#but it’s whatever like i’m really done trying and telling ppl my personal business and trying to be friendly like it’s done | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jewishbarbies · 1 year ago

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Hey so I'm the anon from earlier with the long essay about the closeting thing and sorry I came across very angry but it wasnt directed at you as much as everyone in general who say queer celebs have a jollie good time in hollywood being queer and don't need beards because all's well in utopia and that frustrates me and I directed it at you which I shouldn't have

But I still stand by the general opinions I said and honestly, if you ask me about taylor, I am queer and when I hear her lyrics, I feel quite strongly that certain songs couldn't have been written unless she has experienced some deep longing for a woman. But what a lot of ppl seem to think is that just because she might be queer means she is a good person and that simply is not true. I mean look at Ellen DeGeneres. She is very gay and she is also an asshole. Taylor Swift, in my view, is very much an Ellen kinda queer

And her being queer doesn't erase her racism, her anti-Semitism, her white feminism none of it. I just think we can criticise her without saying she "queerbaits" because sexuality is not something that exists in a box like a costume that people can just try on. Sexuality is not a political thing, it's human nature. If you ask me, none of us are probably totally straight and I understand that there's a lot of heteronormative societal structures that prevent people from understanding this but when it comes down to biology, it's really as simple as that. That's why i do loathe the accusations being leveled these days at real people for queerbaiting because that's not the definition of queerbaiting nor has it ever been.

And I think if she chooses to be closeted, she is going to behave like a closeted, publicly straight artist like many others do. I also don't think she chooses to hide because she is afraid of discrimination but I think it's cos she is so attached to her fame and the attention she gets from dating men, she wouldn't sacrifice it by revealing certain truths about herself. She is too narcissistic for that imo

There's no shortage of problematic things taylor has done without needing to bring up the sexuality aspect that's all

Sorry this got long, I've had this on my mind for a while now

that very well could be true about her, but as long as she identifies as straight I’m going to also identify her as straight and I feel like it’s leaning into problematic territory not to. she could’ve felt something for a woman at some time in her life but still identifies as straight. I don’t think we’ll ever know and frankly it’s none of our business. all you should know is what she tells you, and she’s straight up told us that she’s straight in interviews. so no matter what she writes about, I’m not saying OR speculating that she could be anything else. I think that’s the biggest issue with saying not to speculate is that most people still speculate anyway to some degree, and it just needs to stop. you’re more than welcome to hear her music however you hear it and have the opinions you have. but as far as taylor specifically is concerned, she identifies as straight.

the way I view the queerbaiting situation with taylor specifically, is there’s taylor the person and Taylor™️ the brand. Taylor™️ the brand makes money. she can be whatever she wants in her personal life. the problem is when Taylor™️ the brand is putting out a song about herself with one or two throwaway lines that are either just ambiguous or are intentionally placed to make the song seem ambiguous and claims it’s a queer anthem, during pride month, and then never again is just straight up rainbow capitalism at best. but the songs she releases and only claims later they’re from the pov of a man when questioned if it’s about her expressing queer feelings because The Brand, that’s queerbaity to me. she seems fine letting fans praise her and hail her as a queer icon when it benefits her until it stands to affect her perception to her conservative fanbase, and then she tells the truth that’s it’s from the pov of a man. does this make sense? like things like that feel deliberate. there’s a couple she hasn’t spoken on to my knowledge, but for those specific two instances, it feels like rainbow capitalism and queerbaiting as Taylor™️ the brand that makes money off of people like gaylors who obsessed over her sexuality and “hints” she may be queer.

I can’t speak to other situations with other celebs, this is just my perspective on taylor specifically, and it’s totally okay if you disagree.

#Asks #anonymoose #anti taylor swift #swifties dni #thank you for the apology though

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nii-chans-rabiddogs · 2 years ago

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Answers?

No TWs as far as I'm aware :). sorry for the wait, ADHD wanted to watch ppl play horror games lmao

@cupcakes-and-pain @maracujatangerine here ya go <3. Set before Promotion?

The detective wasn’t answering any of my calls, which is odd. I know he’s been pretty focused, but it doesn’t make the sudden ghosting make sense. He hasn’t even showed up for Burger time, and his coworkers said he’s busy trying to get a promotion. Apparently he’s been trying for a while now. I’m not sure why he needs one, though, cuz he can pay for really cool clothes for me and weekly burger times, so it’s not like he’s short on money. I think, at least. I haven’t been to his apartment ever, so maybe he’s just using all of his money on other stuff?

“Ghost? How long have you been sitting in Gunner’s office?” Oh, it's the secretary person. I like how red her hair is, it’s like apples or a lighter shade of blood. She’s nice, and doesn’t scream when I bring my little critters in.

“I dunno, like an hour or so. Why? Also, has Detective responded yet? I haven’t seen him in like a whole week, which isn’t very long but he missed Burger time, and that’s just illegal. He’s never done this before, what if he doesn’t come back? Wait, he has to, he works here. Can I have a snack, please? There’s only fruit gummies in here and those are the worst. Is Mr. Detective Gunner Sir Bossman okay? I don’t like that he’s ignoring me.” I asked, staring at Ms. Secretary and playing with the rubix cube I pulled from the drawer. Detective is really likes to get things for people, I think, cuz the one unlocked drawer always has toys and snacks, but he hasn’t been restocking it, cuz the only things left are gummies and gummies are evil.

Ms. Secretary just smiled and said she’ll get me another snack, that’s nice. She didn’t answer if the Detective that is Gunner had responded or reappeared, though, and it’s weird. Why does nobody say anything? I just wanna know what’s going on. Then they get mad at me, when they refused to say anything in the first place. If you don’t want me snooping around, don’t be so cryptic and rude.

Wait, I can just find answers myself. I forgot about that, but whatever. Detective is always here during work hours but I’m sleeping then usually, so maybe if I stay up later to watch for him? Then I can hop in his car while he’s busy and he’ll take me to wherever he’s been hanging out at. I get a free car ride, and find out where he’s been. The car ride is the best, because I can just sit and stare out the window and nobody expects me to do or say anything. It’s really nice and even better when the window is rolled and the air is rushing around the car. I like the wind, it feels really nice against my face. Makes me feel like I can fly, and wouldn’t that be so cool? I wanna fly, just hang out in the air and float around the city. No one would ever be able to reach me and-

Ms. Secretary walks back in, with a box of chocolate pretzels and I immediately zero in on them, dropping the rubix cube. Chocolate pretzels are the best, better than everything ever. She hands them to me, and tells me to “take care of yourself, kiddo” like I'm not a whole eighteen years old, and walks back out. Actually, wait, my birthday is tomorrow, so I’m almost nineteen! Maybe I can get Detective to tell me what he’s been up to all this time? It would be nice to know, cuz Detective has been gone for forever, and before that he was snappy and almost yelled at me which was scary. I hope he’s better now, I hate it when people yell. Makes me think I’m gonna get locked in the freezer again, and it's the worst feeling ever. But Detective wouldn’t do that to me, cuz he said he wouldn’t and Detective doesn’t lie. Unless it’s to the weird Feds, then he does, but never to me.

I shove another pretzel in my mouth and stare at the picture of Detective and his car. Wait, I can use that. He only has one car, unless he uses one of the precinct vehicles, and he wouldn’t use a precinct vehicle if he wants to hide, would he? Those are always tracking, said one of his friends, so they're not good for hiding. His car is a dark blue, which is the best color, but it also has some neon green and pink on the top from when I found some paint and got bored. On a side note, I’m no longer allowed to be unsupervised around paint or glitter. Rude. Anyways, there’s bright paint on the top, and I can just run around the rooftops until I find his car! It’ll haveta be somewhere, and even if I don’t find it I can go back to my warehouse. Wait, maybe Detective is near there? The warehouses are really nice to hide stuff in cuz they’re so big, and also no one ever checks on them without an actual, important reason. It’s nice, I never get bothered.

I chomp into the last pretzel, and get up to throw the box away. Chocolate pretzels never last long, they should make bigger boxes and I should get them for free. I meander out of the precinct, towards the apartments. The fire escapes there are always unlocked, and no one ever cares as long as I don’t stop on any of the landings. The apartment building itself is cool, all brick, and it's painted purple and green. It has people at the doors though, so I haven’t been able to enter it, sadly. Oh well, I’ll get in eventually. The fire escape is rusty and creaky and old, but it can be quiet if you’re really, really careful. I walk around to the alleyway that leads to the fire escape, then climb the stairs. Normally I’d just launch myself up but last time Detective yelled at me, so I don't wanna do it again. He said he was just scared for me, but yelling is really scary, too, so I dunno what he’s talking about. It’s not like I would fall either, cuz I was doing that since forever but now I can’t.

I finally reach the roof, and start running to the opposite edge. I jump at the very edge of the building, and land in a roll on the next building. I like jumping roofs, it’s fun and no one follows you, and it’s really, super fast if you know where you’re going cuz no one can stop you and nothing is in your way. Except maybe a fence sometimes, but it was really dark and raining that time so it’s not my fault that I fell off the roof. But fences aren’t common, so it’s easy to remember where they are and how to avoid them. Why would you put a fence on the roof? It just gets in the way and makes everything harder. It’s not like roofs ever hold anything important or expensive, y’know? It’s rude and in-con-sid-er-ate. I can say the best words, can’t I?

I slow down just a bit, cuz I can see my warehouse now, so I don’t need to go as fast. It has nothing to do with how hard I’m breathing, not at all. I glance around at some of the neighboring warehouses, but I can’t see very well, so I move to jump to the next roof. I spend a while running around checking everything out, but I still don’t see Detective’s car. I do find Muffin’s Marvels, so obviously I go down to ask for a cake. What the heck?! Why’re they closed, it’s not even that late. Wait, what time is it anyways? I pull out my little flip phone and see that it’s 11:53 PM. Oh, I’ll be nineteen in seven minutes, fun. I trot away from the cake shop, heading towards my warehouse. After getting back on the roofs, of course. I jump roofs, until I spot a flick of green in the corner of my eye. I land wrong, and my ankle is not happy about that, actually. After making sure I didn’t shatter my bones, I peek over to try and find the green I saw. I can’t find it from here, so I jump down into the mattress that has never been moved from the dumpster it's in. It’s still pretty good though, just stinky. I wander through the alleyway, trying to find any green at all. I don’t find anything, but there’s a weird shed thingie next to a warehouse so I go to check it out. It looks old and weird, like everything else. People really like to abandon stuff in abandoned places, it’s weird. Maybe they’re trying to make the abandoned place look nicer, but honestly it just makes me feel like someone was forgotten, and that makes me really sad so I don’t think about it anymore. Wait, isn’t that Detective’s car? Why is it hidden? And why so late?

Well, I know how I was able to see it at the very least. There isn’t a roof on this shed. Why would you place your car here, it’s not even protected that well, yknow? I wanna explore more, but my phone beeps at me, the alarm Detective set on it going off. Aw, I don’t wanna go to bed now, I just found the Detective. I pout at my phone until I let out a yawn and remember I have chocolate milk at my warehouse. I’m only going back for the chocolate milk, not because I’m tired, not at all. I never get tired, ever. I don’t trip, or get tired, or anything ever cuz I’m just that good. Obviously.

I finally reach my warehouse, and immediately grab my chocolate milk from the cooler Ms. Secretary gave me. It’s filled with ice, and keeps my chocolate milk cold so it doesn’t get gross and icky. Also warm milk is an abomination and anyone who warms their milk up willingly is wrong and gross and icky and should be jailed forever. I twist open the cap, sipping some as I flop onto the little bed-nest I made when I first found this place. My bed-nest is the bestest bed ever, cuz it’s warm and soft, and it has all sorts of colors. Blue is still the best color, but I like it when things have lots of colors, too, cuz it’s always fun to look at. I yawn again, laying further back and drinking the rest of my chocolate milk. I’m not tired at all, no siree. These blankets are just really warm and soft and nice, and I can’t help but nuzzling into them. Detective can wait until tomorrow, after all. He won’t mind.

#Ghost #Detective #Ms Secretary #ghost forgot her name so shes forever Ms Secretary #also this story in general isnt going the way i thought it would #which is fine but now im also waiting for the author to update and hes taking his damn time #lmao #anyways have ghostie boy searching for his detective #also fun fact! Ghost only learned his actual birthdate when detective Gunner learned about ghostie's legal name #Before that Ghostie only knew that it was sometime in august #His birthday is August 17 btw #if you really wanna know #<3 #<33333

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rosedosed · 1 year ago

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🌻 🌻 🌻 !!!!!

HIIII HI HI THANK YOUU 🥰

1. There’s Talks about two friends and me moving in together and though I’m a little careful (I’ve seen many friendships torn apart after becoming roomies) I’m CAUTIOUSLY VERY EXCITED!! I currently live in a small studio apartment with very little interaction between the housemates and I love a little personal space but Bro I Miss being having roommates. I don’t mind getting most of my social kicks from going out and meeting people but going on holiday I’m always hit with how pleasant it is to live with a whole bunch of friends around me at all times.

2. Jumping off 1^, I’ve also noticed I benefit a lot from having people around me as an artist. Art and writing (my big passions) are incredible but they’re also very SOLITARY experiences. I’ve noticed that many artist-influencers (especially on tiktok) are really good at editing their videos to make it seem like art is a quick, fun, relaxing and social process, but in practice art-creation takes fucking hours and usually those hours are spent in isolation. As much as I want to draw for the rest of my life, I notice that sitting hunched over a tablet for half a day without having people around me to pull me back to earth when I get too lost in the sauce just isn’t super good for my mental health, so I cannot wait to move into a home with palz and Exist & do Art Together

3. Now that I’m already monologuing lets make it 3/3; I notice that many artists stop drawing as much as soon as they leave high-school/adolescence. This is super understandable (adult life is busy as hell) but many of them (me included) are a little sad about it. Here’s what I’ve done to remedy this a little bit & keep drawing consistently as an adult;

Figure out why art appeals to you, figure out why you gravitated towards art, why you need it, and then listen to that need. If you create art to tell stories; tell stories. If you create art to make money; sell merch or take commissions. If you create art purely for yourself; DO THAT. If you wanna retain a hobby make sure you still do it for you. And if you find out that you don’t really feel the need to create art anymore don’t you dare resent yourself for it that’s fine. You’re not defined by what you create, you’re defined by what drives you & if creating art doesn’t drive you that’s totally fine you can do whatever you want forever! 💖

Find your Artist Identity Sweet Spot. I, for example, don’t find the life of a full-time freelance artist appealing. It sounds stressful and not suited to my needs, that’s why I combine it with two other part-time jobs and never refer to myself as an artist in a commercial way. What’s more, I try to make space for art as a social activity to meet my extroverted needs. Live drawing! Collaborations! Art-dates! Figure drawing! The lifestyle of the solemn solitary artist just doesn’t suit my golden retriever ass no matter how much I thought it had to, and the sooner I figured that out the sooner I could work to fit art into my life more comfortably. Don’t try to fit some arbitrary artist mold. It doesn’t exist and it’s only gonna make you sad. There is no The Artist, there is only YOU; THE ARTIST.

Speaking of you; draw for YOU I cannot overstate this enough. Appeal to YOURSELF and you’ll always have an audience. Cringe culture is FAKE. Online art discourse is a BLACK VORTEX. Following your passions is BASED and you have to do it RIGHT NOW. I’ve been unabashedly drawing SELF-INDULGENT TTRPG CONTENT for an audience of 7 for the past 2 years and I’m so in my own front-seat about it. I’m much happier than I was trying to appeal to ppl who only appreciated my art when I deliberately tried to cater to them. I promise; if you feel like people’s expectations are limiting you in what you truly want to do; there’s people out there who will truly appreciate your work and trying to cater to those who don’t is only gonna piss you off in the long run. Draw whatever makes you happy I don’t give a fuck what it is as long as it makes you happy.

Sorry for talking so much here’s a picture of a mural I saw yesterday

#answers #cluusheen #idk where this RANT came from SOREY

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xxjazzxx · 2 years ago

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///long vent (these always seem to happen around my birthday oddly)

I admit I wasn’t always the best person, especially in my early 20s. If you knew me then you’d probably be really fucking surprised at how much of a personality change it’s been over that course in time.

But most of that was self hatred, ignorance, and self destruction enabled by those I hung out with.

Anyways what spearheaded this vent post was someone anonymously texting me trying to start shit and I was like “seriously?” So yeah someone’s still running their damn mouth about me it seems.

Honestly right now all I do is mind my business and don’t fuck with ppl anymore that I don’t vibe with. Simple shit.

At this point ppl can think whatever the hell they want to. Also I am aware I’m not owed forgiveness for bridges burned, things said, and done. That’s perfectly fine because on my end I certainly haven’t forgiven ppl even though they have changed or apologized to me.

But what you won’t do, is bother me, have others check up on me, or spread unnecessary rumors. All of that is annoying and I’ll shut it down if need be. Don’t piss off ppl who have dirt on you btw.

But overall my 20s was a shit show and that’s over now. I can’t change anything I’ve done but simply learn from it and grow, which those who have stuck around have seen and supported me on. Though I will run into the “you shouldn’t have done it in the first place though” crowd, it’s expected. But for me, I’ve made efforts to change myself and not make those poor choices again.

Also even though taking into account that being autistic doesn’t help with thought processes or how to navigate certain behaviors, it is never an excuse to be a horrible person to others and I’ll never fall back on that as a reason.

So it is what it is. Anyone new who comes across me can make their own judgments and stick around if they want to. I also am not influencing or telling others who they should or shouldn’t be friends with, but if you’re gonna try to downplay any feelings of mine, you ain’t welcome to my circle.

That’s all.

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bee-cried · 2 years ago

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Welp

I'm a slut for this fic

Expand this post at ur own risk

but i warned you and you're still here

interesting🤔...

🤭

i wonder how sbj feels about fic written for her story? That's why I don't like tagging these posts with the mth tag because I feel like that's both rude and like...

I don't know.

If I made a fanfic for a show I loved, shipping my favorite characters, and I felt like all the ships are basically otp, just for someone who's read my story and liked it, to come and rewrite it to fit their original characters in it, I'd feel... quite odd to say the least. 😐

But I wanted to post this because I was going to post art but it's too late and I don't feel like drawing. I hate drawing rn. It is what it is.

If SBJ ever does come across this post and she's not with it, I will take this down because I get it. It's her idea.

But weird confesstion time: I think I'm more of a fan girl for MTH than PPG at this point. Does anyone else feel this way? :I

I think Racket admitted that once, I don't know, don't "quote me" but.... yeah...

I've been reading this fic since 2014, dead ass, and when I tell you guys I've literally been rewriting the entire story to make my own AU

I'm not lying. It's... very strange, I know :(

okay very weird confession time over. I'll regret that in the future lol.

---

So before the story -i'm going to get to it, I promise- I just wanna explain the premise here.

Such as SBJ has aged up the ppg and rrb, I've done the same for my characters.

In a very odd sense, Lillian Bella ,and Jenna are remarkably similar to Bubbles, Buttercup and Blossom.

In many ways, such as the way they interact with each other, their personalities and blah, you'll see what I mean as you read the bit I'm posting.

But I'm dead ass when I say, I made my characters way before I read more than human.

Their personalities did shift though because of other things that influenced me. Such as, Lillian is literally Cat Valentine TM and I know ppl say that Bubbles is also Cat but no-

I have based Lillian off of cat since like 2015. before the conversation for Bubbles started online.

Lol but whatever, these characters do read as rip offs :( i'm sorry.

Lastly, Lillian and Boomer where in a relationship. In this AU Lillian is basically the stand in for Hailey, and the break up made her fall on her ass hard. So yeah, maybe one day i'll repost that "chapter" where u can obviously tell she's trying to ask Boomer out before he inevitably goes for Bubbles.

Sorry Lillian girl, but the blues are fate 💅🏾

so ALLLLLLLLLLLLL that aside.

here's the damn thing, with a lack of attention to spelling and grammar. it's based off of chapter 10 when the boys get sick.

---

Bella flew on her back as she guided Jenna and Lillian though the sky.

“They live right over there, beyond the other apartment complex,” she ordered them, “see?”

Lillian squinted into the distance, “Wow, you really do have good memory.”

“I’m your fucking sister, you should know this first.”

Jenna flew before them, “Come on, I don’t want to be over here too long. The professor should be on his way.”

“Oh, the Professor’s coming? I haven’t spoken to him in awhile,” Bella said.

“He was at the Introduction dance the other day,” her twin responded.

“I know, but we never got to say hi. Too busy bothered with… other things.”

“Like going to the boy’s house?” Jenna asked.

“Precisely.” Bella nodded.

They continued to chat as they neared the complexes. Talking eased Lillian’s nerves at least. Eventually they made it in front of the door. Jenna knocked.

“Go the fuck away,” Butch’s voice said, hoarse.

“Butchy boy, I brought you a present.” Bella said in a singy songy voice.

“Bella?” he muffled. There was faint shuffling before the locks of the door opened. It cracked as Butch peered.

“You actually came?... and Wow, you really did bring a special gift,” he said, oggling the other two girls. “Too bad I’m too sick to enjoy-”

“Butch let us in, we came to fix you,” Bella ordered bowling open the door.

He stumbled aside as they walked in, “That’s one way to ask if you can come in I guess.” His slacked expression drifted to Jenna as she crossed the threshold. She didn’t notice him starring.

“This place is huge,” she marvelled.

“So is my room, you wanna check that out?” Butch offered.

Bella snorted, “You’re literally crippled right now, and you think Jenna want’s anything to do with you?”

Butch was determined, but Jenna moved along the apartment, more interested in the layout and design.

“Butch” a throaty deep voice croaked from a lump on the couch, “I thought I told you to shut up. Why are you inviting fucking guest over?”

Lillian immedeatley turned her head. Boomer was turned to the couch he lay on, blanket over his head.

“Boomer, we’ve got ladies,” his brother grinned.

“I don’t care,” Boomer groaned.

“Don’t worry Boomer, we’ll be out of your hair in no time,” Jenna reassured him. She stood a bit rigid in the dining area, “We’re just waiting on your brother to come so we can get this process over with.”

“You sure you don’t want to stay for the hot tub?” Butch rose a brow.

Lillian was amazed. “You guy’s got a hot tub?”

At the sound of her voice, it seemed the Boomer lump went stiff.

“Sure, if you guys stay over,” Butch sniffled.

Lillian considered, “Mmmh. No thanks, maybe some other time.”

“Think about it,” Butch muttered.

“I’m thinking about how the fuck you guys are survivng off of just silverware and cereal.” Lillian and Jenna turned to Bella who was scouting their kitchen. “What the fuck are you guys even eating in here? Do you share this?” She shook the cereal box she was indicating.

“Get out of their kitchen,” Jenna ordered.

“No. How about I go get food for their kitchen.”

“Volunteering to be a personal butler?” Butch peered up.

“You’re real funny,” Bella muttered opening their fridge. “I’ve got my own butler to demand around. I cant have a butler and be a butler. That’s just silly.” Just then the front door opened and everyone turned to.

Buttercup and Bubbles stood in the doorway, laddened with grocery bags.

“Huh. I’ve gotta make sure I lock that thing more often,” Butch noted to himself.

“Welcome to the party,” Bella said from the kitchen.

Bubbles instantly rushed to Boomer as Buttercup dropped her groceries, “I didn’t even know we were having one.” Butch helped himself to her bags.

“What brings you guys?” Jenna asked. Bubbles was sat on the edge of the couch, comforting her sick boyfriend.

“We’ve bout some stuff to help the boys feel better in the meantime. I’m cooking soup.”

“You’re going to cook for us?” Butch said, a sparkle in his eye.

“Don’t get too happy. I’m just doing this as a friend.”

“Oh Buttercup, you really are the bestest friend in the whole wide world.” Butch moaned blearily.

“Uh huh.”

“Hey! what about me?” Bella called from the kitchen, closing the fridge door. “I came to help as well.”

“Help raid our pantry?” Butch offered.

“No,” Bella replied back just as snarky, “Help bring my sister so that she can make you guys feel better faster.”

“She’s telling the truth,” Jenna sighed, pulling out a chair for herself, “Lillian is here to help with recovery. But aside from that I have no clue why Bella tagged along.”

“Emotional support.” she said as if it were obvious.

“Guy’s I don’t mean to be a mood killer,” Bubbles said gently from the couch, “but Boomer say’s that he’s really tired and he’d like some rest.”

The room replied with various apologies before ending the conversation. Having nothing else to distract him, Butch eventually fell back asleep on the floor as Buttercup began assorting the groceries, the other girls offering their help alongside her.

------

LAtEr

aye

THIS PART IS LITERALLY SBJ'S WRITING. WORD FOR WORD.

I am just showing off the parts I added in, to show the general vibe of how I weave in my story.

Read More than Human it's better anyway lol :)

continuing

---

“How are you feeling?” Bubbles asked as she poured a fresh glass of water for Boomer and carried it over to the couch. “Any better?”

“I guess. At least until you leave.” He grinned weakly at her, and she smiled.

“Ugh, now you’re making me sick,” Buttercup gagged from the kitchen. Lillian had just finished chopping the carrots and dumped them into the bowl beside her. Jenna was washing dishes and Bella made use with Butch’s playstation portable in the meantime.

Bubbles shot a disapproving look over her shoulder. “Nobody asked you to stay,” she retorted, and Butch raised his hand from where he laid on the living room floor.

“I asked,” he pointed out. “Because Boomer didn’t feel like playing with me. ‘Go play with yourself,’ he said.”

“Hey,” Boomer warned, eyes narrowed. “We got ladies in the house.”

“Ladies cooking for you, no less,” Buttercup muttered under her breath as she set a pot of water to boil. “A little help, Bubbles?”

She picked up the bowl of vegetables Lillian had just chopped up for her. “Well, at least I got some help. Thanks, Lillian,” she mumbled giving her sister a pointed glare.

Lillian giggled, “It’s no problem. I love cooking.”

“I can tell. You did good with these.” She shuffled the bowl around inspecting the cuts she was granted with.

As she did so, Lillian went to chop some onions, quietly keying on the conversation in the livingroom.

Bubbles looked down at Boomer and smiled again. “Drink your water.”

The look on his face was apprehensive. “Don’t leave me. What if I drown?”

Bubbles stifled a giggle and tried to look serious. “You’re going to drown in that cup of water?”

“I’m very sick, you know. It could happen.”

“You’re just… you’re so silly!” Bubbles laughed, and leaned down to kiss him on the forehead.

“Hey, how come I don’t get any kisses?” Butch sounded upset.

“Bubbles! Help much?!” Buttercup snapped. “Seriously, for Christ’s sake!”

“Alright! Keep your shirt on,” Bubbles grumbled, squeezing Boomer’s hand before heading for the kitchen.

“Please don’t,” Butch said hopefully. “Please don’t keep your shirt on.”

Buttercup pitched a dish towel at him.

Bella who had headphones on and was sat at the dining table, removed one muff not taking her eyes off of her game, “Are you guys seriously talking about fucking while the boys are sick?…. Because that would be actually sick.”

“Put your headphones back on,” Buttercup grumbled pulling out a spoon.

“No. I want in on this. If the room is in favor of an orgy, I am too.”

“But didn’t you just say that was sick?” Lillian blinked innocently as she peeled her onion. Bella was too distracted by the game in her hands to answer.

“She is no help,” Buttercup mumbled.

“Trust me Buttercup, her being occupied with the game is the greatest help you’ll get from her in this situation.” Jenna said nonchalantly drying a dish and setting it aside.

“Yeah, Bella’s pretty bad in the kitchen,” Lillian giggled, thinking furtively back to her sister's many kitchen atrocities.

Bubbles had joined her side. She was bright, “Ooh! Blossom’s not good as well. I guess we all aren’t so different after all.” she said giddy.

Lillian quietly looked at her as Bubbles, chipper, reached for a knife herself. She decidedly moved her cutting board to the other counter where Jenna was apart of, “Yeah, maybe so,” she said in a quiet voice. Bubbles blinked.

Some tomatoes was set in front of her.

“Get to chopping,” Buttercup ordered.

Bubbles rolled her eyes lightheartedly and began chopping up a tomato, all the while she cast Lillian a distrait look over her shoulder.

--And lastly, closure between Lillian and Boomer--

Lillian was the last at the boys house. As awkward as it was arriving, eventually with the day panning along she’d loosened up and got more comfortable.

After the girls left, Jenna surely left. She checked on Brick before leaving though, but he’d been asleep. Lillian noticed she’d been glancing at Brick’s door all day, especially when Blossom was in it.

After she left, the professor showed up. He was very delighted to see Lillian and Bella. They talked for a while, shared pleasantries, and then he did his part before waving goodbye. Bubbles had waved too and thinking back to the hard time Lillian was giving her today, she granted her a small wave back feeling a bit guilty.

Eventually, Bella fell asleep at the table as night fell and Lillian worked on her personal remedy that she needed to give to the boys before she left.

She looked at her glowing hands and sighed, then casted a look at the living room. Boomer and Butch had left for their rooms. She thought about calling them out, but figured their day was hard enough and shook out her nerves before starting off-

“Want me to go with you?” Bella mumbled beside her. Lillian blinked to her.

“No. It’s fine.” she mumbled before starting for Brick’s room.

Brick was asleep luckily for her, so she made his visitation quick, so was Butch. Boomer’s room was the door she hesitated in front of. The soft sleep of her sister was just beyond her, like a personal reminder to get a move on.

Lillian swallowed thinking back to the one and only time she got a glimpse of his room. It was a Nirvana poster and an acoustic guitar, and it stayed that way and it was perfect that way when she thought about it.

She placed a reluctant hand on the knob and twisted very gently, easing the door open as not to make a sound.

He said nothing.

She opened the door a little more and shuffled in, trying not to be so awkward about this. She got a good look of his space. There were posters plastered everywhere, mainly blonde girls and rock stars. She noted those blonde girls specifically though, and wondered, grudgingly, what he’d ever saw in a girl like her?

His room was a little messy, not as wild as Butch's but messy nonetheless. He was lied on his bed turned to the other wall with a window shining dimly behind curtains. It was dark, but she didn't want to wake him up so she used the light around her to her advantage.

When she reached him, she halted, hovering above him a bit. She felt her stomach doing cartwheels.

He slept very peacefully on his side. He didn't snore or breath heavy, he just lay real still, blankets pulled over him.

her hands tingled to touch him with the remedy. She took a deep breath and reached out for his shoulder-

He turned. Lillian wretched her hand back and gasped.

His eyes were open but heavy.

"You're still here?" He asked, surprisingly nonchalant. His voice was still sore, she could hear it, but it was also drowsy.

"I'm… I'm here to help you." Lillian whispered. "Get better."

"Mhh," he hummed. Then he sniffles. "You're not gonna get sick?"

"I'm immune to the virus naturally," she said fiddling with her fingers.

"Oh. Sweet," he muttered.

She touched his shoulders feeling how incredibly warm he was. It was worrisome, though all the boys had that temperature tonight. The light in her hand navigated slowly through his body.

As she waited for the remedy to pass through, she cleared her throat, a bit awkward. "H-how long were you up? Are you okay? Do you need water or…anything like that?"

"No. It's okay." Boomer croaked. "I wouldn't want to bother you."

Lillian looked simultaneously confused and frustrated, "why would that be bothering me?"

"Because like… you still sort of hate me and all."

Lillian went quiet. She bit her lip looking down. She didn't hate Boomer but…

But maybe she was being a jealous friend.

She sighed shaking her head, "Boomer, I don't hate you." She said softly. She looked at him, "I'm sorry for making you feel that way."

He coughed and looked down, "You don't have to apologize."

It was quiet for a moment before Lillian muttered, "I feel like I should."

It was quiet again.

"Well whatever I did, I'm sorry too," Boomer mumbled.

"That's the thing," she mumbled. A horrid sense of guilt began to wash over her as she looked down at her shoes. "That's the thing about this entire situation. You've done nothing. You don't deserve to feel bad because I'm upset. It's just not right and… I'm being a bad friend trying revolve everything around me." She blinked, sadly, "I'm-... you're not in the wrong here."

Boomer looked at her. She didn't catch the gaze he casted her.

“Sorry,” she finally breathed.

His hand was hot as it clasped around the wrist of the hand healing him. She finally looked up into his eyes, though sick, ironically warm.

“Me too.” He said, his voice soft like a whisper. “About…everything. About how it all went down.”

She could tell, he was talking about something different. Deeper than her entire petty dilemma, and that struck something within her. Something regretful.

Was this the only closure she was going to get? A tragic one?

As she looked into Boomer’s eyes, recalling the look of admiration he once gave her that he now gave to another girl, she came to a stubborn realization.

That perhaps she was asking too much from a boy. A simple boy, who only wanted to move on, and for some reason she wanted to keep him forever. It could simply be that she needed to let him go and appreciate the extension of friendship he offered her over and over again.

Even when she ignored it. Even when she hated him for it.

The pressure of his hand went slack as he began to drift unconscious, probably too exhausted to keep up with the conversation he engaged with her in the first place.

She stood by his bedside, hand on his shoulder and her heart heavy.

***

Bella shook her head awake as a tap came to her shoulder.

“We can go now. I’m all done,” Lillian whispered.

Bella made a loud ‘Phew’ sound that Lillian immediately, sternly, shushed amidst the various snoring in the house. Bella stretched to get up, “You were taking forever, what time is it?” she yawned.

Lillian tugged her phone out, light briefly illuminating her face, “It’s 11:20.”

“Whoo! We just stayed past curfew at the rowdyruff boys house,” Bella cheered. Lillian winced.

“Go. The fuck. Home.” A dark voice muttered from Brick’s room. Both twins looked to his door.

“We should go.” Lillian whispered hurriedly, to her sister as she steered her out.

“But I wanted another bowl of that soup-”

“Come on,” Lillian said, pushing her out the door. She locked the bottom, even if it seemed futile to do so, out of respect for their privacy, and possibly to discourage her sister from trying to get back in.

---

okay- that's it. i'm done lmao

if you stuck around this long, thanks for reading!

oh and, for reference, if it matters, I have pictures of Lillian, and Bella but not Jenna so

Jenna is brown skin, I can't decide on her eye color atm but she has long dark auburn hair.

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thestarsanctuary · 4 years ago

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hi! I was hoping you could do a Bakugo, Midoriya, Todoroki and Kirishima (separate) with an s/o that has Tourettes, preferably they/them pronouns please. I hope you're having a good day <3

Of course! I was gonna take a break in the middle of my (unspoken) break aka me being lazy, but this request was so nice I- I had to 😔✋🏾 it was definitely the heart. It got me.

MHA BOYS WITH AN S/O THAT HAS TOURETTES

TW FOR ODD LOOKS AND STARES/BULLYING(ISH)

BAKUGO

Bakugo wasn’t really sure when he first met you about why your head was twitching or why you were repeating the sentences Aizawa had said sometimes, as he didn’t know you had tourettes. He never even spoke to you like the others did so you never had the chance to tell him until Kirishima did.

When you two started dating he started seeing patterns of when you would get to stressed and start jerking or spouting out random things you heard from youtube videos, he did his best to make sure you knew he was there for reassurance, whether it was a hand on your hand or just pure presence.

There were times when you would have ticcing fits and he would have to sit and rub your back and watch you, and in those times you realized he really was there for you.

He likes to do this thing where he rants on about things he doesn’t like to try and distract you- I’m not sure how he has so much he doesn’t like but every time it’s a new odd topic....sometimes it can literally be something like how he hates trees because when it’s fall he has to rake up the leaves and you have to say

“Bakugo they literally help you not die.” It really is a mystery sometimes how he’s so smart.

Sometimes you can be a bit upset with your tics. It’s not that you’re insecure or that you’re ashamed, but they’re difficult to deal with. The control that you could have isn’t there and that’s stressful in and of itself, and in those moments Bakugo realizes the best thing he can do for you - is make you understand that you are just like the rest of the class and the rest of the people in the world.

“Listen it doesn’t matter if you’re different because to me you’re still cool, you’re still funny, you’re still incredibly sarcastic and while I don’t enjoy that for the most part- you’re my extra regardless of whatever you feel. Get that bull out of your head.”

I mean, he wouldn’t date anybody less than the best.

MIDORIYA

Midoriya is the predictable character in the relationship. He researched about Tourettes and what he could do in times when you needed him, I mean he’s not perfect but he’d rather know something rather than nothing.

You tended to be the one who was more of a risk taker, and sometimes your tourettes got in the way of that- which could frustrate you to no end then causing harsher tics like hitting or yelling, and those were the times Midoriya tried to get anything too dangerous either out of your hands- or just out of the way so you didn’t get hurt, he was smart with it.

Other times he could be too much for you, almost treating you like a kid so you had to remind him that you know and understand precautions, but that you also want to live like everybody else and that is nothing short of your business.

You’re favorite activity with him was when he would help you study because he made it so fun for you. It could be hard to pay attention in class sometimes and do your work after school so Izuku would come over and assist you. He would make sure you guys took breaks and that you understood the topic at your own pace.

“Izuku can you like- give an example?”

“Well it’s just kind of- wait what is an example-“

In many situations Midoriya LOVED holding your hand, like he did it at any time, any place. It was something he thought wasn’t too much in public and it was reassuring for you both. When you’re tics got too much you could squeeze his hand, and other times when he wouls get anxious or something would happen he would squeeze yours. It was cute and handy!

There were instances when Midoriya definitely had his mistakes with your tics and how to deal with them but he was willing to take his time and learn because who would he be without his perfect person stayin’ by his side?

KIRISHIMA

Kirishima is probably the most sympathetic with your tics because he stay prepared for them. It’s never been like “Kirishima can you” but it’s always been more like ‘Kiri how do you always know’ and there’s never been an answer that he gave other than ‘I gotta stay ready for my lovely lover~’

Kirishima likes to do this thing where he goes “neck” after you have a rough day with your tics and with massage your neck for you or your back, depending on how your tics were. He likes takin’ care of you, and it’s not like he doesn’t know you can’t take care of yourself because hey, you didn’t get into 1-A by being a pushover.

Sometimes you’ve had times when people in school just aren’t all that accepting and Kirishima will clap back unprovoked.

“Sometimes I think about how sad you have to be to make fun of them and dang man, you got a therapist?”

Other times you’ll basically respond for him, like I said, you can DEFINITELY take care of yourself.

Whenever you’re in the car or on the bus on a trip in the case that you’ve gotten real excited (which is natural being around your boyfriends and your friends at the same time) he’ll play this playlist he made of your favorite songs and sing to distract you. Does he sing well? That wasn’t the question- but he does sing, only for you though because the other students keep dissing him.

He has a reflex of rubbing your back during free period or at lunch. I don’t think this is relevant but it’s something super adorable, and sometimes he just gives you his hand to look at and play with when you have anxiety as well to keep you calm.

Also irrelevant but other times he’ll facetime you before you guys go somewhere and ask what to wear because he wants to match with you, and it’s so cute because you could lie so hard and he’d believe everything you say.

You two are kinda a power couple like- you both can hold your own but also are such nice people, good job makin’ the rest of 1-A feel lonely guys.

TODOROKI

Todoroki is a simple guy. He doesn’t want to overcomplicate things for the most part because “why would I act like your guardian, if I’m literally your boyfriend” and that’s that.

He tends to try and keep you calm, as it’s something pretty simple for him, he knows a bunch of tactics for distractions or when those are obsolete, he’ll just sit there with you, and maybe rub your back or get a water bottle for when it’s done, he just never wants to do too much because he knows your capabilities, and he knows your limits.

He is also a large hand holder. Mostly because he doesn’t like the idea of PDA for the most part, and he doesn’t like leaving your side either, because you’re very comforting to him. It’s a given we all know he needs love and comfort please.

There have been times when people look at your because of your tics in public and Todoroki has had to give a little glare back because of the disrespect being blatantly put out. In rarer times you will both glare at the same time, those are the coolest moments of you as a couple.

Shoto doesn’t really care much for your tics only because he’d rather just make sure you’re ok then watch Avengers rather than treat you like a child if anything, and that’s because you told him first that you wanted a boyfriend not a babysitter (speakin’ facts) and at first he didn’t understand and he thought you didn’t want his help but soon understood otherwise.

Some cute things I like to think of are that he likes to put on your favorite songs when you’re anxious and try to dance for you. It’s not good- let’s start with that, because he’s kinda...stiff, but the attempt is absolutely adorable (and oh so funny).

Other things are he likes to call you cheesy nicknames when you’re cuddling because he likes your reactions everytime, because according to him, yeah he said it himself, you are very adorable when annoyed. Don’t @ me!

Overall he just loves spending time with you whenever he can, you’re truly a safe-haven for him.

EL FIN

Alright tourettes is a real thing y’all, so I didnt make this rainbows n cupcakes bc im sure that’s not always how it is.

If anything in this is offensive or too much for somebody I can take it down and re-do it! I’m not too sure how it is bc it feels kinda repetitive but we’ll see I guess, and thanks to the person who requested my day was fine thanks 😩✋🏾.

I also included some things I like to do (play with hands and listen to music) because i have anxiety and I known that can worsen tics and can also come with tics (a lot of ppl with tics have adhd, anxiety, or some sort of disorder along with it)

- SS <333333

#bnha #bnha x reader #tourettes #tourette syndrome #mha x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto x reader #midoriya izuku x reader #izuku midoriya x reader #bakugo katuski x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #kirishima eijiro x reader #eijiro kirishima #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou x reader #todoroki x reader #midoriya x you #midoriya x reader #kirishima x reader

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ironmandeficiency · 4 years ago

Text

pedro boys + spending habits

word count: fuck if i know, wrote it thru the app

characters: din, marcus m, dave, pero, marcus p, oberyn, max, frankie, whiskey, maxwell, javier, ezra

a/n: idk what caused this to happen but it works i guess. hope they make sense

✨support my ko-fi✨

trust him with your money, your drink, your social security number, everything:

din. this man is barely scraping by on his own when you first meet him. when he adds the kid to the mix, he gets even more frugal than he already is with an old as sin ship that many people are surprised to see fly. he will have a policy of “you earn it, you choose what to do with it” and since he goes after most of (if not all) the bounties to keep you all alive, he has the final say in how most of the credits are spent. he does want you to have nice things though, so he makes sure to configure the budget to where you don’t have to pour your credits into the group’s survival money very often. it’s the least he can do. he’s very big on taking care of his people and will show that in small ways.

marcus m. he’s a single dad for a significant amount of time, he has no choice but to be responsible with his money. he has to take care of missy, keep them both fed and housed and healthy, and that’s not even touching on how expensive all of high school graduation and college will be once she gets there. he teaches missy very early in life how important money is bc he doesn’t want her to ever know how it feels to not have enough. he makes a considerable amount of money w the heroics tho so he can afford to responsibly splurge on you both, but not constantly. is very cautious abt the splurging becoming a habit

dave. yeah he may be a murderer, but he’s scary great at managing his money (to continue being able to murder). he’s got his ex wife’s alimony (that still pisses him off but that’s another story) and two girls he takes care of, there’s no other choice for him either. there’s never a worry about dave having a midlife crisis and spending money on some stupid dad thing (like a motorcycle or assless chaps or a country club membership) because he murders to keep his mind off that sort of stuff. files his taxes diligently every year the day tax season starts and will pass this wisdom to the girls.

pero. he’s very good at judging if you need something or not. if it can’t feed you, keep you healthy, kill someone, or protect you, you don’t need to buy it. definitely not a man who indulges in trinkets and frivolous things that do nothing but weigh down his horse and his person. will encourage this way of thinking with whoever travels with him to whatever extent he can, but won’t be a dick about it if you have something sentimental on your person. if it’s a necessity, he will splurge on a bed and bath at an inn but not much else for a while. cheap because he has to be

marcus p. i don’t think i have to explain this one so i won’t. no i’m not being lazy who said that?

maybe you’ll be fine if he’s in charge. maybe:

oberyn. being a prince (and himself), there are different ways this could go. he spends his money frivolously at brothels & on his daughters + other loved ones (as well as other luxuries) and doesn’t really seem to be the type to keep tabs on it all as he goes. but... he’s a prince in a prosperous kingdom and so there isn’t really a worry for money. he’s known as the red viper for many reasons, including his clever nature and the ease with which he can get what he wants thru whatever means necessary. if you want for something that he can’t buy, you know he will find a way to get it for you (which can be a problem sometimes).

max. he’s good with money in the sense of perpetuating capitalism — that’s the red flag here. hell, he’s gonna be investing into bitcoin and who knows what stock market bs & bc it’s max, of course you trust him. max can’t control the stock market tho, so sometimes things are a little iffy. it always evens itself out though, and you make sure in the future that he invests his money instead of your joint money. he’s still gonna share anyways, it just helps you have a little more peace of mind.

frankie. he just wants to take care of you, okay? you can’t fault him for that 🥺 he maneuvers his budget around to make sure he can do all these nice things for you while leaving his own needs unchecked, which isn’t okay. he just wants to provide for the ppl he loves the best he can, but the problem begins when he starts to think he isn’t doing enough. his insecurity & lack of self-worth (fueled by his guilt for “not being everything you deserve”) is what makes him agree to the Trip™️ in the first place. once he comes back & sees you frantic, only wanting him home and not giving a flying fuck about the money, does he realize that you’re devoted to him and not what he can do for you.

whiskey. working for statesman made him forget what things really cost bc he suddenly never had to worry again about not having enough money. being with someone that isn’t practically made of money will snap him back into reality. he looks at his bank statements and his balance occasionally, but our big spender cowboy hasn’t really counted money as something he worries about for a while. when he constantly showers you in expensive gifts (only the best for his baby, that’s his motto) and you tell him that he has to not do that bc he’ll go broke, he plays it off because he doesn’t remember having to worry. separate bank accounts are only because you want to make sure your money is being spent smartly (even though jack has offered constantly to pay for literally anything you need).

don’t give him anything you want to see again:

maxwell. as much as i love this dork, he’s absolute shit with money. when his business is falling apart (bc he made the stupid ass decision to buy the oil rigs no one wanted bc they weren’t producing oil), he throws it all into saving face and trying to make investors buy into something that isn’t there. what a smart business man would’ve done was liquidate his assets and possibly try to get into a business that will yield at least some profit. he does learn his lesson tho and eventually can be trusted with money, but even he is hesitant to do anything with the household finances. he’s a dreamer, and dreams and money are the same as oil and water.

javier. i know you’re possibly surprised but hear me out. he’ll go all in to get info, whether he’s spending american taxpayer money or his own money or anyone else’s, if it’s valuable info that can be bought, it’s gonna be bought even if he goes without groceries for the next two weeks. before being with you, it was booze and prostitutes and cigarettes that ate away at his checks outside of buying information. the only thing that really changed once you got together was the prostitutes and slightly less cigarettes and booze. however, when he goes back to laredo permanently, he’s perfectly capable of keeping his shit in line. he’ll balance every checkbook in sight and run a tight af ship.

ezra. this man is a scavenger by necessity, a con man by choice. he has a silver tongue and a roguish charm and pretty questionable morals; he’s not gonna have any issue with getting his hands dirty. he’s probably gonna use your joint money to try and pull a fast one on some unsuspecting stranger (“it’ll double our money,” he says, “it’ll be fine,” he says), but then said stranger will end up turning the tables and leave you both absolutely broke. yeah he will feel guilty, no doubt. the only problem is that he won’t take it as a “hey don’t do it again” lesson, it’ll be a “this is how i can improve for next time.” eventually you have to put your foot down and take control of the money and when he realizes that you’re improving your lives much better than he is, he will thank you for it.

all pedro character taglists: @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky @obirain @leias-left-hair-bun @themarcusmoreno @catsnkooks @captainrexstan @mackstrut @torradoza @simping-for-fives @stardustsunrisekisses @darthadeline @artemis61003 @majorshiraharu @getdookuedon @capricornrabies @max--phillips @darklingveracruz @book-of-anarchy @andysficrecs @purelypascal @whovianwar @lv7867 @hornystarwarsbisexual @kaermorons @princess76179 @pedropasscals @greeneyedblondie44 @seasonschange-butpeopledont @qhbr2013 if you don’t want to be tagged, lemme know!! the link to join is in my bio

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well-its-not-human-anymore · 4 years ago

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Touch starved/ hurt reader - hcs or scenarios the turtles? Reader super cool regarding friendship, like funny and open etc etc, but if someone tries to do anything that implies a bit more regarding romantic stuff they are kinda like oop- no. Reader is kinda jumpy and just freezes when someone’s they like does any kind of affection ( blushes a lot, try to run away and avoid those situations) people have taken them for granted which has make them a bit cold and defensive in that area- they want to be more affectionate ( which they know deep down it’s what they crave) but it’s kinda they are a scared / angry cat? Please, hope this makes sense, thank you

( also regarding looks and gender I think you can go with they/them so everyone can see a look but if themselfs in the scenario, and if you are going to any kind of skin ship, make the reader extremely defensive over their arms and tummy pls, I do love hugs but if anyone touches my hips I’ll try to get away so fast omg sbbtjfjdkdksn and I will just close off momentarily, I absolutely hate it, I’m more on the heavy side ( talk and chubby ) and if anyone’s touches the “giggly” parts I get extremely upset ( because of how ppl havemade fun of it over the years) and I think the boys would be very “??? What?” To that reaction cuz they didn’t think it was some thing bad to have? ( like a more soft and chunky/chubby body) because they haven’t been exposed long enough to society’s judgment or beauty standards ( I mean they know about! The ones who would have read more about it maybe it’s Leo and Donnie, but what I mean maybe they have never experienced something like this - themselfs irl) Eitherway this ask is already so long omg I’m sorry and thank you, if it’s too much you don’t have to do it, have a good night/ day!)

Okay first of all I love you and I would die for you. You are a perfect human being and there is literally no one else like you. Your body does a damn good job of keeping all of your organs in place and that's what matters. If anyone tells you different you rock their absolute shit.

And don't worry, I understood the request perfectly so no worries on that, I've got a similar body type except I'm really short. But I'm also super defensive over being touched or having those parts of my body perceived, so trust me when I say you're not alone. We be vibing with this together.

Now to the writing!

TMNT Headcanons

Boys reacting to a touch starved/defensive reader

Michaelangelo

Look man, our boy here is body positivity central, he thinks you look amazing and he wants everyone to know it

As far as you two go he's your best friend, your homie, your main man

So of course he's gonna wanna show you off, why wouldn't he?

He doesn't think you'd have a reason to not be okay with it, you've always been playful with him and his brothers

So obviously there's some widespread confusion once Casey gets tossed into the mix

All Mikey had done was reach behind him and snag you by the waist to pull you over

That was all

The words "and this is my best friend, y/n" never got the chance to leave his mouth

He was definitely not expecting you to squeak out in protest and scramble away from him as fast as humanly possible

Your face was burning red and you were clutching your sides, desperately trying not to bare your teeth in defence

Mikey couldn't help but feel heartbroken

Was there something wrong with him?

You sent Casey an unenthusiastic wave before turning on your heel and basically running out

Leaving a very confused orange turtle behind you

When he finally managed to catch up to you later you rushed to explain why you'd reacted the way you did

You couldn't stand his expression when you explained that no- you didn't think he was disgusting and no, he hadn't done anything wrong.

But he did seem baffled at you telling him that it was because you hated being touched there.

"Look Mikey, I've got no problem with the whole contact thing but you gotta give me a warning or something before you go around grabbing me. Okay?"

He was 100% fine with that

Anything to make you comfortable

But you both got to the point of being able to laugh at your reaction to the turtle trying to hold your hand

"Seriously Michaelangelo, I have a reputation to maintain. How am I supposed to do that when you're giving me feelings?"

Donatello

It completely baffled him

By all accounts it didn't make sense

You threw around compliments like you were playing hot potato and for whatever reason you'd always find someway to playfully flirt with him

But the second one of his brothers suggested something other than the innocent friendship the two of you had you would shut down completely

And coincidentally those types of comments were made at the most inconvenient times

Nothing screamed awkward more than you going stone cold and standoffish over a piece of pie

Bubbly and excited one moment, tossing around those positive affirmations to your favorite people

And staring murderously at an inanimate object the next

You were like an unsolvable rubix cube to him

But he was determined to figure you out

"Y/N?"

You didn't appear to be busy, just sitting on the haphazard bunk in your makeshift area with a book in your lap

The others had gone out on patrol and you weren't sure where Splinter was at that particular moment which left you and Donnie holding down the lair until they got back

The perfect time to approach the subject

"Hey y/n? Can I ask you something?"

His voice always got a little louder when you were alone, less afraid of being overheard. You looked up with a smile

"Fire away Dove."

His cheeks flushed in surprise

"uhhhhh... whydoyounotlikeme?"

You set your book down and leaned forward to stare at him

"Elaborate."

And he did, god he did, he did it at the speed of sound of course, but you caught every word

let me tell you, this boys heart broke for you when you told him that you did like him

you really really did

but the thought of being romantically involved with anyone made you shut down

Donnie assured you that it was fine

he'd wait for you as long as you needed

Raphael

Look, Raph knows a thing or two about being self conscious

out of all of his brothers he's the one who worries about his appearance the most

but you- holy shit he thinks you're the most amazing, perfect human in the world

so when he finds out that you hate being touched and that thinking about relationships makes your skin crawl he doesn't know whether to genuinely cry for you or punch someone in the mouth

both is okay

You'd always been very bold with your words and sometimes you'd even joke that you couldn't even tell when you were flirting with him

it just slipped out

and hearing that even though you could pull that off as easy as breathing and compliment all of them endlessly but you struggled to be comfortable in your own body?

that was a lot to unpack in one sitting

but the longer he sat with you and listened to you talk him through it the more he understood

sure, it was horrible

and he wouldn't likely stop thinking about hurting the people who'd done this to you (there'd be too many to count)

but you had a way of making him understand things

it was his favorite thing about you

"Uh- you know y/n, I uh- personally I think you look great. Like- all the time."

plz insert awkward finger guns here

there, your playful smirk was back and you were wiggling your eyebrows at him

"Awhhhh... is that Raph I see having feelings?"

Leonardo

he'd done enough listening and reading to know how society treated people who it thought was different

and he hated that you'd had to experience that for most of your life

when it came down to it and he saw that you had become particularly hard on yourself he took it upon himself to check in with you

that's how you'd started meditating with him

and you'd found it quite relaxing if you were completely honest

Leo told you that meditation was the best way to connect with your body and understand it

you hoped that in time you would understand what he meant by that

but the positive affirmations were doing something, so you'd take it

he'd always encourage you when you couldn't yourself

and always jump to your defense when the others got a little to out of bounds with their words

you still would noticeably flinch when touched without warning

they were all working with that

and he still found himself saddened that you'd recoil back into your protective walls if anyone mentioned anything inherently romantic

but you were coming around

and he was endlessly proud of you for that

Alright I hope I was able to get down what you were thinking. This one definitely took the most contemplating out of any of the requests I've gotten so I hope you like it!

#tmnt x reader #tmnt bayverse #tmnt headcanons #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raphael #tmnt donatello #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt 2k16 #request #ask response #askbox

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bakubitch-minusultra · 4 years ago

Text

Drugs (Bakugo Katsuki) Part 02

im back bitches not me writing part 1 thinking no one would read this shit and then coming back to tumblr with 30+ notes anywho part two because im thriving. Should I make a masterlist???? That honestly take so much work but like if someone wants to make one for me im down ;))) a n y w h o

-> Taglist (bc apparently ppl like my writing) @no1herothatlookslikeavillain @5sosfckss

It was five in the morning when a rather loud knock woke you up. Your eyes shot open but you didn’t bother to move out of the odd position you were laying in, hoping that whoever it was would just leave. But then the knocks got louder and a voice let out a string of curses that sounded like something you heard before. You groaned and got out of bed, not bothering to even check what you looked like before grumpily stomping out of your room and towards the door.

“Open up!”

“I’m coming calm the fuck down,” you shot back. You were tired and pissed that someone just had to come and wake you up this early on your day off. Grabbing the door handle you prepared to cuss out some rude mailman or sales person. But instead, you were greeted with a tired looking police officer and a seething pro hero who was none other than Dynamight. You stood there for what seemed like forever, just staring at them both stupidly. Why the hell would they need to come here? Before Bakugo could quip back at what you said the policeman interfered.

“Can we ask you a couple questions?”

“Yeah...sure,” your voice trailed off as you watched Dynamight pull out a small notepad out of the pocket of his hero suit as the police officer cleared his throat to catch your attention.

“We have reason to believe that you were at a party last night?”

“Yeah, I was.” As soon as the confirmation left your mouth Dynamight jotted it down and put the notepad away.

“Well everybody at that party was unfortunately found dead, except for you,” the officer said. He looked tired, as if he didn’t want to be here this early in the morning.

“We have permission to take you in for questioning as a suspect,” Dynamight said, moving closer to you as if to restrain you, but you retreated farther behind your door and gave them both a confused look. How the fuck do over fifty people die in the same house? The journalist inside you instantly wanted to write about it but your daydreaming was cut very short.

“What the fuck do you mean I’m a suspect? I didn’t do shit.” You exclaimed. You somehow hoped that this was just a prank and some camera crew would appear because this was insane. It was way too early for this and if anyone who knew about you found out about this all credit you’ve built up while writing would come crashing down.

“Listen if you don’t come willingly I will blast your ass so-”

“Dynamight please stay professional,” the officer stepped between you and Dynamight as you had a stare off. You weren’t backing down and neither was he. “If you do not come willingly then I will have to cuff you.”

You nodded to the officer before letting out a heavy sigh, putting your shoes on and shutting the door behind you. The walk to the police car was silent and you made sure to put your hood on to make sure you weren’t spotted by anyone familiar.

“Take her to the station, I’ll meet you there,” with that final order Dynamight spared you a glance before activating his quirk and catapulting himself into the dark blue sky. You ignored the officer's look of pity as you got into the back of the cop car, a setting you never thought you would have to witness first hand.

Your mind was buzzing and you had completely forgotten about the messy makeup still on your face or your morning breath. Instead, you were busy trying to wrap your head around what was happening. That lame party you went off of a drunken man’s word has ended with every party goer dead, except you. Something really bad must have happened sometime after you left but it still didn’t add up. How could not even one person have escaped whatever happened? Your first theory was drugs, someone could have drugged any of the food or drinks and you silently thanked your past self for eating before you came if that was the case. But if everyone died that would include the person who did the poisoning, which didn’t make any sense, unless it was some weird suicide..?

While you were wrapped up in your intense thinking, you didn’t notice you arrived at the police station until the officer opened the door for you. You got out silently and followed him into the building.

There was Dynamight, standing at the door, with his hands crossed and a mean glare on his face. Once he saw you and the officer he motioned for the two of you to follow him. You scoffed, not appreciating how everyone just seems to obey his every command. For a split second you wanted to challenge him but decided against it. You just wanted to go home.

The three of you made your way into a small room you assumed was for questioning, the officer motioned for you to sit down before tipping his hat to Dynamight and leaving the room. It was just you and the pro hero now. You crossed your arms and chuckled at how he turned the chair around and sat on it. It was comical to you how badass he was trying to be.

“So you think mass murder is funny,” he asked, his voice low as he leaned forward to get a better look at you.

“No, I think it’s funny how intimidating you’re trying to be.”

“Look little lady, I could be intimidating if I wanted to. I have other shit to do so we need to hurry this up.” He sighed, and ran a hand through his messy blond hair. “What time did you leave the party?”

“1:40 in the morning, around the time the news broadcasted you stopping a bank robbery, I do have to applaud you for staying out so late to protect the city.” The hero grunted and began writing on a blank sheet of paper. You rolled your eyes, hoping to get this done as soon as possible.

“Specialists on our team say that the deaths occured around two in the morning. Meaning that if you are telling the truth, something happened twenty minutes after you left.” Your eyes widened after hearing the new information. There was anxiety and confusion running through your body. If you left any later you could’ve been dead. But what could’ve happened in a mere twenty minutes. “Do you have an alibi?”

“Not really no, but I’m sure you can track my phone leaving the party and going home.”

“You sure do know a lot for a possible murderer,” he smirked, looking up for a split second before going back to writing. You sat up, a little pissed at how you were labeled a possible murderer, but then again you couldn’t be too mad. Looking from his standpoint you could definitely see how you look suspicious.

“I’m not a murderer, thank you very much. I’m a journalist.”

“So what’s a journalist doing at a party then?” For the first time that day, you felt embarrassed. Only because you knew the only reason you went was because of the shitty lead that was obviously fake...and because you were lonely.

“I was given a lead,” you responded, holding your head down. You weren’t going to let this pompous jerk see any vulnerability.

“Who was the lead and what was it?”

“They were anonymous; they gave me a tip about some highly classified items being up for auction,” did you just lie a little? Yes, you did. But it was just a small white lie, it didn’t matter. But when you saw him grin, you knew you were in for an earful.

“For a journalist you’re really naive.”

“Shut up.” You shot, beginning to get up before he stopped you.

“Just so you know I’m letting you leave. You don’t run shit around here,” you turned around to face him, flipping him off before leaving the room, and making sure to slam the door. You honestly didn’t know how so many people love him.

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kindofwriter · 3 years ago

Note

Hey there! My group of friends have been hardcore considering turning a passion project of ours into a real podcast, and I was wondering if you had any advice for newbies putting together a show. We’re a small, young team, but we have a lot of passion for our concept and some writing/sound experience under our belts. Do you have any tips regarding finding actors, the process of plotting, sensitivity readers, or anything else you’ve had experience with in your projects? Thanks for reading!

Ok, finally ready with this! Thank you so much for the question, I will try to share my ~wisdom~ in the following post, but feel free to ask any further questions!

How to start a podcast: 1. when you’re new and/or 2. when you have money!

1. It’s easier than you think! My first advice is to just go for it! Even if it doesn’t quite go as planned you’ll have fun, and it’ll give you great experience for whatever you want to work on next!

Casting:

I’m going to assume this is an unpaid project (hence the former part of this advice being for free podcasting!) but if that’s not the case please skip to section two!

When I can’t offer any form of payment for a project I like to use friends as a cast. Not because my friends deserve any less payment! But because I can pay them in free chips and credentials for their portfolios, and it makes me feel slightly less bad!

Ways to go about deciding which friends to cast: I was lucky enough to do a lot of theatre work in my first year of uni, so I already knew a lot of people who were interested in both acting and production work. You’ll probably come across several actors who think voice acting is beneath them, but who wants to be friends with those people? What I’m trying to say is: if you have friends who are interested in theatre they’ll probably be interested in this! Especially given the past year.

I also poached people from my DnD group, because I could already gauge their acting specialities from that, and I knew what kinds of things they were interested in based on which DnD campaigns they enjoyed best.

If you know anyone who is interested in public speaking, whatever you all those reading awards where you read aloud dramatically, or something like radio and TV presenting then they’ll probably also be interested and do a great job! The great thing about podcasts is that all you really need is someone with a good voice - they’re free to do whatever they like with the rest of their face as long as they’re reading the lines!

You can, of course, also put out a casting call. It’s very important that you make it clear that it would be unpaid work. Even if you plan to set up a kofi, patreon, or kickstarter (info in the money section!), if you don’t have the money to begin with you shouldn’t promise it to people.

There are up and downsides to both. Casting people you know means you’re more likely to be comfortable working with them, there’s less pressure to offer payment, and your cast are more likely to have free time specifically for this project. However, you won’t have the draw of casting known industry voices, and (like I found!) your cast may not have any social media engagement whatsoever!

If you put out a casting call you’re more likely to get a pool of diverse voices, it will likely be people invested (even if not plugged in) to the industry, and you can request that they have their own equipment! However, you then have to work with people you don’t know, a level of professionalism that isn’t usually present on first time projects may be expected, and unpaid casting calls are not wildly well received.

Personally, for your first show, I’d try to use as many friends, or even friends-of-friends as possible. That being said, if you want advice on putting together an audition pack let me know!

Plotting:

It depends on what kind of show you’re aiming to write, but in general plotting a podcast is kind of like plotting a TV show. First of all you should plot out what’s going to happen in a season. Then plot out what’s going to happen in each episode. Ideally each episode will have its own arc, but things don’t always work out like that.

I like to plan things out in a fair amount of detail beforehand (this is especially helpful if you’re writing collaboratively.) Start with what’s going to happen in each episode. Once I know that, I then like to write how it starts and finishes, then the content in bullet points. If you ever can’t think of anything then don’t worry! A lot of things really come together when you’re actually writing.

The most important thing is to not worry at all about the first draft. Just get it down, editing is much easier and more fun once you have something to work with!

There are definitely much more qualified people than me out there giving advice about writing and plotting though; even if it’s directed at prose and script writers it’s still more than applicable!

Sensitivity readers:

If you have the option of sensitivity readers they’re always a great idea! But asking someone to read your work (usually for free) is both time consuming and potentially risky if you don’t know and trust them.

Tumblr, the writeblr community specifically, is a good place to find a sensitivity reader. A lot of people want the practise and are willing to do it for free if you put a call out.

One of the best ways to get feedback on your work is to cast/find people who are appropriate for the roles and then ask for feedback. Obviously they don’t have to, but you’ll find that usually they want to. You can aid in this by giving them some way to give feedback anonymously - maybe a google form - as no matter how chill and friendly you are as the prod team you will always be seen as In Charge.

If you don’t feel right asking someone, especially from a marginalised group, to read and comment on your work for free, you can always just ask general questions in forums or on social media. This isn’t as reliable, as people can lie online, but if you find the right communities and explain you just want to portray characters as accurately as possible there will always be people willing to offer some help. Reddit, for all its flaws, builds great communities, though remember to check the rules to make sure people outside of whatever group they’re aiming to support are allowed to post.

Of course, the first step to writing anything outside of your own experience is a tonne of research. The sensitivity reader should be picking up on small things, not telling you the basics of their experiences. And everyone’s experiences are different, which makes this even tougher! You can get things so spot on for a handful of people whilst inadvertently offending others. Be prepared to be adaptable and take on criticism, but also remember that you don’t have to bend to everyone’s whim; one person saying ‘but this wasn’t my experience!!’ doesn’t mean you’ve done a bad job.

Equipment:

I know you didn’t ask, but this was what I found scariest when I was Brand New.

If you have the money and you’re very serious about this I haven’t encountered a single person who wouldn’t recommend a Blue Yeti mic. However when you’re just starting out, and especially if you’re not planning to have all of your cast together record together/separately but with the same mic, blowing over $100 on a mic is huge, scary, and not always feasible.

I have three small desk mics that I loan out to my cast when needed. They cost ~£30 ($40) from (ew, I know) Amazon. You don’t need a mic for each cast member - you don’t even need a mic for the max number of character speaking in a scene at once. You could probably do it all with one mic, but the time that would take and the affect it would have on scenes may be worth the extra cost! These obviously don’t produce the crisp quality a professional recording mic would, but they have a pop filter and a windscreen and seem to do a good job at reducing background static.

Further noise reduction: Mr Alexander Jalexander Newall, when starting his podcast empire half a decade ago, got it in one: blanket forts.

If you can build a little fabric den for your cast to record in: perfect! If not, tell them just to stick a duvet over their head. This increases the risk of moving duvet sounds, but reduces everything else! And if they shift under the blanket you can always ask them to get comfortable then read the lines again.

And, info courtesy of the McElroys: you can also record in a wardrobe or a room with plenty of bookshelves if you don’t want to build the world’s most bangin’ blanket fort.

The most important advice you will ever receive:

Don’t be scared to ask for help! Join Facebook groups and ask questions! Join discord servers! Message people on Twitter and ask for advice (certain ppl are much more amenable to this than others, but this is pretty clear from their Vibe)! Heck, you can message me on Twitter (or here. Or send another anon. And if I don’t know the answer I’ll ask someone who does!) Everyone just wants to help everyone else, and if they don’t they’re probably not the kind of people you want to associate with. Good luck! And let me know once you socials are up, so I can follow and get excited!

Now, onto 2. Money stuff!

A lot of the info stays the same, but money kind of raises the stakes. Once money’s involved, especially once money and people you don’t know so well are involved, suddenly you have to operate like a business.

Casting:

If you’re planning to pay actors proper wages from the get-go you probably want to put out a casting call. Paid work will attract professionals, and professionals will not only do a great job, but will also help you gain an audience (and have their own equipment!)

You get to decide what the hourly rate is, but usually, depending on where you’re from, there is an average hourly rate voice actors get paid, and if you’re nowhere close to that people will be put off.

You should also make clear what the hourly rate includes: whether it is just recorded audio hours, or includes table reads and directorial time. A lot of people just have every actor record their lines separately, sometimes without direction, then edit them all together. This certainly saves on cost, and makes for a quick turnaround, but it’s no fun, and sometimes makes the show kind of soulless.

Kickstarters:

You can run a kickstarter on an unpaid project, in the hopes of eventually paying the cast and maybe funding future seasons. But I’m going to assume this is advice for ‘I can pay the cast, but what is a kickstarter for?’

Well, that’s up to you! It can be for equipment, for better editing, for podcast music, for podcast art, for a pay rise for the team, for bonus content. Depending on how many stretch goals you have, it can be for all of these things!

In short: backers give money, and get things in return, for example $5 might get you a pin badge, while $100 might get you a signed poster. When the kickstarter reaches a certain goal, maybe $5,000, then the team may then have enough money to produce a holiday special, for example. At $10,000 everyone on the team may get a 10% pay rise.

This is a great way to get people invested in the show, and a great way to make money! But if you want a really great kickstarter you’ll probably want to hire someone with experience in this area.

Contracts:

Money means contracts! Usually two will suffice, they just need edited for each individual team member:

An NDA, to prevent people from discussing the show in any inappropriate situations.

And a literal workplace contract.

You’ll be able to search how to draft these online, but it’s useful to have the help of a lawyer. There are people who do this specifically for podcasts who’ll be able to help you out, but again: you have to pay them!

Equipment:

As I said, actors will probably have their own equipment, but if you want them all recording together: you can rent a studio! They’ll already have all the equipment for you, which is The Dream!

Or you can convert a room into your own studio! Get some soundproof panelling on the walls and invest in a good mixer. I’m afraid I don’t have much advice on this, as I cannot afford anything close to a good mixer! But there are plenty of articles online with helpful information.

I wouldn’t recommend making a paid podcast as your first project, as it’s a lot of pressure, and would almost definitely mean bringing new people onto even the production side of things. There’s always the option to work on another project first, something smaller-scale, to work out any roadblocks you may run into during the paid show. But I’m not telling anyone what to do: if you’re ready, go for it!

Anyway, this was very long and quite rambly, and is probably filled with things you don't actually need to know! But I hope at least some of it was useful! Please feel free to ask any other questions - now or in future, PM or anon - and again: best of luck! I'm so excited for you!

#audio drama #writing advice #writeblr #podcast #anon

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fluffynexu · 5 years ago

Text

Astralignment

and the Korribani Calendar System

Before the arrival of the Exiles the native Sith on Korriban had their own system of keeping track of time. Over the years, this became standardized and refined and is still in use by a large portion of the modern Pureblood community. Since the ancient Sith were observant beings of their world, many of the names and symbols reflected their natural environment. All of these aspects go into what is known as a Sith’s astralignment (astro-alignment).

Since the Empire runs on Imperial Standard Time (IST), anything relating to Korriban or any other Imperial world is referred by the local time of that planet.

Compare a year on Dromund Kaas to Korriban:

Dromund Kaas (everything in standard)

24 hours/day

312 days/year

7,488 hours/year

60 minutes = 1 hour

24 hours = 1 day

5 days = 1 week

7 weeks = 1 month

35 days = 1 month

8 months (+4 weeks and 4 holidays) = 1 year

312 (standard)days = 1 year

Korriban

28 (standard) hours/day

780 (local) days/year

21,840 (standard) hours/year

70 (standard and local) minutes = 1 hour

24 (local) hours = 1 day

10 (local) days = 1 week

6.5 (local) weeks = 1 month

65 (local) days = 1 month

12 (local) months = 1 year

780 (local) days = 1 year

This roughly makes 1 Korribani year approximately 2.9 [Dromund] Kaasi years.

Calendars

The days on Korriban are annotated on some versions of the Imperial calendar alongside the standard days.

In this example, names of the days on the calendar reflect the IST. The black numbers indicate the date in IST, the red numbers represent the date of the Korribani calendar. Placement of the Korribani date indicate when that day begins in relation to the Kaasi one.

A. 00:00 is the same for both. B. 00:00 K starts at 04:00 DK. C. 00:00 K starts at 08:00 DK. D. 00:00 K starts at 12:00 DK. E. 00:00 K starts at 16:00 DK. F. 00:00 K starts at 20:00 DK. G. Loops back around and 00:00 K lines up 00:00 DK .

While seemingly complicated to some, most Sith have grown with this system of overlapping calendars and can easily tell the date by the positioning of the numbers in this format.

There are of course, electronic versions where the date is shown simply:

Since the Korribani month is longer than the Kaasi one, the dates will continue through the Kaasi months. These next two pictures show how long 1 Korribani month is in relation to a Kaasi one.

There is also a version of the Korribani calendar that does not overlap with IST. These are used locally on the planet.

The days of the Korribani week were named after major gods from the most widespread pantheon on the planet:

Ahmuriq, from Ahmurn: the creator god.

Marseriq, from Marserha: mother goddess of the Sith.

Bashariq, from Bashara: goddess of passion.

Teraiq, from Teral: god of protection and justice.

Iskarliq, from Iskarln: god(dess) of conflict and war.

Marduriq, from Mardur: patron god of the Massassi and strength.

Rusaniq, from Rusanel: goddess of knowledge.

Zefiriq, from Zefir: goddess of the hunt.

Shumariq, from Shumari: god of the harvest.

Goruiq, from Gorul: the trickster god(dess).

Months

There are numerous constellations in the Korribani sky. Twelves of these mark the months of the year as well as going into the astalignment. The 12 major, monthly constellations all depict local fauna from ancient fables and have certain characteristics that are commonly associated with them.

1. Yuninchâtsutuyok, the jiminat and agzonûboj engaged in eternal conflict. Dedicated, ambitious, and insightful.

2. Qyalatuyok, the qyalak. Calm, sentimental, and inquisitive.

3. Badzuriqatuyok, the badzuriqash. Tenacious, practical, and direct.

4. Kaarjontuyok, the kaarjontû. Spontaneous, contemplative, and observant.

5. Tukatatuyok, the tukata. Loyal, respectful, and staunch.

6. Hatyatuyok, the hatya. Articulate, perceptive, and adaptable.

7. Lomaituyok, the lomait. Disciplined, fearless, and competitive.

8. Dzushatuyok, the dzushaj. Private, calculating, and flexible.

9. Mowhetuyok, the mowhef. Stern, traditional, and ruthless.

10. Dyaltituyok, the dyaltir. Mischievous, studious, and charismatic.

11. Jhan’dikanatuyok, the lost dikana. Creative, sociable, and resourceful.

12. Niqoituyok, the niqoit. Erudite, cunning, and free-spirited.

Years

The years are also represented by local animals. No one, not even Sith scholars or historians, are sure of the origin of how these animals came to represent the years on Korriban’s calendar. It is one of the many parts of Sith culture that have been lost since it is believed this particular record has been passed down through oral tellings.

The years are kept track of in a 6-year cycle with each year emphasizing a likely success for the ones born in that year.

Chiroik - Wealth

Wokinai - Knowledge

Natûsh - Fame

Dzenal - Influence

Litskoj - Power

Sulemish - Longevity

(ie. Those born in the year of the Sulemish will have a long life.) This again factors into a Sith’s astralignment.

In addition to the years, these 6 animals are also used for the hours on Korriban. But time is not conveyed in the same manner as Basic. While in Basic one would simply say “14:25” (or two twenty-five in the afternoon) the Sith have a much more involved way to convey time.

For example: Shyracks screech and return to their caves as the priestess prepares the altar in the hour of the wokinai.

Translates to: 07:15 local time (or seven fifteen in the morning).

As a side note, a few centuries ago Darth Feras domesticated and bred wrats within the Empire. At first they weren’t seen with much interest by her peers. But popular rumor has it that she pointed out her creations embody the physical traits of the yearly beasts.

Eyes - Chiroik

Ears - Wokinai

Body - Natûsh

Hands - Dzenal

Feet - Litskoj

Tail - Sulemish

Afterwards they quickly became a favored pet and companion among the Sith, being seen as an auspicious animal.

While not related to their calendar there is a tradition of being assigned a birth flower. For this, the Sith do not look to their skies but rather, when a child is born the placenta is buried in a pot with 12 seeds. The first of these seeds to sprout becomes that Sith’s birth flower. These 12 flowers are also used in medicine, therapeutic or preventive, for some common ailments.

Serla for headaches.

Roshal for good eyesight.

Nashkir for sore throats.

Atsudqâ for heart health.

Hyaranjat for good digestion.

Mûyoin for muscle pain.

Shasâyar for fertility.

Jûzon for blood circulation.

Ashanin for bone mending.

Qoyo for fevers.

Chisiqsanu for irritated ridge skin.

Kûsk’inti for fatigue and replenishing energy.

The last two parts that go into a Sith’s astalignment are their energies. The weekly energies correspond with 4 classic “elements” of earth, fire, air, and water. While the daily energy simply refers to day or night (d/n) in regards to when the person was born.

Combined with all aspects mentioned in this document, year, month, weekly energy, day (+energy), and flower, one can study a Sith’s astalignment. ex. Darth Vowrawn’s astalignment factors:

The study of these astralignments is a complicated field on to its own while the findings can be very important to some among the Sith. There are specialized scholars who offer their services to the old families so that the “perfect matches” (marriage, business, or otherwise) can be set up.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

aaaaahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT’S DONE. i feel like frodo at mt. doom after the ring is destroyed omg... ;-;

SOOOO. i wanted, and i mean REALLY wanted, to finish this for lunar new year (for pretty obvious reasons lol)...... :,) welp. then i was like “i can do may 4″ lol NOPE. but here we are! still technically sith day? whatever. imma say I Did It. :D

also pls don’t laugh at my stupid drawings. i already know i can’t art. ok??? >,<

special thanks to @snootysith for giving me a bunch of sithy names and words for me to use. c: like y’all... coming up with fake words, that look and sound ok is really HARD (for my dumbass anyway)

other worldbuilding posts that are... sorta mentioned/used in this:

@inquisitorhotpants‘s dk calendar

BOOS! x3

and some other stuff ....

but uh, yea. if you’re wondering “hang on there fluffy... did you really make a big, dumbass zodiac/astrology post??” the answer is...

yes.

yes i did... xU

but also i imagine the ancient sith had a lot of special and important dates for you know... religious things? *shrug* and over the many, many years all of this was passed down and prob altered in some way to fit into modern sith society? idk...

now imma say some things here bc i know For A Fact!!! that ppl don’t go onto original posts to read op tags on this hellsite lol.

and this isn’t me trying to sound like an arrogant asshole... but these are for some common questions that’ll undoubtedly come up:

yes, you can use this in any extent or manner.

no, you obvs don’t have to. ignore it if you want. i’ll be ok lol.

no, i’m not gonna write a long ass book with all the little details on every aspect of all the traits and then assign these things for your character(s). just make something up. that’s what i did here xD (plus my brain is d e a d from this)

yes, this is seen as a mostly(!) tomato pureblood sith thing but obvs attitudes are different between individuals. some are super into it, some could careless and think it’s all fake news, some have parents that care too much about it which is annoying and interfering with their life so they lowkey hate it lol.

no, i couldn’t do a read more bc it wouldn’t look as nice and i worked hard ok? ;-; i apologize for clogged dashes in advance.

i think that’s it? ofc feel free to hmu if you’re ok with a reply that can take anywhere from a few min to 3 business days ^-^;

#swtor #sith pureblood #sith warrior #sith inquisitor #y'all know how surprisingly hard it is to make constellations???#like...#DX #they have to look like the thing and i had to know what that Thing was #but also! have you seen rl constellations??#they don't look like The Thing at all!#so i had to make it kinda abstract? idfk #now if you'll excuse me #i'm off to be a completely unproductive member of the fandom again #:')#worldbuilding #long post

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majicmarker · 4 years ago

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so i’ve had a lot on my mind lately — the good, the bad, the ugly, you know the drill. i’m used to the bad and the ugly, but i think (and ofc by my therapist’s rec) i need to give a little credit to the good, too. not to mention the good is largely comprised of people, and those people deserve a sports stadium wave, yk? idk shit abt sports, whatever, but i know what the wave is and it’s like the grandest gesture i can think of, SO

listen, y’all. to get real here, i hate fandom. my time spent therein has been hit-or-miss, but the misses got me hard and contributed to some major self-loathing, etc etc. we’re not gonna get into the specifics, i don’t owe that to anyone, but suffice it to say things got Rough.

but so much of it can be so, so good. and rn i want to keep on my rose-colored glasses, and the rosiest parts for me have always been @kitten1618x and @mygutsforgarters

(quite a few others, too, but i no longer have everyone’s info. and some ppl are newer friends, or relationships that have moved more slowly. i have mad love for u guys too, obvs, but ik melissa and gus irl so we know each other More and they’re who this post is rly about atm. pls know i don’t want to harsh on anyone’s feelings)

the tl;dr version of events is i met them both via fanfic. i happened upon theirs like “bitch!!!! **i** wanna do this, they’re bomb as hell” and then i made them be friends w me. they’ll tell you they wanted to be friends w me first, but that’s not important bc **i** am the one making this post, so they can both like,, suck it.

ANYWAY.

@ melissa : so bitch listen. here’s the thing abt melissa…… i found her while browsing jonsa fic back when i cared abt GOT, and she brought me back to what i loved so much abt romance when i first started, way back in junior high, what’s up. i bad a fascination w historial romantic epics for a loooooong time — those formative yrs, amirite ladies??? — but girl i could never write it so well as melissa. immediately she struck this balance between the drama you expect from historicals and the levity of a good romance, and i was just like, “hand to god this woman must be published already, surely???”

(she’s not, but that’s ridiculous so we’re gonna skip that)

(also she’s busy?? we’ve been friends for like six years and i will never know how many kids she actually has, but the point is she’s a goddamn superhero and i’m obsessed w her, MOVING ON)

i just Had to be her friend for two reasons: 1) she’s too talented, and b) i have said that abt 2 ppl my entire life and she was the first, so i was like, “AH YES MY HOLY GRAIL”

so ofc i slid into her DMs just as effectively as that one guy i had a crush on when i was sixteen and he’s still shooting me texts every valentine’s day bc of the societal pressures i guess (it is Far Less Effective these days, he’s my age and therefore too young for me, gross, but i digress), except me and melissa go way stronger.

she reminded me of why, half a lifetime ago, i started writing romance — bc it’s fun, bc i want to. bc i can do absolutely anything i want, bc who else is gonna read it but me and whoever i share it with? it was all up to me what i wanted to do with it, and i could do anything. nothing really mattered but what i wanted, and i hadn’t felt that way abt anything in such a long time — let alone abt something i used to love so much.

melissa’s writing is so beautiful, it’s everything i wanted to achieve when i was fifteen and never got around to perfecting. and i’m totally okay w that now, bc what do i need to do myself that she’s not already doing/wants to do in the future? when i found melissa’s writing i found a missing part of me — a part i’d maybe lost, maybe i gave it up, idk, but it was totally gone until i found her fics and they fucking clicked. i had to reach out bc there was a part of me that was a part of her, and she helped me find that again w/o even knowing it.

so i found melissa via GOT, and from the start she’d been trying to get me to write some bethyl. years and years, she dropped not-so-subtle hints — and by “hints,” i mean legit directives that i watch just enough TWD to write her some beth/daryl fic. real crafty, she is.

eventually the stars aligned: i was bored w the same dynamics i’d been writing for years, i wanted smthn new, i was restless, i was line editing a bethyl fic she’d written, and — again — this shit clicked. her fic made me want to explore this dynamic i’d never done before, so i watched the prerequisite episodes (no more than that tho, i super hate the show and i’m begging y’all to not @ me abt it anymore). i found smthn that i’d been missing, smthn that challenged and excited me and brought me back around to why i love romance and, more importantly, why i want to write it myself.

so as i was starting to write bethyl, i was poking around the ao3 tag to get a feel for what had been done, what hadn’t, anything i might be missing. and goddamn BAM —

@ gus : this is where u enter dramatically thru a red velvet curtain that i don’t wanna touch (Metaphorically bc you do romance better than me and i’m cool w that bc your talent simply Cannot be touched, and Literally bc i hate velvet) — i was like, “please for the love of god let her want to write contemporary romance, i need some good fckin food”

i happened upon “doo wah diddy diddy” first. ofc the summary hooked me, forget my usual hard no against pregnancy fics (i have issues w pregnancy and that’s all anybody Needs to know, back off), but This Bitch !!!!!!! has a way with words and i wanted to be friends w her straightaway. lmao too bad for her, now she’s stuck w me

gus’s fics gave me what i wanted without having to write it myself. her style is so distinctive, she hits the notes between porn and Actual Affection that is missing from uhhhh, every romance i’ve tried?? (why is everyone so intent on the sex part?? fckin chill. at best it’s unrelatable and at worst u sound like u’d rather wear someone than fuck them, check urself)

she writes w such care, she wants you to know what she’s doing here, and what she’s doing here is combining the physical and emotional needs of both characters w/o infringing on anyone’s comfortability. you root for these characters bc they simply want to be together, no strings (and if there are strings, damn, they talk abt it).

gus makes you believe in love in the modern age. like, not to sound like one of those ppl who post fckin “no one in this generation knows how to love!!!1!!11!!” memes on facebook, those are dumb, but gus’s writing made me think “yeah man, love ain’t dead, it’s just abt how we approach it.”

(if y’all haven’t guessed yet, i have some hang-ups abt relationships. i’ve goddamn earned those. but melissa and gus both brought me back to where i needed to be — in this place where, yeah, we’ve got some shit to deal with, but we all still deserve the things we want, and those things are achievable. i could not have gotten here without them, so jot that down.)

gus is Real, she’s funny, she’s unapologetic in the way she writes. ofc she has her personal hurdles, but who doesn’t?? and tbh nobody writes a sex scene like gus does. physical, realistic, but balanced w the emotional depth that makes you root for these characters bc you can Feel how much they want each other — not just sexually, but in the less-erotic aftermath of that passion. it continues to blow my mind, bc i’ve never seen anyone do what she does. i can’t even pinpoint the specifics, bc she just… Does It. and you’re reading it like “yeah bitch that’s it,” and That’s It.

it’s fckin wild.

these two — my best friends, the lights of my life, both of whom always make me crave chicken tenders at THE most inconvenient hours bc somehow we always talk abt chicken or ice cream or ultimately DQ, but they're both so hot idec — have something special.

i really, really want them both to know that: it’s not just in how they’ve treated me as a friend, but who they are as people, in their creative pursuits. i’ve never known support the way they’ve shown me; i’ve never known this much enthusiasm or investment or belief that i can do what i want with my talent. i want them to know that i feel the same way abt them and their works.

sometimes, when i look back at their writing that completely kicked my ass, i still can’t believe that they’ve become two of my best friends. it’s totally bonkers. they’re This Talented, and they wanna be friends w my spastic ass? GIRL. i’m out.

i’m not always the best at being present, at giving people what they need when they need it. but with everything that melissa and gus have given me in the past few years, i need them to know this — honey!!! i need all y’all to know this, bc i know fandom shit is hard, but you should know some of these friendships are so, so worth all that bullshit, so —

they have so much to give, so much to say, so much to offer. i could not have kept going without them. i couldn’t believe in myself without the faith they’ve given to me. i hope that i can always give that same faith right back.

and that, babes, is what real soulmates are all about.

#i just love them whoops my hand slipped #the majnificent adventures #gus tag #@ melissa wtf is our tag we had like five #how do i not remember five things #anyway i got into my feelings tnt don’t @ me

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jkflesh · 4 years ago

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Interview with jesu January 2021 New Noise magazine #56

Read the interview by Antoine "Neredude" Duprez below:

The “Terminus” Bandcamp page states that the album was done between 2016 and 2020. That's a long period in your standards! Did you get some sort of writer's block with Jesu? Or was it because you were so busy with your numerous projects?

— I never get writers block, I just simply move on to the next thing if I’m not currently inspired to work on a specific project. Most my records, for many years, have been written and recorded over extended periods of time; I work when inspiration strikes, when it doesn’t I move onto the next thing; there’s never a block for me with creation generally, maybe just specific areas. i take large breaks for my music so as to afford some sort of distance, gone are the times when an album would be hammered out in a month!

''When I Was Small'' has kind of a Radiohead thing in the vocals, whereas ''Alone'' reminds me a lot of Sigur Rós. Are those bands part of your background?

— Ok, interesting observation, but no Radiohead is not an influence on this song, the biggest influences on the vocals were Liam Gallagher from Oasis, and subconsciously "White Flag" by Godflesh (which I only discovered after the album was complete). I do love some Radiohead though, as I do Sigur Rós, but neither band is a direct or conscious influence. Musically “When I was Small” was mostly influenced by trying to recreate a vibe of early Neil Young mixed with Oasis, in a jesu fashion, coupled with a demo production; intentionally underproduced. I’m not sure where a lot of the influence on “Alone” came from, electronic pop music for sure, short and sweet was the intention, driven entirely by the voice sample.

Regarding “Terminus,” did you set yourself a framework or musical approach beforehand like you did for “Every Day I Get Closer to the Light From Which I Came?“

— Not really no, generally when I work on a bunch of songs things will fall into place naturally, the songs become a whole and then collectively the songs will become conceptual as i write, they build their own logic, so to speak, I don’t force anything, I let things happen organically as I write and record.

I think around 2013, you said “Every Day I Get Closer to the Light From Which I Came” was going to set a precedent for the next album. Now that it's out, do you still think so? Personally, even though both records are different, I can definitely hear a connection.

— Yeah, shame it took 7 years to come to fruition! And many things changed over those 7 years, as ever. Jesu certainly documents my personal journey in life, it’s ultra personal, Godflesh is much more external comparatively. A lot to the solo jesu work took a backseat when I worked on the collaborations with Sun Kil Moon, but that was very refreshing and inspired me to take jesu further, I had notions of discontinuing the project at some point, but the collabs with Sun Kil Moon inspired me to keep pursuing jesu.

"Every Day I Get Closer to the Light From Which I Came” was inspired in great part by you becoming a father. Can you tell us a bit about what was on your mind when you wrote “Terminus?”

— That’s very true, especially the initial journey of bringing life into the/our world. everything is there in the lyrics and artwork for "Terminus" so of course, like a lot of my work, depends on the listeners perspectives, they can make it their own, make it personal. But it’s essentially about endings, and my obsession with finality, my sensitivity to it and my fear of it. There’s a line in the title song that says “my end, our end, the end, the end”, which pretty much sums it up.

The EP “Never” you released before “Terminus” is quite different and more focused on electronics. I remember you telling me that you liked going experimental on EPs, doing stuff you wouldn't do on a full length. So I figure that's still the case?

— Yeah, I like experimenting with everything, I like satisfying myself with different ideas, obviously that doesn’t suit my listeners too much, but I make this music for myself, and I’m always trying to do better. I still don’t know why I put myself through the trial and hell of releasing music, I often think about just recording for myself and not bothering with an audience, but I’m not really capable of earning money in other ways, so I have to finish music and release it, let it go. For me "Never" was just another way of interpreting the jesu mood, nothing deviates too much from the original intention of the project. It’s weird, critically, it was perceived as this big electronic departure, whereas jesu has sounded pretty much like this most of it’s lifetime! “Pale Sketches", "Lifeline" even "Silver” is all mostly electronic, save a real drum loop in the song "Silver", but this EP seemed to get this thing that its all electronic, whereas it;’s no more electronically oriented than any other jesu record I have made. jesu is a mood that can be explored and experimented with, I’m not making the first album over and over, some can’t get over that, but that was a different moment in my life which I captured, and as an artist who challenges oneself besides the audience you can never win, and one will generally never win hah. This is a new jesu, it comes with age, transitions. "Never" was intentionally idiosyncratic and deliberately fvcked up sounding, and I think by and large critically the subtleties were lost on people.

“Never” features two version of ''Never There for You'', one of them described as the ''original vision''. Can you explained how you ended up releasing two version of this song?

— The “original vision” existed like that since around 2010, I shelved it, it was to be a Pale Sketcher song, I had an album’s worth of similar songs, I still do, couldn’t decide if they should be jesu or Pale Sketcher. I sent them to Aphex Twin / Richard James because he was a huge fan of the Pale Sketcher EP “Seventh Heaven”, we were talking about a release on his label Rephlex, I had all these songs that were floating between jesu and Pale Sketcher. But then he folded Rephlex for good, a real shame, so I was left with all these songs in limbo, I still am, but at that period I shelved them all. I returned to them around 2018 and started adding guitars and vocals, thinking that they will now definitely be jesu songs. “Never There for You” was one of them, so I wanted the listener to hear what it was originally before I added more of organic me. I’m working on finalising all those songs for Rephlex into future jesu, probably an album that I hope to release late 2021, it’s not a "Terminus" though, and probably most ppl will hate it hah.

“Terminus” is the first album to feature Ted Parsons in a long while. Did you invite him because you felt these songs needed his touch?

— I wanted some live drums, 3 songs only. I was going to play them myself, like on "Opiate Sun". "Infinity" etc, but I really wanted Ted involved and see how he interpreted my drum parts, he always swings something and makes it interesting. he’s a very real drummer, and a very real human being.

When touring is possible again, would you like to tour with Jesu, with Ted on drums?

— I may tour solo, with electronics and projections. The band thing is tiresome and always just sounds like a band, bands bore me these days because of the constraints of the instruments, rock records also bore me these days; same productions, etc, very little actual aesthetic, but its popular and what do I know. But I’d rather jesu now sound hugely expansive live, not just like a rock band. But i’m still unsure. Live drums swallow my voice live, I can’t sing above them, and jesu is a tiny project, can’t play big venues with stage separation and screens around the drums, and 8 guys diving around onstage, it’s not affordable. I stopped performing as jesu for some time due to all those reasons.

You said “Silver” is probably your favourite Jesu record. Are there other Jesu albums that stand out in your mind?

— Did I say that?! Haha. I don’t recall, and that opinion changes every day I feel. I like how concise and all encompassing "Silver" is; it covers most of the ground that I feel the project should cover. But "Terminus" is my favourite jesu album, and it should be, otherwise I would not feel I was moving forward, and I feel I am, it is the best jesu album I have made.

Last year, you told Olivier ''Zoltar'' Badin that the next Zonal album would probably go in the direction of it's title track ''Wrecked''. Is it still true to this day and what can you tell us about that upcoming album?

— Well, a lot of time has passed since, but I think Kevin and I are still quite struck on that song as a template for future recordings, although everything changes all the time, of course, and time is passing fast once again, we haven’t discussed Zonal in some time.

I know you don't actually consider yourself as a guitarist. With you focusing on your electronic projects like JK Flesh and Zonal lately, do you ever get tired of guitar? I'm asking this because I recently discussed the subject with Steven Wilson. He basically told me that after 30 years writing and doing gigs with guitar, he's feeling more creative and excited when writing music on other instruments and I wondered if you ever felt something similar.

— All instruments are just a means to an end for me; a tool for the bigger job, I don’t really wish to be overly proficient at any instrument, I liked that about punk, and it’s what I’m not that fond of about overly progressive music, it’s like it’s for show, I don’t do anything for show, I’d rather be shit than great, it’s more interesting, it reflects the human condition, imperfection. I don’t wish for things to sound perfect, whatever that is, people should not come to my music for that, they probably don’t and it’s probably why my audience is so small haha.

I recently discovered that you worked with Josh Eustis with the mastering of the JK Flesh / Orphx live album and was a bit surprised. How did that happen?

— Josh is a very good friend of Dominick Fernow’s (Prurient / Vatican Shadow / Hospital Productions, etc), and Dominick is a very close friend of mine. I was aware that Josh does very good mastering besides being an extremely talented artist, so Dominick suggested josh master that collaboration, and it sounds excellent!

I interviewed Lee Dorrian some time ago and we were talking about the impact Napalm Death had, not just the band itself but all the bands who were formed after playing in that band: Godflesh, Carcass, Cathedral, Scorn... Lee thought this legacy had a lot to do with John Peel broadcasting a wide array of music on young aspiring musicians. How would you explain such creativity and versatility from musicians who all played in Napalm Death at one point?

—�� Lee is absolutely correct, a lot of very young kids listened to John Peel, most generations did, his taste exposed music to many of us who were already enquiring at a young age that we would not have heard anywhere else and of course back then this centralised things, not fragmented them like the internet does; a kid now can absorb an artist entire catalog in an hour, speed listen to it all, then have an opinion, but it’s informed, no context, no history, no experience. We heard music then on Peel and then hunted it down. It took work, valuable work that paid dividends. Peel’s broad appreciation of eternally subversive music and otherwise told us that music didnt need to exist in such strict compartments, that’s it’s all part of a greater whole, so when groups of musicians collaborated even at such young ages, our tastes were informed and wide, very rarely singular.

Can you tell us a bit about you latest remixing output? What were the tracks that you enjoyed the most remixing? Those are the names I could find: Full of Hell, Oathbreaker and a lot of projects I've never heard of.

— I always and love to remix, I love the fact that I didn’t create this music but can make something new from someone else’s work. Music is endless, for me, it’s just when you wish to end it, but ultimately it can never end. I have some remixes that I love moire than others, but only over time, I never let a remix go unless I am as happy as can be with it. Sometimes I would’ve loved to have done more, my Killing Joke remix is a good example of that, I wanted to go further, but Youth of Killing Joke told me they were happy with where I was at, I think I could’ve made it much better. The Oathbreaker remix you mentioned is a favourite of mine from the last years worth of my remixes. I’ll remix anyone, if they can afford my fee and I have the time!

I'm curious, since you released some of your music with your own label with Godflesh, Jesu and other projects, did it have an impact on the revenue you got from streaming platforms like Spotify, compared to albums released on Earache or Hydra Head? I'm asking this in the light of the neverending controversy regarding streaming revenue for musicians.

— On my own label more money can be earned from these services due to no split with another label, which usually would be 50/50, but streaming is very small as is common knowledge. I never see any royalties from Earache so can’t compare their rates etc since Godflesh is constantly recouping an advance from Columbia / Sony for the "Selfless" album that Earache, contractually, can recoup from, even though they didn’t give the advance, so they’re making money from the band and from an advance they never paid, which these days you would think that besides being unethical that it would be criminal, but such were the contracts in the 80’s / 90’s. So I’ve never seen a single penny from streaming with Earache!

I know it might be pointless to ask you, since someone's mind can change with time but do you still think “Post Self” may be your last album with Godflesh? Your told us last year that you weren't sure if you had enough in you creatively to do another album and also that the constant screaming was a bit harder to do.

— Hah, the shouting/screaming live now takes its toll, it does with age, I’m unsure due to not performing for so long thanks to the pandemic how my voice would be for Godflesh now in a live setting, I’d have very little problem in the studio. I’m still struck on the fact that there may not be another full length studio album from Godflesh, I haven’t been inspired to initiate one for numerous reasons, and I don’t wish for us to repeat ourselves in any way, I do have a lot of interesting old material though, some good rare stuff, demos, “Us and Them in Dub” which is also in the works, but I work on that sporadically, when I feel inspired to do so. So there’s a lot of good stuff coming.

Last time I interviewed you in 2014, Aphex Twin was making his grand return with “Syro”. I remember you telling me that the album was still shrinkwrapped on your desk. Knowing you're a big Aphex fan, I wanted to know if you liked that album, especially knowing that a lot of fans were disappointed by it.

— Ahh it was such a long time ago now that we spoke last! I love "Syro”, but I love Aphex, and since I first heard "Didgeridoo" when it was released and then "Quoth", he will always be a favourite, "Syro" may not be an Aphex favourite for me, but it’s still amazing, he is amazing; creative, subversive and doesn’t give a fvck ultimately, he’d also never release anything if he didnt really have to, he does this for himself, for me the best art is entirely selfish and should consider no one. People are always disappointed, a lot of people just can’t live with the fact that an artist strays from their own personal conception of what an artist should be, it’s some sort of misguided entitlement, I lost that when II was around 14, a lot of people don’t lose it and now these people have the internet. No artist owes me anything, if they gave me one thing in my life then i will always respect their art, regardless of whether it works for me or not, and if I don’t like it much, I won’t be peddling that opinion on the internet in an entitled egotistical manner, I’m glad I did not know that a lot of people were disappointed, haha.

Thank you very much! Best JKB, Jan 2021

#jesu #justin broadrick #interview

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randomoranges · 3 years ago

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sometimes my life is an actual sitcom. i wish i could say i made this stuff up, but now, i legit met a guy while selling a shoe rack who came back to chat me up post sale bcs he thought i was pretty. he then proceeded to tell me a million times in one hr and has since been very over the top about being into me. as much as it’s nice to have attention u also gotta pace yourself. hes so over the top it’s ridiculous and also getting more annoying.

also never fucking send ppl semi nude photos unprompted wtf is wrong with yall.

anyways i live vicariously through teacher au and use real life shit to put the characters through the same thing. today i vibed with edward.

this takes place before he and étienne are together

this is a blurb. i just needed to get a thought out of my system

edwards answers are legit what i wrote

the gag of all of edwards exes having names that start with c continues XD

Unsolicited

Edward knows he technically shouldn’t, but he’s bored at work and for once, the kids are actually quietly doing their own thing. He decides against his better judgement to open Facebook and scroll aimlessly for a moment or two, while time goes on. It’ll give him a chance to see what exciting lives the rest of his friends are living and envy those who aren’t stuck at work.

He quickly notices a red little number up on the top right corner to signal that he has one unopened conversation and for a moment, he wonders which of his friends would have messaged him. There hadn’t really been any ongoing chats at the moment, so he’s pleasantly surprised and looking forward to hearing from his friends.

He’s only a little disappointed when he sees that it’s not from any of his friends, but instead from a guy he’d met just last Friday in the most strangest of ways. (His friend had hosted a garage sale and had asked for help. Edward had gone. He’d brought along some of his own stuff. This one man – Charles – had bought his old wooden shoe rack. Charles had chatted Edward up. They’d exchanged contact information and had more or less chatted since then. It was a strange way to meet someone – but, not the strangest.)

Charles is – cute and they had a pleasant chat. Edward certainly hadn’t minded the attention, even if it had come from out of nowhere. He’d been looking forward to meeting up with him again, but as the days had gone on and their conversations had progressed, he’d found himself slowly losing a bit of interest over Charles’ over-eagerness.

There were just so many times Charles could say he thought Edward was attractive in an hour before it got redundant and annoying.

Edward was flattered Charles was interested in him, but Edward didn’t want to rush this either. He’d just gotten out of a serious relationship and with the end of the school year looming close, he had other things to deal with. Once summer break arrived, he would have more time and more energy. In the meantime, however, he didn’t need this stranger he barely knew to wax poetics and tell him he wished to wake up beside him to see how he woke up – or whatever garbage he’d been told. Edward was willing to give this a go, but he wasn’t looking to settle down and get married with Charles after knowing him for three days and it quite honestly felt as though Charles had already booked their venue at times.

He was – over the top and intense. Edward had appreciated the fact that Charles had told him he’d found him attractive when he’d first seen him and he liked that he had actually returned to chat him up. It had been a little weird when Charles had called him his beloved and stranger still when he’d apologised from taking up his time and keeping him away from his friends when they’d talked that first time, but Edward had let it slide and had almost found it charming – in its own bizarre way.

Now, it feels as though Charles is trying too hard, when really he doesn’t have to. Edward thought he was attractive, had even told him so and was more than willing to see where this would lead. but if However, if Charles doesn’t slow down, Edward will back out and move on. (Which reminds him – there’d been that whole other conversation where Charles had told him that he looked forward to living their lives together and that he didn’t want to lose him. To which Edward had politely told him that it would be best to get to know each other first.)

Edward wants some fun – not some intense long-term lovey-dovey besotted nonsense. At least – not after three days of talking with the man.

Still, he opens the conversation, curiosity, and boredom getting the best of him, and at first, it’s nice, until Charles asks him if he could have a photo. Edward lets out a long-suffering sigh and is glad his students are too busy with their work to notice.

Charles has asked to send him a photo right now, of all things.

Edward is so not in the mood for any of this.

“No. I’m in class teaching. My students are taking a test.” He writes out. He doesn’t care if he comes across as annoyed, but this man is being irksome in his own infatuated way and it’s – pathetic. He likes the attention, to a degree, he enjoys feeling wanted, but Charles needs to calm down his ardours.

He leaves it at that and doesn’t bother with Charles for the rest of the day.

By the time Edward’s done, he heads to his car and figures he’ll check again to see if he’s gotten a new message. There is still part of him that is curious about this whole ordeal and so he’s a little bit pleased when he sees that Charles has sent him a few messages after their last chat.

He’s less enthused when he gets to the last one.

The first was in regards to the whole photo debacle, saying maybe next time. The second mentioned that he was going for a jog. And the last message – the kicker really, was a photo Charles had sent of himself, shirtless and thankfully from the waist up.

And to think Edward had nearly sent him a post-work exhausted face selfie for the fun of it.

He grumbles, puts his phone away, and figures he’ll deal with it when he gets home.

It’s not that he necessarily minded the photo – he did find the guy attractive to a point, but – it had been unprompted. Unsolicited. He hadn’t asked for a photo. He hadn’t been expecting a shirtless photo. He wasn’t in the current mood to receive such a photo. He could have been at school on break and gotten this photo.

He’s angry and annoyed by the time he gets home.

Edward putters around and leaves Charles on read. It’s one thing going after sex and expecting these photos and it’s another to get them out of the blues. He lets his friends know of this debacle and relishes in their reactions. He’s glad someone gets it.

Finally, after making dinner, playing a few rounds of video games, taking a shower, getting his lunch ready for the following day, and having a nice chat with his friends, he decides to answer Charles.

“Even if a photo of a woman, man, or person shirtless may be nice to receive, it’s always better to send it with consent and with fair warning. Especially when you’re not expecting one and that with my work, there are often children nearby.”

He doesn’t expect an answer so quickly, especially since it’s been five hours since the photo was sent, but Charles, true to form, answers. Edward laughs out loud when he reads how very sorry Charles is and how he genuinely thought Edward would appreciate it. Edward sighs again and groans, passing a hand through his hair.

He tries to find a polite way of trying to get this man to understand and he’s only a little surprised by how easily the words come to him, “There’s a time and place for everything. You don’t send these types of photos willy-nilly whenever you feel like it. There’s context, time, mood, etc. Consent and fair-warning. Imagine you were sitting with your family, friends, or kids and you received such a photo without warning. You can’t assume that the person on the other side is in an appropriate setting to receive these types of messages and images without checking beforehand.”

It’s at times like these he wishes men could be less – like this. He likes a good shirtless photo just like anyone else who’s into men, but he hates that this seems to be a norm. And at least this was only a shirtless photo! He doesn’t want to think of the number of times when he was having a nice conversation about literally anything unrelated to the human body, only to find himself with a photo of a man’s junk, completely unprompted.

Sometimes, he almost wishes he were into women just to be spared this.

Edward figures he’s given Charles enough etiquette lessons for the night and puts his phone away. He pulls up something decent to watch on television and does his best to forget about the incident for now. If anything, he reminds himself, he doesn’t need to commit to anything with this besotted Romeo.

FIN

#teacher au #pc: edmonton #edward murphy #au #fic

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