#but like the opposite is Terrifying

[malkaleh]

One of the things I’ve been working through trauma wise is, okay this is weird why is ‘they are your mutual friend back/they like you as much as you like them’ scarier than ‘you are not owed friendship or a level of importance in anyone’s life/people have other priorities than you deal with it’ type things because I have No Idea. ????

[transmechanicus]

I know some people have unfathomable beef with the term but i really don’t see the issue with transmascs describing their specific experiences with societal mistreatment and persecution as “transandrophobia”, like i think it’s good to be able to discuss specific experiences and articulate the problems you’re facing actually.

[kat1nkulta]

I can’t stop thinking about Loop. Imagine doing everything, anything, to get out of a traumatic situation but the price is you. Your body is gone, your name is gone, your family doesn’t recognize you, you feel like most of your memories of them are gone too anyway. Suddenly you’re denied your identity. It’s like YOU never existed… and someone else took your place. You, whose biggest fears are forgetting and being forgotten in turn. You, who’s hesitant to change and now you’re forced to. You can’t even really blame anyone else because you did get your wish, right?

It’s explained clearly in the game, but the implications of it just hit me extra hard sometimes. Siffrin is as much of a study of Loop as Loop is of Siffrin. They share(d) their fears too so mal du pays words essentially becoming the truth to Loop is just… 🪨🪨🪨🙁🙁🙁💥💥💥💥

What do you do when all you have is ripped from you, all your worst fears come true, and youre forced to just… come to terms with it?

[ninyard]

Bipolar Jeremy at the height of a manic episode during his first banquet. Bipolar Jeremy spent insane amounts of money when he was manic once and that’s why he has to keep receipts for everything and doesn’t have much control over his finances. Jeremy attempted as a teenager and that’s why his mom won’t let him move out, because maybe she’s actually just too overbearing and worried about him, checking up on him all the time to make sure he’s okay.

[stinkythehutt]

also. something about palpatine being so adept at seeing into the future that all of his successes feel completely joyless by the time he achieves them because he’s just going through the motions… how fucked up and nihilistic and brutal that would make you…

[likesdoodling]

I know this might seem like a wild crossover, but so far as I'm concerned it makes perfect sense. >:D

[starry-bi-sky]

more about og tue timeline twins danny and dan/jamie

very touchy with each other. you might even say. ccclingy. its to be expected, they're two halves of a whole after all and all they've got of each other. worryingly co-dependent. do not separate. ever.

Danny was really weak and sick after the initial separation, and was for a while after. Jamie knew internally that if Danny died, he'd take the whole world with it. He was the one sole caretaker for him while he got better -- not for lack of trying on Vlad's part, but without his ghost powers he was nothing more than a feeble (albeit handsomely rich) man, and James looked ready to bite his head off if he got within ten feet of either of them.

Vlad is intimately aware that James (or Danny, if he tried) could snap his spine in half like a twig, and is uncomfortably aware of his own lack of ghost half now. It makes him feel self-conscious and exposed, so he never fully returns back to "cocky and self-assured billionaire Vlad Masters". Making deals with other brands feels a lot harder now that he can no longer possess them anymore.

Speaking of, he very quickly has to come up with a cover story as to why there's now a James Daniel Fenton to the public, when no records whatsoever of him existing existed prior. Lots of forging false government documents on his end. James and Danny do not help because it's his fault this happened in the first place.

(Regardless of whether or not Danny actually willingly chose to rip out his ghost half/humanity in canon is true, or if that was Vlad Masters speaking out of his ass, a large part of the blame still falls on Masters.)

(As his primary caretaker and guardian, it's his responsibility to ensure the health and safety of his charge, and since Danny was in clear emotional duress at the time, it can be argued that he was not in the mental state to make such a decision. And, allegedly, couldn't do it on his own which is why he asked Vlad for help.)

I chose "James" as Dan's name since it's a popular fanon middle name for Danny, and since he's half of Danny, it felt like it just made sense lol. Also because of the ensuing comedy of the two of them introducing themselves as "James Daniel Fenton" and "Daniel James Fenton". It's got the same energy as "danny with a y" and "danny with an i" and it's the exact kind of name bullshit you expect parents to give their twins.

I don't have their exact personalities down, but something I am actively writing into this au's bible is that I think Danny should be the quiet and (ig technically) meaner one. There's a lot to go into about interpretations for ghosts, halfas, and the incident itself, but TL:DW; Danny is technically soulless, or at the very least missing half of his soul (altho Jamie is too just in a different direction).

Pair that with the trauma of losing his family in front of him + having his ghost half ripped out + all the trauma he would've sustained as a hero, and he's not doing too hot mentally! i think if the twins met good timeline!Danny, Danny would've mistaken Danny for Dan and Jamie for the original half.

He comes off to others as pretty apathetic and indifferent to a borderline terrifyingly calm degree. He doesn't go out of his way to insult people, but he also doesn't care enough to consider the other party's feelings so he doesn't filter himself, which makes him come off as rude. The only times he looks truly comfortable is when he's near Jamie or talking to him.

His standoffish, ice prince demeanor makes Jamie look like a saint in comparison. When really he's not all that much better? He's more outwardly emotional than Danny, whether that be positive or negative, but at the end of the day he doesn't trust or care about anyone else any more than Danny does, and he's got a bit of a sadistic streak. Danny reigns him in when he starts becoming too destructive.

(Which I think makes sense. Danny asked Vlad to rip out his ghost half specifically so he could stop feeling his human emotions. Dan, despite his monotone voice, does exhibit emotions. He's smug when he asks Valerie if he likes his ghostly wail, sardonic when he reunites with Sam and Tucker, annoyed, shocked at Danny's ghostly wail, etc. He enjoys wreaking destruction and chaos.)

(If Danny had survived his encounter with Dan and if Vlad was successful, then I imagine he'd be rather apathetic to his other half as a whole. That'd be interesting.)

Overall though they're both hurt, bitter, and distrustful of the world around them, with abandonment issues a mile wide. They can get better and they can heal, but it takes time and patience and proper support.

On the DPxDC side of things, they do genuinely hold some kind of respect or regard for Bruce. They also don't become vigilantes for a while. Neither of them are jumping at the bit to enter heroism again, not when it was heroism that killed their family in the first place.

In fact when they find out Bruce = Batman they think he's foolish for it. They think its a fool's errand, and they've been so spurned by their time as Phantom that for a few weeks, Jamie even refused to call Bruce anything but Sisyphus. Danny called him Tantalus, and the two of them had a faux-argument about which one was more accurate.

Bruce does, though, worm his way into both of their hearts, and that's like, the main reason they become vigilantes to join him. So that they could keep him safe and not because of any desire to return to the heroic life. Relearning to care and finding satisfaction in helping others was an unintentional side effect.

(Bruce is so very smug)

Essentially:

The Twins: this is our squishy and fragile adoptive father. If anything happened to him, we're becoming mass extinction events.

Bruce: Nnno.

[budd-ie]

I think it would be really funny if fashion trends in ghost city mirrored the style of their beloved shapeshifter chengzhu’s most recent appearance. Whatever he wears? That’s what’s IN right now. It would also be funny if they always got it like. Slightly wrong. Chengzhu is wearing a long coat today! Long clothing MUST be the most fashionable. If your coat isn’t down the whole block, it isn’t in! The longer the better! Chungzhu is wearing hoop earrings today? Of course big rings are all the rage these days. Put them on your ears, your nose, your fingers, hell put them on your whole body! On your house! On your dog! The bigger the better! Look, he even gave a ring to grandunc—I mean his wife!!! If you don’t have one, you’re gonna look SO last week. Chungzhu’s wearing black today? Of course that’s the best color. Didn’t you know? If you aren’t wearing black, you’ll probably explode by at least tomorrow I think. That’s what I heard, anyway. Is it what? True? Hey don’t shoot the messenger, that’s just how it is. “I thought he was last seen wearing white and a ponytail” where did you hear that? And they heard it was blue? Black was last week? That can’t be right! Whatever….both is fine. I’m not taking any chances and you shouldn’t either.

[therantingsage]

New thought. For the fic/au idea. The party isn't...there, in their bodies, obviously. That part I established. But despite the light being missing from their eyes, as far as Siffrin can tell, they're behaving entirely normally.

This, of course, freaks out everyone involved. Mirabelle hates looking at herself from an outside perspective. Every time Bonnie sees their body they just shout "THAT'S NOT ME, TELL THEM TO STOP BEING ME THEY'RE NOT ME" because the intricacies of the situation are a bit beyond them. Etc etc no one is happy about this.

But they seem to be behaving entirely normally. To the rest of Dormont, but to Siffrin too, because Siffrin is intimately familiar with the script at this point. And they're following it perfectly.

One of the voices in their head, probably Odile, poses a question for one of the bodies. Siffrin sends it through, to the wooden actor, and-

Something shifts in the body's expression. Posture not what it was before. They're smiling. They're smiling wrong. Their eyes gain a shine they hadn't before. The eyes are wrong something is wrong why are they looking at him like that-

that's not your family

it's not

it's not

IT'S NOT-

And they loop back, heart racing, and return to the script. The actors act exactly as they're meant to.

........Siffrin hadn't gotten Memory of Change God before their family's minds all jumped ship. Siffrin has no idea what's going on. They've got no idea who's puppeting around the bodies. And without the context, they live in constant fear of whatever mask this is slipping and the stranger coming into the light. They can pretend everything's normal until they ask a question they wouldn't normally. And the actor's smile. Voices wrong, all the wrong cadence, they speak of change. The melting pot of ideas before them is unprecedented. Don't worry, Siffrin nomiddlenames nolastname! I can help with your script! It's the least I can do! I'll improv when they don't have lines to give! You're welcome! <(˘ ˘ ˘)>

[vaguely-concerned]

I'm guarding my heart against expecting adoribull crumbs in veilguard because I really don't believe it's going to happen. I think that might be one of the sweet slender branches on the possibility tree that they'll gently and quietly prune away from relevancy, especially since it doesn't involve a player character. dorian will almost certainly be back (hey hiii bestie how have you been? stressed out of your mind I imagine), but I can't imagine they'll let you get too granular with setting up your world state, especially since after ten years they will be expecting to have a lot of players who are new to the series. like AT MOST I can imagine a little background detail implying an amicable bittersweet breakup rather than dragging out the long distance and danger of it all as tevinter politics heat up, if you're allowed to set them both as being still alive.

all that being said I still want it so fucking badly tho fhdskjfhas

[lycankeyy]

Starting to think maybe I shoulddd. Have a mini break from socializing so much soon. Because my brain is doing the Scary Thing again

[chirpsythismorning]

I’m just gonna come out and say it… Byler’s best scene has gotta be the rain fight. It just is. It’s arguably Finn and Noah’s best performance for their characters’ dynamic. It has everything. Repression. Instant regret. Groveling. Heartbreak. Devastation.

Me, rewatching the rain fight to feel something that is akin to every single feeling one experiences after watching a masterful feature length romance, only in this case it’s all happening in one single scene:

[eddiewithcat]

NO ACTUALLY BECAUSE THE THING IS??

why did bobby bring up tommy at all during that locker room scene? why ask buck where he’s going?

that scene was there to show just how strong his and buck’s bond (cough father/son relationship) is, and to show how thankful buck is for him, so whyyy did they bring up tommy?

and then ….. instead of going to see tommy, like buck JUST told bobby he was doing, we see him show up at eddie’s door instead.

granted- it is a logical thing to do after having someone who looks exactly like your bff’s dead wife show up at your job and ask for said bff

…. but keep in mind… this is also television.

every line / scene is meant to be intentional.

[jawz]

why do people who transitioned as full-on adults continue to speak on what they believe the laws should be regarding child/adolescent medical transition? like how fucking dense do you have to be to think it’s the same situation? if you didn’t MEDICALLY transition in that specific age range, when your mind is more amenable to any number of ideas about identity or personal philosophy (as you are still a child figuring yourself out) then you do not know what it’s like to have doctors more or less gaslighting you into pseudoscientific concepts that adults can understand more like metaphors…

this is the same way religion harms vulnerable young people when their brain’s capacity for weighing what is and is not realistic is just not developed and the real life experience has not yet been gained… you don’t understand metaphors and gender roles and playing pretend and facades yet… it’s all REAL to you at that age… i was told i had a MALE SOUL… trapped inside my inferior female body which needed to be FIXED in some way.

the older i get the more i realize that what a lot of adult transitioners are describing amounts more to deliberate aesthetic changes, which do create a higher level of comfort in the body and self-expression, this is why there seems to be a lower rate of regret for these types… versus gnc children who have not yet gotten past the age stage of cross-sex identification (which seems to be a common experience during the development of sexual identity for a pretty sizable cohort of the current generation of homosexuals who transition)… i think adult transitioners without childhood dysphoria have a better big-picture view of the changes they’re seeking, and it’s extremely unfair for them to pretend that youth who are attempting to convert themselves from gay boys to straight women or from butch lesbians to straight men are in the same mindset. i know i was not. it was religious for me. it was totally all-consuming.

[queerplatonicdiaries]

you make the heavy easier to carry

[cowboyhatesithere]

never thought I’d be in a position of relating to former Drake or Kanye fans, but I do want to now take the time to clarify that Neil Gaiman being one of my most read authors for the last two years came from reading his work only prior to the news coming out about him now 🥴