#but it has been a long week
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Scheduling meetings on a Friday should be illegal, lovelies.
#navybrat rambles#work work work#meetings#on a friday#why?#i'm over it#bahaha#it could be worse#but it has been a long week#it should be illegal#i'm le tired#are you reading my tags?#go drink some water#stay hydrated my friends
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I was meeting a client at a famous museum’s lounge for lunch (fancy, I know) and had an hour to kill afterwards so I joined the first random docent tour I could find. The woman who took us around was a great-grandmother from the Bronx “back when that was nothing to brag about” and she was doing a talk on alternative mediums within art.
What I thought that meant: telling us about unique sculpture materials and paint mixtures.
What that actually meant: an 84yo woman gingerly holding a beautifully beaded and embroidered dress (apparently from Ukraine and at least 200 years old) and, with tears in her eyes, showing how each individual thread was spun by hand and weaved into place on a cottage floor loom, with bright blue silk embroidery thread and hand-blown beads intricately piercing the work of other labor for days upon days, as the labor of a dozen talented people came together to make something so beautiful for a village girl’s wedding day.
What it also meant: in 1948, a young girl lived in a cramped tenement-like third floor apartment in Manhattan, with a father who had just joined them after not having been allowed to escape through Poland with his pregnant wife nine years earlier. She sits in her father’s lap and watches with wide, quiet eyes as her mother’s deft hands fly across fabric with bright blue silk thread (echoing hands from over a century years earlier). Thread that her mother had salvaged from white embroidery scraps at the tailor’s shop where she worked and spent the last few days carefully dying in the kitchen sink and drying on the roof.
The dress is in the traditional Hungarian fashion and is folded across her mother’s lap: her mother doesn’t had a pattern, but she doesn’t need one to make her daughter’s dress for the fifth grade dance. The dress would end up differing significantly from the pure white, petticoated first communion dresses worn by her daughter’s majority-Catholic classmates, but the young girl would love it all the more for its uniqueness and bright blue thread.
And now, that same young girl (and maybe also the villager from 19th century Ukraine) stands in front of us, trying not to clutch the old fabric too hard as her voice shakes with the emotion of all the love and humanity that is poured into the labor of art. The village girl and the girl in the Bronx were very different people: different centuries, different religions, different ages, and different continents. But the love in the stitches and beads on their dresses was the same. And she tells us that when we look at the labor of art, we don’t just see the work to create that piece - we see the labor of our own creations and the creations of others for us, and the value in something so seemingly frivolous.
But, maybe more importantly, she says that we only admire this piece in a museum because it happened to survive the love of the wearer and those who owned it afterwards, but there have been quite literally billions of small, quiet works of art in billions of small, quiet homes all over the world, for millennia. That your grandmother’s quilt is used as a picnic blanket just as Van Gogh’s works hung in his poor friends’ hallways. That your father’s hand-painted model plane sets are displayed in your parents’ livingroom as Grecian vases are displayed in museums. That your older sister’s engineering drawings in a steady, fine-lined hand are akin to Da Vinci’s scribbles of flying machines.
I don’t think there’s any dramatic conclusions to be drawn from these thoughts - they’ve been echoed by thousands of other people across the centuries. However, if you ever feel bad for spending all of your time sewing, knitting, drawing, building lego sets, or whatever else - especially if you feel like you have to somehow monetize or show off your work online to justify your labor - please know that there’s an 84yo museum docent in the Bronx who would cry simply at the thought of you spending so much effort to quietly create something that’s beautiful to you.
#shut up e#long post#Saturday thoughts#this has been in my drafts for a week haha#also this is the heart of why AI art feels so wrong#forget the discussion of copyright and theft etc - even if models were only trained on public domain they would still feel very wrong#because they’re not art. art is the labor of creation#even commercial art and art commissioned by the popes and kings of history: there is humanity in the labor of it#unrelated: I did not know living in the Bronx was now something to brag about. How the fuck do y’all New Yorkers afford this city???
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Ok I’m being so brave about it but a couple of days ago I saw this post claiming that the Jedi saying ‘this weapon [your lightsaber] is your life’ is emblematic of ‘the Jedi’s failure as peacekeepers’ (not an exact quote but pretty close) because why would a weapon be the life of a peacekeeper?
And like. The Jedi are a culture. They’re a religion.
You know that, right? You know that many cultures, including generally peaceful ones, have sacred weapons, right? You know that the bond between a Jedi and their crystal(s) is an extremely sacred thing that requires the consent of both parties and is integral to their way of life, right?
You know that lightsabers are not intended to be only for killing, right? That the first thing Luke learns to do with his lightsaber is to shield and defend? You know that a culture having sacred weapons doesn’t mean that they view killing as sacred, right?
Not trying to start shit, I don’t even remember who said it, but ugh
#the damage the Acolyte (‘i know a Jedi wouldn’t draw their lightsaber unless they’re willing to kill’) has done to Star Wars is incalculable#hey guys long time no post#I am sorry about that September’s been… really shit#hope to get back into my rewatch and stuff next week?#is this the original post tag#Jedi order#star wars#lightsabers
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Same eye color
#homestuck#davekat#dave strider#karkat vantas#i couldnt resist a lil post 4 davekat week and this has been collecting dust in my files for long enuf!!!
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I love the difference between Pen and Colin. She’s loved him for years, silently but unwavering. While he’s just come to the realisation that somewhere along the line he’s fallen completely head over heels for her and he is UNHINGED about it. All I’m saying is Colin wouldn’t last a minute in the asylum where they raised her.
#the poor boy probably had to wait a few days/weeks and he’s been driven insane with need and want#while we have Penelope the face of composure who’s loved him for as long as she can remember to the point where it has become white noise#it’s just something that’s there#i find it deeply entertaining#polin#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington
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the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.
three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.
two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.
their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.
one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.
i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.
i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.
and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?
you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.
a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.
someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.
#writeblr#warm up#this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru#but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist#ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work#part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r#ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week#this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism#imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY#''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''
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ive been putting this off for a bit ,, eerhehrhere im gonna crumble
#WHOOOOF its been a busy week for me#but we’re so back trust#the color choice in this is questionable but thats ok#i think ive just been staring at it for too long#i have many words to say but i cant really remember#stuff has been pretty wacky lately#tmnt#tmnt fanart#tmnt 2012#2012 tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#fanart#vphews
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Renegade Nell (2024) - 1x06
#renegadenelledit#renegade nell#nell jackson#polly honeycombe#louisa harland#ashna rabheru#renegade nell 1x06#nell x polly#femslash related stuff#it's been so long since I've posted a gifset I forgot what I did lol#but I've finally come to terms with some things and am finally in a mood to post#funnily enough despite not seeking out anything with f/f I keep finding it#I've had this set ready for a week#I wouldn't watch the show for it but it was a pleasant surprise#SW never lets me down#actually she lets me down a lot#and this one made me realize that unequal f/f is a pattern with her...#not sure where this is meant to go since nell has kind of barely acknowledged it#but the visual here#I liked the colorblind casting too#also unrelated but when that sofia actress does a f/f role the DA/ADC/KM people will be allll over her#actually I wouldn't be surprised if there are nell/sofia shippers#but their dynamic wasn't a fun kind of enemies to me
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#whatever#sir crocodile#dracule mihawk#animation#crochawk#one piece#cross guild#my art#these are from the past few weeks except the gif which is early january#some are from pengu's whiteboard#i can't believe i'm still drawing crocodile and it's been over two years#this has been an s-tier hyperfixation#catboy mihawk#and autistic mihawk is kinda real to me#also if you're around toronto i'll be at TCAF in May debuting a graphic novel#it's not for fandom but if you're interested in comics and art come by... admission is free#i love mihawk's moustache... i hope he grows it long so it can be twirled / pulled on....
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Fluffy rearing
#trolls#dreamworks trolls#trolls poppy#trolls branch#broppy#trolls fanart#why are they rearing moths?#really wanted to put them in fuzzy outfits and couldnt help but think about fluffy moths#for poppy of course the rosy maple moth#for Branch the inspo was based off of the polyphemus moth but did my own spin on the design (haha at this point it's an entirely new kind)#just with the same size and caterpillar form#i took some liberties with both moth desgins tbh though haha#it was fun to design them#was very delighted to find out how the poly is one of the biggest while the rosy is the smallest (silk moth wise)#moths#please let me know if this needs any tw/cw for bugs#Im really sorry for such a long wait#it has been a very long week…#my art <3#excuse the messiness
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charmed, i'm sure
#homestuck#hom3stuck#jake english#dirk strider#dirkjake#jakedirk#admin draws#fanart#thats what you get for shrimping bro. i told you about the shrimping#to anyone whos been around for a while you can tell im quite obviously obsessed with that pose. that specific way of hugging urself#dirk was never escaping that#i need to draw some janeroxy too it bangs sm and i need to balance out this sausage party ive had going on in my head for the last xyz#how long has it been. how many weeks since ive seen natural light.#whatever.#id keep this to post in a batch with other drawings but it did well on its own on twt so i might as well post it here as is#feel like batchposting several basically finished drawings doesnt do me much good anyways. better serves smaller sketches on the same theme#ramble ramble
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OH MEIN GOTT DAS STAR BELLY SNEETCH IST CUNTENSERVEN
#ggg#great god grove#huzzle mug#iggy's art#OKAY SO I MAY or may not have fallen in love w a certain god#IT HAS BEEN THE ONLY THING ON MY MIND THESE PAST FEW WEEKS huzzle you are perfect and i lvove you i cannot wait to learn all about you#i havent had any time to draw BUT the huzzle bug got me BAD i HAD to squeeze in every minute i could to draw a lil something for it 💦#feels so good to have finally drawn something after so long and huzzle is such a fun design to play w!! will ABSOLUTELY be drawing it more🫶
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("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#lbh#sqq#i've been working through the series of unfortunate events and somehow that series has paired really nicely with svsss#the themes of cycling violence and what's justified and what isn't and what can possibly be done differently#and how trying to bring love and honour into the midst of it really changes nothing but also changes everything#it's just *chef's kiss*#i don't know how i can quite do my thoughts justice but i've spent the past few weeks quietly going between the two series (and mdzs and tg#as well if we're being honest they all hit similar questions and themes) and just reveling in the pain and ambiguity of it#everything is interconnected and it means you can never know what trauma and pain and necessity has shaped a person#each story goes too far back to ever ever EVER possibly see the full extent of it#at that level even communication itself is nearly impossible.#and because of that it's almost impossible to change anything. beat yourself apart and the outcome is the same#and yet ATTEMPTING to change things ATTEMPTING to do the kind thing the honourable thing is absolutely critical#because while you can change nothing you also have the capacity to change EVERYTHING#aaaaaaah i don't even know what i'm saying#but i read the beatrice letters today and the love letter just. killed me.#(obviously i cherrypicked some lines because it's three pages long but those ones felt right)#''i love you like a corpse loves a vulture's beak'' i just. can't get over that line.#to be completely changed. altered. destroyed. redeemed. purified. desecrated. reduced to nothing yet entirely necessary for another's life.#what a FUCKING line#anyway i was either going to blow up from thinking about it or else i had to exorcise it via art from an entirely different series#i've already done svsss and discworld why not throw a series of unfortunate events into the mix#i'll be honest folks i did not expect svsss to be the mxtx series that would fuck me up the most about the main ship#bingqiu is something else. i don't even know how to begin to approach my feelings on it. impossibility and necessity all at once#bizarre#my art
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INTRODUCING...
HOTGUY AND CUTEGUY!!!
#hotguy#cuteguy#gtwscar#gtws#grian#desert duo#scarian#fanart#comic#mcyt#hermitcaft#only kinda tho#guys i've been agonizing over this tiny two page comic for far too long and it's still real rough looking#i have their first meeting and *redacted* sketched and ready to ink but my god#comics are so hard#i don't do a lot of inking so it sucks a little but i love that art style too much#i need a tag for this so if anyone has suggestions feel free to let me know#i will try to post a few pages every few weeks but idk#this will be a series and it will have plot but only a little#nhyhu.art
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Lover, please stay x
#me#this week has been so long#I can’t believe Saturdays over already#hearts a lil fragile this evening
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November 5, 2023 - If you know, you know. If you don't, log off now and save yourself.
It's been 16 years [x] since the WGA strike of 2007 set a chain of events that led to Castiel the angel saying he loved Dean Winchester and promptly dying exactly 13 years later on the night of November 5, 2020, nowadays known as the destielputinelection night.
It's been three years. For some, the night of November 5, 2020 has become no more than a blur of chaos, whilst for others, the memories of that day remain as vivid and raw as back then, even three years later.
It's time to make peace with the fact that there will be no peace. The ghost of destiel has not left and has contaminated the internet, going so far as to causing Supernatural to trend solely because of the use of the Destiel meme to convey the news [x] [x] [x].
Just this morning, it contributed to Putin trending on the hellsite alongside BBC Sherlock.
At this point we might as well just accept our fate.
#i'm waiting for the time this becomes a week-long celebration#why is supernatural trending#look. there's nothing i can say that hasn't been said already a number of times#so happy destiel to everyone that celebrates. and to everyone who watches in horror - i'm sorry#i'm but a humble messenger#spn#supernatural#destiel#deancas#nov 5th#can't wait for the next year considering yhat apprently the next US presidential election will be held on nov 5#putin has a chance to do the funniest thing in the modern history
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