#but lowkey im second guessing the more i watch it idk why

[day-mark]

dreamWink

[hijackalx]

ASTARION NSFW ALPHABET

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

hes such a dick if ur a one night stand LMAO understandably tho. understandably..... but yeah if hes not really feeling u he just kind of dips out after coming up with some wack ass rehearsed excuse to protect ur feelings. totally different story if he loves u though. i feel like he gets sooo lovey-dovey post nut OMG like soo much praise and so many kisses. post nut clarity with his S/O consists of him enjoying the many wonders of the world 😭😭  that shit will have him watching the sunset

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

i think he likes his hands. i mean its one of the things he can see so like. but they are really nice. long and nimble fingers and smooth palms. his hands look like poetry lowkey. anyway if ur AFAB he loves titties. any titty. loves to mark them up and watch them bounce while u ride him. if ur AMAB its ur shoulder/collarbone area especially if its dainty and delicate looking but regardless he wants to bite around there. youll see him looking at them a lot

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he wants to come on ur face or inside u. his two go-tos. if hes about to nut he'll ask u really quick which u want and u have like 3 seconds to answer LMAO. takes a while to get to that point tho so u have some time to think about it beforehand 😭😭

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he got hard asf the first time u let him drink from u LMAOO he walked away and jerked off IMMEDIATELY

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

hundreds of years of experience is enough for me yeah

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

oooooooooooo gurl. ugh hold on theres so many it could be. ok so theres two. 1. he likes to sit u in his lap (the back of ur head on his shoulder or maybe even sitting sideways with ur legs off the side ??? idk however yall want) and finger/jerk u off. it makes him feel sooo in control 🤤 and 2. he lovesss eye contact so any positions where he can stare into ur soul 👁️👁️ yall why am i only seeing missionary rn...... or planking i guess lol

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

i think hes pretty serious. he might even get pissed off if u start acting too goofy lol like hes playful but not going to start cracking jokes 😹😹

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

this pains me to say...... but i dont think elves get body hair if any (like canonically)....... but i think its weird to be completely bald so im going to say hes got a little bit of pubic hair, armpit hair, and of course leg/arm hair. its just not very long or thick. he basically never has to trim or anything

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

my boy is a romantic at heart yall. will kiss u a lot and hold u very close. i think its rlly important for him to have some sort of emotional connection thru sex.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

honestly dont feel like he ever does normally LMAO when u reject him or push him away during the first romance scene and he says he'll go beat off i think hes just saying that to make u feel bad 😹😭  when u let him drink from u it was probably the first time he jerked off in a longggg time. i can see him thinking hes above doing something like that lol so its an ego thing

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

ok did u guys see the little church looking building at the first campsite in act 3??? i think if yall were to smash there he'd never forget it. like something about that turns him on so much. probably bent u over the altar. even after u guys are long gone he still thinks abt it.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

suck on his fingers omg. but also really likes to use sex to put u in ur place so if u guys argue or just dont get along at some point he will use that as a build up to sex. so he will purposely push ur buttons A LOT. cuz its like, how dare u raise ur voice at him ?? 😤

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

if u dont go along with what he wants to do he kind of gets pissy after a while. he only ever really wants to be in control and thats it. also wont do anything extreme or ridiculous either 😭😭 anything that makes him feel humiliated is a big no

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

for AFAB like ive said before he is the self-proclaimed coochie eating champion of faerun. sooooo good at it its not funny. will also kiss it and leave more kisses/bites on ur thighs. makes u feel like ur coochie is the most divine coochie in the world LMAO omg also will want to eat u out every time ur on ur period......... i think thats like one thing he will absolutely beg for OOP

if ur AMAB its basically the same just with a dick lol

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he can do both. probably likes to be a little rougher than most people though

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

yeah if hes in the mood i can see him scouting the area for a place to smash LMAO which probably happens pretty often. doesnt mind giving up the romantic aspect as long as yall still fuck for real every once in a while.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

i think he would need to be convinced. willing to hear u out at least

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

TOO LONG. HE LASTS WAY TOO LONG. i mean after u been suckin and fuckin for that many years how do u not take forever to nut 😭😭  u will get urs tho dont worry. also perfect situation for u to have multiple orgasms so dont get discouraged besties 🤘🏻

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

allllll the timeeeee. he wants u to need him more than anything else before he fucks u. u need to need this man like u need oxygen. like a fish needs water. like a plant needs the sun. like a

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

grunts and groans but when he gets closer to finishing he'll start moaning. he doesnt make an effort to stay quiet but also wont do anything embarrassing 😹

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

emmmmm i wanna say he can go a pretty long time without sex. but if he has a partner he is sexually attracted to his libido can be pretty high. but lets remember he is getting into his erectile dysfunction years ☝🏻 JOKINGGGG LMAO

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

well he meditates technically. but he gets into that lil meditation pose fast as fuck boy 🧘 do not interrupt him either he'll be grumpy 😭

[jasongotdrip]

dawg what was I doing at 3 am💀🙏

i’ve NEVER drawn blitz before so this was strictly an experiment please i hate it so much… in the show WHY IS HIS HEAD BUILT LIKE THAT.. i lowkey wanted to give him hair out of spite. I don’t really like stolas that much but if i say anything more ill yap for eternity

don’t mind the background i got off pinterest

Also.. other random things I guess because im not making multiple posts🙄

Not me hyperfixating on a drunk grumpy gacha life oc looking ahh cat😭😭

i love the au’s people make of him, like overlord husk owns my soul (pun intended)

this drawing is not overlord husk but I might draw that soon, idk. I just wanted to see him in shades, and I wanted to practice drawing him

AND WHAT THE SIGMA?? 9K views in 2 days is CRAZY. ABSOLUTELY INSANE. I got like 30 subscribers from it which is even crazier. From like, a 10 second video of a hybrid princess and a snake inventor. This is my life now. I’ll cherish this 🥹 BUT SERIOUSLY THANK YOU LIKE THATS THE LAST THING I EXPECTED TO HAPPEN WHEN I POSTED THAT😭😭

—

also I’m working on 2 things but im losing motivation- one more than the other. Of course.. one of them is hazbin, but the other is helluva so.. yeah. I’ll most likely finish the helluva one first, bc the hazbin one is angst. I don’t like angst i just had an idea to do it

Also i kinda want to draw someone from spiderverse.. (maybe miles or pav🙈 ) - or miraculous, maybe. That show had so much potential but it keeps going in circles, like.. And now season 6 will have new designs. I used to be so obsessed with that show like I watched it DURING NEW YEARS with my sister a long time ago😭

I’m yapping so uhhh bye

[distantdreamboy]

women's royal rumble thoughts as I watch

(rather than a separate post for each thoughts, I smoked so these should be funny)

good on liv for knocking lyra away so she could fix her wardrobe malfunction

they're keeping a steady pace right now so I feel like it'll get crazy

C'mon B-Fab! Cause EYE...BEE FAB!! Didn't know she was colombian, colombia stand tf up.

Ivy nile is so good and has a great look but i'm not gagging over her just yet. excited for her to get over with the crowds

"the sniper" is a perfect nickname for zoey stark, she should lean into the combat thing with pfc for sure, trademark that dropkick

LASH MF LEGENDDDDD MY GIRLLL

b-fab cracking me up talmbout "you think you big im big too baby"

bianca is great, very much the black john cena. I don't always gag but I expect wins so I respect her--ok the backflip gagged me

and so did the second one

damn and the fourth

so now everybody doing kip-ups? they stealing naomi's nachos

I want so much more for shayna baszler, love her down

liv morgan got kneed tf in her face TWICE lol

GREAT recovery by Zoey idc

ivy doing lyra's hand pose was JOKES

bayley finally got her look together but she needa cut that theme intro and flesh out her character a bit more ------------

Idk, i'm not gagging at the entrants so far

glad the bayley iyo staredown got a pop

sonya looks great and the theme hits

why is zoey not matching her teammates, solo era?

maxxine doesnt move me but she ate that lil entrance pose or whatever

her gears are FAB though, especially this one

NAOMIIII YOU HEARD THAT POP FOR MY MOTHER???

AND THAT GEAR IS FAB FUCK WHATCHU HEARD

bianca calling "pam" to get bayley to her spot was cute

WAIT WHO TOOK OUT JADE?

naomi the bangssss girl cmon now

JAIDA PARKER??? Lets go! Good for her, needs a better theme but she looks great

damn I could tell they expected a bigger pop for her...no "nxt" chants smh

that spot with the brown girls and chelsea was HILARIOUS

I love me some chelsea green, cant lie

piper niven is the goattttt -------------

natalya looks SO GOOD, I had to put my food and and clap. she's a legend but I wouldn't mind seeing her have a top girl moment

I wasn't feeling jordynne grace but this new hairstyle changed my mind ngl. everyone tries to lift the big girls but jordynne actually did it clean

naomi needed to give it more time before her staredown with jordynne

NAHHH ALEXA BLISS GAGGED ME!!! I WAS QUIET FOR ODEE LONG!! AND SHES SPOOKY I WONNN

Oh zelinas look is gaggyyyy...shes so fine. watched her in tna and as a true capricorn she got finer with time

avalance code red gagged me bad

love candice lerae's theme. she deserves to be over but that pixie shit is lowkey tired

TRISH STRATUS????? MOTHERR!!!!??? CRYING (should had some cute boots to complete the fab gear

charlotte looks GOOD my goodness!! she's the company's safe choice but she's so incredibly talented and I enjoy her cant lie

lmaoo? she saw piper and said 'oh you want some bitch?' ---------

giulua's great but I dont gag for her idk

NIKKI BELLAAAAA and she got her inchesssss

why am I hearing them call out spots :/

nia eliminating all them people at once was a copout.

charlotte flair is aunt but :/ so many women were working for a moment all year. I guess favor aint fair so shout out to her!

[elizabeth-mitchells]

this a such an interesting ask (no shade) because i don’t see lottienat being a big ship in the fandom if im being honest. (also why are we censoring lottienat /genq /cur)

i see the show revolving heavily around jackieshauna since the get go, i mean even doing re watches there’s so much more chemistry with jackieshauna than lottienat. but i love lottienat, i love the dynamic the two has (especially in s2 as you mentioned). i think their friendship is different from the other girls, because nat was the most level headed (most of the time) when it came to lottie, jsut fed up with her weird delusions for a while (until the decline ofc)

i think it’s less to be be romantic (though i love shipping them as gfs) and it gives off more regression vibes . like the scene of young nat laying into older lottie’s lap after everything - knowing that even though all the chaos and noise lottie is still that safe spot for despite all her flaws and what she saw in the wildnerness

i think they both tie to each other because they are just ultimately doomed characters (as seen in current season, no spoilers promise!) and i think that they have that special bond, where no one really sees them for who they are, just what they could be. (does that make sense?)

such a great point about taivan — THE cannon ship in the show and it gets the least amount of recognition, mostly because i’m sure tai is black and we have to always share racist undertones (not at you!)

i also lowkey love lottiemistynat, but i be shipping all the girls together honestly. idk, i think we can let ppl ship what they want!!!!

oh i guess it totally depends on each person's experience and perspective and who we follow! (oh and i was censoring it because i'm being critical of the ship and i didn't want it showing up on the tags bc people probably don't want to see that there)

but i do think that, objectively speaking, there's not denying that lottienat became one of the most popular ships of the show if not The most popular one. i can't check the tumblr tags right now to avoid spoilers for the new eps, but i bet that like 5/10 posts on a regular day are about this ship or at least mention it. i mean fuck sometimes the lottielee tag is flooded with posts about lottienat?? and it's literally the second one with the most fics on ao3 and closing in on jackieshauna even though like you said and i said, jackieshauna is kinda the central one to the plot

and like. i mean i get it. i totally see why people ship lottienat. i do, i even wrote a couple fics about them too, i ship all the girls too. but anon's question was why is that one ship so popular. you pointed out a few valid reasons but it's nothing more interesting or more special than anything you could say about literally any other ship of the show. all the friendships between all the girls are different from each other, they're all doomed characters, they all have special bonds. even you said you see it as less romantic. so that only makes me wonder even more. why did it take over so hard

[thegeminisage]

i don't know how i'm supposed to simply do a tng update when there was SPOCK but obviously last night (tonight as i type this, but it's late, so this post is going up while i'm at work) we watched unification part i & part ii

tng update:

🌈SPOCK🌈

okay, i'm normal again

part i: BITTERLY disappointed that all we got out of this episode spockwise was one blurry photo and him coming in right at the end. i had a feeling they'd do that. i guess now i have to talk about the nonimportant nonspock parts of this episode 🥱

ive decided i hate sarek's new wife. what business is it of hers if spock objects to sarek in public? if sarek didn't have a problem with it why make one? evil stepmother fr. why did sarek marry another human anyway does he have a fucking fetish or something...at least she was too old to get knocked up. i was reading about ages on the wiki today and amanda was only TWENTY YEARS OLD when she had spock. sarek would have been 65. i know vulcans age way different so it's not as creepy but STILL. girl, wait until you are old enough to drink

speaking of sarek...i went back and forth feeling terrible for him and wanting to attack him with my bare hands. under one hand he is on his deathbed and obviously very ill and miserable and suffering deep regrets over past mistakes and it's hard not to have sympathy...on the other, maybe if you wanted less deathbed regrets about your relationship with spock YOU SHOULD HAVE TREATED HIM BETTER! bitch.

also, whatever he and picard had going on was homoerotic. "we're part of each other" why do they talk about the mind meld that way in tng and not in tos. why did picard feel up sarek's hand on his deathbed the second his wife looked away. hes got a history of homewrecking since he (i know) had his affair baby wesley with beverly. so Whats Going On

picard forcefully obtaining the klingon ship. i LOVE when he gets to be a bitch

ROMULAN RACEFAKING??? a proud star trek tradition at this point i guess but it was truly awful to behold. DEEPLY disappointed sela did not later lick the paint off his ears as the klingons implied she would. smh

i like also how riker blew up that whole ship and nobody batted an eyelash. he really can just do whatever

part ii: SPOCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the first time i cried was when spock himself came onscreen at the end of part i. then just as soon as i collected myself he mentioned jim kirk twice in the space of 30 seconds and i lost it again. we are literally bridging the gap between tos spock and spock prime from aos rn and i Dont like it.

Very Sad his dad kicked it before they could reconcile. but i saw his microexpressions when picard delivered the news. i missed them more than you can possibly imagine

i did love though that he started viewing picard as like a proxy sarek. imagine having daddy issues with a guy who is 75 years younger than you. lowkey they also had a little homoeroticism happening. "cowboy diplomacy" sure whatever

riker and the four-armed pianist 10/10 i hope they fucked. i'm so glad we wont he riker roulette and it wasn't creepy. also only riker could successfully flirt with a women after killing her husband in a spaceship battle <3

i'm a little iffy on spock's uhhh whole deal in this episode. he's lik yeah i chose the vulcan way of life these romulans are gonna have way better lives after their vulcan enlightenment but meanwhile he's criticizing sarek for his obsession with logic to the exclusion of all emotion (which is what he decided in tmp, that you need both) and also the vulcan way of life has done huge damage to his relationship with his father as well. so which is it?? idk, maybe he's not doing well because of sarek dying and all but he seemed like he was in a very "im not willing to acknowledge that i have emotions because rn theyre causing me pain" sort of mood. buddy :(

then again, it IS a tng script. we can only expect so much. it wasn't so inconsistent that it took me out of the episode but it did bother me a little because i just don't understand why he's willing to devote the rest of his life to this cause...he seemed to imply he had emotional reasons but what were they?? we will quite literally never know.

what's wack to me also is that in nineteen years romulus is gonna be GONE. like it's just going to be gone. eaten up by the sun or whatever. if someone had a baby right now on romulus that baby would not be old enough to drink before the sun swallowed them. so everything spock is doing is for nothing.

sela in this episode was really funny. "i hate vulcans." so true queen. i mean i don't care about her at all but that was hilarious

data doing the vulcan nerve pinch!!!!!!! that was so fun. i don't think it requires telepathy to do, just super strength, but i guess if you do then that makes no sense. it made me happy though.

the end when spock melded with picard to quasi-meld with his father and almost wept was me crying for the third time...i couldn't stand seeing him cry!!!!!! i can't believe sarek really just died without ever reconciling with him but i kind of like it better this way bc what sarek did was his own fault not spock's. so spock got closure and sarek. didn't. rip dude

okay. this concludes. the SPOCK UPDATE. tonight: a matter of time. and TOMORROW........the undiscovered country. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[delulu-just-a-bit]

Fuck fuck fuck im pushing him to much. Call me crazy but I just became obsessed with a random person on discord and idk we clicked right away and he friended me and messaged me first. I don’t even know how our relationship came to be. Whatever that is. Basically I joined his like nation or whatever and we barely talked at first. But then idk cute moments would happen like I scared him a couple of times by just sneaking up on him or watching him from the distance until he noticed me (in Minecraft yall) and then he tried to scare me back lol he like only got me three times. Anyways when our nation got griefed he rebuilt my dock and my bridge to my flower garden and when I was struggling to take down my burnt house he ( which he wasn’t supposed to do lol) went into operator mode and got rid of it with commands. And when I built my second house he made like a dining set I guess ( two stairs as chairs and a block in the middle) and we pretended to sit down and idk it was like a nice date kinda thing (I’m being delusional I’m realizing as I write this) but it was more idk intimate when it happened (I’m delusional)

Anyways the we got griefed again and we both kinda just stopped playing in that realm but then he invited me to another realm but it was being revamped so we couldn’t play yet. But I took this chance to talk to to him more since he friended me and stuff. It was alright at first but then I started sending risky memes like a sexy traffic cone getting tied up and whipped . And he said he was gonna do that to me (I know so funny) and I said bet and sent him more. See where this is going. So basically for like three days starting at like 12 am or 1 am I we just I guess talked dirty. Which he says I started the sexting but I’m pretty sure he did 😙.

But what I’m trying to get at is I think I’m moving too fast. Actually today he said that he was going on a date with a girl. I don’t know if he was trying to make me jealous but I was. The date didn’t go well thank god. But at the end of the day to day I was like we should be husbando and wifey and idk if he was just being polite and going with it cause now I feel like he as pulled back. (He didn’t call me wifey ) fuck fuck fuck

I think I’m bothering him too much. Maybe he doesn’t like me as much as I think he does. Plus idk he was being an ass ( I got butt hurt when he said he wouldn’t fuck me if I wasn’t pretty)

I don’t think I’m pretty but it would hurt so much if he doesn’t think I’m pretty. Idk why I want him so bad. I even wrote in my notes what I wanted to say to him.

“Well I’m just scared you might not talk to me anymore and idk why but that would really suck if I wouldn’t be able to talk to you anymore. Actually I think I go a lil crazy when I don’t talk to you. I kinda just want all your attention and your mind filled with me but that’s asking for way too much because we only just started talking . That’s too crazy to ask of you. I don’t even know your last name yet. I don’t even know what you look like but idk maybe I’m getting lowkey obsessed because you make me laugh and smile . I’m sorry if I bother you to much I just want to know you.”

I didn’t send it of course but I think I’d scare him away if I did. I just want to spill my guts and I’m scared he won’t like me anymore or reciprocate my feelings. Maybe I need a break. Fuck

Honestly this could all be hormones right now. I pray I’m just ovulating.

[jrueships]

35:10 - 1:15:13 🤧 imma be honest, im lowkey here for the tatman sauce content. it's a bit sad but it's what sad little rarepair crackship enjoyers like me must do to survive 😭

i think im gonna take this 30 at a time and then in the last reblog finally tag up n add some more info idk! We will see where the night takes us!

Tat man just singing away as sauce tries not to cry beneath him 😭 this shit hilarious

Sauce contemplating baldness??? Chat thinks he's going bald or smthing bcs hes been rocking that beanie forever like reeces cup kd. Didn't teach him to stop wearing that beanie sadly 🙄. Sauce wondering if he should go bald and get tats on his head .... id cry

Kyle corrects a chatter's Grammar. Heard does not equal hard

Sauce wanting to show the viewers his face now... starting to groan more frequently now 😣 this shit is heard (hard* -kyle)

I sped forward some bcs the sound kept cutting in n out but he's still on the same side of his neck so idc. Apparently Sauce has not seen All American or hasnt seen it in a while, idk i cant hear over this stupid music 😭. I heard it went downhill on some tubi shit like bmf so it's a lost cause tbh

Feels like watching some boring ass p*rno where they stay in the same position doing much abt nothing 😐. Kiss or smthin 😑 cmon

At 59:36 with some skipping.. sauces beloved 'females' who he let's in his far more beloved sauce world for free are asking kyle to take some pity on the poor sauce. 'Let him take a break...' LOL. He's their knight in shining tat ink.

There's some more stuff that happened way later, Kyle asked who been in chat since he started.. surprisingly some!! The attention span is insane

Ok We're in hour 1 now so just remember that. I'm not gonna write that whole thing out or I'll get confused 😭 im just gonna write the minutes and the seconds, just imagine the 1 in front of it

1:44 Chat: You Muslim Sauce?

SG: no i'm Not 😑😤😑 !

Chat: I was finna ask that 😭 laugh emoji (i am not putting that in my recent section on my phone)

Chat: I thought he was Muslim bc of his name laugh emoji x3 (ahmad) (tbh me too)

Sg: a lot of people think that 😒

Chat sometime later: Sauce leaking (in response to an ask if he was bleeding)

10:39, Sauce getting a bit overwhelmed by the pain. Whines, groans.

Sg: how long you think it's gonna be ��😭

K: *unintelligible*

Sg: *groans*

11:37: WE RANDOMLY CUT TO SAUCE WATCHING SPED UP TIKTOKS ON HIS PHONE??? He has it facing the screen so we can see like We're inside his mind 😭 is this saucevision? I'm scared 😭😭

Omg. PLOTTWIST??? IT WAS KYLE'S HAND HOLDING THE PHONE AND WATCHING THE WEIRD TIKTOKS THAT WERE AKIN TO AN ELSA GOES TO THE DENTIST APPS LMAO??? Why was he showing us that 😭??????? It's like they're coparenting the chat or something. Gen Z babysitters.

Chat after being shown some weird dentist video of a woman getting her teeth done thanks to kyle????'s phone sharing generosity??: what.

Wth

Is that woo lady?

What did I just see.

Kyle: hahahaa YEAA her teeth were FUCKED up! hahaaa talm bout what did i JUST see hehehehehaha

Sauce enters the room. Apparently he left kyle in the room alone with us so he can get some food I think?? And I guess he told him to entertain the chat (kid) while he was gone by showing us the games he got on his phone (traumatizing tiktok video)

Kyle laughs and shares his very funny moment with sauce about traumatizing the local saucelings, quite amused. Sauce falls to his knees and contemplates whether life is worth it, as he is in pain. He cannot protect the saucelings from tatman and his weird dentist videos. He is too weak.

Chat: I see ur rib cage (?????? J*F D*HMER IN THE CHAT????? SAUCE GET DOWN!!)

Sauce comes back bearing gifts though, he got em both Gatorade then hands Kyle a hot cheetos bag. Then seal for the tat. While checking himself and his tat out on the camera the whole time (shirtless, of course)

He then brags about feeding his tat man lol, such a humanitarian 🥰 empath king

Chat complains about not being offered any

Sg: chat yall want some hot cheetos 🤨? Want some Gatorade?

K: *holds hot cheeto bag up in front of camera/in corner of it* yall want some :] ?

SAUCES LEFT ARM MUSCLE KEEPS TWITCHING FROM THE PAIN???? AND THEN HIS LEFT BOOB STARTS JUMPING UM. WHY ARE WE RIGHT IN THE LINE OF FIRE TO SEE THIS. IM SCARED. That left arm is dancing man, cus he got the neck tat on that side. That's crazy.

Chat: Damn your(e) so hot. I'm a guy

K: aw hell naw they talkin crazy 😳 (inch resting of you to notice that one comment specifically.... hmm.)

OKAY PAUSING AT 1:15:13 RQ. ILL BE BACK

taking lil notes on the sauce getting a tat stream.... will be reblogging with more bcs this video is fucking long as shit plus with me always pausing to write whatever nonsense i find funny? yea, idk if ill be able to get thru this all lmao 😭 but yea this will just be lil blurbs rewritten n commented on as i watch on one device and take notes on another like a lil movie major or smthin LMAO. To shorten typing time, Sauce will be SG and tat man will just be K as his real name is Kyle. ok? ok

SG, impatient & cocky, trying to show out 4 the stream like a little loser: ay cmon bruh im ready 😤!!🤘🏿 *goes to lay down on the jets styled?? tatting bed??? idk what that is i don't get tats.. i just know they probably fucked on it cus sauce winced when he had to sit down LMAO. went from ay bruh im ready to EUAGH 😫!! Eh 😣😖!! in a millisecond LMFAO*

K: *checks himself out on camera for a split second*

K: *very polite to the stream's viewing. Apparently has never streamed or got an audience up close n personal during his tat sessions. Only shows the before and after photos so this is a new but very fun experience for him. aww, so cute <3 sauce getting him to try new things!!!! He's nervous about getting the best angles for us and he's always trying his best to please!! ( he's so service top it's Mad. it's MADDENIN!!! ) Sauce dramatic diva demanding hot n s*x fierce reporter mean fake bitch and his quiet polite and personable yet professionally firm, keeping sauce in line when he needs to fulltime cameraman part time bodyguard when the situation gets unexpectedly (or expectedly. Not everyone has Tat man's insanely loyal patience with sauce...) hostile WHEN??? Slowburn We're just workers/he's just my minion to ........... don't ask why we came out of the same bathroom at the same time STFU ?? HELLO??? TAT MAN!!!*

Chat: cook up kyle

Kyle: !! :] !! yea 😺!! im boutta cook 🥰 (HE KEEPS GETTING SO SWEETLY HYPED UP FROM SAUCES LIL AUDIENCE. IT'S SO CUTE LOL)

1:05 (around there idk none of these time stamps will be any accurate bcs i pause late after realizing smthin was funny then guestimate where it started so sorry :( ): sauce walking his big b00bies up in our face jumpscare :/ . To help Kyle zoom the camera per his chats demands. He lowkey high key very anxious and micromanaging abt kyle using his camera equipment lol. He just loves telling people what to do but also that shit is probably very expensive. But cmon sauce. Kyle the cameraman's got it!!! HE EVEN HAS THE PERFECT CAMERAMAN NAME LIKE?? Let him take care of you bbygirl ..😼

Sauce once again (a bit more gingerly this time) sits himself on his jets style seat thing and let's out a little cry of pain when his ass hits it??? sauce these bttm allegations are BEATING ur ASS lmao????

Kyle does what sauce was about to do for him and sauce kinda :/// >:( 😰😰😠. Sauce try to go five seconds without micromanaging challenge impossible. Complains about chat being able to see his facial expressions being too close up now and how he won't be able to fuck with Kyle no more cus of it cus they'll make shit is weird. Kyle simply responds ' That's love 🙂. '

Sauce goads the chat asking if he should end stream. Kyle at first thinks maybe he isn't cameramanning right and gets a little nervous/sad at disappointing sauce but quickly catches onto the strategy and joins in on the bait. The chat take it with a chorus of Nos. Girlboss sauce malewife Tat man media powercouple ftw?

2:58, K: wait turn ur head a lil bit? *Sauce looks at him* no, other way *sauce looks away, exposing neck to him and pre-ink*

K admires his work. Shows it off to the chat, tells them he's getting them right. Zooms in on sauce's neck

SOMEBODY SAID 'L NIPPLE' IN THE CHAT WHAT???? Chat language is so.... beautiful 😭

'Stop being a lil girl take the pain like a man'????? Yall sure this is twitch and not p*rnhub ??? tf?

Kyle zooms in. Chat: "glad to get the nipple off the page" HELP. my thoughts exactly

Kyle tries hiding sauces face with his zooms bcs he knows sauce was self conscious about his expressions lmao. Chat, instantly, and these are different people too. Everyone is a sadist here apparently. My kinda people 😼: 'WE NEED TO SEE HIS FACE FR' 'HIS FACE BRO WE NEED TO SEE HIS FACE' 'WE NEED TO SEE HIS FACE IF HE CRIES'

3:38 Sauce, reading the chat bcs if he doesn't have attention that he can feel for five seconds he explodes and dies: is my face in there ? <- literally just whined about not wanting his face seen bcs he'd get weird comments and ruin his very heterosexual very platonic relationship with tat man. But is now turning his whole tune around for some shred of people pleasing attention omg 🙄 poo fimbly 😑

K: nah they be clownin 😿.. *just wants to protect him*

Sauce agrees a bit then quickly changes subject to compliment himself.

Sauce notices camera needs shifting so he tries but Kyle's on it before he can. Sauce keeps trying anyways until eventually the needles settle him slougish

5:10 chat tells them to zoom out but sauce defends his cameraman: AINT NO ZOOM OUT 😾😾!! HE TRYNA GIVE YOU THE UPCLOSE LOOKS !!

Kyle zooms out anyways

Sauce whines about his nipple lol

Sg: yall weird af 😑 Yall tryna see my nipple or smthin 🤨? *incredulous look to camera*

K: FREE THE NIP!!!!! <- reading off chat, sadly

THE CHAT BULLIED HIM INTO HIDING HIS BOOBS LMAO. He got a blanket 😭 so now he's gonna be with another man... while under a blanket ? um. sauce I think this is pretty lose lose if u ask me .

Kyle wearing those black tattoo gloves gently touching sauces neck.... soft dom and not even trying to hide it 🤨?

Chat: stop moaning 😐

Sauce: my bad bruh 😔

Someone: get the tissues ready (????)

Sg: in da trenches 😼. in da trenches 😼

Someone in chat: sauce do u like when men fuck u? ( 🤔.. it's a fair ask 😳.)

Chat: the right side of my neck hurted the most (average sauce fan iq, im afraid )

Chat: SAUCE BABY START TWERKING

( now im just finding funny chat stuff cus all sauce doing rn is trying to not cry by randomly singing along to the music and kyle is working)

Chat trying to plot lies on kyle by spamming kyle messed up smthin so sauce can get worried lmao

9:40: around there, maybe a bit later, sauce starts groaning and cursing more

Chat: Sauce is it hard

Sauce asks how many people watching bcs u know he looooves an audience. Kyle doesn't know how to check so he has to stop and ask the chat

Kyle: Seven- ..... 776? 800? a thousand? man idk :(. yall play too much >:( yall play too damn much 🙄! ... i fuck with yall tho >:)

Chat trying to gaslight sauce into thinking Kyle's actually tatting a dick on his neck

I've been skipping or doing other stuff during some of the tatting. Sauce got up to try and figure out some twitch function? Mic suppression? idk. He lowkey stalling lol.

Kyle starts asking what the chat been saying around 31:40, curious.

Sauce and Kyle mumble to songs internmentedly lol

33:25 around there kyle raps to a song he rlly likes. Sauce adlibs it's cute

PAUSING THIS AT 35:10. We basically got an hour left in this jawn. YALL WE WATCHED ALOT IM PROUD!!!! OK im leaving this here for now, reblogging l a ter maybe even finishing it idk? I just need this shit sent cus im a lil nervous if it'll even load... this was a lotta work 😭 all for tatman and sauce interactions damn... ion even know this man's last name .. i need to go do strong people things now BYE see yall soon hopefully

[redrobin-detective]

One thing that infuriates me about modern life is, for how terminally online everyone is, people are terrible at answering messages. I communicate primarily through texts, show love through ‘thinking of you’ messages, ask important time sensitive questions over the phone. I don’t need answers back right away but when days past without response it passes rude into disheartening. Nothing infuriates me more than following up in person on a text I sent a week before and getting ‘oh lol sorry forgot’

[justasopearchive]

uhmmmm.... 👉👈 im still curious about your thoughts on why you think sope has kind of drifted apart these past few years. ive been watching the two closely since 2017 and kind of went mia last 2020. only got back in the fandom late last yr so im curious about your perspective on why you think so... ive seen some sopies share the same sentiments and i wanted to get more context as to why yall arrived with almost the same idea. i already asked you this before but i noticed you still havent answered it yet. if you wont reply to this, i guess ill just take that as a hint to never ask about this topic again hehe sorry if these ever came off as delusional or anything but im honestly just curious about what happened 🥺

Oh, of course; sorry about that, my entire Tumblr is on a queue, so I’m rarely actually ON Tumblr (except yesterday) and most asks I get are lowkey toxic shipping stuff, so I ignore it 😩

It’s not delusional at all; and if it is, I’m also delulu lol. In terms of Sope in particular, I always got the feeling that Suga had a thing for Hobi…a demonstrable thing, crush, feelings, confusion, call it whatever you want. Yes, BH feeds into the madness, but I don’t think they can fake every second on camera and he (Y) was just demonstrably happier, softer and overall more energetic with him (H).

But we stopped getting damn near any interactions a few years ago. Like. At all. Even the 2021 and 2022 memories were bare bones for us Sopies.

My theory? Sometime in 2019ish something happened and one or the other said something pretty bad to the other or feelings came to a head and someone, IDK WHO, put them on ice (I tend to think it was Hobi who wanted to chill out…idk, he just never seemed as into it). And they just haven’t been the same since then. We know they used to see each other outside of work in the past because both of them have said it and there’s photo/video evidence. Now, J-Hope says he sees Suga “in the office”; a far cry from two dudes who went to concerts together or sat around and drank at their new office.

Even Yoongi being the only one not at the JITB release party. That wasn’t sus to y’all? And, yes, I know they said he “felt sick.” But come on…he turned around and performed, in outstanding health, at the Psy concert right after that. That just looked…strange.

Anyway, I’m choosing to remain delulu and force myself to believe that they love each other and Sope is not divorced and they’ve kissed (don’t worry, I know this is all jokes and fantasy…I actually believe 5/7 of Bangtan are in or have recently been in, hetero romantic relationships).

I’ve literally never “shipped” anyone else in my life and BTS is the only group of strangers I actively enjoy keeping up with (I don’t even watch reality TV 🥴)—so I’m just gonna hold on to this as my OTP for awhile lol

This is all just conjecture and gossiping on MY part.

Hope that answers your question 🙃

[beomglocks]

three’s a crowd ; h.k & k.th

summary : just you and your two boyfriends

pairing : bf!taehyun x bf!hyuka x reader

warnings & other : requested, fluff, idk much abt poly relationships other than there’s more than two people, sorry if this is bad LMAO, tyunning best boyfies, sleepy kai

you groan, rolling over only to find that you couldn't actually do that. had it always been like this? maybe not, you think to yourself. you groan once again and try to force your body to roll onto the right side of your bed but a firm hand kept you in place. already this early in the morning you couldn't have what you want.

"you're gonna wake him up," someone whispers softly. you peel open your eyes which are heavy with sleep and are lowkey protesting for you not to do that. you wonder for a moment if rolling over was worth slightly waking up for, however whoever was awake knew you were awake too now. maybe next time, you suppose. it would've been nice to sleep comfortably last night but it felt like you hadn't slept in ages and you can only guess why that is. the bed was cramped, and hot, and goddamn, someone had turned off the aircon in the middle of the night!

when you look up, one out of two of your boyfriends, taehyun, is already sitting up against the headboard, completely awake. his head is perched up against the headboard and in his hands is his phone. "were you awake this whole time?" you ask him. your voice is raspy and sounds gross as you prefer to not speak as soon as you wake up but you're curious. though it's true that he was the early bird among you three it was still fairly early for him to be awake.

"i woke up an hour ago plus the bed is too stuffy," he says looking down at you staring up at him. so he had felt it as well, nice to know you weren't the only one who slept uncomfortably. "well.." you let your words drift off into the air as you turn to the other boy who is completely unconscious on the bed. his mouth is slightly open and you swear you can see drool threatening to slip out of his mouth. his curly hair is messily strewn all over the place and in his clutches is a plushie you or taehyun had once gifted him for a birthday, you don't remember.

what a sight, you think to yourself. huening kai, ever the dreamy sleeper. he looks peaceful despite the contrast of how absolutely petrified he was at the sight of the haunted doll, annabelle, in the movie you all watched last night.

taehyun shakes his head with a smile on his face, "it's not like i suggested watching literally anything else." you make a movement that you think could pass off as a shrug but you don't think taehyun can tell. "he said he could handle it and you know i can't say no to our baby."

you move around on the bed for a moment to find a comfortable position to speak to him in without disturbing kai. "plus we all got to cuddle for once, even though it was hot as hell last night," you mumble.

"sacrifices were made," taehyun mumbles. he sets his phone down on the bed beside you and rubs your head in what you think is an affectionate way but he's been working out and it hurts. "ouch," you grumble, deciding to stick by hueningkais still asleep frame.

the moment you cuddle up to kai who is facing away from you, he turns over so that you're both face to face. you don't think he realizes so you just kiss the tip of his nose lightly. "breakfast?" taehyun suddenly asks. you think to yourself for a moment. it sounds tempting to go help taehyun with whatever he plans on making for the three of you to consume however, the bed is just too comfortable. despite it being hot, kai's body heat is a type of hot that doesn't make you uncomfortable.

"can you go make it? i wanna be here when he wakes up so he doesn't think we abandoned him after the movie." kai can be a bit tender after scary movies. the whole reason why you and taehyun hadn't slept well was that, for no other underlying reason at all, kai suddenly wanted all three of you to cuddle on the bed.

it was a cute idea that you agreed to and although taehyun was reluctant, he too agreed to the proposal.

you move your boyfriends hair away from his peaceful looking face and you watch as his nose scrunches up but soon goes back to normal after a couple of seconds.

"we also need a bigger bed," you mumble randomly. you hear taehyun snort a laugh behind you, "when we first moved in, the first thing i pointed out was how tiny the bed was." he crosses his arms over his chest and decides to watch you play with kai's hair.

you turn over with a playful frown on your face, "im not the one who had a growth spurt! the bed was fine back then." you feel hueningkai stir beside you and suddenly his gravelly morning voice is rumbling through your ear.

"bunk beds?" he mumbles with his eyes still closed and a lopsided smile on his face. you tug on a piece on his hair when he situates his body to lounge over both yours and taehyun's like free real estate. "hell no," you both say in unison, protesting the idea.

"im going back to sleep," kai grumbles with a slight roll of his eyes. taehyun pats the other boys hair, soothing out the stray bed hairs that are sticking out. "what do you want to eat?" taehyun asks, getting up from the bed and stretching out his limbs. "make pancakes," you suggest. thankfully, hueningkai is fast asleep once again so he can't protest to the food choice.

taehyun nods, walking away to the kitchen. you decide to stay and run your hands lightly up and down your boyfriend's back. his slow breaths are lulling you back to sleep too but you fight to stay awake. if you fall back asleep you know you both won't wake up until late in the afternoon and that just won't do because kai has to finish the errands he didn't finish yesterday.

you get up from the bed, making sure not to wake kai up, which somehow you manage to do successfully. you make a mental note that he sleeps like a baby after scary movies.

you walk into the kitchen and see taehyun preparing the ingredients for pancakes. he lets you watch him for a while until you go up to him and insist on clinging to him, something he can't and won't protest against.

about 15 minutes into making pancakes, hueningkai straggles into the kitchen. you snort out a laugh at his appearance. his tall frame is leaning forward, the first indication that he's still half asleep. the second is his pouty lips and closed eyes. his hair is sticking up in all different directions as he messes with it because he sees you staring at it.

"you left me," he scolds. "you were sleeping," you defend quickly. "i got hungry," you smile.

"whatever, they smell good," he yawns. "wanna taste?" taehyun asks, holding up a piece of a previously cooked pancake. "yes, me first!" you detach yourself from his back and stand in front of him so he can feed you. hueningkai sleepily walks over for his bite of food to taste after you.

"they're good," you both say. "of course they are, i made them," taehyun says proudly. you fight the urge to flick his head, "i helped." you mumble. "i don't doubt it at all," hueningkai pipes up. "they have a bit of your flavor."

"what the hell does that even mean?" you give him a weird look, waiting for him to elaborate. out of the corner of hit eye you see taehyun smile lazily at overhearing the early morning conversation. "god wait, i didn't mean it like that! im still half asleep for fucks sake," he raised his hands up and waves them.  "im going back to sleep," he announces.

as he starts sauntering off back to the room you detach from taehyun who seems to be almost done. "im still kind of tired too... come join when you're done," you give him a chaste kiss as you walk away from him.

taehyun sighs to himself as he finishes up the rest of the food.

just another day.

[velveticamoon]

AOT : HOLIDAY HEADCANONS

these totally weren’t supposed to go up yesterday ahaha- 

P.S: this is my first writing post!! i thought it would be an easier transition by writing hc’s, and i got my friend saniya (@bokesaniyaboke) to help me out with writing them, so i hope y’all enjoy :) (enjoy our 2 am chaos-)

i have more writing planned for the future too, and decided that i’ll be writing for: 

- attack on titan

- bungou stray dogs 

- free!

- fugou keiji: balance unlimited. 

don’t be shy to send in your requests, i’m more than happy to do them ;) 

anyways, i hope you guys enjoy, let me know if you want more! and to those of you that celebrated, hope you had a merry Christmas :) 

LEVI

Decorating the house with him!! Except he’d be trying to get out of doing it at first lol

He’d be pissed about the mess that would come with decorating the house 

But if you keep pestering him enough he’ll eventually give in lol 

He’d be very meticulous about which decorations go where, but you’re just gonna have to put up with that 

Pls don’t complain too much, he really wouldn’t be doing it with anyone else 

(in the words of saniya: “ur the only exception be happy about that)

Idk why but i feel like he’d be really good at hanging up the lights?? With the placement and whatnot? 

He probably has a very keen aesthetic eye i feel like (saniya: “pinterest but as a person vibes”)  

At the end of it, while y’all are sitting on the couch drinking some tea, he quietly mumbles how he likes the work you two did 

But you felt like teasing him and he got all huffy and said it louder, obviously calling you a brat right after cuz why wouldn’t he 

EREN 

Ask him to make gingerbread houses!! pls he’d be so excited about it 

He’d even go to the store himself and get all the supplies on his way home and you both wouldn’t waste a minute to start a baby

Look he’d start getting competitive (pls we all know how he is) and would turn it into a competition so be prepared for that lol 

But when his gingerbread house falls over he starts getting angry

Proceeds to drive to the company’s factory to break it down in his titan form (there’s no stopping him now) 

Gets Armin to join him and they smash the houses in their titan forms together LMFAOFNDND PLEASE IM WHEEZING- 

But for real, he’d probably get pouty, and turn into a whiny baby

Don’t call him out on it though he’ll just get even worse lol  

Shower him with kisses right after and he’ll be blushy but he’s fine dw about it 

He’ll get over himself eventually and then proceed to ask with a boyish grin on his face if you wanna give up and just eat the houses as they are 

Y’all end up with stomach aches but it’s fine he makes it a little more bearable :))

MIKASA 

Making ornaments (pls it’d be so cutenjdjn)

Saniya: “she would stab me with an ornament and i’d say thank you” 

Comfortable silence with a little chatter here and there

Every now and then she rests her head on your shoulder (softie) 

Just like Armin, getting super flustered and blushy when you compliment her 

She helps hang the ornaments onto the tree and the tree turns out to look so pretty

Would take your hand and sit the two of you on the couch and just admire the tree in silence 

It’s so comforting you slowly feel like you’re about to fall asleep 

Make her some hot chocolate pls all she really wants is to cherish this atmosphere the two of you have created, all huddled up on the couch together 

She’d totally fall asleep cause the girl’s always working in overdrive pls does she even sleep-

Make sure she’s warm alright?? If u don’t i’ll stab you ;)

JEAN 

Watches hallmark movies with you, only to make fun of them (romance at it’s finest amirite) 

Popcorn fights while watching them 

Will get mad when you see a horse and say “look it’s you horse face” 

He says the dumbest pick up lines during the movie as an attempt to impress you 

“hey y/n, can i have your picture so i can show santa what i want for christmas?” 

“jean, we’re literally dating-” 

Something romantic will happen in the movie and Jean will continuously ask you to recreate that scene. “y/n can we-“ “if your about to ask me if you can spin me whilst ice skating, then no” “aw :(“ 

Oh to be spun by jean while ice skating- but that’s not the point 

Wrap him up in a blanket while watching the movies, he’ll melt 

Call him out on it and he’ll turn into ereh 2.0 (aka another whiny baby) 

Jkjk but he’ll definitely try to deny it cuz u know he’s a “biG oL maNLy maN” but he’s a softie ;)

ARMIN 

Making holiday cards with him 

When you bring up the idea his face lights up instantly it’s the cutest thing omg

I can see him bringing his own supplies to help with getting started

Envelopes, letter paper, markers. Hell, he’ll show up with glitter markers (those things are god-tier istg-)

he gets super flustered and red when you compliment his card

SUCH A CREATIVE BOI

If you mess up on your card he’s totally gonna be there to cheer you up!!

“Hey don’t worry, you can just start on a new one :D”

He probably won’t ask but he lowkey wants the card you messed up on cuz he thinks it’s cute

Makes cards for everyone and then takes you with him to deliver them

Would be really shy at the post office cuz he’s never done this before 

*cue you falling even more head over heels for him because he’s just so?? endearing?? it’s insane??*

Eventually, he gets the hang of it and ends up having a really fun time :D

Let him be the one to place the stamps on the envelopes, it’s ~therapeutic~ for him 

Overall, he’s probably the best person if you wanna use this as a healing opportunity tbh, the entire day is just filled with the calmest atmosphere one could wish for, and the smiles never leave your faces, even after you’ve finished

CONNIE 

Snowball fights w/ our resident baldy jKJKJK

Pls you wouldn’t even plan for it to happen 

It just kinda,, did,, 

Y’all we’re walking through the park, on your way back from lunch or something 

But you decided to make a pit-stop at the park cuz you saw an ice cream truck (do y’all know how rare those are in winter?? I’d be running to get to it pls i have no self-control) 

Anyways, other ppl had the same idea, so now y’all were standing in line waiting 

As he was looking around, his eyes landed on some other kids throwing snowballs at each other, and ideas started forming in his head uh oh-

And there just so happened to be a pile of snow right next to his feet- 

Y’all can probably guess what happened- 

“Hey y/n” “yeah-?” *throws it right at your face* 

And so the war begins 

Two words: S N O W  F O R T S. pls ppl would be concerned as they walked by and saw y’all just trying to fucking PUMMEL each other (sounds like fun tho i wanna do it now :( haven’t done it in years pls-) 

But you have to stop it before one of you gets hypothermia considering how long y’all have been going at it 

Anyways, he’ll buy you a hot chocolate to make up for making you frozen to the bone dw :)

SASHA 

Popcorn and cranberry garland 

Look away for one second and the popcorn is gone but you don’t really mind

Make sure to bring a second batch of the popcorn because the first one WILL be gone 

(maybe even a third stashed away-)

She’s really excited about it tho!! But didn’t expect it to take so long omg 

I imagine her to be really clumsy while making them, so pull a move straight out of a cheesy romance movie and help her out while holding her hands ;) 

She probably won’t notice what’s going on for a good minute tho 

Pls be patient she’s doing her best 😔🤚🏻

But once she does she has the cutest blush on her face pls (i just love her a lot can y’all tell-) 

She’ll eventually get the hang of it and you both make really pretty garlands!!

She suggests hanging it up in the bathroom as a snack pls-

HANJI 

Caroling with them omfg- 

It’s gonna be chaotic

The neighbors hate y’all but its fine 

Look man if ur like me and can’t handle people being loud all the time bring earplugs cuz it’s gonna get L O U D

But if you tell them that their screeching is giving you a headache they’ll absolutely tone it down!!

But don’t be surprised when they inevitably forget about that-

But if you're more energetic than I am then have at it ;) 

Pls me and my lazy ass could never handle that- 

Anyways when y’all reach the houses where they refuse to open the door?? Hanji’s breaking that shit down and hollering into their house at the top of their lungs

Ur literally gonna have to drag them away before someone calls the cops 

Moblit pls get over here and collect them I’m begging u dude-

Don’t be surprised if y’all spend the night in jail that’s just how it’s gonna be oops 

[bakusdumptruck]

Bakusquad Crack Post

Sup bitches 🤩how’s your day been? hope its been good! Anywayyy i was listening to a “Rolling joints with Sero Hanta” playlist and this popped up in my mind sooo here’s a little Bakusquad scenario ��

.

.

. 

Pairing: aged up Bakusquad x GN Y/n

Warnings: Use of marijuana, swearing, injuries

Summary: A smoke session with the babes turned into a chaotic mess 

Ights sluts lets get into it 😈

Sero Hanta is the stoner of the group. Period. 

He taught everyone how to roll up just incase he was too high to function and wanted to smoke more

One night he texted the gc asking if everyone wanted to have a smoke sesh before they had to study for exams 

You all agreed and went over to his dorm together

All except Bakugou.

He called all of you “idiots” and “dumbasses” for getting faded before studying, but all Sero had to say for him to come was

“Ight bakubro, if you can’t handle it you could’ve said that instead of making excuses 🤷🏻‍♂️”

Bakugou showed up within 5 minutes.

Once everyone was together, tape boy had everything set up

There were 4 joints lined up, hella snacks, drinks, video games, and movies

He even had the LED a n d Galaxy lights on

Lordy it was gonna be a long ass night

NOW ON TO THE FIRST ROTATION 🤩

You know how I said Sero is the stoner? yup uhuh he got the MF GAS.

The rotation was Bakugou, Kiri, You, Mina, Denki, then Sero

You all have a high tolerance so after you saw Bakugou coughing up a fucking lung, yall knew you were in trouble

Everyone coughed... except Sero. He just busted a lung laughing💀

So the joint is finished and you’re all feeling fuzzy

yes you’re high, BUT its not enough to get you guys staring at the wall thinking about space and aliens

Just high enough where time is slowed down and your body feels light

Denki randomly shouted to play video games and everyone agreed

Guess what you’re playing 👀

Ju-on. The fucking grudge game. 

Why did Denki choose this game? oh he just wanted to see if it’d be a scarier experience if you’re all faded

It was 😃

Kiri volunteered to play the first stage to show off his Manliness 😤

So there he goes walking into the abandoned building 

yall know how you can use another wii remote to trigger jumpscares? 

yeahhhh Kiri didn’t know about it... and Bakugou was in charge of that

Everyone was chillin, lowkey feeling at edge to prepare themselves for anything about to pop up

Here comes the scene where he opens the door and scary bitch is on the other side waiting to grab him 

K: “Uhhhh this doesn’t feel right... am I supposed to go this way?

B: “No shit dumbass, its telling you go that way isn’t it? What are you scared or something 😏 I thought you were too manly for this game”

K: “I-I’m not scared... just making s-sure.”

M: “Hehe you’re stuttering kiri”

K: “...I’m just cold”

Right before he grabbed the door handle (I kinda forgot how the game went oops 😅) bakubitch tiggered a jumpscare

K: “Okay here I g- what the fuck 😃”

It didn’t work.

K: “Oh that wasn’t too bad! The games gonna have to try harder if it wants to scare m- JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT THE HELL IS THAT”

Scary bitch popped up outta no where and grabbed him

S: “DUDE FUCKING RUN AWAY”

Y/N: “KIRI THE BITCH IS RIGHT THERE WHY AREN’T YOU DOING ANYTHING”

K: “FUCK- CAN’T YOU SEE IM TRYING”

B: “BITCH SHAKE THE CONTROLLER. YOU HAVE TO SHAKE THE CONTROLLER”

K: “AHSJHS WHY ISN’T SHE LETTING GO”

D: “I-IT”S TELLING YOU HOW TO SHAKE IT. GO LEFT, NO NOW RI-”

Kiri accidentally punched Denki in the face 🙃

All: “...whAT THE FUCK AHAHAHSHAH”

yeahhh so thats how the game ended 😭

Denki was laying on the floor staring at the ceiling wondering what the hell just happened and why everyone was laughing at him

D: *in his head* “I just got punched square in the face 😃 and they’re laughing at me 😃 This is fine. 😃”

K: “B-bro are you okay 😭 iM sorry AHAsh its- its just everyone was screaming and AhahhAHAHA IM SORRY 😭”

Sero let him start the second rotation as an apology for laughing instead of checking up on him 

Honestly yall don’t know if you can go on to the third

Everyone was hella faded at this point

Eyes red, dry mouths, and hungry stomachs

Mina ordered TacoBell knowing everyone was gonna want to eat more than the snacks and you all sat on the floor munching away

You all started talking about stupid stuff:

S: “So like... what happens when we get scared half to death twice”

M: “👁👄👁”

B: “👁👄👁”

D: “👁👄👁”

Y: “👁👄👁”

K: “👁👄👁”

D: “I’ve been scared half to death multiple times... im fucking immortal.”

After a few more high conversations Mina suggests to make tiktoks 

Have yall seen the tiktok where Mina and Y/n do the trend where they wink at the camera and all the boys are watching and Baku comes up to kiss Y/n? 

yup you do that BUT

When Bakugou grabbed your cheeks and went in for the kiss he missed and fell flat on his face 💀

*Cue everyone falling on their asses crying*

Best believe the tiktok went viral 🤩

After the third joint yall decided that the room was too suffocating and went out for a walk 

It didn’t seem like a bad idea... until you all got outside

Denki and Sero were singing “Milkshake” at the top of their lungs while wall twerking on the trees

Kiri and Bakugo were racing to see who’s the fastest but kept tripping over their own feet

You and Mina were recording everything those dumbasses were doing.

All of a sudden yall found yourselves in a clear area a bit far from the dorms

Bakugou laid in the grass staring up at the stars and you all joined getting into a little cuddle pile

At this point the effects of the joints hit at once and everyone was out of their heads

They felt like their spirits were floating out of their bodies

*BOOM*

M: “...did you guys hear that”

All: “yes”

M: “should we go check it out?”

B: “Hell yeah. What if it’s a villain? I bet I can beat their ass in less than a second”

Y: “First, thats literally impossible. Second, We can barely fucking move. How do you expect us to fight a villain 🙂”

A Nomu popped up in front of you

D: “Uhhh aye Bakubro... you think you can beat his ass in less than a second?”

B: “FUCK YEAH WATCH THIS YOU FUCKING EXTRAS.”

...

HE FUCKING MISSED Nomu: “ERRHSJAKFjhuSGHD”

Y/n: *shoots up on their feet then falls over immediately* “DAMNIT I CAN’T STAND UP STRAIGHT WHAT DO WE DO”

Everyone started to use their quirks

Sero shot tape to the nomu

Denki sent 1 millions volts

Mina just kept shooting acid out

Kiri hardened up and threw punches like his life depend on it

Bakugou was screaming “die” and kept exploding shit

and You were also using your quirk to the best of your ability

K: *heavy breathing* “guys... i think we got it”

B: “Ofc we did... we literally went bat shit crazy on it”

When the smoke cleared it was still standing in front of you guys... unharmed...

AND IT MULTIPLIED

K: “😶RUN AWAY”

you all started running back to the dorms

well, tried running back to the dorms

Everyone was bumping into each other and tripping

S: “WE’RE GONNA DIE”

Y/n: “WE’RE NOT GONNA DIE JUST KEEP RUNNING... FUCK THEY’RE GETTING CLOSER

Denki ended up facetiming Aizawa in hopes that he would help

A: “Denki, its 4am what do you w-”

D: “SENSEIIII NOMUS ARE CHASING US. SEND HELP.

A: “Why are you guys out of the dorms? aND WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME USE YOUR QUIRKS. YOU HAVE YOUR HEROS LICENSE FOR A REASoN”

D: “WE TRIED. WE MISSED AND IT MULTIPLIED. WE’RE ALSO HIGH AS FUCK BUT WE’RE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT THAT”

A: “... did you say you were high?”

D: “IRRELEVANT. SENSEI WE’RE GONNA DI-”

The nomu caught him.

A: “Denki... Kaminari... hello?... *sigh* you guys are gonna be the death of me.”

You all ended up getting knocked out by the nomus and taken to the League of Villains hideout 

B: “...Never thought i’d be here again”

S: “ I still have the last joint in my pocket... ya’ll wanna smoke?”

Dabi and Shiggy stared at him like he was crazy but agreed anyway 🤪who’s gonna pass up a free joint? not them. 

So everyone got high again and chilled until the Pro Hero’s saved your asses :)

Oh and also don’t think Aizawa let you guys off the hook. 

You all got house arrest and extra BRUTAL lessons for the next 2 months 

The End :)

Yeahhh idk what this was but I hope you all enjoyed it!! I really wanted to write something angsty but as I was writing I couldn’t take myself seriously and ended up making jokes 😭

[bokutomii]

movie theatre - chapter 11

warning: mentions of nsfw kinda??

“suna..?”

“yes shizuku?” suna sat up in his sit straight.

“where did y/n go? osamu isn’t here either.” shizuku questioned, not caring about the movie anymore.

“oh! osamu went to the bathroom” atsumu added. getting shushed by the people next to him when he said “oh!”

“maybe yn went to go get more popcor-“

new message from yn!! <3

i went to the bathroom,,the popcorn made my stomach hurt 😁 i’ll be back soon !!

“she went to the bathroom.” shizuku noted and turned off her phone.

“no way osamu AND yn went to the bathroom at the same time” atsumu said while taking a bite out of his own popcorn

“they are most probably making out right now as we talk or doing something beyond that” atsumu assumed. suna laughed at what he said but shizuku didn’t find it funny at all.

“okay”

“but no way they are. yn just texted me earlier about being mad at osamu” she said under her breath. getting comfortable in her chair next to suna again.

“did you say something shizuku?”

“no”

“there’s really nothing wrong about that though right?” suna went on. trying his hardest to get shizuku to pay attention to him.

“i guess”

“HAHSHAH” osamu laughed super loud. i swear the people inside the corner store could hear him.

“ouch..” i had tripped going down the stairs. when trying to walk down, i missed a step and had my phone in my hand so i wasn’t holding onto the rail. when i opened my eyes i saw osamu’s chest infront of me.

i had fell right into osamu and he was holding onto me so i couldn’t fall. his hands on my lower back, gripping onto the sides of my (favorite color) jacket. this is the closest i’ve ever been to osamu and it lowkey felt comfortable like this.

“shit yn, your ankle” osamu said while loosening his grip under my waist and holding me up correctly so he could go down to my ankle.

“wait! osamu watch your step-“

he tripped on a big crack in the sidewalk, falling on the ground and bringing me down with him.

this would be so awkward if anybody was watching us right now, we look fucking stupid.

we both laughed but not that loud this time.

“we look fucking dumb right now samu” i laughed out with him. i could tell he was watching me while laughing but i didn’t wanna say anything.

“yn”

“yeah samu?” he gently cupped my face in his right hand. and brought me closer to him. looking at me for a moment before tilting my face that’s cupped into his hand up to place his lips on mine.

it was shorter than i expected it to be. i wanted it to last longer, i want to stay like this for a couple more seconds but he pulled back. and i touched my lips although he stood up quick and held his hand out to help me up from the cold concrete.

“holy shit yn...im sorry if that was unexpected, how’s your ankle? did it get any worse?”

“osamu shut up”

“what?” he jointed his head in my direction.

i brought his face closer to mine, kissing him once more. i didn’t want this feeling to leave, it’s finally back after so long and im not letting it slip away. he placed his hand on the side of my face and started to slide his other down my back, a little bit too far down but i caught him and rested his hand on my waist. i don’t want it to go that fast now, especially not outside of a corner store.

i broke the kiss and followed with

“do you still think i like atsumu?”

“no, not a chance” osamu smiled and brought me into a kiss again.

his phone vibrated inside his pants pocket. he pulled away again. taking his phone out of his pocket and turning it on.

“hold on yn, im so sorry” he pleaded. kissing the side of my mouth softly and then turning around to answer whatever he got.

“its okay” i stepped back and wiped my mouth with the back off my hand. after that i looked back up to osamu

“who is it?” i asked, peeking behind his back. he turned back around, facing me.

“it was atsumu” he chuckled

“what did he say?”

“he says the movie is about to end soon, we should hurry back” he smiled and grabbed my hand gently.

“okay! let’s go then” i smiled back while nodding.

“im right behind you.” i added

“no, you’re walking next to me” he walked slower to get to where i was at. walking with me.

“yn”

“yeees?” i turned my head to him, and he already had my hand that he was holding next to his mouth.

planting two small kisses on the back of my hand. smiling while my hand covered his mouth.

“let’s hurry”

masterlist > previous > next

a/n: they kissed!!!!! i lowkey thought i was going to fast when writing this idk why.

! taglist ; open (dont be afraid to ask me!! my inbox is always open!!)

@rintarawr @bakugouswh0r3 @calumsfringe @just-snog-already @kiyoomichan @just-that-bi-girl @devilkittymusic @keiarma @kac-chowsballs

[seokjinsonlyone]

OK i’m adding on to your discussion post queen! Im OT7 and I am DEF a hoe when regarding BTS so i had to think a LOT about this. I feel like I would have a love SQUARE with Hobi, Jimin & Jungkook!

1. Seokjin & I would have too much of sibling type of banter and even though he’s fine and I’d hit ;) in real time it wouldn’t go past platonic relations (which i’m fine with)

2. Yoongi (MY BABY) in all honestly he’s my best friend’s bias soo maybe thats why I can’t see it any other way than platonic lmfaooo but in all seriousness I think we’d be great friends

3. Namjoon 😫 this ones hard to admit but I’D CRUSH SO HARD ON HIM but ion think he’s see me anymore than platonic like he’d friendzone my ass so hard

4. Taehyung and I would have a yoongi and seokjin dynamic mixed! Like again i’m OT7 and if any of em were down its a wrap 😚 but i feel me and tae would be the best of friends

NOW MY DELUSIONS START HERE: Hobi and I would have tension LIKE DEADASS WE PROBABLY THE MOST COMPATIBLE (based on zodiac & MBTI yes i looked don’t judge 😜). Like we’d make a great couple but JIMIN AND I WOULD BE FLIRTY AF LIKE HIM AND I WOULD DEF HAVE MORE NON PLATONIC VIBE GOIN ON! And when it comes to me and Jk I feel like our personalities definitely match and we would compliment each other a lot!!! Like we’d definitely fall for each other (in my delusions he falls first 👏🏽) . But yeah this my response in all honestly i just started ranting out loud so idk if i even responded correctly but babes i need you to do your own list like how i did with each member and if the vibes would be platonic or romantic 🙏🏽 anyways imm done LMFAOO

i LOVED this like YES girl dive head first into the crazy love knowing i’m not alone bc i DEFINITELY be checking our MBTI compatibility nd things of that nature watching content for research thinking daydreaming writing like wheeewww so if u want me to get more into it SAY LESSSSS

also let’s go into this knowing that any member could get it any day i always say beggars can’t be choosers and i’m literally on my knees saying pick me 🧎‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙋‍♀️ for these men so that’s that

namjoon: LOWKEY YOU GAVE ME ANXIETY BC I AINT EVEN THINK ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF GETTING FRIENDZONED BY HIM LIKE HES SO SWEET AND KIND AND OBLIVIOUS YOU’LL LITERALLY BE IN LOVE WITH HIM AND THEN HE’LL TELL SOMEONE YOU LIKE HIS SISTER LIKE THAT IS HUMILIATING but! in my experience i get along quite well with ENFPs so i have hope like i FOR SURE would be romantic with him but now i’m second guessing if he would like me back 💀

seokjin: 😭😭😭😭😭 i’m literally in love with him but we would be platonic bc we the same person like we both can’t be chaotic unserious emotionally stunted homebodies like it just wouldn’t work in all actuality

yoongi: idk WHY it’s different with yoongi bc it’s almost the same position as seokjin but it’s like the slightly different approach to life he has makes me think there would be romantic vibes with him like that whole “i believe in the power of negative emotions” thing he got going on kinda sexy idk if either of us would ever GO for it but we’d be on the same page at one point at least

hobi: <33333 romantic 100% genuinely feel like i would end up with him like i’m black and he rocking wit us so i’m rocking wit him he i could bring him to the cookout nd wouldn’t have to tell him a thing he’d just fit in so well and then like he’s just got this hint of sadness in him you can see nd i’m not even an emotional person but i would take such good care of him and he’d do the same like we would have such a deep connection

jimin: now this is almost the same situation as hobi and according to MBTI he’s like my most ideal match and i see it sooo much like he’s evil and a little mean but also so sweet and kind and he’s been wrecking me so bad lately but i think the problem is we both dom leaning 💀 like someone got to give up control nd idk who would so maybe platonic but like there’d be mad tension there

tae: platonic 😔✊ but only bc he seem needy and i don’t know if i could take care of him like he deserve we’d be great friends tho bc he’s weird nd i’m weird and we could listen to music together yes

jk: he is so hot there’s no way i wouldn’t have a crush on him and tbh i’m mad cool so i think there’s a possibility that he Could get one on me but i know it wouldn’t be on his mind 😭 heavy on the friends tho like my brother in adhd we’d act up whenever we got together group chat would be craaaazy

i took so long to answer this bc my brain was just going and going and i didn’t even say all i wanted to say bc i need more time to think but this my answer for now it is so long i’m sorry but you asked for it 😭💀

[projectjasper]

ok hi its lost anon!! i literally moved to my laptop to type this out because 1) i have a lot to say and 2) last time i had to look at other things while typing out an ask, it got deleted jfsidjfijdsio

SO first order of business, i have a theory about inkpaa. I think theyre building up inkpaa, but theyre going to end without them being canon. For me, inkpaa falls into two categories for me: too good to be true and horrifically under promoted. I think if they were going to have a wlw side couple, it would be promoted as such. Im not sure how much demand there is for gl in thailand, but i would say theres a pretty high demand in oversees fans. The chance to market the show as such just would make more sense in an economic standpoint! (to be fair though, ive only seen one other gl couple in a bl, CrisAm in friendzone 2, so theres not a lot of precedent for this) Also though, I feel like hoping for a gl side couple after all the amazing representation of mlm couples, healthy relationships, and the amount of stereotypes broken down in this show is just too naive. Its kind of the same reasoning of why im not as upset about the whole wai situation as i would normally be! Yeah, they seriously kinda dropped the ball on the wai situation, but they also did SO well with things like heteronormative stereotypes and with communication, so im willing to let it go without as much complaint, if that makes sense? So i can see theyre going for Something with inkpaa, but im almost entirely expecting them to end up unresolved and im kinda okay with that! Im curious what everyone else thinks though because i can be a bit pessimistic at times lol

okok second order of business: I would like to just agree with unreliable anon and say Yeah if theres ever a groupchat made i will give zero shits about anonymity! Its funny because im stuck between having fun with anonymity and also saying this one thing that would give me away immediately isjfiefhosihgego its just this weird fact that somewhat (SOMEWHAT) links me to one of the actors we all like, so i might say it sometime if i get to ansty about it!! i told my roommate about it but theyll only understand so much since they arent into any of the shows im watching lol so im lowkey dying to tell someone about it.. we shall see

and lastly (i think), third order of business: roundtable shenanigans :D

in response to the anons talking about the twitter drama: its so stupid and literally no ones business and thats all ill say. people need to worry about their own lives <3

to operanon: thank you for the warm welcome!! <3 im quite curious to see if you are the oldest!! im at least older than archer but i wont say by how much ;D

to reliable anon: i am indeed no longer lost :D i have found my place at the roundtable as it would seem

this roundtable is so fun and its so cool to be a part of it!! thank u to archer and the other anons for making this so cool and welcoming and awesome!!!

-lost anon

ps. im so curious who heart anon's mastress is

pps. i had two other tumblr tabs open in an attempt to make sure i remembered everything i wanted to type and respond to so i hope i didnt forget someone sdifjsidhgsiogdhoi

ppps. My nightly routine has become reading all the new fics in the bad buddy tag on ao3, so if anyones interested, i could give recs everyday or week? (idk which would work best for me or for archer but if theres interest i think it would be fun :D)

hello, dearest lost anon!!

so as for your first point - boy oh boy... so, i guess i'm gonna have to address the elephant in the room in terms of the promotion: as bad buddy is what you would call a "bl", all marketing for it is targeted at straight girls. this is why the bl label is a bit controversial among those of us who are queer and who watch these series - because the main thing that distinguishes bl content from queer content is that the former sees its target audience in straight girls and the latter in queer people. this is also why there was no serious promotion for inkpa - because the target audience of bls is typically not interested in wlw. however, with how the promotion was done for the series - i think it still heavily hints at inkpa being a very prominent secondary couple, as milk and love were promoting bad buddy quite a bit along with ohm and nanon. (which is not even a particularly common occurrence for secondary couples in general). and putting the marketing aspect of it all aside, i have pointed out multiple times that - from my extensive previous experience with bls - inkpa seems like an incredibly formulaic secondary couple, and i think they are doing a very simple, straight-to-the-point storyline for them, where they do eventually end up together. just my take on it, but this is what i genuinely believe.

as for your second point, i am REALLY curious what is so obvious and what links you to one of the actors 👀

re: p.s. - i have some ideas, but i am staying respectfully silent on the matter.

re: p.p.p.s. - if you want to send some fic recs our way, i think a lot of people would appreciate it! as often as you wish <3