#but i guess i also inherented them from my dad

[eldritchmochi]

i have the seasons soup mugs from 2000, which are squatter and wider than your average coffee mug by a significant amount, and also dont have that eyecatching label design, so it doesnt really look like a novelty *coffee* mug

the thing that im so baffled by about it is the bit about how this mug (at one point mugs, but one got lost in a move) have always been with my bowls, always on a different shelf than my regular mugs, frequently in a different cabinet from both my regular mugs and my standard glasses, AND i pretty much always give specific directions on where to find glasses for water because my kitchen organization isnt quite intuitive compared to a lot of people's since, while im tall, i have hella joint issues that means common use items have to be as low as possible. how people always go to the wrong cabinet and without fail unearthed my damn soup mug from behind other shit where i stash it because its not common use, i havent the foggiest

i have much more eyecatching and goofy coffee mugs *right there*, and currently my glasses are really cool too so why??

[mossyeyeballs]

TW: mentions of pretty much everything terrible. 🍇, trafficking, all of the above.

CLASS OF 09 RANT, FLIP SIDE SPOILERS

Ok not my usual post (I’ve posted twice ik but shush) but what the freak was the flip side??….. I was a huge fan of class of 09 + the re up but this game was so.. what’s the word….. dog shit? Even if we ignore half of the game being about the creators weird foot fetish, the sl@ve ending was so unnecessary. I feel like the only thing in that route that was worth writing was the issue in retail work and that wasn’t even the star focus, let alone side focus. The main plot of that route was the counselor having some weird illegal 🌽 warehouse, jecka finding it, and then him blackmailing her into human 🚙 🚙 ing?

The only ending I thought was necessary IF THAT was when Jecka found Nicole after the sue a side ending from re up. I thought it did a decent job at talking about sue a side victims, and how nobody really cares about them until it’s too late, And even then they only care for a week or so and then move on.

But the Jeffery dying one was the most out of place in my opinion (unfortunately it beats the foot ending.) For starters, Nicole was really out of character imo, like yeah she’s talked about wishing Jeffery was dead before, but her actually killing him just out of boredom is so odd. Her entire character is “I don’t put effort into anything unless it benefits me.” Killing Jeffrey was not only ALOT of effort, but she gained absolutely nothing. On top of that, saying it’s different than doing. Like how she talked about wishing her mom was dead, but then when she had a heart attack, she panicked. Plus, she PLANNED on making Jecka take some of the blame on his death, which she stated in past games she wouldn’t do. She literally never put Jecka in harms way, let alone jail if it didn’t also benefit them both. But this didn’t, she just did it to do it.

While we’re talking about Nicole being out of character, I feel it valid to mention her and Jeckas dad. For obvious (and gross) reasons, I won’t be detailing this, but her doing that to Jecka wasn’t fully out of character, but still odd. Like I mentioned earlier, Nicole never really did anything to spite Nicole, so I find it odd that she did in this game. You could blame it on “oh she’s a sociopath she doesn’t care.” But I don’t think that’s inherently true. Yeah, I guess it’s canon she’s a sociopath, but in that case they do a bad job at consistency. She’s shown in both games 1 and 2 caring about people she’s close with, whether it’s Jecka, her mom, or even Emily in one segment. So I find it completely random that she did this to Jecka over something as small as not sharing how she got into foot work. Jeckas done much worse stuff to Nicole, and Nicole just didn’t care because they were friends, or didn’t feel the need to put effort into doing something if she did care. So yeah, Nicole basically screwing Jeckas dad over something so little felt out of character.

One of the few things that bothered me the least, but I feel the need to mention was the foot work stuff. Not because it was out of character, i fear I’ve seen worse stuff mentioned in that game. But I guess the way it was portrayed as less of a story plot and more of the creator trying to live out his fantasies. He himself has stated Jeffrey is basically a self insert, so the whole being sexually obsessed with Jecka and her feet felt REALLY weird. Compared to Nicole’s my space favor thing, this just felt dirty. For comparison. Both Jecka and Nicole took up sex work to keep a home life or lackthereof, they both got money from strangers to do sexual things, and they both hated doing it. But why did Jeckas feel so much more personal and gross? Because the actual sex work was shown. In graphic detail. And all of Jeffrey’s (the creators) personal thoughts were stated with no backlash. Jeffery literally asked Jecka if she would 🍒feed him, and he was excused. When Nicole was asked the same hing from the same guy, he was insulted, yelled at, even told to leave.

So, creepy creator who’s obsessed with his barely legal characters, Jecka being sold to 🚙 🚙ing agaisnt her will, Jeffrey being murdered for no reason other than a giggle or two from his haters, Jecka accidentally killing Ari cause she was drunk driving, feet fan service, and fan service in general aside, the game is left only with the regular drug and alcohol abusage we always see. which in the game that was advertised as a new experience felt really stale and honestly left me bored. The ONE SINGULAR time during this game that I giggled was when the hat man appeared in the Ari route.

If you’ve fully ignored everything I said in this, maybe didn’t care, or didn’t even read it. Id just like to mention for everyone that the creator of this game said that anybody who disliked him, his games, his writing, or his humor were kid diddlers. In full seriousness. So yeah, no shock this game was bad, but I guess I shouldn’t have expected better from someone who thinks his haters are all child likers. All this being said, I enjoyed class of 09, and the re up. I’m hoping the anime episode that comes out soon with be a decent save. all of THAT being said, I don’t support this creator. I don’t support his actions, I think he’s a shitty person who’s made some shitty jokes, but made some not so shitty games that I decently enjoyed. I also haven’t bought them, so none of my money has gone towards him or his projects. I in NO WAY support him. Thanks for reading.

Feel free to comment down some of your own opinions if you feel so inclined, I’m interested in what everyone else thought of this game :))

[captainuranium543]

Looking back erza and laxus had INSANE beef. Legit I counted and early on almost every single time he's on screen hes slandering her for no damn reason. I thought this was kinda funny cuz like, my man what is your damage??? But then I thought about it and it makes sense.

Imagine you are laxus at 15, your father is constantly preaching that the guild isn't strong enough and all these weaklings are dragging it down. You believe him of course because he is your father and obviously we all need to be strong, that's why dad forcibly implanted a lacrima into your skull because you needed to be stronger to remain in the guild. Then enter gods most pathetic kid who barely speaks, knows almost nothing about magic and looks like she's been run over by a bus a couple times and the master just, let's her in?? How on earth is that gonna make this guild stronger old man. Ivan was probably pissed and laxus just picked it up by extension.

Not only that this little jerk who should be like, inherently weaker then you by your fathers logic, manages to make s class only 2 years after you, making her the youngest wizard in fairy tail history to become an s class at 15 (cough a title that used to be yours).

Oh and also, as time goes on word spreads about how powerful she is and people start calling her titania queen of the fairies, while you are literally in line to inherit it. if anyone is the queen it should be you.

You finally have enough of this and at 23 years old you create this whole elaborate plan to become the guild master you hold the entire city hostage with a ring of insanely volatile lacrima around the city that will nuke whoever attacks them so they can't be removed from the sky. Perfect plan right? Wrong. That same fucking ginger destroys 89% of them even after you inform her that she will die she does it anyway and has the nerve to survive. That asshole.

Years later all that is behind you, sure you'd love to be guild master but the guild has disbanded and honestly you aren't totally sure you deserve it. You joined blue Pegasus with some of your buddies and it's going ok until suddenly a hoard of your old guildmates burst in and tell you fairy tail is back! Great news! Except who's the guild master? Well you're never gonna guess.

[lollytea]

Please, your finale Huntlow thoughts, my liege. We poor peasants beg of you, our bowls are empty and your tables full; if we might have but a crumb of your succulent meal to fill our bellies in these cold December nights.

ASGCDHBDJNK JESUS FUCKING CHRIST OKAY

I got a few asks about this but I guess I'll answer this one cuz it's phrased the funniest. I just wasn't too pressed about giving my Thoughts about finale Huntlow because I am fully a part of the Huntlow hivemind. Like I feel the way everyone else feels. I'm ecstatic, I'm delighted, I'm overwhelmed, I'm emotional, I'm so happy for them, I got everything I could have wanted. I won. We won.

(I HAVE TOO MANY PICS. I'LL RB WITH PART 2)

First of all this scene is so special to me, you have no idea.

It isn't inherently romantic but it's still so sweet and shows how much these two care for each other. Here's Willow, who's spent the last special Atlasing and repressing and refusing to rely on anyone else. But then she had her breakdown in front of Hunter and he realized just how stressed and scared she's been this whole time. She's visibly anxious and upset here, likely worrying up a storm because she hasn't found her Dads yet. And Hunter is right here beside her. He's seen her meltdown, he's felt her pain, he's heard her cry. He knows that Willow is in a fragile state at the moment. He knows she's been holding in a lot. He knows she's scared. I love that he's not only standing by her side and helping her search, but holding her too. It could be that she vocally expressed how worried she was to him, or maybe he just saw it on her face, but he probably placed that hand on her back to comfort her, let her knows he's right here, grounding her. And Willow, who's still learning how to depend on others, is letting him.

The way Hunter lights up when he sees Harvey and Gilbert, thrilled by how happy he knows she's going to be and his soft smile when he points them out to her. And then THIS!

Like Hunter is devastated. He feels alone and out of place here. He really thinks he has nobody. But Willow being happy can still bring a smile to his face. He just loves her so much!!!

And I know I already talked about the grom photo but UGHH!!!

I got a pic in better definition. I'm pretty sure this is Hunter's first grom. So likely a few months after the events of WAD. And it's so cute to think about Hunter and Willow very awkwardly but eagerly navigating a romantic relationship. I love how grabby and flirty Willow looks here, messing with his bowtie. She clearly LOVES the floral suit, thinking he's like the hottest man alive. She needs to smooch him and NOW. Or she's just like "Oh my, what a nice collarbone you have!!" Idk the ambiguity of what exactly Willow is doing here but the vibe and general intentions being very obvious is my favourite part of this pic. You can speculate for years on this. Oh and Hunter's face, I love it so much. His dumb little blush is like an old friend. He's fucking THRILLED that he's getting so much attention from her. He's very excited about where this is going. But he's also like. So nervous he's gonna pass out. But overall he's having the time of his life. Bi rights!

Also epilogue Huntlow....guys....guys epilogue Huntlow....are you guys still listening to me at this point?

God I love this scene. Its so natural and smooth, giving the characters a chance to breathe and exist and providing a glimpse of how they go about their daily lives. It's soft and lighthearted but it establishes so much about where Willow and Hunter are currently at in their relationship. They've been dating for like....3 years at the very least. And they're clearly very happy together!!

The way Willow casually slides on to the scene, giving the impression that she's often dropped in on him while he's working. And why wouldn't she? That's her sweetheart. What if she requires emergency smooches? What then? And of course, there's Hunter beaming at the sight of her. Seems he never gets tired of his girlfriend stopping by to visit. Or maybe he's sick to death of Willow the menace showing up to distract him while he's trying to work and he's just excited about the prospect of Luz's party. Either way, it's an adorable expression.

Something else I love about epilogue Huntlow is how equally distributed the affection is between both of them. Back when FTF dropped I gushed about how sweet it was to see Hunter taking initiative with Willow and the significance of something as simple pressing his backhand against hers during the pinky hold. And God, this sequence here says it all. From what I can tell, as Hunter runs towards her, they both reached out at the same time and linked hands immediately, implying that holding hands has become the automatic gesture for them whenever they meet up. They're in love, you're honor.

I love the huge carefree grins as they skate down the hill (still holding hands). They might have grown a lot since we last saw them but they're still young adults, they still love to have fun doing dumb reckless stuff. And even better, they love to have fun doing dumb reckless stuff together. All the handholding and fluffy cuteness is wonderful but I also love knowing that they seem to genuinely enjoy just hanging out and spending their youth with each other. Zeno was right, they ARE besties. Who knows how much shit Hunter and Willow get up to together? Being a pair of thrill seeking athletes, it's probably a lot.

This part is just so silly and ridiculous. After they go stumbling, Willow's first instinct is to grab Hunter and hold on for dear life. Her intense scrunched up expression is just so funny. "I will protect you, my love. No big dumb hill is going to harm a hair on your pretty head. Your girl is here." And Hunter barely acknowledging it (it probably happens a lot) because his life is currently flashing before his eyes. GOD they're just such nerds.

Oh and this frame is just SO adorable. The way Willow's hold on him lingers for a moment before he walks towards the grave, Hunter's heart eyes. They're clearly still so soft and touchy with each other. And this is after three years. I know they were insufferable when they started dating as teens.

[copperbadge]

RE watching thoughts: I’m not 100% sure, but it might be that the whole “I am not my thoughts” is about engaging and identifying with your metacognition MORE than your initial thoughts. Because I get where you’re coming from - what is a consciousness but a collection of thoughts and feelings? But you can also have thoughts about your own thoughts that are more useful for dealing with whatever situation you’re in, I guess. (Random aside - every time I start thinking about thinking about thinking my brain inevitably starts thinking about Tiffany Aching and The Wee Free Men.)

I really should have replied to this ask sooner because it's going to seem like a non-sequitur now (this was sent much earlier in March) but I'm kind of glad I didn't, because I've been chatting with people about this and I think I understand more why there's an emphasis in some therapies on the idea that we are not our thoughts.

(I uh, haven't read the Tiffany books so I'm not much help there.)

I am coming to understand that many, perhaps most, people judge themselves, comprehensively and harshly, based on their thoughts. Perhaps it's just a lot of people who struggle with mental health, but given the commonality of the sentiment I don't know if I'd confine it that tightly; generally it appears that people cannot conceive of themselves as anything other than a binary of good or bad. So many people I've talked to about this portion of DBT, the watching-questioning-identifying thoughts portion, say that it helps to snap them out of a spiral of "I'm a horrible person, I deserve to suffer/die, I can never be redeemed" after they've failed at something, or had a negative thought, or reacted poorly to an unexpected event.

That is not something I've ever experienced. I mean, jokingly maybe, but not in a real, internal sense.

And that's not to brag -- I'm not saying I think I'm a good person, either, because I don't think I'm a good person. I don't conceive of myself in terms of good or bad. I never cuddle my cats and think "I'm such a good cat dad" or forget to feed them and think "I should die now." I have a perpetual morally neutral attitude towards my own existence; my thoughts and actions might trend me one direction or another but I'm aware of the temporary nature of that. If I fuck up I'll worry about who I might have hurt or whether I'll be fired or what's going to happen as a consequence, if I am polite to someone who didn't deserve it I know I was acting kindly in the moment, but I don't make an inherent moral judgement of myself based on that. And it seems like the vast majority of people do. Which you would think would make me feel pretty good about myself, but honestly...I don't know.

A lot of people I know who have ADHD or are Autistic have talked about seeing themselves as other, as alien -- like that one webcomic artist who draws themself with little antennae to indicate they're strange and different. I've always understood why one might do that, but I never felt that way myself, before or after the diagnosis. After all, let's remember, I was The Normal* Child of my siblings, and if I was The Normal One before the diagnosis, why wouldn't I remain Mostly Normal after?

* As ever, I'm using "normal" as a cultural term, to indicate what we think of as mainstream, not because normal is a thing that really exists.

My life has been relatively solitary -- I have friends and family and I love them but I'm rarely part of a large group, I don't spend a lot of time out in public interacting with people, I'm not a big socializer. Before the Adderall, I really couldn't be, I took too much psychic damage from interpersonal interaction, so I chose those very carefully. And now my DBT class has been a rare moment when I'm encountering contradictions to a lot of my assumptions about the way human beings in our society interact, react, and behave. I just...don't fit that mold very well. I think of it as having crossed wiring, not in the sense that I'm faulty but just in the sense that I'm very, very different. Not Normal. It's not exactly a bad feeling but it's certainly not a great one, internalizing the sensation of alienness.

DBT is proving to be a mixed bag but not in the way I or my therapist intended -- it seems to be either things I was already instinctively doing or things that simply do not apply to me. In one way it's disappointing because it means there isn't much help to be had (we're a little over halfway through the course and I keep thinking "Maybe next class will be useful") but on the other hand it's validating that so much of what I came up with myself as unconscious coping mechanisms is literally what I would have been told to do anyway.

Sometimes it's a combination of both, though, which really blows. I guess most people, if they reframe another person's actions, actually find emotional relief in that, and I don't. An example from the class is that if someone is rude to you, you can consider how they might be having a hard day, and be polite in return; that's great, in terms of defusing a situation, and it's something I do a fair amount of. But apparently it's also something that for most people results in feeling less awful about the interaction, and that's not the case for me. Which is why so much of DBT feels to me like lying to oneself. It's not lying for most people.

So, yeah. I'm going to finish out the course and keep trying things with the therapist but I suspect given everything, I might already be at "as good as it gets" in terms of emotional work. Which isn't the worst thing in the world, and there is still the option to try medication that could help, but I think there will come a point where I'm going to have to deal with the fallout of just how different I am, and how that has impacted my life. Might end up a good thing; something I've really been trying to resolve is unhappiness over being unpartnered and highly likely to remain that way, and at least if this provides a better understanding of why, then perhaps I can process that and put it to rest in a way I've been trying to do but not succeeding well at.

So, we'll see. But I find it both fascinating and kind of horrifying how many people can believe they are irredeemably bad, even if the belief is only temporary, simply because they had an uncharitable thought or impulse. It makes me somewhat grateful for the crossed wires, at least.

[lionheartedmusings]

i will never not be endlessly fascinated with pomme and q!bad's dynamic, especially now after the egg disappearance, purgatory, and returning to the island.

because pomme's adoption wasn't this huge emotional moment or him stepping in for someone who wasn't there, their bond was built out of time and care and love, to the point that it was just the next natural step in their relationship. even after that, it took a while for pomme to call q!bad dad because she was nervous and wanted it to be at the right time -- q!bad was aware of it too, because when she did call him dad for the first time he melted, took a photo of the sign, and made it not a big deal per se but acknowledged that it was a meaningful moment between them. then they moved on and kept going as usual.

their time together is cherished and not an afterthought -- yes, when her french parents are on pomme will always do the rounds with them! of course, she wants to spend time with them! q!bad's time with her is after, and they both know that in an inherently healthy and comforting way. it's their schedule, and even if she's with q!bad and one of her other parents log on off stream she'll go to hang out and q!bad only *once* interrupted that time, and it was to ask for her opinion on footage when he thought someone was in his house.

pomme is also both a mini-bad in a lot of ways inherently, and his absolute antithesis. they both share vicious anger when those they love are endangered, are fiercely protective and paranoid, are planners and worries to a fault... i don't think pomme would be surprised to hear what her dad did in purgatory at all, even if it would make her sad. that's where they're not similar at all: pomme is vengeful too, don't get me wrong, she's an eye for an eye girlie *but* she has a level of restraint that q!bad doesn't, and a moral compass that actually sees right and wrong vs. something i care about and something i don't. q!bad has been anchored by pomme before, brought to heel so to speak, in a way that needed no convincing because there's a level of trust there that's inherent.

and yet pomme knows and q!bad has acknowledged that dapper is his priority -- not in terms of love, never that, but still a priority. and that's just okay. pomme knows she's loved, she knows her dad adores her and she also knows that she has other parents that love her whereas ultimately dapper doesn't. she knows her mom q!baghera would prioritise her, and so would q!antoine, and q!aypierre, and q!etoiles -- it's okay that q!bad doesn't because he's looking out for her brother and she loves her brother more than anything.

the one thing that's interesting to me about their dynamic is the fact that pomme is loud and proud about being q!bad's daughter and has expressed frustration that people don't know / acknowledge her as his kid, but q!bad is almost reluctant to say she's his more often than not.

i can count on one hand the times he's corrected someone when they mention only dapper, or added that pomme is his too... and yet in private to him it's always dapper and pomme. he grieved them both in their time away, left pomme a message, checked her room too. he sang her happy birthday and got her the flowers she likes. he lost it when the eggs went missing not at seeing dapper's empty bed, but pomme's. he, in the throes of his memory loss and confusion, proudly said "this has got to be pomme's, this is exactly how my daughter would organise things" about the egg rooms.

there's a duality there that is fascinating and confusing and seems... purposeful on q!bad's behalf in a way i truly can't figure out entirely.

maybe he's trying to protect her, to distance himself from her in the rest of the island's minds so if something goes wrong she can be safe in a way he knows dapper could never be -- after all, elquackity didn't take pomme, he had no idea she was his.

i guess it's all about love, anyway.

[moodymisty]

Something i find very interesting about the Horus Heresy is the general absence of female influences. The core characters are all male, and conduct themselves in typically masculine ways. Excepting the general absence of libido, (most of) the Primarchs are pure manliness.

I find this dynamic very interesting. Men behave differently towards each other when women aren't around to observe them. Sometimes this is positive (e.g. brotherly affection), but sometimes it's negative (e.g. resorting to violence as a means of conflict resolution). The same is roughly true of women when men aren't around, except that women exhibit different behaviours (e.g. cattiness rather than violence).

If you have mixed group of men and women, the two sides tend to temper each other. Men break up female conflicts, and women break up male conflicts. Likewise, the presence of men motivates women in unique ways, and the presence of women motivates men in equally unique ways. This motivation isn't always positive (e.g. a woman could spread malicious gossip about her romantic rival), but it can certainly be positive in many cases.

This isn't a hard rule, as everyone is different, but it's a tendency i've witnessed. Men and women affect each other just by being around each other. It's just human nature.

On this basis, then, the Horus Heresy is interesting because it essentially represents how men react when there aren't women around to temper them. Lots of ego clashes, lots of petty one-upmanship, lots of violence, and very little consideration given for anything other than dominance. Even though there are certainly respectable female characters present in 30k, many of whom influence the Astartes and Primarchs around them, they don't play any tangible role within the politics of the Legions, and there is no female equal to the Primarchs whom they would have reason to listen to. They are all "mortals", and therefore not of any great concern to most of them, even in the best of cases.

(For the record, i'm not arguing that masculinity is inherently barbaric and ego-driven. I'm just saying that such is the "dark side" of manliness. An example of the "light side" of manliness is chivalry, which - you've guessed it - is partly motivated by the presence of women.)

In essence, the Horus Heresy is - to me - a story about what happens when masculinity is left to run rampant without a female voice present to call out all the shitty behaviour, and make the men feel bad about their childishness. It's basically like Lord of the Flies, but the fate of humanity is at stake. That's what makes 30k so tragic and engaging; it's all so avoidable.

The closest thing the Primarchs have to such an influence is The Emperor, who fulfils the role of a father figure. Although patriarchal (fatherly) figures are necessarily judgemental and punitive when necessary, it's not the same as being scolded by a mother figure or a spousal figure. Being scolded by Dad feels different to being scolded by Mum, or by your wife. With the exception of Guilliman, mother figures are not present in the lives of the Primarchs, and it reeeaaally shows. Also, the Emperor is a very absent parental figure to the Primarchs, meaning that they're mostly left to their own devices despite behaving like teenagers. This is another reason why 30k feels like Lord of the Flies.

Now this is purely speculation on my part, but if the Primarchs started getting married off to stable and well-adjusted women close to an equal footing with themselves (say, powerful perpetuals), the women would be a positive influence on them, and the Horus Heresy would be much more mild, if it happened at all. Sure, you might get different stories (such as Horus being deceived by a daemon disguised as his late wife), but that's not what Warhammer is about. Warhammer is about big men/robots/aliens hitting each other for assorted reasons, and the tempering influence of women would detract from this, in some areas. So... No wish fulfilment dreams for us :'(

I love the idea that the HH never happens because a few of the primarchs actually got pussy.

[dairy-farmer]

I call this the Highlander Au! >:Dc There can Be Only One! (Unless he REALLY enjoys the process and the world stops going to shit for like... FIVE god damned minutes!) (The second is sadly unlikely)

Tim? Fully Cis gendered male. Not terribly ATTACHED to this, physically, but certainly identifies as Male and has a male body.

Maybe it's been all the near misses. The "all my friends fuckin DIED on my and I mentally spiraled like you wouldn't believe". Could be him finally reclaiming his life. Or yet another horrible mental spiral. Who knows!

But he's decided.

He wants to be a Dad. *sound of various Bats choking and/or dropping things*

Is even seeing anybody? Nope. How the FUCK is he gonna get a baby?! Oh, normal, Bat Paranoid fashion. Cloning tube. Same way Damian happened. He just needs to figure out the maternal DNA and he's golden. Figure out where to hide his tech to stop Villainous Baby Snatching Plots.

Because that's a very real concern.

No you can't talk him out of this. Timmy want himself a baby. Is already designing a nursery and studying child development books. Parenting manuals, getting those little animal onsies, lazer death grids to ward of Ra's ninjas. The works.

Bruce is off to the side, quietly having an aneurysm and choking to death on his own spit. Baby boy? Fatherhood? OFFSPRING!? Alone and not going to LET HIM HELP!? But why would he help!? Bad idea! But. But he needs to BE THERE to TAKE CARE of TIM and the future BABY! Aaaaaaaaa-!!!!!

It's a... "Fun" time. Dick is nearing a nervous breakdown. Bruce not far behind. Damians having Feelings(tm).

Then! At a Wayne Charity Event(tm)? Small glowing child. Looks alien. Is getting upset. People backing away IN A HURRY because they just watched this child WARP REALITY to turn the nearest table into candy.

Tim is there as the face of the family. A hero. Already feeling generally Paternal. Upset baby is Bad. So he goes in, dispite clear protests. Gets low and talks soothing.

But the alien Wants Her MOMMY!

And? Oh. Well there goes the protective amulets JLA Dark made for him. Now he's in an alien dress and? Very much no longer Cis. Guess he would have and DID inherent from his dad's side of the family, no boobs. Tiny. At least he got his mom's killer legs.

And the kiddo isn't scared any more. Since he "looks like mommy".

Except not even remotely, because she warps into being an HOUR later, looking for her daughter and is made of pure light. Thanks him. Doesn't FIX anything. And just leaves. Gee, thanks lady.

There were REPORTERS there. Tim Drake has tits now. Front page news. Great. Ra's is GOING to know and get WEIRD about it.

Tim shrugs. Off to Leslie we go, though. Check up time!

Yep. Full lady bits action. And, hey! Shiny new spleen! So that's nice.

It DOES change his plan though. He didn't, you know, collect any "samples" yet. But? Does... does he NEED too? He COULD concoct a story of "rich person hires mystic to get penis back" after going and getting magiced back.... OR?

He could have someone put a baby in him! *simultaneous Bat Choking Noises*

MUCH easier to defend. THEN he could be changed back, after the baby is weaned. The problem is who to trust? Ra's is ABSOLUTELY going to do everything in his power to get his seed inside Tim new puss. So a seed bank is out. And-

*hands slam on the table*

Obviously! We can't trust anyone outside this house! Villian plots and Ra's specifically! Bat paranoia! W-we will just have to make this sacrifice for you!

.....Weirdly intense, but okay.

Objection! Says Tim's newly no longer Dead team mates. Tim tried to CLONE Kon! OBVIOUSLY it should be Kon! And Bart! Bro Threesome! Let nature decide! (Then kid number 2 is the other Bro, is only FAIR)

ALSO a good point. He did have that promise, if one of them ever got turned into a girl. And a Kon baby WOULD be nice...

Shit! Grayson pulls "last of my legacy and I have so much to make up for" cards!

Is betrayed by his OWN FATHER (Bruce! How COULD YOU!?) Who plays "you saved me from the time steam and nearly died for me, let me help(emotional)" to devastating effect!

Cheating! Howls the Speedster! You're CHEATING!!!

And Tim stands there... kinda confused but finding he's actually Really In To This as people argue over how much THEY want to be the one to put a baby in him? He's never felt this badly WANTED. Desired.

He may not want to go through the whole "actually carrying a baby for 9 months then pushing one out" thing more then once.... but the fighting over him thing? This might be awaking something.

And, well, Kon already made a good point. Why try to control it? Let nature decide~

Everyone can help.

The argument stops dead. For all of the seconds before "who goes first?" Occurs to everyone.

Sadly for THEM, Bruce is a bastard willing to play dirty to get what he wants. And his house his rules. He goes first. After all, he no doubt smirks, none of THEM have the... experience, to handle a virgin properly.

He refuses to allow Tim hurt on his watch.

Got it? Good talk. Tim, with him.

Which is what leads to Tim clawing at the bed and begging like his life depends on it, soaked in sweat, hours later. As Bruce STILL gently, teasingly, RUTHLESSLY eats him out. Puddles worth of lube ruining the sheets and easing his way, as he works calloused fingers DEEP to find spots Tim didn't know he had yet. As they rub and tease and fuck against those spots so relentlessly it feels like Tim's coming apart.

He didn't even know he could MAKE half these noises.

His hole is so wet and sloppy, it's like it's given up. Like his body can do nothing but quiver and twitch under Bruce's hands. Given how big he is? Probably the point. Because he crawls up to loom over Tim like a giant. Presses kisses to his whimpering, sweaty face. And rocks into his exhausted body, filling every inch of him.

It doesn't even hurt. Something that big probably SHOULD for his first time, but Bruce isn't a legendary playboy for nothing. And it just fills and Fills and FILLS. Rubs against everything in a way that makes his toes curl. Makes him want to gasp and cling, even though he's so exhausted.

Bruce just shooshes him. Pulls him close. He won't have to do a thing. He can just cling to Bruce and feel good. Bruce is here. He's got you.

And it's the best thing Tim's ever felt. Forget masturbation, sex is AMAZING. Bruce rocking then thrusting then pounding into his body. Holding tight like something precious. Hammering his good spots still he sees stars. Til he's nearly sobbing, hiccuping, from how good it feels to have his insides all messed up.

Bruce fills him up. All gooey and warm. Picks him up and carries him to a clean bed to get wiped down and tucked in. Cleans up then joins him. Fills him back up and tucks him close. He feels boneless and precious. Sleeps like the dead.

Discovers sex with a puss is AWESOME.

Next morning, he's barely out of Bruce's room before Dick is scooping him up and dragging him into his room. Almost franticly bending him in half as he presses him to the bed, kissing the air out of him. Holding his face as he whispers filthy praise into his lips. Hips relentless as they slam home, pounding at just the right angle.

Like he's trying to make for YEARS of mistakes by pouring it all into pleasure NOW. Clinging tight and trying to fry Tim's brain with how good he can make him feel. Dick buries his faces against Tim's neck and rutts like he's making up for lost time. Fucking Tim through orgasms, spilling again and again, like he's determined to drain his balls dry and wring every last bit of pleasure he CAN out of Tim's exhausted body.

Tim has to threaten to hit him with an alarm clock to let him up. Tim wants LUNCH damn it. They missed breakfast. By a LOT.

But then work calls. Damn it. So he has to get dressed. Double damn it. And he does it, but refuses to be pleased about it. Resolves things. Even gets ahead on work. Only for DAMIAN to walk stiffly into his office. Sus.

The gremlin hands him a frankly VERY well put together report on why he, Damian AL Ghul... should be allowed to fuck a baby into Tim. He has brought along a slide show and genealogical report.

.......Explain.

Damian does. He REALIZED some things about himself. When Tim was discussing becoming a Father. Using the same method as he, himself, was created. Went through a whole "go to the Kent farm and have a life change adventure" character growth arc, as you do. And? Now realizing that he potentially COULD be DIRECTLY involved in the Hypothetical Child's life instead of as an uncle?

He wants in. They could be glorious, combined. AND he firmly believes Tim will be a magnificent Mother. Let him Father your child.

It's a bad idea. Tim knows this. He literally JUST slept with Bruce yesterday and nothing good comes from sleeping with AL Ghul's. They Obsess. But? Fuck it. Maybe THIS is the thing that finally stops the Tim-Gremlin cold war and bring peace to house Wayne once and for all. He unbuckles his belt. Walks over to his resting room.

And Tim KNOWS, even as he's being urgently fucked into the fold out bed, that this is an AWFUL idea. No way in HELL, from the desperate and sloppy thrusts, clinging, panting and whines, is this NOT Damian's first time. He's utterly undone.

Pounding load after load into Tim because it feels too good to stop. All enthusiasm and no skill. Half the pleasure Tim's even GETTING is his own hand, relentlessly teasing his own clit. But? Oh. The feeling of being wanted so BADLY. Of cum, gushing and gushing into him. Knowing it's HIS hole that's so good, it's driving Damian incoherent.

He feels... sexy. It DEFINITELY does something for him. He may not be able to go back. Could see himself enjoying being a milf.

But of course. Business hours end. And he PROMISED! Is swept up by Bart for their threesome. Which, after several rounds and untold loads of near-no-refractary-period speedster cum dumped inside him? Is kinda spotty, in his memory.

All he knows for certain is he wakes up to his sheepish best friends, "Sorry we fucked you unconscious repeatedly" bribes, no voice, and a warm bath. He's also plugged up and FULL full of that premium speedster/half-kryptonian blend cum, because apparently his friend intend to WIN and nothing says victory like overwhelming odds. He'd call them fuckers, but they ARE and hold no remorse. He can't move.

Carry him you bastards.

When he asks where Cassie is, he learns she's apparently trying to harrass the magic users into a making her a temporary "turn me into a dude" amulet. Both as a gift AND so she can join the race for Father Of Tim's Baby. Huh. Interesting new options.

Obviously, throughout ALL of this, ninjas. Because Ra's has never wanted to smash so hard in his LIFE.

Instead, Tim is out here, on Jason's shitty couch. Getting lifted up and slammed down onto his cock. Called baby girl. Princess. Jason's never been harder. Already planning their kids graduation dinner and baby number three.

Tim feeling precious and taken care of and DESIRED. Like the young adult with a first shitty apartment he never got to be. Something so close to normal. Put a baby in him. Fuck him like you love him, like they do this every Saturday night, then eat pizza and watch trash TV. Fill him up.

And if course~ it's a VICIOUS game of Fuck The Tim keep away, up until one day he starts to show. Then Everyone is loving and coddling and in a "No I Am The Father" cold war. The birth is a nightmare, because Tim is slender and more scar tissue then not. But?

Adorable quarter-Kryptonian! With the biggest blue eyes and Tim's porcelain doll face.

Tim is NOT doing that again. Ffffffuck giving birth. And being pregnant! Granted, the EARLY part? He loved. He glowed. Getting pregnant was AWESOME. But later stages? God awful. Clone tube babies from here on out.

Absolute Devastation in the Tom Fucking Community. Babe no! You can't MEAN IT!

Woah, hey! He never said he'd STOP. "Getting Pregnant" is very, VERY enjoyable. He's just refusing to carry SHIT. Birth control for HIM. Scooping that slurry of "leave it up to Nature" out and storing it. Now... Kon stop being smug and hold your son.

-🐼🐼🐼

😭😭😭 tim getting everyone to come to dinner and they all think it was alfred and are like 'this was a great idea alfred! we should all get together like this more often' only for tim to cough and say well actually i called you all here, i figured you all deserved a heads up since i'm going to be undergoing some serious life changes. everyone's confused and then tim says he's going to have a baby.

immediate panic and some disappointment from bruce because he thinks this is a teen pregnancy and he expected better from tim only for tim to have to yell to interrupt everyone and say there is no 'girl', not yet anyway. he's just announcing that he's GOING to have a baby. they're not yet conceived and now the family is dealing with whiplash of how of course TIM would do something like this now they're sitting their listening to him talk about the ideal gene pool given tim's family has a history of mental issues and he's going into some very detailed things like nurseries and everyone just wants him to slow down because tim is still a kid!!! dick is older than him and even HE doesn't feel ready. so everyone is trying to talk tim out of it while tim insists he's ready, he's been going to a therapist for 11 months trying to deal with his issues so he COULD be ready to be a parent.

which of course baffles them even more because???? dick has been trying to get them all into therapist for years and tim just???? went??? on his own????

bruce is of course the least welcoming of tim's ideas of teen parenthood. because what about highschool, college? at least ONE of his kids has to go to college!

tim however says no, says his GED is more than enough.

bruce tries finding other angles, asking what if he just sets tim up with babysitting gigs? make him see kids aren't that great and tim just huffs and said he already did a bunch of babysitting and volunteering at the children's centers in gotham as part of his adoption application!

which ???? just stressed bruce out even more?! because tim had tried to adopt a baby first? but apparently got rejected because of his age, lack of partner, and lack of job which tim loudly says is unfair because bruce was in his 20s when he took in dick and HE hadn't had a partner or a job!

so the family is protesting, despertly trying to get tim to change his mind,,, then tim gets a womb and suddenly the protests die down VERY quick.

[jorisjurgen]

I'M CRAZY. I'M CRAZY. I'M INSANE.

Ok so firstly, we all know that Kerubim and Atcham and Ush keep their memories of past lives. It's kind of silly to assume otherwise considering it's canon, and has been canon for years. (I say in the voice that implies i've been in 5 twitter fights about this with people who don't know about dofus MMO ecaflip lore.)

But i WAS afraid they'd keep it ambiguous for casual fans, by having Atch and Keke call Joris "dad" all the time again. I'm glad they're utilizing more of Joris's petnames besides "dad" this time around.

BUT I DID NOT EXPECT THEM TO CALL JORIS "JOJO", LIKE IN THE PAST? Especially when he expressed that he's too "grown up" for it in the movie. I guess Joris came around to it eventually?

Kerubim says it so protectively. He loves his son so much. I can't do this anymore.,..

Just... somethingsomething... the inherent tragedy of living with your parents for 600 years of codependency, them using all the same childish petnames they've always used for you, and living in the same exact childhood room. While being an adult man.

He can't leave the nest. He's grown into the nest, and now it's a part of him and his innards. He'll never be free.

On a less serious note JORIS PLUSHIE ENJOYER AGENDA IS REAL?!??!? HE DOES LOVE PLUSHES?!?!? HE HAS MULTIPLE OF THEM IN HIS SHITTY MESSY ADHD-NEST OF A BEDROOM. LMAO. ALSO THE MULTIPLE PILLOWS. I CAN'T.

idk how fandom still takes his "ough im so uptight, im so Cool and serious" façade so seriously still. He's worn a cute apron in the manga. He said "yugo me and my family can't stop losing dofus. you HAVE to take it from me." in the ova. he broke into ush's home to free his torture victims in the remington comic and said "Okie dokie" to them as he was freeing them. He was late to the battle with Nox. He is NOT a cool or serious guy. He's a messy dumb bitch with a very well-maintained façade of coolness at best.

..This is so unserious, i can't.

[louisthiccsexyglitteryass]

OKAY HI! This post will either be long as fuck or irritatingly short for how much I want to say.

Gonna do it under the cut so you can opt out of reading this...

As you can probably guess, my favourite character in Hazbin Hotel is Lucifer. He's so pookie.

But I also like to think about my own headcanoned lore. Because that's fun and silly. So. Here goes...

(yes, this has probably been touched on before, but let me yap okay...)

Why I think that Lucifer didn't intervene with the battle with Heaven immediately.

As we learn from the get-go, Heaven are pretty stuck in their ways. Adam is very much firm in his belief that sinners = inherently bad, despite the fact that he, as a human, should understand the intricacies of humanity. Immorality isn't black and white, it's a spectrum. And Adam should understand that.

Yet, he doesn't really. In fact, he quite literally says:

"'Cause Hell is forever / Whether you like it or not / Had their chance to behave better / Now they boil in the pot / 'Cause the rules are black and white / There's no use in tryin' to fight it / They're burnin' for their lives / Until we kill 'em again!"

The key words here are "forever" and "black and white."

Adam is very clear in the way he addresses Charlie. Heaven believes that Sin is irredeemable, so to speak. They don't want Charlie to pursue her idea of the Hazbin Hotel, because they don't think it's even plausible.

But how does this relate to Lucifer?

Now, pay attention to Lucifer's words at the beginning of More Than Anything. "Charlie! You don't understand, Heaven never listens! They didn't listen to me, they won't listen to you."

Heaven Never Listens.

When Charlie presses him, he tells her that he does know. That Heaven never listens. Because, as we know, he wanted humans to have free will. We also know that Lucifer hates that he gave them free will, because of the sin they showed.

But what if Lucifer actually wanted to try redeem them? We know that his dreams were crushed by Heaven (see: More Than Anything lyrics), and that he doesn't want the same for Charlie. What if this was to do with the fact that he also believed in redemption, once upon a time?

Hear me out.

So, Lucifer knows that sinners come to Hell for being "bad." We all do. He also knows that Winners go to Heaven for being "good."

I'm sure he also knows that the two standards are very subjective. One interaction with the OG misogynistic asshole himself (Adam) would tell him this. And Lucifer's had plenty, if we assume that they have regular meetings after Exterminations. (how else would Charlie be able to meet with Adam like that?)

So, with all of this in mind, we can conclude three things:

Lucifer is very disheartened by Heaven and the causes he used to believe in.

Lucifer would be aware of the way Heaven operates and how it isn't as perfect as it seems.

Lucifer knows how subjective the meanings of right and wrong are.

But what does this have to do with anything?

Let's consider that Lucifer did, in fact, have a dream of redemption. He knew that "wrong" wasn't necessarily an easy to pinpoint thing - especially because he used to be an angel and now is associated with sin, and that he was the first to experience firsthand just how cruel Heaven could be.

He believed in redemption because he didn't want anyone, especially sinners, to experience anything negative in the afterlife. He felt responsible - they couldn't be sinners if he hadn't interfered.

All this considered, wouldn't it be natural for Lucifer to want to find a way to help humanity? I believe so.

Let's relate this back to his relationship with Heaven. Lucifer obviously has a negative relationship with them - he is a fallen angel that condemned the world to sin. Lucifer still has angelic power, just look at his words in Hell's Greatest Dad. "Pure Angelic Power." Additionally, we know from the Hell's Hierarchy that Lucifer is the most powerful being in Hell. So why couldn't he stop the extermination in the first place?

Well, what if he had an obligation not to. We know, from soul deals (e.g. Husk's soul is owned by Alastor, Angel's soul is owned by Valentino, etc, etc), that contracts are very easy to make in the Hellaverse. They can be binding - such as the way all VokTek employees are bound to Vox - and enforced very easily, like when Husk was intimidated by Alastor or when he infers that he physically didn't have a choice in working at the Hotel.

If you apply this logic to Lucifer, you can reason that maybe he isn't as free as we think. Heaven probably want to control him, to make sure that he doesn't start a revolution or overthrow them, or something. He would be well in the physical capability to do so, his power appears to be almost limitless.

What if Heaven had a contract with Lucifer? Prohibiting him from doing certain things?

In a slight detour from what I'm getting at - let's look at Adam's rules for getting into Heaven.

Specifically the rule that says "stick it to the man."

Now, from the show, we learn that Heaven don't actually know what gets you into Heaven. What we also know is that Adam was actually right, and Sir Pentious did all of the things on this list.

Think of it this way - if Heaven didn't want Lucifer to revolt, they'd avoid giving him opportunity to. Perhaps by literally banning him from it. In Lucifer's story, the man is Heaven.

To summarise, Heaven could have a contract with Lucifer that explicitly states that he cannot interfere with Heaven, and their actions, until they breach the contract.

So, how does this relate to my original point?

Well, if Lucifer cannot interfere with Heaven. Whatsoever. Then he cannot interfere during Exterminations. Or during battles against Heaven.

Now, if we consider that Lucifer probably negotiated with a clause, saying that Heaven couldn't fuck with Charlie and/or Lilith. Linking this to More Than Anything, Lucifer claims that Charlie is the only thing he cares about now.

So, let's think about the battle with Charlie and Adam:

Immediately after this, Lucifer appears.

Coincidence? I think not.

Adam hurts Charlie -> Lucifer appears.

So, how does this breach the contract?

If Charlie is protected by it like we're assuming, then Adam hurting her is breaching the contract, because she's been hurt.

Meaning that Lucifer can finally intervene. Think about what he says: "I'm sorry I couldn't be here sooner."

He couldn't physically be there - due to his contract.

To conclude, Lucifer couldn't be there until an Angel broke the contract that Heaven held over his head, at the risk of hurting the cause of the Hazbin Hotel. Because if he did, Heaven could have cracked down on them and shut down the hotel - or worse, especially because he would be unable to do anything because he had broke the contract first.

Thanks for reading! I'd love to hear your take on this!

TLDR: Lucifer couldn't do anything, because of a contract, until Adam hurt Charlie.

[carouselunique]

Is it true that there's no animosity between you and... you know, you know who. You never talk about her in any way. I guess I'm curious. You guys seemed like really close friends and then just weren't friends at all. And there was some stuff she said that seemed very targeted at you...

I don't know if she feels any animosity toward me or not any more. Our mutual friends have said she doesn't and I take them on their word in that regard, assuming that if they have an answer for me it's because they're aware how she feels. I wouldn't know and it's not my place to put words in her mouth.

I haven't spoken to her/about her in a long time and the only time she even crosses my mind is when people bring her up to me. As for me feeling any animosity? I'll admit my feelings on her these days are complicated and way too nuance-core for people who aren't my friends to hear about but I wouldn't call them animosity in any way. I inherently want people my friends care about to live well because I care about my friends, and anyone my friends care about by proxy and I still share friends with her. I would never wish ill on people my friends care about so animosity doesn't fit into that by definition. I'd say I'm hurt more than anything and even then I've worked through a lot of it with trusted friends who have helped me deal with my emotions in a healthy way.

(Besides, my own life struggles keep me from even being able to invest time into animosity. I have to expend that energy loving my family, doing my best to support them during our struggles. And I've never been a hateful person it isn't in me. I would rather play 'Hot To Go' by Chappell Roan and teach my dad how to do the hand gestures to help him strengthen his muscles again than focus on hating anyone...)

I try not to think about her because it hurts. I often think that people forget that I'm a real person outside of her sphere, and that I wouldn't want to talk about what happened because I truly did consider her a friend for a long time. And when someone I consider a friend appears to not regard me with care any more suddenly and I don't even have closure on that... well... it hurts... A lot. Of course I never talk about it.

And I'm not stupid, I have seen some stuff she's said that I've gathered was about me. I remind myself that she has a right to vent in her own spaces and I truly mean that... it's just a shame that her own spaces have people who then have taken these things to me to show me (after all, I wouldn't have even seen these things myself if not for third-party anons going 'this u?') saying it is my own fault because I was a terribly cruel friend or my own fault for not listening to warnings about her when I had the chance and that makes me a stupid gullible bitch. You lot haven't seen some of the awful shit about me from some of her more ravenous fans and haters I've seen over the years that I've had to let roll off my back in the fear it would bring backlash - not even to me, to her. I don't want to be the cause of any hatred going to anyone.

Also I'm just not going to ever talk about the details of our fallen friendship or our fallen relationship. That's private. She might be a public person to some extent but I never was, even if I do gain some measure of small fandom for my work one day I'm just private about personal matters especially raw ones. I almost deleted this ask entirely but Idk I never stated that it bothers me when people talk to me about her from my own mouth, so I guess that's what this ramble is.

If you send me anything about Lily Orchard it will not be addressed. I am not a part of her life not even through our mutual friends. I do not know or care what's going on with her public/personal life. I haven't kept up. I will never keep up. Don't treat me as an extension of the situation because I am not in the situation. In the most plainly stated sense of the word: Leave me the Hell alone. (...pretty please.)

All I've wanted this entire time was to be left alone to process everything in a healthy, peaceful way. I'm workin' on it.

[transmutationisms]

do you have any insight on roman and incest? i know that in succession, business = fucking and at some points all of the sibs talk about fucking their dad as in one upping him business wise, but ceirtain comments roman makes are obviously different. i've been rewatching s3 and he joked about repetedly entering his mother's vagina at ken's birthday, in that same episode he tells shiv that she's mad logan doesn't want to fuck her anymore bc he's fucking roman now... also when he tells her she can be his sexy secretary when he takes over, and many more examples

and this last episode when he was listening to that edited video of logan over and over, i know i'm not the only one who thought he might start jacking off... i guess my question is do you think roman has any actual incestuous desires? and if not, why does he say these things? is it attention seeking? trying to make people uncomfortable?

first of all, the jacking off undertones of that deepfake scene were absolutely there on purpose. i mean, what logan is 'saying' in that clip echoes the sort of dirty talk gerri used to provide, and the reason for that is because the whole driving force of the roman-gerri affair was him getting her to say things that logan used to say about him. gerri was always a daddy proxy for him; it was always about him jacking off to the way his father verbally degraded him, but then combined with gerri's willingness to serve as an actual business mentor for him, something logan would never do because he was frankly just disgusted at roman as a general rule.

which is to say: yes, roman has some genuine incestuous desire for his father, to the same degree that anyone else with a negative oedipus complex does. and this is central, i think, to the critique of the nuclear family that runs through succession. these psychoanalytic complexes are products of that family structure, which is itself embedded within the capitalist mode of production. roman's subconscious desire to fuck/marry his father is, the show suggests, just a more overt manifestation of the standard dysfunction that inherently plagues the social form of the family. it's elevated because of the degree of control logan asserted over roman, even well into adulthood, and the way his wealth and corporate power created that dynamic. but the suggestion here is not that the roys are uniquely incestuous or that roman is intrinsically a pervert; it's that family structures, which are capitalist structures, create this type of psychosexual (under)development. it's freud if he slayed (was friends with wilhelm reich and gilles deleuze).

i don't think we have any textual reason to think roman has incestuous desire for his other family members. he talks like that for a handful of other reasons. with the caroline stuff, he's partly just responding to shiv and logan accusing him of wanting to fuck her (logan does this because he thinks roman is a pervert but can't consciously face the fact that he's, like, gay for real, so his catholic brain goes straight to He's A Boy Who Wants To Fuck His Mother; shiv makes these accusations partly for similar reasons of seeing roman as dirty / perverted / abnormal and having no other explanation, and partly because she's deflecting from her own glaring caroline issues).

with the shiv stuff, this is sort of central to their relationship—that they both make crude sexual comments to each other. it's part of how they negotiate that rivalry-camaraderie thing. it's almost cute. also, most of these comments are so off-base that they're not actually bothered by them; it's noticeable when one of them actually crosses a line (like shiv saying "some day you're actually going to have to fuck something").

overall roman's relationship to his own sexuality is fraught, partly because of logan's homophobia and resulting surveillance of roman's sexual expression, and partly because of roman's relationship with his body. also, like his siblings, roman grew up in the middle of the sexual violence corporation. he doesn't really know how to think about sex in any way besides as a violation, and this is reflected in how he talks about it. he uses incestuous or sexually crude jokes as a way to deflect from certain emotional intimacies, to present himself as disgusting so that he can pre-empt other people making him feel that way, and as a way of conveying his sense that he's at the bottom of the hierarchy and is emotionally, physically, and sexually vulnerable.

[1moreff-creator]

How the LGI MV proves MonoTVid is both canon and a doomed ship

In this totally serious analysis post, I will show you, with 100% irrefutable evidence, that MonoTVid (the common ship name for MonoTV x David) is destined to be both canon and a doomed ship. This is in honor of them recently winning that one poll in The Website Formerly Known As Twitter, a poll which I do not entirely understand but one which I will respect regardless.

I will not accept any criticism on this post. I am objectively correct. If you find mistakes in this post, then what you’ve found is a mistake in your brain.

Obviously a TV, Obviously a Ship

Observe.

Now, do you understand?

If you don’t, let me spell it out for you. We have what is “obviously a TV” with terrorist iconography, which obviously represents MonoTV, nearby several elements which clearly represent David. The hair clips, the megaphone, the dummy. You’ll see “dummies” is plural, because David is a dummy. This is the first clue to the tsundenderish nature of David, as he is literally calling himself a “baka”, perhaps even of the sussy variety. If he calls himself “baka”, could he use the same word to describe someone else?

But the true indication of this ship is the lemon on top of the TV. See, the lemon in the story “Lemon” by the man who wrote the story “Lemon”, whoever he was, is a lemon which represents, despite being a lemon, a person’s will to live. If you want further context on this lemon, read the background text near the lemon when the lyric “make a lemon bomb” shows up on screen, near the lemon. You think I’m gonna post an image of the lemon text near the lemon? No. You should know the lemon text near the lemon by heart.

Anyways, this lemon is obviously on top of the TV to represent that MonoTV is David’s reason to live. There are no other possible interpretations.

But you may also see those dandelions, labeled “weeds”. Weed is what I’m taking to make this post. Not cannabis, I am sniffing dandelions. This is besides the point.

Now, you’ll realize that since dandelions represent happiness, and even hope, the point the video tries to make with them is that David sees these things as annoying weeds. This shows MonoTV and David both hate hope. They are clearly lovers.

But what you didn’t notice, and I know you didn’t notice for I am in your walls, is footnote 18: “A/N: soz not very good at drawing flowers lol!!!”. See, David is the author of these notes, which is obvious from things like footnote 11, the “I am an only child” one. What this footnote means is that David gave these flowers to MonoTV, but he’s embarrassed about it, because he doesn’t think any gift can match the divine splendor of MonoTV. David is just that sweet. That much of a cinnamon roll who can do no wrong. A skrunkly. A blorbo. What other words can I use to brainwash Tumblr users.

Now, look at these.

Look at the balloon and the Monokuma plushie. Does my inconsistent coloring of “the” bother you? I am very evil. You’ll see the balloon is labeled “stupid kid’s toy”, while the plushie is “a popular toy”.

Now, you might think this is another indication that David sees anything related to hope, like balloons, as inherently childish and stupid. Meanwhile, he sees anything related to despair, like Monokuma, as more grounded.

You are wrong.

You seem, MonoTV has stated Monokuma is its dad. So this being in the video means that MonoTV is David’s daddy and his toy. I’ll explain when you’re older. Just kidding, I won’t. Fuck that.

Not convinced?

Why? I am always right, so you shouldn’t doubt me.

But okay, I guess:

I Will Bring Up Color Theory For The Thousandth Post In A Row

I am not linking the accirax post for the fiftieth time. Look it up yourself.

Look:

Yellow for David, cyan for MonoTV. Many have tried to come up with an answer for what “original” means, but it’s actually really simple.

See, David has an I. You wanna know who else has an I? Dark blue, which may be J. And J is the mastermind. Here’s the source for that, it’s somewhere in that video, you just have to find it.

So, J, who is the mastermind and thus essentially MonoTV, has the same letter as David. This clearly shows David and MonoTV are lovers.

Here’s another case of a cyan I.

Boom. Theorizing’s easy.

Then, look.

David has game in yellow, then MonoTV has game in cyan. They’re lovers. Do you find another explanation? No, no you don’t. You will not think critically about this post. You are not immune to MonoTVid propaganda.

But, alas, the ship is not to last.

David is a Cat

At the beginning of the video:

David calls himself a cat, then MonoTV shows up to remind us it’s a dog. You might think it doesn’t mean much, but there actually is meaning behind David being a cat. See, it’s related to the archaic Japanese pronoun “wagahai”, referenced-

Nah, you don’t care about that. David’s a cat, source just trust me bro.

That’s what the black and white cat sitting next to David actually represents: David, tied by color scheme to MonoTV. I’m writing this on my phone and don’t feel like waiting to get to a computer to get past the 10 image limit, so we’re out of visuals.

Why is this important? Well, if you take into account the Romeo and Juliet quote that footnote 8 is attached to (here’s a screenshot), it’s clear the MV is trying to convey a story of two people in love separated by fate. This is clearly about David and MonoTV, which is further represented by David being represented by a cat when MonoTV is obviously a dog. Truly sad. Can I get an amen?

Are you not convinced yet? Crazy. Well, one last thing then.

It’s All Democratic

“To be or not to be? Who knows? Let’s decide! Democratic-ly”

You see how the rules for class trials are on the same image as democratic-ly? Well, this is a clear reference to the poll on The Website Formerly Known As Twitter. Since MonoTVid was chosen as the winner of said poll, it was chosen “democratically”, and will thus become a canon doomed ship. You might wonder if this means the dev has the ability to see the future. But we are not to speculate on the dev’s identity, so while we can’t theorize they are clairvoyant, we also can’t speculate they aren’t. Checkmate.

In fact, The Website Formerly Known As Twitter is now sometimes referred to as “X”, an obvious reference to the X on this screen. Because surely no one would be so absolutely idiotic as to just name the website “X” for no reason.

But hold on, isn’t this X actually Roman numeral 10 for Min?

Well, obviously. We never saw Min’s corpse in her execution, which means she survived and is the second mastermind alongside J. Min is still alive. Min is still alive. Min is still alive. Min is still-

Am I a Whit Young kinnie, but specifically for Min? No, obviously. Because Min isn’t like Whit’s mom, because Min is still alive.

The point is, Min is related back to MonoTV through her mastermind-y nature, and MonoTV to MonoTVid, I’m too lazy to actually continue writing this post.

—————————————————————————

Did you actually read this all the way to end? Are you okay? Do you need a hug? Because this is insane. I don’t know why I made this. Take care!

[irulaan]

I think Raphael would be a terrible father. At least at the beginning (we’re ignoring the fact he’s literally The Devil™. jk we can’t)

Welcome to my ted talk, it’s just a bunch of words. I doubt this makes any sense

Despite my belief that he's adept at charming people and appearing nice, he still manages to do some terrible things to children (eeeh, Mol?). Like, seriously, a contract with a child? Even if we all know he could charm a piece of furniture into whatever he wants. So, handling a somewhat grown-up child wouldn't be a challenge for him, I guess.

A toddler? Absolute hassle. He doesn’t harbor strong feelings about them, nor does he find them repulsive, but he does consider them utterly useless. Requiring round-the-clock attention, they're a burden he can't comprehend why anyone would want. If handed a toddler, honestly, he'd let them cry until they're so exhausted they fall asleep.

Another reason why I think he would make a terrible parent (aside from the fact that he’s literally a devil) is his relationship with his own father, which is also awful. I mean, he absolutely despises Mephistopheles. I'd venture to say it's because Raphael feels like his father believes he's incapable of achieving his ambitious goals. Plus, our dear devil often behaves like a petulant child who didn’t get what they wanted (remember the whole crown of Karsus and so on).

Let’s continue… ehem, Enver Gortash? Like Raphael had this poor child inside his House of Hope where he was beaten by debtors and saw a lot of atrocities. Yeah, he doesn’t even have a paternal instinct.

Ugh, I’m feeling like a Raphael hater!

Let’s move on to the somewhat delulu part: Actual children of his own… finally!

Since our dear devil is a cambion, possessing this inherent humanity within himself (like his penchant for singing, poetry, and writing), I believe he craves things that mortals have, such as affection, closeness or even love (but doesn’t understand it). So, if someone is foolish enough to have children with him, I think he would see it as an opportunity to mold someone from their very first breath. Everything he does is connected to his grand ambition of becoming the king of hell, so having a child doesn’t sound too bad in that context.

He would completely ignore his child’s needs and would be pretty negligent overall. Would plot against Mephistopheles with them.

But to be loved is to be changed, and if someone is both brave enough to love him and start a family with him… well, I think we can appeal to his more human side. I think he could be able to feel ‘love’ for his child but he’s never going to be able to be a decent father. He will go from evil to mean. I really hope their other parental figure is treating them with love.

I think his first child ever will grow to resent him, even if Raphael tried to shape them to be a piece of his giant plan. Mortals are bounded to emotions.

But this is fantasy! I’d be delulu sometimes thinking he could be a great dad! Like actually being warm to his sons and daughters, reading poetry and living in a quiet home, away from the city and near a lake.

[punkeropercyjackson]

HM How do i put this.So people often think 'punk' and 'asshole' are synomyous and this causes problems when it comes to character interpretations(and irl too ofc but that's for a future post).Now i'm not saying you can't be punk and an asshole because that would be absolutely stupid and just incorrect but the latter does not make the former and you shouldn't force anyone to when they're not even if they're fictional since how you treat characters who're part of a group reflects how you think of the irl one

I'm gonna use the example that prompted this post:Spiderpunk aka Hobie Brown.Hobie is often characterized as mean-spirited and perverted because he's explicitly meant as the embodiment of black punks but the thing is,in the actual movie and og comics,Hobs is an incredibly sweet and gentle person and if you think i'm being ridicilous for saying that about the dude who kills fascists and runs his mouth all the time,consider that direct action is not an act of cruelty but kindness towards oppressed people by helping them have a safer world and that Hobie's only actually rude to authority figures and with everyone else he's just goofy.He's also pretty open with how much he loves his friends and always has their backs and i find it very odd how often he gets assumed to be an extremely sexual person when there were never even any under the radar adult jokes about or by him and the smoker headcanon for him is baseless too and pretty obviously only happens for sex appeal

And that's a general problem with both canonical and popularly headcanon punk characters-Most fandom members think punk is 1.Exclusively male and 2.Inherently made to make yourself attractive.There's nothing wrong with finding punk men super hot but there IS a lot wrong is assigning punkhood to them with that intention alone,especially often the characters are not only just EdgyTM but also straight up fascists(Hp and Marauders Flop Era 'kinnies',please touch grass)

This leads to defanging of punk female characters.Katara is a classic example and Zuko is a rich boy with weird biases he's very open about that didn't fade until adulthood while Katara is an eco-terrorist who reclaims girlhood for herself by being anti-traditionalist and feminine in her own way yet Zuko is always the punk of the Gaang in aus.Stephanie Brown and not a girl but Duke Thomas are a poor woman who grew up friendless and abused by her dad and had a drug addict mom so she became a vigilante at 14 to help people like her and is implied to be a metalhead and a black boy who grew up getting kicked out schools and in and out of foster homes and joined a gang of crime fighters respectively but Stephanie is called scene instead(cause pastel punks don't exist right /s)and Duke is turned a meek black boyloser stereotype so that Jason Todd can be the punk Batkid instead,which is certainly......a choice seeing as Under The Red Hood is basically about him doing freestyle death penalty and is not actively an activist even if he does enjoy helping people and does whenever he has the opportunity to by narrative.Very important sidenote is that Stephanie and Duke are often entierly erased from Batman fan content despite being Jason's Batgirl and Robin and i think you can guess why(that obviously the coolest Batkid has to be the fan favorite white boy /s x2)

And i feel the need to include this one due to my url and that is Percy Jackson.Percy is representation for audhd and dyslexic people who can never mask and got bullied and abused for it but remained kind against all world's cruelty and choose to help others since they wanted the world to be like that to them as a kid instead but they ALSO aren't a pussy about it so they openly stand up to corrupted people and refuse to be like them no matter how hard they try to get them to and they openly hate them for what they're like and they act like a parental figure to younger minorities.Their creator stated he never inteded Percy as being bisexual and has no interest in it but he also said he'd be happy and supportive of Percy being played by a poc one day and within the books Percy is extremely transfem-coded so obviously the fandom pops several blood vessels when literally any of this is aknowledged because they read the wrong books and wanted a white male power fantasy in ancient greek gays flavor

You can be super nice and punk because punk is a subculture,not an entire personality type.And i hate to break it to edgecases on here but being super mean to people without a justified reason because you think it's cool or finding irresistibly hot on others is one of the most normal things you can do

[vault-kid]

Literally what haven’t you answered… hmmmm these may be repeats but 65, 66, 62, 60, 59?

goodness me i am so sorry for responding to these NOW </3 59. Do they idolize anything / anyone?

I don't think Luna idolizes anyone, really. She does look up to a couple of people, though.

Sarah Lyons. Luna really wishes she could be like Sarah; to be as strong and badass as she is. While working together, Sarah took notice of Luna and Butch's weird dynamic and asked her about it so Luna told her their history and eventually ended up asking for (love) advice. Not like Sarah really had much to say on the matter, but...

Agatha! Like, she also wants to be an old lady living alone in the middle of nowhere, secluded and unbothered by the shits of the Wasteland.

The AntAgonizer... no, i'm not going to elaborate.

60. Are they religious? Spiritual?

Apologies for the long ass replyyyy. This topic is just interesting to me and I love talking about it so thank u for asking teehee giggle

I went on a tangent once about this hehe (and i guess ill be going on another one now) but essentially, I definitely feel like Luna would've grown up being religious. With the obvious religious references and all that, I kind of headcanon James incorporating religion (not forceful or to an extreme) into their day to day life in the Vault, plus the whole Vault propaganda like you once mentioned.

Yes, she did grow up religious and believing, like praying every so and then at the dinner table with James, talking about Heaven (and talking about Catherine being a guardian angel, or something of the sort), obviously talking about the Revelations verse and the Bible, among other (i'd say almost subtle) ways. Maybe to James it meant a bit more, so to Luna it was just a normal thing, so she followed it too. James didn't use it to reprimand anyone, but more so to teach morals or values tied to it, and connect Luna with Catherine, or to connect all of them together (if that makes sense). James also always spoke to Luna about seeing it as something to find comfort or guidance in, if she needed it (Which she does, but she doesn't really express it, it's a way more internal thing!). After leaving the Vault, she did use it for guidance, praying to find James, and praying to Catherine to help her find him, too. It seemed a bit desperate, but who can blame her. But, her faith slowly went down the shitter after seeing how fucked up the outside world was, how people often just used her, and how nothing/nobody was going to save or help her out here. It really affected how she felt about believing. She felt abandoned, by everyone, by God. At one brief point, even by Catherine (Mommy issuueeesss) And like I mentioned in my other post, she just completely stopped being religious, and has this sort of resentment towards it after James died.

Luna did use her beliefs and morals for the good of the Wasteland, even after she stopped believing. She will never try to be anything but good. I know being a good person and having good morals isn't inherently tied with religion or God or anything, but in this case, it's just how she's always seen it. She also still has some sort of spirituality, though. Maybe mom and dad are looking out for her from somewhere, somehow?

Yet at this point, it's just a burden to her to think that way. But she still wants to be good, she has to be good, for the good of the Wasteland, for James and Catherine. And I feel like the sacrificial lamb metaphor and symbolism matches her perfectly.

62. Do they have any weaknesses or struggle with any vices?

Not sure if this counts, but she definitely struggles with taking care of herself, in a lot of aspects. She tends to put people's needs above hers. I guess a vice is she holds grudges for a looong time, lols.

65. Describe their living space. (How do they decorate it? Does it have running water and/or electricity? Etc.)

Luna lives in the Megaton shack! Gonna be honest here, she spends way more caps on her house than anything else. Might as well make it look nice and homey, yeah? She saved up to buy the Pre-War theme, a juke-box, the Nuka-Cola machine and some other stuff. One of her rooms (the only one with a door), is filled with old stuff from her childhood (and she usually keeps that door closed), like her baseball cap and bat, her old BB gun with their pellets, etc.

Before Butch started tagging along (side eye), she did decorate the house with the collected teddy bears. I like to think that at one point, despite being originally frustrated at the fact, Wadsworth also started posing them or moving them around to humor her. She usually keeps her house tidy and organized, but once Butch started staying... That wasn't her reality anymore, even with Wadsworth's attempts at tidying up the place LOL

66. Describe their eyes.

Ahhh Luna's eyes. Really depends on who she's looking at hehe, but... They're a striking shade of icy blue. Clear and sharp, yet they have a sort of tenderness to them. I think the best way to describe them is just melancholic but gentle. (as @/maysettingmoon says: her sad wet swag)