#but like if they dont i should be getting ready now
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💔; crimson pain -a different kind of blood
content warning: gn!reader who plays as number 028. (dating) angst. mentions of death, financial struggles, vomit, blood and fainting.
word count: 1935. i got a bit too carried away 😬
author’s note: finally, here it is. i’ve had this idea for so long but the universe wasn’t on my side, it seems. i really wanted to post it sooner 🥲. as always, constructive criticism is welcomed, and i apologize for the mistakes (english is my third language). oh, and tysm for the support on the jun-ho headcanons post! what do you mean over 1000 likes? that is insane 🤧🤧. i hope you’ll enjoy this one too. 🩷🩷🩷🩷
the sugary umbrella lays on your shaky hand, under the excruciating yet unmasked gaze of the soldier. once the ‘pass’ is given, you stand up ready to get out of there. “you made it!” the voice of the one that has become the closest thing to a friend you could have in here relaxes you ever so slightly. “i almost didn’t. can’t believe i’m adding umbrellas to my traumas list.” having chosen the hardest doesn't surprise you much, not with unluckiness being a part of your life since you can remember. “well, im just happy you did. i thought the square was simple, but now i feel like we should have just chosen the triangle instead, you know? take a look at the survivors; most of them chose it and….” his words fade as an eerie feeling takes over your body, like something’s wrong. turning around, you’re met with one of them, staring right at you completely stiff, not even holding the weapon, merely some feet away.
“is he looking at us?” he can sense the uneasiness too, it seems. “let’s just go.” you can still feel his unfamiliar gaze on your neck, sending a shiver down your spine.
the doors opening break the silence and the rare calmness of the room. “player 028?” your body freezes completely. a stomach drop follows, and your heart rate skyrockets. no. nonono. you’ve done nothing wrong. is it the dalgona? the figure was perfectly carved out; you made sure of it. are they gonna kill you? two soldiers stand by the entrance, waiting. with a final glance at your friend, who is most definitely thinking the same, you reach the pink guards. you don’t even know what to say, should you beg for mercy? try to stay as cooperative as possible? “be quick.” what? the other one grabs your arm and begins to lead you somewhere. “i-i don’t-” your hands are shaking. “please, i didn’t do anything wrong...” begging it is. “keep. walking.” the words are almost a whisper, tho demanding. a hint of desperation can be heard as well. “okay, okay, ok-” wait. why did those words- no. you’re going crazy. it’s just the anxiety, the fear.
the stranger takes you to the bathrooms and quickly closes the door. you step back. again. and once more. what now? he wouldn’t shoot you here, right? and why the hell does he look so tense? his hands move to his mask and make it disappear, and with it, the remaining bit of sanity you had.
the nausea from a few seconds ago comes back stronger, maybe you will die today. “jun-ho…” your voice is almost unrecognizable, tho a miracle, given the struggle breathing has become. “what are you doing here?” “i could ask you the same thing.” he’s angry, of course he is, but the hurt in his eyes pains you the most. “no….you need to get out of here.” god. you can feel yourself spiraling. nothing makes sense. “i will. and im taking you with me.” “h-how- when did- i-“ cold sweat has completely taken over your palms. “wait….wait. was it you?…. this morning?” he nods. “i found the damn card they gave you at yours and my brother’s house” what? “in-ho…?” why does everything keep getting worse? “have you seen him?” surely you would remember something like that, “n-no. maybe before the first game…..” you heed your legs’ warning to give up and sit down. “why are you doing this? i dont understand.” it’s not like he could. “they let you out. and you didn’t seek me. you hid yourself. again. i had to learn what was going on from a random man at the station. not you!!” silence between you had never felt this suffocating before, nor the atmosphere so uncanny. “don’t you realize how dangerous this is? they are killing innocent people! haven’t you realized?! 79 have died today. just because of a stupid cookie? what do you think you are doing?! you could have gotten yourself killed! you have no idea how worried i’ve been.” you don’t look at him. this shouldn’t be happening, he wasn’t supposed to find out.
“please, honey. this is insane and you know it. let’s get out of this madness.” the change in his tone of voice is evident, bordering the plea. it’s obvious he’s making an effort to remain calm, to use less confrontational comments. “i can’t.” “yes, you can. we’ll leave the same way i got here, don’t worry. no one will see us.” but you really can’t. you know that well. he sighs, “why didnt you tell me? how could you hide something like this from me? i thought we trusted each other.”
distress seems to have replaced the blood running through your veins. “i would have helped you, always. i can still do it. if you need money, i’ll give it to you, it’s not a problem.” he keeps going after your negative. “i will. we can find another way-” “there isn't.” “of course there is. i have my savings, we’ll use them. i can ask for a raise. mr kim owes me after all this time. and i could do more hours-”
“its not FUCKING ENOUGH!” the sharpness of your words cuts all over his face. pain flows out, dripping a bloody red. more silence. you could drown in it. well, in for a penny, in for a pound.
“my parents’ house is gonna get seized.” a burning throat accompanies the confession. “i messed up like crazy.” the expected embarrassment doesn’t show up, instead, regret does. “it’s not your fault.” how can he say that? “it is. i got them into this, I'll get them out.” “and you think risking your life here is the only way to do it? thats not true. god, why didn’t you tell me?” you rub your temple. “that doesn’t matter now. you-you need to get out, all this is suspicious.” you are not only trying to avoid the question, the guards could notice at any moment. “i told them you were gonna throw up.” “vomit or not you’re still in the bathroom with a player.” for some seconds, the only noise that can be heard is the shatter of your heart. “honey, listen to me. your parents wouldn’t want this. they don’t even blame you, im sure. how could they ever wish for something at the expense of their daughter’s life?” but the guilt is too heavy, too imprinted on your mind. “it’s not about me. if it were my house, i wouldn’t care, but it’s theirs. i would never forgive myself for not doing anything.” “and there are so many things you could do that don’t need you participating in some psychopaths’ games! do you really not see how dangerous and demented this is? please leave with me.” “jun-ho. think about it. if i ended up here, even after they gave us a second chance, it’s because i want to. no one forced me, and i’m old enough to know what i’m doing.” your replies are getting colder, which you hate. but it’s the only way to make him understand. “besides, they’re all kids' games. they’re easy.” you can only hope he won’t sense your attempt at self-persuasion. “they are shooting people. you could be dead. and i would have never seen you again, or known what had happened.” the urge to cry gets stronger with every word, to dive into his arms and finally feel some sort of calmness, warmth, love.
“i’m sorry that i hurt you, that i made you worry and feel like i couldn’t trust you. but i won’t apologize for being here.” “i don’t want you to apologize. i only want you to get out of here and not die.” his desperation has increased so much it’s swallowed your own distress. “i’ve already won two, i can make it to the end.” you refute. but you read him easily, he is planning to get you out without your agreement, somehow.
“please.” now it’s you that pleads. “if you love me, let me stay.”
his eyes widen, you see them watering. his heartbreak drowns out yours. you are aware you’ve never said anything as painful before. it hurts. more than anything they could do to you here. perhaps you are already dead. “how can you ask me something like this?” maybe you’re desperate, or too blinded by the blame that’s rotting on your insides. or perhaps it’s love. “get out of here. stay safe. and don’t tell the police, jun-ho. don’t even think about stopping the games. i need this, don’t ruin it.” god you don’t recognize yourself anymore. how nice it would be to go back when things were easy. when remorse didn’t control yourself, and you were happy with him. “what do you expect me to do if you die?” “i won’t” “you can’t know that! how can i let the love of my life risk it all when i know i could do something?” understanding such perspective is effortless. if it were the other way around, you too would act like he is.
you approach him for the first time, god how you craved it. your hands cup his pained yet beautiful face and a tear drops. “i missed you.” he says quietly, unable to stay angry at you for long. “i missed you too.” you answer back, wiping the tear. “i missed your face, your voice, your touch. i miss your kisses.” things already ache enough like this, so you give in. the kiss is soft, so fragile, like a bit more intensity would make it disappear. “i love you.” he whispers resting his forehead on yours. “i love you too.”
a knock on the door destroys the illusion. shit. “lay on the floor.” “what?” “lay on the floor”, he repeats, walking towards the door while putting his mask back on, “and play along.” the door opens and the same voice from earlier speaks. “what do you think you’re doing in there?” may that unluckiness give you a rest for some minutes. “she passed out. she was taking too long and not answering back so i entered and found her unconscious.” footsteps grow louder. “player 028…. i don’t remember any health issues on the file… fuck.” you stay as still as possible, it sounds plausible, given the stress. “take care of it, i’ll let the boss know. and don’t take longer.” with that, he exits the room, and you thank his unwillingness to deal with sensitive issues.
sitting back up, jun-ho kneels to your level. “you look good for a faint.” a hint of a smile appears on your face. “are you mad at me?” “i was. mostly worried. i don’t like this at all.” you grab his gloved hands. “i’ll be okay, believe me.” he doesn’t. he can’t. “please, be careful. and think about it. if you change your mind, i’ll be waiting.” you won’t. you wouldn’t let yourself. but you nod. “you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. i hope you’ll carry that with you. i love you so damn much.” his voice breaks, and you tell yourself it’s time to go back, this conversation can only get more and more devastating for you both. you offer the bleeding and broken pieces of your heart. not meaning to cut him this time. and he takes them. how could he not treasure them? you kiss again. it tastes different this time. like farewell.
and when you get out of the room, you both know that was the last time you’ll see each other.
#Spotify#squid game#squid game 2#wi ha joon#wi ha joon x reader#wi ha joon x you#hwang jun ho#hwang jun ho x you#hwang jun ho x reader#squid game x reader#squid game x you#squid game x y/n#wi ha joon x yn#hwang jun ho x yn#hwang jun ho headcanons#wi ha joon headcanons
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Am I Okay? Chapter Three
a/n: hi again! if you havent guessed already this chapter is going to include the gala i mentioned in part twelve! (which is linked) now as author im going to state clearly that this is not their first date 'canonically', however, its what i MYSELF consider their first date. <3
warnings: i dont think there are any, but i did add a little somethin somethin at the end ;) and i should mention this ones gonna be in rafes pov ;) im in no way saying that rafe is my character
word count: 1241
this shouldnt feel as daunting as it does right now. shes just a friend. its just a dinner party, theres no commitments attached or technicalities to worry over.
its just me and her making a boring evening more exciting.
thats all.
i knock on the door and wait patiently for her to answer. i did come a bit early so i wouldnt be surprised if she was still getting ready.
she has a tendency to get swept up in the music shes listening to when shes at her vanity.
but as soon as she opens that door and i turn to see her... i suddenly forget all the convincing was doing.
cause i know after tonight theres gonna be no more hiding just how into her i am. she looks incredible.
it does something to me knowing its the dress i bought her.
"hi," thats all she says and i swear i forgot how to breathe. how does she do this to me?
"hey," my smile widens, "you look... gorgeous. really you look great."
"cant take all the credit, the dress was all your doing. im just wearing it."
"and you wear it beautifully," just like that, a natural blush replaces the artificial pink on her cheeks "we should get going, are you ready or do you need more time? i can wait."
"i think im ready..." she searches through her purse, going over its contents making sure she has everything. "yep, im ready."
"perfect," i close the door behind her as she walks out, "its a little jarring to see you without your boots."
she chuckles as i open the car door for her, "i tried to clean up as nice as i could."
"you clean up just fine cowgirl," i cant hide my smile.
the drive to the event was that comfortable kind of quiet. i always let her take aux when we drive together. country music definitely isnt my favorite but she could play a lot worse.
besides she throws in the occasional kid cudi or metro boomin for me.
shes thoughtful like that.
"oh theres valet? how fancy," the valet opens her door for her before i can even get out of the car. i suppose thats his job.
"thats kinda how these things go. theyre a bit much."
"well i think its refreshing being so spoiled. dads done a lot of fancy business but nothing like this. its fun."
taking her hand, i lead her up the stairs into the building, "ill spoil you as much as you want cowgirl."
"youre such a sweet talker city boy. for someone who, supposedly, is a serial bachelor youre a total flirt."
"nah, i only flirt with you," i tell her, truthfully. part of me said it to see her all flustered but really there isnt a point in lying about it.
i know everyones got me figured out already, the guys and their girls are better gossipers than the real housewives. not that id know anything about the real housewives. i definitely dont watch that shit.
"thats exactly what im talking about," shes giggling as we walk into the giant room filled to the brim with investors, partners, staff, clients, a bunch of people i really want to avoid. i was about to lead her over to the bar when we run into someone conveniently.
her father. that i work with. awesome.
"cameron! thought i wouldnt be able to catch you tonig- y/n? pumpkin what are you doing here?"
"dad! were in public can you maybe not call me that-"
i let a smile peak through, "pumpkin?" its just too easy to tease her.
"rafe," she sends me a warning, and you know she means business when she uses my "government name" as she likes to call it.
i throw my hands up in defense jokingly.
"its good to see you y/l/n," i reach out to shake her dads hand, "i invited her, hoping a friendly face would make the night more barrable. i hope thats alright with you."
"nah its good for her. she needs to get out more. i trust youll take care of her."
"dad!" she raises her tone while keeping a hushed voice, "dont talk about me like im not here. please."
"you kids have fun tonight," her dad wraps an arm around her before pressing a small kiss to her temple before shaking my hand again, "good to see you rafe. take care of my little girl."
i nod with a smile as he walks away, heading over to a table of some other clients i recognize.
"unbelievable! rafe im so sorry that was embarrassing. he doesnt know how to act normal. i shouldnt let him out of the house. i need to put him in a home."
"cowgirl, youre rambling. its fine, i get it. hes a dad its his job to embarrass you a little."
she rolls her eyes leading the way back to the bar like we intended in the first place. leaning against the bar she tells the bartender her order and mine, already knowing id like a whiskey.
how am i not supposed to like this girl so much when she knows me so well? i dont care if we come from two completely different backgrounds. a part of me knows this is the girl for me.
taking our drinks i lead her over to our table for the night, pulling out her seat for her to sit when suddenly i see some investors walking my way.
i knew id have to work a little tonight but it doesnt stop me being disappointed from being pulled away from her.
the night goes on, i introduce her to a few of the people i know better than others, but i give her the chance to mingle when she wants too. shes so well spoken and holds her own well.
shes mesmerizing.
at one point i return from the restroom, and when i come back i see that after i stepped away one of the investors sons is making conversation with her.
hes far too close to her for my liking, touching her arm subtly, desperately trying to make her laugh. but i can see shes only doing it to be polite.
i step up right beside her, my hand naturally falling to the small of her back. innocently of course.
"jared! good to see you man, your dad let you come?"
theres nothing i love to see more than his confidence faulter. he needed to be put in his place, what can i say?
im just happy i was the one to get to do it.
"yea... yea he did. it was good seeing you rafe. nice meeting you...?" he smiled in her direction, asking for one more chance silently, i couldnt contain my laughter.
"have a nice night jared. tell your dad ill see him at mondays meeting," and with that i lead her away in the direction of our table.
"you didnt have to be so rude to him you know?"
"cowgirl, that was hardly rude of me. i was doing him a favor."
she plasters on an offended face, pretending to clutch her pearls, "how dare you, im a catch. hed be so lucky to have me, and so would you."
god, shes such a tease.
believe me gorgeous. i know id be so lucky to have you. its all i think about.
[ masterlist ]
#rafe cameron ruin me challenge#rafe cameron smau#rafe cameron fanfiction#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe outer banks#my writing <3
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i keep!!! getting rallied into going out!! and then the other person bails!! like i was not even upset about staying in tonight until i drank a fuckin coffee to keep me up for the rave that STARTS at midnight i would be tired too if i didnt RALLY like the soldier i am!! i like want to go but i rlly dont want to go aloneee i love this i love this i love this lololol
#i texted other ppl too to see if anyone else would wanna go and have not heard anything#they r probably asleep lol#and like idek if the person is fully canceling yet but im assuming so bc theyre not responding and said they’re tired#but like if they dont i should be getting ready now#im so#in limbo#i hate waiting to know what im going to do#i just end up frozen in place until i hear back like an npc#bb vents#deardiary
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ok yuri is starting to just be a prick
#im sorry yuri stans#hes an asshole#i fucking hate him#does he actually have fans#ive only ever seen yuri hate#as it should be#cus i seriously cant imagine liking this fucker#sxf#spy x family#btw i just finished chapter 89#so dont fault me if he turns out to be an angel#right now i hate him#yuri briar#spy x family yuri#Btw all of this is /j#I couldn't care less who ppl like#He's just kinda irrelevant to me#The sister obsession thing is my biggest problem but i get why they added it#To be honest if he got some actual character development might like him#My biggest problem with him is that he says he works for justice but in the end he's ready to hyper focus on some random dude and lock him#Up in jail only for committing the sin of marrying his sister
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my sweet little baby man is no longer with us
#he had his bloodwork done yesterday and the vet said it was fine but he doesnt have much time left#and my bestie is a vet tech who wanted to see the lab results bc she always does and she looked at them#and asked me if she can shiw them to her boss today and i was like sure and immediately knew something was up#today keekki was being himself#then i went to run some errands and when i came back he was laying in front of the front door with his tiny baby head against it#and i was like ''oh ok one of his seizures?''#and theyre like. keekki will drool and not move and they usually last for like 20 minutes (several vets have no idea whats up with those#but it was probably either a kidney or a blood pressure thing)#anyways. it did not pass in 20 minutes so i Knew#i laid on the floor next to him#then my bff sent me a message asking me if i have the time to talk about keekki and its not good news#at this point i was about to call the vet anyways#and she was like ''ok i showed these to my boss (a vet) and she got super angry that ur vet even let you leave the clinic''#bc apparently keekkis bloodwork was so bad he should have been put down then and there but my vet was like a fresh half graduate#so i dont hold it against her. anyways i got an euthanasia appointment for this evening and spent the time before it laying on the couch#crying with keekki in my arms#i had to carry him bc he couldnt really walk without stumbling and falling down#when i had to get up to get his carrier and stuff ready he was taking a nap on the couch where i left him and i took this pic#anyways worst vet visit of my life i could hardly even do anything but nod half the time bc speaking results in me sobbing#anyways. this fucking sucks#i dont know how ill be able to sleep tonight#its been years since i last slept at home without having a little guy plop into my arms#i spent a long time with him in the vet room when he was gone#it feels surreal ive given him his last ever forehead kisses#as i left the room i told him bye the exact same way ive been saying bye to him for the last very many years ive had him#its always moikka keekki before i go to work or the store or literally anything#and that was my last moikka keekki#i hope he felt how loved he was#my dad is sending me older pics of me and keekki and he looks so happy in them. hes always right next to me#idk man im going to stop rambling now
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@fushiglow hmm….wonder who i’d draw this for all of a sudden and why… 🤔🤔
#your reblog surprised me#THREE BUNS SUGURU (STAR WARS ER JUST FOR YOU!)#theyre covering riko or smt and smuggling her places (??)#drawing this i was like ‘oh suguru’s curses in a star wars environment should be robots and stuff#so this suguru is a mecanic (he makes them from scrappy parts people have thrown out#and trash materials (and hard work 😎)#diy pokemon#because what is the cursed energy people are letting out if not junk theyre letting go of#so yeah ; basic geto takes shit and turns it useful#i do realise thats already very generic for star wars (junk robots junk robots!) but like. yknow. this guy takes shit people wouldnt bother#trying to sell. miam. junk of the junk. geto my favourite recycling bin you were designed for a luxurious lifestyle clearly (gege not me!)#(and stuff…………. but im lazy to put my vision in words rn hah..)#gojo’s probably a princess#(let’s not lie. hes basically a prince already (clan heir is a different look on him))#this made me want to write ?.??#problem is i dont remember much about star wars (watched it as a kid (we have the cds) appart from the very basic storyline… i forgot 😔#then theres the jawa’s first appearance cuz for some reason they scared me and i am marked for life (THEYRE JUST SILLY LITTLE GUYS 😭😭))#thankfully i lowkey want to rewatch everything so these issues can be fixed#(unthankfully either way the chance of me writing anything is very slim BUT WE NEVER KNOW RIGHT)#(hashtag diverging your attention from that other older post is it working /j/j)#omg glo i still didnt read balance (i think of it from time to time but im intimidated to read it because i know its right up my alley and#that i will love it and lately idk why but i need to ready myself emotionally to read peak fiction (this is so dumb but its true 😭😭))#my bad im rambling lol#WAIT FUCK SAME THING FOR BUNNY’S RECENT THINGY THAT GOT IN MY AO3 UPDATE MAIL#A LOVE STORY TOLD THROUGH THE LENS OF A THIRD PARTY MY BELOVED#(itsg ive searchef for these types of stories in advanced search before#AND NOW THAT I HAVE SOME BY AUTHORS I ALREADY ADORE .. IM- I SEE THEM BUT. THEIR CONTENTS STAY A MYSTERY. IS THIS MY BODY SUBCONSCIOUSLY FI#FIGHTING THE TEAR LOSS I WOULD GET??? IS THIS MFING [BALLING-MY-EYES-OUT] PREVENTION !? WITHOUT MY PERMISSION..!? TCH!)#my bad. ramble again o7 — see ya glo !#wip
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:c
#the dieting chat has already started frm my mum#im ready to go home now#like i had one biscuit why are u telling me i should be watching what i eat cause i'll get fat#n she questions why i ever had an eating disorder#n shes asking what diet i'm starting next year??? like no none of them???? i dont want to lose weight????#leave me alone w that i beg#one more day one more i can do it
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if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.
#i cant let go of it. i cant even enjoy good moments without thinking about how they'll just be memories one day#how they're already memories since moments pass so fast#everything is I'll Miss This and i already miss it and i cant believe once you're gone you're gone forever#and ill never ever see you again. and your shell is in the ground but where did the rest of you go?#should i look at your body one last time? on one hand itll be the last time i see you.#on the other hand it will be the last time i see you.#and the memory of you will die with me too. as if neither ever existed#it impacts me so much too bc i dont feel close to anybody really...and i dont make friends easily#so whats going to happen when the people who have always been there arent there anymore?#im going to be alone for so much of my life.#i will record your voice so im ready for when i cant hear it from the source while also knowing it wont be enough and one day#ill be wishing it lasted longer. it could be 12 hours long and ill want more.#how do you surpass this? it hasn't even happened. when it happens i don't know what ill do. considering my whole life has been#the timer. the countdown. hours and hours of anticipatory grief#and then ill be next. me. some of all thats left of you. it cant be true.#sorry. this gets worse every single year and its been going insane lately#id surprisingly been managing it well for months somehow ! it wouldnt cross my mind...and now its there again#like it accumulated and its all coming out right now. ive been crying for hrs tonight and last night#one day his things will just be things. things ive made and given him will be in my hands again.#talkys#i want to go hug my dad but then ill just cry over how one day i wont be able to....! how do i store it? how do i save it?#how do i preserve it forever....even as i take my own last breath....#i cant believe im the only one of me. and my dad is the only one of him.#i wouldnt want to be reborn as anyone else. i cant believe one day i wont get to draw or eat or be comfy in bed anymore.#i cant take it !! im so scared. ill be scared until the end. and you wont be there to hold my hand. im going to be alone.#and none of those years of grief and joy and memories will matter.#i wonder if it would help to tell him about this. i need something to hold onto for when it happens. anything. but i also know it'll make i#hurt more; obviously. just another piece of him that'll be gone one day
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If I could make a minecraft mod I'd make one called "hold on!" Where when you open the inventory on single player you pause the game, like when you press escape.
I think this would help slower players (me) reorganise their inventory while in high stress situations, allowing for a slower approach to gameplay and a chance to cool down and strategise
#minecraft#mineblr#if someone did make this that would be. very useful#i dont know how ;w;#but tbh i think it could also be considered an assessibility feature#like yeah the options screen exists but that pulls you out of the game#you cant DO anything except bear your teeth and wait until u feel ready to continue#like just now i was in a fight with mobs and thought 'i should get my bow' but i knew that#with my bad reflexes and gameplay I wouldnt be able to REACH my bow slot in my keyboard on mouse in time#i survived but i did feel a bit limited
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ARCANE EPISODE 7!!!!
MY GOD I WASNT READY FOR ANY OF THIS!!! WHAT WAS THAT!!!
Also ekko wallpaper I got with my fries lmao
#OH MY GOOOD!!!!!! POWDER AND EKKO!!! AND BENZOOOOOO#ITS LITERALLY WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN OMGG!!!!! POWDER LOOKS SO CUTE 😭😭😭😭 IM CRYING ALREADYYYY#VANDER WITH A BUN!! AND EVERYTHING IS SO FULL OF LIGHT!!! HER EYES!!! MYLO LOOKS SO RIDICULOUS AKDJSK THIS GIRLAAA#“where would you be without her” WELL BUDDY IF YOU KNEW HOW HE IS WITH HER!!! VI IS DEAD????? OR SHE WAS TAKEN FOR THE INCIDENT!!!#LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID JAYCE!!! MY GOD!!! THE GEMS KILLED VI SO THEY JUST COMPLETELY PROHIBITED THEM!!! JAYCE IS IN JAIL PROBABLY!!#the fact we are seeing exactly why jayce should be sorry about what he has done.... and we are seeing him suffer because of it... cinema 🚬#also mel fading into viktor.... also has he realised how she manipulated him in the beggining??? there is so much stuff...#jayce eating contaminated animals and his wound being infected with the arcane too..... is that what will push him....#omg.... ekko likes powder so much... he apologised by painting actual adult vi portraits where the fallen are in his universe 😭😭😭#“she looks so badass” if you knew... is he gonna ask her to help him make hextech.... that is so sick and twisted....#also jayce hurting his leg loke viktor and having to use a cane and brace.... damn and you know whats worse..... that ekko could be like#this with the jinx of his universe IF ISHA HADNT DIED!!! AND IT IS BEACUSE OF JAYCE!! AGAIN!!!!! THIS MAN!!!!!#the drawing with the anomaly and the two men and the inifite symbol... we get it... jayce and viktor forever intertwined by fate....#powder is sensing something is off.... omg time travel..... THE LIMIT IS FOUR SECONDS AFTER HEIMERDINGER EPXLODED ALDHAKSHSKSJSOJSOSLS#i dont want a time travel ending.... if its done for plot to an extent is okay but idk about solving it all.... it makes it feel worhtless#claggor looks so fine its not even funny..... i cant wait to see what everyone thinks. WHERE IS THE LITTLE LADY bc hes called little man 😭#and vander with arm tattoos.... why did they hipster fied him.... he looks younger somehow ajdhakj he went from taking care of 4 kids to 3!#SILCO!!!! AND HE DID TRY TO KILL HIM!! ALSJAKSKAK Ekko just laighing at it.... girl i would be pissed STROMAE??? OMG POWDER!!!!#I JUST REALIZED THE PINK IN HER HAIR IS FOR VI!! AND HER JACKET!! AND A DRESS LIKE HER MOTHER'S!! CRYING!!! FULL BODY CHILLS!!!#CAN WE JUST PRETEND LIKE ITS THE FIRST TIME!!! I GAVE UP ON YOU!!! WHAT HAPPENED BACK THEN I NEED TO KNOW!!! IM SOBBING!!! EKKO!!!!#NOOOOOOO THE ANOMALY NOOOOO!!!! HEIMERDINGER NOOOOO!!!! AND THATS JAYCE!!! IS THAT MAGE VIKTOR???? the monkeys......#the vi toy with the out love song machine.... my god i wasnt expecting any of this i need to breathe i am stil tearing up my god#what a fucking punch in the stomach christ i cant breathe right akdhsksso#the credits saying the deries has benefited from a spanish tax rebate in the canary islands??? you're welcome i guess lmao#animation production carried out there and has ben collaboration with the Spanish gov... alright another win for perro sanxe#talking tag#watching arcane#watching arcane season 2#watching this i dont think im ready for caitvi sex.... after reconciliation even like what will be of me.... now im scared#i am still scared bc idk what happened to jinx and vi and cait still... thats what worried me and boom!! ekko powder with the steel chair..
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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literally could not sleep last night. was too busy thinking about maximus,,,,
#i have like 4 ted talks about him always at the ready. i am never NOT thinking about maximus#thinking about him right now!#thinking about how his mental health is changed like every other comic. thinking about how royals and oafk have completely different#writing of whats going on w him despite being released at like the same time#thinking about how like horribly tragic it is that as SOON as theres beginnings of addressing it and helping him#he gets just. beaten to death by a loved one. and indefinitely removed from all comics. and its just like not acknowledged almost at all.#gotta get back to that doti rewrite. his death in canon makes me too sad i gotta switch it up#like he CAN die in a hypothetical Genocide Comic but i dont like how he did. he should have been a bigger player!!#maximus is at his best as a morally gray rather untrustworthy 'good' guy! he deserved to beat the shit out of vox with everyone else </3#maximus boltagon
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I think about that tiktok trend where you like paint your partners eye color on your nails or make a bracelet or something with the color a lot actually
#like its so cute honestly but sometimes i wonder how hard it would actually be to like find the right color match#maybe one day... but for now probably expect oc art with this trend in it maybe 💀#the thing about it too is i have like dark eyes and idk if ive ever seen like a dark brown nail polish. beads or thread yeah but ya#oh nvm i googled. it exists i just dont pay attention ig#OH you know what i can do... i can paint pepperonis eye color on my nails.... my baby... my kitty......#dude it feels like 5 am why is it only 2#amyways. 4 monsters was a big mistake i think... i feel quite icky...#it doesnt help i didnt eat for a majority of the day it was just monster. im really unhealthy. need water maybe#wait i was talking about nail polish how did i get here#i just want to actually do cute couple things. i must heal. im gonna be so healthy.#its fine. lmao. i just know im not ready#oh i did eat btw dont worry lmao i had. chicken nuggets#i actually have to eat more bc i need to gain back some weight or they wont let me donate plasma#my extra pokemon money..... nawr...#i dropped like 10 pounds. my current job is very physical. lots of scuttling around.#i thought about working out too? i had a short phase last year in like spring or something where i started doing workout type stuff#so like.. maybe. probably should. healtly mindset shit yk#i also maybe want some more clothes. like update my wardrobe a bit. really figure out my style.#like some cool shirts and maybe pants. cause i wear a lot of the same stuff#also again. dropped weight so. need better fitting pants.....#i want more mens pants. big pockets... gender....#anyways. nice chatting with you besties. love you guys my silly little tumblr besties.#some of you that follow this sideblog have supported me on here for a while. i see you. i appreciate you. thank you 💖#genuinely there are names that pop up and im like !! hello!!! its you!!!!!#you guys probably know who you are. go get yourself a little treat you deserve it. or like. idk what you enjoy.#play a good game. watch your favorite show. idk. be happy. love yourself.#this also goes out to those of you who are more passive on my blog. i appreciate you too!! thank you!#all my little tumblr followers.... my besties..... unles you are a bot i havent cleared out lmao#k i might have to go to bed idk im tired well see
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for the first time in my life i was just asked if i have kids instead of if i'm in college yet. the years start coming and they don't stop coming huh
#stooooop#i know i have been old enough to have kids for a while but 😵💫#im always behind on all the milestones in life tho but it never stood out before bc people always thought i was 17#literally from when i was 13 until very recently people always guessed i was like 16-19#which was great bc i am an autistic late bloomer who lives w my parents and sucks at being an adult#so giving off the vibe and appearance of being a teenager was fine#but now i look like an adult#🧍♀️🧍♀️🧍♀️#yet i am not good enough at being one for these questions and assumptions 😭#i hate it hereee#anyway weird old guy at the store started telling dumb blonde jokes then asked me if i had kids#never in my life have i been asked that#late twenties fr the worst age bc u still feel young but start getting treated old and also u don't have ur shit and life together yet#but everyone thinks you do or should by now#alas#irl i'm 27 what am i a child bride moment#not that having kids is for old people#but im not even good at being responsible for myself yet let alone an entire baby#i do want kids but im not ready for that yet#also never been in love 🫠#or even seriously dated anyone ever#not that it's a requirement#in fact im planning to adopt esp if i dont get married but still#anyway i do very much want kids im just not in that place yet#and didnt feel that behind in life about it bc nobody ever asked me that before#thsi better not be like how everyone asks you as soon as they meet u about ur job or school i dont need to be fielding this forever
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if he DOES manage to visit in a few months im gonna need SO much help picking out outfits. n lingerie. or is that too much
#🍯#my shark#like if i wore a cute top and skirt but had lingerie underneath#is that too much. is that too expectant#and how much is too much#maybe i should get a new set just for her#and god what about toys#is it weird to have toys ready#god we dont have a strap. but also how far would we be going#iiiii am the overthinker#i just wanna start planning now so it feels real#there ARE some things i DO already know#such as lipstick. i wanna wear lipstick so i can leave marks#i wanna be the femme* of their dreams#(i wouldnt consider myself a femme but i am creeping closer and closer every day)
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preemptively sorry for how fucking long this is it is YOUR FAULTT THOUGH!!!! large bowl of seeds for u. it is almost 2am sorry.
SO. there are. two ways to assign the prime defenders powers etc. the first way is just, like, categorize their existing powersets within the prt framework, & the second is to give them entirely new abilities based on the way worm works. delightfully, all the powers they Do have work really well for the most part, so even that doesn't require a ton of shuffling.
categorizing their pre-existing powers:
wiwi-- breaker w/ a shaker subclass. neither of them rated very high, but that's already a rare and versatile enough combination!!
dakota-- brute babeeeey!!! brute/mover its so straightforward. hell yeah babey. i don't know what he'll end up looking like post-heart removal & stuff but my guess is that'll end up looking more like a mover/striker.
vyncent-- now THIS one gave me trouble. i... hm. to say this without talking about stuff that i don't think has come up much already, (hey!! you're at that clockblocker pov! directly related to what flechette says!) i'd call him a grab-bag cape, irt the greats at least. post-greats-- again, i don't know what his powerset will look like after this arc! but if he's going all in w/ the fire magic, that would for sure be some striker shit! :]]]
giving them new powers... man i'm reining myself in so hard from five more paragraphs on Why exactly i'm saying all this.
wiwi still breaker for sure, maybe breaker-master, maybe master-stranger. yknow. powers are fluid, the prt categories are pretty rigid. i... don't know. enough about his situation yet to be clearer than that vague idea yet-- i really like the idea of him just. ditching his body & using a noncorporeal form but he still has to keep an eye on his body i think that's great. the noncorporeal form would b able to change its visibility but still b limited by proximity to the body. & fluctuating energy shit powered by fluctuating amounts of recent-death in the area, maybe probably also limited in that it's only accessible in his breaker form.... also i think u will appreciate this style note from the [UNNAMED PARAHUMANS TTRPG] i'm referencing a lot here.
dakota--in this situation he probably would not. have that mechanical heart and shit. he' would still be a mover/thinker-- thinker rating is for faster mental processing + senses imminent pain for the people in his immediate vicinity. not danger, just pain; it immediately registers ambiently & can be generally traced back to whoever it is. no he can't turn it off ever, it manifests as feeling a similar level of pain, yes it works on himself. + mover-- he can fucking fly. no super strength, just very fast flight & the general "won't splat himself flying into something" capabilities, which meshes well w/ the faster processing & reflexes. i'm split on how exactly this would work mechanically but i will NOT go into that now. i am also not going into the 15k discussion in my brain on why dakota 'notoriously bad at thinking about things' cole would be a thinker but u gotta trust the process ok??
vyncent-- trump!!!! somehow this is the only straightforward one to me? he can copy powers at the full strength or ability level of the original for an unspecified amount of time that's usually 1-30 minutes by touching the cape. crucially, he doesn't have any edge on how to use these powers + can easily misuse or become extremely overwhelmed by them. he's easily the most powerful out of the three of them <33
ashe-- ashe is NOT HERE currently and also it's 1:30 am so i gotta go fucking sleep soon BUT they would be a master. easy. :o) they can make some lil guys n do stuff with them!!!!
in general these are pretty fucking cracked abilities, all of them would b oosely above a seven or so in a number rating once they're really settled in their powers-- this is mostly because i'm assuming that they would still be heirs-apparent to the prime force equivalent, which would b the triumvirate :]] anyway. good lord. this is like the cliff notes edition of what i've been thinking and scribbling in the notes app for the past several hours. sorry if it's fucking incomprehensible. gn!!! <333
AAAAAH FUCK YESSSSSS OKAY OKAY OKAY my response is probably going to be equally as long. so it's fine. oooouh buddy.
I KNOW WHAT BREAKER MEANS NOW !!! I dontttt think ive learned shaker yet. breaker is like.... breaking the laws of physics/shifting planes or whatever. PERFECT for william hell yes. for putting them actually in worm world ... ughhhh breaker/master william is REALLY cool. I havwnt learned stranger yet but i think he would develop a complex over being classified as stranger <3 (like how weld doesn't like that he's classified as a brute even though that's not exactly what it means, he just doesn't like the word) . GODDDD just thinking abt putting pd boys in worm is fucking me up haven't they been through enough. I want to see them all in a fit of despair. william ditching his body is SO good I miss when he would do that, also the powers being limited by how far away he is AND THE AMOUNT OF RECENT DEATH IN THE AREA. holy shit. that's so fucking good . im sure he would not overthink at all the fact that he is stronger when more people around him have died . I'm sure he'd do awesome in the leviathan fight for sure for sure .
DAKOTA BRUTE <3 DAKOTA BRUTE/MOVER I LOVE THIS A LOTTTTTT hellbyes. awesome. it's so perfect for him <3 worm world I'm SURPRISED u didn't stick with brute for him. eyes emoji. I trust your judgement but now i am Thinking... Hmm..... YOU BRING INTO QUESTION something I have been thinking about. and I'm going to probably get derailed a little here but stay with me. how the way powers manifest directly relate to the trigger event. because for a WHILE before we learned taylors I was like "OH i bet the powers are going to be directly related to what traumatic thing happened to them" and then we learn about taylor and grue and a couple more and I kind of lost that theory because while you can. technically draw relations between their powers and their events it seemed like too much of a stretch to do . HOWEVER now my thinking has changed AGAIN and I think the powers ARE related to specific trigger events but it's not as straightforward as "oh something scary happened to you with bugs so now you have bug powers" I think it's gonna be more complicated than that. WHICH. THE WAY THIS RELATES. BACK ON TOPIC NOW. to DAKOTA . assuming his trigger event is still he and katori falling off the building I think it's AWESOME that his powers would manifest as FLIGHT for one. and the fucking. pain sense thing. fuck me up. dakota extreme hero complex cole would be so fucked up by a power where he ambiently senses pain from the people around him at all times and cannot turn it off. I'm sure he would feel so normal about being around william chronic pain wisp 24/7. also I can SO CLEARLY imagine how this power specifically would lead to him getting super overwhelmed in chaotic situations like he does in canon. and just fucking. bolt out of there because it's too much. again. he'd have such a wonderful time in the leviathan fight
I AM AT CLOCKBLOCKER POV !!!! actually technically I'm on kid win pov now but I haven't finished his chapter yet. vyncent grab bag cape..... yeah... I think it would be EXTREMELY funny imagining the PRT in pd world trying 2 classify vyncent like. what the fuck does this kid do . what do we do with him. hes got other guys in his head that give him powers. is he a master??? no he can't fucking control them. is he a striker??? only SOMETIMES. is he a blaster?? AGAIN ONLY SOMETIMES. cannot classify him bitch!!!!!!!! giving him worm powers though.. UGH. being able to touch someone and COMPLETELY copy their powers but only for a short period of time???? I fucking love that a lot. he WOULD be the most powerful out of them!!! I can hear taylors inner analysis dialogue about him now and it's very similar to the clockblocker "DONT LET HIM.TOUCH YOU" panic. loooove imagining this playing off of the rest of pd,,, i know there was AT LEAST one time where he had william sort of transfer some of his ghost powers for a minute? I think it was during the lich fight in the theatre but i just remember vycnent floating and going intangible and NOT KNOWING how to control it or anything. loveeee that. in world dynamics I feel like vyncent would be a late addition to their team (instead of coming from another world maybe he just. had his trigger event happen way later than the other two..or something.) and not trusting them as much at first/being REALLY shaky using either of their powers but after a while being really comfortable in a fight with using either Williams or dakotas powers in a fight. Just like. imagining the fluidity of how they'd work together in a tense situation assuming they're not being complete dumbasses <3333 UGH it's really good
AAAASHE ASHE ASHE IM SOOO SO GLAD YOU INCLUDED ASHE IN THIS I miss him.so much every day. from what I know so far master involves having/making/controlling some sort of minion (cannot think of a better word than that rn) AND I THINK THATS REALLYYYY perfect for ashe. i assume he would actually work pretty closely to canon in that his limitation would be the book? or if he doesn't have the book maybe his limitation would be a) having only a few different types of things he could summon (the big hand, the water fairy, duck etc) and/or b) only being able to control them.for a short amount of time after they're summoned so he has to be quick about dismissing them. can't keep the demon hand around for too long or it might start picking things up and throwing them at random. putting teammates in danger bc he can't control it anymore etc etc. alsooooooo in clockblocker pov they VERY briefly mentioned the possibility of having secondary trigger events (?!!!!?!?!) and you know I locked onto that SO FUCKING HARD. ashe being born with powers and then his secondary trigger event being his mom's death <3 im.NOT even going to attempt to talk about how the trickster would work in worm world/if it would even exist in this setting bc i don't know enough about the types of powers and things yet..but just know. I am keeping this in the back of my mind "this is a fun surprise tool that will help us later" style
#also side note but can i say. thw whole time i was reading the leviathan fight a persistent thought in the back of my mind was#“man i really wish they had a cape here who could control water- THEY NEED TIDE... THEY NEED TIDE SO BAD”#so like..really normal about putting prime defenders SPECIFICALLY in the leviathan fight. teehee (<< most diabolical laugh youve ever heard#I HAVE A LOT MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT WILLIAM TOO BUT..HMMMMMMMMM DONT THINK I CAN SAY SOME OD THEM YET#EXTREMELY interested 2 see whether ur thoughts on specifically him and dakota#will change after both the training arc and certain other events <3#hehehehehehehee#GOD I CANNOT STOP IMAGINING. PD IN WORM.WORLD. they would suffer so fucking badly man.#william wisp guilt complex about his powers turned up to 200#HAVING A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT ASHE ALSOOOOO . AS ALWAYS#now that i know more abt power classes i am VERY confidently going to put mark down as a tinker/striker.#with the tinker rating being SLIGHTLY higher than striker bc he uses the things he makes to amplify his naturally weaker striker powers.#tiiiiiide im thinkingggg would be. whats the elemental one.#not breaker bc thats specifically about breaking physics and i dont think that works for him.#is it shaker?????? i dknt think ive learned shaker yet.#U ARE MORE EQUIPPED AT THIS THAN ME whats tide. tide would also for sure be a case 53 right. i havent exactly learned what that means yet#but im assuming its the whole artifically giving people powers thing and. thats tide baby. idk if clones would work in worm world#so maybe its him and his regular siblings all being specifically given elemental powers#so they could work together as some super crazy powerful team. and then. that Doesnt happen <3#(idk if u have listened to the tide oneshot yet but. its good. if you ignore dodgeboy)#ANYWAY. i should start getting ready for work now. im having so many thoughts about this norlw#hollyyyyyy shit#infected my brain with worms (pun intended)#asks#friends!!!#intertexts#wormposting#jrwi pd#<< only tagging so i can find this later when i learn more and can properly yell about it#new haven wards
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