#but it doesn't actually treat anyone's death as a joke

[lecoindecachou]

Honestly one of the best things about OMITB is how much compassion it always has for its victims.

[suiana]

this is inspired by inês and pedro from portugese history or smth BUT imagine being a servant to some noble princess and she marries your future yandere! king who falls for you instead of his wife.

you're loyal to your princess and don't reciprocate his feelings obviously. also, you're just a mere servant, not even of any noble blood. you can't dare to imagine being with a king. that doesn't stop the man from wanting you all to himself though.

he's never felt anything like this before. like yes, he's seen beautiful peolple but it doesn't even match up to the feelings that stir inside him when he as much as thinks about you. everything he feels makes him feel like a pre-pubescent boy that wants you carnally. it's a bit embarrassing. he's the king of a kingdom after all. always calm, always composed, never rash or impulsive. not like this.

but you're perfect.

he must have you. he's worked so hard, surely he deserves some compensation in the form of someone he really adores. so what if he has a wife? it was just an arranged marriage anyway. he bets his wife doesn't even like him and has a secret lover somewhere else.

you're the one he wants. not this random princess.

so he pursues you, wanting nothing more than for you to love him back. to love him and only him. all his council men and advisors tell him not to do it. that it's not wise to go after his wife's servant, some no name commoner. he doesn't care.

unfortunately for you, you succumbed to his advances. fortunately for him, you began to show him the love he so desperately craved.

and thus began your not-so-secret relationship. it was... quite wonderful, actually. he was an amazing lover. he treated you to the finest delicacies and spoiled you rotten. he truly only ever wanted the best for you and it showed in his actions. so much so that everyone was aware of how fond he was over you. even the queen (your princess) was supportive of your relationship with him.

however, all good times have to come to an end.

as expected, his parents weren't happy with your relationship with their son. are you serious? this random ahhh commoner is the one their son loves?? no way. this does not match their agenda.

you were charged with treason and sentenced to death not long after. your beloved king couldn't even do anything about it because he was in another kingdom attending to important affairs. truly the most despicable of parents.

you were set to be executed on the gulliotine in the middle of the kingdom. public humilation, is it? you made your way to your death bed, staring at the masses of people who commented about how pitiful you were. alas was the fate of an unlucky commoner.

"thank you, my love."

and you shut your eyes, never to open them ever again as the blade came falling down on your neck.

"stop!"

it was too late. the blade had already sliced your head off your body, blood pooling on the ground as your lifeless body remain limp on the gulliotine.

all was quite, except the laboured breaths of the kingdom's king as he shakily made his way over to your head. his hands were cold, eyes wide open in horror as he mutters to himself as though it would comfort him.

"no, no, no... hey, this is just a joke right? this..."

everyone in the area could only stare silently as their king silently wept over your death. his once pristine white garments now stained red as he cradles your head in his arms.

"why? why you? anyone but you..."

who knew that your death would be witnessed by your lover too? that your death day would coincide with his homecoming?

and just as fast as his despair and sadness came, so did rage.

all was calm except for the screams of his parents as his sword plunged deep into their chests. his face was dark, jaw tight as he gave a mere glance back at the crowd.

"kill everyone. make sure no one leaves alive."

at his order, all hell broke loose. where was the calm and benevolent king they knew?!

screams of pain and agony, cries for mercy... the crowd could only watch as their king stood beside your body. there wasn't a hint of remorse in his face. in fact, they couldn't read what he was even feeling. all they could see was the face of a man who was utterly crushed and desperate for his lover.

...

a few days after his massacre, he had divorced his ex wife and crowned you as his new spouse. he had carefully sown your head back onto your body, not wanting anyone else to touch what was his.

"you're beautiful, my darling."

he kisses your cold lips, helping you get dressed in your coronation outfit. his hands were soft, gentle as they always were with you. he wouldn't let anyone touch you. no, they didn't deserve to touch you. only he did.

he gently carried your body out to the grand hall, not caring about the terrified glances and looks from his advisors and the royal court. right, he had also brutally murdered anyone related to your death. the executioner, the advisors who agreed to your execution... no longer was he the benevolent king he was once known as but a mad dog.

"bow down to your new ruler."

he'll make sure you get recognised as what you were supposed to be recognised as.

how dare they try and kill you like you weren't his one and only? how dare they think so little of you and get rid of you when he wasn't in the country? that is a royal crime. not only are they looking down on you, but on him as well.

"from now on, you will listen to every demand and word that my spouse says."

if the air around the ballroom wasn't so thick, it might have come out as a joke. after all, you were dead. how were you to talk every again?

"welcome our new ruler."

that wasn't a question. it was a demand.

your king will make sure you get the love and respect you deserve. and who knows, maybe he'll get you back with how dedicated he is. he knows a thing or two about dark magic, perhaps the next thing he'll do is bring you back to life.

yes, that is a good idea. that way you and him can truly be together once again.

[littlepuddingsworld]

Alien stage?? I've heard of it... seems mid... 🙄😒

(PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ITS SO FIRE I SWEAR)

It is good tho, if you don't wanna write it at the end of the day then oh well. However!! If you do write something, i will literally worship you /j /t /all jokes aside, any works are welcome with open arms, just make sure to take care of yourself and be careful on not accidentally overwhelming yourself <33

-panna cotta

𝔐𝔜 𝔖𝔄𝔙ℑ𝔒𝔘ℜ

you are actually so right about everything just... ugh😔😔😔 im okay!!! boo,,,, <3333 im just trying to make that my new hyperfix and coquette up my new bloggie a little, since i don't know how to do aesthetic right at least cheesie bot with me again</3 they ignored my blogs so long uh-huh so its a lucky sight<3 but like!!! i still can't let go of the idea of Luka. I love Ivan, don't get me wrong, but Luka is such a diva.

♡ unhealthy relationship, childhood traumas, bad socialization, mild harassment (probably?), drabble

just imagine that this is a closed weird-ish (unique) child whom you have known since childhood, constantly carrying with you because this is the only one who did not have clique with anyone, and at first he kind of resists, but over time just lets you, even looking for you on his own when there is such an opportunity, because the schedule of study in the garden is very loaded - singing, learning to comprehend death, philosophical teachings about accepting death, singing, gymnastics, singing, eating, studying, individual programs - but you still look for each other when it's time to walk-

always.

indoors, in a closed society in which everyone has been with each other for several years, with an ever-decreasing number of "unsuccessful students" and without the opportunity to get to know each other properly, everyone clings to each other like oxygen, especially when studying becomes more and more stressful, but you always find each other in the dining room in the classroom, in the garden - soon everyone in the garden knows that you are close, even if LUKA sometimes keeps especially aloof when you are in the garden among the flowers, but you don't mind knowing his personality. you're just glad you have him.

a friend.

in an atmosphere in which a little more and you will go crazy, in an atmosphere of isolation and pressure, when you awkwardly grab each other's sleeves, trying to say that you are friends, not even really knowing how to be friends or communicate, since aliens have never treated you the way you want to be treated, to have a cold, submissive, soft, but such a living and breathing LUKA is like having something soft and delicate on your hands, like red flowers, but if the flower is red, then LUKA... LUKA is like the sun.

it's cold, but sometimes it's warm, even if you know it's unrealistic; it's so soft and gentle, even though you can't reach it with your hand. you can reach LUKA with your hand - he does not even resist, on the contrary, he sits closer to you with his sleeve in his mouth.

so silly.

but yours.

huddle closer, like red flowers, trying not to get warm, not to hide, finally closing our eyes, knowing that even closing our eyes, nothing will disappear - but for the first time you are happy about it, feeling the body next to you, so soft and obedient, breathing. even if LUKA doesn't like running, he prefers hide-and-seek, you agree to sit with him. aliens, you're even ready to hide from the whole world during his favorite game, and you're ready to show up if it means they won't realize that LUKE was hiding with you and won't go check this place again! and you're ready to give him food, and you hate seeing him so mildly vulnerable, like even a badly fallen branch (but you know they never fall!) could kill him. LUKE is soft, so gentle, so delicate that when he doesn't move for a long time, you can't help but be afraid that something has happened to him.

LUKA doesn't mind. on the contrary, he hates it when you leave without him, when you have fun without him, when you are with others without him - but you don't mind - is it strange? he has no one but you... and perhaps two more children - and rather encourage him to cling if he feels good. after all, isn't this normal? Who will teach you what is "normal"? LUKA is older and understands this better - he looks up with his eyes, drooling on his sleeve, and you just gently snuggle closer to him so as not to disturb him. he is so gentle and small, even if he is taller than you - when did he become like this? he was always so little...

you do not notice at what point you are really inseparable. his hand is in your hand, he is hanging on you, you are almost wearing him, his shoulder is in your shoulder, he is on your chest, you are on his chest, lying together under a tree, lying with your head on each other's shoulder, cuddling, cuddling another, putting your head on your head - over time, personal space becomes more less and less, both in quantity and in time. he's got his heartbeat under your fingers, your own beating to the beat. LUKA looks at you with his eyes, and although there are no tears in them, you still kiss him on the forehead. it's so disgusting that you can't do anything. it's so frustrating that he doesn't even fight, and even though you realize that it's impossible for you to fight, not in this atmosphere and society, he's like a rag.

... it's so weird when he keeps snuggling up to you - and you to him so you're probably no better - even as you get older. he already looks different, children's cheeks and fat disappear, exposing chiseled elegant features full of some gentle sadness of a luxurious but little-lived butterfly, mixed with longing for something long lost and forgotten, and... sun. some kind of sunstone. there is less of that gentle, childlike softness in him, more like fresh milk, - and more of that silent severity, even sharpness. his face changes, he stretches out, his gaze is no longer the same, he no longer drools, does not look into the distance with the same face, does not cling to you like a lost chick, does not look like someone abandoned and unable to survive on his own, the name of which is spinning in your head, but you can't tell, when he puts his head on your chest, but now it doesn't feel like that. it's still your LUKA, but not your LUKA, and you don't know how to explain it to him, especially when he's still looking up from the bottom, as if thinking about something, but now it seems so... strange and distant.

you are not uncomfortable with his touch or proximity, but seeing him like this seems unfamiliar. his gaze changes, his body changes, he is silent with a completely different meaning, and you realize that he has been through too much - now you are old enough to understand this - but you still do not know what you can say or do. you can no longer protect him, give him a portion, hide him in your hands, promise to always be together, kiss him on the forehead, hide behind bushes so that no one finds you while you huddle together as if for the last time - none of this will work.

and you get even more disgusted - from yourself, from the situation, from him - when he tells you "don't worry. I will protect you. I guarantee your safety." with a direct eye-to-eye look because you don't want protection - you want time back, hiding in the bushes and wet spots on you or on his sleeve from saliva. you want to lie under the trees again, tell him about your day, draw and laugh.

you don't want that.

... you only get the point when you watch some person die on stage, but LUKA doesn't look affected, scared, or shocked.

he's the best of his kind - you know that yourself, everyone know it - but it all looks funny and ridiculous when you don't just see strangers dying, but you see your LUKA on that stage.

and you are disgusted and ashamed that the only thing you are happy about is that you are not this dead man on stage and that you are not LUKA's opponent. because you know that no one has a chance.

... well, almost no one.

HYUNA has been special since childhood, and if you could not expect such a performance from LUKA, then you expect everything from her.

[pyrrhiccomedy]

a collection of thoughts about Veilguard

it's pretty good! it's a fun, straightforward adventure story where you play the good guys, the bad guys are bad guys, and there's one morally ambiguous character but don't get scared, you have the whole game to decide what to do with him. the combat is fun, the cast is likable, and the world is pretty. if you like fantasy rpgs, you will probably like this one!

I said the cast is likeable. I didn't say they were interesting. everyone kinda comes off like they've been to therapy for at least six months, and have put in some effort to "do the work." Your party's character flaws are things like "people pleaser" or "rude (but still well-intentioned)" or "justifiably cynical." These are all more or less functional and mature adults who want to get along and experience very few obstacles to doing so.

The obstacles they do experience to getting along are pretty flimsy, and are sometimes resolved in under a minute.

Le wokisme is a problem with the factions, which is a problem with the game, because the game revolves around the factions. None of the factions are allowed to be - again - morally ambiguous. There's a faction of treasure hunters, but don't worry, they have experts to make sure they don't sell anything important to anyone's culture. There's a faction of assassins which in a previous game have been shown to be harsh mercenaries who traffic in slavery in order to acquire children to raise into professional killers, but don't worry, they've mellowed out a lot since then, and now they ~don't kill innocent people~ and all of the members are excited to be there. There's a faction of death-worshipping necromancers, but don't worry: they're pretty much treated as a joke faction, and they don't do anything darker than raising some friendly skeletons to do custodial work.

A lot of the game takes place in the Tevinter Imperium, which we know from previous games to be a racist imperial power built upon the labor of a mostly-elven slave force. I say we know that 'from previous games' because it really doesn't come up in this game. The Tevinter faction is a group of slave abolitionists, but you don't actually help them free any slaves. In fact, you never even meet any slaves. In fact, you never even see any slaves. In Minrathous, the capitol city of the slave empire.

We also never see any anti-elf racism, in Minrathous or anywhere else, or meet any elves anywhere who have much of anything negative to say about the current world state. I think it would have been interesting to engage with why some elves might actually support the Morally Ambiguous Guy Who Is Looking To Tear Down The Current World Order In Order To Restore The Elves To Their Bygone Glory, but then your protagonists might have been placed into an ethically dubious situation at some point, by opposing a guy, who is, among some more alarming intentions - let me be so clear - trying to free the elven slaves. And god forbid we make the player uncomfortable!

There are no titties in this game. You do fuck your love interest on the eve of the final battle, as is traditional, but there will be nary a titty in sight. That, like ethical conundrums or moral ambiguity, is evidently too grown-up for the target Veilguard audience.

Whoever it was on the writing team who was interested in the Qunari has either left the team, or is no longer interested in the Qunari. They are a non-presence, and the Big Grey Guys With Horns who you fight are just violent assholes who don't follow the Qun. They've also been redesigned again. They basically just look like tieflings, with even more awkward foreheads. RIP to a genuinely original fantasy race. We'll always have Sten and the DA2 Arishok.

Fans of previous games will, however, be pleased at how generous the writers have been with answering outstanding questions! You will learn what the titans were, what happened to them, what the Blight is, what caused the Blight, what the Golden/Black City is, why breaching it unleashed the Blight, who the Tevinter old gods were, what the deal was with the elven gods, and (not that anyone was in doubt of this after Inquisition anyway) that the Maker is fake for sure for sure.

Every religion in Thedas is proved to be fake by the end of the game, though, so it feels a bit less like "kids raised evangelical stick it to Big Church" this time.

Morrigan is back! Isabela is back! Dorian is back! Welcome visitations.

People are being shitty about there being an explicitly non-binary character. Fuck those people obviously, but I do wish they'd found something better to call this character than "non-binary," such a modern term that it slingshot me out of my fantasy world full of dragons and magic into a corporate diversity and inclusion training module.

Being a mage doesn't matter anymore. Sorry if you were hoping it might, but honestly that's on you. If they chickened out of doing anything with the mage conflict set up in DA:O and DA2 in Inquisition, I don't know why you expected they'd find a renewed interest in engaging with it now.

You can't be a blood mage. You can't actually do anything evil. Your PC is a Hero. I don't have a problem with this, exactly, but it contributes to the feeling of the series having moved to the kiddy end of the pool over the years.

Overall, I think this is almost surely going to be the last Dragon Age game, and I think that's almost definitely a good thing. It's a fun send-off that takes you on a whistle-stop tour of nearly all the places left in Thedas you haven't seen yet, ties up nearly all of the loose ends, and lets you hit an ogre with a warhammer so hard that he goes flying like he's full of packing peanuts.

Time enjoyably, but not meaningfully, spent.

[trappedinafantasy37]

Since Minthara presents an exterior shell made of steel, and she's sometimes mean, and is an absolute badass in battle, she is often treated and perceived as someone who feels no emotions. And this often occurs to individuals who do put on such a tough exterior. It also does not help that many people perceive evil characters as incapable of doing or feeling anything other than evil. That love and evil are innately incompatible.

But Minthara is not emotionless, she does feel things. Sadness, grief, fear, loneliness, anger, anxiety, paranoia, vengeance, love. She can laugh, she can tell jokes, she can cry, she can smile, and she does get upset at things. If anything, she is emotionally repressed and emotionally guarded and the times where she does really express her more negative and vulnerable emotions is when it becomes too much to hold back and it comes out a little over the top. We have to remember she comes from a society in which such outward emotional expression would be rewarded with social punishment, religious scorn, or even death. So she really doesn't have the healthiest mechanisms to express her emotions.

She hides what she feels all the time as a means of keeping herself safe from punishment. She keeps it to herself cause she does not want you to see her as weak, as she would have been in the past. And she certainly does not want you or anyone else to punish her for it either. She hides behind little pet names and even using words from languages she knows you don't understand as that is the only way she feels safe being vulnerable with you. In her past, her love was rewarded with new wounds and new scars. She is terrified to open up to you, fearing that you will hurt her because she loves you. That her love for you won't actually be enough to stop you from hurting her. And she will only ever admit she loves you in contexts that have a high risk of death because there's really not much for her to lose at that point so she may as well tell you.

She also has a habit of intellectualizing what she feels and experiences so that they appear as "rational" and "logical" rather than emotional and to distance herself from her emotions. She says it takes a sharp mind to have sympathy for someone who suffers unnecessarily. She is trying to make it appear that emotions like sympathy is a matter of the mind, not the heart. That it is a mark of intelligence, because otherwise it would be the mark of weakness.

She blames herself for her own torments, like she deserved the awful things that happened to her. She frames the situation like she is more at fault and more deserving of blame, than the people who hurt her. It is the only way she can find any reason in what happened to her and any reason in her tormentors actions. That she did something wrong and induced someone's wrath upon her, rather than acknowledging that the person who hurt her is just a bad person.

She deserved what Ketheric and Orin did to her because she was "weak, passive, proud". That her emotional state had blinded her from the trap that was set, giving Ketheric and Orin ample opportunity to attack her. That if she hadn't felt those exact emotions, then it wouldn't have happened. She could have seen the trap coming, or she could have fought back.

Or if you attempt to tell her that her childhood was rough and her mother abused her, she immediately deflects by saying, "it could have been worse" and therefore, what she did actually experience wasn't really that bad. And yeah, sure, maybe she needed certain lessons given that she lived in a cruel and dangerous society like Menzoberranzan where she had to be prepared for violence at all times. But trauma is not born of love, it is born of fear, of pain, of agony, and her mother still tried to kill her. Regardless of her mother's intent, it was the first broken bond of trust and it left a mark on Minthara. Where she began to believe that her mother would torment her for torments sake, and she had doubts on whether or not her mother actually loved her.

When you encounter the first Orin imposter, it's pretty damn obvious she is terrified. And you kinda gotta squeeze it out of her to admit that she's afraid. Where it's "I'm afraid of Orin because she is capable of this, this, and this, and you should be too" rather than "I am afraid of Orin because she hurt me." And she begs you, BEGS, to keep her safe because she knows her fear makes her vulnerable to Orin.

She doesn't even truly acknowledge that she wasn't at fault for what Orin did to her until Orin is dead. She doesn't start putting the blame on Orin until Orin is dead. She doesn't go through the emotional process of sympathizing with herself until Orin is dead. And she doesn't admit that she undoubtedly has trauma, until Orin is dead. She gets so wrapped up, and so lost in her own fear and paranoia that she never has the room to properly process the things that happen to her. That her primary concern right now is keeping you, the others, and herself safe and her emotions can wait because wallowing in them will only make her weak. Only does the distance of death give her the room to start healing. Only problem is that there have always been threats and they never end, they never stop. So it is rare for Minthara to ever have a moment of peace and safety to work through what she feels and they just get backed up. Ignoring your problems does not make them go away.

So you wanna know what will happen when an embrace Durge betrays her? She will fall to her death, a knife in her belly, blaming herself for your betrayal. All her worst fears have come to pass and you were indeed a lover who hurt her because she loved you, and that she was a fool to ever trust you at all. That if she didn't love you, maybe you wouldn't have hurt her. She doesn't understand your reasoning, she can't make sense of it, she doesn't know why you'd betray her, so it must have been her fault for thinking you'd be different. That if she hadn't been so loyal, so devoted, that she could have been spared. That her belief that you would rule together is what damned her. She will die blaming herself for her own murder before she ever gets a chance to start blaming you.

[obitos-whore]

The Akatsuki members as your boyfriend/girlfriend

I'll be brutally honest here and won't sugarcoat things.

TW: toxic relationships, mention of manipulation, stalking and death threats, mention of sex, criminals trying to encourage you to commit theft and murder (y'know, the usual Akatsuki shenanigans)

18+, Minors do not interact!

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Pain/Nagato

• Due to him being the leader of Amegakure and the Akatsuki (and a God), he's busy most of the time. But that doesn't mean he's unaware of the things you're up to

• He uses his rain to track your every move whenever you're out and about in the village and tasks Konan with keeping watch over you. And in case she is away on a mission, he will use one of the other Pains' to make sure you "Stay out of trouble"

• Despite his usually cold and distant demeanor, he can be surprisingly attentive and even affectionate. Not overly of course, but every once in a while, a small remnant of the old Nagato shines through

• Not that big on pet names and actually prefers calling you by your real name. Might relent and call you something like "Treasure" or "Little one"

Konan

• Very sweet and caring girlfriend who tends to be a bit overprotective (can't blame her though *cough* Yahiko *cough*)

• Can be quite possessive too and, although she does give you a lot of freedom, uses her mere presence to intimidate anyone who even thinks of trying to woo, or worse, harm you

• Only you are blessed to see her attentive and loving side. But the thing is: Konan, being a victim of many losses throughout her life, also tends to love bomb you every chance she gets. Means her affection can sometimes be suffocating, even if she genuinely means well

• "Honey", "Sweetie", and "Gorgeous" are her top three favourite pet names for you

Itachi

• One of the few Akatsuki members who actually treats you right and doesn't throw insults at you, threatens to kill you, manipulates you or straight up ignores you

• Attentive and caring. He'll notice and remember the smallest things about you and will try to surprise you with your favourite things as much as he can

• You, along with Sasuke, are his top priority

• Calls you "Dear" and "Love"

• Only calls you by your pet name when the two of you are alone. Not out of embarrassment, but calling you by your pet name is something intimate to him and he'd like to keep such things private

Kisame

• Like Itachi, Kisame is one of the few who treats his partner with respect and sees them as equals and not some annoying baggage that he somehow ended up carrying with him and can do with as he pleases

• Considering his strength, enormous size and past, he's surprisingly gentle with his significant other. Both physically and emotionally, although he will be blunt if something bothers him

• Pretty chill dude who literally never gets jealous and lets you do whatever you want and hang out with whoever you want. Not because he doesn't care, but because he actually got some healthy self-esteem and also has faith in your abilities

• Likes to call you "Shortie" and "Smartass" when he feels mischievous and "Sugar" when he's being genuinely affectionate

Tobi/Obito

• Actually very possessive of you (but in subtle, almost "innocent" way) and makes sure you never stray out of his sight, or, Jashin forbid, get 'too comfy' with others

• He's as shameless as he is chaotic and will flirt with you and even make some inappropriate jokes in front of everyone just to see you get embarrassed and blush

• Teases you a lot in a playful way and always makes up for it by giving you lots and lots of cuddles afterwards

• Whenever he doesn't get his way, he will manipulate and guilt trip you by whining and fake sobbing while making himself look like a kicked puppy until you give in to his demands

• His pet names for you are "Dearie" and "Sweetheart"

Sasori

• If there's even a smidge of humanity left in him, you're definitely the only one who gets to see it

• He understands the concept of love and physical affection. But since he's a literal puppet, he doesn't need either of those. Lucky for you though, he will at least try to meet your physical and emotional needs. Don't expect too much though

• While Sasori is usually good with words and knows how to get his message across flawlessly most of the time, he sometimes says the weirdest and most unsettling shit that he perceives as a genuine compliment, but others find... strange. On several occasions, Sasori has complimented your appearance, comparing it to a true work of art, while in the same sentence expressing his desire to preserve that beauty by turning you into a puppet

• Don't even try your luck with asking him to be intimate with you. The answer will always be a firm "No"

• Doesn't bother with cutesy names and will just call you by your real name. Although, if he feels like it, he'll be calling you "Darling"

Deidara

• Deidara, as we all know, is quite impulsive and often lets his frustrations out on you, either by lashing out on you verbally, or during sex. Though he definitely prefers the latter

• He has a sketchbook full of drawings of you which he's too embarrassed of to admit its existence to you

• Just like Tobi, he's pretty shameless when it comes to flirting with you when others are around. Loves to make sexual jokes and comments and if you wear something he really likes, he'll make sure that everyone knows his honest opinion about it

• "Beautiful" and "Babe" are his go to pet names for you

Hidan

• This man is a walking red flag and dull as a rock when it comes to romance and feelings (and the fact that he's a sadistic psychopath doesn't really help here)

• Doesn't care about anniversaries, mainly because he forgets them. But he's also not big on things like cuddling or hand holding

• Threatens to sacrifice you to Jashin quite regularly whenever he's annoyed by something you did or said

• He's by far the worst when it comes to decency, because that's one of the many things he lacks. When he's horny, the entirety of the Akatsuki will know about it. Whether it be with his inappropriate comments and suggestive choice of words, or the fact that he's raw dogging you somewhere less private

• Doesn't really care much about pet names. When he feels like calling you something 'sweet', it'll be something like "Doll", "Babe" or "Cunt"

Kakuzu

• That old cheapskate doesn't even remember how he ended up with you, or why he even bothers with keeping you around. To him, you're loud, annoying and worst of all, expensive

• Has threatened to kill you on multiple occasions, yet for some reason, he can't really bring himself to. As annoying and bothersome as you are, there's something about you that makes him want to keep you around (Probably the fact that you're good at roasting Hidan, which he finds even more annoying. Either that, or one of his hearts is defect)

• Will spend as little money on you as humanly possible. You want flowers? Go pluck them off a field or something. You want new clothes, like that new jacket you saw the other day? Just walk into the store and take it. What's stopping you? The law? The shop owner? Screw the law and kill the owner

• Mostly just calls you "Brat" or simply refers to you by your real name

Zetsu

• Nobody knows how Zetsu managed to get a s/o, not even Zetsu himself. But he doesn't really mind and enjoys your company regardless

• He's more the quiet type and rather listens to you rambling about your day and will occasionally respond with a few words to show that he's actually listening and interested

• He startles you quite a lot when he suddenly appears in a wall or right in front of you. He always apologizes for it, but deep down he loves to hear your startled yelps

• Since he's technically two people in one body, they both share the duty of being your boyfriend. With black Zetsu being the more serious but also more distant one, who, when he feels like it, plans dates and puts serious thought into the gifts he gets you. Meanwhile white Zetsu is the laid back one, who cracks jokes (mostly inappropriate ones) all the time and initiates physical contact

• Black Zetsu often just calls you "Little one" or "Little flower", while White Zetsu gets a hella lot more creative than that and would unironically call you things like "Pookie" or "Snuggle-muffin"

[crushedcoffeecups]

rewatching Saiki K got me thinking again

what if his 'inner thoughts'/narration and commentary to the audience, were actually what he was saying to everyone else?

bear with me i swear i have a point

so we've established that Saiki doesn't speak out loud (aside from the couple exceptions, usually when he's caught off guard), he telepathically sends what he wants to say to whoever he wants to say it to, and creates the illusion that his mouth is moving. seems like more work than actually speak but whatever

i think this is quite often treated in headcanon and fanfic that he doesn't talk to anyone at all (obviously write and headcanon however you want to), but i always went under the assumption he does speak, just doesn't initiate conversation. there are definitely times where he's clearly speaking to someone, not just the audience, mainly when talking to his parents, but also definitely sometimes with friends too.

this then presents my headcanon, that whenever he has his witty commentary to the audience while another person is talking to him, he's talking to them too, and just doesn't care

it takes 'oh Saiki's a quiet kid who's secretly harbouring rage and annoyance at everyone around him' to 'Saiki is openly a jerk to everyone and talks about having powers a lot but they all just think he's joking and don't take notice of what he says'

which makes some of his lines a whole lot funnier if you consider he's deadpan saying it to their face

"are you a first grader?"

"wanna throw down, punk?" (one of my favourite lines)

"Girls are as plentiful as the stars in the sky, and equally as out of reach for you"

"so you're basically a fan blade now?"

"there's a harem cliche for you"

"wait... PURGE ME!"

"i know that butt."

"Are you a god?"

"I'd rather fall to my death than go on a date with you"

there's definitely more lines that refer to his powers and some funnier stuff, feel free to add on your favs!

[beanyboobee]

Realised Noe never actually had a childhood. It was always abruptly interrupted.

And that's something he and Vanitas had in common. Vanitas is more noticeable however for obvious reasons.

But Noes fascination with the world doesn't come from the fact thay his teacher sheltered him, but because his teacher [weather we want to admit it or not] actually answered his questions on the world and allowed him to see more of the world than he had seen before.

Noes earliest memory is being found wandering around the human realm by an old couple. And while they loved hom its clear he wasn't Introduced to anyone else during that time, they died and thus that childhood was interrupted. Right after that he was kidnapped and sold on the market- definetly not a childhood there. And then the teacher bought him and even though they were kept on the Manor grounds they were permitted to play with other village children. That might be the most of a childhood Noe had before that was also abruptly intrupted and then ruined with the death of Louis and the other village children, the memory of that time in the Manor is forever tainted with that memory.

Noe is one of my favorite characters simply because we know so little about him and yet so much is implied. Nothing and yet everything is said at once when it comes to him.

His facination with street magic as seen in the manga for a quick joke panel, his endless exploring, his like for sweet treats, may come from more than this idea of a 'sheltered' life we accociate Noe with. Because he didn't have a 'sheltered' life , thats just others around him says and he never corrects them. Because why would he? Those around him have led worse lives than him. Or so he beleives. His carefree attitude and seemingly 'obvious' nature is what leads us the veiwer and those around noe to veiw him as sheltered, When perhaps we should be asking- why doesn't he know this? Simple, he never had the chance to learn. Not because of the sheltered life he led. But because he was constantly thrown between two worlds who couldn't exactly tell him in detail, and even if he asked questions. What would he ask? He was a child who went between an old human couple who didn't know enough about vampires to explain this. Then trafficers who thought he was human so why would they explain this? Till finally to a teacher who would only answer what was asked of him.

This may be where the turning point between Noe and Vanitas began, when Vanitas maybe started to concider Noe someone closer to him. Because they were similar. They both lost their childhood to something out of their control and both were then taken in to a apperantly 'better' life.

Noe breezes past his past because this story is from his perspective but he is writing it abiut the people he has met and not himself. Therefore he doesn't veiw his past as important. Just a footnote whenever it is brought up by others

[konigsblog]

Hi! Can I request Yandere Alejandro and Yandere König with darling who is naive and innocent. The man see her as a goddess/angel.

alejandro, and könig with a darling who is niave/innocent

warnings:, smut, sexual remarks, corruption kink, praise, bodyworship: i do not condone any behaviour i write about, all of this is fiction.

masterlist

könig

definitely views you as a goddess/god. you're everything to him, everything he needs.

because of your innocent personality, sometimes he views you as more fragile and delicate than you actually are.

any sexual remark you make is downplayed or thought as just an accident. he doesn't think you actually know what you're saying, even if you remind him multiple times that you are an adult and know what sex is.

when he first had sex with you, he was so nervous. he didn't want to make you uncomfortable or scared after he built up this relationship.

"mausi, are you sure you want this?" he'd ask, multiple times. watching your facial expressions for any sign of discomfort.

if one day, you do decide to say something sexual, he wouldn't think anything of it. you're sat on his lap, slightly grinding against him? maybe you're not comfortable where you're sat, sit on his other thigh!

or if a sex scene came on while watching tv, he'd watch your fave the entire time, confused on how you're not gagging.

könig honestly doesn't understand, you don't find sex gross? but you're so innocent, surely you do?

when speaking to others, he gives death glares to anyone who says something slightly inappropriate. you're too innocent to hear this, save it for the bedroom.

if he does make a sexual comment, you don't notice it immediately. only when you're sat in bed late at night thinking bad to what he said. königs kissing your neck, he's just playing around! right?

but when you're sat in his sweatshirt, it hangs low to your thighs and you panties are slightly showing while you're sat down, he can't help himself from lapping at your pussy juices! you can't blame him, can you?

—

alejandro

due to alejandros job, he often worries about your safety. teaching you how to use a gun, hold a knife and throw a decent punch.

he decided to buy a german shepard while hes away.

because of your niave personality, he knows you could get yourself into danger, telling you what's right and wrong as if you're 5 years old again.

you remind him that, “i'm not a kid, don't treat me like one.” but he hears none of it. in his eyes you know nothing.

but, that doesn't mean he doesn't like that. he values your innocence and bows down to you, worshipping you as if you're some type of magical god that could grant him his three wishes.

during sex, he kisses your body, holding you down so you don't squirm.

definitely into bodyworship, wants you to feel like a goddess/god.

if anyone tries to ask you something that he deems as inappropriate, you won't hear from them again. he'll cut contact off with them saying that he doesn't think that they're right for you when you ask.

he praises you anytime, pretty much looks up to you. “amor, i love you, you're everything baby.” alejandro whispered into your thighs.

oh, and any sexual remark you make sounds like a joke to him. not that he's laughing at you, but just confused because it doesn't match how he views you.

he still loves you though, through your innocence and how niave you are.

—

[buddierecs]

angst buddie fics

all of these are general audience, teen and up or not rated (no smut) make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

a leaf falls on loneliness (highly recommend this fic!!) by: iimpossible_things "buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “i’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. really, he doesn’t. the 118 has too many good, kind people for that. but every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to eddie or bobby or hen or chim, he hears eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.” —you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting— so each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence." word count: 11k important tags: hurt/comfort, fluff, happy ending, original male character catharsis by: rogerzsteven "it only takes one minor inconvenience for buck to have his long overdue breakdown" word count: 5.3k important tags: emotional hurt/comfort, mental/emotional breakdown, bobby nash as evan buckley parent, multiple pov still by: brewsrosemilk "for the first time, buck longs for a bullet wound to treat. dirt to dig at. a door to break through. something. there’s nothing. “your guess was correct, diaz,” the bomb technician tells them, as he gestures to the orange circle. “you’re standing on a large sensor plate, wired to a detonator. It’s incredibly important that you don’t move. don’t shift. when you put your weight down, it was like cocking a gun - you take your weight off, this thing is powerful enough to take the entire house with it." word count: 9.3k important tags: near death experience, love confessions, happy ending, first kiss august by: daisies_and_briar "buck, eddie, natalia, and marisol go on a beach vacation in august of 2023. It gets angsty and gay." word count: 40k important tags: vacation, eddie/mariol, buck/natalia, mariol/natalia, coming out, feelings confession, sexuality, everyone is queer listen to you breathing (is where i wanna be) by: yavilee "the one where buck is presumed dead after a building collapse and eddie has to live through the reminder that tomorrow isn't promised to anyone" word count: 41k important tags: presumed dead, major character injury, mutual pining, grief, panic attacks, friends to lovers all that we intend is scrawled in sand (and slips right through our hands) by: withmeornotatall "buck and eddie get trapped together, time is running out, and eddie doesn't want to die alone" word count: 6.9k important tags: near death experiences, major character injury, whump, love confessions, getting together, first kiss

actually, truly by: milenadaniels "helena (and ramon) tries to find a way back into eddie's life and doesn't know what to make of finding buck around every corner she turns." word count: 14k important tags: multiple pov, season 4/shooting, homophobia, internalized homophobia, recovering from injury, pre-relationship, getting together, team as family, supportive!isabel diaz, coming out i know you're hurting (but so am i) by: justhockey "eddie understands better than maybe anyone else ever could, how it feels to have everything unravel in the palm of your hands. he knows frustration - he knows fury. he’s painfully familiar with that burning rage that crackles in the tips of your fingers, that makes your skin hot and chest tight, and makes you want to punch anyone that dares to even look at you. but that doesn’t give chim the right to lay a damn hand on buck" word count: 3.7k important tags: hurt/comfort, ptsd, feelings realisation, protective!eddie diaz, communication, 5x04 coda i want to reach out by: orphan_account "buck was a very emotional and physically clingy person, he knew this, once he had someone, he held on tight, scared they'd one day leave them. a drunk ana points out that maybe everyone is tired of it, and buck realises: maybe they are." word count: 5.7k important tags: insecure!evan buckley, ana flores bashing, hurt/comfort, touch starved, abandonment issues, love confessions

the aftermath of liberation and love confessions by: elvensorceress "in which eddie comes out, sexuality is complicated but coffee is not, buck makes an excessive salad and is also roasted, everyone has a love confession, and December is the most dramatic time of year." word count: 17k important tags: pining!eddie diaz, idiots to lovers, coming out, love confessions, demisexual!eddie diaz, post 5.09 and this is his life by: shyaudacity "in late june of nineteen ninety-one, mere hours after losing her son to cancer, margaret buckley takes a baby out of the hospital nursery and decides to bring him home" word count: 26k important tags: established relationship, kidnapping, emotional hurt, panic attacks, flashblacks, comforting!eddie diaz mirror, lie to me, tell me you can see by: anonymous "buck struggles with food and his body. it's not new." word count: 20k important tags: TW: eating disorder, established relationship, hurt/comfort, protective!maddie buckley, marriage proposal, sibling love, caring!eddie diaz without you, i'll never be home by: the_forgotten_nobody "after the tsunami, eddie invites buck to stay with him and christopher." word count: 45k important tags: hurt/comfort, post-tsunami/season 3, anxiety, separation anxiety, pining, sharing a bed

[genericpuff]

Okay, what was up with the "I'm with stupid" SpongeBob episode?

is this like a rhetorical question or are you asking for me to actually get into it lol because i absolutely will, here we go-

CW: discussions of ableism

honestly it's just one of those season 1-3 episodes that hasn't aged as well as all the others. like so much of seasons 1-3 are bangers, they often still hold up really well 20 years later and even the 'weaker' episodes are still solid and someone's favorite that they will fight to the death to defend

but the "I'm With Stupid" episode is genuinely the tarnish on that record because it's just. mean-spirited torturing and gaslighting of spongebob the whole way through. it's both foreshadowing of the declining quality of Spongebob that , at the time, we didn't know was coming (we know now) and foreshadowing of Patrick's character being devolved into the "big mean and dumb bully" archetype that comes around S4-5.

like for anyone who hasn't watched this episode or doesn't remember it, it's the one where patrick's parents are visiting and he's stressing out because his parents always treat him like an idiot (and we do know patrick isn't characterized as being "conventionally intelligent", but he's still a great guy throughout the first 3 seasons, he loves his friends, is the ultimate chill guy, and really he's just total ND vibes for anyone who remembers being that "not conventionally intelligent" kid growing up so I can def 100% understand the premise of this episode as someone who was that kid lmao)

and spongebob offers to help his friend out by sigh pretending to be stupid to make patrick look smarter by comparison

and i'm sure you can see where i'm going with this when i say this episode hasn't aged well

like it immediately starts on the wrong foot with the whole premise of spongebob playing the "protective helmet dummy" act which is just a cruel stereotype of disabled and neurodivergent individuals.

but then as it goes on, patrick basically weaponizes spongebob's idea against him by actually being mean to him the same way his own parents would (and yes his "parents" are cruel right out the gate to patrick, but then immediately shift focus to spongebob as the target once he arrives and puts on the "dumb person" act.)

is this resolved in any actually meaningful way? maybe something like the Squirrel Jokes episode where Spongebob gets rightfully called out by Sandy for making stereotypical jokes about squirrels which is a metaphor for jokes that punch down on girls/minorities/etc.?

nope, not at all. spongebob eventually gets so (rightfully) fed up with the bullying that he decides he's not gonna go along with it anymore esp when he offered to do this to help his FRIEND and that's now clearly being taken advantage of at his own expense. So he approaches the parents as his 'normal' self (ugh sorry i just hate using that word in this context) where he explains that he's not actually an 'idiot', he can do math and even knows how to do his own laundry (sigh, again, incredibly ableist). and how do patrick and his "parents" respond? oh right, they gaslight him and escalate the bullying. the parents don't believe that spongebob was putting on an act and just assume patrick "taught" him how to say the things he's saying to defend himself. which i don't even have to explain is just another level of mean-spirited because this is an ACTUAL THING that happens to neurodivergent / disabled children, their needs aren't taken seriously by the adults around them and because they're often seen as purely the stereotypes of their disabilities, they're talked down to and mistreated just because they don't function the same way that neurotypicals do in a society that's designed for neurotypicals.

anyways, spongebob is literally driven into a meltdown by the parents and patrick gaslighting him, and he runs home crying. that is the last that we see of him in the episode.

and then the "parents" happen to say their names out loud to each other and that's when patrick realizes they're... not his real parents. and the parents go "oh duh, that's right, we don't have a son!"

and that's it. that's the resolution to the episode. there is no moral, it tries to "get back" at patrick and his shitty fake parents by being like "haha see! they're stupid!!" but it just ??? doesn't at all make up for the 10 minutes of manipulating and abusing and gaslighting spongebob???

like up until this point in the show, the one who's usually on the end of the abuse is Squidward, sometimes Mr. Krabs, but both of them are often at the end of some kind of physical comedy as karma. Mr. Krabs is a scummy greedy capitalist, so of course anything that happens to him after he's done something awful is karmic justice in the form of an anti-capitalist metaphor that's funny for children and satisfying for the adults re-watching Squid on Strike who go, "OMG Mr. Krabs is unfair!" Of course because it's a serialized kid's show, it does have to go back to the status quo at the end of each episode so nothing can really come of Squidward dismantling oppression board by board (Spongebob is literally us when we were 6 btw, "Gee, IDK what Squidward's talking about, but he sure sounds convincing" which is just genius writing lol), but even episodes like Squid on Strike and Selling Out have incredibly timeless and STILL APPLICABLE MESSAGES about late stage capitalism and the death of small businesses under the weight of massive, predatory corporations that, if anything, have only aged BETTER over time because now the 6 year olds who watched that back in the 2000's are adults and living the reality that Squidward was living in.

and then ofc when it comes to Squidward, well, it's usually also karma after he took things too far in his cynical opposition to Spongebob's childhood wonder. In a lot of ways, Squidward is simultaneously an empathetic reflection of the adults who have had to survive under the oppression of capitalism, many of them giving up their hopes and dreams to do so; but also a grim reminder that if we're not careful and don't appreciate the little things that bring us joy, we too can become jaded and oppressive to the next generation.

there's a lot in the older Spongebob episodes that's a lot more counter-culture than people give it credit for (unsurprising though considering Stephen Hillenburg himself was a Gen X'er and many shows pioneered by Gen X'ers throughout the 80's and 90's were writing from a comically cynical point of view, like they hated capitalism and the boomers too, this shit runs deep LOL) making it a way more progressive show than many people give it credit for because on the surface, it's just that dumb kids show with the annoying laughing sponge.

nothing about I'm with Stupid is counter-culture or fighting for the "little guys" like so many other episodes do. whether it was a blind spot on Hillenburg's end or another writer on the staff who was severely misinformed, the entire episode shows its age in the most exhausting, uncomfortable, ableist way, by stringing together 11 excruciating minutes of gaslighting and manipulating a normally positive and endearing character who was just trying to help their friend, with no closure or apology towards said character, and no resolution or message in the end about how treating people differently based on their perceived intelligence is wrong and cruel. I feel like somewhere under all the mean-spirited attempts at "jokes", there was some fringe message about how right-wing assholes will look for lesser targets to "punch down on" or use manipulation tactics to make their victims appear weak by poking them in all the right places, but it's lost in the mishandling of the episode's overall structure where it spends the majority of time playing into disability / neurodivergent stereotypes for comedy, bullying a character who did nothing wrong, and then hastily resolves itself by leaving the message at "welp, at least Spongebob isn't as stupid as Patrick and his parents!"

this turned into a longer and more introspective post than I had planned, but man, I was genuinely shocked when I rewatched that episode for the first time in ages and realized it had come out during the seasons 1-3 era which has, y'know, the episodes that are still the most popular to this day 20 years later and contain the majority of every Spongebob meme template out there (of which there are a LOT).

Like I swear to god I always remembered this episode being part of the sort-of-later era, like shortly after the movie came out but before it became entirely mean-spirited in its comedy post-Hillenburg. But nope, I'm With Stupid accompanies Procrastination, one of my own personal favorite episodes from that era because it perfectly encapsulates the ADHD experience, both of which aired in 2001, three years before the Spongebob movie which is when most people agree that Spongebob 'peaked'.

I was just so stunned by that because most episodes of that seasons 1-3 era are generally so positive and equalizing between the varied characters, and when that balance is thrown off, it's usually for the sake of sending a message about being kind and accepting to one another. Shit, Sandy is someone whose entire characterization revolves around her being conventionally intelligent, she literally built a rocketship to fly to the moon, and yet in the very first episode where she meets Spongebob, as soon as she finds out Spongebob couldn't breathe without water, she doesn't make fun of him, she doesn't chastise him for lying to her, she simply accommodates him and Patrick by giving them fishbowls to wear on their heads whenever they want to visit her in her home, which we always see them wearing in subsequent episodes when they go to visit her (at worst she says "you could have asked" in response to their need for water, but in her defense, they gave her the impression they knew what air was and it does make a point about how we need to all play our role in both sides of the conversation so people can express their needs without feeling like a "nuisance"); and we always see her going out and interacting with her friends in Bikini Bottom in her suit, which people don't make fun of her for, until at the earliest the Squirrel Jokes episode which, again, see above, her getting made fun of by Spongebob and everyone in town is meant to serve as a message not to pick on people for their differences.

And no , I'm not saying all this as some nostalgic Spongebob fan, I'm saying this as someone who both watched the shit out of Spongebob as a kid AND as an adult, who regularly rewatches their favorite episodes from the earlier era of the show, has almost all of those season 1-3 episodes memorized line for line (even the ones I don't watch as often anymore), and is currently doing a binge watch of every episode from S1-3. I hadn't watched I'm with Stupid in a long time. Maybe that was for a good reason 😒💀

[mychlapci]

The broodmare Megatron still being intimating and fully prepared to throw down ask gave me an idea. Specifically for the tfa broodmare ship au.

A Carrier's instinct to protect their brood is a powerful urge, and despite the Autobot broodmares being, well, Autobot broodmares, they were still at one point trained to fight. Bumblebee and Bulkhead were in the Autobot boot camp, they were intended to join the elite guard so they must have trained accordingly. Despite Ratchet being an old mech now and a Medic to boot, he was still on the battlefield and can whoop serious ass if need be. Prowl is a fucking cyber ninja for God's sake. And Optimus was the star student of the Autobot Academy, getting top marks in every class and even managed to get the title of Prime before he even graduated.

And Omega Supreme is, well, Omega Supreme.

If anyone were to enter their nests or bother their clutches/sparklings without permission, they wouldn't hesitate to start throwing hands regardless of their pregnancy status.

Bulkhead's a big mech, usually the mere presence of a massive pissed off carrier is enough to deter wannabe intruders. But if one were to try to bother him or his bitties, they would be in for a rather personal introduction to his wrecking ball fists.

Anyone who tries to mess with Prowl who's not one of his chosen studs or one of the other broodmares that make up his team is usually treated to a shuriken to the back and a foot to the face before getting kicked out.

Anyone who messes with Bee, well, they're in for quite the shock. Those stingers are no joke, he would practically electrocute them into a coma. He's also a fast little bugger so you wouldn't even see him coming before you suddenly feel the wrath of Zeus come down upon you for daring to mess with his clutches or whatever bitties he's babysitting.

Omega Supreme is a Titan. And a warship. It's just stupidity to try anything with him. Anyone who is stupid enough to mess with his hotspots will be treated to the full power of a Titan.

Ratchet, well, he usually has Deadlock to protect him and his bitties. If he's busy elsewhere, Ratchet usually just throws them out with his magnets. But if someone were to get past Deadlock, they'd have a pissed off Medic on their ass who knows the Cybertronian body inside and out and will use that knowledge against them. They'd probably still be online as Ratchet tears them apart piece by piece.

But if getting caught by Ratchet is torture, then being caught by Optimus, Megatron's personal broodmare, is a Death Sentence. He wouldn't stop at just throwing you out of his nest like the others, he would Hunt You Down. As the captain and leader of the Orion and his Autobots, his territory extends past his nest. This includes the other's nests (though even he wouldn't enter without prior permission), Omega Supreme (since aside from Ratchet, he's basically Omega's speaker), his hab-suite (it's actually Megatron's) and various other areas on the Nemesis he adopted.

So it doesn't even have to be his bittlets - or even anyone else he views under his protection - you disturbed, it could be any of his teammates and once they kick you out of their nests, you're at his mercy. Usually he just makes an example of them by scaring the pit out of them with a rather terrifying game of cat-and-mouse then beating the slag out of them to deter them from ever approaching his territory again. (The first time he does this, Megatron swears he falls in love just little more watching this half feral carrier verbally, mentally, and physically tear into the would-be intruder.) But if they were to hurt anyone on his team, any mech under his protection, or - Primus forbid - any of the sparklings, all bets are off, that just made this everyone's problem. That's a dead mech walking.

To be welcomed into the nest of a Carrier is like being on sacred ground and the Carrier is the Deity that rules it. Anyone - bittlet or not - willingly welcomed within the nest or even territory is the Carrier's responsibility to care for and nurture as much as the guest is to respect and abide by the Carrier's rules. (Which is why there's very few instances of in-fighting within Optimus' territory, he has little to no patience for such behavior.) If a Carrier feels threatened, usually a sire or other protective mech steps in to defend them. But if it's within their own nest/territory? They have no problems protecting themselves. A Carrier's duty is to protect their charges as much as it is to nurture them.

Unfortunately, the Autobots have no concept of this, which lands them in quite a bit of trouble. The first - and only - time Sentinel tries to get into Optimus' nest, he figures out real quick why Megatron likes him so much. He doesn't try to mess with Optimus again after that. (Though there is some part of him that is a little jealous of all the attention Optimus is getting.)

yessssss god, i’m a sucker for broodmares’ nests being a sacred place where no one can step outside of the boudnaries they themself set... It’s so hot to me. And the Decepticons take it very seriously. Now that they’re keeping broodmares on the ship, most of the decepticon infighting has been subdued or kept very passive, all for the sake of the growing bitties and because no one knows when Megatron’s beloved broodmamma will waddle in and overhear everything. And if he tells Megatron, then they’re goners...

oh lord, who even let Sentinel on the decepticon warship... Maybe they’re trying to seize Megatron’s ship and make a little rescue mission out of it, perhaps there’s a peace treaty in the making so the autobots and decepticons are playing nice (even though i doubt they’re willing to go through with it... the autobots are too prideful and the decepticons are already building an army, as can be seen by the broodmares they’ve collected) and Sentinel ends up straying into Optimus’ nest... Megatron’s very own berthroom.

Optimus has never looked angrier, not that Sentinel noticed. He kept trying to get Optimus to get up, putting his damn hands on him, thinking he’ll be a hero who rescued a fellow autobot who was demoted into the role of lowly decepticon birthing machine... Optimus ends up decking Sentinel in the face, something he’d wanted to do for a long time, but always chose not to, just to keep the peace.... But Sentinel tried to poke at the baby in his arms, without permission, and he couldn’t stand that.

Sentinel ends up being chased away all the way through the ship until Optimus decides that he’s far enough from his nest... Megatron is very proud (if they’re taking over the ship, then Optimus has captured an intruding autobot, if they’re playing civil, then he’s taught the autobots some manners, at least...)

[mikaelsrose]

some thoughts and theories on abh so far

Both Raphael and Mikael's touch is said to be cold while David's is hot

If anyone has any theories about who the guys' superiors could be, please share because I have no idea.

I'm 1000% certain that the guys don't really live at the agency.

The mansion possessed a most unusual trait: if its residents weren't actively seeking you out, it was nearly impossible to find them yourself."

Moreover, I think MC was going somewhere and mentioned again that the house was empty.

"Our father went missing. I believe he's dead" - this actually makes me think the father they talk about isn't God.

This could be a red herring but the man who approaches MC at the club could be involved in the murder. His glassy eyes ("but he didn't look drunk") are definitely a hint and his hot-tempered personality make him very suspicious. "He looked around quiclkly," his outfit is rather out of place at this club, he's pushy and insistent. I found some info that glassy eyes could mean lifeless eyes and when you look at this dude, it's.......plausible (kinda kidding, kinda idk. He just looks suspicious)

I believe they all don't truly grasp the concept of emotions. Mikael doesn't really care about the clients + don't understand the concept of grief, David has no empaty for the deceased. Idk about Cas, and Raphael could be the one able to understand emotions (or he's just good at pretending and/or he feels the emotions his interlocutors do)

As for MC - I think the guys had sth to do with her patient going beserk and her ending up at Astrea. It's just a hunch, I don't have any proof, but they obviously need her for something, and I wouldn't be surprised if Mikael already knew she lost her medical licence.

Mikael:

Cheeky if you pay attention - even during the interview in ch 1 he laughs at MC's poor attempt of touching him under a really weak excuse (can't blame her though); "a playful spark flashed in his eyes," "sly smile" so he's not as stuck up as it looks at the first glance lol

Physically: a picture of Renaissance beauty, it is constantly stated he's very graceful and charismatic. MC also says he's very fit and has prominent muscles (which is surprising "for someone in his position); "stately figure"; statue chiseled out of marble".

He's Not a doctor, but yet heals. In ch. 4 he 1000% sucked the poison out of MC body, and I believe so not only because of what he says but also from the way his eyes look. He also says "I've never had a chance to heal mental wounds" which implies he's been healing for a long time.

David:

Could be far reaching and I formulate this theory mainly because I've been watching too much Supernatural lately, but I believe he's some type of a demon.

He's very confident and he "never loses" as a lawyer, so he's either very very good or able to influence people somehow.

MC obviously didn't end up in Astrea by accident, and she's the MC so she must be somehow special, so it makes me think David constantly calling her a witch isn't without a reason. Ch. 3: "don't admit to anyone in the village that you're a witch, either." Could be just a joke though.

Also the fact he was extremely friendly towards MC is suspicious, almost as if he tried to influence her to stay at all cost.

"It's impossible to get enough of me"

After the murder: "he's like a doctor who has seen death so many times that he hardly feels it anymore"

We learn his father lost his mind because he sold his soul. I've yet to come to any conclusions on this ngl.

Raphael:

I think he takes people's emotions onto himself and makes emotions come to the surface in people. Ch. 3: "Raphael approched the man, and the man's eyes filled with tears."

General:

Felonia emphasising that the guys treat MC differently, kindly and friendly. During the meeting in chapter 3, Mikael is cold and impartial when he talks to Fel

David: "You're so hash, Mikael"

"Only constant effort can attract his attention and make him believe that you deserve another chance" so the question is - who's he?

Felonia: "They're not villains, but they're not exactly heroes either. They have a mission and will go to any lengths necessary to complete it"

Mikael knows about the nightmares MC has and the dream we saw at the beginning of the book is definitely an answer to one of the big mysteries of the book, imo we'll learn what it means at the end of season 1 and it'll be the first supernatural thing we witness (although I'm not entirely sure because of how the last chapter ended)

Mikael: "Everyone's terribly worried about you" - why? They're not that close. They're worried because she's crucial to their plan.

My take is that Raph and Mikael are (arch)angels. Possibly fallen angels or at least angels who fucked up and are being punished. I'm not sure about Raphael, but if Mikael is the Angel Michael then he's the God's commander - his strict, controlled character, the fact he's the director of the agency then it kind of makes sense he;s so harsh to Felonia who seems to have seriously fucked up? He doesn't like disobedience.

Quora (don't judge me lol): "His power is believed to come from his closeness to God and his unwavering commitment to righteousness and the defeat of evil."

"The sword and shield are used today to represent a cutting of cords or energies that no longer serve and protecting us from harm. Michael can help in healing and repairing our energies where trauma, grief, past lives or karmic debts are holding us back from our true potential in this life. He will then work with Archangel Raphael to replace the negative energy, emotions, worries, doubts, physical ailments with positive vibrations. Michael will cleanse your entire being both the physical and spiritual."

@agattthaa mentioned that God is kind only to humans, he's not a good father to angels because he isn't present or forgiving to them; God forgives humans, but when angels make mistakes they fall from grace. Just a food for thought.

I'm curious about others' thoughts and theories. I just wanted to put all this together to sort it in my head as well.

Tagging @raleigh-edward 🫧

[signedkoko]

Mammon and either a Female or GN reader are in a relationship, and Reader has nightmares often.

Normally Reader is good at hiding it from Mammon if he notices something off, shrugging it as them being tired because they love him, but they think he's too greedy to really care about them that deeply- but he DOES care, and he learns about their nightmares one night during a particularly bad one where Reader wakes up screaming.

Mammon does his best to actually comfort them even if he's shit at it/not used to it, asking why Reader never told him about this and they reveal they thought he wouldn't care and the hidden caring side of Mammon comes out?

Pls.

Mammon X GN!Reader [Comfort]

In which you suffer from night terrors, and despite hiding it from Mammon he finds out.

Often times, when one has night terrors they will have a harder time staying still in bed

Though, this can easily be tossed away as someone being a messy sleeper, which is what you always told Mammon when he'd joke about having you web you up to keep you still

And preferably not attacking him in your sleep

He was always lighthearted or dismissive about it, so you assumed you could get away with just that

Even if these nightmares bothered you, and often left you restless, you'd rather that than bother him with something so childish

But sometimes they were way worse than you could have imagined, and on one particular evening you seemed to erupt

A fit of hysterical screaming and crying woke Mammon up before you did, and it took several tries of him trying to shake you awake before your eyes finally opened

" Fuck! D'ya need a hospital or somethin? "

He was probably yelling as loudly as you were, but mostly because he assumed you were shot or something

I mean hey, who wouldn't try to attack one of the sins? He was always worrying your affiliation with him could possibly lead to your death, amongst other things

A quick scan of every single inch of you told him you weren't physically harmed, but the bags under your eyes were getting darker by the days and he couldn't help but prod

" It's nothing, I didn't mean to wake you. "

" Bloody hard to sleep through that! Just tell me what's wrong! "

Mammon never gave a shit about anyone but himself, or that's the impression many get

But you've been a real turning point for him, he almost treats you like an extension of his own being

He is short tempered though, so he pretty much forces you into revealing what's troubling your sleep, and why you've never mentioned it before

Mammon gets very huffy when you say it seems like he doesn't care, but give him a moment and he will start grumbling apologies and trying to say that he does care

" Well, y'know, you're mine n shit. Take care of what's yours, right? Just tell me this shit! "

Closest you'll get to him being sweet

Author's Note - Went for headcanons since it was not specified! Thank you for requesting!!

[tossawary]

I'm going to rewatch "Revenge of the Sith" later and I don't remember the original trilogy all that well either, but... both "The Phantom Menace" and "Attack of the Clones" seem to suffer tremendously during their final battles because the films keep cutting away from the potentially dramatically and emotionally rich sequences to... the childish physical comedy adventures of sidekick characters.

I'm not going to pretend that "Star Wars" isn't incredibly silly at times. "Return of the Jedi" has the Empire being murdered by teddy bears with sticks at one point, and I am personally incredibly fond of this sequence and the Ewoks generally for no good reason I can name. But, from what I remember, that movie was better editing-wise about letting more dramatic sequences like Luke versus Vader breathe emotionally. We had some time to settle into these fights, to feel Luke's fear and anger, to see Luke's resolve, you know?

And in "A New Hope", the climatic dogfights involve people dying and it's treated quite seriously. A lot of lives are on the line with the Death Star's destruction. The characters go into the battle knowing that some of them won't make it back. And in "The Empire Strikes Back"... as far as I vaguely remember, there's not very much silliness at all at the end of that movie, the protagonists "lose" and all of the characters are in a lot of pain. The camera stays with them to show us their agony and grief and strength.

But in "The Phantom Menace", the film keeps cutting away from Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan versus Maul in favor of Jar-Jar Binks tripping over droids. Jar-Jar Binks fighting to defend his homeworld against an invading army, as his people die around him, is treated as an utter joke. Pure comedic relief with no substance at an utterly inappropriate time. They are undercutting the "war" in "Star Wars" that was a big part of its tone. The film doesn't bother to treat anyone like they or their lives matter in that sequence. And Anakin is in a ship he's struggling to pilot against an entire army, but we never get any real sense of him being afraid of dying in space or being at risk, as he almost accidentally saves the day. Padmé is just... fighting down hallways and it's kind of boring, both action-wise and emotionally. I spent most of the time wishing that the camera would just cut back to Maul again because that fight had actual, like, substance.

And in "Attack of the Clones", the film keeps wasting time cutting back to Threepio with his head accidentally stuck on a battle droid's body, when it's not even clear why he and Artoo are even there beyond just jamming them in as iconic figures from the original trilogy. They shouldn't be there!!! This is blatant shoehorning!!! This is valuable screentime that the Battle of Geonosis could use to focus on the Jedi who are being killed, on the separatists who are being invaded, or on the clones who have just entered the war. Mace Windu or Obi-Wan Kenobi reacting emotionally to the nameless Jedi being cut down around them would have been nice. The confrontations with Dooku could have dug deeper into the emotional and physical pain of his betrayal.

Mace Windu's fight with Jango could have been longer, instead, seeing as the hardest emotional beat we actually get in this film confronting the death of this battle is probably Boba picking up Jango's helmet. A kid has lost his dad!!! We could have seen any of the clones reacting to this, maybe? We could have seen Mace Windu telling Obi-Wan about Jango's death and then Obi-Wan belatedly realizing that they don't know what happened to Jango's child in the chaos. "The Clone Wars" television show ended up doing so much heavy lifting emotionally for this trilogy, because these movies are way too busy with unnecessary Jar-Jar Binks and Threepio physical comedy in all the wrong places.

"Revenge of the Sith" as far as I remember is at least too busy finally focusing on everything going to hell and the tragedy to fit in a jarring sidekick comedy sequence during any final battle. Can you even imagine? Anakin is murdering younglings and the movie keeps cutting back to Threepio and Jar-Jar tripping over droids and shrieking trying to escape Coruscant? I don't remember the movie that well. If there actually is a sidekick physical comedy sequence through the end of the fights in "Revenge of the Sith" that I have blocked from my memory, then I am going to scream into a pillow.

[crystalrainfall]

Dear Izumi Curtis,

Maybe stranding kids on an Island, with no survival tools other than a knife and forbidding the use of alchemy, their only real reliable source and means of survival to make things easier, since these are children, might've been a mentally deranged decision.

I do not care that an employee was there to take care of the children, if said employee's only purpose was to fight the already weakened, and vulnerable, hurt children and steal recourses, such as hard earned food, from them in order to "train" or "toughen" them up...

The real risk of that wound Ed obtained from a WILD fox is nothing to scoff at.

The wound could've been infected if not treated properly, which I don't think a couple of children could've done easily, regardless of if they are geniuses or not ...

It's still highly irresponsible.

That's not to mention the diseases that fox could've carried.

This scenario could've ended in such tragedy which is only caused through pure negligence.

I do not care that Izumi herself was trained in a much harsher scenario, she was clearly an adult during her training in Briggs and thus could probably asses the situation and consent.

Which children just can't, no matter how much a child thinks they know an 10-9 year old just isn't mature.

And I don't even think pinako, the legal guardian for the two boys at the time knew of this, because if she did she rightfully so wouldn't have allowed it....

I hate that this is played off as a joke, that the two were trained in an absurd way...It's so easy to forget that fma is an anime when it's usually very grounded in reality and tries to explore deep conflicts... But when similar serious topics get ignored, the handling of the other topics fall flat and almost ignorant...

Slapstick in 2003 doesn't work.

It doesn't when the show tries to tackle extreme topics and tries to take itself serious...

Edward fearing Izumi and being physically hurt by her isn't funny because it feels out of place in a show that's meant to tackle trauma...

It feels like these issues are ignored and undermined.

Like I get this part was supposed to be a joke but it just comes off as not funny... Because you're just left asking yourself "is this actually trauma or just a joke?"

Which I think is the wrong message.

Just that it unintentionally comes off as extremely manipulative, having someone who's supposed to be a maternal figure for Ed and Al show this much violence...

And mind you, this is exclusive to Ed and Al. No other kid has ever been hit or treated that way, yelled at?, sure, but even then it was mild. Tf kind of messaging is that? It's okay to harm the ones closest to you? You're doing it for their own good? As long as the person treats you good afterwards it's okay to be hit?

Like I know this is probably unintentional, because these issues just aren't addressed in the show, so it's not meant to be taken literally but damn did they miss the mark hard!...

Like this entire sequence just pisses me off, there's already a post on this site which discusses the harsh flinch that Ed had when Mustang approached him after Nina's death in the alleyway...

The 5th picture of him just expecting to be hit again and accepting it... Just is wrong...

Like is this kid just used to it? Being treated like dog shit by authority or adult figures in his life, by anyone that isn't his deceased mother?

And the entire scene is flat, no music no nothing... This is just painful to watch. The hug afterwards just comes off as empty, damage control, to apologize after hurting someone, but doing it again.