#but knowing there's a book- and actually having the book and reading it- has made me really really like him

[hitomisuzuya]

bully!yandere scaramouche x fem!reader. smut. cunnilingus. degradation. masochism. sexting (ish). blowjob. stalking. drugging/ use of marijuana and cigarettes. obsessive behavior from scara. mix of soft dom!scara and harsh!dom scara.

i was genuinely surprised how many people got excited for this🥺 i decided to split this into two parts cause it's really quite long.

you knew it was going to be a long afternoon the moment you left your dorm this morning. the moment scaramouche caught sight of you across campus. the last few months, scaramouche has been your bully.

"hey, nerd, you are a little late today," scaramouche bats your books out of your arms, "did you get lost on the way here?" the drink in your other hand was the next to go, batted out of your hand and landing face down on your books.

you stare down at the mess on the floor in front of you. you hate that there is a blush on your cheeks. you could do nothing but stare at the water bleeding onto your papers, swallowing your pounding heart in your throat.

scaramouche sighs, and flicks you in the forehead. "never mind," he pats you twice on your head, "i can see there is nothing going on up there. see you later, sucker. i don't have all day," he laughs at you, waving in passing.

"if you don't have all day, then what are you doing standing around picking on me?" you retort as you kneel to pick up your things. you simply pick up your things and head back to your dorm. you are pretty sure there was nothing major going on in your afternoon class.

you chose to hide away in your dorm for awhile. you flop down on your bed, turn on the tv and decide to see what your friend was up to. you met him online in the chat of a live streamer you both watch. later on through text, he told you could call him kuni and you've talked pretty much every day since.

'hey, what are you up to?'

back in his dorm, scaramouche had been waiting for your text. lately, you have been a lot more comfortable texting him. 'nothing much. i thought you are supposed to be in class this afternoon?' you have no idea it's him you have been talking to. you don't even know that it's someone at school.

it is a very good way for him to have you all to himself.

'nah, it's just a review today. i can safely skip. and this is going to sound so silly but...'

scaramouche eats it up when you trail off in your texts. that told him you are shy and flustered about something. he knows he has to be careful about how he words things when he talk to you. you might surely figure him out easily. 'what's up. is something on your mind?'

'don't laugh okay?'

'scout's honor. kinda seems like you have a lot on your mind. i don't mind listening, you know that,' you are quiet and shy, so he has to coax you little by little to get you to talk, but he likes to think he has gotten pretty good at it.

'actually, i do have a lot to say.'

scaramouche smirks, rolling the ball of his tongue piercing on the roof of his mouth. this was going to be good.

'well, he is selfish. arrogant. has no concept of personal space. he is academically lazy, but he is so so smart. all he does is poke, poke, poke. he never stops. i don't know why he picks on me, but i don't know how honest you want me to be about this?'

your praise about him being smart made his cock twitch. 'tell you what. i will put my down for two hours. not even look at it. you type to your heart's content and send the messages. when you are done, you can delete them. i won't even read them. sometimes, it helps to just get it off your chest and have that be that.'

of course he didn't do that. he kept his phone in his hand the whole time. honestly, he is completely unashamed about manipulating you like this. there is something rattling around in that pretty head of yours. there is no way he is going to pass this up. for extra encouragement, he texts, 'i'm putting my phone down now. just do your thing.'

back in your dorm, you couldn't help but smile a little. kuni really is a good friend. you feel nothing but secure talking to him about anything. so naturally, you just typed without thinking. he wasn't going to read it anyways, and you trust him. your fingers shook a little as you started typing.

'well, lately i am starting to enjoy when scaramouche bullies me. as wrong as it is to say, there is just something about that way he talks down to me. it just sounds so good. it's starting to make me really wet. that's why i had to skip class today.' not wanting the texts to be too long, you pressed send and started a new one, and just let yourself type.

'his arrogant confidence is infuriating, but at the same time, there is this commanding dominance in the tone of his voice. like all i could think about earlier was him bullying me down onto my knees, telling me it's okay to be a weak little slut and take his cock into my mouth like a good girl.'

"oh holy fuck, you little masochist," scaramouche whispers nearly dropping his phone reading your text. and you are typing still. he knew he couldn't say anything though, so he waits, his hand itching to reach down and stroke his cock.

'and i would gladly sink to my knees for him. i am blushing just thinking about it. i even want to play with myself, it's so hot to think about. it's making me really wet thinking about him degrading me while i choke on his cock. i want him to tell me it's okay to be weak. to not think and just focus on pleasing him because that's what i am ultimately good for. omg i am so sorry, please don't read this. thank you.'

scaramouche quickly took a screen shot before the messages disappeared. as much as he wants to find you and force you onto your knees exactly like you describe, he knew he wouldn't benefit him any. in fact, it would blow everything to hell. he reads your texts again, his hand fisting his hard cock, wishing the cum that spilled onto his hand was going into pretty your mouth instead.

over the next few weeks, scaramouche relentlessly bullied you, and you settle into something of a routine with kuni. once scaramouche was done with you, you would text kuni, spilling your racing thoughts into what you thought were blank text messages that you deleted unseen when are done.

'i can't thank you enough for always letting me do this, kuni. it's really helping a lot. if you ever need to vent in the same way, please do so. believe me, i can barely type these words. i didn't get much sleep last night. all i could think about was scaramouche tying me up, and degrading me for begging him to cum inside me while he fucks me senseless. i know i should stay away from him, but i can't help it.'

'he can never find out about this.'

you are effectively giving scaramouche all the tools he needs to corrupt you. you have no idea you are putting opportunities gift wrapped right into his lap. now, he could start sinking his claws into you.

you have no idea just how close he really is. there are only so many places you could go on campus. scaramouche knows your routine like the back of his hand. he has a few classes with you, and it's always easy for him to be in the right place, watching you while he bullshits with his friends.

usually, when you are out getting food or in between classes, you always text kuni, letting him know exactly what you are up to and where you are. you probably text kuni because being out around people makes you nervous.

'hey, kuni. i hope you have eaten today. i am grabbing some quick dinner right now. after, I'll probably go back to my room and watch tv or something.'

scaramouche looks right at you from across campus while you type. you are so painfully naive that it's adorable. you had no idea he's been following you the entire day, carefully blended in and unnoticed.

'hey, i just ate a little while ago. how was your day?' he texts back, immediately putting his phone in his pocket. you are defenseless and easy pickings right now. and he now knew you had nothing to do tonight. he is going to change that.

scaramouche waits until you get your food, and makes a beeline right for you as you leave the campus cafeteria. "so even nerds eat, i see," he trots up behind you, snatching your food out of your hand.

"will you please give that back? i didn't have breakfast earlier. i kind of..overslept," you reach for your food container, a blush dusting your cheeks as he holds your takeout box above his head.

"like i give a shit," he scoffs, watching your tits bounce as you jump to try reach for your container. smirking, he puts a hand on your chest and gently shoved you backwards. "what do nerds eat anyways?" he laughs, dancing away from you as he opens the container.

"what's it matter to you? you aren't eating it," you shyly try and reason with him while at the same time trying feebly to stand up for yourself. but you felt yourself getting weak in the knees like you always did. you could clock your body down to the minute it reacted it had become so routine for you.

"maybe i am hungry," scaramouche flips the lid closed, and walks away with your food. exactly like he thought, when he looks over his shoulder, he sees you coming after him. he revels in how much darker the blush on your cheeks got so fast.

"look, at least give me half if you want it that badly," you try several times to grab the container out of his hand, only for him to take it right out of your reach as he walks.

scaramouche laughs as he stops in front of his dorm. "nah, i don't share," he tosses your container into the trashcan next to his dorm room and opens the door. you wouldn't need that anyways. if he got his way, and he would, you wouldn't be leaving his dorm tonight. he can always get you something to eat later.

he is completely used to always getting what he wants.

you stare in disbelief at your food in the trash can. "i..i..why did you do that?" you swallow you pounding heart in your chest. it shouldn't feel this good to be bullied. you didn't think your cheeks could get any more red. the condescending tone he has sent a pleasant shiver right down to your clit.

sighing, scaramouche curls his fingers underneath your chin. "you should see the look on your face," he tilts your head up to look him. "yeah, that one right there," his hand caresses your cheek, his thumb lightly skimming across to your lower lip as you look at him.

"what do you mean?" it felt like a reflex for you to turn your cheek into his hand, the action happening before you knew it was. you long forgot about your food. the only thing you can do is focus on him. just looking up into his eyes flusters you.

"you look like you would get down on your knees and suck me off if i asked you to," it's infuriating how cute you look to him right now. your cheek was nuzzling slightly into his hand, much like a pet would.

clicking the ball of his tongue piercing on his teeth, scaramouche waits for your reaction. if you chose to walk away, he would let you. but he knew you wouldn't. whatever happens next is entirely up to you.

"what if i told you i would?" you shook a little as the words came tumbling out of your mouth. hearing his words reminds you of how wet you are. it took everything you had not to look away from him.

scaramouche froze for a moment, processing what you said. he honestly didn't expect you to be so straightforward. he thought he would have to bully it out of you. "c'mere," he takes his hand off your cheek, and grabs your wrist.

hastily, he pulls you into his dorm and shuts the door. "i'll bet you can't show me you are serious. weak nerds like you cave so easily," he scoffs, deciding to test you a little by putting his hand on your shoulder.

you shiver the moment he applies pressure, sinking to your knees if front of him. scaramouche's eyes widen for a moment as you look up at him. "i can prove it," you say, smiling softly at you nuzzle your cheek on his pelvis. "let me prove i can be a good girl for you." right now, in this moment, this is exactly where you want to be.

he grit his teeth looking down at you. "you know, you look adorable on your knees," he has spent so many nights with his hand fisting his cock, thinking about you in this exact position. looking up at him with utter adoration. fuck, it is making him hard.

you stay submissively quiet on your knees as he unbuttons his jeans. taking out his cock, he puts a hand on the back of your head. "open," he commands, tapping his index finger on his lips.

your eyes light up as you willingly open your mouth. his hand on the back of your head brings your mouth close to his leaking cock. he pokes the tip against your lips, smearing precum on them as he pushes it into your mouth.

your tongue flattens as you lick the slit, wrapping your hand around his cock. "fuck, i knew you were a weak slut," scaramouche hisses as your tongue glides wet on his cock head. his hand tightens in your hair, pushing your mouth onto his cock more, "be the good girl you promised you would be and suck."

you moan, opening your mouth to take his cock in. it pulses thick on your tongue as you suck. he groans as you gently grind the roof of your mouth on his cock. your clit throbs at his degradation, your panties clinging wetter between your legs.

he drinks in the look of adoration welling deeper in your eyes. it straight up makes him moan with pent up need. "that right, slut. keep sucking just like that," he holds your head in place, pumping his cock in and out of your mouth.

your pussy clenched hearing him degrade you so harshly. you muffle a moan on his cock, your sucks turning more eager as you stroke your fingers on the part that wasn't in your mouth. scaramouche rests his head against the wall, bobbing your mouth on his cock.

you rub your thighs together as drool pools out the corner of your mouth. you didn't need to think about anything other than pleasing him. your throat spasms around his cock as it suddenly hits the back of your throat.

"good girl, choking on my cock so well," he pushes hit into your throat again to feel the pure pleasure of it spasming pliable on his cock. you look so intoxicating right now, content to let him use your mouth to get off. the look in your eyes screams, please, enjoy me.

scaramouche has to bite back his whimper as his cock pulses in your mouth. "fuck, i am cumming," he mumbles as cum spurts warm and salty into your mouth. "swallow it all, whore," he groans, relaxing his hand on your hair and letting you suck him through his orgasm. his hand strokes through your hair until he pulls out of your mouth.

you obediently swallow, blushing as you saw a string of saliva connecting your tongue with his cock. sighing, he puts his cock back in his pants. it's so fucking sweet how you are looking up at him for some sort of guidance as to what to do next.

you really would look so pretty all collared up for him like the perfect pet.

"have you ever smoked pot before?" he asks, walking to grab a joint off his nightstand. he knew exactly what your answer would be. as he sits down, he pats the bed in signal for you to come sit with him.

"no, i haven't," you get to your feet, shyly making your way over to sit on his bed, "but i have been curious," you thought he would send you on your way once he got what he wanted. your heart is skipping beats in your chest at the thought of staying with him.

scaramouche spends the next few hours, shotgunning hits into your mouth while you watch him play video games. with each hit, his tongue devours your mouth, his lips needy on yours. he doesn't stop until your eyes look glazed over and hazy, and you are lying relaxed next to him on your stomach.

admittedly, he couldn't say he have an interior motive. as much as he wants his precious to relax, getting you high would make you more pliable for him. after a few hours of some conversation and smoking another joint, scaramouche turns off his game and rolls you over onto your back.

without a word, he captures your lips in a rough kiss. it strokes his ego how it takes no time at all for you to start moaning softly into his mouth as he devours yours with his tongue. his kisses turn more possessive as he takes your clothes off, carelessly tossing them on the floor.

he chuckles seeing the blush on your cheeks as he spreads your legs and slots himself between them. "why do you look so shy, hm?" his tongue dips between your folds, "you were sucking my cock like an eager slut a couple hours ago. it's cute, really," smirking, he licks stripes up and down your pussy.

your hips rock up to grind your pussy on his mouth. the wagging of his tongue piercing on your throbbing clit makes whimper tinged moans bubble up in your throat.

you don't know how much time passes as scaramouche tongue fucks your pussy until you start whimpering and moaning uncontrollably, his hands possessive and bruising on your hips as your hips they buck into his mouth.

you'd sucked him off so well. he has to reward you by returning the favor. as much as he wants to sink his cock inside of your tight, wet cunt right now, he knows just his tongue fucking into your hole will have to do. a delicate thing like you had to be corrupted slowly or you might shatter way too fast.

you passed right out shortly after cumming hard on his tongue, whimpering and shaking from the intensity of your orgasm. he keeps you tucked under his blanket, curled up against his side with your head resting on his chest.

"hey, are you awake?" he asks softly, tapping his index finger on your head. you didn't even stir, and he wasn't surprised. this had been your first smoke pot, and he had gotten you quite high before eating you out.

"don't worry, winter break is coming. everything will be okay then," he whispers, stroking his hand through your hair. you'd looked so fragile and delicate standing in the food court earlier. overwhelmed and tired. that if someone clapped at you the wrong way you would break.

life is full of loud and scary things. things that would break you. he couldn't have that. when winter break comes in a few weeks, he would make everything okay. before he went to sleep, he read a text that you'd sent a few days ago:

'i think i am really in love with my bully.'

[impish-baby]

which of your familial yandere’s do you think would best handle a moody teenager? I’m definitely a fan of the fics where the reader is cute and obedient but I never see much for the older agere’s 😭

This ask is so cute- apologies if I made teen regressor! reader too stereotypical, I just found it funny

Valerian: wants to be a cool parent so bad but they're old-

They do not care for most modern technology but they're sitting there with their reading glasses trying to google all the current lingo and what's hot with the kids these days, will definitely come up to you asking why your generation is into certain things (boomer but times 10,000, they've been alive centuries)

It's a good thing for you if you're into certain alternative fashions because Valerian's wardrobe is stocked full of choices for more goth or lolita looks! They never mind sharing, they're more than happy to have you giving their pieces another life (maybe will be a little miffed if you decide to use something for a DIY without asking first, but they get over it fairly quickly and immediately turn to fawning over your work)

Tentatively let's you go out to concerts and different things, with a chaperone of course! They will not hear any moaning over you being old enough to go by yourself, you're still their baby and need someone to make sure you're safe! (Don't think you'll make any friends though, for some reason everyone avoids you like the plague..)

Rowen: does not stop talking about when he was in a band in high school, you could like a totally different genre of music and he still chats about it because he's (admittedly poorly) trying to connect with you

He's dealt with two other kids before, so attitude problems are no stranger to him! He never takes anything personally, but will threaten to take your door if you keep slamming it (never actually does, he just finds it to be the most annoying part) I think he'd get you lots of journals and self help books just because he knows how difficult and large emotions can be at that age

Unfortunately, you're still not allowed to go anywhere unless you're willing to make it a family trip! None of his kids are allowed in town without him, and sneaking out isn't really an option when he (not to mention your siblings) can out pace you easily. You'll get locked up in the den for the effort though :p

Sylvia: She... does not do well with teen regressors (._.) She tries her best of course, but is very used to babies/toddlers

Her first thought when you're in a mood is that you're throwing a tantrum and she'll start to treat it as such, which does the opposite of helping because it just feels like she's making fun of you-

She messages her coven apologizing for her own teen years..

Eventually, figures out that things go smoother if she takes on more of a big sister role instead of a motherly one. Is very much into gossiping and watching TV together (still doesn't let you watch anything too 'inappropriate', she frowns anytime there's even a mild curse)

Thoren and Rune: *sniffles* they grow up so fast.. they're both sad about their fledgling deciding they're oh so mature and broody

Rune has a habit of mimicking you, annoyingly enough. The deep sighs, eye rolls, he finds it funny how much it bothers you (and despite your efforts, he can tell you also find it humorous sometimes, no feeling escapes the bond)

They mandate cuddling, not that they didn't before, it's just worse now that you act like you're too good for some snuggles from your sires! It doesn't matter how much you fuss about it, you're being dragged into the nest one way or another

My personal ranking for this group best to worst is: Rowen, Thoren and Rune, Valerian, and lastly Sylvia

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Raven…I always forget how much this confuses me but, i’ve gotta know what your opinion on this is. But do you think that besides their tails and ears,

Do the Savanaclaw boys have a full body coat of fur???

Like a full on pelt covering their legs arms face etc.???? Or do you think it’s just regular body hair?

Because in the Octavinelle book when Grim was complaining about how Leona said “No pets allowed in the dorm, they shed all over the place” he quipped back with “aren’t you guys like a billion times furrier than me!?” and i remember the first time I read that i genuinely couldn’t figure out if he was being serious or not, cause beast men are like half animal half human, idk what part of them are animal and what’s not!! 😭 besides what’s obvious.

but anyways, do you personally think the Savanaboys have a full coat of fur or nahh??

Oh, you’re talking about this interaction from 3-13?? I have also included (for reference) the equivalent scene from the Episode of Octavinelle manga. (The third volume of the light novel is not out yet for comparison.)

I think this is just a moment of humor (which is more apparent in the manga version of this scene), not Grim literally saying beastmen have more fur than he does. He doesn’t seem to be familiar enough with other races to actually know this kind of information. He may also be relying on solely visual cues + scaling, and being that the beastmen are bigger than him, this could equate to more fur overall, even if it’s only their ears and tails. Additionally, Grim does not consider himself a cat, weasel, or tanuki and takes offense when others refer to him as such. It could be that he doesn’t think of himself as an animal, or sees the beastmen are being more animalistic than he is, hence why he makes the callout about how the beastmen are “furrier” than he is.

As far as beastmen go, we haven’t gotten any bonus materials, vignettes, event stories, or voiced lines which state that they’re furrier (or even hairier) than the average human. If they were, you’d think we’d see more visible patches on them or maybe the mention of maintaining their personal grooming more often.

We also see that beastmen have regular hair like that of a human and not necessarily fur; the texture of their fur and hair appears to be distinct, especially if you refer to the card illustrations. You can tell the shading and coloring is clearly different, though easier to see on Ruggie, Chenya, and Jack than Leona or Cheka due to the designs of their tails.

This is even easier to tell on Kifaji, who is a bird beastman. You can really tell that the hair on his head and his exaggerated eyebrows are hair, while his tail is made of feathers:

So yeah, I think beastmen have a combination of hair (from their human genes) and whatever their particular animal has (be it feathers, fur, etc.)

[hardly-an-escape]

just a little something for Tommy Kinard Appreciation Day and @peppermintquartz <3

A few weeks after they get back together, Tommy comes over to the loft for dinner. It's nothing fancy, no special occasion – Evan's got a new roasted chicken recipe and they both have the night off, so Tommy shows up around 6:00 with a bottle of wine and a slightly nicer-than-average shirt.

He's rummaging around in a kitchen drawer, looking for some matches or something to light the candles on the dining table, when he finds the notebook. It's one of those composition books with the classic black and white cover, the miniature version, a little beat up. He probably shouldn't read it – scratch that, he definitely shouldn't read it – but.

It's labeled with his name.

Tommy, right on the cover, in Evan's handwriting.

He glances over his shoulder. Evan has his back turned, fussing with the salad dressing and not particularly paying attention, so Tommy palms the little notebook and wanders over to the living room to open it.

The first page has a single sentence: Things I Miss about him. After that it turns into a list.

His eyes

the way his face scrunches up when he smiles for real

his hands

His ass! And his dick!!!

I feel like I shouldnt write that but it's true!!

Tommy swallows hard. Evan's handwriting is kind of uneven and hard to read, and his spelling and punctuation aren't the best – but it's undoubtedly a list, all lined up with neat little bullet points, of the things he'd missed about Tommy while they'd been apart.

His hugs

especialy the way he used to press our cheeks together and hang on just a little longer then I was expecting him too

He's such a good firefighter and so expereinced, I always felt like I couldve learned alot from him

the competency in general... hes so good at so many things!

he could be so bitchy/sarcastic but he's actually so kind. Like his jokes were never mean

Really good with kids

he would be an amazing dad someday

The last item is barely legible, thoroughly scratched out, as though Evan had thought twice about it the moment he'd written it down. Tommy feels tears prick behind his eyes. Evan would make a fantastic father, he thinks. They haven't really talked about it – marriage, kids, the whole nine yards. Before, it had been too early, and now that they're together again... it still feels too new, too raw, to bring it up. But Evan's the first person who's ever made Tommy want to have that conversation. He flips to the next page.

I don't want it to sound like I was only with him for sex but god I miss his body so much

Tommy snorts. He's so absorbed he doesn't hear Evan call out from the kitchen.

"What was that, babe?"

He took such good care of me. like when I hurt my shoulder but also just in general. He checked in with me alot and always made sure I was ok

really good listener

Did I take care of him enough? did I listen to him enough?

I think maybe I didn't

"Hey, Tommy, did you – oh," Evan says, poking his head around the stairs. "Uh. You found that."

"I'm sorry," Tommy says immediately. "I shouldn't have looked at it, I just – it had my name on it," he finishes lamely.

"It's okay," Evan says, coming to sit next to him on the couch. "It's just a little embarrassing. I didn't really know what to do with myself, I had a lot to say and, uh, people got kind of sick of me talking about you after a while. So I started writing it down. I kind of forgot it was still floating around."

The thing is, over the past couple of weeks they've talked about those last two items on the list. Tommy's been honest about the fact that he'd felt, at times, that he was being more careful with Evan than Evan was being with him. About the fact that he'd been okay with that, until he wasn't; that he'd been okay in the role of fun, sexy first boyfriend, until he realized that not only were he and Evan not on the same page, they weren't even reading the same book.

It's different to see the words written out so plainly. But they're on the same page now. They're walking into the same future, hand in hand.

Tommy sets the little notebook aside and laces his fingers together with Evan's.

"I love you a lot, you know," he says. It's not the first time he's said it, but it still feels so special it's a little unreal.

"I love you, too," Evan says instantly, beaming, eyes twinkling.

[archivewriter1ont]

Thoughts on The Bad Batch's "Superiority Complex"

(Bear with me -- I wrote this on my phone)

Someone brought up that the Bad Batch were the aggressors in their first fight with Kix and Jesse, and I've seen that take elsewhere too. These are just my thoughts on that...

I think that an important piece of this "the Batchers and the regs" puzzle (other than Crosshair, the snark, just naturally being more caustic than the others) is how being defective is addressed earlier in the Clone Wars and in the series as a whole. 

Krell basically uses "Are you defective?" as a threat at Umbara. Bric (trainer for Domino Squad) is openly ridiculing and abusive, going so far as to punch a cadet he thought wasn't good enough and saying things like "Even this bad batcher would be better than you" as a very demeaning thing. Even 99 realized how demeaning it was because he protested that the Dominoes were better than that. We also see with the Fives-chip arc, etc, that the Kaminoans are not the nicest beings to their “creations.” The trainers weren't either (see Dred Priest and again, Bric and Company).

Their "special project" status makes it very likely that the Kaminoans did experiment on or test the batchers in different ways than they would have done with the regs. The Batch very probably was confronted with their differences, what were seen as faults and flaws even as they were made into a commando squad, every moment of their lives. That not only has the potential to hurt the four of them and make them more likely to have a chip on their shoulders, but it also may have gotten around as rumors on Kamino. Also, Rex and the other 501st members we see with the Batchers haven't been on Kamino for a while, so the treatment from regs might have gotten worse as the Batchers had to interact with other units in training.

All that to say, the Bad Batch very likely experienced far worse than what we hear or see on screen, from trainers and their creators as well as other clones. They have (in all likelihood) existed on the edge of decommissioning for their entire lives, always having to prove that they were good enough to excuse their genetic faults. All four of them display a sort of hard confidence that indicates they know they’re the best because they had to be. While others passed the tests, they had to break records. They were pushed to excel the average just to prove their worth, to confirm that they deserved to live. 

This is another reason I prefer reading the Star Wars books and comics to watching the animated shows, in all honesty. The two versions of Quinlan Vos – animated and written – is a great example of the disconnect between (obviously, the best that could be expected from) an animated “kids” show and what I think is a better representation of what the war was actually like.

P.S. This is also why I HC that 99 was deeply involved with the Batch, because I honestly feel they would have a worse complex if they hadn’t had him to guide them how he could.

[witchthewriter]

𝐇𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐞𝐧𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞 ⋆.˚🦋༘⋆

⤷ female, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ | ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ ᴵᴵ

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・At first it was just kindness. You were there whenever Helaena needed you, and you soon you became her trusted friend.

・Trusted friend turned into something less platonic ... like a small evolution, Helaena realised that she could not live out her days without you by her side.

・Even though the Princess is not one for grand gestures of affection, you know just how all-consuming her love is ... in a deep yet quiet way.

・She gazes upon you with adoration, her violet eyes filled with a warmth barely anyone else ever receives.

・You are her safe place, her constant, the only one she can truly trust.

・Although she would NEVER say it outright - Helaena shows you her love through the way she lingers in your presence, the way her fingers brush slowly against yours, the soft smiles meant only for you.

・When you brush her hair, she leans into your touch, a small sigh escaping her lips.

・Sometimes, when she’s feeling brave, she will trace her fingers over your wrist absentmindedly, as if memorizing the feel of you. Both of you blush but neither says a word.

・She adores giving you small gifts—a butterfly pin she had made just for you, an embroidered handkerchief with her own initials (so that a piece of her is always with you), actually, a lot of your clothes have hidden bugs that she has sewn to signify that you are hers.

・She plucks flowers from the royal gardens and presses them into books before leaving them in your chambers, never saying a word about it.

・When she’s alone with you, she finally breathes. She lets down her walls and allows herself to be just Helaena, not a princess.

・She’ll ask you to stay with her a little longer, finding excuses for you to keep her company; whether it’s brushing her hair, helping her dress, or simply sitting in silence while she watches her insects.

・Helaena speaks in riddles and half-truths, but around you, her words take on a soft, intimate quality.

"If a moth is drawn to a flame, yet the flame does not burn it ..." (aka devotion from both ends. One is endless curiosity and the other is making sure their actions do not hurt the other. It's about you and her.)

・She is always comparing you to something ethereal - e.g., a rare moth, a fleeting sunrise, a melody no one else can hear but her.

・You asked her why she liked moths so much and she said: "moths are ... overlooked. Much more than butterflies. They are drawn to light...just like everyone else. Yet, just like everyone else. They are not treated the same."

・One of your favourite memories with Helaena is when she introduced you to Dreamfyre.

・You thought, 'surely today is the day that I day," oh how wrong you were.

・Dreamfyre chooses her riders for specific reasons both Rhaena Targaryen and Helaena Targaryen were not the most politically powerful of their time, nor were they the most feared.

・But Dreamfyre does not seek conquest or brute force—she seeks something deeper. Rhaena and Helaena both had a deep connection to things beyond the mortal world, and Dreamfyre recognized it.

・Rhaena and Helaena were both women who were not meant to rule. They were overlooked, dismissed, forced into positions they never truly wanted.

・Many Targaryens could have tried to claim Dreamfyre, but she has never allowed herself to be ruled by greed or ambition.

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

You Are My Safe Place

Always Hold Grudges (You) x Forgives Too Easily (Helaena)

Has Insane Dreams Of The Future (Helaena) x Believes All Of It - Lemme Write This Down Honey (You)

𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Love Transcending Boundaries

Forbidden Love

Only You Understand

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

Kiss Me by Sixpence None The Richer

Picture You by Chappel Roan

Do I Wanna Know by Hozier

𝒀𝒐𝒖 & 𝑫𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒇𝒚𝒓𝒆

・To Helaena, Dreamfyre is more than just her dragon; she is her kindred spirit, the only creature who has always understood her.

・Dreamfyre is ancient, wise, and deeply connected to her rider’s emotions. If Helaena is bringing you to meet her, it means she sees you as someone truly important.

・The cave depths of the Dragonpit echo with the sound of slow, deep breathing as Dreamfyre stirs at Helaena’s approach. The Dragonpit is huge; even more spacious down below, where the chained dragons sleep.

・You were glad that Dreamfyre's place was quite close to the exit.

・As you walked closer to the now fully awake, and alert dragon, you squeezed Helaena's hand tightly, your fingers trembling. Hell you're whole body feels like it's trembling.

・When you're close, you can see Dreamfyre's great silver-blue head and her glowing eyes ... that settle on you with deep intensity.

・Your heart starts to pound even more so.

・Helaena strokes the dragon’s snout, whispering in High Valyrian, her voice a soft hum against the cavern’s stillness. Then she turns to you.

“Now you must not be afraid,” she murmurs, because there is an underlying meaning beneath her words: Dreamfyre will know if you are.

・The dragon sniffs the air, then lowers her massive head, exhaling a warm breath that ruffles your hair. She is assessing you.

・You hold your ground. Dying by a dragon seems like a pretty cool way to go, so you stare the dragon in the eyes. And for some reason, your hand start to move.

・You gently cup the side of Dreamfyre's face and smile.

・Helaena is holding her breath - she hadn't expected you to do that. And she's impressed.

・With a few slow blinks, Dreamfyre huffs which causes your hair to fly backwards.

・And then you feel it, her head moving towards your hand, liking the touch.

"She accepts you," Helaena says with glee.

[vershautece]

There’s actually a long retweet that he deleted but it essentially said that women are the Achilles heel of the species and they’ll never understand male spaces. He was also interested in an Indian writer’s (Jash Dholani) unreleased book and flew out to meet him & gave him feedback. Someone recently read the book and said it was a lot of misogynistic views (ie. how women shouldn’t be in the workplace etc). At least up until recently Luigi’s opinions were definitely red-pilled leaning 😬

yeah, i know all about that! i saw it on reddit about a month ago, i’ll paste my own reddit response here because it’s the best way to explain what i think. i should have posted this weeks ago actually:

“This is just how I interpret his character, based on everything I’ve seen, but it seems that his struggle to develop relationships with women (or anyone, he said he struggles to connect w/ people in general) was made worse by his adopting the typical masculine stoicism and the pressure that comes with that, wondering why you aren’t connecting well with women when the men online are telling you you’re perfect. This would have seriously affected his mental health, especially regarding view of self. It happens to SO many men who align with stoicism, and Luigi ended up getting manipulated by the extremely misogynistic evolutionary theory that women and men are biologically different, so much so that men need their own ‘spaces’. I don’t hate him for this, I feel sorry for him - these red-pilled accounts definitely helped him come to the false conclusion that the only reason women don’t understand him is because of a biological difference where any woman can never truly understand any man. Also, his interest in science would have further made that ideology appealing.”

& “He had close platonic friendships with girls, so I don’t believe at all that he hates women, but the people he agrees with are on that path.”

so essentially i’m saying that when you look at the reason why he succumbed to that thinking (stemming from his stoicism and issues with relationships), and you pair that with the sort of person he is (loving, caring, has friends that are women, no one has a bad word to say about him) he is clearly not a misogynist, rather he’s being manipulated by misogynist writers and philosophies. things aren’t always as black and white as they seem; i know we don’t actually know luigi personally, but i understand precisely why he took up these views and i feel sorry for him - he won’t have these views in the aggressive way a lot of men do.

thank you for sending me this actually, because i should’ve mentioned it when i first saw it!

[honeyxbee]

Can you please do a part 2 to losing game yandere L

Checkmate

Yandere!L x gn!reader

TW : captive reader, runaway attempt, manipulation(sorta?) words 1167 A/N: Okay, I may have gotten a little carried away lol. But I hope you enjoy! Find part 1 here!

It's frustrating how normal life as L's captive can feel sometimes.

Actually, no. It's infuriating.

Oh, you want to watch a movie? The television in the living room has almost every streaming service you could think of. Want to read a specific book? You just have to let Watari know if you can't find it in the library, and he will get it for you. Hell, you're even allowed to call your friends and family as long as L or Watari are there to supervise you. In a way, it's almost like you're just a normal girl living with your rich, genius boyfriend and his father.

Well, aside from the fact you're not allowed to leave.

"L mentioned that he would be back in time for dinner this evening," Watari's conversational tone brings you out of your thoughts, your eyes landing on the older man. He's holding out the steaming teacup for you to take. You accept it as you always do, watching him set out finger sandwiches and tiny pastries on the table.

"..Thanks," you murmur softly, taking a small sip of the hot beverage. You don't comment on L's return, choosing to shove down the feeling of unease that always seems to make itself known when thinking about him. He mentioned before that his current case requires him to work with others, so it's not abnormal that he's away for most of the day, though he's given you no further information as to what that even means.

Admittedly, the thought of him working with another person feels strange to you. When you applied to work with him, it was made very clear to you that he almost always worked alone. That you were a special case.

The thought sends a shiver up your spine, and your eyes quickly return to the window. One good thing about the sunroom is that it's easy to avoid conversation when you keep your eyes fixed on the flowers. Well, at least when it comes to Watari. He always seems to understand that it's a sign that you don't wish to speak, and he sits quietly.

L just seems to see it as a reason to ask a thousand questions ― oh, you like flowers? Have you always liked flowers? What's your favorite flower? Did you know that research shows that flowers have an immediate positive impact on mood and happiness?-

"Would you be okay here on your own while I go get ingredients for dinner?" Watari asks after a few minutes of silence, making you blink.

"..Huh?"

"I need to get some things from the store," Watari repeats, taking a drink of his tea. "Would you be okay here by yourself while I'm away? It should only be an hour, but if you don't think-"

"Yes!" you blurt out before realizing that you sound a little too excited. "I mean, yeah, I'll be okay," you correct yourself, forcing yourself to take another sip from your teacup.

Watari studies your face for a moment, clearly searching for any sign of apprehension. But when he finds none, he nods. "..Very well."

You try not to seem too eager as you watch him finish his tea and then take the cup to the kitchen, your thoughts racing. They're leaving you unattended. You're actually going to be alone.

"I shall return soon. Is there anything you wish me to grab for you while I'm out?" Watari asks as he heads to the door. When you shake your head no, he walks out, the door shutting softly behind him.

And then it's quiet.

For a few minutes, you don't move. You remain seated, sipping your tea as you wait for any signs of Watari's return. And then you set your cup on the table and slowly make your way to the closet for the shoes L bought you so you could visit the gardens.

You unlock the front door with shaky hands, opening it ever-so-slowly and looking around for any signs of life.

There's nothing.

So you slam the door shut, and you run.

You don't even know where you're running to. But you see some buildings in the distance, so you run in that direction. Your lungs protest at the unexpected sprint, and your heart feels like it may pound out of your chest, but you try to force yourself to ignore it and focus on the feeling of the fresh air. The heat of the sun on your skin. Freedom.

You had almost forgotten what that felt like.

You almost want to cry in relief when you get closer to the buildings; you realize you're in Tokyo.

You guess L isn't as intelligent as he thinks he is, you consider with a small triumphant smile. If he was truly a genius, he would have kept you somewhere isolated, right? Definitely not somewhere so close to the heart of Tokyo.

Now you just need to find some help ― a hospital, maybe.

Or the police station, you think, your heart rate picking up in excitement when you see there's one not too far up the street. You run the entire way there, not stopping until you're in front of the desk and you're sputtering out everything that's happened.

The police officer seems completely confused until you say 'L', and then his eyes widen. "Wait, L?"

"Yes! You know who I'm talking about, right?" you ask desperately.

He nods and asks for your name. You give it to him, and he escorts you to a private room in the back and asks you to wait there. And for the first time since you left L's house, you allow yourself to take a breath, the exhaustion hitting you full force. When he returns, he tells you that he has the chief's permission to escort you to the building they're working in.

You don't realize what he means by 'they' until you're already in the building.

And you want to scream. To cry. To curse whatever cruel deity that seems to enjoy your suffering.

"..Hello," L says, tilting his head at you from where he's seated at his computer; his lips twitched upwards in a barely noticeable smile.

The police officer who brought you to the building smiles, his eyes wide in amazement. "I can't believe you're actually dating someone, L!"

L's eyes remain fixed on your face in silent contemplation. And then speaks. "..Chief Yagami, it has been a while since my partner has helped with an investigation, but I assure you, they're quite talented. If you do not mind, I would like for them to join our efforts.

"I'm sure they will be a valuable addition to our investigation going forward," the older man agrees with a nod, a friendly smile on his face.

And you feel as if you are once again back at L's house, a familiar scene on the table between you. A lone king on an oversized chessboard, unable to do anything aside from awaiting your opponent's final blow.

Checkmate.

[morisbasement]

oh and in celebration of the emerald wirch arc anime coming out next year, i have some tips for the new black butler fans!! or old if they apply to you lol

ALWAYS read the manga first.

the anime deviates so far from the manga that season 2 can't even be considered canon. im not even joking here. after the second half of s1, the animators just pulled shit out of their rears and called it a day. they didn't pull it together until book of circus, but to anyone who had watched the anime before reading the manga, the story made zero sense. i watched the series three times trying to understand it but it wasn't anything but crack until i read the manga.

if you can't buy the manga, read it on mangakakalot.com or mangareader.to, but PLEASE read it before watching.

sebaciel is (somewhat) canon, heavily implied at times, but so are lots of ships, so for the love of god please don't hate on shippers

yana toboso, the writer, has admitted that kuroshitsuji was originally intended to be a yaoi, but her publishers warned her against it. (← im told that's a rumor) there were still some sebaciel-esque scenes in the manga, so be warned! but there are also other implied ships (which is basically the entirety of s2), so suffice to say there are bound to be lots of ship wars. please don't turn the kuroshitsuji fandom into another mha fandom 😭

if you're sensitive to proship content, especially adult × child, STEER CLEAR of black butler.

while an argument may be made that it's not technically a proship since pedophilia isn't a crime in japan or since it's a human × nonhuman, therefore age gap rules aren't as cut and dry as they would be otherwise, sebastian is still portrayed as an adult and ngl it can be kind of triggering for victims of this kind of thing, and just icky in general if you don't know to expect it.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE pay heed to the content warnings, not the actual rating.

some streaming services say that kuroshitsuji is tv14. TRUST ME. it's not. here's a full list of content warnings:

severe violence

lots of sexual themes including rape, not once but TWICE (in the anime, only once in the manga) by sebastian, and pedophilia

intense gore

there is a character who is somewhat minorly important who is a lolicon

deals with themes including cults, rejection of the christian faith, demons, rituals, supernatural phenomena, and generally disturbing stuff. for crying out loud a TWELVE YEAR OLD kid has summoned a demon servant, is a major underworld crime god, and has survived some major cult shit.

language is pretty bad

one of the character's main things is he's basically obsessed with stepcest

arranged marriages for kids

stalking

lots and lots of murder

it's a horror series, what do you expect

both explicit and implicit sex scenes aplenty

manipulation, mindbreak, and abuse

there's a whole jack the ripper arc and it is MESSY

it's bad at the start and only gets worse! please please please only get involved with kuroshitsuji if you can handle that!

both the manga and anime are ongoing, so don't treat it as a one and done!

yana paused production of the manga to work on a game called twisted wonderland (edit: and apparently to focus on bb too? dunno how that works) , but more chapters and arcs are expected, and the series is far from over despite starting over a decade ago! i reread and rewatch every now and then to stay updated (and because it's a great series)! while i realize that can be a bit of a task, trust me when i say it's worth it!!

lastly, have fun with it!!!

kuroshitsuji fandom has been dying. REVIVE IT!! engage with fan works! cosplay! talk to other fans! make friends! convert people to the dark side!! be down bad!! be weird, be cringe!!! do whatever as long as it isnt toxic!!!

[delis-4-meats]

I've just had the realization...

...that I- *sobs*- I only hyper fixate on doomed from the start ships and I'm kinda pissed about it, so I'm making it everyone's problem.

OKAAAY HERE WE GO!

Merlin and Arthur:

(There are 5 seasons of romantic/sexual(?) tension I need to cover and not enough time so imma just throw shit out there)

Merlin (a sorcerer/wizard/god/Hiccup Haddock) accidentally gets the job of being Prince Arthur of Camelot's manservant... Bro really didn't want the job. At this time in Camelot, sorcery is illegal but what most don't know is that some are born with magic abilities, so they are convicting and executing innocent people. Soooo yeah, living in the same place as a bunch of anti-witch people and being someone who practices/was born with magic abilities, not good. Eventually Arthur and Merlin became inseparable, Merlin throughout the years has been saving Arthur's life without him knowing and trying to change Arthur's opinion on sorcery without outing himself. In the end Arthur dies (In Merlin's arms btw after he proposed to Merlin) and Merlin is doomed to wander the Earth for all of eternity (Because pookie is basically the wizard god and refuses to die until he sees Arthur again) waiting for Arthur to come back. (SOBS MY EYELIDS OFF)

Megatron and Optimus:

(This is just for TFO, I'm not going to get into the burning shit hole that is TFP, IDW, G-1, and every other wonderful universe's Optimus and Megatron relationship)

Besties/Lovers, inseparable, the ideal relationship in a hard, down on your luck life... Then they realized they were slaves and had two ways of going about taking out their terrible tyrant of a leader (Fucking hate Sentinel). Megs going straight to murder and possibly torture in front of all of Icon (Exposing Sentinel in such a harsh, violent way that would've gone against his moral compass in the beginning of the movie). OP though, has a different approach to expose him to the rest of the world (Sure, is taking someone's head and racking their brain for memories kinda violent, yeah. Does it probably hurtless/is less harmful for big space robots then it is for humans, most likely. It was still a little unsettling for me though) and, unlike Megs, wants to imprison him. Megs got lost in his rage and vengeance (Sasuke core) that made him do a whole lot of things he CAN'T take back, even if he wanted to (He doesn't want to. He's so convinced that he knows what he's doing is morally correct and will fix all his pain). OP was hurt badly emotionally at least (My boi has a whooole lot of trauma) and was actually KILLED by Megs, he has a whole WORLD literally forced onto his shoulders with his new position of a Prime and he (A former mining slave with no education) NEEDS to take care of the whole damn thing. On top of that OP was thrown into war with the Quintessons while probably having to deal with terf battles with the Deceptions, controlling potential riots, politics (ew), and supporting a probably failing economy. ("Thanks Primus," said no one ever. Hi, I'm no one.)

Thorin and Bilbo:

(I'm talking about the movies, yes I read the book, but shut up because I like the movies and idc what you say)

Strangers to friends to lovers in little more than a year. Thorin was guarded, stoical, rude, and harsh with Bilbo in the beginning because he thought that Bilbo was too pompous and fragile to help in their treacherous journey. And Bilbo (being the pompous lil boi he is) is scared out of his head, full of wonder of the world outside the Shire (enough sass to fill the Earth like the great flood in da Bible), and was basically forced on said treacherous journey, has feelings for Thorin but they are purely physical and fade quickly because of how rude Thorin is to him (very ungentlemanly for a king if you ask him). But over time Bilbo proves that he's more than his best suit and by the heavens, Thorin. Is. Down. BAD. He can defend himself to a certain extent, hot. He can use his wit to get out of almost any situation, hot. He will give up his word and sacrifice his honor on Thorin's name and honesty, hot as fuck man. They basically have a WHOLE MOVIE with them subtly loving on each other... BUT THEN THORIN GETS THE DRAGON SICKNESS!! He goes crazy over cursed dragon gold, throws out Bilbo, and starts a war. Then after like half the movie, he faces the danger and says 'NO MORE!' to the gold, rallies his troops, wins the war, AND BLEEDS OUT AND DIES!! IN BILBO'S ARMS!! Leaving POOR SWEET BILBO to go home, alone, depressed, and CURSED!! Bilbo comes home and everyone thinks he was dead so they're selling (Stealing) his belongings, his name and reputation is dragged through the mud because he went on an AdVeNtUrE, and he's single for the REST OF HIS LIFE!! (They ruin me... Cries around my suspiciously bagginshield shaped fics & fanart)

Ok, I'm done... For now.

Gonna be honest, doing this made me think of more ships Bdko (iykyk), SkyStar, and Hijack (In a lot of fics that I read anyway) are a few of them.

Might do this again it was a good vent, besides no one's gonna see this anyway.

[cherrycheolkat]

• no blueberries, feat. mingyu, pt. 3 •

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁

pairing: kim mingyu x f!reader

mentioned: seungcheol, joshua, vernon, christian yu (dpr ian in part ii& iii)

word count: 3.1k

genre: fake dating, college au, college student!mingyu, college student!reader, fluff, f2l, idiots, idiots in love, angst, pining, denial of feelings, established friendship (reader & ian), miscommunication

summary: mingyu was just your lab partner and study buddy for several semesters, but lately things seem to have changed, and maybe everyone else has noticed, but for the most part, neither of you even think about what you are to one another until mingyu asks you to be his 'fake' date for a long weekend trip so he can avoid an ex, the biggest problem is realizing that there's nothing fake about your relationship but when mingyu won't even talk about what you are to each other, you start to think things might be over before they even really start

warnings: explicit language, mentions of anxiety, sexually suggestive situations, drinking, smut, penetrative sex, oral (m. receiving)

a/n: they are still idiots but idiots who are finally getting it together ;-;

xx kat

[part i] [part ii]

♡ if you would like to be tagged in my upcoming posts, go [here]

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔

she spent the rest of the break hanging out with ian - they went to a few art galleries and some new restaurants. she didn’t upload her photos anywhere, she didn’t want to make things any worse with mingyu. it was just a low-key break. she slept late a few mornings, went running if she felt like it, and took long breaks from reading a book she had found by staring out the huge windows of ian’s apartment. he had an insane view of the city. 

the problem was her habit of snapping photos because she was suddenly without anyone to send them to - she had taken tons, and she could sit and scroll through them, but they only made her feel lonely as the break wore on. she kept thinking if he would just post one thing where he looked like he was having fun, then she could pretend nothing had happened. everything would go back to factory settings or something - she wasn’t sure.

it was only the last night of break, while they were having dinner, that ian asked her about mingyu.

“so, have you answered him at all?” 

naturally, she knew the ‘him’ being referred to. “not yet,” she paused, “i don’t really know what to say - how do you back up from the fact that you left someone during a vacation because you’re in this weird tenuous space where neither of you seem to be able to talk about anything properly?”

he laughed, “yeah, that’s a nice description - i’m sure i’ll back away from the discussion now,” he rolled his eyes, “you have class with him tomorrow don’t you?”

she nodded, “yep - two classes, actually, and usually we grab breakfast,” she sighed, “not tomorrow though, i guess.”

he drummed his fingers on the table, “because you can’t, you know uh, give him a ring and i don’t know, maybe ask to talk?”

she stared at her plate, not wanting to let the reasonableness sink in too deeply. 

she poked at her food, “look, i don’t like that he kept something from me, and i don’t like that admitting we might be a couple seems like such an issue,” she pursed her lips. 

she had had a lot of time sitting around to think through how she was actually feeling, and even if she handled things badly, she felt like there were legitimate issues.

“ah, and so instead of telling him about all of this, you’re just going to avoid it, or did i miss something?”

she shrugged, “i don’t know - shouldn’t he maybe know that i have issues with these things?”

“to me? how would he - and why are you being so inflexible - we both know you like him, maybe you just need to take a step towards him instead of running in the opposite direction like your hair is on fire whenever you start to have some real feelings,” he sounded way too sage. 

“don’t be obnoxious,” she deadpanned.

he swirled his wine, “look, if you want to end it with him, then just do it, but waiting around, seems like a big mistake, especially if you do care about him - you’re stringing him along.”

she sighed, “i think i’ll wait to see if he’s suddenly back with his ex before i do anything,” she concluded icily. 

he laughed and sipped his wine, “so avoid him until he does something that proves your theory then?”

she flipped him off. 

but even when she went to bed in his spare room, she kept tossing in bed. she couldn’t get comfortable. 

it was too hot - then too cold - her back hurt, but she didn’t like sleeping on her stomach. she was convinced the aircon wasn’t working properly and kept trying to feel the air from the vent by standing on a chair. she eventually gave up and sat down to scream into her pillow out of sheer frustration. but, lying there post-scream, more than anything, she wondered what mingyu was doing. 

she kept checking his socials, looking for signs of life, but he hadn’t posted anything. she checked again, and when there was still nothing, she went to her messages to stare at the draft she had typed out. she had typed short things and long things, and she kept coming back to the fact that they were all wrong. none of them said the right things - none of them were going to fix anything. 

she glanced at the clock, 10:38 pm. she stared around and finally typed a message quickly and hit send. she couldn’t undo it - it was already gone. all she could do was stare at her phone and wonder if he would reply. 

after about one minute, she shoved her phone off the bed, certain he would never talk to her again. she couldn’t handle waiting and checking. she had flipped her ringer on, though, just in case he did answer. she hoped that he would, but she was very sure that he wouldn’t. in her mind, he had totally forgotten her and was already back together with katie, exactly where he should be. and she was alone - probably forever. she was definitely going to die alone, and not just in the poetic way of how we are all alone in death or whatever. 

she practically leapt out of bed when the little ping suddenly interrupted her thoughts. 

[mango 10:41]

where?

she stared for a moment, trying to remember what she had even asked - she glanced back at her message, asking if they could meet. 

she bit her lip, trying to think of where might even make sense, but she saw his little typing bubble and waited to see what he said. when it went away, she felt like she needed to answer quickly or all would be lost, she named a park - it was probably closer to him, but she didn’t exactly care. she waited, feeling nervous all over again. 

but then her phone screen lit up - he was calling her. she watched for a moment, silently panicking, before finally swiping to answer.

“why do you want to meet in a park, y/n?” he asked immediately, no preamble, just his husky, sleepy voice.

she shrugged, “i don’t know - i guess so we can talk in private?” 

she knew precisely how uncertain she sounded.

he was quiet for a moment, “just come here - it’s only me,” his voice trailed away.

she closed her eyes, “did they decide to stay or something?”

she felt horrible for asking. 

“not everyone has monday classes.”

she hummed, “right.”

she suddenly felt tired - she realized how used to talking to him at night she was. the difference being they were usually in the same room, and the same bed. 

she sighed, “i miss you.”

she picked at the fabric of the duvet she was lying on top of - it had never become comfortable for reason. 

“like a lot,” she added, voice soft, floating off into nothingness.

she stared hard at the white fabric of the duvet, waiting for him to say something, as she tried to follow the lines of the fabric’s weave. and the silence only made her hate that she had taken ian’s advice. he was wrong - she should never have taken a first step or any step at all. 

she started to say his name, thinking maybe he had fallen asleep. 

“so come here, then you won’t have to miss me,” he whispered. 

“mmmh, are you mad at me?”

she could hear him shift around, “not mad - maybe confused,” he paused, “but not so much that it really matters right now when i just want to be with you.”

she nodded, feeling her stomach flutter, “mingyu?”

“hmm,” his voice was low.

she knew what she was thinking, but she wasn’t sure how to say it.

“if it’s too late”— she started.

“y/n, just - please come - i’ve missed you too,” he spoke quickly. 

⋆˙⟡

she ordered a car, and without traffic, she was over the bridge quickly. it didn’t stop her from being nervous when she hit the buzzer for his apartment. even walking up the familiar stairs, she was still jittery. she decided that if she needed to leave, at least it would be a quick ride home to her very empty, very cold bed. 

she was expecting to need to wait outside his door, but he was already there, waiting for her. she gave a small wave as she neared him. even dressed in sweats and a tshirt with slight bedhead, he looked stupidly handsome. no, she decided, he was much worse than handsome; he was gorgeous and perfect, and she had missed spending her entire break with him. 

she only noticed his split lip when she was closer, immediately reaching for him, “what happened to you?”

he shrugged and moved for her to go inside, which she did since standing in the hallway wasn’t the best thing. but she immediately rounded on him, “seriously, what happened to you?”

“nothing,” he caught her hands lightly before they could make contact with his face.

she tried to tamp down her annoyance because it felt like, again, he was just holding out on her. for no reason she could even begin to understand. 

unlike earlier in the week, she wasn’t looking for a reason to be annoyed with him, but she wanted to know. 

“please tell me?”

“why, y/n? it was just something stupid with seungcheol - it’s not important,” he whispered, his hands tracing lightly over her arms. 

she groaned, “yes, it is,” she could see him getting ready to assure her that it wasn’t - “it’s important, just like the stuff katie said to you, okay - all of it matters to me because it’s about you, so even if it annoys me or whatever, please tell me, okay? you’re not protecting me from anything - it just makes me feel like you don’t trust me or something,” she had imagined being a bit calmer when she explained that, but she hadn’t known how soon they would be talking about it either. 

he nodded, “fine,” he laughed, “he was trying to make me feel better about you leaving, and it turned into me calling him short and we sort of got in fight,” he nodded, his face flushing.

she stared at him for a moment, “did you at least hit him back?”

“yeah,” he whined, “he was being a dick to begin with.”

“i thought you said he was trying to make you feel better?” 

he rolled his eyes, “he was, in a very seungcheol way, and even if he was right, i didn’t like the things he pointed out,” he said matter-of-factly.

she tilted her head slightly, wondering what seungcheol had pointed out. although, she had the distinct feeling this wasn’t the time to ask. they were both quiet for a moment. she could feel his fingers tracing along her waist, gently pulling her closer.

“did you actually miss me?”

she nodded, “umhm,” she stepped closer, leaning into him, feeling his arms surround her.

she pressed close, glad that there was no distance between them. 

“i’m sorry i left,” she whispered. he kissed the top of her head in response. 

they stayed there hugging like it would make up for the last few days. and then they went to his room to go to bed. but even lying next to him, she knew she wasn’t exactly doing anything differently than before. she was letting the physical calm between them fill all the little emotional cracks, but that wasn’t going to fix how she felt. it would just keep things together until the next time and the next time until maybe the cracks were too big to be held together. 

which was how she found herself poking mingyu in the cheek at 3 am until he woke up.

“what’s wrong?” he sounded only slightly annoyed, like she did this all time, and he was used to it. 

she took advantage of the fact that he was groggy, not because she thought it would help her get what she wanted - it was because groggy mingyu was less intimidating than fully engaged mingyu. 

“nothing, but i need to ask you something,” she whispered. 

he whined “right now?”

“yes, it’s important.”

he nodded, barely keeping his eyes open, “okay, what is it?”

maybe she was wrong, even groggy mingyu made her stomach turn back flips. “do you want to date me?” she was barely audible.

she watched him close his eyes - her stomach immediately sank. 

but then he nodded, “yes, of course - that’s what i was trying to tell you before, about being with you is all that matters.”

she leaned over him, playing with his hair, “i wasn’t completely focused on those things.”

“i know.”

she watched him for a moment before leaning close to kiss him. it was sweet at first - soft and mellow - neither were in a rush. she realized that even a few days without kissing him felt like ages. to her, mingyu had seemed half asleep, but after a few minutes, she found herself on her back, caged in by his arms as they continued to kiss. when she felt his hand slide down to grip her thigh, she knew it was over - the fact that it was the middle of the night didn’t matter. she gasped softly when she felt his hips press roughly against hers. he found his rhythm easily, rolling his hips against her, teasing her. she pulled his hair roughly, wanting to feel more. 

she managed to break their kiss and press him back. she pulled off her own shirt before tugging at his, wanting him to undress too. she watched him run a hand through his hair before finally matching her, pulling off his shirt, and he followed her example again when she stripped off her pants and underwear. 

she pressed close to him, running her fingers down his chest, loving his muscles - she wondered if she told him that enough - the things she liked about him. she leaned up to kiss beneath his collarbone.

“you’re so perfect,” she whispered against his skin, kissing further down his chest. she pressed him back onto the bed, leaving a trail of kisses and bites and whispered praise as she went. 

she liked going down on him - there was something about the size of his cock that she couldn’t help but enjoy. she licked a fat stripe along the underside of his cock, paying attention to the thick vein there, all the while, she heard him moaning softly. she smiled, kissing his shaft and sucking gently at the skin as she moved up to suck his tip. she tasted his precum and enjoyed knowing that she could make him leak for her, just like he could make her a wet, sopping mess. 

she pulled back, hearing his soft panting, “good baby?”

he groaned, “what do you think?”

she smiled and leaned up to kiss him. she licked into him and moved so that she was straddling him. she grasped his cock, hearing his low groan. he knew she was going to finish him off by riding him. he gave her ass a soft smack, urging her on as she lined her pussy up with his cock. she didn’t waste any time taking him in - she let herself slide down on him until she was sure she could feel his cock in her stomach. she stayed there for a moment, loving the way he filled her. she leaned back enough to let her hands rest on his thighs for leverage, and then she started to move her hips. 

she knew he liked when she was a bit rough - she loved the way he watched his cock disappear inside her. she felt his fingers on her clit, massaging it in little circles, she moaned, “fuck, just like that.”

he bit his lip, “come on, finish yourself on me like a good girl,” he rasped. 

her eyes fluttered closed, and she smiled at the idea that she was just using him for his cock when they were like this. 

instead though, she started to whimper and whine, “i can’t,” she gasped.

“can’t what baby girl?”

her hips had slowed, “can’t get myself off like this - need your help, daddy,” she leaned forward, her fingernails barely digging into the skin of his chest, “help me?” she whined softly, knowing how much he liked it, feeling his cock throb inside her.

she kept him inside as they swapped positions - she grinned up at him, “fuck me?”

he nodded, picking up her thighs and throwing them over his shoulders - his first thrust left her mewling. the way he was hitting every spot so perfectly left her grasping the edge of the mattress, whining his name over and over as he slammed into her. 

she squeezed him tightly, hearing the soft grunts, despite how determined he looked, until suddenly he became relentless, fucking into her like she was the toy - their roles reversed. she came, gasping and moaning, almost choking on her own pleasure, and still feeling him pumping into her until he finally finished with a hard groan - his cum filling her completely. he leaned down between her legs, sweat glistening on his skin, as their bodies melded and they kissed until he finally pulled out with a soft moan.

“fuck,” he groaned, wiping himself off with his discarded tshirt before turning to her to do the same. 

she pulled him into another lingering kiss. she wounder her fingers in his hair, wanting nothing else but to stay in the afterglow with him. 

when he leaned back, licking his lips, “so did that count as ‘make-up sex’ or ‘we’re dating sex’?”

she laughed softly, “both maybe?” she suggested, watching him.

“or maybe i just really missed you sex?” she offered after amoment.

he nodded, “i was afraid you wouldn’t miss me at all.”

she pressed closer to him, kissing him again. it was soft, though. 

“how could i not miss you?” she asked as she pulled away, “i love you,” she whispered, a new flush coloring her cheeks.

she waited nervously for him to respond - she had thought it so many times. it was only when he kissed her back, gently pulling away and whispering his own confession, that she relaxed, knowing that mingyu loved her too. 

⋆˙⟡

they did not go to classes the next day. 

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁

a/n: look they made it! sorry if miscommunication (lack of communication maybe in this case) isn’t your genre - to me it’s like the main driver of most issues…there could be more pining but as someone who also loves instant crushes….i actually just want them together

anyway, tell me what to write next…some vampire x human arranged marriage?? or like type a personality / type b personality rivals to lovers…both are in my wips but so are so manyyy other things, like mafia au with arranged marriage, gov’t assigned soulmates and more random stuff - give me input, plz - otherwise it may end up being this random idea i had about golf and fr no one needs that

♡ kat

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁ ִ ࣪⚝₊ ⊹˚ .𖥔 ݁

tag list: @syluslittlecrows @cherrylovescheol

if you want to be tagged, go [here] & my [master list] if you want to read more

[yandere-daydreams]

black butler and homestuck are trending on the same day i have to edit my college-necessitated research paper on harry potter. what fucking year even is it anymore.

[who-do-i-know-this-man]

⚠️Vote for whomever YOU DO NOT KNOW⚠️‼️

[featherymainffins]

Can anyone who knows Uglies explain what the hell changed that just 10 years ago it was considered great and groundbreaking and now I see nothing but people saying that it's dumb and uninspired and has no point or meaning?

[moe-broey]

GOD I would HATE to be stuck at a family dinner with them 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I would NOT fucking survive, the vibes alone would do 1000 points poison damage to me 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Also JUST. JUST.

THE VIBES. ARE RANCID. SHARENA DARLING YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER THAN THIS (ALFPNSE TOO BUT DEAR LORD. Sharena LITERALLY was just told to Don't Speak Unless Spoken To RANCID. RANCID FUCKING FAMILY)

[kyouka-supremacy]

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