#but it applies to literally almost Anything she does

[smileytriceratops]

watching leverage is truly a "giggling and kicking my feet" experience for me personally. it's genuinely such a fun show with such fun and compelling characters that i can't help but grin like an idiot at my screen when they do barely anything

[onmykneesformatt]

vanilla - c.s.

requested: yes!!

synopsis: after a lengthy relationship, chris decides to try and surprise you on your 7 month anniversary. it doesn’t go how he planned, and he feels bad.

warnings: SMUT OH MY FUCK. just very aggressive (no major abuse or violence), degrading, choking, hair-pulling, overstimulation, use of safe word, aftercare, angst (happy ending tho!!), i don’t think anything else but lmk!!

a/n: i think it’s about time i write smth about chris and feed y’all. so, eat up!! (also i tried to put a picture and it literally wouldn’t let me😭)

you and chris never really thought about kinks or anything like that. you had talked about it, but the furthest you two ever went was just filming it once or twice. even then, it was still very vanilla. it was soft, enjoyable, and not very rough.

chris wanted to change that.

“so, wait. are we going somewhere?”

“we can, but that’s not the surprise.”

chris kind of smirked, knowing that his surprise was not something you expected.

“can you just tell me? it almost dark out and we’be barely done anything all day except for you making me a nice breakfast. which, i did appreciate by the way.”

“you’re welcome, and no. i’m not telling you.”

he tapped his fingertips together and chuckled lightly. he liked surprising you. he’d done it multiple times before. a bouquet on your door step, a new pair of expensive heels, even flying home early from boston and not telling you. it was his thing.

and tonight was a surprise.

-

at 9:30 pm, you started to get ready for bed. you almost did it in protest for how you and chris barely did anything today.

“oooh, what’s this? toner? replace the t with a b.”

he giggled. how dare he? after not giving you a major day like he does every other anniversary?

you kept a straight face, not breaking eye contact with your face in the mirror as you kept applying serums and creams.

“what’s wrong?”

“nothing, chris.”

he knew that whenver you ended a sentence with his name, you were mad.

“look, how about i meet you in the bedroom in five minutes, and make it up to you?”

you let a little smile show, remembering that your surprise to him was a peachy-orange lingerie set that hugged you in all the right places and showed all the right skin.

“fine.”

-

it started slow and sweet, like always.

but it slowly turned into more.

he went from having you on your back with him lightly laying on you to flipping you onto all fours and ripping the new lingerie set off— literally.

“chris-“

“shut up and take it. i know you can, slut.”

it felt good, the way he was pounding into you.

what didn’t feel good was him calling you the one word you didn’t like. after he started pulling your hair, it all felt real.

were you really just some toy he used? was this his breaking point where he realized he didn’t actually like or respect you like he pretended?

“chris, i don’t-“

he pushed your face into the pillow, tightening his grip on your hair.

“i said shut the fuck up. god, you really are just some slut who thinks she can do anything she wants.”

tears started welling in your eyes. they only strengthened when he started swatting your ass and digging his free hand into your back.

it hurt. like, actually hurt. but he wouldn’t listen.

he was never like this. chris? be aggressive? especially in such a vulnerable moment? never. until now.

after almost suffocating with your face in the pillow for what felt like hours, you tried to shift your face over just enough to be able to breathe. it was hard, with his grip on your hair pushing your head down into it.

eventually, you were able to properly breathe. you started breathing heavier and heavier. not from pleasure, but from overstimulation. from pain.

“i- i can’t! chris!”

he could barely hear you over his grunts and the sounds of skin slapping loudly.

“cant.. can’t what? slut can’t use her words now?”

you tried, but he was causing you so much pain that the tears were taking over. so much so, that you just broke.

what he thought were breaths and tears of pleasure started to settle in, and he finally realized. your pillow and face wet with a taste of salt, and your heart pounding so bad you started shaking.

he slowed down, moving your messy, wet hair out of your face.

“vanilla! vanilla!”

your safe word. you never needed it before, but you guys thought of it after having sex the first or second time. he always wanted you to know you were in control of what was happening too. in a sort of inside joke/mockery, he made it “vanilla”.

“hey- hey.”

he took a second to gather himself and pull out, sitting next to you on the bed. your body fell limp on the sheets.

“what’s wrong-“

“no!”

he tried to rub your shoulder, but your yelling frightened him. it should’ve. the way he caused you the pain he did was horrible.

“hey-“

“just- stop! what-“

your crying intensified, leaving him with a concerned look.

“what made you think that was okay?!”

you tried to stand, stabling yourself with a hand on the bed and the other holding a throw blanket to cover your body.

“what do you mean-“

“what do i mean? chris- you just.. started going crazy! it felt good at first, but you pulled my hair, you dug your nails into my back! you- you called me a slut!”

“i thought-“

“no you didn’t! you didn’t think at all!”

it finally hit him.

that word.

the one word he promised to never use.

“baby- i didn’t mean any of it!”

“then why’d you do it!”

tears turning into anger at his stupidity slowly dried up.

“i thought it would be a nice surprise for our anniversary! but, i’m sorry. i forgot about that word.”

that word was used against you everyday in highschool, ever since you gave some kid a handjob at the park. anytime you wore something even slightly revealing. it opened a floodgate for name-calling.

the tears started up again once silence filled the bedroom.

again, chris was never like this. you always thought he would provide the comfort you so desperately needed in your life. however, it seemed like he thought otherwise.

chris stood up, walked around the bed, and engulfed you in his arms. after realizing that he truly didn’t mean it (doesn’t make it okay, but it’s good he realized he was in the wrong), you hugged him back.

“how about we clean up. can i help you with that?”

you sniffled while stepping back from him. you dropped the blanket and wiped your eyes.

“yeah.”

you spoke softly, still trying to catch light breaths.

he grabbed your hand, leading you the bathroom.

he started the shower, grabbing your coconut body wash out of the bathroom closet along with a soft, white towel.

after getting you into the perfectly-warm shower, he started to clean you up. he didn’t let you move a muscle. he made sure you were fully clean and taken care of before even thinking about himself. he grazed your body with the loofah, making sure every inch was perfectly covered.

“i really am sorry, baby. i didn’t mean to take it that far. i think i just got too excited. i’ll never do it again, i can promise you that.”

“a warning would’ve been nice. i get why you did it. throw in a little variety, or whatever. but that word really set me off.”

“i know, i know.”

he kissed the back of your damp head, making sure you knew he meant his sorrow.

“i forgot. but, no excuse. how about now i dry you off and get you into some comfy clothes, hm?”

his tone was low but sweet. your heart stopped racing, your breath caught up, and your mind was at ease.

“okay.”

after he dried you off, still not letting you do it yourself, he grabbed your hand to lead back into the bedroom. while you were sat patiently on the edge of the bed, he rummaged through drawers and shelves looking for your favorite sleep shirt and a pair of under wear with comfortable shorts.

“this good?”

“yes. thank you.”

“stand up, please.”

you dropped your towel, letting him glide the extra large graphic tee over your head. you lifted each leg as he slid the underwear up, then doing the same with the loose shorts.

“get comfy in bed, i got some treats for you earlier.”

“really? thank you, chris.”

“anything for my girl. she deserves nothing but the best, so i try all for her.”

he kissed your forehead before you slid into the bed, pulling the thick comforter over your body and turning on your favorite show.

-

you fell asleep in eachothers arms, but not until he gave you a lengthy apology.

you know he didn’t mean it, but he needed you to remember he wouldn’t do it again.

his heartbeat under your head lulled you into a deep slumber. a soft, orange light coming from the lamp in the corner of the bedroom mixed with the tv still playing your favorite show made just enough light for you to not have any other worries that night. an open bag of the tastiest chocolate on the nightstand next to two open soda cans had filled your stomach and your heart. the soft laugh tracks in the background and fan lightly blowing on you gave you the comfort you needed.

the biggest comfort was chris’ concern.

he loves you.

you love him.

that’s all you need.

-

AHHHH ITS DONEEEEEEE!!!!! i pray that this is as good as y’all are expecting 😭😭 but seriously though, i thank y’all for the support. i’m at 300 followers already (WHAT THE FUCK) and i couldn’t have done it without you guys. love y’all!! mwah!!💋❣️🌺

taglist: @sleepysturniolo @suyqa @jessie-essie @sturnsobsessed

sorry if i missed anyone that wanted to be tagged!!

[astrologydayz]

ASTRO SEXOLOGY NOTES🔞 - NATAL CHART3

Venus in 12th house, or 5th/8th house ruler in 12th house can get into "love" affairs while being on vacations/retreats/In foreign countries/while they're in a hospital/psych ward, and even in prison

Mars square/quincunx MC makes u so damn fine! U can carry yourself a bit "rougher" tho/look unapproachable = "people being intimidated by u", & u being a little "what the fuck u staring at", and we love it💋🤣. People with Venus conjunct/trine/quintile Eros asteroid - 433) r really sexual individuals. But they most of the time need a "personal connection" of some kind, before jumping in2 bed with someone. They ooze sexual confidence tho, because they know what they want&need sexually🤤🫦. Casanova asteroid - 7328) in Libra/7th house/aspecting Jupiter can “stray" away from their partner, quite easily. They can quickly find somebody else, that they find more "fascinating". They get bored fast! But this mostly applies 2men tho💻📓.

Inner planets in earth signs = very sexual beings, so idk what the fuck people r on about. We just don't fuck the 1st John we c on the street🤷‍♀️. Really picky when choosing a sexual/romantic partner, and we also need 2 know that you're trustworthy 1st. But when you finally pull through, we'll show u what freaky means😘.

Scorpio Mars in/8th/12 house in a MAN'S chart can go 4 hourssss 😵‍💫😵‍💫🫠🫠. Unless Mars is afflicted by other planets, like Saturn, or Jupiter. Saturn ruled people got piercings almost always - body/head/genitals🫦👅). Saturn rules piercings, (restriction, and Steel). Add a little pain 2 the mix, &😍.

Pluto conjunct Mars in a MAN'S chart = some serious sex appeal. They're so fucking smooth2, and have no problem with showing their dominant side. They can easily steal yo girl⚠🍆🔮. Everyone wants a piece💦🙄🤣👄.

Venus/Mars/Pluto in 3rd house likes 2 talk during sex. "U like that baby?" "tell me how much u want it", "yeah I like it, when u got your mouth full🍆🍑". They also get off on how much u can "out smart them" - Book smart or Street smart, either way🧏🤭🤓.

Sun opposite Black Moon Lilith can look for sexual partners that looks, or reminds them of their dad🤷‍♀️(Daddy issues).

Funny how people say that Mars/Venus in 8th/8th house in Scorpio people gets more interested, if u make us jealous??? I will literally erase u🫠🧐. If we wanted to share a person, we would have gone 2 a strip club instead.

Venus square Jupiter does not mean that the individual is "addicted 2 sex", unless anything else shows so.

Jupiter in 9th house/Jupiter aspecting 9th house can show that u have big hips/big thighs/long legs💛👅.

Asteroid Varuna (20000) conjunct/trine your 7th house means that your sexual partners makes u famous, "worldwide attention" because of who u date/have close relationships with✨. If it's in Gemini (example), then u could date famous singers, actors, motivational speakers, things like that.

POF conjunct 5th house can cause the individual 2 be very experienced in the department of love, by the end of their lives. They've dated a lot of different people most of the time, and have had all kinds of relationships - polyamorous with some, monogamous with others - examples.

Records asteroid - 30718) conjunct/opposite Mars in a MAN'S chart, can show that he "enchants" people (usually worldwide) with his sex appeal🤤🫠. The opposition shows a "complication", when it comes 2 this = wanting 2 break records for your talent/s/work, & not only4sex appeal👽.

U don't have 2 have Venus/Mars aspecting each other 2 be fine af/gain a lot of attraction from others bc of your looks/sex appeal. Look at Zac Efron - when he was young, Jungkook - BTS, Tupac🤤, Jackson Wang, Hyunjin from Skz, Rihanna, Marilyn, Austin Butler, Justin Bieber - I don't think he's hot, but some people do - I could keep going.

Women with Mars/Venus conjunct/in 8th house = typically sexually attracted2 "misunderstood individuals" - "someone who's bad, &only good4her" kind of thing. She needs an EVERYTHING BUDDY! A loyal lover/best friend/partner in crime! someone who will never doubt her, but challenge her/someone who brings a healthy amount of “competition"/sexy bantering. She also want someone who's REALLY ready2dominate the fuck out of her, bc she's so used2 dominating people on a daily basis💁‍♀️.

Eros - (433) conjunct 11th house = being sexually attracted 2friends/finding fwb relationships 2be the perfect "arrangement"🎉💃.

Mars conjunct/trine "Dominiona" asteroid - 24899) in a MAN'S chart = a VERY sexually dominant man😤👅. "Big daddy takes little daddy energy" - they can command 10 men like that🤌. Won't let anyone try2run up on em, at any time🫠🤤. Masters at dominating "brats"2, they'll put yo ass in place babe💋.

Venus quincunx Eros asteroid - 433) shows us that an individual typically feels like they're not as sexually "appealing" as people say they r/they won't believe others words. They won't "realise" that they're sexy as hell! They let their insecurities speak4them a lot. But once they start getting that “self assurance/self confidence” = they'll quickly realise that they're the shit, when it comes 2 "seducing" - "enticing" others❤️🍒.

THANKS4READING!!!

APPRECIATE U, ALWAYS💋

[emiko-matsui]

Okay, I just need to get something out of the way when it comes to the Kipperlilly conversation nobody's brought up yet, which I think is insane. Almost all of The Bad Kids would be more powerful if they didn't have their tragedy porn tragic backstories.

First of all, this doesn't apply to Fig and Gorgug because if Fig wasn't Gorthalax's child she would be a lot like Kipperlilly and not the ruler of hell. I wouldn't say Gorgug has a tragic backstory, he's got a pretty normal growing up experience with ups and downs.

Let's start with her #1 nemesis, Riz Gukgak. She's so jealous that his dad was murdered and that gives him an advantage in the adventuring life. To be crude, no, it doesn't. What would give Riz an advantage in the adventuring life would be living with someone who has a direct contact to all the government's inner workings and conspiracies. Now that would be an advantage. That gives you connections and clues that no one else can get. This is not what happened. What happened was eating cereal with water for breakfast, what happened was not getting an opportunity at college, what happened was a 9 year old who stopped sleeping, what happened was not your secret agent dad giving you an advantage in the school conspiracy because he's dead. Otherwise he fucking would've.

And now Kipperlilly's new #1 nemesis, Kristen Applebees. She was ostracised from her religion for her sexuality, she achieved sainthood, and raised a dead god back to life. None of this would've happened if she hadn't been raised in The Harvestmen. No, it wouldn't, but what would have happened if Kristen had been straight? Disgusting thought, yes, I know, but let's talk about it. A Kristen who never left Helio behind would have so many more fucking advantages than the one with Cassandra has. If she had followed her birthright she would be the only chosen one of one of the world's most powerful gods. Sol is the biggest god in Spyre and Helio is his son. Helio does not have a chosen one anymore because Kristen left. It's not a title that's just given out, it could only have been Kristen. You know what's an advantage? Being the chosen one of one of the world's most powerful gods, being a god's spoken favourite, and deified by all of that god's followers. Now that would be an unfair advantage. You know what's not an advantage? Being homeless at 14 and being at the mercy of your ex-girlfriend's uncle for housing, dying and having absolutely no one there for you so you're only option to survive is to trust your own abilities enough to raise yourself from the dead, and failing school because of biased teachers.

And what of Adaine Abernant? The Elven Oracle? Her tragedy porn tragic backstory is surviving an abusive home. Now I just have to imagine that Adaine would have it a lot easier than most students, an incredible amount of unfair advantages, if her old money parents paid for every wizard whim she wanted, kept her diplomatic immunity so she could do literally anything she wanted without consequences, and gave her a direct contact into the heart of the Fallinell government. Now that is what I would call an insane amount of unfair advantage. I would be furious at this rich kid who's never had to work for anything myself. This is not even close to the case. She's barely passing classes because she can't afford the material you're required, she goes to the guidance counsellor for panic attacks, and she's being hunted by her home government. I'd say that's about every single thing in her life working against her having it easy.

Fabian Aramais Seacaster. He's complicated since he is very privileged already. He gets 5000 gold a month just for existing. He's the captain of the Owlbears because he killed the previous one. He lives alone in a mansion. Yeah, that's pretty privileged. His parents are also so severely fucked up that if they hadn't been filthy rich they would've been absolutely horrible for him. If he had parents who unconditionally supported him and stayed with him through everything, then we could talk about perhaps the most powerful person in Elmville. In Solace possibly. The most feared pirate in history who single-handedly dismantled a monarchy and fights against armies on his own is at your beck and call, does whatever you ask him to, and loves you more than anything. The greatest swordswoman in the world, that bested the most feared pirate in the world, the daughter of one of the most influential elven families and immortal will do anything you ask her, loves you to bits, and would cheat any rules for you. To have that would just be insane. You can argue that Fabian already has unfair advantages because of his social status and inheritance. This is true, but this is also true within his own adventuring party. Now his parents aren't helping him with anything and are determined that he reach his legendary status on his own. Otherwise talk about a fucking advantage.

All this to say is that if Kipperlilly got all of The Bad Kids tragedy porn like she wanted she wouldn't have been better, but she would've made them better. There is an adventuring party out there in the multiverse that has a secret agent at their disposal, the only chosen one of a Sol religion, Bill Seacaster and Hallariel Lomenelda unprompted in their corner, and a seer with unending resources and diplomatic immunity. These would've been people you start a platform about adventuring not being fair for everyone because of. The people you went against was a homeless kid, a kid with an anxiety disorder, a trust fund kid, and someone with PTSD.

I've seen your posts about Kipperlilly being wrong for her validation, but right in the fact that The Bad Kids have been given larger plots and mysteries because of their families and circumstances and I don’t want to fucking see another one. When you make that I want you to think about the adventuring party they would've been without their backstories. The insanely powerful and privileged adventuring party that almost happened. Their life got made worse, not easier because their life could have been so fucking easy. Kipperlilly can take all the tragedy porn she wants and then maybe realise that that's not what makes the adventurer. That the reason she's mad at The Bad Kids is the only reason she can even tangentially compete with them.

[sincerestlove]

Insecure

i hope you enjoy <3

Pairing: Regina George x Reader

Warnings: None

~

“God, this outfit looks awful too!” Regina groaned loudly, haphazardly tossing her top across the room, landing somewhere on the floor along with the numerous others. She had been looking for an outfit for the better part of an hour now, for Karen’s graduation party. You sighed, a small smile tugging at the edges of your lips at the sight of your frustrated girlfriend.

You two had been together since sophomore year, now both scholarly graduates and attending the same school in the fall. The summer had just begun, and all of your friends were throwing their own respective graduation parties before you all went your separate ways.

You had just finished applying mascara at her vanity, turning to glance over your shoulder. “Gina.” You called out to her, but soon realized she didn’t even hear you over the grumbles and complaints that she was making under her breath. You stood up then, walking over to see her rifling through hangers inside the massive closet.

She jumped in surprise when you rested your hands on her tensed shoulders, her head whipping around, blonde hair almost smacking you in the face. “What is it, Y/N? I’m trying to find something to wear.” She spoke sharply, visibly stressed as the clock was ticking closer toward your departure time. You didn’t reply nor take her tone personally, instead gently tugging her toward the armchair seated in the corner of the closet. You physically pushed her down, motioning for her to sit, her bright blue eyes looking at you pointedly. “Really? We can’t have sex right now.” You sputtered a laugh, leaning down to press a kiss to the blonde’s forehead.

“Regina, I’m not trying to have sex right now. Just sit down and be quiet. I’m picking an outfit for you.” She raised a brow at your bold choice of words, but leaned back in the chair, letting out a breath. You booped her nose playfully, before turning to her mounds of clothing.

Taking a moment to take it all in, you moved to grab a pair of high waisted jeans, a tight fitting long sleeved pink top, and her signature docs. Holding up the outfit, you nodded in approval, handing Regina the clothes. She pursed her lips, but looked satisfied with your choices. You left the closet to allow her to change, moving back over to the vanity to make some last minute touch-ups to your light makeup and hair.

“Does this look okay?”

You spun around and felt butterflies in your stomach, taking in your girlfriend’s appearance. She looked gorgeous, top and jeans fitting her perfectly. You got up and walked over to Regina, who had a nervous furrow between her brow. You reached up, cupping her face and smoothing down the lines. “You look absolutely breathtaking, Gina. So beautiful.”

You saw a soft blush rise onto her cheeks, looking down bashfully. “I don’t know if I like it. My arms look huge.” You sighed, taking her hands and leading her to sit in front of the vanity. Carefully adjusting, you decided to sit on her lap, tucking a few strands of soft hair behind her ears.

She looked vulnerable, eyes filled with anxiety and self-doubt. The sight tugged at your heart. You cupped her face again, making sure not to ruin her makeup. “Gina, you look so pretty. You’re the prettiest girl in the world and you’ll be the prettiest girl at that party, as always.” You spoke sincerely, moving closer to press a soft kiss to her lips. Her hands came up to grip your hips, squeezing gently, but she didn’t say anything. “I’m serious. You are literally so pretty, it makes me want to scream.” She laughed at that one, bright teeth on display. You giggled along with her, kissing her again.

This time, she slightly deepened the kiss, teeth nipping and tugging at your bottom lip. A hand came up to tug on your hair, moving your head back. Regina took the opportunity to move her lips down to your exposed neck, sucking and biting at the sensitive skin, leaving bruises in her path. Your head lolled back, moving up to rest your forearms on the cold vanity behind you. Regina continued kissing your neck, hands moving to sneak up your shirt, long nails dragging up and down your sides.

“Regina.” You warned, biting your lips to stifle the sounds threatening to spill out. “We have to get going, or we’ll be late.” The blonde hummed, feeling her smile against your neck.

“And?”

“Gina.”

“Ugh, fine.”

She groaned annoyedly, a small pout on her perfectly painted lips. You laughed, kissing her pout away with small pecks. “Later, I promise. Anything you want, I’m yours.”

“Anything?” She grinned, head cocked to the side. She looked absolutely adorable.

“Yes, Gina. Anything.” She smiled triumphantly.

As if I could ever say no to her.

She paused for a minute, fixing my shirt. “Thank you, by the way.” She spoke, eyes looking up at me with softness.

“For complimenting you and talking about how beautiful and hot you are? I can do that all day, baby.” You smiled, kissing her soft lips one more time, before moving to get off her lap and holding out a hand for her. We both grabbed our respective purses and Regina grabbed her car keys on our way out the door.

Once outside and in front of her bright pink Jeep, Regina moved to open the door for me, gesturing dramatically with her arm. “Get in, cutie. We’ve got a party to get to.”

~

i hope you enjoyed. thank you so much for reading!! :)

[maelancoli]

Writing Explicit Intimacy More Deeply

okay after the kissing post i've wanted to try to write something about actual sexual scenes. it's taken me a while to figure out what approach to take for such a broad subject because this is such a subjective form of writing and everyone has very strong opinions and varying proclivities. the truth is you are not going to please everyone and there will be a chunk of people who will always dislike your choice of words. and so even in writing a post to help others, there's going to be people who strongly disagree or find what i prefer to be cringe or unerotic.

the portrayal of sexual intimacy and the approaches taken are as varied as the sexual preferences, appetites, turn ons and turn offs of every day real people. this can either make you freeze up when writing, or free you to realize there is no 100% right way to approach erotic art and anyone who tells you otherwise is a smartass or trying to sell you something. so with no further ado, this post will be exactly what it sounds like so proceed at your own risk.

i'm going to focus less on style itself and more on approach. the first thing is that you don't need to divorce 'fluffy' non explicit intimacy from sexual writing. the exact same style and techniques you use for non sexual intimacy can often be applied to the sexual scenes too. kissing scenes, the chaste restrained touches filled with deeper desire, the linger looks from across the room, the build up to the first moments of vulnerability, the first few kisses, the first 'almosts' are connected to the sexual scenes themselves. it is all the same emotions and tensions. they're only heightened. and for sex scenes that are produced from these build ups are a simple escalation. you only need to expound upon what you've already built. don't view it as starting new and having to figure out how to write a different topic/moment. it's a continuation and all you need to do is use the tools you've already given yourself.

my second tip is to spend time shaping your character's tastes, kinks, turn ons and icks, their secret fantasies, their red lines they won't cross, their pleasure zones, the places they find attractive on others that they like to focus on and stimulate. if you want your sex scenes to feel real and not like it's just a emulation of generic smut or porn, you have to do what you do for literally anything else to make it not feel bland or contrived: character development.

where does your muse like to be kissed? what parts of their body make them feel stimulated, what parts are the most sensitive? not everything is about genitals. a lot of people like their foreplay to start with groping in varying erogenous zones. some are unconventional, some like their ears licked, they want their wrists kissed and sucked, they just want their partner to hold them close etc. the more you practice and explore what feels right for your character, the easier building on that foundation of tension will become.

if you feel awkward you can write the characters feeling awkward too because it often is. sex isn't always erotic or super steamy. it can be funny and awkward or just a natural physical thing happening between two people. focus less on if it sounds good in the first draft and focus more on if it makes sense for the characters, focus on how this moment makes them feel, where they feel their arousal and excitement in their body, how they respond to each other, what this means to them or what it doesn't mean etc. after you have gotten that down, then you edit it. add the prose, use the language that either make sit feel less crude to you or more erotic or more poetic etc.

lets take eliza and grabriella from last time so we can expound upon their previous interaction

it wasn't like she had never seen gabriella before. the first time they had seen each other outside of a dorm room or stuffy lecture hall was at dance club which was too crowded and too loud and was less 'dance' and more 'stand around and bob heads and take up too much space on the dance floor.' but she did remember what gabriella wore. she remembered her cropped blouse with ruffled sleeves and how she hadn't worn a bra beneath it. she remembered that she did dance. she remembered how effortless it looked. and the shorts which hugged her thighs and formed that little indentation that first made her wish she could tuck her fingers beneath the hemline and tug her close. she had denied those instincts then, those unrealized desires. but she wasn't denying it now. because now gabriella was on her mattress, sitting on her knees in only her bra and lacy underwear which evoked that same feeling. eliza imagined hooking a finger just at the waistline and tugging. butterflies swirled in her stomach and static radiated through her at the mere thought because this time she could do it. "you okay?" gabriella murmured. she was smiling. that smile made her feel all the warmth of the brightest stars which whispered she was meant to be here, with her. "yeah," eliza breathed out. she leaned closer and feathered her lips along the other woman's. even with a trembling hand she reached forth and brushed her fingertips at the edges of gabriella's panties. "i'm okay," she promised. she allowed herself to smile and in doing so realized she was already grinning. "more than okay." "good," gabriella kissed her back, one of her hands sliding into eliza's hair as the other tenderly began to caress her bare thigh. "have you ever...?"

"no," she admitted. heat gathered in her cheeks which were turning pinker by the second. her ears must have looked sunburnt and she had to resist the urge to cover her face. "not really...not like this." a pause. she bit at the inside of her lower lip and glanced up at gabriella's soft features. when their eyes met, she simultaneously felt all her muscles relax again. but those damn butterflies kept fluttering within her. "have you?" "once," gabriella nodded. then she smiled, a shyness in her expression which only made her features glow all the more. she reached down and gently grasped eliza's hand. she rubbed her thumb over her knuckles. "just follow my lead," she murmured. "we'll make up our own steps." she slowly guided eliza's fingers beneath the lacy waistband. and then further. until she felt the damp warmth between her thighs. eliza's breath hitched and she almost forgot how to control her lungs. "i think i can figure it out," she replied with a small smirk before she tenderly rubbed the pad of her thumb against gabriella's mound. when the other woman breathed in deep, almost moaning, she knew this was a dance she would happily memorize.

i put the rest below the cut to help the post from being too lengthy. but essentially here we see a continuation of eliza feeling uncertain in new territory but finding comfort and reassurance in gabriella. she might be nervous, but she has no doubts about this woman she's attracted to. rather than just describing one action after the other or focusing only on the biological responses happening, we're delving into the continuation of anticipation, we're showing the gentle push and pull between them. eliza has the desire to take control and give pleasure to gabriella. but she finds herself needing gabriella's guidance and that's okay.

because they met dancing, we can use dancing symbolism. deciding the contrasting language and euphemisms you want to use for your ship will help you broaden how you write the intimacy beyond the physical.

eliza wants to be more dominant we see hints of it here, but realistically someone who is new to a situation will not be able to go straight into that. but, say that there is continued scenes of intimacy between them, after the first time, we would start to let her slowly explore that. perhaps gabriella would coax it out of her, maybe eliza will surprise her. she'll tug her close by her belt loops, she let herself bite at her rather than just gentle kisses. it will happen slowly and surely. and that is typically also good advice for if you want to include more kinky content. the first time people have sex they're not gonna jump straight into that. even if they're experienced in kink they still have to get to know one another and get a feel for each other's bodies, what they do and don't like, etc.

there's further tension to explore if you utilize those intimate scenes correctly, continuing to build and escalate each time upon the previous moments. don't just jump straight to crazy sex. build up to it. let them explore each other and their sexuality together. that is where the steam comes from, the continuation of tension, the excitement of getting to know one another. don't just steamroll right over opportunities for development and sensuality.

anyway that's it folks bc this post is long af. have fun, write freaky shit, write cute shit, write what makes u happy and horny.

[queenofallimagines]

hi there!! may i ask some obey me hcs where mc is a professional volleyball player (like of they would watch her tems matchs, how they cheer and things like that) and has a personality like oikawa when she's not playing, but turn into a queen of the court (like kageyama 🕺) when playing? tysm!

A/n: I’m literally so mad I didn’t see this b4 bc I’m watching the haikyuu movie sobbing over karasuno VS nekoma😫 but absolutely! Also I noticed how this got more nsfw closer to the end😭 couldn’t help it😔

Lucifer:

- impressed

- He did think you had a nice body when he first saw you

- But then he hears your trying out for the RAD volleyball team?

- Poor human can’t stand on the same court against literal demons??

- Is what he thought

- He sees Beel ecstatic about your first game and he’s hyping you up sm

- Lucifer goes bc if you get heir he will step in to defend you

- Yk when hinata does his thing and the whole stadiums jaws drop?

- That’s WHAT HAPPENED HERE

- He sees you effortlessly setting to your teammates like you rly are running this show

- Made you captain at tryouts bc hell yeah!!

- They call you the demon Ruler of the court fr

- Imagine being so cocky and prideful and then getting home and being like all chill and regular chaotic

- He thinks your cheating real BAD

- He can’t play but he’s like nah okay against me you can use no spells

- Asmo is making cute merch to wear to your games

- Levi has already watched all your tapes form the human world he’s a expert and he’s never seen a volleyball before

- When you wipe the floor w him he’s like okay,,, maybe you are just that good

- That speed and serve is something dangerous

- When you get his pact he’s at EVERY game

- The way he can feel the pride running through you when you play, and the smirk on your face sends a chill up your spine when you look down on the other team

- He can and will have his hands all over you after a game

- Sorry like he’s euphoric the whole time it’s like edging almost

- Can’t deny how you look in your tight uniform is very appealing too

- Asmo too he can feel the lust for you in the room and he’s LOVING IT

- Brags whew he he gets the chance

Mammon:

- yeah he’s placing bets

- He comes to see you at practice because he skipped class and he knows if he shows up at home without you he’s in trouble

- So he does to idle around

- Jaw literally drops when he sees you obliterate the other side of the court

- Feels greed burning in him and can’t tell if it’s him or you

- The drive to win radiating off of you in waves

- It’s overwhelming

- “When we’re us g’unna tell me you can do THAT?!”

- “You never asked.”

- Lucifer feels a chill when mammon asks you if he can place bets on you winning

- Shows up to every game

- WILL oversee merch sales

- Has a jersey of yours he wears to sleep

- Runs the Stan page w asmo

- Will make sure your gear is in tip-top shape

- Brings you snacks before and after practice

- You think it’s all financially motivated and like 70% is but he’s like so happy and proud of you

- Right w Beel cheering the loudest at your games

- Nobody can even say anything bad bc he will argue them DOWN

- Buys all your jerseys and then saves all the tickets to your games

- Will show up w flowers

- Also sneaks from class to your practices bc he is a SUCKER for that volleyball shorts and knee pad combo

- Watches your games on replay

- Seems like the type to jack off to your games too

- Biggest hype man and will give you a ‘reward’ if you play extra hard during a game

Levi:

- he likes sports anime

- And probably will compete in a swimming event at some school festival bc duh

- But he hears Beel and mammon gushing over you play sports and is like okay well my Henry is so talented but whatever

- Almost died when you come home all sweaty and tired from practice like oop

- Suddenly binge watching every volleyball anime there IS

- Might as well be your coach

- Applies to be manager but like he’s one of the seven lord of hell lmao who’s gunna tell Levi no??

- Yall are kiyoko and Tanaka

- Very cute

- Also wearing merch w asmo they made

- Gets patches of your number to put on his everyday jacket

- Also wears your jersey to sleep

- ALSO ALSO a sucker for them volleyball fits

- Makes sure you’re always hydrated and the gym is the perfect temperature to play games in

- Guilty pleasure is that he really likes seeing you sweaty and panting

- Way how’s your games the way oikawa watches other teams to see how they play

- Actually good at making strategies and figuring out the letters in other teams

- Wants you to teach him to play

- Not bc he wants too but bc you’ll have to help adjust his posture and he can see you spike a lot

- Gets a thrill off of feeling the small bit of envy you feel when you see another good team or they manage to score on you

- Mayyyyyy encourage a little more envy bc you spike the ball even harder and you glare even more

- Yknow he has a thing for you to be mean

- So he’s like biting his lips hearing you trash talk the other team

- Also like mammon where he will have recordings of your games to jack off too

- “You pathetic worm know your place”

- He’s never moaned louder

Satan:

- reads books on Volleyball

- Likes to be wellread and can impress you with terms

- Hears Beel be excited and sneaks off to see you practice

- Slides in slick compliments

- He’s cheeky to a fault

- “I have to ask, do you like volleyball for the adrenaline or is it for the cute outfit?”

- Tease him because he’s not even good at hiding that he’s looking

- “I don’t know. So you like coming to my games to watch me win or stare at my ass?”

- The cat was too stunned to speak

- Chose to come to your games because he was at home alone while everyone else was at your game

- And he was doing some ‘Self Care’

- And he got this lighting bolt of please up his spine

- Needless to say he made quite of a mess

- Hears everyone hyping you up when they come back

- “Remind me to never make ya mad okay MC?”

- “I would!~ the way they were glaring after they slammed the ball down made my heart flutter.”

- Had to go see what the fuss was for himself

- The grunts and yells are really making him hot under the collar

- Used your game tickets as bookmarks

- It makes him smile

- He’s such a tween girl in love he’ll like decorate them in his spare time like maybe press flowers and glue them on encasing it all in resin

- Heart eyes

- Giggles at your trash talk

- Loves seeing you fr have beef w people

- Setters for some reason always have beef during a game idk WHAT IT IS but like they all was glaring daggers

- He’s deeply interested in the setter beef

- “So what’s the story with you and that other setter👀 I could feel a little tension in the air.”

- My hc is that his pact mark is always on your dominant fist

- Bc like yknow punching

- So he feels the sting of your hand when you hit the ball and he rly likes it

- Will offer to massage you after a game when you’re all tired

- An excuse to get nasty and he will spank you w the same hand

- Sigh he can’t help himself unfortunately

Asmo:

- Oh he’s hype

- He’s not one for playing sports

- Buuuuut he does like the appeal of the slutty outfits and seeing people be all aggressive and sweaty

- So when he hears Beel mention you’re tying out for the team he’s immediately intrigued

- He’s probably an honesty cheerleader

- So he’s going to be there dressed to the 9 in YOUR colors every game

- Like not the school colors he’s dripped out in your signature color schemes

- Even somehow gets ahold of an old jersey from the human world and rules it in many outfits

- Brags to people that he has one and it’s signed(pls sign it for him)

- Wears earrings w your number and name on it

- That trope where the head cheerleader kisses the star player bc they’re dating after the game is very him

- Puts in his cutest lipgloss and kisses your cheek

- “Well if it’s you I don’t mind getting all sweaty and out of breath with you~”

- Like I said before he’s feeling off the lust for you in the air

- The lust his brothers feel, the audience, your lust for winning

- He’s intoxicated by it

- He feels his pact mark pulsing and it makes him giggle

- You’d think he’s tickled pink

- But he’s laughing bc he’s about to go crazy after this mf game

- Is hyper focus on how your outfit stretches over you when you move

- Watches you work out

- Bc like let’s be real he’s down to mess round in the gym showers

- Another one to give you a nice ‘Reward’ for playing so well

- Has all these suspiciously seductive pictures of you playing like when did he even take this picture of you bending over??

- Can’t help but to let his hands wander

- Instead of having a jersey to sleep in he will sleep in your whole uniform

- Like you’re looking for it in the morning to go to practice and he’s sleeping in it

- “Well not it smells like me!”

- Sigh

- Well want to get nasty in it but he’s torn between you in it or him in it

- Hardest decision in your life

- Asmo and Levi decked out in your merch and Levi stalks the Stan pages for the best pictures and asmo runs like 3 of em

Beel:

- my beautiful beloved!

- You come meet him at fangol practice and ask him if they have any other sports

- He mentions offhandedly that the volleyball team is doing tryouts for the new season and you’re like 👀 bet let’s see how yall play

- Comes with you to make sure you don’t get like picked on or anything

- Amazed by seeing what you can do and how confident you get

- Went from like shy brand new human to being the demon ruler of the court he’s so hyped

- “MC where did you learn to do that??”

- “Hard work and a lot of spite✨”

- If anyone got something to say no tf they don’t bc he’s your bodyguard

- Makes sure your games aren’t scheduled at the same time bc he’s not missing your games

- Enjoying your games when he feels a familiar feeling of hunger

- He heard all the other brothers talking about their pact marks feeling funny but he’s like meh

- Starts thinking that maybe you didn’t eat enough before the game

- But when he sees you smiling as your team wins he understands

- That gluttony you feel isn’t towards food but volleyball

- Huh. Interesting

- Not one to immediately get nasty after a game he will want to treat you to snacks first but he mayyyy want to help you get charged after practice

- I mean like you’re exhausted and your muscles are all sore like it’s totally innocent!!

- Wears your jersey number as a patch on his jacket

- But also would have a cute necklace w the number on it like right along w his gold chain

- Whew

- Dangles over your face when he fucks you

- He’s glad you both can workout together 🥰

Belphegor:

- sleepy

- Not really interested in sports

- But he goes to heels games to cheer him on

- Beel drags him to a game of yours

- Likes how hot you look playing

- Like Satan will make comments about the outfit

- “Are you sure the shorts are supposed to be that short?”

- “They don’t restrict my movement”

- “Hm…. Good to know.”

- Another who steals your jersey and sleeps in it

- Might put it over a pillow to sleep on

- Lazily wants to hold you after a game night

- “Mmmm just rest, you’ve done so much moving around relax with me.”

- Sweeps you into sweet dreams whether you want to sleep or not

- Will have his own wet dreams about you in your outfit

- Will go to the game and cheer with asmo to hype you up

- Likes seeing you set the ball to your teammates and how you can read their minds and direct the game

[mer-acle]

Do you have any athena hcs?

Uhhh

How much time do you have lol

I'll try to list the short ones so this post doesn't get too long. Due to writing about her a lot I have a lot of lore lmao

1. Athena is the eldest child (Hephaestus born shortly after her). Nobody who's spoken to her once would expect anything else honestly

2. At the time of the Odyssey she's about 4000 years old (No reason or proof I just decided) Her first 200 years give or take were spent with Triton (read: Pallas)

3. She only got assigned with Warfare as her domain after officially joining Olympus

4. Her emotional distance with her siblings is partly due to Pallas trauma, and partly due to Zeus liking to "keep her to himself" (read: isolated as the favorite). She gets along best with Hermes and Hephaestus (yes, I refuse to accept Erechtonius happened) bc the former is just as chaotic as herself and the latter shares her creativity and both don't ask for a big commitment from her (again. No Erechtonius and no arranged marriages in my plotline let me have this)

5. Dislikes being touched. Her siblings learn to accept it, Zeus does not. She doesn't try to enforce it with him. (Yes in every iteration of her that I will ever write, there will be a touch-starved to hug plotline sue me. I need therapy)

6. Never braids her hair. She used to have braids when with Pallas, but since then she has never worn her hair this way again. She also wears it quite a bit shorter than she used to back then.

7. Her grey eyes are inherited from Métis. They also glow in the dark. She has perfect night vision.

8. Perfect memory. Also she has bird's eye view versions of even her own memories (hc that one of her domains is history so that's why) It's how she found out that Zeus interfered with Pallas's death.

9. Used to have an Oceanic themed armor before joining Olympus (Métis made it for her) She allows Hephaestus to make her a new one, shedding the Ocean symbols in an effort to please Zeus.

10. Connected to her status as a virgin goddess but in contrast to Artemis, Athena dresses pretty covered up, doesn't undress even for bathing (in ancient Greece sometimes you'd keep your chiton on as a sort of bathing suit almost, but being naked was more common) (also this is not 'purity' stuff btw I just get that vibe from her, Artemis, literally go off queen you're doing great)

11. Classic but good, cocks her head like an owl like all the time. Also says "hmm" a lot (intonation may vary)

12. (Remember, my hc, you can do whatever you like) I think all the virgin goddesses are acespec/arospec in some capacity, but Athena is the cut and dry aro/ace/repulsed one. Like... It's a big fat no from her (I'm projecting hard btw)

Anyway twelve seems like a good number I hope you like them :) I picked those that aren't specific to Epic and can be applied to myth!Athena too

[shegetsburned]

being in a relationship w. hakari kinji ᥫ᭡

hakari calls you often to let you know of his whereabouts and to know where you are.

I feel like kinji’s a "my girlfriend can wear whatever she wants because I can fight" kind of guy, mixed with "you’re just staring and I’m hittin' that"

he probably lets you do whatever the hell you want.

making small hand gestures for you to come sit on his lap while he’s busy.

he’d probably tell you to stfu if you ever doubted yourself or you guys’ relationship because he firmly believes nothing can come between you two.

hakari will randomly pull you closer to him, holding your head up and kissing you.

100% applies the sidewalk rule.

he literally takes up the whole bed and you’re fighting for your life with the weight of his body almost crushing you.

hakari is so dominant in a non-sexual way, I swear; he’d put his hand on your back to lead you, and he’d say no in a stern but caring way, telling you to "come here" when he wants you.

the man knows how to hold eye contact, he never leaves your gaze and knows what it does to you.

he’s so close to you all the time, only inches away from your face when he speaks to you, of course, he’s taller, which makes him bend down most of the time.

palm kisses?!?!?

I feel like you’d be able to have a mature and stable relationship with kinji. he’d ask you upfront if you were upset about something he did, and correct it immediately. you guys wouldn’t hide how you feel to each other, because he doesn’t have time to play around the problem. he’s pretty assertive.

you don’t have to ask even once for him to either distance himself from another girl, or when you see someone being too flirty with him. he knows it and has no interest in them whatsoever.

kinji’s faithful. between managing his fight club and spending time with you, he doesn’t have much time to think about anything else.

he may come off as rude at first, but you quickly learn he has a kind heart and will never let you give up on any dreams that you might have, pushing you to achieve them. he’ll even help you, making sure you’re not discouraged.

kinji saw this fever in you, and won’t let you go, ever since. you’re stuck with him. ♡

© shegetsburned 2023. Please do not repost/edit/or claim my writing as your own.

[toomuchracket]

constellations (literal d word (dad) matty x reader fluff)

you have an eight year old who loves space. let's redecorate her bedroom! promptober day 18. enjoy <3

you're applying your moisturiser when matty pads back into the bedroom; he drops a kiss to the top of your head, and you smile. “babies asleep?”

“yeah. alex took a while to get there… oi, stop that!” he grumbles when you stand, smearing the excess lotion from the back of your hand across his face.

“what? it's cold outside. it dries your skin out. you needed that,” you softly kiss his neck, wrapping your arms around his waist. “anyway, you were saying al took a while to fall asleep?”

“not ages. but we had to do two stories.”

you squint at your husband. “what was the first one?”

“llama llama red pyjama.”

“did you do the voices? and the noises?”

“obviously, babe.”

“matty,” you groan into his shoulder. “of course he took ages to fall asleep, you got him all hyped up.”

he sighs. “can't help it. i just love the sound of his laugh,” he hugs you tighter. “same as yours, you know.”

“thank god he got something from me.”

matty giggles, pulling back to kiss you quickly. “stop pouting,” he pulls his t-shirt over his head, and suddenly you're more than willing to listen to everything he says. “they both got your brains, darling. actually, lyla was just- oh,” he smirks when you remove your dressing gown, body bare aside from a black thong. “hi.”

rolling your eyes, you reach for the t-shirt he just discarded and pull it over your own head, before climbing into bed and burrowing under the covers; it doesn't stop him from giving you the eyes, though. but you won't be swayed. “you were saying?”

“hmmm? oh, yeah. our daughter,” matty kicks his sweatpants off - you glare at him as he does, and he rolls his eyes and neatly folds them - and climbs in beside you. almost instinctively, you move to lie on his chest, kissing his tattoo softly before turning your head to look up at your husband. he smiles adoringly down at you, gently stroking your hair. “she's so fucking smart. you know how they're learning about space at school?”

“mhmm.”

“she listed all the planets to me and all the moons of neptune. in descending order of how close they were to the planet,” matty shakes his head. “she's eight.”

you smile. “our genius girl.”

“she's gonna ask you about stars and constellations tomorrow, by the way.”

“me? why?”

“because she asked me and i said i didn't know anything, and then she did that thinking face where she really, really looks like you and said ‘i'll talk to mum about it. she'll know.’”

“what gave her that idea?”

“dunno. maybe your tattoos,” he runs his arm over the three tiny constellations inked on your upper arm, representing his and both your babies’ star signs. “or maybe she just thinks i'm an idiot.”

you smirk. “probably that.”

“oh, shut up,” he goes to flick your nose, but you catch his index finger gently between your teeth before he can; because you can't help yourself, you wrap your lips around the digit, and matty’s pupils dilate. “don't start something you won't finish, princess.”

okay, maybe you will be swayed.

looking doe-eyed at your husband, you release his finger with an audible pop, shuffling to sit properly on his lap. “if you finish inside me, does it count?”

“fuck,” matty groans; suddenly, you're underneath him, your neck being attacked by kisses. “think you can keep quiet enough?”

“yes, daddy.”

“good girl.”

***

“well, that's not right.”

matty grits his teeth, holding onto the top of the ladder and looking down at his daughter, whose curly head is buried in an astronomy book from the local library that's almost as big as she is. “again?”

you peer over lyla's head, looking at the page and the bedroom ceiling and back to the page again. “not right at all.”

“fantastic,” he wipes the sweat from his forehead. “which star is the most wrong?”

lyla shoves her glasses up her nose and opens her mouth; matty cuts her off. “i don't know their official names, remember - is it the big one that's the issue, or the smaller ones?”

she tilts her head in a way so reminiscent of matty that you have to bite back a giggle. “that little one to your left, dad.”

“‘kay. and where should it be?”

“further left, and down. like, a little bit down. not too much.”

he nods, carefully peeling the adhesive stars from the ceiling and rearranging them as per lyla's instructions. “alex?”

your son looks up from his comic book. “yeah, dad?”

“go and look at your sister’s book and tell me if this looks right. i need an objective opinion.”

he obliges, carefully placing his book on the bed before wandering over. you roll your eyes. “really, matthew?”

“yes, really,” matty twists, face screwing into a grimace as he stretches the twinge-y muscle in his back. “you girls are perfectionists. al keeps it real,” at that, lyla scowls up at her dad, and he backtracks immediately, face softening. “and that's not a bad thing, munchkin, not at all. it's just… well, there are limits to how accurate we can get everything in here, yeah? sometimes we have to compromise our artistic vision. s'just a sad fact of life.”

you scoff. “and when have you ever compromised on your artistic vision?”

“when you've told me to.”

“alright, i'll give you that one,” you raise your eyebrows, nodding slowly. “so, al - has dad got this one right?”

“hmm,” alex frowns at the page, his brows creasing cutely just like his dad's, then scrutinises the ceiling; his face drops into placidity, and he nods. “i think so.”

“thanks, mate,” matty reaches down to ruffle your son's curly head (only wincing slightly on the way back up), before sighing and smiling sheepishly at your daughter. “lyla? what are your thoughts, darling?”

she readjusts her glasses, and the rest of you wait with baited breath; there's a collective exhale when she grins. “looks good, dad. thanks.”

he beams. “you're welcome, munchkin. now,” he steps a rung down the ladder. “lunchtime?”

you shake your head. “there's still one more, babe.”

“god, really?” matty sighs, pressing his head into the handle at the top of the ladder. “feels like we've been doing this for hours.”

“well, what's one more, then? come on,” you gently tap his denim-covered ass, at which the kids giggle. “you did agree to this, matty.”

“yeah, when i wasn't of sound mind.”

(read: the morning after your late-night lovemaking session a couple of nights ago, the ending of which left your husband extremely chipper and thus agreeable to your suggestion that he stick glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling of your space-daft daughter's room.)

you smirk. “some would argue that's the most sound a mind can be. a certain… clarity to it, no?”

matty shoots you a familiar look, a wordless warning that you're at risk of pushing it too far and getting into trouble if you don't stop now, and you can't deny that it's thrilling; not even a second later, he's switching back into dad mode, gentle and pragmatic with your babies in a way that's almost as sexy as the dominant look you just got. “alright. what is the final constellation, then?”

“s'my birthday one,” lyla beams, moving to snuggle into you. “me and mummy are gonna match!”

“oh,” matty's eyes and voice are as tender as you've ever known them to be - the sweet smile he follows with is even more so. “m'sorry for complaining, darlings, this is very important. alex, would you pass me the… yes, thank you, munchkin,” the final set of stars in hand, he beams at you again. “i reckon i can do this one without guidance, i think. can i try?”

you nod, smiling just as tenderly as your husband. “of course.”

and he does, perfectly placing the stars on the ceiling in the pattern he's known by heart for the past seven years, the pattern he watched you get permanently etched onto your arm while he held the tiny baby girl it was dedicated to. unlike last time, she's awake and alert enough to watch the pattern form, looking up at the ceiling and her father with a beaming smile on her adorable face and her arm around her little brother; something about it all has tears pricking at the corners of your eyes, total love for your family and gratitude for how wonderful your life is both threatening to overwhelm you. 

matty seems to notice - when he's finished the constellations, and safely on solid ground again, one of his arms finds its way around your waist and his lips meet your temple. “love you, darling,” he murmurs, as you watch your kids look awestruck at the stars above them. “thank you.”

“for what?”

he nods towards lyla and alex. “them. convincing me to do this. our life, really,” he squeezes your waist. “s'perfect.”

you sniffle. “so are the constellations. really, matty,” you kiss his shoulder. “they're amazing, baby. i love them. and you, of course!”

matty giggles. “kids?” he calls; two little curly heads bounce over to you in response. “what do we think of the stars, then?”

alex is enthusiastic, hair all but flipping as he nods. “they're so cool!” 

lyla's a bit more measured in her response, but her excitement shines through in the way she throws herself at matty to hug him. “i love them, dad. thank you,” she giggles when he kisses her cheek, reaching for you so she can coordinate a group hug. “we match now, mum.”

“we do, darling, you're right,” you hug your kids in tighter. “i love you, my babies. you too, matty.”

“i love you, too,” he laughs. “can we genuinely get lunch now, though? m'starving. that was hard work, that.”

you laugh softly. “yeah. go on, babies, go and get a fruit shoot,” they oblige, and once they're safely out of earshot you wrap your arms around matty's shoulders. “for all the effort you put in today… you can eat me before we go to sleep tonight, if you want.”

he hums happily, leaning down to kiss you until you're dizzy. “never wanted anything more.”

[chr1sfilmed]

involves: drinking, drugs, smut, cock riding, choking, harsh name calling.

summary: you and your friend meet chris and matt at a party and are talking until he takes you to a roof to smoke..

not proof read!!

“i don’t know if i wanna go, i look awful,” you say as you smoothed your hands down your halloween costume , “shut the fuck up you look gorgeous!” your bsf almost shouts.

you’ve been in a shitty mood since you and your bf had been having arguments recently and even one over the halloween party your meant to be going to tonight.

“okay fine, you’ve persuaded me.” you raise your hands in defeat before applying a layer on red lipstick.

“thank you!” you say as you hand the uber driver a tip before shuffling yourself out the car trying not to show anything.

you and your best friend walk up to the gate and get hit with the smell of weed and sweaty teenagers, “what the fuck,” your bsf says as you both watch people throw up in the yard.

yous turn to look at eachother as you both walk into the house, the living room was CROWDED, you held on to her hand as she dragged you through the mingling people until you hit the ‘bar’ for the night.

the man stood behind the island pours you both out shots, yous throw them back, shaking your head as it hits your throat.

as yous take a few more, two men sit on the chairs next to yous, as you lean and peak over your bsf you realise how much they look alike, almost even twins?

your best friend does the loudest whisper in the world - “PSSSTTT.. look at him, he is so fineeee,” you nod as you listen to her drunken slurrs, the men look at eachother and start laughing hysterically, “what’s funny??” you slur.

one of the ‘twins?’ look at you before smirking and turning away as they both begin whispering.

one of them begins talking to your bsf then stands up and grabs your bestfriends hand before lifting her off the chair and taking her to a door in the house then walking in.

“where’s he taking her?” you ask worried, “m’ don’t worry she’ll be fine,” he mumbles as he pulls out a joint, shuffling closer to your chair.

you smack his hand, “you shouldn’ be smoking that in front of people!” you say harshly as if you were telling him off, a rough laugh falls from his mouth as he moves his empty hand onto your thigh.

“m’ don’t think so, not gonna let anyone snitch sweetheart,” he says, as his hand strokes your inner thigh.

he grabs your wrist as he drags you off the chair, “hey what are you doing!” you drunkenly slur in an angered voice.

“don’t worry, jus’ going for a smoke and your gonna come,” (literally) he takes you to a bedroom, when he opens the window wide open and hops out of it, the blunt between his fingers as he helps you get through it.

you hold his shoulders as he lifts you through the window, he takes a seat near the edge of the roof as you follow his movements taking a seat right next to him, crossing your arms around you legs trying to get comfy on this awfully slanted roof.

“soo what’s your name?” you question, “chris, yours?” you tell him your name as he looks at you head to toe before lighting the joint and putting it to his lips.

you watch as his lips purse around the tip of the joint, it shrinking as he takes more and more hits of it, “you want some?” he asks with a sly smile, you nod as he puts it to your lips and you suck in as the smoke engulfs your lungs.

you take a few more hits until the joint is on its last leg as he dabs it on the roof and throws it off.

“so are you like..a twin?” you ask him as he tells you he’s actually a triplet, the weed slowly begins kicking in as you become more giggly with him as you ask him questions about himself.

yous begin moving closer as he pulls you in by your waist and presses his lips to yours, dragging your body onto his lap, his legs lay astray in between her spread legs.

you begin grinding on his jeans, “m’ chris..” a moan leaves your lips before you bite your bottom lip silencing the whimpers eventually withdrawing.

“les go inside baby,” he says as he grabs your waist and lifts you up as your legs wrap around his waist.

he hoists you up to the window helping you get though, as he follows you through before he gropes your ass kneading the soft, plump flesh.

he throws you to the bed next to the window whilst he tosses his shirt into the corner of this random bedroom.

he lowers his body to the bed before shuffling the skirt hanging on your hips down, “such a fucking slut, wet already baby,” he says as his fingers swipe your folds before he reaches his hand up and sticks his fingers in your mouth with no warning.

the bitter sweet tang of your arousal dissipated in your throat whilst chris is removing your panties completely.

he looks into your swollen vulva before he puts a hand on each thigh spreading your legs further apart.

your staring at the ceiling leaning on your forearm and elbows until you feel chris’s nose hit your clit, launching you from your day dream.

his tongue circles your sensitive bud as one of his hands shuffles across your stomach and under the knitted sweater laying along your chest.

his hand begins to massage your breast as you let out moans until he squeezes your pebbled nipple, “shh be quiet,” he bites.

his other hand moves from the side of you until it hits your mouth, him motioning for you to open your mouth.

he sticks his fingers in wetting them as much as possible before he pulls them out, a small pop exploding as he inserts a digit into your arousal soaken vagina.

strings of moans shot out your throat as you begin grinding against his tongue, almost as if your humping his fingers.

as he feels you clench around his fingers, he pulls them out dramatically, the knot swallowing itself as the disappointment fills your body.

“wtaf chris??” you say with an angered tone, “ride me like the whore you are,” chris blurts out.

it takes you a second to adjust your body in the perfect position above his girthy cock before his grip on your hips shove you down making you sink down on it.

“take your top off fo’ me you slut,” he says before you tug at your collar, pulling it off with one hand as the other was spread wide on his chest as support.

your tits fall perfectly, the curves of your body shone in the moonlight through the window.

chris’s hands move from your hips to the curve of your waist, kneading at your soft skin.

you begin to bounce on his cock as chris bottoms out, his dick hitting the soft plump spot in your vagina.

your legs begin giving in, your riding getting slower and more jittered, so as a result your body gets flipped so chris is at the top and now the one thrusting into you.

his pace quickens as his hand begins moving towards your throat, “take my..fuck..d-dick,”

whimpers fall from your mouth as chris tightens his grip on your neck.

the knot in your stomach tightens as chris removes his hand and plants his palm on your clit, your wetness helping his hand glide smoothly to stimulate your clit.

“m’ gonna c-cum ch..chris,” you mumble out, “cum on my cock you whore,” he says clenching his teeth trying to hold in all the groans he could’ve been letting out.

your vision goes white as chris thrusts speed up, your orgasm hits harder than ever, your legs shaking and the heaviest of moans exploding from your mouth.

as your ride out your orgasm, chris keeps going doing the same thing as he rubs your clit even harder, “t-too much..p-please ‘its too m-much!” you squeal out, your vision fading going black every few seconds.

“take my fucking dick, m’ fucking slut!” he says as you finally explode and squirt all over his dick, this being the final straw for him and he finally pumps his load into your pussy.

his body falls closer to yours as he begins sucking on your tits, his cock twitching inside you as your pussy clenches around his dick.

“did so fuckin’ good,” he says as his hand strokes your hair.

after a few minutes, you feel the pressure release as he pulls out of your sore hole and stands back up before pulling his jeans up and sliding his top back on as you laid there bare to him.

you nervously wait for him to say something before he leaves the room closing the door behind him.

you sit there as a wave of sadness hits you, until he comes back with a wet rag and begins cleaning you up, the coldness shocking your numb pussy.

“mm’ all clean now,” he says before leaning in for a kiss whilst playing with your tits.

he plants a smack to your ass before standing back up and getting your skirt from the floor and handing it to you.

you slide your skirt back on as the sting of the smack hits you, reminding you of your panties.

“uh, chris?” you ask confused, “mhm?” he says as he begins lighting another joint.

“uhm..where is my underwear?” he pulls them out his pocket before stuffing them back in, “can you uh, give them back to me please?” you mumble nervously.

he shakes his head before handing you the joint, sliding your jumper back on to the upper half of your body.

as he puts your arms in he whispers in your ear, “walk around this party, not only with your little friend, but with my seed dripping from your pussy like the slut you are.”

your face drops as you try and see his face to see if hes kidding, he’s definitely not.

you sit up and slide your boots back on before standing up and the discomfort of his dripping cum hits you.

he smirks as he watches your face scrunch before taking a hit of the joint and passing it to you, after you pass it back he grabs onto your hand and drags you to the door of the room before opening it and going down the stairs.

you and chris see your bestfriend with chris’s twin brother sat at the bar again.

chris drags you by your hand over to where they are sat as chris takes a seat next to them and then places you onto one of his legs.

“heyyy,” your bsf slurs, she’s sat on the counter as chris’s twin massages her shaky legs.

“oh uh i forgot to get your name?” you say to his twin, “it’s matt, and i already know yours because we were just talking about you,” he says as he looks up to your bestfriend.

“about me? what?” you say before matt replies with, “we were talking about how longgg you’d were taking,” chris looks down at you as matt says this, watching a blush coat your face.

matt and your bestfriend leave again to go to the bathroom as she was feeling sick and he was obviously going to have to hold her hair for her.

“soo, can i have your number or what?” chris questions, in which you reply with a nod and a giggle.

𓂃 ࣪˖ : a/n : one of my firsts!!

[tomsvouge]

Call it what you want

Summary- You and Joe attend his Heisman ceremony. What you don’t know is that Joe has something up his sleeve for after the ceremony. Warnings: Fluff, References of sex

Being friends with Joe was a reward in itself, but seeing him achieve a goal of a lifetime is worth more than any award there is.

Getting ready in the hotel room in New York City was not on your bucket list for 2019 but hey I was not complaining. Joe was up for the heisman trophy and you could not be more proud of him. Knowing what he has endured up to this moment would make anyone have nothing but respect for him.

Joe and I have been friends since middle school. All I remember is a shy kid hesitant to find a seat somewhere. Calling him over to sit next to me was the best decision I have ever made. Although what I didn't know was I was going to be falling for him as the years went on. each day that went by I always noticed something new about him, like the way he gets all giggly when talking about things he loves, or when he gets tuned vision when he is really really focused on something.

Having these feelings for Joe meant that every little thing made me jealous. Like when girls fond over him or when girls literally come up to him and flirt with him. Before my thoughts took over me I got pulled out by Joe calling my name.

"Y/n!"-Joe

"yea what's up"- you say sitting down the makeup brush.

"Which tie should I pick?"- Joe says holding up two purple ties that look almost identical

"Go with the one without the gold it kinda washes you out"- You say taking the tie from him to put it on him while he laughs at your remark.

"Can't even catch a break on my day huh?"- Joe says shaking his head laughing.

"Hey just because your winning an award doesn't change the fact that your still easy to make fun of."- You say while fixing him up so he looks put together.

"There you go. Nice and proper."- you walking back to finish your makeup

"Thanks and I haven't won anything yet, I'm just a nominee."-Joe says following you and sitting down on the bed next to the vanity watching you apply the finishing touches.

"Oh c'mon, Joe we all know you have this award in the bag. You have had heck of a season and most of all you deserve it more than anyone."- you say turning to him and grabbing his hands.

"Everyone believes in you Joe not just your family. You pretty much have the whole state of Louisiana supporting you tonight as you are their adopted son apparently."-you say as Joe looks up and laughs at the adoption joke.

"Thank you y/n. You always know how to bring my confidence back up."- Joe says looking at you with a little glimmer in his eyes.

"Oh! also can you help me zip up my dress?"-you ask standing up and turning around so my back faces him.

"Yea sure."-Joe says slowly zipping the dress up.

"There. And thank you for always being there, it means a lot."-Joe says while you turn around to look at him.

When turning around you had no idea how close you actually were to Joe, so close that your chest was literal centimeters away from his.

Looking into Joe's eyes gave you a wash of euphoria. Something hat only his can do, and he felt the same way about yours. Every stolen glance he takes at you when you aren't looking and every little gesture he does to show that he cares.

As you guys stared into each others eyes, it was cut short by Robin and Jimmy clearing their throats.

"Time to go guys!"- Robin says as she looks at us smirking.

"Yea okay."- we both say at the same time while they leave the room.

"Wait! Joe before we go gets take a picture."-You say opening the camera app and taking the picture,

"okay lets go y/n, this could turn into a whole photoshoot with you."-joe says laughing and guiding me to the door.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Walking into the ceremony felt unreal. Before it started we talked to a couple of joes coaches and other nominees.

A few minutes into small taking we were told the ceremony would be broadcasting in a ew minutes and we had to take our seats. before I went to my seat I decided to give Joe some more words of encouragement.

"Hey Joe just remember what I told you in the hotel room, you have all the support in the world right now, win or lose we're so so proud of you."-you say as he was staring u at you with admiration in his eyes.

"Thank you y/n."- He says with a tight lipped smile.

I could tell he was nervous. Joe only smiled like that when he was nervous or when he wanted out of a situation and didn't want to make it awkward.

As I'm walking back to my seat I couldn't help but over hear one of the nominees say that Joe had a good one. Before I could hear joes response people were starting to scramble to their seats for it to start.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He did it. He won the Heisman for LSU.

As walks up to his family section he hugs each of us. When he gets to me he says something unexpected.

"I love you.."- Joe says as he hugs you and moves on to his dad.

He just told me he loves me. We have said this to each other before but something about this time felt different.

As Joe walks up to give his speech all I could do is tear up. This boy has been through so much and has been knocked down so many times and the is finally proving all those people wrong who ever doubted him in his life.

But one thing that I did not expect to see was Joe cry. I have only seen Joe cry a few times, so little that I could count on one hand. This had really meant a lot to him and you couldn't be any prouder of him.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the ceremony and the walk in Times Square, Joe and I decided to head back to our room to celebrate the win by watching movies and drinking some champagne.

The second the door closed I tackled Joe in a hug to the point where he fell back on the bed. Laughing he quickly turned us over on the be. As quickly as he turned us over he jumped off of me.

"Sorry I don't know what I was thinking doing that"- Joe said as he starts to take off his shoes.

"Its fine, You did nothing wrong."- you said

"Im gonna go take a shower right quick, okay?"- you said walking over to the bathroom.

"Okay I'm going to my parents room to do the same."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sitting in the bed with Joe you had laughs and mini tickle fights. But as the night went on you had not idea what was about to happen.

"Okay so now that this movie is over I would like to show you a very important video."-joe says grabbing his computer.

"It's not a sex tape is it?"- you say with semi seriousness.

"No no not even close!"-Joe says laughing at you.

"Oh okay."- you say getting comfortable to see what his is about to show you.

"okay, watch"- Joe says starting the video.

The video consisted of memories of me and Joe from when we first met to literally a few hours ago.

"Joe that was so sweet, but why?"-you say looking at him.

"Y/n, you have been in my life since I can remember. Not a single bad memory with you, if anything you make the bad memories seen not so bad. You have been there for me through the really highs but you have also been there for me when I've hit rock bottom. You make me a better person and I'm grateful to have you as a best friend. And I know this might sound weird but I really don't want to be friends with you anymore. I want to be more than friends. So, with that Will you be my girlfriend?"- Joe says as you have tears in your eyes.

Joe... You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to say that sentence to me."-I say hugging him like my like depended on it.

"So I'll take that as a yes?"- Joe says

"Yes Joe i'll be your girlfriend."- I say leaning in to kiss his lips.

Right as our lips are about to touch Joe pulls away leaving me confused.

"What's wrong?"- You ask looking at him.

"Nothing, but before I forget I have to give you something."- Joe says reaching into the nightstand.

"Here."- he hands me the box

"Joe you didn't have to get me anything."

"Just open the box baby"

I open the box and see a pendant necklace with a "J" on it.

"joey... Its beautiful."

"Just like you. I wanted you to have it even when we are not physically with each other. Look inside."

I look inside and see a photo of me and Joe on the day we met and and an empty side. "What's this side for?"- I say referring to the empty side.

"It's for you to fill, I want you to fill it with your favorite memory of us. I doesn't have to be right now. You don't even have to tell me. just do it when you're ready."- Joe says as I nod.

"Can you put it on me?"-You say turning round.

"Ofc."- He says putting the necklace on me.

"oh and Joe?"

"Yea?"

"I love you too."- I say smiling.

Little did Joe know you filled that empty spot years later with the photo of you him and your baby boy the day you gave birth.

The first pic of the new year!!! Also the start of the Taylor imagines. If you have any recommendations let me know. <3

[alexlesuagz]

OKAY RANDOM SHORT RANT/HOT TAKE but am I the only one who thinks that the way certain members of the CC fandom treat the Asian women characters in CC is just…racist???

Like, either it’s fetishy or just plain hatred because they refuse to read between the lines bro

(S3 AND S5 SPOILERS HERE)

LIKE WITH ZOE KUSAMA FOR EXAMPLE, that woman was the CATALYST for like HALF of the plot of S5, and people constantly treat her as if she’s a weak-willed whelp who cries a lot and depends on Jones for everything like NO????? SHE LITERALLY CARRIED THE PLOT ON HER FUCKING BACK

And portraying her as just some “porcelain doll” is just pushing some REALLY fucking harmful stereotypes about Asian women, especially because the main reason I’ve seen people say that she’s like this is because she’s a traumatized woman that NEEDS HELP.

I remember once someone said that she did nothing helpful for the plot and was just a burden to everyone else and I legit had to take a walk around my room bro, that was genuinely a nightmare to read

“She’s weak!!” And she kills a grown man with a fucking rock. Apparently in order to not be deemed ‘weak’, she can’t show a HINT of vulnerability.

AND DON’T GET ME STARTED ON THE AMOUNT OF PEOPLE THAT JUST CALL ANGELA A “BITCH” BECAUSE OF EVERYTHING SHE DOES. DEAR FUCKING GOD. LITERALLY ANYTHING SHE DOES AT THIS POINT PEOPLE JUST DEMONIZE HER FOR, AS IF SHE ISN’T A LITERAL SOMBRA TRAINEE THAT WAS RAISED TO DETACH HER ACTIONS FROM HER EMOTIONS LIKE THIS???

TL;DR — This was mostly about Zoe but this applies to almost all the major characters in CC who are Asian women — the microaggressive way people treat them is PISSING ME OFF and pushing so many harmful tropes it’s insane.

Just to clarify, it’s fine if you don’t like them- this is just something I’ve noticed in this fandom, and it’s a PATTERN.

[punkeropercyjackson]

Genuine advice for people who joined the Batfam fandom because of fan content and are too scared to get into actual comics or not sure where to start:Please don't buy a single word 'Fuck canon!' people tell you about ANY Batfam member and i do mean ANY.They're lying to you to get you to sanatize them and deprive you of deserving to know what they're actually like because their peabrains can't process multilayered characters and relathionships in favor of bigoted stereotypes and writing that's insanely insulting to them and if you're a minor especially,they're lying to you about whatever they say about shipping the male members with eachother not being in*cest or ped0 too-Bruce has been Dick's adoptive dad since Dick's debut issue,he legally adopted Jason and Duke too,Damian's his bio kid and with Tim it's a bit more complicated but it's very much canon that they see eachother as father and son and Tim has lived at Wayne Manor at several points in canon and would be brothers regardless of anything else due to this but they also use that exact word to describe their dynamic and so does everybody else

This applies to Cass being their sister too because Bruce adopted her after they formed a dad-daughter bond a while into her being Batgirl but as Stephanie has a mom she lives with and has never seen Bruce as a parental figure nor he her as one of his kids,you're freegame to ship her with Tim or Cass and in fact i highly encourage doing both.Batfanon stans are once again doing mass lying(damn they should get a different hobby)by saying the four male Robins are the 'core' ones.Stephanie has been included in Robin stuff for a long time now and Duke dosen't get the same treatment due to antiblackness so THAT'S an actual 'Fuck canon!' moment so you should make it six Robins and know that the intention with only four is always misogyny and whitewashing(also just saying but those fanarts are always ugly anyway,they make them look like shitty anime boys instead of themselves)

Dick is an almost perfect eldest sibling and the other Batkids deeply appreciate him for it,he was Tim's Robin and him and Cass are his favorite siblings,Duke is Jason's favorite brother and vice versa but he's also extremely close to Cass,none of them make Damian go through 'normal youngest sibling treatment' because none of them are normal so they grew a sense of basic decency and Damian's closest to Dick and Stephanie and Stephanie's a canon csa victim so kindly keep your paws off her with your 'date all of your s/os siblings' jokes because she has self-worth and class,thanks

Ignore the original Red Hood and The Outlaws run and anything to do with Jason and Roy friendship in fandom and read the original Teen Titans run,New Teen Titans,Arsenal 1998,The Titans 1999,Green Arrow 2001 and Outsiders 2003 if you want to understand Roy too or at least ask around blogs centered on him for context.Ignore Tom Taylor's Nightwing run and Teen Titans 2003 and Batgirl of Burnside and anything by Devin Grayson(she's quite literally done irreperable damage to Batman lore and i wish i was kidding).Read Robin 1993,90s Young Justice,Batgirl 2000,Batgirl 2009,Red Robin,Son of Batman and literally everything Duke's in which i can provide a reading list for instead and i'm working on a megapost of all the Jason media that's actually good so new fans don't waste their time.I'm genuinely saying this to be helpful because 'fandom isn't activism' is a puratical priviliged phrase that should've never existed just like Batfanon shouldn't either

[freshlluv]

distraction - m.s

summary: after a painful conversation with Matt, where he harshly ended your friendship, you are left heartbroken and confused

warnings: sad, bsfmatt, cussing, use of y/n, not proofread

word count: 1.1k

a/n: this is kinda really bad lmfao

my inbox is always open to requests <3

You sat alone in your room in the middle of your bed. Has it ever been this quiet? The cars from outside would drive past your apartment, that’s all you can hear. It’s only 8pm and I have nothing to do. You quietly sobbed

Matt just dropped me off. That’s all I can remember.

Nick called you 

N: “Y/n?”

You: “Nick?

What happened?”

N: “Matt is crying. What the fuck happened in that car ride?”

You: “Oh. I..” You didn’t want to think about it honestly.

Flashback

“I just don’t feel like we can be friends anymore.” Matt said, his tone dripping with disgust

“What?” You froze. He was joking. Right?

“We all talked, we just think you're a distraction.” He held the bridge of his nose.

“Did you?” You croaked out

“What did Nick say?” You were in defeat, no way Nick would actually say that. And as well as Chris?

“It doesn’t really matter what he said. I think you are a distraction” he said shifting uncomfortably in his carseat.

“Oh.” Your heart broke into a million pieces. You’ve always liked Matt. He was your favorite.

“I’m sorry.” You tried to say. But your throat felt like it was blocked and you couldn’t even swallow. Your face was hot, you just wanted to go home.

“I’ll drop you off.” He said his words were a bit lightened.

 If he never said anything I would’ve been home 10 minutes earlier.

I wouldn’t be crying.

The engine was humming, that's how loud the silence was. No words spoken, no sounds. 

Nothing.

Now: 

N: “Why the fuck did he say that?”

You shrugged like he could see you through the phone. Your head falls into your hands.

You: “I wish I could tell you.” Your voice a bit raspy

A few minutes pass by and it was filled with silence

N: “Hey okay I’m going to help Matt alright?” He says in an almost whisper.

You: “Alright”

You didn’t like that you had all this time on your hands to think about it, to replay it in your head over and over again.

So you got dressed and called your friend to see if you can forget it all and go to a club.

You applied the last of your mascara. 

You didn’t even recognize yourself, it felt like you’ve completely alternated but that wasn’t true. 

At least that’s what you were trying to force yourself to think.

You exited out of the uber and entered the club.

“God!” You yelled it was extremely loud

“Oh my god Y/n!” Her voice was slurred but anyone could recognize it’s your best friend Bri.

“You actually fuckin’ came?” She laughed and gave you her drink

“Here sip. S’good right?”

You nodded trying to not puke already, that was the most terrible drink ever but it’s beer what did you expect.

You went over to the cooler and grabbed yourself your own beer and chugged it.

“So why are ya here?” Bri asked “Did a guy break your pretty heart?” She giggled

“Something like that, remember Matt? Oh yeah he fucked me up”

Hours later, and 3 beers later. (You weren’t much of a drinker to be honest)

“Does Matt really hate me?” You thought to yourself

You’ve grown sick of being here suddenly it was too hot, too loud, too many people. 

You checked your phone

3:26am

You left the club you didn’t want to get into an uber afraid you were going to puke in it.

Everyone was most likely asleep right now. 

Except for one person

The phone rang on maybe until the 3rd ring

“Hello?” He groaned, his voice was deep and tired

“Matt?” You sniffled 

“Y/n are you okay? Where are you?”

“IdontknowIwannagohome!” you said really fast and sobbed

“Fuck, let me keys I’m coming” You heard jangling and the call ended

The realisation quickly hits you. You called Matt, the one you literally just fought. What the fuck were you doing?

You sat at the curb, waiting for him, that's all you could do. 

He pulls up, you could instantly recognize his minivan. You snickered to yourself, you always teased him about it.

You opened the passenger seat and sat down

“Are you okay?” A worried look plastered on his face

You nodded, your lips jutting. Trying not to cry

“Listen Y/n I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to-” He realized it might not be the best time to talk so he just drove.

“I have a bag here um, just throw up in there I guess” He place the bag in my lap

“Matt, you never told me what I was distracting you from.” you swallowed

“I never meant it. I thought you were.. Distracting me from.. Our videos.” he admitted embarrassed. “I’m sorry” he whispered looking at me “Also heres a jacket it’s fucking cold out here”

You hummed as he threw the jacket over your shoulders.

Holding tightly on the jacket around your shoulders you fell asleep.

We arrived at my apartment

“Y/n” He tapped my shoulder “We’re here”

I shook “Huh?” I looked around, noticing my apartment. I slipped off the jacket and took off my seatbelt.

“Thank you so much.” You smiled 

“Of course, but, Y/n look I’m sorry.” The moonlight shined on his face, the outline of his puffy eyes indicated that he did indeed cry.

I just hugged him

“It’s okay.” You whispered into his hair

He hugged you back tightly

“Wait actually. Can you stay over?”

He smirked

“No! Fuck off not like that!” You furrowed your brows annoyed

“Yeah, yeah I know” He rolled his eyes smiling

“I don’t like sleeping alone, y’know” you said quietly

He nodded and we both got out of the car. 

You got to your door and unlocked it and headed inside throwing everything to the floor, your purse, shoes. You left his jacket hanging and went into your room. Matt followed

You slipped out of your dress without a warning 

Matt’s eyes widen and instantly turns around his face flushed

You threw on some sweatpants and a random big shirt (Matt’s shirt)

“Do you need any clothes?” You offered

“Nah I’m good” He cleared his throat

“C’mere” You yawned inviting him to bed. He joined you taking off his socks and stretching

Matt wraps his arms around you and plays with your hair.

“I’m sorry. Genuinely”

You looked at him “I know.” You snuggled into his chest and yawned

You fell asleep instantly, in his warm embrace.

I HATE THIS SO MUCH

[tealmaskmybeloved]

(UPDATE: As of October 1st, my washing machine is working, but the other stuff still applies)

Hey guys.

I really hate asking for help here, but this is important.

So. My washing machine broke, and I can't do laundry.

Laundromats cost money, and in terms of money, my family and I aren't doing so hot. Money is tight and going to laundromats is going to make it even tighter. And if I can't afford the laundromat, I'll have no clean clothes to wear.

My aunt likely isn't going to do anything to help, and she'll just blame my mom for it like she does with everything bad that happens.

Even if the washer was working fine, I'm on a time limit. My aunt wants to have a room for her granddaughter (my cousin's daughter), and that means one of us is going to have to leave or be forced to leave.

I've been doing this program (that I can't go in the specifics of because I don't want to doxx myself) that will help me get a job in the future, but it's at least 10 sessions, Monday to Friday, and I'm only on session 3.

And even then it's gonna take a bit for me to actually get a job.

I want to get out of my house and move somewhere that isn't this.

The house hasn't been tended to by my aunt, and she refuses to do anything about it.

My mom is disabled and can't fix it. Even if she was capable, my aunt should have to be the one to help the house not turn to shit, because my aunt owns the house.

Living here has been an absolute nightmare. For 4 years now, I have had to endure my sibling falling through the floor and getting their leg stuck, me falling down the stairs into literal sewage, using entire bins to collect rainwater from the roof, one of the cats getting an infection from his wart (that had been getting worse each day and she did NOTHING), dealing with fruit flies and roaches multiple times, stepping in cat shit regularly, and having to hear the dogs whine and bark because one has their fur falling out and has a rash because he's allergic to the dog food he eats and the other has severe hip problems due to being in cages 24/7.

The only reason why my family is even here in the first place is due to us not being able to afford living where we lived before, and my aunt took us in.

I've tried to make things work, to find the positive side of things, but living here has taken a toll on my health.

The only source of income my family has at the moment is child support and food stamps.

I almost never ask for help, especially not online, but my family could really use the money.

I do commissions, and my cash app is $AriAnimates79.

If you want to commission me or even donate, it's be much appreciated.

I have a bigger audience here on this blog, although I'll be reblogging it to my others as well.

Anything helps, even reblogging.

Thanks in advance.