#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.

[inkskinned]

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

[fancyshooting]

THOUGHTS ON A CHARACTER WE NEVER EVEN SEE

THIS IS VERY VERY VERY LONG. EVA (the real one) is now my OC. click at your own risk

everything that's been cobbled together here is based around the idea that ocelot's black armband is a symbol of mourning for EVA for this to be true, EVA would have to die before the virtuous mission, which took place on the 24th august 1964 so don't get attached to him...

DEFECTION

16-year old ADAM might have been feeling apprehensive about the daunting mission ahead of him. in south america, he spots an elusive creature called an ocelot and is intrigued by it. EVA, older and more experienced with espionage (spies are typically not as young as the exceptional legendary offspring that is ocelot, so presumably EVA is older. idk how much older but definitely an adult) uses this to reassure his young companion about the mission, comparing the behaviour expected of him as an agent to that of a wild ocelot's: stay undercover and blend in with your surroundings; don't trust anyone - you work alone; regardless of the duration of the mission, do not forget your goal - don't let your prey (in this case, the legacy) escape. this works especially well due to ADAM's belief that the rare ocelot sighting was fated (in mgs3 he seemingly believes in fate so to him, this sighting in south america is a sign of sorts. ocelots tend not to approach people but he got to see one? while en route to the most important mission of his life so far?? and it's an animal he can relate to as a spy!? fate!! btw what if the concept of fate, a predetermined course of events, was something imparted and reinforced by the philosophers to reduce the chance of him deviating from the life they have set out for him? not cool!)

it's rare for ocelot to show such a high degree of respect to another person, so EVA must have been important to him. we know nothing about their relationship - only that they were supposedly two NSA agents who defected together in 1960. the armband doesn't necessarily mean that they were friends but it does suggest that ocelot held him in high esteem. we can assume that the path of their defection went like this: US -> south america -> USSR. south america is home to the most noble of creatures: the ocelot. I like to think that this is where the "ocelot" codename was assigned

ADAM and EVA are then welcomed into the KGB. we aren't told how many years ocelot spent in the KGB before joining the GRU but we are told that only he, ADAM, has "infiltrated volgin's ranks." there is no mention of EVA, so presumably he remained in the KGB

IMPORTANT: I think EVA was a philosopher agent. ADAM and EVA's defection was a ruse to locate and retrieve the legacy. if ADAM knew, EVA must've known too. I think he acted in the same capacity as ocelot as an agent with multiple allegiances whose ultimate loyalty rested with the US. as a philosopher agent, he would have access to the same network of spies used by volgin and the boss. EVA, of the KGB, contacts volgin, of the GRU and tells him all about this incredible young KGB soldier who would be a great candidate for spetsnaz (in mgs3 it doesn't seem like volgin knows that ocelot has anything to do with the philosophers, so he's being presented as if he has no connections to them). also he's the son of a legendary war hero. volgin, who would normally not engage with a rival KGB man, listens to his fellow philosopher and then, pleased to have an impressionable young talent on his side, accepts. the KGB encourages this and takes it as a success - but it's an even bigger success for the US philosophers. ocelot is supported by the KGB, who believe he is working undercover on their behalf as a double agent. really, he's a triple agent working undercover for the CIA to find the legacy for the US philosophers. as volgin's protégé, he is one step closer to finding it

THE SORROW AND SOKOLOV

the ADAM and EVA defection happened in september 1960, so ocelot was barely sixteen. let's say he spent around a year and a half being trained by the KGB, then sent off to the GRU at age eighteen

in 1962, the year that ocelot turned eighteen, the boss and the sorrow were pit against each other by the philosophers. they were forced to act or else risk the life of their son. at the time, the sorrow worked in soviet intelligence, just as EVA did. EVA had links to the US philosophers, who had abducted baby ocelot when he was born. the boss, in the US, had no real confirmation that her son was still alive but the sorrow, in russia, could have known that one of the defectors had been sent off to work with the notoriously sadistic colonel volgin. EVA could have been the one to tell him that ADAM was his son. the sorrow knew the threat was credible so let the boss kill him. if the boss and the sorrow failed to act, ocelot would have suffered for it. it could've been that EVA would inform volgin of ocelot's status as a spy, which would guarantee him a slow, painful death (in peace walker it's said he would "suffer" rather than "be killed" but in this context what else would "suffer" mean? losing ocelot would mean the US philosophers would also lose their agent closest to the legacy... maybe it was an empty threat all along)

also in 1962 was the first defection attempt of sokolov. initially working under KGB supervision, he made contact with a CIA mole who relayed his request

KGB? CIA? could it have been EVA? maybe but what's important is that sokolov was brought back to the USSR and placed under increased security at okb-754, the sokolov research facility. EVA is here, at this facility. the US philosophers now have ADAM in the GRU hunting for the legacy and EVA in the KGB monitoring sokolov and his highly classified new weapon (zero says that the CIA only have vague information on the shagohod. there is "a weapon" presumed to be nuclear based on test site activity. if EVA was at okb-754, it could mean either the shagohod is so highly classified that he has no access to any relevant information or he is being selective with the information he passes back to the CIA. he's loyal to the US philosophers, not the CIA)

during the virtuous mission, all of the intel snake receives on sokolov's transferral to the abandoned factory in rassvet comes from the boss. zero says she's using intel channels from the war. a lot of those contacts are likely to be affiliated with the philosophers. there's no way for her to know the location of sokolov without being in contact with someone in the KGB. EVA, a fellow US philosopher agent, is stationed at okb-754 and knows exactly where sokolov has been moved to. ADAM is also in contact with EVA (both of them being stationed in tselinoyarsk makes for easier communication) and turns up at rassvet expecting to meet the boss. if ADAM, EVA, and the boss are all US philosopher agents, then the boss' false defection is an operation they were likely all involved in to some degree

BUT EVA WAS DEAD BEFORE THE VIRTUOUS MISSION!!!!

WHO DID THIS!?!?

it was eva💋🏍️🍜🍣🕶️🐕

it's getting more complicated. hold onto your beret

from now on:

EVA - ADAM's defection partner

eva - the fraudster

I'll try not to use their codenames together too much... not that it makes this any less convoluted B)

A FEMALE SPY!?

eva is an agent with the chinese philosophers. the development of the shagohod is probably on the radar of multiple intelligence organisations. she admits at the end of mgs3 that she was never an NSA or KGB agent, so how does she manage to infiltrate okb-754, a facility heavily guarded by the KGB? it's a black factory, a secret development site that is near impossible to stumble upon. she would need to be directed there by someone with the relevant knowledge. it could be that eva and EVA were working together at some point as philosopher agents

maybe EVA was having trouble with access to high level information concerning the shagohod. he knows that sokolov is estranged from his family and is deeply unhappy. EVA uses the philosopher spy network to request assistance. the russian philosophers would obviously oppose sharing sensitive information with their enemies, so are kept out of the loop. the US philosophers cannot send an agent quickly enough from overseas. the chinese philosophers have both an interest in the shagohod/legacy and geographical convenience. they send charm agent eva to prey on sokolov's loneliness, hoping to extract information on the new weapon to benefit both branches of the philosophers. EVA is presumably american (or at least lived a lot of his life there) and eva is indistinguishable from a native of the US, so she is sent in the hopes that her familiarity to the contact will make her more comfortable to work with

EVA helps eva infiltrate the facility as tatyana. glasses + a meek personality usually indicate a character involved in science/engineering, although kojima has referred to her specifically as "a secretary." this would be a much easier position to secure than something highly specialised

now eva is working at okb-754. she should be trying to get close to sokolov but it's unclear if sokolov actually knew her before operation snake eater. at ponizovje warehouse, when volgin electrocutes her, sokolov is upset. sokolov is a gentle character which might explain his distress... but he also calls her "tanya," a pet name that suggests an intimate relationship (only he and volgin refer to her as "tanya"). at this point, eva has probably told sokolov that she is a covert kgb agent and convinced him to go along with her cover as his mistress

in groznyj grad, sokolov tells snake that tatyana "made her way in here by becoming volgin's lover"

"here" might refer specifically to the colonel class wing, rather than groznyj grad. sokolov and snake also have this exchange:

"Snake: How long has Tatyana been here?

Sokolov: Only a few weeks.

Snake: A few days before the Virtuous Mission, then.

Sokolov: She said that Khrushchev sent her."

how can sokolov say that tatyana has been "here" (groznyj grad) for "a few weeks" when they were captured on the same day (i.e. he would have no idea about her arrival if he has never been at groznyj grad without her)? in this instance, "here" could refer to tselinoyarsk. this could mean that they were acquainted at okb-754, where she posed as a spy sent by Khrushchev

if EVA is involved with security, he can help eva get close to sokolov. her seduction of sokolov fails. no information on the shagohod is recovered. instead of returning with nothing, she is then ordered to charm EVA

when snake asks eva over the radio how she was able to procure western weapons from a vault that "should be under strict surveillance," she tells him: "even if I explained how I did it, you'd never be able to do it yourself."

eva is a charm agent. if she wants to access a restricted area, she will seduce the guard. operation snake eater shows that she had access to KGB equipment - the lipstick gun, the button camera and the transmitter she hid in granin's shoes. being close to EVA would allow her to occasionally bypass security and steal technology developed at the facility

VIRTUOUS MISSION

EVA (KGB) is in regular contact with ADAM (KGB + GRU). ADAM warns EVA of a planned GRU attack on okb-754 on the 24th of august. EVA tells eva, concerned for her safety. she then plans to be captured and taken back with the GRU to groznyj grad, the impregnable fortress. this is her best chance to get in. sokolov has already left the facility, so she lies to the attackers about being his mistress, relying on him to back her up later (not sure when exactly she shared this plan with him but he has to know before the ponizovje warehouse scene). this results in her being allowed to live to be held hostage as a work incentive for sokolov

on the 23rd, the day before the attack (saying this because ocelot is already wearing the black armband on the 24th, hours before the attack), eva opportunistically kills EVA, hoping his death will be pinned on the GRU (if EVA was involved with the boss' false defection/sokolov capture, then maybe ocelot expected communication the day/night before that was never received, so he knew something was wrong - EVA could not have withdrawn from a critical philosopher mission like this). eva is under orders similar to those she's following during operation snake eater: charm, use, then kill. killing EVA is a strategic move to harm the US philosophers by removing an agent and source of intel, putting the chinese philosophers in a better position to retrieve the legacy first

this is all tenuous... but this is the most tenuous: in the helicopter, when tatyana's lipstick gun is discovered, ocelot asks "are you KGB?" directly after this, he turns his back and stares outside with his arms crossed. he could be thinking about his recently dead comrade, who was stationed at the KGB facility in the area they are flying over. he only looks out for a moment before turning back. if EVA and ocelot had a good personal relationship as well as being colleagues, ocelot might have known about EVA working with a female agent from the chinese philosophers - this could be why at the end of mgs3 he knows that she is specifically a chinese agent (as well as equipment and shooting style etc. but I'm trying to construct a theory here)

OPERATION SNAKE EATER

snake's presence in tselinoyarsk is supposed to be detectable, so he is instructed to leave the drone that brought him in, which the boss later blows up. when the guards discover this evidence of a foreign aircraft landing, colonel volgin is alerted immediately. eva has been acting as tatyana for around a week, so is already close to volgin and hears that a foreign agent has entered soviet territory. while he is distracted by the threat of the enemy spy, she can slip away to meet snake. she seems to be able to travel back and forth from groznyj grad fairly quickly on her bike so she would be able to reach rassvet soon after hearing about snake's arrival. assuming EVA was working with ocelot and the boss, he would have known that rassvet - where ocelot expected the boss to be and where he's supposed to meet snake - was a possible rendezvous point. this could explain how eva knew to meet the infiltrator there during operation snake eater despite having no genuine involvement with the mission

snake is expecting to meet ADAM at rassvet but is told via radio that the CIA has been given no physical description and no specific location or time to meet up. when eva turns up, she apologises for being late. since EVA is dead, eva is now operating almost entirely on assumptions. she incorrectly guesses that the meeting had been scheduled for a specific time agreed by both parties. this should have been suspicious to snake. eva also mentions being sent by volgin, despite him having absolutely no involvement in the mission (she says this directly after snake asks about ADAM - eva doesn't know this is ocelot but maybe she knew ADAM was GRU because of EVA?). finally, she doesn't know the answer to "who are the patriots?" snake misses all three clues

EVA IS DEAD

at the end of mgs3, it's implied that eva killed EVA:

"The real ADAM never showed up at the meeting place, saving me the trouble of having to eliminate him."

she must have killed EVA in order to use his codename without causing confusion. the CIA names both ADAM and EVA as KGB agents trained "for exactly this kind of situation." ADAM is expected to make contact with snake but fails. we don't know if EVA was ever going to be assigned to operation snake eater but if he was, he also fails to make contact. neither of the KGB agents are able to reach snake. as far as the CIA is aware, eva is EVA and has successfully made contact with snake

the CIA is unaware that the real EVA has actually been dead for around a week. by the time the KGB was able to officially confirm EVA's death, the davy crockett had been fired, so relations between the USSR and the US were strained. the KGB chooses not to inform the US of EVA's death, even at the beginning of operation snake eater when he is expected to cooperate

ADAM cannot alert the CIA about eva being an imposter because the KGB are deliberately withholding the news of EVA's death. to announce that one of their agents has been assassinated by an unknown assailant would bring the security of the mission into question and put it in jeopardy. ADAM is still available anyway and so the KGB sees no need to inform the CIA of EVA's death as long as the mission can still be carried out. when zero tells snake about his KGB contact, he talks as if only ADAM has been enlisted to help. when eva appears instead, there is no cause for concern, as if it was always a possibility that EVA would be involved. the mission goes ahead with eva. whether or not EVA was supposed to help is unknown but directing snake to only one of two named agents suggests that EVA is unavailable for some reason (dead)

if EVA was alive, both he and ADAM would be able to confirm their lack of contact with snake to their superiors and eva would be identified as an enemy spy. EVA especially should have less trouble reporting this as he doesn't have to communicate with the KGB in secret, unlike ADAM, who has to hide his affiliation from the GRU

after EVA is killed, the KGB is hesitant to send ADAM to meet with snake while the assassin is still active. ADAM is told to postpone meeting up with snake in order to draw the enemy spy out. this might be why ocelot looked so irritated when he turned up the next morning - he had been anxious to meet snake again and taunt him with his very exciting new bullet pendant but was annoyed at having to wait. ocelot instead has to check for outside interference at the rendezvous point and brings his unit for backup, anticipating a hostile third party (ocelot expects to be able to speak with snake privately - if there is no spy, then snake will incapacitate his unit. if there is a spy, his unit will aid in the capture and escort to groznyj grad. it wouldn't take his entire unit to do that but ocelot would order it so he can speak to snake alone. he would probably insist to his unit that he has a personal score to settle and will catch up with them after he has disposed of the filthy american dog)

really, all ocelot has to say is "la li lu le lo" to let snake know that HE is his contact, not eva. he doesn't, probably out of pride, petty rivalry reasons and his runaway emotions but also possibly because he is under orders not to. then, he gets another lecture, run over by a motorcycle and flees. he doesn't get another chance to speak to snake privately again

CONCLUSION (FINALLY!!)

EVA:

agent of the philosophers

strong presence in ocelot's adolescent life; mentor

respected by ocelot

intelligence agent for multiple organisations

involved in the sorrow's death

killed by eva

wouldn't it be so typical of ocelot to form an attachment to someone who guides him but ultimately causes him harm? EVA might have played the role of mentor for ocelot before big boss:

ocelot looks up to EVA, who keeps him trapped under the control of the philosophers and is complicit in organising the death of one of his parents

ocelot looks up to big boss, who kills his remaining parent and who ocelot destroys his entire self for

THE END!! THANK YOU FOR READING!! o7

[bibbykins]

can u give us a glimpse into what arguing w/ the princes would be like? love ur work btw!!

You bet! I actually had something written about this ages ago but never finished it so I’ll paste it here and add some more!

Warnings: 18+ (just like my whole page and all my works are)This is where the toxicity and unhealthiness of these relationships show, manipulation, yelling, lying, mentions of sex, mentions of rough sex, mentions of various sexual acts (cunnilingus, fellatio, exhibition) I beg of you to not put up with any of this shit irl let fiction stay in the fictional world yknow? I always ramble in my fics about this but I figured I should add it here for good measure

Jin:

Where the other boys rarely ever just “argue” and it is either a fight or nothing, you guys just argue sometimes, never rlly fight

This ties back to the fierce honesty policy you have between each other, but you both are so stubborn so arguing does happen

You both usually start by saying snarky things until one of you breaks and says what is really bothering them, which doesn’t take long at all

If you cry, congrats, you automatically won bc Jin not only does not know how to deal with a woman’s tears, he cannot fathom his one true love crying

Although you usually try to continue explaining your reasoning bc you don’t wanna win by crying, you wanna win bc you’re right

Jin, similar to Jimin, respects you a lot, so the other girls seldom ever catch him acting like a clown’

His downfall is just being bad at expressing his feelings bc he thinks you just know, like you read minds or something

Jin usually apologizes by asking what you want after he forfeits his pride so if it’s a gift, he’s on it, sex? say less. 

He usually prefers to pamper you for a night, not even cumming during sex unless you tell him to

You’re the one who threatens the other fellas when they’re disrespecting their s/o, intentionally or not, and boy are they frightened. You rlly have a way with insults

Yoongi:

Bickers with you, but doesn't fight and everyone does not understand how bc he’s so standoffish to everyone else

Bc your relationship has the most public eyes on it, gossip columns are floored when they cannot find flaws or rumors of fights, and most are too intimidated by Yoongi to just make them up

You both read each other like a book, so the only time anything comes up is if you don’t like what you’re reading at that moment and vice versa, then a fight might start but it is shockingly rare

If he makes you cry, the fight is over, he lost. Yes, this is a running theme among the guys bc they are all whipped dummies

Very perceptive of your feelings, so never really worries about fighting with you or you hiding anything from him

You know how to get him to fess up so it's not the worst system of communication (still not healthy in the slightest but that’s the yandere life here)

He doesn't really try to lie to you or hide anything since you're also pretty bonkers so if he destroyed someone’s career bc he thought they looked at funny, you just roll your eyes and tell him he’s silly

You are the one that Jungkook and Taehyung are terrified of (It’s just about all the hyungline gf’s they are rlly scared of)

You’re usually so bubbly and energetic, but if you get pissed off, you’re as frightening if not more frightening than Yoongi

I should add Yoongi prefers to make up by marathon eating you out, at some point, it feels like he’s getting a kick out of it, but you’re in no place to complain tbh

Hoseok:

Not a lot of fighting here tbh bc you are still healing and your talent is in deescalating situations and telling people’s feeling

Your job is literally a behavior analyst so you will just deadass be like, “I can tell you’re getting frustrated to a point where effective communication won’t be possible, so how can I help calm you down?”

Makes him go silent real quick and reevaluate everything he has ever thought or done

For this reason, he just sighs and apologizes, genuinely bc you can absolutely tell when he’s just saying it to shut you up

He is the only one that will allow you to leave (the room, not the house) not that you want to leave the building considering the dangers you know are out there

Once you both cool off, you’ll have him state what he thought about and vice versa

You give advice to all the girls on how to do this, but not all of them are brave enough to try

So you go full mama bear mediator and step in when you feel the need

You genuinely frighten these guys bc you have this innate ability to make them feel dumb as fuck

Namjoon:

No fights rlly but misunderstandings happen that makes Joon go manic

You get frustrated bc he does this instead of just talking to you, but he’s learning little by little

The moment you aren’t smiling or trying to make a light joke with him, fight over, you won, he is worried

Bc he knows if you’re not smiling, you’re almost definitely going to cry and when you cry, he cries

You actually implement Angel’s tips and see some improvement with communication as time goes on

Namjoon’s love language in making up is grand gestures, so he’ll rent out a whole restaurant, or take you on a shopping spree to an art supply store, anything that will bring a smile to your face

You intimidate the other guys when they fight with their darlings bc you keep a smile the whole time you are threatening them and holy fuck is it eerie. You usually try to distract the upset girls post-argument with a craft or fun art facts

Jimin:

What makes the relationship work are your selfish tendencies working in tandem with his more sinister ones, but it can’t always work that way

You both test each other all the time despite agreeing on almost everything because the relationship is not a fight for dominance, but control-control you usually win 

The closest you get to real fighting is rough sex, most of the time you have disagreements that you resolve with conversation

It's the most “healthy” (it’s not all that healthy tbh) thing about the relationship and it blows everyone's minds, but it only happens bc Jimin has always respected you, and he genuinely knows that you don’t need him as much as he needs you

But on the extremely rare occasion there is a fight it is never in front of anyone and all hell breaks loose: screaming, yelling, slamming doors, it all seems like endless hell bc you both are too stubborn to say when you’re wrong

Until you cry

He really can't stand the sight of you crying, bc you rarely ever cry. He sees you as really tough and his whole perception of the world shatters once he realizes he’s the cause of your tears

Making up includes, you guessed it, sex. Like calling into work bc you can’t walk sex (Jimin cries during this sex bc he feels undeserving but by round 2 he stops)

The girls come to you post-argument to rant bc you live to talk shit with them to vent

Taehyung:

Rarely ever fights with you, because he absolutely despises doing so and you typically do what he says without question

But when you do fight, it always ends with both of you crying and hugging

During the argument though, he can say some seriously out of pocket shit, bc he lacks impulse control and you take that shit to hear bc who wouldn’t 

The fights are nightmarish and hard to watch bc at some point it just becomes Taehyung losing his mind while you cower until he realizes how much of an asshole he’s being or until you try to leave mid convo

Bless him if he were to ever make you cry in front of the other MC’s, my guy would be ripped to shreds bc the other girls do not fuck around

Hates to ever be the cause of your tears so you both are very quick to makeup and he can spend up to weeks making up for it

I’m talking gifts, money, food, dates, clothes, he is basically your personal assistant that pays you when he feels bad

The girl’s come to you after an argument for quiet time or some cute embroidery time

Jungkook:

You don't fight often, but when you do it's disastrous bc he is wildly paranoid and you are wildly insecure

You almost always go into a panic attack, fearing he'll leave you and he immediately loses all fight in him and feels like shit

And he is absolutely crushed seeing you hyperventilate or clutch your chest while he's yelling so he just stops like mid yell will just close his mouth and take a deep breath before going to you 

Immediately apologizes when it happens

Usually cries with you while he holds you

Another fella that will get torn to shreds by the other girls if they even catch a whiff of him being anything other than sunshine and rainbows to you rip jungkook tbh

He makes it up to you the same way Taehyung makes it up, by shutting his mouth and doing whatever you want, and giving you whatever you want

When the other girls get into an argument with their guy, they come to you for a hug and some quality time distraction

[aseriesofunfortunatejan]

I read Volume 1 of Danganronpa Togami.

Yay. I did it, folks.

So, uhm...

:|

Here’s my spoilers free opinion, right as I finish it. I’d listened to @/drmedicsgamesurgery’s audiobook almost to the end already, though (I’m guessing you’ll see this post anyway, but I didn’t want to go out of my way to tag you since I believe our opinions differ). (Unrelated, but listen to their Danganronpa Kirigiri 2 audiobook, btw, Part 1 is up on their YouTube channel)

I’d say I’m on the fence. This was a fun read in many ways. There are a lot, and I mean a lot of references to both Japanese and international culture, which were helpfully explained by the translator, and they were rather entertaining. A lot of dialogue is, on its own, very quotable, and the Byakuya Togami himself is very diverting throughout.

(More under the cut. My opinions will be entirely spoilers free, save for a few vague indications of plot points which will be introduced in all caps and put in parentheses to allow readers to avoid them if they so prefer.)

I definitely can’t ignore those qualities - the new characters are enjoyable, and the already-established Danganronpa characters are fun and true to themselves (to the extent allowed by the concept of DRT). I wasn’t all that interested in Blue Ink, but I don’t mind her either. The bait using her near the end worked well enough that it tricked me, not that I found that scene enjoyable to read, lol. (More on that in a bit.) The second protagonist, the “mole”, was also a very interesting concept.

Speaking of, Danganronpa Togami explores interesting themes. This probably contributes to how quotable a lot of lines, even those that aren’t dialogue, are. I’m pretty satisfied with having a piece of Danganronpa media touch on those.

... Still... It was a little difficult to read.

This isn’t coming from someone who dislikes reading at all. In fact, I love reading. As a kid, I used to say “it’s my passion”! Pretty passive passion to have if you ask me. Either way, I’m pretty good at reading. The SHSL Reader if you will (no, you won’t). I have to admit that I dislike reading on a screen, but I can handle it.

Basically, I’m being sincere when I say that it wasn’t easy to read. Everything goes all over the place... which I believe is the intended effect, so it might not objectively be a flaw, but I personally didn’t enjoy it! Blue Ink’s narration was especially boring to me, though I can’t put my finger on why yet - I’d hasard a guess that it has something to do with Borges’ regular interruptions, but that might not be all it is.

Again, I don’t necessarily mind those concepts, they didn’t specifically click with me is all. Honestly, it’s pretty artsy, and I appreciate that. I feel like I could have loved it, but it just happened to land right where I didn’t.

I guess I’m ultimately not that big of a fan of its narration and, most importantly, events “going all over the place”. I found it boring, or even a little embarrassing at times, which was a shame when segments with the mole often explored many interesting concepts. I know Danganronpa Togami is already not the most popular Danganronpa spin-off there is, so I’m not trying to kick it while it’s down - since it has so much potential imo. I can see how someone with slightly different tastes from mine would love it, so definitely give it a try and construct your own opinion.

What I seriously disliked was the ending. It literally ruined the one thing I’d actually liked about the novel. I appreciate that an earlier line of dialogue set it up (those who read DRT probably know what I mean ; POTENTIAL VAGUE SPOILERS IN THESE PARENTHESES something about a date)... But to me personally, that’s not enough. I feel like that’s a pretty shitty move to pull as a writer. I’ve seen it done before and I typically dislike it, and I especially wasn’t going to like it this time.

I guess it’s good enough of an ending in that I’m curious about what comes next, but... I don’t know if I’ll feel like reading an entire volume again with this bad taste in my mouth - even though I know that due to the story’s very concept, some things may not be what they appear to be. It doesn’t help in my case, because it taps into something else I dislike, at least that’s the impression I have (POTENTIAL LIGHT SPOILERS IN THESE PARENTHESES: though it’s maybe not literally what’s going on here, stuff similar to “real” alternate universes are usually not my cup of tea.)

I don’t even want to hear any “that’s not exactly what it is, though”, because whatever it is, I’m already bored by it. Sorry (/gen).

Anyway, when I said “more on that in a bit”, earlier, I meant that the scene in which that efficient bait took place was the one that set up the plot twist I hated, so I hated it altogether. I guess I was a little relieved at least because if that one thing hadn’t been bait, I would have had things to say. (I’m being vague so for more clarity, POTENTIAL SPOILERS IN THESE PARENTHESES: the bait I’m talking about is that you believe one character is being attacked, when it really was another).

Ironically enough, I’m all over the place right now, so to wrap this up... The ending ruined it for me, but it’s very subjective. Danganronpa Togami just so happens to do like, at least two things I specifically dislike, but that is by no means an objective review of its writing. (Though I might expand on how the plot twist could actually just be bad in another non-spoilers-free post later on. Might.)

Byakuya and Junko were fun, and I took screenshots of a bunch of fun quotes, so that was cool.

One last thing - a new character is introduced near the end whose talent is like. The worst fucking “talent” ever? What the hell? Please tell me their writing in the next volumes somehow makes it better? At least Kodaka didn’t pull that shit? That’s one more thing I seriously disliked.

Even though Danganronpa Togami undeniably has qualities, it’s to be noted that I rarely actively dislike anything in Danganronpa, so I can’t just ignore those elements in my review... Which ends now. xoxo

[zabreti]

the time has finally come for me to start expressing what i have been overwhelmingly feeling for the past week, since i started to properly listen to this sunshine of a woman named joanna newsom. i want to- actually, i need to vent a little about the album ys, since it’s the one i first listened to. plus my initial contact with joanna’s work and thoughts that came with it

even though i only found out about her a few months ago, i guess everyone knows her(?); if you don’t, you should. there’s not one single moment in which i’m not mad at myself for not finding her sooner. so fyi, she’s a harpist, pianist, singer and songwriter from nevada. according to some sources, she may be the most famous harpist alive today; i really don’t know about you, but it really sounds quite badass for me.

i started searching for her stuff after watching her husband’s - andy samberg - multiple interviews, where he would be sometimes asked about their marriage. i’ve been binge watching random interviews with people i like for the last weeks, and i found myself actually watching some interviews of hers before i even got to listen to her music.

btw, look at this fucking adorable couple. just look at them for a second.

first of all, what a lovely woman! each answer, each laughter, each little thing she did on camera caused an admiration for the idea of andy and her together to grow strongly; i wasn’t even sure if it was ok for me to feel so strongly about someone else’s relationship. my curiosity grew when i started to read the comments on these videos on youtube, pretty much 100% of them being about her intelligence, her talent and how her music sounds angelical, mystical and perfectly constructed. (let it be said that it only grew more and more as i watched every single interviewer asking both andy and joanna about how different their works are, and how different they appear to be as individuals; not only was suggested that andy would probably not rise up to such an intelligent, serious taste as to fall in love with her (he doesn’t even need to say a word for anyone to realize how passionately in love he is with joanna and her entire work), but also said that no one could believe she was actually able to be a goofy, easy-going, good-humored person because of the lyrics she writes. ok, i could spend hours listing the unnecessary questions i identified in these interviews, and how i get easily annoyed by these famous hosts assuming stuff or trying to create an uncomfortable environment; and don’t even get me started on the fact that most of the interviews she was invited to would revolve around her relationship with andy. i’m choosing to let this feeling pass for now, since it’s not my focus today.)

i couldn’t help but start by saying all this since i truly adore andy’s works, and nothing feels warmer than realizing two amazing people are in love and have a family together by choice.

i mean..... ??????? c’mon. greatest couple alive. try and fight me on this.

another interesting thing i found out was that she dislikes streaming platforms similar to spotify, which probably (?) justifies the fact that i never came across her songs, since i use spotify on a daily basis and have been using it to find new artists for the last years. call me ignorant, it’s fine, truly; but i haven’t heard of similar opinions coming from artists, and it made me even more curious to know what this woman was expressing, creating, thinking. she actually told larry king: 

“spotify is a business model. it’s not good. it’s based on the idea of circumventing the payment of artists. (...) i’m not opposed to streaming. i understand that the world is shifting and that the way music is valued and monetized is shifting, and i’m ok with that. and i’m even ok with people not paying for music (...), i just wish that there was a better way to do it that didn’t only pay a company. (...) i haven’t heard of one [alternative to spotify] that seems built the way that i would prefer it to be built.”

one of spotify owners (owners or directors, idek and idec) even replied to her many critics, but she never changed her mind or retreated from defending even her honest, harsh comments about how spotify is “like a villainous cabal of major labels”. for me, that’s a badass woman. not only for expressing herself without giving a damn about anyone who might be offended in this process, but also for choosing the path that felt ethical and worthy, and being recognized all over the world for her talent while following her own ways. i know, right? simply awesome.

there i was, reading the endless comments on her interviews’ videos and wondering what the fuss was all about. there was nothing left for me to do other than to actually start listening to her songs. i could have done it by looking up her discography and starting from her first project, but somehow i stomped into the ys album, which was released in 2006, in youtube itself.

first of all, would you look at this freaking cover?

i found it absolutely gorgeous in each detail; in fact, i really wish to know if there are meanings in the little specific parts of the painting. maybe there aren’t any and i’m just trying to create a more complex joanna in my mind? sure, sounds like me. or maybe there are lots of ‘em and she already said it on camera and i simply missed this video? sure, sounds possible. i won’t lie, i spent so much time thinking about this cover... maybe way too much time. alright, on we go.

there are 5 tracks on the album: emily, monkey & bear, sawdust and diamonds, only skin and cosmia.

at first, i didn’t quite understand what i was listening to. and i’m not talking about the lyrics, i’m talking about the whole idea of the album, the artist, the genre. the conjunction formed by her high pitches and soft, delicious vocal variations, surrounded lovingly by the harp and the violins was very mysterious to me. at first, i wouldn’t be encouraged to keep listening to her. but something kept me there, seated, staring at the screen and paying attention to each second of it. it was an experience. a real transportation. i searched for the lyrics on genius, and anyone that would pass by my bedroom’s open door would see me completely enamored by what i was listening to, like a concentrated kid being told an epic, adventurous, huge, beautiful and complex story. that is exactly how i felt: in the middle of a field, picturing each image she described in the song; each figure, each feeling. she described it all in a way that made me wonder how can someone describe a dream so vividly, how can someone describe anything so perfectly, so fully, and not sound redundant, not sound at all boring. the way the melody and the lyrics fit together, as a gift perfectly wrapped and tightly involved in the most beautiful way. i repeat: it was an experience. it is an experience. this is not something you can listen to at any given time, at any given place; i would not dare to not pay attention each time i would plan to listen to it. this is how seriously submerged i felt by joanna in that moment; in that entire day.

all of this, all of this immersion, all of this dream-like state in which i found myself in, kept growing its roots in me throughout the entire album, in a way i needed to show someone - anyone - joanna before i even got to finish the five songs; and the first one that came near me happened to be my mother. while listening, she actually found it quite pleasing, “like some old movie’s soundtrack” when listening to emily, “like an 1960′s melody” when listening to sawdust and sand, and on she went about the entire album. and this got me thinking about how i would describe her genre; of course, after following her on bandcamp i found out i was actually listening to some folk/pop/avant-garde/baroque pop/chamber folk/indie stuff. sounds about right, but at the same time not right at all, for some reason. i believe it’s fair to say that joanna has a magical, rare quality to her music that makes it different to each one listening to it. i’ve said it too much and i’ll say it again: it’s an experience, a complete, true one. it ressonates with deep, personal places. and, strangely, it makes many people describe the feeling that urges to grow inside their hearts as “home”; and i share this exact same sensation.

i really don’t know if it makes any sense, but see: i cherish my alone time probably more than anything in the world. i have learned to be my own best friend in many ways, and being by myself in some quiet days, at my house, reading, listening, watching and creating is when i can truly be myself. with that said, listening to this album, i felt at home. it made me feel even more alone, and i mean it in the most loving, warm, hypnotizing way. 

the ys album is a relatively quick production to be heard, even though it feels like you’ve been gone for hours, days, weeks on end while listening to it. the amount of literary, historic and philosofical references in the lyrics is magically overwhelming; i simply wasn’t able to snap out of it for a long time, and i have, to this day, re-listened to the album about 5 times. still reading the lyrics again and again, still grasping at some expressions faintly but amazed, still finding out about hidden and not so hidden meanings behind each track. still defining it, every single day.

i hope for the great discoveries i feel like pursuing from her work, and the diverse new singers, song-writers, harpists, pianists, violinists, chellists and musicists in general i’ll try to find, understand and support from now on. i’m thankful for finding out how much i love the mix between an orchestra-like atmosphere and a sweet, honest voice ringing in my ears; and how the words assembled together feels like a psychography.

i thank the universe every single day for the opportunity to discover people like joanna newsom.

[beatsfortheillperth]

Words with Jetson

Our next interview is with a producer and rapper out of a beautiful place known as Tauranga, in New Zealand, This creative is known as Jetson.

He happens to be one of my cat, Rain's personal favourites for sleep time and regardless of the amount of thumping bass Jetson's music creates and picture frames it knocks over, I understand why he sleeps so sweetly.

Probably a lot to do with the fact that bass has rhythm, just like the sweet sweet words Jetson correlates with his word-plays in tracks such as "Milk" and "SENSEI". Not only impressing cats, Jetson has made moves and connections beyond the long white cloud, proving isolation doesn't always silence brilliance. Jetson brings words any generation can hold some sort of relevance to, words that allow one to notice life moves fast and slow and sometimes you just have to chill and become an observer rather than an instigator.

This is something I feel Jetson has accomplished with his rather low-key approach to releases and interviews.

Jetson is a natural, a true prodigy of sound and a sharer of moods, and to me, is a reminder that with a little bit of passion and persistence, great things can happen, whatever your field.

Jetson’s collective and label - Chill Children is evidence of that, as through it , Jetson is able to work and release with producers and beat-makers all over the globe.

emo the optimist, BACKWHEN, fuyu, eets, and junyii are just some of the diverse talents working with Chill Children and everyone on the catalogue are game-changers that make music that’s anointed in chills. 

Creators that push boundaries and portray emotion through sound in the most soothing way, one must check Chill Children.

So with that I hope you enjoy rare words with the nuance wonder, and in his own words.

Sit back, relax, get baked, create, f**k it.

Enjoy and much love.

Hey man thanks for the opportunity to share words. Let's start with a few random quick questions to get things going. Favourite Beverage: Lemon water. Favourite thing to do in your down-time: Make music/skate. Views on Reincarnation: It will be cool if it is true but I guess it doesn't really change anything if it is 🤷‍♂️ Favourite Food: Sushi. Favourite Album of All Time: Tribe Called Quest - Midnight Marauders A song to break it down to: Ethereal & Playboi Carti - Beef A song to chill to: Durand Jones & The Indications - Cruising to the park Do you prefer Sunrise? or Sunset? Why?: Sunset, because I'm never awake for sunrise. A childhood memory in regards to music: I remember saving up to buy Graduation by Kanye West and listening to that shit front to back for weeks straight. Favourite Place to be: Probably on an island.

Thanks for that, so let's start by asking what inspires you to produce and not only produce but continually produce, what to me is an array of tunes fitting so many genres?

Do you have a set of goals in place when you release a track or do you just hit upload and just hope people are feeling your sound?

What I like to listen to is constantly changing so I like to challenge myself to try and make the things that I'm inspired by.

I like to think that you never know what you're gonna get when you listen to my music but I've still got so much to learn and experiment with. I just try have fun with it and not think about it too much.

How long have you been producing music, and what did you find was hardest to get the hang of when it first came to producing beats?

I had no music theory knowledge or anything when I started making beats (I still don't have much) so there was a lot to learn right away.

Probably the hardest thing that I still battle with is knowing what you should release, what you shouldn't etc. It's hard to balance knowing when something is finished and when it still needs work.

Could you give a quick run-through of the process you follow when it comes to making a beat?

I try to change my process as much as I can to keep things fresh and fun for myself. But I really enjoy hearing a sample somewhere like keys, a quote or a rapper I want to remix, then I start working with that piece and see where it goes.

I'll mess around with the beat for a while and sometimes a track comes out. It can take one day, it can take months. Just depends.

Oldies are always goodies in my books and I have to mention your "bumps from 2014" mixtape, it truly is something special.

What inspired those little bumps? What were you doing back then? Also, can you remember the mood you were in when you made them?

I'm glad you like it haha. That was when I really had no clue what I was doing in terms of making beats, I was making all of those 'off the grid' in Ableton so I was placing drums in random places, I had no idea what bpm the samples were or anything. I really didn't know wtf I was doing, just going off of a vibe. 

My mood was really just being excited about making music, I was living in the basement at my mum's house blasting beats on the speakers all day.

[bumps from 2014] - https://soundcloud.com/sleepgodd/bumps-from-2014

You are also a rapper. My favourite NZ rapper to be more precise so thank you for the vibes you create. How did you find out you had it in you to rap and how old were you?

Damn, I appreciate that ✌️ I started rapping with a friend of mine, Jesse aka j cafe when we were around 20. We'd sit in my room smoking weed, and free-styling over beats on Soundcloud all night. 

Then we decided to make a track, so we found a beat and jumped in the closet to record some vocals on the laptop microphone.

We put it up on Soundcloud and I've been addicted to making music ever since.

Link to j cafe’s Soundcloud here - https://soundcloud.com/j-cafe

Cover art for Jetson’s 2019 rap release - bluntscraps

Album cover art by Takuroh Toyama

When did you first start rapping in front of others? What did it feel like in the beginning compared to now when you perform live?

I was insanely nervous the first time I ever did anything live and that feeling really hasn't left me lol.

Except now I know how to deal with nerves a bit better and actually enjoy the whole experience of doing something live.

I definitely think I'm a lot better now than my first time doing it, but I still kinda suck 😂 Staying on topic with your rapping, material-wise you have mad skills, your music is forever helping me chill out so thank you.

When did you start writing down your words and turning them into structured songs? Do you have any other artists that inspire your writing style?

When I was younger I really liked the flow of rappers rather than what they were actually saying.

Dudes like MF Doom and Earl Sweatshirt really influenced me at the start wanting to come up with lines that were catchy and different.

To form an actual track I usually just mumble over beats to get the flow, then I start placing words in the spots where I think they fit.

Does your family know you make music? If so what do they think of it, any dance parties in the Jetson Family Household? 

My immediate family all know and support my music. My mum used to have one of my tracks as her ringtone for years lol.

No jetson dance parties yet, but seems like every year more people in my extended family know about my music.

You were also a member of NZ Duo, Chill Children of which you rap and produce with yet another kiwi talent, both having low-key approaches when it comes to presenting yourselves through social media. What happened with that?

Me and J Cafe started Chill Children as a rap project in the early days but we moved to different places in the world and started doing our own solo projects so things sort of stopped happening with it.

I still credit those times with really getting me started on music though. He's still making dope shit and we'll probably link up on a track soon.

So then it became a sort of collective community, and through your Chill Children Soundcloud, you allow a platform for other artists to have their music heard.

Much Love on the concept, What inspired you to start sharing other artists music and what keeps you sharing? I'm very grateful btw, too many gems.

I work on music a lot with my friend emo the optimist (aka kodama) and we always wanted to run a label/collective kind of thing so we could release music from artists that we really liked.

After me and Jesse started doing our own thing, Chill Children seemed like the perfect place to start doing that.

It's one of my favorite things to work on as we have a hand in working with the artists on every release. I just love that we're able to share so much music that we really like with the world.

Check Chill Children here -

Bandcamp - https://chillchildren.bandcamp.com/

Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/chillchildren

Instagram - @chillchildren

Any new Chill Children material we should keep an eye out for?

We always have new music from new artists dropping so definitely follow our instagram/twitter if you want to stay updated on it.

We're currently working on a phonk compilation with guys like DJ Yung Vamp, Genshin etc. It's gonna be crazy 🤯

Back to your solo releases through your alias Jetson. What made you want to start putting out your material alone? Also, do you have a favourite Jetson release?

I really felt like I had to release music solo to see what I could do.

I've learned so much about myself through that process, became more confident and a better musician.

Probably my favorite rap track I've made is called 'Escape'.

Not many people have heard it but it's on Spotify and other places.

My favorite beat I've made is probably 'dylan rieder'.

Have to ask, are you working on any new releases we should keep an ear out for? If so, what can we expect with your coming releases?

I just released an album on Bandcamp called THROWED TAPES which was really influenced by DJ screw and other phonk producers.

I'm working on a lofi R&B tape for Bandcamp, a lofi beat tape, and I really want to release a rap EP.

Who knows when those will come out though haha

Taking it back a little to your rapping again I have to mention "Milk". What inspires the words in this track?

Also please share the story behind your track "Melancholy"? The words are somewhat mesmerizing, thank you!

With milk, I just heard the beat from bsd.u and really wanted to make something weird that just followed the flow of the beat.

On melancholy I tried to think about what I was saying a little more. The instrumental is so introspective and smooth I knew I had to come correct on it.

THROWED TAPES By Jetson, released August, 27, 2020

Musical Recommendations?

junyii - emo the optimist - knxwledge - j cafe - jesse james solomon - the smiths - dj yung vamp - shuggie otis - hm surf - alicks - MIKE - baccyard - meraki soul - steve hiett I could go on for days though lol

Creatives to keep an eye out for in music and art? Takuroh Toyama (photography) Moebius (visual art) Steve Hiett (photography/music) Any Last Words?

It really trips me out that people enjoy something I love to do so much.

So just thank you for vibing with me, I have a lot more to share ✌️

Support Jetson here -

Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/highimjetson

Bandcamp - https://jetsonbumps.bandcamp.com/

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/artist/2bkf2PmiVyfCqg2uzIFIqJ

Twitter - https://twitter.com/jetsonbumps

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jetsonn/?hl=en

Milk by Jetson (Production by bsd.u)

[linkspooky]

Your analysis on shigaraki's worldview is 😍😍😍. Who's your fav bnha character btw, and what kind of manga are you into? (i mean as in genre, but my phrasing is terrible at times so idk how to put it all in the last sentence)

My favorite manga in the whole world are the manga that run in Weekly Shonen Jump. I read almost everything that runs in the magazine from week to week. I know that’s not technically a genre, but let’s not arguen semantics. 

And now because no one asked for it, my opinion on all of the manga currently running through Jump that I read. 

Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba usually manga in shonen jump slowly get worse over time as they try to stretch their stories out, but Kimetsu no Yaiba is a story that continues to develop on itself and improve the longer it runs. 

The art is phenomenal and has a good balance of when to be silly and when to be drop dead gorgeous. It’s more of an ensemble piece tied together by a big brother trying to save his little sister, and because of that almost every character Tanjirou interacts with is fun and really immediately attention grabbing. 

It’s also a pretty heavy story that deals with death, grief and loss and trying to find life beyond a world that has suffering like that. I’m actually planning to make some meta of it soon, especially with the interactions between Domi and Shinobu. My only real complaint is that it’s deep but not too deep. Usually the demons are always bad and the demon slayers are always good in the end, even if sympathy is expressed for some of the demons. Once again though it does so well in the technical aspects of telling the story it wants to tell. 

My Hero Academia it’s pretty obvious that I like it. The biggest draws for me are the art style and the characters, specifically the villains. Also the idea of a reverse X men world where what are basically the mutants now outnumber normal people and dominate society is a fantastic idea for world building with a lot of options. 

I’ve actually followed Horikoshi’s work for a long time. His two previous works, Oumagodoki Zoo and Barrage both ran in Shonen Jump for a short time before they were cancelled which I find really unfortanate because they both had a lot of potential as well. 

I love both the hero kids and the villains, though sometimes I feel like the villains are more connected to the central conflict of the story than the heroes. It would be nice to see Deku evolve a more radical philosophy then just wanting to save people right in front of him, or protecting the status quo. The heroes should ideally act in response to the villains to create a better world and resolve a problem the villains brought up, but if say the League of Villains were wiped out now another League would be created later because the central problem of the story has not been dealt with. 

Dr. Stone this is a series that almost got cancelled, but was saved by a main character switch. Senku is really likable and unique as a character, kind of a mad scientist archetype who turns out to be the good guy and the hero of the story.

He reminds me a lot of Yoichi from the writers previous work, Eyeshield 21. In that they’re both laughing mad eccentrics who seem like they have little scruples for how they use and treat other people, and yet are surrounded by friends and act as the leaders of their team. They also both have a tendency for strategy over brute strength and like to outwit their opponents. 

The only thing I can say about Dr. Stone is that while the characters are a fun little group of oddballs, they rarely get any deeper than that. The most interesting thing is still figuring out the central mystery of the world and what happened to turn everybody to stone, which is why having Senku as a main character was a really smart move on the series part. 

Yozakura Family This is a new series that I actually really like and hope beats canellation at the two week mark. It’s kind of your basic romantic comedy characters get married in the first chapter promise, but also there’s some really strong character writing with the older brother. He’s one of the few examples of the obsessive and overprotective brother type that was portrayed as actually abusive and damaging for seeing his younger sister that way. 

The premise also reminds me a lot of Katekyo Hitman Reborn, just suddenly getting sucked into the underworld of spies and crimminals when you’re an unlucky loser with no social skills. If the character writing is as strong as it is for the brother I can definitely see a lot of improvement and staying power. 

The Promised Neverland the smartest written series in Shonen Jump write now with the best ideas. The Promised Neverland is all about theme, theme, theme, theme, which is why someone like me who devours stories for their nutritious value and content loves it. 

While there are only about three major characters with arcs that matter to the plot, Norman, Ray, and Emma they are some of the deepest characters in shonen jump currently and the complexity of their relationship and the way they all foil each other is superb.

It’s a story about children trying to escape a neverland where they can never grow up, and live in a world that never wanted them alive. Not only is it just about them though, it’s also about adults who are still inside the system and gave up at one point or another and decided to just live in the evil world rather than change it. It’s a deep story but it’s also undeniably shonen jump, the central theme is about not giving up even in a world that is determined to deny your existence. 

Act Age If you’ve read Chihayafuru this manga has a lot in common with that, because both of them are about very singleminded girls with complex emotions that they themselves don’t understand, finding themselves completely enveloped in a niche hobby to the point of obsession. 

Act-Age is a story that’s primarily about storytelling and the nature of stories themselves, with each arc focusing on an adaptation of either a movie made up for the sake of the story or a pre-written play ie, Journey to the West, Night on the Galactic Railroad. However, it’s also bout the nature of stories, as understood by the perspectie of an actor. 

There are only a few major characters but they all get intensely developed in their arcs. My absolute favorite relationship is that of the main character, quiet on the surface but with deep emotions that she uses for her acting talent with her rival an actress that’s much more like a pop star or idol. Rather than having deep talent she instead uses her ability to read people to appeal to them. She is cheerful and lively on the surface, but empty inside. The way they envy each other and learn to grow from each other because each of them has what the other one desires. 

Jujutsu Kaisen reminds me of really early bleach that was just Ichigo and his teenage friends fighting Hollows. This is one of the manga I definitely reccomend, because it’s one of the lesser known manga in jump currently. The art style has this scratchy look about it which really adds well to the horror aspect of the series. It’s a demon fighting anime with some of the best demon designs, more attention is put on making them look grotesque and scary then in series like KNY where the demons for the most part are pretty good looking still. 

The main trio is very solid, a reckless idiot who swallowed a cursed finger in the first chapter and is continually dealing with the consequences of that, the shadowy, quiet type cool headed one who almost never talks about his past or his true feelings on the matter, and between them the cheerful girl whose a tad on the merciless side. 

Not only are the characters good, but it’s one of the few series where the fights and lore are super interesting. Rather than dealing with demons directly Kimetsu no Yaiba style we deal with curses, which are generated from the human subconscious. 

For exmaple one of the villains Mahito is the embodiment of the fear humans have for other humans, that is the anxieties of life, and the fear and suppressed feelings that go hand in hand with humanity. Because that he’s much like a child curse quickly learning and progressing with a human intelligence. 

The fights, the powers of characters, they’re all used to further develop a really interesting world of curses and the people who live dealing with them that it feels like we’re only scratching the surface of right now and desperately makes you want to figure out the system they have in place for this entire world. 

Yui Kamio Lets Loose - I find it to be a really sweet romantic comedy about a stuck up boy obsessed with appearances and what other people think of him falling in love with two sides of a girl, the uncontrollable Yui that beat him up and constantly gets into fights and trouble, and the perfect demure girl who can only ever be helpless and kind and needs to be protected. It has a feel of a lot of classic 80s high school romantic comedies. The only real problem is that it needs to acquire a plot fast, because it’s at risk for cancellation which makes it hard for me to get invested in a series that might end soon. 

Double Taisei - One of those shonen manga that had a really interesting beginning chapter, but then failed to do anything with it. I think it would work well as a character piece between two personalities who act like brothers in the same body, but the characters aren’t strong enough quite yet to work that way. I do like the character design… 

Tokyo Shinobi Squad - It looked like a ripoff at first but the main character is actually fairly different from Naruto, and the manga itself is uniquely its own thing. I just hope it learns to utilize it’s cyberpunk setting better, because ninjas fighting in a cyberpunk dystopia is a very tropey premise and the story needs to utilize those tropes in order to work. I do like the fact that the main character starts out pretty powerful so it’s not a typical shonen formula about a main character slowly learning to gain power, instead it’s him taking in and being responsible for a kid. 

Manga I don’t read - One piece, Yuuna of the Haunted Hotsprings, Chainsawman, Samurai 8 the tale of Hachimaru, Beast Children, Miitama Security Busters. 

[earlgreytea68]

The Omegaverse Lawsuit

Everyone's been talking about the Omegaverse lawsuit recently, which is a little odd, since it was filed in September, but hey, sometimes that's how it goes!

It literally took me a little while to figure out that the names of the book series at issue here are Myth of Omega and Alpha's Claim. Like, I know this is meant to clearly signal they're Omegaverse books, but it just amused me to be talking about Omegaverse and not have it be a ficcy title. It really drove home to me how very, very different fic is as a genre from commercial original fiction, even when they're hitting the same tropes. 

The first thing to note is that the complaint is not a copyright infringement claim. Instead, the plaintiff, basically a writer named Zoey Ellis, is making allegations stemming from a copyright infringement claim against *her.*

The whole thing starts with a DMCA notice. Under the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, it's really easy for copyright holders to get allegedly infringing activity taken down: they file a notice. The website hosting the allegedly infringing activity is required by the DMCA to remove the allegedly infringing activity basically immediately. The person whose material has been removed is permitted to fight against the notice, but of course many people don't do that. It takes time, effort, and a knowledge of the law. For a lot of busy, sensible people, it's often not worth it. What this means is that DMCA notices are massively abused. We know they are. Theoretically they can only be advanced in good faith, however. So, if you can prove you've got a DMCA notice that was issued in bad faith, well, that could be a thing. 

Which is what this complaint builds around. It doesn't happen often, challenging a DMCA notice on bad faith grounds, but this complaint goes for it, which is impressive. And they allege a decent case because they allege a DMCA notice was issued for a book that hadn't even been published yet. Knowing an unpublished book is going to be copyright infringement before you've even seen it is a talent that you'd be smart to utilize on winning the lottery (if that’s what happened, of course). 

The plaintiff here did what you're supposed to do under the DMCA if you believe your work is fine and provided counter-notices. However, unlike in the case of the original notice, counter-notices can take months to process and resolve to get the works back up. 

As anyone familiar with fandom can tell you, rumors spread quickly. Once the word was out there that a DMCA notice had caused a takedown based on plagiarism, the allegations say that forums picked up on it, defaming the plaintiff's reputation. 

The complaint goes on to allege a pattern of the defendant Addison Cain manipulating social media for stars and reviews. I know we theoretically have standards for how stars and reviews happen, but, really, it's a dog-eat-dog world out there in book marketing. These are the examples in the complaint: 

Idk, if the DMCA notice claims are true, they seem sketchy, but these communications don't strike me as that bad. The truth is, it's hard to know as an author when you're going "too far." You need to educate people as to what's helpful algorithmically, and upvoting five stars and downvoting one stars is helpful. That sounds like what she's doing, providing information so people know how they can help a writer they love. Presumably anyone doing this would seem to care enough about Addison Cain's books to spend time doing this. It doesn't seem from these excerpts like she's bribing people in any way. The second example seems especially bland to me, like, the reader seems to ask if it would be helpful to mark it "not helpful," so the reader brings it up, and then in response to Addison Cain they seem to say that they're shocked anyone would find the review helpful, which seems to me to imply that their "not helpful" designation was a true reflection of how they feel. Surely encouraging truthful and honest behavior on the part of your readers isn't a bad thing, and surely we would not ask authors to explain to readers how to be mean to them, instead of how to help them. So, I don't know, this part of the complaint strikes me as a little weak. I just don't think asking for people who liked your book to review it as scandalous as they seem to think. Like, their exhibit is titled "Review Manipulation," and it includes things like this: 

(which, btw, afa I can tell, is her encouraging people to leave good review on *someone else's* book)

and

Idk, what do you think? Are you outraged by those? 

Moving on: 

This does seem ridiculous to me. She does seem to think that she was the first to ever write a M/F Omegaverse (which the complaint alleges is provably untrue), but also seems to think that she therefore influenced the entire genre to be exactly like her. Idk. This just makes me think, like, ::raised eyebrow:: Who goes around saying "Oh, you know why that's like that? They're all copying ME!" Idk.

(Incidentally, it's interesting that she's claiming to own the straight version of the trope, that the straight version of the trope is the unusual version, because romance is in the mainstream culture dominated so much by straight love stories, and indeed every love-story example in the complaint is a het example. They use "The Runaway Bride" as an example of an enemies-to-lovers trope, which was SO WEIRD to me, I stared at it and was like, ....but all of Harry/Draco exists???? lol)

Asserting that on its own, though, would just make me roll my eyes a bit and move on. Coupled with the DMCA notice allegations, however, it does make it seem like she's trying to claim ownership over the entire M/F Omegaverse genre.

The similarities listed in the DMCA notice do seem like pretty basic aspects of the trope that I don't think anyone can own. 

(There are more alleged. This is just the first few.)

But the DMCA notice does purport to contain reviews that say the two books are very similar. 

(Again, there are more, this is just a selection.) Part of me feels like maybe these people just haven't read much Omegaverse? Or haven't read fic, so they're not used to how tropes work? Idk. Without having read the books myself, it's hard for me to make this call. (And that's honestly how copyright infringement gets decided. You just have to read the books and decide if they're substantially similar in something copyrightable. Which apparently somebody did because the books were eventually reinstated as not infringing, it just didn't happen in a court of law. If this case goes on, eventually some judge is just going to have to sit down and read these.)

And of course the DMCA notice obviously chooses the most favorable to their cause, because there's also this: 

If the only similarities are the rules...that just sounds like the Omegaverse trope. 

The claims itself in this case are really interesting. It's not a copyright infringement case, because the plaintiff is specifically saying they are NOT infringing. Instead, the first claim is a copyright misuse claim (that you're using the monopoly granted to you by the government in an improper way, usually understood to be anticompetitive in a way that the government didn't contemplate as being part of the copyright grant). These are relatively rare but I think it's the right call, that using your copyright to send false DMCA notices would be copyright misuse. 

The defendant has now answered the complaint denying the allegations. Indeed, the defendant asserts that the complaint is defamatory because it alleges Addison Cain has only filed one other DMCA notice in ten years of being a published author and thus she has not repeatedly manipulated the system to shame other authors. It also includes a counterclaim that alleges basically that this lawsuit has been brought for harassment purposes because it’s expensive to defend a lawsuit and they alleged that online sales metrics tell them that at most Zoey Ellis has lost about $2000 worth of sales.

So that’s where the case stands now.

Other miscellaneous observations:

--The complaint has spoilers for the end of Alpha's Claim which tell me I would never read that book. 

--This is what the complaint lists as the common markers of the Omegaverse trope: 

--

You know, people in Omegaverse fics often grapple really hard with consent issues, and I love when that happens, and I'm sad that's obscured in this paragraph. I mean, I know the point of the complaint isn't to talk about the ways in which the trope can be subverted, but anyway.

I'm not a huge Omegaverse person, but one thing I do often enjoy about it is how stark it makes the sexism of our patriarchal society, that the gender that breeds is so devalued and treated as dangerous and cordoned off and loses agency, etc. And then how straightforwardly it often has to deal with that. And I know M/M Omegaverse often skimps on female characters but I also like how much it drives that point home, that it's not a man/woman thing, it's literally just that as soon as someone has to bear the children, that comes attached with all sorts of burdens and expectations. 

And I'm also not saying that every Omegaverse author sits down to grapple with those issues, or should be, or has to be. Just that Omegaverse can reveal so much about how we structure societies. And I'm sad that this complaint is just furthering this idea that fic doesn't really do anything profound or interesting or necessary and is just: 

It's cool, not all fic/writing/creativity needs to serve GREAT INTERESTS, nor should it, but also I think a lot of fic/writing/creativity does, and that gets ignored in favor of dismissing it as frivolous. Idk. Obviously this complaint is not about solving that issue, but it made me think about it. 

--

OR. Hear me out. They could get together and just cuddle for 100,000 words and banter and stuff. Just sayin'. Just throwing it out there. 

--

I'm honestly really annoyed by this paragraph's wording. It sounds so condescending. "Employed a degree of creativity consisted with other 'fan fictions.'" I hate those quotation marks around "fan fictions," like they're not sure those are a real thing. So-called "fan fictions" (which, who calls them fan fictions anyway? who are they quoting there lol). But also, like, what's the "degree of creativity consistent" language. Like, the standard for copyrightability is that it possesses a modicum of creativity. That's it. It's a low bar. We know the phone book doesn't have a modicum of creativity but almost everything else has SOMETHING. So this strikes me as a little...sneering and dismissive, like, "Well, it's just as creative as other 'fan fictions.'" No. It's creative. Fic is creative. This is creative. It's an entire BOOK, that no one is alleging copies anything other than tropes (AS ALL PIECES OF FICTION DO, THIS IS NOT A FIC THING). It's got plot, characters, setting, dialogue -- none of which are alleged to be copied. So, like, just say it. It's creative. It possesses a modicum of creativity. Move on. I have no idea why that weird "fan fictions" reference is in there, Idk. 

--They've got an exhibit that they claim is Addison Cain online statements about the plaintiff, but I can't make heads or tails of them. They're weirdness about how she's wrote the original M/F Omegaverse, but I don't see any references to the plaintiff author Zoey Ellis, other than very vague references like this: 

I'm a little bewildered by this exhibit. I think maybe they might be alleging that Addison Cain set up fake accounts to badmouth Zoey Ellis but if that's the case it's not clear to me, especially since they've blacked out the account name: 

--This complaint has an exhibit that's basically an expert witness on Omegaverse. I love this so much. :-)

--Let's just enjoy this being in a legal filing: 

--This isn't part of the main allegations. This is apparently, though, the kind of thing that Addison Cain has in the past considered plagiarism. Just a small selection, again, there are more. But:

I have long said that writing a sex scene is like writing a cover letter: You’re trying to convey a very narrow series of events, over and over, and there’s only so many words you can use to do it. So comparing sex scenes like this just doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. Sex scenes will mostly inevitably sound similar in isolated sentences like this. It’s so funny, I was just saying to Aja about a gif, “He’s arching his neck to give him access like every heroine in every romance novel.” Because that’s a line we’ve all read in every romance novel.

--

Honestly, honestly, literally every single Omegaverse fic I’ve ever read has this exact moment. (And many of them do it better.)

--This complaint has taught me a lot about how much of a kink some people have for being covered in days’ worth of caked-on semen, rubbed into their bodies and massaged into their hair. Really, the complaint is kink-instructive, I recommend it.

--Honestly to me the most damning thing about this is this exhibit where Addison took matters into her own hands to post the similarities between her book and another book, because I’m just not convinced by any of these, and if this is what she thinks copyright infringement is, then I doubt she understands what it is. Bull all these BTBB/TMO comparisons have been her making her case that these two books are similar, and I’m just dubious. And then stuff like this comes up:

Omegas being tired after a heat, yup.

They…both came up with a futuristic device that has a…screen?

She does end with this:

But I just don’t see what she’s claiming ownership of *other than* these really common Omegaverse tropes that I’ve read a million times. (Which isn’t to say that’s a bad thing. I’m a fic person at heart; I adore tropes.)

Anyway. That’s it. That’s the case so far. Let me know if you have questions, because lawyers can be bad at remembering what non-lawyers might be confused about.

In the meantime, I’m going to dig up some Omegaverse.

[benjaminposs]

MY TOP 10 ALBUMS OF THE '10s

BORN THIS WAY - LADY GAGA 

This record saved my life. When BTW came out, I was just coming to terms with my sexuality, and dealing with my first ever spout of dark depression. To this day, when I feel like I have nothing left to lose, I turn on this incredibly produced, lyrically genius, and inspiring album to make me feel strong. It makes me feel like I don’t need anyone to complete me, and that is a rare feeling when you can feel both enraged and empowered love yourself just by listening to a body of work. 

BORN TO DIE ( THE PARADISE EDITION ) - Lana Del Rey

I have never in my life heard anyone like LDR, and Born To Die is a prime example of that. The Paradise Edition of this record has to be one of my favorites, which then Lana turned into a short film entitled Tropico, which is stunning in every way. Her sultry voice makes it's way through the orchestral swells in her tunes, and always leaves you feeling both heartbroken and understood. As soon as the title track starts, you know that you are in for an experience - not just an easy listening album. That is why BTD will always be one of my top albums regardless of the decade, because it is timeless.

ELECTRA HEART - MARINA AND THE DIAMONDS

Conceptual albums are always a hit or miss for the GP. However, ELECTRA HEART is one that I think is highly underrated. The archetypes Marina explores on this record are done with both wit and utter genius. She becomes Electra throughout this record, and we see her unveil a lot about herself through the use of these characters.

ARTPOP - LADY GAGA

Perhaps one of the most underrated and under appreciated albums of this decade is ARTPOP. At the height of what feels like a spiritual awakening for LG, Artpop was done with such admiration for high art, fashion, and pop music mixing all the elements as Gaga does for the greater good of love and humanity. As she sings “We could, We could belong together...” There is a sense that she knows we are all connected, but society has denied us of that true connection that we only find in art and music that tries to push the boundaries. Lots of innovative things Gaga wanted to happen with this record happened, while most of them were changed because of the normal record label game that artists experience when trying to also sell a record. Artpop has aged like fine wine, and I really do feel the GP will look back on it as one of the best records ever constructed. With producers Zedd, Madeon, DJ White Shadow, and others, it was way ahead of its time.

EMOTION - CARLY RAE JEPSEN

This is what pop music is. Carly Rae is THAT pop girl as the kids say, Emotion was one of the best albums of the decade. It proved that once again, CRJ could write an entire record of bops both fast and slow of pure pop bliss.

STARBOY - THE WEEKND

I was lucky enough to not only see the tour for this album, but to dive deep in love with the concepts in this record. We hadn't really seen anything like this from The Weeknd. Sure, he has tons of tracks, but not like Starboy. Every track hits the right way at the right time.

HOPELESS FOUNTAIN KINGDOM - HALSEY

A conceptual album based off of Romeo & Juliet, HFK is a force of sound you can’t mess with. Every song has a pivotal part to the grander story. I fell in love with this album immediately, and songs like Alone and Sorry tugged on my heartstrings. So many real, and profound lyrics in this record.

RAINBOW - KESHA

One word... Praying. In the midst of me healing from a recent sexual assault / rape trauma, one song came out that helped me heal a lot... followed by a body of work from a fellow survivor of abuse. Kesha is such a brave soul full of honesty, grace, and light. I am so thankful she made this album, and experimented with her sound in the way that she wanted to.

YOUNGER NOW - MILEY CYRUS

Quite possibly one of her most iconic records... not to mention that album cover, Younger Now made a huge impact on me. Thinkin’, Die For You, Rainbow Land with Dolly, and the title track are such incredible songs for Cyrus.  Also, I love the fact that this record was released on the same day as my own first full length album. Definitely one I go back to time and time again.

REBEL HEART - MADONNA

I have always had a respect for Madonna, but digging into here discography this past year, I discovered so many songs especially on this album that moved me. It is fierce, unapologetic, honest, and iconic. The journey M takes us on is remarkable, and full of enlightenment on what it takes to be a rebel. A whole lot of symbolism, talent, and faith in the bigger picture,

[noonachronicles]

I will never forget the injustice that Winner suffered with really really. I will think about it on my death bed. But for real, that one was obvious snub, and regarding Halsey and her minions, i never really believed her “i love kpop and bts!!” I mean sorry but this girls knows nothing about kpop and injustice happening there. Seeing some uuus in one average bts song does not make you an expert. She is just in for the money let’s be real

BTW, I decided that you’re my friend and you have to accept it. What do you want for the holidays? Let me know.

I can believe H loves BTS, but only because they trust it and I have to believe that of the seven of them at least one of them has the ability to know when someone’s motives are off. I’d agree she doesn’t know about kpop though. She’s typically pretty outspoken and hasn’t said a single word about anything else going on other than the nom, from what I’ve seen. So...it’s sketch 🤔 Her comment about the US being behind on “the movement” came off as really disingenuous as a consequence.

I mean she’s right, it’s true. Not just kpop but all asian artists are underrepresented in the American award systems. But like.... anyone that’s not white is underrepresented. Anyone that doesn’t fit the package the industry is trying to sell doesn’t get represented. Which is why it confuses me EVERYTIME people get pressed about not getting acknowledged.

There’s literally a post on twitter going around of the group of people in charge of deciding nominees for the Grammys and it’s a bunch of older white people. So either you care about the Grammys and the nominations, or the people deciding them don’t represent the majority (or you). In the case of the latter, awards and noms shouldn’t mean shit to you unless that changes because why do you care what a bunch of people who don’t represent YOU decide is worthy?

The western entertainment industry is BOGUS and I don’t know why people find it so important. Please stop feeding into western culture believing that it’s the only thing that matters in the world. The ego is big enough, my guy. Awards systems are BOGUS and very flawed and rarely do any of the awards actually mean anything. They don’t equate to talent or success, sorry they just don’t. IF YOU TRULY BELIEVE TAYLOR SWIFT HAS MORE TALENT THAN BEYONCE BLOCK ME.

Drake honestly said it best in his speech and I wish people would focus on that. BTS had stadiums packed with fans. People were out in the rain for them. People got sick for them. People spent THOUSANDS of dollars to see them multiple times...the SAME concert several different times. People drop cash on them instead of buying food for the week.

Why isn’t that enough? For everyone. Why are people so mad about a Grammy when THEY ALREADY WON AT LIFE. They want for nothing. Their struggle is over. That should be enough. The love and adoration of millions of fans should be enough. Why do they need the acknowledgment of a bunch of older white people on top of that? Just to add it to the list of accomplishments you get to spew at haters?

Oof. Sorry. I really didn’t intend to go off but I just have a lot of feelings about it.

Me: Awards are bullshit 🤬

Also Me: WINNER WAS ROBBED! 🤬

Basically, don’t listen to anything I say.

[theladipage]

Mom Style has a Fashion Moment - LaDi and the Bump-friendly Movement

Bump-friendly fashion is here friends.

Recently, we had a fabulous fashion show event in NYC featuring some of my beautiful mom-friends in new styles from our LaDi collection.  Our models were a gorgeous mix of moms and moms-to-be in different stages of motherhood including a recent preggo and one mom that was just 2 weeks away from giving birth!  Some of these ladies have 1 or more kids and they are entrepreneurs, executives, students and all are beautiful in their own way.  They are all superstars in their own right and they strut the runway that night like the supermodels they are.  Moms are the real supermodels.

Bump-friendly fashion is what I like to say are stylish clothes you can wear during or after pregnancy.  They are on-trend, sexy and made to enhance the woman that wears them whether she is pregnant or not.

Moms are under-represented in the world of Fashion

Ever since I discovered that cool clothes were simply not available for my growing bump, I’ve made a point to change that.  It was during my 3rd pregnancy almost 5 years ago that I finally started making my own “maternity” clothes.  Yes, you read that right.  I got tired of shopping in the regular department stores and in the maternity stores to create looks.  I was having to get super creative and going nuts piecing some of my old pieces with new pieces every day and especially when I had an outing!  Going-out clothes were definitely not made for the preggos (not any good ones at least).  And I love to get dressed up even with my baby bump.  I kept wondering why there was no FASHION for pregnant people?  Women get pregnant.  There should be more than rouched t-shirts and cardigans to wear out.  So why?

Well, it turns out maternity is not the best market in the business of fashion.  People tend not to buy maternity clothes, considering it’s a temporary solution to a temporary condition.  So, major manufacturers focus more on offering basics (lots of basics), rather than innovative or trendy styles.  (Think t-shirts, t-shirt dresses, more t-shirts and cardigans.) This keeps inventory safer to have and design and aesthetics very low maintenance from season to season.  The offerings barely change from season to season.  They also make the fit baggier because, though it is less flattering on most, it makes it easier to accommodate a large segment of the population with very little tailoring involved.  The final result: a bunch of basic, casual clothes that never really fit quite right.  Clothes  that you would never have bought in the first place and that you finally caved to when you really couldn’t fit into anything else anymore.  It happened to me the first 2 times around.  But, by the 3rd pregnancy, I was done.

Creating what I wished already existed.

So, I started designing pieces that I could wear out to dinner, on date-nights and  to parties that made me feel good about myself!  Most importantly, I made them to be fun and easy to wear.  It’s so good when you don’t have to muster up a lot of energy to look fancy.  Just put it on and go!  They are designed to flatter so that you don’t have to sacrifice style while your body adjusts.

Here’s my Why

Inclusivity.  The industry standard has been shaken up for years because it doesn’t represent the majority of the population.  Unlike the ideals for beauty represented by traditional runway models, we are not all 5′10, size 0 or eternally 16.  We change, we grow, we get pregnant and we change again.  But we rarely see a reflection of ourselves on the runway at NYFW.

I wanted to put motherhood on the runway.  We don’t all look the same, but we are all capable of looking incredibly gorgeous.  I know that.  I do that.  I wanted to make that a possibility for every woman.

The Collection

This collection includes new styles that push even a bit further.  I encourage women to really dress up, to wear color and to have fun with it.  Every style has a simple detail, a particular point of interest that makes it memorable.  And I love that so much because many times we turn away from cameras when we are pregnant because we don’t feel like ourselves or we don’t think we look good.  And we miss out on creating memories of this special time in our lives that will never come again.

I personally love fashion and I know the positive impact that our clothes can have on our everyday lives.  It is true that if you look good you feel good.  And I’m here to create beautiful things to wear during the most beautiful times in our lives, one piece at a time.

Follow along with us as we grow and bring a new vision for motherhood come to life on Instagram.

Here’s a video recap of the show.  The new pieces will be dropping into the shop starting 9/29 and we’re really excited!  All paper flower decorations are also available at the shop for your delight.  Go check out our online boutique where everything is exclusively designed and lovingly hand-made for you.

BTW, the little guys taking a bow with me at the end are my 3 babies and my greatest inspirations and supporters.  Enjoy the show!

Before you go... thank you!

I have to say a big thank you to all of the amazing talents that collaborated with me to make this event so fabulous.

Models: Ariana Bello, Ana Martinez, Shaquita Garcia, Jules Cruz, Jenny,  Lory Linette Diaz-Valentin + Isabela Valentin (baby) 

Collaborators: 

Carlina Zacarias, Samara Vega, MizzLula - Makeup Artists

Nikki Vazquez -  Pretty Nikki Jewelry

Zayda Rivera - PR

Karen Soriano - Karen Decor Balloon arrangement

Darleny - Cake Pops and More Branded Goodies

Dahiana Perez - MC

Michael Alberto - Venue including AV and Set Up

Miguel Pichardo - Videographer

Daniel Valez - Photographer

Sponsors:

Maybelline

Spa O on the Go

Reaching Heights Wellness & Coaching

Silvia’s House Cleaning

The Birth Deck

Luimy Pure Romance

Special thanks to Alicia Diaz-David for all the love and support! And to all my family and friends for always being there!

[kingofthewilderwest]

What do you do most of the time when you’re not on tumblr?

Thanks for asking to get to know me!!! I do MANY things! :D 

Let’s get the “boring” thing out of the way: work! Occupationally, I work remotely as a theoretical linguistics contractor. Basically, that means I do freelance language analysis work for other companies. I sit at home in my pajamas at 2 AM listening to folk metal while doing boring repetitive language tasks for money. XD Usually, it involves me pouring through large databases of sentences and annotating pertinent information on top of the sentences, coding it according to the information another development team wants. What I input is what another team uses to improve an AI’s ability to understand English. For instance, maybe I’m going through a large corpus of sentences marking what the verb is, and how noun phrases relate to the verb (as the direct object, subject, etc.) My work helps accomplish a variety of practical uses. The reason why your search results are relevant on a website? The reason why virtual assistants like Siri are able to answer a question you ask it? That’s the stuff I work on, although I do the non-technical, non-programmy side of it, and am more or less just following instructions for what they want me to look for in the sentence databases they use to train their AIs.

I usually am held to non-disclosure agreements, so I can only say so much about what my work involves, but I have had the pleasure to partner with several collegiate universities, Amazon, the Mayo Clinic, Google, environmental research centers, local companies, and more over the years since I first began these gigs in 2012.

But like. Recreationally?

I LOVE DOING CREATIVE THINGS!!!!!!!

I’m usually running around doing three thousand eight hundred forty two and a half projects any given day. Music composition for indie films and video games; cosplay; fanfiction writing; original novel writing; learning new musical instruments (I own literally several dozen instruments…); drawing; Photoshop abuse; video game streaming; skiing; hiking; teaching myself new languages; collecting action figures and other rare fandom materials; getting distracted by cat videos; crying in feels over television shows; staring pointlessly at a wall for several hours; you name it! 

At the moment, I’m working on a fancy pants fanfiction novel for Camp NaNoWriMo - which I hope I’ll be posting online in the next few months. I’m creating/planning cosplays for Envy (FMAB), Catra (She-Ra), Rufus (Deponia), and Krel (3Below) to debut at a cosplay convention in May (assuming I get my act together, which I probably won’t, let’s be real). I’m playing Anthem with my sister and brother-in-law and am streaming video games most Wednesdays on my twitch account - also now available on YouTube btw. I’m learning how to use illustration markers and digital art tools, while trying to improve my ability drawing humans and backgrounds. I’m teaching myself 日本語. I’m working with several friends to translate a book from German to English so we can play a roleplay game together where I GM (none of us speak German… whoopsies). I’m going to be drawing illustrations for a children’s book my grandpa wrote. I’m drafting the outline for an original novel I hope to publish in the future. I’m arranging a music suite for some of the Huzzah songs for the Deponia video game series. I’m talking with several friends about movie or game projects we could make. I’m playing Dungeons and Dragons as a gunslinging True Neutral alien. I’m planning several fandom AUs with friends that might turn into comics, fanfictions, or getting lost in the dust because I have a notorious, terrible record for finishing anything. I’m skiing with friends in the mountains before winter season ends. I’m trying to collect several difficult-ish-to-find FMA materials from eBay. I’m trying desperately to avoid making an AMV for a ship I’ve fallen into, but it’s probably going to happen despite my best efforts (damn Deponia has my heart right now, okay???). I’m haranguing my irl best friends by being a loving assholish punster gremlin to them. I’m wasting lots of my hours screwing around with friends on discord. And, I haven’t had the time yet, but I just bought a ukulele, so I want to get around to learning that, too. Only so much time in a day though…. uhhhhh….

This doesn’t mean all my projects are good… I am not talented in all these respects… but that doesn’t mean I get any less enjoyment out of all these creative hobbies!

I SWEAR I’ve recently been trying to limit the number of projects I’m doing at any given time. I even made myself a checklist for activities that I “allow” myself to do so I don’t start three hundred more pointless hare chases. But yeah! That’s the current day-to-day activities of Haddock!

Actually… this conversation is a good lead-in to something I’ve been meaning to say on my blog for a while. 

It’s probably unsurprising that, given as I’m doing so much beyond tumblr, that I haven’t been spending an enormous amount of time answering analysis questions recently. My asks have begun stocking up over the last few months; though I have several hundred responses to answer and want to answer, the truth is that my life is prioritized elsewhere right now and I probably won’t get to things all that fast, if at all.

Tumblr has been an extraordinary experience for me and I’ll never like, leave-leave it behind. I’ve engaged a lot in tumblr because it’s provided me life, fandom, happiness, and a community I’ve attached to. It’s also given me hope: hope that my contribution to the fandom gives people happiness and meaning, too. Fiction is powerful for all of us and a way to give us inspiration and meaning. I hope that my engagement in fandom has helped other people feel happiness, inspiration, and meaning, too. Whenever I receive asks from people telling me kind things about my blog, I feel touched beyond words, because it makes me feel like my time on tumblr has been a benefit and a difference to other lives beyond my own, and there’s nothing better than that.

But I also admit: I’m ready to transition to New Things in life. My greatest goal in life is to make as meaningful of a difference as I can. I don’t want to breeze by my years doing nothing but recreation for myself: I want to do what I can to make a maximal difference in the lives of others for the better. Tumblr’s been fun and I hope I’ve made a good impact, but my deepest dreams and goals aren’t around tumblr analyses. They’re around creative writing, especially the wild dream to someday be a published author. I’m increasingly taking the steps and time to reach that goal. I’m done waiting; I’m done planning; I’m ready to charge forward and make this ambition reality, best as I can. 

That means that, anymore, tumblr is a hindrance to my life’s greatest dreams, and I can’t do both full-tumblr-activities and reach my heart’s deepest wishes.

I’m honestly feeling a lot happier now that I’ve drastically reduced my time on tumblr. I’m so sorry that it’s resulted in me not answering many asks (that really would be fun to talk about), and I hope no one feels like I’ve forgotten or snubbed them. I’d do it if I had time. But I don’t have time. The truth is that I feel my life shifting to new directions, and I want to take that. Otherwise, I’ll live in a stagnant world in which I go nowhere… and I can’t have that. I can’t. I want to fly.

So I’m going to be continuing to march through with these other life projects. With the creative writing especially. I hope I can post some of this writing to you guys on tumblr, too! It means I’ll be spending less and less time on tumblr, doing analyses not-anywhere-as-often-as-I-used-to (I don’t know if I’ll ever answer everyone’s asks again, sorry!). Leave tumblr? No. I’ll still be here. But… my shift in time… it’s all in the dream to make meaning out of my life.

Thank you so much for asking again! I hope you’re having a great day, have some fun activities of your own, and are staying awesome!

[baby-daddy-bella]

Hey! Can I get a Bowers gang ship? I'm 5'2 and very skinny. I have long hair, it's like a dirty blonde, with red in it. (Weird ik) I have hazel eyes. I'm shy until I get to know someone, or I'm just talking to a random person (there's no in between) I'm always tired. If I didn't have to leave my bed I wouldn't. I love to listen to music and read. I legit suck at all subjects in school but English. I'm kinda insecure. I have 5 over protective brothers. And when I'm not reading I'm watching TV.

      Bowers Gang Ship

Request 3

A/N: HEY ALL, IM SO SORRY ABOUT THE HUGE DELAY ON THESE, BUT THEY TAKE ME A WHILE TO WRITE & I AM THE QUEEN OF PROCRASTINATION. ENJOY THIS ONE! I have been reading some really trash fanfiction atm as a joke (that accidentally turned into a weird, painfully hurtful addiction) and I have actually lost masses of brain cells from the experience. I’m sorry if this shitty because of that lmao. Requests are still open! REQUESTS ARE NO LONGER OPEN

I ship you with…

Patrick Hockstetter 

(I promise they wont all be Patrick and Henry lmao)

> I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again…PATRICK LOVES SHORT GIRLS. 

> He loves the potential of a hidden feisty temper (as a short girl, I know that this is true in most cases)

> The combination of you being short, skinny and generally shy means that Patrick views you as weak and incredibly inferior to him (even if this is not true) 

> Due to this, he loves to both physically AND emotionally manipulate you

> Funky, cool hair? You gotta bet it’ll be wrapped around his lanky ass fingers 24/7

> This creepy ass boy LOVES to run his sweaty hands through that shit at any time he can 

> 5 overprotective brothers? Patrick THRIVES in irritating them in any way possible. 

> Whether it is continuously leading you astray, being really creepy & touchy with you around them, or even directly threaten them for practically no reason, he will do it just for kicks. 

> You being insecure is also a huge point of his interest.  

> Let me go off about this real quick 

> Patrick, as we all know, does not properly understand or experience usual human emotion, including the feeling of insecurity, so he often has mixed responses when you are feeling particularly insecure. 

> This greasy boy will either get super touchy-feely and treat you like an ABSOLUTE GODDES….or he will say/do something stupid and make you feel worse

> There is no in between 

> He also uses the insecurity to keep you around, no matter what he does, as he realises that you don’t think you’re good enough for him anyway (bitch u are btw idc if you’re anon & idk who you are)

>  He is initially intrigued by your usual shy nature around the majority of people and the way that you got flustered and nervous when he first tried to speak to you

> You guys often listen to music together and recommend new stuff to each other

> That usually happens when the two of you are laid in bed all day together, one of your favourite things to do together

> AND (get ready for some unnaturally soft Patrick)…

It was only two weeks into the new school year and you already had a huge pile of homework to do. The night was humid, so you had cracked open your bedroom window, put on a large t-shirt and sat down at your large desk to start some of it. 

A light blue cassette player blasted ‘Like A Prayer’ by Madonna through your flimsy headphones, which were carefully balanced in front of your high ponytail. Unbeknownst to you, Patrick Hockstetter slid through your open window and set his dark eyes on your figure. 

You already stared with a look of frustration at the maths equations that had to be completed by the next day. He watched you intensely, finding your struggle quite interesting. He watched, from across the room, as you twisted a pencil between your fingers. 

A sigh left your mouth and you were startled when you took a passing glance in the small mirror on your desk. Realising immediately who the intruder was, you remained calm. 

“How long have you been there?” You asked in a monotone voice, with a hint of a smile. You watched carefully in the mirror, as Patrick strolled towards you confidently, radiating confidence and amusement. 

“Not long.” He simply said. Patrick clumsily grabbed the papers on your desk and dropped them onto the floor, causing some to flutter astray. He climbed onto the wooden surface and sat facing you. Having stayed perfectly still throughout his actions, you simply admired his features. 

He roughly grabbed your chin and brought his lips to yours, engaging in a kiss that immediately became intense. You pulled away quicker than he wanted you to, leaving him slightly irritated. 

“Sorry, Patrick, but I don’t really have time to do anything else right now. I’ve got a mountain of homework and most of it has to be in tomorrow, please don’t be mad.” 

He nodded, leaning and turning his head to look at the sheet of paper that was causing you so much stress. His eyes scanned over it for a moment, as you were warmed by his attempt to help, “Oh it’s alright babe, you probably wont-” Patrick cut you off, “17.3.” he said. You smiled at the effort, but figured, since he rarely even turned up to class never mind paid attention, the answer must be wrong. 

Patrick snatched the pencil from your grasp and turned the paper towards himself. He proceeded to write down a method and answer below the difficult question. Once finished, he slid it back to you. The method was perfect and now the answer made perfect sense. Patrick smirked at your astonishment.  

“How the hell did you even do that?” You asked, with one eyebrow raised. Sure, you knew he was naturally intelligent, but you had no idea that he was blessed with the rare talent of being able to do such complex algebra…without a calculator. 

He chuckled, “Guess I’m just smart, huh?” You smiled in return and he turned the sheet back around to himself and completed the rest of the equations. 

By the time you had started your English essay, Patrick had already finished your maths homework. He slid off the desk and waited for you to move off of the chair for him. Only a moment later, you stood up and allowed him to sit down instead, before getting onto his lap. 

Patrick watched, with his chin on your shoulder, as you completed the rest of your homework, with him contributing answers every-so-often. 

You turned round to him once you had finished and straddled his waist, “Thank you for the help, baby.” You said quietly, placing a soft kiss on his lips. He smiled and twirled a piece of your hair around his finger. Finally, he had gotten what he had come for in the first place – you without any distractions.  

[wannawrite]

Type Of Boyfriend: Yoo Seonho

who?: Cube Ent / Pd101S2’s Yoo Seonho genre: 🌸 type: bullet point blog navigator. • how Yoo Seonho would be your boyfriend • with added Christmas spirit ahhh thank you for requesting @isaluciavevo this, it’s so long overdue I’m sorry Seonho is so freaking cute my heart can’t take this - Admin L 

• hmm Yoo Seonho • 1/2 of my Cube chicks • y’all know this boy is wild • in the cutest way possible • Seonho goes to the same high school as you do, Cube International Academy • and he’s the vice-captain of the basketball team • captain - Lai Guanlin • Seonho is generally a bright and cheery person who doesn’t have trouble making friends • or keeping them • he practically knows the whole school • THAT Sophomore who is always hanging out with Seniors and Juniors • it’s also kind of pressing how a Sophomore is already the basketball captain • how shady • but that’s because Seonho enrolled into Cube because of his basketball skills • he was scouted when he was in middle school • and look where he is now • playing for one of the best high schools • talent • simply pure talent • can’t relate • but anyway • you’re new to Cube • you transferred over from C9 Academy • bye bye Jinyoung • and your transfer time was at a very odd time of the term • they decided to shove you in right when the last term started • which is around September and exams start in October • It isn’t the first time you’ve transferred schools but you didn’t exactly expect the principal to take ‘as soon as possible’ seriously • it was like they tossed you into the Lion’s Den with no prior warning • who gives prior warnings anyway.... • bad analogy but moving on • Cube is kind of intimidating no lie • there’s good looking and popular people everywhere • you feel out of place :( • luckily, Eunbin, the girl who is assigned to take care of you, is very sweet and introduces you to her friends too • even Wooseok, who sits next to her in class, welcomes you with open arms • you end up spending a lot of your first week with them • one day, you’re walking towards the cafeteria with Eunbin and Wooseok when a loud voice yells from behind • ‘HYUNG!’ ‘NOONA!’ • awkwardly, you stand to one side as a boy embraces his friends • it’s that weird thing when you’re with your friends • and they bump into their other clique • like • ‘uh hi idk if she’s been two-timing us’ • ‘who is the actual best friend.’ • ‘does she spend more time with me or you’ • except you can’t compare because you’ve only known people for two weeks • ahah • rip • take an L • sadly • ‘oh! Seonho, this is Y/N, they just transferred over from C9.’ Eunbin introduce, grinning from ear to ear • you smile shyly and wave • socialising 101 • Seonho brushes his fringe out of his eyes, beams brightly and waves back • HEART MELTED • his eyes just sparkle with happiness and they aren’t hidden by his huge spectacles • they’re too prominent • TOO BEAUTIFUL TO BE HIDDEN • ‘hey! Seonho, let’s go!’ A group of guys holding basketballs and dressed in their sports uniform shout • Seonho nods • ‘okay! I’ll see you around then guys. Welcome to Cube!’ • he skips away to join his friends • you’re left with your mind in a mess • honestly, he’s one of the cuter guys in your grade • actually, correction • the cutest guy you’ve ever seen • there’s no doubt about his physical handsomeness • not one • he’s good-looking, well-proportioned, has a sensible haircut • hair makes a HUGE difference • ‘oh!’ Eunbin clicks her tongue on the roof of her mouth. ‘you think he’s cute don’t you?’ • ‘n-no...’ • Wooseok ruffles your hair. ‘of course you do! you do! who can’t find him adorable?’ • ‘well, in THAT way but-‘ • ‘so you agree? you think he’s really cute?’ he teases more • You open and close your mouth several times, looking like a goldfish • ‘shut up.’ • Wooseok and Eunbin burst into laughter, playfully poking at you • you just wanted to eat lunch in peace, now look what happened :( • and they’re serving pizza today! • in the queue, Wooseok suddenly says, ‘how many times do you think Seonho or Guanlin queued up for pizza?’ • puzzled, you speak up. ‘aren’t we only entitled to one serving?’ • Wooseok just chuckles. ‘idk what goes on at C9 but this is Cube. no one will really pay attention if you take more than one plate, trust me, and I wouldn’t worry about Guan or Seonho, they’re pretty much Cube royalty’ • and that’s how you figured how popular and significant Seonho was • extremely • the next day, you found a sweet post-it stuck onto your locker • ‘y/n, hope you have a great day! talk to me if anything!’ • and there was also a bar of candy taped onto your door • your heart fluttered • madly, actually • you felt so special, like you owned the world • then, the boy next to you opened his locker and out came a similar looking note and a bar of chocolate • ‘awww! Seonho, he’s the sweetest.’ • o h • the boy collected his books and left with a bright smile on his face, ripping open the chocolate candy bar and tucking the post-it into his wallet • oh wow • your face flushed red and you crushed the post-it and shoved it to the very bottom of your backpack • you wish you could stuff your feelings back to wherever they came from • it was embarrassing to feel so special and close to someone you had barely made eye contact with • Seonho was just that guy who liked to present his friends with acts of his love and kindness • while he was incredibly popular, he was still humble and true to himself • cute • so so SO cute • NO SWEETIE YOU CAN’T FALL FOR HIM LIKE JUST THAT • N O • love at first sight :”) • you kind of dread today knowing that Seonho doesn’t share any classes with you   • sigh • in science, Wooseok suddenly turns to you and asks, ‘hey, do you mind helping me return some books to the school library today? I would but Mr Kim called me up for math remedial and then I have basketball practice right after...’ • being the nice and kind friend you are, you agree to help him • ‘ah shit,’ he curses, realising he left the books in his locker. ‘can...you drop by the gymnasium later, I’ll pass them to you.’ • shrugging, you reply, ‘yeah sure, I need to talk to some of my club seniors anyway,’ • ‘thanks! you’re the best!’ • you don’t think anything of it until lunch, after consulting your squad - who screams • ‘why?’ • ‘wOOsEOk asKED yOu tO waTCH hIS PRActIce!’ • ‘....no I’m just getting stuff from him aiya what the heck...’ • ‘no way, Wooseok isn’t like this. Did Eunbin not introduce Seonho to you yesterday?’ • ‘iT MUST BE SEONHO.’ • and that’s how everyone started shipping you two • pls be rational, logical friends • you realise slyWooseok isn’t one of those people when you arrive at the gym • and he dumps a whole pile of books in your arms • you know your arms are bound to break • and the library is on the 4th floor, not in the same block • ‘WOO-‘ • ‘THANK YOU’ he yells, running back to join his team • even though they’re getting a 10 minute break • sighing, you sluggishly stumble out of the gym • ‘here,’ • YOO SEONHO STRIKES • ‘let me help you.’ • AsDFGHJKL • he won’t take your refusals and talks to you along the way • in the end, he smiles at you before bidding you goodbye • AND A NEW CONTACT IN YOUR PHONE • that’s how it started • you found yourself texting Seonho a lot • like • a lot • he was super sweet person to talk to • and often used cute emojis to talk • then if he got mad about something, he would leave you on ‘read’ until 10 minutes later • I’m gonna try and do that ^ • it was such a casual thing when you guys started dating • literally • but your heart was pounding, even hours after he had asked you out • it was right after your final paper • btw, Seonho stayed and studied with you until the library closed when you were cramming • and he also helped you with notes and whatnot • Eunbin and Wooseok even made a bet to see how long it would take for you two to start dating • the cutest tbh • and once he asked you • you said • YES • and then you got to know a lot more people in your grade, older and younger students • how cool • Seonho always gave you his basketball team jacket to wear at games • he was so shy the first time he asked you • it was right after his practice and you were waiting for him near the school gate • he came out of the locker room, trembling hands holding onto his jacket • subtly • ‘h-hey b-babe,’ he stammers • listen • this boy RARELY stutters, he always can find a good excuse or make up something on the spot • you know he’s serious about something • ‘can...c-can you w-wear my jacket to my game this Saturday? if...i-if y-you’re planning to g-go of course!’ he adds quickly, while a blush fills his face • there was no way you were going to pass up the opportunity • and that’s when your relationship was announced to the general public • but who was shocked? • everyone saw it coming • you guys are too cute as a couple to go unnoticed • Seonho is a lowkey sucker for PDA • like the boy will make his relationship KNOWN • it’s the little things that matters • a small peck on the cheek • the way your hand fits in his • sometimes you really want to kiss his forehead but this boy is like a 6’0 giraffe and unless you’re at least 5’11.5 that’s a bit of a struggle • rip me I’m 5’4.5 • I think • he just giggles and bends down so you can kiss him comfortably • or you’re 6’5 and height has never really been a problem • oh, I envy • he will hug you out of nowhere • back hugs • side hugs • front hugs • hugs you and spins you around • collapses into your arms hugs • yes, expect clinginess and extensive skinship • but you love it • you guys don’t argue much unless it’s something roughly related to life or death • you can see the fury in Seonho’s eyes but he just locks himself in a room for a good hour to get the rationality back • maybe that’s the secrets to a good relationship • he doesn’t hold back on the ‘L word’ either • you first said it a good year into the relationship • he said it in a good month • it was the weekend right after his team won a major championship and you took him out for pizza • he said I love you after you promised to pay for the pizza he wanted • but he really means it • dates with him could be quite adventurous and spontaneous • ‘yo, let’s go on a date today.’ • ‘ok. just let me cancel this thing first.’ • it’s either you guys go to the amusement park the time it opens to nightfall • or you go there, take one ride and leave • Seonho could also be the guy who likes cafe dates • not cafe hopping but • you guys could pinpoint a particular place • go there for a couple of dates to try everything you like on the menu • before moving on to another place • on 1 December, Seonho burst into your house and woke you up by singing to Christmas carols • enthusiasts about the holiday • buys matching ugly Christmas sweaters • he tried to DIY ones with you but they weren’t the best • you wear them to sleep though, because don’t waste comfy sweaters • present wise, if you send him a list of things you want/need, he might get all of them just for you • compliments you all the time • but if that shirt is ugly, that shirt is ugly • Seonho tries to teach you how to play ‘Jingle Bells’ on the piano • it involved a lot more hand-holding than you thought • his passion for music is admirable • just watching him immerse himself in the piano can make anyone cry • and the fact that he wants to involve you in something he holds so close to his heart • C R Y ME A RIVER • when it snows, it’s either you two snuggle by the fireplace • or engage in a deathly snowball fight outside • Guanlin and Wooseok joined you guys once • Guanlin nearly had to go to the ER after • Seonho likes to build snowmen with you • only with you • even though it didn’t look like a picture perfect Olaf, he was so proud of it and took a dozen polaroids • all in all, Seonho is a super supportive boyfriend, loves skinship • he can get annoyingly clingy and sometimes sensitive • but you guys always work it out • because love is love • you learn more about Seonho everyday • he will warm up and open up to you, don’t worry • you love him • like c’mon, he helped you decorate a whole ass Christmas tree then let you put the star on top • this is marriage • happy holidays!

[terkaznebes]

One month to go – countdown

Last month in my twenties. Does it change anything? No. Does it matter? Yes. Why? I don’t know. Maybe because I have this idea that a girl will have most definitely disappeared into a women. It probably happened a long time ago. And just because I still don’t know what I am doing, does not mean it hasn’t already happened.

It’s also a potential marker, where you thought you’d be by this time and what you’d have accomplished. Not according to anyone else, but according your teenage diary.

Let’s do a small recap. Coming from a more mature person on Forbes.com, who unlike me is at peace with leaving the decade behind.

Things that you should have done in your twenties:

Start taking care of yourself.

Yep, a big check for that one. I think the last time I was being stupid eating like pig and not paying attention to sports was left behind sometimes in the year 2010. And when I look at the photos from 2009, I think I looked better in the 9th month of pregnancy. If you are not going to take care of yourself who will? It’s the best investment. Skin, body, mind. Buy that oil, book the yoga class, go for that run, take the time to journal, cook for yourself. Forget about packaged foods and then it’s ok to drink the gin every now and then.

Allowing yourself to feel lost.

Boy I wish I did that. Unfortunately I was always a girl with a plan. I am just really thanking my former self that once the plan was: to travel, take great photos, hike the mountains, see the carnival, taste the local beer in every country. I think this is as close to being lost as I have come to. If anything I am more lost as a parent than as was in my early twenties.

Dreams require sacrifice. 

Apparently I should have learned that dreams require sacrifice. I would sacrifice a young virgin if I knew what my dreams were. I should have figured out my purpose in my twenties, but I guess it will have to be the thirties or the forties, but please let me find out before I am fifty.

Stop caring what people think.

Most likely they are not thinking about you anyway. This is a tough one. I think I have gone through periods in life where I was so high (metaphorically), I couldn’t care less what others thought, but I also voiced some opinions so stupid that my present self is judging my former self. Ultimately I never stopped caring what others thought. Especially the “others’’ that don’t really think anything at all. I did do some solid, solid work in this area in the last two years. Especially because I struggled to write about and share anything parenthood related, except for some cute photos. Even when writing used to be my favourite thing in the world. This was purely because that none of my high school or university friends have kids yet and I just didn’t want to be “the mother”. It took me a while to realise that it’s ok to share whatever feels right. I still care what people think, but at least I don’t let it define or change what I do. Well mostly.

Embrace failure.

No. I don’t think I ever will. J.K.Rowling might have been on welfare once, but she has loads more talent than I do soooo… I guess my move to Italy was a bit of a fail, but the result was such a success, so I am not keen to count that as a failure. Maybe that’s something I might have to experience in this decade then, after I figure out the purpose, then I will sacrifice something, possibly fail before I succeed, it just sounds a lot more daunting when you’ve had family.

Don’t compare yourself to others.

I wish I worked on this throughout my twenties. I don’t just compare myself to others, I would compare to someone who is the most amazing mother when it comes to motherly things. I will compare my career and the money I make to single girls living in the capitals of Europe, my yoga skills to someone for whom it’s a full time job and who’s gone to gymnastics since the age of five, my looks to girls of Instagram and happiness to online gurus and coaches. In the end it all comes down to one thing only: Are you happy?

Don’t make excuses, apologise.

Yep. I know when to admit I was wrong. Check for this one.

Things don’t workout for a reason.

But sometimes the reason is that you are an idiot.

Invest in experiences, not things.

From the bottom of my heart, I can sincerely say this was my motto throughout my twenties. Apart from my Fiat500, I have spent all my money on travels, gym, food, good wine and just enjoying life. Before landing the love of my life, I had nothing because the very last money I have saved, I have spent on moving all of my things back from Italy, visa and a one way ticket to the land down under. It’s good that it only took me a week to find a job. Only towards the late twenties, I have started to invest some of the hard earned cash on things like architectural studies for our future home. Looking forward to that btw.

Start saving money ASAP.

Well I always did, but then I went on holidays. No regrets, you can always make money, but I probably won’t backpack through Bolivia again.

Your friends will change.

It’s true. You are not meant to spend a lifetime with everyone, some people just come to enrich part of your life and then they disappear. Hurting your arms trying to hold on to them is not worth it. Then there are the kind of friend who used to come to your home after school to take afternoon naps in your single bed. Those are here to stay.

Time is your most precious resource.

As a person who rarely does something she really doesn’t want to, I have been aware of this eternal truth since I was a kid.

Know you are enough.

Ok I am sorry but Frances Bridges what a load of bullshit you wrote in this paragraph: as long as you know you are on the right path to realise your potential and your dreams, you know you are enough? How the fuck are you supposed to know that? So you are enough only when you are doing all the right things? No you are enough just when you are trying to be a kind person. That’s all. 

Love yourself.

Ok, I do. Even as a thirty year old, which let’s be honest is probably a tiny bit better than me at the age of twenty.

One thing I wish I knew a little bit earlier: from one day to another rollercoaster will no longer be fun, but they will just make you sick, at least I would have enjoyed that last ride. 

[chrisstevenson]

Are Debut Authors Getting Publishing Deals?

I found this question in a thread in one of my writing groups. (I love this group--they really hit on the pertinent subjects). There were a lot of answers, but I noticed that the majority of them answered by saying that there were big six and seven-figure deals that had currently been made, and they cited the names of the authors. I think I saw a total of three. Obviously, these posters and the OP were thinking about the Big-5 houses since you rarely see any advances in the small and independent presses. I know that my agent has had to go after my small press deals with a knife in one hand and a money bag in the other. Most small presses won't bend for an advance, but some will, depending upon how badly they want your book. If the agent doesn't get the amount they're looking for they usually write-in much higher royalty rates and retain more rights. My agent is a magician when it comes to amending or rewriting contracts in our favor.

I only have the free addition of Publisher's Market Place, which does list recent deals, and some of them include debut authors. Yet I continually see the deals announced as "New Your Times Best Seller List" and "USA Best-Selling Author" inks deal with so and so for this much, repped by big-name agent. I do not see that many debut deals announced. I sure haven't seen tons in the past three years or so, or especially recently in the past six months as a result of this pandemic. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, and the posters were correct in answering in the positive. But I know for sure it's happening less and less.

This was my answer:

I just know that all my small press and independent publishers are suffering. Many authors are without sales or reviews--they're not even on the boards. Myself and a few others are doing better but we're in poor shape compared to what we used to do. Really poor shape. Yet I will support my small press publishers with my last dying breath. Their task is a labor of love, with a wish that they can stay alive and profitable so they can bring new talent and great books to the masses.

I still believe the Big-5 are ambulance chasers when they seek out and buy debut authors. Wool, Twilight, 50 Shades had huge appeal and readers before the big houses woke up and smelt the coffee. New authors might be grabbing the golden tickets, but you have to admit that they are far, few and in between. More than ever, I'm researching these huge author deals and discovering the histories of these authors and these books. In one form or another, they have appeal with some kind of track record or platform behind them. Suzy ala The Hunger Games, was already connected up in the industry before she hit it big--and yes, admittedly a great book/series. Look at the story behind The Martian. It's not the editors or CEO of the publishing house who determines a purchase. It's the marketing department, and they nearly, singularly run the entire show. The exception would be a totally breakout novel sold by an A-list agent, where the author had no credits, no fan base, virtually no footprint or platform in the industry. A book that gets six and seven figure deals without that type of support is an extreme outlier. Or all the galaxies are inline in their favor! My agent is having difficulty getting responses from the Big 5, and it's been one of her, and her fellow agents, biggest complaints. A-list and celebrity authors are dominating and filling the slots, especially with on-going series that seem to have no end. Those are marketing department decisions--strictly business. Admittedly, there are a hell of a lot of goofs with lofty advances and tepid sales, but the vast majority of the "in-house" best-sellers keep the lights on. Again, marketing. Again, business. Which  =  math and numbers, sell-through, production costs, advertising and distribution.

These debut block-busting authors MUST appeal in some way (other than a great tome)--they have something else going for them, because the authors themselves are a selling point. That's why name branding is so important. Age, gender, race, religion, topical/political stance and such things, all play into the package. Case in point--Eragon. Heavens! Christopher was More marketable than the book! If that book had NO campaign (launched by the help of his parents BTW) do you think that book would have ever had a chance or gotten the deal that it did? Marketing saw that one coming like a freight train. Kid writes epic fantasy, dresses up the part and visits schools to do readings! The AP wires caught on fire. Marketing (of big name publishing house) realized that half of their job had already been done. It was only necessary to shove the kid and his book to the moon--he was already in the stratosphere. The (cited) article mentions an uptick in reading and increased sales. Oh yeah? Maybe for Random House, and maybe for certain categories and genres, but how about a huge poll that involves all other publishers great and small? Lets include all trad publishers other than the monsters and see how they stand on that issue. She (CEO Random House) says that people are tiring of Netflix and resorting to books, whereas I see the opposite across the wider spectrum. Huge movie and game-streaming. Are people really reading more now? Not to be a Danny Downer here; just saying that there is so, so much more in bringing a book to break-out/best-seller status than just exceptional words on a page. Whenever I hear the old adage, "Write a great book that everyone will want to read and it will sell", I cringe. And I believe  this forum knows what I'm talking about more than any other. Our true masterpieces, our hard-gained brilliance, even, has been squashed so many times it's a wonder we haven't all had massive strokes from elevated blood pressure. When they say that this business is 99.999% rejection, they had us in mind.

That was my contribution to the discussion. That was my take on what I was seeing. I really hadn't said anything new.

Slots are also filled seasonally. Although there are no strict adherence guidelines, you can just about guess which season a debut author who writes like King or Cartland might end up in.

Fall: August or September through November. Winter: December through March. Spring/Summer: April through July or August.

Liz S, Editor-in-Chief at Feiwel and Friends/Macmillan, states:

"The Obvious (with a few caveats): This is all about promotional opportunities surrounding holidays and other special events. Books about Back to School and Halloween should pub in the Fall season, right? Not so fast – most retailers want those books to ship in July, so they’re in stock for promotions that now begin in August (school) and September (Halloween). Books about Christmas can pub in the Fall months, but no later than October so they are in-store and on promotion early in the season. Black History Month and Presidents Day should pub no later than December (Winter season); ditto Valentine’s Day."

There is also the difficulty in pushing a new/debut author into and under the limelight. Whereas a standard brand-name author has a solid fan base already installed, a newbie is going to need a publicity campaign bordering on the size of a presidential election. This can make the PR people run for the Tums and anti-depressant meds.It is no small task: literally making somebody out of nobody. I know that for my first major TV appearances, I had to be groomed, tailored and tutored by a Disney PR person, no less.  

So is there any wonder why there are not as many debut authors as we'd like to think? The ones we see are huge media grabbers, and they are meant to appear that way. And just between you and me, nearly all claims of these huge dollar figure advances are over-inflated or outright bogus. The true declarations will pan out--read about King, Rowling and Rice for some accurate advances and deals.  

So how do you up your chances to become one of the elite authors who make the big time? A couple of suggestions: if you are a self-published author, write terrific books and develop a huge fan base. Get viral. The ambulance chasers will come skidding up to your door. For the traditional or "legacy" route, get yourself a top-gun agent that has more pull than a locomotive. It doesn't hurt if your galaxies are aligned, either.

Red-shifting outta here...