#but like james has known about that since the very beginning

[inkdrinkerworld]

High Hopes 3

part one part two

cw: reader comes from a very tense and abusive home, verbal abuse, allusion to physical abuse, bad sibling relationships, fluff, angst, Remus is a sweetheart and the best almost bf ever

wc: 7.5k

Remus: On a scale of one to ten, how mad would you be if I said I found out your birthday passed and got you a gift?

You read the text as you’re exiting your class building and frown. Your birthday passed just after the new year, and you hadn’t told Remus because you hadn’t even been in the country. 

In lieu of an answer, you call him. Remus picks up on the second ring. 

“What did you get me?” He laughs down the line and you feel your stomach twist into knots. 

“Hello to you too, princess.” Since the Summer weekend sleepover thing (you’d still not decided what to call it), Remus had decided that was your new nickname and as much as you pretended to hate it, you loved it more than the others. 

“Hi Remus,” you breathe, eyes on the street as you cross and begin the walk back to your apartment. “What did you get me?” 

You can just tell he’s shaking his head. “It’s a present, why would I spoil that surprise?” 

“Because I’m impatient?” You rebut quickly. The walk back to your apartment is short, but the lingering winter makes it feel never ending. 

It also doesn’t help that you’d chosen style over cosiness- you’re in a long sleeved baby blue dress and a pair of boots that barely lick past your ankles. 

“I’m at your apartment, dove. I’ll give it to you when you get here.” 

Your eyes widen at the same time your heart constricts. “Remus, I’ve got like ten minutes left on my walk back!” 

As easily as he suggests anything to you, “Do you want me to come get you? It’s minus four right now.” 

“No, that wouldn’t make any sense,” you hear his car start. “Remus Lupin, I’m serious, I’m like one street away.” 

“So I’ll cut your walk short,” The engine roars across the line. “It’s cold, baby.” The fondness in his voice and his sparsely given ‘baby’ is what makes you stop. 

“Fine,” you try to sound much grumpier than you are and fail. “I’m at the coffee shop on the left.” 

Ten seconds later, Remus is there; his grey car collecting droplets of fine snow. 

“Hi,” you say as you slide in the passenger seat, your hands rubbing together making Remus frown. 

“And you wanted to finish the walk.” He flicks on the heating as he turns and goes back where he came. 

“How did you find out about my birthday?” You ask, fiddling with your bag to get out your water bottle. 

“Marlene mentioned that you wouldn’t be able to spend it with her this year and I asked when it was.” 

You hum, “It’s a little inconvenient having your birthday just after the new year,” Remus looks at you funny. “I like winter, don’t get me wrong, but a spring birthday would’ve been ideal. Like maybe in March.” 

He rolls his eyes, pulling into your parking lot. 

“How do you know when mine is?” He asks, helping you out of the car and then grabbing a bag out of the backseat. 

“Sirius and James talk a lot. Your gift is currently in transit.” 

Remus’ eyes shoot up, “When have you been hanging out with those two?” The ‘without me’ is implied and you look at him with a sly smile. 

“Jealous, Remus?” 

He tuts, figuring you out immediately. “You’re not winding me up, princess.” He holds the door open for you as you walk in and Remus sighs as he gets a whiff of your newest perfume. 

The couple of times he’s been to see you since the start of the semester, you’ve been wearing this intoxicatingly creamy vanilla perfume that has just a touch of something spicy to it that has been driving him mad. 

“Why would I be winding you up?” You toe off your boots and then look at him. “I’m gonna take the fastest shower known to man, but there’s food in the fridge and cookies in a Tupperware somewhere on the counter.” 

Remus shakes his head, setting his shoes beside yours. “I’ll wait for you, take your time.” 

You’re out of the bathroom in twenty minutes, in a matching jewel blue set of loungewear and a pair of socks. 

Your hair is tied back exposing a tiny tattoo behind your ear that Remus wants desperately to kiss. He’s on his laptop when you get out, typing away at what you assume is his book.

Remus doesn’t go here, he’s got a fancy writing degree already and he’s got an editing gig that he tries playing off as no big deal- but it is. 

He’s on ‘vacation’ though- meaning, he’s been on sick leave for the last four days so he can spend your first week back at school with you. Not that you know he’s been using his sick days for you. 

“Is roti okay? My mama dropped off some this morning.” Remus has yet to meet the old woman, but the fondness that overtakes your tone lets him know she’s at least half as lovely as you. 

“It’s perfect, dove. What do you want to look at?” He sets about finding your newest psychological thriller- Hannibal- and then makes his way into the kitchen to help you. 

“How was your day? I forgot to ask.” You mumble as you crack the ice into glasses before Remus pours some soda into them. 

“It was alright, got a couple more pages done of the book and then got high with Sirius.” 

You smile, a quiet smile that Remus thinks is going to stop his heart. “How was your classes?” 

You groan, “Long, boring and even longer.” He chuckles, leaving you to bring the glasses while he brings both plates to the living room. 

Remus sits in the corner of the sofa, he isn’t as slick as he thinks he is for sitting with a clearer view of the front door than you have. 

You appreciate the sentiment nonetheless. 

“Can I open the gift first?” Remus watches you with a rapt curiosity. He thinks you’re akin to a kid on Christmas- eyes bright, and hands shaking as you practically bounce in your seat. 

“Yeah baby,” he can’t help the sticky affection that slowly coats his words- an affection that only grows and spreads like warm honey. 

Remus watches you carefully tear the wrapping paper off the gift, his lips quirked just so as he watches your jaw drop. 

“You didn’t,” you murmur, shock and disbelief in your voice as you pull the wooden box out of the wrapping paper. 

“Open it,” the box in your lap is walnut colored, carved with spirals, flowers and dots and divots. The carvings are coloured in bright reds, oranges, yellows and some pinks. 

The lock resembles an ancient rusted clasp lock and as you unlatch it and reveal rows and stairs of chains. 

“Remus,” your voice is all clogged up and your bottom lip trembles and Remus wonders if he’s overdone it. 

“Yeah?” Your fingers trail along the crystal chips on the chains and you find your heart has cracked open. 

“This is the loveliest gift I’ve ever gotten,” the words are whispered into the air, your dinners cold as you take in every single chain in the box. “They’re for my glasses, yeah?”

“They are, pretty girl.” 

Silently, you close the box and put it to the side. “Thank you,” you blink and your tears tumble down your cheeks. His hands reach to wipe your cheeks gently. 

“You’re welcome.” You climb into his lap, Remus’ hands hold your hips. 

“You know you’re the first person since Marlene to get me something thoughtful?” 

Remus knows it’s meant to be a flippant comment, but his heart breaks for you. 

“Dove,” your heart clenches. “You’re breaking my heart.” His hands move up to cup your cheeks.

“I don’t mean to,” you say softly, shrugging one shoulder but Remus sees past the nonchalance you’re trying to exude. He doesn’t understand how someone as lovely as you has been treated so weirdly. 

He gives you an out though because he doesn’t want to push and push and push, “C’mon princess. Eat your dinner.” You take it and your plate as you press play. 

Remus notices you don’t move out of his lap but only smiles when you turn and start eating. 

“You’re staying the night?” You ask after you’ve both finished your dinner. 

Remus inhales, “What time is your first class tomorrow?” 

You pull away from him a little, “Eleven,” you have a hopeful look on your face that makes his answer easy. 

“Yeah I’ll stay the night.” 

You smile so big Remus thinks his heart stops. 

Then you get serious, “Wait, how do you feel about sharing the bed?” You ask the question softly, and Remus frowns. 

“I’ve shared the bed with you before, dove.” 

You shake your head, “I have a um,” you stumble for the words. Remus smiles. 

“A stuffy?” He asks quietly and you nod, nibbling away on your bottom lip. 

“Yeah a little yellow duckie,” Remus’ smile only widens. 

“That’s sweet, dove.” 

“You don’t think it’s silly?” He shakes his head. 

“How come I didn’t see it when we were at the other house?” He asks, his thumbs caressing your thighs. 

“I put him back in my suitcase, and I felt really bad about it too. I left it unzipped a little,” Remus kisses your temple as he chuckles. 

“You’re the sweetest fucking thing in the world.” 

Changing the conversation, “Do you want chai?” 

Remus’ eyebrows shoot up, “You have chai or do you need to make it?” 

You shake your head, a tired smile that’s a little teasing, “Jamie dropped it off for me when he came to see Lils.” 

Remus’ eyebrows shoot up even farther, “Jamie?” 

You giggle, “Yeah, s’what you guys call him.” 

Remus is a little indignant, “Jamie?” He repeats and you laugh even more. 

“Are you jealous, Remus?” 

Your hand reaches to the nape of his neck, twisting the sandy brown hair there as he deliberates. 

“Of James getting a nickname?” He asks and you nod, letting your fingers scratch his scalp a little. “No dove,” Remus fights the shiver that threatens to climb his back. “I’m not even a little jealous,” 

He leans into you, your noses bumping. “Why not?” Your breaths mingle as you lean even closer to Remus. 

“Because,” his hand cups your neck, his thumbs punching your chin upwards. Your chest heaves, “You’re already breathless and I haven’t even kissed you yet, princess.” 

“Please.” 

Remus smirks, wicked and impish. “No,” you whine and Remus almost rethinks his answer. “Go heat up your chai, pretty girl.” 

“You’re no fun,” you hop off his lap and head to the kitchen all the while Remus chuckles, his head against the back of the cushions as he watches you flit about the kitchen. 

-

The next time Remus sees you it’s after possibly one of the worst days of your life in a long time. Everything had gone wrong and there’d been a pit in your stomach all the way to your apartment. 

Just as you were about to walk in, your phone rang and without looking, you answered it. 

“Why does that boy keep going to your apartment?” 

You pull the phone from your ear and curse softly when you see, ‘Devil’s Right Hand,’ displayed on the screen. 

“What?” You really don’t have the energy today. 

Your father doesn’t seem to care though, “The boy. The one with the grey car.” 

As if you’re ten and not a grown ass woman, “Because we’re friends.” 

Simple, succinct and it would’ve been sufficient for any other regular parent. 

Your dad is anything but. 

“And he doesn’t leave till the morning? Do you think I’m an idiot?” 

The ‘yes’ in your brain wants so badly to slide off your tongue. You manage to bite it back. 

“I don’t understand the problem. I’m an adult, I can do as I please. You don’t even pay for the apartment, Mama does.” 

You hear the low simmering anger in your father’s tone. “Your grandmother gives you too much leeway.” 

You roll your eyes, “I’m not in the mood for a fight, was that all you wanted to know?” 

“Girl, watch your tone, it’s not a long drive to your place.” 

You shiver at the threat. “Can I go please? I have coursework to do and I’ve got exams to prep for later this week.” 

“Oh sure, coursework. Come home this weekend, your grandparents are at the house on Sunday.” 

Your body sags as you hang up the phone, the backs of your eyes burn with exhaustion. 

With a sigh, you unlock the door and get into your apartment. 

You don’t even bother to change or sit still, instead you just jump straight into your work; hours pass before your phone rings again. 

This time, it’s Remus.

“Hey,” he doesn’t like your tone, or the way you sigh the word. 

“Hi dove, I’m outside.” 

You’re relieved when you see him. He looks warm and cosy. His hair looks pillow soft and his sweater is a faded yellow one against the brown of his corduroy jeans. 

“I brought snacks,” he says, jingling a plastic bag in his hand.

You don’t smile quite as big as you normally would’ve and Remus frowns. “Long day?” He asks as he steps in, kissing your forehead when you nod. 

“Yeah, I’m just finishing up my coursework and we can have dinner.” 

Remus waits for you, busying himself with plating up dinner- leftover Chinese food from yesterday. 

“C’mon baby,” he murmurs, rubbing your back as he sets both plates on the coffee table and starts the tv. “Have some food and then get back to it if you like, but I need you to eat.” 

You look to argue, but he’s not commanding you. He’s not demanding anything from you, he’s nudging you to look after yourself. 

For a moment, you get stuck in just looking at him and your mind whirs. Remus is unlike anyone else in your life- he doesn’t take, he doesn’t shout and make threats, he doesn’t force you into a box or anything of the sort. 

Instead, he gives you room and watches you, watches you be yourself and encourages you to be yourself. It makes you emotional for a minute, the back of your throat burning as you come to the realisation. 

 “Coming,” you whisper, Remus’ eyes track your movements, and he smiles a little when you sit right up beside him, your forearms brushing. 

Dinner is quiet, little conversation here and there because Remus can tell you’re exhausted. 

In that sense, he washes up the dishes while you shower and he tidies up the living room before double checking your door is locked. 

He’s pouring hot water over the tea bags when you come out of your room, dressed in the softest look pyjamas he’s ever seen. 

“Oh you look cosy, princess.” You go bashful under the lovestruck tone to his words, walking into the arms he has open. 

One hand goes to the base of your neck, holding firm as his other hand squeezes around your back. 

“Tired?” He whispers into your hair and you hum. 

“I can have a cuppa though, not that tired.” 

You barely make it halfway through your cup before your eyes are closing and your head is lolling onto Remus’ shoulder. 

“Poor girl,” he murmurs, setting his cup down and sliding his hands under your thighs and around your back. “S’okay dove,” he coos as you stir, your nose brushed up to his neck as he walks to your bedroom. 

“Stay,” you mumble as he sets you down and Remus smiles. 

“M’right here dovey, not going a place.”

Remus wakes up to you moving around in bed, your legs kicking and your body thrashing. 

“Hey,” he croaks, voice cracking from sleep. “Dovey,” he mumbles, his hand rubbing your arm. “Baby wake up.” 

His nose brushes your cheek, hands shaking your shoulder a bit as your tossing worsens. 

“Wake up dove,” he whispers, stroking your neck. 

“Remus?” Your voice shakes, eyes open wide as you try to get your bearings.

“It’s me baby, I’m right here.” Your heart is racing as you sit up, Remus following suit. 

“Sorry,” you whimper, brushing your cheeks as you feel tears fall. Remus flicks on your lamp and his eyebrows thread together.

“Nothing to be sorry about,” He tucks you into his side. “Wanna talk to me about it?” 

His hand creeps under your shirt, his knuckles dragging up and down your spine. 

“Was just a dream,” you whisper, not quite sounding yourself. “A bad dream.” 

Remus nods, “Yeah, it was just a dream, pretty girl. Your pulse is pounding though, babe.” He can feel the harsh beat of it against the knuckles on your back. 

You shut your eyes, reliving the scenes in the dream vividly. 

“It’s a recurring thing,” you start, letting yourself be comforted by Remus’ hand on your back and the faint scent of his citrus soap. “I’m little again and my dad is blue mad, breaking glass and screaming in my face.” 

You take a shuddering breath and Remus tries his best not to react with his body. 

“I was about ten or eleven I think, by that time our relationship wasn’t salvageable. I can’t even remember what he was so upset about but I always seemed like the perfect target. ‘Specially when I started telling him off for being mean to my mum.” 

“Baby this was real?” You nod, Remus lets himself for a moment, imagine little you stopping grown adults from arguing and he feels his chest tighten at the thought. 

“He tried coming at me and mum with a piece of the glass. It was just a mess. The fight only stopped because our neighbours came to get me.” 

He feels your tears wet his shirt, but he doesn’t care. Not when you’ve started shaking again. 

“You’re alright baby,” his words sound like a promise whispered into your hairline. “You don’t have to go back to that, I swear you don’t.” 

“I think the reason I had a nightmare was because he called earlier. Said to come home on Sunday and that he knew you were staying over.” 

Remus can’t stop himself from stiffening then. He hates the frustration and defeat in your voice. 

“Do you want me to come with you on Sunday?” The offer is as easy as the breath he inhales. 

You look up at him, eyelashes wet and stuck together, lips and cheeks swollen from crying. 

“I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Remus smiles- a sad smile. 

“You didn’t ask,” he kisses your nose. “Think about it okay? I won’t be offended if you say no, pretty girl.” 

You nod and tuck yourself back into him. 

“Do you think you can go back to sleep or do you wanna watch something?” 

You think for a long time, “Will you hold me till I fall asleep?” 

God his heart really is breaking. Who could hurt you? 

“Till you wake up, dove.” 

Remus wakes up before you do, his arms still wrapped around you, and you’re more on his chest than on the bed. 

His mind wakes faster than his body, racing with thoughts of little you and the things you’ve lived. He finds that you hide it well. The hurt, the pain, the everything. One look at you wouldn’t reveal that, all anyone would see is a rich girl living with her parents and doing whatever she pleases; but under the surface? 

You’re so like everyone else, but so singular that it stops his breath a little. 

You don’t have class today, so he decides quite quickly that he’s letting you sleep in. The only thing you have to do is finish the last bit of your coursework and then Remus thinks a day doing your favourite things- shopping for books and having tea- is in order. 

He also wants to start breakfast, you’d mentioned a couple nights ago that you’d been craving blueberries and he’d had a hankering for pancakes. 

Remus tries moving out from under you but your fist closes around his shirt and he stays put. 

Breakfast can wait a bit. 

“Remmy?” You wake shortly after, the sunlight peeking through the curtains tickling your eyes. 

“Yes, dove?” His hand is stroking your arm, his blunt fingernails dragging slowly makes it hard for you to open your eyes. 

“Time is it?” You stretch as he reaches for his phone. 

“Just gone past ten,” you settle right back into his chest with a sigh. 

“Can you wake me up again at eleven?” You ask at the same time Remus asks, 

“Do you wanna go out for breakfast?” 

You hum, “What’re we having?” 

A yawn tears apart his answer, “Blueberry pancakes? Or bagels? Either or, I don’t mind.” 

“Are you making pancakes?” He can already tell where the question is headed. 

“Yes, do you have everything for them?” You nod then you shake your head. 

“Except the blueberries.” 

Remus pulls you and the covers a little closer. “Want me to go in to the grocery and get them?” You shake your head. 

“I’ll settle for whatever fruit I’ve got in the house.” Remus tuts. 

“Would you prefer blueberries?” He asks, his fingers dancing across the nape of your neck. 

“Yeah,” that’s all he needed to hear. 

“I’ll make you some tea and head out,” Remus isn’t allowed to slide out from under you, your thigh on his hip pins him down.

“You don’t have to,” you say bashfully, an intense guilt that’s completely unnecessary creeps into your voice and Remus has to slide his hands to your neck and push your chin up under your jaw. 

“You’re not inconveniencing me, pretty girl. I’m getting them, coming back here and making pancakes and then we’re going either to the beach or the bookstore.” 

You shake your head as best as you can with Remus holding your jaw. “You don’t have to do all of this just because I had a bad dream.” 

He tuts, “I want to take care of you. I’ll just be fifteen minutes.” 

You nod, accepting your defeat in the argument. 

In the time Remus is gone, you find yourself going through photo albums and reminiscing on the days when things were a lot easier. 

You stop on a picture of you and your grandmother and you sigh. Grabbing your phone, you dial her number. 

“Hello, Mama?” Your voice wavers as you speak. 

“Yes, Bebo?” You smile at the sound of her voice. Instantly, you feel like you’re being swaddled in her arms and like your troubles are eased. Your home name falling from her mouth with such familiarity also makes your chest ache. 

“I’m having trouble,” you say honestly. “I don’t know how to forgive anymore.” 

She sighs, you can hear shuffling in the back and things knocking about and then you hear your grandmother’s voice. “Bebo, you don’t have to forgive everybody.” She says, and you sniffle. “Not everyone needs that, or deserves that.” When you don’t answer she worries. You and your grandmother have an insanely close relationship, summers were spent in her back garden and on the beach near her house. She knows you as well as you can know any person. 

“Do you want me to come over? I can bring you lunch.” You take a minute to consider and know in your heart of hearts that she would be on her way if you said yes. 

“No,” you take the conversation to a different direction quickly. “Are you coming over on Sunday? Dad said.” 

You can hear the smile in her voice, “Yeah, I miss my grandkids, Bebo.” 

You’d seen her just three days ago but it feels like a month ago. “I miss you too, Mama. Would it be weird if I brought someone for dinner?” 

She gasps, always one for a good bit of gossip. “Like a boyfriend? Bebo, I’ve been waiting for this!” She sounds so excited that the image of her smiling wide behind her glasses warms your heart. 

“You don’t think dad will make it a thing?” 

She puffs out air, “Your dad would make the sun coming out a thing if he wanted to. I need you to not live your life according to him, Bebo. He’s my son, but he’s a little shit and he doesn’t rule you or anyone else.” 

You sigh, chest shaking under the weight of your withheld thoughts. 

“Is that why you don’t want me coming over? Your boyfriend is over?” You giggle, feeling weirdly like she’s right beside you as you tuck your phone between your cheek and shoulder. 

“He went to get blueberries because I wanted pancakes, and he’s not my boyfriend, Mama.” She scoffs, you smile. 

“But you like him and he’s nice?” 

“Super nice, like tooth rotting nice. And he’s really gentle and calm too.” 

You can see your grandmother’s smile, and find yourself doing the same. Even more so when you hear the knock on your door. 

“You deserve nice, gentle and calm, Bebo. I’m sorry I couldn’t have kept you kids for longer.” 

“Mama,” you gasp the words as you look through the peephole and find Remus standing there with the groceries. “You did and are doing enough. You’re not in charge of his actions, he is.” 

Remus’ eyes narrow as he sees your glassy eyes as he steps into the apartment. 

“I know Bebo, I know.” 

“I gotta go, but I’ll call you to let you know if I’m coming okay? If I am, would you bring,” she cuts you off. 

“Of course I’ll bring you coconut fudge Bebo, I’ll make it on Saturday so it doesn’t get stale.” 

Remus starts about the kitchen, but you can tell he’s intrigued about the conversation- or at the least, who you’re on the phone with. 

“Thanks Mama, I love you.” You see a little smile break out of his face even as he faces away from you to measure the flour. 

“I love you too Bebo, go enjoy your boyfriend.” You laugh scandalously and hear her chuckle before you hang up. 

“How’s your grandma?” Remus asks as you come into the kitchen and sit on the counter near him. 

“She’s good. I called her to talk about the nightmare but I kept getting too sad so we just talked about other stuff.” You swing your feet as you watch Remus mix the wet and dry ingredients. 

“Is she also going to dinner on Sunday?” He poses it conversationally, because it is but he also wants a feel for who’s there at these dinners. 

You nod, stealing a blueberry from the carton. “She’s always there. I think she comes because she knows if she’s there my dad will be in check for the whole night;” you smile when you eat the blueberry and find it’s sweet. “She’s pretty scary when she needs to be.” 

“I don’t doubt that, dove. You’re the same way, can tell there’s a little fire behind all that niceness.” 

You roll your eyes, “Whatever you say Lupin,” Remus sets your griddle on and oils it as it heats up. “Would you really want to come on Sunday?” 

He pours three pancakes on, “Unless I have to do something strange, then yes I want to come.” 

“If I told you that there was an initiation process that everyone’s super anal about, that would be a deal breaker?” Remus looks at you wide eyed and then notices your poorly hidden smile. 

“You’re a menace.” He says as he flips the pancakes, another raucous laugh bubbling out of you. 

“On occasion.” Remus stacks three for you and reaches for the syrup in the cupboard above your head. “But Mama, my granny, will probably badger you about your ‘intentions’ and whatever else.” 

You thank Remus for the pancakes with a kiss on his cheek. “Eat,” he says, cutting your pancakes for you, making you smile. “I can handle badgering. But I should warn you, I don’t hide anger well.” 

You wave off his concern. “Oh he won’t be out of line, Mama keeps him in check. And I just ignore him anyways.” Remus doesn’t like the way you shrug like your dad being a prick is no big deal, but he decides you’ve shared enough for the day. 

You don’t start eating till he makes his own stack and switches off the stove and that makes him smile a little. 

“Do you have a preference for the beach or the bookstore?” He asks in between bites of breakfast. 

You think for a moment, “Can we go to the bookstore? There’s a couple books I want to check on.” 

Remus nods, not really caring where you go, just that you do something you like. 

-

You decide against Remus joining you, not sure if you’re ready for him to see the circus that is your family. 

Your Mama is on the front porch, sipping what you know is coffee as you get out your car. 

You send Remus a text, Made it. I’ll let you know how it goes. 

His response is immediate, My offer to come get you is always on the table, princess

“Where’s your boyfriend?”She asks, standing to hug you.

“Told him that it might be too much, didn’t want to scare him off.” You try to sound as chipper as possible, but your grandmother knows you. 

“He’s not in control of you anymore, Bebo. You can’t give it to him.” 

You nod, diverting the conversation. “How’d the fudge turn out?” 

You have a couple bricks with her and your older brother in the garden out back before they’re ready to serve dinner. 

There’s a quiet stillness that covers the remaining winter, the coffee and coconut milk fudge just enough to make it seem like the tranquillity could last forever. 

“Mama said you have a boyfriend?” your older brother asks, protectiveness and amusement in his tone as you look up at him wide eyed and shocked. 

“I told her he’s not my boyfriend. Not yet.” 

“She really wants him to be. He made her pancakes and he spent the night.” You tut at your grandmother’s gossiping. 

Your brother smiles, “I’d like to meet him sometime, you look happy again.” You just nod, scared that you might say something that gives away how much you really really like Remus. 

“Dinner’s ready,” your mum comes out on the porch, giving all three of you a soft smile before going back in. 

Dinner is great until the round-the-table questions get to you. You’d avoided it for a couple courses, but it appears your luck is out. 

“How was your coursework?” Your dad says it like it was an actual lie, you don’t miss the vile amusement in his tone, like he’s waiting to catch you in a lie.

“Lots of reading, but I think I got above 85 which is great considering this professor is known for failing students for less than 75.” 

Your dad isn’t satisfied. “What was it about?” 

You stiffen in your chair, you don’t like the implication that you’re lying. “Capital punishment, recidivism and how the two coincide.” 

Your mum can tell your dad is still not pleased, so can your grandmother and she sets him right with a look. 

“Do you need her professors to start running their coursework topics through you? Are you going to call the school next because you disbelieve everything?” 

The table is tense as your grandmother and your dad have a stare off- not that she’s at all concerned about him. 

Your younger siblings feed off your dad’s energy, their own question hot and ready and aimed at anyone with answers.

 “How is it fair that she moved out?” And “Why does Mama pay for her apartment and not just tell her to move back home? It’s silly how much she’ll do for attention.” Or “Maybe if she just came home dad wouldn’t be so upset?” You can’t even get a word in, stunned silent as you realise this is how they see you.

It’s when your younger brother and sister say, “You always make it about you, you’re Mama’s favourite and that pisses us off. Dad doesn’t like you because you think you’re better than us, and it would all be better if you just made a clear decision- do you want to be in the family or not?”, that your breath quickens at their words, your heartbeat roaring in your ears. 

The part that hurts is that they’re too young to know all the things that have happened, they don’t get why it’s so hard for you to sit here even on bi-weekly Sunday dinners and play nice with your dad.

Your food suddenly loses taste when your dad sends an evil smile your way, your stomach rolling.

They don’t understand that you’ve taken their beatings, that you’ve suffered horrid treatment just so they wouldn’t have to.

“Either way, we don’t care. I think we’d be better off without you if I’m honest. All you do is mope and complain, you wouldn’t even have half the shit you do if it wasn’t for dad. He’s not the monster you make him out to be.” 

Your older brother cut them glares, “Enough! You don’t speak for this entire table, find somewhere else to be.” They scamper off, your brother doesn’t even give your dad the time of day, he looks at you immediately. 

“Go take a walk, Bebo.” He’s the only one of them that likes you, the only out of three siblings that actually knows you, that knows what this is doing to you and you’re grateful for it. 

Mama sparks into heavy, brash Urdu, all of it aimed at your father who more than deserves it- these are his spawn. 

You try to think through your feelings, try to sort them into neat and tidy boxes but it just winds you. 

You can't take deep breaths, they’re all shallow and sharp. Your chest aches, a concave feeling to it as you worry about the sharpness of your breath. It only worsens your ability, your breathing even shallower and you can’t seem to stop the cycle. 

You reach for your phone, pulling up a breathing video and trying your best to follow it, your breathing evening the longer you follow along. 

When you can inhale fully, you call Remus. You need him. 

He picks up on the second ring, “Hi, dovey. Everything okay?” 

“I think I should’ve let you come.” Your voice sounds ragged, like you need to cry and Remus’ skin prickles. He wishes he was there too. 

“Need me to come up there?” You debate it, you really do, and maybe if you didn’t feel like such a shitty person right now you would’ve said ‘no,’ but you need Remus and his sound mind and advice. 

“It’s a thirty minute drive.” you say, hearing things rustling in the back and Remus moves the phone from his mouth as he calls to someone. 

“I’m heading out, text me if you need anything.” Then the phone is closer. “Just had to tell Siri and Jamie. I’m on my way, princess.” 

“Drive safely, Remmy.” you sound so sad, Remus wishes he could just apparate to you now. 

“I’ll see you soon, baby. Stay somewhere safe, yeah.”

Tears gather in your eyes at how easily Remus could tell that you were frightened, that you’re in need of some place soft to land. God, you can’t wait for him to be here. 

The front door opens, your older brother coming out on the porch with a heavy sigh. 

“You have to tell them Bebo,” he says softly and you shake your head. 

“Why? So they can think I’m just lying to make him look bad. I’m okay with this arrangement.” 

Your brother takes a seat on the porch swing and pats a spot next to him. 

“Are you actually?” You inhale, thinking it over for a brief moment. 

“It hurts, of course it does. But I used to be mean too, this is them being mean back.” 

Your brother rolls his eyes, “It’s not like they’re ten. They’re sixteen and they’re horrid.” You take your spot next quickly- like if you chance a slow moment the tears will come. 

“But just to me. You get to be the best sibling they have, while I’m the problem black sheep sibling who can’t help but be macabre.” 

“You’re not macabre. You know you’re not. You just lived some dark shit to spare them and it’s time to stop. They can handle it.” You wish you could do it, it might make things easier, but you’re scared. 

“Maybe next time, it’s too charged in there now.” You sigh, head touching the back of the swing. “Do you think I’ll ever have their love?” The tears stream down your cheeks anyway as you think about the idea, as you hear their words rattle around your head. 

Your brother sighs hard, not sure if your siblings would ever wake up from your dad’s spell. Instead of saying anything, he guides your head to his shoulder. “Take a nap, Bebo.” 

“Remus is coming soon. Would you wake me when he gets here?”

“‘Course, Bebo.”

Your grandmother comes out right after you fall asleep, touching your sticky cheek with a weathered hand. 

“They’ll break her, you know. They’ll break her spirit and she won’t hold back anymore.” She sounds sad, like she can see it happening already.

“Mama, she won’t break.”  your brother says, reaching for her but she bats him away. 

“She’s not like you. You brush it off, she can’t. It weighs her heart. Every time she leaves here she looks so sad, so heavy and cracked. I can’t see her crack again, do you remember it?” 

Tears fall down her cheeks, but she doesn’t try to wipe them, she just stares at your sleeping form. 

Your brother sighs, leaning on her shoulder as she sits on his other side. “I remember,” he says quietly, the memories of you being withdrawn dancing behind his eyes. “Her boyfriend is coming here.”

“Really?” She asks and your brother nods. 

“She told me to wake her up when he gets here.” 

Mama smiles, “I’m glad she called him.” 

Remus arrives about forty minutes later, your brother sitting beside you about to shake your shoulder when Remus steps out of the car and shakes his head. 

“Let her sleep a little,” your brother’s confused by his request. 

“She asked me to wake you when you get here.” 

Remus smiles despite his anger. He’d stewed all the way to your dad’s house, wondering if you’d be hurt, if you’d not find a quiet place and the argument would keep going. 

He didn’t know what he was walking into, and finding you asleep is much more welcome than the sadder visions of his brain. 

“Would you tell me what it’s all about? Or what sparked it all today?” 

Remus sits on the floor near the foot of the swing, his hand holding onto your ankle as he looks to your brother. 

It’s clear to him, your brother, that Remus cares about you. His eyes haven’t strayed from you for more than thirty seconds, always coming back to rove over your face like he’s making sure you’re still there and still okay. 

Your brother hesitates- he’s never spoken about this with someone outside of the family. “They have warped perceptions of her; our younger brother and sister. They think she’s ungrateful and just doesn’t come home to get dad riled up- she doesn’t come home because they don’t know what she’s done so they didn’t have to get the dad we got.” 

Remus frowns harder, his thumb rubbing a circle on your ankle. 

“And she doesn’t want to tell them?” There’s no judgement in his tone, just curiosity. 

Your brother shakes his head. “She doesn’t think they’d believe her at this point. I’m always trying to talk her into it, but I think it runs a bit too deep to dredge up just like that.” 

Remus nods, eyes fixated on you as you sleep. “Will she want to tell them goodbye?” 

Your brother smiles, “If you leave without meeting our grandma, I think she’ll never forgive you for leaving without her ice cream.” 

Remus laughs, nodding as he stands. 

“You should wake her up first, I’ll go tell Mama you’re here.” Remus waits till your brother walks off into the house to sit beside you. 

You’re not sure how long you’ve been asleep, but sometime later you feel Remus’ hand on your cheek, thumb a little calloused as it rubs at the apple. 

Only he wakes you up this gently. 

“Princess, wake up. Miss your face.” 

“Hey,” your eyes peel open slowly, a little smile spreading on your face. 

Remus’ smile is small, but not forced. He could never do that with you looking up at him- especially with your sleepy eyes. 

“Was the drive okay?” 

He chuckles, it’s belated that you notice you’re alone with him on your front porch. Your brother’s car is still parked outside and so is your grandmother’s. 

“Yeah it was, pretty girl.” 

Remus kisses your forehead, his hand holding your face even though it’s a little sticky with your dried tears. 

“Your brother went to get Mama.” He says softly, letting you twist your body so you were leaning into him. Your entire front body was pressing against his ribs. 

“I’m so tired, Remmy.” Your voice cracks as you speak, Remus can’t bear it. He hates it that you’re this sad. 

“I know baby,” his words are whispered into your hairline, his hand moving to cup the back of your head as he feels the quiet tears soak his shirt. “We don’t have to stay here any longer than you want to.” 

You sniffle and nod, letting Remus pull you further into his lap so he can hold you. 

“This is Mama,” you hear your brother’s voice and the light steps of your grandmother and then feel Remus lean forward. You assume he wanted you off his lap, but his hand anchors your hip to his as he shakes the older woman’s hand. 

“Remus.” He introduces himself and she smiles. 

“You’re handsome,” you laugh when you catch Remus’ cheeks flushing. “I have your ice cream here, Bebo. He won’t come out, locked himself away in his office.” 

You shrug, “Doesn’t matter. I’m ready to go.” Remus nods, taking the tub of ice cream for you, letting you climb off his lap before standing. 

“Give me two minutes, baby.” You kiss his jaw as you go, the car keys in your hand.

“She’ll be okay right?” 

Your brother smiles at Remus, Mama frowns. 

“She’s a fighter.” He says but Mama shakes her head. 

“She might not have any more fight left in her.” 

Remus knows what she means to say. He remembers how Sirius had been, the brave faces and attitude to hide how sad he was. He looks at the car and spots you with your head against the glass. 

“Just be patient with her.” Mama says and Remus nods.  “She’ll tell you everything soon enough. She looks at you like you individually hung the stars.” 

Remus blushes again, not really knowing what to say. 

Your older brother pats his shoulder and goes inside, “I think I’ll head out too.” He goes to his car, but not before stopping at Remus’ and giving you a kiss to your forehead. 

Remus frowns, “Does everyone disperse after they fight like this?” He asks your grandmother, not wanting to push but trying to understand. 

“Bebo can’t take more of this, you’ll see. I set him straight, he leaves her alone for months and then starts over. It’s like a cat and a mouse- always prodding and slapping and poking until the mouse has had enough.” 

“And the mouse does what when they’ve had enough?” 

Mama smiles, like she’s holding out just a sliver of hope that it will happen. “Revolt.” 

Remus gives her a hug and makes his way to the car. 

As soon as he opens the door, you smile. Tired lines all over your face as your eyes barely open. 

“Wanna stay over?” You ask, cheek smushed to your shoulder as you look at Remus. 

“How abouts you come over to mine? I’ve got fluffy blankets,” Remus kisses that spot where your forearm and upper arm meet. “Oatmeal raisin and chocolate chip cookies,” a kiss to your shoulder, right on the beauty mark. “And I’ve got all your favourites on dvd.” 

The last kiss is right on the corner of your mouth, chaste and sweet and it makes you smile even more. 

“Sirius and James won’t mind?” 

Remus rolls his eyes, “They’ve gone on their own lover’s retreats today.” Wrong, Remus kicked them out the second he’d hung the phone with you. 

“Okay, but can we stop by my place to get my stuffy?” 

Remus chuckles, “Course we can, dovey. That way we’ll both have clothes at each other’s place.” 

You tut, clipping on your seatbelt as Remus turns over the engine. “You’re not getting your sweater back, Remus.” 

He only rolls his eyes as he pulls out of your dad’s yard, tipping his chin to the ice cream tub. “Will that be okay on the drive?” 

You nod, “Yeah, we can have some with the cookies tonight.” 

[evanpeterswhoresblog]

Cherry Bomb (pt. 2)

James Potter x f!reader, Sirius Black x f!reader (mentioned)

warnings: smut, unprotected p in v, oral (male receiving), oral (female receiving), switch james? brief fingering, heavy making out, i love this smut w my heart

summary: you proceed with the second part of your plan. james potter.

word count: 2.4k

a/n: i’m so bad at writing summaries i’m sorry, i promise it’s worth it lol. i suppose this could be a stand off but i like reading them in order. hope you enjoy :) also ps if there’s any mistakes i’m sorry grammarly told me it was fine but i don’t fully trust that hoe smh

~~~

James Potter was a different story. He thought of himself as a gentleman though not many seventeen-year-olds were gentlemen. He thought this solely because he was nothing like his best mate. He had to at least know a girl's name before taking her to bed. Though, he typically liked to know a bit more than just that. So, in order to shag James Potter, one must abide by a few more rules than with dear Sirius Black. One, she must be friendly. Two, she must have some knowledge of quidditch. Three, she must be willing to stroke his massive ego despite how humiliating it may be. And four, the most important rule, she must be ready to play along with his games. Because James Potter was a chaser in all senses. And oh, how he loved a good chase.

~~~

You peak around the corner of one of the hallways, a bit out of breath. You just ran down a few flights of stairs to get here. For a few seconds you search the hallway, then he appears. He’s alone. Good.

It’s been two weeks since your night with Sirius, and it hasn’t been easy. You regret your whole show of making him remember your name, it’s caused more harm than good. But it felt good in the moment, it felt more than good. Shagging Sirius all together became your best shag the second he pressed you against the wall and kissed you till you were out of breath. You regret picking him first. In retrospect though, you had no idea how much he’d care for a second time. He’s always been known as a one-nighter. It’s been hard having to deny him, and it’s been hard convincing him that he has you mistaken for another girl. But you’ve managed.

You feel bad about it, but you try not to pay it much mind as the second part of your plan is about to begin.

You clutch your books to your chest and begin to walk down the hallway, your face down. You know what his shoes look like. So, when they begin to come closer you loosen your grip on your books and shift your body ever so slightly so that you’re in his way. Inevitably, the two of you bump into each other, and your books quickly fall to the floor.

“Shit,” you say as you fall to your knees to start gathering your things.

“Sorry love, didn’t see you there. Let me help,” he replies, crouching down in front of you.

You look at him. “Oh, it’s alright, I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Me either.” He laughs, handing you one of your papers. His eyes linger on yours. “I think I know you.”

“I doubt it.”

“No, I do. You’re the girl my mate Sirius thinks he shagged.”

You look away, pretending to be flustered. “I don’t know why he’s so set on me. I mean, I was at that party, but I went back to my dorm with my friend. And I think I’d remember a night with him you know, with his reputation.”

“Yeah, I dunno, he tends to get hammered and forget a lot,” he says. You look back at him and watch as he runs one of his hands through his dark curls. A habit of his. “I’m sure he’ll stop bothering you soon enough.”

“Yes, when the next girl is in his bed,” you reply. The two of you share a laugh and you pick up your last paper. You hold them close to your chest and stand, he follows. “Well thanks for helping, you’re very kind.”

He smiles that brilliant smile of his. “It’s only right.”

You return the smile. “I’ve got to get to class thanks again James.”

“You know my name? Are you one of my adoring fans?”

He’s smirking now, his arms folded across his chest. His ego is taking over. Perfect.

You shyly look down for a few seconds before meeting his eyes again. “Isn’t everyone a fan of the famous chaser from Gryffindor?”

“You’d be surprised how many aren’t.”

“Well, that lot must simply consist of fools.” You look down at your watch. “Seems I’m going to be a bit late to history of magic. ‘Suppose it’s alright, I don’t care for it much anyway. But I best be going, wouldn’t want to keep you from your class.”

“That’s quite kind of you y/n,” he says.

You raise a brow. “Oh? Do you happen to be one of my adoring fans?”

“Perhaps, or perhaps Sirius has been talking our ears off about you.”

“I think I like the first answer better.”

He smirks. “I see. It was nice running into you then. Literally.”

“Yes, it was.” You step past him, your eyes lingering on him for a few more seconds. “Goodbye then James.”

“Goodbye y/n.”

You leave fast with a smile on your face.

Phase one is complete.

~~~

For the next two weeks, you have more of those run ins with James. Each time having a different reaction. Some end in a sweet goodbye, some end with you barely acknowledging him at all, and some end in a quick walk through the halls together. You know how it messes with his head. One day you’re a girl who strokes his ego with flattering compliments, and another day you brush past him as if he doesn’t exist. By the sixth encounter, you relish in the knowledge that he’s starting to bump into you. Not the other way around.

“I’m starting to get Sirius. I suppose he wishes it was you that he shagged.”

The two of you are walking alone, not another person is in the hall. You look up at him, your cheeks flushing when you find him already looking down at you. He runs his hand through his hair. You hate how it makes your stomach fill with butterflies. You turn your head away.

“I don’t know why he would wish that with me.”

“I could name a few reasons,” he says.

You’ve stopped walking at this point. You turn your body to face him, another shy smile on your face. James Potter is such a charmer. You’ve known this. Yet his words affect you as if you have no idea about his reputation of being a flirt.

This is bad, you think.

It’s been hard enough resisting the urge to take Sirius up on another night together, even harder keeping up the lie that it never happened. You should stop this before it gets any worse, you know that. However, from the look James is giving you, you know you won't be able to stop this no matter how hard you try.

“Yeah?” You eventually challenge. “What reasons might those be Mr. Potter?”

“For starters, you are incredibly fit.” You watch his eyes trail up and down your body for a few seconds before returning to yours. “You’re kind, you’re funny, you make your interest noticeable, but you aren’t desperate.”

“I never claimed to be interested in you though, that’s an assumption.” You point out.

He takes a step closer to you, your breath catches in your throat. “So, if I were to, I dunno, snog you right now, you wouldn’t be pleased?”

Despite everything in your head screaming at you to snap out of it and push him away for the plan's sake, you can’t. No matter how hard you plan it seems that James Potter’s charm outdoes it. You don’t dare to move a muscle.

“I’m not sure, you might have to test and see.”

He takes another step. “I don’t want to be hexed though, if this experiment ends in the possibility of you not liking it.”

You take a step forward. The two of you are so close you can practically feel the heat radiating off his body.

“Probability and possibility are different you know.”

He lifts one of his hands to your chin, tilting it up ever so slightly. “So, it’s a possibility that you’ll push me off and hex me, and it’s a probability that you’ll...”

“Snog you harder.”

“Well, I suppose I’ll take my chances then.”

He begins to lean his head down, and you can’t stop yourself from leaning yours up, meeting him halfway. The first few seconds are gentle. You like how soft his lips are, how you can taste the mint chap stick on them. But once that initial new feeling fades so does the gentleness.

Within a few short minutes you’re no longer standing in the middle of a hallway being kissed as if it were your first. Instead, you’re pressed against the wall in a broom closet, with your shirt half unbuttoned and James Potter’s hand up your skirt. Your head falls back against the stone as he sucks the sweet spot on your neck, his thumb rubbing perfect circles on your clit. You run your hands through his curls, they’re just as soft as you expected.

“James,” you moan.

“Yes love?”

You struggle to catch your breath. “I don’t- we can’t- fuck.”

“Hm?” He presses his thumb down harder; you feel your orgasm approaching. “You alright?”

“Yes- just don’t stop,” you reply.

He lifts his head, his dark eyes meeting yours. “Whatever you want.”

It’s safe to say, after that, phase two is completed.

~~~

Another week passes before you reach phase three. You don’t know why but playing James’s game is awfully fun. You know you’ve got him, and he knows he’s got you, but neither of you will say it. So, before anything can move too far in the closets, one of you stops it with an excuse and the other doesn’t question it. Part of you keeps it going because you want him to say the words, and another part of you keeps it going because deep down you don’t want it to be over yet.

But everything must end eventually.

The game's ending comes on a quiet Friday night. James catches you after dinner, dragging you off to one of the now familiar closets. He wastes no time, instantly pressing his lips to yours the second the door closes. There’s a desperation on his lips you haven’t felt before, it excites you. Naturally, you kiss him back, your hands moving up to his hair, his moving down to your waist.

Only a few seconds pass like this, then he pulls back. You can barely see his eyes through the darkness, but what you can see tells you something different is going to happen. He’s starving and you are more than happy to give him a taste.

“Can I have you y/n?” He whispers.

“Have me?”

He nods, his hands roaming up your sides. You shiver. “I need it, need you. Now.”

“You can have me, as long as you promise to keep this between us.” You place your hands on his shoulders and push him till his back hits one of the walls. “We wouldn’t want Sirius to be jealous that you actually got to shag me. You haven’t told any of them about this have you?”

“I have not, and I won’t. I swear,” he answers. “You can trust me.”

You smile and press a small kiss to his lips before lowering yourself to your knees. “I know I can. You’re a very sweet guy James and for that I’m going to show my appreciation.”

“You don’t have to-”

You begin to undo his belt. “I want to.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

You unzip his trousers and pull away the fabric. You’re not surprised to find him already hard. You also aren’t surprised at how big he is. From the girls you’ve known to have shagged him, only good things came from them. You don’t waste any more time. You take him in your mouth and as far down your throat as possible. Blow jobs have never been your favorite activity, but from the sound that leaves James’s lips you know you’ll enjoy this specific one.

And you do.

You don’t know how much time passes by the time he’s cumming down your throat, but you do know you’ve enjoyed every moment. He moans your name louder than he should, his fingers tangled in your hair as he cums. Typically, you’d spit but this time you swallow. When you’re sure he’s done you pull back and rise, whipping your drool with the back of your hand.

James is breathless when he reaches for you. He doesn’t hesitate to kiss you, nor to return the favor. Your legs shake as he buries his face between them, licking and sucking your clit at a perfect rhythm. It’s not long before it’s your turn to come undone due to his mouth. You have to hold yourself up on the wall as you finish, you practically see stars.

You pull him back up a minute later and wrap your arms around his neck. He kisses you once again and you savor the taste of yourself on his lips. It’s like a prize. And a memory you will forever cherish.

“Fuck me James,” you whisper eventually. “Like you mean it.”

“Your wish is my command,” he replies.

His hands fall to your thighs, and he lifts you up. You comply, wrapping your legs around his waist as he positions his hard again cock at your entrance. He enters you slowly, both of you savoring the feeling. He stretches you in an indescribable way that makes your toes curl. You hold him tight as he begins to fuck you.

Due to his active role in quidditch, his stamina is very built. He fucks you through two more orgasms before he even begins to show a sign of finishing. Tears role down your cheeks from the overstimulation, he asks you if you want to stop. You shake your head. He continues. Each thrust hits that spot inside you that makes your eyes roll back into your head. When he does eventually finish, he fills you up, his dick pulsing inside you.

He holds you tight after, his face tucked in your neck.

“You’re amazing,” he mumbles, his breath ragged. “I think I’d like to keep you.”

In this moment, you forget about your plan, and you turn your head to press a soft kiss to his sweaty head.

“I wouldn’t mind that.”

~~~

As you lie in bed that night with your diary in hand, a fresh checkmark next to James’s name, you wonder how you’re supposed to go on to the next part. Too many emotions have gotten involved from you, James, and Sirius. You know adding another person into the mix will only cause further issues. However, you also did save the best for last. Intentionally. At least, you think so anyway. James and Sirius have given you times you didn’t know you could ever have.

But then your eyes trail over the last name again.

Remus Lupin.

The show must go on.

[hauntedwitch04]

Fallen angel

Priest!Remus Lupin x reader

Words: about 1.8k words

Warnings: smut, corruption kink, swearing, kinda voyeurism, not proofreaded

Author’s note: Hi loves! New day new kink, hope you like it, your witch Becky

Requests are open I Ask

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DAY 14: Innocence

Remus knows it is wrong, but sinning has never been sweeter.

You came for Mass as you did every Sunday, together with your family. Remus always took a few minutes to look at you as you sat in the front row, in your usual cream and powder-pink dress, your little white shoes and the pink headband in your hair. If he hadn't known better, the young priest would certainly have thought you were an angel.

Throughout the mass he tried never to look at you, knowing that he would then have to hide a very obvious erection that would be very difficult to explain.

You are his forbidden dream and his most terrible perversion.You, with your air so graceful and your soul so good, were the one who would make even a saint sin, and Remus is convinced of this. There is no mortal soul according to him who would not think of your lips, your breasts, your legs in a sinful way.

Once the sacred service was over and the faithful were greeted, Remus headed for the confessional, knowing that a couple of people would be coming in seeking absolution. Usually he was not the one to hear confessions, but Father James, who, however, due to commitments could not do so today, so he had asked Remus to do so. At that thought he could not help but smile, thinking how he could ever grant absolution, when at night she often dreamed of you, as he fucked you, as you lay naked on top of the church altar.

Remus has been sitting in the confessional for a while, listening to people's sins and assuring them that God would forgive them if they showed a willingness to absolve themselves, when he decides to leave since there are other things to do and it has been several minutes since anyone came in after the last one who had come in, a man who had cheated on his wife with his sister.

The moment he is about to leave that cramped space, however, he hears your voice caressing the air.

"Father James, I should confess." You say in a voice slightly louder than a whisper.

Remus knows it is wrong the shiver that runs down his spine as he feels the sensation of desire growing inside him. He sits back as he wonders whether to tell the truth or to lie and pretend to be his friend, knowing that this would only be the beginning of the series of sins he would be thinking and doing, moments from now, imagining you kneeling beside him.

"Go ahead my child." Whispers the young priest as he imitates his colleague's voice.

"Father, I have sinned. The devil has taken me by the hand and led me down an evil road." You comment as you wring your hands.

"What have you ever done that is so terrible? You are an angel on earth, you cannot disappoint the Lord." Remus comments, as he feels his pants getting tighter and tighter, in imagining your lips inches away from his lap, separated only by a thin perforated wooden panel.

"I've been thinking about so many wrong things." You pause for a moment and then ask a question. "Father, if I tell you, you will never tell anyone right?"

"Of course angel, no one but me, you and Our Lord will ever know what you are going to tell me." Remus says, trying to reassure you; you nod and go on.

"Father, the other night I had a dream-a sex dream. I was-I was with this boy and he was touching my whole body, then his hands stopped...right there." You say, and Remus immediately closes his eyes, throwing his head back, praying himself not to come at that same moment in his pants.

"It was probably all because of that movie my friend showed me where there's a sex scene, since I've never been intimately with any man, but here's that's not the worst part."

"Oh no?" Remus asks, instinctively, as he feels his self-control slipping through his fingers as he puts his hand on the button that fastens his pants.

"No, because then when I woke up...here I didn't really know what I was doing, but I felt that I was very wet in my underwear and I didn't understand why."

"God child, what have you done?" Remus comments under his breath, not thinking you could hear him as he pulls his cock out of his pants and begins to massage it, since by now the erection was becoming too painful.

"Yes father, I know I sinned a lot, I know because then I did something I'm very ashamed of. I touched myself down there, and-and I think I gave myself pleasure." You confess, your voice almost on the verge of tears. Remus tightens his hand around your cock as he takes a deep breath and stops his movements, knowing that if he continued he would come in seconds.

"What exactly did you do my dear? How did you touch yourself?" Remus asks in a rough voice as he hears you fidgeting on the other side of the grate.

"But Father, I would sin one more time if I repeated it out loud." You comment frightened, as you feel your white panties getting wet again, under the pink skirt you wear.

"No my child. God, and I, need to know what exactly you have done, to absolve your sins, of course." You try to explain Remus convincingly. A few seconds of stalemate pass before you respond.

"You are right Father, I am so foolish. I'll tell you what I did then." You say, in a tone of conviction, before being interrupted again by the young priest.

"I think though if you just told it you might forget some things, and we definitely don't want something like that to happen right?"

"No Father, absolutely not. What do you recommend I do then?" You ask eager to please the priest.

"Why don't you try to do again what you did that night, too. Try touching yourself the same way you gave yourself pleasure as you tell me about it, try thinking about who you were thinking about that night as you came on your fingers." Remus says, and you feel a shiver run down your spine as hesitantly a hand immediately goes to the hem of your skirt. You spend a few seconds assessing the situation and then decide to do as Father advises, so you bring your right hand inside your white panties, and with one finger you brush your pussy, feeling how wet it is. This slight gesture of yours makes you moan, and Remus can't help but imagine you under him as you make all those lovely sounds.

"That's right, keep touching yourself while you tell me how you sinned bimbo." Remus says, taking his erection back in his right hand as some pre-cum slides from the tip to the base. The sensitive tip of his cock feels the drafts of air coming in through the small door in front of him, and he can't help but think those are the correspondence of your labored breathing.

"I put my hand in my panties, and with my middle finger I began to caress my..."

"Say it my child, don't be ashamed, it's more than natural."

"About my pussy. Slowly I started to move my finger around, to see if it really feels as much pleasure as it said in the movie, and that's how I found out that it does, but it takes time. Then after a few minutes of touching her, I tried to stick a finger inside."

"Did you like it?"

"Not so much at first, then after a few times I was going back and forth, like he did in the movie, I started to like him a lot, however I couldn't get to the pleasure." You continue, while touching yourself in the same way you are telling it, however the pleasure this time comes much faster than the first time, as you already feel on the verge of orgasm.

"And how did you get to orgasm baby?" Remus asks, as he knows he too is getting closer and closer to reaching the pinnacle of pleasure.

"I imagined it was someone else doing those things on me." You confess shyly between moans. Your hand is completely wet, and your fingers are also cramping, but you don't care.

"And who were you thinking of?"

"To Father Remus. "You whisper in a low voice as a wave of embarrassment washes over you. "Father James please absolve me, please remove this stain from my soul, I cannot live knowing I will end up in the clutches of Mephistopheles." You pray as your fingers quicken.

"Cum. And I will absolve you my child, come now my little fallen angel." Remus says, before coming himself with powerful spurts, in his own hand, as he imagines you convulsing after your orgasm, your plump lips wide open as you moan and your sinful chest poking out of your dress.

At the same time you come around your fingers, moaning and rolling your eyes in pleasure as you feel every muscle in your body contract and relax without you having control over anything.

"Father am I absolved?" You ask with bated breath, as you adjust your skirt, and try to make yourself presentable again. Remus struggles to catch his breath too, especially as he thinks back to the final confession you made: you think of him when you have to give yourself pleasure.

Part of him would like to console you by saying that he is not just thinking about the other person to get to orgasm, but knowing that this is not the case, he decides to adopt another technique.

"Of course my dear, no sin stains your candid soul anymore, just a piece of advice. Just the next one I advise you to go and report these kinds of sins and problems directly to Father Remus, he is a very open-minded man who specializes in the kind of problem you have child."

"What is my problem, Father?" You ask fearfully.

"I think it's really a sex demon, angel." At Remus's words you wince, but he immediately heartens you. "Don't worry baby, he's very good and will know how to help you, but it's important that you don't tell anyone about your condition, okay?"

"Of course Father James, thank you for the advice, I will go right away and talk to Father Remus tomorrow."

"Good, very good my sweet fallen angel." He says, before saying goodbye and hearing you leave.

TAGLIST

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[szasfuckingwife]

DESIRE- pt 1

KING!SATORU X QUEEN READER

WARNINGS: arranged marriage, minor misogyny, dysfunctional family relationship

A/N: I am quite excited for this series, lets just see if I don’t give up on it halfway through, lol

series master list —> part two

It was far late from noon when one of your ladies ran into your room. Just when you thought your duties for the day were done, here comes another. Although it may seem easy living in your estate as princess with a thousand maids at your beck and call, you were also being groomed and moulded to be the best queen for your country.

“Your highness, your father writes to you.” She has a white letter in her hands. Knowing her, you wouldn’t be surprised if she opened the letter and read it herself.

A sigh leaves your lips as you hear it’s from your father, the king. Feigning a healthy father-daughter relationship was harder than it looks. In reality, you hadn’t seen your father regularly since he sent you to live in Seymour Manor when you were four. The only times you recall seeing him is during galas and balls where his attention is caught between the fine port being served or being involved in a dance, not you.

Your thumb grazed over the red Royal seal that your father was known for. Reluctantly, you open the letter, reading the words carefully.

To my darling daughter,

I hope the standards and degree of the manor has provided you with the upmost guidance as you reach this new age of womanhood. I wish to see you again as we approach our new season.

However, I do not write you to discuss your wellbeing, unfortunately. I wish to discuss your betrothal to Sir Satoru Gojo of the Gojo clan. His father, the head of the Gojo clan, wishes to see you and his son marry before the year ends.

I will not hasten you, daughter. But, as princess of our great kingdom, I do wish to see what you will do once you become queen. More importantly, if you will produce an heir that will continue our great monarchy. I rest assured knowing the nannies and ladies at Seymour Manor have groomed you into being the perfect wife to Satoru and the perfect queen for our nation.

May God be with you,

Your father.

This is the 5th letter he’s sent about this Satoru Gojo since some months ago. You crumble it up and throw it behind you, like you’ve done before. Who is he to rush you into marrying a man you’ve never met? You’ve hardly ‘met’ with your father.

“Augusta, remind our mailman that I will not receive any more letters from my father-” “But, your highness..” Your maid interrupts.

You look at her softly, “My father must be having you all nervous. Trust me, Augusta, that man is not to be feared. Oh, are you scared? You shouldn’t be. Tell the mailman it is the princess’ direct orders.”

“Your highness…” She sighs. “A carriage awaits you outside from the palace. Along with your bags…”

She sees your features soften as you come to the realisation. The joints in your body stiffened up as you blinked at her a couple more times, trying to spot dishonesty. But, to no avail.

You were getting sent down to the palace, whether you liked it or not.

“My lady-” “Very well.” You purse your lips as you exit the room.

The manor became smaller and smaller as you begin your journey. Memories of you playing with toys when you were a toddler and running around in the outside fields plague your mind.

It was home. No mother. No father. No worries. Just the maids and nannies raising you into the open minded woman you are. They were the mother(s) you never had. It made you fear how quickly your happiness could be snatched away.

“Excited, my lady?” Your father’s footman asked. God knows why he was selected to chaperone your travel. He saw you glare at him before returning your gaze back yo the window.

“Take this as an opportunity, your highness. Soon, you will be married and produce a surplus amount of heirs for your kingdom.” He says, a little too excitedly.

You sigh. “James?”

He sits up, “Yes, my lady?”

“Stop talking.” You sarcastically smile.

As you arrive to the palace, you see your father stand outside the front stairs of the palace. He looks mighty in his royal clothing, a proud smile adorns his face as your carriage comes to a stop, like he raised you.

It was unnerving seeing your father standing alone. It was just last winter where your mother succumb to a terrible illness and met her maker. If you weren’t in this predicament you’re in now, you’d count that as the most depressive moment in your life.

Your father’s footman offered his hand, helping you step out of the carriage. The king speed walked down the steps, grinning from ear to ear. You curtsey in front of him, almost second nature to you.

“Hello, father,” the words leave your mouth bitterly. “How are you?”

“Better now you are here, darling.” His eyes squinted as he smiled. “Please, tell me, how was your travel?”

Another fake smile plasters your face, “A little home sick. However, I was fine.”

His fave dropped, “Well, this is your home now, dear. You are at rest when you are here.”

You watch him as he takes a deep breath in, “That is good. Well, what are you all waiting for?! Accompany my daughter with her things as she settles into her new home.”

You’re left with your thoughts as you sit on your new bed. The only thing that comes to mind is how your freedom is gone and now in the hands of this Satoru Gojo.

Wonders of his appearance come flooding into your mind. What would he look like? He could be some scrawny adolescent. No, your father couldn’t give the title of ‘King’ to a child. Maybe he was an old man. As old as your father. His belly round and his hair fading.

Goosebumps plague your skin as someone suddenly walks into your room.

“My lady, the garments have arrived.” A maid walks in.

Your brow raises, “Garments? I did not send for garments.”

She smiles, “My apologies, your betrothed sent them.” Some more people walk in, holding beautiful dresses. They contrast your everyday dresses you wear back home, where the thoughts of marriage never crossed your mind and days ended when you passed out in the fields.

“My betrothed..?”

“He sent these for you to wear tonight during dinner. It’ll be you, him, his mother and father and of course, the King.” She says merrily. “He must be enamoured by your beauty.”

Your brow rises, the fabric used is clearly expensive and foreign. Silky satin and the brightest purple that has ever met the eye. It was all too grand. A huge contrast from your country-house dresses you grew to love.

But beautiful nonetheless.

Whoever this Gojo Satoru was, he was playing his cards right.

Everything tells you to run out of the palace gates as you head downstairs for dinner. If you took off your shoes, you could make it to the town hall. Or was it the boutique?

It had been so long you’ve forgotten what surrounds the palace. Soldiers would definitely catch you within seconds.

A sound of laughters interrupts your thoughts. It’s your father’s and someone else’s. Before you could even breathe into the room, you are held back as you remember you are to be announced.

“Her highness, Princess Y/N!” A butler announced.

All murmurs stop as you walk in the room. The Gojo clan stood up upon your arrival. You noticed the smiles of the mother and the father and then your eyes landed on a man no other suitor could compare to.

His hair was snow white, it reminded you of snowy days where you cosied up to the fire place. His eyes were cerulean, bright and blue. But his stare made you feel small. The way he looked at you, like he was analysing your demeanour, how you walked, how you carried yourself.

They all bowed as you took your seat. “Pleasure to meet you, your highness.” The head of the Gojo clan grinned. “Your father has spoken highly of you. He’s assured you will be the perfect fit for our son.”

So, this is the infamous Satoru Gojo. The way they spoke of him, as if he is the prize. It was hard to not be egotistical considering you were, quite frankly, the future queen.

“Yes. This is a momentous occasion. We are currently witnessing the start of the of the next generation. I’m confident that Gojo will be a great king.”

You sit there, waiting for your father to mention you and how great you will take care of your kingdom. But your wishes were never grabted, they moved onto another topic swiftly.

Throughout dinner, Satoru kept locking eyes with you. Even with the jokes and banter your father and his were throwing about, his eyes lured you back in.

“We are to discuss the date of the wedding, and then the coronation. It should be quick and around the same time, we don’t want to string this along any more than we have.” The king spoke with a certain dominance that shook the bones of everyone in the room, but you of course.

Gojo’s father nodded, “Of course, your majesty. And may I thank you again for recognising Satoru as capable of being king.”

You clearly have missed a plethora of conversations and rumours of Satoru becoming king. “Yes, I see Satoru as the son I never had. He’s most capable of carrying this kingdom to glory.”

Satoru smiles for the first time during dinner, “I’m sure I’ll do that with the help of your daughter, your majesty. Every king needs his queen.”

You want to scoff.

“Of course. And then, hopefully, we’ll see Princess Y/N withchild very soon.” His father spoke. It made you sick how they spoke about you as if you weren’t there.

Suddenly, you felt something wet on your lap. As you look down, you notice the burgundy red wine staining your blush pink gown.

Gojo’s mother gasped, “Oh no, your gown..” You wonder if she was even worried about you embarrassing yourself or rather the fact her family spent a pretty dime on was ruined by your carelessness.

You take a deep breath in, already frustrated from the lack of communication regarding your own marriage and your father’s lack of awareness. “Pardon my absence for one moment..”

The party watches as you stand up and leave abruptly. Satoru notices as your father mumbles something about you being dramatic and unladylike. “I shall go check on her.” Satoru suggests.

“Satoru, you shouldn’t-” “I’m only to check on her welfare. She seemed conflicted tonight.”

The Gojo parents turn to look at the king who is now slumped over in his seat, “Very well.”

You seek comfort under the stars on a balcony, the atmosphere downstairs was too suffocating. It seemed you were a pawn in this big crown game.

“My lady.”

You gasp as you turn around to see the very man you grew to despise in a short amount of time. “Must you cut up my peace..?”

Satoru walked towards you slowly, “It’s a shame the dress is stained…This is the one I wanted you to specifically wear.”

His attempts at flirting made you sick. “I would thank you for the dress. But seeing its already ruined, I don’t think my appreciation would go far.”

Satoru nodded, “It is alright. Did you like your dresses? Were they a good fit? If not, I can get my men to-”

You hold up a hand, “Leave the other two. They are sufficient for gardening.”

He breathed out a chuckle, “Your highness, did I do something to offend you? If so, I do apologise. My father raised me to be a gentleman.”

Nothing leaves your lips as he responds. No smart remark, No rolling of your eyes, nothing. He was nicer than he seemed during dinner. However, you didn’t know what to trust. But something inside you told you to build some sort of relationship with him, considering you two will rule a nation together.

You scoffed as you remain your gaze on the environment, “Gentlemen? You…You hardly know me, why do you wish to be wed?”

“You are really magnificent, Y/N.” He whispers. The absence of formalities and honourifics threw you off immensely. He was now very close to you. It was only now you noticed how tall he was. “If I was just a commoner, I’d still want you as my bride.”

You blink up at him, “Satoru, if I am to be your bride, you can leave the theatrics at home. I’m not a child, I will not fall for such…dishonesty!”

“Dishonesty?” He chuckles once more, stroking the side of his face with his gloved hand, “Have you been like this with other suitors or just me?”

You look away. You’ve never had other suitors. Only him.

“Pardon me, Satoru, but I must go to my chambers. The sun is resting, and I shall rest with it. You don’t want to stop the future queen from receiving her sleep.” You begin to walk away from him.

“Trust me your highness, once wed, I plan to.” He mumbled.

Satoru sees you turn around swiftly staring at him with confusion. If it weren’t for his good looks, you would’ve sent the guards to behead him as quickly as possible. You open your mouth to say something but nothing comes out. Instead, you walk away.

[ljaylmaoo]

Unexpected

Hook x fem!la bouff!reader

UNEDITED

request: hello! i rarely do any requests but i was wondering if you could write a hook x fem reader where reader is charlotte la bouff's daughter (or if you want to make the timelines match up then charlottes sister) and she's rich and her and hook are secretly dating. thx!! 💕

summary: you and Hook have been secretly dating for the past six months but what happens when your sister Charlotte and best friend Bridget set you up on a date with someone who isn't him?

genre: fluff, a bit of angst?, and more fluff

warnings: mature in terms of language, mention of sex (not much), making out, kisses, argument, dirty joke made by Hook, i think that's it

a/n: sorry it took so long to get this out anon! life can sometimes be a pain in the butt lol, I fixed up a few things in this because i didn't like the way it was going but haven't actually read through it so if there's any errors i apologize. i may fix this up later when i have the time because i feel I could’ve done better but right now i'm just trying to finish the requests i got over the time of writing this. i hope you all enjoy :)

word count: 4.7k

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

“I’m sorry, you two did what?”

You stared at the two bubbly girls who stood in front of you who buzzed with excitement, an almost horrified expression plastered across your face, "we set you up on a blind date for tomorrow during lunch!" Your sister Charlotte repeated proudly as Bridget squealed from excitement beside her. Charlotte has always been obsessed with the idea of love and fairytales. Everything about it she has always adored since you were kids, 'The Frog Prince' being her favourite story growing up which had sparked her dream of finding her true love, preferably a prince, and marrying them one day and wanting the same for you. She was in love with love. Bridget was similar but really only wanted what was best for her loved ones. It wasn't just about love for her, she wanted everyone to succeed in any aspect of life, and as of right now for you, it was love.

Now the reason why the two decided to set you up themselves is because you never showed any interest in love and made it known that you didn't really care for it. Every time the topic came up with the two, you would simply go quiet or try to change the subject if it was directed to you as it always seemed to make you uncomfortable. You "despised" it. Or so they thought.

You gave them a disgusted look, "what! Why?" Bridget giggled, "well, we thought we would help you out. We know you're not the biggest fan of relationships and love.." she trailed off, "but maybe if this goes well, you'll see that it isn't as bad as much as you think!" She said with a hopeful tone, Charlotte nodding in agreement. You rolled your eyes and raised your voice a little, "no way!" making Bridgets smile falter slightly. You felt bad for your rude attitude towards them as you knew they only did this out of the goodness of their hearts and you knew where they were coming from.

You didn't actually "hate" love as much as you made it seem. In fact, you were already in a loving relationship of six months with none other than the James Hook, the pretty brunette pirate who was also a VK. But they didn't know that. No one knew about you and James. They couldn't. You and James established that in the very beginning of your relationship, reason being that James was a VK and you and your sister had a bit of a reputation for being rich and your father being well known for being the "most powerful" man of New Orleans. His friends would also give him a hard time if they found out he went for a "good kid" and one of Bridget's friends of all people.

"Come on, y/n! It's just one little lunch date!" Bridget begged you, her energetic voice going up an octave as she pleaded while the two trailed behind you down the corridor of the dormitory, their pleading eyes piercing through the back of your head, "yeah Y/n! What's the worst that could happen? I mean who knows? Maybe you'll enjoy it!" You scoffed, not daring to look at them, "and if I don't?" Your sister grabbed your arm and turned you to face them, stopping you from entering your dorm, "well, I guess you won't know unless you give it a chance." She said softly, "Please y/n.. we just want to show you that it isn't as bad as you think and that there's nothing to be scared of. Love is a beautiful thing that everyone should be able to experience at least once in their life. It's okay to be afraid, but it's not okay to let that fear get in the way of you having the chance to experience that for yourself. I get that you may not be ready for the whole seriousness of it but please at least give it a try just this once? Who knows, maybe you'll find your happily ever after. And if it doesn't work out then we will never bother you again about the topic. Promise." She swore while delicately placing her hand over her heart.

You stared into your sister's eyes taking in every word she said. You felt bad that you had been lying to them about hating love. You did in fact know the way it felt and yes, it truly was an amazing feeling. You just couldn't let them know your truth on why you've been so opposed to their sweet intentions of doing this for you. It's just lunch, right? They don't expect you to be anything special with this unknown person they've set you up with? After giving it a bit of thought, you decided to agree to their request.

You sighed, "fine. I'll do it." The two girls jumped in excitement, clapping their hands together, "but I'm only doing it so you'll stop bothering me about it." The two girls giggled, "I knew we could convince her!" Bridget beamed, Charlotte picking her up and spinning her around as she squealed, "I know! Now come on, we have some more planning to do! See ya tomorrow, sis!" She yelled as she and Bridget ran hand in hand back down the hall giggling as you watched. You shook your head and couldn't help but smile, letting out a small laugh, you loved making your friends happy.

You opened the door and proceeded inside your dorm, "a date, huh?" You stopped in your tracks and jumped as you heard the voice of your boyfriend and quickly glanced up to see James sitting up on the edge of your bed, "Jesus! How long have you been in here? School literally just ended" he laughed, "I had a free period" he replied, a vicious smirk growing, "Merlin had to deal with an emergency and cancelled class." You sighed, "oh no, what did you do this time?" You crossed your arms giving him a disapproving look, he stood up and strutted over to you, "oh don't worry love, it wasn't me this time." He caressed your face, "Morgs and Hades casted a levitation spell on the books in the library." He chuckled as he recalled, you shook your head and sighed, "and then..?" You waited for him to continue earning a confused look from him, "what?" You walked past him and over to your desk beside your bed, "I find it hard to believe that's all you guys did." You stated while placing your homework on your desk as he waited for you to continue, "it was obviously just a distraction." You finished

Hook cautiously wandered up to you with a slow pace, "okay, so maybe Mali and Uli might've also sprinkled something in the cookie batter for tomorrows dessert.." you raised your eyebrows, "I suggest you don't eat any.." he nervously laughed while sitting on your bed beside you, "but me personally no, I didn't do anything this time darling, promise." He took your hand and pulled you down to sit on the bed with him, "now, tell me about this date your sister and friend set up for you." He said in an almost disgusted tone. He always had trouble with hiding his judgmental facial expressions and tone of voice. You sighed, "James, it's just lunch."

"Yeah, but with another guy? Absolutely not." He declared while rolling his eyes at the thought of you being with anyone other than him. You turned to face him fully, "look I know how it sounds, but I only said yes to it because I knew they wouldn't stop begging me until I said yes." He shook his head, "nope, I'm sorry but I cannot let you go out with a boring goody good twat." You raised your eyebrows at his choice of words, and at the fact that he thinks he had the right to control you, it made you upset. "What gives you the right to be able to control what I do?" You sat up straighter on the bed as you stared at him in confusion, anger visible on your now furrowed brows "I'm sorry but I have no choice, James. They don't know that I'm already in a relationship with you and they can't. No one can. We both know that."

James was now upset, jealousy turning to anger as it pulsed through his veins, "yes I know that, obviously." He retorted in a rude tone, "I just don't understand why you still decided to agree to go on this date when you're already in a relationship. What? Just so you can make your annoying little friend and bratty sister happy?" You took a deep breath in anger and stood up, "okay, woah! First of all, you do not get to call Bridget and Charlotte names." You crossed your arms, "I know your hot headed and rather cruel friend group have a very strong disliking towards my friends because they aren't as miserable as them and actually enjoy life. But you do not get to call Bridget annoying or Charlotte a brat just because you're jealous at the fact that I have to go to lunch with someone I don't know and frankly, I don't even want to go on in the first place." James scoffed, "jealous? Me? Oh darling, never." He laughed. Obviously he was jealous, but he had a tendency to hide his insecurities with believable arrogance that even sometimes he started to believe himself.

You groaned in frustration, "yes, Hook! Jealous." You snapped back, "sometimes, actually no, most times you can be so arrogant and full of yourself it gets to be quite annoying." He stood up, your eyes following his figure as he proceeded to yell at you for "having the audacity to shit talk his friends". Your argument went back and forth for a good few minutes. Both taking shots at each other's friends and personalities until finally Hook stopped you when you got in his face about to drag on the argument, his hands rested on your arms as he sighed, "love" he started, the nickname instantly and involuntarily calming you down, your face resting as you waited for him to continue, "lets stop arguing shall we?" He took your hands in his, "this isn't healthy for us. Letting someone we both don't even know get in between us." You looked up into his brown doe eyes before getting pulled into a hug by him, "I'm sorry for getting angry at you. I just don't like the thought of you being with someone else." You eased into his arms, relaxing your tensed body, "I know, I don't like the thought of it either, but I'm doing it for my sister and B." The two of you made up, talking everything out that then lead to a heated make out session with you straddling his lap, hands tangled in his swept back hair as he held the small of your back with his hook and his hand up your shirt.

You both came to a halt at the sound of a knock at your door, fear in your eyes as you heard the sound of Charlotte and Bridget's voices from the other side calling your name, James instantly took his hand out from under your shirt and you jumped off his lap pulling him to hide behind the door. You quickly fixed yourself up before opening the door, "hey, what's up?" You said trying your best to sound as casual as possible, exhaling heavily. Charlotte eyed you with suspicion, "uh, why did you take so long to open the door?" You tilted your head, "yeah, and why are you so out of breath?" Bridget added, you quickly glanced at Hook who was trying his best to stay quiet, "I was in the middle cleaning my room." You lied, "ookay, well we just wanted to ask you about dessert because someone here decided to use all of her flour for the cupcake batches she made last night." Charlotte explained while glaring at Bridget, "hey! I'm sorry! I was working on a new recipe!" She turned to you who was simply staring at them, "it includes flamingo feathers" she explained, you only nodding in faux interest. "It doesn't mean you had to go and use up a whole bag of flour!" Charlotte replied. You sighed, looking over at James who was just as bored as you, listening to them bicker back and forth which was keeping you two from your previous activities. You rolled your eyes, "guys, guys, okay, guys.." You repeated, trying but failing to interrupt their argument, "you guys!" You finally raised your voice, gaining their attention, "what was it that you wanted to ask? I would love to get back to cleaning my room preferably sometime this week." you said sarcastically, the two girls snapping out of it, "oh, right. We were wondering if you were alright with the cookies from the cafeteria for dessert." You looked over at Hook who rapidly shook his head and mouthed the word 'no' reminding you about what they had done to the batter.

"Y/n?" You looked back over at them in panic, "uh, I don't like the cookies from there." You said, "too dry." Hook silently sighed in relief, "you're right. What about brownies then?" You shrugged, "yeah I'm fine with that." They smiled, "okay brownies it is then" You smiled back at them, "okay well now that that's settled, I need to get back to cleaning, I'll see you guys tomorrow?" They nodded and turned, "okay, bye Y/n/n!" You waved and closed your door exhaling. "god I thought they'd never leave" Hook admitted, fixing his hair. You turned to him letting out a small laugh, "sorry about that" coming closer to him, his hands finding their way back to your waist. The two of you enjoyed the thrill of sneaking around, finding the risk of people finding out about your relationship almost exhilarating. You cupped his face and continued kissing him.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

The next morning you were doing your make up before school when James swiftly snuck into your dorm, slamming the door shut behind him. You looked over at him, a look of distress evident on his face as he had his back rested up against the door. "You okay, love?" You questioned, "no!" He cried, you got up and walked closer to him, "why? Whats wrong?" You asked genuinely concerned. He ran up to you and pulled you into his arms, squeezing you tightly as he buried his head into the crook of your neck, "the thought that you have a date with someone else today has been killing me!" He whined. You couldn't help but giggle at his clinginess and jealousy, it was  rare for him not to mask it, there has been times like this before but it has never gotten this severe as you've never had to go on a date with someone other than him. You hugged him just as tight, "oh James, it's okay" you smiled, "how about tonight after curfew we can go to the garden and have a date of our own? A real one." You suggested. He slowly lifted his head off your shoulder and looked at you, "but what if he treats you better? What if you actually do end up falling in love with him and you'd want to be with him instead of me?" He rambled on, speaking the thoughts that had been invading his head all night and morning aloud. "Hey, hey, that's not gonna happen. I promise! No one can or will ever replace you my love." You kissed him softly, "plus no one's as handsome or attractive as you." He grinned, "yeah, I know" You playfully rolled your eyes, "exactly, I don't even have to tell you that cause you already know it's true." He continued smiling, "you don't, but I just like hearing it come out of that pretty mouth of yours." You scoffed and shook your head, "and yet I question why your ego's so big." You pulled away and went to sit back down at your vanity with him following behind, "well I'd probably say it's because the way you scream my name in bed like you did last ni-" you smacked his chest chest, "oh my god, shut up James." You scolded before sitting down on the chair, he only shrugged, "I'm just saying that I'd be surprised if everyone on your floor still don't know we're together after that." You glared at him and picked up your blush and brush and began applying it to your face with light strokes.

He watched you in admiration with a soft smile, "god you're gorgeous darling" he quietly his thoughts out loud again this time in a whisper. You looked up at him in the mirror and met his gaze, a shy smile creeping up, "you're so sweet" he gently cupped the side of your face and placed a kiss on your forehead from above, "I'll see you after school, yeah?" You nodded and gave him one more peck on the lips, "of course." He walked back to the door, "okay, I love you." You smiled, "I love you too."

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You were on your way to class with Bridget and Charlotte, the two telling you about how much they think you'd enjoy the date and that you had nothing to be afraid of when Uliana had come up to you guys, purposely bumping into Bridget as she harshly shoved her causing her to fall, "oops, sorry! Didn't see you there." She giggled evilly. "Hey watch it inky!" You immediately stood up for your pink haired friend while Charlotte helped her up. The VK's all stopped and turned back to you, you looked over at your boyfriend who had a dreaded look on his face, "excuse me?" Uliana stepped closer, Bridget and Charlotte taking a step back behind you in fear, you sighed in annoyance, "I said to watch where you're going." Bridget hiding closer behind you with a squeak while peaking over your shoulder. Uliana glanced at her friends and let out a laugh, "I'm sorry, princess. It's not my fault she's so invisible." She stated, Morgie, Maleficent and Hades looking at you with the same hatred in their eyes as her while Hook was simply watching in silence. "Says the one who has to wear platform boots to not look like a seven year old that I personally find to be a bit tacky." Hook and Charlotte stifled a laugh from escaping their mouths at the insult as you continued, "If you would like some fashion advice, I'd be happy to help" you smiled a painfully fake smile, Uliana stepped closer stopping just inches from your face, the rest of them following, "you keep talking and you'll regret it, so I suggest you watch your mouth and get to class." She hissed, you crossed your arms and stood up straighter, "oh yeah? And what if I don't?" There was a worried look on Hooks face as he was ready to intervene but as Uliana was about to reply she was cut off by the bell causing him and your friends to sigh in relief. You gave her and the group one last smile, "maybe next time. See ya" you shrugged before pushing Bridget and Charlotte away from the group who were still standing in the same spot watching as you strolled down the hall untouched, winking at your boyfriend before turning around.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Lunch had finally come around and you were on your way to the courtyard where your date was going to be when you were pulled into a dark, empty classroom causing you to squeal. Your mouth was then covered when you were placed up against the wall out of sight. It was Hook who had an unreadable expression on his face, he slowly took his hand off your mouth and you instantly started talking, "what are you doing?!" You whisper yelled, he shushed you as he peeked around the door waiting for the last bit of people to disappear into the cafeteria. You crossed your arms impatiently as he finally turned to you, "why did you have to go and choose a fight with Uli?!" He began, you let out a breathless scoff, "what the hell do you mean by "choose a fight"? She was the one who started it! I was only standing up for B." He sighed, "yeah? Well now she's been non stop talking about you about how she wants to quite literally kill you." You raised your eyebrows, "her words, not mine." He corrected. You shrugged unbothered, "if it means she's gonna stop bothering Bridget, I'm fine with that." He shook his head, "love, I just want you to be careful. You know how much of a bitch she can be, and she has no limits whatsoever. So please, I'm just looking out for you." You took in his words, sighing and nodding and stopped when you heard Bridget and Charlotte talking in the hallway, "where is she? She said she'd be here." You made eye contact with him while you listened to their conversation, "do you think she bailed?" The other sighed, "I wouldn't put it past her." After hearing that, without thinking, you instantly walked out of the classroom and into the hall, you saw the worried expressions wash away as they relaxed, "oh thank goodness you're here. Uh, what were you doing with him?" You tilted your head in confusion and turned to see Hook who seemed to have walked out right after you, you looked back at them, "was he picking on you?" Bridget asked, the worried expression found its way back to her face. You nodded, "yeah, it was just a bunch of empty threats though. I'm fine." You said simply, "y/n, you should be more carefu-" she cut herself off, "you know what never mind, you have a date to get to!" The two started pulling you towards the courtyard, "it's all set up, you're gonna love it!" They explained.

When you entered the courtyard, you saw people scattered around the area, talking and going about their daily lives as always. You then spotted a table with a little cloth over it and a picnic basket and candle on top. You found it cute that your friends did all this just for you. You then looked at the guy sitting there and instantly recognized him as one of the defenders on the tourney team. You took a deep shaky breath, all the guys on the team were assholes and tools. But you decided to trust their better judgement and walked over to him. He looked up at you and stood up, "hey, I'm Daniel." He stuck his hand out to greet you, you smiled, "y/n. Nice to meet you." The two of you sat down, "so how'd B and Charlotte convince you to do this?" You laughed, he smiled, "they didn't have to, they just told me there would be free food and I couldn't turn that down." You both laughed. So far so good.

Hook observed from afar, leaning up against a tree, jealousy and anger bubbled within as he watched as you forced a laugh out while the guy talked. He didn't like how the guy didn't let you talk or how obnoxious he was. Though it wasn't a real date, or so you claimed, he still hated to see someone treat you so poorly. He could see the forced smile on your face, trying your best to act interested in what he was saying. Hook knew you better than anyone, including your own sister, so he knew you were bored and wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. "Hey J, whatcha up to?" Morgie came up from behind him causing him to jump a little, Morgie followed his eye line and smiled, "nothing, just observing.." he said with a disgusted tone which was thankfully perceived as being disgusted by you and not jealousy. Morgie simply nodded, "well, Uli told me to come find you, she has a plan she wanted to share." Hook nodded, not taking his eyes off you, "okay, I'll..." he trailed off when he saw the guy stand up and gave you his hand to take and watched intently as he leaned in with you slowly backing away, "fuck that." he instantly ran up to you, yanking you away and pulling you into a kiss instead causing you to gasp. You pulled away, "what are you-" you stared into his eyes and immediately kissed him again laying your hands on his chest. His soft lips on yours as he pulled you closer, deepening the kiss. You heard audible gasps from Bridget and Charlotte and some whispering from others, Daniel was about to protest but understood what was happening and walked off. You broke the kiss and stared into his eyes, "I love you." You whispered while brushing his hair back that covered his face, he smiled, "I love you too."

"Y/n!" You jumped at the sound of Charlotte's angered voice and looked to the two, her face filled with confused frustration and Bridget beside her with a surprised look, "uh, yeah..?" You said nervously, "I can't believe this." You sighed, ready for the long rant on how it was unacceptable for you to be with a VK. "Look, I'm sorry but.." Charlotte shook her head, "I can't believe you didn't tell us!" Bridget's face lit up, "yeah! Oh my gosh! Y/n, I'm so proud of you!" She enveloped you in a strong warm hug as she spun you around. “How long have you been together?” You chuckled nervously, “uh, about six months” the two girls jaws dropped in shock. After a few moments Bridget spoke up, "now that I think of it, it was so obvious I'm surprised we never put the pieces together!" You frowned, "what do you mean, obvious?" She crossed her arms with a grin, "well, he never picked on you like ever. He only ever listened to you when you would tell them to stop picking on us and today, he had a cute concerned look on his face when you stood up for me!" She thought about it and she lowered her voice, "oh my gosh... were you guys... in the classroom?!" You both shook your heads violently, "no, no, no. We weren't. I swear!" You defended. She looked over at Hook and back over at you, "okay, but does he treat you, you know? Good?" You smiled and looked over at him, "yes, he's a sweetheart actually" Bridget tilted her head in adoration of you two. "really? He's a sweetheart?" Charlotte spoke up in a surprised tone while pointing and looking him up and down, him returning the look to her, "yes, I know. Shocking." You snorted causing him to roll his eyes and the girls giggle. You looked behind the girls and met eyes with Morgie who was with the rest of the VKs who were looking at you with a glare, then the thought hit you. You turned to James, "oh... what about your friends?" He followed to where you were looking and sighed, "I'll deal with them later. I'm just happy we can finally stop hiding." You both smiled at each other lovingly and he gave you a light kiss on the forehead. "Me too."

Charlotte and Bridget being able to see you be in love made them feel like proud parents, ecstatic about the fact that their sister and best friend had possibly found her happily ever after.

[cinemastyles-blog]

Summary: Y/N gets invited onto The Late Late Show with James Corden and does a game of Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts with Harry.

I feel like this is a long beginning but just go with it because I promise it gets F I L T H Y.

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, praise kink, squirting, oral, fingering, unprotected sex, biting, F I L T H and some fluff

Master List

∘₊✧── 𝑒𝓃𝒿𝑜𝓎 ──✧₊∘

"As you all know, we have the wonderful and talented Mr. Harry Styles here with us tonight!" James reintroduces his guests and the audience claps and cheers, especially for Harry.

"Y/N. Are you ready?" One of the crew asks. I nod, "Oh, yes." She nods and gives a thumbs up to some people.

This is going to be so fun. I've known James for years and everyone knows that Harry and I are friends, but what they really don't know is that we're actually together.

We agreed to keep our relationship as private as we could, for now. I’m honesty surprised we have been able to, It's more intimate for us that way, but Harry has been acting.. weird? I don’t know. He’s asking if I’d ever want to go public and I’m not really opposed to it.

But anyway, I've asked James to keep it a secret that I'm coming on the show, so I've been labeled as the surprise guest for weeks now, so Harry is going to be put on the spot, and we're going to have to pretend that we're strictly 'just friends'.

"As you all know, I like to play a little game.." The crowd starts to cheer, "What? I haven't even told you the game yet!" James laughs, "We'll, since you all know what I'm about to say next, Harry." He motions for him to get to come over to him.

Harry gets up and pulls his suit jacket down as he walks over to him, "Yes, James." He lays an arm around his shoulder. James looks at him with a smile and starts to laugh, "Are you ready to either spill your guts or fill your guts?"

Harry covers his face and laughs, "Oh god. I knew it."

James laughs and motions to the table, "Why don't you go and have a seat over there, but don't touch anything!" Harry walks over to the table and has a seat.

"Now, Harry. You know how this game works correct?" James walks over and sits down across from Harry.

"The title is uh, pretty explanatory, James." Harry chuckles.

"Right, right. Of course it is." James rolls his eyes exaggeratedly and reads his cards, "Oh wait. One more thing before we get started."

"Okay." Harry nods.

"I won't be doing this challenge with you." James stands up and laughs, "Everybody, if you would please give a wonderful round of applause for the very talented and very beautiful Y/N Y/L/N!"

James claps and turns to welcome me onto the stage.

I walk out smiling as I wave my hands to the crowd. I walk over to give James a hug, "Hello, hello." He kisses my cheek, "Hello there, love. How are you?"

I nod, "I'm good, how are you?" He smiles, "I'm great. You look amazing by the way." I smile and wave to the crowd again.

Harry looks at James, "Now I see why you wouldn't tell me who the surprise guest was." He smiles and shakes his head.

I smile and walk over to greet Harry, keeping it very professional. He kisses my cheek, "Hello, darling." I walk around to take my seat and Harry gets up and helps me push my chair in.

"What a gentleman, yeah?" James motions towards Harry. Harry bats the air and pretends to be shy.

That man is not shy around me, let me tell you.

"Okay." I look down at the table and make a face, "Harry? You want to go first?" He shakes his head quickly while smiling, "No, all you."

I roll my eyes, "Fine." I bite my lip and tap my fingers on the table, anticipating Harry's first question for me.

"Y/N."

"Harry."

"On your phone.." he smirks and the crowd "oohs", "Calm down, I didn't even ask the question yet." He laughs and looks at me, "On your phone, what is the last thing you google searched?"

He leans back in his seat and watches me as I think.

I shake my head, "I don't.. I don't know."

Then it hits me, "Oh. Oh no. I can't- nope. It's embarrassing, we'll not.. no." I laugh and can feel my cheeks getting red.

"Y/N? Is it that bad?" James asks leaning in. I shake my head, "Not really.. just like.. personal?" I shrug, "Oh god that's not-" I look down at the glass in front of me, "What the hell is this James?"

Harry wags his finger at me, "Naughty, naughty." I roll my eyes and look at James, "Y/N.. that is blended up fish with plain yogurt."

I gag and shake my head, "I was-" I laugh and cover my face, I lean back and hold my arms out, "Vibrators. I was looking up vibrators. A girl has needs, people."

The crowd cheers for me as I look over at Harry and his brow cocks up as he smirks.

He clears his throat and looks up, "Definitely didn't expect that." He laughs, "Go." He nods towards me and I shake my head with a smile, "hmm."

"Y/N, what are you going to ask Harry?" James asks walking over and sitting down.

"Are there any songs on any of your albums that are about me?" I rest my elbows on the table, knowing damn well there is because he told me himself.

The crowd '0ohs' again and Harry shakes his head laughing, "Yeah, actually there's track.." he mumbles into his napkin, "On the-" he mumbles into his napkin again, "Album."

He shakes his head and tucks the fabric into his shirt. I laugh and clap my hands together, "You don't have to eat that. You can just tell us."

He looks up at me, to the crowd, at James then back at me, "Bull Penis.. sounds.. delightful." Harry shakes his head, "Can I just tell you one?"

I look at James and he looks at Harry shocked, "So there's more than one?"

Harry cuts a piece of the disgusting food off and locks eyes with me as he pulls it off with his teeth, "That's disgusting." He says leaning over to spit it into the garbage can.

He takes the napkin and wipes off his mouth, tongue and teeth. The crowd absolutely loses it with laughter. Harry turns to the crowd, "It's really not that complicated to figure out." He laughs.

I shrug, "Wow. Looks like I'll have to give your albums another listen." I smile and shake my head, "I'm nervous for the next one."

He laughs and nods towards me, "Rank my Movies." I lean my head back, "Damn it, Harry." I shake my head and spin the table, slowly looking at my options, "My policeman, Don't Worry Darling, and Dunkirk."

James scoffs and laughs, "My god that was fast."

Harry nods, "I honestly didn't expect you to answer." He laughs and claps for me, "Thank you."

I shrug, "I'm not eating bird saliva, sorry."

"Okay, y/n, you get the final question and Harry, you get the final spill or fill." James taps the table, "Let's do this. Drum roll please..”

The crowd drums their legs and I smirk slightly.

"Is it true, Mr. Styles." I lean forward a bit, "About what the magazines say?”

He leans in, “What do they say exactly?”

“That there's a possible future Mrs. Styles floating around with you?”

Harry's smirk turns into a slow smile as he quickly picks up on what I'm asking. He gives me a look and I nod and smile, "Go on. Tell us or enjoy those delicious-" I lean over and pick up the the card, "grasshoppers in ghost pepper sauce."

He look at the crowd and looks over at James, "I will say.." he picks up the napkin, "You know.." he laughs and shakes his head, "These grasshoppers don't look half bad."

I hide my smile behind my hands and watch as he teases everyone.

"So Harry." James says, "Is it spill or fill?"

Harry stares at the plate and then his eyes glance up at me. I nod once and my heart starts pounding.

"Spill."

The crowd goes absolutely insane and James leans in, placing a hand on his shoulder, "Alright, alright, alright." He waves his hand to get the crowd to quiet down.

I look over at the crowd and lean back in my seat, "Spill your guts, Styles." I smirk, "We're all dying to know."

He sighs, "I've had a girlfriend for four, going on five years now." James mouth drops and he looks over at me, "What?"

I laugh and shrug.

The crowd loses it again and Harry laughs and shakes his head, "You'll know who she is soon enough and that's all I'm giving you!" Harry stands up and throws the napkin down, “That’s all I’m giving you.” He walks away and turns around laughing.

God I love his laugh and smile.

I’m so in love with this man, it’s insane.

"Wow." James covers his mouth, "What on earth, y/n. You just got Harry to-" he stands up and walks over to him, "Come on, you have to tell us one thing. Do we know her?"

He smiles and nods, "Mhm."

"Wow. Unbelievable! There you have it ladies and gentleman. Mr. Harry styles and Y/N Y/L/N!"

I walk over and stand on the other side of James. I smile and wave to the crowd when they suddenly gasp and start screaming.

"What's going on?" I look at James and he quickly turns around and gasps with a smile, "Oh my god."

I turn around to see Harry down on one knee. I cover my mouth and my eyes instantly well up with tears, "Harry."

"It's y/n!?" James yells, "Oh. my. god." He gets the crowd to quiet down and he holds his card over his mouth, tears welling up in his eyes now, too.

I look back down at Harry and he smiles, "Y/N, you stuck by me these past, almost five years and I am forever grateful for you. You kept me going and stayed with me through the highs and lows of making music. I want you to be the one who continues to do that for me in ever single thing for the rest of my life. Will you please, do me the honor in marrying me?"

I don't even have to think about my answer, "Yes. Yes. Yes!" He hugs me as he stands up, lifting me off the ground. He spins me around and sets me down, immediately taking my hand to slide the ring on.

"What did we just witness here today? Magic. Absolute magic!" James hugs us both and congratulates us.

"What a way to end the show. They really had us going there for a while, didn't they?" He claps and thanks the crowd, "Goodnight!"

We walk backstage and I look up at Harry, "I had no idea you were going to do this, I thought we just talked about confirming that we were dating."

"We just did." He leans down and kisses me, "Now if you don't mind. I want to take my new fiancée and fuck her in my dressing room."

My cheeks get hot as Harry lays a hand on my back.

James stops us and congratulates us again.

"Thanks, mate." Harry pats his shoulder, "We're off to celebrate."

"Don't break anything please." James laughs with a sigh as we practically run into Harry’s dressing room.

He shuts and locks the door, peeling my dress from my body. He shrugs off his plaid jacket and starts to unbutton his shirt, "You just got so much sexier, Mrs. Styles."

He throws his shirt down and pushes his body against mine. His lips attack my lips before they quickly move down my neck.

He lifts me up and takes me over to the couch, setting me down and getting on his knees between mine.

He leans up and kisses down my chest. His hands kneading my boobs. I moan as he sucks and leaves a little trail of bite marks down to where he takes one of my nipple into his mouth.

I moan and arch my back as he holds it between his teeth and flicks it with his tongue.

"Harry." I moan tangling my fingers in his hair. He switches and does the same to my other boob, only this time he takes a hand and slides it down to my pussy.

His fingers slide up and down my slit teasingly.

"You're so fucking wet, baby. Fuck." He groans kissing and leaning another trail of bite marks down my stomach.

He slips two fingers in and I gasp, pulling his hair tighter. He moan as my action and kisses down my one thigh.

His fingers move in and out and I can hear how wet I am.

"You hear that baby? You hear how soaked you are for me?" He looks up at me and I look down at him, nodding as my eyes roll back, "Ye- yes, baby." I grip the couch and arch my back.

"I'm going to devour you. You're so fucking- Mm." He groans and dives in, licking and sucking my clit as he fucks me with his gorgeous hands.

I moan loudly and struggle to keep it together.

I can feel the pressure. I can feel myself getting ready to cum.

He quickly slips in another finger and curls them upward as he thrust them in and out.

I brings my arm up by my head and dig my nails into the back of the couch, "oh fuck!"

"That was fucking hot, sweetheart." He pulls out and lifts his hand up, liquid drips off and onto the floor. I smile shyly and shake my head.

"Don't be shy baby. You squirted all over me. I love when you do that to me." He smiles and goes right back to eating me out.

His tongue fucks my pussy. His nose rubs against my clit. His fingers squeeze my thighs. He sends me into absolute bliss, "H-ha-" I arch my back and my legs shake against his body.

He continues to eat me out until I'm panting.

"You taste so fucking good. Fuck. I can't get enough of my fiancée and her delicious fucking pussy." He goes back down and the pleasuring sensation makes my mind go blank.

All I can do is moan.

He pulls away and come up, his lips wet with my slick. He kisses me and I wrap an arm around his neck.

"Did that feel good, baby?" He kisses down my neck slowly, "Are you okay?" I nod and smile, "That was amazing."

He smile and kisses back up to my lips, "Want to continue?"

"Please." I whimper, "I need you."

He stands up and take the rest of his clothes off, gently positioning me on the couch, "You're so beautiful when you're fucked."

I smile and bite my lip as he pushes my leg up slowly, "You're so fucking-" He moans as he slips the head of his cock in, "Fucking amazing."

He pushes the rest of the way in, moaning as his hips hit my body. He reaches down and grabs my chin, his thumb running over my lips before I open and take his thumb in my mouth.

I grab his wrist and suck while I keep my eyes on his.

He starts to thrusts and my eyes flutter shut. My lips part as I let out a loud moan. He groans and slides his hand down to my throat.

My boobs bounce with each of his thrusts and I whimper as his hand tightens around my neck, "I love you so- fucking.. much." He leans down and kisses me, his hand still around my neck.

I moan quietly into his mouth and grab his hair, pulling as I feel myself about to cum again. I don't even had to say anything for Harry to know.

"Cum again baby, I know you can do it." He whispers into my ear, "I want to feel you cum as I fuck that tight little cunt of yours."

I moan and arch my back, "f-fuck." I whimper pulling his hair harder.

He moans and slips and arm under my back, holding me to him as he continues fucking me. I cling to him as much as I can, clenching around his cock as I cum again.

"Fuck, I want to cum so bad." He moans, "I-I." He lets out a loud moan and buries his face into my neck, "Fuck, y/n. You feel so, so good."

He continues to praise me, "You're taking me so, so well, baby."

"You feel so good around my cock."

"I love it when you cum for me."

I dig my nails into his back and practically scream out his name.

"That's it baby, let the studio know that you feel good."

He groans as I drag my nails up his back, "Fuck."

His thrusts get sloppy and he pushes as deep inside of me as he can go, "Fuck, fuck, fuck." He pants, "Y/N?" He asks brushing hair out of my face.

"I'm still here." I smile and look at him. My eyes are heavy and my brain feels fuzzy. "You fucked me good, baby." I lay a hand on his cheek as he kisses me, “I love you so much.”

He smiles and kisses my forehead as he slowly pulls out. I wince slightly as he lays my leg down, "Sorry."

I shake my head, "No. no. That's a good kind of pain." He smirks slightly and kisses my hip, "We’ll go home and I'll run you a bath, give you some time to recover before we celebrate again." He winks.

I shake my head, "I'm giving you a blow job in the car on the way home."

He smirks and nods, "Fair enough."

——

Requests are accepted! Send me a message!

Part 2?

[hoomandoescosplay]

Rivals To Lovers | Regulus Black x Reader Oneshot

The air around us is thick with anticipation for the game. As my teammates and I are getting ready we chatter excitedly about the game. Games against Slytherin are always enjoyable since both teams always get fueled with competitive rivalry.

I feel a strong pat on my back and look up to see James grinning at me. “Kick Black’s ass for all of us, got it?” I grin back at him. James is always the one who is pumping us all up before matches, and it works wonders for our morale.

He always makes sure we are fully prepared for our opponents regardless of the house we’re facing. I nod my head vigorously as I get more excited. Regulus and I have always been known to get on each other's nerves especially when it comes to us both fighting for the Snitch.

Some of the others cheer at James’s words and I can’t help but laugh. I absolutely adore everyone on the team and how supportive they all are. I put on my last bit of gear as Marlene walks up to me.

She gives me a wink and pats me on the back. "You ready to kick some ass?" A grin forms on her face, clearly excited for the game about to start.

“You know it.” I grin back at her. Marlene gives a loud cheer causing our other teammates to look in our direction. I see Sirius snicker from across the room as James rounds us up into a circle.

He gives us all one last pep talk before ushering us out onto the field. We all exit the locker rooms and line up, our brooms in our hands. We face the other team as they mirror us. The sky is clear, no sign of rain. Our last match against Slytherin was horrid with how bad the rain was coming down.

The crowd is going wild already, the stands packed with people. Regulus and I make eye contact as he finds his place in front of me. The air between us has the usual charge of tension as we look at each other.

I can see the competitive fire in his eyes and it's clear he wants nothing more than to win. He gives me a slight nod, his face stoic as ever. I nod back at him in return before getting my broom in the proper position. I can tell this will be a fun game. Our eyes break away for each other as we see the referee getting ready to throw the Quaffle into the air.

“Hope you prepared to lose this match Black.” I say with a smirk as the Quaffle goes up and all of the players immediately get on their brooms and begin to fly in the stadium.

I watch the Quaffle get hit back and forth as my eyes scan for any sight of the Snitch. The cheers fluctuate in volume anytime one of the teams is close to getting a point but I do my best to block it out.

My mind was so focused on finding the Snitch that I didn’t even realize someone was next to me at first. I jump at the sound of Regulus' voice. “See anything yet.”

I turn my head to look at him. “Do you honestly think I’d give you an answer to that question?” He smirks at my response, making me glare at him slightly.

“It seems as though (Y/N) and Regulus are starting their little feud a bit early in the match today.” Remus says from the announcer stand, catching my attention.

I have to hold back a smile. Comments like that usually get on my nerves cause it puts more attention on Regulus and I but for once it was helpful.

“Nice chat but I’ll be going now, Black.” I say before zooming off to trail the Snitch. Thank you Remus for helping me find it. I chuckle slightly as I hear him curse under his breath.

Regulus is very competitive. Almost as much as I am which makes these games even more enjoyable. The seekers on the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff teams are good but Regulus is the closest to my skill level. He makes me actually want to put effort into winning.

I can feel him gaining on me making me speed up a bit more, my eyes never leaving the Snitch. The air around us nearly hums with our energy as we weave through the other players.

A small gasp comes out of my mouth as I stop my broom short. I blink rapidly as the Quaffle just barely misses me. I scan the area to see one of the Slytherin beater’s snickers.

All of the Gryffindors watching the match begin to boo, causing the Slytherin side to get even more riled up. I hear James call out to me from his position but I can’t hear him over all of the noise. “What?” I say, my own voice getting drowned out. He repeats himself as I read his lips. “You alright?” I nod my head and give him a thumbs up.

Regulus fly’s up next to me again. As I glance at him I can tell he’s extremely pissed off. "That was on purpose." He says as his jaw clenches slightly. "That bastard was deliberately aiming for you."

I let out a small sigh. “Don’t go all protective mode on me right now. We’re in the middle of a match.” His scowl deepens at my words. "You almost got hit by a quaffle." He says, his voice low and dark. "Forgive me for being upset about."

“Can you be upset about it later? It’s going to look out of character right now.” I lower my voice as well. “I’m fine. I'm not hurt. That’s all that matters.”

His mind is racing making it hard for me to keep a neutral look on my face. I love how protective he is when it comes to me but I would rather avoid others noticing it right now.

“Another point for Gryffindor. Guess Slytherin can’t keep up with us today.” A small smack sound emits from the announcer stand as Remus gets hit on the back of the head slightly by McGonagall.

I take a moment to look up at the announcer stand and I see Remus rub the back of his head while McGonagall looks at him in disapproval. I let out a silent chuckle, shaking my head at the sight.

“You sure you’re fine?” Regulus’s voice gets my attention again as I nod. “I’m fine I promise.” He continues to look at me for a moment, a flicker of worry and protectiveness flashing on his face before disappearing.

I see his eyes dart from mine and I immediately pick up on why. I spin my head around as I see the Snitch as well. It's right there, in both of our sights. I watch it flutter near the stands and take off, my body pushing me forward. I feel all of my focus hone in on the Snitch.

Regulus and I are side by side as we chase the Snitch. Anytime one of us gains a bit of space the other catches up quickly after. The Snitch makes many fast turns and drives but that only makes us increase our speed.

Adrenaline pumps into my body, making my muscles tense. I've never had such a close chase for the Snitch before. I can see him from the corner of my eye, his face a mix of concentration and determination.

My fingers tighten their grip about my broom as I lean further down to increase my speed. I see him copy my movements making me grumble slightly. “Copycat much?”

"I need to catch the Snitch somehow," He replies, his voice slightly strained. "Not my fault you have some good techniques." I continue to follow you closely, my eyes glued to the Snitch as I process his words.

“Didn’t expect to get a compliment from you on the field.” I tease as I reach my hand out to try and grab the Snitch. He just rolls his eyes before reaching his own hand out.

Each time one of us tries to grab the Snitch, the other is right there too. We're so closely matched that it's almost irritating me. “Come on.” I mumble under my breath as I stretch my arm out even further.

Again he copies my movements, the Snitch grazing his fingertips making me slightly panic. There is no way I’m going to let him win. I won’t let Slytherin win.

An idea pops in my head. I’ve never actually attempted this trick outside of practice, and definitely never at a speed like this. The Han around my broomstick clenches as I debate if it’s worth trying.

A small growl comes out of Regulus as he tries to grasp the Snitch again. I make up my mind and start to shift my position slightly on my broom. Please don’t fall off. I repeat in my mind as I steady myself while beginning to stand.

Regulus notices my shift and immediately slows his broom down slightly. “What are you doing?” He asks with an alarmed tone. I keep my eyes on the Snitch as I answer him. “Winning.”

"By attempting something that is incredibly dangerous and could result in you falling off your broom?" He says, his voice laced with irritation and concern.

“Exactly what I’m doing.” I nod my head in confirmation. He watches in horror as I rise onto my broom and start to walk towards the end. "Do not do—" Regulus starts to say, but cuts himself off as he sees me grab the Snitch. "Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me."

My eyes light up as my hand grabs a hold of the snitch. That little bit of extra length was all I needed. I cheer loudly and raise the Snitch up in my hand before wobbling slightly.

I readjust myself to sit on my broom properly before continuing to celebrate. “Hah I won this time.” I say with a grin as I hold it out in front of Regulus’s face.

"I can see that." He grumbled, his expression turning into a full-on scowl. Despite his irritation at my victory, I can tell he has a small rush of pride at my ability to win like that. "You're bloody insane, you know that?"

The Gryffindor section cheers loudly as the Slytherins sulk slightly at the outcome. We both begin to fly down to the center of the field where we started as I reply back. “I know. But you love this side of me.”

He let out a huff of irritation, but can’t help the subtle upturn at the corner of his mouth at my words. “You’re ridiculous,” He finally responds while shaking his head, but there is a lack of annoyance in his words.

As we land we both dismount our brooms. I immediately get swept up by my teammates as Sirius and James lift me up on their shoulders, cheering with the rest of our team.

I see Regulus roll his eyes as James and Sirius parade me around the field. It wouldn't be a proper Gryffindor victory if they didn't parade me around. I can’t help but laugh out loud at their antics. After they get tired of carrying me around they place me back down on the grass and each of our teammates gives me a pat on the back.

My eyes roam to Regulus every now and then as he watches from the sidelines. As Marlene pulls me into a side hug one of Regulus’s teammates pulls him towards their respective team room to change and leave the field.

“We’re going to have the best party tonight in the common room.” Sirius grins at me as we all begin to head to our own designated room to change as well.

─── ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ ───

I yawn slightly as I sit outside of the Slytherin common room. I expected someone to come out of the entrance by now. I usually don’t have to wait this long to sneak inside. Regulus and I should really pick times for when we meet at each other’s common rooms.

My eyes begin to close as I lean my head against a pillar. I hear faint footsteps but ignore them, keeping my eyes closed. I then hear a snicker making me open my eyes. “Having fun down there love?” Regulus asks with a smirk on his face.

“Did you have me wait out here as payback for winning?” I playfully whined before reaching my hands out indirectly asking him to pull me up.

He chuckles softly, taking my hands in his and pulling me up to my feet. "Maybe a little bit." His eyes roam over me for a moment, taking in my appearance. "You look tired."

“I’m exhausted.” I say as I wrap my hands around his waist and lean my head against his chest. Regulus wraps his arms around me as his hands run soothing circles on my back.

“You’re probably exhausted from that ridiculous stunt you pulled to win.” He teases. I look up at him and puff my cheeks out. “No, I've been practicing that for a while. I’m tired cause your brother and James throw insane parties. Gryffindor parties are not for the weak.”

Regulus let out a bark of laughter, his hands drifting to my hips. “Yeah well, that tends to happen when James and Sirius are involved.” I start to laugh, leaning my head back on his chest.

Regulus pulls me closer against his body. "You were impressive today though. Don't think I didn't notice how good you are out there on the field." A smile forms on my lips as I look up at him.

Without saying anything my hands go up to his face as I pull him towards me, kissing him gently. A small hum emits in his throat as my lips meet his.

His hands grip my hips a little tighter, holding me against him as our kiss deepens. A moment later he breaks away from the kiss, our eyes locking on one another. “You were pretty good out there too.” I return the compliment as my smile grows.

“Of course I was.” He says with a smirk, leaning down to brush his nose against mine. “Not that you can blame me for being distracted when I had such a good view the whole time.”

I laugh again from his comment. “Alright, sure. We'll go with that as the reason you lost.” Regulus rolls his eyes at your response but there's no irritation behind them.

He leans his forehead against mine as I move my hands to rest on his shoulders. "You're lucky I love you." I hum lowly. “I love you too.”

[scapingthebottomofthebarrel]

It took 30 years, but here it is! The Remus fic!!

Told You So

“He’s just a boy! He won’t eat you!” Lily giggles while forcibly dragging you down the platform. Lily has been insisting since the two of you met at the beginning of third year that you and Remus would really hit it off, but new people are scary and the Marauders have quite the reputation. So here you are at the beginning of your sixth year being pulled down the platform to what you know will surely be your end.

“It’s not him I’m worried about! No one could be scared of him, he's too soft!” You grunt trying to dig your heels into the ground further. “I’m so bad with words. And he’s really tall!” Lily stops and looks at you like you’ve grown a second head

“Well Remus is excellent with them so it will balance out and I have no clue what his height has to do with this” She says and continues to look for Remus

“Tall is intimidating and I’ll die Lily.” You whine

“You were partnered with Severus for potions last year, Remus will be a walk in the park.”

“Those are two VERY different situations” You defended.

“Well I already told Remus I’d finally introduce the two of you. You wouldn’t make me a liar would you? Oh look there he is.” She chirps, waving him over before you can say anything.

“Tall” “Pretty” you and Remus say at the same time once he’s in front of you. Remus gives you a dopy smile and a little wave as you give what could only be described as a grimace. Your friends have lovingly told you you have zero poker face and your discomfort makes itself known and while you don’t doubt the kindness of the Marauders, your inability to coherently speak to new people has prevented you from meeting the only one Lily has deemed acceptable.

“I’ll take my leave before Potter is able to make his way over. Don’t forget to breathe, he’s too soft to be scared of remember?” She whispers the last part to you before making her way to where the rest of her friends are. You notice Remus taking a deep breath out of the corner of your eye as you try to summon any inner strength you can find and talk to someone new.

“I’m gonna marry you someday.” Remus says with a big smile as he holds out a hand for you to shake. Your eyes nearly pop out of your head at this. “That was supposed to be I’m Remus nice to meet you” he groans looking absolutely mortified with himself.

“Straight to the point we love that for you Moony! Keep on manifesting!” Sirius says as he comes up behind Remus and claps him on the back. James and Peter look about ready to pee themselves they’re laughing so hard. The arrival of the other three only serves to increase your anxiety.

“I’m I uhhh I mean w-well I-I umm you’re literate!” You nearly shout shoving the book you had been holding into his chest causing him to stumble back a step. You quickly turn around and run away to find a compartment and write a quick will before dropping off the face of the earth. “At least I gave him the book…” you mutter to yourself as you make your way through the crowed and onto the train. You really do want to make more friends and Lily had said how much he liked reading so you brought one of your favorite books as a way to start a conversation. Thankfully you have another copy of the book, so you won’t need that one back from him. You slump into a seat in the compartment Amos, Arthur, and Molly are in.

“We all saw that from the window” Amos cackles. You groan and bury your face in your hands.

“Leave her alone! It was so cute!” Molly squeals. “Wasn’t it so sweet Arthur?”

“Absolutely adorable.” Arthur says with a soft smile looking at Molly like she hung the stars.

“You couldn’t even hear what they said.” Amos points out. They all turn to you expectantly. “What did you say?”

“Molly, I leave you my nice tea kettle. Arthur, you get my muggle science books from primary school.” Is all you say finally sitting up as the train begins to pull out of the station.

“That’s fine I’ll can ask him myself. Worse case Sirius and Jame will have no problem telling me.” Amos says before quickly standing up and booking it out of the compartment and down the train in search of the Marauders. You look at Molly and Arthur for help.

“Like he ever listens to me.” Arthur says with a shake of his head.

“I don’t know what you think I could do.” Molly chuckles when you look at her. You let out a loud groan as you sink into your seat and contemplate the necessity of a magical education.

You don’t see Amos again until you are boarding the carriages to the castle and he yanks you backwards and unceremoniously tosses you into the carriage the Marauders are in as it begins to take off. You nervously look between the four boys in the carriage and your so called best friend. You will yourself to breathe and remind yourself that Amos is one of your best friends. He knows how nervous you can get with new people. He wouldn’t have put you in this position if he thought it would do you any harm. You take a deep breath and try to smile.

“Do you get motion sick?” Peter asks looking genuinely concerned. “You look like you’re gonna throw up.”

“I-I’m well I uhhh. No.” You squeak out.

“As your future in-laws, we told Amos we needed to meet you. We didn’t realize he would chuck you into the carriage like a sack of potatoes. Our deepest apologies.” Sirius said with a soft smile as he threw an arm around your shoulders

“Shut it Padfoot.” Remus hisses, kicking him in the shin.

“Oww! I’m just trying to be nice! You said to be nice! Didn’t he tell us to be nice? I thought that was so nice of me!” Sirius nearly shrieks looking to James and Peter for support.

“I thought it was nice.” Peter shrugs.

“Extremely nice. You know I’m often told how nice I am. And smart. Don’t forget handsome. Oh a-“ James says in what you assume he thinks in a nonchalant manner until he gets cut off by Sirius.

“We’re here to talk to our new sibling, not for you to indirectly woo Lily. Now where were we? Ah yes introductions. I’m Sirius, this is James, that’s Peter, and of course you know your future husband.” You’ve not looked at Remus yet, but as Sirius gives introductions your need to not be rude has you looking at Remus who looks like he’s about to explode.

“I am so sorry. We got off on the wrong foot and my friends all share a brain cell which clearly has been lost.” Remus says with a sigh before he gives you the softest smile and you feel like you’re going to melt.

“It’s fine.” You whisper. Maybe you could learn to deal with the Marauders if it meant Remus would smile at you like that again.

You focus on your breathing for the rest of the ride, willing your soul to not leave your body. The second the carriages reach the castle you are jumping out and stumbling towards your friends. “Bye!” Remus calls after you.

~~~~~~~~

During the welcome feast you sit as far away from the Marauders as possible. “How’d it go?” Lily asks excitedly as she sits down next to you across from Amos. You toss a roll at Amos when he lets out a chuckle. “So it was as bad as Sirius said?” She asks with a sigh as they both look at you expectantly.

“I don’t know what you all were expecting to happen! When have I ever been the one to initiate a friendship?” You nearly screeched. They all muttered agreements.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d be that startled. I really had good intentions.” Lily grabs your hand. Her eyes pleading with you to believe her. You sigh and give her hand a squeeze.

“I know. I really do want to be friends with him I just…” you sigh trailing off as you look over at Remus smiling dreamily. As if he had been waiting for this moment his eyes met yours almost immediately. “Co-could you umm maybe ask Remus if he’d like to possibly exchange letters? Maybe that can help me get more comfortable with him? Then I can, you know, talk to him. Maybe. If it goes well. And he doesn’t think I-”your rambling is cut off by Lily squealing excitedly.

“My baby is going to marry her soul mate!” Amos coos.

“Why do people keep saying things like that?” You groan slumping down in your seat.

“Because it’s true. I’ll go tell him right now about the letters.” Lily chirps quickly getting up and making her way over to Remus.

“Merlin have mercy on my soul…” you whisper, again, debating the necessity of a magical education.

~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Y/N,

I was over the moon when Lily told me you wanted to exchange letters. You don’t know how relieved I am that I didn’t scare you off. I’d like to apologize for how strong I came on. I promise I’m not normally like that. Ever. Lily has been telling me about you for so long and I’ve seen you around the castle so often, but I’ve never been able to get myself to go over and say ‘hello’. I hope that writing these letters will help me to be more open with you and not hide behind Sirius and James. So, how to begin? Here’s some need to know facts about me

Full name: Remus John Lupin

House: Gryffindor

Favorite food: Chocolate

Dream job: Professor

Bucket list item: Writing a book even if no one but me ever reads it

I can’t wait for your response

P.S. Thank you for the book. I haven’t read it before, but I’m excited to and hopefully we can talk about it

Sincerely,

Remus

You want to cry at how sweet Remus is. You’ve picked up and set your quill down at least 10 times trying to think of an adequate response. You take a deep breath and read Remus’s letter one more time before picking up your quill and beginning to write.

Dear Remus,

I must admit that I was rather startled by our first introduction, however it was really nice to know someone thought so highly of me. I also hope that these letters help me to be braver. I can’t imagine you hiding behind Sirius and James. From what I’ve soon of The Marauders around school it seems like they rely pretty heavily on you to be the brains of the operation and hide behind you when McGonagall is after you all. Here are some very important facts about me

Full name: Y/F/N

House: Y/H

Favorite food: Croissants

Dream Job: Baker

Bucket list item: Open my own bakery

P.S. I look forward to swapping notes

Sincerely,

Y/N

You don’t look at the letter again for fear of ripping it up and never sending anything. Instead you quickly pack up your things and rush from the library to the owlery.

“Where are off to in such a hurry?” Amos calls out to you seemingly appearing out of nowhere. You let out an inhuman shriek and nearly trip over your own feet, but he rushes forward just in time to help you keep your balance.

“Ooo off to send a love note to Lupin?” He asks while waggling his eye brows, noticing the letter in your hands. You make a displeased noise and straighten out your clothes. You look level him with a glare before making the decision to literally run away before you convince yourself to drop off the face of the earth. “You got this!” he yells after you. “We’re all rooting for you guys!” He adds even louder. You can’t help but smile a little bit at your best friends odd attempt at support.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Come on y/n. Just one?” Sirius pouts from his place on the counter.

“Sirius, you’ve had like five already.” You point out while reaching out to smack James hand away from the bowl of cookie dough you had set off to the side. It’s been six years since you had sent that first response and you’re currently in the kitchen of your and Remus’s shared apartment working on the desserts for a party Amos is throwing on Saturday .

“I’m your favorite brother and therefor deserve a cookie.” Sirius continues giving you his most charming smile.

“Nuh uh!” James shoutes. “Everyone knows I’m the favorite. My wife got you and your hubby together.” James sticks his tongue out at Sirius triumphantly.

“They’re not even engaged!” Sirius fires back.

“Oh, so now thats a technicality?” You ask, putting a hand on your hip. “Because if I remember correctly, you all introduced yourselves to me as my future inlaws.”

“Cause we are” James mumbles around a mouth full of brownie.

“If James gets one I get one!” Sirius shrieks shoving a fistfull of brownie into his mouth.

“No one was given anything!” You yell while trying to coral two six foot something toddlers out of your kitchen. They both start screaming to try and confuse you, but you’ve spent too much time around and living with Marauders to be thrown off by it. You start screaming too in an attempt to assert your dominance. Suddenly the lights go out and you all freeze.

“Did you all miss nap time or something?” You sigh in reliefs at the sound of your boyfriends voice.

“Remus can you please take them in the living room and play a board game or something? I really need to finish these desserts for Amos.”

“Ooo games!” James cheers before he and Sirius each grab a cookie and make their way to your living room. Remus shakes his head and smiles fondly after his friends.

“How was your day?” He asks as he sweeps you up into a hug.

“You should have seen them when Amos was here too earlier.” You say with a laugh remembering the sugar cube war that took place this morning. “How was the interview?” You can feel Remus shift nervously at your question. You hug him tighter and kiss his cheek. “I’m sure it went wonderfully. One of them will stick. I know it.”

“Yeah…I’m sure…”

“Remus we need enrichment!” Sirius sing songs from the living room.

“I just have to fill the macarons and bake the last cookies. I’ll join you guys when I finish.” You kiss his cheek and go back to the counter where your bowl of cookie dough sits.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You wake up the next morning to the sound of Remus humming to himself. “Morning.” You mumble as you stretch.

“Morning dear. I forgot I have an interview today in town. I’m going to run some errands after, but I’ll be back way before our date.” He says softly before leaning down and kissing your forehead.

“Knock ‘em dead.” You sleepily sigh nestling back into the bed. Remus convinced you to close the bakery today and spend the day together, so you have no where to be and a cozy bed calling your name.

When you do decide to get up you take your time getting ready. Remus has kept the date a complete secret. He just told you to wear something you like. With his vague directions in mind you get dressed and go eat a small breakfast knowing any date with Remus means yummy food.

“I’m home!” He calls out as he tumbls through the door and two and a half later. “Give me ten minutes!” He adds rushing past the kitchen and to your bedroom.

True to his word ten minutes later he’s walking back into the kitchen ready to go. “Walk by again!” You cheer causing his cheeks to flush, but he does as you say. “That’s my man!”

“Oh hush.” He mutters his cheeks getting even redder. “You know I could take you to court for false advertising. I thought I was getting a sweet soft spoken bean.” He tries to put on what you all call his ‘Professor Remus’ face, but you can see his smile peaking through.

“No way! You knew what you were signing up for and you love it! Now tell me where we’re going.” You smirk as you walk over to him and kiss his cheek.

“I hope you’re hungry.” He chirps as he grabs your hand and leads you out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“The book store?” You ask confused

“Surprise...” He squeaks out as he holds the door open for you. You shrug and head in smiling as you take in the large book store. You and Remus have spent an embarrassing amount of money and time here and yet you always find something new. “I’ll be right back.” He quickly mutters before walking to a different part of the store. You nod absentmindedly as you trail your finger along the spines of the books looking for something interesting.

After fifteen minutes you begin to look for Remus. You peak around isles but he’s nowhere to be found. You’re starting to think you’ve been abandoned when you find yourself speeding toward the ground. You had been looking up trying to see over the shelves as Remus is taller than most of them and failed to see him sat on the floor. “Are you ok?” He asks nervously looking you over for injuries.

“Why are you on the floor?” You ask with a giggle as you get situated across from him. He takes a deep breath and clears his throat before handing you a worn copy of your favorite book.

“Look what I found.” He says giving you a smile that makes you believe the Trojan war could have been started over one person, because you would fight an army to see that smile again. You smile back and begin to look through the book. As you flip through the pages a small envelope falls out. It has you name written on it in what you immediately recognize as Remus’ nice hand writing.

“What’s this?”

“You’re literate.” He says as he picks it up and hands it to you.

“Honestly, you get tounge tied once and your branded fo-“ you freeze as you finally get the paper out and read it. “Ma-maybe I’m not. Remus what does this paper say?” He just smiles at you with big hopeful eyes. “Remus…” is all you can get out as the tears start to fall. “Yeah. Yes. Of course. Of course I wanna marry you.” Your words come out jumbled as you look back and forth between the paper and Remus.

“Oh thank Merlin.” He sighs with relief. “If you’d said no Amos would have killed me. There was, well there was supposed to be a whole day leading up to this, but I got nervous I just kind of skipped to the end. Our friends are currently not very pleased with me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Amos’ party turned out to be an engagement party for you and Remus. It was a wonderful night full of friends, family, and love. After everyone else had left you, Remus, Lily, James, Sirius, and Amos sat around a fire talking about all the things that led you all to where you are now. “I can’t believe we’re god parents.” Sirius said raising his hand to you for a high five.

“I still can’t believe Amos and Jame are allowed to be in charge of a little humans.” You say with a smirk.

“Well I can’t believe Moony made us plan a proposal for weeks only to throw the whole plan out the window.” James teases.

“I was nervous!” Remus groans.

“As if they would have said no.” Lily says with a laugh.

“I am always right.” He concedes.

“No you’re not.” You say with a roll of your eyes.

“Yes I am. I told you on day one I’d marry you.” He looks at you the same way he did on the carriage ride that first day and you’re happy to let him have this.

“Yeah you did.” He leans in and kisses you softly as your friends cheer in the background.

“I’m gonna be the best godmother to baby Lupin.” Lily sighs happily causing you and Remus to break apart with nervous but excited smiles on your faces.

[carniferous]

i need the dil bartylus thesis NOOOOWWW

bartylus is the failmarriage of ALL time to me i’ve spoken about this before but to me they contrast jegulus in that jegulus is a relationship with clear beginnings and ends. its tumultuous for sure but its tumultuous in a very defined way. jegulus cant be a failmarriage bc they’d get divorced. they’re too obsessed with defining what they are to each other bc they want it to be real and meaningful and it can’t be anything less than that

bartylus on the other hand…. they couldn’t define what they are to each other if they tried. they’re like the definition of settling for less but ‘less’ in this case is someone who understands you on a very a deep and fundamental level. perhaps better than anyone in the world. perhaps better than you understand yourself!! i wouldn’t say they’re ‘recognition of self in the other’ bc barty and regulus aren’t even other to each other…. they are each others homes and i mean in this context that both of these characters have the most fraught relationship with their respective homes imaginable. they want each other the way they want to go home (not at all — but also desperately). their relationship is inextricable from childhood. they hate to be reminded of their childhoods

and yet they’re not…. toxic per se! they’re obviously not healthy but they love each other in a way that’s very earnest (childlike). barty dreams of running away with regulus. he is the white knight rescuing the princess from the tower (he’s exactly like james in this respect). but unlike james barty doesn’t see running away as leading to a potentially better life for them….. he has no desire for freedom or salvation. barty just wants to do what he thinks will make regulus happier. and bc of this they will NEVER run away together bc regulus does want freedom. he does want salvation. he will never leave everything he knows unless he has the promise of something better, and barty can’t give that to him (and barty would see dishonesty about that as the greatest betrayal imaginable). so they never leave! they’re trapped together forever! stagnation! rotting! being seen this clearly is love but it’s also unbearable! there’s no mystery there’s no intrigue there’s just the cold acceptance of their fate and the comfort that at least they’ll bear it together except it’s no comfort at all because they COULD have escaped. just not with each other

and don’t even get me STARTED on brotherhusband barty…. there are like some obvioussss barty/sirius parallels and we’d be fools to think regulus doesn’t see them. to think regulus doesn’t want barty explicitly because “this person is like my brother if my brother wanted me” ?? regulus is someone who has lived his entire life wanting to be wanted come on…. he fucks barty because barty is like if regulus could somehow make sirius stay. and barty thinks this is sooooo sweet he indulges it he’s like “yeah reggie why would i ever leave you we’ve known each other since we were toddlers… we’re practically bro—” and then 5 minutes later regulus is sucking his dick and he’s like. wow look at regulus self-soothing! i’m such a good friend :)

in a modern setting they’re a category 5 situationship of unprecedented magnitude. like the picture you paint of regulus crying in his car after their 34th screaming-match breakup of the MONTH (how does this even happen. months only have 31 days max. were they timing it by the hour) is so perfect. ppl tell reg to see a therapist and he graciously does and after explaining it the therapist is like “do you think this might have anything to do with your childhood?” and regulus like “no?” and then proceeds to ghost said therapist bc on the way home from the appointment barty called and apologized and invited regulus over. regulus was like “okay but we’re not going to fuck” and barty is like “ofc not do you think i’m some kind of freak that i would be horny right now—“ cut to barty with regulus’s calves on his shoulders

[zerokurokawa]

I absolutely love your writing so I'm back for more!

I really like the whole song prompt idea since I usually listen to music while scrolling through here so I wanna keep that going.

This one is gonna be based on I'd Rather Go Blind by Etta James (or by Beyoncé up to you)

Im think cheater!bonten!Ran x singer!reader, where reader has known for a long time about ran's cheating but decides to not leave him. Reader would eventually have to perform the song (the one above) infront of bonten. I feel like when Ran finally realizes the song is about him he would try his hardest to push through the rest of the performance, he's ofc infront of Mikey and the others so he would try to stay and act nonchalant but wouldn't be able to due to all the staring coming from Mikey. (I also feel like the entirety of bonten would see reader as a sweetheart who's just trying to make it through) I feel like they wouldn't be fazed by his cheating but more so surprised about him cheating on reader of all things yk?

Omg that's a lot but I truly believe you can bring it too life!

(also please feel better soon!!!)

I'd Rather Go Blind | Bonten!Ran x Reader (Cheating) </3

You were talented, exquisite, poise, and perfect all around. How could this have happened to you? Finding out through the great vine of people and connections you had that Ran, your long time boyfriend, had been fooling around on you was not supposed to be apart of your life's story. Being a club owner had its perks, you supposed as you thought about the copious amount of women he came across while partying and running the damn thing. 

You often performed at this very club. You sang like an angel sent down straight from heaven and Ran often paid you extra on the nights that you took over to perform. People from all over the city would come and see you and they knew you by name, asking if you were the that was going to be putting on a show tonight. You were practically famous in Roppongi. 

Yet here you were, begging yourself to get it together after reading the messages that were sent to you anonymously through text about Ran messing around. You had a show to put on tonight, everybody was going to be there as well. As you gathered yourself together and looked in the mirror, a small tear fell from your left eye and landed on your cheek. You dabbed it off with a napkin and whispered to yourself, "Showtime". 

______________________________________________________________

There, on stage in an elegant evening gown, you stood. Smiling and greeting everyone while the thoughts of him being with another woman ran through your mind. You had told the backstage crew already which song you were going to sing, and it was a ballad towards your lost love. 

The music began and you saw Ran sitting in the crowd, smile glistening at you as you were his pride and joy. Disgust came across your face, as you noticed he had not a single clue that you knew. 

Something told me it was over When I saw you and her talkin' Something deep down in my soul said, 'Cry, girl' When I saw you and that girl walkin' around...

You continued to sing, watching as Ran was starting to shift uncomfortably in his seat. His face remained nonchalant as you reached the chorus of the song. Mikey and Rindou, who were sitting next to him, noticed his behavior and began to stare, questioning his nervous antics. 

I would rather, I would rather go blind boy Than to see you walk away from me child, and all...

Ran would finally get the hint, the song was directed towards him as he saw the anger begin to spread across your face. The lyrics, the body language, everything... he knew that you knew. 

So you see, I love you so much That I don't want to watch you leave me baby Most of all, I just don't, I just don't want to be free no...

It was this verse alone that made Ran stand up to leave. He had enough of the guilt, the embarrassment. He knew that Mikey and the others knew. He knew that you normally only performed upbeat pop songs, yet, you had chosen a ballad of lost love to call him out on his bullshit. 

And baby, baby, I would rather, I would rather be blind boy Than to see you walk away, see you walk away from me, yeah Baby, baby, baby, I'd rather be blind now...

As you reached the end of the song, Ran was left standing at the corner of the club. By the door, he waited until the last line. Once he heard it, he slammed open the door and walked out, leaving you on stage with a large crowd cheering for you. You had conveyed the message of your broken heart.

______________________________________________________________

Ran had snuck up behind you in the back of the club in your dressing room. He had tears in hi eyes but strangely enough, a blank look on his face. 

"It's over, isn't it?" He finally spoke as you looked at him through your mirror. 

"I'm afraid it is, Ran." 

"Would you ever let me explain myself? Would you ever let me redeem myself?" He begged. 

You couldn't speak. You were at complete loss for words as he tried to wrap his arms around you. Three years were down the drain. 

"No..." You said quietly. He unwrapped his arms and stood back. You looked up, eyes watering and makeup starting to run. You looked so beautiful when you cried, like a weeping angel with the voice of a siren. 

"Please... Y/n..." He begged once more. 

"Leave, Ran." He did as you said, but not without turning around once more to look at you; taking in all of your beauty. 

(A/N: I'm feeling a lot better, hope you enjoy this! It broke my heart just to write it.)

[liyawritesss]

ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴀᴛ'ꜱ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ, ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ɪᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ʙʀᴇᴇᴢᴇ

Characters: MCU!Shuri Udaku x!Black!Fem!Reader

Type: Fic

Word Count: 11.8k

Synopsis: It’s your sister’s 25th birthday, and she invited you over for the extravagant birthday bash. However, there’s only one problem. Shuri has never met your family. She also isn’t aware of their past mistreatment of you. So when your parents begin to make jabs at you on what is supposed to be a joyous event, Shuri might have to apologize to your sister for what is to come next.

Warnings: cursing, mentions of verbal + physical abuse, mentions of severe anxiety, a very angry Shuri shuts shit down, shitty parents, dysfunctional family dynamics

A/N: So....this came about after watching a clip of Love & Hip Hop ATL, where in the clip one of the guys on the show was confronting his mother about the mistreatment and neglect he got as a kid and how his mother took all her frustrations out on him when he had nothing to do with what she was going through. That video touched exceptionally close to home so I wanted to writing for such an event but with Shuri, as I think for someone who is quite family oriented (or who appears to be), she would definitely have a few choice words to say to parents like that. Plus, I wanted to provide comfort to those going through similar situations as teenagers and young adults with their own parents. So I hope that this brings comfort to some of you, as it has done to me when writing it.

Song Suggestions: "Naked" & "Everything" by Ella Mai, "Let Me Down Slowly" by Alec Benjamin ft. Alessia Cara, "Let It Go" by James Bay, "Losin' Control" by Russ, "Control" by Zoe Wees, "You're Not Here" by Cynthia Erivo, "You Let Me Down" by Alessia Cara

Tags: @6-noir @playhousedistee @shuririsdefenseattorney @shuriszn @venusdraco @wrendermedone @writingintheshadowsforever @mbakuetshurisprincess @verachii @slytherin-34 @the_lesbian-fangirl @h34rtsformilli @strangefishflapturtle @cuddl3s4shur1 @shuriislut @dejaonline @babyboiboyega @badass-dora-milaje @inmyheadimobsessed @aaliyg @cafehyunji @chunkybabygorl @rosielovesfamily @lulu-network @nichole-224 @niyahwrites @lppriceisright @blacksapphhicmaddonna @pantherheart @marsfunzon22

Note: there are some of you that for some reason tumblr won't let me tag, so I apologize in advance.

Sign Up For My Taglist Here!

The closer you were to pulling up to your sister’s home, the harder it was becoming for you to breathe.

It wasn’t like you were ignorant enough to believe you could escape this.  You’d always known, deep down inside, that one day, you’d have to face them again. Yet, here you were, tucked into the smooth tan leather of Shuri’s car, hiding the fact that you were on the verge of an anxiety attack, and your girlfriend to the left of you filled with positive anticipation to meet your family.

Your sister, Alex, was turning twenty-five today. It is a big celebration for your bloodline, and though much of the original purpose of the celebration had been lost due to oral passing, the general belief was that the lucky lady who’d survive to her twenty-fifth birthday was to be guaranteed a long, fulfilling life.

Of course your sister would have a long, fulfilling life. Alex was a woman of greatness. She’d worked hard in school, got into an amazing college, met a handsome guy who she’d married as soon as she landed her first official big-girl job at some law firm in your home city. There wasn’t a doubt in your mind that Alex was guaranteed for greatness.

Alex was…perfect.

You didn’t want to go. As much as you knew it would have hurt her to not have her sister at her side for her big day, Alex would’ve understood. You never liked the elaborate, extravagant lifestyle. You were a simple girl with simple pleasures, who led a simple life and wanted nothing more than to live simply.

Though, that seems contradictory, since about a year ago, you found yourself gaining the attention and affections of the very Queen of Wakanda. How you managed that feat, you would never know.

It was Shuri who had found the invitation. She was visiting you during an monthly check up at one of the outreach facilities posted in your town, when she had inevitably seen the pretty invitation sitting on your kitchen island. It was all written in cursive, no doubt the product of your sister’s perfect penmanship, and most of all, it was addressed to you and Shuri.

You’d only told Alex of your relationship after the six month mark. You wanted to be certain that such a relationship would last; though, now that you thought back on it, what good would it have done Shuri to play you? Her intentions and integrity were clear the first day she had introduced herself to you. She’d never given you any reason to not trust her, and yet, you had still doubted her. It was a period of time you regretted most, and yet, Shuri still loved you. And in realizing that she would continue to do so, even after seeing the ugly parts of you, you allowed yourself to truly love her back.

Shuri was ecstatic to go. She wanted to meet your sister in person, having only ever seen each other through video calls and communicated through text. And with Shuri’s pretty brown doe-eyes that had always been a weakness to you, you couldn’t say no.

And now, here you were, gripping the door handle tightly as you released tight breathes, wondering if it would have been beneficial to sit Shuri down and tell her the reason why your eyes showed a glimpse of dread when she’d picked up that invitation.

“Darling?” The Queen’s voice cuts through the cloudiness that fogs your brain, grounding you in a way only her honey-laced voice could do. “Are you alright?”

No, you want to say, turn the car around, take me home. I don’t want to go there-

“Yeah, just a bit tired.”

Shuri looks at you quizzingly. You have not been acting as yourself since the day she’d stopped by your apartment. Since, she’d been trying to pinpoint the cause, but to no avail. Even after a year together, she still found you hard to read sometimes. It was endearing to her, a challenge she greatly accepted as part of the packaged deal that came with your relationship. 

However, she couldn’t deny that this time, things felt…different.

There’s a melodic beeping that comes from the vehicle, and the red flashing on the dash panel alerts Shuri that the car is running out of gas. And not a second later, a familiar voice speaks from the surround-sound speakers:

Panther, the vehicle is reaching low fuel. It would be wise to refuel soon. There is a petrol station approximately ten miles ahead. Fuel here is priced at four ninety-seven per gallon.

“Thank you, Griot,” Shuri hums, turning to you, “we shall stop there. Fill up on gas and get some snacks. You haven’t eaten much today, my love.”

Though you fix your lips to protest Shuri’s ever so keen observation, the way her hand slips over your thigh, her open palm meeting your skin through the large hole in your ripped jeans, it’s almost enough to have you relent. “I did eat; at breakfast.”

“Which was eight hours ago,” Shuri reminds you, “almost nine, once we arrive at your sisters. I’m sure there will still be room for the food if you just have one bag of chips to hold you over.”

You hate how well Shuri knows you. It makes it hard to hide things with her keen perception and observation skills. Though, you suppose those traits all come with the territory of being The Black Panther.

A sigh escapes your lips, and the lack of a reply worries Shuri. Yet, she does not push. Instead, her thumb continues to swipe in soothing strokes along the smooth skin of your thigh as she continues to drive to the designated gas station.

All of five minutes pass until it comes into view. When Shuri parks at one of the gas lanes, she fishes into her pocket for her wallet. From it she produces a black card, and hands it to you. “Fifty should bring it back up,” the Queen says, “and a bag of chips for you should do the same.”

“Shuri, I said I’m fine-”

“Darling.” Shuri’s tone is firm, yet gentle, and leaves no room for argument. So all you can do is press a kiss to her cheek - a practice routine of mundane intimacy that brings you both pleasure - before exiting the car and walking towards the entrance of the gas station.

Shuri sits back in her seat, a sigh pushing past her lips. She’s not quite sure what to make of your behavior.

In the year that the two of you have been dating, never once did you bring up the topic of your family. Shuri didn’t even know you had a sister until six months ago. Alex reminded her much of Nakia in some sense - powerful and self made, and in that regard, she was glad that you had some semblance of family you could reach out to.

Your parents, however, were another story. A story you had well avoided, and as of recently as a few months ago, downright refused to talk about. It became quite clear that it was a touchy subject for you, so Shuri didn’t pry. However, she could not deny that part of her grew…heated, at the unpleasant thoughts that plagued her mind when it came to the reason for the non-existent relationship between you and them.

“Griot.”

“Yes, Panther?”

“What were my beloved’s vitals during the ride?”

A beat passes, as Griot computes.

“(Y/N)’s heart rate had been jumping from one hundred forty-five to one hundred seventy beats per minute. Her grip on the door was strong enough to break a thin glass cup. It appears (Y/N) was on the verge of an anxiety attack, but had been fighting it off for the duration of your journey.”

Shuri curses under her breath, more or less to herself at the information that had been relayed to her. 

“She has been on edge all morning,” Shuri says aloud, “I did not ask, for fear of triggering her, but I cannot allow her to feel threatened.”

Shuri knows your triggers like the back of her hand. She’s learned to speak in a level tone to avoid startlement; she’s learned to make her presence known when entering your space; and most importantly, she reassures you, letting you know each and every day how much she loves you, how much she treasure your existence in her life, and how she vows to hold your heart with the utmost care in the world.

Shuri is the smartest person in the world, and yet, she cannot decipher the reason behind her lover’s heightened emotions. If it weren’t for the fact that she was focused on figuring out why you were like this, and how to calm you down, she’d surely find the thought embarrassing.

“Might I speak freely, Panther?”

A hum rumbles from Shuri’s throat as a sign for the artificial intelligence to continue.

“(Y/N)’s vitals have been heighted since one week ago,” Griot points out, “around the same time she had received the invitation to her sister’s birthday party. It would be safe to assume that these two instances have a correlation with one another.”

  “You are insinuating that Alex’s birthday party is somehow the cause of my love’s anxiety spiking?”

“Perhaps not the party, but rather, who will be there, Panther.”

Silence fills the car as Shuri takes in the information given to her. Though, she doesn’t have much to think on it, as she spots your figure exiting the sticker-covered glass door of the gas station, a black plastic bag in hand, of which she hopes holds the snacks she had requested of you to get for yourself. She exits the car and takes hold of the gas nozzle, opening up the tiny door and unscrewing the protection cap, and slots the nozzle into the car to fill with fuel.

A few moments pass before Shuri returns to the car, having placed the nozzle back in it’s place and secured the gas compartment. Her black card rests on the arm rest, which she slips back into her wallet as the corner of her eyes catches you with something in your hand - something that’s not a bag of chips.

“I thought I told you chips, darling?” Shuri asks as she starts up the car again.

“I got chips!” You respond. “I wanted a Twix, too.”

Your free hand fishes into the black plastic back to produce a bottle of water for Shuri, slotting it into the cup holder.

“What is this?” Shuri asks, gesturing to the water bottle.

“You were thirsty,” You point out.

Shuri indeed was thirsty. She can’t help the smile that paints her lips soon after, taking the water bottle into her hand, unscrewing the cap, and taking a swig of the water.

“Are you sure you’re alright, my love?” Shuri asks once more after setting the water back down, preparing to put the car into motion.

To busy chewing on the cookie-chocolate-caramel treat, you opt for nodding your head, a short ‘mhm’ to accompany it.

As much as Shuri wanted to question further, she knew nothing would come of it. So she slips her hand back onto your thigh, presses down on the gas, and rolls out of the gas station, the conversation with Griot filing back into her mind as she drives down the long strip of highway.

“My parents are gonna come.”

You’d said it the second Shuri had parked into the driveway of your sister’s home. With each second that passed on the way there, your chest kept growing tighter and tighter. You thought that maybe if you focused on Shuri’s touch on you, or her low singing voice when Tems starts to flood the car with her hypnotic, warm and swelling voice, that maybe you would be able to calm down and not worry her. It usually worked, but perhaps because this instance was due to the fact that you would be seeing your parents for the first time in years, what was usually the cure for your attacks did very little to help.

Shuri pauses as the words leave your lips, and for a moment, it looks as if she is cross. And while she has every right to be, you hope that it isn’t at you.

You should have told her before the two of you left, as you thought to do. It plagued your mind when you were in the shower, when you were fixing your hair, when you were choosing your outfit. And Shuri had been in the same apartment with you the entire time. You had ample enough time to tell her and yet…you didn’t. You couldn’t.

You know Shuri. She would try to remain calm and collected for you, to not show her anger, because of course she would be angry either way. The car ride would have been in silence, the air thickening with each mile crossed from one city to the other. But you would know that she was upset. She should be upset now because you just dropped this bomb on her and-

“Beloved,” the Queen mutters to you, bringing you from your thoughts once more, “look at me.”

Your head turns to face Shuri. She’s put the car into park, one arm leaning on the arm rest, the other reaching over to soothe your nerves by caressing your outer thigh. She looks at you with a softness that relieves some of the pressure on your chest stunting your breathing. Her gaze tells you that she is not cross with you.

“Hey,” she says, “I am not upset with you.” And the reassurance helps you unclench the fists your hands have balled into.

She doesn’t speak again until she’s certain that your breathing has evened out, as opposed to the harsh and forced inhale-exhale pattern from before. “Is there…anything I should know?”

You tear your eyes away, but Shuri’s gaze remains firm. Consistency is key, she’s learned, when it comes to you confiding in her. Her eyes are your safe space, you will return to them. And you do, after a short moment, trying to gather your mind together.

“They’re not nice people,” you confess, eyes hesitantly returning to hers, “they’ll try and woo you and shit, but don’t fall for it. They ain’t shit.”

“Okay,” Shuri hums, “and…is there anything I can do? For you?”

“Um,” a shaky breath racks through your throat, as you speak, “they’re not here now. Alex texted me that, so I should be fine, but when they get here…j-just, don’t leave me alone.”

“I will not leave you alone.” Shuri assures. Her hand gathers yours into hers, your palms rendered chilly from cold sweat. “I promise.”

Gathering your hands into hers, Shuri brings them to her lips and presses a kiss to them. She then reaches over to press a kiss to your lips, of which you reciprocate gladly.

“Thank you for talking to me about this,” the Queen commends, “and telling me how to best take care of you. I know it is not easy-”

“I hate it-” you correct, which brings a grin to Shuri’s lips and a chuckle from her throat, because yes, she knows you hate it.

“-but you are doing it, and I am very proud of you for it.”

It’s sincere, Shuri’s praise. It’s still not easy for you to digest it, but you know her love is not transactional, conditional. She means what she says, and you know her love for you is unconditional and unyielding. 

She loves you. 

She is proud of you.

The pressure on your chest becomes lighter.

Upon exiting the car, you’re approached by your sister, Alex, who had seen the two of you pull into the driveway and wanted to be the first person you’d engage with. You’re not shocked when you see her eyes glassy looking - it’s been years since you two last saw each other face to face.

Alex is hesitant when approaching you - she wants to envelop you in the most bone-crushing hug she can muster, because she misses you and it has been so long since she’d held her baby sister. Though all it takes is for you to outstretch your arms to her, and Alex embraces you in the way she had been dreaming of.

“Oh, mama,” Alex breathes as she pulls away to get a better look at you. You notice the youthfulness in her face and the life in her eyes. She looks happy, “look at you. All grown up. My baby sissy is all grown ‘nd shit.”

It’s heartfelt, her words, and they make you smile. Alex turns to look at Shuri, who’s chosen to stand to the side to witness the sisterly reunion without interrupting. “And you have a girlfriend? You have to tell me how this happened.”

“By complete accident,” you say, as Shuri steps up. Her hand presses into the small of your back, encouraging you while she holds the other out to greet Alex officially, “but I guess anything can happen when you spill coffee on someone in the middle of a morning rush.”

“It is a pleasure to finally meet you in person, Alex.” Shuri says.

Alex shakes Shuri’s hand, and the Queen notes the hesitance in the older sister's movements. “Well, it’s not every day you meet the queen of a country. Much less, a queen of a country that’s also my sister’s girlfriend.”

“Well, I hope not to bring too much excitement with my titles,” says Shuri, “I am more than alright with being just Shuri.”

She sincerely hoped that she could just remain Shuri. For if a situation arises that she would have to act in the manner of either of her titles - Queen or Black Panther - she could not promise that the birthday celebration would remain a splendor.

An hour passes before either of you know it. You’ve found entertainment amongst the younger cousins who all gawk at your girlfriend, who sits not too far away. Shuri has a cup of punch in hand as she watches you chase the children around the yard, a small smile on her lips. It’s as if you are reliving a part of your childhood you’ve missed, the way you seem so content with the children. It all but warms her heart.

“So,” Alex’s voice interrupts Shuri’s not so discreet admiration of her girlfriend, nearly making the Queen jump, “you and my sister?”

“Ah,” Shuri breathes, looking down into her cup as a rush of heat travels up her dark skin, “me and your sister.”

“I’m not gonna go into the whole interrogation thing, grilling you on if you’re treating her right,” Alex says, “I see how you look at her. If that ain’t the look of someone in love, then I’on know what is.”

Shuri chuckles at that, because she knows that Alex’s observations are true. In fact she has no idea just how correct her observation is.

Shuri leans forward in her seat, elbows propped up on her knees as she finds your figure amidst the mess of kids once again. Her necklace dangles from her neck, the gold contrasting against her black tee that nearly meets the fabric of her ripped blue jeans with her hunched over position.

“(Y/N) is…the ray of sunlight one sees after a long, dark night,” the Queen hums fondly, “and had I known my gods would send me such a woman, I would have prepared myself better.”

Alex smiles warmly. She can tell the strong connection between you and Shuri is pure and unadulterated. It warms her heart beyond comparison.

“Thank you for coming, truly,” Alex says, “I was almost worried she wouldn’t, since our parents would be here and everything.”

And at the mention of them, Shuri finds her jaw tightening just the slightest.

“Your parents?” Shuri is beginning to put two and two together, and she doesn’t like the outcome that is unfolding from her assumptions, however careful they are.

“I…assume she’s told you about them?” Alex implies.

Shuri shakes her head lightly, taking a sip of her semi-forgotten punch. “I find myself piecing the picture together on my own…She does not talk about them.”

“That isn’t a surprise,” Alex says, “given…well, everything.”

Shuri turns her head to look at Alex. Her eyes are firm, inquisitive; Alex’s words have sparked an interest in Shuri.

”She says they aren’t good people. Is that true?”

“Depends on who you ask,” Alex replies, “to the community, their saints. To us they’re just….people.”

Shuri notes the hint of solemness that laces Alex’s voice as she speaks. “They weren’t good to either of us…but they were especially bad to (Y/N).” Alex clarifies. “You know what they say; hurt people, hurt people.”

Not when the person is your child, Shuri thinks, but keeps to herself, taking another sip of her punch. Things are starting to make sense now, and Shuri finds that perhaps she will also have to have you at her side to ground her whenever your parents decide to show up.

“So you mean to tell me you got yourself stuck in a tree, and then got angry because she tried to help you get down?”

“I was not stuck! I was admiring the view.”

“Sure you were…with tears coming down your face.”

“I think this classifies as bullying-”

Shuri had grown quite comfortable as the next hour passed. More of your family had begun to show up, a number of aunts and uncles, nieces and nephews, and cousins wishing Alex a happy birthday as they passed through the foyer of her house and into the backyard. Shuri couldn’t count the amount of gasps she’d heard when their eyes fell upon her, sat comfortably in the outdoor gazebo, her presence obviously a surprise to the many relatives who had come to celebrate the special birthday girl. Much more, the fact that she had you close to her side as she greeted them.

The behavior of your family members irked her. Shuri suspected that Alex had talked to each of the adults to assure that they’d be on their best behavior for the occasion, given the tight smiles and curt greetings between each of them and you. Or perhaps it was because of her own intimidating presence next to you, and the fact that she wasn’t even trying to hide the look in her eyes as she analyzed each adult that seemed to pass through.

“Babe,” you cleared your throat, “stop looking like that, you’re scaring them.”

“Looking like what?”

“Like you’re contemplating murder.”

Would it have been so bad if she was, though?

Shuri sighs as she places the red solo cup she had been nursing for a while onto the table. “Just behave, for Alex-”

“I am behaving for you,” the queen clarifies, “and your sister would say the same.”

Unable to comment any further, you released an exhale through the nose, sinking back into Shuri’s side.

“It’s guilt, y’know.” You try to reason, but Shuri had already considered that route. Perhaps there were a few who did have a guilty conscience. Shuri didn’t find herself caring if that was true or not. “They’re not bad.”

“Beloved-”

“Shuri.”

“-I am merely observing,” she says, “I promise.”

Of course Shuri was only observing. Observing the behavior of each adult family member. How they acted towards you. How very little regard was given to you. How, with the amount of bodies that have accumulated in the backyard, the gazebo area remained relatively desolate, beside the two of you, Alex, and Alex’s black and white spotted cat, who had made a home on the red painted banister.

Sure. Shuri was just observing. Definitely not questioning anything at all. Definitely not formulating words she would say to your parents if they decided to make themselves an issue.

“I’m gonna go get a shot,” you say, before propping yourself up with your hands and lifting from the cushion of the outdoor couch, “you want a refill?”

You take Shuri’s cup before she officially gives you a response. You needed a way out, to move around so that the beating in your chest could quell.

Inside there isn’t much of a party scene - it's practically empty besides a teenage family member fighting their sleep on the couch while watching an infant in the living room. The music from outside is muffled when you enter the house, and you take the time to admire the mahogany walls and deep maroon floors of the home. You could compare it to the childhood home you’ve grown up in, and you think that perhaps this was Alex’s way of healing. Recreating your shared childhood environment in a more peaceful manner.

You find the kitchen quite easily, rounding the kitchen island in pursuit of the adult punch purposefully left inside so that the underaged family members wouldn’t get it confused with the family friendly punch that rested in a big glass bowl on the party table outside. On the counter is an array of liquor choices, from fruit flavored tequila to everyone's favorite, Hennessy. You weren’t a drinker, but this far into the party, you needed some sort of incentive to get you to relax a little bit.

Once you’ve chosen your choice of liquor, you take a red solo cup, pour what you deemed to be a shot's worth, and downed it in one gulp. The burn in your throat definitely woke your senses, of which you were grateful for.

On your way towards the kitchen doorway, Shuri’s refilled solo cup in hand, the sound of familiar voices drifted to your ears from the foyer, and it made you stop dead in your tracks. 

“Happy birthday baby!”

“Happy birthday, babygirl.”

“Oh, look at you, all grown up-”

It took everything in you to not drop the cup in your hand at the sound of your parents making their presence known. You backed into the kitchen again, your back finding a nearby wall to ground yourself with. Your chest began to tighten, a tight lump forming in your throat, and in that moment, your hand fished for your phone in your back pocket to text Shuri.

Kitchen. Now.

There was a light shake in your hands. You hated how just the mere sound of their voices sent you into a spiral; how much of an influence they still had on you after trying so hard to separate yourself from them. Then they had the nerve  to act pleasant.

There was a growing ringing in your ears, accompanied with the muffling of surrounding noise that made you breathe harder as you tried to stabilize yourself from the very apparent anxiety attack that was waiting to crash into you. You couldn’t decipher if it was the same one from before that you had fended off by sheer will, or if this was a new, more powerful one. However, when the smell of patchouli made its way to your nose, the thought of it became seconded.

“Hey,” Shuri whispered, one hand running the length of your arm, the other taking the cup from your hand that was seconds away from meeting the floor, and settling it onto the kitchen island, “hey, I am right here.”

“They’re out there, Shuri.” You breathe out.

Something shifts in Shuri���s eyes, and you can’t quite tell what it was, but the way her grip on you tightens in the ever so slightest way lets you know she’s thinking something.

“We can leave, beloved,” Shuri begins, but you’re quick to cut her off with a shake of your head.

“No,” you say, swallowing thickly, “I can’t leave, it’s Alex’s birthday-”

“Alex will understand, love; would she really want you to risk your own self for her?”

I’ve done it for years, the little girl in you voices tiredly, what’s another evening of it?

Shuri never wants to be forceful with you. She knows you’re your own woman and can make your own decisions, even if they go against her better judgment, even if they hurt you. Which is why, against every logical bone in her body, she proposes a compromise.

“Three chances,” Shuri says, “three chances is all they have. Then we will leave. How does that sound?”

Knowing Shuri, she’ll want to throw hands at the first encounter. It was endearing, really, how hard she went for you. The extent of such craze was never explored, simply because she was always calm, cool and collected. There was a part of you that always wondered  the extent of it as well.

And, in hindsight, you weren’t wrong about her.

Shuri peaks from the kitchen doorway and into the foyer, seeing Alex still entertaining the two adults, their backs turned towards the Queen, which gave her the incentive to leave while the trio were occupied.

She mutters a quick ‘let’s go’ with a gentle smile, and after a few seconds, you nod. Your hand finds her, tightly interlocking your fingers as Shuri pulls you back to the backyard gazebo. Shuri had no idea the depths she was about to breach in the layers of your estranged family, but whatever the case may be, she will not let you face it alone.

It was almost the perfect getaway, too, but apparently Shuri wasn’t fast enough in getting you out of the house. She heard the matured voice of your mother call out to you, asking if it was her other daughter, and Shuri supposed that it wasn’t meant to be taken in a demeaning way, but the queen certainly did. Perhaps it was predisposed biases, perhaps it was intentional. Either way, Shuri would make sure to take as much of the burden off you as she could.

“Mom,” you say, jaws tight, but Shuri stands close behind you, a hand on your waist, and it stabilizes you, “good to see you.”

The older woman, short in stature, with wide hips and thick arms, saw Shuri standing behind you, but whether or not she didn’t address her because she didn’t recognize the queen or because she simply didn’t care couldn’t be deciphered. “Come give me a hug-!”

“I’m good,” you hurriedly said, “just- uh, not feeling well.”

“Don’t be like that,” the deep, bolstering voice of your father chimed in; a large man with an intimidating physique. Shuri was not phased, her arm only snaked it’s way around your waist, “give your mama a hug, lil’ girl-”

“I said I’m good.” You reiterate more firmly, though there was an added incentive to clear your throat shortly afterwards to make your fib more believable. “Really; I know how easy it is for y’all to get sick.”

There was a moment of pause - and exchange of glances and a shift in energy before a light ‘humph’ came from your mother’s throat. “Well, I suppose that makes sense,” she snooted, “and I suppose that’s why your friend there is the exception-?”

“Girlfriend, actually,” Shuri interrupts, though it wasn’t planned, and surely wasn’t expected, “it is one of many perks of being the Black Panther. I do not succumb to normal colds and illnesses as easily.”

The pads of Shuri’s fingers press into your side as she steps beside you; she’s now side to side with you, face your parents with a high chin and a look you were sure she’d only pulled out when in front of important people - or people who she suspected would try to intimidate her, yet she’d still have to play nice for publicity purposes.

“Allow me to introduce myself formally,” Shuri said, holding out her hand for your mother to take; the shorter woman did just so as Shuri spoke again, “I am Queen Shuri to my people, but for tonight's festivities, I would like to remain just Shuri.”

“A queen?” Your mother breathes out in an amused chuckle, though you couldn’t tell if it was in actual amusement or in disbelief. “Well, perhaps we did do something right with her, hm, honey?”

Strike one.

Shuri’s hand then reaches out to your father, who stares at the long, brown arm outstretched before him for a moment, before taking one of his thick, meaty hands, and shaking Shuri’s tinier one. Though, the look on his face when the queen’s grip strengthened around his hand was enough to tell you his surprise and lack of proper judgment on the brown-skinned woman.

“Got a…firm grip for a lil’ lady.” He says.

“Well,” Shuri begins as she slips her hand from your fathers, “my baba and big brother always said a firm hand makes a firm leader.”

“Well, wise men they were.”

There was much to observe in the few words shared between Shuri and your parents. Your father hid very well behind the facade of a pleasant man of few words. Perhaps he was sculpted that way, by your mother or by his own parents; either one didn’t matter, only that the end result was a man with a weaker grip than the elders she held council with, and they were pushing their latter years of nineties and hundreds. Your parents looked to be in their mid-forties.

Your mother…Shuri admits that she wished her own were still alive, for the words she knew Ramonda would have for this short-stack of a woman would be more lethal than any weapon produced by her own hands. Condescension laced in her voice with a familiar tone of jealousy that she’d heard and witnessed many black mothers having towards their own daughters. It wasn’t hard to tell, Shuri thought, but perhaps when enough people ignore such a dangerous thing, the ugly nature becomes a tolerable norm.

“Well, if you will excuse us,” says the queen, “I’m going to take my beloved to sit down. She is in much need of rest.”

Shuri did not give your parents time to react, nor to object to the sudden ending to the conversation. She’d quickly pivoted your body around and walked back outside to the gazebo, a firm hand on your back and a ticking clock in her head for when the next strike would come.

Sure enough, Shuri did not have to wait long for that second strike. 

After getting you back to the gazebo to take a seat, on the verge of hyperventilating from the amount of anxiety the back and forth gave you, despite the fact that you weren’t even the one talking, Alex had come with a look of disdain. Your parents were in tow, as they claimed to want to ‘have a sit down and reconnect’. Of course, Shuri didn’t buy into that bullshit. Neither did Alex. And surely, neither did you.

And yet, neither you nor Alex yet had the courage to send them off, and Shuri, keeping herself in check, had no other choice but to allow them to sit with the three of you. So now you were tucked into Shuri’s side, phone in hand as a distraction, while Alex sat on a beige-cushioned chair to your left, and your parents in a similar-fashioned loveseat to the queen’s right.

Alex was kind enough to hide her discomfort in nervous laughs and meek agreements as your mother and father raved on about your childhoods. Specifically, the accomplishments of Alex, which would have been understandable as it was her birthday, if it didn’t have to include the ‘disappointments’ of yours they had to bring into the light.

“Remember the speech competition your grammar school had, Lexi-Pooh,” your mother chimed, using the youthful nickname Alex very physically cringed over, “you won your first ever trophy then at eight years old! Oh, we were so proud of you-”

“Mom, everyone got a trophy,” Alex reminded, putting emphasis on the word ‘everyone’ as she spared a glance your way, “we were babies, and it was a participation trophy. They just didn’t want us to be left out.”

“Well, still, my baby had the best poem on that stage!”

“Mom, I literally stole that poem off the internet.” Alex reasons.

“Yeah, off DeviantArt no less,” you speak with a chuckle, remembering the nights your sister scoured the internet for a poem to read because she, for the life of her, couldn’t write her own. Which she couldn’t be faulted for, she was in third grade after all.

Alex shares a small laugh as well. “If anyone should have won that competition, it should’ve been (Y/N),” She says. “All the teachers swore up and down she was gonna be the next Lorraine Hansberry or Audre Lorde. I bet you she got some bars hidden somewhere.”

Your mother could only hum in response; “Well, we can’t all be winners, I guess.”

There was a familiar sting that ached your heart. Despite how used you were to such rhetoric coming from your mother, it didn’t make the twang in your heart any less hurtful.

“You never liked that kinda stuff anyway, (Y/N),” your mother says, “so why did you join it-”

“I do like writing,” you say sharply, “and I wanted to be like my sister. Who doesn’t wanna be like their older sister at seven years old?”

You glanced up from your phone to look between the three people sitting before you. Alex shifts in her seat, uncomfortably, slightly shaking her head as she knows what is to come.

“Or were you just so busy with your perfect princess that you ain’t have time to learn me?”

“(Y/N)!” Your mother scolds, and you feel the protective arm of Shuri’s curl around you in defense. “Hush your mouth with them lies, girl!”

Your father remains silent, as he’s always done when your mother gets this way, and Shuri sees this, and takes note of it.

“I swear, I don’t know where we went wrong with you,” your mother huffs, “lost yo’ damn manners and mind talkin’ like that.”

Your mother then turns to Shuri, sporting an apologetic look, though it is not sincere, and merely a coverup for her own outburst. “Now I know your mother taught you well and good, Shuri, about how to talk to people and behave-”

“My mother is dead.” 

There is an inevitable shift in the conversation now, one that brings the eyes to Shuri as a deafening silence befalls the gazebo. Even you rise from your curled position into Shuri’s side to eye her demeanor, checking over her form to note any changes that came with the sudden mention of her mother. Yet, she is calm and collected, her eyes showing no shifts and her demeanor intact. All seemed well…on the surface, at least.

“My mother is dead, may she be at peace with the ancestors,” Shuri says, “and she is incomparable. I do not wish to speak further of her.”

A beat passes. Your hand travels to Shuri’s leg, providing a comforting touch to the woman beside you. You weren’t ignorant to the news of her family’s passing - since her father’s death, you’d had a semblance of understanding the inner turmoil she had endured. With her brother and mother gone, she was virtually alone - save for a sister-like figure and a nephew she’d only told you a little bit about in the past few months or so.

You wanted to say something, but your mother beat you to it - this time, she actually sounded somewhat apologetic for her ignorance.

“My condolences,” the woman mutters softly, clearing her throat, “I only meant that she must have had it easy raising you. You’re so well put together and polite, if only some of that would rub off on (Y/N)!”

Strike two.

“Mom, stop it,” Alex interrupts, voice firm with a scowl on her face, “you doin’ a lil’ too much now.” 

“Now, your mama ain’t said nun’ wrong,” your father suddenly speaks, who had been quite the entire conversation, but suddenly decided to stick up for his woman who was clearly in the wrong, “it’s just ladies spat, y’all know how y’all do.”

“And like I said before y’all got here, I don’t want it in my house.” Alex emphasizes. “If that’s the type of time y’all on, the door is very clearly marked with an obnoxiously pink birthday banner. Period.”

There was a small swell of pride in your chest for Alex as she set her foot down to your parents. She was determined to have them behave; she wanted a classy, friendly party for her birthday celebration. Though, she would know just as well as you that even when being put in place, the audacity of your parent’s always found itself back into trouble.

Your mother mumbled out an apology, along with something along the lines of ‘got me apologizing to my child’ under her breath as well, before you cleared your throat in an attempt to cut through the tension.

“Shuri, baby,” you hummed, “don’t we have something for Alex? In the car?”

Shuri turned to look at you, eyebrows slightly furrowed, before she officially caught on to what you were insinuating.

“Yes,” the queen breathes out with a small smile, “we do have something in the car. For the birthday girl.”

Alex, too, shares the same look Shuri previously sported, with furrowed eyebrows and confusion written on her face. “M-Me? Something for me?”

“Of course!” Shuri answers. “Surely you did not think we would show up empty handed?”

Shuri’s hand rests on your leg, both as a reminder of her very physical presence as a grounding for herself, “How foolish of me to forget. I do not know what I would do without you, my darling.”

Shuri stands, offering her hand to you as well, adding on how she will need your help to retrieve it, before escorting you from the gazebo. While on your way to exit the yard, Shuri can hear Alex giving your parents a further scolding, which makes the queen smile mischievously.

It wasn’t a complete lie for escape, however. Shuri was nice enough to buy a gift for your sister for her birthday, though it wasn’t anything massive, and despite your constant jokes of it, wasn’t a pair of kimoyo earrings (though, from Alex’s birthday outfit, she could tell that she was a jewelry girl, and a pair of earrings probably would have sufficed better).

“I’m starting to understand why you never told me about your parents,” Shuri says in a breathless scoff, pressing a button on her beads to pop open the trunk of her car, “infuriating doesn’t even begin to describe them.”

“Are you okay?” You ask in all seriousness. “The..comment about your mom, I mean.”

How could you be worried of her feelings when she’d just had to watch your mother berate you in front of her? Shuri wonders this as she turns from the open trunk of the car to face you again. Though, she supposes that from that interaction, you were more used to centering others and their emotions than yourself. Although it caused an ache in her heart, the revelation made sense of previous actions between the two of you.

“What I said was true,” the queen replies, “though I admit, perhaps there was a bite in my tongue.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t curse her out.”

“Well…I do have a promise to keep to Alex.” Shuri says in a soft laugh. “I do not want to be the cause of her birthday being ruined. Your parents are making it fairly hard to do that, however.”

Shuri closes the trunk of the car, the tiny bag holding Alex’s gift inside being set on top of it as the queen leans against the sleek black vehicle. She invites you into her embrace, pulling you between her legs and resting her hands on your hips; yours make their way onto her shoulders, a weak smile on your face.

“That’s two strikes by my count.”

“I know.”

“We have yet to even make it to dinner.”

“I know.”

“What do you want to do, beloved?”

I don’t know anymore, you think, this is all just too much.

“Let’s…stay.”

Part of you was reluctant to leave due to wanting to experience your sister’s birthday with her. You’d all but promised that you’d come to enjoy yourself with Shuri, even if your parents made that hard. But there was also an inkling of pettiness inside of you that wanted to show the assholes your parents were to the rest of your family members (who, while had suspicions of their weird behaviors and holier-than-thou rhetoric, would rather not engage in family drama to keep peace amongst the ranks). 

“I’m not letting them get the better of me,” you add on, “today is for Alex. And if they wanna make it a problem, it can be a problem.”

The look on Shuri’s face was a mix of shock and pride; she hadn’t expected you to say that, and if she were being honest with herself, she was secretly anticipating such a moment to occur. Perhaps because it would give her a chance to release the pent up frustrations that had collected within her due to your parents actions; perhaps it was because seeing you stand your ground had always been an attractive sight to her. Regardless, the small smile that spread across her face was a reflection of her hopefulness.

“One more chance, then?”

“Hopefully they make it count.”

Shuri remembers how she used to dislike family dinners.

The prospect of eating with her family irked her at a young age. Though she loved her parents and her brother dearly, her teenage self was far too absorbed in her technological advances to actively partake in the family tradition. She’d taken such a routine for granted, and now, the dinner table in the large palace she called home was barren. She barely ate there anymore, consumed by the regret of not making such precious moments a priority in her youth.

As she sits next to you at the elongated party table with the rest of your family members, she notes the same air of barrenness, but not of presence of people. It is a barrenness of love.

The behavior of certain family members began to change as the night progressed. Despite the lingering glares of your family members, many aunts and uncles approached you again, expressing their joy in seeing your presence. Perhaps it was truly the guilt that you mentioned earlier, how these extended family members were subject to the bystander syndrome, and hadn’t known how to deal with their guilty consciences for whatever reason. Perhaps these people did genuinely want to reconnect with their long lost niece, cousin, auntie. Shuri would never admit it aloud to anyone, but seeing the look of distaste upon your parents face was entertaining to say the least.

“So do you drive a space ship everywhere you go?” One of your many nephews asked the queen out of curiosity, big brown eyes and white bucked-teeth shining with glee, as he’d never seen anyone of her status before.

“Not everywhere,” Shuri answers, “only the far away places.”

“Do you go to other planets? Like Mars? Or Pluto?”

“Hmm,” the queen thinks, “I don’t think I have. I shall put that on my books and tell you about it upon my return. How does that sound, little one?”

“Awesome!”

Seeing Shuri interact with the younger children eased your tense body and racing mind. She was almost a natural with them, it seemed. You leaned into her side, your cheek squishing against her shoulder with a playful huff. “Can I have my girlfriend back, please? You’ve been askin’ her questions since we got to the table.”

“Nu-uh!” Objects the little boy. “Have not!”

“Have too, lil’ boy,” you reject, “now gon’ eat so your mama don’t yell at you.”

“Can we talk about spaceships after dinner then, Auntie Shuri?”

Shuri wasn’t sure if she should adhere to the new term, having only known the child for an hour or so, but to entertain him, she allowed it. “Sure. We can talk about spaceships after dinner.”

Thankfully, the young boy seemed to be satisfied with the compromise, and began to eat his plate of food. Shuri turns to you with an amused grin, eyebrows raised as she asks “Were you jealous of your own nephew?”

“I can be jealous if I want to,” you pout, bottom lip tucked out in protest, “lil’ shit was taking you away from me.”

Shuri laughs at your banter, both glad that you’ve somewhat relaxed, and that the evening seemed to be going well. She hoped that it would stay like this.

The clinking of metal to glass caught her attention, as well as the other partygoers. Looking towards the head of the table, Alex is standing, grasping the attention of everyone in order to speak.

“Now, we all know the reason today is such an important day, aside from the fact that it’s my birthday,” Alex begins, glancing around the table, making eye contact with each individual, “though some of the kids might not know. And since we have a newcomer with us,” she says, gesturing to Shuri, who returns a nod of acknowledgement as she speaks, “I figured now is as good of a time to talk about why we celebrate the twenty-fifth birthday of the girls in our family.”

Alex sets the glass down, clears her throat, and speaks again. “Now the story has never been written down, but anyone who has sat between Nana and Great Nana’s legs to get their hair done will know the story by heart. A generation or so before them, our family had a ‘curse’ on us girls. One of our enslaved ancestors was forced to ‘engage’ with their owner who desired a mixed child. That ancestor cursed our bloodline so that no girls would survive, and slowly our numbers began to dwindle.”

You always loved to hear this story. You were never sure why, but it had always been more than hair braiding entertainment to keep a child's attention. The raw history that your grandmother and great-grandmother passed down your line of lineage always held a special place in your heart.

“Then one thing lead to another, a generation passes, and a girl is born…and she lives old enough to run away with another slave guy she fell in love with. And that ancestor had Great Nana, who had Nana, who had mom and the aunties…who had us.”

You’d been sitting to Alex’s right when she extended her hand to you to hold. You accepted it with a warm smile. She’d done the same to your mother as well.

“Reaching twenty-five is like a right of passage. Guarantees to a long, fulfilling life. And that is what we celebrate tonight.”

There were a series of claps, cheers, whoops and hollers that erupted from the table, coming from the queen herself as well. It was indeed a remarkable retelling, she thought, and she even noticed the way that Alex posed herself as a bridge between you and your mother. She applauded the woman for still trying to reconcile, but knew that there was no hope for such a feat.

As soon as Alex sat down, your mother took a stand. “I’d like to make a toast as well.”

Shuri felt you lean just a little bit closer to her. 

“My baby, oh, what can I even say?” Your mother begins, striking up a face of pride. “You were perfect since the day I first laid eyes on you. I knew you’d be destined for greatness, and I can’t be any more proud of you than I am now. My baby girl is all grown up, and I can’t wait to see more of the outstanding woman you’ve become…”

Another round of applause echoes throughout the backyard, and Shuri breathes. Though she doesn’t trust your mother one bit, the words that came from her mouth seemed very genuine-

“...and you are more than fit to carry on this tradition. My only daughter that can.”

-nevermind.

The distant crickets could be heard as your mother took her seat again, seemingly proud of her little stunt. Perhaps she thought it was something good to say, but neither you, Alex, or Shuri saw the need for the ending.

“That ending wasn’t needed, but thank you.” Alex says through gritted teeth, a sigh leaving her lips. It was much like the older woman to need the last word, and although Alex truly hoped she would behave, her own patience was waning thin with the woman and her antics.

“We have a toast as well!”

Shuri whips her head to you, brows furrowed in confusion as she whispers, “We do?”

The words leave your lips before you can actually think about what you’re about to do. Upstaging your mother had never been something you’d acted upon, although you’d fantasized about shutting her up numerous times with your own words; the courage was just never there. Perhaps it was because now you were older, or perhaps it was because you now knew that Alex was on your side, or perhaps it was because you had Shuri next to you to back you up. Whatever it was, it began surging through your veins that once were riddled and crippled with anxiety.

Nonetheless, you’re standing up, and so is Shuri, so there isn’t any backing down now. All eyes were on you.

“Sister,” you begin, reaching your hand out Alex who stands up again to be eye level with you, “I will make this quick, ‘cuz you know I hate sappy shit.”

Alex laughs a little. Her grip on your hands is comforting, and the way she looks at you is almost in a coaching matter. She hadn’t expected such a burst of confidence either, but wasn’t about to let you face it alone.

“We’ve had our…ups and down,” you say, “and there were ‘things’ happening that I blamed you for, that I pushed you away for. But you’ve always been there. You were..the only person there.”

You feel Shuri’s hand caress the small of your back for support. You feel like crying, and you're not sure the reason for it, but you push it down and continue.

“I am grateful for you, and I’m glad I came to celebrate with you…and I love you.”

The air that was once thick when you started to speak seemed to ease when you said those last three words. And again, claps and praises flew out into the air at the confession. Alex, the much more sappier of one of the two of you, tried to keep her eyes from swelling with tears, but of course it was harder for her to do so.

“Don’t you start crying,” you say playfully through the loudness of the table, “‘cus you know if you do, then I’ma start crying, and we just gon’ be two snotty nosed bitches-”

Yet you didn’t get the chance to finish, because Alex then pulls you into her embrace. It’s tight and full of love, and she gives you no choice but to sink into it. For a second, it seems like the noise drowns out as you bask in the love from your sister, and you hear a faint ‘thank you’ being whispered into your ear right as she pulls away.

“I suppose this means it is my turn,” Shuri says sheepishly, once the embrace has finished and you’ve returned right at her side. She’d been thinking of what to day this entire time, though each scenario that she had run through her head didn’t seem worthy of a quality toast to a quality woman, “I shall try to make this toast worthy of your time, Miss Birthday Girl.”

“Sitting at this table, surrounded by all of you; it reminds me of a similar family routine that I took for granted in my youth.” Shuri’s eyes gaze from person to person as she speaks. “You see, I was too absorbed in my technological advances to truly appreciate the aspects of family dinners. The mundaneness of sitting with one another and being present. I used to want to give anything to be left to my own devices. And now, I sit at the head of the same table, with no one. I am Queen of the most powerful nation in the world, and my entire family is gone.”

Another silence fills the table as everyone looks onto Shuri; her head is held high as she speaks, though, voice unwavering. She breathes when she feels your hand slip into hers.

“Alex, you are a very blessed woman to have your family here with you to celebrate a generational obstacle overcome,” the queen bids, “and for that, I propose a toast to you, and a saying from my people to yours.”

The queen picks up her red cup, and watches as each individual picks up their own, before speaking again. “To Alex, a woman of virtue and genuity. ‘Akukho mntu ngaphandle kwesidenge ophika usapho lwakhe’.”

A round of cheers sounds before everyone downs a gulp of their chosen drinks in unison, applauding Shuri for her heartfelt toast and gratitude. As the both of you sit, and light chatter begins to cover the table, your mother calls out to Shuri with a look of curiosity.

“Such a lovely quote, Shuri,” your mother says, “what does it mean?”

“Oh, the proverb,” Shuri says, “it is one my baba used to say.”

“Did he now?”

“It means ‘No one but a fool denies their family’.”

Hearing this, your gaze shifts from the food in front of you to Shuri, who sports a proud smirk as she watches your mother grow uncomfortable in her seat from the queen’s words. As if she were putting the dots together in her own head.

With Dinner done, your nephew was all too quick to pull the queen aside to continue their conversation about her fancy spaceships. While his eagerness was endearing, Shuri had to put the conversation on hold because of an important phone call that came through. You assumed that it was Ayo, a name you had heard in fleeting conversations, but knew it to be a person of importance to Shuri. A captain of her Queen’s Guard, which Shuri had respectfully asked to fall back on attending the outing with the both of you, since it was a family thing, and Shuri didn’t want Alex’s neighbors questioning why so many bald-headed women were lingering around her house.

She said she would make the call quick, five minutes at most, before stepping into the house for quiet and privacy. The loss of her presence made you slightly anxious, but you maintained your spot in the gazebo, and Alex popped in here and there. She was the host, so she had to engage with the rest of her partygoers, but you were more than grateful that she took the time out to still check in on you, despite it being her day.

You took a sip of your drink - the adult punch that had been put in the kitchen so kids couldn’t get to it - and watched the party goers enjoy themselves from the comfort of your seat. Children running around, chasing each other with sparklers; aunties and uncles dancing to the old school remix; teens making TikTok videos with dances and skits. For a moment, things were content, and everyone was happy. Normal.

For a moment, for the first time in a long time, you felt happy with your family. 

“You’ve found this corner real comfortable, I see.”

The voice of your mother slips through he peaceful silence that previously covered the gazebo, and although you don’t feel it at first, your body begins to tense. She herself sports a red solo cup, though you can’t tell what’s inside of it. 

She doesn’t ask to join you - just takes up a single seat across from you - and even if she were to ask, you aren’t sure if you could even mutter an answer.

“It’s been so long since you’ve left,” your mother says, “since you decided you were grown enough and left your family behind. How has life been for you?”

“Good.” You reply, short and curt, taking a sip from your drink.

“You seem more than good,” she continues, “I assume living with a queen gives you a lot of financial relief-”

“If you came over here to start shit, please don’t.” You quickly cut off. “One; my relationship is of no concern to you, but Shuri doesn’t pay for shit of mine that I have. I was good before I met her, and I’m still going good on my own.”

You weren’t sure where the sudden crossness came from, but you definitely knew it had something to do with your mother’s constant mention of Shuri, as if she held prominent importance tonight and not the other child she’d birthed. “And it’s Alex’s birthday. I’m here for her.”

Your mother scoffs at your words, “-and there you go, twistin’ my words around and making me seem like the enemy. I’m just trying to talk to you!”

“Bullshit,” you spit, rising from your seat in a quick bid to find a quick exit into an area more populated, and more importantly, away from her, “I’m not doing this with you.”

You turn to try and leave, but your mother continues to speak behind you, pushing you further, “you’re so ungrateful; after everything we’ve done for you, you can’t even show an ounce of respect to your own mother.”

In that moment your body froze on the steps of the gazebo. A dull chill awakens within you, spreading through your limbs, your skin nearly rising into goosebumps, before a wave of anger crashes in.

“Fine,” you mutter, “you wanna ‘talk’?”

You turn to face your mother once again, eyes burning holes into her face, which has the audacity to hold a look of shock. “Let’s fucking talk.”

“Oh, but where to begin?” You scoff. “Maybe lets talk about how you can’t seem to ever say one good thing about me. It’s always some backhanded comment that you can’t help to point out how amazing Alex was and how shitty I was in comparison-”

“-that is not true,” your mother tries to interject, “but you were - and still are - a difficult child-”

“-I wasn’t fucking difficult!” You shout, drawing a few pairs of eyes to you and your mother. “I wanted fucking attention that you weren’t giving me! And you thought beating me was the best way to get me to ‘stop acting out’?”

“It was discipline!”

“Oh, but Alex never needed it though, right?” You question. “Alex was just so perfect to yall. She got the best of everything while your little mistake became the punching bag you took your frustrations out on!”

The increasing shouting started to draw attention from the other partygoers, who muttered among themselves, wondering the reason for the altercation, questioning if they should intervene. And it only got worse when the sound of skin slapping skin echoed throughout the backyard, making the music that played from outdoor speakers seem quiet.

Your mother, the pious, religious, righteous woman she claimed to be, just slapped you in front of the rest of your family.

“What’s going on over here?” The voice of your father bellows as he approaches the gazebo, having only made his presence known after a few gasps from seeing your mother hit you.

“I will not be disrespected by you, you ungrateful wench,” your mother seethes, “I was a damn good mother to you, even when we fell on hard times. I raised you!”

“I was a fucking kid!” You yell back. “How does a fucking adult take their anger out on their own kid!?”

“And you,” comes your voice through gritted teeth upon seeing your father coming to console your mother, which seemed to anger you even more, “dear old dad, who never ‘picked a side’. You sat there and watched as she fucked up her own kid.”

Your voice comes out more strained, wavering at the sight of your father. The man you saw treat Alex like a literal princess while you could only ever dream of being treated as such. You knew the next words you’d say were going to push his buttons - perhaps part of you wanted a reaction from him that could show that maybe, somewhere inside of him, he cared when your mother didn’t.

“If anything you’re more of a bitch than her!”

You weren’t sure what scared you more in that moment; the loud grunt and your fathers arms menacingly reaching out towards you, or the flash of black that shot across your vision right before you closed your eyes shut, anticipating something to happen.

The silence was deafening as you felt your legs stumble back into something warm but you were too scared to open your eyes yet. Of all your senses that had been stricken with tension, the first to register with reality once again was your hearing.

“I want you to think carefully about your next actions,” the queen’s voice comes out hardened and unyielding, “because I can assure you, I will not have to think about mine.”

That flash of black that had crossed your vision earlier had been Shuri. And if your eyes had been open, you yourself would have shuddered at the pure rage that was present on her face.

Shuri’s hand, albeit tiny and delicate in most cases, held your father’s wrist in a right grasp, and despite the broader man's struggles to pull free, it was futile. She was not letting him go, and neither was the intensity of her stare that held your mother’s gaze. 

“If you don’t let my husband go-”

“Shut. Up.” And her words were absolute, leaving no room for question. Perhaps it was part of the authoritarian aura that she’d gained from taking on her queenship that shut your mother up, but whatever the case may have been, Shuri admits that she certainly enjoyed the look of surprise on your mother’s face.

“Alex,” Shuri says, and it now becomes clear to you that the thing you had back into was your very sister. It also became clear how tight her grip on you was, as if she were scared to let you go, “take my beloved back to my car. We will be leaving shortly.”

There’s a gentle nudge and a hushed ‘c’mon’ before you feel yourself being moved sideways, then forward, Alex doing as Shuri says and relocating you to the front of her home to get you into a safer, calmer place.

It isn’t until Shuri sees your figure disappear behind the wooden fence that she releases your father’s wrist. The man winces as he regains control of his limb, his wife bringing her hands to soothe the skin where it was beginning to turn purple from just how tight her grasp was.

Shuri turns in a slow circle, eyes scanning each and every one of the individuals who’d stood by and undoubtedly watched the scene unfold, offering no sign of intervention. “This is what your family is?” She calls out. “It is sickening.”

The guilt shines in their eyes but Shuri has none of it. To her, they are all just as guilty as your parents, for they've watched the same scene unfold many times before, and just the same, no one stood up.

The queen turns back to your parents, as she bites the inside of her cheek to control her composure. “I do not know your story,” she says, “nor do I wish to, and now, nor do I care. I only leave you with this as I leave.”

Shuri takes a step forward to your parents, jaw clenched tight and piercing eyes meeting theirs once again. “My (Y/N) will be loved…as it is clearly something neither of you could bestow upon her.”

And in the same flash of black she leaves the party, that had long gone silent, and biting her tongue so hard she thought she’d draw blood.

Exitting the back yard, Shuri comes around the front to see you and Alex sitting on the porch steps. She holds a towel to your cheek, whispering to you with care about holding the cold, wet cloth gently on your cheek to battle the inflammation. It was the first and only thing she could grab without immediately leaving your side, the green garden hose still running into the grass proof of it.

It takes everything in Shuri not to run to you, to pull you into her arms and cradle you into her embrace, to shield you from the cruelness that has surely been brought back to the forefront of your mind. There’s a pit in her stomach that churns with the pain of unease, and it eats at her as she thinks; if she had just been swifter with that call with Ayo, or better yet, not even answered at all, then you wouldn’t have been left alone, and you wouldn’t have gotten hurt.

Shuri grows closer and realizes that the both of you are crying, and her heart tightens in her chest. She bends down to meet you on eye level, resting a soothing hand on your leg. Alex holds her head in one hand, her other still grasped tightly onto your side, holding you close to her. Shuri finally understands what Alex meant when she talked about the varying levels of harm done to the sisters in their youth. You took the physical and verbal brunt, while Alex took the emotional.

“This was not suppose to happen.” Shuri hears Alex mutter, and the queen quickly cuts in before Alex has a chance to even say as such.

“It is not your fault, Alex,” the queen asserts, “you cannot be responsible for the actions of your parents.”

Alex looks up to Shuri, sniffling as their eyes connect. A beat passes before the older sister nods, though her jaw is still tight with tension. There’s a shift in Alex’s eyes, from sadness and regret, to a hardened security.

“I need to get my house in order,” she says, glancing to her side, and reluctantly peeling her arm from around your waist, “party’s officially over.”

Alex stands to do just as she intends, and as she leaves, Shuri grows closer to you. One hand rubs circles into your knee, the other one gently lifts your face up to meet hers. Your eyes are tired, likely due to adrenaline fatigue, but your body still shakes with a light tremble.

“I am taking you home.” She says, leaving no room for argument; even though, in your current state, you couldn’t refuse her if you wanted to. So when Shuri wraps her arms around you and lifts you to your feet, you all but lean into her warmth. 

And the kiss she presses into the crown of your head provides reassurance that even after the events that have unfolded, with Shuri, you will be okay.

If you enjoyed, please leave a like, comment, and reblog for others to see! And don’t be shy to send in a request!

[blue--ingenue]

Albus Anger Headcanons [Part 1]

Author's Note: Based on an ask from the lovely @luuhy-blue asking about Albus' anger. I wanted to explore how his anger evolved since first coming to Hogwarts. Most of these are based on Thomas Grant's portrayal of Al. This is going to be an ongoing series because I was editing and realized I have too much to cover in a single post. [Content Warnings: mentions of depression, anxiety]

it begins as betrayal. in the first scene we see Albus - anxious of the crowd gawking at his family, terrified at the prospect of being sorted into Slytherin - and his immediate instinct is to seek comfort from his dad. at this point in his life he trusts Harry wholeheartedly, only calming down once he tells Al he needn't be afraid

he's tender-hearted, funny, and sweet, but the relentless bullying encourages him to stuff away those parts of him to make himself a smaller target. we see some of his goofiness throughout the play - and only when he's with people he feels safe with:

lifting his broom above his head and laughing while saying "up" in a silly voice; he isn't too upset about being the only one whose broom doesn't cooperate, but once Polly and his classmates mock him instead of laughing along, he deflates. they tell him he's m like Harry, call him the 'Slytherin Squib,' and he retreats into himself. we don't see this lighthearted side of him for awhile

he trusts Scorpius with every fiber of his being. up in the Owlery he pretends to echo his voice, joking that using Bombarda to destroy the timeturner would wake everyone in the castle. Scorpius' smile at this rarely-seen side of Al is positively beaming

we see this one more time at the end of the play - when he talks with Harry at Cedric's grave. he's beginning to trust his father again and jokes about wanting to go into pigeon racing after graduation

focusing back on his first few years at Hogwarts, we see Harry belittle and ignore his pain. Hogwarts was Harry's sanctuary - the place that saved him from the Dursley's, offered escape from his abusive relatives, taught him magic, offered the only connection to his parents that he's ever known. it's the place where he grew up, met the love of his life, made lifelong friends, and discovered his own powers. his experience is so at odds with what Albus is telling him, that he refuses to reconcile the two versions he's being presented with. along with the fact that Harry's spent most of his life in "survival mode," he can't believe that his son's problems are as grave as he's making them out to be

jumping back to the Platform at the start of second year: i always get SO PISSED OFF when Albus looks to his dad for safety and understanding and Harry isn't even looking at him - he's signing his autograph on the stomach of that random Hufflepuff student. like, your son has been in clear distress for over a year. he's telling you exactly what's wrong. he's about to enter another year of relentless bullying, and you won't see him in-person until the Christmas holidays (months away) and you won't even look at him while he's pouring his heart out

he feels deeply betrayed. his father refuses to hear his pleas - and on the rare occasions that Harry listens, he refuses to understand. he tells Al that his feelings are temporary, that Albus is the one who should be trying harder to enjoy his school experience. he tells Albus to try making more friends - different friends - and compares Al's experience to his own. the very person he seeks out for love, safety, and understanding makes him feel like it's his own fault that he feels the way he does

i don't think that Harry intentionally makes Albus feel belittled, but regardless of his intention, the end result is that Albus is constantly anxious and depressed. he's living through his developmental years facing constant bullying, watching his best (and only) friend face similar torment, and it hurts

Harry refuses to believe him, Rose laughs at him, James (although his teasing is more lighthearted than the rest) adds fuel to the fire, and he feels betrayed. he has a massive family - between the Potters, Weasleys, and Delacours - and nobody but Ginny understands him. he's used to feeling ostracized and left out at school. and now, even when he's with the people he's meant to feel closest to, he still feels ostracized

[myemuisemo]

"Modern Belgian masters" distracted me at the beginning of chapter V of The Hound of the Baskervilles in the most recent Letters from Watson. Doyle's offhand references to literature, pop culture, and politics usually have some substance behind them, and "modern Belgian masters" did not disappoint.

Belgium was a hotbed of artistic controversy! In 1876, a group of "rebellious" artists can formed what became L'Essor as a counterpoint to conservative art institutions. In 1883, L'Essor refused to exhibit James Ensor's De oestereetster on grounds that the painting was too risque (since oysters were considered an aphrodisiac, as well as resembling certain female parts). Rebels against L'Essor formed Les XX, which held its own exhibitions featuring more avant-garde artists, including Monet, Gauguin, Van Gogh, and Seurat.

Since Watson refers to Holmes having "the crudest ideas" about art, I'm guessing Holmes sided with Les XX on using experimental styles and unusual subjects to provoke (and to make political points). Whether the conversation included Ensor's etching Le pisseur, which shows Ensor urinating on a wall of graffiti that declares "Ensor es fou" (Ensor is crazy)... we can only hope.

This is just the beginning of a chapter that contains a lot of sly humor. For instance, when Holmes social-engineers information out of the desk clerk, the guests he asks about are a coal-merchant from Newcastle (so known for its coal that the phrase "like taking coals to Newscastle" meant taking a thing to a place where everyone already has plenty) and a very old lady named Mrs. Oldmore.

Sir Henry Baskerville establishes himself as rough-edged, choleric, and unaware of social nuance by yelling at the German waiter. Being rude to any staff would have been seen as ungentlemanly at the time (as now). There's more to it, though. Germans were the largest immigrant group in London in 1889, and their tradition of professional training made them highly in demand as waiters (source).

And then there's the man with the black beard, who has the wit and gall to tell the cab driver that he's Sherlock Holmes. It seems that there have not been sketches of Holmes in any press! Is he the same man with a black beard as butler Barrymore?

The telegram experiment seems to indicate not, but I'm not sure how probative it is.

The bearded man in the cab had his cab driver make haste to Waterloo Station, which served the London & Southwestern Railway. The L&SR took a northern route around Dartmoor, stopping at Exeter and Plymouth.

Watson and Sir Henry will be leaving from Paddington Station, which served the Great Western Railway. GWR takes the southern route along the Devon coast.

When I look at modern railroad schedules, a trip from London to somewhere around Dartmoor takes about 3.5 hours. Is that within the time frame of Sir Henry and Mortimer walking back to the Northumberland, the wait for Holmes and Dr. Watson to arrive for lunch, the luncheon itself, and finally the rigamarole of sending the telegram? It feels to me like it could be -- and also, when I was looking up old schedules for the short story with the missing train, it seems that sometimes Victorian lines ran faster than modern ones.

How common even were black beards? In latter half of the 19th century, beards were fashionable, though not universal. Dr. Alun Withey's discussion of 19th century beard styles shows an ad for false beards. The style at far right looks about right.

It's possible that someone is framing -- or just confusing the issue by imitating -- the butler Barrymore.

We are assured again that Rodger Baskerville died unmarried, which is starting to strike me as "protesteth too much."

Rodger is the one who went to make his fortune in South America. The largest silver deposits were in Bolivia and Peru, and Agatha Christie's Hastings goes to Argentina, so those are the countries where I started on looking for when civil registration of marriages and births started. The answers are 1940 in Bolivia, 1886 in Peru, and 1886 in Argentina. Peru did not start registering deaths until 1889. Before that time, proving a marriage or a birth meant going to the parish church records.

So the Baskerville family solicitor could not simply send a telegram to a government agency in the capital of Bolivia, nor hire a clerk at a Bolivian law office in the capital city to go check. Someone would have to identify the parish where Rodger would have married, produced an heir, or died -- which might be three different places. And then someone has to see about looking through a handwritten register.

How sure are we really that Rodger is even dead?

Since Holmes is so eager to send Watson along with Sir Henry, I assume he's counting on Watson's credulity to maximize the impact of planned shenanigans. Is this a story about a mysterious dog or a story about a grift?

[crooked-wasteland]

Hazbin Hotel LiveBlog: Scrambled Eggs

So I’m watching Hazbin with my partner who has already seen the entire series. It took us 5 minutes just to get this episode to play from the beginning because it would just skip to episode 4 while the credits where playing before i could pause or rewind. That has nothing to do with the show, it just made me unbelievably enraged, so we ain’t going into this episode happy.

What is with the cat?

It’s been a week since the last episode and every ounce of progress Sir Pentious made last episode is just thrown out as an excuse to introduce yet another character in Carmella. Was there not another way to do this? Like I get Sir Pentious wouldn’t be reformed, but just having him be suddenly paranoid with no reason isn’t founded. Even just a background detail of Angel Dust watching him from a doorway would have been enough to found that suspicion. Especially when Pentious wasn’t shown to be paranoid as a trait. I get this is narrative utilitarianism, but it’s just weak and changing one character’s personality to establish a new one is poor writing.

Sir Pentious to his eggs just feels like fandom

“That’s a lot less hot” That feels out of character

So Trust exercises to tone down the sudden change in Sir Pentious’ character and also to give Vaggie a leading role. Got it. Very utilitarian, very disjointed from the previous episode.

Sidebar, I googled who wrote this episode and it wasn’t Vivienne, however I never would have known because the last episode was equally full of contradictions that it also felt like someone else wrote it. Now maybe that was because Adam had a hand in thing, but The fact I have to google this stuff to know for sure is a joke kin its own right.

I am so conflicted about Niffty. She feels less childlike here and I like find her demented fun, but last episode she was literally written as being child-like so the pain fetish going on is repulsive, despite it not being this writer’s fault. If I want to enjoy anything about this show, I really have to just see every episode as one singular complete entity without calling back on previous ones, however this is a series and thus needs to expand itself through subsequent episodes. To not do so is a failure of concept because this series is very serialized. So in a bubble I really enjoy Niffty. In the series she is a very uncomfortable character to give violent fetishes to and make them so overt. Vivienne ruined that for you all, don’t blame me. Someone should have said how this should have been scrapped before we got this far.

Zestial is suggesting that Alastor may have died at Heaven’s hand. Alastor looks away while laughing. So there is a connection between Heaven and Alastor.

Egg Bois are cute.

Carmella has a bad case of Character Design does not match vocal performance.

Velvette, please never speak again.

Velvette is now 5 inches tall

The yellow blood looks like piss

Can someone tell Lilli Cooper that a lot of British singers don’t have such strong accents when singing. Just please, it’s a great time top drop that bad accent.

James, hi, your singing voice lost the character

The kink shaming be real.

Even Charlie infantalizes Niffty. Geez

This scene in the Turf war was peak Angel Dust. I laughed.

I have to ask, was the music written before or after the singing, because for one, Carmella sounds like she is trying to be heard over it, and second the beat of the music is either lacking or there was an issue with the audio mixing because it just sounds wrong. Like there are melodies and harmonies to a score and one of those is missing. OR, the music is just out of sync entirely with the performer.

Again, just don’t have Vaggie sing. You directed the actor to perform out of her vocal range for her modal voice. Don’t do this to her.

They are not at all harmonized, this is the worst duet I ever heard. Don’t you usually have singers record duets together so they can harmonize their voices? Why didn’t that happen here.

So this big conflict for Vaggie was never a conflict. Best resolution ever.

I like Carmella’s concept. Her character design is kinda trash and the songs were terrible. There was a good idea somewhere in this episode, but from beginning to end every aspect was contrived to just make the story work for the greater plot, the dynamics between the characters be damned. There is a sense of someone wanting to have fun with it while Medrano’s stood behind them with a chokehold on the narrative. It’s disappointing and I feel the writing suffers from Medrano’s obsessive and frantic need for control. This writing feels so insecure and I can only imagine that comes from having a very narrow box to fill.

2/10

I’m taking a break.

[izzy-art-879]

The Soda Pop Gang

The Soda Pop Gang are a group of cowboys and cowgirls from Texas who steal soda from anyone. Whether they're from kids, teens, adults or soda companies, if someone's got soda they'll steal it. As you can tell, they have a soda problem that they refuse to address. They're not only wanted by the Kids Next Door, but they're even wanted by the police AND FBI. So yeah, you better hide your soda when they're around.

They're one of the recurring adult enemies of Sector QT and they're quite a problem for them! They've recently rode into Sector QT's hometown and have been nuisances to them ever since, stealing soda from parties and events wherever they go. They talk in southern accents and unlike most adults, they hate tea and coffee. The gang consists of Rudy James, Celine Starr, Blakely Booney, Leanna Dunn and Victor Cassidy. All of them are in their 20's.

Rudy James

The leader of the gang

A quick-witted smooth-talker

His favorite type of soda is root beer (he's also a fan of root beer float)

Keeps his cool (sometimes)

Gets flustered easily (usually by Celine)

Celine Starr

Rudy's girlfriend

Charming and cunning

Second in command and acts as leader whenever Rudy is absent

Not afraid to speak her mind and can lose her temper easily

Also not afraid to get dirty

Still waiting for the day Rudy proposes to her

Blakely Booney

The nice one

Not the brightest but not an idiot

Can be tricked easily and overly nice at times (but can still get pretty aggressive like the rest of the gang)

Goes by Blake or Boon for short

Is the only one who still has a healthy and happy relationship with his family and keeps in touch with them

Leanna Dunn

Goes by Lee or Lee-Lee for short

A bit of a ditz and airhead

Like Blakely, she's also too nice

Flirty and is currently looking for a boyfriend (unbeknownst to her, Blakely has a crush on her)

May seem meek and innocent but can be most aggressive and hostile if provoked

Victor Cassidy

Goes by Vic for short

Cool and calculating but has a sadistic side

Hates tea and coffee the most with a burning passion

Snarky and intimidating

Very intelligent and creates new soda guns for the gang

The gang ride on their trusty horses and carry soda-filled guns with them. They won't hesitate to resort to violence to get their soda but won't got too far (for now). They've been together since they were little and started their soda crime spree during their teen years.

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Top Secret Kids Next Door Files

The Soda Pop Gang were once Sector TX who weren't popular in the beginning but slowly but surely the ragtag team became well-known in the KND. But of course, like all great legends they had to be decommissioned when they turned 13. Then unfortunately due to a series of events, they became the Soda Pop Gang.

But once Sector QT find out about the secret truth about them, they're determine to recommission them and bring them to the side of good! They may have a chance to do that when the team have to deal with a new upcoming threat. Let's just say, they're going to need all the help they can get...

[sparklenothing]

'cause when you know, you know

summary: you liked james. james liked lily. that was clear as water, right?

tags: james potter x reader ,, fluff  ,, some unrequited love ,, little bit of angst ,,  modern cafe au

warnings: stubborn stupid jokey characters

a/n: english is not my first language. i haven't written anything in so long, and this is probably vague and not very on character, so constructive criticism is welcomed:)

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

every time you’d allow your gaze to go over to him, amidst a group conversation, you were hoping to find him looking right back at you. but he never was, his eyes were forever fixed on the girl with the beautiful ginger hair. you couldn't blame him, you worshipped her as much as the next person. she was sunshine inside and outside, smart and funny, loving, caring, everything one would hope to be or get to love.

that didn't take away from the fact that you were also smart, funny, loving, or caring. but on her, it looked better, according to your rotten mind. right?

you could've spent the entire night, now with your eyes stuck like knives on the wooden table before you, but an arm sliding above your shoulders made you look up. remus, aware of the feelings you were destined to take to your grave, sent you an empathic smile. naturally, your body sank against him, and your hand grabbed the one on your shoulder.

“you could try n talk to him, you know?” he whispered to your ear, knowing that if anyone found out, you would act like it was the death of you.

“i’d rather choke on my own vomit, thank you, rem.” his body beneath you vibrated because of the laugh he seconds later tried to push back.

anyhow, james and i are just friends, nothing else will ever become of it.

on your other side was sirius, holding your free hand and twisting the rings you wore, joining the conversation to begin babbling about how unfair it was that remus would hug you like that and not him. of course, the young man was met with nothing but jokes about his jealousy.

true jealousy was watching from the other side of the table. crossed arms, lips pressed into a fine line, frown in forehead, and chest puffing rapidly by the way his breath was speeding up.

james could not bear the sight, his two best friends fawning over you, while he was stuck between peter and marlene’s childhood inside jokes. needn't worry, soon enough they would follow his eyes to find you laughing while remus kissed your forehead and sirius your cheek, your face turning bright red.

“you’re such a loser.” peter stated, shaking his head. marlene just nodded and shrugged her shoulders when he looked at her saying you should be on my side.

“stop pretending to be in love with evans to hide away from the fact that this time you like someone who likes you back.” marlene got up, grabbing her wine glass. “honestly, your lack of bravery is a disgrace to gryffindor himself.”

peter gave him a final pat on the back and followed the blond woman to the kitchen, where lily and mary were.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

a week had gone by. marlene's words were still loud in his head. since the moment he met you, he knew. he knew he only cared to spend the rest of his life with you, loving you, caring for you. but the idea of messing up a reliable friendship and maybe causing turmoils in their group had been enough to continue with the charade of pursuing lily. she was aware it was a joke, it had been a joke between them since one drunk night she confessed to only liking women. from that night on, they would find each other to crush on you. their eyes would link whenever you smiled, laughed, or did anything that required no effort yet made james’ heart skip a beat.

of course, lily found you simply cute. so she would tease james non-stop, about how shy and quiet the loud golden retriever boy would get.

“hey!” a well-known female voice got him out of his head.

there you were, smiling at him from the order line of the little coffee shop they all took small shifts at, owned by remus. today it had been a slow and boring day. it read 20:10pm on the clock, five minutes away from closing.

“hi. what are you doing here? we are almost closed.” he greeted you, feeling his demeanor fall into straight panic and anxiety.

“had to drop off some stuff, and don't worry about closing i'm probably gonna stay here for dinner.”

stop pretending. that was it, that was his only chance to be alone with you and finally build up the courage to speak up about his very well-hidden feelings.

fifteen minutes went by. you had finished organizing the boxes you had to drop there. doors were locked, most lights turned off, and james had finished his night shift. but he was still there. you didn't wanna be annoying and ask, even though you were friends and it was okay.

“what do you wanna eat? i’ll make it. i’ll join you for dinner.” james said, walking into the back kitchen.

half an hour, two sandwiches and two cups of coffee later, you were both laughing at a recent memory of sirius' jealousy outburst when remus had opened the door for a girl at the cafe, and not him.

“even as a jealous person myself, i thought he was being a little dramatic.” james said, winning an incredulous look from you. “what?”

“you’re not a jealous person. i’ve never seen you flip out at evans because of anything.” you answered. there it was.

“that’s cause i’ve got no reason to be jealous because of her.” james watched the look on your face shift into something that looked more like confusion. “... cause i don’t fancy her.”

that was news to you. thinking, you ate the last bit of your sandwich, giving you a moment to think how to phrase the million questions that ran through your mind.

“i’m confused. haven't you liked her for like ten years now?” you said almost laughing, like a joke. but you were actually dying. needing to know more, but you wouldn't pry.

to your unfortunate self, james didn't answer immediately, he just looked at you in a way you couldn’t figure out.

studying his face to find clues, you found nothing but more questions. did he like someone else? did he like another girl? was this his way of coming out maybe? did he like no one at all?

“i imagined myself punching remus and sirius when they were all over you the other night.” he said.

your heart sank, and your only reaction was to stare and blink at him in disbelief for what felt like five straight minutes.

“what?” your voice barely made it out your mouth, in a whisper you weren't sure he’d heard. “it’s not funny, james.” you tried to laugh it off, but the scared look on your face betrayed you.

“no, it's not funny. it's not funny that since i've met you i've spent every one of our hangouts hoping for you to be there. and if you were, that i would find myself sitting by you so i can tell you stupid jokes that will make you look at me with pity, but then you'll laugh or smile at me. no, you’re right as always. it's not funny. ” he stood up, taking the plates off the table and taking them to the kitchen.

he came back and sat in front of you again. earning a blank stare from you.

“no.” you said, shaking your head.

he shot a smile at you, making you smile in return. you crossed your arms and looked at him, raising your eyebrows, signaling him to continue.

“i haven’t liked lily for a while now. almost two years ago, she and i became strictly platonic friends. well, i always was that to her.” he wouldn't air out lily. besides, the years of rejection had humbled him enough already.

“and when i met you, something clicked in my brain and i’ve been denying it because it was easier. it was easier for me to love someone who didn't care to love me back than to love you, 'cause merlin knows your ability to love everyone goes above and beyond.”

the coping mechanism part of your brain almost made you blurt out an im sorry, why are you so sure that i love you back like that? but remus had probably already taken care of that part in one of his weekly desperation rants about how stubborn and stupid you were being, and seeing james' side of the story you were sure he had gotten at least twice of those.

“so… we’ve wasted like a year because you’re a coward?” you joked, without being able to help it, you loved teasing him as much as everyone else.

“excuse me? you could have done something too!” he answered, pointing at you.

“no, i'm not the one from the house with the trait of being brave and courageous.” you rolled your eyes in fake annoyance, sighing.

he walked towards you and grabbed your face in his hands, smiling at the sight of your face so close to him.

“i apologize, maybe we should start making it up for the last year now.” james answered, leaving a soft and short kiss on your lips.

now you had to get ready for when your friends found out and started annoying both of you for at least one more year.