#but idk what the crab would do

[housecow]

rolls for days!!!

[secretagentspydetectiveninja]

Redrawing some of my favourite "aromantic moments" from the games for Ace Attorney Aspec Week! (shush, pretend I'm not slightly late) @aspec-ace-attorney

There are definitely more than just these, these were the ones I could remember off the top of my head

As someone who comes from a marriage-heavy culture, seeing Edgeworth -- this respected, established, renowned character both in and out of universe -- firmly assert that it's something he doesn't want for himself is SO VALIDATING YOU HAVE NO IDEA

Dr Crab's line is just aro. I don't think there's any allo explanation for this one.

There are actually a fair few moments throughout the games where Phoenix internally comments on Maya's response to romance, but this one always stood out to me because it's the biggest mood of all time. No, I don't want romance. Yes, I want food. I understand Maya deeply in this moment.

Listen I know Asinine Attorney isn't technically canon but Apollo turning down Klavier was too iconic to miss. You're telling me a hot, sweet, rich rock star asks you out to dinner and you say NO??? ...Power move, Herr Forehead. I can respect it.

"Intellectually attracted" is hilarious because Lana doesn't even deny it. Ema is about 16 at this point and definitely knows what romance is. So considering that she somehow misses one of the most lesbian lines in the whole series, and her sister doesn't bother to correct her, I'm going with the "Ema is aro" explanation for it.

[aroanthy]

(anthytouga voice) why would i be compassionate to nanami ew disgusting nanami’s literally the worst nanami is a cockroach i hope she dies she’s so fucking stupid oh my god being compassionate to nanami is the worsttttttt so what if the worst things ever happen to her and it’s my fault that’s just lifeohhhhhhhhhhh oh? utena is experiencing the worst things ever and i helped? and i helped? oh well i should just kill myself. oh well i should just kill myself and save her because actually utena is Good. and stupid. but Good. unlike nanami lol nanami was born cursed to suffer haha nanami’s got that karmic punishment coming lollllll But Utena Does Not <3

[checkadii]

mfs do anything but finish their wips . like startign another, for example

[kabutone]

there are so many beautiful trans men in the world

[alebrijediscordico]

tbh i think a good middle point between user base and tumblr, if they really want to keep this new twitter copy dashboard, would be letting us go nuts with the dashboard ourselves,

like cmon, if they can change how things look every few months even if it makes 90% of the site mad, let us have two or three different dashboards on the same page, theres space for it. or maybe let us change the ui completely too, including colors, where everything is, how much space each thing covers—maybe if you want to take it a step further, let people use a little html here and there to fill up empty spaces-

that way you can have your "easy" dashboard for new users, but also give old users (or hell, anyone who has been here at least a month) something we might actually like for once

[pepprs]

gonna delete this later bc i know it’s unproductive to screenshot / namedrop and i actually am thinking the best approach would just be to privately share this thought w the dev who posted this in a possibly futile attempt to effectively advocate for the change i want to see (#worktag2 lol). but im workshopping it here w my beloved mutuals first as i always do which is kinda shooting myself in the foot given that the devs can probably see that but whatever. my thought is like… i get it. i really do. i get that this place needs to stay afloat and some of that is gonna involve sacrifice or something from everyone involved. but… why would you try to snuff out the things that make this place what it is and just make it like all the other places. why would you not even take into account how the changes are going to impact EXISTING users who are loyal even if they don’t pay. people aren’t going to come to tumblr for more tiktok and instagram. they’re going to come here for tumblr. for the anonymity and the customization and whatever. so like i just don’t get it. why is the solution to this problem to experiment with changes **that existing users won’t like** and not to listen to what existing users want and do more of it bc other ppl likely will want that too.

[crab-crab]

Hyrule, my beloved, why are you so hard to pick a monster for? All the other riders were so easy to pick for minus Wild but I am just stumped with yours.

[bingobongobonko]

weeps. why is yves such a piece of shit asshole. i love you yves.

[violets-to-daisies]

you don’t know me.

[graviticdeeds]

Keep wanting to make art of a horseshoe crab Hylics OC but keep not feeling like making art

[fanghur]

Hey @staff why and what the fuck are the random sounds and ads(?) that play when I open my dashboard that have no visual aspect/video and I can’t mute without muting the whole tab?

Edit, it’s not just dashboard

[milkloafy]

THE WAY TO THE HEART — DAN HENG

⋆｡˚ ❀ summary: after saving penacony, you want to take a break and sit out of the next mission. you decide you should send dan heng off with a little homemade lunch before his travels. ⋆｡˚ ❀ contents: fluff, gn!reader, established relationship ⋆｡˚ ❀ wc: 0.8k ⋆｡˚ ❀ a/n: i don’t even like cooking but i want to cook for dan heng idk whats gotten into me >.> also!! idk what is happening after penacony i haven’t even finished penacony HSDJHGSK i’m making this up!! pls enjoy!!

Since you and Dan Heng started dating, there weren’t many mission you didn’t take part in together. However, after the events of Penacony, you decided you wanted to recuperate both your mental and physical health in the comfort of the Astral Express.

Dan Heng, who wanted to see more of the Xianzhou fleets decided he would go on the next mission. While you knew you would miss him, you were excited for him to have some more fun experiences with the crew. 

You decided you would send him off with a grand gesture. And what better way to someone’s heath than food? 

You weren’t the best chef in the world, but you could hold your own in the kitchen. At least, compared to Himeko and her coffee.You had planned to whip up a lunch box full of fried rice—with rock crab included to spice up the flavor—comfort food, and some izumo miso. Simple, but effective. Besides, what truly mattered is how cutely it was presented! With neatly shaped fried rice and sauce making little hearts and smiley faces on the food, Dan Heng was bound to love it.

Before Dan Heng was to depart for the next Xianzhou fleet, you gave him a big hug and handed him a nice lunch box.

“Everything is in an insulated container but it only holds the heat for twenty-four hours,” you stated as he graciously accepted the meal. “Try to eat it while it’s still warm!”

He nodded, ruffling the top of your head affectionately. “Will do. Make sure you get a lot of rest while you’re here. Message me if you get scared at night.”

You laughed despite how grateful you were for his offer. Being apart for long periods of time may be hard but at least you knew Dan Heng would always be there for you. 

“I’ll try to be brave without you,” you teased. “Now go, you should catch up with March 7th and Caelus. And remember—try to stay safe.”

“I’ll return to you in one piece,” he assured with a hint of amusement in his tone.

“You better!”

“I promise.”

— ❀ —

By the time Dan Heng was able to sit down and at, it was night time and he was in his hotel room after a long day out. Worriedly, he pulled the lunch you packed him out of his bag. 

Dan Heng recalled you telling him it would only be kept warm for twenty-four hours, and it was well over thirty now. Still, he was certain it would taste just as good since it was made with love and effort from you. Besides, microwaves existed on the Xianzhou if worst came to worst.

He removed all the lids from the containers and a whiff of some of his favorite foods filled his senses. Dan Heng’s stomach finally growled after the tiring day he had. 

Before he dug in, he noticed a piece of paper taped to a lid. Dan Heng chuckled to himself, knowing it was none other than a secret note from you. If he were only a tad less attentive, he wouldn’t have even noticed it was there.

Dan Heng opened it up.

You found me! c: 

A smile was immediately placed on Dan Hengs face. Oh, how he missed you already. It was too late at night to call you now—he didn’t want to disturb your rest, but he would certainly message you after he finished reading your note.

By the time you’re reading this, the food is probably cold, isn’t it?

He chuckled sheepishly. You knew him too well at times.

It’s okay though. I give you permission to microwave it just this once <3

I hope the first day of your mission went well. Not too many fights today, I hope? No Vidyadhara form required yet? Don’t overexert yourself, okay?

Now…enjoy your cold food and remember to take care of yourself! I love you and you’re super cool B) 

With Love,

Y/N

P.S. Don’t forget to message me~ ily!

Dan Heng took a sip of your miso soup with a smile and pulled out his phone to send you a message right away. He wished you were able to come wit him, but he understood perfectly the need for a mental health break.

[giftboxxworld]

IS THIS. MY FAVORITE SUMMERTIME AESTHETIC COMBINED WITH PIZZA TOWER????? HELLO THATS PEPPINO IN A REAL ACTUAL FANCY CHEF UNIFORM COOKING DELICIOUS SEAFOOD?????? OH MY G THIS IS SO STUNNING 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT YOUR ART ITS SO GOOD AND ABSOLUTELY STUNNING 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

Salt and Sea

[incorrectbatfam]

On the subject of Damian and the axolotl, I feel like people do send him pictures of animals and stuff and he gives a rating, idk tho

Stranger: I thought you'd like to know that Lacey had her puppies. *sends a pic*

Damian: For once, a mother who should be proud. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a derpy cat pic* This is my cat Momo, short for Movie-Theater Mozzarella-Sticks. He just turned 3 and likes to eat pillow feathers.

Damian: Truly the cat of all time. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I think I saw Krypto the Superdog on my way to work. *sends blurry video of Krypto flying*

Damian: There goes Metropolis's hero. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a pic of a lizard in a pointy hat* This is King Gizzard, my lizard, as a wizard for Halloween.

Damian: I would give him all my candy. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a video of their parrot*

The parrot: Polly loves crackers and Damian.

Damian: Tell Polly I love her too. 10/10.

——————���

Stranger: Bruh there are so many gophers at Gotham U. *sends pic of gophers chilling in the quad*

Damian: 10/10. Good for them, living their best life.

———————

Stranger: Do fish count? If so here's Bubbles. *sends video of a goldfish*

Damian: They absolutely do. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I went to my aunt's farm and got to ride the horses. Meet Dash. *sends Instagram story with a horse*

Damian: A fine specimen. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Opinions on this stingray? *sends scuba diving footage*

Damian: Superb. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I found a worm. What should I name him? *sends pic*

Damian: He looks like a Kevin. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: This is me and my stepdad with the hens we've been raising. *sends pic*

Damian: What lovely ladies. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I went to a butterfly garden today. *sends video of a butterfly landing on their hand*

Damian: Stunning. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I just got back from a safari. *sends album of savannah herds*

Damian: Next time take me with you. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends a Ratatouille GIF*

Damian: Don't tell my family but I'm training my rats to do the same. 10/10 by the way.

———————

Stranger: This is Herbie, our class bunny. *sends a pic with the teacher fumbling in the background*

Damian: He looks more intelligent than your teacher. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: *sends pic* Got bored and bought a frog. I'm naming him Toad.

Damian: I hope your life is as dull as ever. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Tzu Tzu keeps leaving her laundry everywhere. *sends video of a snake shedding its skin*

Damian: You're her assistant. Do your job. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I finally got a hamster!! *sends video*

Damian: Now treat them like royalty and get yourself some tubing. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: Ideas for decorating my hermit crab's shell? For context his name is Juan and he likes the color yellow. *sends pic*

Damian: I suggest black and gold. 10/10.

———————

Stranger: I saw a turtle on my morning walk. *sends a pic*

Damian: Ethereal. 10/10.

———————

Bruce: *sends a family photo*

Damian: *blocks and reports*

[maryland-officially]

IM A MINOR!!!! A MINORRRRRR!!!!!!!

Please do not sexualize our gimmick. Not only is this triggering, but we will send it to all our friends to laugh at.

Look look, we're best friends!! :D

Oh, and I'm president :33

Please don't send me chain asks!!

If you're plural or questioning plurality, join my tumblr community. Accepting of ALL plurals: https://www.tumblr.com/join/Q5XviKY6

Anti-endos who are anti-endo because they don't understand how an endogenic system would form go here

^ and others curious! -willow

CRAB ARMY:

@marscrab-real @marscrab

@i-am-the-crab

@the-clown-crab

@am-i-a-crab

@actually-ao3

@terrencecrab

@washington-offical-2

@narcissas-wildroses

@real-microsoft-outlook

@how-many-crab

@c0rvid-19

@wikipedia-the-official

@real-microsoft-outlook

@laiciffo-dnalyram

@secretly-a-goose

DNI: PROSHIP? (ESPECIALLY PEOPLE WHO BELIEVE THIS IS OKAY IRL), PEOPLE WHO THINK KIDS CAN CONSENT, RADFEMS (the terfs), I DON'T KNOW WHAT 'PRO CONTACT'IS, BUT I DON'T FUCKING LIKE IT -- ANYONE WHO THINKS IT'S OKAY TO FLIRT WITH KIDS. PEOPLE WHO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF REGRESSION. FUCK YOU. ANYWAY!

DISEASES I CARRY:

- Vampirism

- Rabies

- Cat-boy disease? idk im a were-cat I guess

- ultra flu

- botchalism??

- smallpox

- burger disease

- coming soon

I fully thank my parent, Gmail, for every one of my successes. every one.

|_ Maryland what the fuck. that's creepy.

We are traumagenic plural (we think) and we are very pro endo please don't be mean ^^ ;;