#but if things work out for me I'll learn some pretty cool stuff....

[conm1go]

can't wait to not work for a company... let me be free....

[bunni-v1]

hi! congratulations on 500 followers! could you make the full nsfw alphabet list with Idia please? (sorry for the bad English)

🍓I POSTED!!! I've had this sitting in the drafts for a week and I finally decided to post it (YAY!!!). I've also got Jade's qued up for later today, and I'll be working on Azul and Floyds in my free time (when I get free time that is). Sorry I took so long to post, life has been tough on me and I just didn't have the tools to deal with it. I'll be back and posting irregularly until December when I can actually take time and write again.

Idia NSFW Alphabet!

A = Aftercare: Idia Shroud is the WORST at aftercare, and I say this with so much love and kindness to the walking punching bag that calls himself a man. Genuinely though, sex overstimulates him so badly, so he cannot handle anything after the fact. He’s the kind to roll over off you (more like slide you off him) and fall asleep immediately. Of course, he mumbles out something about it feeling good and all that stuff, but 9 times out of 10 he’s out like a light.

B = Body part: He is a thigh man. He doesn’t care if it's thick and meaty, he just wants to rest his head on it. Maybe give it a nibble, if you’d let him of course (consent is key, even for a dirty Otaku like him). For him… he doesn’t like most things about himself, but if you seem to like something about him a lot, he grows to like it too. So if you like his hair, it’s probably his hair, if you like his lips or teeth it’s them. (What can I say, he’s weak for you).

C = Cum: SALTYYYYY! He doesn’t take care of himself what did you expect. It’s unpleasant to taste, and there’s A LOT of it to taste. It’s a pretty thick consistency and really sticky, fun to play with and watch dribble down your stomach and face. 

D = Dirty secret: He wants you to peg him. I wouldn’t say that’s much of a secret, but he thinks it is. 

E = Experience: NONE. Zip, zero, zilch. I make fun of Malleus for being a Virgin, but IDIA IS A VIRGIN. He’ll blush to hold your hand, it’s that bad. However, he does watch a LOT of Porn (Hentai specifically), so he has… an idea of what to do. He’s really nervous first time around, but once he gets comfortable with you he’s pretty good, just a little unrealistic in his expectations sometimes.

F = Favorite position: Doggy! Especially if you’re wearing cute little puppy or kitty ears! He likes watching the way your back arches, and he’s a big fan of pulling your hair or squeezing your hips. Other than that, he loves face-sitting. Surrounded by your thighs, oh that’s a good death for Idia Shroud.

G = Goofy: Initially, he is entirely on accident. He wants to be serious and cool about it, but he’s like a blushing schoolgirl and making a million mistakes. His line delivery is so… cringe and embarrassing you can’t help but laugh. It humiliates him, but eventually, he learns to just embrace it, and he becomes pretty goofy. He loves cracking jokes just to see you smile, cause the one thing he loves more than your thighs has to be your pretty little smile.

H = Hair: I know it’s blue flames too, I just know it. That shit is not tamed either. Like he trims, but honestly it’s hard to control something that's constantly shifting and changing. And, before you ask, yes it does flare up with his emotions like his hair does too. 

I = Intimacy: Depends… Idia isn’t someone I would ever describe as romantic, but he is a sweetie. He likes it hard and rough so it’s hard to say it’s very romantic, but he does like you close and he loves looking at you. You catch him smiling down at you like you’re some kind of goddess sometimes. You won’t catch him saying cheesy lines like how much he loves you or how pretty you are (cause it will actually kill him if he does).

J = Jack off: Mastrubating champ of NRC. He’s alone in his room 90% of the time with unlimited access to the internet and is also an Otaku. Sorry if you disagree, but you’re wrong. I know he gets off at least once a day, more if he has the time. 

K = Kink: Another biter, he just loves marking you up and sending you off with a pretty bruise for everyone to see. He’s a sadomasochist too, depending on whose topping. He wants you to push him around and hit him, make him feel helpless, it’s his favorite thing. Also into pet play, cosplay, roleplaying, and… any kind of play honestly. The weirder the better for him.

L = Location: His room and his room alone. Maybe yours, but he does not trust anyone in your dorm to respect your privacy. Besides, if he’s in his room he knows where everything is, and he can ensure no one will be getting in and seeing you that way.

M = Motivation: Most things, honestly. Be nice to him? He’s hard. Be mean to him? He’s hard. Beat him in his favorite game and act all smug (he let you win)? He’s hard. Lose and pout about it? He’s hard. He’s a sensitive guy, okay, and he thinks everything you do is super hot. Not his fault.

N = No: Share or let someone watch. Absolute nos from him. The idea of sharing you with someone and you like them more? Hah, he’d kill himself. He’s also not a fan of anyone seeing either of you in such a compromising position. He’s too nervous and possessive to let that out of the privacy of his room. Also, this might be controversial, but I can’t see him being into any kind of sibling shit. Too weird for him, he’d never want to think of his precious little brother like that, so why would he want to think of you like that?

O = Oral: He prefers receiving because watching the way you tease him with your sultry gaze as he sinks impossibly further down your throat is… heavenly. Though he isn’t bad at giving either. His tongue is long and boy can that thing move, it can reach places you didn’t even know were possible. Plus his teeth nipping at your most sensitive areas? Praise the seven, that’s good shit.

P = Pace: Fast and rough. He likes to just go at it, and he doesn’t like to stop for anything. Prepare to be pounded into next week with no stops!

Q = Quickie: He likes them, and they’re pretty common, but they’re not his favorite. When he has sex, he likes going for more than one round, and the whole point of quickies is that they’re quick so he doesn’t prefer them.

R = Risk: Yeah, he’s game to try some more risky things, but he’ll back out so fast if he’s uncomfortable for even a second. There are some things he wouldn’t consider, like bringing it out of his room. He’s a big fan of risky texts though. Like, a video of you fucking yourself in the bathroom while he’s in a meeting with the other housewardens? No one’s gonna know if he takes care of himself quickly. 

S = Stamina: He goes for multiple fast and quick rounds. He can usually do about four of them before he’s done for the night, but he’s willing to keep going if he doesn’t satisfy your needs along with his (sometimes).

T = Toys: He has a collection, actually, of really wild shit. Tentacles, ‘alien’ dicks, and even the infamous horse cock. He likes to put a bullet in you and control it from his room, watching you struggle to talk to your friends on the cameras he’s definitely allowed to have access to. 

U = Unfair: He likes to tease, but he forgets to sometimes lol. He gets so caught up in his own pleasure that, occasionally, he’ll just forget he wanted to tease you and make you all sensitive and whiny. He also likes to be teased, so please feel free to torture him when you’re topping <3

V = Volume: He tries very hard to be quiet, but bless his soul he is not. He’s so whiny and whimpery and pathetic, it’s very cute. He wants you to make as much noise as possible so that he can hide his shame, but he’ll still cry into your ear since he can’t contain himself.

W = Wild card: He sometimes prints out the pictures you send to him (with permission) and keeps them in his desk. There’s no real reason why, because he has all of them digitally, but something about having physical pictures is more thrilling to him.

X = X-ray: Hehehe, oh Idia. It is long and it is thick, bless his dad’s genetics. I’m talking like almost seven inches big, like… he’s big. It’s veiny, with one really prominent one on the top that runs from the base to just below his tip. Which, by the way, is blue like his lips. 

Y = Yearning: High, if that wasn’t made obvious before. He craves sex a lot, and it only seems to get worse after he gets with you. You’re just so pretty and perfect he can’t help it <3Z = Zzz: I said it at the start, but it’s near immediate. He gets tired easily after all that physical exertion, he just wants to nap and cuddle, you can clean up in the morning. Let him hold you :(

[skylarkspinner]

fiber art adventures in egypt

I recently got back from a trip to Egypt & finally got around to organizing some pictures to share. One of the things I was most excited about was seeing what I could find on fiber arts and textiles.

Dropping everything under a read more, 'cause this will be a long post haha

first visit: the National Museum of Egyptian Civilization (NMEC)

At the time of visiting, they had a special textiles exhibit. It covered Pharonic Egypt all the way up to modern times, although I only had time to check out the dynastic & a bit of the Coptic portion of the exhibit (which was what I was really hoping to see anyways)

Was super excited to see this diorama in person. I knew about it but had never seen good pictures of it. From the little I've seen of ancient Egyptian spinning, spinning with two spindles seems to be the norm rather than a master technique? It also shows up in tomb art, which the exhibit also shared:

They also used a different fiber preparation (splicing to create a rove of fiber, no traditional drafting to my understanding) so that probably made a difference? Regardless I really want to see if I can replicate the technique, especially because their spindles look so similar to modern spindles??

I took so many pictures of spindles, guys, and I fully intend to either have a few replicas made or to learn to make some myself. Also, although they were unlabeled... I'm pretty sure those are beaters for weaving? That was a bit of a trend with this trip, so much stuff was unlabeled :( I would've killed to at least get some date estimates for some of the stuff they had on display. I was nerding out in here though, and my family took a few pictures of how excited I was getting. A bit embarrassing, but eh haha

The exhibit also had a section on natural dyes used with a fun visual;

There was several diagrams specifically describing each dye source, but in the interest of not overloading on pictures I'll just list them out. For blues; woad, Yellows; turmeric, safflower, saffron, or yellow ochre; reds; madder, henna, pomegranate, and kermes. I originally thought kermes was another way to say cochineal, but it only seems to be distantly related.

next visit: Ramses Wissa Wassef Art Center

A small art center dedicated to hand-weaving wool and cotton tapestries. All of their work was museum quality & awe inspiring!!

Was even invited to their back rooms to watch a few of their weavers working; no I don't have room to put a room-sized loom anywhere but heck do I want one now

Our guide that took us through talked a bit about the natural dyes they use (all of their dyes are dyed in house with what they grow in their dye garden!!!) and got excited to hear I was also interested in natural dyes! He seemed a bit disappointed I'd never worked with indigo and. while indigo scares me, I'll take it as a sign that maybe I should try some time this year haha.

final visit; the Egyptian Museum

we really had to rush through this one which was a huge shame because it's packed full of artifacts. Also, the lighting in there is atrocious, so apologies for the not great pictures ahead.

They had a fascinating display of textile tools, more than what the NMEC had;

(Hand for size reference) I want all of these spindles! So badly! But a few of them look so much like a few of the spindles I own already?? A few of them had a spiraling notch, that's so cool? But also, what's going on with the one with two whorls? I have no idea. I'm fascinated.

Look at these whorls!! Although again, I'm a bit confused; the lack of labeling strikes again. Unsure why some of these "whorls" have two holes, or what the metal object with the wooden handle is. The display implies sewing needles, and some of them do look like it, but others.... really don't look like sewing needles. I'm absolutely enchanted by this little whorl though. I think it has birds on it?

More objects that I'm baffled by- the signage doesn't really indicate what some of this stuff is, if it's even known. Also confused by the object wrapped in white string in the right pic; it looks like a distaff but to the best of my knowledge the (ancient at least) Egyptians didn't use distaffs. It probably popped up in later times and was put in this display since it was still relevant, but I'm still not sure.

I have so many more pictures & thoughts but I'll save those for more specific future projects. I've been doing research outside this trip on ancient Egyptian spinning techniques and desperately want to go deeper into that, this trip just solidified how excited it makes me. If you made it all the way through this, many thanks for reading!

Bonus; look at this ancient linen 🥺

[rogueddie]

Sweet Nothings T | 545 words Prompt for @steddielovemonth: Love is wanting to do everything with someone, even if it's nothing special

Eddie has his keys in hand, holding his jacket with his teeth as he gets ready to leave, when someone knocks on the door.

"Hiya, Ed," Steve greets with a grin, that quickly falters. "Oh, sorry, is it a bad time?"

"Sorta? You're not interrupting anything important."

"But you have other plans. No worries, I'll- uh... what are you going out for?"

"Need a part for the van. Was gonna head up to the scrap yard, see if I could find anything there."

"Oh, cool. I could help, if you want?"

"You sure? It's pretty boring."

"Nah, it'll be fun! C'mon, tell me what you need."

Steve steps back, waving Eddie over to his car.

"You sure you want us to go in your car? Some of the shit we're grabbing is gonna be dirty."

"So I'll clean it? Come on, I'm excited now."

"Excited to go digging through a scrap yard?"

"With you? Yeah." He walks back over, gently pushing Eddie towards his car. "We can make it fun! And I know Henderson has been on your ass as much as he has been on mine about us finally hanging out."

"You're just bored with nothing else to do, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I am. But, hey, two birds with one stone!"

Eddie sighs, finally stepping to the passenger door, rolling his eyes. "Fine, whatever, let's go."

Steve whoops, doing a little fistpump, before rushing to the car when Eddie raises an eyebrow at him.

He keeps up conversation the entire drive and Eddie quickly realises that Steve... he genuinely loves cars. He doesn't know a lot about how they work and, knowing now that Eddie does, he has a lot of questions.

Eddie is happy to answer them.

At the scrapyard, they end up distracted almost immediately. Eddie ends up spending most of the time showing Steve how engines work.

Thanks to the visual and practical aid, Steve learns fast. It only takes him two attempts and a lot of running around, tearing other shit apart, to get one of the abandoned, broken engines to roar to life.

It sputters out as soon as it starts, but it does start.

"This stuff is so cool!" Steve says, bouncing on the balls of his feet, as they finally head back to the car.

Thanks to how much destruction they'd thoroughly caused, finding the little replacement part that Eddie needed hadn't taken long.

"Yeah, surprisingly so."

"Aww," Steve coos, teasingly. "But are you saying that because you mean it or because you love me?"

"It can't be both?"

"That- oh, haha."

"Didn't even mean to make that pun. I'm just that funny, huh."

"No, your jokes are terrible."

"Steve, hey," Eddie stops, faking a serious tone. "You can't say things like that about your boyfriend, it's not nice."

"What are you, the love police?"

"Yes. Put your hands up, you're under arrest."

Steve sticks his tongue out at him, before sprinting off to the car.

Eddie is hot on his heels, struggling to keep himself from laughing as he yells after him, unable to bite back the grin.

He can't help but wonder how he'll ever manage to come back to the scrapyard without Steve.

Nothing is ever as fun as it is when they're together.

[ms-demeanor]

sorry if you've answered this before, and i hope you don't mind me asking, how do you know so much about computers and what seems to me like everything in the world? how did you become so knowledgeable? it's amazing

i just know a little about a lot of things and I probably have a fair number of things that I've dug into more than most people and less than people who actually focus on that stuff! It's kind of an illusion!

I do know a lot about computers and that's because I've worked at a computer company for 12 years and have been deep into a computery subculture for about 20 years - I do genuinely know a lot about consumer computers. That I'll own and that's experience.

I know a fair amount about literature because I've got a degree in it!

I know a fair amount about journalism because I've got most of a degree in it and I worked with journalists for a long time!

I know a fair amount about nutrition because I've got most of a degree in it and because I've been focused on reading a lot about nutrition for more than a decade because of my own food issues!

But mostly I'm just someone who falls down rabbitholes and has a decent ability to recall what I find when I run down them.

Also I get curious about things and will just go. Experience them.

Like at some point i came across a site for people who own and use RealDolls and I got interested in learning more. The site required an application because they didn't want people just trolling so I applied and I ended up reading through the whole site and reading the magazines they sent out for years after because it was just interesting. The way these guys bought clothes or compared repair techniques and cleaning techniques, the way they constructed identities for their dolls - it was all interesting! So now I know about the proper way to store a RealDoll and how their skeletons are put together and the best way to prevent rips or clean inserts.

Now imagine that with everything.

I got interested in quack medicine so I ended up reading the entire back catalogs of quackwatch and science-based medicine.

I got interested in the history of aspartame as a scare-word and I ended up reading a couple of books, SEVERAL entire blogs with decades-long runs, purchasing a military magazine from the 90s, and submitting a FOIA request.

But, like. I don't own a RealDoll or work in that industry. I am not a medical professional. I am not a chemist who works with aspartame. So I get these weird little collections of information where I know what *seems* like a lot to someone who hasn't looked into it but I know a lot less than someone who has taken the time to actually dedicate themselves to that topic.

And sometimes it's a years-long dive and sometimes it's a months-long dive and sometimes it's a few hours of me digging online until I feel satisfied with what I've learned and I never come back to it, but I've got three more talking points than your average joe at a party would.

(Also though I've attended various colleges at various levels for ten-ish years now and I've taken probably more college-level classes on a lot of subjects than most people have because I've now spent several years just kind of kicking around at community colleges and deciding that a cartooning class sounds fun or that a mesoamerican art class fills certain transfer requirements or that I might as well brush up on spanish, french, and german. Access to low-cost college classes in california is a big part of this, and having the time and money to take classes while i'm working is something that I've been very lucky with)

I've also worked pretty much continuously since I was 18, sometimes holding multiple jobs at once, and I know a lot of interesting people who do a lot of interesting things and I ask them about their interesting experiences and if they offer me a chance to go do cool shit with them, like launch a high altitude balloon or blow up some dynamite that's about to expire or join a band, I do it!

I was also one of those kids who had no friends and spent too much time at the library so I'd do things like read through medical textbooks or pull a book of home chemical formulas out of the trash and read it or take it into my head that I was going to read all of Shakespeare before I got to high school so I was a really annoying twelve-year-old and that kind of thing never really let up.

I don't know! I don't think it's that unusual and I think most people do this kind of thing I just happen to have less focus than a lot of people and talk a lot more.

[oracle-of-dream]

Submissive and huh?

Minors DNI

Summary: Your friend Taerae recently learned a new term and wants your thoughts. Explaining it might help him understand properly, but do you have the strength to tell him.

Warnings: Male Reader, Idol Taerae, Student Reader, Lewd faces/Ahegao, Mention of arousal and breeding

Wordcount: 1.2k

Math classes had been kicking your ass all semester and tutoring from the professor wasn't working out. You'd ended up being assigned a study partner. The program was meant for students struggling with the class to help each other. That's how you met Taerae. 

He didn't originally introduce himself as an idol, especially since it was an online class. No one had seen his face. But when you met up with him for the first time to study together, you instantly recognized him from TV. You hit it off over a shared hate for math and spent more time together outside class.

He'd complain about his idol life issues and you'd give him any notes from class he'd missed.

You'd just gotten home from a late-night study session at the library. As if it knew, your phone lit up with a text as you sat on your bed.

TR: Yo! Y/N, I met some fans while out with the members today!

YN: Cool. Don't you meet fans wherever you go?

TR: Well these stuck out!

YN: How?

TR: Well, I noticed them, a bunch of guys, giggling in the convenience store and pointing at me and Hao while we were shopping. I didn't want to embarrass them so I just played it cool and ignored them. But then they came up to me!

YN: Okay, some brave fans? That's it?

TR: Just wait a sec! 

TR: They came to me and told me they were fans. But more specifically, MY fans! Of course, I was happy to hear, but they were foreigners because they used a term I didn’t know.

YN: What term?

TR: Submissive and Breedable?

TR: I know what submissive means, they mean I'm not an aggressive person. That's not entirely true, but I'm submissive at times.

You looked at your phone, blinking a few times. Some "fans" dared to say that!?

TR: I can't find anything when I look it up, it's probably slang, right?

Maybe telling him that his fans want to breed him wasn't the best thing to tell your friend. He was just too wholesome for that.

YN: Yeah, it is, but it's not something cool. No one says it really, it's not the trend anymore.

TR: Really? I know trends, I'm not old, but I haven’t heard of that.

YN: See? There's no reason to worry, just fans being weird.

TR: Well, the photo they wanted was also...off.

YN: Off how?

TR: They wanted me to stick my tongue out and look up at the camera, which was super high above me. To be honest–it felt a little embarrassing to pose like that.

You shook your head trying not to imagine his cute self making lewd faces for a group of boys, but it was hard. And so were you.

YN: You should be more careful, they could use photos like that weirdly.

TR: What do you mean?

YN: Let's drop it. Subject change, what are you doing now?

TR: I'm getting ready for bed, I just got under the covers.

You looked at the clock, midnight was on its face.

YN: Oh shit, I didn't even realize. You should sleep!

TR: No, no, I'm pretty awake. Plus, it's nice talking to you. Did you want to video call while you get ready for bed?

You’d done it before, talking on video call into the night, but it was always a little like Taerae just wanted to see you.

YN: Sure, I'll call you.

You pressed the video call button on your phone. It showed your reflection as you waited, automatically you straightened your hair a little and kicked some stuff on the floor out of frame.

Taerae answered the phone with a smile, the camera close to his face.

You laughed as you set your phone on your desk, "Well hello to you too, why so close?"

"No reason, I just want to see you closely."

"Well, I can see you so closely I can count your pores," You scoffed as you went into your closet to find pajamas for the night.

"Is it weird I'm holding it so close?"

"A little, but it's no big deal. If you don't wanna show yourself then why'd you wanna video call?"

Taerae didn't answer.

"Are you still thinking about what those guys said?"

He shuffled in bed, "Mmhm."

"I promise it's nothing bad."

"Then why don't you just tell me?"

You sighed, "Okay, fine, I'll spill."

Taerae's eyes peered curiously at the camera as he waited for you to come out of your closet. You settled on wearing a long-sleeved T-shirt and shorts. You returned to find Taerae's eyes filled with impatience.

You swallowed awkwardly, "You already know what the submissive part means, but the other part..."

"Breedable," Taerae reminded you.

"Yeah–It means," You struggled to find a good way to break it to him with that look in his eyes. So full of trust and purity. "It means, they wanna do it with you."

Taerae's expression dropped into surprise, "Oh, that's it? I read about that kind of stuff of fans wanting me to have sex with them. That's not so bad."

"Well, breedable means, specifically where you'd be the one getting fucked. Likely by a man. Who wants to... finish in you."

You couldn't bring yourself to look at the screen to see his expression. He'd fallen silent, thinking of a response. It felt like ten minutes passed until he broke the silence.

Taerae's voice was deep and serious, "Y/n."

"Yeah?"

"Look at the screen." You looked at the screen to see Taerae in bed, holding the camera above him to show off his shirtless torso that was mostly covered by the bed sheet except for his collarbone and neck. "Am I breedable right now?"

You felt warm in your face as you answered, "Yeah, I-I guess."

"Submissive, too?"

"Sure," You said as you looked down at your hands.

"Yes or no! Sure isn't good enough, and look at me!"

You complied, looking at him. He smiled before making a face; his eyes looking up at the camera as he stuck out his tongue and held up a peace sign with his other hand.

"Jesus, Taerae!" You looked away quickly. Your heart was in your ears, pounding as the image of sweet Taerae's lewd face was plastered behind your eyelids.

He laughed loudly. "I am, aren't I? Submissive and breedable. I take it as a compliment, they like me that much! To be honest, you look all shy... You look a little submissive too."

You moved your phone so he couldn't see you anymore.

"I was kidding! Don't hide from me!" Taerae's muffled voice shouted from the speaker of your phone. 

After you calmed down, you turned your phone back over to see him still there. Still shirtless, and holding his phone at the same seductive angle.

"You're so weird!" You yelled at Taerae, who just giggled.

"And you still like me anyway. Even with all my breedable energy."

"I'm going to hang up–"

"What!? We gotta see you do the pose too, what if you're more breedable than me, we should test how–"

You cut him off as you pressed the red dial button. You turned your phone off before he could call you again. You lay in bed, alone in the dark, thinking about Taerae's face.

And in the privacy of your home, you test if you can also feel submissive and breedable, making Taerae's new iconic look. A secret he'll never know about... As if you didn't already have a big secret.

[bamfkeeper]

NSFW Alphabet: Azazel

a/n: I saw Deadpool & Wolverine today and since Azazel was in the movie, I had to get this out. It's been in my drafts for days ;;. I missed him so much, and it was so cool to see him on the big screen again. I'll get some Sabretooth stuff out soon too. If people like this character I will write more but as far as hcs and fics I probably won't write too much about him. Please refer to SFW version, this character is a little darker themed, so naturally so is he intimately. Afab reader, mentions of knife play.

Minors DNI. 18+ under the cut.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex):

Azazel isn't super interested in aftercare. His idea of it is pretty basic, and he would probably think that simply laying beside you after is good enough.

I can see during more intense sessions that he might be more forward with touches. He would mostly let you take care of yourself, leave you to bathe or do what you need on your own while he stays laying in bed coming down from his high.

If you're particularly bruised up, he might help a bit more, but he still watches and lets you take care of yourself. He doesn't like getting too involved. I can see him giving in if you really, really beg him to help if you are sore or hurt in any way, for the sake of keeping you satisfied enough.

I think something subtle and 'good enough' for him would be letting you snuggle into him and he just lets you. He might drag his nails up and down your back while you calm down and relax, or his tail caresses your bruises where he might've whipped you with it yes this will happen.

When you get more into your relationship and start to have harder sessions where his kinks come out more, he realizes he needs to do a little better in this department so he makes more of an effort. He loves to feel how you shake for him, it makes him feel so much pride in himself.

I wanna imagine his red bamfs being let into the room once you're done and they curl up against you, their warm bodies providing comfort too. The little guys don't know what happened, but they can sense exhaustion and slight pain from you so they lay with/on you.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

He loves a curvy lady. I think he has a thing for wide hips and he strikes me as a boob kind of guy. But he loves a good ass too. He likes to smack your ass when he has sex, listening to your noises and watching you struggle a little as he marks your backside up with handprints.

On himself, I think everything makes sense.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically):

He's fairly clean with it, but he can be a little messy towards you. He either cums inside you or on your face if you're blowing him.

He likes to watch you swallow his spunk, or he likes seeing his messy he can make you by releasing on your face.

His cum is thicker than normal, it's slightly more solid than an egg white consistency, and he tastes a bit salty. But it's mild enough to be doable if you swallow.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

Honestly Azazel is pretty open to things he wants, so I don't think he'd keep many secrets. I think instead he'd just never admit to specific things he likes or enjoys. Something like you holding onto him and snuggling him he might enjoy but never admit to it.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?):

This man has has sex with dozens of women (canon). He knows what to do. He's incredibly skilled, and he's learned how to do things to make you squirm that no other man could possibly think to do.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying):

He'd like any position where he feels in charge. I think you riding him would be one of his favorites because you are doing most of the work and he can see how desperate you are for him. He can sit back and watch.

Or doggy just to grab onto you and drill you. I can also see something basic like missionary but he throws your legs around and almost bends you in half in how he fucks you.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.):

I think Azazel would be pretty serious because he thinks of intimacy as a time where he can be passionate and he doesn't really think about being silly.

I do think he would make sexual comments in a teasing manner, because he finds teasing to be 'funny' but that is about the extent of being goofy for him.

If you laughed or giggled during sex, he might be a little caught off guard and insulted depending on the situation, but if he sees you're enjoying himself he will just keep doing what he's doing.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.):

He takes pride in his appearance, so he is groomed well below the belt. He keeps everything tight, and that shorter cut does feel good to ride on because it rubs your clit just right.

Sometimes he lets it grow out but for the most part he likes a more neat trim than letting it get too crazy.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect):

He's generally pretty rough, but in a passionate way. He likes to do whatever he feels like, even with a hard smack there is a caress that comes after so it's not like he's full out making things uncomfortable.

Azazel has the ability to be romantic too, and he is when he wants you to do something or try something new. He tries to make it sound sweet and desirable. Think the devil trying to convince you of something. He's a smooth talker and absolutely knows how to woo you and get you in the mood.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon):

He does from time to time, but it's not a super driven thing for him. If he has a partner he doesn't do it a whole lot. He rarely feels turned on enough to jerk himself off, especially if he's with you. He can just have you assist him with his little problem.

Though every now and then I can see him masturbating if he's super pent up and hasn't had a lot of time to let it out. Does he use his tail on himself? Maybe?

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks):

Oh boy. He has quite the array of things he likes.

Dominance and submission, he is 100% dominant and he would expect his partner to be subservient to him. That is the only way he would be romantically involved with someone, I just can't see him in a role other than dominant. It gives him the power he seeks and makes him feel good to have someone so obedient. He might even go as far as slave play, which can be rather degrading, but anything that gives him that power rush.

Worship, he keeps up with the demon aesthetic so obviously that comes with the desire to be worshiped. He loves the idea of it, and he adores when you treat him as such. Worshipping his very being would get him so turned on, body worship to him is also a huge thing.

BDSM stuff would also be in his ballpark. He dabbles, and he likes to use his tail a lot. He uses it to restrain your wrists, or he uses it to whip your body. He is a bit of a sadist so anything that leaves a mark on you is very attractive to him. He loves to choke you with his tail, just as your cheeks heat up and you feel light headed. He has you suck on his spade while he chokes you.

Degrading/humiliation is also something he absolutely loves. It plays hand in hand with his other kinks, because you being so willing to do whatever he says and endure what he wants is something he will never get tired of. He loves having such a dedicated pet partner.

Exhibitionism always interested him. He's possessive of you, like a toy or property. He wants everyone to know it, so much so that he'd screw you in front of anyone he felt like if it meant they knew who you belonged to. But he wouldn't allow anyone else to touch you, he's too greedy for that.

Knife play would be something he would dabble in, all depending on your reaction. He likes seeing you squirm, and he knows just how much pressure to put against your skin. He is careful about it, but if you give him the green light to actually break skin he will without hesitation. Nothing severe, just shallow marks. If you're really wanting to show your dedication to him, he might carve his initial into you.

Orgasm denial. He loves the control, and he often teases and denies you until your cheeks are wet with tears and you are begging him for an orgasm. He loves to see you so desperate, and once he gets you to that point, he gladly obliges.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do):

As mentioned, he isn't opposed to doing it in public. He will fuck you anywhere he damn well pleases. And if you get too overwhelmed or uncomfortable, it's easy to just teleport away.

Without being obvious or vocal about it, he will think about your preferences. If you like it best behind closed doors, so be it. As long as he gets to fuck, he doesn't really care.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going):

He adores being praised, because it makes him feel important. He's a power driven man, so anywhere he can get that hit he takes it.

Any sort of behavior where you worship him, so any kind of intense compliments will get him going.

You can never go wrong with submissive behavior, either. Doing what he says when he says it, he likes that you just do as he asks. It makes him want to reward you.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs):

He wouldn't do anything that would cause you severe injury. He can't have you hurt now can he? He doesn't want that. A few bruises and scrapes during sex with him is normal and you get used to it, but anything that would cause permanent damage or injury he wouldn't do.

As knife play was mentioned, if you allowed him to carve you he'd make a deal where he would ensure the wound is dealt with properly. Or any little cuts he gives your skin. Anything more severe that would break your skin whether it be from a knife, his tail, or other instruments, he will clean for you as a reward for enduring his harder play.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.):

He's quite selfish, he likes receiving better than giving. He loves to see his dick in your mouth because to him, you're using everything you have to please him. For Azazel, every hole you have is his to use. But he will make sure you enjoy yourself.

When giving, he's quite skilled since he's got the experience. He can make you cum quick, or drag it out. He loves to tease and make you beg before letting you cum. By default, he won't give you full on head, but he will lap and lick enough for you to become more slick for fucking.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.):

He can be pretty much anything. He generally likes to take his time, make you squirm and whine and plead with him. But once he gets going he is mostly pretty rough.

If you are sore or recovering from a hard session and you have sex, he will reign it in and go a bit slower than normal.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.):

He'd rather not do quickies because he likes to have the time to fully use you. For him, a good face fuck is a quickie.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.):

Absolutely down to experiment. He does so many things to you, if you brought something up to try, he'd be willing to experiment.

Azazel also takes risks of course, he teleports you all over the place to fuck for fun.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?):

He has decent stamina. Sex with him feels drawn out because most of the play is with tools or a lot of foreplay. He also doesn't let you cum for a good majority of it so it feels like a really good orgasm when he finally lets you.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?):

He owns a lot of BDSM related toys. All of the things he has are for you, he doesn't have anything specific for himself. He's never been interested in using anything on himself.

I can see maybe using a vibrator against his cock to stimulate himself slightly, but that would be the extent of using anything on himself.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease):

Azazel teases you to tears, literally. He's not satisfied until you have them streaming down your cheeks and you are begging for an orgasm, or for more.

On the opposite end, he does not like being teased. If you're blowing him and you pop off before he cums, he will grab your head and fuck your throat until he does, just to ensure you know who's in charge and who can tease.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.):

He makes grunts and groans, but he mostly dirty talks you. His voice is deep and gravelly, but it can be smooth and enticing when he wants it to be. We've heard it briefly in First Class, but if you are focused on the comic more than the film, I imagine a voice similar to Black Phillip, maybe slightly deeper with a growl to it.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character):

He likes his tail sucked on, the tip of his tail is sensitive and he gets pleasure from it. Not like his cock, but it would be like the pleasure from a hickey. Enough of a sensation to turn you on or get you heavily in the mood.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes):

Azazel is super prideful about himself, and you would think that contrasts his actual self but it doesn't.

He has an impressive cock, it's red like his body and it gets darker red towards the tip. It looks like he dipped it in blood, it's such a pretty mixture of red shades.

His size varies, but generally speaking he is between 7-8 inches and he's girthy. He has prominent veins, surprisingly fairly symmetrical. They run on the sides of him that feel really nice when he's inside you.

He has nicely sized balls too, which he does like fondled.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?):

His drive isn't that high, but he's always down to fuck if you are. Depending on his mood he is more open to spontaneous sex. He won't actively seek out sex constantly from you, especially considering if you took quite the session with him recently. He watches how you move around too. If you're limping he backs off. But if you seem okay, then he will make a move and see if you're receptive.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards):

He doesn't fall asleep quick, he knows there are things to take care of first. Even after the clean up, he will sit and wind down, having a drink as the high wears off.

Azazel lets you snuggle close, and even after you've fallen asleep, he will stay up for a bit. Eventually he will fall asleep next to you, he's very warm naturally so your sleeping body instinctively will press into him. His warmth feels good against your bruises.

He also likes to wrap his tail around you, loosely, an ankle or wrist, just to hold onto you more. Especially if he is turned away from you, his tail will remain for silent reassurance he's there.

Thanks for reading. <3

*BAMF*

dividers by @/adornedwithlight

Cover photo from Amazing X-Men #1 (2014)

[rosyhoneydew]

I'll Cover You

Written for @bucktommypositivityweek | Week 2, Day 2: Scenes from a firetruck | cw for mentions of dissociation, flashbacks

I wrote two entries for today! If mildly steamy fluff is more your vibe it's here -> Stolen Moment

The winds are strong, even days after the tornado’s long gone.

Buck hadn’t seen anything like it before. Tornadoes, sure, but the kind of large-scale damage that came from an invasive cloud of bees droning en masse and descending on the city like a plague? A first. He’s nursing a sting or two himself for a few days.

It’s almost a relief to get called on scene two days later. Almost. Because while plane crashes are, at least, familiar, they’re still grueling.

All things considered, it’s not as bad as it could’ve been. The 737 went down on land this time, but it had only barely made it off the ground before taking a nosedive back onto the tarmac. The passengers were buckled in and the drop itself wasn’t too big. So yeah, they got pretty lucky.

They’re still on the scene now. Hen and Eddie are working at the cockpit last he knew, Chim’s somewhere in the med bay here with him, working on a bigger trauma. Buck’s been handling some of the lower grade injuries and he’s cool, really. Yeah it would be nice to be out there, doing the big boy stuff, but they’ve got a new captain and he’s learning to pick his battles.

He’s just finishing wrapping up a kid’s ankle. He can’t be more than 7 but he’s been so brave, holding his little sister’s hand to keep her from crying. He’s got the elastic bandage just in place when the wind rips the kid’s jacket from where it was draped on his shoulders and under the 217’s truck.

“I gotcha!” he reassures the kid quick. “One sec, you stay right here for me, okay?”

Buck shuffles over to the truck in a walk-run and bends down low to peek underneath. It would probably be easier to grab the jacket from the other side, but he’s already here so he just finishes ducking down, crawls under and reaches out for the corner of the fabric.

He’s still under the truck when the next big wind hits. It leaves the truck shaking and groaning around him. Buck freezes. It feels like all logical thought in his brain shuts off.

The truck isn’t going to tip over. He’s not stuck. If he had the presence of mind he could wiggle his toes, even. But there’s something about being under here, hearing the voices around him, it has him tense all over. He can’t move.

When he looks back on it, he’ll wonder why it set him off. It’s not nighttime, there are no kids with bombs strapped to them, it’s not like he was even under the truck when it tipped last time. It’s a fluke, almost. But it can’t be helped. He’s petrified.

—

Tommy honestly thought his first call working with the 118’s A-shift would have had a little more novelty, but it’s just been long. He’s happy to see Evan, of course, but he hardly sees him. He’s been over in the med bay for the last couple of hours that Tommy’s been teamed up with Viera, pulling passengers out of the wreck.

He had at least been able to drop off an older woman directly to Evan about an hour ago.

Well, Patricia, it looks like your day is looking up! You’re in good hands with this one. He’ll patch you up real good.

Ahh, my job’s the easy part. You’re just lucky firefighter pilot Kinard was here to save you.

She’d only had a sprained wrist, but Tommy had watched them from afar for a minute, ever impressed with the way Evan kept her calm, reassurances and jokes taking the fear out of her eyes. He has to turn back before long, but he lets that moment carry him through the next push. He’s going home to that man.

He’s jogging back to check in at base when he hears crying to his right. There’s a kid standing still, holding the hand of a little girl and he’s wailing at the sky. That doesn’t seem right. Tommy’s eyes track around the area and he spots boots sticking out of the side of their truck. Definitely not right. He changes course, picking up his speed as he approaches the kids.

“Hey, bud, you okay?” He’s got his hands on the boy’s shoulders, grounding him, hopefully. “You hurting anywhere?”

The kid coughs out a few more sobs in Tommy’s face, but he shakes his head. He looks like he’s willing himself not to be scared. Jesus, kids are resilient.

“Alright, that’s good, I’m going to check on my friend here, you gonna be okay for a minute?” A nod. Good.

Tommy turns his attention to the truck behind him, lays flat, knocking his helmet off in the process. The guy’s not moving, but Tommy’s not able to figure out at a glance what happened here. There’s no gas leak, no threat to public safety over here.

“You good, man?” he calls out.

The body of the guy twitches. Not dead. That’s good. He clears his throat.

“Can you feel your feet? I can try to move you but I need to know if you’ve got any injuries I should watch out for.”

No response. Okay. Time to change tack.

Tommy rights himself and walks to the other side of the truck, resuming position on the asphalt. He shuffles in a little closer and finally gets a look at the guy’s face.

Evan. It’s Evan.

“Evan?” he says. He’s not sure it comes out as much more than a breath.

Evan’s eyes do flick to his then, but there’s still something distant in his gaze. He’s dissociated. It comes to mind then, the stories told at happy hours and trivia nights, and the ones told only in the sanctuary that is their bedroom. They're good stories, but Tommy knows better than most the toll that kind of shit can take on a person. Evan's having a flashback.

“Alright, alright, baby,” Tommy says under his breath. He’s not sure Evan would hear him even if he spoke up. He looks pretty gone.

Tommy scoots half a foot closer, puts both palms flat to the ground.

“Evan,” he starts, “can you do this with your hands? Just like mine.” He flexes his hands a bit to demonstrate.

Evan’s own hands are balled up. It looks like he army crawled under here. His arms are bent at his sides, curled in tight half under his body. He blinks a few times.

“Your hands, Evan.” Tommy picks his own up and places them back down again. “Just like this.”

Evan mirrors the movements.

“Good job, that’s perfect.”

“Kinard?” He hears from behind him.

“We’re good here, Sloane.” Who knows if she’ll believe him; she’s a damn good secondary when they’re in the air but she’s nosy as all get-out.

He hears the sound of her turnouts rustling as she shifts around, deciding whether to stay or go.

“Sloane. I got this. Can you round back to the kids on the other side? I’m going to be here a minute.”

He hears the sound of boots squeaking behind him as she does what he asks. Okay, Ev, just you and me.

Evan’s fingertips are curling, his eyes pinched closed.

“Ev, sweetheart, look at me.” He does. “I’m gonna grab your arm okay? Then we can work on getting you over here. Sound good?”

There’s no response, but that’s okay. Tommy’s going real slow. He reaches out and places a sure hand on Evan’s arm.

“Can you push yourself toward me?”

His eyes close again and for a second Tommy falters, mentally jumping two steps back to figure out a different path forward. But then Evan pushes. He digs the meat of his hand into the ground and uses the leverage to slide his body toward Tommy.

“Just like that. Exactly like that.”

He’s close enough now that Tommy can reach his shoulder. He gets a good grip and rolls Evan the rest of the way, pulling him up to sitting once he’s on his back and out from under the belly of the truck. He watches as Evan scrambles to pull his feet out.

Tommy’s got him sat in between the V of his legs, one arm around his waist, and brings the other up to Evan’s face, pushing the damp hair off his forehead. They’re tucked in between trucks, so the sound of commotion from the continued efforts of the other houses is muffled. The loudest thing he can hear is their panting, both going a little boneless with relief.

Tommy places a kiss to Evan’s temple. He’s sweaty there too. He feels Evan’s breathing slow down a bit, but he’s reluctant to break the quiet. He’s not sure that Evan’s flashbacks are like his, everyone’s a little different, but he sometimes needs the silence after. Just to collect himself. So he gives that to Evan, too.

“Did- did you get it?” Evan finally says, startling Tommy just a bit.

“Get it?”

“The jacket.” He’s smoothing his palms over his pants; nervous habit.

Tommy stretches his neck to look behind him, sees the blue rain jacket lying there. He can pinch it with his fingers from where they’re sitting. He drags it out. Troublemaker.

They sit together for another minute. Tommy can hear Sloane marching the kids away to find their parents. If he really tunes into the noises around them, he can hear some laughter and lots of walkies; they're finishing up here. He'll probably get called in soon enough to pack up.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

Evan nods, then tips his head back onto Tommy’s shoulder. “Better. Thank you.”

Tommy moves his hand down to Evan’s face, just to tilt his cheek a little closer, plants a long, sure kiss there.

“I’ve got you.”

Evan smiles. “Yeah, you got me.”

[egophiliac]

Hello! Sorry to bother but do you have any digital art tips? I’m quite new to it and any tips, tricks or advice would be helpful! Your coloring style is very beautiful and I love it a lot!

thank you! 💚💚💚 sorry this is a bit late, hopefully there's still something helpful in it!

(also, it got pretty long, sorry!)

I think the biggest thing is to just take things slow -- digital art feels different than drawing traditionally, and it's SUPER easy to get overwhelmed by the billions of cool features that the digital world offers. (I say, as someone who spends a lot of time downloading cool brushes and textures...and then never using them ever.) there is a ton of really cool stuff you can do digitally, but because there's so much, I think it's really important to take time to figure out what is and isn't working for you. spend some time doodling without any intent to do a finished piece, figure out how you like to hold (or not hold) your tablet, what keyboard shortcuts you end up using a lot (and therefore might want to map to your pen/tablet buttons for quicker use)...that kind of thing!

everyone's workflow and preferred program and style are different, so it's hard to give hard-and-fast general advice. but the things that I think of as the essentials for learning digital art programs, and what I think of as a good order to focus on learning them in (although YMMV, especially depending on what kind of art you're doing):

brush customization (e.g. flow, opacity, softness)

layers and layer masks

selections and transformations (e.g. scale, rotate, flip horizontal/vertical, skew) (skew is underrated and I will die on that hill)

blending modes (e.g. multiply, screen)

adjustments/adjustment layers (e.g. hue/saturation, curves)

and I think most stuff after that is gravy! often very good gravy though! but yeah, as overall advice I recommend just taking things one little bit at a time, spending some time just drawing and messing around with each feature and what you can do with it. whether or not you end up incorporating any of it into your workflow, it's always good to try things out and just see how they feel! :D

and just so there is at least a little more concrete helpfulness in here, here's a few more specific things that I think are super important to keep in mind!

use! your! tablet/pen buttons! I mentioned this earlier, but they are extremely useful for keyboard shortcuts that you use often! most programs will also let you create new shortcuts for other things -- personally, I use the magic wand tool to fill in big color blocks a lot, so I made shortcuts for 'expand selection' and 'fill' and then mapped them to my tablet buttons.

flop your work horizontally often! when you're working on something, you get used to the way it looks, so seeing it mirrored is a quick way to see it with fresh eyes! in my experience, it often feels like this:

(a common thing is to find that everything is sort of 'leaning' too much one way, which is where skew really comes in handy!) (seriously, I love skew, it is my savior)

if you're working with color, keep a hue/saturation adjustment layer (or a layer filled with black or white and set to Color) on top and toggle it on occasionally to check your values! a lot of people who know a lot more about color than me (and are better at putting it into words) have written about why values are so important, so all I'll say is that the rule of thumb is that your image should still be readable in greyscale:

there are some exceptions and grey areas (do ho ho), but it's a good general rule to keep in mind! (some programs also have a colorblind mode, so you can check to see how your work will look to someone with colorblindness!)

and finally, here's some digital art programs I recommend, if you're still looking for a good one!

free: krita, FireAlpaca

paid: ClipStudio, Procreate (iOS/iPad only)

[stu-dyingstudent]

Sakura Haruno fic recs: ANBU

AHHHH!!!! I love ANBU fics, especially when they involve Sakura. It was such a cool concept, which was unfortunately never fully expanded upon. However, our lack of knowledge regarding the shadow corps allows for some really cool fic ideas since authors can take creative liberty on the structure and workings of the division.

In my opinion, Sakura had the most potential out of team 7 to join ANBU (at least more than Naruto). It's all about being discreet and efficient and although she wasn't strong during og, she possessed abilities that would be valuable for this. Her clever mind, chakra control, and genjutsu potential would've made her a good fit. Naruto was too flamboyant and Sasuke was too reckless and cocky, but this is just my take. However, with her new skill set from her training with Tsunade, I don't think she would be able to go down that path anymore.

Also, try out my ANBU ROOT list (some overlap).

Started: 2024.08.06

Last Updated: 2024.08.29

note: feel free to check out my master list which has a bunch of Sakura Haruno fic recs (all organized)!

----

Masks by mads999 || ao3 || kakasaku || E || canon divergent || complete

1. Sakura's Inner is far more diabolical than anyone ever expected 2. Crows prove to be cruel mentors 3. Sakura comes to learn exactly how much she hates Kakashi (as well as how alike they are, in the most terrible of ways)

Kakashi is a hateful turd and Sakura is spiteful! I hate this ship and I'm not a big fan of Kakashi here, but boy is this fic good. One of the best character developments I've read for Sakura and she certainly becomes of force to be reconned with. The ANBU lore in Masks is absolutely phenomenal and I love the whole system that is put into place as it adds for some drama (lol). Also, can we talk about how awesome crow summons are????

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Five Kingdoms for the Dead - Evil Is A Relative Term || ffn || M || canon divergence || complete

After the Forest of Death, Sakura comes to realize that being weak is no longer an option. However, she finds that change is sometimes painful and that truth doesn't always come easy. Luckily, she'll have some help along the way.

It's been a while since I've read Five Kingdoms for the Dead, but I just remember it being absolutely great! I'll be honest, I found a lot of the mind stuff pretty confusing at times, but it was still enjoyable. Also, some great characters are utilized in this fic such as Neji, Sai, and Itachi. Makes me really wish that we saw more of Sakura and Neji working together in Naruto since I think they compliment each other quite well.

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Trials of Change - Espoiretreves || ao3 || gen || time travel AU || complete

Haruno Sakura made a promise. Looking in the eyes of her Shisou and the reanimated Hokage, she took on the most important mission of her life. Go back in time and try to prevent the 4th Shinobi War. Now, Sakura is back to her 5-year-old body, with all the knowledge and haunting memories of the future. She vows to keep her precious people safe and stop certain events from happening, without altering the timeline too much. The trials her emotions and logic put her through have her questioning her very existence, but for the sake of peace, she has to push forward. No matter what.

Trials of Change is actually apart of a time travel series and I have to say that it is probably one of the best of the genre! Now, Sakura is not in ANBU here, but she works very closely with team Ro (Kakashi's ANBU team) and it's a huge part of the story, so I'm choosing to count it anyway. I really adore all of the worldbuilding and backstories going on here in addition to the fact that there are breaks. Yes, the story keeps moving, but there are other things going on, like playdates, and not just Sakura trying to save the world. Also, if you love Shisui then definitely check this out since he has a huge role and his and Sakura's friendship is just so precious.

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bite me and see, said the fly to the spider - MirrorImage003 || ao3 || itasaku || T || non-massacre AU || ongoing

In which Sakura is not initially a part of Team 7. In which she wears her failures like armor and brandishes her fears like her most trusted weapons. In which I do what hundreds of other authors have done before me, and rewrite Sakura's story. Non-massacre AU. Canon Divergent. Slow-burn.

After Sakura's first team, consisting of the graduating class's "expendables," dies, she joins team 7 and faces backlash along her shinobi journey. Sakura doesn't join ANBU until the later chapters so fair warning that there isn't too much content in that regards (unless it updates). Nonetheless, Sakura views ANBU as vital to her career as it offers her the highest clearance she can get. Gaining her opportunities for information her civilian-born status didn't allow her privy to.

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The Sixth Shadow - thinknicht || ao3 || kakasaku || M || canon divergent - eventual time travel AU || ongoing

No one seemed to find it odd when little Haruno Sakura threw herself smack dab in front of a Chidori and Rasengan. Not even Kakashi stopped to wonder.(He really should have.)

The story of how Sakura came to be the sixth hogake despite all of the challenges thrown her way. I especially love Sakura's drive in addition to the political aspects. However, be warned that Kakashi is an absolute HATER (in the beginning), but he gets better! The Sixth Shadow is extremely long and I only just recently got to Sakura's introduction to ANBU, so I can't say too much in that regard.

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Daughter of Fire - justjstuff || ao3 || kakasaku || E || canon divergence || incomplete (maybe ongoing)

Sakura got up and didn’t bother brushing the dirt from her dress. She had a feeling she was about to get even dirtier.She looked at the memorial stone one last time, memorizing the characters without even realizing she was doing it. It would serve from that moment on as a reminder of her determination. She wouldn’t let Naruto and Sasuke join the names carved on that stone.That was her nindo.

Sakura's growth throughout Daughter of Fire is great and realistic all while pointing out aspects from the original series which were flawed and dare I say misogynistic. I struggled a bit in the beginning to justify her abilities, but overall the story is really well done and the ANBU aspects are quite intriguing.

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cut the head off the snake - itsthechocopuff || ao3 || T || time travel AU || complete

when eighteen-year-old, post-war Sakura is thrown back into her tiny, pre-Academy body, she makes a decision. she'd had a childhood once already, and this time, she's more interested in Not Dying when the inevitable shit hits the proverbial fan. so she will work harder, care less, kill more, and smile when she's done.and hey, if she ends up reviving an extinct nature transformation to attract the most corrupt, power-hungry man from her timeline, all the better for her, right?

Such a unique take on a time travel AU and Cut the Head Off the Snake executes it perfectly. Sakura decides that her first order of business is to infiltrate ROOT and that's exactly what she does. Sai, Shin, and Shisui are all great characters and team Ro is present as well. Very good!

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Flowers - Idunmy || ao3 || E || kakasaku || canon divergence || ongoing

Flowers only bloom just before they wilt When Sakura loses her fight against Ino in her Chuunin exams, she questions her ability to ever become a kunoichi, too weak to protect herself, let alone her village One wrongful promotion later and Sakura gets a second chance in the shape of a mysterious new teacher who against all odds is willing to put her faith in a young girl with potential and a willingness to fight. Or- a fix-it inspired fic where Sakura grows to be the powerhouse she was destined to become.

Flowers is a newer series (which has recent updates) and I love it! Critiques are made towards the medical ninja training, which I believe needed to be discussed and it's refreshing to see. In most ANBU fics I've read, Sakura is immediately put onto the strongest team, but here it's a bit different. She begins on a demolition squad, which not only suits her skill set quite well, but is a realistic approach to how she would be introduced to the corps. Anyway, it's one of my favorite reads at the moment and I really like where the story is going.

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names. - waterpllar || ao3 || T || gen || canon divergence || complete

There are no names or faces in ANBU. Everything is designed to be strictly formal, efficient and professional. A recently orphaned Sakura, however, learns that some regulations aren't meant to be followed, and finds a place in Team Ro after being shunned from her former teammates. (fic prompt from anon on tumblr: orphaned sakura in anbu with yamato, genma, and team ro.)

AHHHH poor Sakura. After her parents' death Sakura seeks Tsunade's help out of desperation to become useful. Under recommendation, Sakura's new goal is to make it into ANBU.

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Equinox - FM_White || ao3 || itasaku || M || anbu AU || complete

ItaSaku (Post Uchiha Massacre) AU: Climbing through the ranks of Konoha, Sakura finds herself with the invitation to join ANBU and a chance to learn from one of the most renowned and legendary ninja in the world. Despite her efforts to grow stronger however, she finds the world isn't as black and white as it looks and that some truths are easier to hide than others.

I don't remember Equinox very well, but I love most works by this author sooo. Anyway, Itachi stays in Konoha and instead it's Sasuke that goes rougue. Sakura, Naruto, and Shikamaru are newly joined ANBU members and all placed on a team with Itachi and things go from there.

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stars in our eyes as we dream of the heavens (the gods walk among us, sweet child, do not forget) - snickiebear || ao3 || kakasaku || T || age-swap AU || oneshot complete

“Kakashi-sensei,” Naruto whispered, staring at his teacher, horror plain on his face. “You’re married?” Lazily, Kakashi looked down at his gloveless hand where his ring rested, “It would appear so.”

Sakura is born in the same generation as Kakashi and turns out as a badass ANBU married to him. This is super wholesome as it's a lot of the two of them bonding with Kakashi's genin team (Sai makes three) in an effort to help them out. It's a series so you can read more of the events taking place prior to the fic.

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Anachronistic Drift  - Elesrea  || ffn || gen || T || time travel AU || incomplete

Her plan was flawless. Save Shisui. Save the world. Time-travel, Sakura-centric AU

Sakura spends years training to be sent back in time and save the world from Sasuke. She isn't in ANBU, but rather poses as one in order to keep an anonymous status on her doings both in and out of the village.

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Sakura - lilac haze || ffn/ao3 || M || minasaku || time travel AU || complete

AU. Non-Canon. Time Travel. Please see inside for full warnings. Cross posted on Ao3. On his deathbed he was granted eternal peace and place to rest for all of time. Of course that was not appealing to him. Ever unpredictable to the end he had a counter offer. One that the Sage had to consider. In which Sakura's going to have a rough time. A really rough time.

Sakura is probably one of my all time favorite fics because the emotions are just spectacular. The story is pretty heavy on ANBU and ROOT aspects, which I always enjoy, but I wouldn't say it's a major focus. However, there is an emphasis on the unfair treatment towards kunoichi. Anyway, the characterizations and storytelling are beautifully done. Please share this author some love.

Check TWs before hand!!

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Hope y'all enjoy these recs, and please feel free to send me some if you have any!!!! I really appreciate when you do :)

[makeitmingi]

The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 2]

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho

Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?

Word count: 3.3K

"Nice to be acquainted with you. My name is Yunho... No, no. It's nice to meet you. Call me Yunho!... That's so awkward... Thank you for making the time. My name is Mr Jeong Yunho." Yunho planted a fake grin. He let out a groan as he processed his own words, falling onto his steering wheel.

*TAP TAP*

"Yunho... Are you okay?" Hongjoong stood outside, a questioning look on his face. Yunho sat up, blinking as he stared at the oldest of the group.

"Hey, hyung. I'm fine." Yunho said, getting out of the car. He grabbed his bag and coffee mug before locking the vehicle.

"Wow. You've... dressed up." Hongjoong scanned the outfit that Yunho had put on.

"I have to look like the owner of a restaurant right? I picked a colour that exudes confidence! Is it too much?" Yunho's eyes widened in fear as he paused in his tracks.

"You're fine, Yunho. Chill. You look nice. Don't worry." Hongjoong patted the taller on the shoulder. Yunho unlocked the door to the place.

"Thanks for being here, hyung." Yunho smiled gratefully, putting his bag behind the counter and placing his coffee mug on one of the booth seats. Hongjoong nodded with a hum. Mingi would kill him if he had left Yunho alone.

"Are you nervous?" Hongjoong asked.

"Not nervous about meeting new people. More nervous about it not working out. What are we going to do if things don't work out? I'll be without a kitchen crew!" Yunho panicked.

"Okay, breathe. Yunho, everything will be fine. I'm sure things will work out. If they don't, we'll find a way." Hongjoong assured.

"You're right. Be positive!" Yunho fist pumped and smiled. Hongjoong gave an encouraging nod.

"So what should I do until they come? Clean the kitchen? Prepare some drinks? Order food?" Yunho asked, rubbing his palms against the side of his dress pants.

"There's no need to do or prepare anything. The kitchen is practically empty with barely any equipment and no one has been there so there's no need to clean now. They probably have their own food and drinks, they're a group of chefs. Just collect yourself, take a deep breath. You're just having a talk." Hongjoong chuckled.

"I'm gonna make a pitcher of some drink before they come. That's the only thing I know I won't mess up." Yunho said.

"Okay but they're not coming yet so occupy your mind with something else." Hongjoong waved him off. In the end, Yunho went to unpack some other stuff.

"Thanks for helping me get such nice plates at a good price, hyung." Yunho looked at the packaged plates fondly.

"No worries. I guess it's good that I did a lot of co-curricular activities, huh?" Hongjoong laughed.

"You're a lot better at this than me..." Yunho spoke, slightly sullen, leaning his hands on on the edges of the cardboard box. Hongjoong turned around, looking at his friend.

"What? That's not true..."

"Isn't it? You have the connections to find a kitchen crew. The only person I was able to find ghosted me. You were the one that knew where to get all these cool plates and stuff for the restaurant. I didn't even know where to get white coffee cups!" Yunho said.

"Yunho. This is your first time doing this. No one is expecting you to know everything or be an expert restaurateur. It is a learning process for all of us." Hongjoong comforted.

"Sure, I knew where to get pretty plates. But you managed all the contracting the design yourself." He continued.

"Still..." Yunho's lips curled in doubt.

"Really, no one else has as much energy as you to do so much on your own. It's the golden retriever energy only you have." He laughed. Yunho pouted at his teasing.

"Thanks, hyung." Yunho said. When the time drew closer to the meeting, Yunho prepared a pitcher of a mixed drink.

"I don't have much ingredients..." Yunho rubbed the back of his neck.

"What are you going to put in it then?" Hongjoong peered over the counter curiously. Yunho sighed, turning to the small bar fridge and what he had on the shelf. Luckily he had stocked some items already so it wasn't entirely empty.

"Black currant syrup, club soda, lime and mint. That's a drink I can make with what I have." He said, putting everything on the counter. He poured each component into the pitcher.

"Does it taste okay?" He poured a bit for Hongjoong to try.

"That's actually good." Hongjoong nodded in approval. Yunho let out a sigh of relief and went to get some clean glasses.

*DING*

Yunho's head shot up like a meerkat on alert when he heard the bell by the door jingle. He felt his heart racing but he willed himself to not parkour over the counter.

"Seonghwa." Hongjoong made the first move, giving Yunho about 5 seconds to recover.

"Yunho, come here." Hongjoong hissed but maintained a friendly smile. Yunho realised that he must have zoned out when they exchanged pleasantries and it was now his turn. He cleared his throat and went over to your group. You eyed him cautiously as he smiled brightly, almost too bright in your opinion.

"Hi! I'm Jung Yunho!" He said, wincing inwardly when he realised that he probably sounded too animated. His eyes fell on you, the only girl amongst the group.

"I'm (y/n). Nice to meet you." You weren't emotionless, more stoic. There was a cool aloofness about you.

"Likewise. Thank you for meeting us on such short notice." Yunho shook your hand.

"Weren't we the ones who requested the meeting?" You asked with a slightly raised eyebrow. The male beside you stifled a laugh while Seonghwa cleared his throat, nudging the male.

"Wooyoung, one of the sous." The laughing male introduced with a fake smile but made no effort to shake Yunho's hand.

"Jongho. Prep chef." The last male introduced.

"So that makes (y/n) here, our head chef. She doesn't like titles so she never introduces herself with them." Seonghwa placed his hands on your shoulders, moving you to the front of the group. You turned to shoot him a dirty look.

"P-Please! Let's sit down! Help yourself to some refreshments." Yunho gestured, realising you were all still standing around. You sat together at one of the tables.

Yunho and Hongjoong on one side while Seonghwa, you, Wooyoung and Jongho sat opposite them.

"Did you make this?" Jongho asked, taking a sip of the drink.

"Yes, it's all I had in stock so far! So it may not be the best." You watched as Yunho's shoulders deflated slightly, almost reminding you of a sad puppy.

"It's good. Like the muddling of mint and lime." Wooyoung said. He handed you a glass to take a sip.

"So, I saw from Seonghwa's LinkedIn that you guys participate in a lot of pop ups and professional kitchens?" Hongjoong asked.

"Oh, that's way outdated. Here. This is the full list of the places we have worked as a team." Seonghwa took some papers out and slid them over to Yunho and Hongjoong. They flipped through it together. The subsequent look of awe that Yunho gave all of you made the corners of your lips curl up slightly.

"I guess we want to know more about your restaurant here. Seonghwa shared some things but it would be good if you could reiterate. What's expected of us?" You spoke.

"Well, this place will be a cafe in the morning. Then at night, I would like to have it as a restaurant." Yunho cleared his throat.

"What cuisine?" Jongho followed up.

"There's no set cuisine. I want customers to be able to experience all types of dishes, whatever is in the market. Like an omakase? But of course, we don't need michelin dishes." He explained shyly.

"I see. That sounds interesting, I can get behind an omakase concept. Well, Mr Jung-"

"Please call me Yunho." He blurted.

"Right, Yunho... The main concern right now is that, we know the... situation that you are currently in, in that there will only be 4 of us in the kitchen. My team and I are concern over the workload. Cafe stuff in the morning then dinner at night." You informed.

"I completely understand. What do you propose is the best solution?" Yunho asked. Hongjoong turned to look at Yunho, why was he asking you this when he was the owner?

"You're asking me? Can you share how many cakes and pastries you are planning to have? Or dinner dishes?"

"Well, a variety would be good. 3 baked items and 3 cakes? I have not thought about quantities of dinner dishes." Yunho confessed.

Hongjoong wanted a facepalm, Yunho was being way too honest now. But he couldn't outwardly react and make Yunho doubt himself. All he could do was sit there and watch this unfold.

"What about barista duties?" Wooyoung asked.

"My friends and I will take turns. They'll be the wait staff at night." Hongjoong said.

"They've also volunteered to help in the kitchen if and when necessary!" Yunho added, nodding with a grin.

"I think I understand a bit more." You said, eyes shifting to Seonghwa. Seonghwa met your gaze, giving a subtle nod.

"Can we see the kitchen?" Seonghwa requested. Yunho nodded, almost too excitedly. He stood up and jogged over to where the kitchen is, turning the lights on for the 4 of you to walk around. The kitchen was big, the counters, fume hood, ovens and fridges were definitely new.

"There's no much here right now except for the basics but if you all decide to work here, I'll put in an order for more equipment that you will need." Yunho said.

"It's a big space. And the walk in is decent." Wooyoung told you. You nodded your head.

"Is it okay if I confer with my team in here for a while?" You turned to Yunho, who blinked in surprise.

"Y-Yes! Of course! Take all the time you need." Yunho smiled and left with Hongjoong. Just as you were going to speak, the door opened slightly and Yunho left the pitcher of drink in there for you.

"He's a weird one." Wooyoung noted.

"Coming from you?" Jongho raised an eyebrow, making Wooyoung roll his eyes. You leaned against the counter.

"He's definitely... chipper. An interesting character. But does he not remind you of an overgrown puppy though?" You chuckled. The 3 boys looked at you, you have never had such a laugh or 'positive' reaction when meeting someone for the first time.

"I mean, sure?" Even Seonghwa, who has known you the longest, didn't know how to react. He thought you would be annoyed by Yunho's... clumsiness?

"That aside, thoughts on this?" You asked them. You were never one to be the first to share, more a listener than speaker.

"The idea of omakase is definitely fun. We always appreciate having creative liberty." Jongho said.

"And the owner seems... nice enough. I don't know if he just doesn't know, is desperate or kind. Letting us choose what equipment we need right from the get go?" Wooyoung scoffed.

"Maybe a little bit of all 3, Woo." You shrugged.

"I'm still thinking about the workload." Seonghwa said, refilling his glass with more of the drink Yunho made and taking a sip.

"The only work around I see from it... It's going to change our sleeping schedules for sure." You voiced out, making all of them look at you. You didn't have a sleeping schedule to begin with, which was why Seonghwa was always worried and he had to make sure that you even got some sleep at night.

"Before Hwa goes off on me not even having a sleep schedule to begin with, you know I mean more for you guys than myself." You held a hand up.

"You don't sleep so of course you don't have a sleeping schedule." Seonghwa scoffed.

"I do sleep, Hwa. I'm not a vampire." You glared.

"Anyway, do share what you had in mind." Wooyoung encouraged.

"We come in before dinner to start the prep. Get through dinner service then before we leave, prep batter and dough for the pastries. Those always need resting and refridgeration anyway." You started.

"Then we come back in the morning before opening and bake off the pastries. Once those are done, we do the 3 cakes, it shouldn't take us long. After that, we'll leave to rest for the day before coming back to prep for dinner." You finished.

"Hang on, before we say anything about what (y/n) just suggested, I just realised, we haven't asked about opening hours and day offs." Jongho raised his hand.

"That's true. Let's have some suggestions for the owner regarding that before we enquire." You crossed your arms.

"What sort of suggestions?"

"Any." You shrugged.

"I would suggest, Thursdays close to prepare for the weekend rush and Mondays close to rest from the weekend rush. If he doesn't want two days of closure, Sunday half day. We'll do brunch."

"That's not a bad idea." You thought about it before nodding.

"We passed a church on the way so Sunday is good to have brunch. And since Monday is work and school day, not many people will be out looking for dinner spots. If not, do a half day Monday. People are tired from Monday blues, they won't go out for dinner after work. But they will stop by for coffee and a muffin before work." He said.

"Wow, I don't think I've ever heard Wooyoung hyung speak with so much sense before." Jongho snorted, making Wooyoung slap his shoulder. But when Jongho squared up, he ducked.

"Seonghwa hyung! Help!" Wooyoung hid behind the oldest.

"This is why no one can take us seriously." You rubbed your temples, shaking your head.

"Ah, don't say that! If you didn't love us, you would have kicked us out AGES ago." Wooyoung grinned, hugging your arm. You rolled your eyes with a sigh.

"Well, that aside, what do you guys think? About working here." You asked as Wooyoung continued to cling to you.

"Not as shady as I thought it would be." He said.

"I don't mind it... I guess. It's hard to know what to expect when even the owner doesn't seem to know what to expect." Jongho spoke. Seonghwa nodded slowly, agreeing with what Jongho said.

"What about you, (y/n)?" Seonghwa asked back, knowing you would ask him first.

"I say we give it a shot. This is definitely not like our usual professional kitchens, we'll probably be sourcing suppliers and produce vendors on our own but it's a challenge. It'll be like our own start up kitchen." You said honestly.

"Then we'll try it. I think we should propose a trial period for both the owner and us then we confer again." Seonghwa suggested. The rest of you nodded.

"Yeah, I think the owner is already scared of my precious girl here." Wooyoung pinched your cheek.

"I barely said anything."

"Exactly." Seonghwa laughed. After that, you exited the kitchen. You saw Yunho wiping the counter relentlessly, as if there was a stain that wouldn't go off. You tilted your head, letting out a small laugh.

"Psst." Hongjoong smacked Yunho's head when he saw you walking out. Yunho straightened up and tossed the cloth aside.

"Please." Yunho nervously gestured for you all to resume your seats from earlier.

"A few things were discussed during our talk. We would like to ask about off days here? What will be the opening and closing hours of the place." Jongho asked.

"Not that I have not thought about it but I was actually wanting to discuss that with all of you. To find out what timing works best for your crew since it is going to be long shifts. But regular hours will be 8am to 2pm then we break and come back at any time to prepare for dinner. First dinner service is 6pm?" Yunho spoke.

"That's fair. Wooyoung?" You turned to the male on your right.

"I proposed Thursdays off to prepare for the weekend. Then either a half day on Sunday or Monday." Wooyoung leaned forward.

"Reason?" Hongjoong asked.

"Sunday, we were thinking of doing a brunch menu. With the next day being a working day, hardly anyone will be out for dinner on Sunday." Wooyoung reasoned.

"And after a gruelling Monday, no one will want to stay out for dinner. It'll be a break from the weekend rush as well." He continued.

"I agree to closing on Thursdays. As for Sunday or Monday... I think a brunch menu on Sunday is a good idea. Between the two, the reasons both make sense. But I'm leaning towards a half day on Monday." Yunho said.

"So the schedule we are thinking of working with is; dinner service. Then we prepare pastry batter and/or dough for the night. Come in early, bake those off and the cakes." You informed.

"We should be done by the morning and we'll leave to rest before returning for dinner service prep." Seonghwa finished.

"That sounds good." Yunho turned to Hongjoong for confirmation. The smaller nodded.

"If you could draw up a contract for a temporary period of work, for both your side and our team to test the waters, it would be greatly appreciated." You spoke.

"Y-Yes! I mean, sure." Yunho smiled, coughing as he realised how overly enthusiastic he sounded.

"We look forward to working with you." The 4 of you stood up, shaking hands with Hongjoong and Yunho.

"Us too. Thank you." Hongjoong and Yunho bowed gratefully. Seonghwa eyed you and the way you were subtly studying Yunho, you were curious about the tall, overgrown puppy.

"So we'll see you in 2 days? I'll have the contract drawn up by tomorrow." Yunho's eyes sparkled, unable to hide his excitement. You nodded and grabbed your things. After exchanging numbers, Seonghwa's hand came to rest on your lower back as he guided all of you out of the restaurant.

As you walked out, you caught a glimpse of Yunho. He was laughing animatedly, jumping up and down with his arms around Hongjoong while Hongjoong seemed uncomfortable with the hug, trying to push Yunho away.

"Thank you, hyung!" He yelled, fist pumping. You couldn't help but snort out a small laugh.

"Well, boys. Looks like we've got our work cut out for us." You said.

"Shall we go to (y/n)'s for drinks?" Jongho asked. You nodded with a shrug, the boys were always over at your place to eat and drink. They'd rather get drunk at your house than in public.

"I don't think I've ever seen you so amused by an individual you've just met. Are you actually charmed by him?" Seonghwa asked you.

"No, I'm not." You denied.

"Liar." Seonghwa coughed. You shot him a look while he looked away innocently. You rolled your eyes, walking with him at the back as Wooyoung and Jongho walked in front of you, the both of them engrossed in their own conversation.

"He's just... different. I mean, Woo is energetic but he's a whole new level. He's so... positive." You shrugged.

"Well, my darling, not everyone is as broody and scary as you are. Some people actually enjoy their life." Seonghwa laughed, lacing fingers with you.

"I do enjoy my life. And I'm not broody." You frowned.

"Sure..."

"Hey, you're equally as scary as me. You made the kids at the playground cry when we were little. You're lucky I even wanted to be your friend." You scoffed, swinging your interlocked hands.

"I only made them cry because they were bullying you. They didn't let you have a turn on the swing." He defended.

~

Series masterlist

[batneko]

A short fic about Sanji and Reiju and gender.

-

It was not unusual for Reiju to find one of her brothers in her quarters. Even now, they had a lack of boundaries and a fondness for juvenile pranks. But none of it bothered her, really, and letting them get it out of their system got them out of her hair faster. So she didn't change her footsteps as she became aware of the presence in her bedroom, letting her heels clack on the floor and opening the outer door slowly enough that the hinges creaked.

She had not at all been expecting to see this particular brother.

“Sanji,” Reiju said, surprised. He was sitting at her makeup table, a handful of products in front of him, and when he saw her he shoved them aside and covered his face, though Reiju had already caught a glimpse of it in the mirror. “Are you… What are you doing?”

There was a pause, just a moment too long, and Sanji lowered his hands.

He was smiling, though it looked pained. “I thought it would be funny,” he said. There was lipstick on his teeth. “To- to see how bad I would look in your makeup. And I was right! It's hilarious, isn't it?”

His laugh came out like a sob.

“Who… who would ever think a man could wear this stuff? It's just ridiculous, isn't it? I- I should show the others. How funny it is.”

Bright blue eyeshadow was smeared across his eyelids, bubblegum pink lipstick on his mouth, and coral blush mismatched on his cheeks. Blotchy glitter highlights completed the look, such as it was.

Silence filled the room for several long seconds.

“Mm,” Reiju said, thoughtfully. “Yeah, makeup is pretty hard if no one ever sat down and taught you.”

She pulled over the poofy footstool at the end of her bed and opened a drawer, taking out a packet of wipes and a few little bottles.

“Let's clean all that off first, and start from scratch.”

“I just. It's just a joke.”

“I know,” Reiju said. She pulled out a wipe and took hold of his chin. “Close your eyes.”

Sanji obeyed, sitting there obediently as his sister cleaned his face. They both ignored the way his breath hitched with held-back tears.

“Okay,” Reiju said. “We'll start by prepping your skin. You're a smoker, and a chef, so you really cannot moisturize too much.”

“Men don't need to do that stuff,” Sanji muttered, words slightly slurred by her vice grip on his face.

“More men should,” Reiju said firmly. “They’ll age much more gracefully, and no one likes kissing chapped lips.”

“That… that's true…”

“Yes it is,” Reiju said.

She finished rubbing moisturizer on him, and moved on to eyes. “I like to do eyes before foundation, in case the eyeshadow drops on your cheeks. Today let's just go simple, is your heart set on the blue or do you want neutrals?”

“I- I don't care.”

“I'll use a cool-colored shimmer on top,” Reiju decided. “Eyeliner is optional for daytime looks, what do you think?”

“I don't care, this is… You decide.”

“Yes, then.”

After the eyes were done she moved on to primer and a sheer foundation, explaining each step, making sure Sanji learned every tip and trick - from pumping the wand to opening your mouth to make it easier not to blink. Sanji stopped protesting at some point, just sitting there and letting her use him as a dummy.

“There’s an advanced lesson on contouring if you ever want to learn that, but I think this is enough new information for one day.” She considered her work so far. “It's a good thing you and I have the same coloring. I'll let you know what products I use, but don't be afraid to experiment with new ones. And like I said, moisturize.”

“Okay,” Sanji said quietly.

“I'd do your lips but you're probably going to need a smoke soon, right?” She'd noticed his fingers shaking and gave him an easy excuse for it.

“I can wait a little longer,” Sanji said, surprising her. “Since. I'm already here, and you're already teaching me, so…”

Reiju smiled. “I like bold colors but you seem like more of a classical beauty type. Definitely go with a long-lasting one, maybe matte, but with the shimmer I think we want a gloss.” She grabbed his chin again, ignoring the bristles. “Open your mouth.”

When she was done, Reiju gave Sanji a quick powder, then surveyed the finished look. She sat back, and nodded to the mirror, indicating he should look for himself.

The fear in his eyes was almost painful to watch. This was her little sibling, the closest to her out of the pack of them, the one she'd already failed to protect once. If she hadn't pulled this off it might only hurt him worse.

Sanji swallowed and turned in the chair, facing the mirror.

His lips parted, slightly, and his inhale of breath wasn't quite a gasp.

“I… look…”

“Told you,” Reiju said, nodding. “Classical beauty.”

He swallowed again. “It's. It's not funny this time.”

“Of course it's not, you look great. Nothing comical about being a knockout.”

Sanji stared at his reflection for a long time, occasionally turning his head side-to-side to see the other angles.

“Do you want to stay here for a bit?” Reiju asked.

Sanji nodded, silently.

“Okay. I'm going to change in the next room, and then I'm going out.”

He nodded again. “If… I need to take this off before I go?”

Reiju got the wipes out again, and quickly explained how to use cold cream.

“Got all that?” Reiju asked.

Sanji nodded.

“Are you… good?”

“I'm okay,” Sanji said. He gave her a smile, awkward but more genuine than any she'd seen from him in a long time. “Thank you.” Softly he added, “For everything.”

“Any time,” Reiju said.

She hoped he knew she meant it.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Tabs give me superpowers

Berliners: Otherland has added a second date (Jan 28) for my book-talk after the first one sold out - book now!

"Lifehacking" is in pretty bad odor these days, and with good reason: a once-useful catch-all for describing how to make things easier has become a pit of productivity porn, grifter hustling, and anodyne advice wreathed in superlatives and transformed into SEO-compliant listicles.

But I was there when lifehacking was born, and I'm here to tell you, it wasn't always thus. Lifehacking attained liftoff exactly 19 years and 348 days ago, on Feb 11, 2004, when Danny O'Brien presented "Life Hacks: Tech Secrets of Overprolific Alpha Geeks" at the 0'Reilly Emerging Technology Conference (aka ETCON). I was there, and I took notes:

https://craphound.com/lifehacksetcon04.txt

O'Brien's inspiration was his social circle, in which people he knew to be no smarter or better or motivated than anyone else in that group were somehow able to do much more than their peers, in some specific domain. O'Brien delved deeply into these peoples' lives and discovered that each of them had merely ("merely!") gotten very good at using one or two tools to automate things that would otherwise take up a lot of their time.

These "hacks" freed up their practitioners to focus on things that mattered more to them. They accomplished the goal set out in David Allen's Getting Things Done: to make a conscious choice about which things you are going to fail to do today, rather than defaulting to doing the things that are easy and trivial, at the expense of the things that matter, but are more complicated:

https://gettingthingsdone.com/what-is-gtd/

One trait all those lifehacks shared: everyone who created a little hack was faintly embarrassed by it, and assumed that others who learned about their tricks would find them trivial or foolish. O'Brien changed the world by showing that other people were, in fact, delighted and excited to learn about their peers' cool little tricks.

(Unfortunately, this eventually opened the floodgates of overheated posts about some miraculous hack that turned out to indeed be silly and trivial or even actively bad, but that wasn't O'Brien's fault!)

I'm one of those people whom others perceive as very "productive." There are some objective metrics on which this is true: I wrote nine books during lockdown, for example. Like the lifehackers O'Brien documented in 2004, I have lots of little hacks that aren't merely a way of getting more done – they're a way to make sure that I get the stuff that matters to me (taking care of my family and my health, and writing books) done.

A lot of these lifehacks boil down to making your life easier. There's a spot on our kitchen counter where I put e-waste. Whenever I go out to the car, I carry any e-waste out and put it in a bag in the trunk. Any time I'm near our city dump, I stop and throw the bag into their e-waste bin. This is now a habit, and habits are things you get for free: I spend zero time thinking about e-waste, which means I have more time to think about things that matter (and our e-waste still ends up in the right place).

There's other ways I use habits to make my life easier: after many years, I learned how to write every day:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/22/walking-the-plank/

For longer-form works like novels, I "leave myself a rough edge," finishing the day's work in the middle of a sentence. That way I get a few words for free the next day, meaning I never start the day's work wondering which words I'll type:

https://locusmag.com/2014/01/cory-doctorow-cheap-writing-tricks/

One of the most powerful habits I've cultivated is to have a group of daily tabs that I open in a new browser every morning. The meat of this tab group is websites I want to check in with every day, either because they don't have RSS feeds, or because I want to make sure I never miss an update.

This tab-group habit started before RSS was widespread, when most of the websites I wanted to check in on every day didn't have feeds yet, and for many years, this group was just a set of daily reads. But over the years, I started throwing things in the tab-group that I needed to stay on top of.

My daily tabs are in a folder called "unfucked rota" (they were originally in a folder called "rota," which got corrupted and had to be reconstructed in a folder I called "fucked rota," until I finally took a couple hours off and got it in good running order, hence "unfucked rota"). As I type this, "unfucked rota" contains more than a hundred websites I visit every morning, but it also contains:

The edit-history pages for four Wikipedia entries I'm watching;

Chronological feeds of my books on Amazon and Audible, to catch counterfeits as they are posted;

The parent notification portal for my kid's school;

The mileage history for the airline I flew on yesterday (I'll delete this once the flight is posted);

The credit card history for a card I reported a fraudulent charge on (I'll delete this once the refund is posted);

The sell-pages for three products that are out of stock (I'll delete these once the products are in stock and ordered);

A bookmarked newest-first Ebay search for a shirt I like that has been discontinued by the manufacturer;

The new-survey-completed pages for my last two Kickstarters;

The courier tracking page for an item being shipped sea-freight to me from Asia.

The tail end of this unfucked rota changes all the time, but as you can tell, it's got a lot of stuff that would be time-consuming to build a whole new system to track, but which has a web-page that can be easily added to a daily, habitual check-in and then removed when it's not relevant anymore.

Some of these things have email notifiers or RSS feeds, but those are too easy to lose in the noise. I generally delete email from ecommerce sites unread, since 99.99% of the messages they send me are unsolicited marketing nonsense, not the "notify me when this is back in stock" message I do want to see (same goes for my kid's school, which sends me fifty unimportant messages for every message that I must reply to).

Most of the internet is still on the web, which means it can be bookmarked, which means that it takes me one second to add it to the group of things I'm staying on top of, and one second to remove from that group. I get up in the morning, middle-click the "unfucked rota" item in my bookmarks pane, make a cup of coffee, and then sit down and race through those tabs, close-close-close.

It takes less than a second to scan a tab to see if it's changed (and if I close a tab too quickly, the ctrl-shift-T "unclose" shortcut is there in muscle-memory, another habit). The whole process takes between one and 15 minutes (depending on whether there's anything useful and new in one of those tabs).

Tabs, like lifehacks, are also in bad odor. Everyone stresses about how many tabs they have open. It's even inspired Rusty Foster's excellent newsletter, Today In Tabs:

https://www.todayintabs.com/

But this is a very different way to think about tabs. Rather than opening a window full of tabs that need your detailed, once-off attention later, this method is about using groups of tabs so that you can pay cursory, frequent attention to them.

In a world full of administrative burdens, where firms and institutions play the "sure, we'll do that, but you're going to have to track our progress" game to get out of living up to their obligations, this method is a powerful countermeasure:

https://memex.craphound.com/2015/02/02/david-graebers-the-utopia-of-rules-on-technology-stupidity-and-the-secret-joys-of-bureaucracy/

My little tab habit is so incredibly useful, such a powerful way to seize back time and power from powerful actors who impose burdens on me, that I sometimes forget how, for other people, tabs are a symptom of a life that's spiraling out of control. For me, a couple hundred tabs are a symbol of a couple hundred tasks that I'm totally on top of, a symbol of control wrestled back from others who are hostile to my interests.

This isn't how tabs were "meant" to be used, of course. It's an example of the kind of "innovation" that comes from users repurposing things in ways their designers didn't necessarily anticipate or intend.

This is what Jonathan Zittrain meant by "generative" technology back in 2008, when he published his incredibly prescient The Future of the Internet: And How To Stop It:

https://memex.craphound.com/2008/07/22/zittrains-the-future-of-the-internet-how-to-save-the-internet-from-the-internet/

For Zittrain, "generativity" was the property of some technologies that let its users generate new, useful tools and solutions for themselves (this is very different from "generative AI!")

Zittrain described how "curated" computing systems, like mobile devices that relied on apps that couldn't be adapted by their users, were dead ends for generativity. 15 years later, the dismal world of apps has proven him right:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/24/everything-not-mandatory/#is-prohibited

To the extent that "lifehacking" is about doing more, rather than being more deliberate about what you accomplish, it can be harmful. I am not immune to the failure modes of lifehacking:

https://locusmag.com/2017/11/cory-doctorow-how-to-do-everything-lifehacking-considered-harmful/

But overall, using tabs as something I close, rather than something I open, is a source of comfort and calm for me. For one thing, ripping through a group of tabs every morning means that I don't have to worry about missing something if I go too fast. I'll get another chance tomorrow:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/27/probably/

Decades ago, Dori Smith dubbed her pioneering blog her "#Backup Brain":

https://web.archive.org/web/20020120231027/http://www.backupbrain.com/

At their best, our systems – be they physical, like a spot on the counter where the e-waste goes, or digital, like a tab-group – are "congitive prostheses." They allow us to move important things from the highly contested, busy and precious space between our ears and out there into the world:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/09/the-memex-method/

Like those lifehackers that O'Brien studied for his presentation in 2004, I confess to feeling a little silly about telling you all about this. For me, this habit of decades is so ingrained that it feels trivial and obvious. And yet, when I look at people in my life struggling to stay on top of a million nagging administrative tasks that could be easily watched through a morning's flick through a tab-group, I can't help but think that maybe some of you will find a useful idea or two in my unfucked rota.

I'm Kickstarting the audiobook for The Bezzle, the sequel to Red Team Blues, narrated by @wilwheaton! You can pre-order the audiobook and ebook, DRM free, as well as the hardcover, signed or unsigned. There's also bundles with Red Team Blues in ebook, audio or paperback.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/25/today-in-tabs/#unfucked-rota

[threecheersforsuccess]

I've been yapping for too many years, so I need a living masterpost of the guides and blogs from my Tumblr and Instagram. I feel some of my old work might be outdated, so please take my wording with a chunk of salt.

I'll update my with my content as I go.

Stuff from 2024

♡ What's in my bag? (2024)

My Motivation Education Video Series (2022-2023)

♡ Part 0: Something Much Needed Among Students: Motivation ♡ Part 1: Bare Bones Definition of Motivation ♡ Part 2: Self-efficacy, I think ♡ Part 3: Where is the control? ♡ Part 4: Reward or Autopilot ♡ Part 5: Determination to Continue ♡ Part 6: Personal Interest ♡ Part 7: Outside The Model ♡ Part 8: Where is the willpower? ♡ Part 9: Is stress even a bad thing? Note: I stopped because I did not like the short video format. I'm not sure if I may pick this up again, but I do think the lessons I learned from my readings are pretty neat :)

5am.Raining's Studying Challenge (2022)

Note: A challenge led by my cool mutual 5am.raining on Instagram. I slowly figure out how to make videos. It's a little wonky at the beginning, but I find my style! I made these posts in 2022 ♡ Poorly Filmed Day in My Life! ♡ My Studying Role Model... Haruhi from Ouran... ♡ Fave Leader in My Field: Carol Dweck ♡ What gets me in the mood to study? ♡ What I want to do with my degree... ♡ My Fave Reading Assignment ♡ Study Tunes ♡ How to get back into reading books ♡ Favorite study supplies ♡ Planning Routine (2022 version) ♡ Organizing My Desk ♡ What's in my backpack? ♡ Inspiring Film or Doc on My Field ♡ Imposter Syndrome ♡ "Study Buddy" ♡ Coping with Long Study Sessions

Flipd Productivity and Motivation Challenge Blogs

Note: I yapped so hard I won the productivity challenge. I wrote these around junior year of college (2021). ♡ Long-Term Destination, Short-Term Motivation: Living in The Moment ♡ Embedding Self-forgiveness in Your Self-Care ♡ Study Essentials ♡ The Importance of Play and Breaks ♡ Quote of Week Analysis: Self-Acceptance ♡ How I Plan My Everyday ♡ The Biggest Time Management Misconception I'm Trying to Get Over ♡ Recognizing Burnout (and Listening to Yourself) ♡ Building an Academic Support System ♡ Ways to Make Yourself Take Breaks ♡ The Challenges of a Positive Mindset ♡ How I Build Habits (based on James Clear's Atomic Habits)

Diana's Studying Challenge (2021)

Note: A challenge lead by my cool mutual dianas.desk on Instagram. I made these posts in 2021. Day 1: Challenge Introduction Day 2: What Gets Me Motivated Day 3: Cleaning My Desk Day 4: Study Tunes/Songs I Listen and Avoid Day 5: Current Books I'm Reading Day 6: Relaxation! Arknights Projekt Red Bullet Journal Spread Day 7: My Happy Place Day 8: Week Reflection Day 9: How I Plan Day 10: My Summer 2021 Work Routine Day 11: My Desk Essentials Day 12: Study Snack (Natto) Day 13: Digital or Paper Notes? Which is Better? Day 14: How I Self-Care Day 15: My School Bag Day 16: Proudest Achievement Day 17: Most Favorite Productivity App/Website Blocker Day 18: Work Buddies Day 19: Inspirational Quotes Day 20: My Favorite Place to Work Day 21: #MessyDesk Day 22: Guilty Pleasure Day 23: My Favorite Study Accounts Day 24: Study Methods I Do Not Like Day 25: Trying out a new place to work? Day 26: Part 2 of My Unconventional Study Tips (same as above) Day 27: My Outfit Day 28: Making a Gratitude List Day 29: My Aspirations Day 30: Today I learned… Day 31: September Goals

My Study Tips

Note: I wrote many of these either in 2020 or very early on (2017-2018). Super old stuff. ♡ Unconventional Study Tips Part 1 + Part 2 ♡ One Effective Memorization Tip ♡ Dealing with Bad Grades: What I Do ♡ How to get 800 on the SAT in Math and Full Points on Grammar ♡ Causes of Procrastination + Methods for Each ♡ How to Study When Unmotivated ♡ Making Your Discord Study Space ♡ Ways to Go to Bed Early ♡ My Super Ultimate Guide to AP Calc AB and BC ♡ Using Your Phone Productively (2018)

Journaling

♡ How I Journal (2017) ♡ How I Use My Notebooks (2018) ♡ How to Keep a Daily Journal (2020) ♡ How to Get into Creative Journaling (2022)

Dividers by @fairytopea

[thisisyesterdaystudy]

Monday 7th (first day back at it)

actually had the most productive day of my life possibly - i'm sure it will all fall apart tmrw i'm staying up way to late for my 5/6 hours sleep or whatever it was

Things I did

woke up in the AM (pretty good for me)

got ahead in biology, i got both today and tomorrow's topics done so i have more time to revise now which is good

got my sociology work done - that was the least exciting bit of my day, sort of did bare minimum

art history: studying jmw turner rn who i am not a bit fan of and in fact so much the contrary that i've been putting it off for 6 weeks but i put on a random classical music studying playlist and somehow that solved all my problems, i studied art hist the most today and i had a great time, it wasn't really the most efficient use of my time cos i was focusing all on turner biography type stuff when really the thing i should be focusing on is his paintings but i'm just glad to be motivated again

tour of the cell: this was good as extra consolidation for bio, didn't take me long which was good, i'd like to finish it this week but idk if that's possible

byzantine icons: had a very short section today but loved it looking forward to the rest - its very tenuous including this in my art history study time because its not really related to what i'm studying ever i'm just interested but idm

swedish: still enjoying learning swedish a lot - i think i just love being a beginner and i love starting things off, its probably the lack of pressure, like when i've been doing something for a long time there's so much attached to it emotionally - anyway, learned en tårta (a cake), got freaked out by en and ett nouns its cool

went climbing

wrote my daily essay on turner today no surprises there

did some knitting and some sketchbooking, the only things i have left to do today are read and plan tmrw which hopefully i'll do before i'll fall asleep but you'll never know

i wish i had a format for these things

Study Time

biology - 1h50m (inc. 30m extra course)

sociology - 50m

art hist - 4h (inc. 10m extra course + 2h essay research + writing)

swedish - 2h (haven't decided yet whether to include this in study time any input welcome idk what counts to me)

total compulsory - 6h

total extra - 2h40m

total - 8h40m

[nonsensical-pixels]

MY WEDDING TRAUMA: A SURELY-SIMS x ICE-CREAMFORBREAKFAST COLLABORATION, CONVERTED TO THE SIMS 2 [download - 👰🏽🤵🏽]

are you tired of brides in white dresses and toddlers with perfect pink flower baskets? is cereal packet gameplay just not doing it for you anymore? maybe you'd like your weddings to put the 'strange' in strangetown? search no more, the ingredients for the strangest wedding in sim nation are finally here!

so, since i caught that one virus, i've been playing around a bit more with ts2 cc creation and finally had the time to work on converting a big set again. but then... what to convert? the answer came to me in the links section of a random lookbook... in a sort of fever dream. a set that captures the recent theme on my blog, families, and yet completely destroys it at the same time: my wedding trauma.

everything here is remarkably versatile. i mean, i know for a fact that people aren't just going to use that jumpsuit for a wedding, elvis needs more freedom than that! there are 9 cas items and 6 buy items for a total of 17 items in this set!

the original ts4 collaboration is complete perfection; it has just the sort of trashy, nonsensical vibes that the ts2 wedding department is sorely lacking. my conversion of this isn't perfect, i'm still learning how to do clothing and there are some minor issues mentioned below the cut, but overall i think that it came out pretty good and i hope it invokes some chaos in your game. 💥

credits go to @ice-creamforbreakfast for most of the cas part of this collaboration, and to @surely-sims for the buy mode part!

keep reading for more info, rambles, and preview pics!

PART 1: BUY MODE (6 items by @surely-sims)

ITEMS INCLUDED ARE: 1 - Fancy Folding Chair - 1.7k polys 2 - Margarita Tower - 3.4k polys 3 - Pizza Party Banquet Table - 1.5k polys 4 - Tiki Mug - 1.7k polys 5 - Toasting Bucket - 2.3k polys 6 - Wedding Arch - 10.2k polys*

individual previews are also to be found in the download!

THINGS TO NOTE: - The wedding arch is quite high-poly compared to other objects (10k) but that is the max for the polycounts. - The collection file included in the 'Surely-Sims' folder should go in the Collections folder in Documents.

PART 2: CAS (8 items by @ice-creamforbreakfast and 1 by @surely-sims)

ITEMS INCLUDED ARE: 1 - Brandi Dress (YF-AF) - 3.9k polys 2 - Elvis Glasses (TU-EU) - 1.7k polys 3 - Elvis Jumpsuit (YM-AM) - 4.9k polys 4 - Goopy Jacket (TM-AM) - 2.3k polys 5 - Jess Hair (YF-EF) - 5.4k polys 6 - Kelly-Marie Hair (TF-EF) - 9.4k polys 7 - Malborough Dress (YF-AF) - 7.1k polys 8 - Newport Headpiece (YF-AF) 9 - Trashleen's Cigarette Bouquet (YF-EF) note: the Jess Hair is not part of the original set but is included because the Newport Headpiece is meant to pair with it.

individual previews are also to be found in the download!

THINGS TO NOTE: - The clothing may have some bone assignment issues (especially with straps) & mild gaps. - The 'Goopy Jacket' has a mild discoloration around the neckline. - All hairs are in @skittlessims Skittles Hair System - The 'Elvis Jumpsuit' is paired with 4t2 SP01 Pointed Stud. Converted by me :) - The 'Malborough Dress' is paired with Ice-CreamForBreakfast's Jessica Shoes.

PART 3: THANKS & RAMBLE

have one final pic of the quirky couple and their patchwork family (ex-wife and dog included) 💞

this set was such a rollercoaster to work on, but also so, so much fun! i hope you guys enjoy it as much as i do 🥺

for anyone who's wondering--yeah i'm back for now, requests are still closed, wips depend on whether im in the mood... but from now on releases should be less queued and have a more 'personal touch' 😏

i'll get around to posting the discord-exclusives i released while i was gone... eventually. there's a few that i'm keeping for myself x

anyway... happy simming, hope you enjoy these conversions, and have a lovely day simming! if you use these feel free to @ me, i wanna see the chaos and the cool stuff these are used in 🥰

love,

~ Ky (nonsensical-pixels)