting to engage, you reloaded your grips with new swords from your sheath. 

You turned back toward the training dummies, giving some half-assed swipes to the spinning arms. They didn’t rotate nearly as fast as they just were.

“People are looking for you.”

“Since when did you become an errand dog?” You spat, still refusing to look his way. Tears were still streaming down your face; no matter how you willed them to stop, they just kept coming. You heard Levi shift somewhere behind you.

“I dunno,” he answered, “When did you start sleeping with your boss?”

You whirled around instantly, eyes puffy and teeth clenched as your face contorted in barely restrained rage.

“I don’t! We aren’t—” you barked, the clasp where your swords fit into your grips clattering just slightly from the shake in your hands. You tugged out a portion of your shirt from under the straps on your shoulder to wipe away the wetness from your eyes. “Please, just leave me alone.” 

Your newly attached swords dug into the ground adjacent to your feet, and with new tears came more swipes of your sleeve. With your vision so obscured, you didn’t even notice Levi approach you, the reins of his horse in one hand and yours in the other. The sudden appearance made you jump a bit. Levi had thrown your old swords into the dirt. He offered the reins to you again, holding out his arm. 

“Let’s go.” His voice was low and soft. Your brow furrowed, your brain still in a fog. Levi spoke before you had a chance, almost reading your mind. “We’re not going back to headquarters.” 

You collected yourself with no time to be embarrassed over your display of emotion. You didn’t know why you followed him. Rudderless, you didn’t know what else to do.

***

You tried your horses up between two narrow areas somewhere in Wall Sina. The thin pathway opened up to a broad, square area hidden between the tall buildings. The height of them made the ground below appear dark. Levi led you through the thin maze of alleys until you finally arrived at a slender, rock-faced building with a wooden door. The shudders were open, allowing sunlight to illuminate the wooden floorboards below your feet.

Looking around, you couldn’t tell what the establishment was. There was a bar, but nothing appeared to be behind it. Tables lined the sides of the room, but there weren’t enough to accommodate many customers for dining. A woman sat at one of them, a broom in one hand and a cigarette in the other. She made half-hearted attempts to blow her smoke out the open windows. 

Levi exchanged a brief look with her before marching into a room behind the bar. You stepped into the center of the room, lining your feet up with the orb of light that reflected onto the center. You finally noticed how scuffed up your boots were.

Levi was back instantly, motioning for you to follow him up a set of stairs to the left of the bar. By the time you even reached the doorway, he had already managed to make it up two flights. Random items littered the landings, obscuring your path with folded tables, cases of liquor, and assorted cleaning products. You stared up the winding railings, jogging along quickly to follow. 

The stairs led to the roof, where Levi was already sitting at a beat-up table for two. A few clotheslines sat behind him with linens blowing in the wind. A mixture of other assorted items was pushed off to the side. A table missing a leg sat upside down. A few broken lamps lay strewn across the rooftop, among other evidence of broken things abandoned. Levi had already poured wine into two tall-stemmed glasses.

You sat on the chair closest to the door, back tense and your bottom at the edge of the seat. Levi swirled the wine in his glass, an ankle slung across his opposite knee as he looked out across Sina. He didn’t speak, let alone acknowledge you. You took the wine in your hand, giving it a swish as he did before bringing it tentatively to your lips. To your surprise, you enjoyed the flavor. 

“You didn’t think I’d choose a shitty wine, did you?” Levi lounged back on his slotted wooden chair.

“I just didn’t take you for one to drink, I guess.”

“Fair enough. I don’t make a habit of it.” He placed the glass back on the table with slender fingers. You still held yours, not knowing what to do with your hands. You stared down at it, and the various items littered the ground within your field of vision. You ignored your peripherals completely, avoiding having to look at Levi at all costs. 

“You just drink nice wines whenever you please?” you asked absentmindedly, not really looking for an answer. He crossed his arms, adjusting how his shirt sat on his shoulders.

“I guess you could say I have an eye for quality.” You missed his lingering glance, letting the silence between you fester. Levi, all for silence on any given day, was unbothered for the most part. But for once, he wasn’t simply content to let the quiet pass him by. “You and Erwin are close, huh?”

“Please, I really don’t want to talk about this,” you groaned, squinting your eyes closed as you cringed to yourself. 

“I don’t ask for my sake, believe me.” Levi played with the base of his wine glass, tracing the circular shape with the pad of his finger. “Who else are you going to talk to?” 

The simple question struck you. He was right; you didn’t think you even had anyone else you could talk to about Erwin. There was Hanji, but as a fellow section commander, talking to them about personal matters might overstep some professional boundaries— not to mention if they decided to report Erwin’s abuse of power to the commander. Team Leader Miche didn’t seem to be the type to give the sort of advice you were looking for either. 

“We knew each other as kids,” you found yourself blurting after another sip of wine. Levi settled farther into his chair, ready to listen. And he did, patiently drinking his wine as you told him all about how you first met, the holiday dinners, the day Erwin selected his branch, Marie, and the letters. He remained quiet for most of it, only interjecting occasionally to ask questions.

“Do you even want to be in the Scouts? Or is it just because of him?” he asked, somewhere between your recount of the celebration dinner and Erwin’s promotion to section commander. You had never thought of it before. You chose to join to be close to Erwin, and now, having spent almost your whole life in the service, you weren’t sure you could even make a distinction. 

“I think in the beginning, it was because of him. And now that I’m good at what I do, I’m not sure where else I would go,” you sighed. “And if I’m good, then why change now, I guess.” Levi scoffed.

“That’s a poor reason.” His words made you chuckle.

“That’s exactly what Erwin said when I first told him I was going into the Cadet Corps…” you trailed off, the smile on your lips fading slowly. You found it funny: your best friend was giving you the cold shoulder; meanwhile, you were venting your frustrations to the man who was sent just a month ago to assassinate him. You kept talking until there was nothing left to talk about. “I don’t know when I fell for him.”

“Well, you’ve always been in love with him. I’ve barely known you for that long, and even I can tell that much.” You nodded along, trying not to take his words as a blow to your pride. You accidentally met his eye. “And I assure you in no uncertain terms that Erwin has been very aware of that, too.” You cringed again. 

“You think so?” You buried your face in another drink from your glass. 

“Do I think you’ve been breadcrumbed along by an emotionally unavailable jackass so he has an emotional support blankie? Yeah, I do think so.” Every word struck you through the chest. Levi frowned as deeply as ever, a genuine frustration painted on his brow. You wondered if it was your naivety that made him so angry. 

“I wouldn’t say I’m in love with him,” you said, only partially convinced yourself. Levi didn’t even humor you with a response.

“Hm.” He stood, empty glass in his hand, as he stretched out his lower back. “I’m going to give you my unsolicited advice, but I’m only going to say it once.” Levi turned to face you as you still sat. His head blocked the sun perfectly from your eyes, a halo of sunbeams shooting out from his short strains of black hair. “If you’re going to stay, at least stay for a good reason. Not because of some schmuck who can’t make up his mind.” 

He held his hand out to you, not making a show of doing so. You took it.

“Wow, Levi, who knew you could be so soft?”

“Tch, remind me never to try to help you again.” 

***

You thought about what Levi said almost religiously in the days leading up to the next expedition. And as your administrative responsibilities gradually dwindled, you had much more downtime. 

Erwin only spoke to you when necessary, and even then, his words were far more sparing than they needed to be. The passive comments should have hurt more than they did, but your racing thoughts only served as a shield to numb the dull ache in your chest. 

A week until the next expedition turned into days and then a singular day. All the while, Erwin remained your section commander and nothing more. 

The last meeting had adjourned. Commander Shadis had called a gathering of the four section commanders and their team leaders, as was usual before expeditions. Erwin had departed quickly, speaking urgently to various other officers on his way out. He avoided you expertly, ensuring you didn’t have an opportunity to approach him after the discussions. As he made his way briskly down the hall to his office, he heaved a light sigh, he too wrapped up in his thoughts. 

He tugged open the door to his office only to find you already sitting behind his desk. Erwin couldn’t help his pause and the apparent surprise on his face, but he didn’t let the expression linger long. 

“Can I help you, Team Leader?” He regarded you formally and coldly. You frowned, standing to shrug off your jacket. You folded it so the crest didn’t show before tossing it across the width of Erwin’s wooden desk. 

“I’m not coming to you as a team leader, Erwin.” You tried to not let your shaking show, equal parts of you mortified and invigorated by your audacity to gatekeep a section commander’s desk. Judging by the steepening frown on Erwin’s lip, he had little patience for it. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

“Things have been busy.”

“None more than usual.” You matched his frown. “You’ve been avoiding me.” 

“I heard you the first time, Team Leader.” 

You didn’t imagine Erwin would openly converse with you so easily, but you also didn’t expect his outright icy refusal. You had never made Erwin angry before; in fact, you didn’t think you could recall a time that you weren’t in his good graces. Now, as you stood in direct defiance of his passive-aggressive avoidance of you, you felt shaken to the core and tried not to let it show.

“You still want to talk about work? Fine.” You sat back down in the chair behind Erwin’s desk, the joints at the base shifting. It felt unnatural here with him across the room where you usually stood. “It’s in poor taste to come onto your subordinates, Section Commander.” 

“And yet, that’s not the part you have an issue with.” 

He studied you for a moment, and with reluctance, he tugged off his own uniform jacket, throwing it on the leather couch to his side. Erwin squared back his shoulders, unconsciously adjusting how his clothes sat under his uniform straps as his arms coiled over his broad chest. Yes, he had grown significantly over the years and had the sculpted muscles to show for his decade of ODM training. 

“It was unprofessional.”

“Cut the crap; you made it clear that isn’t what we’re talking about right now, so stop pulling your punches.” He spoke as levelly as ever, the most calculated bite in his voice so as to not give away his seething frustration. 

“You seemed happy to see Marie again.” Your voice began softly, slowly gaining momentum as you continued. Your voice was starting to shake, forecasting your incoming tears. “Then you had the audacity to drink yourself stupid and crawl to my doorstep, and only when you knew you couldn’t have her did you even look at me.”

Erwin said nothing as he stared forward with a hard, sunken face. He didn’t sit, perhaps in the same way you couldn’t will yourself to stand. 

“Is that it?” he spat disapprovingly, almost bored. Your resolve wavered with just three words, him perceiving you as childish, as he seemed to typically do.

“Is that it?” You repeated, aghast. “Did you just ask me, is that it?”

“You’re impeding me from my work because you’re jealous.”

“Of course I’m jealous!” You jerked forward in the chair, hardly realizing the tending of your legs and the curt gesturing of your hands. “And how dare you try to diminish that. When you’ve known this whole time how I’ve felt about you.” You didn’t even try to hide your open sobbing. “Because you knew, and you never felt the same.”

“Hung up on things that don’t matter.”

Your parted lips revealed clenched teeth as you continued to shamelessly meet his eye. 

“I would have followed you to hell and back, and I have—”

“And so has every other soldier under my command—”

“I’m not just a soldier under your command, Erwin!” A clap of silence overtook his office. Erwin’s back faced towards you as he aggressively rubbed at the back of his neck. You were standing out of your seat now, hands on the surface of his desk. “We’re friends—” You wiped the stream of wetness from your cheeks. 

Erwin heaved a deep, low breath, the sound heavy enough to fill the air. 

“Things are different now.” He was struggling, but he kept it together better than you were.

“You had a place at my dining table for years. You knew how to work the register at the shop.”

“Things are different than back then.”

“Are they?” you asked bitterly. You held your hands together as if in prayer, resting your forehead against them. “When did they change? Because I—”

You were cut off by the exasperated sound of your name. And by the time Erwin turned around, his face was red, frustrated, and puffy. A few strands of golden hair hung over his forehead as he looped a thumb in his belt.

“Things are different in the service. It’s why I couldn’t be with her, and it’s not different with you! We are here to serve and die— there is no other way out— and I need you to understand that!” He was shouting, screaming. Erwin leaned slightly toward you, one leg in front of him. “You don’t understand how instantaneously you could be taken from me! No, you didn’t understand when you joined the Cadet Corps, and you don’t understand now!”

You were both a mess, physically worn, and voices hoarse from yelling. You had drenched Erwin’s desk. You stared down at the puddle of tears, the hem of your jacket in your watery sight. 

“I joined the Survey Corps for you. To be with you.”

Erwin strode to the door with what looked to be a shake of his head. In an instant, you were around his desk, running after him as you usually did, but you weren’t quick enough.

“We all have our own reasons for being here. You’ll find a better one.”

He shut the door in your face.

***

It felt dull for an expedition day. 

Exhaustion tugged on your eyes. Having had poor sleep the night before, you woke up two hours earlier than you needed. The gathering of horses outside the gates, waiting for them to be heaved open, made you antsy. The looming dread felt akin to the moments before an exam when you were back in the Cadet Corps. 

But you didn’t have time to reminisce, as in an instant, you were off through the gates, then across the plains. The pop of smoke guns was the only thing anchoring you to reality, as even the harsh rhythm of your horse couldn’t quite pull you out of your haze. 

The formation held as you crossed the land, making it into the forest and just past the point you had roughly achieved the last expedition. That in itself would garner the expedition as a success. Even despite potential casualties, it would hold weight in justifying further funding. 

But the luck you had in conquering your titan encounters soon ended as the entire formation was flanked, and everything was plunged into chaos. As the formation broke, the field was filled with screams and the whinnying of horses. 

Commander Shadis always kept Erwin close, an in turn, only Erwin’s teams remained close to the center of the unit. No one died in Erwin’s squads. You rode along, torso close to the back of your horse to avoid being hit by flying debris. 

The retreat had begun.

“Team Leader, look out!” 

You didn’t hear it in time. A tremendous hand flew out of nowhere, smacking your horse from under you and crushing your right leg. Your vision became a jumbled mess of earth, animal, and blood as you were sent rolling across the field, jumped over by other retreating soldiers. You shot up immediately but were forced back to the ground before you could even stand. Your leg was bent at an unnatural angle, the worst of it hidden under the cloth of your uniform pants. 

A titan loomed overhead, it’s shadow eclipsing you as you sat helplessly on the ground. You turned in the direction of the retreating soldiers. Time seemed to slow as you met Erwin’s eyes.

He had only turned to look over his shoulder for a moment. You saw as his lips parted in terror. You watched as he began to veer his horse to turn back, the strands of her mane moving with the motion of her pivoting head. She whinnied loudly over the sound of gore and battle as she fought against him to run as fast as she could away from the man-eating titans, with or without her rider aboard. All within a matter of milliseconds.

He could see it all in your wide eyes.

The very last things he said to you swarmed him all at once. 

Then, a spray of blood. A slide to the straps holding your sheaths. 

The hand that reached out to you fell to the ground. The titan fell forward, and before you were crushed, an arm wrapped uncomfortably around your ribs and pulled you to safety. You were dizzy. The rhythmic thumping of another horse continued to rattle your brain as you were splayed uncomfortably across the back just above the front legs. You tried to pull yourself up to look around, but a hand forced your head down. 

“Levi?”

“Shut up and keep your head down.”

Yeah, it was Levi.

***

You were taken to the infirmary as soon as you returned from the expedition. You spent the night there, and when Levi wasn’t out doing his duties as a soldier or getting you food, he was with you. He was sitting next to you reading a book when Commander Shadis knocked on the door to your room. 

You tried to salute him.

“You’re injured, soldier. Don’t strain yourself.” 

He stood in the center of the small room, subtly looking for a place to sit. You made wordless eye contact with Levi, and with a small grunt of effort, he stood and took his leave. Commander Shadis took his seat.

“Am I in trouble, Commander?” you asked nervously, shifting up on your pillows. 

“No, no, nothing of that sort,” he assured you, reaching into his jacket pocket to pull out a few folded pages. You thought you recognized the writing on them. He stopped quirking an eyebrow at you. “Unless there is, of course, trouble that you’ve gotten yourself into that you’d like to report, Team Leader.”

“Not at all.” You let out a breathy laugh. “You just look like you’re here on business. I guess I was just a bit—”

“Nervous?” Shadis interjected, his shoulders bobbing as he chuckled to himself. “My commander just about scared the living crap out of me when I was a soldier. But I’m not here to reminisce.” Shadis unfolded the papers, and as he laid them at the edge of your bed, you realized that the writing was yours. 

“I am here to offer you the position of section commander.” You could only describe the expression he wore as proud. “I’m just sorry the proposal isn’t more formal, but what can you do in this line of work?” You gaped at him, still trying to piece together what he said in your mind and how he obtained your notes. 

“Maybe this is shooting myself in the foot, Commander, but—” You knitted your brow at him. —“I didn’t think my performance has been all that impressive. Team Leader Zacharius—”

“Has already been offered the other position,” Shadis interrupted. The corner of his lip twitched downward in a skeptical pout. You supposed you both felt as if you were missing a piece of information. “Section Commander Smith put in a glowing recommendation for you in addition to these. He and I believe you could live up to your potential best out from under his command.”

“Section Commander Smith wants to get rid of me,” you jested, a convincing smile on your face as you pondered over what was said in Erwin’s meeting with Shadis. 

“On the contrary, I’d say he’s reluctant to see you leave. Or at least that was the impression I received.” Shadis rested an ankle over his knee as he sat back in the flimsy hospital chair. “Section Commander Smith was adamant about your abilities, both on the field and in this secret hobby you’ve been keeping.” He gestured to the pages he brought, taking them in his hands. “If I had to scold you for one thing, it is that you’ve done us all a disservice for not bringing these forward.”

“I sincerely apologize, Commander.” 

“But myself and Section Commander Smith have done a greater disservice by not seeing this brilliance, not fostering it, sooner.” Shadis gathered the pages together and placed them on your bedside table, eyeing the rest of the pages Levi had brought for you to keep busy. He turned back to you, hands clasped between his knees as he leaned forward. “What do you say, Team Leader?”

Your voice stalled in your throat. 

“I don’t even know if any of those will make a difference on the field.”

“Have you not been helping Levi Ackerman on his reverse-hold technique? He took out ten titans alone during this past expedition.”

“I feel that should be attributed to Levi’s— I mean, Ackerman’s— prowess rather than anything I did.” Shadis sat, staring at you as a growing disappointment clouded his face. You averted your eyes. “And Section Commander Smith saw his talent and recruited him in the first place.” Shadis said nothing, only heaving out a steady sigh. You sat in silence for a beat. “I’m sorry if you’ve been deceived into thinking my abilities are greater than they are. I don’t want to deceive you further.” 

Shadis sighed again, standing.

“The only one who’s been deceived is you,” he hummed. “I would very much like the opportunity to invest in your skills, but I am not about to take a chance on someone who doesn’t even believe in themselves, you understand me?” You watched the crest on his back as he approached the door. “I will leave you to think about it.”

***

When you were finally released, Levi helped you to your apartment. He didn’t allow you to do a thing. 

“Hey! What did I say about getting up on your own?” He scolded from the kitchen. Something that smelled good bubbled on the stove behind him, filling the immediate area with steam. You smelled the air, ready to take guesses at what he was cooking. Levi stopped in the middle of chopping something on a cutting board with rigor to shoot you a pointed glare. 

“I have to get used to the crutches eventually. Don’t you think it’s been long enough?” You hobbled out of your bedroom, content just to be out of bed. Levi frowned, eyeing you for any hint of a tumble. A cotton apron hung around his neck, another item he had fished out from the depths of your kitchen cabinets. He put the knife down on the cutting board but remained where he stood. 

“Tch, says you and your shitty perception of time.”

Just as you were about to sit at the dining room table to watch Levi work some more, a knock came at your front door. Something rang out in your chest as soon as you heard it. Evidenced by nothing, you already knew who it was. Levi turned to rinse off his hands in the sink. 

“I got it.”

“No, wait,” you interjected swiftly, and, to your surprise, Levi stopped. He offered you a questioning look, but you were already hobbling forward. You smiled at him reassuringly. “I’ll be alright. Gotta get used to the crutches, remember?” He let you move forward, returning to the kitchen as you shouted to the visitor on your doorstep. 

And as you expected, Erwin Smith stood at your door. You stood in the doorway, leaving the entrance just ajar enough to accommodate your form. 

“Uh, hi,” he said breathlessly, and just like that, you were twelve and working at your family’s bookshop again. You didn’t think you’d ever see a day where Erwin would be nervous to talk to you, yet all you had to do was look at your doormat. 

“Are you done giving me the cold shoulder?” You quirked a brow, and Erwin let out another deep sigh in response. A surrender. 

“I’m sorry. I know I’m the last person you probably want to see.” He glanced over your shoulder, spotting Levi cooking in the background. You couldn’t see the glower that Levi shot Erwin from behind his bangs. Erwin turned his attention back toward you. “And I won’t keep you. I just wanted to make sure you were alright.” 

“I’m alright,” you assured him with a nod. “It wasn’t as bad as they thought it was. I might miss the next scheduled expedition, but Commander Shadis said we could find ways to work around it.” Erwin perked up, his thick eyebrows shooting up on his forehead.

“You already spoke to Commander Shadis?” 

“He offered me the rank of section commander.” Erwin’s eyes lit up with his warm smile as he shifted his weight. 

“Very good, you deserve it. I know you’ll make an excellent section commander. No one deserves it more than you.” You leaned against the doorway, amused at his feigning ignorance. You couldn’t help your smug expression as you gave in to your temptation to burst his bubble.

“He told me you put in a golden recommendation.” 

“He did, did he?” Erwin shook his head, blond lashes fluttering shut as he deflated just slightly. Outmanuvering him wasn’t something that happened often, but it sure as hell was a wonderful feeling. “And so I did.” But even in his defeat, he continued to hold sentiment in his reflective, blue eyes. 

“I’m telling him that I accept tomorrow.”

“Well, in that case, let me be the first to congratulate you, Section Commander.”” Erwin pulled a bouquet of red flowers out from behind his back, holding them up to offer to you. You hadn’t even noticed he was even holding them. “I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I look forward to working with you as your peer and earning your trust in me.”

You looked to him, then to the bouquet. With a plucking of your fingers, you withdrew a single flower from the middle. You made the motion awkwardly, balancing your second crutch under your elbow as you shifted your weight uncomfortably.

“I look forward to that…” You waggled your eyebrows. “Section Commander.” Erwin’s mouth formed a thin-lipped smile. He gave you a nod.

“Section Commander.”

You shut the door without a single insect entering your apartment. 

Just in time for dinner.

Thank you to all who liked, reblogged, followed, and supported. Your support means so much and is greatly appreciated.

Writer's Notes: I thought it was fun to write Erwin of all people as that one kid who teaches you things you "shouldn't know" because he's just doing it all by accident.

This fic drew heavy inspiration from "The Imitation Game," in a way. I had always wanted to write a fic that mirrored the scene when Alan wanted to give his love letter to Christopher or something where Erwin was an upperclassman-like figure. It's probably not detectable in the actual fic, but I did go back and watch some of Alan Turing's early life scenes. Weird, considering I only watched the movie once when it first came out.

Please, I encourage you to write complex notes in the replies, reblogs, or inbox. Please. I beg of you.

[welkinsky]

Fanfic idea with Levi about him falling for a girl who’s more bubbly than him. She’s been into him since she met him but never thought she had a chance with him.

Levi X Reader | Bubbly Reader

You had a naturally bubbly personality and always looked at the good side of things. Your ideals were to do everything always with love or not do it at all. So even if the outcome were bad you'd always consider it to be good because the intentions and efforts behind them were all that mattered.

When you two first met, you were warned that Levi was one cold man. So you decide to approach him accordingly but after meeting him you could see that this was just the way he was on the outside, his intentions were always good. Yes sometimes he might come off as cold and rude but ultimately it had a greater reason behind it.

Although you two had completely different ways of handling people you both understood each other and made the decisions with mutual understanding when it came to your teams.

Levi has never been the one to pay any attention to any love interest shown by anyone. After working with him for this long, it was clear to you. So you never really thought you'll ever get with him. But that doesn't mean you did not find yourself thinking about him constantly.

Every little thing he did was just so pure and out of care for his team even if it meant that he had to punish them every now and then. You also hated how he always distanced himself from everyone. You knew his past, Hange told you. After that you wanted to show him that the world is not that bad and now he is safe, he can let his guard down.

But the more you tried the more he resisted and pushed you away. But you were determined. Which he hated but you were not ready to give up. You knew nothing will come out of this for you but you selflessly wanted to help him even if it meant that he'll never end up with you.

His POV:

You scared the shit out of him. When he met you his first thought was, "Oh great another rainbow" like an insult. But slowly he started understanding that you were not that different from him. You stood up for your morals more than he ever dared to.

It was always an interesting meeting when you were there. You knew how to shut people up with your very gentle and logical answers and no one dared to cross you because it always meant being ultimately insulted intellectually. They knew you were not someone who would be swayed easily.

But what scared him was that he knew you could see right through his cold persona. He knew it because of the silent smiles you passed as Levi would order his team around because they have been lacking recently.

He hated how you just don't know when to give up! He never asked for the random favors you did for him. He never asked you to stop by and ask how his day was going. He never asked for those flowers when he came back from the successful survey mission.

He knew he was soft with you. He just wanted to let you know that these things were not why he was soft for you, it was because he saw why you were doing all these things for him.

But when you two came together it was a completely different scenario:

Levi, who everyone doubted if he was physically capable of smiling, cracks jokes around you. It took him time but slowly he started saying his jokes out loud when only you were there. He surprisingly had a good sense of humor, he just chose to say those jokes inside his head only.

As you two were getting closer he'd pay more attention to the things that you found interesting. Like you loved flowers but not the for the sake of them but rather loved to know the meaning behind them. So usually you'll get Rosses or Buckwheat and you secretly made a jar where you'd put them once they dried. He found that jar later and blushed really hard and then put it back where he found it.

He then decided to give you flowers of different colors to make sure that your jar was colorful and made you even happier.

Seeing you made him stand up for his morals as well. He never really was the one to pay much attention to them until and unless it affected him and his team but now he understood that he cannot really ignore everyone as well.

He is always so soft to you with the way he talks and treats you. Remember how you treated him before? Yea multiply it by 10 and that is how much of a queen treatment you get.

He also developed a habit of always making sure that he has some sort of physical contact with you to make sure that you were there. Once he wakes up from sleep his hand automatically searches for you on his side and gets a little worried when he cannot find you there. And don't get me started on the disappointment when he realises that you two were not sleeping together.

______________________________

Thanks For Reading and for the ask! I'm super grateful for all the support!

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A-Z Headcanon

[mayajadewrites]

Almost: Levi Ackerman x Reader

Chapter 8: Clean

Chapter Summary: Reader is in the midst of a depression episode, and Levi refuses to be unheard. We get some sweet Levi this chapter, arguably my favorite Levi. Also cleaning Levi makes an appearance because why not!

ao3

The next day, I called in sick to work. And again. And again. 3 times. I've never called out of any job before, but the state of my mental was almost unbearable.

I didn't want to get out of bed, take care of myself, nothing of the sorts. I stayed in my bed, curled up with my favorite blanket watching Grey's Anatomy.

A therapist would probably say I'm going through a depression episode. They would be right.

My thoughts are clouded with negativity around myself that I don't want to burden on anyone else. I have sick time accrued, so why not use it.

Levi caught on to my absence on the 3rd day, since he assumed I just had 2 days off in a row and I was texting him like normal. He's been busy with work, taking on meetings and new projects.

Levi: Brat, why didn't you work today?

I close out the text thread, pushing my phone to the other side of my bed.

Bzzzzzz.

Levi: Ignoring me doesn't work.

Bzzzzzz.

Levi: You've left me no choice. I'll see you soon.

I groan, rubbing my eyes to get rid of the sleep that's still in them. Levi is serious when he says he'll see me, but I still don't want to leave my bed.

About an hour later, I hear someone banging on my door. The sounds are urgent, booming through the building.

I walk to the door, standing on my tip-toes to see who it is. Once I saw the jet black hair, I knew who it was.

I opened the door with my blanket wrapped around me, my eyes open half way.

"What is wrong with you?" Levi gently pushed me inside of the apartment, grabbing my shoulders. "What's going on? Are you sick? Did someone hurt you?"

I shook my head, looking down at my feet.

"I'll fix it. Whatever it is." Levi leaned down to my eyes, rubbing my arms gently.

"There's nothing wrong with me. I'm perfectly okay." I turn around to walk back to my room. Levi takes off his shoes at my door, then follows me.

His face turns sour once he sees the state of my room. "You've been here for days, haven't you."

I nod, burying myself in my sheets. I'm embarrassed to look at Levi. I've always wanted to impress him and here I am showing him who I really am. I'm a mess.

Levi smoothed out the sheet and sat next to me. "Tell me what's wrong."

Finally, I look at Levi and stare into his steel eyes. I could drown in them the way I was looking into them. If I don't tell him what I'm feeling now, he will more than likely never stop asking.

"I'm depressed, Levi." I sigh and sit up on the bed. "I have no motivation to do anything. My head is a bad place to be in right now."

"Tell me what your brain is telling you." Levi had a stern look on his face (no different than usual).

"That I'm not good enough. That no one will ever love me. That-" I pause, looking at him. "That you'll leave me one day because I'm so unloveable and a mess you don't want to clean up."

Levi stared at me for a moment, analyzing my features, taking in my words. I raise my eyebrow and hope that words will come out of his mouth sooner rather than later.

"I'm not leaving you." Levi put his hands on mine, rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. "If you're a mess, then I'm a mess too."

"You don't need to say that, I'm sure there are plenty of other women who are put together that would love to be with you." A tear rolls down my cheek. "Fuck, I hate crying." I wipe the tear from my face. "Especially in front of you."

Levi was silent, caressing my face slowly with his index finger. Somehow he knew exactly what I needed at that moment. No talking, just silent reassurance.

He gently pulled me down onto the bed, wrapping his arms around me. His fingers traced shapes on my skin as he left kisses on my head. I began to cry more, simply because I feel so comfortable. I expected Levi to say I'm dramatic, insult me, and leave.

That's what my father did to my mother.

We laid together for a couple of hours just soaking in each other. I occasionally felt Levi's lips on my skin, reminding me he's still there.

"Why don't we get you cleaned up?" Levi suggested as he gently pulled my arm.

"You're gonna help me shower?"

"Only if you want me to."

Well, duh I want you to. What person in their right mind wouldn't want to be naked and soapy with Levi Ackerman?

I grabbed Levi's hand, leading him to my bathroom. I brushed my teeth, making sure I scrubbed every part of my mouth.

Levi stood behind me, observing.

My back is to him as I change, sliding my t-shirt and shorts off my body, revealing my naked body. I looked at Levi's face in the mirror, which looked like he was stunned.

He said nothing though. Soon enough his shirt and pants were off, exposing his chiseled physique.

"Hot or warm?" Levi turned the shower on.

"Hot, please." I shivered, crossing my arms over my chest. Once the water was hot enough, Levi led me into the shower, making sure I was under the water.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head back - taking in the hot water. I haven't showered in days so this felt invigorating

As I pull my head back up I notice Levi staring at me with a half smile. He's sudsing up my shampoo, massaging it into my scalp, and making sure it's clean afterward. His black hair stuck to his forehead as he did this, and every move he made had me mesmerized by the way his muscles move.

Levi began washing my body, being careful on my sensitive areas. He never tried anything sexual, he just wanted to take care of me.

I smiled as Levi rubbed the washcloth over my skin, leaning my forehead on his.

"Thank you." I whisper, leaning my head on his shoulder.

"Don't thank me. Thank me by trusting me." Levi continued scrubbing, making sure every inch of me was clean.

Once Levi decided I was clean enough, he wrapped my body in a towel and kissed my forehead. "I'm staying here tonight. No if ands or buts, got it?"

I nodded, shuffling through my drawers for clean clothes. Putting on a new sweat set actually helped my mood a bit. I walked out to my living room where Levi was lighting candles while simultaneously cleaning. Leaning against the doorframe, I smiled as I watched him. He didn't seem to notice me since he was so in the zone with cleaning. His bicep twitched as he cleaned, taking off any speck of dust that lived on my furniture.

Was I taking a glimpse at my future? God, I hope so.