#but neither does the entirety of GO Season 2 so same difference

[tehcherrya]

I'm not sure how much overlap there is between the Good Omens fandom and the LOTR fandom...

However as someone in both, I can attest-- there is some mutual heartbreak that we can share-- </3

[saturnaftertaste]

what if hiram and archie but they're both girls

what if we were hiram and archie . and we were both girls

interesting premise, anon! it could go lots of different ways imo. really depends on the configuration. see one of the things that really creates the unique dynamic of hiram/archie is the fact that it’s built on the very patriarchal patterns of father-son relationships and ALSO the mafia/mob/cartel whatever (crime rings, essentially, are a male business.)

(there is also the question of race, but.)

hiram is brought into the mob the same way that archie is turned into a capo in season 2. i think before anything else, that is what shapes their dynamic that hiram does Wrong and archie Tries to Do Right. that’s the thing that shapes the entirety of season 2, right? archie wants to Do Right (protect fred) -> hiram offers him a way to do that by Doing Wrong (suggesting he start a vigilante group). archie then gets sucked into hiram’s world, with the lure of what i would call very male narrative motivations (this doesn’t mean these apply to men alone, but in fiction, are often seen as inherent traits for a male character to have) such protectiveness - over fred and veronica, power - over those who would seek to hurt fred and veronica. there was a point somewhere in the thousands of meta posts i’ve devoured in the last two days that fred getting shot makes him weak in archie’s eyes, and that hiram’s traditionally “powerful” persona becomes very attractive to him in the time following the fred incident.

have you ever heard of the theory of homosociality, anon?

the thing about the mafia, like i said before, is that it is a predominantly male business. the women, like hermione often cites in s2 to veronica, are supposed to stand behind their man as he makes his moves. the issue with hiram is the same issue that logan roy had in succession, which is that he had no acceptable male heir, so he does, again, what logan roy did: used his idiot son-in-law as a conduit for power. (idiot here used affectionately for archie, derogatory for tom wambsgans) what’s interesting to me is that hiram obviously prides himself on veronica having turned out to be such a cunning, self-sufficient young woman - and while this frustrates him as well, i have to believe that as some point he must’ve considered handing his empire over to her. but the fact remains that ultimately the mafia is a male business, and archie-and-veronica would’ve been a really odd, controlling couple because veronica would be running everything from behind archie’s stature. she does so, even, with nick st. clair and the speakeasy/casino side hustle in s2. she still has to rely on a man to pull the strings.

you know the riverdale genre theory? because of the way that hiram’s entire character is constructed around the mafia, and by extension, so is veronica’s relationship with archie, i think a lot of archie and hiram’s relationship has to specifically with their gender. think about it - none of the women on riverdale have such an intense relationship with the girls on the show who aren’t their daughters. even though alice HATES hermione and veronica, she doesn’t do anything more than forbid betty from being friends with veronica. mary doesn’t really interact with veronica the same way that hiram does with archie. gladys never even comes into meaningful contact with betty - for that matter, neither does hermione. all the girls have very complex minefield-esque relationships with their mothers, but none of the rivermoms ever reach out to the other daughters.

i would say on some level archie and hiram’s relationship cannot be replicated if they were female; say, for example, that hiram were to be woman, and still married to hermione; a lesbian mob boss would always be fighting her way into again, what is predominantly a male space. i don’t think she would’ve had the time to groom female!archie the same way into becoming her capo, because it wouldn’t supplement her position in the mafia to have more female capos. i believe if hiram were female, also, and veronica was still her daughter, there would be no focus on female archie (veronica’s gf in this scenario) and instead, veronica would have a very fraught, tense relationship with hiram instead, because hiram would be actively trying to groom her to take over the empire (?) instead of spoiling her and treating her as someone who would eventually marry into a different position of power. veronica would then fight hiram on all these things, because her girlfriend archie would be protesting against all the evil things that fem!hiram is doing, because fem!archie would be able to see it from the outside of the relationship. riverdale loves a mother-daughter struggle.

if, say, instead, this was a genderswap situation, where hermione is male and hiram is female, and veronica is male and archie is female, i believe nothing would really come of it either. again, fem!archie would be trying to convince veronica that male!hermione is evil, but male veronica would’ve been indoctrinated a long time ago. hiram being female and archie being female completely sap all the tension from their relationship, because all of a sudden fem!hiram would be using her cunning to ensure male!hermione stayed on top of everything, and fem!archie would be busy trying to ensure male!veronica wouldn’t succumb to the dark side. they would simply never interact! riverdale wouldn’t put them in the same room, even. it is possible i just lack imagination; but i just think the layers of repression and violence that form archie and hiram just don’t click in the same way if they were women. i don’t know.

(i do think, though, that fem!hiram would be a very possessive boymom over male!veronica. perhaps there’s something there? fem!hiram beefing with fem!archie over male!veronica’s attention? even so, riverdale, for all its female characters, doesn’t really do non-familial intergenerational interactions all that much. i have a jughead-meta reason for why this is, but that’s a story for a different time.)

[procrastinatorproject]

I just had a realization about why Agnes Jurati’s story in Star Trek: Picard season 2 feels so wrong to me, and I am going to inflict it on all of you!

Spoilers for the entirety of season 2 ahead! CW: Mention of depression, PTSD, anxiety, and emotional manipulation

Also: CW long post

(NB: I’m going to completely disregard the discrepancy in Agnes’s character between seasons 1 and 2. I think when you take Agnes’s story and development from the first season into account, her “arc” in season 2 falls apart completely. But for the sake of this argument, I’m going to meet the season 2 writers on their terms. I’m going to ignore the character of season 1 Agnes, and instead will simply look at season 2′s Jurati to explain why I think the story the writers gave her falls flat.)

I was taking notes for a way-too-long essay about my problems with PIC season 2 (which I may or may not write eventually), and I was trying to put into words why it always irks me when people say merging with the Borg Queen was a satisfying end to Jurati’s arc.

What I was never able to put my finger on until now is that when the Borg Queen and Jurati merge at the end of episode 9, that’s not actually the culmination of Jurati’s arc. It’s the Queen’s. All of the things that have frustrated me throughout season 2 about Jurati’s development are resolved for the Queen.

The writers tell us that Jurati is lonely, but they show us that she is surrounded by people who love her. This discrepancy is never addressed, neither in dialogue nor action nor thematic parallel. At no point does Jurati (or anyone else for that matter) acknowledge that this discrepancy exists. Because of this, we don’t really get to understand Jurati’s loneliness.

We don’t know if it was caused by anxiety, depression, and PTSD (very likely) or if it was caused by something else. We don’t know if she has tried to address it in some fashion and failed, or if she is convinced there can never be a way to feel less lonely. We never have an opportunity to think about different possible solutions to Jurati’s loneliness, because it’s never acknowledged that there could be solutions. At least none other than the one offered by the (manipulative, abusive) Borg Queen.

By contrast, we discuss the Borg Queen’s loneliness in some detail. Jurati points out that the Queen assimilates people because she feels lonely and needs connection. This longing and need for connection is part of her being, as it is for everyone else. Only the way the Borg Queen has gone about trying to mitigate her loneliness and fill the void at the core of her being is destructive and will never bring her the connection she craves.

We clearly know what is driving the Queen, what she has done to address this drive, why she failed, and what alternatives she could choose.

One advice you get over and over when writing stories is that a good, layered character has a Want and a Need. Picard wants to get everyone home and outwit Q, thus saving the universe. He needs to learn that he is not responsible for other people’s choices and deaths, so he can learn to love again. Seven wants to be human. She needs to learn that her unique way of existing is good enough.

To have a truly satisfying arc, your character has to engage with their Need and figure out what to do about it.

Jurati and the Queen both want roughly the same thing: They want connection and not to feel lonely anymore. (With a side of “wanting to save her friends” for Jurati.) The Borg Queen tries to accomplish this by assimilating people until she finally doesn’t feel lonely anymore. What she needs is to learn mercy, and understand that creating a mindless collective will never fill the void inside her.

But what does Jurati need? Throughout the season, I thought her arc might be about realizing that she is surrounded by people who love her and to accept their help. Except the writers never acknowledge that this is a thing she needs. A lot of people say what she needed was to accept the Transhumanist Solution to her loneliness: joining the Borg collective. Except that doesn’t really work, either, because Jurati never has a real choice about the matter.

Jurati allows the Borg Queen into her brain, first to get information from her, and then to save the French cop and make sure her friends still have a way to get home. She chooses this as the least worst of a number of very bad options. Then the Borg Queen takes control and Jurati occasionally manages to wrestle some of it back. Finally, when the Borg Queen has taken over Jurati’s body completely and is trying to use it to kill her friends, Jurati tries one last desperate move: With Seven dying at her feet and the rest of her friends soon to follow, she talks the Borg Queen into showing mercy. She convinces the Queen that they can build a better collective - and she sacrifices herself for it.

You can read this as Jurati choosing the Borg freely, but we get no indication that that’s the case. Nobody, at any point, offers an alternative for her. The option of de-assimilation doesn’t really come up so she could reject it and chose to stay Borg instead. The option of killing the Queen and herself is definitely never presented.

For the New Collective to feel like the culmination of Jurati’s arc, she would have had to make a choice. A real choice. And for her to make a choice, there would have had to be options. But we are never shown any options for Jurati.

The one who does have a choice is the Borg Queen. She has the option to kill Seven, take over Sirena, excise Jurati from her consciousness, and build a collective the same way she has done in countless other timelines. Or she can choose mercy. Save Seven, accept Jurati as a part of herself, let go of her idea of “strength” and embrace this new consensual(???) collective Jurati is offering her.

Jurati doesn’t really change or learn anything throughout season 2. She doesn’t learn to trust herself, she doesn’t learn how to deal with her loneliness, she doesn’t have some profound insight about the benefits of joining the Queen’s consensual Borg collective. She finds a way to convince the Borg Queen to stop killing her friends. The Queen is the one who grows and changes.

Out of all the characters this season, the Borg Queen might actually have the most clearly defined, straightforward arc with the most satisfying ending. Maybe Tallinn comes close, but my current impression is that the Queen takes the cake.

Jurati, on the other hand, doesn’t have a clear arc, let alone a fitting ending to it. We never find out which lesson she was supposed to take away from the events this season, she never gets to a place of self-actualization. Her role in season 2 is to prop up the Borg Queen’s (legacy) character arc.

There is a lot more to be said about this (while writing this, I realized that one of the reason’s Picard’s arc falls completely flat for me might be that his Want and Need are so utterly disconnected!). @curator-on-ao3 has pointed out that Raffi and Laris have the same problem as Agnes, where they are reduced to helping facilitate a legacy character’s development. And I would argue that even Seven falls into this category, because the season 1 version of Seven is overshadowed by legacy!Seven, i.e. instead of focusing on any of the aspects that constitute her character as we meet her in 2399, the story focuses on the same issue that was her defining characteristic throughout her tenure on Voyager.

But all that will have to wait until another time, this post is long enough as is.

I’d love to hear what all of you think about this! Is this a fair assessment of Jurati (i.e. season 2!Agnes) and the Borg Queen? Am I missing something crucial? I’ve only seen the season twice, and a few scenes more often to check what I’m ranting about is actually accurate, so there’s a chance some important bit of development did not register fully. Or does your reading of these two differ completely?

[queen-erika-the-songful]

I will probably re-do ALL of this thinking again later and make a proper chart but I just finished re-watching Dolphin Magic and have a lot to say about the Dreamhouse Adventures timeline, specifically how it fits in.

After re-watching Dreamhouse Adventures + Go Team Roberts and THEN watching Dolphin Magic, it really does just make more sense that DM came later in the timeline despite being released first and introducing this canon. Like I said in my last post about this, starting with the lesson of “you don’t have to question everything” (ep: “The Roof Fairy”), then transitioning into “mysterious things can just be mysterious (but also yes magic exists here)” (ep: “Magical Mermaid Mystery Part 1-4″), and THEN having the characters fully exposed to magical creatures in Dolphin Magic is a much more believable transition. If DM truly started this canon, then “The Roof Fairy” and especially “Magical Mermaid Mystery” do not make sense.

Putting Dolphin Magic later in the timeline also helps with the overall messiness of it. If Barbie is supposed to be in fact 17 during episode 1, “Welcome to the Dreamhouse”, which is confirmed in episode 4, “Nobody’s Cupcake”, then she must have JUST turned 17 during her last birthday, which is March 9th. We can also play around with this idea that her birthday in this series is different from her official birthday, so maybe she turned 17 at the start of that summer. For this idea, let’s just June 1st as her birthday. Either way, she’s 17 and Seasons 1-3 take place during summer. Then when GTR starts (Seasons 4&5 of DA), it’s still summer during “Magical Mermaid Mystery Part 1-4″. Then episode 5, “Sister Class Act”, comes around and Barbie starts a new school year. If she just turned 17, then this would either be her junior or senior year depending on her birthday and what age she was when she started school, which so far is unconfirmed. TV shows usually make a big deal about characters starting their senior year, so since there was no fanfare, I’m pretty sure its her junior year. I especially think that now since Barbie is spending an entire school year at the Handler Arts Academy during It Takes Two, which we know to be canon to DA’s continuity.

One more thing I have to mention is Barbie and Ken’s relationship. DA establishes them as neighbors who have grown up together since Barbie first moved to Malibu. The Roberts see him as family and he and Barbie are really close. Over the course of DA, we see them develop from “just friends” to “more than friends but not officially anything else”. They really like each other but neither will say it first. In the very last episode, “Dreamhouse Holidays”, Chelsea’s Christmas gift to Barbie & Ken is mistletoe. The episode ends with an ambiguous note from Barbie as to whether or not they actually kissed. We also have to keep in mind that "Curse of the Miner’s Ghost” from earlier in the season takes place at Spring Break, but if it’s still the same school year, then it would have to take place chronologically AFTER “Dreamhouse Holidays”. This would mean they didn’t progress in telling each other how they feel, but something is obviously there.

So, with all of this in mind, I have 3 ideas for where Dolphin Magic could place better in this timeline:

1 - Between Seasons 3&4 - This would have Barbie be introduced to magic the summer before her junior year and not interfere with the kiss or how their relationship develops.

2 - Between “Magical Mermaid Mystery” & “Sister Class Act” - This would again put the magic thing before the school year and not interfere with the Barbie & Ken development.

3 - After the school year of Seasons 4&5 - This would keep to the timeline of other stuff in DA as well as not clash too much with how DA+GTR transitions into Big City, Big Dreams and It Takes Two. It could take place during the very first week or two of summer, with Barbie’s time at the Handler Arts Academy coming right after. And if the Summer Program is for the entirety of June & July, then DM could take place during the very last weekend of May instead (some schools get out & start earlier than others here in the US, so it’s possible).

Or, we could go with the simpler idea: Dolphin Magic is just its own thing, as it should have been. We could also go the M*rv*l route and just say it’s part of a timeline that branches off into a separate continuity from what we have now with BCBG+ITT. The entire Barbie movie line has movies that may-or-may-not connect anyways, so maybe there’s just lots of timelines and timelines that branch off into other timelines and convoluted stuff like that.

I know I’m WAY overthinking this, but Mattel has been pretty adamant about staying in this specific canon the last 5 years, and it’s all pretty messy so I’m just trying to make it make a little more sense. I haven’t even tried incorporating Princess Adventure or Lost Birthday into this either!!

P.S. Also I was totally wrong about the resorts in DM and DA looking the same. They have similar layouts but much more different than I remember, especially inside the rooms.

P.P.S. Barbie’s age is not verified in BCBG and I believe not in ITT too so Barbie should be 18 now during this canon. But I find out that she’s still supposed to be 17 I will probably explode.

Again, going to re-do this whole post again later and use charts to figure this all out. I will wait until at least the second half of It Takes Two drops on Netflix. But I may also wait until the next two movies, Mermaid Power and Epic Road Trip come out too.

[kelluinox]

Well, I read snk 139. And regret it.

1) Soooo right off the bat we have Armin and his condescending patronizing. Why am I not surprised. Sure, let's blame Eren for being fucking idiots and demand that he apologize to a girl who molested his corpse. Eren should've kicked Armin more.

2) FINALLY Armin gets it. FINALLY. Intelligent character you say? Judging by how long it took him to realize what Eren was doing - I think not.

3) God I don't like this narrative of keeping your humanity. I really don't. Season 1 conveyed a completely different idea.

4) ........ Well there goes any respect I had for Isayama. Ymir was in love with Karl Fritz?!? Stockholm syndrome much?!? That is not a pure emotion!! What the fuck?!? There are so many things wrong with this, I can't even—

5) Wait does this confirm that Eren didn't know about that disgusting kiss?!? Now I feel even more sick. And seriously, seeing Mikasa force herself on a disembodied head convinced Ymir to abandon Fritz and cured her of her Stockholm Syndrome??? How???

6) So Eren did send Dina after his mom to put himself on a certain path to save Paradis? Damn, that's brutal and heartbreaking at the same time. Imagine having to sacrifice your own mother in order to save your people. My heart...

7) Okay, I will seriously fight Armin now. MIKASA ISN'T OWED SHIT AND NEITHER ARE YOU AFTER THE WAY YOU'VE TREATED EREN FOR THE ENTIRETY OF THIS MANGA. And just because Mikasa risked her life to save Eren's (although he never asked her to) he is under no obligation to return her feelings so fuck off. I swear to God Armin has to be one of the most hypocritical and unlikeable characters in SNK by now.

8) ......... Please tell me I'm hallucinating. Isayama don't do this to me. Don't ruin Eren this way, I'm begging you. Making him a lovesick possessive idiot?! Are you serious?!

9) IT'S FUCKING GRISHA! I KNEW IT! But I also can't feel happy because I'm hating this conversation so much. So thanks.

10) Finally Eren gets some fucking gratitude. But Armin will let this conversation go to waste. That much has already been shown.

11) Well, 138 was fucking pointless. Thanks for nothing, Isayama.

12) This is so cheesy and stupid I just can't help but laugh, oh my god. Who wrote these dialogues?? Everybody fucking crying and praising Eren? "What a man you are" PFFFFFT. This is so stupid it has become comedic.

13) And the promotion of unhealthy relationships continues as Annie embraces the man who abused her her entire life.

14) And here we have the survivors talking to the dead in a happy ending. Can this get any more cliche? Someone please kill me now. End my suffering.

15) Fuck Karina. She doesn't get to apologize or demand Reiner to stay with her. I know several abusive mothers and they all deserved to have their asses abandoned by their children. All of them. I've supported several friends with mother issues, I know what I'm talking about.

16) Can Mikasa stop touching Eren's head? If anyone has to carry him, let it be Armin. Stalker kasa is giving me the heebie-jeebies. I feel like I need to wash my hands every time I see her, I feel so dirty and disgusted.

17) And Marley are pointing their guns again. Siiigh. Why did the Alliance save these guys again?

18) What does it fucking matter?!?! Wasn't the entire point of your speech before the Alliance arrived that you were all equal?!?! Why the hell are you asking whether they're humans or titans, thus showcasing your continued racism?!?!

19) Like hell you did Armin. Although I suppose it does make sense that he would protect his psychotic friend by claiming her 'achievement' of killing Eren as his own. God knows, her mental health is bad already. If she gets attention for killing Eren she just might go on a beheading spree, kissing everyone she kills on the way.

20) Okay, Historia and her child are so cute. Gaaaah. Even though I so far hate everything about this, I'm saving this panel of Historia holding her little girl. I'm not made of stone. But also thanks for officially making Historia irrelevant after setting up so much.

21) Great. The Rumbling is pointless. Eldia is forming a military now. The survivors of the world probably will too. Nobody learned their fucking lesson and this endless fighting will continue. Just peachy.

22) My god everyone is a parody of themselves now. Tell me this entire chapter is a late April Fools' joke. Reiner lusting after Historia... Sure, he did that in Season 1, but it wasn't funny then and it isn't funny now.

23) Historia putting people who betrayed her country under protection... Wow. That's definitely what a good leader does. I guess if my country ever gets betrayed during a war, it should definitely forgive and protect the traitors that could've brought about its destruction. Totally.

24) Can Mikasa please get some medication already? Her psychosis is getting worse.

25) Eren is now a bird? Or at least controlling it from 'beyond the grave'? Symbolism has always flown over my head, I'll admit. And yes, I realize that this is also a callback to his promise after Hannes' death. But I guess this is confirmation that Mikasa will now live with that scarf around her neck, dreaming about Eren to the end of her days and never truly moving on. What a great character arc that is.

Maybe I'll rant about this chapter more later on, but these are my thoughts so far. I didn't expect anything good, but I'm somehow disappointed anyway, so I guess Isayama can consider that an achievement on his part.

[liliaeth]

Fix it’s for Teen Wolf

I can think of a few things that would have made Teen Wolf better.

1.  I wanted more focus on Scott’s emotional response to what happened to him.  I don’t mind that Scott isn’t the type who complains about getting hurt. The problem for me was that the show rarely dealt with the consequences of Scott’s pain, and thus to the casual viewer often made it look like he simply didn’t mind, that being hurt didn’t bother him at all. Or worse, that nothing all that bad had happened in the first place.

 Doing this undermined many of the hallucination scenes.  For example, in Season 2’s Party Guessed, we get hallucinations for Stiles, Jackson, and Allison which give us a view into psychology, letting us know their issues without spelling them out.  For Scott, we got Allison making out with kanima Jackson.   Compared to the others, it felt shallow and confusing.  The writers couldn’t even bother to give us dialog.  He received the same treatment in Season 5, when they read the book designed to trigger their memories about the Dread Doctors. Stiles gets yet another scene about his dead mother who has been crucial to his story since Season 1.  Lydia sees her grandmother and her connection to both Lydia’s powers and Eichen House, as well as foreshadowing her treatment at the hands of Valack.   Malia about her Mom and sister’s death at the hands of the Desert Wolf, which is her entire arc.  And Scott?  He gets a nightmare about a dog that was never mentioned before and would not be mentioned after.

 2. I wanted more focus on Scott’s trauma in general. In Season 1, Scott was repeatedly mentally and physically violated by Peter, terrorized and abused by Derek, and hunted by the Argents, and it was taken as a given.   Even the recaps at the beginning episodes in other seasons barely show any of that.  For example, Gerard attacking Scott in clear view at the hospital, stabbing him, and threatening his mother, never appeared in any of the recaps, even in episodes where it would have been important to remind the viewers about it.

While the show had no issue showing us over and over again how Stiles or Derek or Isaac or Allison or any white character really was hurt, they did not focus on the pain Scott was put through, and thus let the viewers conclude that those events didn’t matter.

The show literally had Scott try and kill himself, twice in less than two days, first in Frayed, by refusing to let himself heal, and then again in Motel California, yet neither of those suicide attempts are mentioned even once afterwards. And this while it would have been a good call back in s5b, when Scott is once again not letting himself heal after Theo killed him. and yet again, no mention whatsoever.

 3. I wanted more consequences for certain characters.   I liked that Scott and to a lesser extent Derek were confronted with the consequences of their actions. When they screwed up, they got called out on it. When they did something wrong, it wasn’t excused.  Then they made up for it.

In contrast, certain characters, especially Stiles, got to do whatever they wanted and it was either dismissed as funny or used to make them look sympathetic.  Stiles got to be mean and cruel, and the narrative still treated him as if he were the best friend ever.  He got to assault people, hurt them, and it was treated as if somehow he was the victim. 

For example, I would have liked Stiles a lot better, if when he tortured Scott with lacrosse balls, punishing him for who-knows-what, if someone else had called him out on it or if Scott had got to defend himself, instead of just taking it because Stiles was angry.  Scott allowing Stiles to hurt him to maintain their friendship was a pattern between them, just as much as Scott taking responsibility for things that aren’t his fault.  He keeps on doing it over the course of the show, but it would have been nice if the show at the very least had made it clear that that didn’t make Stiles behavior acceptable.

Just like I wish that Peter had actually faced consequences for his actions – and/or shown some kind of true remorse for his misdeeds--instead of the others just letting him hang around after all the horrible things he’d done or reduce it pettiness.

 4. I would have liked more time spent on Melissa and the McCall family in general, especially on Melissa’s initial reaction to Scott being a werewolf. In the show, they barely spent two minutes total on Melissa’s reaction to finding out her son has been turned into a werewolf.  By the end of s6b, she was barely even behaving like a mother anymore. Even to the point where we don’t even get a conversation between her and Chris about his attacks on her son before the two of them start dating.  Now don’t get me wrong, I liked Chris and Melissa in a relationship, but it was missed opportunity to humanize both her and Scott that they didn’t bother to show her finding out about that and her reaction to it.

Instead we got the whole horror reaction, of her being horrified at seeing her son’s other face, the reaction that any LGBT kid fears when they come out to their parent. Which could have been a great metaphor, especially if they had then made it clear that Scott was bisexual.

 5. I would have liked more focus on Boyd.   The production time spent on Isaac and Erica, while Boyd’s arc was treated as almost an afterthought. We barely even got any hint on his past, in the episode before they killed him off.    They started out with Boyd as the one who wanted to be like Scott, and then never explained it.  Why not focus more on that, and their relationship?

(similar complaints go about Mason, and how little we knew about Mason, outside of him being Liam’s friend. Like... what was his relationship like with his parents? What is Mason interested in, what does he want to do with his life... how did he deal with the after effects of the Beast...

 6. I would have liked more focus on Alan Deaton. The show had such huge potential with this character’s backstory, not just with the Hales but as an emissary in general.  There was this whole mythology about druids that they barely even delved into.

To not even start on how little we knew about his personal life? Why did he and his sister have different last names? What was their relationship like?

Does he have any romantic relationships? Friendships, relationships in general?

Or how about more time spent on his role as a father figure to Scott, we got so few crumbs of their relationship when we should have gotten so much more

 7. I would have liked more focus on Scott and Theo’s interaction in Season 6.   I get that in 6a, they had Scott primarily focused on getting Stiles back, but I’ll never understand why they then didn’t use 6b, to deal with the fact that Theo had tried to murder Scott and was trying to make it up to him and the pack for what he’d done to Scott and the others.

I don’t mind Theo interacting with Liam.  Those scenes were great, but they should have at least one scene with Scott and Theo dealing with the issues between them.  For Theo’s sake, as much as Scott’s.

 8. I would have liked a complete rework of Season 6A in its entirety.  If you’re going to focus a season on an actor who isn’t available, then you have to make it about his impact on the others. Show us what difference this character made, by showing us the effects of his absence, rather than just try and make it about a romantic ship. (I’ve written a post about this already in greater detail, so limiting it to that, but seriously, that season was such a huge wasted opportunity.)

 9.  Actual character growth for Stiles. For a character who had as much screentime as Stiles did, it’s shocking just how little character growth Stiles had over the course of the entire show. This contrasts in a really bad way, when you look at how much every single other character grew and changed over the course of the show.

Just look at the last four episodes of 5b, to give an example. After almost an entire season of watching Stiles at his worst, focusing on emotional scene after emotional scene with him, he suddenly got relegated to comic relief. Why? Because they didn’t want Stiles to grow, because unless he grew, there was no way for him to go but down. If Stiles had taken responsibility for his actions, then they’d have had to admit that he did wrong in the first place. And they couldn’t have that happen.

 10. And last but not least. More moments of the kids being kids. Even if it’s just proms and beach parties. Moments where we see the characters spend time together, when they aren’t trying to stop some bad guy. Where we can see them be friends, hang out with kids their own age. Even just to remind the audience just how young these children are. And where the viewers along with the characters can rest in between the horror, because doing so makes the horror hit far more strongly in contrast to the light.

 11. Also, a better lighting budget, pretty please Davies, were a few more light bulbs that much to ask for?

[stanharu]

I translated the short story Paru wrote for season 2 of beastars!

the opening theme for season 2 by Yoasobi is based on this story. It can be found on the beastars anime website under the “Music” tab. 

note: I believe this lil story takes place in the middle of chapter 61. Right after Legosi is first attacked by Tem’s killer and before he goes to see Gouhin in the back alley market.

The title is “Press Your Ears Against Your Chest”

Press Your Ears Against Your Chest By Paru Itagaki

“A small animal’s heartbeat can make their body shake uncontrollably.” One day, she blurted out this small, everyday grievance. Does that mean she can feel her own heart reverberate in her chest? As a large-sized carnivore, it's hard for me to imagine, so I feel like my reply at the time was awfully vague. But even as I gave that vague reply, I couldn't take my eyes off her uneasy profile. She's a very small dwarf rabbit, but my memories of her are always close-ups of her face. Her expressions are etched into my mind, as if they were developed into a large photograph.

— Next stop, Wasedon, Wasedon. — I can see my fur rise and fall with the shaky movements of the train. I remember her words. I am neither small nor a species delicate enough to have their body shake from their own heartbeat, but I felt like I understood a little the reason for her expression at that time. Right now I feel as if I've been swallowed whole by a large monster called a train, whose heartbeat jostles my body around. I ignored my friend's warning, ran away from campus, and now. A surprise attack from Tem's killer has left my body battered. Just who is Tem's killer? Will I be able to expose them? When I'm completely beaten and bruised like this? I appeared to be too unreliable, and more frail than any small animal. My fur sways. This route has lots of curves, the train shakes relentlessly too. Together with my uneasiness, the gray fur growing from my arms sways like a meadow of grass blown by a strong wind. I'm anxious. A beast's fur is an easy-to-understand reflection of their condition or mental state. What kind of feelings does a small animal, whose body shakes from their own heartbeat, live with from the day they're born? It must be hard to get involved with a wide variety of species while feeling such instability. 

— Next stop, Indobashi, Indobashi — I want herbivores to live with less anxiety, even if it's just a little. If possible, I'd like herbivores to go to sleep every night with peace of mind, without having to worry about their lives being threatened. For that reason, I have to capture the killer lurking around campus. I have to defeat them. Before I realized it, I had gotten off the train.

The percentage of carnivores that get off at this station is unnaturally high. It's the closest station to the back alley market after all. That marketplace where herbivore meat is sold illegally. Carnivores walk along the station platform, their large, muscular bodies swaying about. Wearing business suits, or a college student's casual clothes, they all may be dressed differently, but they likely all have the same goal. They're just walking along the station platform, but everyone's footsteps sound oddly energetic. Burly tails are wagging. Fangs poke out from raspy breaths. From the perspective of herbivores who have departed at this station for another purpose, this must look like a terrifying procession.  I too am a member of this procession. Just why did I get off at this station? Am I also headed toward the back alley market? If my feet are instinctively taking me there in the pursuit of peace, then I am not much different from these carnivores headed to the back alley market to eat meat.  My pace quickens. I run full speed up the stairs, trying to get out of the ticket gates before anyone else. Is it to escape the pack of carnivores heading to the back alley market? Is it to prove that I'm different from them? Is it to display my physical strength? I can hear the sound of the gray fur around my ears flowing against the wind. My breathing becomes ragged. I leave the ticket gates, and enter the bright outside world. 

With my hands on my knees, I catch my breath. I think it's been a long time since I ran at full speed. As I stare at the ground and breathe deeply, I feel my body shake with a strange tempo. Is this it? I clutched my chest with my hand, and felt the intensity of my own (complaining) heart.  “A small animal’s heartbeat can make their body shake uncontrollably.” It's proof that you're living life to the fullest, Haru-chan. You're always so radiant because you're living while constantly sensing your own heartbeat. I'm just a big, dull wolf, so I can't feel my own heart unless I work my body to this extent. It's hard to figure out the right decision I should make. I'm not strong like you. Even under such restraint, I'm surprised at the assertiveness of my own life force. My body is telling me it's time to move. 

I'll go to the back alley market. There lies a carnivore's true nature. In its entirety. I'm sure to find something there.  With a heartbeat to match hers in my chest, I faced forward and walked on. Alongside the pack of carnivores going to eat herbivores. So that I can protect herbivores. 

[evakuality]

Mia, episode seven

Sorry, don’t read this if you like Mia.  I am not a fan of hers in this episode.

1.  Ugh.  I do not like that there is no recognition here of the conversation with Kiki.  I don’t get it - if you’re going to have that conversation and make it feel like a wrench for Mia to ‘give up’ Alex, why not address it properly?  Even if this comes up again later, I dislike that when she arrived there was no discussion about the Kiki thing, and now it’s all about sex with no recognition that she is now literally lying and going behind Kiki’s back.  Worse, it was Mia who told Kiki she would do whatever it took to keep her friendship, so she lied about that too.  I’m really disappointed in where this went.  She didn’t have to tell Kiki she would give Alex up - they were having a really honest conversation and she could just have said ‘I fell for him even though I know I shouldn’t’ and I don’t understand why they made that choice.  I don’t remember the og on this at all so I don’t know if they got it from there, but even if it is in there, they could have chosen to not have Mia deliberately and specifically lie to Kiki’s face and then act like she has no compunction about it at all.

2.  Okay so they’re finally talking about Kiki, but Mia dismisses that with ‘it’s not about Kiki’ and ‘I already talked to her’?  When that conversation literally ended differently, and now she’s lying to both Alex and Kiki?  Yeah, this isn’t doing it for me at all.  And to think, I actually did like Mia before this.  But the end of the last episode and the start of this one has really revised my feelings on her.  It’s not just Alex who’s being a dick in this situation.  I also don’t like that we’re supposed to be feeling sorry for Alex here because he has ‘problems with his parents’.  I know, assuming this is like the og, that there is a deeper thing here with the sister, but even so.  How on earth can they have a relationship when it’s based on lies and hating each other’s family circumstances?  I still don’t understand what they see in each other.  If it’s only sex, then there are SO many more people out there and nothing so far has sold me that either of them genuinely likes the other as a person.

3.  And yet another clip with Mia knowing she’s being an asshole and choosing not to address it.  I know she has this need to be in control and I know she’s doing something that’s for her for once and that’s probably both exhilarating and scary, but ugh.  The amount of lies is really building up.  Most of the other couples in our little world have communication issues etc, and many are hiding things, but actually lying on purpose like this isn’t as common and Mia is just casually throwing them out there like it’s easy.  Also ‘why me?’ ‘because you know who I am’ - ummmm, no she doesn’t Alex.  You’re literally hiding stuff from her as well!!  Unless you mean, she knows you’re an asshole and gives you the time of day anyway?  Plus, it’s not believable - Alex clearly started stalking/pursuing/gaslighting her well before she showed that she ‘knew’ him.    Like it’s nice that they’re trying to ‘communicate’ here, but if they’re just going to keep lying it’s not actually going to help.

4.  I get what they’re going for with this little bubble the two of them are in.  But Mia literally is avoiding her life and the more time she spends not connecting with her friends, the more likely they are to be concerned.  This bubble can’t last and I dislike that this whole thing is built on such a fragile and unbelievable base for them as they pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist.  It’s strange that I’m okay with it with Matteo and David and their fake vs real thing, but I think it’s because the issues are different and there were no specific promises to other people not to connect.  Keeping things private is different from lying outright.  Plus, neither Matteo nor David was an actual asshole and I still don’t believe that Alex isn’t the guy he showed through 1.5 seasons, and the one who was so awful to Kiki.  

5.  And of course, as expected, Kiki finds out when she’s trying to do something nice for Mia.  And of course she’s now more hurt than she was before.  So, now Mia thinks ‘I can’t do this to Kiki’?  Not a few days ago when Kiki was vulnerable and open with her?  No, it has to be now after she made things 500% worse.  It’s funny - I don’t usually find myself in a situation where I dislike the PoV character in these shows.  But here I am.  I actually dislike Mia in this episode.  I can usually get where a character is coming from even when I can see them totally stuffing up, but here she’s made conscious and deliberate choices and I don’t have any sympathy that they’ve come back to bite her.  I usually have some sympathy for the struggles, but not today.

6.  I know, from things that I’ve seen around, what this bunch of all-caps texts from Alex are about.  But again, Mia has no reason to know and respond the way she does.  It might have helped if we knew ahead of time what is going on with him, even if it was mentioned casually before maybe.  But instead, we have her jumping to her feet and rushing off to him for no real reason.  This is, again, the big problem Druck always has - pacing and making the story beats believable as an entirety rather than as discrete clips.  Even looking at the time for this episode - we had the entire build up and destruction of their relationship within the space of half an episode and now less than a minute later it’s all back on because of this panic attack.  It’s too fast, no time to breathe.  Skam and its offshoots always work best when things are allowed to develop organically and at a pace that isn’t this rushed.  The clip format is half to blame for this, but even with that it should be possible to develop this whole thing at an easier pace that builds tension and makes sense.

7.  Pacing, pacing, pacing.  Ugh.  Just this episode Mia explained why she’s not ready for sex, and now when Alex is or has been in a vulnerable state, she’s all ‘hey you know what would be a great idea?  Sex’  Why does all this stuff all have to be in one episode?  Why did we need so much of Alex being an asshole at the start of the season only to cram so much of the important relationship development stuff into one short episode?  I know they had to cut it down from the og (thank goodness, that one was far too long), but there are ways they could have done it while letting all these plotpoints breathe a bit.  It’s too crammed into one episode when it didn’t have to be.

8.  Yes Hanna, express this stuff for me: ‘all this happened in the last 3 days?’ Exactly.  Also this scene proves once again why Mia and Hanna should be a thing.  They have real, genuine conversations in which no-one ends up feeling belittled.  And they have great chemistry.  Seriously, Mia should have looked in this direction.  But honestly, in terms of pacing, Kiki finding out at the end of this episode and then this whole part being the focus of the next one would work better.  This whole business with Carlos is cute and all, and his advice is actually pretty decent, but again it’s all so rushed.  Again, I know this was released clip by clip and so the format is a bit different, but it should probably also work in an episodic format.  I feel like I’ve lived 3 episodes all in one go and now we have the other girls showing up and being disapproving as well; it’s too much.

9.  I don’t like that two episodes in a row (and after such a LOT in this one) we have a ‘Mia trying to be open with Kiki’ scene.  This excuse ‘I wanted to protect you’ is unkind and we already saw on more than one occasion how Mia protecting Kiki was a bad thing for Mia.  Also ‘I didn’t understand that it’s something serious between Alex and me’ is such a huge problem for me.  She literally lied to Kiki’s face and then went to Alex immediately afterwards.  So either she did know how serious it was or she didn’t really care that much and didn’t need to go back to him at all.  This is so frustrating because we’re supposed to accept all of this at face value when actually on any sort of consideration it doesn’t hold up.  So even though Kiki’s little speech is really good and does highlight all the issues I have with Mia, unfortunately a) I already disliked her because of it and b) because it’s all so rushed, I don’t care about any of it.  Except Kiki.  Which, considering how awful and racist etc she has been is a huge feat.  And effectively, Kiki has moved herself aside and allowed Mia to have Alex if she wants.  All of this in one episode!  

Basically I did not enjoy this episode, there was too much crammed into it (I have this same issue with some of Nora’s in s5, and it is one of the biggest issues I often have with Druck compared to the og) and so while Kiki’s speech should have been a turning point allowing us to see a way into Mia’s future, I am actually left disliking our main character and not all that inclined to watch the rest of the season.  

[67impalaandwhisky]

Destiny Is Heaven Sent

Summary: Knowing Dean Winchester since you were fifteen, you’ve always been pulled in his direction. Always wanting to open up the rattled and broken cage your heart lives in. But when the child you’ve been raising together dies, you find yourself closing up the cage of your heart again. And if destiny has one thing for you, it’s to break you down before bringing you back up.

Characters: Dean x You, Sam, Castiel, Bobby, OFC’s, OMC’s, (Ongoing)

This Series Is Set Through Seasons 1-6 With Knowledge That The Bunker Exists

Rating: 18+

Warnings (Ongoing and Will Be Updated): Grieving, Mentions of Rape and Defilement (As Per A Case), Show Level Violence, Swearing, Smut, Impreg Kink, Blood, Fighting, Drinking, Dean Being Dean, Fluff, Angst, Dom!Dean, Sub!Reader

Warnings For This Chapter: Grieving Over Dead OMC, Drinking, Swearing, Flirting

A/N: This is my first Supernatural fic ever! I’ve been writing for a while and have adored Supernatural since the beginning so I’m really excited for this series and I hope everyone enjoys it!

Chapter 2.

"Good morning!" Dean yells out as he unlocks the motel room door. 

To his surprise, neither his brother nor you were there to greet him. 

He furrows his eyebrows before looking at what should be his bed to see the sheets wrinkled and messed up. He was happy that you slept in his bed and not in Sam's like you've done throughout all these years.

He knows you would never get intimate with his brother, but he can't help the heart wrenching curiosity of it all. He shouldn't have slept with that girl last night, but he did to ease his pain. 

You both handle your grief differently and yet, it's the same.

He finds women to distract him, he makes offensive jokes to cover his cowardly self. He does all the things an asshole would do to stop the pain from spreading through his limbs and to his heart.

You barrel your anger towards anything and anyone. You completely shield yourself from the world like everything will hurt you, because it does. You drink the pain away until you're numb with relief. 

Two ways of dealing. Both disappointing to one another.

He lays down on the bed, grabbing the pillow and pressing it to his face as he sighs.

The smell of lavender and oak invade his senses. It was so you. It was home. 

He lets out a groan before flipping on his back and staring up at the water stained ceiling. 

You pretend to never love anything. Never give a fuck about a single thing. But, one thing you did love was Marsh. And, you weren't afraid to show it.

You would baby him and hold him like he tethered you to the planet because he probably did. 

He turned you all into a closer family then you were before. He made things domestic in the bunker. 

He made Dean feel like he finally had a chance. You felt like his wife, someone who he would bicker with and laugh with. Someone who discussed their son's attitude and his problems.

You were like his life partner. Until that fateful day.

"Good job, baby." You say sweetly as Marsh puts the gun down on the table.

Dean steps over, inspecting the shooting range sheet. 

"Hey dad?" The puberty cracking the young boy's voice makes his adopted father smirk as he pulls the sheet off of it's holder.

"Yeah bud?" He asks as he walks back over. 

His eyes catch a glimpse of the woman he's known for years as she combs her fingers through the soft brunette locks of the young boy in their care. 

She loved him so dearly. Finally having someone to care for. 

"Uncle Sammy said he found an easy job and I wanna help...Can I come with you, mom and Uncle Sammy?" He looks over at you and there's an unspoken conversation just with your eyes.

He's getting older and he wants to do this. He wants this life. He wants to prove himself. Dean can see his willpower and his need to grow up. 

When his father was younger, John treated him and Sam like recruits rather than his children. Dean chose to take it a different way, letting Marsh decide when he was ready and he says he's ready now.

They have to respect this.

"Sure you can, baby." You whisper before kissing his forehead and smiling at him.

"Hello Dean." The voice rips him from his memories and he sits up quickly with his hand over his heart.

"Goddammit! What do you want, Cas?" He barks out as he lays back down on the bed.

He hugs the pillow tightly to his body as the angel sits down on Sam's bed.

"I would like you to fall in love with Y/N." Cas says as he puts his hands on his knees calmly.

He lets out a sharp laugh before throwing the pillow at Castiel.

"Not this again!" He says as Cas gently places the pillow on his lap.

"You must do this Dean. You must make a child with her. It's your destiny." Dean sits up quickly, frustration starting to seep into his bones as he points at his friend.

"You don't get to sit there and tell me about destiny. You hear me? You telling me that I'm supposed to fall in love with her makes me hate the fucking idea. That we're supposed to get pregnant and have a kid? For what? So they-they could be a vessel just in case something wants to come crawling back and inhabit my kid? No thanks!" His voice is sharp and agitated as he walks over to the small fridge and grabs a beer.

It's five o'clock somewhere.

"I know this is...difficult for you to understand but-"

"God-fucking-dammit Castiel. It's not difficult at all to understand! I've known Y/N since I'm fifteen years old. I've loved her from the moment I saw her. I raised a kid with her. And you know what I can't do?! I can't show her how much I love her or be with her because of this stupid destiny crap." He says before chugging his beer and slamming the bottle down on the table.

There's silence in the motel room for a while. Closing his eyes, he knows Cas is still there. He didn't hear wings flutter and he can practically feel his gaze burning through his skin to his heart.

"Yes. I understand." Cas says quietly.

"No. You don't." Dean says simply before putting his hands over his face and sighing.

"You might see how I feel. You might be able to get a glimpse of it in my mind but you don't know a damn thing about what goes through my head. I thought I had something good. Was working up to something great with her. And then Marsh died and she's right back to how she was when we first met. When we were fifteen. You don't know how destroyed I am." He says finitely, waving his hand as if to tell his friend to just stop talking.

Dean opens his eyes to the empty room before scoffing loudly. The tip of his tongue laps over his bottom lip as he leans back against the counter. 

You are his everything and his nothing all at once. 

Picking up the beer bottle, he flings it across the room only to watch the brown glass shatter into small pieces.

"Hi, I'm Agent Simmons and this is Agent Thayer we're with the FBI." You say, holding up the badge to the coroner.

"Great, thanks for coming KISS but I already told everything to the sheriff. If you didn't read the report." The older man says as he gives a short glance to your badges.

"Right. No of course, but we're looking into it because the case is so odd. So if you could just tell us what you told the sheriff. We would appreciate it." Sam says as you walk along the corridor. 

"Well you got that right, kid. Odd isn't even the word. Try freaky." He says as he pulls open one of the smaller doors that line the wall.

You can smell bleach along with the underlying scent of decay. Grimacing you focus on the covered body as it rolls out of the wall unit. 

This was never the most fun job but it beats waiting at the motel for Sam to get back, or worse. Dean.

You couldn't help but be bitter that he didn't show back up last night. Too deep into the pussy that he got last night to even think of you.

Even though there's no reason why he should think of you.

You weren't together. You've never been together.

He made that clear when you both were seventeen. He could see how comfortable you were with him. Flirting and giggling all the while as you helped his father out with jobs.

John encouraged canoodling between you two, honestly. And you think it put Dean off. Or maybe it was just you in your entirety that he was putting off.

He would only flirt and tease playfully when he was drunk. And, as you got older and went out to bars you noticed that he did it with everyone. But, you were comforted when he laid it on thicker with them. Almost like he could just be himself around you.

"So what are we looking at here?" Sam mumbles as he grimaces.

You put your hand over your mouth, happy for the distraction even though this is so fucked up, as the sheet is taken off her body.

"We had to vacuum out her insides. It was all mush. But her kidneys were intact which was odd. And this." Spreading the girls legs, you can see black, thick goo shining like oil on her thighs.

"Haven't gotten the test results back yet on what exactly this stuff is." Swallowing uncomfortably, you look away before shivering.

"Got it." Sam whispers and you can practically hear the gag in his voice.

"I hope you catch the son of a bitch. Or at least make out heads or tails of what's going on." The coroner says covering up the body.

"Jesus." You whisper before closing your eyes.

"Thank you. We'll see ourselves out." He says before putting his hand on the small of your back and walking you out of the room.

"Absolutely disgusting." You say to him as he undoes his tie, weaving through people in the hallway before ending up back next to you.

"What is going on? I've never seen that before." He says dumbfounded. 

"What ghost has the mojo to do that? Ectoplasm cum? That's just insane." You say as you both shove the doors open.

"Hey Y/N...do you wanna talk?" Sam asks as he makes his way towards your car.

You stop in your tracks before tilting your head.

"What Dean did last night… It wasn't right of him. And, I know you must be feeli-"

"Keep it to yourself kid. I'm as fresh as a daisy." You cut him off as you unlock your car.

"Yeah… Okay… Right. I just-- I'm here to talk to you always, you're my best friend y'know?" Sam says gently as he climbs into the car with you.

"I know Sammy." You mumble as the engine purrs to life.

Too bad there's nothing to talk about.

Ending up back at the motel. You shove the door open to Dean and some random chick as she sits on his lap.

Your jaw clicks and you throw his bag of food beside him before walking over to the fridge and grabbing a beer.

"Hey Y/N. This is Candy." You scoff in disbelief and your heart clenches as you press the bottle cap lid above the corner of the table. 

Slamming your hand down, the cap pops off easily and you give a fake, terse smirk to the girl as she waves.

There was a time when Dean called you 'Candy girl' for a completely different reason. It was a pet name you cherished but now you think it's sickening.

"Candy girl!" Dean calls to you as you put your rifle back together. 

You look up, one eye squinting from the blazing sun as he holds out a chocolate bar.

"Oh man! I love Twix." You say grabbing it from his hand. 

"I know. That's why I got it for you." He says as if it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"This is why you call me Candy girl?" You ask lightheartedly as you rip open the packaging.

He pushes the hood of Baby up before turning his head slowly to you.

"No. I call you Candy girl because you're the sweetest woman in my life. God. You moron." He mutters before burying himself inside the front of his car.

"Get out." You tell her as Sam enters the room.

His eyes go wide and he looks at you quickly before swallowing thickly.

"Oh Y/N. Come on…" Dean whispers at the fierceness of your voice.

You look at him expectantly before chugging your beer and wiping at your mouth with your thumb. 

"Dean Abel." You mutter as you grab another beer.

"Okay, sweetheart. You heard the boss. No fun for me today." He says as he runs his hands over her arms. 

You are so grateful he has never uttered the word sweetheart to you.

It makes you feel as if you're a smidgeon different then all the other women he's ever known.

You don't watch as she leaves but you can hear her heels clicking and you can see Sam move out of the way out of the corner of your eye.

You take in the broken glass by the bathroom before shaking your head slightly.

"Why don't you do some fucking work or something?" You ask him as the door gets swung shut.

"I was doing work. Apparently our dead girl was a prostitute that worked with Candy." You hum to him before leaning back against the counter.

"So that's what you do now? You pay for it? Last night you seemed to like getting it for free." You mumble as you grab another beer. 

Sam flinches while Dean raises his eyebrows towards the heavens.

"Got something to say to me, Candy girl?" Dean asks with a laugh.

That's it.

"Y/N!" Sam screams as you charge at his brother. 

The bottle of beer smashes onto the floor, your feet stepping into the puddle of hops and suds as you ball up your fist.

"Bring it on." The oldest whispers as he clenches his jaw.

"STOP IT!" Sam bellows as he wraps his arms around you.

You struggle against his vice grip, your tongue running over your teeth as you smile at your best friend. 

"Can't you see how horrible you're being to each other? Beating each other up and taking your guilt about Marsh's death out on one another?!" The younger brother asks as he throws you down onto the bed.

"Sam. Don't." The authority in Dean's voice makes you swallow nervously.

"I miss him too, Dean. We all miss him. But you can't keep beating yourselves up like this. You can't keep treating each other like shit when it's not your fault he died. He wanted to go with us!" His voice cracks as he puts his hands down to his sides dejectedly.

"I said don't!" His brother barks out before looking at you.

You didn't even realize you were crying until now. You press your fingers to your cheek, gathering a tear as it falls before scoffing and wiping your face.

"Fuck this." You whisper as you stand up.

"Where are you going?!" You hear the oldest call to you as you walk to the door.

"Away from you." You mumble as you tug the door open harshly.

Dean sits in complete silence. 

He's been this way for an hour. He usually cleans guns when he thinks, or drinks. But, he can't bring himself to do anything. He just wants to crawl into a hole and stay there for all eternity.

You're so closed off. So gated from this reality now. It's breaking his goddamn heart. 

God knows what you were up to. 

Fights between you both is always bad. But there's never an underlying tone of hate. 

He could hear the venom rolling off your tongue like it was nothing.

He could feel the angst that was vibrating throughout your body so clearly. 

And, he just goaded you on. Because, that's what he's always done. But he shouldn't have. 

"Dean?" It's a mere whisper in the dark room.

"Yeah." He whispers back, a choked voice echoing throughout the room.

"Aren't you going after her?" Sam asks quietly as he lays down in bed.

"No Sammy. She doesn't want me to." He looks down at his calloused hands before biting his bottom lip and lowering his head.

"Yes she does. You know that. She doesn't even know that she wants you to. But you do." His younger brother replies.

"I can't go to her Sam. I can't let myself fall into this trap. Her hating me is better than nothing. Then she can't love me." 

"You're an idiot. She loves you regardless. Whether she's going to admit it to herself or not. This whole destiny thing is bullshit. So what if you guys have a kid? Doesn't mean it has to say yes to being a vessel." Dean clicks his teeth at his brother's words before carding his fingers through his hair.

"For now you have to go make sure she's okay. You have to take care of her. She's hurting so deeply." 

He mulls it over for a minute or two.

He's worried sick already. He just has to go. Even if it's wrong to give in, it's right to take care of her. Always.

Standing up, he grabs his jacket and his car keys.

"She'll be somewhere fancy since she wants to get rid of you." His brother says as he walks towards the door.

"Bitch."

"Jerk." Sam mutters as he rolls over in his bed.

"Just put down the fucking bottle." You mutter to the bartender.

"Ma'am this is a two hundred dollar bottle of whisky." The bartender says as he looks over your appearance.

"Did I stutter?" You ask annoyed, handing him the money.

As he sets down the bottle, you put your hand under your chin before huffing out.

This whole thing with Dean. This whole battling each other with mean words and fisticuffs is so exhausting.

When Marsh was around you never really fought. You had tiffs and even those ended with light hearted slaps. These fights, they're big. And, they take an even bigger toll on your mental health.

Yes, you're pushing away the one man who makes you happy.

Yes, you're closing yourself off again just like when you were a teenager.

Yes, you're completely ignoring reason for the hatred you feel in your gut.

But of course, you couldn't hate Dean Winchester. Quite the opposite.

And, that's what makes your stomach churn at night.

That's what makes everything a bitch.

He started it first. A few days after Marsh's death-- the whole push Y/N away until she wants to claw her own eyes out task.

And, he is doing a great job at it.

You're not letting him in and he's pushing you to the edge of not even wanting to get back to a place you're comfortable with him.

But, why?

Why is he pushing you to the edge like this? Why do you even fucking care?

"Can I get an extra glass over here, sweetheart?" You hear a deep voice ask and you let out a low whine as you cover your eyes with your hand.

Great. Just fucking fantastic.

A chair scrapes loudly across the linoleum flooring before you feel his big, rough hand on your bare thigh beneath your ripped jeans.

You shiver at his touch before turning your head to him and peeking through your fingers.

"I know you better than you know yourself." He says before winking at the girl as she sets down the glass.

You watch her blush and you grimace at the interaction before slinging back the shot.

"You bought the whole bottle, Mel Gibson?" He asks as he pours himself a shot.

"Go away. Please." You whisper before putting your hand below your chin again.

"Nah. I'll help you finish it. Come on. Let's go to the booth." He says, jabbing his finger to the other side of the bar.

"Why? What's the point? Hey, Carrie. Wanna distract this guy for me?" You ask the bartender and she perks up at the thought.

Typical.

"No thanks. I'm with my wife." He says before grabbing the bottle and your wrist.

You snort at his comment before whining as you get dragged off to the booth like he asked.

"You shouldn't lie to women like that Mr. Winchester. They might think you're not chivalrous." You jeer as you slide into the booth.

"Ha. Ha. You're hilarious. Shut up." He deadpans as he squeezes in beside you.

He was so close you could smell him again. You could smell home.

You push yourself away from him before grabbing your glass and shaking it asking for more.

Looking up at him, you find his deep green eyes staring at you and it makes you feel like a deer in headlights for once. They were so riddled with emotion. Emotion so far beyond anything you've seen for quite some time now.

He pours you some whisky before leaning back in the booth and sighing heavily.

You just stare at each other for a while. Both of you drink one another in, but you break the line of sight first.

You take a large gulp of the alcohol before cringing. The burn is soothing to the flaming fires in your gut.

"I'm sorry. I've been pushing you when you don't deserve it. I've been angry at the whole world." He says finally.

His voice is laced with sorrow and your heart pangs.

"I don't need your sorry." You retort before pouring yourself some more whisky.

"Hey… Hey-" He whispers softly as he holds his hands up, "-I'm not trying to fight with you. I'm not trying to create a rift between us. I'm opening up." 

You grumble gently. You wish he just fucking wouldn't. It's always such a blessing and a curse to see him like this.

He pours his heart out and you have the overwhelming emotion to do the same.

"I'm sorry too." You whisper back before finishing off the glass.

"We both handle things so wrong when we're upset. Sam says it's because we're almost like the same person and I think I'm starting to believe it." He says before chuckling.

You begin to count the freckles on his face again, like you once did many moons ago.

He's so perfectly not yours.

So perfectly Dean.

The silence this time is easier. It's almost welcome. 

"I shouldn't have slept with that girl last night. That's on me." He mutters above the lip of his glass.

You tilt your head before snorting, "We aren't together. You don't have to apologize to me. We've never been together."

"No! I know!-" He says quickly, "-But still that doesn't mean it was right. I just wish...I just wish things could be like before. When Marsh was around...there was no sorrow or no anger." 

You sigh before putting your hands over your face.

"Yeah. I know. But he isn't here anymore and we all deal with it in our own way." You pour some more alcohol.

"Yeah we do...But, I want you to lean on me more. I want you to trust me with your thoughts like you used to. Like when you cried when you killed your first wraith." 

You begin to smile at the memory before rolling your eyes.

"I was crying because I literally felt like I was going insane." You deadpan earning a chuckle from him.

This is easy too. Falling back into routine.

The cage you've locked yourself away in these past weeks is slowly opening again and it's a terrifying notion.

"Or the time when you got abducted by the djinn and you told me to leave you there. Because you loved your dream so much." He says and you smirk in response.

"Nothing like a djinn twisting my mind into having four babies with you and you being my husband." You say raising your glass before downing it all.

He swallows thickly and looks away before clearing his throat.

"We almost had that. Hurts that we can't have that." He mumbles before pouring a tall glass for himself.

"We aren't meant to be. You know that. You fucking told me that." You say as you throw your boots over his lap.

He looks down at your boots and you can't quite read the emotion in his eyes as he begins to play with your laces.

He lets out a small laugh before shutting his eyes and nodding.

"Would you? If we were meant to be? Would you be with me?" He asks before looking back up at you.

He's never asked you that before. You stammer on syllables before putting your hands through your hair.

"I don't… I don't know." You say truthfully and you see him nod rapidly before swallowing.

"What if it was our destiny to be together? What if we were made for one another?" His voice is feeble now. 

You click your teeth before slumping down in the booth.

"I can't tell you an answer because it's not true." You say finitely. 

He hums in agreement before looking away.

"Yeah… You're right." 

"Come on you lazy drunk." Dean groans out as he pulls you out of the car.

You stagger on your feet as you fall into his chest.

"Dean Abel." You slur out as he closes the door with his foot.

"Yeah. Yeah. I got you, princess." He murmurs as he scoops you up into his arms.

"I bought a room. Five." You say holding out the key with a large smile.

He shakes his head with a smirk as he walks down the strip of concrete of the motel.

"Why'd you do that?" He asks as he takes it, pulling the key loop onto his finger.

"To get away from you." You reply as you bury your face into his neck.

"Oh...Joy." He mumbles as he approaches the room. 

Opening the door, he makes quick steps to the bed before gently laying you down.

"Okay. He-Here I am, Dean. One of your sweethearts. Strip me!" You whisper as you hold your arms up. 

He smirks as he shakes his head before rolling his eyes.

"You're a fucking psycho." He mutters before helping you out of your jacket.

He takes in your slightly parted lips, your cheeks that are tinged pink from the alcohol that pumps through your veins.

He sighs gently as he takes off your shirt.

His eyes drift anywhere but your body as he discards your shirt elsewhere.

"Take your pants off." He instructs as he takes off his jacket.

"No. You take 'em off." You mumble as you close your eyes.

Grumbling to himself, he rolls his eyes before pulling your pants off of your legs in one quick swipe.

"Now go to bed and don't throw up." He says as he tosses your pants onto the couch.

Your head as heavy as it is still lifts off of the pillow as you look at him, seeing double but two Dean's are better than none.

"Sleep with me." You whine patting the spot behind you.

He hums to you, an unsure noise before sighing and taking off his shirt.

Your eyes rake over his toned chest and stomach, defined just enough to see small abs beneath his soft looking skin. You can see the freckles that fleck and dot his chest and shoulders as he walks over to the bed.

"I ain't takin' my pants off. You pervert. Go to bed." He mumbles as he lays down beside you.

You smirk before pressing your head into the pillow. 

"I think I would…" You find yourself saying as you close your eyes.

"You would take my pants off?" He asks loudly, his voice riddled with surprise as he wraps his arm around your body.

"If it was destiny and we were meant to be I think I would be with you." You say as he presses his chest to your back.

"Shut up and go to sleep." He murmurs as his forehead connects to the back of your neck.

"You don't know what you're asking for." He whispers as he closes his eyes.

Forever Dean Tags: @akshi8278​

[curestardust]

if you want: to suffer immensely (if you care about TPN) or to be bored (if you don’t)

S01 (x)

You want to see how to butcher one of the most intriguing anime set-ups and end up with something that looks like it came from a no-name studio with $10 for a budget? Yeah boy, it’s “The Promised Neverland Season 02″ time.

<SPOILERS> because this anime is shit and I don’t care.

First off, I’m not a manga reader. Why does that matter? Because if I were, I’d probably have had an aneurysm watching this anime. “TPN”’s manga ran for 4 years and boasts 181 chapters. The very first season, which was only 1 episode longer than this, adapted the manga up to around chapter 40. Again, why does that matter? 

Because this is the final season of “The Promised Neverland”.

From what I’ve heard after S01 aired, people were concerned about the quality drop in later chapters of the manga but everyone was hyped for S02 because that arc in the manga is a fan favourite and from what I’ve read about it, I can tell why. But what did not only the Studio but the MANGAKA do?! Scrap the entirety of the fucking manga and make up a completely different story for the anime! WHY? HMM?? Is the studio going to go bankrupt or something? What the fuck lead to this decision?? Did the mangaka butcher their most popular creation because??? 

Ok, now putting aside the fact that the arc in the manga that would’ve been adapted for S02 sounds amazing, as a non-manga reader, if this season was you know, GOOD, maybe I would’ve cared a lot less. But is it? Fuck no.

The first maybe 3 episodes did make me wonder why all the fuss was about. We pick up immediately after Emma and her cult followers manage to escape from Grace Field and into the forest. There’s some chase scenes with some demons, 2 new characters with a pretty interesting introduction, and preparation for how the gang was going to proceed. I liked these episodes not really because of the story but because it did still carry the original atmosphere of the 1st Season. And that is the psychological horror genre that set this apart from other anime when it aired.

Anyway, it all completely goes to shit after so whatever. The anime is somehow too fast and too slow at the same time. We’re literally speedrunning the main story itself but there are really long segments where characters just stand around in a dark room and exposition dump for like 5 straight minutes. Oh that reminds me, this anime is dark. Like *literally*. I could barely see shit half the same.

Let’s talk about how the story and the characters were completely butchered (ironically). The characters find an underground shelter, lead there by the plot magic pen. We spend like an episode marveling at how great it will be living there, making you think that the place will play an integral part in the story. No, a fucking SWAT team blows the whole place up the next episode, then they all get killed by a wild demon. We never see these human SWAT people ever again by the way. Then there’s literally a “6 months later” cut (EXCUSE ME?) where we see that Emma’s cult has set up shop near a demon town. Unfortunately, this much more boring (and dark) place is where most of the story takes place. 

We find out that demons need to eat humans to keep their human-ish form or they’ll become deformed and crazed. But there’s also some kind of demon nobility that’s keeping tight supply on their farm animals (the kids) so oh no, there’s class unequality even in the fucking demon world, damn. Anyway, believed to be dead Norman returns like “haha, eyyyyy, I’m gonna kill the demons” then Emma is like “but but demons have like names and families so we shouldn’t kill them!” then Norman is like "okay” but tries to do it anyway. Then we have one of the most cliché and cringe “redemption” scenes where Emma does her plot speech, then Norman cries. Cool. He then just casually throws the fact that due to the drugs he had to take at the Lambda research institute where he was taken, his brain is all messed up and he will die soon. The same is true for his own cult he brought along from Lambda, some of whom were brutally tortured by the demons. But after Emma’s plot speech, Norman does his own plot speech on his followers who are just... okay with it? Suddenly? Like, y’all were tortured for years by demons, probably have mad PTSD, are going to die soon because of the drugs but because Norman said “actually, let’s not do this” they’re all like “ok”????? But fear not, because the magical plot pen gains a new feature where Norman completely casually says that it has the recipe for the drug that can cure them of the Lambda drugs’s effects and the topic is never brought up again.

????

The very final episode is the most horrible of them all. I endured all this and was going to give this anime maybe a 3 or a 2 but this episode....with every single scene, I felt a migraine coming. It was torture. The main-main villain shows up, who’s actually just some human dude, and everyone is holding an AK-47 so they could easily kill him but nooo. Emma tries to do her plot speech magic on him but he instead decides to slice his neck. This was supposed to be impactful, how? We see this dude’s backstory, which makes no sense, and then immediately after he kills himself. AND THEN HIS CORPSE JUST VANISHES. There, gone. The demons also do some sort of uprising and the farm kids and the moms go down to the gate where they could go back to the human world. But Emma is like oh no, I gotta stay with these other losers to do some stuff that probably would’ve been interesting to see animated but whatever. 

The ending is literally just a slide-show of showing the kids vibing in the human world and then an. ENTIRE. storyline. in the demon world with Emma’s little gang. Like from what I could decipher from the 5 images we were shown, Emma changes the promise made between humans and demons so the 2 worlds will be seperate (this is the actual ending of the manga by the way and it’s supposed to be emotional as hell but it was reduced to a single frame), the demons probably had an uprising against the nobles, won, and Mujika is crowned like the saviour of the demon race (I completely forgot to talk about her but this is rant is already long enough). Then some years later, Emma and gang just show up in the human world and everything is hunky-dory, yaaaayyyy.

Besides the story being a fucking mess, you might’ve noticed that I never mentioned Ray anywhere. That’s because, both Norman and Ray become Emma’s side-kicks. Neither of them have a single coherent thought, and whenever they have opposing opinions to Emma’s (which is often), she just uses her plot speech to convince them. None of the rescued kids are interesting either, and every single new character introduced is just a shell. Pretty sure one of them doesn’t even say anything throughout the whole anime. 

The animation, especially compared to S01, is ugly. The characters look bland, the detail is gone, the CGI demons are fugly, there are a LOT of scenes with no movement, and actual frame-to-frame inconsistencies (dude slices his neck with a knife -> shows knife fall to the ground without a speck of blood on it. This is the same dude whose dead body just disappeared from the scene later on.)

And of course, the most interesting thing about this anime, the psychological horror is gone. Instead, we get the typical “hero makes hero decisions even though they make no sense but because of their plot armour everything works out in the end” story, that is just....sigh.

That’s all I have to say to finish off: Sigh. 

[1/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | There was actual money spent on this (or was there)

[xaidyl]

You could explain individual stuff! I find these explanations very fascinating, actually! OwO

okay! lets do this (this may be a very long post with lots of my random opinions but we’ll go with it) (and also please bear in mind these are jokey and in no real way a representation of these real people with real actual lives.)

***spoilers for most D20 seasons with this cast***

1.The babysitting 

Actual parent:Brennan 

From my experience DMing, you are effectively a parent to the players. He would also be an excellent dad

Wine aunt: Siobhan

Siobhan gives me vibes of someone who would take a bottle of wine to go babysit, then sit and tell the kids stuff about cults that they weren’t meant to hear. She would definitely teach the kids swear words, and they would love their cool auntie 

Great at babysitting: Lou

Part of the key to babysitting is being relatable to the kids, but also self assured enough to get them to behave. the person who holds that key is Lou Wilson. He also has played dad-energy characters, and that is the kind of vibes that you look for in a babysitter. 

Mediocre at babysitting: Murph

This scenario needs some theatre of the mind. Imagine Murph, he’s read all the babysitting books, he knows everything he could need to know, he lives with Emily Axeford. He’s more than prepared for this task. He tries so hard. The kids love him. The kids also walk all over him. They don’t get to bed in time. He wanted to do a good job. He tried so hard to do a good job. Yet somehow, luck is against him. 

The house is on fire, God is dead: Emily

Fig. Sofia. Jet. All three of these characters would set a house on fire without hesitation, and not one fears God. What does this have to do with Emily’s babysitting ability? Well, all these characters are teaching us to be chaotic beings, just like Emily. We are the children, and D20 is our babysitter. Emily would only replicate the same thing in this babysitting scenario. 

The children: Zac and Ally

I believe it was episode 9 of the unsleeping city. Neither Zac nor Ally were involved in the scene in question. Siobhan makes a reference to Eliza Doolittle, to which Zac makes a Dr Doolittle joke. Beardsley then shouts ‘I can see my dick’, a reference to a different film. This is fairly normal behaviour, and would not make either of them children in this scenario, had they not continued to hysterically laugh for the next ten minutes or so. Sat at opposite sides of the table. I think Zac starts crying at some point. They are absolute children, and also both have strong baby energy. Neither babysit, they are the ones that need babysitting. 

2. Can they be killed?

Cannot be killed: Brennan

The man is a God. Enough said. Also I’m pretty sure your body would reject your soul before it allows you to kill him. 

Can only be killed by one thing: Siobhan

You would be tricked into thinking Siobhan would be easy to kill- her constitution score is so low, after all. However, you would be wrong. The low constitution score has only made her stronger. More aware. What is the one thing that can kill her, though? Nobody knows, she’s only told those she truly trusts. It could be the most rare poison in the world. Or it could just be Mike Trapp. He (allegedly) has previous.

Can be killed but it won’t last: Emily

It is not anything to do with Emily that her death won’t last. In fact, Emily would be pretty easy to kill. However, if you kill her, Murph will do everything in his power to bring her back. He travels to the end of the earth, and then Emily Axeford is back and gets her new death date in a fancy gothic necklace.

Can be killed but at what cost?: Lou

What cost? The cost to the world. The world would be significantly worse off. You wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. It’s not worth it.

Can be killed but it’s not worth it: Murph

It’s not worth killing Murph because you would have precisely 0.7 seconds before you were killed by Emily. There is no way you can profit from this scenario, you would be dead before you even realise you’ve been successful. 

Can be killed and it would be pretty funny: Zac

I feel like we don’t discus the correlation between Zac Oyama characters and dying enough. Gorgug was the first D20 death. Lapain was the first D20 perma death. Ricky just like had a weapon that causes him to die. If you killed Zac, it would just be funny because its happened so much. Sorry Zac.

Can be killed but why would you, you monster?!?!: Ally

We’ve already discussed this. Beardsley is Baby. Leave them alone. 

Please kill them they suck: Box of Doom

I dont trust them

3. The fitness gram pacer test

this is definitely the most controversial of the charts, but there’s three of things you need to understand about my reasoning.

1. Zac is fast at running  

This has been seen a couple of times, namely: adventuring party, where Zac tried to tease Brennan about showing off how fast he his at running, but it turns out it was just Zac speaking his mind, and he is the one who always shows off at how fast he is at running. Also, the video on Siobhan’s instagram of Zac jumping over that table. 

He is also very bad a squats. Why would you be bad at squats? Bad knees. Why would you get bad knees? Running without sufficient warm up. Why would you skip warm up? Because you are very focussed on being able to run fast. 

2. Zac is willing to defend his title of running fast

The way he accused Brennan on adventuring party, he knew what he was doing. Sabotage. Brennan may also be able to run fast, but Zac would prevent him from getting a good score. How? He has his ways. Zac is a good boy, but not when it comes to running fast.

3. I felt bad

I had to give Zac at least one good one :)

Anyways onto the other choices:

Actually tried and got a low score: Brennan, Murph, Siobhan

We’ve already spoken about how Zac sabotaged Brennan to be the best at running. Murph is here because he would try really hard but something unlucky would happen. His shoelaces come untied. He accidentally gets caught in the Zac/Brennan feud. 

Siobhan started off with the intention to try, but after Lou, Emily and Ally had all done, she realised they were in fact much more interesting than the fighting going on. She walks out mid lap 

Didn’t try, got a low score, doesn’t give a shit: Lou and Emily

Its important to understand that both Lou and Emily are capable of getting a high score, they are just better than the whole thing. Why is their DnD group doing a pacer test? Why did Zac suspiciously force them to do this whole thing? 

The difference between them is Lou knows the feud is stupid and has like actual work to do? He sits and auditions for some other big film. He still watches over his laptop. 

Emily however, simply wants to watch the world burn.

Despite their different approaches to the situation, they both have a bet going on who’s going to be the fastest runner.

Ran one singular lap and finished: Ally

Ally Beardsley shows up at the track wearing a rainbow bucket hat and a tie dye shirt that is impracticable to run in. They have a llama with them. At no point do they explain this. They walk round the track once, drink their water from a plant pot, then spend the rest of the time cheering on the others with words that don’t quite make sense. 

4. Storming Area 51

They cant stop us all: Zac and Brennan

Neither mean it maliciously, but both believe entirely in what they are saying. 

Brennan is definitely the guy to go mad over a conspiracy theory. He made all the crown of candy NPCs. He is basically betraying himself. He knows not to trust anyone. He doesn’t trust area 51. The next season of dimension 20 is this as a subliminal messages all the way through. 

Zac says it accidentally. He’s making a character for the charity livestream. He’s still got a hundred hours of character making left. He’s done so many bad squats. Unintentionally, he makes a character that forces all the zesbians to storm area 51. 

Have fun getting shot, dumbasses: Lou

The rest of the cast are being weird again. Lou is equally as capable of being weird, but sometimes they need to chill. It starts with Emily talking about diner ice. It finishes with Brennan wearing a foil hat at all times. 

You guys stop, someones actually gonna do it: Murph

Murph is a good, lawful boy.

Actually shows up: Emily and Siobhan

They ride a motorcycle there together. They wouldn’t have gone alone, but as a duo they are an unstoppable pair. Emily wants to break into a government facility. Siobhan desperately want to be in the real life x-files.

One of the Aliens: Ally

Emily and Siobhan open a door at area 51. Behind it is Ally Beardsley. They are wearing a rainbow bucket hat and a tie dye shirt. They have a llama standing behind them. This is not explained at any point. They drink from a flower pot and eat a quesadilla that appears out of nowhere. 

5. Stabbing 

Would never stab anyone: Murph

Murph is a good, lawful boy

Would stab in retaliation: Lou, Murph, Zac

Lets be honest, the entirety of a crown of candy so far has been these three taking stabs (or metaphorical ‘where is your bulb now’ stabs) as retaliation for a stab another one of these three had done.

Yells “I won’t hesitate bitch” first: Ally and Siobhan

I can’t really explain this one much more other than i’m pretty sure both these people have said this phrase at least once in their life.

Would stab as a warning: Emily

This would be promptly followed by Murph getting her to stop stabbing. Or, depending on the situation, encouraging her to keep stabbing.

6. The water fountain

Fills up a bottle and drinks from it: Lou and Siobhan

This is the normal way to drink from the water fountain. They were also both very concerned at watching Beardsley’s various different drinking apparatuses in adventuring party. 

Bought 4 water bottles so this wouldn’t happen: Murph

He is prepared. Something probably still goes wrong, but at least he’s got three water bottles left. 

Drinks straight from the tap: Brennan

Brennan is a busy guy. The tap is there, it’s convenient, he needs to get back to planning. There’s so many campaigns, so many characters, so many voices. 

Dehydrates: Zac

Honestly I’m not sure if this man would drink water if nobody told him so

Drinks from a puddle: Ally

like they drink from a vase with a flower, a puddle really isn’t that much of a stretch.

Licks the tap: Emily

She just wants to see the world burn. Also, she knows Brennan drinks straight from the tap. She has to get payback somehow. 

7. A child starts crying

Makes the child laugh: Lou

We’ve already discussed how Lou has dad energy. I feel like he’s know exactly what to say and how to act to get the child to stop crying. This is less stupid than the rest of my explanations, but I always love how expressive Lou is when he plays dnd. I’m not sure whether its the way he holds himself or the way he gestures, but I’m pretty sure if I was a crying child, I would stop crying if Lou Wilson told me a joke in that very soothing point.

Tries to play with the child: Siobhan and Ally

These two kinda give me older/younger sibling vibes. As a team I recon they could create a game that would calm this child down. Also Ally knows techniques to help adults calm down, they could probably implement these ideas into a game for children.

Gives detailed instructions: Murph

His knowledge comes from the books he has read to learn how to babysit, and the one time he babysat. His explanation is rather frantic however, mostly because he is trying to defend Emily in his answer.

Cries with the child: Zac

He’s sad because all his friends are speaking to this child an nobody noticed how fast he just ran.

He’s also baby, as we’ve said previously, so he probably relates to the child somewhat

The reason the child is crying: Emily and Brennan

The child just watched episode 9 of a crown of candy. 

[calliecat93]

ST: TNG Watchthrough Episodes 17-20.

Home Soil: So from what I’ve read, this would be Gene Roddenberry’s final episode as showrunner before getting replaced by writer Maurice Hurly. I won’t comment on the behind the scenes drama and such that caused it because it was decades ago and not relevant for a First Watchthrough post, but since this is the last I wanted to make note of it. My thoughts? It was okay. This is very much borrowing from the TOS episode Devil in the Dark (the one with the Horta) with the plot being of an alien presence killing humans... but only because the humans were unknowingly causing it harm. It’s done fine enough, not being any better or worst than when TOS did it, but that’s about it. It does executed it a little differently with the events and the alien is FAR less willing to comply than the Horta was at first and ends with the alien backing down, but refusing contact with humans for three centuries, which DOES make it a nice contrast to how Devil in the Dark ended. It’s not great. It’s not horrible. It’s just okay with the biggest criticism being pulling too much from TOS again. Look, I love TOS and so far TNG hasn’t passed it. I outright have a 30 disc Blu-Ray set coming in the next few days of all the TOS material, including TAS and the films. If I want to revisit TOS, I’ll go watch it or read fanfiction or heck, go watch AOS. TNG has remained painfully average or not good at this point because it’s trying to retain what TOS had, despite it being over 20 years later and even the TOS films had changed how it did things compared to the show. Whatever one feels about Roddenberry, his removal I hope helped push TNG away from TOS and let it carve it’s own identity while still honoring what TOS had stood for, and according to history it did. Not sure if we’ll see the quality go up in these final few S1 episodes, but still. Sorry, felt appropriate to finally get this out here. Going back to the episode, it’s perfectly fine and it delivers it’s message well, and hey it’s not always a bad idea to showcase the same themes as the previous incarnation in a spinoff especially fi a relevant one/gets shown to viewers who hadn’t seen that TOS episode. Not the best, not the worst, and that’s not such a bad way to end up. 3/5.

Coming of Age: Alright Wesley, it took a bit but you’re starting to grow on me. So we have Wesley going through a test to get into the Academy while Picard and the crew are dealing with some rough interrogations and Picard being painted as an incompetent captain by the interrogator. They don’t seem that connected, but infact the latter is a test for Picard to determine if e’s ready for a promotion. I like how they bring up Picard’s actions in past continuity that WOULD present him as at least fallible to major error, ignoring certain conditions that caused it to begin with and how he got them out of the situation. Like I said, this was one of Wesley’s better episodes. While doing well with testing, his worry about the psyche test and not knowing his own fear and therefore worried about what the test will unleash upon him is very relatable. Heck his talk with Worf was a really nice scene, especially with Worf outright stating that only fools fear nothing which in turns add more depth and dimensions to the Klingons. The reveal fo his greatest fear, while I wish he had hesitated a little bit more, made perfect sense and he acted as a true Starfleet Officer. Which since this was before Undiscovered Country, is a VERY positive development. Picard guiding a kid who made a stupid decision was also good and shows why he’s a good captain, and his talk to him as well as encouraging a disappointed Wesley at the end was a nice moment to cap the episode off with. As far as Wesley goes, he may still be presented as too competent and intelligent, but he is more likeable and the testing setting allows him to shine like this without, again, affecting the adult characters. Plus text anxiety is super relatable haha. Now of course due to Status Quo is God, Wesley fails, but he takes it well and proved that he will be ready for it in the future. It was a pretty nice episode all in all. Nothing spectacular, but I enjoyed it, neither plot overpowered the other, had a good theme of one’s integrity as a person/doing your best, good use of past continuity, and it really shows the best in characters like Picard, Wesley, and the crew’s loyalty to the former. 4/5.

Heart of Glory: Back in TOS, the Klingons were depicted as war-loving jerks. They weren’t without some depth and episodes like Day of the Dove did attempt to give them a bit more positive limelight, but it wasn’t enough to overpower the one-dimensional characterization. The films were a bit better, Undiscovered Country especialy, but that one hadn’t been made yet and they still stuck with the ruthless characterization, just changed up the makeup to make them look more alien like. It was weird sicne whenever I ddi watch TNG back when that’s all I knew of Star Trek, Worf never came across like a ruthless warmonger but like an honorable warrior which made him stand-out amongst the cast for me (that and because I freakin’ love Michael Dorn due to his animation voice over work, anyone else remember I.M. Weasel? XD). So now we get an episode where Worf gets to interact with other Klingons. I lift a brow at Worf not knowing about most Klingon customs when he seemed perfectly knowledgeable about i in past episodes. Maybe that wad due tot he shift after getting rid of Roddenberry/ IDK, but these kinds of retcons happens sometimes. This was an interesting one for sure. The Klingons are much better presented here than the entirety of TOS, showing more of their culture/customs and compared to Worf, who was raised by humans and therefore not fully in touch with his people and their ways. This is probably one of, if not the first time he’s interacted with his full culture and naturally he’d want to interact with them and learn more now that he has the chance. There’s the themes of one growing in another culture, how they adapt while still trying to be part of that culture, and finding one’s own path. There is the question on why Worf wans’t just returned tot he Klingons as a child and IDK if they address it down the line, but that type of life and struggle with identity/culture clash due to upbringing IS real and VERY relatable. I’m really glad to see the Klingons fleshed out past their TOS depiction and it’s overall respected by the cast, showing how far things have come since Kirk’s time. It fleshes out Worf’s character a great deal and makes him more likable/relatable and giving him a very realistic struggle, and in the end he stands by his beliefs and even gets the respect and offer to serve with Klingons in the future by Klingon Captain K’Nera. Very much glad that I watched this one~ 4/5.

The Arsenal of Freedom: Oh boy, war machines that killed everything! That theme never gets old! I’m not joking, with how modern warfare and technology are growing and being sold for profit, it feels like it just keeps getting more and more relevant. There’s a lot of tension in this one with Yar, Data, and Riker dealing with the arsenal that is intelligent and they’re unable to be beamed up, the ship getting attacked with Geordi in command and the Chief Engineer (they seem to go through a LOT of those this season, guess they couldn’t handle the strain of acting as miracle workers like Scotty) being an asshole to him, and Crusher injured with Picard trying to keep her alive and not get killed. Seriously, I loved Geordi here for being an effective acting commanding officer during a VERY intense situation AND telling off the Chief Engineer without even so much as raising is voice while encouraging the other officers. Badass and admirable. The away team scenes were also good with everyone being plain awesome~ Crusher having to explain to Picard how to treat her injuries while she’s in obvious pain was really good character stuff and Thank God that they avoided indulging in the obvious shipping fodder. I know they’ve hinted a little at Picard/Crusher... but I’m not really interested in it int he romantic sense at least currently. It comes off as a Captain and CMO trusting the other (not quite the same as say... Kirk and McCoy, but the trust is very much strong here plus Picard and Crusher should be allowed to form their own dynamic) and that’s the kind of interaction I live for~! It feels like everyone got a moment to shine, even Troi checking on Geordi’s mental well-being and letting him express some of his nervousness was really nice. And of course the arsenal having destroyed their own creators... like I said, a theme that just seems to grow more and more in relevance. Like I said above, some themes are necessary to repeat, and this one very much qualifies. But yeah this was great for it’s tensions, the characters being all great especially Geordi, and it’s themes (even fi IDK how intentional it was) being a huge reminder of the dangers of modernized warfare/using warfare for profit. It doesn’t go well. 4.5/5.

Okay, it’s late in the season, but we are FINALLY getting somewhere! The characters have truly grown on me and their characterizations are getting better (i.e. Picard is still a serious captain, but is very much warming up and not as cold as he was early on), the stories are steadily improving, and even with what I said about the first one, I really enjoyed this batch of episodes! Only five remain in the season, and the plan is to knock ‘em all out tomorrow. Might take a day or two off before tarting Season 2, but golly I’m finally feeling excited~!

[nevermindthewind]

the beach house on crack: a love island au

alright lads so basically i’ve been binge watching love island and got to thinking about how jake and amy would be if they were in the villa bc you know it’d be spicy af so naturally i called up my resident brit @fourdrinkamy​ and the two of us wrote up some (4k words of) headcanons!!! If you dont watch love island then 1) culture yourself 2) it’s a british reality tv show that’s like a better version of the bachelor

“The premise of Love Island is simple. A group of attractive 20-somethings are made to couple up and share a bed—regardless of whether they have a romantic connection—in a villa on the Spanish island of Majorca. New cast members and challenges are introduced to make things difficult and they are made to recouple.” - time.com (oh + the winning couple gets £50k)

keep reading below the cut for some reality tv/brooklyn nine nine madness!!!

· so jake and amy are part of the original ten in the villa, obvs, along with charles, terry, gina, sharon and rosa and a few other randos who we don’t care about

· when jake comes in amy thinks he’s cute in a goofy sort of way but she doesn’t step forward (therefore admitting she would want to couple up with him) bc she wants to keep her options open and what not but jake thinks shes a BABE so he decides to couple with her anyway

She’s not mad about it though, he seems like a good time

charles choses rosa and she is Not Pleased bc he seems like a goober (he is)

Terry picks sharon and they become like the jack and dani of the season (kinda)

· Charles and jake instantly bond and have one of the best bromances in love island history

· Gina is the biggest pot stirrer the island’s ever seen and is constantly trying to get terry away from sharon but he doesn’t ever budge

· within the first few days its clear to amy they’re just gonna be buddies but that’s fine bc while he likes orange soda in his cereal and is possibly the messiest man she’s ever met he’s really funny and they’re really good at all the different competitions and she’s got the perfect wingman for when mr. right does come around!

· jake doesn’t mind either bc amy’s super chill and also wants to join the police academy so they can talk cop movies which is dope and also they smoke the competition when it comes to challenges

· Amy loves that they get given water bottles and forces Jake to drink it in its entirety x3 daily

· The first set of new guys/girls comes into the villa and while amy and jake both try neither of them feel anything so at the first recoupling Amy chooses to stay with jake so they both can stay and try to find someone

Rosa choses the new guy marcus much to charles’ disappointment

· jake gets everyone in the villa to start making title of your sex tape jokes and it becomes a running joke and the public gets it trending on twitter

· Over the course of the next week or so they have become each other’s best friend in the villa and often find themselves hanging out one on one even when they don’t have to, to the point where everyone else is questioning whether they actually like each other or not

· The islanders get a text from the producers (“I GOT A TEXT”) saying each couple has to pick two other couples they think are the least compatible and whoever has the most votes will get dumped from the villa, but even though jake and amy are in a friendship couple the rest of the couples think they have such good chemistry they don’t receive a single vote

· jake’s thinking the same thing and confides in charles after a few drinks and charles convinces him to say something to her

Charles is already a self-defined “melt” for jake & amy

THATS WHEN TEDDY COMES INTO THE ISLAND dun dun dun

Amy’s instantly drawn to teddy and everyone is excited bc she finally found someone she’s interested in

“He’s 100% my type on paper”

jake is genuinely happy for her ( “how do i look? Is this lipstick too much?” “you look great, ames”) but at the same time is a sad lil puppy

That night they recouple and amy chooses teddy and the public are sad bc jake and amy belong together!!!!!

Gina recouples with jake to keep him around bc she’s his mate le duh

amy’s all excited that night because she finally has someone to cuddle with but teddy just??? rolls over and goes to bed??? uh okay…

Also he snores. Big time.

Charles brings his sleep apnea machine and between that and teddy’s snores no one can sleep

On the brightside no one can hear the couples who are ~doing bits~

(A/N to clarify: in the villa, everyone sleeps in the same room which has six double beds & you share a bed with whoever you happen to be ‘coupled up’ with at the time)

· The jimmy jabs is totes one of the competitions they do and jake lets amy (and therefore teddy) win bc he knows how bad she wants it……and because he still likes her

· The heist, on the other hand, is something jake comes up with on his own and eventually everyone in the villa starts swiping things from each other

· Eventually this super hot girl sophia enters the villa and jake is SMITTEN

Jake in the interview room: “Looks like the gods have finally answered my prayers…”

iain the narrator: “Yes, the gods. Or, our producers wanted a bit of action so they asked our intern to find out your type.”

· Pimento enters the villa the same time as sophia and he and rosa are instantly drawn to each other and poor marcus doesnt stand a chance

They become co-presidents of the do bits society within like a day, even doing it in the middle of the day

Jake walks in on them doing it TWICE in one day and just silently backs out of the room, it’s not like he needed sun cream anyway

· sophia gets to pick two guys to take on a date and one of them is jake and amy is v jealous bc teddy is a dud (not that she’s going to admit that to anyone apart from in the talking head…just yet)

“I just don’t get what he sees in her honestly? Oh god…am i jealous of sophia?! Noooooo…”

Iain the narrator: “Yessssssss…”

· Amy’s been trying to get to know teddy, but it turns out the guy is a total snoozefest, which she tells gina and rosa one day while they’re getting ready

“All he ever talks about is pilsners. I dont even like pilsners!!!”

“Also, I dunno if you guys noticed this but the guy wears mesh underwear. Like why? Is it medical? How do you even ask that?!”

· Jake and sophia immediately hit it off and in the same episode it becomes v clear amy is over teddy and his lack of a personality

Theres a recoupling where boys pick and jake picks sophia and teddy picks amy but amy is Not Pleased

· A group of the islanders (led by Jake) creates a game where they take a shot every time Teddy chooses a pilsner to drink

charles is pissed by like six pm

· UH OH THERES A KISSING CHALLENGE

The islanders play snog marry pie, so basically the boys line up in a line and the girls pick a boy to make out with and one they’d want to marry (and one they want to throw a literal pie in their face)

Sophia snogs jake ofc and then says she’d marry some rando (again who we don’t care about)

Amy, however, chooses to marry teddy - “i’m marrying you because i think we’d have cute babies who would go to code camp” - AND KISSES JAKE. jake is surprised but also not upset?? And when amy pulls away jake seems to lean in for more!!!

Cut to sophia in the talking head like “HANG ON. why did she kiss jake and why did he look like he was going in for more???”

Sophia gets pissed off at jake who’s genuinely confused

“It was just a game??  Like i’dve kissed anyone bc that’s literally the game”

“Yes jake but you clearly went for more. And you didn’t have to slip your tongue into her mouth.”

Jake tries to clear his name but sophia’s not having it

“If you liked amy you should’ve just told me, not made out with her in front of me and the whole damn country”

She storms off after that leaving jake alone on the swinging couch

Cut to jake smiling in the talking head: “amy kissed me…”

NEXT TIME ON LOVE ISLAND…

Just kidding i don’t have enough follow through to make two posts so we’re just gonna do it all now

· After all that ~drama~ sophia goes to sleep on the couch but jake, ever the gentleman, tells her he’ll take the couch and she can sleep in the bed

Teddy and amy still share a bed…i mean it’s not like they cuddled before anyway…

· Everyone in the villa gives jake crap for his bedhead and amy crap for her old lady glasses

Jake def makes the glasses/penis comment and iain makes some snarky narrator remark

· Jake and Amy kinda dance around each other most of the day and then they hear Gina announce “I GOT A TEEEEEXXXXXT”

“Islanders, tonight there will be a recoupling. The girls will choose their partner. The remaining boy with be dumped from the villa immediately. #choosewisely”

Everyone in the villa immediately turns to jake and amy

· After a proper gassing up from gina, rosa, and charles jake finally goes over to amy

“Hey ames, can we go for a chat?”

Amy tucks her hair behind her ears as she gets up heheheh

Gina, rosa and charles don’t even try to hide the fact that they’re watching the entire conversation unfold from their spot on the day bed

· They go to the hanging couch (the best spot in the villa in my humble opinion) and jake finally tells her how he feels!!!!

“Look, i dont wanna be a jerk…I know you’re coupled up with teddy and it’s going really well. It’s just…”

“What’s going on?”

“I don’t know what’s going to happen at this recoupling and I think I’d be pissed with myself if I didn’t say this. I kinda wish something could happen between us…romantic stylez. And i know it probably will never happen because you’re happy in your couple but…”

· Before either of them can say anything more they’re cut off by terry announcing he has a text!!!

“Islanders, it is now time for the recoupling. Whichever boy is not chosen to recouple will be dumped from the villa immediately.”

Jake and amy just kinda stare at each other for a few seconds before amy finally gets up wordlessly and walks to the bonfire

· In classic love island fashion, amy has to choose her boy last, so it’s down to just teddy and jake. Whoever she doesn’t pick has to leave the villa.

Everyone, e v e r y o n e is visibly stressed. Charles is full on crying, and rosa is clutching pimento’s hand so hard it may or may not break by the end of the night

Teddy, god bless him, looks completely at ease. Jake keeps scratching the back of his neck and wringing his hands

· Finally amy takes a deep breath.  

“I chose this boy because…he makes me laugh. He’s a good friend, and he knows me better than anyone in the villa. Also – he’s probably gonna make fun of me for saying this – but he’s, like, really fit. I don’t know, I just would be so, so sad if he left the villa. And I want to give us a chance to go beyond friends.”

At this point the camera flips to jake who is giving her the smallest, sweetest smile and then to teddy who’s finally catching on.

“The boy I choose is…”

*dramatic-ass pause*

“Jake.”

· THE MUSIC SWELLS. JAKE WALKS OVER TO HER AND GIVES HER THE SWEETEST KISS. EVERYONE CRIES, EVEN ROSA.

Amy smiles as they pull apart.

“So, a lot of change around here, huh?”

He kisses her again. :’)

· The first night they sleep together they don’t kiss but they do spoon

Jake is almost always the little spoon and at first he gets crap from the other boys when they see this but he doesn’t care because being the little spoon is the best!!!!! He gets to wake up in amys arms like hellooooo

· Amy and jake are surprisingly affectionate??? Not in a weird way like charles and genevieve but amy just always seems to have a hand on his knee or what have you

For the record, amy was NEVER like that with teddy.

· Amy has a STRICT no-sex rule in the bedroom bc hello they are on national television her abuela could be watching!!!! + it would be super weird to do bits in the same room as charles…of course jake completely and utterly respects this and doesn’t even question it. If he has to go 6 weeks without sex even though he’s sharing a bed every night with the hottest girl he’s ever seen then so be it

· UNTIL it’s announced via text that The Hideaway (a private area/bedroom in the villa away from everyone else but still not the cameras Obviously this is love island) is open and the islanders get to choose a couple to stay there for the night. Having had to put up with their blossoming love and flirting 24 fucking 7 everyone else unanimously screams “jake and amy!!!! It has to be Jake and amy!!!!” and they just grin at each other

· The bed is so big and covered in rose petals & there happens to be a very handy bowl of condoms on the bedside table…at first they just talk about how nice it is to get some alone time and just hang out….which of course turns to kissing and then making out and then………under the covers they go (for those who don’t actually watch the show it’s literally like seeing sims wahooing but irl) (maybe we see a cheeky black and white shot of amy moaning)

· The next morning amy wakes up with the BIGGEST grin on her face and her hair all mussed, and she kisses jake awake “morning, baby” and he immediately pulls her into him and kisses her back

Jake’s talking head: “Last night? Last night was….it was amazing. Stupid good. That’s all I’m going to say.” our boy!!! Cannot!!! Stop smiling!!!!

· When they get back to the main villa they naturally segregate into boys and girls and the guys immediately ask jake “how was your night? Did you get any??” “oh my god, did you FRENCH???” “charles, no nothing happened”

· (in true Jamie style) he goes over to the day beds with amy and lets her cuddle into his chest and asks if it’s okay if he tells people what happened in the hideaway - he’s a gentleman!!! And he’s always going to respect her boundaries!! Amy tells him of course that’s okay, people are going to find out anyway and that it’s really sweet of him to check with her…and she laughs to herself when jake goes back over to the boys and she hears charles scream “I KNEW YOU WERE GLOWING”

· Rosa and Gina casually-but-not-so-subtly ask amy “so did you shag? Tell us everything” and amy just smiles….rosa and gina look at each other like noice, they’re so proud of her!!

Rosa later confides in amy “the amy i knew two weeks ago would nEver have done that with Teddy…i’m happy for you, santiago”

· CASA AMOR. the boys have to sneak out of the villa (jake goes into full on spy mode rolling around on the carpet) and get shipped off to a separate one that has 6 new girls in it and then 6 new boys enter the old villa to shake things up (reality television at its absolute FINEST YALL)…the producers’ twist? Fucking Constantine Kane gets put in the girls’ villa - amy’s eyes widen out of their sockets when she sees her most random ex enter. He of course is still so in love with her, or so he claims, and tells her how excited he is to couple up with her and share a bed and win her over and get married and have babies with her. Amy naturally is like no way jose and spends the entire time trying to avoid him (with the help of rosa) hiding everywhere she can fit and sleeping on the sofa at night (and, also naturally, she worries that Sophia 2.0 is with jake right now and she realises it kind of makes her sick to her stomach thinking about jake kissing another girl….maybe she likes him even more than she thought she did?)

· Just to mess with him, jake gets a text that has a photo of constantine trying to kiss amy and poor bb gets beside himself with worry…

Jake’s talking head: “I mean Amy can do whatever she wants, I’m obviously not going to stop her from being with another person - we’ve only known each other for what a month…” [he looks away from the camera and rubs his face with his hand] “But I really like her…so it just kinda…sucks.”

· OBVIOUSLY he has nothing to worry about and his face!!!!!!!!! Just lights up in relief!!!!! When amy walks back into the og villa during the Most Dramatic recoupling without bringing back anyone from the new one!!! She rushes over to him and cups his face with her hands and kisses him hard in front of everyone

· “I missed you, you know” “I missed you too” “Hey I have to ask…that guy you were with-” “You saw that?” “I got sent a photo…nothing…nothing happened between you, right?” “Yes - I mean no. Things did happen. In the past, on the outside. But I was young and I regret it so much - i tried to avoid him the entire time in casa amor. Honestly all I could think about was how much i wanted to be hanging out with you” “really?”  she moves to sit on his lap, wraps her arms around his next and kisses his cheek.  “the only person i want to be in this villa with is you” “i could say the same thing about you, ames” and then they get straight back to kissing :’)))

Iain: “nope, that’s definitely not a tear in my eye”

· One morning the islanders wake up to the delightful sound of babies screaming bc you guessed it!! baby challenge!!! (i.e. towards the end of the summer, the couples are given plastic babies and have to look after them for a day)

Amy is SO excited and throws the covers off running towards the cribs (after Charles and Genevieve) screaming - “We made a baby! Oh my god I have a baby!” leaving a half-awake dazed and confused jake still in bed

Jake & Rosa eventually bother getting out of their respective beds, definitely not as excited as the rest of the villa, but jake will admit his heart flutters a little seeing amy cradling a plastic baby to her chest so attentively

“Jake! Look we have a little girl!” “awww she looks just like you, Ames” “we have to name her” “Nakatomi” jake answers immediately, to which amy whines “jaaaake take it seriously! I’m not having a daughter called Nakatomi” “fine, i’ll compromise on Holly”

At first jake is a little apprehensive about having this new Responsibility (and he’s not about to blurt out all his dad issues on national television) and so he keeps his distance and mainly lets amy take care of their new offspring in the morning (“amessss why does it keep crying?” “i cannot Believe you would call our baby it, peralta!”) That is until the girls get sent off on a Mommy’s Lunch, turning the villa into daddy day care….

He knows how much Amy loves this little baby so he decides he is going to take this seriously and it doesn’t take long for him to realise that??? This is kinda fun??? He takes Holly on strolls in her buggy around the villa and plays with her in the pool with charles and terry and (tugging at the public’s heart) sits on a day bed with her and tells her just how awesome her mummy is

When amy gets back, her heart completely MELTS at the sight of her new bf with their little one……and they end up talking about how they’re the best parents in the entire villa nay the world (“our kid is WAY cuter than terry and sharon’s” “oh for SURE”) & then of course win the challenge

· For the Final Date extravaganza they go on a helicopter ride and ngl even Amy is beside herself with excitement…they’ve spent the last 6 weeks talking about their favourite action films etc. and now it’s like they’re in one! They definitely act like literal children/real cops pretending they’re on a manhunt for a fugitive (instead of appreciating the view like normal people)

They get treated to a romantic dinner afterwards followed by dancing with live musicians and that’s when they FINALLY say those 3 words to each other….(well 5 if you count “noice, smort”)

· AND THE WINNER IS…..jake and amy obviously this is a b99 x love island au :’) they’re so sweet and humble about it & amy makes jake promise on live national television that he’s not just going to spend all their cash prize on sneakers. They each end up with over a million followers on their instagrams, where they regularly post photos of each other on date night/ at premieres/ evenings at home…and also video sagas of them pranking each other which starts with amy pieing jake’s face unexpectedly and escalates into fake proposals and frozen shoes….and maybe some *light* tasering

· Of course they end up getting married for realz and a baby announcement follows not too long after that…they are utterly the nation’s sweethearts (and Charles keeps doing interviews to the press saying he’s the one who brought them together in the villa from the beginning)

[cjrae]

The Monster And The Man. Or: Why is Dan’s emotional catharsis less sympathetic than Lucifer’s?

If there’s one character that people seem to be angrier at than Chloe Decker, it’s Dan Espinoza. Chloe came much closer to crossing an unforgivable line in Season 4 than I think many of us expected. Dan, on the other hand, walked up to the line, stepped over it, tried to step back behind it before deciding to light the whole bloody thing on fire.

So, if you’re a fan who’s pissed at Dan, you’re far from alone. The fact of the matter is that Dan Espinoza is the most unlikeable principal character on the show and the hardest to sympathize with. He serves as a foil for Chloe and as a mirror for Lucifer. It’s not an accident that Dan is at his most sympathetic in Season 3, when Lucifer is re-integrating the angelic facets of his identity and is his absolute worst self in Season 4, as Lucifer is coming to terms with his own self-hatred. 

As much as we may hate to give Marcus Pierce credit for anything, the man was an astute judge of character. He had Dan pegged from the moment he met him and it’s an identity Dan alternately embraces and rejects. He is a corrupt cop.

The show’s take on corruption within the LAPD is a subject worthy of it’s own essay, so for now I’m going to focus on Dan and Lucifer’s mirrored stories within 4x07′s “Devil Is As Devil Does”.

In Season 4, both Lucifer and Dan are drowning in the same two emotions - grief and self-hatred. How that manifests, however, is very different. Lucifer turns his emotions on himself. Dan turns them outward, looking for a target and Lucifer makes a very easy and convenient target to punish for Charlotte’s death.

In a different essay, I pointed out that at no point is Lucifer interested in punishing Chloe for her betrayal - what he wants is her acceptance. The same thing is happening with Dan. Lucifer doesn’t default to calling him “Detective Douche” as his go-to nickname. In the majority of scenes, Lucifer refers to him as “Daniel,” even as he outwardly pushes back against Dan’s blame. And, as we will realize at the end of 4x09, Lucifer actually agrees with Dan. Allowing Dan to punish him, within certain boundaries, is the only form of care that his friend will accept from Lucifer.

Lucifer also understands instinctively what Dan is doing. He’s punishing himself. Even in 4x07, as Dan and Lucifer are both hitting rock bottom, when Eve suggests that they punish him Lucifer responds, “His existence is punishment enough.” It’s a cold, cutting statement, befitting how Dan treated him in the wake of Officer Joan’s death, but even Lucifer at his worst puts Dan off-limits.

Dan, unfortunately, does not return the favor.

Both Dan and Lucifer are struggling with the same issue - an innocent officer is dead because they trusted mortal law. Lucifer, however, is in a greater position of power than Dan; he is the Devil. He has the power to punish Julian and driven by grief and rage and pain, with Eve whispering encouragement in his ear, he does just that.

Dan is also in a position of power, but it’s a position of human power and it’s a position he know how to use - and how to abuse. The entirety of Dan’s arc in Season 1 is watching his corrupt choices spiral out of control until multiple people are dead. Season 2, he has a man killed when the justice system sets a guilty man free. Season 3, he’s trying to do better, but once Charlotte is killed he actively embraces the identity of the corrupt cop when facing Pierce’s henchman.

4x07, we see Dan return to an old trick - use someone else to do the dirty work while attempting to keep his hands clean. It’s important to note that Dan doesn’t actually have a problem with Julian’s fate. In fact, he’s gleeful when he leans into his face and taunts him with “cop killer” and how he’s going to suffer in jail. It isn’t until he puts the pieces together and realizes that Lucifer has done this that he’s able to justify putting a target on Lucifer’s back. Worse, Lucifer has succeeded in delivering Julian to the police to be tried and jailed.

So, Dan pulls out his detective skills - and it’s a good reminder that Dan, for all his flaws, is a formidable detective when motivated. He manages to find Lucifer’s cigarette in the trash, which is circumstantial, but enough justification for his desire. He wants Lucifer punished, to feel every bit of pain that Dan is currently feeling. So he whispers Lucifer’s name in Jacob Tiernan’s ear and waits to see the chaos unfold.

Dan’s hubris is that he has completely underestimated what kind of man Jacob Tiernan is and even before they realize that Trixie is in danger you can see Dan begin to panic. For all that he wants Lucifer punished, he doesn’t want Lucifer dead. It’s a bit of a truism that the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. Dan is angry at Lucifer because he cares and because he views Lucifer as a safe target to vent his anger at because of their past friendship. This moment is when his self-protective bubble of anger pops. Dan has put Lucifer in mortal danger and even though Dan knows full well that Lucifer can take care of himself (and has seen evidence of it), Lucifer isn’t bulletproof as far as he knows.

And then Chloe realizes that Trixie has snuck out of the house to see Lucifer and Dan’s entire world threatens to shatter. In one fell swoop not only is his daughter’s life in danger, along with Lucifer’s, but Chloe’s respect for him is on the line as well if she finds out. Then there’s the cherry on top, his career. The monster hiding in Dan’s psyche is the corrupt cop and it’s a monster he doesn’t want to be.

Dan’s hits rock bottom the moment he bursts out of that elevator to find Lucifer having subdued Tiernan’s henchmen and Trixie safe on the balcony. Dan is shamed - not only did he put his daughter’s life in jeopardy but the very man he wanted to punish is the one who was ultimately able to protect her. 

Lucifer hasn’t quite hit his yet (that’ll come when he sees his wings) but he’s been knocked away from the same edge that Dan’s been on the entire season, and twice - first when Chloe confronts him with what he already knows - what he did was wrong and he knows it, even if he’s not willing to admit it. The image of Chloe disappointed in him with tears streaming down her face, is enough to have Lucifer stalling and it’s something that Eve points out.

The second time is when Trixie - one of the few truly innocent characters on the show - bounces into his penthouse and demonstrates her complete faith in Lucifer in a season when even Chloe is struggling with reconciling the good man she knows and the Devil who is capable of dealing out punishment with cruel sense of irony. 

Dan putting Trixie’s life in danger gives Lucifer a second chance. He failed to protect Officer Joan. But when it truly matters, when Trixie’s life is on the line, Lucifer does not fail. Dan bursts in to Lucifer’s triumph in the face of his own failure. Only now he doesn’t have the shield of his anger to hide behind anymore. He’s lost, confused and in pain. He’s waiting to be punished. The moment when Tiernan’s thug tells Chloe that Tiernan found out that Lucifer broke Julian’s back is drawn out, letting the audience feel Dan’s agony, caught between terror and relief at being found out. 

And then he gets away with it. Scot-free, as far as Dan knows. (For now. God bless Ella Lopez). All’s well that ends well, right? After all, Trixie is fine, Lucifer is fine. 

Not quite. Dan now has to figure out how he’s going to reconcile the man and the monster. He may not have a pair of devil wings to show him how far he’s fallen, but he doesn’t need them. All he has to do is look at his daughter’s face and know that she’s still breathing because the man he was angry enough to punish was the one to protect her, not him. Neither the corrupt cop nor the Devil is an instrument of justice, a realization that both Dan and Lucifer have come to by the end of the episode. 

It’s easy to be flip and simply say that Lucifer engenders more sympathy than Dan because Lucifer hasn’t spent the entirety of Season 4 up to this point being a jerk, but that isn’t entirely true. Lucifer’s pain is very much a consequence of his own choices. He rebelled against his father. He spent millennia “sowing destruction and chaos for his own amusement” (thank you Amenadiel). Those seeds grew into the stories that shook Chloe’s faith in him. It doesn’t excuse her choices, but it puts them into a context that is perfectly understandable. Lucifer is the Devil.

The Devil is so much more powerful a character than Dan Espinoza, corrupt cop. As out of line as Lucifer is in this episode, he does not abuse his power to the extent that Dan does. He could have killed Julian, completely circumventing human law and sending Julian straight into Lucifer’s territory, to do with as he pleases. What Lucifer does to Julian is horrific enough, but he’s still delivered to the police, able to be tried for both human trafficking and Officer Joan’s murder. And, when confronted with the consequences of that choice, Lucifer makes a different choice with Jacob Tiernan. He recognizes that the punishment Tiernan deserves is within the realm of human law, not celestial justice. And he acknowledges that he was wrong directly to Chloe.

Dan’s power is much more limited and when he abuses it he does so almost to his fullest extent. It’s not an accident that the next episode deals with police brutality and Dan is faced with having to tell Amenadiel that, despite putting in a complaint, the officers that nearly shot an unarmed black kid won’t face any consequences. Just as Dan isn’t facing any consequences for his own actions. Moreover, Dan isn’t confessing what he did to anyone, even when he has the opportunity to in the very next scene with Ella pulling him aside to tell him that she knows there was a cop involved in the Tiernan case.

Contrast this with Lucifer who within the first twenty minutes of 4x07 tells Chloe the truth - and Chloe’s response illustrates the power difference very starkly. “What am I supposed to do with this?” Lucifer is the Devil. He doesn’t have to follow human law if he doesn’t want to. Chloe literally has no way to hold him to account except to confront him with his own conscience and hope that she gets through to him.

The pettiness of Dan’s actions and the limits of his power are what help throw Dan into a much more unsympathetic light than Lucifer.

It’s easier for us to parse a corrupt cop backsliding than it is to watch the Devil himself do the same. Unlike Lucifer, Dan could be held to account. He’s gotten multiple people killed. He’s put others in danger and it’s a choice that he keeps making over and over again. 

In a just world, Dan Espinoza would have been drummed out of the LAPD at the end of Season 1. He ought to be in jail himself and he knows it. We have seen his perspective and we understand and sympathize with each step he took to get here, but all the good intentions in the world do not justify Dan’s actions.

But this isn’t a just world and Dan is protected first by luck and later by Ella, who prioritizes mercy over punishment. Dan’s pain and need for help are more important to her than what almost happened in Lucifer’s penthouse. (Presumably Ella, who joined the LAPD in Season 2 and is also unaware of Dan giving up Warden Perry to the Russian mob, is missing the fact that this is an established pattern of behavior). 

Because this is a show about redemption, we feel a certain amount of relief as Dan begins to get the help he needs to move on after Charlotte’s murder. But true redemption doesn’t just require an acknowledgment that your actions were wrong. It also requires restitution. And Dan has not offered that since the ending of Season 1, when he turned himself in to prevent Lucifer from going down for murder. My biggest wish for Dan in Season 5 would be to see him take responsibility for his choices, even when the consequences are dire.

[shadowed-dancer]

SVTFOE Season 4 Rewrite

Long, long ago I hinted that I’d make this and then I didn’t post it. It’s been sitting in my drafts for months so I figured “hey, maybe it’s time.” Some of you may recall this rewrite I did back in May which changed the events of Cleaved, but I wanted to go further. In an ideal scenario, we never get to the point where Cleaved is a necessary episode because the build up of the season was designed in a way that any resolution ends up being unsatisfying.

For this little writing exercise I’ve decided to undertake, I’d like to establish my ground rules. I will be working with the amount of episodes already allotted to season 4 (21 episodes) and I’ll be writing under the idea that they are aired the same way (two every Sunday, with the finale being aired alone. I’ll put a “-” in between episodes so you know which would have aired together). Some episodes will remain the same, some will be similar but will have changes, some will borrow ideas from real episodes, and others will be the same as episodes we actually got, just shifted to a different point in the season. Some of my episodes will be 10 minutes, others will take the whole 20.

As always, this is just for fun, I still have the greatest respect for the svtfoe team and what they created.

It’s a super long post, which is why it’s under the cut. I worked really hard on this, so any likes and reblogs are appreciated! Alright, without further ado, season 4!

Episode 1: Butterfly Follies

I found that this episode was a lovely reintroduction to the characters, so I wouldn’t change anything about it.

Episode 2: Escape From Pie Island

Honestly, it was fine. I think it tied together the “finding Moon” plot from Butterfly Follies pretty well. I’d include a little more about Festivia if anything.

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Episode 3 A: Moon Remembers

A nice episode as is, I wouldn’t change anything

Episode 3 B: Swimsuit

Also an awesome episode! One of my favourites actually, so it stays (don’t worry, we’ll get to the juicy changes soon enough)

Episode 4 A: Ransomgram

Ransomgram was a cute episode. It helped us take a break from the plot driven drama of the past few episodes. HOWEVER, I would change 1 thing. At the end, when someone has to stay in the ab dimension to repair the damage, I’d have Star do it (like she tricks Marco into leaving, closes the portal behind him, then comes out a few seconds later in Mewni). This way her age evens out with Marco’s. The way it’s currently written actually makes the age gap worse! So yeah, have Star stay behind without Marco.

Episode 4 B: Lake House Fever

A good episode, I loved seeing more of Dave and Wrathmelior, but I would start really foreshadowing that Star and Tom are about to break up. Don’t have the cute “are you an angel” exchange at the end. Instead, let them have the awkwardness of a couple who’s fallen out of love. We want to break people off their desire for Tomstar early, not super late.

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Episode 5 A: Yada Yada Berries

Who doesn’t love a good detective episode? Plus, the events of this will be important later. It stays the same

Episode 5 B: Down by the River

Similar to the original, but now have Moon actually excited to start a new Kingdom. It’s in her nature, she’s been trained to be queen her whole life, so show the establishments of the new kingdom, but with a queen who really wanted it (have her be excited when new people show up, have her eagerly establish living quarters and such).

Episode 6 A: The Ponyhead Show

Same title, different plot. Ponyhead’s new show is set to premiere with it’s first celebrity guest, Eclipsa, but someone cuts the connection. The show was supposed to be Eclipsa’s first official address to her people. This episode’s plot is the characters trying to get the connection back before their allotted time runs out. They end up succeeding and Eclipsa gets to sing her song. Also, cut all the Kelly and Marco interactions, or at least make it super obvious that they are just friends (why not give Kelly a boyfriend? One that isn’t Tad)

Episode 6 B: Surviving the Spiderbites

Perfect episode, wouldn’t change a thing. Absolutely amazing.

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Episode 7: Curse of the Blood Moon

Yeah, I cut the entirety of the original episode 7 and shifted this one up a bit, but can you really blame me? Those episodes were pointless! This episode was good, I wouldn’t change to much, however, make it really obvious that, after the curse is broken, Marco still thinks everything about Star is adorable. She could also feel the same way about him. To make room for this, cut that weird couch segment.

Episode 8 A: Princess Quasar Catepillar and the Magic Bell

This was a fun episode, and since we’ll just be coming off of a plot driven episode, let’s do something cool with Ludo!

Episode 8 B: Ghost of Butterfly Castle

Same as the actual episode, but now we learn that Mina was not only behind the Yada Yada berries, but she was also behind cutting the connection at the Ponyhead Show.

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Episode 9 A: Cornball!

Same as the actual episode we got, but without the whole “Break up buddies” thing between Marco and Kelly (remember how we cut that whole episode?) Now, we just have Marco and Kelly being friends, maybe with Marco hinting that he really likes Star and Kelly giving some relationship advice?

Episode 9 B: Meteora’s Lesson

Same title, but it’s been rewritten! So, the episode plays out the same up until they meet Toffee. In this new episode, they don’t meet Toffee at all! Instead, they travel to Skywynne directly after she destroyed the dimension. Turns out the lesson wasn’t for Meteora, it was for Skywynne. Glossaryck reassures Skywynne that everything will work out between her and her crush and, as proof, he brought her great granddaughter from the future. Skywynne is super confused and attributes the whole thing to being a hallucination caused by her dipping down for the first time (because remember, Skywynne thinks Glossaryck is dead at that point in her life). Glossaryck tries to explain that he’s real and, to prove he’s fake, Skywynne grabs her wand and is about to blast him. Meteora reacts to this and dips down to protect him (like the way it’s described in the book, out of the protection for another). Glossaryck and her go back to their own time, leaving Skywynne really confused. It ends the same way the real episode does.

Episode 10 A: The Knight Shift

I didn’t like this episode, but I like the relationship building between Marco and Star. It ends similarly with Marco saying that, no matter what, he’ll be there for Star and will visit her often. He then gets a call from his parents, leading us to...

Episode 10 B: Mariposa

A completely new episode! Marco and Star learn that his new baby brother is about to be born, so they return to Earth. Maybe there’s some trouble getting there or whatever. It would just be a cute episode, so I won’t go into huge details since they don’t matter, but it would obviously end with the baby being a girl and being called Mariposa! Star decides to stay on Earth for a few days, realizing that she feels more comfortable there than on Mewni at the moment.

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Episode 11 A: Britta’s Tacos

Pretty much the same episode we actually got. I liked it.

Episode 11 B: Beach Day

Again, same episode as what we got in the actual season. However now there is the obviousness of them slowly wanting to be a couple.

Episode 12 A: Gone Baby Gone

Pretty much the same episode because I love getting to see the teen designs for Mariposa and Meteora. However, this time it’s not Heckapoo who leaves a portal open, instead someone (doesn’t matter who) accidentally cuts a rift to the abs dimension. Also, now we’d actually get to see adult Star from when I aged her up back in ransomgram!

Episode 12 B: Sad Teen Hotline

Tom comes to visit Star on Earth and breaks up with her. It’s basically the same as the original episode, but the portals are actually being affected by their emotions (not by Heckapoo closing the portals). It ends with him coming to terms with it and is able to make a proper portal to leave.

-

Episode 13 A: Pancake Day

Similar to the episode “A Spell With No Name” from the actual series in the sense that we get to hang out with the spells again. Star’s spells are in a bit of a panic because ownership has transferred from Star to Eclipsa and they fear they may never be used again! To help ease their minds, Narwhal and Spider go out to the other rooms and interview spells from past queens (specifically spells we actually read about in the book) and they get to realize that, even if another princess doesn’t use them, they still can lead good lives inside the wand! To celebrate, the invite their new spell friends back to their room for a pancake day.

Episode 13 B: Junkin Janna

Star needs to accompany Eclipsa to a meeting with the MHC, while Tom needs help keeping his mind off his breakup with Star. Janna tags along with Star to Mewni and offers to take Tom boot sledding. Eclipsa and Star learn that there are readings of magic being emitted from the destroyed Butterfly castle (not the monster temple). Eclipsa and Star say they don’t know who it is, since neither of them had gone back. Meanwhile, Tom and Janna get attacked by the bird and we learn that Mina is creating a giant suit of armour for... something.

Episode 14: General Loveberry

A flashback episode! Yay! This episode starts the same way “Pizza Party” starts, with an introduction to rag peddler Mina meeting Solaria and the promise that Mina will be the fiercest warrior Mewni ever knew. It cuts to a scene at the meeting table (the one from “Moon the Undaunted”) with Jushtin yelling at Solaria that the idea is insane. Mina says she’ll happily risk herself to defend the kingdom, and that perhaps Mewni is lucky Jushtin never became queen. Jushtin stands up and takes Eclipsa from Solaria, saying that it’s his sister’s choice on how to proceed, but that it’s no place for a baby.

We then go through a series of cuts to the different Queens at the table. At each cut, Mina becomes a little more unstable.

We start with Queen Eclipsa and Shastacan arguing about whether to deploy the Solarians. Mina reassures Eclipsa that her armies will destroy every last monster, making Eclipsa squirm. She says that she’s the queen and her decision is final, they will not use the Solarians.

Cut to Festivia and the MHC. True to Festivia’s chapter, Rhombulus is suggesting war, Omnitraxes says to wait, Glossaryck isn’t there, and Heckapoo is being super supportive of Festivia. She decides they will go to war and Mina says her army will fight just as hard, if not harder, than when Solaria had first made them.

Cut to Dirhhennia doodling balls on a piece of paper while Festivia introduces Mina and describes all the valiant things she did. Dirhhennia looks up and shrugs, making some comment or whatever. Festivia and Mina exchange a look and it cuts to the literal same scene, but now it’s Crescenta excitedly listening to the victories of Mina. She says that, with her plans for the kingdom, Mina and the Solarians won’t need to fight, and that they can take a break, but it’s good to know they fought so hard.

Cut to Rhina asking if it’s possible for the Solarians to protect her on a trip to the Underworld. Mina explains that not many Solarians are left, and besides, their job wasn’t escort missions, they were made for battle.

Cut to Celena comforting Mina, as we learn that she is the last Solarian left.

Cut to the MHC arguing again with Estrella drawing instead of paying attention, while Mina tries to explain the benefit of another war.

Finally, we cut to Queen Comet explaining her idea for a peace treaty. Mina tries desperately to change her mind, but Comet refuses and explains how the tension between monsters has been going on for too long. She tells Mina a detailed plan for her trip to make he deal, and is then called in by Moon, who needs help figuring out a pie recipe. Comet leaves and Mina is left to think.

Under the cover of night, Mina goes out to the Monster camp. The Monsters freak out as she walks in, but she explains that she means them no harm... yet. She demands she speaks to the general (Toffee) and she gives him all the details of Comet’s travel plan. She says that a peace treaty won’t benefit either side, and he says he agrees. She tells him to do whatever he wants with that information, before she runs back into the woods.

We then get a cut to the present, where Mina is standing in the garden at night, facing statues of the previous queens that we just saw. She apologizes to Comet, saying that it was the only way to end the war once and for all. She hears footsteps behind her, and Moon appears. She says “I’m ready to help” and Mina smiles.

-

Episode 15 A: A Boy and His DC‑700XE

Again, same episode. This was a really nice, fun episode. However, any and all jokes about Tomco are removed, and instead Tom says that if Marco wants to date Star, he can.

(I want to deal with this now, because I know someone will ask. The reason I don’t want any Tomco hints is because, in this fake season, Starco is already under way. I want to minimize the shipping drama and just build as healthy a relationship as possible for Star and Marco, one that the fandom would hopefully be ok with).

Episode 15 B: Return to St. Olga’s

Eclipsa comes to Star and says that Meteora won’t stop crying and she’s not sure why. She gives Star a drawing that Meteora did, which Star immediately recognizes (it’s just a bunch of scribbles, the audience isn’t meant to know what this is but somehow Star gets it). She tells Eclipsa she knows what Meteora wants, and goes to get Marco. They then go back to St. Olga’s and we get to check in with the girls over there (they’re doing well). The details don’t really matter, but in the end they find Meteora’s old car parked out front (the one she used to live in) and in the trunk they find the dolls of Eclipsa and Globgor. They return with the dolls and Meteora begins clapping before hugging them close. Eclipsa expresses her shock, stating that she hadn’t seen those dolls in 300 hundred years. It ends with Eclipsa looking at the Globgor doll and smiling.

Episode 16: The Monster and the Queen

Similar to the real episode, but longer. It ends with Star proclaiming that Eclipsa will receive a proper coronation, and then will become the proper queen of Mewni once again.

-

Episode 17 A: Doop Doop

Same title, altered plot. Moon goes to Star and tells her to go on vacation to Earth because the stress of planning a coronation is clearly starting to get to her. Star agrees, saying it would be nice to take a break from planning. Star and Marco go through Mewni and say good bye to all their friends, ending with Doop Doop, before actually leaving for Earth. Once they’re back on Earth, Star says she forgot something and tries to open the portal, but it doesn’t work. She questions if it’s because she’s emotional, like what happened with her break up with Tom. She attempts to call Tom with the intention of having him bring the thing she forgot, but it goes to static. Her and Marco realize something is wrong with the portals.

Episode 17 B: Jannanagins

Same episode, but now Tom isn’t here.

Episode 18 A: Mama Star

Same episode, but Tom isn't here.

Episode 18 B: Ready, Aim, Fire

Similar to the real episode, but Globgor is not free yet. Star, Marco, and Janna all wake up in different places on Mewni (Doop Doop, lint catcher, and Meteora’s nursery). Marco learns that the MHC plans on freeing Globgor, then having the Solarians attack while he’s still disoriented from being freed. Moon is shocked that Star has returned, and Star goes to help Eclipsa, whose castle is under attack. Janna is staying with Meteora while Eclipsa defends her castle and her people.

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Episode 19 A: The Right Way

Star and Eclipsa defeat the one warrior (not with the total annihilation spells, just with something else). Moon shows up to help but slips up and reveals she sent Star to Earth knowing this attack would happen, and that she wanted Star away from the danger. She’s then forced to explain herself and reveals that she (Moon) made the new Solarians with the intent of getting rid of Globgor once and for all. Moon speaks of the horror stories she was told about Globgor, leading Eclipsa to speak up with the truth.

Episode 19 B: Queen of Darkness

A flashback episode, very similar to “Moon the Undaunted” from season 3. This would be the story of Meteora’s kidnapping, Globgor eating Shastacan, the attack on Spiderbite village, and Globgor’s crystallization. The whole episode would end with Eclipsa being crystallized.

Episode 20 A: Here to Help

Moon tries to reason with Mina, explaining that she was wrong about Globgor and that he was just a parent looking out for his family. She takes away the powers of the Solarians, leaving Mina as the only one left. Moon tells Mina that Eclipsa will leave with Meteora and Globgor will stay crystallized forever. Mina complains that they are all being let off too easy and tries to attack, but is held off. The group of heroes fall through a portal like they do in “Pizza Party”, and they meet Heckapoo.

Episode 20 B: The Tavern at the End of the Multiverse

Heckapoo reveals that Rhombulus and Mina are going to destroy Globgor and there’s nothing they can do, so they might as well stay safe until this whole thing blows over, then Moon and Star can return, while Eclipsa and Meteora stay in hiding. Moon is mad until she realizes this is exactly what she did to Star, and suddenly understands Star’s conviction to fight for her beliefs. Star is freaking out over the whole thing and sees Glossaryck, forcing herself into his eye. From there, she tells him she needs advice and he takes her to the grandma room. The ghosts appear similar to the actual grandma reunion scene, but this time Star asks them for help on what to do. A few of them motion to Moon’s tapestry, revealing Toffee can speak. He and Star have a civil conversation which leads to him revealing that Mina gave him the information on where to find Comet. Star turns to ask the ghosts if that’s true, but they’re gone. She sees her tapestry though, it’s her and Marco holding hands while standing on a stage. They are facing away from the audience. Facing towards the audience is Eclipsa, Globgor, and Meteora, being cheered on. Star realizes this is the coronation and that she needs to make this happen. She returns and explains that Eclipsa needs to be the true queen again. When Moon protests, Star reveals that Mina helped plot the murder of Comet. With that, Moon prepares for battle.

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Episode 21: Cornonation

The episode begins with the group of friends all backstage while Eclipsa gets ready. It’s not as huge of an auditorium because they’re trying to keep things pretty quiet so they don’t attract any unwanted attention. (At some point here, Marco can point out the typo of “Cornonation”). Eclipsa learns a string on her guitar broke and runs to go fix it. Star goes after her and finds that Globgor has escaped. It was Mina who convinced Rhombulus to let Globgor out, but they didn’t anticipate he’d be so fast and he escaped. In a panic, he crashes into the coronation stage (rather than running to the swamp) and Mina goes for the attack. At some point, we show Moon returning to Butterfly castle to get her armour, and there can be another scene where she looks at her mother’s tapestry, smiling before going out to avenge her.

At this moment at the Coronation, Eclipsa is being crystallized but suddenly breaks out her butterfly form and dips down for the first time. She and Moon join forces to do the spell with no name but now it's effects are less deadly, it simply destroys Mina’s armour (rather than flying out and melting everything else). Moon can have a cool moment where she confronts Mina about Comet.

The MHC is still fighting Globgor and we get a similar cool fight scene. Tom suddenly flies up (he was back stage with Marco) and summons the dead queens (remember how he did that with Mackie Hand?) Mina is about to deliver the final blow on Globgor, who’s been reunited with Meteora, when Solaria intercepts the blow. Mina asks her why she’s doing this and she just holds Mina’s face in her hands. “You’ve served me valiantly, Mina. But it’s time to rest.” Mina returns to her normal form and looks around and sees how innocent Globgor looks with his family. She runs off into the forest.

The dead queens take a moment to look at their family. Solaria has a touching moment with Eclipsa and her family, showing she accepts it. Jushtin can swoop in and ruffle Eclipsa’s hair, causing them all to laugh. Maybe even Festivia and meet with Eclipsa (just a silent scene), perhaps with a hug from Eclipsa to Festivia. Meanwhile, Star and Moon reunite with Comet. Star finally gets to meet Celena and apologizes to Festivia for destroying her legacy. Star then makes amends with Skywynne, to whom she confesses that she was her favourite grandma. All the queens wave goodbye and are about to leave when Eclipsa stops them. “I know that some of you aren’t my real family, but we were all Queens of Mewni. And this kind of reunion doesn’t happen every day so... will you stay for my coronation?”

It ends the same way the real episode ends, but now we see all the character’s we’ve come to know sitting in the audience (including the queens and including some earth people like Marco’s family). The credits roll as Eclipsa and Globgor continue singing an extended version of their song. The last shot of the show is Star and Marco kissing backstage, with Marco’s cheeks glowing.

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Some Final Thoughts

I hope you enjoyed! Since I have your attention, I thought I’d justify and explain some of my reasonings for making the changes that I did. If this doesn’t interest you, feel free to click away now

Ending With Globgor’s Freedom

Some of you may be wondering “Why would you free Globgor at the end?! Don’t you want to show how cute he and Eclipsa are?” I do, which is why I extended “The Monster and the Queen” and why I added another flashback episode about them. I want you to think really hard though for one second. After his freedom in the original series, what did he do? He was injured, sure, but that didn’t lead to anything. He was just sort of... there. Did you know that Globgor doesn’t say a SINGLE word in Cleaved? Yeah...

Ending With the Coronation

Think about it. Svtfoe has always been about Star being a magical princess. This is the physical proof that that point in her life is coming to an end, just as the show is coming to an end. When I first watched season 1, I kind of assumed the series would end with Star becoming Queen. After we learned that Eclipsa was still the true heir, it only felt right to end it this way.

Adding “General Loveberry”

This fan made episode was honestly just a way to give the queens voices, but it also helps flesh out Mina’s character and show her descent into madness. She has seen all her fellow solarians die, she has served every queen, give her this recognition!

Making Mina Responsible for Comet’s Death

I had seen this theory floating around, but unfortunately I don’t know who created it. However, I think it adds a valid reason for Moon to turn on Mina. In the original, Moon flips sides too much, and her only reason for betraying Mina is “I didn’t know she would go so far”. HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW THAT? In mine, Mina DOESN’T go that far. She’s ready to do her duty to get rid of Globgor, and that’s all. It’s her past actions that catch up to her.

ALSO it would show Moon that her monster bias wasn’t completely right. I didn’t elaborate too much in the above section, so I’ll do it here. I would make it very clear throughout the series that Moon kind of blames all monsters for Comet’s death, so learning it was actually a Mewman, her trusted general no less, that was truly behind it makes her rethink everything.

Swapping Toffee for Skywynne in “Meteora’s Lesson”

Reason #1 is because I want to hear her voice, and she wouldn’t be in the “General Loveberry” episode. Reason #2 is because I want to see moments of the book addressed in the show. The fact that a queen destroyed a dimension is oddly glossed over in the series. I also think that visiting a past queen is more relevant than visiting Toffee, especially in my rewrite. Originally, Toffee’s appearance felt like fan service, but it kind of reminded people that Toffee wanted magic destroyed. Well now we don’t want to destroy magic, so Toffee can have his appearances in “General Loveberry” and “The Tavern”.

Not Destroying Magic

In my opinion, destroying the magic was NOT a satisfying way to end. Magic had always been a part of this world, so to come to the decision to destroy it  ONE episode in advance, it felt awkward. Keep magic, keep the queens, but now it’s a new generation. A generation where a queen will rule hand in hand with a monster.

Changing “The Spell With No Name” to “Pancake Day”

Is it just me, or did the original episode “The Spell with No Name” feel super over hyped? Like, they foreshadow this horrible destructive spell, and then Eclipsa uses it a few episodes later but nothing happens! There’s no “Oh my corn we need to stop it!” It just flies off, doing who knows what, and it’s never addressed! With my shift to a lighter episode, we get to address something that I assume would be a very real concern for the spells (not being used) and we get to meet some other spells. This also helps ease the audience into the idea of meeting the past queens, so it doesn’t seem as weird when they pop up at the end.

Why not break up Tom and Star even earlier?

I considered breaking up Tom and Star right after the Bloodmoon curse thing, but it felt too rushed. I felt there needed to be time where they're in a relationship, but it’s clear they aren’t super pumped about it. The way I have it, we still get lots of time between their break-up and the finale, plus Star and Marco never actually confirm they are dating. It ends more on the promise of “Let’s see if this works”.

[i-am-fran]

My thoughts after ep 9.09

My thoughts on season 9 of #Suits ahead of the series finale:

So today I saw 9.09 and I think now is the right time to write a little piece about my thoughts and wishes and expectations. Why now? During the past 2 or 3 episode I have realized that I have very mixed feelings about this season. Before I start I’d like to remind you that this is how I feel about this seasons. There may be things you you agree with, other’S you don’t. I’d like to hear about them, but please be polite - it’s just an opinion. Also: While many things might sound negative, I still took the time to think and write about them. That’ how invested I am in this show. I wouldn’t bother doing that for a show I don’t enjoy watching. The thing is: The more I like a character, the harder I judge how they are developed. No hard feelings.

First, I have to admit that I had very high expectations after 8.16. I did not particularly like season 8, not because Mike and Rachel left and not because of the introduction of Alex and Samantha (who I think were both very refreshing additions to the cast), but because I felt that Harvey and Donna in particular seemed to be stuck in some kind of limbo in regards to character development for the first 14 episodes. The Kessler romance that somewhat triggered the “Darvey” romance felt rushed in the end of season 8, even though I had wanted for this to happen for so long.

9.01 started so promising and I really enjoyed the introduction of Faye. I loved the fun moments with Louis being Louis, just the way they happened in the early seasons. All in all, Louis is the one character I am most pleased with in regards to character and storyline. Everything seems seamlessly consistent with him.

Harvey I also really can’t complain about. His character development has stretched over the entirety of nine seasons and it is natural that now things are slowly winding down.

The character development I am most unhappy about is Donna. It seems to me that all season her sole purpose was to serve Harvey coffee. There were some sweet moments with Louis and some confrontations with Faye and the other partners, but let’s face it: The only storyline that she really had next to being Harvey’s sidekick was her Dad and Faye being unhappy about her relationship with Harvey, which was one of the subplots of “Cairo”. It reminded me a little of the early seasons when Donna barely had any other purpose than being Harvey’s know-it-all secretary, but not in a good way. It felt like Alex, Katrina and even Esther had more significant plots this season, though they were similar in their length regarding screen time.

However this isn’t the first time I am unhappy with Donna’s character development. Despite Donna being my favorite Suits character -hands down-  I’m still super irked about her unrealistic leap from secretary to COO. As a woman in a business where most my co-workers are men I hate to see when TV gets women’s hopes up in how this could happen. To me, it feels like Donna slept her way to her position without actually sleeping with her boss. The circumstances are -in my eyes- the same, which is why I hate it. This isn’t gender equality, because no secretary, be it male or female does get promoted to COO without taking a few more steps in between. This only happens in fairytales.  Donna has no qualification to be COO at all and I would have felt much differently about the situation if the plot would have been Donna taking her seed money to go to business school. Or some twist in the story with Donna revealing her MBA certificate saying “Actually, those Pilates classes I allegedly take every Friday afternoon were college courses. Here’s my degree. Promote me.” And the worst of it all: Donna changed. The way she spoke to people changed, the way she dressed changed and in the end she was a Jessica/Donna hybrid I could hardy recognize as the quirky secretary she used to be. For me part of her charm was the amount of power she had by just “working from Harvey’s desk”. But I’m rambling- this ship sailed long ago.

Back to season 9. I had hope, now that she was in a relationship with Harvey, we would get a more domestic side of her, get a glimpse of her private life. What’s with that reveal of an older sister that was neither here or there or in any way relevant to the plot? I don’t know about you, but Donna always gave me this ‘only-child’ vibe. Which is probably why her sister was explained away as “much older”. However, why did they cast a woman who is only 11 years older than Sarah Rafferty as her mom? While I think season 9 Donna is probably several years younger than Sarah because the seasons only appear to be spanning around 6 months or so (considering how long Sheila was pregnant, the time it took Rachel to get her postgraduate degree and so on) and one could argue that Donna’s mom is therefore some years older than the actress who portrays her it would still be the case that Donna’s mom had her in her early twenties at the latest. When would she have had a much older sister? At 16? Unnecessary plot hole/irregularity. Kudos however for explaining away how Donna’s parents seemed to be married when Harvey let them stay at his condo once, then were seemingly separated during the “god-awful dinner party” (some people argue it must have been Donna’s “loser” boyfriend, but why would have Harvey been there in that case?). Clarification finally came: They were separated but got back together. Brownie points for plot consistency.

Some casual outfits made an appearance, which was an important first step, but they still felt a little forced. I mean, what’s the thing in American TV shows to have the woman wearing PJs with perfectly coiffed hair, fake lashes and full make-up? In the season 2 scenes where Harvey and Mike visited Donna after she was fired she was not only dressed casually, her face and hair were noticeably dressed down as well. I would have liked that a lot to make it more realistic. And the jammies disappeared after episode 1. There are several morning scenes with Harvey and Donna were both are already fully dressed for work (apart from Donna being barefoot at some times (jeez, if I wore those heels I’d be barefoot the second I’d enter the apartment). I think it made those scenes more sterile and less domestic despite the sweet dialogues. I think I would have liked it better, if there was a little more slouching, touching, maybe a TV running, or one of them sitting on the crumpled bed. Less superhero, more normal, that’s what I would have liked. And what’s with the no-touching anyways? I would have understood if it was only the office scenes, because I do believe neither of the character’s to be big on PDA, especially at work. But at home? Politely sitting next to each other, no leaning in, no touching, no hugging. Just talking. Like old times. I would have liked to see more of them being a couple. Sure, there were some pretty intense romantic scenes like in Mike’s apartment and with Lily and the painting, but the small moments that surrounded those big Darvey scenes were pretty underwhelming. Well, at least Harvey’s bathrobe made an appearance in 9.09 so there is still hopes for some normalcy in 9.10. It’s not an issue of screen time. Even as a Darvey shipper I was aware s9 would not turn into the “Darvey show”, it’s the content of some of the small scenes that disappointed me. Okay, no more Donna or Darvey bashing. Did I mention I’m actually a Darvey shipper?

One more thing: Why is everyone in this show dying of heart attacks. I understand why Lily had to die in terms of the storyline. But a heart attack? What are the odds of both slim and fit parents dying untimely of a heart attack? Could the writers not think of other sudden causes of deaths? She could have an aneurysm, get hit by a car, been diagnosed with a fatal cancer without Harvey knowing and so on and so on. Also: In the very same episode Sutter also died: Cause: Heart attack! If that’s where the writer’s creativity is heading it’s probably best we are nearing the end. If this unfortunate accumulation of heart attack was created on purpose, I do not get the reason why. 

Another hope I had for s9: A Jessica cameo. My hope was for a small storyline that would be addressed in both Pearson and Suits in order to gain more attraction for the new show. Plus I love Jessica. With so many loose ends to tie up in 9.10 I doubt there will be time for a proper Jessica Pearson appearance other than being a guest to Louis wedding, if she appears at all. Can we please talk about the wedding? Why does Louis get a baby AND a wedding in one season? He was engaged twice before. Even Mike and Rachel technically had two wedding scenes (one in s5 and one in 7). At least it looks like we still get a Darvey proposal. While I agree with Sarah Rafferty that a big white wedding shouldn’t be the conclusion of her character, I had –albeit a small- hope that there would be unconventional quick nuptials somewhere around episode 6 or 7 instead of that almost proposal. Taking Harvey’s character development into context I would find that Harvey creating a family on his own more important than a Darvey wedding. We already know those two are endgame. And while I think another pregnancy would be cheesy and far too rushed in this short span of episodes I still hold out a little hope that there will be a moment shared between Harvey and Donna that alludes to the idea that they’ll go into the baby-making business soon. Maybe when Sheila goes into labour? Not sure that will als still happen in 9.10.

In order not to have to finish this little article on a  negative note: There are things I really really liked. Samantha’s storylines, Mike’s cameo in 9.09 (though he was such a douche in 9.05), the phone calls with Lily, the mock trial and Sheila’s change of heart about her career. Been glad we did not spend more than one ep on the Katrina/Brian romance. Thank you.